I'd bang her... um... Her...

What?

>>18136853
hat

So fuckable.

>>18136861

Yeah, her hat!

Wait, what?

>>18136878

>duplicate file entered.jpg

>>18136878
if you dont mind fucking a fles woman with porcelain covering half of her body. Yeah, so fuckable.

>>18136905
meant flesh

>>18136905
that is my fetish.png

>>18136905
it's what makes her hot

she's also full of metallic bits.

Hester get out.

>>18136878

DEM HIPS

Sheoldred counterattack!

>Captcha: absorption sickha
Captcha seems enthused about the prospects Phyrexia has to offer.

>>18136957

Now this is something I can get behind, I think?

why not get behind this?

praetor general

>>18136993
because it's full of disgusting, boring skin.

It takes all the appeal off to replace it with something generic.

Sheoldred can separate from her giant spider bits, she probably has a "chassis" more fit for the bedroom lying around.

>>18137014
>2 mouths

kinky...

>>18137003
daw

>>18136993

No nose.

Nuff said.

Dick goes where?
>I dunno, lol.

don't make me post that fapfic, /tg/

don't make me do it

>Praetors

>>18137080
what fapfic?
There's a fapfic?

That's all the Norn I've got, the rest's been posted. I've got other Phyrexian art, though, if people are interested?

>>18137080

You know you want to, and there's nothing we can do about it

>>18137101
it involves transgender shit and a lot of useless exposition.

You Praetors have a lot to answer for.

You will get yours soon enough... Very soon.

>>18137080
>not posting fapfics
>2012

>>18137113
fuck yea, keep it up.

>>18137101

There's an mtg fapfic involving Karn/Xantcha and the mirrodinian praetors, yes. It was written by request by some kind anon.

Kinda wierd, though. Wasn't my cup of tea, but I saved it because I'm a collector (not The Collector) of most things /tg/.

>>18137113
Yes, please.

NISSA, THE TRAITOR/WHORE.

>>18137131
>>18137134
Alright then.

>Hinting at stories on /tg/
>Expecting /tg/ not to demand stories posted

I'm disappoint.

>>18137080
post fapfic
>>18137113
post more

>>18137113
can you post more recent phyrexian stuff before heading to the old stuff?

>>18137139
It's GLissa.

Post a link to the fapfic!

>>18137139
>nissa

That's Glissa.

>>18137127

I always found myr ti be the cuteness incarnated

>>18137151

http://pastie.org/3482913

Well, fine. THere you go. You made me do it. Posting via pastie because this is a blue board. Cough.

>>18137162
I was planning on. New Phyrexia was the first set I ever played, so that's where the majority of my Phyrexian artwork comes from. The older stuff I've seen just look a bit crap, IMO.

>>18137173
>Karn becomes a little girl
What?

Also, the Might and Weakstone are Karn's eyes and those are what animate him, so how can they be ripped out without making him blind and killing him?

>>18137197
all righty then

I have the weirdest boner

Does mtg has a database with detailed lore ? All I could find was strategies and little paragraphs about important characters

>>18137322
Let's see what some Lesdom Sheoldred can do about that.

>>18137173
>karn becomes a girl and is raped

why can't there be normal fapfics.....

>>18137349
The daily MTG blog has fluff/flavour articles up now and then, especially in the runup to a new release. There are also tie-in novels and comics, though the novels apparently aren't very good, even by tie-in standards.

>>18137350

>>18137350
>that feel when you will never be raped by Sheoldred

>>18137359
Given the subject matter, I don't know why you expected something normal.

>>18137172
That, and they are a damn-awesome tribe to play. Nothing more awesome than non-douchy artifact squirrels!

I always thought Elesh Norn looked like a really disturbing celestial of some kind. One of the high-concept ones that barely think like humans and basically do the turn people to salt/lay the crops low/turn the water to blood kinda stuff.

>>18137322
>>18137319
>I have the weirdest bonehoard

>mfw this thread

>>18137472
>>18137172
>>18137127
Crap yes Myrbros.

>>18137517
Huh. I never noticed the little guy in that picture. He's kinda cute.

>>18137581
Yea, they're little assistants cobbled together out of spare parts to assist the white Phyrexians.

>>18137588

WTF am I looking at

>>18137621
Probably my favorite art from NPH

>>18137621
Surgical Extraction.

Use your imagination.

>>18137561
You know you love it.

>>18137625
I never noticed the goblin on the card-sized art. Thought it was just a generic spiky monster. Holy crap.

>>18137708
Yeah, and he's basically being fed into a wood-chipper.

>You will never be asked by Elesh Norn to join the porcelain legion because she wants to augment you by herself

Yawgmoth forgive me.

>>18137768

this one is glorious

And, that's it, I'm afraid.

>>18137783
I too am afraid.

New sources of pictures power the Machine Orthodoxy.

Maybe this isn't the place to ask, but eh, there's lots of people in here who likely know the MtG lore way better than I do.

I don't really read the MtG novels and stuff, though there's a lot of the backstory (really more the setting stuff than the actual story) that I really like. I was considering brewing up a game where the players are planeswalkers, so I gotta ask - how does planeswalking work? Like, how does it look, how easily can planeswalkers 'target' a destination plane, how do they see planes (like, do they have to swim around in some kind of ether or do they just have a big expanse of dots they can pour themselves into), how often can they do it, etc?

I went and dug up a few more. Not many, but still.

>>18137830

They seem to just appear with little to no difficulty.
You can see it done in the intro to Duels of the Planeswalkers.

>>18137830
All I know is that when a Planeswalker comes to power - gains their Spark, it's called - they randomly teleport to a new Plane with no control over the destination.

Things you may not know about the Praetors:
>Elesh Norn is really tall

Now that probably is all my Phyrexian stuff. I've got other Magic art, though, if people are interested?

>>18137895
>Urabrask... is not.

>>18137905
>Jin could be, if he had better posture.

>>18137852
Yeah, I knew that. Makes for a great starting mechanic.

>>18137850
Hmm. Interesting. So there's no massive distortion, no area damage, just straight-up blinking. I'll probably give the characters a 'Spark' stat that dictates how many times they can planeswalk per day.

>>18137933
>Vorinclex could straighten up a bit, too.

To all the people saying "wait, wut?" at that fic:
Karn was created by putting former Phyrexian newt/sleeper agent/traitor Xantcha's heartstone (read: soul/core) into a golem by Urza, so Phyrexians merely reverted Karn to his original form. Although Xantcha's original form was probably not the raven-haired young woman she appeared to be, but I understand that the author wanted to take some liberties.
And Karn got the Meekstone and Mightstone from Urza, who indeed died/became part of Karn when they were ripped out of his eyesockets, but that's because Urza was a mere human first, got turned into a planeswalker by the stones, outlived his lifespan by several millenia and was a fucking disembodied head at the time. With the loss of his spark, he stopped being a planeswalker, lost access to the magics sustaining him and reverted to a mere human, so he promptly expired.
Karn, being originally a golem with a Phyrexian heartstone as its core, never had any such fleshly limitations and would survive losing the M&M stones, although he'd probably lose his planeswalker nature since it was transferred from Urza with the stones.

The man who wrote that fic is a scholar and you should feel ashamed for not reaching his level.

Pic related, it's (probably) Xantcha.

>>18137946
Sheoldred isn't very large, but her spider bits are.

>>18137830
Imagine if you will that each plane is a sheet of glass. You can cast your gaze through several sheets but the further you try to gaze the less you can 'see'. Planeswalkers can 'walk' from one sheet to the next, but they can't jump over one plane in it's entirety to get to the one behind it.

Then remember that some jack ass is constantly reshuffling the pile making some planes become further apart when they used to be neighbors and vica versa.

As for what 'walking' looks like? Some Planeswalkers need to use a ritual, others just saunter their way to the next plane. It varies from walker to walker, but the only real constant is that for new walkers it take a LOT of mana to do this. So it usually isn't done in the middle of combat.

>>18137946
Man, I always thought Vorinclex was huge. Might just be the perspective on his card art, though.

>>18137965
What the hell? She's like a little girl.

>>18137985
He is huge. They had to curl him up into a little ball just to fit him on the perspective chart.

>>18137987
Hence the giant monster wheelchair.

Black mana is rarely good for your health.

So... is Karn now free of the Phyrexian corruption?

>>18137987
Keep in mind that the guy next to her is six feet and buff. She's petite, but not more so than a normal human could be.

>>18137985
>Implying he's not nearly double the man's height while crouching

Yeah, Vorinclex is monsterously huge.

>>18138001
Where have you been for the New Phyrexia block?

>>18137987

She's a little worm/parasite sort of thing.

Still I question the accuracy of that comparison. In most images the size difference between her top and bottom halves is less significant.

>>18137965
she's so cute

>>18138028
>cute
>>18138028
>cute
>>18138028

>>18137974
Bueno. That helps quite a bit.

>>18138097
well it is

>>18138022
If you looks at >>18137350 it seems the humanoid portion of Sheoldred isn't actually any smaller than a normal person.

Sheoldred reminds me a little of Shannon's demon form in God Hand

>>18138097
This is /tg/, the home of Thri-kreen fapfics. How can you possibly be surprised by something like that.

vorniclex looks like he could snap elesh in half so easily

>Leave to play some vidya
>See that this thread is still up
>I have no idea what Im looking at, but I know it's good!

I don't know what to say... Fuck!

>>18138318
In a fight, Elesh either defeats or draws with every other Praetor.

>>18138331
thats because she's the best!

>that feel when elesh norn is $24-30
>that feel when you own 3 of her

>>18138368

>>18138368
I bought four of them when she was still cheap.

>Get box of NPH
>No Norn
>Jin and Vorinclex instead.

I don't want Vorinclex :(

>>18138424
>nobody wants vorniclex

cryingvorniclex.png

Is Nicol Bolas still the most magically powerful of the Neo-Walkers?

>>18138430
I like Vorinclex....but yeah fuck Vorinclex.

>>18138430
He's not as bad as the Red one, but I wanted at least Norn + Jin.

>>18138424
>>18138430
Vorinclex is a monster in EDH. You want sad praetors that nobody plays, call Urabrask.

She's a female Pyramid Head, what not to love!

>>18137349
http://wiki.mtgsalvation.com/

God damn.
You guys.
Are amazing for this.

>>18138430
Vorinclex does wonders in my Omnath EDH deck.

>>18138461
>>18138465
I LOVE URABRASK

urabrask+hellrider.dec

fucking reaction images
when i down them all i have to go through and pick them out to delete
fuck you guys

>>18138465
Tooth and nail into Blightsteel Colossus and Urabrask would like a word with you.

>>18138424

While Norn is a boss, Jin and Vorinclex are single handed game winners. If they haven't been removed by your next turn your opponent might as well concede right there. And yeah, they rape face in EDH, and Norn isn't quite as useful there.

>>18138461
Urabro is the only one that can reasonably be used as a general in EDH.

>>18138499
>EDH
>Omnath

FFS.

>>18138519
Shouldn't you be able to get away from Jin's effect with Sundial?

>>18138519
frankly, if you actually have 10 mana to play jin, you kinda deserve it....

>>18138531
Yeah I hit you for 200 general damage after 3 turns of doubling cube+seedborn muse+all the mana doubler shenanigans, whatchu gonna do about it?

>>18138550

Well yeah, but why the heck would want to? Unless you got milled down to 7 or less cards.

>>18138523
Sheoldred is a scary good general. Expensive, yes, but mono colour decks can generate huge amounts of mana with relative ease (black better than most).

>>18138588

>>18138588
Play a non-shit format?

>>18138597
I was talking people who are afflicted. So your opponent has him out. You wouldn't need to discard.

>>18138608
>implying I don't have Whispersilk cloack and Darksteel plate equiped on him

>>18138568
Like I said, EDH. It's weird if you don't have 15 mana before the games over.

>>18138635
What turn is this again? Because any game that lasts past turn 8 is boring as fuck.

Is the red part of her exposed muscle?

>>18138635

>>18137962
Yeah, it's Xantcha. Or something that looks like her, at any rate.

The first run of Sleeper Agents was kind of a failure, because they basically just used uncompleated newts. So, they were all small, mousy, genderless, and identical-looking.

Apparently, Xantcha was rendered from fresh meat harvested from dominaria, rather than the same old recycled biomass that had been churning around the Fane of Flesh for the last few millennia.

>>18138655
Yup. She has no skin.

All the parts that aren't covered in shiny white porcelain are exposed meat.

>>18138655
Yes. The design motief of white-aligned phyrexians is that they don't like skin, and they're basically exposed stirated muscle with porcelain-like metal plates..

Their "religion" is souless, mechanistic, and very, very literal. Since they're in favor of everything being linked together, and skin is a divider, they like to flay things a lot.

>>18138703
Oh my. Not sure why but in this case this does not seem as negative as it would be on any other attractive women. How odd.

>>18138634

Oh, the second affect? Yeah you could get out of that with Sundial, but then it wouldn't be too hard for someone to blow up the sundial either. If they're playing blue and they have that much mana, they will make it disappear if they want.

>>18138663
Okay, you got rid of the cloak, you get to live one more turn.

>>18138771

>>18138703
I want to slowly slide my tongue across the red parts.

How would that feel? I want to see the reaction.

>>18138792
I still have Omnath, ergo I still have 200 mana and multiple ways of giving him hexproof/shroud, once you let me get that high either zhe everyone else gangs up on me and I die or I kill everyone else.

>>18138837
It would be sticky

>>18138837
ever had a bad scrape/cut, and the healing skin feels raw and sensitive, thinner then normal?

i would imagine its like that.

>>18138848
And very painful I would imagine

>>18138848
>Eat Norn out
>Get tongue stuck to folds
Yesssssssssss

>>18138863
I can't even imagine how painful that would be for her.

>>18138837

I like to imagine she tastes like cooked steak for some reason.

I heard that it wasn't "blood" so much as it was something else.

>>18138884
It would be more like uncooked meat.

>>18138884
More like a mouth full of pennies that have been rubbed with sushi.

>>18138884
I would assume she'd taste like raw bloody meat, with a hint of industrial oil.

>>18138899
Phyrexians have some sort of artificial "glistening Oil" for blood, which serves as an oxygenator and healing. It's probably made of nanomachines or something.

well it can;t be cosntantly bleeding, but it can be constantly raw.

>>18138961
there is something that isnt nanomachines these days?
aslo can someone give me a quick rundown on what elesh norn is?

>>18139000
high priestess of the phyrexian cult.

that's all

>>18138923
>>18138908
>>18138904
>>18138884
Jesus /tg/, were some sick fucks.

>>18139000
Look at OP's pic.
You see that white and sanguine goddess?
That's Elesh Norn.

>>18139000
She's the white mana praetor of New Phyraxia.

There's one praetor for every color of mana, they're basically the rulers of of their respective colors.

They also sort of don't like each other.

>>18139014
Oh I am not saying I want to do it, I just doubt she is going to taste like a cooked steak.

>>18139014

You can't tell me you wouldn't lick >>18136816 's belly.

>>18139014
If you think -that's- nasty, I'm still trying to postulate what her kisses and nether region taste like.

Remember, Elesh Norn is all about getting things that keep people apart out of the way. She'd probably be fine "becoming one with you" . . . after you flay your skin off.

>>18139027
But... Phyrexia is black. That was their thing.

>>18139048
i'd lick more then just the belly.

>>18139052

I remember after my scoliosis surgery my back had this smell of dank healing and medical adhesives. I bet she tastes like that smell.

>>18139052
Her kisses would taste like normal kisses, probably.

Her nether region? Like a nether-region mixed with pennies rubbed in steak, and a hint or oil.

>>18139048
This is my fetish

>>18139072
they took over all colors and spread the horror of black to each of them

>>18139074
Like kissing a bottle of Vick's cough medicine.
I'm fine with this.

>>18139048
I would not, primarily because I am programed to not cause pain. It would take a great deal of coaxing on her part to make me believe that she desired me to lick her even though it would cause her pain. I am no good with masochists because causing pain is foreign to my idea of what constitutes proper bedplay.

>>18139072
Not anymore.

>>18139072
Phyrexian Oil seeped into every part of Mirrodin atleast a little, so every colour of mana on Mirrodin was afflicted.

Sheoldred combined with the grimoire of the dead from innistrad makes for fun times

>>18139104
where are you getting that it inflicts pain on her?

>>18139104
Sadomasochist here.
You just made Norn seem a million times better to me now.
I didn't think that was possible.
Th...thank you.

>>18139122
Giving Pyhrexia The Necronomicon seems like a ver, very bad idea, bro.

>>18139132
Get out Hester.
>>18139104
>implying it would cause her pain
>implying that even if it did, she wouldn't like it.

>>18139104
she's smiling in the pictures and hell, even in the original art she does not look as though she is in pain. I believe its safe to assume she is a fully formed, though frail, being, and physical interaction will not cause her harm.

>>18139151
Who's Hester?

>>18139052
I would assume any part of her would taste about the same, being flayed muscle and flesh moist with whatever equivalent of blood she has. Since it seems that even her mouth is flayed, her kisses would taste about the same as applying your tongue to any other part of her.

And most of the art makes it look like the porcelain plates covering her hips converge around her nether regions. Not sure there's anything down there for you to enjoy.

>>18139132
Causing pain to people I like is just a little odd to me. I am a bit of a sadist, but it really only extends to people I don't care for. I don't like the feeling of pain myself, so I extend to admired others that they might not care for it either.

>>18139155
>Frail
>Toughness of 7
Eh...

>>18139192
>Not sure there's anything down there for you to enjoy.
That's not fair...

>>18139146
whats the worst that can happen, i don't see how anything can go wrong

I'm sorry, what are we talking about now?

>>18139225
Phyrexian sex.

>>18139223
>Th-there was hope!
>Finally something to be happy about..
>We had time!
>And now it's come to this
*Blows own brain out*

>>18139225
The best way to bring Elesh Norn to orgasm, apparently.

>implying the phyrexins won't all become planeswalkers and spread the oil to other worlds just like in norn's flavor text

>>18139248

Oh okay.

Ehm...

DO NOT FIST ROBOT GIRLS! That is all.

>>18139285
>Implying they're robots
People from Mirrodin just have metal-skin plating is all.

Elesh Norn and Phyrexian whites have porcelain is all.

Mmm, dat porcelain.

>>18139192
>Not sure there's anything down there for you to enjoy
Check it; the squishy raw meat part goes all the way down. Those plates just cover her outer hips.

Besides, if she didn't have any gubbins down there, why would she bother to wrap her lower body in that red cloth?

>>18139336
no, it's not all, they have a metallic chassis, and are built as much as grown.

>>18139270
Care to share your insight on the topic?

>>18139353
fashion

>>18139336

I stand corrected.

Well, I wouldn't put my dick in any of them...
Unless one of them has a WELL lubed hole somewhere on their body.

>>18139394
After earning my redwings, I can safely say blood makes for ok lube.

>>18139394
What do you think all that Phyrexian oil is really for?

Oh man, someone actually saved and RELINKED the Praetor/Karn/Xantcha fapfic I wrote for /tg/ last year? Crazy.

>>18139427
it doesn't. It's the contrary

>>18139427
Hell, as long as it's liquid, it can be used as lube, or in a radiator. Don't use syrup for the radiator though.

>>18139427

What about a hole, or am I just going to rub my dick on these, things, till I get lucky or torn a new one.

This subject has taken a dark turn now, hasn't it? If not, darker.

>>18139479
Can we ask for moar elesh norn?

>>18139608

I'm not really here with the intention to write. What'd you have in mind?

>>18139640
Elesh Norn sexy adventure time?

>>18139674

>>18139674

How can she have sexy adventures when she's just a construct grown in a vat to spread the gospel of Phyrexia?

>>18139764
I don't know about you, but the prospect of "becoming one" with Elesh would make me much more willing to embrace the Phyrexian faith.

>>18139764
Hostile sexy plane.

>>18139640
motherly Eesh Norn taking care of fleshy memnites

>memnites
>not myr

>>18140004
them to

>>18140069
HHHHHHHHHHNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGG

>>18139804

>I don't know about you, but the prospect of "becoming one" with Elesh would make me much more willing to embrace the Phyrexian faith

Yeah, being reduced to vat nutrients is totally like sex.

>We /d/ now

>>18140181
>Implying we weren't already /d/-lite.

>>18140181
>/tg/ has always been a conglomeration of /d/, /tg/, /x/, the finer parts of /v/, and any other board worth mentioning.

>>18140150
can we get some art of elesh in this style? Saying we want you to 'become one' or 'for phyrexia' or something?

>>18140181
>now

>>18140196
>>18140190
>>18140181

>Did someone say monster-girl thread?

>>18137164
Holy shit, it's those creatures from that planet in Pitch Black.

>>18140215

Fortunately, I happen to have with me today...

Okay, it's not Norn, but still.

>>18140342
oh this is perfect!
Thanks!

>>18140342
<3

>>18140342

Thank you!

God dammit /tg/, this thread better be alive by the time I get home.

>>18140342

The shit you find, woman.

Why am I still surprised?

>>18140459
speaking of that, are we autosaging yet?

>>18140472
You're just lucky I was able to find it. The thing was buried in the depths of a Fantasy image folder, and I have no idea why I saved it there.

>>18140488

Meh, random saving spurge?

Saving so much stuff you don't care where is goes!

>>18140485
17 or so posts left

someone archive this shit

>>18138635
Revoke, Revoke, reprisal.
6 mana, good day

>>18140150
>being reduced to vat nutrients
But that isn't what the Phyrexians do to you at all.

They brainwash you, flay off your skin, replace your blood with oil, and graft biomechanical bits onto you to improve your pathetic organic form.

>>18140624
1/4 requests.
chanarchive(dot)org

>>18140692

only a select few. most are just rendered down to proteins

>>18140719
well that was fast....
someone want to make this thread part 2?

>>18140692
You just kind of made the Phyrexians sound like the Bork.

>>18140880

>>18140880
>Bork
bork bork bork

>>18140880
Man, you really borked that up.

/tg/ Trivia: where did the word 'bork' orginate?

>>18140799
Don't let autosage end the party early. The thread continues at its new address! See >>18141005

>>18140912
>>18140927
>>18140998
40k crossover idea if Borg entered 40k. Eventually came to 'what if a borg assimilated a ork'. Thus the Bork came into being.

Its somewhere on 1d4chan or sup/tg/, I'm sure.

>>18140998
I would assume it came from that crazy Colonel Sanders looking motherfucker Robert Bork who was nominated for the US Supreme Court a few years back.

>>18141055
>>18141061
Nope, it's a dig on the swedes, it goes something along the lines of:

Q: "What did the swedish /xyz/ say when /wtv/?"

A: "I don't know, it all sounds like 'bork' to me!"
Alternate A for those who've heard the joke before: "bork bork bork"

I might be convinced to write up some fapfiction for /tg/...

I just might be convinced...

But how will you push me to do just that, /tg/?

>>18141303
you may want to pitch that to the new thread
>>18141005

>>18137830
>>18137974
Check out Zelazny's Amber series. I always imagined the shadow walking described there to be what planeswalking was like.

>>18139276
I think a phyrexian planeswalker would he cool.

>>18143769
Venser's dead ass is just lying around Karn's throne last we heard from it. Come, Sheoldred, whisper sweet nothings into his ears, bring him to compleation.

Phyrexian Zombie Venser would make a pretty good Father of Machines considering what a great Shaper he was.

>>18144716
he didnt leave a corpse, just a helmet and his heart in karn's body

>>18144925
wut. did he disintegrate?

>>18146532
He got plot-fucked with some curse that caused his body to start to fade, so he used the last of his life to planeswalk his heart into Karn's body to replace Xantcha's corrupted heartstone.

And thus a god was reborn.