Get in line.

>>19076470
A little early, but I'm not complaining.

We're going to have to mentor Ayumu some more after this.

Bow towards Mio with a flourish.
"Thank you, Mio. I aim to please."

prepare for boarding.

Smirk in return, and also walk towards her.
>"Well, I'm sure you'd like everything else I have to show."

We must show her we can be the man of this relationship.

>>19076486
>started early just in case this thunderstorn raging outside fucks up electricity.

I liked the clock themed Twitter. The new one is to "Active".

Can't please everyone though.

>>19076496

can ask thor for help, hes a bro

>>19076470

good afternoon mio-chan

glad you finally came, was thinking that you won't come given how busy you are.

[keep cool, small chat and get the fuck ready to run if she does some sudden movements]

>>19076482
>>19076488
Well these two guys are of no help.

>>19076494
I would prefer to not come on that strongly.

are we wearing that orich undies?

>>19076551
No, we're in blue speedos.

"Is that so Mio?" You say with a smirk in return.
As she takes another step towards you, you mirror her and do the exact same thing, all the while dragging Miki who was hanging off your back.
"Yes. Yes I did. Tell me dear wife, when did you get so good at singing and dancing like a girl?" she asks.
"Just something I picked up in the past. Just another skill from my repertoire. You'd be surprised at everything else I can do."
Another step from both of you, the gap begins to close.
"Really now? And pray-tell when will I get to see your other skills in action?" she asks, her eye locked with yours.
A couple more steps, your faces are now mere inches from each other.

Everyone is watching this spectacle, no one daring to utter a word.
The tension in the air was so thick, you could have cut it with a knife.

WAT SAY?

>>19076557
"I can show you right now. Are you any good at volleyball?"

>>19076557

>wat say

i believe its time for a proper rematch?

tea sword SLLLLLLLLLLLAAAAAAAAAAAAAASssssssssshhhhhhhhhh

>>19076557
"Why not now? The sand here is perfect for beach sculptures."

>>19076570

Reppumaru will break that sword, i think hina's sword is the only one who can par with it.

i say use some ancient kungfu, we learned when we helped an old man from the yakuza

She's seen us fight before, and this really isn't the proper venue for a sparring match, it's a beach party.

>>19076620
I agree with this guy.
She's already seen our fighting skills, we need to show her some of our other skills.

>>19076632
Kissing contest. Whoever kisses the most girls wins.

>>19076620

i am sure that logic will apply to everyday life.

but we are in the bureau, and the party is FILLED with people who are training/trained to fight.

its like the gladiators having a tea time for fun

>>19076640
He ain't gonna refresh, right?

>>19076640
Besides being massively weighted in our favor, it's not exactly fitting for this venue.

>>19076640

i say the swag pile race

we dominated last time, why not now

>>19076644
And some of those people would rather do something other than fighting and training in their down time.

>>19076653

>massively weighted in our favor

mio is a bi and we did say he was a geat kisser once....

we can try kissing guys too....if you really want to win....

>>19076670

she*

fucking fingers...

With her face so close to yours, you can't help but stare at her lips.
Those soft amazing lips that captured yours just a few days ago.
You are enchanted by them, caught in a trance.
"Well dear wife?" she asks as she gets tired of waiting for a response. "are you going to show me something or not?"
The words snap you out of your stupor, and you are brought back to reality.
"Ah. Yes... Well, Mio, Are you any good at Volleyball?"" you ask the one-eyed witch of the east.
"Passable, I'd say." she answers, your faces still inches from each other. "Are you challenging me?"
"Why yes. Yes I am." you tell her as your smirk widens.
She moves her face closer, now all that separates the two of you are a few millimeters of air.
"Challenge accepted." she says huskily, sending shivers down your spine.

>>19076690
So, boys vs girls?
And we are letting Mio break our cool far too much.

>>19076690

PTSD in......

>>19076690

is shirley with her?

oh god... the jiggle that will be had...

>>19076710
No, it is not PTSD time.

It is, however, game time.

>>19076727

there will be when we reminisce on the time how we got so good at beach volleyball

>>19076690
Prepare for Mio to team up with SOFTNESS and we can't play well due to jiggle distraction.

>>19076726

>jiggle
>beach volleyball

fuck, now i have to play that game again.

see you guys later.

You have always been pretty good with sports, owing to your great hand-eye coordination.
People have often commented that you can handle balls like a pro.

Now volleyball, this wasn't new to you, its just two team flinging a ball at each other over a net.
Like tennis with your hands.

"So Hayate?" Mio asks as you guide her towards an empty stretch of beach, Miki still hanging off your back like a blond cape, "How should we go about this?"

"Two on two Mio." you answer her as you have Kraus manifest net and a ball, "You can pick whoever you want."

Some onlookers that heard about the upcoming volleyball match have now taken positions around the impromptu court, all of them looking forwards to what will happen.

Mio scans the crowd for a partner, but very few there are familiar to her.
"I WANT TO PLAY!" says a voice from the back.
Karen Araragi, the girl you fought hand to hand with, steps up.
"I want to face him again!" she points at you.
Mio laughs that deep delicious laugh of hers.
"Very well. You shall be my partner then!"
Karen nods with a grin and stands on the other side of the net next to Mio.

You also scan the crowd for a partner.
There, the eldest Araragi.
And there, Ayumu, dripping wet.
And leaning against a tree, his arms around a large inflatable banana, was Sousuke.

WHO DO YOU PICK?

>>19076754

this game?

>>19076812
>People have often commented that you can handle balls like a pro.

Let's go find Keima and get him on our team!

In all seriousness though I would say definitely not Sousuke, there's no way we would get through without him disqualifying us due to a comedic misunderstanding.

>>19076812
Oh, this is a difficult choice.
Ayumu is our disciple, but I don't know how good he is at volleyball.
Sousuke has great hand-eye coordination and reflexes, but his lack of knowledge concerning the game could be a handicap.
Araragi might just let his little sister win.

>>19076812
Get Ayumu for maximum crossdressing team.

>>19076812
Ayumu will probably trip himself up from nervousness. are those three our only options? if so I'd say the eldest araragi.

>>19076831
Ayumu, will be an unknown.
Sousuke will blow the ball up or pack it with c4
Araragi seems like a good choice, Im sure they have some sibling rivalry going.

>>19076812

Ayumu.

Sousuke would mess it up and Araragi might let his sister win.

>>19076812

eldest Araragi

should know how his sibling moves.

>>19076812
Ayumu.
Reading up on Araragi's profile, and his reaction to us attacking his sister back in the combat sim, I'm afraid he might let his little sister win.
And Ayumu needs to know to not let embarrassment get in the way of his performance.

>>19076821
I actually want to play this game so badly

>>19076812
>handle balls like a pro

Oh the delicious innuendo

I reckon we grab Sousuke, he can go PTSD volleyball

>>19076812
sousuke, remember to explain him the rules, especially the no-weapons part, no land-mine etc ...

>>19076932
That's no guarantee that he'll understand the game, though. Case in point, when he read up on all of the regulations of rugby, and still got himself kicked out of the game.

rolled 1 = 1

>2 for sousuke
>3 for araragi
>3 for ayumu

>flippin

>>19076988
None?

>>19076988
welp

>>19076988
Looks like we're getting Koyomi Araragi, then.

You look at the eldest Araragi, someone you're sure should have some rivalry going with the fiery sister of his.
"Araragi-san. Would you do me the honor of partnering up with me? I'm sure your sister would want to face-off with you as well." you tell him.
He considers your offer for a moment, thinking if he should join the game.
"Niichan!" his little sister calls out. "Come on!"
This settles it, and he steps onto the court.

*roll 1d2*
Taking 3rd

rolled 2 = 2

>>19077065
superballer

rolled 2 = 2

>>19077065

rolled 2 = 2

>>19077065
So a Butler-Batman and a part-vampire facing teaming up to play volleyball.

>>19077065

>3 times 2

let the games begin.

So, is your hand alright, LG? Must have been a nasty shock from your mouse.

"ohohoho, a fine match we have here." Mio comments as you and Araragi take your places
"Spouces and siblings. Interesting."

A flip of the coin decides who serves, and Mio's team gets it.
Karen goes up to serve.

She winds up, her yellow sporty two-piece shifting slightly as she did so.
She serves and sends the ball hurtling right at you.

[ ]Set
[ ]Bump*

[ ]*to araragi
[ ]*back across the net **Add a roll

>>19077173
[x]bumb to araragi

>>19077173
[X] Bump (to Ararararararagi)

Then, have him set it to us near the net so we can smash it over.

>>19077173
Set

>>19077191
Seconding this.
Teamwork!

>>19077173

[X]to araragi

>volleyball
>i have no idea what i am doing

>>19077173
bump to ara

>>19077173
I DON'T KNOW HOW TO INTO VOLLEYBALL

>>19077173
That is not how breasts work, even if she weren't wearing a top!

>>19077211
>>19077206
me neither.
should have though of that before I suggested it.

>>19077225
>should have though of that before I suggested it.
Then why did you suggest it?!
This is the kind of Witch-on-head retarded shit that just causes aggravation.

>>19077238
it's appropriate for a beach party
it allows for physically demanding competition with Mio.
It's not a completely overtly sexual activity, so we don't draw anger from the family for doing it.
i think it was a great idea. i just have no clue how volleyball is actually played.

You recieve the ball, the force of the serve sinking your feet into the sand, and send it to Araragi.
He sets it for a spike, and you attempt to punt it past Mio.

She recovers the ball and sends it easily back across the net.
Araragi recieves and set's it up again for you.

**ROLL FOR SPIKAN**

rolled 81 = 81

>>19077275
TOOOOOOH!

rolled 51 = 51

>>19077275

rolled 14 = 14

>>19077275

>listening to finnish ice hockey championship song
>do dice think its appropriate?

>>19077288

guess not.

>>19077281
STOP ROLLAN

rolled 49 = 49

>>19077260
rolling

Also, I agree completely with this anon
>>19077275

>>19077281
81 is pretty good.

>>19077281
You send it hurtling towards the sand between Mio and Karen.
The two dive to catch it but end up bumping into each other.
Your team earns a quick point.

-----------------------------------
The match raged on, both teams pretty evenly matched.
The two Araragi siblings had the raw strength, while you and Mio had the finesse.

Point after point is won by both sides, and soon you are at a tie, with one more point needed by both sides to win.

It's your team's turn to serve.

[ ]you serve
[ ]let ararararagi serve

>>19077371
[x]let ararararagi serve
He's got the strength that we don't (without Drago, at least).

>>19077371
[X]let ararararagi serve

>>19077371

going with araragi, be ready to intercept.
>assuming he'll put it over the net.

>>19077275
[x] arara
It's like I'm really playing Katawa Yandere!

>>19077371
We serve and have ararararagi ready to spike it

You let Araragi serve.
With a powerful punt, he sends the ball careening across the court in the general direction of his sister.
She bumps it easily across to Mio who expertly sets it up above the net for her.
She spikes it, the force of the blow distorting the ball.

You are in position to dive for it, and you do.

**Roll for it.**

rolled 100 = 100

>>19077402
let the butlers hit the floor

rolled 63 = 63

>>19077402
DIVE DIVE HIT YOUR BURNERS PILOT

rolled 83 = 83

>>19077402
DIVE

rolled 53 = 53

>>19077402

>>19077409
Well played.

rolled 84 = 84

>>19077402

world of pain.

rolled 74 = 74

>>19077402
Savetheday.jpeg

>>19077409

who is the man?
you are!

>>19077409
Well done.

>>19077409
>>19077409

>>19077409
THIS HAND OF YOURS IS TURNING RED
IT'S LOUD ROAR TELLS YOU TO GRASP VICTORY
NOW, LET'S GO
ERUPTING, BURNING, VOLLEYBALL DIVE.

>>19077409
Diving like a madman, you get to the ball in time.
The force of the spike makes your bones creak, and if you were an ordinary man, you're sure both your arms would have been broken.

The ball bounces up high towards your rear, Araragi was ready to recieve it.

As you pick yourself up off the sand, he sets the ball perfectly above the net for you.

You jump and spike it powerfully across.
Mio dives for it, but with it headed towards her blindspot, she is unable to keep it from slamming into the sand.
You and Araragi win.

The victory celebration was short, too short.
You barely had time to highfive your partner as those watching cheered.

Mio ducks under the net and quickly walks up to you.
She was panting, each breath deep and quick.
The droplets of sweat on her body like numerous pearls.

"Swim with me. Now." she says as she pulls you into the sea.

>>19077447
uh oh

>>19077447
A nice swim would be good to cool off with.
Though we must preserve our....chastity isn't exactly the right word.

>>19077447

"and that my girl is how your mother and i got together"

one of the girls is watching right? no way something like this would go unnoticed by all of them.

>>19077462
Yeah, the volleyball match would have been impossible to miss.
Whatever we do, we can't allow Mio to cause us to lose ourselves.

Glad I caught this in time.
Some people yesterday seemed to think that we hadn't invited Trude but I'm pretty sure Trude was on the roster of one of the witches to invite so she has acctually been invited just not here yet.

>>19077484
>I'm pretty sure Trude was on the roster of one of the witches to invite
You're wrong, then. We didn't invite her personally, so she would have had to have been invited by one of the other Witches, and LG rolled to see if she was or not.

>>19077493
She was intended to be invited but we forgot, largely due to her breaking our arms and nearly killing Froggy

>>19077478

we have to politely decline her advances untill she does the proper thing and talks to the girls about it.

it will be hard but she has to reasile that if she gets cleared by the girls she gets to do what ever she wants to us.

>>19077545
Then we can truly begin worrying

I think we should bring it up with her present later on tonight though

>>19077447
"Sure. Very well fought, Sakamoto."

We must remain modest, even in victory.

>>19077447

underwater BJ?

awesome.

"HAYATE IS BEING ATTACKED BY A SHARK"

"there is no life in our sea..."

"THEN WHY IS HE SPLASHING WILDLY LIKE THAT"

>>19077565
"HOLD ON! There's Erica, Ursula, Nanoha, Hina, Perrine... Mio?

FUCK, WHERE'S MIO!?"

You are back again in the water.
Floating next to you is that crazy with-pirate,
that woman that is your huisband,
she who brings the rape, Sakamoto Mio.

Floating on her back, she's still lightly panting.
Each breath making her decent breasts rise up and down.
You observe her, wary if she should try anything, and also enraptured by her presence.
Neither of you say a word.


Finally, she breaks the silence.
"I haven't had this much wholesome fun in years. Thank you Hayate." she says as she continues to look up towards the sky.
"You really are a great man. One of the first ones to ever elicit these reactions from me. How do you do it?"


WAT SAY?

>>19077576
"I just want to make people happy."

>>19077576
"If I knew that I doubt it would keep happening"

>>19077576
"Honestly, Mio? I don't know. I just try to be nice and friendly to people, to help them in whatever way I can, with a smile on my face."

>>19077576
There's no secret or trick to it, Mio. I simply do whatever I can to make those I care for happy. I want the friends and family here to always experience the same joy I've found here, which was so absent in my previous life.

>>19077576
I just want people to have fun and be relaxed.
So i do my best to help them be able to

>>19077576
"When Mike brought me here, I realized that I no longer had to struggle just to survive. The world I live in isn't trying to crush me anymore. For once, I have the things I want that make me happy. I won't ever give this life up. I will never stop being happy here, not by my own choice."

>>19077576
"I have too much respect for my friends, my family, and you to not try the hardest I can. It's great that people think of me that way, but I just want everyone around me to be happy. I know how it is with no one to do that for you."

rolled 12 = 12

>>19077576
Tell her about how we have entirely too much swag.

"Honestly, Mio? I don't know. I just try to be nice and friendly to people, to help them in whatever way I can, with a smile on my face." you say as you continue to look at her.
"ah yes. That smile. A smile so warm it could melt the polar icecaps." she turns to you and give you a smile. One that you return.

Her smile turns into a smirk. And that smirk turns into a grin.
She stops floating on her back and swims closer to you.
"You know... I had so much wholesum fun earlier, I think the only way to balance that would be some indecent fun right now." she grabs onto your waist.
"W-wait Mio!" you say as you try to swim away, but she keeps clinging to you.
"We're pretty far from sore right now, Im betting very few of them would see anything that would happen right here..."
Taking a deep breath, she dives underwater.

>>19077638
DAMNIT, NO MOLESTING

rolled 19 = 19

>>19077638
CRAZY IVAN

>>19077638
Okay, now we get out of here. Teleport to Erica or one of the other girls. If we don't have Kraus with us, swim to shore as fast as possible.

>>19077638
We get the fuck out of there. We are not going to be unfaithful to the girls. She wants any of that, she's got to clear it with them first.

>>19077638

acting like a spoiled child just taking everything she wants.

she needs a stern talking to and several cold showers.

>>19077638
Shark time?
Shark time.

>>19077667
You're confusing being spoiled with taking what she knows she wants.

>>19077654
Nope! We're going to confront her about this.

>>19077638
Grab her, and firmly pull her back up. Srs face.
"Mio, what the hell's going on? Quit the playing around and tell me up front, like the honest Mio I know."

>>19077638
>>19077638

You are Perrine Clostermann, a Bureau trainee.
And you are at the party.

Not exactly the kind to mingle, you stayed at the edge of the throng and mostly nodded or gave small waves to anyone that greeted you.
You saw him on stage, he was disturbingly cute singing and dancing like those girls were.

You saw him play that match against Mio.
They were toe-to-toe, but still he came out victorious.

You saw him being dragged by her into the sea...

>>19077707
Do this >>19077682

We don't wanna get caught in any misunderstandings.

Jesus fuck, how long has this quest been running for and how long until it dies?

>>19077638
CRAZY IVAN

DIVE DIVE DIVE

>>19077721
Dude, it's happened for a long time, and it's not going to stop soon. Buck up and deal with it.

>>19077722
Diving isn't going to get us out of this. We bring Mio back up to the surface and tell her that she's got to stop this.

>>19077721

>>19077721
Monthish? And never

>>19077721
IT WILL NEVER DIE!

>>19077721
Started in Feb, and never.

>>19077721
stay mad, my friend.

You try and pull Mio up, but she struggles and keeps submerged.
She's trying to strip you, but you squirm and manage to keep her from doing so.
Again you attempt to pull her up, again she fights back.

Suddenly her struggling changed, instead of the deliberate, forceful movements she used earlier to keep you from pulling her up, she's now frantically flailing under water.
She's in trouble.

With a heave, you manage to pull her back into the surface.
She coughs up some water.
"Are you okay?" you ask as you keep her head above the small waves.
"Cramps. Legs cramping..." she says with difficulty.
You put an arm around her and swim yourselves to shore.

As you get to where your feet can touch the sand, you stand up and cradle her in your arms.
Carrying her like a new bride, you walk out of the surf.

"What happened?" Perrinne asks as she runs up to you.
"Cramps." you tell her as you carry Mio to one of the deck chairs under the trees, Perrinne following you all the way.
"Are you okay?" she asks the major
"..." the witch in your arms says nothing, nods, and tries to hide the blush spreading on her lovely features.

>>19077721
111 threads.
Probably when I die of exhaustion.

>>19077790
Are we going to have to warm up her muscles with a massage?

Time to break out the oil and the non vanilla-scented candles/

>>19077790
Tell Mio that she needs to talk to the girls.
Tell the girls that they need to talk to Mio.

>>19077790
call over J, ask him to make sure that Mio doesn't move for a while, and that she's well taken care of. time to kill her with kindness.

>>19077790
Well, that's one bullet dodged.
Massage the cramps out of Mio's legs; they're a real pain, after all.

>>19077790
That's when we make with the mad science and hook your brain up to a tear / butthurt fueled generator and plug it in to a computer

>>19077790
"Now, I'm no doctor, but it's probably best if you stay off your feet until the cramps go away."

Pass the Mio needs to be our usual party game.

>>19077790

see to her cramped leg and then discuss her behavior, its not like we dislike her but she has to go though the proper paperwork like everyone else.

we know she can do it, she's been dry for a good few days now.

>>19077790
"Come on Mio, we'll get you a nice whiskey, and see if we can't get the cramps out of those legs."

>>19077790
Best thing for a cramp is a massage.

It's the only real option.

>>19077790
Massage the cramps out of her legs.

Part of my mind is going 'We shouldn't do this for a non-girlfriend' while the other goes 'SHUT UP HAYATE'S DENSE AND CARING ENOUGH AND I WANT TO TORTURE MIO MORE'

We also have to make it clear to her at some point that sex with people outside the family is a no-no and she'll have to talk to the girls if she wants some swagzilla meat.

>>19077865
>'We shouldn't do this for a non-girlfriend'
Fuck that, cramps are painful as fuck.

>>19077865
There's nothing suspect about it at all.

Cramps are serious business.

>>19077906
We've already made it clear. She took it as a challenge.

Did the storm take out LG's power?

>>19077965
Quite possibly.

>>19077965
Maybe. Or he's just still writing. Or maybe he went to get some aspirin for his headache.

>>19077965
It's storming in the Philippines right now?

You put her down in a deckchair, her usual rowdiness now replaced with an alarming silence.
"Mio, Do your legs still hurt?" you ask as you stretch them out.
She nods, averting your eyes.
You touch her calves and feel the muscles contracting like crazy.
Slowly you begin to massage them, Perrinne watches as you do so.

With each squeeze and press, the fibers in her legs slowly slacken, her expression changes from a grim one to one of relief.

In a short while, her legs are all better.
"Thank you Hayate." she says quietly, still unable to look you in the face.
"You are most welcome." you say with a smile.
"Do you think you could get up and around now?"
"No... I.. I think I'll stay like this for a while." she answers as she lays down, places an arm over her face and proceeds to try and take a nap.
"okay then," you say as you get up off the sand where you were kneeling. "If you need anything, just call me. I'll be right here by your side in an instant."
"Thanks." she answers without looking.

You take Perrinne's arm and proceed to walk towards the people gathered around the grill.

>>19077997
We're so goddamn gallant and chivalrous and it's frustrating her to no end.

>>19077997
Once again Mio experiences the bittersweet taste of being defeated by Hayate.

Now, we really should get back to the grill, and the grilling, and having Touma and Gai commenting on our grilling.

>>19077990
see
>>19076496
Don't know if it's STILL storming, but it was earlier.

>>19078017
slowpoke.jpg

>>19077997

>not as planned, not as planned at all.

so, how long untill she:
overpowers us and destroys our pelvis/submits and talks to the girls?

>>19078017
Wow.

>>19078017
About 3 hours late there, chap.

From the blonde pair you see across the crowd you deduce that the twins have taken over the grill, the smell of cooking meat and sweet potatoes wafts into your nostrils.

in the small crowd, you spot Negi, the Kinoshita twins, one of the SISTERS and Max.
They're waiting on burgers the twins are cooking up.

TALK TO WHO?

>>19078056
Negi, ask him what he thinks of the resort.

>>19078056
We actually haven't talked with Negi all that much, even though he's in our class.
Let's talk with him.

>>19078056

Max

>>19078056
Talk to Negi. It's not like he would end up on the swaggercoaster.

>>19078056
SISTERS.

>>19078056
Talk to Max.

>>19078056
I'm thinking Negi. It's time for our parade to be rained upon.

>AND THUS THEY WALK RIGHT INTO IT

ABORT ABORT ABORT ABORT

GO HARRASS SOMEONE ELSE

ALTERNATELY, GO AMKE OUT WITH PERRINE BEHIND A TREE OR SOMETHING

>Twitter: AND THUS THEY WALK RIGHT INTO IT.

if this is what i think it is, my tears will drown this land.

>>19078107
the sooner she burns it down, the sooner we can rebuild it better.

>>19078056
As a complete aside, that is not how you use a Potato Masher.

You use the top of the thing to whack the potatoes, not the side.

The only thing we may have to worry about is the housewarming gift that Eva probably told Negi to give us.
And if it ends up being a robot maid, then that means we can get a body for Naru that much faster.

>>19078056
Negi.
Because Eva probably sent a housewarming gift.

>Notice that autoupdate don't work properly now...

Yes let talk with Negi. We don't had a talk with him for a long while.

>>19078144
>>19078147

And yes check about the housewarming gift from Eva.

>>19078170
>>Notice that autoupdate don't work properly now...

Install Scriptish version. I had the same problem yesterday and had to reinstall the extension.

>Negi
You approach the youngest male member of your class.
The archetypal mage, Negi.
"Hey man having fun?" you ask the little magos.
"Yes. Very much so." he answers eloquently like a true English gentleman.
"I'm glad that you are. So, what do you think of the place?" you ask him.
"Well, It's great. Master told me she had to sell it long ago when she upgraded to her larger place." he answers you.
"Master? That blonde girl you we're fighting during our combat trials under Mike?" you ask him
"Yes. She's my handler. Evangeline Mcdowel."
"Wait, So your master used to own this place?"
"She did... Actually.. She's here right now... She insisted on coming... Sorry." he answers as she nods towards a clump of palms
A familiar little blonde girl walks towards you from under the trees.
She's wearing a white one-piece as bright as the first snow on a winter's morning.
It was her. Negi's master, the Dark Evangel.
Evangeline AK McDowell
"Indeed I did boy, Imagine my surprise when I learned that a Bureau Recruit bought my old resort." she says in a smooth cool voice.
"I'm glad I came. Now I know the face of the one that dared acquire one of my old belongings..." She smiles, a pair of sharp fangs revealed themselves as she did.
"And now I can give you your housewarming gift."

>>19078254
>English
I thought he was Welsh.

>>19078267
The Japanese think it's the same thing, unfortunately.

>>19078254
Keep our butler cool, and don't let her bait us into a panic.

"Thank you, Ms. Mcdowell."

>>19078267
He is, but an English Gentleman is a thing.

>>19078275
Fair enough. Very different accent from where I'm standing, though - a Welshman's accent compared to some posh English accent.

>>19078267
distinction without a difference, except for the accent.

>>19078254
"I found your mad scientist lab.
Mind telling more about it?"

>>19078267
He is but The Japanese don't know how to distinguish between different britons so he is mainly reffered to as an 'English Gentleman'. Quite annoying from a welsh point of view.

>>19078299
Or an English point of view.

Would be better to call him British, but yeah acting like the standard English gentleman is his thing even with him being Welsh.

And now I'm imagining all of those dramatic scenes from the manga in a strong welsh accent and lots of "Boyo."

>>19078254
Don't let her escape without explaining what the deal with the concreted-over magic seal room we investigated last thread is.

>>19078284
And a Welsh Gentleman isn't a thing. They're all savages.

inb4 NEXT TIME ON MSQ

>>19078319
"O! What's occurrin 'ere?"

She pops out of Araragi's shadow, a half-amused look on her face.
She is Oshino Shinobu, the human-like vampire bound to Araragi Koyomi.
This innocent looking little girl with locks as gold as a summer sunset that looks to be about 10 years old was actually a feared vampire that once went under the moniker KAII KILLER

The vampire-like human, Koyomi looks at her.
"What is it Shinobu?" He asks, puzzled.
Rarely did she leave his shadow while he was in the company of others.
"I smell her. One of us. A strong one, a very very strong one." she tells him with a half-formed smile

>Install Scriptish version. I had the same problem yesterday and had to reinstall the extension.

Thank!

>>19078254


My Maid-Sense is tingling!

Brace yourself for Eva's gift!

>>19078345
>LOLI VAMPIRE FIGHT!

>>19078345
Is Hayate going to have to break up a vampire fight?
Is he going to have to BUTLER some loli's?

I'm feeling uncomfortable about this.

>>19078332
NEXT TIME ON MSQ:
なる

New thread at 2200 4chan time.

You are Sakamoto Mio. The Hero of Japan.
You can't believe you showed him that.

You are a naval officer goddammit.
You should have been able to deal with that.
But instead you were weak like a child.

Hey, you know what's extremely paedophilic?

Everything in this quest series.

>>19078376
>checks tripcode
FUCK YOU! I almost fell for that!

>>19078376
Le Fuck

Le You

You are Sakamoto Mio. The Hero of Japan.
You were putty in his hands.

Your bride carried you like a bride.
You did not stop him, nor did you not complain.
To be honest, you quite liked it.

>>19078379
>>19078401
Okay, that's it, she's hit the 100% point. She's full-swagged.

>>19078376
Oh you asshole!

>>19078376
Haha, good job, mate! My butthurt will feed the real LG for weeks.

You are Sakamoto Mio. The Hero of Japan.
And you hate to lose.

You feel like you lost back there.
It feels like he won a bit.
Maybe, just maybe, you should just concede defeat.

>>19078384
>>19078397
>>19078400
>>19078409
>>19078411
When the actual LG posted right after me I thought I wasn't going to get anybody. Nice to know I at least caused a little bit of rage. Somehow.

You are Sakamoto Mio. The Hero of Japan.
No. Just No.

You will not retreat.
You will not surrender.
Victory must be yours.

>>19078442
Ha.

>>19078442
Magnificent.

>>19078442
Yes!

>>19078442
All her stubbornness means she's just going tot snap that much harder when she finally can't take it anymore.

>>19078442
She just won't quit, will she? As expected of a WW2 IJN officer.

>>19078442
Gods, sex with her must take days - she wouldn't stop until she thinks she's won completely.

>>19078442

NEXT TIME ON MSQ:
Brassica Napus

New thread on SUNDAY 2200 4chan time

>Spending the day at my mum's place tomorrow.

>>19078442

>eventually she will win

would love it if she won but later realises that it benefits us more in some way.

>>19078514
>Brassica Napus
>Rapeseed
This should be interesting.

>>19078514
>Rapeseed

welp

>>19078516
If she wins, she loses, because the girls will never accept her if she rapes us. If she loses, she wins, because she'll be permanently added to the family. She's in a tricky situation.

>>19078514
>rapeseed
well that can't be good.

>>19078530
>>19078538
>>19078541

I think that we need to prepare A LOT of Red Bulls for this encounter or get ourself a chastity belt....

>>19078541
Why not? Rapeseed is a very useful plant.

>>19078569
if we survive, it will probably be the memory we use for the sexual stamina potion.

>>19076470

>read the previous thread to catch up.
>see title of new thread.

I know what those make....

>>19078630
Rape trees? With rape berries dangling, swaying in the wind?

>>19078708

behold the rape fields

>>19078442
Guys
Guys
Guys
THIS is why WE need to talk to the girls, get their okay to handle Mio as "necessary" with undue fear of their wrath. Erica and Perrine should understand that Sakamoto isn't going to give in and ask them for courting permission. So we have to ask for her.

>>19078836

doing that would make us winner by default?
we could let ourselves be romanced and then when she feels like she has won and tries to talk to the girls they'll be like

"we knew that, Hayate told us about it and we agreed to let you in, didn't he tell you?"

and then we get punished for it.

everybody happy!

>>19078932
She'll still need to ask for actual admission, it wouldn't subvert that, I'm thinking more to… open the path in a manner that might work easier, with Sakamoto's style.

>>19079012

from what i'm reading she seems to want to get in our pants before asking the girls, surely Hayate knows this. we have to discuss that with the rest of the girls atleast.

i'm all for letting her set the pace but her style could potentially wreck everything we worked for.

>>19078836
I sort of agree with this.

What we've been doing so far is forcing the girls to make all the moves.

If we get permission to chase after her, then we can fight her on her own terms.

We don't need to sex her, that would be capitulating. Rather, it lets us retaliate. She feels like she lost here? Imagine how much of a victory it'd be if we also left flowers and a get-well card. Not only flirty, but reinforcing the traditional gender roles.

That's how we fight Mio. Resist her advances, and make her feel like a woman. She'll get all confused about her emotions and become deredere.

>>19079145
>>19079171
That's exactly what I'm trying to say.

>>19079183
>>19079012
We could however clear it with the girls and once she does break and admit defeat she asks and they say they already had agreed yes

It would make things much simpler for us

>>19079214
I like that.

She's sitting there all nervous about actually admitting this stuff, and the girls just smile and say "we know, we've just been waiting."

And she's stunned, smiles, and then the credits start playing. And during the after-credit scenes we're being dressed up like a pirate.

>>19079183

i apologise for being dense.
seriously.

>>19079214
Should we really be trying to "break" her? I mean, she's not a goddamn horse. Besides, I personally like a little bit of assertive. And if that's a part of her personality, should we really be endeavoring to change that?

Just got caught up, btw. Thread started at 4am here, and I didn't finish breakfast until 10.

>>19079236
No worries. I don't always (frequently) manage to present things the way I actually want to communicate them.

Typing on a phone doesn't help, either.

>>19079423
>4 AM start
Trust me, you're not alone in that.

I'm not sure about "breaking" her, either. I just want to be able to respond without thinking "Oh god, what're the girls gonna do when they find out?"

>>19079423
I don't think we're trying to "break" her, really.

She's trying to be the man in the relationship, and we're just making her work for it, show her what it's like for her to be the woman, and, maybe, she'll like that, too.

And the bit about asking the girls now is so we can romance her without it being cheating, since she wouldn't be against the rules.

>>19079547
>And the bit about asking the girls now is so we can romance her without it being cheating, since she wouldn't be against the rules.
Exactly

>>19079547
There's nothing wrong with two "men" in the relationship. Pants for everyone!

But seriously, she's dominant and assertive. Half the fun with her is seeing what happens when two unstoppable forces meet head on. So I say let her keep that.

So if I'm reading this right, and I very well might not be as I've been up since 7pm yesterday, we clear Mio with the family ourselves, and then carry on as we have been without fear of cheating, and when she finally breaks down we can say, "I already took care of that" and commence with tender lovemaking correct?

SO, in general we want to make sure the girls are ok with Mio so she can advance the plot at her own pace,
we will show her that it is ok to feel like a lady once in a while but will not discourage her being the 'man' in a relation ship,
keep this battle going untill someone loses (we roll bad) and we get dressed up like the living mannequin we are.

the dressing up is going to happen regardless of the outcome.

i hope this is correct.

>>19079770
>>19079759
Pretty much, yeah.

>>19079826
ok. just checking.

I keep downvoting and switching IPs, but this is still alive!

>>19079888
it's because you're an angry, sad sack of shit.
We're doing it specifically to spite you, you humorless weasel.
It's an international conspiracy to keep you miserable, as we obviously aren't doing this for enjoyment's sake.
And really, the archive votes are the only thing keeping us going.
Keep it up, we'll disappear soon enough.

>>19079888
Because we feed on the butthurt

>>19079888
Your butthurtness is just so delicious! Seeing your action being futile is just too sweet!

Just caught up with today's thread.

Evangeline vs Shinobu. My body will never be ready.

Since I really do like the idea of uber-powerful vampires butting heads, what other animu vampires could we throw in in the future? Rachel Alucard? Arcueid Brunestud? Saya? Moka? The OTHER Alucard?

>>19080430
Not technically Anime, but Remilia or Flandre Scarlet?

Flandre fits the blond loli archetype Shinobu and Eva have going, too.

Also, I don't think Saya counts as a vampire. I thought she was a shoggoth.

>>19080430

>OTHER Alucard

if thats who i think it is, then i'm not sure how he would fit in the bureau.

would be awesome though

>>19080467
Blood the Last Vampire Saya, not Saya no Uta Saya.

>>19080467
Would be interesting. Might do a simulation of the Embodiment of the Scarlet devil sometime (Or anything from touhou)

That reminds me. I wonder where Tewi and Reisen went off to. . .Maybe off to a different Basics class or something.

Mina Tepes, the queen of all vampires, from Dance in the Vampire Bund?

>>19080430
>>19080483

Trick there is the facts that:
1) Hellsing Alucard would LOVE hunting these other vampires to add them to his collection.
2) Integra would be needed to keep him under control. She might be up to joining the Bureau to get access to them for helping with the Hellsing Organization's works. It'd be good advanced field training to deal with the weaker of the vampires in the Hellsing world.
3) Alucard is not a vampire. He is an eldricht abomination sin again Creation pretending to be a vampire for shits and giggles. Must say he's a fine actor, though...

Seras Victoria, on the other hand... She's young enough vampire-wise to where she might be a good, reliable heavy hitter for the Bureau to call in when the target must utterly die a horrible death due to dual-wield automatic anti-tank rifles or getting it's shit wrecked by a Hellsing-style vampire. Not sure if swag would work.. And it could be dangerous since she can easily outlive ALL the girls.... If she doesn't eat them.

>>19080430
>The OTHER Alucard?
Adrian Fahrenheit Tepes?
Not that he wants to admit to the vampiric side.

>>19080430
Kischur Zelretch Schweinorg.

Dude has literally infinite power. Killed a god by himself and stopped the moon from destroying the earth. Can also travel the multiverse at will.

Sorceries are fucking hax.

>>19080430
To be entirely honest, I would rather we not do that

>>19080898
Hellsing, being a manga and anime, would put their cluster under TSAB and IDPKB jurisdiction. Also, having been brought over to the US, there may be a bit of bleedthrough to the Institute.
It would definitely be interesting as a simulation, and maybe even our field training assignment.

>>19080467
I know that in the Editors discussions, Touhou was considered as a sort of dumping ground by the Institute/TG for high-powered S.U.E.'s that would be difficult to take out, because the inhabitants of Touhou would be able to make short work them. Also, because of the Touhou Project's nature, trying to police that Canon is worse than all of the Marvel and DC Canons combined, even WITH their Retcon Storms.

Would be interesting to see what Tewi and Reisen are doing here at the Bureau, and what the Bureau's relationship to Yukari is like.

>>19082414
If Touhou is a "garbage disposal" then I doubt that anybody is recruiting from there.

Can you imagine trying to give commands to a creature that can ruin your entire assembled fleet?

>>19082765
Exactly.
The problem with the idea of trying to use the Touhou Canons as S.U.E. disposal planes is that Yukari will eventually get pissed if you do it without asking her first.
And her abilities allow her to achieve Meta-Transit on her own; not the kind of being to piss off.

So Yukari would be a Meta Faction in her own right, if not in power projection then at least in how most Factions won't mess with her.

Also, the Institute would be the one most likely to use Touhou inhabitants as Cleaners; the TSAB has prohibitions against simply killing S.U.E.'s, and the IDPKB wants to capture them in order to squeeze Juice out of them to power their magitechnology.

>>19082925
so far every SUE we've run across loses its power and becomes a wretched person bitching about how this isn't their dream. Then we kill them.

I think dealing with SUEs, even godlike ones, are "standard operating procedure" for most meta-agencies. Hyper-Athens and the Combine probably kill them on site.

In the grand scheme of things, they're a nuisance to be policed.

>>19082925
Speaking of TSAB, how do they feel about us having recruited Nahona?

I mean, that's THEIR canon. What the shit?

>>19083019
We didn't recruit THEIR Nanoha. We recruited A Nanoha. It seems that the IDPKB mostly harvests from fanfictions instead of the main canons.

This will end up weird if we meet the original on a mission though.

>>19083000
>In the grand scheme of things, they're a nuisance to be policed.
Most of the time, I would agree with you.
However, there's always the danger of a S.U.E. becoming a Conqueror and trying to carve out a multiple-Canon Crossover fiefdom. That's when they move up from being just a nuisance, to being a threat. Granted, a small one, but a threat nonetheless.

>>19083063
Branches of a Tree-style multiverse is confusing as hell.

I wonder what the Combine think when they have to conquer the SAME goddamn universe, AGAIN, except this time around their main adversary is some chick with blue hair.

>>19083198
>I wonder what the Combine think when they have to conquer the SAME goddamn universe, AGAIN, except this time around their main adversary is some chick with blue hair.
Terrified.

>>19083198
Or you stop by the TSAB and there are thousands of Nanohas there from the different canons, fanfictions, head canons, books, figures, quests. . .

Man, it must be awesome to watch a battle royale with 52 different Nanohas competing.

>>19082414
>Hellsing, being a manga and anime, would put their cluster under TSAB and IDPKB jurisdiction. Also, having been brought over to the US, there may be a bit of bleedthrough to the Institute.
What.

>>19083063
No way that would happen. There's no reason to send "us" to a HnG canon if there was any likelihood of encountering the native Hayate. Even if Bureau Agents know about the real nature of the metaverse, it would be far too much trouble to deal with 'splainin' things to the native character, with or without mindwipes. Far easier to use a different agent, and avoid the situation.

Wait, you meant meeting the original Nanoha, didn't you? Yeah, that'd be pretty awkward. Still be a thing they'd try to avoid.

>>19083198
>except this time around their main adversary is some chick with blue hair.
Is that a specific reference? It sounds like it could be.

>>19083387
I fear for the safety of the observers.

>>19083409
>specific reference

Nope, sorry.

And yeah, meeting the "originals" of the girls we're dating would be all kinds of awkward.

"What the hell's a Neuroi?"

"What?! In a harem, with HER?!"

"I don't like explosions THAT much..."

"Why... why am I dressed like a girl?"

Yeah, it's best if we not meet ourselves.

>>19083495
Indeed it is.

Also, since I harp on it every time: It's "family," not "harem." Especially if you consider that we're including Mike as a new father figure.

>>19083556
WE call it a family.

Some stranger wearing our love's face will look at her copy involved with a man who's seeing a bunch of other women and not be pleased.

>>19080430
I am tired of you people throwing in canon characters without regard for the consequences.

It's like you never read the Editors' codex, or even stopped to even think about the damage to canons that you're creating.

>>19083771
They're not creating reality distortions because these aren't the Prime Canon versions of these characters.
YOU obviously have not read the Codex properly, if you still haven't understood that.

>>19083771
I've read it, and I did voice my concern about the Bureau recruited from unfinished canons.

I don't really know how to address it, or if LG even plans to address it.

Hayate is unfinished, Nahona is unfinished, SWQ is finished, TWGOK is unfinished...

Yeah. I think LG is just giving us the character we want and not really bothering with the metaverse as a whole.

>>19083804
It would have helped if it was clearer. The quest is really hard to follow at this point. At any rate, I recall fanfictions are "un-canons", or "voids" where SUEs emerge from.

>>19083587
And because WE call it a family, that's what we'd use to talk about it.

>>19083771
>never read the Editors' codex
You're talking about a certain googledoc, I have read it, and it wasn't helpful AT ALL.

Regardless, the metaverse is an excuse to pull all these fucking random people together. I doubt LG's really worried about on the whole for the quest. I'm sure he'll be using elements of it at various times, but probably not too concerned about it.

>>19083943
Not quite.

"official" canons (like Strike Witches where they're fighting Neuroi) are "trees." Each tree has many "branches" which are the fanfics, subplots, what have you.

SUEs are mostly generated spontaneously by bad writing in the Real World, but nobody knows that.

>>19083943
>I recall fanfictions are "un-canons", or "voids" where SUEs emerge from.
That might have been in one of the early Editor threads (though I checked them, and didn't find anything to this effect).

However, with the Tree- and Forest-like paradigm of the Meta, fanfics and fanons are branches off the Trunk of a Canon.
S.U.E.'s create reality distortions that need to be stamped out, and are usually created by bad fanfic authors.

>>19084150
Don't forget that many of the leaves are extremely unstable. That's probably where the IDPKB is recruiting from. The universes that are like the main one, but unstable because they're the way a certain person saw it. As soon as that person forgets his point of view, that canon is going to start to disappear.

Our Shirou for example isn't from any main canon. He's not from any spinoffs or fanfics. He's from the 4chan view that he's really fucking dense. Now take that and combine it with the way Landing Gear saw him, and that's where we got ours.

We recruited the Shirou from Landing Gear's view of Fate/Stay Night.

From how I read it, the IDPKB is a meta aware faction that hides the fact that all of them are only fiction.

I remember LG once mentioning that only the higher up are fully meta-aware.
This also explains why they call canons DIMENSIONS.

Why does the IDPKB hide this? we don't know, but it will be interesting when Hayate finds a Dimension where he is in a manga

>>19084767
You mean like the hentai district that we (as players) wouldn't let the girls get near?

Hell, we did find a pantsless male dressed as Commander Yuki playing DDR.
Now, a good question is, since Yuki made that sim herself, why did she add a pantless male version of herself.

>>19084767
With the explanation that there are multiple worlds, the truth of Canons can be hidden behind the lie of parallel universes.
It would be a little disconcerting and weird for the operatives to come across a manga or an anime that chronicled their lives, but they generally won't make the connection that the product came first, rather than them.
That's the beauty of the lie of Parallel Worlds; it's so versatile.
"In this, you exist. In another you don't exist. In another, you're married to the same woman. In another, you're married to a different woman. In another, you're married to a man."
- Funsch, MVA Agent

>>19084911
And what if we realize that we were fiction first, then what?
I think it would be the time when we get mindwiped

>>19084822
Its her secret fetish.

>>19084956
I'd say it would depend on how we handled the news. But yes, memory wipes are probably how they normally end. Either enforced by the Bureau, or requested by the agent so that they don't have to think about the implications.

You know what I think is weird? we have not met any "real" people
I mean historical ones.

>>19085076
Didn't we meet Rommel or Patton when we visited SWQ dimension?

>>19084822
Or was it a man?

>>19084956
Then it's either Mindwipe City, or Promotion Town.

>>19085102
A canon-local variant, yeah. Don't recall which. None actually IN the IDPKB, though, unless you want to count the imported Witches, as they are based on historical pilots.

>>19085076
>"real" historical people
Do you mean like Tesla, Eisenhower, Rommel, Erich Hartmann, or Simo Hayha?
Or more modern ones like Stephen Hawking, Carl Sagan, or Shuji Nakamura?

>>19085246
ones that arent far removed from the real ones

>>19085343
Those kind of people would have to come from a Baseline Earth, then. And generally, wouldn't they be in more support roles, and therefore not as visible to field operatives like us?

Sure, if we went down to R&D, we might find a Shuji Nakamura (from a Frasier Canon) working alongside Doc Brown (Back to the Future Cartoon Canon), but there isn't much call for us to meet him personally.
There might be a team of Stephen Hawking (Frasier Canon, Home Improvement Canon, White Collar Canon, Cheers Canon, Friends Canon, Law & Order Canon, CSI: Miami Canon), but we wouldn't exactly have much reason to meet with them.

Maybe during the Bureau Christmas Party, though.

>>19085454
You forgot (Stargate Canon) for Hawking.

So, I had thought. What if, on Novermber 24, 1991, in at least one history, Freddie Mercury didn't die, but was instead recruited by [Insert Meta-Faction Here]?

>>19085510
It could be done, if you found a TV sitcom that ran during that period.

Why would they do it, though?

>>19085594
Because it's Freddie Fuckin' Mercury.

>Freddie Mercury recruited
>he gets up and starts singing
>problems all across the meta start solving themselves

>>19085594
>>19085740
Okay, so, you could pop into Family Matters, which aired from '89 to '98.
Home Improvement premiered in September of 1991, so you'd have time to grab Freddie near the beginning of the series.
Saved By The Bell started in '89, and ended in '93, so there's another version of Freddie you could probably save with no one the wiser.
Law & Order (the original) premiered in 1990, so that's another Canon that you could search for Freddie.
Seinfeld began in 1989, so that's another Canon you could pick over.
And of course, The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, which premiered on Sep 10, 1990.

So, just from a quick Google search, that's 6 Canons where you could recruit Freddie Mercury from.
You could have an entire band composed of JUST Freddie Mercuries.
I don't know if the Meta is ready for such a thing.