In b4 Panzer.

IT BEGINS

In durring/after panzer

>Find some place to crash

SLEEP MOTHERFUCKER.

in after panzer

>FIND BIGGER GUN
Because no good MARTIAN goes about unarmed!

MORE DAKKA

well shoe those greasy naked apes whos boss.

>>18702227
>Find DELICIOUS SUSTENANCE

Fucking hell, we're hungry. Lets see if there are any more of those human infants. Veal sounds good.

>>18702260
>>18702256
>>18702251
>>18702249
>>18702238
Perfect five post spread. Would you look at that?

>attacked by a guy with a fucking metal stick riding a fucking herd animal

...wait..... the cow WASN'T theirs?


...then who the FUCK does it belong to?


find somewhere to crash

>>18702227
>Find a bigger god-damned gun
Everything is better with more firepower.

>Get a CROWBAR

For the irony. Also,

>FIND BIGGER GUN

#SWQ @rizon.net for sexy times with other swq fans~

>>18702290
>>18702290
Good question. Where's Hellcow from if not Mars?

>>18702290
We are lowly infantry
Need to know basis etc

>Captcha: Cishow (Picture of a brick wall)
...The fuck man

>>18702227
Sustenance. N'oo'p requires fuel. There's gonna be a lot of nope ahead, and we don't want to burn out in the middle of it.

>>18702290
Oh boy. This isn't good. This isn't good at all.

>>18702304
>Get a CROWBAR
MY SIDES

>>18702290
>implying the Martian strike squad took time to examine the well-disguised 'bot for pertient details while Sean was riding it, swinging a sword, and screaming like the crazy fucking Irishman he is

>>18702227
>Find a bigger god-damned gun

Let's see what these aleums got by way of firepower.

>>18702290
the question.... is whether THEY are here for our precious bodily fluids as well.

>>18702290
It's theirs, but the group it attacked might not know that.
Let's find a bigger gun.

>>18702227
We need some Delicious Sustenance, that's our first priority.

>>18702290
>third alien force entering the fray

I don't THINK planefag is gonna pull that on us.

Maybe

We just finished NOPE-ing our way out of getting killed by the MC. We need food and we need a fucking nap.

>>18702290
it wasnt their unit's. how the fuck is n'oo'p supposed to know about what the alium equivalent of DARPA's making
>>18702227
always moar dakka

>>18702290
Oh shit man. Don't say it's the phobos-damned Venusians who planted that thing to get a piece of the cake.
It's either them or the Merkurians. Could never trust those bastards.

>>18702227
Wait, so Nopelium is a wise ass too? Is he just the Martian version of us?

>>18702366
well, think about it

What would we do if we opened a door, by ourselves, and saw three aliens armed with bizarre weaponry staring at us?

>>18702382
BOUNCE

>>18702382
Crazy Ivan

>>18702227
Fuck aliums, acquire sustenance.

>>18702391
You can't bounce once they've seen you.

>>18702355
still, you'd think they wuld at least alert troops that they had assets in the area.

Wasn't it supposed to be there to protect their mobile "STRIKE HERE" beacon (Chris)

>>18702382
Shut and barracade the door, then grab a shotgun. Worked for the south.

I feel like I missed something.

>killhappy aliens
>implying we're not genociding an entire species

yay hypocrisy.

>>18702227
Dog: N'oo'p

>>18702409
Maybe. But by that time they might have been done with Chris, in which case she and Hellcow would be disposable.

You look at the little hand-held maser in your primary tentacle. You turn it over and over, admiring the craftsmanship, and then you hurl the useless fucking thing as far as you possibly fucking can, watching tumble serenely through the air as it vanishes behind some of those stalky plant-wall things.

Fuck those things. Fuck them so hard. Fuck them left, and right, and center, may they be eaten by a cavernswallow and shat out as a pile of biomatter waste. Stinky waste. Really stinky waste. You and your buddies don't even bother checking them anymore, you just toss a grenade into the center of those little boxy hedgerows and call it a day.

"I believe," you mutter, "That I need a bigger darkness-damned gun."

And you know just where to find one - if you look.

It's a bit of a hike, through dangerous territory, but you set out, slipping through the alien foliage easily on your many tentacles. You pass through the flaming and soot-soiled wreckage of war, dead humans and martians alike littering the battlefield, but at long last you come to your destination.

The small stone building with the many small stone squares set in the field, with a wall around it too low to stop anybody or anything.

...humans are fucking weird.

Find DELICIOUS SUSTENANCE

I'm not saying it was aliens

>>18702438
HA HA WE GRAVE RAIDERS NOW

>>18702438

NICE TRIP BRO.

>>18702438

THAT WAS ME

THANKS FIREFOX NO WAIT FUCK YOU

>>18702438
So, martians don't have graveyards then.

Do they have organized religion?

>>18702438
Forgot the trip Fap Angel. Or your a very, very lazy troll.

>>18702438
So wait, what day is it? Is this in the past relative to the main timeline, or the present?

>>18702455

>firefox
?implying yo dont drop your trip yourself to fuck with the votes and then just forget

>>18702290
The Neuroi, obviously.

>>18702496
>Neuroi VS Martians VS Humans

not sure if awesome, worrying, or despair-inducing

>>18702461
Or they just have a different way of handling their dead. Not everybody does graveyards the European way.

>>18702438

There, littered among the funny carved stony-things, are the many, many weapons that your units strike squad abandoned when they were attacked by the... whatever. Nearby is the flaming remains of that earthling ground-vehicle. And of course, there's the building itself.

You could search any of these for a newer, bigger, better, hardcore, badass gun.

>See if one of those Earthling weapons is any good. Their slugthrowers are better then anything mars makes anways.
>Check the Martian weapons. We need to Shreck some fucking Panzers.
>Check the Martian weapons because it's FRY-AP CITY WITH DIS PUPPY
>Check the earthling building for good measure?

>>18702526
>See if one of those Earthling weapons is any good. Their slugthrowers are better then anything mars makes anways.

GET A COLT

also
>Check the earthling building for good measure?

>>18702526
>Check the Martian weapons. We need to Shreck some fucking Panzers.

WE TANK KILLERS NOW.

>>18702526
CHECK EARTH BUILDING
FIND INEXPLICABLE PARKOUR COURSE INSIDE
FOLLOW TO END
LOOT DELICIOUS TREASURE

>>18702526
Probably best to check the Martian stuff first, and get something we're familiar with. Then we can go looking for a alium toy to play with.

>>18702482

I did something much, much worse.

I suggested the use of tandem-charge SRMs in another thread.

>>18702526
>Check the Martian weapons because it's FRY-AP CITY WITH DIS PUPPY

>>18702290
planefag hasn't posted an image response to this, so yeah it's not happening

>>18702526
>CHECK EARTH BUILDING

>>18702526
What sort of equipment do we have on? We've got enough arms to hold a lot of things.

>>18702526

lets check out the building. sneeky monkeys could be sneaky in there.

pick up of the marsy weapons first though. one we know how to work.

>Check the earthling building for good measure [x]

Don't forget that we need a crobar

>>18702526
Go with better Martian equipment until we find a good Earthling gun. Maybe keep the Martian one handy so if the higher-ups ask we can say we're carrying the human weapon around as a trophy to mess with their heads.

Also, I'd laugh if Hellcow was a Neuroi.

>>18702526
i'm not sure n'oo'p is ready to see what happened in the building...jack churchill went berserk in there didn't he?

and: Check the Martian weapons. We need to Shreck some fucking Panzers.

>>18702526
[x]See if one of those Earthling weapons is any good. Their slugthrowers are better then anything mars makes anways.

>CHECK INVENTORY
Then
>Check the earthling building for good measure

>>18702526
Check the earthling building for good measure.

Hear that, planefag? That is the sound of inevitability.

Earth Weaponry!

BECAUSE LASERS ARE COOL AND ALL BUT GUNS ARE BOTH AWESOME AND PRACTICAL

>See if one of those Earthling weapons is any good. Their slugthrowers are better then anything mars makes anways.

>And find a damn crowbar while you're at it.

>>18702550
we can't be friends anymore

Any chance we could find a human willing to swap some of their 'tobacco' in exchange for a roll of our red weed?

>>18702526
Grab a slugger and check the building for more crazy earth-tech.

>>18702636
Considering what I know about humans, yes, yes you can.

>>18702526
As long as I dont get schrecked

point against earth weaponry - ammunition!

You cast a jaundiced eye over the Martian weaponry. Standard shit - heavy sling-masers, minirocket-rifles, a heavy rapidfire minirocketlauncher, standard shit.

And then you see it.

Lying abandoned in the green vegetation, lonely and forlorn, one of the earthling death-implements. It looks like it was torn from its mount on the vehicle when it was toppled.

You amble over to it, checking in all directions, cautiously. Gently, you reach out and lift the thing - god damn, but it's heavy. You'll have to fashion a sling for it.

It's... sturdy.

Heavy.

Dull.

Well, can't hurt to try it, right? You look for something mechanically inclined for tugging, and tug it.

It goes off.

>>18702660
I don't think we're lucky enough.

>>18702670
Oh dear.

>>18702670
>alien with a Ma Deuce

Well, THIS will make for some interesting intel reports at Allied HQ....

>>18702611

FOUR GREAT BEARS. CLAN LPLS WITH TARGETING COMPUTERS.

... okay, I'm still horrible. BUT SO IS THAT FAGGOT

>>18702670
>It goes off.
N'oo'p

>>18702670
The End

NEXT TIME ON STRIKE WITCHES

>>18702670
aaaaaand we're deaf now

>>18702703
Do martians even have ear drums to shatter?

>>18702670
N'oo'p's gonna get knocked on his ass. Or his torso, or whatever.

>>18702712
D-does he even have an ass?
Or a torso for that matter?

>>18702670
Someone needs to learn trigger discipline.

>>18702725
>trigger discipline
>test firing a weapon

The two are rather mutually exclusive.

Hey, guys, shitty drawfag here. Sorry if took so long, but IRL shit happened.
To the anon who prepared the plans, thanks for the idea
Here's the Substriker Unit.
Practical(ish) bits:
>Mk 1 Torpedoes launched from modified Fliegerhammer
>Wetsuit has mana/magic conductors to connect striker leg to main apparatus
>Comms unit can be used as sonar array by recon/radar witches like sanya

Fanservice bits:
>wetsuit is completely backless for skin contact with main unit
>underwear of anykind is not allowed under the suit for max magic transfer.

Any ideas is welcome, but I'll be gone for a few hours, so I wont be able to see them until later.

Enjoy anons, and thanks planefag for the awesome threads.
Seeya

>>18702707
sensitive drum-like surface is pretty good for picking up atmospheric vibrations
and bad when the vibrations get really big

>>18702734
It isn't when you don't know which end fires yet.

>>18702738
I enjoy this.

>>18702721
I'd assume there's a central mass of some sort that the tentacles attach to, and that contains on the organs and such.

>>18702738
I'm guessing they use a skin-layer of magic to keep pressure, otherwise they'd turn into meatballs.

>>18702749
I'd say that's pretty obviously the one with the hole.

>>18702670

The earthling weapon goes MOTHERUFCKING BLAM

BUT NOT JUST ONE BLAM. IT GOES LIKE FORTY FUCKING BLAMS. THE AIR BECOMES A MAELSTROM OF HORRIBLE NOISE, LIKE THE ROCKSLIDES DOWN OLYMPUS MONS, LIKE THE HAMMERBLOWS OF THE CAVERN HUNTERS, LIKE NOTHING YOU'VE EVER FELT BEFORE.

From the other end, it's terrifying. It lets you know you've got to get your head down because the earthlings are trying to kill your sorry ass. But on this end... in YOUR hands...

"You want minimum range?" you hiss. "YOU WANT OBVIOUS-FUCKING EXHAUST CONTRAILS? FUCK YOU. ROCKETS ARE FLUMPH-DISGUSTING. AHA! AHAHA! AAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA...."

You trail off awkwardly, and look around to make sure nobody's heard your mad laughter.

Well, the earthlings in that tank probably did, but they don't understand Martian. Lucky you.

>GET IN DA BUILDING
>GET IN DA GRAVEYARD
>GET CLOSER TO THE TANK, YOU WANT TO HIT THEM WITH YOUR NEW GUN

>>18702738

I've forgotten, were we still calling Submarine Aces in WW2? I know it was that way in WWI

>GET IN DA BUILDING

>>18702767
>tank
GET IN DA GRAVEYARD

>>18702767
>GET IN DA BUILDING

NOOOOOPPE

>>18702767
BUILDING! We don't want to get killed so quick after finding a new boom boom.

DA BUILDING

>>18702767
>GET IN DA BUILDING [x]

>>18702767
Shit, I want to hit them with the new gun but I also want N'oo'p to survive longer.

Get in da building.

>>18702767
>GET IN DA GRAVEYARD

>GET CLOSER TO THE TANK, YOU WANT TO HIT THEM WITH YOUR NEW GUN
NOPE.

Let's >GET IN DA BUILDING

calling it now, by the end of this arc N'OO'P MARTIAN will be MC's nemesis

>>18702765
You ever looked at a old bazooka? Holes on all the ends! Earthling guns are weird.

>>18702800
Sorry, EGO and PRIDE are the forerunners for that position

[x] GET IN DA BUILDING

>>18702801
Yes, but this one has one hole. Well technically there's more, but there's only one that's on the end.

>>18702725
The man's loading it, since it's a breach loader. It's rocket artillery, it doesn't fire from the rear, it fires after you load it and yank on whatever you yank on to fire it.

>>18702800
But the martian isn't a pilot. Only a pilot can be MC's nemesis.

>>18702759
Well if we're going by the gif up there, it looks like they're just a head with a bunch of tentacles attached to the bottom. Not really much room for internal organs or anything. Martians are weird.

>>18702767
>minimum range
>probably talking about Masers

Suddenly, troops entering combat with melee weapons against the martians doesn't seem stupid

>>18702819
Accepted. Still, trigger discipline N'oo'p. So you don't burn off a whole belt with one squeeze.

>>18702838
a lot of the martian weaponry is also rocket based, so there's a pretty obvious reason for minimum ranges for those as well

fix bayonets!

>>18702767
>GET IN DA BUILDING
FLUMPHFLUMPHFLUMPHFLUMPH

>>18702838
I think he's talking about the minirockets.

calling it now, we used up all our ammo when test firing it

>>18702828
N'oo'p picked up a machine gun, not a stovepipe.

>>18702838
he's talking about the gyro jets

>>18702838
FLY US CLOSER, SEAN WANTS TO HIT THEM WITH HIS SWORD

THE BUILDING.

IT IS HEAVY AND MADE OF STONE PERHAPS THAT WILL WORK.

You spring for the heavy structure as fast as your tentacles will carry you, slam your thick skull right into the door with all your might, and bounce right off the fucking thing god-damn OW OW OW FUCKING OW.

Behind you, the "blamblamblam" of earthing fire opens up, and the bullets punch right through the door like it wasn't there.

Well, that was fortunate. You spring athletically for the little window near the door, neatly fly through, and tuck-and-roll once inside, leaving your new gun behind. You need something a little more familiar at the moment. Clambering to your tentacleends, you find yourself covered in blood.

The building is full of martians that have been hacked into fucking pieces.

Limbs. Limbs. Everywhere. The floor is inches deep in sticky blood, and the overpowering scent of it is horrifying. Weapons are about, but nothing heavy enough to threaten an armored fighting vehicle.

A high-explosive shell hits the stone wall behind you and your world vanishes in noise and flame and shrapnel.

planefag, I must ask.

Are you just a warbirdfag or a general antiqueaircraftfag?

>>18702888
HOLY FUCK EXIT WITH A BIT OF WHITE CLOTH WE ARE SO FUCKING DEAD

>>18702892

Primarily warbirds, but the Ford Trimotor is a sexy sexy bitch, mmhmm.

>>18702888
Welp

FUCK, THE HUMERS ARE KILLING US, HOW DO WE ESCAPE.

>Martians have tentacles?
Wat

>>18702888
BEHOLD THE DEADLY WORK OF THE ONE THEY CALL CHURCHILL.

>>18702888
Alas poor N'oo'p, I knew thee well. For thou was an alium of never giving a fuck.

>>18702880
... For some reason, I was thinking of the Nebelwerfer.

You'd think after 12 hours of sleep, I'd be more awake than this...

>>18702904
>Ford Trimotor is a sexy sexy bitch, mmhmm.

guess what i'm gonna be right seating in tomorrow morning? :D

>>18702888

Shoot those asshats with a whole lot of those guns that are lying about, then run out the back. With enough guns shooting out, they'll think there are more than just you in here, so they won't just run in and shoot your shit for breakfast.

I vote we surrender

>>18702926
theyre in a tank...why bother getting out at all

>>18702888
N'oo'p, I hardly knew ya!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yg_rf2d894k

N'oo'p just can't catch a fucking break. I knew we should have gone for the delicious sustenance.

>>18702932
Pretty sure they're not interested. Human experimentation and all.

>>18702888

You come to a second or two later against the far wall of the place, draped over some long, narrow wooden bench. For a long moment, all you can think of is how incredibly uncomfortable the damn thing is, and that's coming from a guy who came to this miserable dirtball in a drop-pod designed by pebble-counting tight-tentacled accountants with their skulls up their elimination tubes.

Then it's like oh right TANK.

Scrabbling to your tentacles, you look for cover, any cover at all. You dive behind the little podium-thing on the raised stage thingajigger, thinking that it'll at least provide protection from shrapnel and interior wall spalling, when you spot a trap-door on the rear of the stage.

You fling it open, dive inside head-first, and your skull collides with somebody else's skull with a loud CLICK!

Then the tank fires again.

WE'RE HAVING FUN TODAY

If we stay within the buildinging, the human vehicle can shell us at their leisure until they bring the thing down around us or they run out of those explosive things. How many explosive things are in a vehicle? Fuck if you know.

There is only one chance. We must sneak out the back, crawl along the ground like Martian Snake, surprise the tank crew, defeat them in tentacle-to-hand combat using our venusian karate, and commandeer their vehicle. And now we have our bigger gun.

>>18702950
LET IT BE ANOTHER FELLOW MARTIAN PLEASE BECAUSE WE CAN'T FUCKING DEAL WITH KILLAPES ANYMORE

>>18702950
What did we just run into?

>>18702950
OH BOY SOME MORE KILL HAPPY ALIUMS WELL WE MIGHT AS WELL CORDIALLY INVITE THEM TO FUCK US IN THE ASS LIKE ALL THE OTHERS

>>18702950
Oh god kill it!
At least we're probably safe from the tank here.

>>18702972
If it's not, I say surrender. Let's just quit while we're behind.

>>18702950

As the latest blast of high-explosive tears through your ears, you feel tentacles wrapping around your headbase.

"DIE, EARTHLING! DIE!" somebody screams.

You reach out daintily and slap the moron with half your tentacles.

"WHO HAS TENACLES?" you ask.

"Whu-"

You slap him again. "WHO HAS TENTACLES?"

Above you, the screams and whines and ricochets of human bullets sound inside the stone walls of the building.

"I uh"

"WHO!" you slap him, "HAS," you slap him, "TENTACLES!"

"MARTIANS!" the martian screams.

"THEN WHO THE FUCK AM I?"

"A MARTIAN!?"

"NO I'M A FUCKING CAVE SWALLOW WHO DO YOU FUCKING THINK," you scream with mad, mad rage, and start flailing on the stupid fucker as best you can in the narrow cellar of the building. "GARHD DAM FURK HURRR GLHARRRRR"

>>18702950
Tanks and skulls and skulls and tanks
The earthlings never slew ya
N'oo'p, I hardly knew ya!

>>18703002
MY SIDES

>>18703002
It's like the worst kind of nerd slap fight.

>>18703002
oh god literally all the martains are mentally deranged

>>18703002
How the hell did this fucker survive basic on Titan?

>>18703002
Jesses! Leave something for the humans!

>>18703002

After slapping somebody's shit with mad, short little whippy strikes of your tentacles, you finally calm down enough to note the bullets above have finally ceased.

"... are th-"

You smack the other Martian again.

"Stay quiet."

"... you just did that because you were pissed."

"Yup." With one dainty tentacle, you lift the lid of your hiding space and poke your head up. Late-day light floods the building, since the wall at one end has been blown open, allowing the human tank to strafe the interior. It looks like they mistook you for one of the hacked-apart martians, and moved on.

Your new companion stick his own skull out as well, and immediately dives in again to be violently ill below. You squeeze your eyes shut as you realize you were laying in an inch of blood that'd seeped through the wooden stage and into your cellar.

"Come on," you mutter, dragging your new "friend" forward.

>>18703002
N'oo'p really needs a bottle of Olympus Mons' foulest rotgut after this day is over

>and somehow the aliums are putting up a serious fight on earth

stupid, stupid sexy airplane...

>>18703064
As long as he is walking in front of us.

>>18703064
has the color of martian blood been established?

>>18703064
Time to get the hell out.

>>18703064
We should probably keep an eye out for a weapon of some sort we could use against that. Also, it'd be good to get a recap of what sort of base we have set up here. It was apparently close by.

>>18703064

Gliding forward, you hurriedly retrieve your new human toy, and from the nearby wreckage you liberate a ton of extra ammo belts for the thing.

Your new buddy tilts his head sideways, examining it. Language between the species is absolutely impenetrable, despite the eggheads best efforts, but at least numbers are discenrable.

"Three-thousand and six." He blinks. "Three-thousand-and-six of what?"

"Dumb fucking questions," you snap at him, and he shrinks.

"... sorry."

Part of you realizes that he's been hiding in that cellar for almost a day after all his squaddies were brutally slaughtered, but did he ride a crash-landing captured earthman freighter into the ground? Fuck no.

That tank might be back. With friends.

>Scour the ground for munitions. IT IS TIME FOR VENGENCE.
>Get back to your own fucking perimeter, fuck this noise.
>Hide and wait for the cover of darkness.

>>18703138
scour the ground for munitions

>>18703138

theyve put us through enough shit!

find something big and bang-y that can show that tank whos boss.

>>18703115
Yeah. "Was" being the operative term here.

>>18703138

>Get back to your own fucking perimeter, fuck this noise.

Time to GTFO with our new Browning.

>>18703138

Darkness is the way.

>>18703138
sing them the war songs of your people. it is time for vengeance

>>18703138
WAIT UNTIL DARKNESS
WE WILL HAVE THE ADVANTAGE! Mars' atmosphere is much darker than Earth's.

>>18703138
HA. We have a BAR.
I am completely ok with this.
Hide and wait. No need to tempt fate twice.

>>18703138
WE ARE THE VENGEANCE
WE ARE THE NIGHT
WE ARE either finding a 'Schreck or running like fuck.

>>18703138
.30-06 ammo, eh? .30 caliber machinegun. Not bad.

>>18703174
>BAR
>it went bang 40 times

N'oo'p... dares to dream big.

>>18703174
>ammo belts
>BAR

i think we have a browning .30 cal

BARs weren't vehicle mounted. It's a browning.

>>18703138
COVER OF DARKNESS.
WE ARE THE NIGHT.
WE ARE THE BOUNCE.

>>18703138
Nope all the way back to the perimiter.

>>18703208
Strike from above, they'll never expect that.

Defect!

We're N'oo'p, not the MC. I think it's our solemn duty to AVOID fighting as much as possible, because it means less chance of getting fucking murderated by those crazy humans.

So it's probably a 1919, a Lewis, or a Johnson LMG.
We should probably check back in with command. They'll have heard this, probably, but we don't want to lose track of them.

>>18703138
>wait for cover of darkness
meanwhile
>reflect on how the war started

>>18703226
Durr, only one of those is belt fed. Never mind me.

>>18703138
There is only one answer.

And that answer is NOPE.

>>18703194
>>18703196
>>18703199
Jesus, forgot .30-06 was also used in belt feeders. I derped. My bad.

>>18703138
>Hide and wait for the cover of darkness [x]

>>18703236
ooh i like this. exposition!

>>18703270
and the metagaming begins in ernest goes to camp wamatochick

Scouring the battlefield, you retrieve a few weapons - a bandoleer of grenades and most importantly some anti-tank thumpers, little weapons with clever warheads that are decent at punching through armor. Something about a miniaturized capacitance coil firing an electrical discharge to ionize a jet of explosive-formed plasma that... who fucking knows, you're a grunt, not a technician.

"This is more my style," your new friend says, gently stroking a heavy repeater. The weapon fires large minirockets with a high rate of fire, and is generally considered a lovely asskicker.

"Whatever," you mutter, detaching the sling from a portable maser. To your absolute delight, the human weapon exhibits attachments for something similar, and you're able to clip the sling onto it. "Boo-yeah."

"Now what?"

"We wait for those fuckers," you mutter, "and we devastate them."

Your new friend raises his repeater, resolute.

"What's your name, anyhow?"

"D'rr'p," he tells you.

"Well, D'rr'p, lets find a hole and sit in it."

>>18703301
Acquire sunglasses. At night.

>>18703301
Ah perfect, we wait for darkness and let D'rr'p's worthless carcass cover our escape. Right?

>>18703301
Let's kick some ass. Once it comes nears us, I mean.

>>18703301
>"What's your name, anyhow?"
>"D'rr'p," he tells you

this is why I love you PF

We heavy weapons guy now.

>>18703301
>MFW I see the name
Hell yes. HELL YES.

>>18703314
We have 7 eyes. Where are we going to find some that fit?

>Derpalium
Is derpalium wearing a red carapace covering?

>>18703339
We'll burn that bridge when it comes to it.

>>18703301
So... We're gonna get bounced now?

>>18703301

You and D'rr'p take cover in a drainage culvert underneath a vehicle path. Darkness soon falls, and the sounds of wildlife change as the nocturnal creatures emerge. Especially those ones that just chirrup all night long.

You prick up your tentacles as those chirruping insects suddenly go quiet. In the distance, you hear the rumbling sound of earthling engines coming down the road. D'rr'p readies his heavy repeater eagerly, and looks over at you, raising his tentacletops in a quizzical expression.

>Let them drive over the road and B-B-BLAM them from below!
>Let them drive past and shoot 'em up from behind! YOUR THROWING TENTACLE IS STRONG.
>Hose them down from the front and set off your thumper in the culvert, shutting down the road!

>>18703384
From Below

>>18703384
Blam them from below, all armored vehicles have shitty underarmor and it's really difficult to counter attack from that position.

>Let them drive past and shoot 'em up from behind! YOUR THROWING TENTACLE IS STRONG.

>>18703384

death from below.

we dirt shark now.

>>18703384
from behind

>>18703384
Drive past, blow the shit out of their back, run like hell.

>>18703384
>Let them drive past and shoot 'em up from behind! YOUR THROWING TENTACLE IS STRONG.

Earthling baseball never steered anyone wrong.

>>18703384
Below

>>18703384
>Let them drive past and shoot 'em up from behind! YOUR THROWING TENTACLE IS STRONG.
So very strong.

From behind.

>>18703384
REMEMBER WHERE WE KEEP OUR REPRODUCTIVE ORIFICES?

REAL MARTIANS DO IT FROM BELOW

behind

>>18703384
>From behind.

Tanks have crappy rear armor, and if they're a little ways away, we don't get caught in secondary explosions if they light the fuck up.

>>18703434
technically, if these martians are the same ones from war of the worlds, then REAL martians do it asexualy

>>18703384
Hit 'em from behind.
Do we have any armor in our camp? We might want to keep the roads intact.

behind

From behind. Drp has minirockets and would blow him self up if he fired from below

>>18703434
Except for Japan.
There they just come from everywhere.

>From Behind

>>18703460

tragic

FROM BEYOND

>>18703460
Some casualties just can't be avoided.

>220 posts, 12 relevant PF posts, 1.5 hours
WHAT'S HAPPENING

>>18703487

slow night

>>18703487
>not 500 posts

WE'RE SLIPPING!

>>18703481
But he might blow /us/ up too.... N'oo'p is sitting right next to him at the moment.

"What do we do?" D'rr'p asks you.

"Let'em pass," you tell him. "I was always hot-shit at killydisc."

D'rr'p undulates his tentacles dubiously, but says nothing.

You both cower in fear as the terrifically loud clanking of earthling tracks thunders overhead. They're loud, and break down easily, but on their silly little paths they do move pretty fast. You wait till the last vehicle has moved down the way a bit, then you stick your head out and ready your thumper.

"Thumpers" can be fired from a small spigot-mortar, or the muzzle of most rocket-tubes, but the characteristic "thump" can give away your position. From the way those sinister little "thumps" attract machine-gun fire and rifle-grenades, the earthlings have learned to respect them.

There's another way to use them, though. You take the little rounded cylinder and unscrew the small solid-fuel propellent charge that provides the little kicker "thump", and toss it aside. That leaves the telescoping launch-rod you usually stick down the launching tube of your rocket-rifle... and the spring-loaded fins.

You flex your throwing tentacle, your mind traveling back to all those happy times, playing killydisc with your school chums. The lovely weather, the happy cheers of your parents, and above all, the bitter bitch-wails of the chumps as you nail them in the head with those stingy, stingy discs. Aah. Yeah.

Time for round two.

>>18703504
>Martian sports.

Huh.

>>18703504

dodge ball with frisbees?

barbarians.

>>18703504
But we always lost at killydisc!

>>18703504
Time to drink some coffee so I can spit it out when the awesome shit happens.

rolled 49 = 49

for great success!

>>18703504
Don't forget the change in gravity

>>18703504
How many tentacles do we use to throw it?

>>18703541
That's not the point! We still played!

>>18703553
denser air too

>>18703554
Numerous.

>>18703504
>The lovely weather, the happy cheers of your parents, and above all, the bitter bitch-wails of the chumps as you nail them in the head with those stingy, stingy discs.

Oh my siiiiiidess......

>MEANWHILE, AT CASTLE BARIN

>>18703504

With a whiplike snap of your tentacle, you hurl the thumper at the trailing vehicle of the column. The tube and it's fins automatically stabilize the projectile, now effectively a grenade, as it sails majestically through the air.

It bounces off the rear armor of the tail-end tank, rolls down its rear deck, and clatters to the hard surface of the road harmlessly.

Then the starter charge goes off - the one that ignites the rocket propellent you already removed. The grenade does a neat little backtumble and hits the tailing tank right on the top of its turret.

*WHUMPHFFFZT!*

There's horrible, horrible alien screaming, and you see earthlings bailing out of the tank like its on fire.

Oh, wait, it is. The shell in the breech of the gun cooks off shortly and the tank really begins to burn.

Slinging your new toy into position, you open fire.

>>18703551
Wow, you managed mediocrity regardless of whether we're doing low or high rolls.

>>18703588
Mediocrity is safest

>>18703584
You never disappoint, planefag.

>>18703584
Now we send D'rrr'p up to slag the lead tank in the column, and we're cooking Chechen style!

>>18703584
WOOOO SCORE ONE TANK

>>18703584
Light up those humies real good like.

>>18702738
Original drawingfaggot here.

I love you.

>>18703588
>Planefag
>Taking rolls

>>18703584
gunning down burning tank crewmen
truly N'oo'p has had enough of this bullshit

>>18703605
Hey man, think you could draw Nopelium dissing his superiors with mocking tentacle quivering from the first post?

as a devoted HFY, this thread sickens me

REVENGE!!!

>>18703620
Original with respect to the Substriker, not the quest itself.

>>18703629
Awwww. Oh well.

>>18703606
I know we don't do rolls on this quest, I just felt it important to mock the person who was rolling.

>>18702738
>>18703605
Also, rewriting my story to use this design. It's too delicious not to use.

>>18703584

As your human medium machine gun opens up, chaos and confusion reigns amongst the human forces. For a few minutes they scream at you and wave things, like that's going to stop you.

"Hey," D'rr'p says. "I think they want you to stop shooting."

You leap out of your hidey-hole, your machinegun slung at your mid-tent line, and let the humans know what you think of that.

"NNOOOOOOOOOOOPE YOU FUCKING KNUCKLE-DRAGGING APE-FUCKS! NO FUCKING WAY! HAVE SOME SUPER-DENSE ALLOY, MOTHERFUCKERS!" You hold down the trigger of your new gun, spraying bullets around with absolutely no regard for aim, sending the earthlings diving for the dirt in a panic. The tanks at the front of the column have turned around, but on the narrow, plantwall-lined path, they've no room to turn around and shoot past their fallen comrade.

Yeah. Yeah, deal with it.

A bullet creases the air near your skull, and D'rr'p is shouting like a baby.

>MY RAGE PIERCES THE HEAVEEEEEEENS
>Earthling status: trolled. Time to NOPE on out of here.

>>18703641
Time to NOPE.

>Earthling status: trolled. Time to NOPE on out of here.
Make like our names and NOPE.

http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html

Also.

>>18703641
>Earthling status: trolled. Time to NOPE on out of here.

woosh

NOPE out of the area. NOPE NOPE NOPE

>>18703641
>Earthling status: trolled. Time to NOPE on out of here.

There's a reason we're called NOPE martian.

>>18703641
MY RAGE KNOWS NO BOUNDS
UUUU-FUCKING-LLAAAAAAAA BITCH

>>18703641

we are a bit outnumbered.

scram like a skiter bird.

>>18703641
>>Earthling status: trolled. Time to NOPE on out of here.

Let's get going before they manage to get at us with that tanks.

OUTOUTOUTOUT

>>18703641
MY RAGE PIERCES THE HEAVENS
JACK CHURCHILL SHALL RUE THE DAY HE DESECRATED HOLY GROUND

>>18703641
i'd say get out while the gettin's good

and sing. sing songs of war and victory. let the humans tremble at the browning-toting monster they've created

>>18703641
Time to NOOOPE on out.

>>18703641
Its is me or does N'OO'P seem more competent than ALL of Martian High Command?

>>18703680
NA NA, NA NA NA NA, HEY HEY HEY, GOODBYE

>>18703695
he has 13 tentacles instead of 14, NOPE'll never be promoted

>>18703695
iunno, they've done some pretty smart shit (all of which has caused MC bodily harm of some kind)

i think its probably just your average high command, full of both retards and competent people

>>18703641
NOPE.

>>18703695
I was about to make a joke about Martian Mallory, but then I remembered that MC encountered an alium Big Wing the last time he flew. Apparently it doesn't take much.

What tanks are we talking about here? Tigers or T-34s?

>>18703641

"ARE WE ATTACKING!?!" D'rr'p asks.

"NOPE," you state eloquently, and flee with a panicked, full-speed FLUMPHUMPHUMPHUMPHUMPHUMPHUMPH as your tentacles pound the turf.

D'rr'p opens up with his heavy repeater, the swift silibant swishy sound of rockets being pumped out of the tube at a rapid clip as he covers your retreat. You pause about a hundred feet down the path, ready your human gun, and find it's out of boolit. You look at it helplessly, and realize you don't know how to reload it yet.

Down the path, you see an earthling charging at D'rr'p, who's in the middle of slapping a new minirocket drum into his weapon. The earthling has a standard rifle, but he- he- he's put a MINIATURE SWORD on the end of it. And he's about to preforate D'rr'p!

>MY KILLYDISC TALENTS ARE AMAZING
>DO A STUPID DANCE TO DISTRACT THE ALIUMS!
>APPROPRIATE BLUDGEONING WEAPON FROM THAT WRECKED VEHICLE OVER THERE

>>18703641
THE ANSWER IS OBVIOUS

>>18703749
>MY KILLYDISC TALENTS ARE AMAZING
IN THE FACE BITCH

>>18703749
>MY KILLYDISC TALENTS ARE AMAZING

>>18703749
FUCKYEARKILLYDISC

>>18703749
>APPROPRIATE BLUDGEONING WEAPON FROM THAT WRECKED VEHICLE OVER THERE

>>18703695

martians are united enough to stage an interplanetary invasion. thevey probably had a close to united planet for a long long time. that kinda thing will fuck up you officer tradition. no one with actual experience for generations.

[x] MY KILLYDISC TALENTS ARE AMAZING

>>18703749
Appropriate bludgeoning weapon? WE'RE HOLDING ONE.

>>18703749
>MY KILLYDISC TALENTS ARE AMAZING

>>18703749
>>DO A STUPID DANCE TO DISTRACT THE ALIUMS!
It's time to bust a move.

>>18703744
>T-34's or Tigers
>On The Glorious British Isles
What the fuck are you smoking?

>>18703749

>DO A STUPID DANCE TO DISTRACT THE ALIUMS!

Waggle our noodly appendages.

>>18703749
>APPROPRIATE BLUDGEONING WEAPON FROM THAT WRECKED VEHICLE OVER THERE
>>18703744
probably shermans, seeing how prone it was to go up in flames

>>18703744
Tommycookers

>>18703749
Killydisc Time, nobody can killydisk quite like us.

>>18703749
>KillyDisc
It worked before.

> capacitance coil
>capacitance
>coil

PLANEFAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAG

AMAZING, i tell you!
find appropriate kinetic missile to done flung at yon hewmans!

>MY KILLYDISC TALENTS ARE AMAZING


Yeah I'm going with that.

>>18703749
>MY KILLYDISC TALENTS ARE AMAZING
I don't know what we're gonna throw, but it's the quickest way to save him.

>>18703749
Killydisc. All day, erry day.

"bye d'rr'p!"

BEAT THE HUMER

WITH OUR GUN

>>18703749
SECRET ALIUM DISTRACTION TECHNIQUE: TENTACLE MOONWALK!

Catches on fire? That's how you know it's the Sherman™ seal of Quality.

>>18703796
Is that a Metroid?

Throw slug-thrower, win everything.

>>18703857
"WE HAVE MORE TANKS THAN YOU HAVE AMMO. YOU HAVE TO BE LUCKY EVERYTIME. WE ONLY HAVE TO BE LUCKY ONCE."

>>18703779
Operation Sealion/Unthinkable brand cigars. They taste... like althist?

>>18703865
i wish/see the resemblance
water balloon, actually

>>18703865
I thought the same thing. It looks like a water balloon in mid-pop

its really strange to see SWQ this slow

Blame waifufags?

>>18703965
Perrine hijack?

>>18703965
severe lack of waifu arguing

i like it

>>18703965
Nothing to discuss.

>>18703985
no

>>18703975
>inb4 D'rr'p is female, so is her friend, H'rr'p

>>18703857

satans grandmother Dimitri! I TOLD you not to fuck the comissar's sister?

>>18703749

You spring over to the downed human vehicle and wrench something off the back of it with all your might. For a second, you consider using it as a bludgeon, but then you remember.

YOUR KILLYDISC SKILLZ.

ARE.

HUGE.

With the bar of iron in your grasp, you draw back your tentacle and whip it at the charging human as hard as possible. It whistles through the air and CLANGS! off the humans metal hat with the force of ten-thousand angry females in season.

The human stumbles, looks around dizzily, and drops his weapon. D'rr'p finishes loading, snatches up the iron bar, and comes flumphing over to you as fast as possible.

"What the shit," he asks you breathlessly.

"KILLYDISC EARTH CHAMPION," you declare, snatching back your metal bar. You run a tentacle down its length approvingly. It's got a hooky thing at one end, and a flat pokey end on the other. Hot damn.

>>18704009
D'rr'p is a total bitch. We need to go make out with H'rr'p.

>>18703987
>shakenbabysyndrome.jpg

>>18704020
>Hook thing
I love you so much.

>>18704020
>CROWBAR ACQUIRED

We Freeman Now

>>18704020
ERF CHAMP

>>18703965

Judging from archive votes like half the readers bailed.

>TRUDEFAG EXODUS

sorry guys I can only fit in so many touching heart-to-heart characterization scenes in a thread~

>>18704020
hl_riff.wav

>>18704020
>. It's got a hooky thing at one end, and a flat pokey end on the other.

Truly an elegant weapon in it's killy-ness

ABSCOND, ABSCOND

>>18704045
It's not bailing, I just forgot I was here...

>>18704020
Ahahah, Gap an Elf, you make me laugh...

>>18704020
>Crowbar

>>18704045
We don't have much of a discussion point in this thread. The next one is Thursday right?

>>18704045
>Gashunk
>>18704020
we freelium now

>>18704045
pft! they're missing out. the last half dozen threads have been awesome! and i can't wait to find out the result of the clash of the swag-titans

>>18704045


>implying they wont be back half fighting a fight thats all over next week.

>>18704045
You had to shoehorn that one in pretty hard, so in addition to the trudefags and the antiminnas, I'd guess some people just couldn't put up with your lovable choo-chooing anymore.

Is that why you had Cupcakeski show up? Trying to get another waifu in the mix?

>>18704045
What? Votes have been pretty much always at 25-35.

>>18704045
I thought all the Trudefags were excited at the prospect of fucking Cupcakeski to ruin the Minna route?

Actually fuck it, I don't give a shit.

>>18704124
Cupcakeski would be funnier. Minna is too real for me, but still better than Trude.

>>18704113
Check the votecounts for the thread where Minna finally confessed her feelings. It's got a score of like 25, but somewhere over 65 votes.

>>18704113
Check the number of votes on those two threads, though. Somebody had to work overtime to get them back up to that range. Which is sort of cheap, to be honest; people are entitled to express their opinion there.

>>18704045
We still love you, we are just getting ready for the cup-pocolypse next week

>>18704111
choo-choo was necessary if MC or story was to develop beyond HURR and/or DURR

>>18704111

>antiminnas

yo, bro we aint gone.

but there comes a time to just strike the colors and wait for the BOUNCE parts, ya know?

Cupcakeski has her own unit, it's just a one time HOT STEAMY SESSION OF PURE PILOT LOVE MAKING

>>18704124
No, those were the anti-minnas.

>>18704149
It wouldn't have been necessary if he weren't going for a Minna route.

>>18704155
Hey, I want a Minna end and I'm totally on board with SWAG BATTLE OF THE CENTURY with Cupcakeski.

And by that I mean fucking so hard the aliums feel it. In MARS.

>>18704020

You finally limp back to the perimeter of the besieged landing force. The Edmund Fitzgerald is still burning, but even as you watch engineering teams are cutting away huge segments of the hull for the autolathes that have already been unshipped. Many soldiers were burned in the evacuation, but the crucial equipment has been unloaded.

You look at the towering column of thick, oily smoke climbing into the sky in the middle distance, and wish, with all your brain, that you could hate those three crazy-ass humans to death.

Right. To. Death.

"HEY!" Shouts another martian. Unlike you and D'rr'p, he's resplendent in a shiny flight harness and he's got his sun-visors on.

Fucking pilots.

"What the hell do you want?"

"Don't get your tentacles in a knot," he chuffs. "I was sent to... what the hell is that?"

'That' is the whistle of incoming earthling artillery shells. You spring for the moron pilot and collide with him bodily, knocking him into the nearest huntyhole. Somehow, you manage to land on the hilt of the entrenching tool some miserable, fucking, useless asshole left in the god-damned fighting position.

"OH NO OH SHIT OH FUCK" the pilot is screaming.

"IF YOU DON'T SHUT UP-"

*WHAM!*

"-I'LL GIVE YOU SOMETHING TO SCREAM ABOUT!" you yell at him as shells begin to detonate around you.

D'rr'p joins you in the hole, and you're pressed into the entrenching tool even harder.

>>18704155
>pilot
>"love" making
ha

>>18704155
Haha. Just keep telling yourself that.

>>18704134
Huh. I don't think I've ever seen someone actually dislike Trude before. Not want to fuck her, sure, but not dislike her.

>>18704185
>kircheis
DON'T YOU FUCKING DARE.

>>18704020

>>18704171
So you would prefer the 'drinking yourself to death, alone' end?

>>18704185
Guys, meet H'rr'p

>>18704149
this. PF's railroading has kept us alive and moved MC beyond functionally retarded, so I'm okay with it

>>18704171
male-bovine supplied plant fertilizer. all BOUNCE, no plot = bad story. some games are good that way, but not stories. all action, all dice rolls, no reason why, no motivation, no changes... not fun long-term

>>18704185
>rape

>>18704217
>crowbar with a right angle
Icantfaptothis.jpg

>>18704185

"GRAB HIS TENTACLES" D'rr'p shouts, and both of them manage to pin you down before you can ram the hilt of the shovel into the pilot in ways that are neither sanitary nor comfortable. You scream and swear and shout as they hold you down and the artillery shells explode. Finally, after about five pounds of dirt has been deposited atop you by near-misses, the horrible deafening nightmare ceases.

"... I don't know if you were louder, or the artillery was," D'rr'p says.

"Are you frustrated?" asks the pilot.

The shriek of artillery rockets scream into the night sky nearby as your own gunners begin counter-battery fire.

>YOU'RE DAMN RIGHT I'M FRUSTRATED.
>Feign unrustled jimmies... until they let you up.
>No. No, you got it out of your system.

>Also, who the fuck are you?

>>18704250
Pilot is K'rr'chs

>>18704198
Trude so far has been drunk Minna with abandonment issues. I'd rather the other choice at least be different.

>Feign unrustled jimmies... until they let you up.

>>18704250

nod and make nice sounds till they let us up.


>but then

>>18704250
Feign unrustled jimmies.

>>18704223
>>18704238
I'd prefer that to the poor attempt at some out of character sappy emotional scene that he pulled out of nowhere when everyone was interested in doing something else. Other waifu options were available, and you don't even need one to advance the plot.

>>18704198
what are you talking about

>>18704250
No. No, you got it out of your system.

We can't let a pilot frustrate us, if our reaction to a pile of heavily armed humans was to calmly close the door this guy has no chance.

>>18704250
>fake status:unrustled

>Feign unrustled jimmies... until they let you up.
>Also, who the fuck are you?

>>18704267
What were we gonna do? Search for Yoshika? Fuck with people? It was 2 in the morning and we were drunk. Nothing good or desirable was gonna come of it.

I am enjoying this gaiden so much.

>>18704267
It didn't seem OOC to me. There is more to MC than fighting and bouncing. It's a little bit hidden, but it's there.

>>18704284
I can't believe people were so ardently going to Tesla - Fucking TESLA man - and seeing his experimental sci-fi shit.

>>18704305
ardently against even.

>>18704267
It was pretty in character if you ask me. MC had already started realizing how his crazy deathwish style of fighting would affect everyone else if he actually did end up dead, especially after his sister transferred over. Plus we knew that Minna went up there all the fucking time, so everyone voting for checking the tower walked right into it.

>>18704284
>What were we gonna do?
Don't you remember? Pretty much everyone was interested in finding Robin, and even wanted to ignore Minna and keep on walking when we bumped into her. We still haven't talked to her since we found out about her being a witch.

>>18704313
We want to fuck. Sorry.

>>18704250
remain unrustled [x]

>>18704250
>before you can ram the hilt of the shovel into the pilot in ways that are neither sanitary nor comfortable.

Feign an unrustled state

>>18704250
>No. No, you got it out of your system.
Fucking hell, we haven't EATEN yet. Let's ditch these two and get to the mess.

>>18704328
Patton says no

>>18704321
>Plus we knew that Minna went up there all the fucking time
Oh please. One offhanded comment back in thread fucking 5 or something, and somehow everyone's supposed to understand that towers = Minna. No.

>>18704341
When was the last time Tower =/= Minna?

>>18704305
>>18704313
Yeah, that struck me as really weird. I don't know what's gotten into people. Maybe it was all the Trudefags who were the proper pilot types.

>>18704328
I thought it was clear by then that that wasn''t going to happen any time soon. Besides, most people were harping on about having to go round up all the young witches.

No. No, you got it out of your system.

>>18704341
Yes, everyone is, because it's been said, and we even used it as justification to come to the conclusion that Minna knew about Chris being missing, because she spends her spare time up in the towers.

>>18704341
Oh for fuck's sake. It had been well established already that the towers were Minna's haunt.

"I'm... fine. Just... had to get it out of my system."

"Fine." They let you up, and help haul you out of the huntyhole.

"So, who are you two?"

You and D'rr'p introduce yourself.

"And you?"

"S'pss K'dt, Pilot Third Class," he tells you. "Command wants to debrief you."

"What the hell for?" you ask dubiously.

"Damned if I know, man. I just work here."

"Shit!" you say, tilting your head towards the sky. "Do you hear that?"

They listen.

"No?"

"Worth a shot," you say, and shove them both tentacles-over-skullcase inot the huntyhole, and kick that fucking shovel back in after them, for good measure.

Then you go looking for some eats.

>CHICKENSHIT OUTFIT

>>18704360
>the Trudefags who were the proper pilot types.

they clearly weren't full time waifu faggots so its plausible.

>>18704381
>S'pss K'dt
PLANEFAAAAAAAAAG