>>17054066
Sadly most stories involving young people will fall into 2 categories:

Kid gets fucked over
OR
Kid is a fuck

>At the FLGS for pre-release
>Smoking outside
>Guy walks out with his 5 year old after letting him buy a pack.
>The kid is super excited about his pack while the guy discusses the on-going tourny.
>I hail the kid "What's up, buddy?"
>Kid is beaming as he holds a card against his chest.
>"I got Chandra Planeswalker!"
>I D'aww like a motherfucker.

Kid had awesome luck.

>> I take my nephew to his very first Magic the Gathering Prerelease also his very first Tournament ever.
>> He gets the shit beaten out of him. He is very sad but keeps his shit together
>> after the tournament I tell him to play against me.
>> I let him win and he is so overjoyous happy and tells everyone in the store how he beat me.

I am proud of him.

>dad and his kid in the dark eldar section
>kid is pulling down random boxes and piling them up
>dad is like "I think we need to get the army rulebook first, son..
>kid rolls his eyes
>"dad, we'll just put them together like they are on the boxes, jeez"

Poor father.

>>17054066
My God, I laughed my ass off at this.
Thank you, well needed.

>>17054179
Aww
That reminds me of a guy who played with an unsleeved primeval titan back when it was a bajillion dollars worth
I didn't have the heart to tell 'im that it was probably worth more than his yearly allowance.

A friend of mine worked in a local game store tutoring kids how to play warhams.

He's not very kid friendly.

>>17054284
>warhams
>hams warring with each other

FUND IT

>go to local FLGS
>bunch of kids playing their very first game
>tau fire warriors assaulting orc slugga boys

>>17054308

>>17054308

dude - spicy sausage guns are so OP

and they totally nerfed the vegetarian codex - now its all algae troops and flower power

>play Draigo grey knights.
>challenged by kid.
>don't like to backseat drive, so don't tell him what to do and not do.
>old neckbeard tells him to pile all his shit infantry onto Draigo and his unit, so it dies.
>no one tells the kid not to listen to this stupid idea.
>kid carries it out. Loses all the nobz and boyz in the process.
>feel a bit bad.
>play in such a way that Draigo ends up seeking out and killing warboss in honorable combat, then gets krumped by heavily converted deffdread in a last stand, like motherfucking spartans.
>it's a draw.
>kid says it was the most epic game he's ever played, and wants to challenge me every sunday.
>tells neckbeard he needs to play more, since his game knowledge is terrible.
>mfw

>>17054308
Not that guy, but I've also always called it warhams.
Just easier, and infinitely more appropriate.
Because when the fuck do you ever see a hammer in warhams?

>>17054359
You have planted the seeds of a bro gamer. Tend what you have sown and you will have a non-munchkin who plays for fun rather than surs bus.

>>17054376
Play Grey Knights, see them all the time.

>>17054376
Why are you playing with legs of ham?

>seven year old girl wanders over to my friend and I playing yu-gi-oh on a bench
>asks to see our cards
>hand her my deck
>"wooooooooow, cooooooooool!"
>she flicks through them admiringly for a few minutes then looks up and realizes we were in the middle of a game
>"I'm sorry I stopped your game misters..."
>give her a kuriboh, rewarded with a smile

everything went better than expected.jpg

>Sweden, apocalypse release day.
>play heavily stacked imperium versus xeno game.
>have 20 kids on my side, against neckbeard british fag.
>his army has all the leman tanks, dreads, land raiders in Stockholm.
>4 baneblades.
>versus my kids with a unit of guardians, foot firewarriors, shitty geared crisis suits, seers, and warwalkers each.
>devise plan. Tie up infantry and tanks outside no-man's-land, forcing a draw at worst.
>kid's foot seers embody Disturbed's Indestructible, eating all the dreads on a flank.
>other kid swarms baneblades with spearlocks attached to guardians.
>inspiring speeches, and kids accusing beckbeard of being unfun.
>we fight to a draw, inches away from his objective.
>neckbeard rages, because the game is fluff violation.
>kids tell him to fuck off in broken english.
>mfw Ihavenoface when they tell me I need to tell him what they're telling me in swedish.
>mfw I repeat their anger to him in proper english.
>he apologizes for being an asshole.

There's always this story about kids and magic.
http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/12542099/

>>17054376
Well...

>40k tournament at LGS
>neckbeards, neckbeards everywhere
>never seen so many space wolf armies in my life
>there's this 8-year old kid there with Jump BA
>pulls minor wins on neckbeards all day
>then round 4, has to play the platoon IG guy
>BA drown in waves of guardsmen

figures.

>>17054179
no he didn't chandra it's pure shit.

>>17054414

awesome

>>17054449

> Build custom Battle Wagon
> Proud of it
> Two kids walk by my boxes
> One says "dude look at that"
> Another says, "What kit is that?"
> Really proud of it

>Apoc battle, two big mixed teams
>little kid's ork squads in front of my baneblades and russes
>constantly tease him about blowing his dudes up with the enemy
>"Noooooooooooooooo don't shoot my orks~"

So cute.

>Onslaught block era
>move to new city, discover LGS
>LGS tournament
>play some kid
>"lol mtg is srs business, I won't go easy on some kid"
>I get utterly fucking raped
>later see kid kicked ass on a national level

>Be 18 on gap year from school. Got a lot of time on my hands, getting into Blood Bowl tourney at GW. Fancy a regular 40k game.
>Walk into GW
>There's an older guy, about 17 or 18 surrounded by all the kids and his girlfriend
>Dressed in a trench coat, clearly peaked with his good looks, expensive looking circular John Lennon style glasses on.
>I've just walked in looking pretty out of place. Basketball shorts and shoes, wearing a cap because my mullet is off the charts at this point, NE Patriots tshirt on...
>I start talking to the staff about stuff, and I mention I've brought my Craftworld Eldar
>He says, 'Oh cool, well lets see if I can get you a game, Hey John, this guy plays Eldar, you should give him a game, that cool?'
>'Huh? Yeah sure, sweet'
>Assumes easy victory with his Chaos forces
>Long boring battle story later, I've thrashed him
>As the battle continue more and more kids had gone from his side of the table to mine, untill they were all supporting me, and asking me questions.
>A few of them even pick up my signature unit from the shop; Eldar Rangers
>Eventually his Girlfriend gets bored and says she's going to look at other shops
>This completely destroys his concentration, and he loses that very turn, perhaps even deliberately
>The kids lord me for beating an unbeatable chaos army with weak eldar. I tell them it was all tactics.
>I am become Creed, Destroyer of Chaos

This was a good few years ago when I used to play 40k

>Playing as a VERY shooty Iron Warrior force
>Heavy bolters on everything that could have them
>Basilisk for shelling the shit out of things
>Younger kid comes into the store he's a bit loud but nothing special
>Comes up and asks me for a battle
>Pulls out a World Eater force
>"Oh cool this should be really interesting"
>By halfway into the battle he's lined up his troops and is actively trying to have a shoot out with me using mostly bolt pistols while my units are in cover

I didn't even know what to do, it caught me so off guard I started to laugh as I rolled away to destroy most of his force in the space of 2 turns. I don't think he even attempted to assault me once.

>He thanks me for a good match then leaves the store

>>17054528

That...is really weird.

>Take my 18 month old son to our group DND game
>DM decides we need a break and teaches us how to larp fight with foam rapiers
>We put them down and are about to start again what my son gets both swords
>Hands me one and starts swinging
>My face when

>>17054522
>trench coat
>circular John Lennon style glasses
>good looks

>be a kid
>have a chess match with an 18 more or less guy
>some how loose all my troops and my king ends up cowering in a corner, surrounded by all his units.
>he only lost peons
>still remember it as one of the must fun games of chess i've ever had.

i sucked badly but man that was my poor kid's tactical game.

> Discover LCS holds Friday games
> Attend
> About a month latter the guy who organizes it brings his kids
> This is a regular practice during the summer
> They're a 9 year old boy and a 10 year old girl
> They're both fairly good at games
> The boy is actually scary good for being 9
> mfw they show up to the halloween party that year in costume
> mfw the Father is Jango Fett, his son is Bobo Fett, and their daughter is Aurra Sing

>run school chess club
>nerdy little shit of a kid smokes the other kids all the time
>constantly challenges me for a match
>I don't play chess
>asks me what I do play
>"yu-gi-oh"
>he challenges me at that
>his deck is full of rare shit and all those foil cards you only get with pre-bought decks
>he actually does the exaggerated draw motions from the anime
>spend rest of the game laughing and losing in that order
>he's smug as fuck til I activate my trap card:

"This wasn't my deck, I borrowed it. I prefer Magic."

He was so mad, it was adorable in a sad sort of way. The kid then bought a Magic deck next week and kept trying to challenge me even after I beat him several times. I dunno how some people can be so competitive.

>>17054593
He wanted to fuck

I saw a dude run a game for a table of six-year-olds.

It was a fantasy game about fetching the ingredients to prepare the most awesome cake for the king's birthday.
It was so awesome I'm pretty sure reality imploded a bit that day.

>Playing Deathwatch.
>One guy brings his 8 year old son to the game.
>Kid wants to play, how can we say no?
>Roll up a character for him, Storm Wardens Assault Marine.

>A few minutes later, we're all trying to infiltrate an abandoned Imperial installation that has been overrun by Tau.

>Stealth suits, Stealth suits everywhere. I get hit from behind and lose half of my health because PLASMA WEAPINZ R KEWL. Other players beat back the assault, Stealth suits disappear.

>Kid says he wants to rocket jump straight down the hallway.

>Why the fuck not?

>Rolls "01", critical success.

>Rocket jumps down the hallway, chainsword roaring, decapitating and amputating the previously cloaked enemy force in droves.

>Our faces when.

>>17054522
Kudos dude. I fucking love my rangers. The only problem is now at my group everyone knows those rangers are best left alone from shooting, and throw ANY cc at them then they die. still a pretty good distraction from other units though...

>>17054576
>the Father is Jango Fett, his son is Bobo Fett, and their daughter is Aurra Sing
and their daughter
>their

>>17054688
>2011
>pointing out correct grammar usage in greentext
I seriously etc.

>Magic tournament
>little fat girl who's the daughter of the store owner
>Her deck is practically an auto-win button that her dad made, and even he just netdecked it
>Every time she beats someone, she says "How does it feel to be beaten by an 8-year old girl?"
>End up facing against her in the semi-finals
>She starts off with "Go easy on me, I'm just a little girl."
>Smile, "Just as long as you go easy on me, you've been doing pretty well tonight."
>Start game amiably.
>She starts cheating
>Bold-faced, no-shame cheating
>Untapping lands by sliding her palm, drawing 2 cards rather than one, not discarding with 8+ cards in hand, the works.
>I pretend that she's just making mistakes, and tell her what she's done wrong
>"Whoops, I'm sorry, I don't know the rules all that well."
>Continues cheating, so much that I can barely keep track
>Try to call her mistakes when I can see them
>Her dad walks over
>"Is there a problem?"
>"Oh no, I'm just helping her learn the game. She's having trouble with some rules."
>"That's good."
>She continues to cheat
>Beats me in game one
>"How does it feel to be beaten by an 8-year old girl?"
>I glance over at the store owner, who's smiling

>Sideboard time.

>>17054711

>No mercy, none.
>We start the game, she draws one card too many
>Call her out on it, and tell her that if she keeps making those kind of mistakes, the best way she's going to learn is to have a judge watch her
>"Whatever."
>Turn 3, she untaps one of her lands while I draw my card and then plays an instant later in that turn.
>Call for a judge
>Her father walks over
>"Is there a problem?"
>"Would it be alright if you watched over this girl and corrected her when she makes a mistake? It's hard to keep track of her and play at the same time."
>"C'mon man, she's just a little girl."
>Point out how she thinks that she can untap lands at any time
>Her dad stays to watch over her
>She continues to cheat
>Her dad starts to correct her
>I start to beat her face in with my deck
>She thinks she can get away with the "draw two cards rather than one" trick
>Her dad pretends not to notice
>Tell her to pause, right before she puts those cards along with the rest of her hand
>She quickly merges the two cards with the rest
>"What's the problem?" Her dad asks
>"Your daughter had six cards last turn. I'd like a hand count."
>She has eight cards in hand
>"How did that happen? Oh well," Her dads says as he makes her put one of those cards on the top of her deck
>I ask for another judge, because he obviously can't do the job
>Her dad starts to argue, even threatens to kick me out of the store
>Another judge walks over

>>17054723
>I explain that I want him to watch over the girl to keep her from making mistakes.
>"Dude, she's like eight."
>Other people walk over to see what all the commotion is about
>I recite the entire match, noting hand size and land count each step, highlighting all the discrepancies, even after her father started to watch over her
>"If you were watching her hand, you would have seen those errors, and you chose not to correct them. Even if she's eight, you're not."
>The judges tell me to just play the game
>Other people who played against her start calling her a cheater, and pointing out how any of the things she did would be a match loss
>Little girl starts to cry
>"Look! You've gone and made my daughter cry! That's it, you're banned from this store!"
>Stand very still.
>Think about all the sad things in the world
>My dead cat, the stuffed animal I used to carry around all the time but lost one day, my dead grandparents, everything
>Tears pour out of my eyes

>"Sir, fake tears are easy. What isn't easy is destroying the last bit of honor that you might have still clung too. You really had to go out of your way to do so."

>Pick up my deck, leave the store
>Saddle up my horse, and ride off into the sunset

>Kid brother, who is like 7 or 8, collects pokemon cards
>doesn't even play the damn game
>collects only because hurr durr all my friends do it
>my mother is stupid enough to keep wasting her money when the dumb kid trades all the cards away anyways

>>17054727
>My dead cat, the stuffed animal I used to carry around all the time but lost one day, my dead grandparents, everything

Now you made me tear up, you asshole.

>>17054745
It's ok buddy... I shot his horse.

>>17054745
Reading after the second comma, as an addition to the subject prior, makes it less sad and more weird.

>visit GW
>kid, about 7 or 8, is on the in-store computer, looking at IG forgeworld tanks
>nonchalantly ask him about what he's looking for
>says he's considering getting a crassus transport and a baneblade after he finishes off his leman russes and catachans
>be surprised by his moxy
>"Oh, I don't even know if I can build the stuff I have, but mom's new boyfriend is stupid and has lots of money so I might as well!"

>>17054745
>all that shit

Good thing I'm dead inside.

>>17054765
That kid is my hero

>>17054765
I wish my mom had stuck with some of the stupid and rich boyfriends.

REVERSE OF THREAD

>every year i travel to a city in the world for a week with my dad, since blablabla never really had a father blabla alcohol. Anyway.
>We're in copenhagen, denmark. Having a good time.
>See a games workshop, interested in 40k thanks to /tg/ lurking for a year.
>we enter, my dad goes into full nostalgia mode when he sees people painting the minis because it reminded him of his model trains
>3 hours later still in games workshop.

Also, same store, same day.
>4 brittish kids vs 3 danish kids having a warhammer fantasy battle while the GW redshirt is translating and story telling inbetween.

And that's when i bought my first ork.

>that feel when your mom never had any boyfriends.
>that feel when you grew up without a fatherfigure.

>at FLGS for 40K 1500p mini-tournament
>play my Traitor Guard IG
>blitzkrieg my way through first two matches
>thirds match is against a 10 year old kid also playing IG
>before the match we shake hands and he tells me not to go easy on him just because he's a kid.
>"sure thing"
>swing hard the first two turns killing off a russ and chipping down a infantry blob screening his CCS and Creed
>his third turn, time for reinforcements.
>he rolls in his devildog squadron...
>...right behind my of russes
>CREEEED!!!!!
>after a hard battle he wins, mostly due to him blowing the shit out of my russes and denying me vital firepower
>shake hands and offer my russian officers cap to him as prize
>the kid's smile almost cuts his ears of

>>17054831

>that feel when you killed the thread by pointing out the most common thing catgirls and fatguys share.

>Kid comes to our store
>Tau players eyeing him like a pack of vultures
>Kid wants to learn to play, for them another easy win and bragging rights
>Reel the kid into what will shape up to be the biggest anal devastation match of the century
>Literally, like 5 armies against his small force, yet they're leading him along like he's got a chance, falsely telling him it'll be a "free for all" (they always team up no matter what)
>Essentially they're just bullying the poor kid, he's clearly intimidated
>Figure somebody's got to do something, or we'll lose a prospective player here
>Lone IG player steps up to the plate
>"Hey there sweetie, need someone to play with?"
>"Uh, well I've got my own models, but I'm not really sure how to play."
>"Well don't worry, you can be on my team!"
>Scooches over next to the kid, sitting with him on one of the couches at the table
>Asks someone to bring over one of her army cases while busy teaching the kid how to play
>During setup, LAYS OUT THE FUCKING FURY, alongside the kid's small Ork team
>Pair of them proceed to trash the 6-man Tau team

I loved it because it was so typical that they wouldn't teach the kid how to play, yet still toss him into a game headfirst against all of them. Hadn't seen them so mad after that game since a long time. And the kid was beaming afterward.

Had a big game going on at Uni, one of the guys who no longer plays with us for reasons unknown(I assume job moved him or whatever) brought his kids.
The kids love my conversions. Because a Thomas the Train toy is cheaper than a battlewagon. They ask to play with the models I am not using, sure, why not.
Later...
>boy crying
>girl crying
>go see my killa kan broken and mangled.
>Boy accidently fell on it
No big deal, this means I get to fix it so it looks better.
Kids happy, dad happy, I'm not quite so happy but it doesn't really matter.

>>17054522
>trench coat
>circular John Lennon style glasses
>surrounded by kids

NO POLICE WERE CALLED WTF

>having a nice 40k game in the GW store
>my mahreens crushin some eldarfags
>door opens and my mates all go like "hey turn around bro, gotta see this"
>a hot ass milf walks in, together with a like 11 yr old boy
>he is interested in 40k, watching our game with huge eyes while the Greg (the store owner) prepares a little game to play with him
>his mom is looking at the models and us, not realy sure what to make of it
>I gave Greg a look and point to the back of the store
>he understand and nods, pulling the boy to the gaming table, explaining all the stuff to him
>I say hi to his mom, we talk a bit
>she looks pretty interested in the game
>flex ma muscles a bit when get another droppod on the table
>ask her if she is mirin
>she replies "what did you say?"
>ask if she is mirin again
>ask if she wants to move a dreadnough
>casually touch her hip when I show her what a squad of marines can do
>my mates give me the "oh not this again" look
>boy is still playing with Greg, me and his mom get in the store room in the back
>fuck the shit out of her
>after she gets out she is all messed up
>boy asks "mommy, what did you do? Played a game too?"
>I just grin and say that his mom is a hot bitch servitor
>he starts to cry
>everybody laughs at them, the mom is terribly embarassed
>on the way out the crying boy stumbles and falls flat on his face
>space marines and meltas falling out of his pockets

>>17054928
>circular John Lennon style glasses
For a convenient heads up, those are called teacup shades, or teashades.

>>17054937

boring untrue story is boring. Try again.

Some kid pulled out a Space Wolves army. I pulled out a rubber mallet and smashed every single model.

>>17054907

Tau player here, pretty sure that ain't tau'va. Shame on the bastards.

>>17054937
> Greg
JERUSALEM WILL BE TAKEN!
>GW store
Stop dreaming, faggot. Alegris will never be GW store. And it never was.

>>17054831
I suspect this is the reason I want to be the little girl.

One time I was in my local LGS/Comic Shop, and I saw a bunch of guys setting up a Catan board. There was a Warhammer Tourney going on in the back of the store. One of guys playing WH has a kid who isn't that interested. Sees the Catan board. Turns out they have room for another, so they let him join. Kid's like eight or nine.

Now I myself have never played Catan, but I'm told that it's about economics, trade, and resources. This kid had somehow, very early in the game gotten a lot of wood, as well as sheep.

He announced this to the entire store. He opened up with what can only be described as mad scientist laughter "Now that Shawna has given me wood, with my abundance of sheep soon my master plan shall be unstoppable!"

Every single person in the store met each others eyes, silently communicating one thought "he's 8, he has NO IDEA WHAT HE JUST SAID, don't laugh.

He kept going. Apparently his plan was to get all the wood and all the sheep, and then cockblock everybody. Some combination of 'sheep' 'wood' and 'master plan came from that table for the next three hours.

Same kid, with the help of a huge neckbeard who I honestly think wanted to be Santa when he grew up, made an ork army like a year later and brought his unique brand of insane troll logic to that game. My personal favorite being the time when he decided his orks had somehow found out about the human concept of giving gifts, and had built a box big enough to contain their entire army with 'to humies, from da orkz' written on the side. when concentrated artillery fire destroyed his entire army in one turn, he yelled "Noooo! My scheme!" at the top of his lungs. Kids fucking awesome.

>>17054873
That's astute, though.
Pic related for you.

>Be in local GW
>Kid about 12 walks in
>Kid says he doesn't play many games but wants to learn so challenges me to a game
>Im running tourny space wolves
>The kid is using codex marines
> I show the kid the best set up to use for his army
> Tell him about the best tactics to use against me
>keep him right and give him pointers
>Kid loses badly but loved the game because he learned loads
> at the end of the game I help him right a better list with more dakka and less waste
> next week he curb stomps his mates army
> Kid always speaks to me and is a mini bro

It really annoys me when people get angry at the new players and kids, if you sit there and help them learn they're normally are pretty cool guys. Christ is it so hard to to give up half an hour to help a table of new players out rather than rage at them?!

>>17054873
jokes on you, i never had a mother figure

>>17055039
When I first started playing I had zero help, and just got stomped by everyone because I didn't know what to field and just used what my favorite were. Also wasted a ton of my very little allowance money on things that were bad and not useful. Oh well.

>>17055028

>"Now that Shawna has given me wood, with my abundance of sheep soon my master plan shall be unstoppable!"

>"Noooo! My scheme!"

This kid is awesome.

>>17055085
I feel bad for you man, I would have helped you but I like to think if you help someone and you're willing to teach people how to play you end up with a brilliant gaming community.

>>17055085
I still play with my favourite units and don't give a fuck about sporthammer. Rubric marines HO!

>>17055067
Shouldn't you be on /k/ or /hc/ or something more macho than 4chan?

Was a while back, with the previous ork codex. Was 15-16, hitting up the not-even-a-little-bit-local GW while mum bulk-shopped. Saw a much younger kid playing against a few older players, guess they would have been 19-20, but they could have just been the same as me at the time. While I'm there playing against my younger brother, the older kids beat him a few times. Some stuff seems kinda cheat-y from the tau guy, but I don't really think it's my place. I figure that they might want a fairer match, and ask if one of them wants to play me, figure my little brother can play against the other kid.
>"Oh what you play?"
Orks
>Cue laughter at my "weak" army. Phrase "Orks can't shoot." thrown about.
>Tau (Shitty paintjob, poor effort) and IG (Gue'vessa army actually, was really well painted, and worked well with the old doctrines. A bunch of cool conversions) player on the other side, the kid they were playing with has orks (Poorly done, but better then the tau player who said loudly and repeatedly "Orks are so bad converters and painters can feel good.").
>When brother decides he's too cool for more warhams today, I get conned into orks vs. Tau & Friends. I'm all pic related.

>>17055197
I ran a min-maxed ork dakka list. 3 mobs of flash gits, big shootas everywhere, tankbustas, lootas and some buggies/big gunz. Kid has a poorly built combat army, with more toyz then boyz, etc. IG list is good, but not uber, and very fluffy. Tauguy spammed pathfinders and broadsides.
Objective game (we decided on a pile of VERY IMPORTANT BARELS on the kid's insistance to use his objective marker he converted).

My goal in the battle was to get the annoying tau player. When deployment came around, he saw shooting ork units and thought it'd be easiest there. I kept deploying in front of him, he kept picking in front of me, so it basically became two games, just on the same table.

Managed to out-shoot tau player while IG player shot up the kid's orks charging across the table. I give him a few tactical tips, warboss to warboss and catught the tau-guy cheating a few times. Correct him, as if it's a mistake, he stops.

Game essentially comes down to a combat between the kid's warboss, and a badass IG sergant (with that upgrade medal thing that makes him basically a heroic sr. officer). I feel a little embarrassed, was so focused on cleaning up the tau player with my "inferior" firepower that I forgot the objective. Kid fluffs his rolls, warboss dies. Kid seems a little upset, tau player looks ready to gloat, and the IG guy just smiles, and points out that the squig hasn't attacked. Technically the squig should have been removed with the warboss, but I figured I'd let the kid have it, and tell the IG guy afterwards.

>>17055207

Squig bites the last wound of the sarge, and is the last surviving model anywhere near the Barrels of Utmost Importance. We rule that he carried the day, with his squig (dubbed pumba, the big squig) and the IG player told the kid he'd help him convert a squig with an IG arm in it's mouth sometime (Turns out they knew each other). Kid goes off happy when he gets collected, and am talking to the IG player as we play another game (Tau player is hunting thorugh my rulebook, determined to find how I "cheated" and outshot him with orks). Let him know he actually won it, and he just says "Yeah, I know. Kid was happy though."

Most bro player I've ever run into.

>>17055197
>Cue laughter at my "weak" army. Phrase "Orks can't shoot." thrown about.
>yfw it's not the shootaboyz that they need to worry about

>ortoEac 9/22/1992

HOLY SHIT CAPTCHA, HOW DID YOU KNOW MY DATE OF BIRTH?

Happened recently. I was at Games Workshop 12 year old kid comes in with Dark Eldar. Now I have only just got back into the hobby, but as far as I can recall, Dark Eldar were for serious hard core players. He challenges me for a fight and I oblige. His Archon sliced through my marines while the Kid provided a narration ( "Archon Judas cut through the Angels of Death like they were nothing").

I won by the skin of my teeth but fuuccckkk me man. That kid was goood

>>17055140
there's nothing more macho than hanging out with dudes wanting to be little girls

>>17055226
It "was" the orks with guns he needed to watch. Your pic related, every time they realise that I had more mobile firepower then they did. Five big shootas (4 in the mob, one on the nob) plus a couple bullet catchers. 3rd ed. codex in 4th, flash gits were great. Every time though, they focused on my small assault element of warboss and nobs, made to be stupidly 'ard, and not much else.

Vs gunlines, they rocked all the jocks. I could kite anyone who had less firepower at 36" then me. Transports were tankbusta'd, loota'd and Zzap'd (yeah, I remember when they were good) and generally meant that they couldn't engage my army properly.

Vs assault armies, I could move and stall, firing for max time, then when I couldn't stall no more, charge them. Even shootas were attacks2 remember, 3 on charge, and double init on successful PotW. Lost combats became mob ups, became shoot and charge.

>>17055288
>Archon Judas

That kid has a great imagination, the name isn't Eldar like at all but fits perfectly

>>17055313

If we were more social, we'd be the token white person in every gangster's retinue. The one that's there because he or she has no concept for human worth, and only lives to destroy.

I don't have many /tg/ stories involving children because I don't wargame or play MtG, and children usually don't go for euros or 5-hour fuckcomplicated ameritrash boardgames.

The only LGS chain in my country runs some board games, and when I'm there, I often visit to get my board game fix. I played some nice lighter game with two 14-year-olds (it may have been Citadels) and a fun little game of Pinguïn Party with the store's owner's two 10-year-old daughters. All the kid's I've interacted with in /tg/-related settings have been willing to learn and very fun to game with.

>Local warhams 40k tourney
>Asked by the black shirt to be the ringer and only play if an odd number of people show up (we are good friends, and I pulled prizes in the last two tourneys)
>Odd number of people show up, I can't play, oh well
>Little kid (about 13, and a regular at the store) says he wants to change his list before entering, and asks to borrow my Swarmlord for the the tourney.
> Say yes
> knocks it off the table while setting it up for the first game, and it shatters into a dozen pieces
>god damn kids
>mfw

>>17055390
You said "yes"
He heard "If I get this back in 1 piece I will violate you"
You asked for that.

>>17055207
i remember when flash gitz were worth taking

>>17055288
usually, not often

>4th edition
>play dark eldar
>dad and maybe 13-yo daughter come in to store for scheduled 4v4 megabattle
>she starts unpacking dark eldar
>raise an eyebrow at the dad, who is unpacking eldar
>"it's my old army, man"
>game starts, 2 de + eldar + csm vs ig+black templars+necrons+sm
>my wyches grinding down the bt
>csm in shootout with sm
>eldar dicking around with imba-falcons in vs destroyers
>she hits the ig flank with a perfect angle and rolls up the entire 1750pt army in a series of sweeping advances losing maybe a couple hundred VP out of 1500
>then throws up a raider for los, reembarks all her troops and begins rolling the necrons too with a 22" charge
>mfw

>>17055550
'not always' rather

>>17055390
>Letting little kids touch your stuff

>>17055390

Not the kids fault you're a fucktard.

>>17055604
>borrow someones model
>knock it off the table and destroy it
How is it not his fault?

Watching 2 friends play warhammer, trying to teach his kid how to roll dice underhanded instead of just chucking them.

Give up.

And hour later he fucking does it on his own. Everyone stops playing the stupid game and cheers.

>>17055621
What's the significance of rolling underhand?

>>17055039
I'm the new guy at my 3 hour drive FLGS.
Owner is cool as shit, his assistant is bored and uncaring, and the people there are generally a bag of neckbeard dicks.
I am treated as an unwated nuisance. what the actual fuck.jpg.
sadly, only kids we've had down there have been 12-14 year old dickweeds. One seriously and honestly thought he was going to buy my marine army for 50$.
"dude, that's army is worth 50$ tops"
"...there's over 650 $ retail of marines here, do you HONESTLY think I'm giving them to you for below my sale price of 250$?"
"yeah."
thank god that kid moved.
Ya'lls stories make me superbly jealous. At least I have my nephew to look forward to once he's old enough.

>>17055604

>Implying it's full retard to lend a model to someone who shows up there regularly and asks nicely.

For all you know that dude's lending of the model to a child will eliminate a full grown d-bag in the future

>>17055644
Possibly having better control over your rolls and not having those things jump around like a little plastic bouncing betty.

>>17055390
duude no, don't let em borrow it

>Working at my FLGS, have a FMN
>12 year old kid shows up with a W/U deck, using just whatever he has
>Gets stomped on my tournamentfags
>Get made fun of by same assholes
>I tell the kid "Hey, we got one last pack of worldwake. Tell you what, you don't get anything cool, It's on me."
>Kid smiles, grabs his pack and flips through the cards
>Kid explodes in excitment
>He Pulled Jace
>Looks at Holo
>He pulled a Holo Jace
>mfw

>LGS
>playing ordinary 40k game
>person watching game behind me without my knowledge
>feel something on my neck
>proceed to pop it
>hear someone wretch, spit, and then throw up on the ground.

Evidently my zit popped into his mouth.

>my bad bro

>>17055748

>>17055748
Dude that is awesome.

>>17055748

I didn't realize this was a thread about kid stories.

Sorry for off-topic, that's the only one I've got.

>>17055748
I lol'd.

>At the same FLGS, again magic.
>My friend's playing slivers
>New kid is playing mono black with whatever he can get his hands one
>Friend lulz has gets out 60+ 71/75, First Strike, Lifelink, Trample, Shroud, Poisonous, etc, etc.
>Kid knows he's fucked. Plays a card anyways.
>Plays Plague Sliver
>My Friend's FW

>>17055728
> Space + Rock n' Roll
That is my new wallpaper.

>>17055790

Does that mean the owner of a sliver will take 1 damage for each sliver he has in play?

(so the kid has 20ish turns and your friend can't play his slivers?)

I don't play mtg, only watch on occassion.

>>17055810
>Does that mean the owner of a sliver will take 1 damage for each sliver he has in play?

Yes.

The player who had loads of slivers out would take damage and die at the start of his next turn, before getting a chance to attack.

>>17055790
haha oh wow
>>17055810
No, for every sliver his friend had, he takes one damage on the next go. If he didn't kill the sliver, he would have died due to his own cards.

>>17055810

I means that everyone will take 1 damage, per sliver under there control during the upkeep. So my friend would be taking 60 damage per upkeep, while the kid only take 1 damage.

>>17055790
>>17055810

Oh, I thought this was first round. Didn't read the post closely enough. Friend already had 60 slivers.

Gotcha.

>>17055644

What, do you roll your dice like you're throwing a baseball?

>>17055865

What? Do you give a shit how people drop shaped stones?

>>17055883

Yeah if you don't want to look like a fucking mongoloid.

>At FLGS with bro
>Going to play a low point game for a change
>Orks vs. Imperium
>see kid standing around with a box of orks, waiting for a game
>walk over
>Lean down
>"Hey kid, wanna WAAAAAAAGH!?"

>>17055883

>> I eat with my fork gripped full fist like a faggot.

I've played a couple of games with some kids.

Never again.

Worst games I've ever had.

>>17055905
>go to a manga con, just to troll weaboos with a "faggot" pancard
>Find guy dressed as ork
>Yell "WAAAAAGH" at him
>He sais "wag" faggot.
>See guy as Cadian
>"Deux ex machina" on his weapon
>Ask him for it
>"I'm more of the admech than Imperium"
>What
>Look at his hand /b/ pin
>He is /k/ /b/
FUCK SPAIN.

>>17055946
what?

>Be at my old highschool
>They're holding a con of sorts in the aircraft hanger (trade school)
>Yugi-oh, magic, 40k, infinity and various other games
>See the game with the biggest crowd is a match between a neckbeard and a kid about 14 or 15.
>Kid is completely wiping the neckbeards eldar with IG
>When the kid wins, the neckbeard slaps one of his rangers off the table
>Kid sits there with a small smile and says "You seem frustrated."

Kid got his shit slapped next round, but kept smiling the whole time, why can't we have more players like this?

>>17055946
Care to re word that?

>>17056967

>go to a manga con, just to troll people and buy shit to build.
>Find guy dressed as ork
>Yell "WAAAAAGH" at him
>He replies a faggy "wog"
>See guy dressed as a Cadian
>Kinda cool.
>Look at his weapon
>"Deux ex machina" on his weapon
>Ask him about it
>"I'm more of the admech than Imperium"
>NIGGRA WHOT?!
>Look at his hand /b/ pin
>Ask him about /tg/
>He doesn't go to /tg/ and thinks /tg/ is gay
FUCK SPAIN.

I played a kid at a tournament and he was pretty bad, not reading cards and making mistakes. I felt mean, but I didn't point out strategic errors he made. I would have done in casual, but this was a tournament...

>>17054066

I've never seen an Apoc game where a kid doesn't look disappointed every turn.

>>17059648
What should you do in this kind of situation, where the kid makes mistakes you could help him with, but it's a tournament?

>>17062184
Casual games are the time to learn. Tournaments are the time to show what you've learned.

>>17062257
That honestly seems like a rather dickish philosophy.

>Elementry School Teacher
>Talking to class one day, one of them mentions their older brother playing something called "Dee and Dee"
>Ask me what it is
>I play it and I go on a long monologue about how awesome it is
>Kids are excited, some want to play
>Decide to start an after-noon club for the kids where I'll DM
>First session
>mfw

These kids are the best goddamn players I've ever DM'd for.

And there so goddamn innocent...

>>17062412
Why do you think I only played magic the gathering casually for a few months in my freshman year of high school?

>Girlfriend and I talking about forming a D&D group in our new town
>Her 10-year old sister asks what D&D is
>We explain RPGs to her
>"YOU'VE BEEN PLAYING THIS SINCE I WAS BORN, AND YOU NEVER TOLD ME ABOUT IT!?"
>Plotting Christmas campaign for her
>She wants to play a dragon. A fucking dragon.

Fuck yes.

we must archive this thread.

My son could not stand the noise and so many people for so long until he had a few years in him, but he's a very quiet and unobtrusive kid to begin with. It went a little better with my daughter, who was sleeping in her car-seat-rocking-crib-combo-thing from the very beginning.

to them its "attention", "company" and "people are laughing and happy therefore I must be having fun too", and believe me it saves a lot of headache with the girlfriend when "night out with the boys" means she's coming with you or you're watching the kids for her.

No swallowed dice, occasional crayon on some sheets, but that's our fault for forgetting to put everything away after every session. The boy's even started playing in our lighter games (he's 8).

>>17054831
You may not have missed out on much. Certainly there are many awesome guys and girls out there that will all but adopt you from day one, accepting that you come with your parent.

There's also that feeling when you realise mom's boyfriend is the idiot in >>17054765. And that's some of the lucky ones still.

Even today those stepmothers that think dad should be raising her kids and you belong elsewhere exist. Some may not even HAVE kids to take your place. Sometime, its a bitch or bastard that drinks, but daddy or mommy can't help but keep them around no matter how much they threaten you, because they're just plain desperate.

But the wierdest, most facepalm worthy of them all, was when my cousin married his step-mother after his dad's newest divorce. She was five years younger than he was. Pretty sure he was the one that got her pregnant too. Might have been why the divorce.

>>17054066

>>17062184
Tell him after the game or the match. If you're utterly crushing him, you can also get away with telling him right after the play.

>FLGS
>I come here every other week, but tonight I get here late
>My usual group's all playing already
>Sit down, work on painting some Wyches.
>Go to get a soda
>On way back, spot this game that's getting set up
>These two brothers, Orks vs. Grey Knights. It's the first game for both of them
>Basically teach them the rules from the ground up
>Warboss kills Draigo in single combat, I laugh.
>Game ends, Waaagh
>They challenge me, 1000 each for them, 2000 for me
>Pull out my Vanilla Space Marines, intend to play it like I usually do: competitively with a fluffy list.
>Plasma, Plasma Everywhere
>In the end, Draigo and the Warboss lead the bulk of their remaining forces into an Assault on my Command Squad and Sternguard
>Captain kills Draigo
>Warboss kills Captain
>Next turn, Company Champion avenges Captain
>They end up winning with objectives
>Scream praises to the Emprah

I now play those guys once a month or so

>Lictor model
>middle of apoc. Chaos army

>its face when

>>17054698

He wasn't pointing out the grammar, he was pointing out that it sounded like the dad and his son had a daughter together.

>>17062412
>>17062257
Well he's kind of got a point. Tourneys are dickish in general anyway.
>>17062449
Where were people like you when I was a kid? The closest thing I got to playing DnD before I turned 12 or so was when a friend of mine went to a con to pick up the books but his mom said no because it's a satanic game or something. He came back with Munchkin so it wasn't a total loss.

All changed in middle school when a kid moved in with a collection of misc RPGs. Turns out he collected the books for fun but never played any of them. I remember all of the kids wanting to play and the school staff yelling at the "jocks for making fun of us" when they were honestly excited in playing and had even rolled up characters. The guy's still a good friend and we game regularly.

And the closest I had to this was a sort of reversal to this. Having always been a fantasy collecter I decided to get into 40k after browsing /tg/. Some kids who had just turned 14 watched me and the previously mentioned friend have a proxy DE va Eldar battle. After that we did a 2v2 between us and two of them (Necrons and Tau). They didn't know all the rules so it was sort of a mess, but good fun. The highlight being a lone sore avenger who took on and won against a stealth suit team and almost beat his crisis suit in melee. After that I sold all the Tau I had previously collected to a friend of mine who plays 40k with his two kids. Still regret giving him the Tau instead of the Eldar.

>>17062760
I take that back, I brought my Savage Worlds book to a summer camp I work at and brought a few of the younger councilors into neckbeard-dom. That also cemented my intense love for the Savage Worlds system. After playing it I ha one of those "I don't need any other RPG anymore!" moments. Haven't had a chance to play it with my group until recently. Hope they like it as much as I do because I plan on using it a lot.

>Just got into WH40K
>Have a few figures sitting on my desk along with paints and brushes
>This spoiled little brat kid of a friend of my parents comes around. I hate him.
>Wants to play
>Reply that I'm busy
>"But I want to playyy-yyy" Whining
>"Not now, later, I've just got to finish this figurine up"
>The little fucker snags a 'nid warrior from my desk (the first figurine I ever painted) and says that he'll drop it to the floor if I don't play with him
>With perfect calm and an ice-cold voice: "You go ahead and drop that figurine and I'll see to it that you never play again"
>He's taken aback by this, being used to always having his way, and is clearly hesitant on what to do
>"Go ahead, drop it, and see what happens"
>He puts it back on the desk and runs to his mom, crying his eyes out about it
>His mother gives me a look that could kill, asking why I would threaten to kill him
>"I never threatened to kill him, that would be an exaggeration on his behalf"
>She knows that he's a spoiled little brat and just drops the matter.

This was a few years back. I still hate that kid.

>local geedub store
>have 2k worth of tyranids with a pretty decent list. Two regen primes, termagant/tervigon combo, hive guard, zoanthropes, warriors with swords everywhere, t-fex, ravaners and shrikes
>3 wounds, 3 wounds everywhere
>black autistic kid (no I'm not joking, he actually did have a degree of autism and it was noticable) challenges me with his mech BA
>heard he's a power player, so I decide to honour him by giving him a damn good game
>his list consists of something like two stormraven, some assault marines, techie and servitor, some land raider, baal predator, some terminators too, goes into detail about how his units can do this and that
>I show interest but rush us to get the game started
>spearhead, capture and control, 4 objectives, 1 on each corner
>turn 1 is mine, warriors and shrikes jump to my objectives, ravaners skirmish around to wait for delicious terminators
>hive guard explode a stormraven turn 1
>zoanthropes make sure his land raider can't do shit
>suppress all his mech and take things apart piece by piece, warriors rushing forward and slaughtering all in their path
>hold all objectives turn 3, he surrenders

Apparently he took it 'very well' because he shook my hand and didn't scream in my face. I heard the same kid got banned from all stores in my local area because he argued with a kid, kicked him in the shin, started full blown ragemode swearing at the store manager and refused to apologise.

Such is life in england.

>>17055385
So fa/tg/uys were almost straigh/tg/angsters?

>>17062859
ba-dum tss

>Hanging around the LGS
>Usual assortment of people are there, plus one kid at the weekly D&D session that the owner hosts
>Kid's getting unruly, apparently
>Laugh it off, carry on with the game I'm running at a different table
>Suddenly
>"You spoony bard!"
>Attention snaps back to their table
>The guy playing the bard is laughing his ass off, DM has apparently given up on trying to maintain order and calls a break
>Call a break for my table, too
>Intercept the kid, talk about his character
>Kid played Final Fantasy II on his parents' old SNES, made a Tellah character
>DM gets brought into it
>Break-time deals made
>Kid now plays in my games, thinks everything is a blast

>at gencon indy this last august
>hanging out by the battletech tables
>people playing Grinder style free for all
>little 12 year old boy played long enough at that table to get a 100ton Berserker with TSM
>that day each kill at that table netted you a free unpainted plastic mech mini asa trophy
>everyone else at the table had 1 or 2 trophies
>berserker kid had well over 13 or 14
>no one could could stop him
>kid is playfully taunting players up to 3x his age
>everyone else's face when a burning 100 ton melee monster that is missing almost its entire left side, a chunk of engine shielding, every weapon but its hatchet, and almost all its armor all over just keeps coming at them and cannot seem to die

by the time they finally put his berserker down, the kid had so many mech trophies in front of him it looked like a collection of poker chips

kid had game

>Go into local games store.
>Some family with a kid
>They get those free Magic starter packs
>Kid cannot decide which one to take
>I convince him and his dad to take white and black
>They sit at the table and start playing.
>I help them, explaining the rules.
>Kid loses
>Still says it was fun.
>That feel.

>I was the new one getting into 40k
>Me and my bud who joined together
>Bud's dad is practically famous at LGS
>We refuse any help from him
>Our motto: "Education through annihilation"
>Play 3000 point games against tourney players
>Play 1000 vs. 2000 point games
>Play 2 vs 2 constantly
>TANKS AND HORDES EVERYWHERE
>holy shit this is insane
>but this is fun

>I was the new one getting into 40k
>Me and my bud who joined together
>Bud's dad is practically famous at LGS
>We refuse any help from him
>Our motto: "Education through annihilation"
>Play 3000 point games against tourney players
>Play 1000 vs. 2000 point games
>Play 2 vs 2 constantly
>TANKS AND HORDES EVERYWHERE
>holy shit this is insane
>but this is fun

Everyone's face when watching us play

>hanging out at FLGS
>two veteran IG players rope a new necron player into playing against them
>I take pity on the poor cron player, and throw my lot on the table
>they each deploy three basilisks, along with other various cheese
>Turn one, I drop three Ironclad Dreadnoughts directly behind their basilisks
>by turn three, they had no armour left, forced to footslog IG against necrons and Spess Mahreens

I don't need to tell you how that game turned out, but suffice it to say people watch out for my dreadnought assault pods now.

>FNM
>I'm facing this little kid
>I was going to take it easy on him, but his dad is helping and practically playing for him.
>So I'm basically going up against his father, and through him, I tear this kid a new asshole.
>He becomes a bad sport and hopes I lose my future matches and what not.

I think he deserved that loss.

Someone archive this thread!

>>17063346

>Leaving room for dreads to drop behind Basilisks

>Teaching friend's 9 year daughter how to play the Pokemon TCG
>Her 5 year old sister sits next to me and watches
>I let her win but make it tricky for her
>5 year old turns to me
>"Did you lose?"
>"Yes, but it was a good game."
>"It's like you said before, it doesn't matter if you win or lose as long as you had fun."
>mfw

I told the oldest that when I first started teaching her and the youngest must have overheard. Having her remember and suddenly come out and say it...manly tears.

>>17064903

>Play DE.
>Lose against SW player.
>SW player doesn't offer hand to shake after game
>Gloats to his buddies across the store about how he won

>Lose against Tyranids
>Shakes hand after game, asks for another
>Play another and win
>Shake hands after game
>Now we're even
>Ask questions and learn about each others armies
>Meet at GW and play once a month

SW player was late twenties, nid kid was about 16

>in local GW
>playing demo game with a bro to show him how to play
>going well, knowledge being absorbed as game progresses
>12 year old kid comes in
>checks all the tables, nonchalantly checking for game endings
>comes to our table
>stays around for a bit, clearly noticing that none of the games are coming to a close
>bro starts rolling dice
>"you haven't been playing for that long, have you?" he asks my bro
>bro cheerfully says that it's his first game , wants to learn how to play
>12 year old leaves table, we continue with our game
>comes back with backshirt
>blackshirt pulls bro to side, tells him that if he wants to learn that tonight isn't the night that they have learning sessions.
>interrupt, telling blackshirt that I was teaching him by playing a game with his newly bought army
>bro sees potential shitstorm, packs up and leaves
>kid comes up to me, beams and asks for game
MFW

>>17065559
poster of this
bumping for more stories

>>17065559
And this is why any reasonable person would rather play anywhere but a GW store. Your floor, your bed, fuck even a small dining room table with small measurements. It all beats going to a GW store.

I went into one once, right after it opened. I had to scrub myself clean with a copper scrub pad and lysol.

I have a kind-of kid story. More like a teen story...
>at the local gaems workshop a few years ago with my dad. he's buying an assload of dwarves cause he has the money, I'm coming with to stare at whatever 40k army I was into at that time.
>he's done buying his dwarves, we were about to have a small 1000 point match with my Undead (whatever they were called back then, before they were split into two) vs his dwarves. He goes outside to go smoke.
>be outside with him, breathing in second hand smoke cause fuck the medical police
>guy exits from shop
>can't be older than 16
>asks my Father, who I had never seen break any rules up to that point, for a cig.
>my Dad gives him one
>manager sees it
>has a boner for the 16 year old or something
>asks us to leave for the day
>okay.jpg, sorry son we'll play at home
>my fucking face the entire time

>>17065633
I don't get it, your father broke the law, and you call the store owner a pedo? Your father is either your brother and your father at the same time, or you're a troll.

>>17065559
bumping dead thread
>walk into local GW
>13 year old kid at table, with an army thats almost immediately recognisable as brettonians
>asks if I want to play him
>I oblige, and we both agree on 1000pts
>things start going wrong when he deploys knights in ranks 4 wide
>let it slide, hoping that he corrects himself later on
>roll out my shield horde orcs. I roll first turn, and he prays.
>game continues, he still hasn't fixed knight unit
>he charges one unit with knights
>gets stuck in, only killing 1 orc with his 8 knights
>I strike back, killing 2 knights
>When combat res is calculated,
I non-chalantly say that if he had his knights in lance formation, the combat would have tied
>he shrugs, but doesn't fix his other unit.
>his peasants charge another unit of orcs, and he thinks they have the blessing
>no paladin in the unit
>concedes after both his charactsers die, with everything on his side running for the hills
>spend the next 5 minutes explaining every mistake he had made during the game
>says that he's played like that for ages, thanks me for advice
>say it's cool, glad I could help
>next week I play him again
>does everything wrong he did last time
>MFW

I have a few more if you want to hear them fa/tg/uys and ca/tg/irls

>>17065722
Sure.

>>17065633
Unless cig is nerd speak for something else I don't see the problem, if you hand out cigarettes to kids in any shop you will get kicked out.

Oh man, this thread's still alive. Well then.

>Painting models for an upcoming Mordheim game with a friend at my LGS
>Go outside to spray them
>Local kids see me and ask what I'm doing
>I show them some bestigors and tell them about the game
>They are amazed
>Tell them I've got even more cool shit inside
>I go in to get some more things to spray
>Come out with centigor and my converted shaman thing
>Kid points at centigor
>"You should call him something totally cool like... Like... Like mighty warrior!"

And lo, Mr Mighty Warrior was born.

>Buddy is a helper at a church youth club.
> I sometimes go along to keep him company
>Everyone there loves Yugioh.
>Buddy leaves his box of very expensive, ebay'ed, traded gods etc etc cards in a room as everyone goes off to pray.
>He comes back out to find...
>...a kid missing..
>..as well as the entire box of all those cards.
>His face when.

He never saw the little shit or his cards again.

>>17065758
>>17065675
No, it was totally cool. I don't care that we had to leave for the day. It was just that my Father had never done anything bad in front of my eyes.
It....
it shook my perceptions of reality.

>>17054631
THIS!

>>17065733
>At school league tournament 2 years ago(britfag here)
>16 year old me playing necrons for my school
>against a 12 year old dude playing vanilla marines
>has a few printed sheets resembling a codex
>oh boy here we go
>start putting my models on the table
>interrupted by the guy
>"excuse me" he asked "I don't know how to play"
>I put on my best false smile, trying my hardest not to laugh
>"So you want my guidance?" I asked
>the kid nodded, and we continued the game, me filling with my copy of the true rulebook every time he got stuck
>almost tabled him
>kid thanks me for a good game, content that he learnt how to play whilst playing.
>say it's no problem
>MFW he's one of the best players that school could muster

>>17062468
>she wants to play a dragon
>fuck yes
Just please don't make a turbo-sue brat out of her, will you please? When kids (or immature human beings of all age) play things like dragons and demigods, it goes to their heads. Bad End.
Pic related, what you could make her play.
Just my POV by the way, you don't have to listen to me.

>>17065900
everyone started with a sue dude, the deal is to evolve past that

>>17065909
I didn't. Started playing 1st ed. AD&D with my father in the late 90s. He stamped the flames of Suedom out in a single session, if that.

>>17065909
some of us started with buck-toothed town guard blokes you know

>>17065928
I started with a two-handed sword wielding dwarf fighter. I was about 9 at the time.
Beheading orcs, FUCK YEAH.
Meet a giant spider when we're running low on health, party agrees to run away.
Meet a green dragon, the party wants to get out of here since most of them are weak. My fighter who just finished resting and burned all of the cleric's healing magic to avoid death earlier steps forward and goes "I got this." Since you know, being a little kid, I think a dragon is something that is meant to be slayed.

Turns out dwarves melt quite quickly in acid.

I've been careful to pick my battles ever since.

I wish I had grown up in a region with a gaming culture. My first game of DnD was during my first year of college. Four and a half years later, I've been a part of at least one game for the entire time, usually more. My only thought? WHY DOES NO ONE IN SOUTH GEORGIA GAME.

>>17065909
I started with a LE sorcerer that had a dragon fetish (a sexual one) and an adamantium knife for problem-solving. And solve problems I did; there's not much adamantium can't cut through with a liittle elbow grease.

>Have niece with mother who's lived in trailer-park like conditions her whole life
>Niece watches an inhuman amount of television
>Niece is now 8 years old
>Try to teach her Russian after she asks what I'm studying
"I'm learning French everyone!"
>Stopped that
>Tried to teach her Dee and Dee
"I don't want to be a nerd!"
How I hate the television era. It's nice to know that some fa/tg/uys can have fun with kids, though.

>>17065900
Nah, just show the kid Skyrim and tell her dragons aren't invincible, so she better be careful.

[spoilersdon'tworkon/tg/]I know it's a lie but it might prevent the Mary Sue.[/waitwhatspoilerlol]

>m12 draft awhile ago
>little kid opens up a blank card in the pack
>this is pretty rare, but apparently it did happen more frequently with the m12 set
>store owner rushes over, apologizes, takes the blank card and gives the kid a kraken's eye to replace it (the blank card had replaced an uncommon)
>next week the store owner is boasting loudly about how he sold the blank for $50 online
>kid is right there when he's bragging about it

>>17065996
>dragons aren't invincible, so she better be careful.

But then she'll want to be a bear.

>>17065989
Monster Hunter does wonders for a young child's fear of monsters. Things aren't very scary anymore when you imagine half of it as new clothes, and the other half on your plate.

>at local GW for the re-release of the Dark Eldar
>supposed to be a megabattle going on (not Apocalypse, just a big game of regular 40k)
>only me and my brother show up
>deploy around 2000 points of Space Marines and Dark Eldar
>my bro's Archon had the wargear that boosts his strength when he kills an independent character
>kills my Captain, gets up to the point where he can kill Dreadnoughts
>charges my (immobilised) dreadnought and rips both of its arms off
>dread attacks back, does nothing
>Archon attacks back, we're both expecting the dread to die
>...chink
>dread lives
>combat goes on for about five whole turns with both of us horribly failing our rolls
>by this point a small crowd of regulars (around five or so) were stood around the end of the table cheering on my dreadnought
>finally manage to score just one wound, Archon is instant death'd
>crowd cheers

I lost, but that was the single best combat I've ever seen.

>>17066018
Did the Archon not have his 2+ shield?

>>17066004

You posted this story before didn't you? Still a sad tale. Was there no judge at the moment? I think it's stated somewhere that the person who opens a black card should get a new booster (for free).

>>17066032
He did, but he failed it.

>Be socially awkward 13 year old
>Go to learning how to games workshop day
>Horrified by all the retards in there
>Never come back
>Put me off the hobby

I havent been back since, I just come here for the fluff and because I like the community.

>>17054907
> this story restores my faith in humanity

>>17066087
That's funny, with your image you've crushed mine. I thought /tg/ was safe, goddamn it.

>>17066108

>>17066018
Can a dread still inflict instant death when its DCCWs are broken? Its strength drops to 5 doesnt it?

>>17054907
If this were done at a GW shop, and it was a Red or Blackshirt doing this, I would immediately shop there forever.

>>17066187
Archons are ID'd by anything with STR 6 or more.

>>17066223
Does a spacemarine dread stay at str 6? Im only going off what would happen to a deffdread which are incapable of IDing anything after its arms fall off.

>>17066250
Yes a rifleman dread or one that has had its DCC destroyed strikes at S6. Enough to still instant kill guard and eldar though.

>>17066279
You can still make armor saves though, as I recall. Doesn't really help most Guard and DE characters, at least not unless they have FNP by then.

>>17066345
S6 ignores FNP for DE

So he's either relying on his 5+ armor or 4+ ghostplate or the 2++ shadowfield

ok ill bite
>setting up battletech game on Friday at FLGS.
>one of the fnm guys brings his kid
>kid wants to play mite be cool so i say ok
>hand kid pile of spare record sheets tell him to pick one
>picks timber wolf good choice but calls it by i.s. name >troll him with clan name all night find out he played >mechwarrior
>i pick hunchback game starts
>at some point kid runs right up to my hunchback
>literally one hex away right in front
>he moved first so i just sit there
>then its time to shoot he unloads with lrms and large >lasers ask if hes firing any thing else
>says he doesn't want to over heat
>unsurprisingly misses with lrms hits with one of the >lasers i shoot back with ac20 and decapitate his mech
>whines abut how i was right in front of him an should >have hit with all his missiles and how an ac20 cant one >shot a mad cat explain to him that i have been playing >the game since be fore he was born
>tell him to come back when he learns some respect.

>>17066983
You sound like an snide, bitter old fuck. And I'm 33, and I'm still not as old as you.

I bet your beard is so long, it has a beard.

>>17067015
i tried to help him but he just went by the vidya even when i
tolled him the timber wolf had longer range then my
hunchback and he did not want to move right in front of me.

>>17066983
>kid wants to play
>you make fun of him
>you make fun of him some more
>kid never wants to play again because of neckbeard assholes
>father who wanted to share a hobby with his son is like, what the fuck you asshole

>>17067063
he insisted on calling it a mad cat so i insisted on calling it
a timber wolf the dad was playing magic and is not well
liked only reason he hasn't been banned yet is that he buys a booster box every time he comes in.

>>17067063
This. I mean, what the hell, ma?. You could've at least clued the kid in that LRMs have a minimum range in tabletop. Or given him some idea of his ideal range band. Or hell, have just won gracefully and offered to swap 'mechs, since the Hunchback seems to fit his play style better than the Timber Wolf.

Seriously dude, shit like that is why more people don't get into this hobby.

>>17066056
>because I like the community

If you can handle us, you can handle your local GW.

>>17067097
So wait, lemme get this straight. Not only are you a massive tool about Clan names vs. Inner Sphere names, but you also worked out your dislike for a grown-ass man in the most passive-aggressive way possible, namely by fucking with his kid?

I can't even begin to describe how far down the totem pole of humanity you fell with that one, dude.

>>17066983
I don't know anything about Battletech but it sounds like you were the asshole in this one, bro.

>>17054873
>>17054831
>YFW you volunteer with kids so that you can be the hero you never had.

I volunteered at library to earn stupid high school community service hours. Met a little kid with a dad dying of cancer and mom with 8 - FUCKING EIGHT- kids with another on the way. The kids gave me the "I don't like reading" shit. I made a deal where he'd teach me Yu-Gi-Oh for the last half of the lesson and I'd teach him the coursework for the other half.

6 years later, I get invited to his public school graduation, where he thanks me for teaching him this shit, because now he can read animu fansubs & shit. He hopes to become a soldier or cop. From what I know from his teachers, he's well on his way.

I am so goddamn proud (even though the little fucker still beats my ass at Yu-Gi-O)h

>>17067290
Fuck, I need a better picture for that post.

Wow, my thread sure got long.

I would like to see this thread archived so bump

>>17065900

Guy who posted the original Fuck yes, I'm going to talk to her about it. Her sister and I think that it should be downgraded to either a Half-Dragon or a Dragon-Disciple. I may just convince her to be a Dragon-blooded Sorceress and go nuts.

Not really sure, but she seems excited at the prospect. She wanted to play World of Darkness, but I decided against that for baby's first game. Dresden Files is something she wants to do later, though, so there's that.

This thread proves there are heroes left in man.

Have we archived it yet?

>>17054376