Be nice if you told everyone in the other thread

Find bro's. Fuck pants

>>17567394

See

>>17567393

Ditch the toga, find bros.

Find Sean and Ian, begin collecting harem.
er, Sean and Ian will not be in the harem.

Check doors at random for bros.

Is there no one in the hallway? Check the first door I come to, if there isn't one directly in front of me, start to my left.

>went with the toga
YES! Anyways, we need to ask someone about Sean. If that fails, we're going door to door.

Go find Sean, see if he is still alive.

Maybe try to play it cool, act as natural as a guy in a sheet toga can

>>17567390
Press X to Sean.

>>17567429

Walk around, nodding and stroking your stubble.

You'll look like a particularly free spirited doctor.

Just remember.
You are an Ace (probably), act like it, no one can stop you, not even the neuroi. Full confidence ahead and damn the social awkwardness.

Ask about your crew
If all odds fail its time to go door to door
Your bros are top priority right now

>>17567390
Ask the nurses about Sean and Ian.

Alright. Priorities are:
Sean
Ian
Food
Clothing
Loot
Plane to get the hell out of here.
Avoiding Command tower at all costs.
Loot.

Find crew.

if anyone challenges us, respond with nothing but questions of where our crew is. They are our crew, they are our responsibility. take us to them now!

>>17567420
Fuck harems, after we find Ian and what is left of Sean, we are blowing this pantsless popsicle stand and fighting more aliens!

[x]Rape the nurses
Just kidding
Go door to door and pray you don't(?) walk in on some witches Dyke'ing it up.

>>17567453
As I read this this song started:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3mDWzu5yxLg&feature=related

Oh yeah, we're badass.

>>17567468
No, no. Change that to: Strafing Command Tower.

>>17567434
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_56257iS77A
Fuck you, I was just watching that.

>>17567456
And maybe check the labels outside of our room and see if we something similar nearby.

Being at least mildly polite (and obviously going to keep up our search regardless and straining hard to not yell at obstacles) is probably better than outright yelling and complete disregard.

Also, I'm assuming we're the only ones in the room, otherwise make sure none of them are our bros, or know where they are.

.>not walking around naked

why

>>17567490
That comes after we're flying off. Until then, we don't want to be anywhere near that place without a plane...

>>17567487
I imagine we'd be more Hair of the Dog
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kyXz6eMCj2k

Find crew.
Find clothes.
Gtfo and back to base.
In that order.

Having just come from the empty medical ward, you know neither of your crewmembers are there. And you doubt they'd be in what looks like the dormitory areas.

That means they're probably recuperating in the lounge areas, kitchen, or... no, if Sean's alive, he's certainly in the kitchen.

You hop down the stairs two at a time, ignoring the pounding pain in your head with each impact, and reach the ground floor. You hear voices coming from one side. One voice carries the Tone Of Authority. You have certain reflexes vis a vis ranking officers, which induce you to take cover behind a row of potted plants.

"-and Yoshika? Put these on him." The clink and rattle of articulated metal reaches your ears.

A young, tremulous voice replies. "But-! But he saved Tru-"

"By being a psycopath," the other voice replies sternly. "Bravery and lunacy can be hard to tell apart sometimes, and until I know for sure, I don't want him running around this place on his own."

The other girl tsks. "He's wounded and exhausted. Who would go running around stark naked after all that?"

You shrink behind the potted plants a little more, fuming.

>reveal?
>lay low?
>follow the boss?

>>17567552
We just landed in the largest collection of single girls for 500 miles.

And you want to leave?

>>17567574
lay low...
try to sneak back to our room before we're missed

>>17567574

Reveal

"A psychopath"

Pop out and ask where the hell coffee and your crew are. Also pants. In that order.

reveal

>>17567574
Bust up and find out where sean is. Don't take no for an answer.

>>17567577
Yes, because their leader is a nutter, she shot at us, and I don't intend to stick around so she can get a second chance at it.

>>17567592
This.

>>17567574
... time to treat it like we ditched behind enemy lines.

>Lay low.

Maybe, just maybe follow the boss.

>>17567574
Lay low and continue on as before.

>>17567574

step out and say hullo. politely ask where are mates are.

How about walking nonchalantly past them? "I would. Where's my crew? I want to blow this popsicle stand." Keep walking. Never stop until objectives have been completed.

>>17567574

Sneak the fuck off and find your bros.

>>17567574

If we had some damn pants I'd say reveal. But wearing a toga isn't exactly going to make us look sane. Lay low, continue searching for Ian and Sean and some damn pants.

If we get the damn pants find someone who isn't that boss and ask for help.

>>17567574
Reveal: "Someone worried about his crew"

Remember, Big Damn Heroes get rewards. Let's not piss off the little ladies too badly now that we're in their stronghold and relatively safe. And this seems like the best way to show some compassion and find out about our bros at the same time quickly.

>>17567574
[x]Reveal
At least allow them to trust you.

>>17567574
Lay low, get clothes, find our crew.

>>17567574
reveal, demand to know what happened to crew

Reveal.

"I resent being referred to as a psychopath. I prefer creatively crazy."

>>17567574
LAY
LOW
We're gonna go Big Boss on this castle. Bust out the stone-pattern camo and face paint.

I honestly don't feel like freaking them the fuck out, they have guns, and I'm allergic to bullets.

Lay Low.

>>17567617
this

We just made ace

We dont take shit from no one

>>17567612
>>17567613
>>17567589

Did you guys forget we just downed 6 or so martians?

We. Are. God.

And we ain't gonna go hide from our god damn praise and respect.

step out and ask for our crew. that comes first. even before freedom.

>>17567617

This is crazy enough to work.

>The clink and rattle of articulated metal reaches your ears.
those are almost certainly handcuffs, people. walking out now ain't gonna stop them from using em on us.

lay low wait, for the girl that was somewhat sympathetic towards to walk by and ask her about our crew

>>17567592
This.

Followed by: "And while I need to find my men and how they're doing, I did at least grab something to wear.
...and I'll wear the damn cuffs if you'll show me where they are and how they're doing first."

>>17567643
Fine fine. I was thinking just lay low and find the crew, but Big Damn Heroes works too.

Officially recanting and converting to the Reveal.

>>17567617
This.
THis this a thousand times this.
For added effect, say nothing and just walk by whistling. Then ask random girl for directions to kitchen.

>>17567669

You think getting cuffed is going to change anything?

We just add that to our debrief... Sorry.. Laughed a bit there...

>>17567669
It's like they sold their sense of self-preservation or something.

>>17567669
What if we hold our hands apart at chest level? Can they even reach that high?

>>17567669
Its been a while since I watched the show, do they even have chain of command over us? I'd always assumed it would be like a Marine trying to pull rank on Army, shit just doesn't work.

Don't take their shit, ask where your bros are.

>>17567694
I lol'd

>>17567669
so what? youshika is dumb she'll probably cuff our hands in front of us. we can handle that.

>>17567689

What sense are you talking about? The one that makes us attack superior forces in a night patrol plane that wasn't made for dogfights and then land on an airstrip while being shot by our supposed allies?

>>17567695

witches can get away with basically anything because big damn heros and lolpropoganda. also minna is a fucking bitch and dosent care.

still, i like our odds in cuffs better then i do our odds of slinking. they can radar us out if they need too.

>>17567719

Hey, we were big damn heros, we should act like it.

Introduce yourself.

>>17567695
While a possibility, chances are she may well be the base commander. And we're on her base. When we're not really supposed to be here.
So I'd say that's not something to pull except out of direst last resort. Chances are it's a bluff and will invite all hell even if it's not.

>>17567719
We were fucked, sense of self-preservation is out the window when we are that boned.

>>17567574

"Start naked my dying ass," you snort, leaping out from behind the potted plants.

A young girl, whom you take to be Yoshika, leaps away from you so fast she falls on her ass, then scrabbles backwards in shock. The other one, a pretty redhead in a green officer's coat, takes a step back in surprise, but stands her ground.

"Sh-sh-sh-sheet!" Yoshika stammers, blushing furiously.

"To-GA," you say slowly and deliberately. "Just like the Roman engineers that first built this place, in fact," you continue, gesturing to the castle about you. "I dare say I'm more dignified then you are right now, miss no-pants."

The leggy redhead steps in front of her stammering colleague. "Do you know who I am?" she demands angrily.

You stroke your chin thoughtfully, trying to remember everything that proceeded the Big Ouch in your skull. "Smalltime," you say, snapping your fingers as recollection alights.

There's a strangled giggle from the floor, and the redheads face flushes dangerously.

"I am Wing Commander Minna-Dietlinde Wilcke of the Luftwaffe, JG-3, and you, mister, are one more word away from a court-martial!"

>Fucks given?

>>17567765
>Fucks given?

0

>>17567765
Let us give a demifuck.

>>17567765
>Smalltime
>This niggah

>>17567765
if commnder.personality= Bitch
then fuck.given = 0

That's nice, where the fuck is my crew?'

None.

>>17567765

None given today.

ZERO!

*mashes F5*

>>17567765
Not a single one.

>>17567765
Negative 10 billion point two.

>>17567765
not a single

>>17567765
Not. A. One.

"You can court-marshal me when I've seen my crewmates."

>>17567765

Zero

"I'm three words away from "Hot, Black, Coffee" and two away from "My WIngmen"; Finally, I'm one away from "Ace who saved one of yours from getting spread across the windshield of a martian flying brick".

>>17567765
None.
"Two words."
So that gets us court-martialed, then?

>>17567765

the universe is made out of billions and billions oof fucks.

im still not giving that bitch any.

>>17567765
0

Bitch just hasn't had a good dicking in a while.

>>17567765
NOT.
ONE.

She can court martial us to hell and back once we figure out the status of our glorious comrades.

>>17567765
Fucks given count.

For her: Zero
For our crew: Every single one

Where is our crew? Our crew, where are they? Whereu. Isu. Maiu. Crewu?

>>17567801
This.

>>17567765

F5F5F5F5

COMON

>>17567765

neat. wheres my crew?

>>17567826
I like this one

>>17567765

/r/ the one picture with f5's lined up on a runway

>>17567826
>>17567826
>>17567826
pretty much this

>>17567839
Here ya go.

>>17567826


Oh god my sides. Fucking. Do. It.

>>17567765
See the pretty picture? This is our pilot. There are zero fucks.

>>17567826
You are the hero this thread needs.

>>17567765
"Court-martial? For performing an emergency landing while under fire, after having saved one of your Witches from being plastered all over the Channel?
"Wing-Commander, I would like to know the status of my crew and plane, considering that there is a war that I need to go back to."

>>17567765

Just remember fellows, Minna doesn't need a gun to kill something.

SPOILER: She killed a Alien bug with her ass

>>17567882
In addition to this, can we politely ask her who gave the order to open fire on a plane with wounded crew making an emergency landing?

>>17567765
>>17567774
>>17567778
>>17567782
>>17567784
>>17567787
>>17567791
>>17567793

"Big words from the bitch who was SHOOTING AT ME," you growl, as you remember something else.

"Wha- What!?" Minna breathes, shocked. "We - I - nobody -"

"Then what was that fantastical orgasm of flack and shellfire, that blossom of shooty death that greeted me as I tried to land?" you seethe, spreading your hands dramatically to illustrate.

"The - the - what?"

"The anti-aircraft?" Yoshika says, clamoring to her feet, back pressed against the wall. "They were shooting at the aliens following you!"

Oh. That kind of makes sense.

"With three-inch timer-fused flak shells, thanks a whole fucking bunch," you mutter, not about to give any ground in the Lair of the Pantsu. "Where's my crew?"

Minna shakes her head. "You don't ask the questions around here. I do."

"Where's my crew?"

"Stand down, *Lieutenant,*" Minna snarls, and there's enough steel in her voice to send shivers down your spine.

You take a step towards her, your own voice growing dangerously soft. "*My* aircrew, *my* responsibility. Where are my people? Is Sean alive?"

Minna opens her mouth for another hot reply, but Yoshika cuts her off. "They're okay!" she exclaims, all bright and bubbly. "No serious injuries. I can bring you to them!"

"Splendid!" you say, skirting past Minna and streaking down the hallway, Yoshika hustling afterwards, before Minna can react. Yoshika directs you through a few turns, but hauls you up short before you enter the last room.

>>17567917
>In addition to this, can we politely ask her who gave the order to open fire on a plane with wounded crew making an emergency landing?

THIS! SO HARD! I want to see the look on her face.

>>17567938

"Uh, every... everybody's in there," she says shyly. "And you're.... not dressed..."

You pointedly look at her legs, then slowly back up to her face, making the young girl squirm and blush furiously.

"But... but you're a boy, you know?"

You sigh. On one hand, you want to see your people badly, and compared to everything else today, do you really care?

On the other hand, what pilot walks in wearing a toga? Bad enough to not have your flight jacket, but utter blasphemy to be less cool looking then your own aircrew! In front of dames, no less.

>Wat do?

>>17567947
Go in. We have no shame

>>17567947
gotta keep the impetus alive

>>17567947
10 Don't give a fuck
20 goto 10

>>17567947
>implying wandering around in an ad-hoc toga is somehow un-awesome

We are the kings of NO FUCKS GIVEN. Forward!

>>17567912

Witches have super strength but it dosent actually make their bodies any heavier. and they are petite little girls with short petite little girl arms. If it comes to fighting we keep our distance and use throws. Its... better then no plan at all i guess.

>>17567947
I suspect we are headed to the brig shortly. bet to pop in and say hullo. if we go look for some clothes we might not get the chance.

>>17567947
I'm not going to be out scandalized by a girl wearing panties in public. when in rome!

>>17567947

Does she still have those cuffs?

Pull the cloth foward and clip it, close enough to a dressing gown and if Hugh Hefner can do it...

>>17567947
We've probably shared showering rooms with the others in our crew, besides, there's a certain amount of style bucking authority, and walking around the base in a goddamn toga.

>>17567947

In we go! No modesty until we ascertain the health of our crew with our own eyes.

>those image replies

I knew /tg/ would approach quest better then /a/ would. I just knew.

>>17567947
If we're gonna strut in and yell demands, we should at least dress appropriate. Also, no one will take us seriously in a toga.

>>17567947
well, the older something is, the classier it is. The toga is the oldest fashion statment in the civilised world, so you best believe you're gonna be better looking-check for fresh battle scars you can display as you strut into that room like Caesar himself.

>>17567947
>utter blasphemy to be less cool looking then your own aircrew!
Get a pair of pants. And sunglasses.
We are worried enough about them to get our ass blacklisted yes, but there's no way in fuck that we're going in there with a toga.

>>17567938
Yoshika confirmed for bro-tier. Now that we know our crew is okay, ask about the welfare of the Witch who ass we pulled a dozen Martians off.

>>17567947
>On the other hand, what pilot walks in wearing a toga?
The most alpha motherfucking pilot in the US Air Force.

>>17567947
>sheet toga
>less cool looking

Fuck it, we're an American! (we are, right? we do seem to have picked up a fair bit of the brit lingo here)

>>17567947
Our junk is covered, correct? Then enter like the big damn hero we are. Check the room out, then if there are no visible pants turn to Yoshika and politely ask for her to locate some.

Minna can go gag on Martian rockets for all we care.

>>17567938
>what pilot walks in wearing a toga
The best kind

Put Yoshika on your shoulder, kick the door open, and ask them if they are done lollygagging around in bed because as much fun as you're having here, you still have a war to help win.

>>17567996
To hell with the pants, the sunglasses will do though.

>but utter blasphemy to be less cool looking then your own aircrew! In front of dames, no less.
We have to let it slide this time. Gotta make sure they're okay.

And maybe a brofist for the nice little pantless girl for being useful.

"GIRL, we just killed 5 bugs and sent a good number of their train running for mommy, never mind saving some of you. The thanks we get? Denied landing and SHOT AT. I think you have this backwards. We're fucking heros and are going to get us some shiny medals, and YOU'RE getting court marshalled, or spanked, or whatever the fuck it is they do to reprimand retarded actions around here.

>>17567947
Togas are almost as cool as flight jackets, plus we have the fact that we save all of their asses on our side. Go in.

>>17567947

Seems like it's time to find some real duds to wear.

Right now, if we stop we're going to get hauled into the stockade. We need to get our gear, keep moving, ignore Miss No-Pants and her tirade of boring and get off the base and back under a sane military chain of command where the Witches will have to go through layers of unfriendly bureaucracy to get to us.

>>17567947

We should pretend to be in heaven...

Walking in wearing a robe? One hell of a prank

>>17568030
>Flight-Toga

>Captcha: Singotl slain
>We killed an important martian named Singotl, yes?

"But... but you're a boy, you know?"
>boy
I'm a man and a half!

>>17568048
I'll second this. Heaven is full of togas and girls without pants.

>>17568048

Oh damn. YES! Go with this!

>>17567947
We can let her announce a warning first. And after we check on them, we can go get dressed and do the proper thing. But unless this is a chow-hall or something, we check on our crew before heading back to our room and finding whatever they're left for clothing for us by now.

>>17568048
It won't do anything for suggestions that we be insane.

BUT FUCK IT, WE'RE SCREWED ANYWAY.

>>17568048
Sure, why not

We already got the toga down. Fashion a wreath from two small branches of one of the potted plants and bust in, proclaiming "Veni, vidi, vici."

Considering that B.C. in the strike witches universe means Before Caesar and not Before Christ

I'm pretty sure togas are well respected.

Act like Caesar.

when questioned on why we wear a toga:
"Improvised, like my landing."

and remember, WE DID NOT CRASH, WE LANDED.

Anything you walk away from is a landing.

we dont have time to get dressed. if we stop to putz around were gonna be on the wrong side of some prison bars. we done burned this bridge. get our crew and head for the door. aybe say hell to some of the witches who arent cunts(that is, not minna) on the way out.

actually we're on an island and theres probably just that one plane...

erm maybe we were a bit premature burning that bridge. oh well. did what was called for.

... FUCK IT.

You just shot down ALL THE ALIUMS, which makes you a God, for this day, at least. And you just told a fucking Wing Commander - equivalent of a Major - to take a hike. At this point you're moving like a plane with a burning fuel tank - if you slow down, the loss of airflow to blow the flames back will let them bunch up on the tank and blow you to kingdom come.

Much like a shark, you must keep moving to live. You enter the room.

Conversation ceases.

You hear Minna come sprinting up behind you, gasping for breath. "You... you can't... you're... you're under arrest!"

"Nice. Where's my crew?" you say, casting about the room. You spy Sean sitting on a couch, a young Witch on either side of him and a cold beer in his hand.

With a shout of glee you bound across the room and tackle him happily. "You psychotic motherfucker I thought you were dead!" you holler. "I ordered a cake and a crate of party hats and everything, thanks for spoiling it, asshole!"

Sean laughs, enveloping you in a bear hug and hurling you onto the sofa with little apparent effort."Who do you think was manning the turret, you dumb fuck?"

You shake your head, trying to remember. "I had other things to think about," you point out. "When you stopped talking, I assumed you had to be dead, god knows nothing else could get you to shut the fuck up."

He laughs, and points to the swath of bandages along his jawline and neck. "Spiral-rocket nailed the starboard boom. Shrapnel took off my mask, mic, and fucked my intercom, too."

Point to her panties and ask if they have any in a 32.

>>17567991
Elegan/tG/entlemen are also glorious bastards, while /a/ would obsess over the girls.

I say, romans ruled half the known world wearing togas, it works for me

>Sean sitting on a couch, a young Witch on either side of him and a cold beer in his hand.

Alpha as fuck

>>17568136
>You hear Minna come sprinting up behind you, gasping for breath. "You... you can't... you're... you're under arrest!"

Bitch is all tsun and no dere.

>You spy Sean sitting on a couch, a young Witch on either side of him and a cold beer in his hand.
Damn he works quick.

>>17567390

>>2nd World War era
>>Alarm clocks that beep

Stopped reading right there. You are dumb as fuck. Take your weeaboo fucking loli pants fetish fanfic elsewhere, cunt snot.

It is inevitable what we must eventually do. We must find a way to acquire the Strike Witch armor, make it so guys can use it, then enhance it. We will become the rocket man!

>>17568171
>Bitch
fix'd

>>17568184

>>17568136
Alright, Sean's okay.
What about Ian?
Find Ian, confirm health, then demand to see the status of our plane and for transport back to our airbase to be put together.

>>17568184
Your picture seems to contradict your statement, I am honestly confused as to whether you're a shitty troll, or a troll.

>>17568220

Hate to say it, unless the plane accepts lolis as engines, the damn thing isn't going back up.

>>17568233
>accepts lolis as engines

...You, sir, are a genius.

well now that we know our boys are ok we should surrender quietly. best not to dig the hole too much deeper. and I dont think air force command is gonna take to kindly to some witches arresting some of THEIR heroes. let that big beuracratic shitfest be on our team for a change.

>>17568233
>unless the plane accepts lolis as engines
So we make it accept lolis as engines.

AHAHAHA, I'M BEING A DIPLOMAT

Luke is going to be so happy with us when we get home.

>>17568136
But where's Ian?

>>17568192
I heard if you eat a strike witches heart you gain its power.

And now we can apologize for any inconvenience or disruption caused and try not to dig ourselves into any deeper of a hole. Because really, I'm sure we'll get chewed out pretty hard for what we've already done, right?

Guys.
We are looking at a silver star at the very least, possibly the MOH

>>17568263
TEAR THE BASE APART FOR IAN.

AND SOME TROUSERS FOR GOD'S SAKE.

>>17568253
If we ever get beck alive, this will quickly turn into file clerk quest.

>>17568233
>accepts lolis as engines
I'm listening...

>Crew safe.
>Witches pissed.
>Fucks given: None.

Beer time. We saved some little girls and got out of it alive. Sure, she's the equivalent of a Major, but that's in sparkle land and she doesn't get to order you about after you likely saved most of a squad of kids. At least not until you've chilled out with your crew.

For those who are excited about the isle full of girls, they are barely of age, if that. Most of them seem pissed at you for some reason you can't seem to grasp, so fuck it, plenty of better women on the mainland, even if it IS England.

>>17568136

You sigh with sudden disappointment as you rise from the couch. "Still..."

"What?" Ian says from an easy-chair kitty-corner to the couch.

"I'm in a robe surround by girls in their underwear. I thought I was in heaven, but if YOU assholes are here..."

Sean unceremoniously trips you and sends you sprawling over the couch again, eliciting a chorus of laughs from the whole room - which, you now realize, is indeed full of young women in their underwear.

How awkward.

"YOSHIKA!" Minna yodels, her command presence slipping more and more by the minute. "Arrest him!"

You regard the 14-year old Yoshika with a jaundiced eye, and proffer your wrists with a dramatic flair, holding them at eye-height, palms inward, like a boxer. Yoshika approaches, looking apologetic, and tries to put the cuffs on you.

She stands on tiptoe, stretching as far as she can go, but she can just barely touch the sides of the cuffs to your forearm. The room explodes in laughter once more, and Yoshika shrinks, turning her face to the floor.

With what little dignity she has left, Wing Commander Minna spins on one heel and executes a proper military march out the door.

>Now what?

>>17568267
We're a pilot.

THIS is our attitude to everyone and everything that isn't us.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SdSj0_Fd4ds

>>17568268
And most likely posthumously if we keep this up.

- Find out where Ian is
- Get Minna to declare specifically what charge she's arresting us for
- Point out that we're still not under her command so any of her charges are going to be complete bullshit
- Get one of those beers of Sean
- Home again, home again, jiggity-jig
- Avoid Luke

>>17568225
>WWII
>loli witches
>complains about a clock

He's funning, bro. He's funning. It's cool.

>>17568285
So excellent.

See if our plane is in any condition to fly. If not, call into HQ and see about getting a new one.

>>17568285
Time to take our medicine I guess.

"I'm sorry, you we're saying something?"

>>17568267

WIth any luck they'll just shoot verbal abuse at us and then decide our timely action, crazy though it seems from the outside likely saved lives and precious war potential.

Better still, we did it without losing any crew. If we fuck up we have to take our lumps, but we didn't fuck up so they can eat some humble pie for a while as we bask in our own self importance.

>>17568285

Be nice, now that Ms. Commander Control Cunt is gone.

Pat the girl on the head. "You can arrest me later.

>>17568264
HEARTS FOR THE HEART GOD - er, I mean...

>>17568285
Okay okay, now my morals are kicking in. So far Yoshika doesn't seem that awful so let's not treat her like total crap.

>>17568288

But you see, even if we're the most badass mofo's on the planet right now we have to report to our pilot boss, and that's bad for us. As someone said earlier, nobody wants to see file clerk quest.

Also now we find some real clothing. Pants preferably.

>>17568285

>>17568285
Alright, apologize to Yoshika. She DID lead us to our crew, after all.
Then we find clothes and arrange for transport back to our airbase. There is a mountain of shit about to fall on us.

i came in here expecting waifuing and pantsu and got heroing and trolling.

everythingbetterthanexpected.jar

>what now
get clothes.

1. Apologise to Yoshika, she seems like an okay kid.
2. Track down that worthless waste of space Ian.
3. Trousers.
4. Report back to the Wing Commander and ask her why she's arresting us.
5. Get back to our unit.

>>17568358

Agreed

>>17568285

Pat Yoshika on the head. She's been cool so far, and now that Starch-panties is gone we've no more reason to fuck with her. No hard feelings.

>>17568358
Seconding this.

Treating poor yoshika like crap.

thats not very nice.

Minna is a huge bitch though, fuck that cunt, she's not fit for command.

>>17568379
IGNORE IAN, sorry missed that. We already found the bastard.

>>17568285
Let her arrest us, see if it makes her feel better.
Then we can chill with the bros in the room and recover. Maybe get some of the Witches to fetch some food.

I still move for a brofist for Yoshika.

>>17568358
This one.

1 pants
2 hooch
3 talk to the bitches... errr.... witches we saved up there
???
Profit

Well since our crew's alright, we don't have to do shit anymore. At this point it's just a matter of figuring out how to get back to base, but we're certainly not in any hurry. It's more of a "well I'd love to get out of your hair, so just fix my plane or give me a new one and I'll be on my way. In the meantime, where's the mess around here?" sort of vibe.

>>17568285
Pat Yoshika on the head to cheer her up and then proceed to find pants and a beer

[X] be nice to yoshika
[X] get clothes
[X] try to talk our way into getting a plane so we can leave
[X] failing that, get arrested and trust Luke to get us out of this hot mess. he seems fond of us.

>>17568421
Nah, I think we should be in a rush. Get out before people realize we're really not supposed to be here.
We've got a war to fight, after all.

>>17568264
I'd eat Yaeger's heart ifyouknowwhatimean

>>17568449
We've already won the sortie here. Now we just need to return to base. Our duty has been fulfilled.

>>17568388
Can we fuck that cunt? My body is ready.

>>17568457

Explain further.

>>17568449
What do you mean we're not supposed to be there? We were forced to land after encountering enemy forces during our patrol. Until the logistics are figured out I don't see how we could suppose to be somewhere else.

>>17568484

We were denied landing

Technically, we shouldn't be here.

Physically, we couldn't be anywhere else.

We need to continue our conquest of the strike witches, but only those older than sixteen, if you know what I mean.

But let's not forget the main focus of the quest.

>>17568481
Theres quite a bit in the way between you and yeagers heart.

>>17568502
Isn't getting with Minna and Yaeger the purpose of this quest?

I mean at least with Yaeger she's totally American.

>>17568502

No. Fuck that noise. We want off-base.

>>17568457

>>17568502

To be fair, at this point the Main focus of the quest seems to be professionally giving no fucks whatsoever.

>>17568523
I was under the impression that the point of this quest was to be the KING OF NO FUCKS GIVEN and show those pantsless glory-girls how real men lay down some air superiority.

>>17568540
Which generally makes it better than a waifuquest.

>>17568527
Are you gay or something?

>>17568492
You dont deny landing to a plane on fire. Thats like calling 911, getting the ambulance, then having doctors stare at you while you bleed to death for no reason.

With the BitchWitch Minna out of the room, and your crew alive and well, you settle down a bit. Yoshika is still looking mighty low, so you pat her on the shoulder forgivingly. "Sorry about that," you say. "That was Minna's mistake, not yours."

This seems to mollify her embarrassment. She whispers a barely audible thank-you.

"Come, now. Make room. I want to meet the hero of the hour." You turn to see an asian woman about your height approaching - she looks about your age, too. A striped eye-patch covers one eye, and she wears what looks like a Navy dress shirt - and a sword on one hip.

You offer a silent prayer that the sword is part of a dress uniform and take her offered hand, shaking it. "Sakamoto Mio, Imperial Japanese Navy," she says by way of introduction.

You introduce yourself in turn. "Army Air Corps, 442nd Night Fighter Squadron," you say.

Mio's eyes narrow, and her grip tightens on yours. "The 442nd, eh? Yes, your boys are very good at the surprise attacks."

"We are?" you say, sudden terror fueling your stellar bluff.

She looks at you suspiciously for long seconds, crushing your hand....

... and then throws her head back in a loud, powerful laugh, making you jump. "Never-mind me. Just a run-in we had with a 442nd pilot just the other night. You're nothing like him. He ran. You stood and fought."

"Hahahahahaha right, right," you say, your laugh dangerously brittle.

>Who do we talk to next?

>>17568558

Logically, you don't

She's gonna pull that every chance she gets to get our wings clipped. If she can, she'll make sure other things get clipped as well.

>>17568557

Did you never get laid or something?

we can bang some witch tail without it being waifu faggotry.

but it really isnt the time minna will genuinely ill us and make it look like an accident. we need to get off this island, or at the very least let someone know we're here.

>>17568567

She knows...

>>17568567

Fuuuuuck. She's onto us!

>>17568567
Contact base
We're stuck here for a while.

>>17568567
>"Never-mind me. Just a run-in we had with a 442nd pilot just the other night. You're nothing like him. He ran. You stood and fought."
BAIL OUT BAIL OUT
WE HAVE TO CHANGE THE SUBJECT

>>17568567
>sword is part of a dress uniform

Anyway, contacting our own command is probably a good idea.

>>17568567
Find a phone, call our airbase, get in touch with our squadron commander, arrange for a pickup of ourselves, our crew, and our plane.

>>17568557
>>17568580
It took a while, but here we fucking go.

>>17568567
Respond cheekily to the japanese. Ask about the witch who you saved.
Get hooch.

>>17568567

Out of the witches? The one we saved. Bitches love getting saved.

Out of anyone? nearest radio operator.

also, find some pants goddamn.

>>17568567
I need to contact my base, let them know that my crew, and I, are still alive. I also need to arrange a way to get back.

>Being a pilot
>Not hitting on the ENTIRE 501st,

At least figure out which ones might be impressed with your action. Obviously mio is asking for it too

>>17568567
Ask about the Witch we saved, if she was able to make it back to base safely.
Then call up Luke and have him get us out of here.

>>17568567
Let's get going, through unofficial channels if we can, official channels if we have to. We are in the Air Force, and seeing as how nobody is dead, we probably should get back ASAP.

>>17568567
As much as toga pushes across the no fucks mentality, we'll make more ground with real clothing. Talk to whoever is in charge of pants.

Priorities:

1. Inquire about that witch we saved.
2. Pants. We can even wear the toga over the pants. But seriously, pants.
3. Call our base if they haven't already been contacted.

Eventual Goal

>>17568567

SHE KNOWS

Do we know which of them is the la la la-er?

make sure the one we went down swinging for actually made it out. it would suck if that were for nothing.

then we need to get out of here. because minna is butt hurt and her butt can hold a whole hell of a lot of hurt.

SHE KNOWS

We're fucked.

>>17568653

Oh yes! Reprimand her for clouding the damn channels with her blathering idiocy!

>>17568567
We... should leave soon.

>that feel when Minna is your favorite witch

>>17568653
>>17568672

I think its Sanya, the night fighting Russian with radar?

Isn't that how her radar works though? The singing?

>>17568653
Its been a while since I watched SW but I'm guessing its either that Russian Dyke or the Finnish Dyke.

>Captcha: together unpantat

>>17568693
only other one i could think of is Lucchini, not a night fighter but immature enough to broadcast a location on a radio at night.

1 make sure our heroing actually heroed
2 pants
3 get the hell out of here before everyone back home gets some black envelopes.

When do we get to the part where Erica steals our Toga?

>>17568647
Priorities:

1. Inquire about that witch we saved.
2. Pants. We can even wear the toga over the pants. But seriously, pants.
3. Call our base if they haven't already been contacted.

THIS. We need to do these three things.

Also, get beer. Take Sean's if we have to.

>>17568602
>>17568603
>>17568609
>>17568652
She does. She also knows that when it mattered, we did the right thing. Not to say it won't have consequences, but the scales are still tipped in our favor.
...But not particularly pushing that part may be the better part of valor.
And find some pants, possibly after joking about them not having the 'standard issue' in your size. Then it's off to wrangle an explanation back to your base, figure out how much time to recover you guys will need, and if the mechanics have the slightest hope of fixing up your plane or if you're going to need a lift.
...Once we know our down-time, well, we let some of the decent ones help us enjoy the Big Damn Heroes downtime.

Keep in mind, we not only bounced, but shook a witch in a fatass of a fighter. If we keep that card close long enough, it might actually help cement our superace status. We just have to stay calm and not let on to it for now.

>>17568692
That feel when you favourite witch is a musty old cunt.

At least you don't like that French shitstain.

>>17568714

>her neck
what the fuck

Minna tried to shoot her best friend.

whatever we do, we should be breif.

>>17568744

I've never seen Strike Witches but is it possible to become Mach V or Titanium Man or whoever with them? What exactly do you need?

442nd you say? If my gut is right I think we're gonna win 21 medals of honor by the time we're done. Bitches love decorated soldiers.

>>17568736
Erica's dad was an alium.

>>17568756

No. Fuck that. We are going to stay in our plane and show them up every single time, because they are smalltime!

>>17568756
Well for one, you need a vagoo to use magic. Or be the shady bad guy and steal alien tech and fuse it with magic.

Over the course of the next round of introductions, the bigger picture of the morning's engagement is explained to you. The Witches, down by two (their Night Witch, exhausted from night patrol, and Minna, who's Striker wasn't flightworthy,) had been ambushed during morning exercises by a massive number of Martians, and the nearest two radar emplacements on the coast had been surgically destroyed at about the same time.

"If you hadn't surprised them, they probably would've drawn us apart and chopped us up," Mio concludes. "Starting with Trude."

"Who?"

"The one being chased, remember? You saved her."

"He did not," a chestnut-haired girl in the corner objects.

"Rank?" you whsiper to Mio.

"Wing Commander. JG-52."

You gulp. Christ, you really stuck your pecker in a hive of officers, here. "Yeah, I just, you know, helped."

"Lucky not to get killed," the girl says. "Why did you stick around after that first pass? You can't dogfight in a plane like that."

"But he totally did!" comes a high-pitched voice from the other side of the room - the Italian pilot, Luuchini. "He was like WHAP and ZOOM and BAMBAMBAM!"

You shrug again, suddenly getting nervous. Half-naked in front of women is one thing, but you're in the middle of Officer Country, and you're getting nervous. "Ah, Commander-"

"Just call me Sakamoto," the IJN commander says. "You need to talk to your people, right?"

"Yeah. They probably think I'm dead." You look out the window, at the setting sun. "Have I been out all day?"

She nods. "It's taken almost the whole day to work this shitstorm out. I'll show you to a phone."

>>17568756
you need innate magical ability to fly a striker unit which, and to fly it at a combat capable level you need to be young to have the energy to both keep it flying and still have the ability to project a magic shield.

so if you're a teenaged girl with magic powers you're in.

>>17568744
We're certified he-rows though. She pulls a gun on us all it does is make her look like a cunt.

>>17568771
But we can also show them up with their own power! Let's start some fucking Armor Wars in here.

>>17568774
UNACCEPTABLE...but we can keep that in mind for now.

>>17568787

But we somehow magicked out plane into breaking in the first thread!

And we're 21!

But anyway. Fuck striker units. Planes are cooler. Strikers are small time!

>>17568788

fat lot of good that does us from the grave.


also, OP is slowing down. busily rewriting because we're turning our nose up at waifuing?

well FUCK YOUR RAILS [spoiler]yer doin good though lad keep it up

>>17568813
this, if anything if we can learn our magic we can just apply it to our fighter instead of getting into a some prop boots

>>17568779
"Wing-Commander, I had more gnats on my tail after that pass than an Alabama summer night. The only thing to do was to turn and fight, the last thing that they would have been expecting from me."

>wanting to ditch awesome plane full of bros for the equivalent of prop powered rollerskates or wannabee iron man suit

yer a wizard harry

>>17568779

A few minutes later, you place a call to your home plate. A few phone shuffles later, and you hear the gruff voice of Frank Luke on the other end. "Luke."

"I really do have a concussion now," you say cheerfully.

A long moment of silence stretches across the line.

"SON OF A BITCH," the man on the other end roars. "You really are a lucky cocksucker, you know that?"

"That's what I've been told," you admit.

"Damn, son! Last I heard, the shore observers saw you in a defensive spiral with half the alien fleet chewing on your ass. Your crew?"

"Alive. And the plane's still in one piece." A charred, dented piece is still a piece, right?

"You put her down!?" Luke's voice is incredulous, but respectful. "Where are you? We'll send a driver."

You pause, trying to come up with the perfect, absolute perfect, phrasing to spring the truth on Luke. You owe him one for that asskicking last night.

>>17568832
It may be that it's midnight CST/1 AM EST/Who knows what time anywhere else...

OP may be getting fatigued.

>>17568853
>provide this

>>17568853

best make it a boat.

>>17568853
"I'm down in Sparkle City, there are no pants and the girls are witchy, oh won't you please take me home?"

>>17568853
Waist deep in a bunch of half naked girls, that's where.

"better make it a broomstick actually"

>>17568848
Not about to happen. Not if the previous posts and thread are any indication. This is the Pilot and Crew of the P-61 No Fucks Given.

>>17568853
"I'm in No-Pants Central, surrounded by young nubile girls. And I have no pants. Or shirt. Or much of anything, to be honest."

>>17568853
"it starts with Castle, and end with SURROUNDED BY MAGICAL TEENAGERS IN PANTIES. Guess."

>>17568832
>busily rewriting because we're turning our nose up at waifuing?
He seems to be following the style of writing set in the novels, the first manga and the Afrika manga series. It was more about battles rather than fanservice before the anime came out, that was Gonzo's fault, they knew they were going down the drain and they needed the sales from a massive multi-media project like Strike Witches to stay afloat. Obviously one of the main draws of the series was the girl, but it wasn't the whole thing.

>>17568880
This is obviously the best and most rational choice.

>>17568853

i seem to have been *ahem* 'caught'.

I give to you the fish of my people.

>>17568848

Bitch, you use both! Become the superace of all forms of aerial combat. Also, optional attachments with parts of your plane.

"I'm in a castle in England surrounded by girls with no pants, and I'm wearing a toga."

>>17568779
"Bad news. Wrecked that plane. Good news! We killed 5 bugs and I guess I saved all the witches while I was at it. So, what should I do?" No matter his response, hang up. We dont give a fuck, theres girls to impress.

>>17568886
>Waist deep in a bunch of half naked girls, that's where.

"Waist deep in a bunch of half naked girls and I have no pants. You?"

FTFY

how about a little goddamn subtlety here?

>>17568920

No. We actually like Luke.

>>17568853
"Castle something-or-other. Some island. Lots of girls. No pants to be found. Please send pants with the pick-up."

>>17568889
We're a pilot

>>17568869
"Well, unless you have a truck that can cross the channel, you'd best send a plane. I'm at Castle Barin."

"Yes. /That/ Castle Barin. After a bumpy landing, things seemed to have gone smoothly. I could use some pants though."

>>17568953
>
>>17568944

"Well, believe it or not we happened touched down at a nearby castle. I swear, your Brits and your castles... you've got them fucking everywhere in this damn country. This one was in the middle of the fucking channel."

>>17568944
Subtlety.
Look at this entire goddamn thread.
Have we ever done one thing subtle in this entire quest?
I see no reason to start now.

>>17568911
Thanks for the fish.

>>17568886
>>17568880
>>17568873

"Best make it a boat, sir."

You can feel the coldness of Luke's sudden horror right through the phone line.

"You... didn't... land on-"

"OOOOH~ I'm down in SPAR-KLE-CITY, there are no pants and the GIRLS ARE WITCH-Y, oh won't you please take me home?"

Frank Luke, famous balloon buster and fighter ace, chokes in absolute horror.

"Yes, sir, I'm up to my ass in, well, ass," you say casually. "Oh, by the way, how many kills did I get?"

"I - uh - oh fuck," Luke says.

"Sir? Kills?"

"Eight confirmed, a few probables, some damaged, don't know which ones are yours and which are your gunners until we talk to the other-" a pause - "pilots."

"I think I can take care of that before I leave," you say.

"Yes..." Luke says, and you get that itchy feeling on the back of your neck again. "You will. Because you're not coming home till tomorrow afternoon at the latest."

WAT

I'm at castle barin, but dont worry they've only /tried/ to arrest me so far.

>>17568880
This is acceptable.

"Please explain. It was no joke that I want off this rock."

>>17568944
>how about a little goddamn subtlety here?
>subtlety
>here

In case you haven't been following along, we are wearing nothing but a toga, telling, no, demanding, a bunch of pants-less teenagers, that outrank us, to show us to our crew, and after that, a phone. What part of "no fucks given" do you not you understand?

>>17568974
So yeah, is there a pharmacy on the island ?

>>17568974
>up to my ass in, well, ass

>>17568974
>"You will. Because you're not coming home till tomorrow afternoon at the latest."
IT BEGINS.

>>17569003

Better yet, are there any pants?

>>17568903
>implying we arent glorious and bastardly enough to get our waifus AND rip and tear the aliens.

>>17568974
Nothing can possibly go wrong here

>>17568974
>Because you're not coming home till tomorrow afternoon at the latest."
I like where this is going

>>17569005
I'm surprised he could find a sheet big enough to cover his balls.

>>17568974
"Tomorrow... afternoon? Well. I hope they have some pants around here. And that the bitchy one that tried to shoot me down while I was landing, doesn't try to arrest me again."

"No really sir, when am I coming home?"

>>17568974
"Sir, could you repeat that last part? Because I thought I heard that we're not getting off this rock until tomorrow afternoon.
"I wasn't kidding when I want out. What am I supposed to do, surrounded by half-clothed girls that aren't even legal yet?"

>>17569029
Rape whistles aren't in their kit, have fun.

The commander here sorta ordered me arrested. time may be critical here.

>>17568974
Turn to the little wimminz,
"It appears I'm going to need a place to sleep tonight."

Can we please just get some fucking pants already.

>>17569056
A thousand times this.

Possibly changed to "Myself and my crew need..."

>>17568974
Welp, time to take in the sights...

>>17568974

"Sir, uh, what?"

"We have no transports and no pilots to spare for a ferry flight, all the ferries to the island have shut down by now, the Witches are too drained to physically haul your fat ass over to the mainland, even if they wanted to, so unless you want to swim, chap... well, yeah."

"Oh. Okay," you say, nonplussed.

Luke pauses again, and when he speaks, the tone in his voice lets you know you've stepped into a noose. "Actually, you might have to stay longer. You said your plane is still in one piece?"

"... yeees?" you say cautiously, wondering how the Major is going to take that accomplishment and fuck you with it.

You aren't left in suspense for too long. "That's MY plane, pilot. I need it back here, and that means a ferry flight. And oh look, I've already got a pilot right there."

Oh shit oh fuck oh doom on you. "Sir, I've got patrols to fly-"

"NOT ANYMORE~!" Luke shouts, and hangs up the phone as he cackles like a madman.

It would seem Luke is up to something, and you're now his little bitch.

Trapping you on an island with the Witches you pissed off last night probably didn't disappoint him, either.

"Everything worked out?" Sakamoto asks you, poking her head in from the next room.

"Yes sir," you say, tacking on the honorific reflexively. "I can't get out till-"

"-tomorrow at least, I know," she finishes. "We've got a room ready for you, and your crew, of course."

"One more thing," you ask. "My clothes...?"

"Oh, we put them in the wash. They're on the line right now. Should be dry by tomorrow," she says casually, and walks out of the room.

>WAT FUCKING DO

>>17569062
NO!
I DON'T WANT PANTS, I'M ALPHA MCRAPESAUCE, DESTROYER OF ALIENS, AMAZING FLYER AND MASTER OF LOLI'S FUCK PANTS!

>>17569066
>"My crew and I"

Damnit.

We aren't ever going to get to wear pants again at this rate.

>>17569070
Lets meet the other girls

pilot and gunner and RO share credit for kills.

>>17569070
gather crew, get to fixing plane, add more dakka to it

alternatively, shenanigans

>>17569070
Welp, we are the Toga Master, the Best Ace and the Master of No Fucks Given.

Relax, have a beer and sit back. We can figure out where to go from there.

yeah lets go get some hero credit for being badass and shit. maybe tap some witch tail.

"waifu faggotry!"

to which i can only respond
>pilot
>passing up sex

>>17569069
>Arisaka
>bolt-action

>>17569098

This. Inform crew. Start repairs.

>>17569070
>dried by tomorrow
NOT SOON ENOUGH. NOT SOON ENOUGH

One slip up and we're going to find ourselves staring down the barrel of Minna's pistol.

There is only one thing we can do.

Go find the Officer's Mess and get so drunk we can no longer care about anything.

>>17569070
Pants. We get a fucking pair of pants.
We are not going to prance around like these little girls in their underwear.

>>17569090
This. And maybe apologize to Minna a little for making her look bad in front of her subordinate. After all, trying to arrest us is more of a joke than a threat, so no real harm done.

Shirts, however, are entirely out of the question, naturally.

talk to the witches. but not the bitches.

>>17569122
Fuck no.

>>17569097

Planes get kills.

If I'm not mistaken, you all are aces

Only came up one other time IRL... B-52 got extremely lucky (Unlucky).

>>17569118

Exactly. We may give no fucks but we at least need a little dignity to add to our ace status.

First of all, we need a fucking drink.

>>17569111
I'll admit the only WWII rifle I own is a nugget, but is something wrong with that depiction?

1)get pants
2)recive adulation

Apologize to Minna. Grab a drink with your crew.

>>17569139
Most Strike Witches use automatics for reasons which should be pretty obvious, the only exception uses a fuckhuge cannon.

>>17569070
...well then. Given the crowd and what they heard, it's obviously time to not back down from our toga.
When we have a moment, try and find out what the mechanics did with our plane.
And maybe a bit of time for some nonchalance at the mess after making sure our crew know what we're in for.

>>17569157
see
>>17569128

>>17569157

No.

>>17569160
right I just thought he was
>implying
something else

>>17569139

Absolutely nothing wrong.

But who dogfights with a goddamn bolt-action?

Wait, I just noticed the anti-aircraft sights are still on that Arisaka. Oh, I get it. Hurr Hurr, Mr. Artist.

>>17569157

fuck no

>>17569070
Darker than Black fuck yeah.

Tummy grumbles, ask for food and SOME FUCKING LIQUOR GODDAMN

>>17569161
It may not be the crew; after all, you only need one guy to fly the plane.

Anyway, we need to defuse the situation with arresting pant-less one, find out what state the plane is in (we probably busted the radar at the end there) and then kick back and try to relax until the morning.

>>17569157
Fuck apologising to Minna. We had a duty to our men and all she had to do was get the fuck out of the way but she couldn't do that because of her ego. So, no, she gets exactly zero apologies and zero fucks given.

>>17569157

>>17569157

Talk to all witches who were invovled in that dogfight, get an accurate kill tally while gauging their feelings towards the crews efforts, if minna's the CO, might as well get some of the other brass on our side.

especially if staying for a while.

Trapped on in a base, surrounded by teenage girls in their panties, who can break you like a twig if you get on their bad side (Which we've already done).

Check the plane, get drunk, and sleep.

Our priority is to get off this fucking rock as quickly as possible. That first means getting the plane in shape, so let's find the hanger.

>>17569160
That's not just any Arisaka, that's a Type-99.
It was quite powerful and fitted with AA sights, the idea was that if you outfitted anyone who could carry one and massed them together you would be able to let loose rather large volleys of cheap AA fire that was fairly effective on low flying planes.

>>17569216
Again, I think some apologies are in order. I'd rather not have Minna pissed at us.

>>17569216
Add to this finding out whoever helped patch up our crew.

>>17569216
Seconding this.

>>17569193
Think more into it. She is an icy cunt to us yes. But if we apologize (again no fucks, doesnt matter either way) and shes still a cunt, we make her look bad. Or she accepts and stops being a bitch. Its win/win.

>>17569254

no sleazy headgames. we we right, we dont apologize. have a little pride.

Even though it's Minna's fault, apologize anyway. Bitch is trying to arrest us for God's sake.

>>17569248
I'd talk to yoshika about that.

>>17569265
She is a Wing Commander and we did go up against her authority. Apologise for that, sooth the pride and we don't find ourselves waking up chained to a radiator while she burns our trousers in front of us.

>>17569246
>>17569254
fuck no. we're in the right. let's just try to avoid her and everyone else we can

>>17569254
I can't imagine what apology we'd offer her beyond, "I'm sorry you're a massive bitch who can't do her job properly" and I don't see that helping the situation any.

the planes been shot to hell and at least one of the engines had a sever fire. then its landing gear wet out and it banged into some concrete. its gonna take a while to fix, and we cant really do anything to hurry the repair crews along, that not being our speciality.

best we go make friends. you know, in case we start getting thrown in prison again.

>>17569289
she burns our trousers we rape her until shes in a sobbing mess.

they are loli's after all, they don't think rationally most of the time.

>>17569300
Tell her you forgive her for her being a bitch and that she has a nice ass.

>>17569300
Or maybe try: "I'm sorry I disobeyed your orders but I had to save the lives of my crew"?

>>17569311
Minna is like 21 or something.

Why the fuck would we want to get friendly with these fucking freaks? They're mutant fucking children playing at war. If anything, our first instinct should be MAIM, KILL, BURN! Since we're outnumbered here, our second best option is to just keep to ourselves until we can get back home.

WELP.

With that all settled, it's time to do what you can. Being a 20-year old fighter pilot, full of rage and testosterone, your priorities are thus:

1. Booze.
2. Food.
3. Fornication.
4. Sleep.

But above all is:

0. Don't tarnish your reputation.

There's very few ways a man who potentially made Ace In A Day could ruin the legend of such a feat. Being murdered to death by pissed-off little girls with magical powers because you were dogpiled by jailbait is definitely one of them.

So. PANTS.

Trekking deeper into the castle, following instructions from Luuchini, you eventually locate the laundry, and from the closest outside door, the laundry line. Cackling with glee, you find your pants and put them on. To hell with the damp - it's better then inglorious death.

Out of the corner of your eye you spot red hair and long legs vanishing around the corner of the castle. Hmm. Interesting.

>Follow?
>Yeahnahyou'reacunt.jpg

>>17569326

She's just got her panties in a bunch... We needed to land and she couldn't stop that... We challenged her perfect control over the installation.

>>17569289
And for screaming obscenities at her that would make her grandmother faint/roll in her grave. We usually arent like that, but being BLINDED BY PURE RAGE can make people say some pretty nasty things.

>>17569254
>>17569246
>>17569326
holy fucking shit you guys are beta as fuck.

THEY ARE 14 OR SO, THEY ARE NOT GONNA THINK RATIONALLY! YOU ARE DEALING WITH LITTLE KIDS, WHY IN THE FUCK ARE THE ADULTS APOLOGIZING TO THE LITTLE KIDS?

>>17569340
Follow her.

>>17569340
FOLLOW

>>17569340
Oh no you don't, OP. The foulmouthed koala it is.

>>17569340

other direction.

>>17569340

Find pants and go skirt chasing?

We aren't that stupid... Food and booze, the tail will come as it wants.

>>17569340
>Follow
>Rape
>Apologize
In that order

>>17569326
She's not in our chain of command. It's like expecting an apology from your neighbour because they refused your order to not save their kid from a burning building. They had no right to give that order, they had no reason to obey that order and you fucked up completely by not only trying to impede them in the execution of their duty but by also trying to punish them after the fact to salve your wounded pride.

No apologies.

>>17569340
Fuck following her, it is piss drunk time!

>>17569340
Follow

>>17569340
Follow. I'm curious about who would be spying on me during my brief visit to birthday-suitville.

>Yeahnahyou'reacunt.jpg

>>17569360
>>17569361
fuck no. we should stay far as fucking possible away from these bitches. the ones that aren't trying to shoot or arrest us aren't worth pursuing.

>>17569360
>>17569361

thats minna you dildos

yahnahyou'reacunt.jpg

>>17569340
Yeah, no.
Go and find the mess hall and grab something to eat. Or the Officer's Club and get some booze. Whichever we find first.

>>17569340
run far, far away. and get your crew; there's always safety in numbers

>>17569399
Not very safe for the girls.

>>17569311
>>17569372
sometimes I wonder about you, /tg/, sometimes...

the only one with red hair is ice cunt you morons!

there is no good ending here

>>17569388
>not raping and murdering afterwards
you rape and kill the commander and then they are scared shitless of you. most of them are loli's so they see their boss brutally murdered for challenging you then you have made the point and they won't fuck with you ever.

this is war and you guys are being pansy fucks, think like soldiers god damn.

>>17569340
Yeahnahyou'reacunt.jpg

Follow. That pervert was watching us change

You guys are pussies, follow her, if we end up dead, her career is fucked no matter what she does.

>>17569424

Why are we being pussies for having no interest in her? No fucks, remember?

>>17569412
...Dude. I hate to be the voice of reason here, but Minna would kill the fuck out of us on a land fight.

>>17569388
Everyone knows that. And it will be hilarious when we call her a pervert.

>>17569359
Its a military thing. You FUCKING DONT disrespect officers/superior ones if you value anything. She outranks most of our direct command. Its like a manager calling a vice ceo and screaming shit because we got fired. They can, and will, end you.

>>17569412
You know, we were called "oversexed, overpaid, and over here" but I don't think rape and murder were what the limeys were implying. Wartime doesn't mean time to rape our allies, and you should feel bad for saying it.

Right now, I think we need to go break the news to Ian and Sean and then either get some booze/sleep or check on the plane.

>>17569438
It might be someone else, all we caught was a glimpse of red hair.

>>17569340
>how this is gonna end

Follow, fuck it.

Minna McIcycunt - 18
Mio Eyepatchface - 20
Trude Nazicunt - 18
Erica Stolehitlershat - 16
Shirley Yeagertits - 16
Elia Finnishlesbian - 15
Perrine Frenchcuntnobodylikes - 15
Lynette Crazybritishcunt - 15
Miyafujesus Marysu - 15
Sanya Russiandyke - 14
Frankfurter Zuchini - 13

Knowing is half the battle.

>>17569438
yes but no fucks allow us to not do shit like "lol apologize to her, we are sorry for being alpha..."
no we do shit and fuck the consequences, that how we have been so far.

>>17569449
No other red heads other than Shirley.

shes a bitch.

like everyone else thinks we're a goddamn hero.

we shoulg go have, you know, fun. not slam our head into a brick wall pointlessly

Disregard bitches, inform crew. And then some food. And then some drinks. Unless we can somehow turn the drinks into food therefore killing two birds with one simultaneous stone.

Follow, and ask her why she has her panties in a bunch. No rape or apologies, at least not right away. Rance it up eventually, but this bitch wants you in a court martial, not marshal, not arrested. Don't try to fool yourselves that she isn't in chain of command and such, she's a MAJOR.

>>17569465
I'mokaywiththat.jpg

More accurately: I'dhitthatlikethefistofgod.jpg

>>17569443
of the enemy.

gbod damn /tg/ this is why you guys act so damn stupid sometimes.

>>17569444
>in america
>implying evil japanese witch lolis are on our team during WWII