rolled 93 = 93

>>18809023
Krauss detect Device now!
We shall find this SOB now!

>>18809023
'Kraus, scan for the rogue's Device, and any sign of his latent majaik.'

Have Gai watch the exit, and Hayate goes in to find R.

>>18809023
Holy shit, KY and MSQ, it is a glorious weekend

>>18809023
How many exits to this room are there? Gai covers a different one than us, and we call out something to the effect of, "Froggy-chan's a slut!"

>>18809117
Oh right, that's right. Because Perrine is R's waifu.

But the question is: will he fall for it?
He's still a Bureau operative, he might be able to resist.
But then again, he went native, and his training may mostly be forgotten.

>>18809113
Not to mention Z&W.

It's like christmas has come early!

You look around as Gai secures the door.
One of the large men approaches you, his girth sending shockwaves through the floor with each step, his skirt swaying morbidly as he moves.
"Hey Onii-chan-tacchi, you're violating the dresscode." He pouts disgustingly, "Only kawaii schoolgirls are allowed in here."
"I have no time for this." You tell him as you show the brick in your holster. "Get out of our way or I will brick you."
He backs off, scared. "O-okay Oniichan, no need to be so mean."

'Kraus, can you scan for any latent majaik or R's Device?' you ask your partner.
'NOPE. I'VE BEEN FUCKING PINGING THE BUILDING SINCE WE ENTERED BUT I GOT ASS-NOTHING. HE MUST BE CLOAKING OR JAMMING IT SOMEHOW, FUCKER MUST HAVE JAMMED IT UP HIS ASS OR SOMETHING.' He answers

You have to flush him out of this crowd of deviants.
And a couple of ideas come to mind.

[ ]FROGGY IS A SLUT!
[ ]FRANK NEEDS YOU, R-KUN!
[ ]other

>>18809182
If we can't locate his device, it's worth a go.

Actually, I think saying she likes us more may be better.

>>18809227
FRANK, BILLY, AND SLANESH WANT YOU, R-KUN!

>>18809227
>[X]FROGGY IS A SLUT!
>[X]FROGGY IS A SLUT!
>[X]FROGGY IS A SLUT!

>>18809227
[x]FROGGY IS A SLUT!
And hope to all that we hold holy that Perrine is not watching this.

>>18809227
Frank, Billy and Slannesh are looking for YOU.

Saying Froggy is a Slut will probably get more people active than we want, by going this route we'll be picking out only the Bureau members.

>>18809227
"Froggy's pregnant with my child!"

>>18809227
Were going to need some booze.

>[ ]FROGGY IS A SLUT!

Brick chan at the ready.

rolled 8 = 8

"I heard from a very reliable source that Froggy-Chan sucks all the dicks!"

>>18809227
>[X ]FROGGY IS A SLUT!
Don't actually call her a slut, say something like "She is MY waifu, get your own", or something that wouldn't offend Perrine should she see a recording of this mission.

>>18809255
Maybe, but it also outs us as Bureau agents as well.

rolled 19 = 19

>>18809227
[x] FROGGY IS A SLUT!

>>18809256
Hayate doesn't even need to know that it's true. Wouldn't you be enraged if some guy told you he'd knocked up your waifu? And, if R knows the IDPKB has made contact with the SWQ dimension, he could think we're telling the truth.

>>18809227
[x] other
"Perrine might look cute, but she has the personality of a pineapple!"
>expose Perrine to Strike Witches Anime
>get to episode 7
>dvd version

...Let's not insult Perrine like a whore.

The "Froggy is pregnant with my child", on the other hand, is liable to be hilarious and to push *all* the buttons. Let's go with that.

>>18809381
Exactly. It can also lead to delicious misunderstandings, if Perrine sees.

>a female AI/construct would make sense in a robot body yes? now how2maek the connection
Meh, too complicated LG. Just make her out of pure data, like the Director. Then she can transform, like our other hijacked constructs.

>>18809381
>>18809407
Alright, changing my vote to "Froggy is pregnant with my child".
Though it's probably too late by now.

>Froggy is a slut.

You remember what little information you know about the target.
He actively participates in WaifuWars.
He would defend his waifu, Froggy, to no end.
He has also gone native, possibly making him forget his training.

You cup your hands around your mouth and shout,
"FROGGY IS A SLUT! SHE SUCKS SO MUCH COCK HER MOUTH IS FROZEN IN AN 'O' SHAPE!"
The crowd stops moving around.
"I FUCKED HER IN THE ASS, MOUTH AND VAGINA ALL AT THE SAME TIME USING TIME TRAVELLING CLONES OF MINE! IN-FACT SHE'S CARRYING MY LOVE-CHILD RIGHT NOW!"
Unknown to you, Gai smirks inside his helmet.
"SHE FARTS SO MUCH BECAUSE OF ALL THE CHEESE SHE EATS, THEY'RE POWERING HALF OF FRANCE OFF HER METHANE!"

Several large men step out of the crowd in your direction.
"You talking shit about my waifu?" A buff black guy asks you, his arms around a dakimakura printed with an anime character.
"FUCK YOU." Another equally large guy tells the first one. "SHE WAS MY WAIFU FIRST."
"FUCK YOU ALL," Someone form the back yells. "FROGGY IS MINE!"

Punches fly, school uniforms are ripped.
Absolute mayhem begins.

Huge, mohawk bearing, stripped panty wearing men duke it out with fists, feet and the ocational body check.

WAT DO OH MASTER BUTLER?

>>18809381
I agree. This is what I want.

What could possibly go wrong?

>>18809428
Start bricking. We're bound to find him sooner or later.

>>18809428
I saw this coming. Let them duke it out, keep a very close eye on the brawl, don't let any of them out of the room. Once it's full of unconscious people go sift through it and find the agent we're looking for.

>>18809428
Go for the guy at the back.

>>18809428
>"I FUCKED HER IN THE ASS, MOUTH AND VAGINA ALL AT THE SAME TIME USING TIME TRAVELLING CLONES OF MINE! IN-FACT SHE'S CARRYING MY LOVE-CHILD RIGHT NOW!"
>Unknown to you, Gai smirks inside his helmet.
Damn, Perrine, you're into getting Hayate triple-teamed? You naughty. You so naughty. Damn, girl.

>>18809428
Circle around the edge of the brawl, have Kraus scan the faces for a facial match with our photo of R.
Once we find him, we fall on him like a one-ton brick.

>>18809428
Sit back and wait. We'll take the last man standing as our next info press.

>>18809428
Now we bring up Frank.

"Hey Raj, I heard Frank's lookin' for you!"

>>18809428
Make sure *all* of them are knocked out, then proceed to go around to each one and compare face to photo until we have a match.

>a female AI/construct would make sense in a robot body yes?
We've already shown that the Bureau can create fully physical forms for their AI constructs using majaik.
A permanent physical body isn't necessary, as long as the AI is bonded with a user and Device, and gets a supply of majaik from the user.

>>18809508
It would allow us to have that robomaid, though. Which is, I think, exactly what LG is going for.

Someone comes at you with a wildly thrown punch, you evade and introduce his face to your brick.
You and Gai are eventually dragged into the fray.

The brick performs beautifully, taking down opponents left and right.
As you duck under a clumsy karate chop and counter with brick to the groin, Erica mentillates you.
'SOMEONE JUST RAN OUT THROUGH THE BACK! WE THINK IT'S HIM. Pursuing on foot!'

You need to get out of this neckbeard battle and assist your team.

**ROLL FOR GETTING OUT**
Taking first one only.

>>18809526
I suppose it comes down to whether we want a maid permanently at the house, or if we want to be able to have them appear alongside our other familiars wherever we go.

>>18809526
That would peacefully cut the Moral Hatting Debate once and for all, but it leaves the problem of us nearing Swag Singularity

rolled 3 = 3

>>18809541
Gotta fly now

rolled 81 = 81

>>18809541

rolled 26 = 26

>>18809541
Aw shit. We fucked up.

>>18809460
We could *probably* invent a temporary clone potion that makes a few identical copies of us for an hour or so. Like that jam in Akiko-san to Issho.
So we could, theoretically, triple-team all the girls at once if they wanted it.

>>18809556
FUCK YOU UDZ, I ROLLED THAT 81 AND YOU RUINED IT

>>18809526
I personally don't want a robomaid with a full human personality. I'd prefer an actual, y'know, robot.
>>18809556
UDZ
FUCK YOU
SERIOUSLY

>>18809556
HUE

rolled 26 = 26

>>18809574
SOME ONE HAD TO FUCK IT UP, AND LOOKOUT'S NOT HERE YET

>>18809556

What did we say about using the dice, Udz?

>>18809556
>3
Udz...I'm not angry. Just disappointed.

rolled 37 = 37

>>18809582
>>18809584
>>18809576
YOU'LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE, COPPERS!

You fuckers were mad at me for rolling for the brick, and now look, it is by far the most useful thing that we got in that box.

>>18809578
>LOOKOUT'S NOT HERE YET
Fair point.

>>18809556

GOD DAMMIT UDZ, NOW WE WILL LOOSE ARE ANUS VIRGINITY, POSSIBLE MOUTH TOO

FUCK MAN

>>18809649
No shit. Bricks are an amazing weapon an tool. They're even better than a large rock. Only knives exceed them in sheer versatility. I wasn't mad at all.

>>18809649
For a brick called Demon Slayer, I'd be mad if it wasnt useful

>>18809649

here is one of my internetz i won a while back.

you can have it as a token my apology.

>>18809661
>implying Erica hasn't already taken those

>>18809649
It's only useful because LG MADE it useful.
If you had called it BRICK, the DEMON SLAYER when you rolled for it, then you'd have a point.

>3
You fight desperately to get to the door.
But the large bodied, skirt-wearing men just keep getting in your way.

You brick them as much as you could, chips flying off your reliable baked-clay weapon.
Gai delivers karate chops and kicks with gusto, but they jsut keep coming.

'Erica, keep on his tail, we're in sort of a bind right now.' You mentillate her, as you make yet another neckbeard part with his front teeth.
'Roger that. The fucker is fast though.' She answers you.

You fight on.
----------------------------------------

After about 30 minutes of liberal applications of brick and fist, the last neckbeard finally falls.
His large mass makes the sound of pudding spilling onto a tile floor as he crumbles in a head onto the ground.

WAT DO OH MASTER BUTLERS?
[ ]status report
[ ]Go after team
[ ]other
*Add a roll to your choice*

>>18809696
I referenced the demon slaying brick in my next post, which may or may not have inspired LG to make it said brick.

rolled 44 = 44

>>18809701
[x] Status report. No point going after them if we don't know where they are.

rolled 40, 83 = 123

>>18809701
Go after team, ask for status report on the move.

2d100 because both.

rolled 15 = 15

>>18809701
>[x]status report
It's been a half hour. Either they caught him, or they lost him.

rolled 33 = 33

>>18809701
>[X]Go after team

Why can't we get a status report while we do that?

rolled 24 = 24

>>18809701
[x]Status update

I have to roll, LG demands it!

rolled 12 = 12

>>18809701
Status report + Chase after simultaneously.

>>18809743
>>18809737
>>18809732
>>18809727
>>18809721

Well we fucking suck today.

>>18809701
Let's loot them for raw cash and trade goods real quick while getting a status report.

rolled 13 = 13

>>18809756

rolled 43 = 43

Status report while we quickly scan the room to make sure our guy isn't among the bodies. It's most likely him that bolted, but we don't know for sure.

rolled 64 = 64

>>18809701
MEh, Its probably too late but why the fuck not

[x] BITZMARK! STATUS REPORT!

>>18809756

Man, these are fucked up deviants who get off on dressing up like schoolgirls and whipping each other. I want no part of anything they might be carrying.

rolled 15 = 15

>>18809701
[x] Status Report and Loot the Room

[x] after team
>Gai smirks
Because he knows it's true, or the mental image?

I don't care what we have to do or who we have to do it to, Perrine can NEVER hear of this.

We're not being recorded inside the simulation, so we just have to make sure Gai doesn't say anything. Considering what he knows, that'll be easy enough.

rolled 60 = 60

>>18809799
He knows, bro.

>>18809807
He's our bro, be it literally or figuratively. He wouldn't fuck us like that.

rolled 5 = 5

>>18809799
Yes

>"How did he find out! I didn't tell anyone what we did!" #iwishthiswasmsq

>These rolls.

Looks we aren't gonna complete this mission.

Oh well.

>>18809813
But which is the part that's true? That we singlehandledly TP'd her or that we impregnated her?

rolled 50 = 50

>>18809701
Status report

rolled 20 = 20

>>18809865
Oh, that's irrelevant.

>>18809560
Next potion on list: Clone potion.

rolled 40 = 40

>>18809865
Yep.

rolled 75 = 75

>>18809701
Status Report

>>18809905
Actually, I don't think we need a potion for that.
Mike does it all the time in our CQC classes.

Why not just ask him how to do it, and learn from him?

>>18809876
Know what? You are right.
I'm apparently to sleepy to know when a statement is 'inflated' for effect.

>>18809905
I can see it now.

>Timestop
>Drago
>Clone

>Ten Thousand Falcon Punches from every single possible angle at once

>status report
>go after team
>dem mediocre rolls

You quickly run outside, threatening Hapsiel with your brick to get him out of your way.

As yuo get back to the street, you ask Erica for her location and a quick status report.
'We're near the Pillar of Pleasure, It's a large dick shaped building you should see to the west. We lost the guy somewhere around here.' She tells you.
'Keep looking. Gai and I are on our way.'

You run through the streets towards the obscene pink tower in the distance.
------------------------------------------

You arrive there to find the girls standing under the shade of a large rainbow colored tree, the ninjas are out scouting the area.
"Sorry. We lost him. Fucker was fast." Erica tells you.

WAT DO NAO OH MASTER BUTLERS?>

>>18809942
Damn, that was a good opportunity that we missed. Ok, which way was he going, Kraus can you pick up anything on footage.

Head in the direction he was going, try to pick up the trail and ask people if they've seen him.

>>18809690

Mmmpha..mmm...haa..

"That is not how you do it teacakes"

He/she suddenly grabs your head and thrust her/his hips forward, making you kiss the base. pain like you never experienced before run throughout your larynx all the while tears started to flow.

"now you know how it feels huh?" she/he smirks
"mine is a little bigger than yours though...so i guess its alot worse.. well then shall we start for real this time?"

he/she pulls you head back, just as you take a breath of air she thrusts again. as this goes on, on what it feels like forever, you feel regret on the fact that they never found a cure for that potion....more regret on letting erica and your girlfriends take the second batch you created....

rolled 13 = 13

>>18809942
Look inside the Penis building.

>>18809942
Have Kraus check security cam footage of the area, see if he can find R anywhere.
Let's see if the shirtninjas are able to find anything.
And start asking around, see if people saw him run by.

>>18809974
>roughly spitroasted by Erica and Ursula

You know, I'm alright with this.

>>18809974
>Susan getting gangbanged by genderswapped girlfriends all day

whyboner.jpg

rolled 63 = 63

>>18809942
Because no one else seems to be saying it...

What is this faggot tree?


Anyways, have Kraus access surveillance in the area. If that goes bust, look inside the great phallus.

Check archives, see this in the description
>LEAVE NO [WO]MAN BEHIND.

GODDAMMIT LG.

>a female AI/construct would make sense in a robot body yes? now how2maek the connection

Looks like we're creating our own robomaid.

>>18810073
Duh blank robomaid in the basement, we happen to let Kraus check it out, and poof we got our servant in our world.

>>18809974

this is not an 18+ board, please don't post stuff like this.

>Security cams
>check area out
'Kraus can you get any security cams for this street? Try and find our guy.'
'ROGER THAT FAG-NUTS.'
You scan the crowd as Kraus does his thing.
Around you, people in various clothing walk around checking out the sights and shops. Quite a few of them are entering the Pillar of pleasure.
'So Kraus did you find him?'
'GO CLIMB A WALL OF DICKS MOTHERFUCKER.'
'What. Come-on man, I just asked you to scan the security footage.'
'THAT'S WHAT I MEANT. HE ENTERED THE PENIS BUILDING AND THE SECURITY CAMERA SAW HIM LAST ENTERING THE DICKWALL, FREE CLIMBING ARENA.'

You turn to your team, and call back the Ninjas.
"He's inside." You point at the phallic structure. "Naru, YOu and the ninjas stay here and cover the exits. We'll head in and try to intercept him."
"Yes, My Lord." She answers with a bow.

You, Gai and the girls run inside.

**ROLLEM**

>>18809942

keep insulting his waifu, all the while being warry of the surroundings

rolled 25 = 25

>>18810193
A dick climbing wall, I suppose I should have seen that coming.

rolled 37 = 37

I have a bad feeling about this...

rolled 84 = 84

>>18810193
FUCK UDZ

rolled 17 = 17

>>18810193
Our luck is going to be abysmal, just like it has been all night.

rolled 15 = 15

>>18810203
FUCK YOU, ASSHOLE

>>18810179
Actually, the mods have confirmed more than once in the past that adult text is acceptable on a blue board. Also, you don't mean 18+, you mean NSFW. No boards are 18+.

>>18810179
All of 4chan is 18+, read the rules.

rolled 62 = 62

>>18810193
rollin'

rolled 85 = 85

For blood and glory!

rolled 80 = 80

>>18810193

>>18810010
>>18810005
Yes boner

Also clone potion tacked onto the copy pasta list I will post at the end of the thread

rolled 84 = 84

>>18810215
So long as it's not too... detailed. What was posted wasn't bad.

rolled 13 = 13

>>18810193
This will be tragic

>>18810227
>Also clone potion
Again, I bring up the validity of this potion.
While it might be useful for other people and be a good money-maker, Mike can just teach us how to make combat clones himself.

>>18810229
The threads they confirmed as okay were actually pretty... explicit. The NSFW/SFW thing is entirely concerning images which an employer/parent could casually glance.

>>18810262
I'd bet you're right.

>>18810270
Yeah? Groovy.

>>18809974
So, uh, I was wondering.
Would Hayate's experience and expertise as a male translate to Susan's effectiveness in doing things from the other side?

>>18810287
Just like the rule, that we can link to porn, but we can't post it.

>>18810330
Probably.

>>18810262
They require majaik and quite possibly skills we don't have

Also our alchemy is as much to buff our team as it is to buff ourselves so we make these things.

Also the trolling possibilities are endless

>>18810330
Yes. Gay men can work a cock like no straight woman ever could. Susan would be magnificent.

>>18810339
I'm not saying that we shouldn't make the Clone Potion, because it would be of great use to our team and be a good source of income.
Simply that we should learn how to do it from Mike, without potions, first. That will make creating the potion easier, and we won't be dependent on potions during a fight.

>>18810339
Not to mention instant clones would have considerable combat and other mission applications.

>>18810373
Oh yeah sure, if we can learn it

>instant clones
Ahem.
"Shadowclone jutsu"

>>18810400
For THAT, we're going to need potions.
Because of our constant majaik drain, we don't have the majaik reserves needed to pull off something like that.

>>18810400
They pop on damage, Mike's don't

Also the narutoverse got juiced by the bureau

>>18810387
Sounds like Mr. Green
>www.youtube.com/watch?v=OWz_nRIi4YE

I'm gonna vote to have us snipe the bastard down.

Because fuck climbing a wall of dicks.

I also refuse to let the girls do that. I think they'll agree.

Finally made it goddammit, busy as hell today.

>>18810430
Erica would enjoy it probably

speaking of making new potions...

GUYS GUYS OMG GUYS WHAT IF, HAR M OUT ON THIS.

WHAT IF WE MAKE SOMETHING THAT IS BETTER THAN THE HEALING POTION AND SINCE WE ARE ALREADY STUDYING ABOUT BOTANY WE TRY TO IMPLANT THE HEALING SYSTEM UNTO A FRUIT OR A VEGETABLE.

LET SAY A BEAN, YES A BEAN THAT CAN FULLY CURE ANY INJURY

I AM SURE NO ONE HAS EVER DONE IT

>>18810430
Snipe him down with a brilliantly placed brick? Or are we getting the moe moe magnum out?

>>18810458
Erica has a machinegun

>>18810449

i am sure a talking white cat with a cane would sue us for infringement

>>18810458
Maybe Magnum for suppresive fire, then brick his brain while his still.
I am not eager to climb a wall of fucking dicks.
Knowing this place, some of those might even be real.

>>18810449
nevabindunbefoe.jpg

You quickly find the wallclimbing arena, after taking a left at the lobby and its elevators.

You find it extending most of the way inside the tower,
Instead of the normal handholds you would usually see attached to a free climbing wall, this place has dildos of varying shapes and sizes attached as handholds.

"Dafuk is this?" Erica asks as you watch a particularly 'inventive' climber making her way up the wall with some 'interesting' technique.

Your mark is nowhere to be found.
There seems to be no other way up to the top that you could see.

WAT DO OH MASTER BUTLERS?

>>18810439
I think that even Erica has a limit.

A wall of dicks is just too much for any but the most depraved.

>>18810487
Don appropriate gloves, get to climban.

>>18810487
Let's look for the belaying gear or whatever and have the Gai and the Ninjas hoist the rest of us up.

Or look for a service ladder or staircase

If all else fails, climb a wall of dicks.

>>18810487
Get to climbing, I'd pull up a proper PTSD memory for this situation but I can't think of any reasonable way Hayate would have practice climbing a literal wall of dicks.

>>18810416
Yeah, but Mike is limited to 5, while Naruto could make up to a hundred.

As for the Naruto Canons getting Juiced, that might have been a S.U.E. version of Naruto, or one that was considered expendable since he came from a Crossover.
Intentionally destroying entire Canons is frowned upon by both the TSAB and the TG (even if rogue factions within the TG do it).

>>18810487
Start climbing, watch out for lubricants and such.

>>18810502
Also: "Kraus spotted our target climbing this... abomination. Seems our best bet."

Actually, let's start with >>18810512

>>18810487

i hope she does not try and suck those.

climb with them

Go around to the other side. There's gonna be rigging attachments and various maintenance access points.

>>18810487
Look for a service ladder or elevator. See if we could get up to the top by using the elevators back in the lobby.
We don't have time to be wasting climbing.

>>18810449
As cool as it is I doubt it would work

Making healing tablets probably would if we took a more powerful healing potion which we should see about getting from Ryuu soon

Well, I'm sure this place is host to every STD known to man.

TAKE THE FUCKING ELEVATOR.
FUCK.

>>18810520
Well, if you're calling the Requisitions branch a rogue faction. . .

>>18810519
What about that time we were trapped in a Taiwanese warehouse and we had to climb a wall of Dick Clark, Richard Nixon, and Andy Dick merchandise to escape from the Brothel Owner our father sold us to?

>>18810573
That's... That's a very different wall of dicks.

>>18810573
If TG Requisitions was breaking Canons by stealing Canon-important people and items, then they'd get a visit from TG Black Ops.
The Crumplers and the Firemen are the ones known to destroy Canons, and when they get out of hand, they get hunted down like the rogue agents they are.

Ahh yes, Olde English you are my one true waifu.

>>18810487
Climb ze wall.
Wear gloves if we have them.

Those dildos have probably been used in every conceivable way.

We need biohazard suits.

ive got a question.
Are these floppy, soft plastic dildos? Or are they hard ones? Because that would make a big difference in climbing difficulty.

What if a faction nobody knows about starts destroying canons?
Are there canons nobody cares about?

And finally: is a visit from TG BlackOps survivable?

>>18810684
Probably a mix.

>>18810692
Depends on how badly they're pissed off at you.

>>18810520
If they are in bureau space the tg and TSAB generally leave it alone though.

And an entire canon of S.U.Es would be ordered destroyed by both due to the danger if they ever broke out

>>18810692
The canons that wont matter would be the weak ones, canons that didnt have an impact here on Earth, but by that definition, it wont pose much threat, unless it was a shitty one filled with sues
>>18810684
The question is not if they're hard or smooth.
The question is are there any real ones.

>>18810692
I think those are things outside the scope of this quest.

A faction nobody knew about that destroyed canons would quickly be discovered and dealt with.

TG black ops is serious business. The Bureau is like a large police department. If the CIA wanted to, they could run the place inside a year. Black ops will get their mission done and leave cookies for Santa before anyone knows what's going on.

>>18810748
My god!
Welp this will be something to add to the ptsd list.

>>18810692
They will be found eventually and all canons are cared about to some degree

A visit from the tg blackops is likely if you destroy canon's without reason but the bureau would do it because it is an entire canon of SUE which means if the bureau didn't then the tg and TSAB would do it and anything in a five canon radius to be sure

The factions in the editors setting don't fuck around

>>18810692
-Stop giving him idea's.
-Nah too many people on earth for there to be a canon nobody cares about.
-TG BlackOps? For a normal human? Fuck no. For a trained agent with years experience? Maybe.

>Climb
"Guys. Unfortunately, this... Abomination is our only clue to that leads to the target. We're gonna have to climb." You tell your team.

Hina slowly steps back, Erica grins and scans the wall, already looking for a route up.
Gai says nothing and pulls his gloves on tighter.

You don't see any belaying gear or ropes. it seems you will have to make this climb without any safety gear on.

"C-can't we just take the elevator?" Hina asks you.
"There's no assurance that it will lead to where the top of this wall does though." Erica tells her.
"B-but..." Gai interrupts Hina.
"Hina and I shall take the elevator, The culprit might make his way back down through them." He tells you.

"Okay, good idea." you tell him, not wanting your pink-haired girlfriend to be anymore uncomfortable. "Keep in contact."

Gai and Hina head back to the lobby as you and Erica assault the wall.

**ROLL FOR CLIMBAN**

rolled 43 = 43

>>18810801
CLIMB!

rolled 14 = 14

>>18810801
Well, we're climbing a wall of dicks, this was not in the job description Mike gave us to entice us into joining.

rolled 15 = 15

>>18810801
We were trained by a giant monkey. We know how to climb.

rolled 40 = 40

>>18810801

>>18810779
Yeah the bureau seems to use lesser numbers of higher trained / more powerful operatives.

The tg is like the American army, they will do the job it will hurt and there won't be much left once the job is done, the back ops is like the American special forces all rolled into one

rolled 27 = 27

>>18810801
Rollan

rolled 37 = 37

>>18810801
We gonna die.

rolled 69 = 69

>>18810801
So we're in a dickrace with Erica.

Dick jokes and banter on the way up are obligatory.

rolled 30 = 30

Jesus the dice gods have hated us recently.

rolled 93 = 93

This was not in the job description...

Do we have gloves?

rolled 72 = 72

>>18810801
rollin'

>>18810829
>US Special Forces
>not Australian SAS

>>18810801
>Unknown to you, Gai smirks inside his helmet.
>"B-but..." Gai interrupts Hina.

I feel that this isn't Gai for some reason.

>those rolls

We make it halfway up until we slip and hit every one on the way down.

I'm a little frightened at Erica's response. Did not expect her to be so... open minded.

>>18810860
She wants to watch us handle a fuckton of dicks. Shit this is gonna have repercussions.

>>18810859
It is.

Gai is Ikusa, whom is aware of the timeloop and what is generally going on. He's also controlling our reloads. Which we have a limited number of.

CAN WE JUST SHOOT HOLES IN THE WALL AND CLIMB THEM INSTEAD?

>>18810879
roll for anal circumfirence?

>>18810860
We already knew Erica likes dicks. Only thing stopping her from fucking half the Bureau is that she got addicted to ours on day 1.

>>18810829
>>18810857
Nah, I'd say that TG Black Ops is an amalgam of many different specops traditions.
They have the funding of the US Special Forces, the expertise and balls-out insanity of the Australian SASR, and the attitude towards collateral damage of the Soviet Spetznaz.
There's a reason why TG Black Ops are used to terminate rogue TG and Institute personnel. Because when you have the horrors of deviantart and fanfiction.net to fight, you need something even scarier behind you with a gun pressed to the back of your head reminding you of your duty.

>>18810913
With what? Our dart gun? Our brick? Our gun that shoots rubber bullets?

We're going to climb this wall of dicks, whether we like it or not.

>>18810921
I mean how hard would it be for her to make ursula request those potions from day one.... I should shut up now.

>>18810857
Australian SAS are a bit different and I see the bureau as closer to them than The TG black ops are

A scenario for you guys: let's say a certain place (e.g. Earth) was 'victim' of a major canon violation, as in, multiple characters from multiple canons appearing where they really shouldn't.
As the mutiple factions scramble to investigate what the fuck happened, they find out the locals took care of the problem themselves by the simple, yet effective and quite human method of pumping the 'invaders' full of lead. They also find out the locals gained meta awareness.

>>18810913
Actually that isn't loaded and fired yet, all we know is he has sometimes dressed as a rider. At this point he could also be Kyon or any number of other people controlling things behind the scenes and changing places with people as necessary.

I remember there was a reference to him even possibly being Shirou since he is the last person anyone could possibly suspect

>>18811011
It depends on whose space the violation is in and to what level of awareness they reached

Most common is use that to their advantage but some factions or groups within factions may just decide to wipe all memory and knowledge of the meta from the inhabitants

You climb.
Taking a silicon member in your hand, you pull yourself up the wall, not even thinking of what exactly you were grabbing onto through your white cotton gloves.
'There goes another pair in the trash' you think to yourself.
Erica climbs alongside you, grinning as she watches you 'handle' the wall.

You're halfway up, hand over hand, you scale the obscene obstacle.
You reach out for another handhold, it's warm and spongy.
"FUCK!" You quickly let go and find another one to take a hold of.
As you passed that particular outcropping, you give it a solid kick, a satisfying "OOMPH" could be heard inside the wall.

Eventually, you arrive at the top just behind Erica.
After taking your gloves off and abandoning them on the floor, you head to what appears to be a service ladder leading to a trapdoor.

You climb the steel rungs and push the door open.

ROLLEM**

rolled 74 = 74

>>18811049
FREEZE ASSHOLE

rolled 78 = 78

>>18811049
Rollan

rolled 24 = 24

>>18811049

rolled 63 = 63

>>18811049
Comeon infiltration dice don't fail me now.

rolled 88 = 88

>>18811079
shit

>>18811049
He is going to pay for what he made us go through.

Rough him up

rolled 56 = 56

>>18811049
KNOCK KNOCK IT'S THE MOTHERFUCKIN' BUREAU!

rolled 96 = 96

>>18811049

rolled 63 = 63

also rollin

rolled 69 = 69

We haven't rolled poorly enough, let me try.

rolled 22 = 22

>>18811213

>>18811114
Slaneesh approves.

>>18811114
You find yourselves on the roof.
A low railing surrounds a space littered with vents, AC units, and junk.
You smell cigarette smoke in the air.
Taking the brick out of your harness, as Erica readies her gun, you step cautiously across the roof towards the source.

"Okay. You got me." R says as he puts the cigarette outwith his shoe, He's looking out over the railing towards the twisted city below. "I really should have resisted climbing that fucking wall and getting cornered here."
A soft breeze rustles his skirt as he turns around.
"I'm still gonna put up a fight though." He bullrushes you, His large frame faster than you expected.

The bodycheck was too fast for you to avoid and he crashes into you, the brick falling out of your hands.
Erica tries to get a shot in, but she couldn't risk hitting you, so she circles the two of you.

"I'm not going back! HERE I AM FREE. HERE I CAN DO WHAT I WANT." R says as his huge fists pummel you, every blow like a meaty sledge hammer. His mohawk dancing in the breeze. "AND IF I BELIEVE HER HARD ENOUGH, SHE WILL MAKE ALL MY DREAMS AND DELUSIONS COME TRUE!"
You spot a familiar tattoo on the side of his head.

He continues his brutal attack.

**ROLL FOR FIGHTAN BACK**

>>18811038
I'm picturing the many canons as the galaxies are in the universe, or stars are in a galaxy. As in, an extension of 'space' thought empty actually wasn't.
The place I'm talking about is in one of these extensions, and the collission made it appear on whatever instrument is used to detect canons.

As for the awareness level, every single man, woman and child on Earth now know beyond reasonable doubt that there are multiple universes. They know there people in those and, most of all, they know they are reachable.
Some, naturally, went crazy. Some, naturally, thought they found friends beyond the Blue Planet.

Some, naturally, planned a counterattack.

rolled 32 = 32

>>18811300
MAIM BURN KILL!

rolled 14 = 14

>>18811300
BUTLER PUNCH

rolled 20 = 20

>>18811300
The funny thing is that I've actually met her and she's in love with me. Your love isn't true, true love is hard, it has setbacks, it takes work and it sometimes fails and hurts you deep inside.

You are instead just running, hiding and dreaming. You do not know love.

rolled 31 = 31

>>18811300
You know nothing of dreams!

rolled 42 = 42

>>18811323
what i wrong with my dice today?

rolled 77 = 77

>>18811300
What this guy is doing isn't even that bad compared to what we've been through.

rolled 14 = 14

>>18811300
BRICK TO THE FACE!

rolled 39 = 39

>>18811300
We can't roll today can we.

rolled 1 = 1

>>18811300
You're going home whether you like it or not. Grow up. You had a job to do, and you abandoned it!

rolled 26 = 26

Once more into the breach!

rolled 66 = 66

>>18811300

MAKE HIM SUFFER FOR WHAT WE DID TO GET HIM!
MAIM! KILL! BURN!

>AND IF I BELIEVE HER HARD ENOUGH, SHE WILL MAKE ALL MY DREAMS AND DELUSIONS COME TRUE!"
>You spot a familiar tattoo on the side of his head.
Is he a follower of Haruhism?

rolled 47 = 47

>>18811300
"You could never been free in this enclosed trap of failure and deviants."
Then introduce him to our recovered friend, Monsieur Brick.

rolled 40 = 40

>>18811362
FFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-

rolled 28 = 28

>>18811362
Great. Now we're going to get raped by a wall of dicks.

rolled 59 = 59

>>18811300
Oh fuck that fucking weird god thing that I don't know shit about.

Talk shit about his waifu again and then punch him in the windpipe

rolled 51 = 51

>>18811300
"I've seen her, man, she's real! I've talked to her, not in my head, at the academy. Maybe she'd talk to you, too, if you just go back."

>>18811317
When a world "awakens" to the meta, there's a few things that can happen.

It stays quiet because it knows the big boy's pool is too dangerous right now.

It makes lots of noise and gets brought under the protective wing of one of the "good" agencies: Transspace Guard, TSBA, Bureau.

It makes lots of noise and gets absorbed by one of the mean entities: HyperAthens, Combine, any hostile organization.

A single world would best protect itself by keeping quiet.

rolled 57 = 57

>>18811362
ffs

>>18811362
Oh GOD DAMNIT

>>18811362
We're going home alright. In a box.

Fucking /tg/ dice today, goddamn. They used to love us.

rolled 59 = 59

Guys guys. Stop bringing attention to it. Maybe if we ignore it, it won't happen.

rolled 41 = 41

>>18811399
box made of cocks?

rolled 67 = 67

>>18811362
Fuck the 1.

ROW ROW, FIGHT THE POWAH!

>>18811317
Full planetary Meta-contamination?
An unwillingness to ally with any of the major factions?
They're still too weak to be able to stand on their own.
TG = Planetary bombardment; Base Delta Zero carried out by TG Black Ops. All records erased.
ATN = go back in time, assassinate a few key people, introduce advanced technology, turn the world into another client-timeline in their war.
Closers = kill most of the population and use the rest in bloody gladiatorial games.
Combine = harvest or kill outright everyone on the planet.
TSAB = Quarantine with an enforced DMZ. If push comes to shove, will destroy all major centers of industry and technology.
UPW = Quarantine with an enforced DMZ.
Hedonists = well, you're right fucked. You got the furries.

rolled 46 = 46

>>18811300
Oh what the hell. One more try.

rolled 17 = 17

>>18811473
Oh, what the hell.

rolled 29 = 29

The dice simply do not want us to succeed tonight.

rolled 48 = 48

>>18811483
That... did not work.

You try and shove him off you but to no avail.
His huge bulk weighing you down like a tonne of lead.
He continues pummeling you.
Erica takes a few shots at him, but he just shrugs them off.

"SHE WILL CHANGE THE WORLD FOR MAKE, MAKE IT ALL COME TRUE! I JSUT NEED TO BELIEVE!" He continues, his weight on you squeezing out what little consciousness you have left.

With a final brutal blow, the bear of a man that was R knocks you out.

>>18811547
Dammit. Now would be a good time for the rest of our team to get here.

rolled 44 = 44

>>18811547
WAKE UP HAYATE! YOU AREN'T GOING TO BE DEFEATED BY A DEVIANT LIKE HIM!

>>18811547
Damn LG you look pretty fuckin fresh

Dammit.

[x]RELOAD

Unless Gai and Hina found a more hygienic way.

rolled 59 = 59

>>18811547
Welp rollan for anal circumference.

>>18811591
I don't think we died. We were just crushed to back unconsciousness by 400 pounds of sweaty con-goer. Death may be preferable, but it will not cause a reload.

>>18811547
Now is a good time for miss teamkilly mcchaingun to fill the area with rubber bullets

You are Karate Gai, a bureau trainee.
You get to the roof after going through multiple corridors and labyrinthine passageways.

You open the door in time to see Hayate get knocked out by the target.
He gets up and approaches Erica that tries to hold him off with her gun.
The rubber bullets have very little effect on the man.

WAT DO?
[ ]RIDER KICK
[ ]RIDER PANCHI

>>18811583
That's not me.
He was tagged as me though.
Even I was surprised by the resemblance.

>>18811432
'Live and let live' doesn't work here?
Well, then I guess 'we come in peace' and hope whoever we find first accepts it.

>>18811662
[X]RIDER KICK

The answer is always RIDER KICK! I have yet to find a problem that can't be solved through proper use of RIDER KICK!

rolled 94 = 94

>>18811662
PANCHU

rolled 23 = 23

>>18811662
[ ]RIDER KICK

>>18811547
Come on Aryan Nazi girlfriend, use those skills you've honed as a child soldier to take this man down.

rolled 44 = 44

>get a 3 day ban for no readily apparent reason
>ban expires, go inna MSQ
>dose rolls
>inadvisable shit-talking 'bout froggy
>more of does rolls
Nice to know you still hate me, 4chan.

>>18811662
KICK

rolled 45 = 45

>>18811662
RIDER KICK

rolled 74 = 74

>>18811662
[x ]RIDER KICK!!

>>18811662
Rider kick to the head

>>18811662
[x]RIDER KICK

>>18811662

KIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICK

rolled 72 = 72

Thanks, guys, waste my 94 why don't you.

>>18811727

Being Udz is suffering.

>>18811662
RIDER KICK! What else can it be?

>>18811662
[x] Rider Kick!

rolled 9 = 9

YOU CAN DO IT GAI!

RIDAH KICK!

>>18811670
There is a Meta Cold War between most of the major Meta-Aware Factions, notably the TSAB and the TG/Institute (Closers and ATN are still having their bitter war of extermination, though).
If you're not with a faction, then you had better hope that you're small enough to not be important, but strong enough to not be wiped out in a single afternoon of orbital bombardment.
The Bureau occupies that very specific niche.

>kicku
You break into a full run and kick him.
Without majaik assisted strength, the kick is still strong enough to send him reeling inot a pile of cinderblocks and wood left over from some long forgotten construction at the site.

Hina runs to Hayate's side, Erica and you keep an eye on the opponent.
He slowly gets up out of the rubble.
In his hands, cinderblocks.
He throws them.

[ ]duck
[ ]kicku

>>18811795
Kick, we'll kick them right back at him, because we're Kamen Rider!

>>18811795
[x]kicku
If we duck, one of them might hit Hina or Hayate.

>>18811795
We are not magickally assisted, which means our organs are unusually prone to becoming salad. Dodge, then kicku.

>>18811795
We're not magically enhanced right now, but we're still extremely skilled.
If the block will hit Hayate, kick.
If they won't, dodge, then RIDER KICK!

Rider kick, the solution to all our problems.

rolled 90 = 90

>>18811795
Kick again.

There is only one solution, and that is to apply more kick. If kick doesn't work, you're not doing it hard enough.

>>18811795
[X]kicku
Can't let the unconscious guy get hit in the head with a cinderblock

>>18811779
They are also useful and deal with both sides enough to stay protected from any overt aggression from either side of the meta cold war

>>18811795
I see 13 named variations of RIDER KICK on wikipedia and 0 variations of RIDER DUCK.

Kick that shit.

>yourass against
We are trying to avoid that, captcha.

>>18811779
Great. A piranha beating another, only to be noticed by a fuckload of megalodons who don't like each other.

>>18811795
RIDER KICK!

>>18811779
After the end of Time War II the metaverse was split into two, east and west. This marked the beginning of the era know as the Meta Cold War.
KRAUS presents...

[a shot of a C-130 transport from the bottom]

A LANDING GEAR QUEST…

[another shot of the transport, this time from afar; more credits go by]
5:30 AM August 24, 1964 Time Guard Airspace
PILOT #1: Flying over Time Guard encampment, altitude 30,000 feet.
PILOT #2: Approaching TSAB airspace.
[a shot of the interior of the plane and the pilots; more credits go by]
PILOT #1: 20 minutes to dropoff. Commencing internal depressurization.
[a shot of the command base, which is filled with various support characters; still more credits]
MIKE: Are you ready to go?
PILOT #1: Drop zone still showing a high pressure mass. Clouds and visibility OK.
[a shot of the interior of the plane’s cargo bay; the credits are still going by]
PLANE PERSONNEL: Put out that cigar! Connecting oxygen hose to interior connector.
[a shot of Hayate indifferently smoking his cigar, the credits are roughly half-way over by this point]
PLANE PERSONNEL: Put on your mask!

DUN DUN DA DUN DUN DAH - DUN DUN DAH

You kick the cinder block away and over the railing.
Using the same momentum in that kick, you spin around and deliver a spinning heelkick that barely misses R's face.
He backs off and picks up a length of wood.

You continue pressing him.
"HARUHI WILL MAKE ALL OUR DREAM COME TRUE! CAN'T YOU SEE?!" he screams as his delusions get the best of him
"SHE WILL RESHAPE THE UNIVERSE TO MAKE SURE EVERYONE IS HAPPY. DON'T YOU WANT TO BE HAPPY?!"

With a crazed look in his eyes, he comes at you with the length of wood.

[ ]ridah chop
[ ]ridah lead pipe

rolled 42 = 42

>>18811941
>[x]ridah lead pipe

>>18811941
[X]ridah lead pipe

>>18811941
[x] pipe
Oh god I hope he's actually crazy and Haruhi isn't really lose. Because even a simulation of a power-aware Haruhi is fucking terrifying.

rolled 34 = 34

>>18811941
Lead pipe. Shatter that wood, then shatter his face.

rolled 91 = 91

>>18811941
>[ ]ridah chop
DO YOU HONESTLY THINK A BIT OF WOOD WILL STOP A RIDER CHOP? WE'LL GO RIGHT THROUGH THAT SHIT, WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK WE ARE

>>18811941
Hmm tough choice. Also Haruhi? I don't like where this is going.

[x]ridah lead pipe
Gotta get the original moves in.

>[ ]ridah lead pipe
The pipe demands blood!

>>18811972
>Haruhi
Don't worry too much about it. This is just a simulation.
There were probably WERE deep-cover agents at Infinicon that went native and joined a Haruhism cult.
These simulations are based off of real case files, for the most part, according to Mike.

rolled 78 = 78

>>18811941
[ ]ridah lead pipe

>>18811965
Chop Suey it is then.

rolled 90 = 90

>>18811941
RIDER PIPE!

>brb taking a quick shower.
fucking hot here shit.

An awakened haruhi would be a hell of an opponent, but she's a mostly benign entity interested in her own enjoyment.

Compared to evil beings of similar power, say, Giygas.

Alright, I'm going to bed.

Try not to insult any more of our friends. Also try to avoid any accidental anal intrusions.

I say accidental because Erica might be into that sort of thing.

Most likely is.

>>18811991
With her latent power even a simulation of her could be dangerous.

rolled 62 = 62

Goddammit house sitting so nowhere near a taco truck, too drunk to drive.
lifesucks.jpg

rolled 51 = 51

>>18812054
We were only talking ill about Perrine to get Raj to reveal himself. We didn't actually mean any of it.

>>18812063

At least your country even has something as cool as a "Taco Truck".

Fucking Australia. Impossible to get good Mexican food here.

>>18812058
Haruhi has majaik in a no-majaik simulation. . .

Oh, that would be a gigantic bowl of horse shit with sprinkles on top.

>>18812101
She could have pulled a No-Majaik Law of God bullshit in the simulation
I doubt that is beyond her abilities

>>18812081
Yeah, because LG would TOTALLY never have that to come back and bite us in the ass.

rolled 53 = 53

>>18812098
I guess you are right.
Also i can get it as hangover cure tomorrow anyway, because nothing cures a hangover like taco truck.

rolled 70 = 70

>>18812133
I'm not saying it won't. Just that our intentions were pure.

>>18812133
>have that to come back
Wow, I'm on a fucking roll tonight.

>ridah lead pipe.

YOu quickly unclinch the pipe you kept at your belt and use it to fight off the spar of wood R is using as a weapon.

Steel clashed agains wood as he continued to rabble on,
"SHE WILL MAKE ALL OUR WISHIES COME TRUE! SHE WILL SAVE US! SHE IS THE ONE TRUE GOD!"

Having had enough of his crazy talk, you smash his weapon with your own.
The old wood proving rotten enough to break easily.

He throws a desperate elbow, and it connects with the side of your helmet, tearing it off..

"Wait... You're not Gai." Erica comments as she sees the face under the mask.

>>18812268
WHAT

WHAT

>>18812268
oshitwat

>>18812268
OHSHIT!

>>18812268

...huh. Okay.

>>18812268
Inb4 End of thread

>>18812268
CANNON IS FIRED!

rolled 11 = 11

>>18812268
I have no response for the wat and rage.

>>18812268
READY THE CANONS

>>18812268
BRACE FOR IMPACT

>>18812268
Would Gai have been in his Rider outfit in class, instead of the IDPKB trainee uniform?

rolled 52 = 52

>>18812340
He frequently is in Rider mode.

>>18812340
He wears his armor all the time, he just hangs the blazer off his shoulders like a badass.

>>18812340
Yes. It was point made in the early threads that Gai almost always wore his Rider costume during class.

>>18812345
>>18812351
>>18812355
Guess I just forgot, then.

its naru

>>18812268
Yes I am. My magically enhanced good-looks just don't work here.

You quickly roll to retrieve and put on your helmet, making sure she sees nothing more.

"Who are you?" She asks.
"Eyes front, we need to take him out." you tell her.

She lets loose another barrage of rubber bullets.
"THIS IS ALL AN ILLUSION! ITS ALL IN OUR HEADS! HARUHI WILL SAVE US FROM THIS WAKING DREAM!" He says as the rubber bullets bounce mostly harmlessly off him.

You wind up for another kick, hoping that this one will finish the bastard.

You run, jump and extend your foot.
It connects squarely with his chest ans sends him reeling over the low railing.
He grabs your leg and doesnt let go.
He begins to fall.

**ROLL TO NOT FALL OFF THE FUCKING PENIS TOWER**

rolled 41 = 41

>>18812435
Goddammit!

rolled 50 = 50

>>18812435
A FUCKING Penis Tower?

GRAB THE VAGINA LIPS!

rolled 14 = 14

>>18812435
Hayate's_Secret_brother_prevent_death_technique!

rolled 35 = 35

>>18812435
RIDER FLY

rolled 42 = 42

>>18812435

Don't fall GAI!

rolled 93 = 93

>>18812435
Riders don't fall, they only RIDER KICK the ground.

rolled 11 = 11

>>18812435

rolled 56 = 56

>>18812435
/tg/dice, if you screw this up for us, I will hunt down the 4chan servers and douse them in diet coke.

rolled 44 = 44

>>18812450
The dice don't like me calling for flight, I guess.

>>18812454
>>18812450
>>18812445
>>18812444
>Those fucking rolls.
He pulls you with him as gravity takes hold of the two of you, the edge moving further and further away.

You try and grab the railing but its too late.

>>18812475
FUCK!
6th roll was a 93!
Are you taking only the best of the first 5?

rolled 72 = 72

>>18812506
Could be he's doing it again, yeah.

rolled 2 = 2

>>18812506
Or the 93 cancelled out the 14.

rolled 28 = 28

>>18812435
indeed

stop wasting rolls you lunatics.

You regain full use of your senses just in time to see R take Gai with him over the edge.

You sprint, hoping to make it in time.
Diving onto the floowrand extending your arm through the railing, you catch the tips of Gai's gloves just in time.

R is still holding onto him, trying to pull him down.
"DEATH TO NON-BELIEVERS! A GLORIOUS HEAVEN AWAITS ME!"
Gai kicks R to make him let go.

Thier actions are making you lose your grip.
Hina and Erica get to your side to assist you in trying to pull them up.

R looks up and see's that 3 agents are now trying to reel him in.
He lets go.
"FUCK THE POLICE!" he screams as he plummets.

He crashes into a pile of trash built up behind the tower.
You see no further movement as you pull Gai up.

As you get Gai back onto the roof, you hear Erica ask him, "Just who exactly are you?"

rolled 30 = 30

>>18812559
Nope.

>>18812573
And there's the 93

>>18812573
"What do you mean, Erica? It's Gai.
"More importantly, we need to get down there and get R into custody, dead or alive."

>>18812573
Is that not Gai? Erica we can deal with these questions once we hunt down R, we need to get him or at the very least his body into custody.

>>18812573

>He crashes into a pile of trash built up behind the tower

an eagle passes by over you
for some unknown reason your body stars walking unto the edge, your arms spread downward at your side. you let gravity take over and go with the flow..... and then.....

ASSASSINS CREED BITCHES

"I don't know what you mean, Erica-san" Gai says as he takes his helmet off as if to get some fresh air.
"I... What." Erica could only say.

"Okay guys, lets quickly head down and find R, he could be dead or seriously injured. Either way, He's not getting very far with that fall." You tell your team.

You back trace the route Gai and Hina used to get to the roof and quickly make your way down the tower.

*give me a roll*
taking first one

rolled 7 = 7

>>18812694
Tracking him down!

>>18812700
GODDAMMIT LOOKOUT

rolled 16 = 16

>>18812694
Oh goddammit, we're going to fail.

rolled 73 = 73

/tg/ dice shall fail us as always

>>18812694
>>18812700
>playing dota 2
>feeding scrubs make me want to kill myself
>alt-tab to MSQ
>this post
Hmm.

rolled 12 = 12

>>18812700
Fuck's sake.

LG, can we use a fate point to reroll?

rolled 25 = 25

Tonight's RNG seed is a fucking piece of shit.

>>18812694
>ouch

As you run out of the building, the other ninja that was with Bob and Naru runs up to you.
"Boss! It's Naru! She's down!" he tells you, panting.
He points to a crowd forming around something near the tower's base.

In the distance, you hear the sounds of an ambulance approaching.

WAT DO?
[ ]prioritize R
[ ]prioritize Naru
[ ]other.

>>18812741
WAT. WTF HAPPENED?

>OTHER
Send the others after R, we go to Naru's side

>>18812741

We will attend to Naru. Have Gai and Erica go for R.

>>18812741
[x]other
Hayate and Erica go to Naru.
Gai and Hina go secure R.
If he need to be hit again, Hina's wooden sword will do more damage.

>>18812741
Gai, Erica and ninja's to R

Hina and us to Naru

Poor girl just got landed on I expect

>>18812741
Do what >>18812770 said

>>18812741
[x] R
Mission first.

>>18812777
But R landed in trash, not on Naru.
I'm betting it's K.

>>18812777

Oh. Oh GOD. You're right. You must be.

She will die in our arms.

Her last words will be her apologizing for damaging the ears we entrusted to her.

GOD DAMMIT.

>>18812741
Is it really an option?

[X] Naru

For some reason, a really bad thought came to mind.

Hayate: Naru! Are you alright?

Naru: *Coughs* My lord... Y-your target is getting away... Leave me.

Hayate: How could I do that? Hold on, we'll get you fixed up!

Naru: ...At least... I protected the bunny ears for you...

Hayate: No! Don't say that! Y-you're going to be okay! You're going to be okay, damnit!

*Cue death in his arms and more PTSD coming to surface*

rolled 41 = 41

>>18812741
I'mma say Us and Hina see to Naru, Gai, Erica, and the Ninjas go for R.

R dropped down a few stories and most likely broke some bones at least.
Even if he gets away, he won't get far.

Naru, on the other hand, is our local guide. Without her, our chances of finding K are almost zero. Especially with where we're going.

It's a tactical, professional decision to maximize the probability of mission success.
It just also happens to look like us caring more about Naru than the mission.

rolled 19 = 19

>>18812830
Which is why at least half of the team continues after R.

[x]prioritize R

this is a mission, failing it could prove bad for us on the eyes of the bureau, worse kick us out as an agent

Naru is no more than a data on a super computer.

>>18812830
You forget he is a rogue agent and may well be using majaik

>>18812837
Wheatley! Aren't you busy getting Hayate in KY?

>>18812837
Wheatley? What are you doing here? Are you lost?

>>18812838
Not without making his device light up like a fucking Christmas tree and making him much easier to track.

>>18812741
[x] Send Erica, Gai, and half the ninjas to where R should be, take Hina and the other half of the ninjas to see to Naru.
>>18812796
Next time you have a bad thought, keep it to yourself so LG doesn't get any ideas.

Rolling just to keep track of the results. I feel like something's kinda off tonight. We seem to be getting a lot of low to very low rolls.

>>18812838
This is a NO MAJAIK setting, where majaik is limited. He doesn't have any of his powers.
If he did, he would have used his Device by now.

>>18812869
>We seem to be getting a lot of low to very low rolls.
It's the seed that the RNG for the dice roller is using. It's a bad seed because it's based on time.

>>18812874
>>18812864
We aren't allowed to use majaik and he is sprung already

He knows he is screwed by this point it is just a matter of whether he thinks he can get away by using his majaik or contact his remaining agent and plan something

rolled 72 = 72

>>18812837
Treating our local go-to as expendable is both out-of-character and tactically unsound.

>>18812869
After all that explaining for why I was rolling, I forgot to actually roll.

Experiment time.

>>18812907
LG, could please clarify if NO MAJAIK simply means that majaik use is restricted, or if it means that most majaik won't work.
Because we seem to have a bit of miscommunication among the players.

rolled 34 = 34

>>18812884
You've said something interesting. Explain further please.

>>18812908
Continuing the experiment.

>>18812926
The /tg/ dice roller uses a pseudo-random number generator, which uses the current time as a seed for its number generation. As such, it's not truly random.

rolled 41 = 41

playing wot, come back to msq.
Wat

>>18812869
I can't, they're all so interesting.

rolled 89 = 89

>>18812908
just because you said it.

>the other ninjas arent here yet, you only have Bob and one other guy.
>6 checked out the ravers
>4 returned the carts to the racers

"Hey you, uhhhhm.." YOu try and remember his name
"BIll, sir." he tells you.
"Yes, Bill, go with Gai and Erica to check out where our target fell, We'll take care of Naru."
"Yes sir." He says with an awkward salute.

Gai, and the other two run around behind the building.
You and Hina push your way through the crowd.

You see Naru laying there, Bob tending to her as best as he could.
There's a large gash on her shoulder that you surmise is the result of the blood stained, half crushed cinder block near her feet.

"Naru, Are you alright?" You ask as you get to her side.
She winces, trying to hide the pain.
"Yes My Lord, But I must apologize, I messed these up." She shows you the now dirty bunny ears that are on the ground.

"That's not important anymore." You tell her as you take over for Bob, checking her injuries.
"We need to get you some medical attention."

An ambulance pulls up nearby, the sirens dispersing the crowd.

"N-not the hospital My Lord." She objects as she struggles to get up.
"Not there."

WAT DO OH MASTER BUTLERS?
[ ]force her to go to the hospital.
[ ]ask why
[ ]run away from the medics