also in after panzer fuckers

>>18771963

THAT'S NO PLANE!

>101 1st company

Is that numbering system correct? Also, isn't SWQ running in like 5 minutes?

Anyways: Reading up on the old thread, be in soon.

>ask the blonde

>>18771963

Hmmm... DON'T ask for directions. We know where we're going

In b4 Panz-oh wait.

>>18771993
SWQ is on canceled this week due to Finals/work.

>>18771963
It begins...

Crazy Ivan!

FINALLY YOU MAGNIFICANT BASTARD!
FINALLY I CAN SHOW THE FRUITS OF MY EFFORTS!

>>18771993
Eheheheheheeheh. Also Panzer. Remember my advice. Eheheheheheheheh.

>>18771993
Planefag said no SWQ tonight.

>>18771963
Ask the blonde.
We've got an aide for a reason!

>>18771963
>Ask the blond

>>18771993
Derp I'm retarded. Oh well. We finally get to play with tanks!

>Ask the blond

"Pardon me. which way to he barracks? I can't remember a damn thing. Too much booze at the promotion party."

Are we man or woman? Magical or mundane? Is our aide a witch or not?

>>18771993

Flugzeughomosexuelle, I mean planefag has to actually do homework and actual work in order to graduate, I have decided to bounce his timeslot and claim it for my own (today)
And the 101th division 1st company

Ask the lady. She is our aide, after all.

>Ask the blond

Where the fuck am I, where the fuck do I go, and who the fuck are you?

>>18772021
>>>/reddit/

Fuck off.

>>18771963
Ask the blonde for directions. We're a tank jockey not one of those fucking fighter pilots who are so full of arrogance and hot air that they don't need a plane to fly, just a stiff wind and a pin. We are willing to ask for directions and follow orders, sometimes.

But wait, if we're on an entirely different base now, we can't have Minnapup wars!

>Ask the aide where to go

>>18772035
And can I fuck you?

>>18772032
>101th
>101th
>101th

>>18772036
why don't you fuck off we made that

>>18772049
Are we that hung over still?

>>18771963
>Ask

>>18772040
>Implying

>>18772064
FLYING TANKS GO IN FEET FIRST!

IT BEGINS
ASK THE BLONDE

101st were paratroopers....oh fuck

also

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7uTAIpU0sa0

its a crime not to play this song

>Remember you suck at writing a-
Oh wait.
>Don't ask for directions
We don't need directions where we're headed.

>>18772072
We're in the army. Being hung-over is a way of life for us.

I can dig it.

>>18772111
so were going to be jumping out of planes that are easy prey...lets do this

>No directions
Pretty easy to find a group of young girls wearing no pants

>Where the fuck am I, where the fuck do I go, and who the fuck are you?
"You are Colonel Kent of the newly formed 101st Panzerhexe Lehr division, the best troops, training, and equipment that earth can provide. I don't know if I should be offended, you calling me your aide? You don't even remember your old friend? I guess somebody at your age can get away with faulty memory. They are probably milling about in the mess hall or maybe in the hangars.."

Enough fog has cleared from your eyes to see that it is indeed an old friend, one you even served with in France during the blitz. God it is good to see the Major again..

>What now?
(sorry for the slowness, but tanks travel at 30kph where planes go at 300kph~)

>>18772032
>>18772064
GOD DAMMIT, I GOT IT RIGHT IN MY FIRST POST, BUT NOT IN MY SECOND, feeling really twitchy... and yes, 101st

>>18772160

To the mess! Tanks don't move with out fuel, so neither will Tankwitches!

>>18772160
Mess Hall.
We need coffee. And lots of it.

>>18772160
>somebody at your age can get away with faulty memory.
How old ARE we?

>>18772160
One get dressed. Two start heading to the mess. Three 'Did you just call me old?!'

>>18772160
Sorry Major, hungover and tired. Shall we adjourn to the mess hall and get some of the swill that barely deserves the name coffee?

>Ask the blond

>>18772160
You'd better not make me need to get some blood on my risers motherfucker.
INSPECT THE TROOPS

>>18772184
>>18772208
Are we English? Shouldn't it be tea?

>>18772160
Find some damn coffee.

Time to inspect the troops

>>18772240
Given the Webley, I'm assuming we are.

>>18772240
Let's be some proper british chaps and find the strongest tea we can find

>>18772240
Oh yeah, we have a Webley. Irish Breakfast tea or some other strong Assam.

>>18772160
Acquire grub. It will help us get our thoughts and memory in order. Also if we are old does that mean we can't shit up the quest with waifu faggotry?

>>18772254
>>18772257
>>18772259
Alright, tea it is!
Unless our quartermaster is a Yank and he got more coffee at the cost of tea.

>>18772160
>Name is Kent
>Colonel
>Have a Webley
>Major Miles
>...
>Lehr division

Oh thank god for a second there I thought we'd be stuck in a fucking Matilda or some shit.

Fucking early war British tanks

>Panzerhexe Lehr

I think we're German.

TO THE MESS! Loads of coffee, and let's get a good look at the witches we'll be leading, and let them get a look at us.

Important to recognize your people, after all.

Where is the enemy? I need to hit something with my sword damnit! On that note, where is my sword?
>'Sword' being, of course, our beloved tank, a Tiger 2. Note that I know shit about WW2 tanks and just picked one at random.
>Inspect tank

>>18772262
Hell no!
We can still do that! We just have to be a little more, ahem, selective with our waifus!

>>18772160
Inspect troops, inspect OUR TANK(S), OUR GLORIOUS TANK(S)!

>>18772319
We could always go after Wilma...
Or maybe she'll go after us...

>>18772301
You randomly picked the most badass (if unsustainable) tank of the war. Congratz.

>>18772301
Fuck the Tiger II, it's a piece shit fraught with mechanical problems, an engine too small for it and it's ammunition explodes on the FUCKING INSIDE!!!

Either a Panther or one of the Tank Destroyers/Hunters is what I'd go for.

>>18772336
We are Jagdpanther goddammit...
And we hate you...

>>18772251

If that is our outfit, tactical facepalm inbound...

>>18772336
Tiger 1 or a panzer

Though Jagdpanther master race is the best option that will not be picked

>>18772257
>>18772242
>>18772240
>>18772208
"Well, I could go for some tea... And did you call me old?"

"Yes. I am in my twenties, you aren't. I hear that Jerry makes good coffee, especially at this time of day. Watch out though, one of the witches is vicious..." Mile's trails off.. " I am needed elsewhere though, so I will leave you too it. Need to go to Gloucester for a command meeting. Good luck, you will need it."

>Oh boy here we go

>>18772359
I'm sure there's enough people who would vote for one of the Panthers.

>>18772336
Seconding panther if we actually get a choice.

>>18772336
>Playing on Easy mode

Bitch, Get on my level

>>18772380
MOTORCYCLE IS FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCKED

Posting in Panzer's thread. Disbelieving this is happening.

>>18772370
>Major Miles

Open talked tank....

Fucking.....

Fucking great engineering

rolled 2 + 4 = 6

>>18772398
Rolling to disbelieve the illusion

Fuck all of your shit. Get on my level, nerds.

>>18772370
>[lolspoilers] I wonder if she still lost her entire unit against the Germans in this timeline... [/loltgspoilers

>>18772370

Where the hell is room for her legs in those things?

On topic, a Jagdpanther is cool too. Really, as long as it will reliably kill aliums at over 1 km out, I'm happy with it.

This is what we will drive, Ja?

>>18772456
>Where the hell is room for her legs in those things?
Uh...magic?

>>18772422
...you are aware that those were little more than remote control mines right...
We do want to enjoy our retirement? Right? Right?

>>18772457
>posting a leichttraktor
I like you.

>>18772422
>Not Using a Wagon

Pfft, what a scrub

>>18772359
I'm cool with the Tiger I, it's a pretty amazing tank. Though I am of the opinion that the Panzer V/ Panther is the single greatest tank to come out of WWII. The Jagdpanther is pretty much a Panther with a bigger gun stuck to it so I'm beyond completely alright with this.

The T-34 has an absurdly good cost to effectiveness ratio and is worthy of all the respect we can give it, we're likely to see a large number of those.

If due to our Britishness we're forced to use a UK tank I'll be sad though I suppose I could live with a Comet or Cromwell. A Firefly would be kinda funny as well.

>>18772479
17pdr SP Achilles

Hipster's Firefly

>>18772479
NO. WE ARE NOT HAVING A T-34.

>>18772370
Have we actually been put in command of witches? Witches whom we'd have to keep from killing and/or fucking each other every day? Whom we'd have to clean up after and deal with the brass for? We'd hate the little cunts within the week.
That would be awesome. It'd be like Minna's job, except done well. Especially if we're a proper British chap with a big mustache. We could keep them in line with morning calisthenics and constant training.

>We need the derp gun.

>>18772479
Well depending on Panzerhexen's attitude on anachronisms and on the year this is happening, a Jagdpanther (1944) might not be available. We might manage a Firefly (or an IS-2, if russian tanks are ok). My vote would go for a Firefly or a Cromwell, though, German tanks are the boring choice.

>>18772508
>morning calisthenics

>>18772508
Oh man I hope we've got our standard issue Desert Rat brand shorty-shorts.

>>18772508
I'm thinking this looks like a split command between us and Miles, seemingly with us commanding the conventional tankers.

>>18772504
I don't want one myself, I said we're likely to see them around.

This is a war against a major force, having something that is easy to mass produce and is still effective is necessary.

We might have guys under our command with them or something like that.

>>18772479
Have to agree with regards to the Panther. It was a fantastic tank.

With regards to british tank, the obvious choice is the churchill with flamethrower.
BURN THE ALIUMS

As you approach the mess you come across a British commando, at least someone dressed like half of one... The upper half that is. She hasn't noticed you yet as she is too busy having a smoke. She has short brown hair, a slim, but tall build (And a decent rack).

(I dont have images for all my witches so you guys will have to deal with it, as im no artist Have a jagdpanther witch)
>What do

Incidentally, where the fuck are we? Are we on the Continent (Spain? the Baltic or the Balkans? the USSR?), are we in Africa, are we in Britain?

I kinda doubt Tigers are available, what with Germany being all alium-occupied and shit.

Voting for Fireflies. We'll light up the night! (Hopefully not with our burning wrecks...)

>>18772559
Giver her our most british greetings

>>18772543
I like the way you think.

Having looked round a bit I remain of the firm belief we need a Tiger 2. We're attached to witches for crying out loud. Compared to their upkeep our tank would be peanuts even if we had a goddamn Ratte Landkreuzer.

>>18772559
Giver her our "britishest" greetings

>>18772559

pip pi cheerio, top of the morning to you jerry.

>>18772559
British Greetings. We cannot show weakness in front of the SAS.

>>18772568
>Sherman variant
>light up the night
Shhhh, Shermanator might come back.

>>18772559
>>18772559
>Watch out though, one of the witches is vicious

>>18772559
"Good morning, miss. Might you be able to direct me to the stables?"

>>18772559

PRESS ON. We need our morning coffee/tea/smoke.

Although we could bum a light off our new subordinate.

We're in command here, act like the CO we are.

>>18772559
Good morning to you miss. Such a lovely morning is it not. I am Colonel Kent of the 101st, may I have the pleasure of your name and a light?

>>18772585
>jerry
>british commando

Yeah, that would get us a punch in the face.

>>18772585
Jesus Christ. I lost it
I hope we are wearing a Pith Helmet.
An Original one, from the Zulu War

>>18772568
You are in England, the year is 0083... wait no wrong text, 1943~ stationed at Moreton Valence RAF, on the west side of England from eastchurch
(http://www.anti-aircraft.co.uk/airfieldmap.html)
>>18772526
What if Hitler wasn't in charge of spending the riech's money on stupid superhuge tanks and railwayguns? What if they actually gave money to people who wanted it? Think about it

>>18772585
Do you WANT a punch to the face? Or piss in our tea?

We're the CO now; the trolling target of every single soldier at this base.

>>18772559
Ask her how's she's doing, how the unit's doing, does she have a cigarette to spare, and what they're serving in the messhall.

>>18772627
They might build more actual tanks instead of stuff like the Jagdpanther? (Not saying its a bad machine, it's a great machine, but it's still a product of its times)

>>18772614

oh right.

'lass' then.

>>18772627

>What if Hitler wasn't in charge of spending the riech's money on stupid superhuge tanks and railwayguns? What if they actually gave money to people who wanted it? Think about it.

Tiger 2's that actually drive five miles without breakdowns?

Why, yes, I am obsessed with getting one. I'm in europe, so my time is limited and I really want one.

>>18772627
>1943 England

Firefly's our best bet then.

Shame, I really liked that upgunned M10

>>18772635
May you know my good chap that we are experts on the gentlemanly art of pugilism

>>18772627
>1943
So the churchill crocodile does exist

Have to vote for it.
Churchill VII base, so it is still armed with a 75mm main cannon.
Hull mounted machine gun is lost, but a Flamethrower is gained.
West side of britain, so the terrain is tending towards hills and valleys rather than marshland.

I am so getting in on this...

A Sherman tank would be choice.

Tiny, cheap, infinitely replaceable, and we could probably get three

>>18772627
>Tigers with proper diesel engines and sufficient materials and maintenance to run reliably.

Oh lawdy them aliums are right fucked now

>implying we get a tank
>implying this isn't a desk command
>implying this isn't Paperwork Quest

>>18772698
Court Martial for everyone!

>>18772690
Doenitz may be Navy, but he's not stupid, and neither is Speer. Hitler's little game of having the services compete against each other for material and research funds ended immediately after his death.

>>18772698
More like Fellate a Webley Quest

>>18772707

>I heard greeting her, I AM THE CONDUCTOR, TIME TO RAILROAD~
Lucky for you, you actually read the roster.
"Morning Captain..." (Well fuck, you cant remember WHICH WITCH captain it is...)
"Pine-coffin."
What...
"Captain Ruth Pine-coffin Para-witch. I will be serving in your third platoon Colonel." She says as she looks your way. ".... Yes. That is my last name."

"So whats for breakfast?"

"Some kraut is making it, and I'm not going though that again... I am going to go to sleep, had to escort transports all the way here from Portsmouth..."

And with that, she walks away, tossing the butt of her cigarette over her shoulder

>>18772740
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Richard_Geoffrey_Pine-Coffin

>>18772635
That's what happens when some ruffian try to fight us, my good sir

Holy shit. Panzer actually started his quest. I thought he was just going to stand around talking about how he was going to do it forever.

>>18772740
OY! THATS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO A SUPERIOR OFFICER LASSIE! NOW GET YOUR CRUMPET BACK HERE AND MAKE MY TEA YA BINT!

I REALLY FEEL LIKE I'M READING A POST ON GAIA

FIX YOUR SHIT PANZER

( ◕‿◕)
( ◕‿◕)
( ◕‿◕)

>>18772740
>your third platoon
Could someone break down the command structure here? How many platoons are there in a company, and why would there be both tanks and paratroopers?

>>18772740
Kraut breakfast?
Eh. As long as the tea is strong enough, it doesn't matter.

>>18772740
How do para-witches work?

>>18772769
they're tankwitches. they probably are paratroop tanks.

>>18772740
"Wooden box"

Oh lordy, the puns.

>>18772707
You need to learn to relax and go with the flow of things.

I don't feel we are British enough Panzerhexen

Oh well, we will deal with that ruffian later, let's get our morning tea

>>18772782
>>18771963
>>18772147
>>18772096
OH GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWD

>>18772777
I assume something like this

>>18772769
Something like five to six platoons I think is in a company.

>>18772740

Alright! Clearly we need to put coffin-witch on the list for whipping into line. But first, BREAKFAST! By which I mean coffee.

At least one pot of coffee.

Minimum.

Fuck no wonder I have headaches constantly.

>>18772782
So are we gonna see a genderflipped Winters?

I'm somewhat iffy about this.

>>18771963

>You go put on your service dress
>service dress
>dress

wait a minute

>>18772821
who was he again?

>>18772831

Figure of speech. Relax. We male.

>>18772370
>those joints

So do they get on their knees to advance or something? That has to be murder on the legs.

>>18772831
Nah, it means "Best duds".

Like "Service Dress Blues".

>>18772831
"Dress" is military speak for uniform.

>>18772841
Naw, they actually don't touch the ground, the treads don't need contact, it's just a focusing mechanism for them to tank it up an inch or so above the ground.

>>18772831
Dress Uniform, I'd assume.

>>18772791
You wouldn't happen to have the unedited version of that, would you?

>>18772740

WE SEEK GLORIOUS CAFFEINE!

It is by will alone I set my mind in motion. It is by the grace of tea that the thoughts acquire speed, the pot acquires stains, the stains become a warning. It is by will alone I set my mind in motion.

>>18772814
We're British. We drink tea.
But yes, we're gonna get these girls in line with gruff mustachioed charisma and a pith helmet.
And morning calisthenics. Can't forget those.

Stuff we need to know:

- Our waifu: What kind of tank are we driving and what is her condition?
- What's the order of battle of our command?
- Where are we?
- WHEN are we?

But most importantly right now, how to respond?
I vote:

"Uncouth little lady..." but not making anything of it.

>>18772852
I always kinda thought that they just balanced on the point of the bottom road wheel... if those... had road wheels... anyways, kinda like roller blades with engines and treads instead of wheels.

>>18772850

'dress uniform'. 'service uniform'. not 'service dress'

we tits now.

but im fine with it. we can waifu for Otto Skorzeny or something.

>>18772872
>Where are we?
>WHEN are we?
>>18772627

HOLY CRAP I MISSED IT?
I've got some reading to do.

(sorry bout the spelling, punctuation, and all that zazz, having an anxiety attack, just... deal with it for now)
>>18772740
As you enter the mess, you smell only the sweet sweet smell of coffee, which offends your tea-drinkery-self to the core. As you prepare your tea, you look around and see four bodies in black German-issue panzertruppen uniforms, and one in a light blue uniform that you don't recognize right away, all sitting at one table eating what looks to be a basic breakfast of eggs and toast.

>What do

>Tank Witches Quest starts less than a week before I head to Armour school for the next half year

Not sure if coincidence, but this is awesome.

And you know what, we should be in a GRANT. Because shenanigans.

>>18772910
Go greet them.
So what exactly is the light blue?
French?

>>18772832
>http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Richard_Winters
US Paratrooper.
Go read Band of Brothers. Or if your a total pleb, watch it.

>>18772910
Get ourself a plate of breakfast. Wander over to their table and sit down by the five strangers. Introduce ourself, eat breakfast, drink tea, talk shop.

Are they men or women?

>>18772910

When we have downed enough tea/breakfast to be fully functional, we need to find the people who serve directly under us. Then we shall have them gather the troops for an inspiring speech!

>The martians may have landed in England, they may have pushed us off the continent, but we shall prevail! By our strength of arms, and the grace of god, we shall drive them from these shores, and back to whence they came! etc.

We should maybe start setting up some integration exercises/wargames.

Paaaaaaint bullets?
Paint bullets.

>>18772910

well, best to be our comerades.

go siddaown and start eating.

>>18772937
Wasn't the Major in light blue (even though we know her uniform fairly well, right?)

Also
>Run generic morning greeting program

>>18772910
General greetings, try and find the morale and readiness state of the troops, opinions on being attached to a mixed unit, that sort of thing. And the mess hall is perfect for that.

>>18772938
>Remember when I heard about him passing.
R.I.P Major

>>18772910
I thought it was German "food." I didn't think they had eggs and toast for breakfast. Anyway, get our grub on and then go offer them mustache rides. We do have a big bushy mustache, right? I mean we're a British officer, ffs. We have to.

>>18772910
Food now.
Talk later.

>>18772910
Isn't the Company Commander dining with the enlisted generally not done?
Especially amongst British forces?

>>18772910
Fetch them each a cuppa tea.
"No issues eating with a colonel is there?"
Time to give those krauts some english hospitality they obviously weren't getting from their foreign witches, and country.

>>18772910
Get food, sit with strangers, don't introduce ourselves.

We're a colonel. If anything, most of the strangers should be the ones doing the introductions.

>>18773000
Who said they're enlisted?
We've already met a captain. Wouldn't surprise me if most of the witches under our command are only a couple ranks lower than us.

>>18772910
>How many eggs can we fit in a Sherman?

ROIGHT.

FOOD.

Maybe propah British hospitality.

>>18772841
Actually, in the original work their legs were never 'inside' the Striker units, they phased through the magic circuit into the ether; the striker was physically bonded to the witch and became a physical extension of her.

Early art for even the Flying strikers had articulated Knees. It's just one more thing that got redacted in the anime adaptation to streamline things.

>>18772859
Yeah, it was in one of Fumikane's artbooks.

>>18773029
I don't know, but on the bright side if it goes up like a firecracker, like Shermans do, sure we'll be dead but the people who find our body will get some nice fried eggs.

>>18772926
This man has a good head on his shoulders

>>18772982
You were expecting maybe potatoes?

>>18773069
... Get the net gentlemen. She will not escape this time.

>>18773022
I concede that they may be officers. But the description was vague enough that we don't even know their gender, let alone their rank.

Let's just sit down and start eating, without saying anything then.

Map of roughly where we are, for those who are interested.

>>18773089
Hell we don't even know OUR gender.

>>18773160
Both.

>>18773082
So, I dunno if you saw in that other thread, but will there be a planeswalker quest thread today?

>>18773152

staging for an invasion of ireland are we?
well good, bout time someone put the paddies down.

we should get an orange armband.

>>18773178
I started one, right at 6:00 pm chan time, but no one replied.

>>18773160

WE are a propah OFFISAH, with a stiff upper lip and a manly MOUSTACHE upon it.

You question why a German cook would make only eggs and toast... Now that you think about it, you have no idea what they even eat other the sauerkraut and schnitzel... What the hell is schnitzel anyways? Why do you ask non-rhetorical questions to yourself? You grab a plate, fill it full of delicious eggs* n toast, and head over to the table.

As you get closer, you can see insignias from this range,(and the lack of clothing on the bottom half), two Captains and a trio of Leftenants

"May I sit with you ladies?" you ask.

"You outrank all of us Colonel, you can do whatever you like" one says. You couldn't tell who it was with all the food chewing and whatnot.

>Talk to which witch?
>Captain with a light build, short black hair, green eyes, pale skin
>Captain with an athletic build, again, short black hair and blue eyes
>Lt with an average build, supreme frontal protection, Auburn hair and blue eyes
>Lt with another athletic build, shoulder length platinum-blonde hair and blue eyes ( I swear not everyone has blue eyes)
>Lt with smaller build, blonde hair and green eyes (pic somewhat related, as you get closer you see it is a Finnish army uniform)

>>18773224
>Leftenant

>>18773224
Does the finnish even have decent tank?
Oh well, ask Everyone's name

>>18773082
We're in agreement.
We're losing valuable potato supplies to that little flying thief, and the Irish soldier's morale is in the toilet. Even with pantsless girls flying overhead all the time!
So, we're an English Colonel of his queens army in command of the 101 1st Company, which includes witches.
We're at least over 30+ but it is yet to be determined. We've taken part in World war 1, (which at the time we called international rowdy rustle) and likely several brush wars. We carry our trusty Webley revolver which has as many stories as we have toes (at least 9, old training mishap that, funny story)

How do we handle the little girls tearing around in their strikers when we still believe in the use of good old fashioned infantry?

>>18773224
The Finn

rolled 2 = 2

>>18773224
nokodice for a random selection.

>>18773224

sit and eat in silence.

>>18773224

The FINN! Oh please let Simo be armored cav in this universe. Tanksniping. Tanksniping everywhere!

Hell even if it isn't, the Finn sounds interesting.

>Captain with an athletic build, again, short black hair and blue eyes
She is obciously the dominant one.

* I was going to say if you made a how many eggs we can fit into x joke, I would murder you, but both the thread AND irc beat me to the punch

>>18773224
>Lt with smaller build, blonde hair and green eyes (pic somewhat related, as you get closer you see it is a Finnish army uniform)

Finns are cool.

>>18773262

*stern silence not nervous silence.

>>18773224
>eggs*
>*
We're gonna eat that?

>>18773224
ALL RIGHT CHAPS, I WANT YOUR NAMES. NEED TO KNOW WHO THE BLOODY HELL IS WHO, SO I KNOW WHO TO BLAME WHEN THEY BUGGER IT UP.

>>18773283
Becareful to not sound like a ruffian my good sir

>>18773224
>Lt with an average build, supreme frontal protection, Auburn hair and blue eyes
>Supreme frontal protection

HAH. I like.

>>18773224
>Lt with smaller build, blonde hair and green eyes (pic somewhat related, as you get closer you see it is a Finnish army uniform)

About how she's coping with a mixed unit, if she'd worked with Germans during the Winter War (if we can judge age at all, maybe we can tell if it would be a gaffe to imply that she'd fought there...), general small talk and introductions.

>implying I'm not just trying to talk to the Finn

>>18773224
get names from all of em

>>18773205
ALSO, next thread, Friday at 6:00 PM chan time. Had a whole explanation for the soul binding written up and everything. And why it may end up biting you in the ass if you can't control it.

>>18773224
"Come now, you dont want to give a superior officer too much freedom, otherwise you might find me camping out in the lorry one day! Dohoho."
Toast, but no Jam?
What kind of war are we fighting here? Where the bloody 'ell is the strawberry?

>>18773224
>Captain with light build
"Could you introduce me to your compatriots, Captain?"

>>18773224
>leftenant

I like the cut of your jib, son.

>>18773316
>Where the bloody 'ell is the strawberry?
Probably the same fate that befell the muskmelons: Aliums.
Fucking Aliums.

>>18773294
RUFFIAN? HOW DARE YOU IMPLY THAT SIR! SABERS AT DAWN! NOW WHERE IS MY TEA?

>>18773329
Butter then? They havent killed off the cows i hope?
I hear margarine's nice.

>>18773328
Bunch of silly tossers.
>>18773334
Very well, good sir. But i have to inform you that i'm an expert on the Gentlemanly Art of Bartitsu

>>18773371
>I hear margarine's nice.
You heard wrong.

>>18773398
GENTLEMANLY! BAH! REAL GENTLEMEN DO FLAMETHROWERS AT FIVE PACES. KEEPS THE OLD REFLEXES UP.

>>18773251
We're not old enough to have been in WWII, even if we're like 35, we'd be around 10 when the war ended.
>>18773224
Captain with the Athletic build, let's start by getting to know this groups commanding officers before we move on to the others.

>>18773429

POPPYCOCK! Flamethrowers at five paces is an modern affectation!

TRUE GENTLEMEN duel in zepplins at dawn!

>>18773224
>Finn Tank Witch

... is that Aurora?

Yo, Panzer, just stopping in real quick, can't stay.

REMEMBER: TEARS ARE YOUR SUSTENANCE

>>18773429
Oh you're one of those fellows who fought at the great war who used Flamethrowers right?
Bunch of cowards.
Real gentlemans fight with only Trench Shovels.
Bring your best shovel, we meet at the field of HONOR

>>18773483
>>18773451
>>18773429


PFAUGH. None of you has any concept of the TRUE way a Gentleman settles his differences!

Homoerotic Wrestling.

>>18773205
Yeah, unfortunate that I was working in the lab at the time.

In general, I'd like names, so that we can call people something other than their ranks. Maybe a quick background for each: nationality, a brief combat record, and their thoughts on working in a composite unit.

>>18773483
Trench shovels?
I think you must be daffy, get nicked with one of those after they'd been digging all that and you'll catch your death from illness!

Wash your hands of that mess, and then step for with arms raised, we only need bare knuckles to settle this conflict!

I think someone chrecked our panzer

>>18773538
Fine, i accept your challenge.
We will use the classical way of the pugilism to settle our differences.
I meet you at the gentleman's field of battle:
Wrestlemania

>>18773253
You effortlessly slide into a seat next to one of the captains, the pale one.

" How are you dealing with a mixed unit love?" you say as you look across the table at the Finn, who finishes chewing and swallows.

"Less Russians then I expected. I just wish we had a looker like you in Heeresgruppe Nord. Would have improved witch morale." She replies. She goes to wiggle her eyebrows when she is jammed in the ribs with the elbow of the Kraut with das assets.

"The colonel is out of your league Ilta. I'm Lt Klara Knispel. Beside me here.." she nudges the Finn again" Is Lt Lita Ilomäki. Captain Barkmann is on your left flank, Captain Wittmann on your right.. And..." Klara starts to rub her temples. "And last but not least is our own Lt Ema Tarcazy, our local Hungarian.~"

"I am impressed Knispel, you managed to remember something other then your own name!" Whittmann pipes up.

Almost immediately they get into a shouting match in German, after a few shouts, Whittman gets up, and leaves the hall.

"You better eat that while it's hot, eggs don't keep well and tea is horrible if cold."

Never in your life, have you heard a line delivered with such a lack of emotion, as if the witch was a god damn alien robot or something. You end up following the advice and drink down your tea n eggs.

>Wut now

>>18773304
Germans didn't back the Finns in the Winter War - that was when they still had the Molotov-Ribbentrop Pact going on. Continuation War, sure.

>>18773250
Buncha tanks they took from the Soviets, plus some old Vickers 6-ton tanks. They also had the BT-42, aka a BT-7 with a British howitzer in the turret.

>>18773557
I said fists
Not waving my arms and legs near you and making sounds as though i'd hit you.

If you wish to do so, Go right ahead, it'll only make the results of the duel easier for me.

>>18773579
>Drinking eggs.

First order of business is replacing the company cook.

>>18773579

Iiiintegration exercises?

Paaaaaint rounds for everyone!

>>18773589
You offend me, sir.
Fine, we will fight in a no holds barred brawler.
Bring your best fists.

>>18773579
Enjoy breakfast. Inspect our lady

>>18773579

were commander so we should do commander stuff.
make people do pushups.
make people clean latrines.
shit in the clean latrines.
pass out paperwork.
etc.

>>18773579
My, My.
We have quite the crew huh.What a bunch of ruffians.
We will discipline them, and make them the perfect soldiers

But now, we will enjoy on casuals conversations with some of the ladies

>>18773579
> consume eggs

Can't lead these bit-witches! Witches on an empty stomach, can we?

>>18773579
"D-Did you just advice an english gentleman how to enjoy his tea?" If we had feathers they'd be ruffled at the absurdity, but better excuse the Lt. for her ignorance."

Also it's a little shocking how forward these woman seem to be at judging us.
"I take it there is some bad blood between some of you? Now this war only has two fronts now, Us and the Aliums. I'd rather you either brush aside these concerns or go over them with me. I've been told i'm as good a listener as i am a storyteller."

When can we start saying Wot Wot as the end of things? The urge is great.

>>18773605
TOO BLOODY RIGHT. PLUS, YOU LITTLE SHITS ARE SPOILED. IN MY DAY, WE GOT DRY RATS, AND I HAD TO COOK THEM WITH A FLAMETHROWER, SO THEY TASTED LESS LIKE SHIT, AND MORE LIKE WOOD. IN THE TRENCHES, WHILE IT WAS RAINING, AND ARTILLERY WAS GOING OFF ALL AROUND. GOD I MISS THOSE DAYS. MADE ME FEEL ALIVE.

>>18773589
>>18773612
No seconds? What manner of duel is this?
And I believe you will find that the challenged gets to choose the venue and the time at which the duel will be held.
Procedure must be followed or all is lost.

>>18773579
>Wittmann

AW SHIT

>>18773697
Seconds are already implied my good sir.
but you're right, i've committed a mistake, not informing the venue.
The Buckingham Palace, 15:00, which i do believe it's not the hour you drink your tea right?

>>18773579
So we're a looker according to the Finn. Good to know.

Get to know them a bit better, see if we can assess their interpersonal relationships a bit so we can in the future keep them from rubbing each other the wrong way.

Get to know Barkmann better, we'll definitely want to be on good relations with the higher ranking one.

Tell Lita, aren't I a bit old for you love, not that I mind the attention.

We should be British but try to avoid going overboard with the Britishisms, we don't want to be a walking stereotype, it never pays well to be too predictable.

>>18773751
Correct, but 1500 is when i head to the local habberdashery and look at the new hats. Perhaps 1800? It gives me time to admire the hats as well as stop off at a small shop for some delightful cakes. I could pick one up for you before the fight, what do you prefer?

>>18773761
>Who wouldn't want them rubbing each other the wrong way.

>>18773683
>When can we start saying Wot Wot as the end of things? The urge is great.
I must admit, as a brit, I have never really understood why this stereotype is still believed...

>>18773751
>Implying that one such as yourself would be permitted to duel in the presence of his majesty

>>18773787
Would they have some strawberry cake?

Ah, you finally got around to it? I knew you had it in you.

Now then, let's hang out with Knispel for a bit. She seems pretty swell.

>>18773807
Long Patrol.
>>18773811
Aliums dont, dont you recall?

>>18773807
>Implying that an upstaging gentleman such as me wouldn't have the permission to have our duel be judged by the Queen herself

Surely you jest

>>18773807
>I must admit, as a brit, I have never really understood why this stereotype is still believed...
Same reason every Texan is a cowboy, every Georgian is a stupid hick, and every New Yorker was never taught the first thing about manners.
It's just more fun that way.

>>18773579
Which one delivered the line about the tea and eggs?
Barkmann? Tarcazy?

"Problems that I should be made aware of, leftenant?"

>>18773842
>upstaging
bloody hell, i beg your pardon for such stupid mistake

>>18773807

>O vermin if you dare, come and visit us someday,
>Bring all your friends and weapons with you too.
>You'll find a good warm welcome, let nobeast living stay,
>That cold steel was never good enough for you.

>You won't find poor helpless beasts all undefended,
>Like the old ones, babes and mothers that you've slain,
>And you'll find that when your pleasant visit's ended,
>That you'll never ever leave our shores again.

>All you cowards of the land and you flotsam of the sea,
>Who murder, pillage, loot, whene'er you please,
>There's a Long Patrol a waitin', we'll greet you cheerfully,
>You'll hear us cry Eulalia on the breeze.

>'Tis a welcome to the bullies who slay without a care,
>All those good and peaceful creatures who can't fight,
>But perlious and dangerous the beast they call the hare,
>Who stands for nought but honour and the right.

>Eulalia! Eulalia! Come bring your vermin horde,
>The Long Patrol awaits you, led by a Badger Lord!

>>18773579
So can anyone give me a quick note who each witch is supposed to be?

>>18773842
>Implying that King George IV is not currently on the throne
Given that you do not appear to know the name of our monarch, I do not believe I do

>>18773886
>King George IV
>Implying Queen's Victoria isn't our eternal queen

>>18773865
That's where I got my British stereotypes. RIP Author. who's name I forgot how to spell.

>>18773579
So, we've got Hauptmanner Barkmann and Wittmann, Oberleutnante Knispel, Yliluutnantti Ilomäki, and Főhadnagy Tarcazy.

I like Ilomäki already, but Barkmann or Knispel will probably be our go-to girls for infodumping. Maybe we should ask Barkmann for a translation of what just happened, since she wasn't directly involved in the argument.

>>18773886
>King George IV

Loyal anon, I am disappoint.

>>18773895

Brian Jaques. I didn't find out he died until sometime early this year. That was the first "famous person" death that really hit me, just because every bookstore I visited, there would be his books, and I would think back fondly to all the time I spent reading them....

And I didn't know he was dead for a whole year.

>>18773904
I stand corrected, I failed to catch this mistake of my own hand and as such I must bare my shame.

>>18773920
Me either, made me sad too. Kinda pumped for Overgrowth, since it gives me that Redwall feeling.

"Did you just tell me how to enjoy my tea Captain?" You turn to bring your gaze to bare upon her... And she isn't paying you any attention, as she is too busy "eating" these runny eggs..Ugh. "So Knispel was it? What bad blood is there between you and Wittmann? Now that we are fighting against the same foe, you will either need to deal with it. I don't want my own allies to sho.."

The Hungarian raises her hand "Don't worry about it, she has some problems on how lax chesty here can get when off duty, as well as the fact Knispel has alot more kills with the new Ausf E Panzer VI."

You go to reply, but you are at a loss for words..

"It's almost a ritual now. You will soon get used to it. I believe the rest of our unit is inspecting the striker bays, if you are done with your breakfast. Pardon my earlier advice Colonel; I did not mean to offend." Barkmann says in almost complete monotone.

"Guess I should go meet them. Thanks for the company. And Lita, love, I may be attractive, but I don't swing that way."

You get up from the table, walk into the kitchen, curse out the chef, and head towards the stikerba... Bloody hell, which hangar is the striker bay...

>Time to bugger off?
>Time to bugger off

>>18773954
>[x] time to bugger off

>>18773954

time to bugger off.

bugger off it is

>>18773954
Time to bugger off

>>18773954

>Let's bugger off!

>>18773954
Fuck, we are about as straight as a sailor in San Francisco

>>18773954
IT BEGINS

>>18773954
>And Lita, love, I may be attractive, but I don't swing that way.
Wait, so we ARE female?

>>18773954
>[x]bugger off fluffy tail

>>18773954
>"I may be attractive, but I don't swing that way."
As in too young or too foreign or too woman?
Dar say this could be the first time a quest made our sexual orrientation for us.
Almost as though, It wasnt a choice...

>>18773954
Time to bugger off and find our tank.

We'll give her a loving hug, and whisper sweet nothings in her turret.

I vote we name her Duchess or something like that, women are nice but she's our lady.

I don't think we're gay, I think we're just 30ish and she's in her late teens.

>>18773954
Wait, so we're gay or we have tits?

>>18773954
So, MC is canon gay?

Right?

>captcha: maiden accuracy

>>18773881
Wittman is Michael Wittman, Tiger Ace
Knispel is Kurt Knispel, Ace in almost every German tank of the war and top tank Ace of the war, and gives not a single fuck for recognition or authority and is basically the tank version of Erich Hartmann
Barkmann is Ernst Barkmann, Panther Ace
Ilomäki is Tiovi Ilomäki, Finnish Pak. 40 AT gunner
Tarcazy is Vitez Tarczay, Hungarian Tiger and possibly Panther Ace

These are some serious fucking hitters. We've got 3 out of the top 5 Panzer Aces at this table.

>>18773995

Are you going to Scarborough Fair?
Parsley, Sage, Rosemary, and Thyme.
Remember me to one who lives there,
For he once was, a true love of mine.

>We tits now

....So we are a witch too?

>in this thread, people fail to realise that 'swing that way' does not have to refer to gender

>>18774022
>>18774028
>>18774009
I don't think we're a chick, given that Lita called us eyecandy for the witches, and they're all surrounded by hot women we're a man, just one not interested in teenage girls.

>>18774044
Finnish witches are canon gay.

fuck I'll be right back, my Cat is being a cunt, crying on the roof and not afraid of anything

>>18774042

We... asexual now?

We don't date in the chain of command now?

>>18774044
But witches are lesbians.

>>18774052
inb4 panzer gets stuck on the roof

>>18774051
>>18774061
Not all of them and they already had plenty of eyecandy, being witches, surrounded by pantsless witches.

So we are gay then?

>>18774012
Damn, Knispel is some hot shit. Ilomäki is pretty awesome too. An AT gunner with 17 victories in one battle? Dayum.

If the genderswapped version wasn't a witch I'd consider it a waste of resources.

>>18774078
The jury is still out

>>18774052
inb4 panzer locks himself out

Ok, Panzer, I'm back...

>>18773954

>[x] bugger off

Panzer's brother just talked to us on IRC. He's stuck on the roof. Gonna be awhile before he gets down.

So for this quest, we get a name but not a gender? Acceptable

>>18774066
>>18774100
Wireless internet outside sucks, but I am back, writing now. Can somebody tell me how many posts we are at atm?

>>18774126

You know, that brings up an interesting question: Are non-witch females allowed in combat position?

Are we a witch who lost her powers after the whole 20-year-old limit?

>>18774141
295

>>18774141
298

Bump limit in two.

>>18774141
295

>>18774141
this is 299

>>18774150
Isn't bump limit 500 now?

>>18774148
If Panzer's in Planefag's universe, witches don't de-power at 20.

>>18774150
Bump is 500

>>18774148
20 year old limit does not exist in the planefag.panzer continuity

>>18774155
>>18774163

Nope, we sage now.

>>18774148
I'm pretty sure Panzer is running off of SWQ canon, so witches don't lose power with age.

>>18774161

Interesting...

>>18774170
Strange, was it not changed for /tg/?

PAAAAANZER

Aside from a pack of hardcore witches, and presumably some regular tanks, what else do we have? Attached Recon? Mech/Motorised Infantry? Attached AT/Artillery elements, Self-propelled or otherwise?

>>18774202
I have to actually wake up in the morning, so ill go 2~3 more posts then I'll go into FAQ mode mmk?

also
>Where do you bugger off too?
>There are still 5~6 witches unaccounted for~

>>18774231
Hmm to the bathroom to see what parts we have for one.

>>18774231
Bugger off to our tank. Need to make sure our lady is in good shape, we'll meet the rest of the witches after we spend some time with her.

>>18774231

>UNACCOUNTED FOR

THE WORST WORDS A COMMANDER COULD HEAR

FIND THEM

>>18774231

Bugger off to the HANGAR/GARAGE. We need to meet the beauties under our command. And I guess the rest of the witches too.

>>18774231
Get to the hangars to see the status of the strikers and tanks.

>>18774242
Indeed.

>>18774231
Buggah buggah buggah
To the motorpool, have to check out these new strikers for ourselves!
We're in command now, so we need to personally inspect our greatest fighting machines.

>>18774231
Find HER. You know who I'm talking about.

>>18774231
>unaccounted for
FIND THEM
FIND THEM IF YOU HAVE TO BURN DOWN ALL OF ENGLAND

>>18774242
I suppose Panzer telling us would suffice.
We need to know what equipment were working with,
and whether or not we need a rape whistle. Then again
We seem quite British so I doubt that will be an issue.

Other than that find those girls.

>>18774250
>>18774249
>>18774242
You head off towards Hangar 3, to where they keep your precious. You round the corner and see that the hangar contains many an armoured beast.

You spot it no problem. You shuffle over too it and rub it's side armor, painted the best colour, olive drab. Weighing in at 30 short tons, your she's a bit heavy. with 18ft 6 inches of length, 9ft wide and 10 ft tall, she was the queen of the battlefield, but needing a 7 man crew made her a bit of a whore(insert joke about 7 men in a tank here). You remember seeing her hull 75mm gun rip martian walkers apart, and the 37mm turret mow down martian infantry like the best of them. With a top speed of 42km/h she was surprisingly fast for her size.....

>>18774413
>Inb4 cheese sandwich

>>18774413
M3 HERE WE GO

>>18774413
A FUCKING GRANT ARE YOU SHITTING ME

>>18774413

>30 short tons
>75 mm HULL GUN
>IT'S A FUCKING LEE

ARE YOU FUCKING ME

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

THIS IS THE MOST GLORIOUS

>>18774413
>Lee
Oh boy, here we go

>>18774413
yes yes, tank very nice.

WHAT IS OUR GENDER.

WHAT IS OUR SEXUALITY.

>>18774440
OH NO WAIT
>7 MEN
A FUCKING LEE

IN 1943

THIS SHIT BELONGS IN A FUCKING MUSEUM

>>18774413
You monster, I will hunt you down for this. We're going to be killed by our own fucking rivets ricocheting into our brain.

>>18774480
SHE IS OUR LADY AND YOU WILL TREAT HER WITH RESPECT

>>18774465

GENDER: Пошел на хуй, вот что

>>18774493
When I called her a lady I didn't know she was a fucking 7 person coffin. This is a death trap not the stalwart lady who we entrust our lives to.

Too bad the Grant sucked so hard because of shoddy side armor, being a tall bugger, even the soviets, you know, the guys who sent wave after wave of infantry against german machine gun nests just to save artillery rounds, they didn't like it, calling it the "coffin for 7 comrades"! And a fucking hull sponson? Is this world war one all over again? YOU'VE SEEN FUCKING MK4 TANKS WITH BETTER GUN PLACEMENT! You feel like you just patted the head of the class retard.

"You tried your best, at least one good thing came out of you, the hull for the M4 Sherman."

You turn around, trying to forget you ever even looked at a Lee. You suppress the urge to throw up as approach your one true armoured companion....

>>18774514

YOU WILL TRUST THE LADY AND YOU WILL LIKE IT!

>>18774514
Well it seems as if she has kept us safe so far.

>>18774524

FUCK YOU PANZER

YOU WANT MY TEARS

HERE, DRINK THEM

>>18774524
AW SHIT

PULLIN' A FAST ONE

>>18774524
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
WELL FUCKING PLAYED

>>18774524
You magnificent bastard.

>>18774524
Come on 76mm let's get the gun that can actually kill things.

>>18774524

>THE BLACK PRINCE
>WE'RE DRIVING THE THING THAT INSPIRED THE BANEBLADE

NEVER MIND

THIS IS MOST GLORIOUS

>>18774413
>>18774524
DIE IN A FIRE

>>18774524
Looks like you just got churchrolled.

>>18774524
>speed: 18 kph
Yay British tank doctrine.

>>18774524
>Black fucking Prince

Oh god yes take all of my money

>>18774524

>Cruiser Tank

Oh god, no... please, panzer, not a cruiser...

PLEASE, ANYTHING BUT THAT, PLLLLLLEASE!!!!!

Well, it LOOKS like a nice tank...

>>18774585
Uh, the prince was an infantry tank.

>>18774602
>Lee
>Looks nice

>>18774603
>inb4 panzerhexen walks us around history's worst tanks before letting us know we have a desk job anyway.

>>18774602
It's a misshapen bastard child. It needs to be put down.

>>18774624
BUREAUCRACY QUEST

>>18774638
I'd play.

>>18774602
The M3 Grant is the retarded puppy of WWII tanks. You feel sorry for it and would never give it any responsibility but you can't get all that mad at it, it's trying its best.

>>18774645
Uh... you sure you want to play a bureaucrat in the same world where the MC of SWQ exists?

>>18774664
COURT MARTIAL!!

but

some sort of highly modified M3 would have been awesome.

>>18774664
Eh, we're British Army. He's USAAF. Not our problem.

>>18774664
Totally. We could have fun making him fill out forms for all the crap he does. You want to bounce a witch? That's a form. You want to hug a imouto? That's a form. You want to do waifu crap? That's 5 forms.

inb4 panzer gives us a CDL

>>18774681
If by modified you mean stripped to the chassis and made into a Sherman then maybe.

>>18774697
You want to kick my ass
15 forms + a fee

>>18774694

Trust me...

MC will do something that WILL make it our problem...

>The fuck is that P-61 doing Colonel?
>I'm not sure, but doesn't it look like it's coming right at us?

>>18774524
Know what the best part about your baby is? Other then the QF17pdr. And two 7.92mm Besa-machine guns?

The ability to also mount all the other weapons a witch will ever need.
Flamethrowers? Check
Fuck-huge 290mm mortar rounds you can lob like demolition charges? Check
Decent 75mm gun? Check
Breastplate? Check
Makes you look taller? Check
Shoulder-mounted 3inch Howitzer? Check
Bayonets everywhere? Check

Now if only you had bad-ass sponson guns like your old Mk4 striker you had in the last war... God you feel old

>>18774711
A Churchill? I love you.

>>18774711
>The ability to also mount all the other weapons a witch will ever need.

Huh

>>18774711

>We're a witch

>>18774711
We witch

>>18774681
WHAT HAPPENED TO HER LEGS!

ARE TANK WITCHES AMPUTEES?

>>18774711
GODDAMMIT WE HAVE BOOBS

>>18774711
I love you. I love you so much right now.

>>18774711
>ACTION
>FONDLE SELF

>>18774711
So We British Competent Minna?

>>18774732
This is bad?

>>18774711

>>18774727
Dimensional wormhole

>>18774681

>M3 With 25-pounder howitzer in sponson, and 40mm Bofors Flak gun in Turret

Or one of those 10.5cm StuH42 guns the Krauts had, if they're there.

>>18774711

>The ability to also mount all the other weapons a witch will ever need.

Wait, we Tank-Witch now?

>>18774711

My roommate literally told me to quit the maniacal laughter. I think I frightened him.

BECAUSE OF YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

>INB4 HUSBANDOFAGGING

.........
Do we still get out Pith Hat?

>>18774711
We're NOT old.
Never say that.
We're experienced, we've seen more shit then these prancy little entitled witches could ever Dream of.
And THEY rely on Us. Not the other way around.

Straighten your cap Colonel, we're going for a Spin. Get this tank fueled up because it's time the girls report for introductions. We're the commander, we should have to hunt their little pantless asses down, Gimme that loudspeaker!