So how many Quest threads could we fit in a B-52?

Flight plan, file it.

>>17664907
We're making all the friends! So many new friends.

>>17664907

Yay! New Thread! *orgasms*

>>17664907

We're getting a DFC. He can't fucking touch us. We're god! Cease that puke feeling immediately!

>>17664907

"Oh, don't feel bad," she says airily. "So nice of you to save a damsel in distress. You've got a real knack for it, don't you? It always turns out so well."

You seethe. You just pissed off God's adjundant on her behalf and she's giving you shit for it. "You have my report," you say hotly, leaving the "am I dismissed?" implied.

"I don't have the half of it," Minna says. She sighs, rubbing her temples, and you marvel at the woman you see before you. None of the frenzied wrath or shock or emotion you saw in the day prior - just rock-solid efficiency and some exasperation. "Is there anything else you wanted to tell me, pilot?"

>Wat say?

oh no we made an officer mad, the sun musta risen in the east this morning.

also, file that flight plan.

We're a liaison officer, chances are people will be so confused by our chain of command, nothing will happen.

>>17665000
Bye.

Proceed to leave.

No fucks given. Tell her we are going to christchurch. Then pick up our hootch.

>>17665000

Flight plan. Play it totally cool. Infact, look annoyed that we have to go up again. If she guesses the reason for the flight, bribe her with beer.

>>17665000
Salute.

Seriously. It'd confuse the shit out of her.

Fighting with Minna thread? Fighting with Minna thread.

We need fight music.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=20D3jCyztm0

tell her that the mechanics are giving are plane the once over, and we wanna take a test flight to christchurch and pick up our shit from our old base.

Official OST:

"I'm a pilot"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iM3vLer6YFg

"Hair of the Dog"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kyXz6eMCj2k

"Zero"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XKDzOnRydWk

So we pissed off some stuck-up Limey bastard in charge of RAF Fighter Command. Whoopity-fucking-doo.

We are officially outside of his chain-of-command, nominated (and likely receiving) the DFC from the US military, I think we've been nominated for another award from the Brits anyway (or the Germans maybe?), we've impressed both Patton AND Rommel, and shot down 5 martians in a day in a twin-engined NIGHT FIGHTER.

In other words.....They see me rollin'....they hatin'

>>17665000
We got flight plan to file. There's still some problems with the prototype we got saddled with, and we need to take it on another test flight to check out the repairs the ground crew did.

Aw yeah. And I thought we won't fill our daily quota of insubordination.

>>17665000

THIS:
>>17665054
It will be hilarious

>>17665000

request permission to leave base and receive repairs at the other base.

And speaking of Limey bastards....where's Monty to come claim credit for it all, only to later fuck up a major operation?

>>17664907
We're thirsty, and Sakamoto stole the last of our liquid refreshment. We mush away to resupply. Oh, and the engineers were checking over a problem with the new engines... we want to verify operations and such.

>>17665054
completely and utterly this.

Sakabroto would probably be up for a booze run.
We can practice our tanker idea.

For those who need images:

>>1784117

Shitshitshitshit. I posted the wrong Minna fight song. I meant this one:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ckw_U86ordc

>>17665139
Shit, Screwed that up:
>>>/c/1784117

fuck promotions anyway.

>ualkpli consumeth
see captcha wants us to get that beer cold too.

>>17665054
Oh yes, definitely include this.
We don't give any fucks, but trolling and messing with a CO's head is always on the menu.

>>17665054
>>17665096
>>17665125
Milifag here. All that means is we are about to walk out of the room in this situation. In other words, not actually trolly.

>>17665000

Tell her about test flight to test repair job

Oh god, looking up Leigh-Mallory he's basically a huge assbag. We're getting politically fucked later, I tell you.

"just doing my part to avoid a promotion to desk pilot"

>>17665181
yes bvut she expects us to act like asshats.
we act like civil people for once her brain will melt. then we walk away cackling like madmen.

>>17665181
Yeah, I don't think saluting would really work here. We could start addressing her as Sir, though, maybe Minna Sir or the like.

>>17665181
>>17665054
>>17665000
Salute her before we leave
Get that flight plan filed and be respectful about it, just to fuck with her

>>17665214
Call her Wilka.

>>17665000
Apologize.

It will freak the fuck out of her.

Some of these suggestions are just downright stupid and childish. We need to do all of them.

>>17665181
To a military officer, maybe. But Minna's shown us that she's still overly emotional.

She'll be expecting us to be an asshat, and will be confused out of her skull when we suddenly start behaving in a thoroughly respectful and military manner.

>>17665187

But that would be punishment, so screwing with him could land us a desk job

>>17665231
This, would work.

>>17665231
fine we will allow the white knight faggotry for one moment in the NAME OF TROLLING!

Why in the name of all that is fuck, did we decide to stick our dick in the Brass Hornet Nest again?

>>17665237
>>17665201
>Asshatmind

>>17665249
We're Army Air Corps which means we answer to Eisenhower not the RAF.

"Actually, I need to file a flight plan for tonight. With your permission, I'm heading back to Christchurch."

"Well. It's been nice knowing you, Lieutenant."

You frown. "Me and my crew are picking up my things."

Minna glares at you. "And why would you be doing that?"

"Because we're staiiiiaaaah fuck."

Minna keeps glaring. "Sakamoto has big ears. I might have to trim them." From the plain irritation in her tone you guess it's an empty threat. At the very least she doesn't suspect that you were eavesdropping.

You think.

"Very well. Get the paper on my desk and I'll stamp it. Is that all?"

"Yes sir."

You think you see a hint of disappointment in her eyes, but it's gone in a moment. "Very well. Dismissed."

You salute. "Jawhol, Commandant." Minna's mouth drops open at your sudden and unexpected display of subordination.

That lasts about two seconds, before you spin on your heel and stomp away with a perfectly executed goose-step. You hear the memo pad whistling through the air a second to late to duck, and it smacks you in the back of the head smartly.

Totally worth it.

>What now? Possible exits include:
>To the Kitchen
>To the Lounge
>To your bedroom
>To somebody else's bedroom

>>17665285
Isn't the lounge empty?

THE COUCH IS OURS NOW.

>>17665285
STEAL HER MEMO PAD.

We have Rommel's lighter and Minna's memo pad. Soon, SOON, we will have all the artifacts.

>>17665285
>To somebody else's bedroom
Go on.

>>17665320
And together, they shall form...

>>17665285

to our bedroom. need some sleep if were gonna make a flight tonight huh?

>>17665285
>Goto Minna's room
Come up with an excuse why to troll Minna

>>17665285
Shirley's bedroom. We never finished our conversation.

>>17665320

Seconded! The memo pad is now ours!

Also, what time is it? We're flying to Christchurch tonight. How much time before then?

>>17665337
>>17665338

One of these.

get that flight plan done and OBTAIN BOOZE FROM MAINLAND

Anyone suggesting this isn't priority #1 needs their head checked.

>>17665320
THIS!

>>17665285
YES, SO MUCH GLORIOUSNESS!
really though take the memo pad, head to where we were gonna go.

>>17665338
second

>>17665285
To all the bedrooms. We need to check up on everyone in case of, you know, another sneak attack.

>>17665285
Someone elses bedroom. Preferably Minnas.

>>17665285

> someone else's bedroom

Haha time for trolling

Anyone know a good chan app for Android tablets? Chant drops my trip after every post

to the lounge. gotta kill time somehow. maybe someone who dosent hate us will talk to us there.

>>17665285
Kitchen.
Did we even eat, at all? Because I don't think we have, at least, not since those blueberries and milk from...whenever.

>>17665285
To the kitchen, we haven't had anything since the blueberries. A shower might be nice too once in a while.

>>17665337
>Come up with an excuse
Psssht. Who said anything about reasons?

>>17665364
I use chandroid but it's not tablet optimized I don't think.

I kinda wonder what we could get the Frenchy to do by using Sakamoto's name.....

>>17665385
I didn't say to come up with an reason because we have to, but because if we keep showing up with logical reasons, it will freak her out even more.

>>17665439
We have her notepad.

>>17665439
Let's get the flight plan form done, and wait with it in her room.

lets go eat that carrot casserole.

whatever the fuck that is.

>>17665464
>Walk in
>take off outer clothes so as not to get her room dirty
>Stand just in door at attention
>wait

>>17665361
We should check all the dressers for infiltrating neuroi.

>>17665464

> forge love letter from Minna to Sakamoto on her notepad
> leave it somewhere frenchie will find it
>???
> profit

>>17665516
>>17665516
>>17665516

>>17665516

>>17665488
Minna: "Why are you in my room:
You: "I needed to return your notepad"
Minna "Was it necessary for you to be half naked this?"
You: "Yes Sir"

>>17665541
"Well i didn't want this to be weird or anything"

>>17665541
"I obviously didn't want you to feel left out on the whole pants thing."

>>17665541
The second we're officially transferred to this base we need to wander around in full dress uniform sans pants at least once. Just, you know, because that's apparently the standard uniform here.

>>17665516

>>17665541
You: Someone seems to think I've got magic... I'm trying to dress the part.
Minna: By going shirtless
You: not getting the pants.

>>17665361
Yes. Also figure out which bedroom we crashed in the other night.

>>17665533
I have nothing useful to contribute other than dude that Image made me rage slightly.. THAT IS NOT A JIB YOU DOOFUS..

>>17665572
no we just lose the pants because that seems to be the uniform here.

>>17665572
>at least once
If by that you mean EVERY GODDAMN DAY.

>>17665541
>>17665541
>>17665541
>>17665541

>>17665382
>A shower might be nice
You just reminded me what the bathrooms are like in strike witches.

I also suggest a bath.

>>17665585
Not like we can really see enough of the boat to tell.

>>17665598
So I'm not the only one wearing his sister's panties to get into these threads better right ?

>>17665585
It's not cut either. And it's probably not actually his. The picture is basically just lies upon lies.

>orders ewslug

Really, captcha? We need to go to the garden, find slugs and slip them in Minna's bed?

>>17665572

>>17665555
These quads are a sign that the universe wants us to take off our pants off to troll minna.

Minna's room. No pants. Now

>>17665619
Nothing could possibly go wrong with this plan

>>17665285
We SHOULD apologize to those lolis for napping on their bed.

Snatching up Minna's memo pad, you go sprinting down the hallway as fast as possible. You've got a truly wicked idea for how to return it later and get some (more) of your own back, but for now, you have a flight to Christchurch to prepare for.

That means sleep. But first, food. There's some carrot casserole in the kitchen that's calling to you, and you think it's time to devour it.

As you approach the kitchen, you hear outraged voices. Well, one outraged voice. A rather squeaky, high-pitched voice. Patton.

"-egless cripple, I'm gonna rip off his stilts and ram them up his nostrils. See how much bullshit we get out of him then!"

"Has the great Patton met his match?" answers a German voice.

"Like hell! The day I'm out-maneuvered by stumpy is the day I build a fort and sit in it!"

"That works sometimes, you know."

"The hell it does!"

"It took me forever to get into Tobruk."

"But you got in! Just like I'm going to get the POINT into the skull of that limey bastard..."

The voices diminish, and you enter the kitchen once it's safe.

>>17665516
All of my yes! Do it! Do it!

>>17665672

Oh boy is it Rommel time?

Greet them with respect. Don't mention the lighter.

>>17665719

Rommel time is all the time.

>>17665672

Wait......only one man can vex Patton like that....


MONTGOMERY LOST HIS LEGS!


BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

That Limey bastard's more overrated than MacArthur

>>17665672
Time for some pancakes! The dinner of aces!

>>17665672
Hey Romel, sorry about keeping you lighter. I still have it if you want it back.

>>17665741

No! No giving away our loot!

>>17665759

Agreed. Bounce witches, fly planes, acquire relics

The MC is vain-glorious, proud, hoards treasure, murders all opposition and flies like a bat out of hell.

Is his callsign Dragon?

because walking around a military base full of teenage girls in skintight, bottomless uniforms is a really good idea

>>17665796

No, it's Goose

>>17665804
That does not bode well.

>>17665798

It is THE BEST idea.

Witches don't know 'bout our '20mm hispano"

>>17665672

You eye the refrigerator dubiously, and try the cabinets first. To your delight there's plenty of bread to be had, and a bratwurst soon reveals itself. Soon after you're fixing yourself a truly massive sammich.

"You again."

You look over your shoulder and see Charlotte. She's holding a bag of groceries.

"The officers do the shopping?"

"Minna doesn't like having too much male personnel on base," Charlotte explains, setting the bag on the big mess table.

You grunt, and bite into your sammich. "Minna doesn't seem big on males, period." You waggle your eyebrows suggestively.

"Or so Perrine hopes," Charlotte says. "Ian better hope so, too."

You shrug. "What's the fallout from the attack last night? Politically."

Charlotte shrugs. "The usual. Everybody got hit, so they're all blaming each other's strategies for the failure and claiming their own pet projects would have saved the day." She plops down in the chair opposite the one you've claimed, and stares at you long enough to make you feel awkward.

>>17665804
Thinking of, why havent we buzzed a control tower yet? Seems right up our alley

>>17665827
We are safe, as we lack DFC. Wait... shit.

>crking BRAT

IT KNOWS

>>17665827

waggle the bratwurst enticingly towards Charlotte, with a shit-eating grin on our faces

>>17665827
Stare back. Tell her she can't have your sandwich.

>>17665827

>"Or so Perrine hopes,"

wait, isnt she hot for sakamoto? whys she care if minna is homo?

also, stareing contest.

>>17665827
Fuck you, I at least deserve a sandwich.

>>17665849
"Want some of my sausage, Sir?"

>>17665850

this

>>17665850
This. Offer to show her how MEN make sammichez though.

>>17665877
>>17665850
>>17665849
YES

>>17665827
Do a cheep magic trick and follow up with a "Tada!"

That'll teach her to question your wizardry.

>>17665866
Minna isn't homo, her boyfriend died and she went: Love is over!

>>17665906

yes, but im asking why perrine has any opinion about it.

>>17665840
We've landed all of three times so far in this quest. Our plane at the time has so far been consistently unhappy at one time or another.

>>17665890
Lets put it all together:

"Want some of my sausage, Sir?"
...
"Well, You can't. This is my sandwich. Now stop staring at me"

>>17665906
His name is Kurt Flachfeld, by the way.

>>17665906

More like "Oh god, losing someone to war is horrible! Time to ban all men I can from my base so my witches don't form relationships and lose them!"

But then like half the witches just go lesbian. so that didn't really work.

>>17665967

Curt Flatfield? Makes sense why he liked Minna.

>>17665930
She doesn't want any filthy men near her beloved Sakamoto?

>>17665960
Fine, but drop the sir, we arent adressing a superior, for a change.

>>17665930
Well, if Minna and Sakabroto are besties, maybe Frenchie is hoping that Minna is mired in homolust because that means there's more of a chance between her and Sakamoto? Or maybe she doesn't want more male competition? Or maybe she's fucking crazy?

>>17665990
Too bad for Perrine then.

>>17665980
Pretty much what I meant. Damn, now I want an image of the NO FUN robot, but with Minna and the sign reading NO MEN ALLOWED.

Out of curiosity, where may I observe previous threads of this magnificent campaign?

>>17666026
http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=strike%20witches

>>17666026

On sup/tg/

>>17666026

First thread: http://archive.foolz.us/tg/thread/17545010/
Second: http://archive.foolz.us/tg/thread/17563929/
Rest: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=Strike%20Witches%20Quest

>>17666026
first thread: http://archive.foolz.us/tg/thread/17545010/
remaining threads here:
>>17666030

>>17666030
>>17666031

Thank you fine Sirs.

>>17666057

Except that skips a whole thread. Whoever started archiving the threads derped and started at two instead of three.

>>17666030
>>17666031
>>17666056
>>17666057
>>17666064
>that feel when /a/ would just point and laugh at you
I love you /tg/

>>17666031
Pssst, lots of /a/nons here who don't know we have our own wiki or archive.

>>17666068

the second thread is on suptg too, its just tagged 'strike witches' and not 'strike witches quest' cause someone dumb archived it.

>>17666075
>mfw I provide sauce on /a/ too if the poster has the common decency to ask properly.

>>17665869
>>17665866
>>17665850
>>17665849

You chew your prize grimly, staring right back.

"What, you want some of my bratwurst?"

Charlotte doesn't blink.

"Can't have any."

She doesn't *breathe.*

"I deserve a single sammich, god dammit!"

"So I hear you're flying to Christchurch," Charlotte says.

"No you don't."

"Your crew told me."

You say something incredibly unflattering about your crew into your sammich. Charlotte reaches into her bosom and produces a small, folded piece of paper. She slides it across the table to you. "There's some things I could use in Christchurch. I've already given some government pay-slips to Ian - I trust he can keep them safe."

You grunt, and look at the list. Various foodstuffs - only to be expected - tools, and other sundry small items that will be easy to cram into the Widow somewhere. And-

"-a pair of handcuffs? A stethoscope? And a silk robe? What the hell is this? I can't exactly get this at the PX, you know."

"You'll find a way."

"In a few hours? No, I don't think so. Not on my salary, at any rate."

"You will," says a smooth, cold voice from behind you, "-because Charlotte convinced me it was a demanding enough task to apologize for almost ruining my life."

You blink. "Perrine is right behind me, isn't she."

"And she's got a gun!" Charlotte says, beaming at you.

TUNE IN THURSDAY FOR: GRAND THEFT ERRYTHING!

>>17666072
More like a thousand boku no pico replies. /a/ is tsuntsun
> but I love it

>>17666102

Oh, hey. Look at that.

Hm. Been awhile since the post. I expect godtier trolling and counter-trolling sexual innuendo.

I keep worrying OP is dead, but then I realize he'd at least have the decency to post jibberish before he kicked the bucket.

>>17666133
Are we having sex with Charlotte now?

>>17666146

Sorry. 5 hours of sleep will do that to a man. Some nights it's hard to keep chugging along. I work in a shitty gas station (tomorrow) so I've got plenty of time to plan the next thread however; Thursday should move along at a decent clip. Till then!

>>17666133

Thursday?! I don't think I can last that long!

>>17666133

perrine cant be trusted with handcuffs. dont do it!

or at least get two copies of the key and keep one.

>>17666133
>"And she's got a gun!" Charlotte says, beaming at you.

Ah, what a tangled web we weave, when first we practice to troll.

>>17666133
NOBODY LIKES YOU PERRINE

>>17666107
Bit of a tangent, but perhaps you should show them the reverse image lookups instead? Teach a man to fish and all that.

>>17666172

All that shit is for Perrine.

Note, however, that handcuffs, silk robes and stethoscopes are all, ah, multi-purpose items. Especially silk. It's like natural kevlar, and that's before you add magic to it...

>>17666133
Armed robbery together with a little girl?

This could be fun.

>>17666174

the whole every day thing you were doing is a good way to get burnout too. twice or thrice a week is plenty. IMO anyway.

>>17666133
> have to wait two days for moar
Damn I keep forgetting this feeling. Guess I'm back to my project then. God speed planefag, you made my night.

>>17666133
>TUNE IN THURSDAY FOR: GRAND THEFT ERRYTHING!

>>17666186
This, I watched the series, and all I could tell of Perrine is that she is a complete bitch.

Oh, Planefag. I love you anyway. Even if I have to wait so long between threads now.

Onto other things: What the hell is frenchy going to do with all that? Rape us?

ah hell, someones gonna catch us with perrines crap and were gonna be in trouble.

oh well, i guess we can just say perrine asked us to buy it. that'll work right?

>>17666229

They might believe us actually. Everyone but Sakamoto knows about her stalkercrush.

Also why the hell do we have to apologize? She was attempting to suffocate us!

>>17666194

All these images of Minna just make me want to see her go totally crazy/yandere at some point.

>>17666192
I usually do and even I don't reply if it's so blatantly obvious that even a lobotomized chimp could find the source.

>>17666261

it would be terrifying.

>>17666229
That'd be ideal, actually. We want them to think we're fucking Perrine, because it'll piss her off. We totally need to come up with some way to sexualize her having a gun right now.

>>17666280
Wat

Alright guys, how many witches can we fit in a b-52?

she said i had to buy it... as a punishment...

>>17666296

"Perrine dear, usually I'm the one with the long hard object. But I guess we could give role reversal a try."

>>17666305

Quite a lot. You just have to throw them in a blender first.

>>17666280
Oh god, not the ass of destruction!

>>17666311

THIS

>>17666229

The issue is we don't know what sizes she wears and given she is holding a gun, which ought to be easy enough to sexualize, some droll about if she's holding it then she gets to decide when it shoots. Either way, I feel this would be a matter settled by having a picture of her when out shopping, so long as there is a scale reference, not only will it allow for getting the right size robes, but you are also buying seriously suspect gear for a woman who you have a picture of and probably not wearing any pants either.

>>17666311
>>17666314

yeah you gotta remember, it is official strike witches canon that something crawled up minnas ass and died.

>>17666314

On the plus side if she shoots up, we get the Purple Heart along with the DFC.

>>17666353
WHY DOES ANYONE CREATE IMAGES LIKE THIS
GOD
FUCKING
DAMN EVERYTHING

>>17666377
Because nobody likes Perrine

>>17666280
Strangely, I'd be fine with that.

Actually, I'd be fine with pretty much anything involving pantsless witches.

>>17666377
One of the reasons is to get that reaction from people.

>>17666402
Unf

Yanderewitch mite b cool

>>17666353
Most alluring death trap ever.

Here's bespectacled Minna, with pantyhose even

>>17666478

flustered trude and super flustered helma are still both more interesting.

>that feel when I spent the last hour and a half getting up to speed
>update
>thread just finished

Well fuck.

>>17666901
wait, the last post was about an hour ago.

Apparently I've been at this longer than I thought.

>>17666911

Yeah. It's kinda dead in here. Usually a big of discussion afterwards.

Hope the requester is still here.

>see this quest
>never seen the anime or read the manga

Is this worth picking up? I know its MAGIC and all, but pantsless lolis in propeller-legs is really stretching my suspension of disbelief.

>>17667097
In short?

No.

>>17667097

I watched it after I got into the quest. As long as you go into it not expecting it to be great; it's entertaining.

>>17667137
As someone who did the same, this is exactly right. Think of it as a comedy rather than SUPER SERIOUS CHARACTER DRAMA

>>17667151

And if all else fails. The battles are still pretty cool.

>>17667097
i watched a couple epis, came off as generic creepy fanservice shit. it's like most of the bad cliches people normally think about anime but played seriously. so no.

>>17667189
The crotch shots during flight are pretty funny though.

It's fanservice done wrong and they aren't attempting to be even remotely subtle about it.

>>17667201
>The crotch shots during flight are pretty funny though.

if by funny you mean embarrassing to watch than yes.

i don't like using memes to describe stuff but that was seriously the first time i facepalmed while watching something.

>>17667212
Turning off your brain and taking nothing seriously is practically a requirement for watching strike witches, but if you can't help but find it creepy and embarrassing anyway then that won't matter.

>>17667212
What did you watch it with your grandmother or something?
The only alternative is your self esteem is low enough that you are embarrassed by things you do in private.
Please tell me it is the former.

>>17667256
Ever see someone do something so embarrassing that you felt embarrassed for them? Yeah.

Of course you probably have to get rid of any sense of shame in order to enjoy something like this.

>>17667332
You mean you feel embarrassed for a bunch of cartoon characters?
Fucking weird.

>>17667385
No more weirder than feeling arousal when staring at their crotch.

Like, apparently quite a gathering crowd of people I watched S1 off the back of this quest. It was fucking bizarre but I can't quite bring myself to hate it.

Even the dread Episode Seven amused me because of Erica's utter mastery of Giving-precisely-zero-fucks while the shit she stirred up rages across the base.

>>17667212
I DID say we needed wipers to remove panty ass from our windshield. GODDAMN LOLI CROTCHES GET OUT OF MY WAY TRYING TO KILL ALIUMS

Still not sure if I should watch it or not.

>>17669185
Hang on, is that an actual screengrab of the show?

Wow, what lazy character artists they must have.

>>17670497
Far from actual screenshots.