>>16684183
Eaten alive by children.

Desintegrated by the psionic wave of a giant flying Stingray.

Drained to death by a succubus.

>that's not unusual!

The succubus didn't touch her at all. She just enjoyed the performance of a play.

Granted I wanted to change characters anyway, but that was the weirdest way to go. Death by enjoying art.

Swarm of animated silverware. Forked and spooned to death.

Rode the Tarrasque rodeo-style down a bottomless shaft.

The king made a stone statue of me riding the Tarrasque and put it in the town square.

Raped to death. Entire party, actually. It was coincidentally also the last time I played with that DM. Fancy that!

Must have been when the party and my black one-handed mercenary opened a tomb to an ancient undead horror/lich. This was pretty low fantasy, and this thing was very powerful, so we died almost instantly and the island we were on was doomed. BAD END

Fell off a cliff from hundreds of feet after being chased by rabid daemonic slugs through a jungle for hours, hit the water (did i mention waterfall?), survived

And drowned.

Used a bunch of wishes at once to wish millions of demons into the void killing them and gaining a ton of exp and then exploding from too many levels too fast.

>>16684340
Stop playing FATAL.

I had a red-hot iron inserted into my rogue's anus after sleeping with the BBEG.

Gang raped by radioactive bears until I died.
Didn't even get any superpowers.

lungs were filled with food by an enemy cleric i miss that barbarian

Trampled by llamas.

Soul sucked out by an undead mountain god, thought he had a ring of invulnerability, turned out to be a ring of over confidence.

Buried alive by a party that failed Heal checks to realize that the Lich's touch only paralyzed me. Poor Wellby. 5th level Halfling Illusionist managed to go four rounds toe-to-toe with a 20th level Lich and seriously piss off said Lich before running out of tricks.

I had a party mess up disarming a trap. It trapped them in a treasure room where they then slowly starved to death. It was the damn-est thing, high level PCs, demon slayers, dragon killers, renowned heros. But the wizard couldn't get through the anti-teleportation wards and the barbarian was enfeebled and couldn't move the slab. Months of sessions, hard work, and strong characters. All just to watch them wither and starve.

I guess it was my fault as a DM, I didn't realize I'd put a single check in that could doom the whole group.

>>16684827
What were their faces like when you told them?

Spontaneous combustion. It was the damnedest thing. My rouge had just pick pocketed a rather wealthy wizard...

>>16684841
No one, including myself realized it at first. So they examined every inch of that chamber for about a hour before it hit me, they were sealed in...

It was actually kinda depressing, they decided to roleplay the days out, and then I had to describe the devastation the Big Bad wrought once they weren't there to stop him. We also decided to not reroll and pick it back up, that world was lost, destroyed.

Technically I didn't die, but my first character was sucked into a portal that made him cease to exist in the climax of the campaign. Only thing my party did was ask for me to throw them my Bag of Holding as I was being dragged in. I kept it, the bastards.

>>16684888

Or you could have just put in a secret tunnel out.

Vampire: the Masquerade

A player rolled Charisma + Etiquette and scored 8x '1's... on 8 dice. I ruled that the following happened.

"As you Prince LaCroix, with a rumble so charateristic of California an earthquake hits. The ceiling partially caves in, and you are run through by a metal ceiling beam. Fortunately, it missed your heart. As you consider getting up, the beam (which protrudes from the roof) is struck by lightning. Your impaled body is reduced to ash in front of the startled Prince."

By this point the entire group were in paroxysms of laughter. Even the player whose character just bought it was chuckling and covering his face. I just shrugged apologetically and asked what else I was supposed to do with an octuple botch...

At an old age, living his twilight years in retirement... of natural causes (heart-attack).

No shit... longest living character I had.

>>16684933
Gah my dyslexic fingers have failed me. Sorry about the typos at the start guys.

>>16684888
No high level party should run out of food. unless it was anti magic with a adimantine door with the barb having 3 str. Seriously, they could have gotten out if they tried.

>>16684931
No, we had all agreed to a super pure campaign. They didn't want it. Not every adventure is has a heroic ending.

>>16684963

True. But it really is your fault for putting in a single check that would kill your campaign.

Unless that was your goal all along.

>>16684963
I hope that treasure room shows up in a later campaign with a extra few skeletons laying around.

My brother had a dwarven warmage with one eye, who upon watching an elven ninja fail a check and fall into a lava pit decided to instantly retire from adventuring on the spot and retire.

>>16684952
I'm telling ya, it was a terrible sequence of coincidences that doomed them. Just a little under prepared, resource drained, weakened. Believe me, we spend hours trying to figure a way out of that room.

>>16684972
>>16684981

It was my fault, but I mean come on, it was a DC 25 disable trap. Our rouge/sor could do that in his sleep. But he rolled a 1, and then a 2 to quickly roll past the falling slab to escape. I had no clue they'd all be in there at the same time, everyone passed the hidden trigger rolls I did as they entered. It was suppose to maybe trap one dude, and make them waste a valuable day getting him out (they were time crunched).

I put that room in a campaign some time after, they brought them out and gave them the hero's burial they deserved.

I'm telling you guys, this was no "LOL I GET DRUNK!" campaign. It was a very serious adventure, with a lot of thought put into it from everyone.

>>16685009
In a week any str based char could have power attacked their way through anything

>>16685079

Why the anti-teleportation field?

Most of my character deaths have been to other players.

One time I was killed by the party assassin for noticing him kill someone else. Another time I was killed by the party rogue so he could become an assassin. So I'm not a big fan of assassins.

There was one time where my party was fighting six balors. We hit them all with spells to weaken them, and then killed a few of them off with regular attacks. Then the DM pointed out that balors explode when they die. The first two explosions killed off another balor, which killed the remaining three. TPK.

>>16684792
>thought he had a ring of invulnerability, turned out to be a ring of over confidence.
This is a great idea.

>You put the ring on. You feel invincible, like nothing can hurt or stop you!

>>16685099
He could barely lift his sword by that time. A custom monster I had, called a purgoloth had drained him down to the bone.

>>16685173
And they didn't have a cleric? Or potions? okay wait three days, or only power attack as long as he can rage.

>>16685150
The wizard had this habit of creatively teleporting into places he shouldn't. And ya know, it's just a standard high level dungeon defense I think. It wasn't just some forgotten crypt either, it was a larva mages armory in the shadowfell.

>>16684366
Oh man, your fucking DM
Hahahaha

I was once playing 40k and my units ran off the edge of the board...

>>16684827

I was once trapped in a similar box with a wizard.

As part of our quest to destroy a cabal of high level liches I had been researching lichdom heavily and had by that point figured out a way to make myself a lich and after waiting for my party to free me (they never did, were were split into two groups and the other two in my group got teleported half way around the world in another trap.) I turned myself into a lich.

.......I remained trapped in that room for two hundred years before some adventurers accidentally broke me out. By that point I was half mad AND a lich.

>>16685377
You kill those adventures?

>>16685403

.............I went to hug the first one who walked through the door and she shot a bolt at my head. I then killed them all and animated the rogue who broke me out.

>>16685447
Imagine there surprise. In some alternate universe were they were the PCs, their dickhead DM put a lich in a sealed chamber for a group of low level PCs,.

>>16684715

It wasn't FATAL. it was D&D

>>16685466

Huh. Hadn't thought of it that way. What a complete dick move.

Though I will admit the experience gave me new experience for what it is like being an undead trapped in a dungeon. My DM made me roll a d20 for every decade I was down there to see what happened. I heard footsteps twice and once heard someone yell. Not a very fulfilling existence.

Anyone lost a PC to them being sucked into the womanhood of a giant mother-of-monsters, deposited in her womb and then them slowly transforming into a fetus to be reborn as one of her monster children?

It's not pretty.

>>16685523
>Day 4532. A small beetle found it's way into my chamber today. It was the first chance I'd had to soul drain something in decades, what a day.

>>16685544
Seriously guys. Quit playing FATAL.

>>16685544

w-what

>>16685544
Whelp, I think that about does it for this thread.

In the middle of giving a speech to rally the peasants, my paladin got hit by a catapult. Not the boulder; the villain used an enlarge spell on his pet dragon who physically threw a 12 ton catapult at me.

>>16685565

Day 22995: Ninety days since I heard the footsteps. Decided this morning to stop screaming, whoever was here has probably left. Tomorrow will start counting the blocks in the wall again. Going to guess there are 4535 of them, same as last time.

>>16685703
>Day 45321 My experiment to imagine a new personality from birth up in my mind isn't going well. He got beat up by imaginary bullies again and imaginary school. Also, the sound of this growing moss is deafening, I gotta do another scraping.

Magic Super Diarrhea.
It was not a pretty way to go.

>>16685703

>Day 25668: Turned 100 today. Figured it was an important day drew smiley faces of blocks 2222, 1111, 3333, and 4444. I then invited my new friends to a party. It was rather awkward, I couldn't get any conversation flowing.

>>16685798
Day 52903: Imaginary Larry had an interesting day today, as he killed his first kobold. He kept its severed head as a trophy. That will teach them Larry...that will show those bastards.

>Day 2591: Realized today that I have been wearing the same underwear for seven years. I am disconcertingly bothered very little by this realization.

I had a Human Town Guard once that would go weekly and play a fantasy board game with other guardsmen and friends. One session, as they called it, one of the other townsfolk attending had brought some new polyhedrals (which they used as random outcome generators of sorts).

Turns out the gypsy he had bartered them from in the tavern had passed onto him some heavily cursed stones. It transported everyone playing into the world of their game, and as they quickly found out, if you came under harm in the game, you came under harm in real life.

While they were trying to get out the real world town was besieged by a wandering horde of nomadic goblin warriors and their lifeless bodies around the table were killed.

>>16685885

So...They went to bed and woke up dead?

>>16685922
It was more like a bad end "Are you afraid of the dark" episode. They were lost in their game world forever, as their mortal coils were laying devoid of blood and important organs.

Decided to jump into the large pit of green glowing goo, intentionally drank some for a laugh, took a violent reaction to the substance and died.

>>16685885
"So I kicked him in the head 'til he was dead, ha!"

>>16685851

>Day 56278: Treachery! Imaginary Larry (or Lord Larry as he styles himself now) has decided to retire from adventuring. Citing a long and successful career adding to the fact that he is getting older and wants to settle down with that cheap elvish whore his is always with (I have warned him about her, why won't he listen?) He has promised to stay in touch, to write and stop by to visit, but claims that he really is looking forward to retirement. Mutiny! We still haven't gotten the crown of red thrones from the lair of the Red Wyrms!

>>16685956
We actually rerolled as goblins in that horde, but the deaths in that campaign branch were very normal.

Random adventuring party, well defended town, rival clans, and natural disaster/lack of resources.

Had a pacfist force adept with battle mind/battle meditation, and a few other feats that allowed him to extended his sensory range in the force; along with give large groups of peoples benfits. The party had been treating him very badly for 6 sessions because of his naivaty and beliefs of the force and human nature. It was held during the Mandolorian war and he had just witnessed 3 worlds being bombed by the Mandoes. Early in the day he had a discussion with a Jedi in the party about using the force to protect people. His pacifistic roots were tested yet again when the planet the party was going to invstigate for some dark side artifact had 3 mandalorian captial class ship orbitting and ready to deploy for war. He had enough and could feel the suffering and fear of those of the planet underneath him. So he looked himself in the room and used dominate mind to control every mando on those three ships and order them to fly directly into the sun. I used a force point to boost the role and every ship began flying towards this blue dwarf star. The party didn't realize what was going on until it was almost too late. As the jedi on board was using up his vitality in a failed attempt to force push the ship into a different orbit. My character was draining his life force to continue his control over all of these people. The jedi realized that the power was coming from his ship and stormed into my characters room, cutting down the door. He asked "what are you doing?!?!?!" my character in a trance responded "Becoming the new God of peace" The Jedi cut his head off in a single blow, saving one of the three ships.
It was a pretty epic way to go.

not me but one of the people in my group.

His lvl 2 barbarian found a temple in the mountains with an old hermit looking after it. inside was a well full of liquid metal. He told the adventurers that the gods of the mountain use it to grow more powerful.

after much deliberation and warnings from the hermit that only the very strong can survive he jumped in, dead.

ironically the monk decided to try next, rolled a nat 20 on the fortitude check and survived.

>>16685978
I just realized how I could be the dream of a lich trapped in a treasure room.
Cool.

>>16685978

>Day 60341: Had that dream again where my mother and sister were making out naked again. My therapist said that this is perfectly natural and not to search for too much meaning in my dreams. I am still bothered by this though. This is most likely because I do not sleep and there is no therapist.

>>16685978
>Day 665042 I've finally re-remembered how to speak common. Note, do not invent new languages when none else can speak it. I'll have to go to Larryville and see if the blacksmith has finished making my cat.

injected themselves with a vial of ancient atlantian nanites that translate things

>>16686030

Play your next character as a guy who believes himself to be the product of a half insane/ bored lich in a treasure room's imagination.

>>16686050
>Day 665093: Used some clothing fragments to make a doll for Larry's daughter. Even though she's a half-elf, children of any race deserve to have nice things. I am her godfather, after all. On a side note, I never considered how long my hair would get after not cutting it for so long. It's rather appalling.

airborne American black bear

>>16684946
It's dysgraphia not dyslexia. Dyslexia is when you read, dysgraphia is when you write.
Or it could be sloppiness.

>Day 9496: Today I was finally able to run up the side of the wall and do a double back flip while landing on my feet. Wish someone was around to see it. Wish I had spent the past few years trying to master something more productive.

Door slammed in his face.

Had a couple of guys who loved slamming doors in other characters faces using psychic powers because it was undetectable. But they didn't quite catch that my character was nearly dead from the last battle.

DM had the biggest shit eating grin on his face.

>>16686075
>>16686030
So what happens if it turns out to be true? So what happens when this character inevitably comes across a liche sealed in a treasure room and sets him free? Cease to exist? Continue on with the adventure as the Liche's imaginary friend? Become the lich?

>>16686080

>665100 I've got to show Larry this new invention of mine. It's a thin metal plank, sharpened along both edges and brought to a point at one side, and wrapped in leather on the other. I think I'll call it, a cat.

btw, I've saved all this for my BigBad lich in an up coming campaign I'm running. Excellent.

>>16686127

>Continue on with the adventure as the Liche's imaginary friend?

This! you are now a Lich's imaginary friend. It is time to adventure!

> playing a american merc who is hired to kill a drug lord in columbia by Dole.
> one of the scouts
>fail climb/sneak check, fall infront of 2 gaurds
> shoot my way out of the room
>next room has a shitload of cocain on the table
>rub cocain in wounds to steralize/keep awake
> manage to get to emergency medvac with another shot in the ass, putting more cocain into the blood stream
> fail 3 fort rolls and one will save.
> be put in a asylum for od on cocain/blood lose/mental stress/ptsd speak to floating jelly fish for the rest of the short life

>>16686140
>>16686133
>>16686118
>>16686080
>>16686050
>>16686043
>>16685978
>>16685872
>>16685850
>>16685798
>>16685565
>>16685523

And so begins /tg/'s newest fad, Imaginary Lich Quest.

>>16686127
It turns out that you were brought into existence by the pure belief that you actually existed. So when you rescue the Lich, you could continue to adventure with him until it is revealed that you are a figment of his imagination brought to life, at which point you probably cease to exist on the spot.

>>16686163
That could be good. I'll be looking forward to that.

>>16686167
Or perhaps the lich will and he's ben a fragment of your mind all along. Maybe his phylacriphy broke years ago and you are his re incarnated soul

>>16686167
But if you kill the Lich, maybe you could become him.

>>16686167
Or even better; a Tyler Durden.
There was actually a way out but the Lich's shizophrenic mind has kept him from noticing it while Larry is actually him conquering the land and fucking over the party.
Imagine their faces when they enter the last crypt in the BBEG's fortress of doom to find him greeting them gleefully as his saviours.

Then they possibly befriend him just to find out he is their enemy but he is also not.
Fucking quantum lich!

>>16686209
Imaginary Phylactery. That's fucking brilliant.

>Day 36525: Today is my hundredth year since I first entered this room. I decided that I would turn over a new leaf and wrote heart felt letters to both Nerva and Sonya telling them that I have finally forgiven them for leaving me in the place all those years ago. Nerva, that bastard half-elf (I am not being spiteful, he was born out of wedlock), is probably still alive. Full figured Sonya is sadly most likely deceased as she would be 124 and I seem to recall we humans don't usually live that long. Still, felt good to relieve myself of that anger. Can't seem to find the post office though.

>>16686219
>QUANTUM LICH!?
MY MIND IS BEING RAPED INTO A PUDDLE OF QUIVERING GOO

Not me, but I was running a weird session of Call of Cthulhu.It ended up becoming Call of Tarantino. My party was basically split into two separate groups, Vincent the back alley surgeon, and John Okwon, legendary Jazz Pianist,along with Vince's cousin Vincenzo,versus A guy in the Amish mafia, and an Asian Painter. With the criminal goons was an engineer, and a dilettante as hostages.

The party was fleeing from Innsmouth, since they committed some crimes in Arkham, and thought going there would be a good idea(it never is), and as soon as they got there, they accidentally shot an Innsmouthian. So they're running along the beaches, when the Mafia goons realize that they're going too slow, so they have to trust their hostages to walk unhindered.

John Okwon pulls out a golden brick he got from a previous adventure, and talks about the point of no return. Either he was going to cooperate, or he would die. The engineer tried to resist, so Okwon beat his face in with a brick, and tore off his face in an opium induced rage.

My Jedi ran into Vader's lightsaber so I could come back as a ghost and troll him as "Padme".

>>16686167
>>16686219
This is fucking impressive.

The only way to free yourself from a trapped room is to create an imaginary character so vivid and realistic, that character actually materializes in the real world and then opens the door to the room from the outside... Because the trapped room is actually a magically enchanted room for young wizards to study/practice trying to astral project or telekinesis their way out of the room.

>>16686446

I'm so using that idea.

Lich in the box.

I had my barbarian brazenly insult a powerful dragon in an attempt to provoke it (The damn thing kept calling us worthless insects every time we did something for it, and basically being a complete tool. My barbarian knew that if he threw the first punch, the party wouldn't do shit to help him, though.) The dragon immediately cast a spell similar to Command. The order it issued was "Sneeze with your eyes open."

It didn't kill him, but after much deliberation, the DM and the rest of the party decided that it rendered the barbarian mentally retarded. Or at least, too retarded to try to get the party killed in a similar manner in the future.

This has been the best thread I've had in months. Think for work. Maybe everyone's new lich NPC good well this weekend.

>>16686531

>>16686518
I think your DM and the rest of the party are mentally retarded ones here. Why the hell would they think it would do anything remotely like that?
And what drugs were they on to even consider the idea that it could be fatal?

>>16685565
>>16685703
>>16685798
>>16685850
>>16685851
>>16685872
>>16685978
>>16686043
>>16686050
>>16686080
>>16686118
>>16686133
>>16686241
I now want to see someone write "The Diary of a Trapped Lich", a series of entries like this as the Lich goes more and more insane from solitude.

>>16686604
This was back when we were all in high school. I think a week earlier or so the biology teacher said something about how you can't sneeze with your eyes open. When asked why, he just laughed and said that if you tried it your brain would explode.

The DM was the only one who thought it'd be fatal, though. Everyone else immediately argued that it was a bullshit call. The DM just wouldn't let up on the idea of it being severely disabling, since I was the only one who actually roleplayed and forced him to have his NPCs do something other than either attack us on-sight, or send us to go fetch some magical doodad from a cave full of spiders. It was basically a case of That DM, more or less saying that I was going to have to stop roleplaying my character or else he was going to have the dragon kill us all, castrate our corpses, and use our testicles as throwing weapons against our next characters.

>>16686628
That would be the best player handout.

Especially if they just found it in an otherwise empty locked room.

Alergic reaction to apples and left to die while a chamber filled with acid

>>16686730
allergies? what game were you playing?

My servo arm was hijacked remotely and used to embed my own power axe halfway through my skull.
To add insult it was then used to tear off my head and throw it at an ally.

I was fucking pissed about that one.
Curiosity really did kill the cat.

>>16686766
My guess would be one with very thoroughly generated PCs. No reason you couldn't give a D&D, nWoD, or Burning Wheel character deadly allergies...

The only way to destroy a lich's imaginary phylactory:
Break his mind with words and somehow break through their insanity with logic and reason.

Or just be a psionic powergamer.

>>16686766
D&D, I worked a deal for some extra feats and took it as a flaw. Got cut by some peon that was eating an apple, body was lost during a tactical withdrawl and DM dickery

Bump

>>16686628

tell you what. I will do just that. When I get about a hundred of them I will post them. Probably will be a week or two though.

>>16687886
ALL HAIL THE QUANTUM LICH!

>>16687886
God's speed, good sir.

>Day 473: Attempted to eat my own feet. Managed to bite off one toes before realizing I should probably stop.

Trapped in a room with some kind of magic life sapping gas. It would accumulate tallies based on movement and then at some unknown trigger unload the tallies worth of damage on us. We tried via trial and error to figure out what the trigger was and in the process sheathing my sword killed me.

My characters don't die, because that would be lame, and my characters are not lame.

>>16688965
>Day 3547: Still mourning over lost toe. Writing a mental book about grief feels when you're stuck in an empty room for years after trying to eat your feet. Thinking of calling it "I have no toe and I must walk".

best death was a failed roll to keep my balance and thus turning my self into a bubbling pile of goo when i dropped my vial on self...kicker was it sank the boat thus killing the other passengers some 470ish people...

Glad I managed to find this thread after reading it on sup/tg/.

I died eating a piece of pie.

It was a one-shot commoner game where we lived in an idealized Communist society...that got sacked by zergs. We were told by the ghost of Stalin to go underground and bring back food for the survivors. Long story short, pie on a pedestal. I take a piece to test for poisons and what-nots. It's poisoned, but I make my save like a boss (high Con for incarnum feats).

The old gods reawaken, seeing the first truly selfish act in generations, and use their renewed power to beam me up and make me an exarch. Party immediately tries to kill me before ascension due to my betrayal of Communist manifesto. "Bard" plays Freebird to make our chickens set themselves on fire and suicide rush me, but to no avail.

Then the chicken-riding MacFeegle critically charges through my chest for over 60 damage (easily triple my max life).

The old gods are saddened by the loss of their one "worshipper" and end up drowning the world with their bloody tears.

All because I ate a piece of pie.

I have no related input, but I want to thank you OP for posting that link.

> 2010: Jimi Heselden, owner of the Segway motorized scooter company, was killed when he accidentally drove off a cliff on a Segway at his estate and drowned in the River Wharfe.[205]

>>16690139
Wait, how does serving as a poison taste tester count as a selfish act?

>>16690647
I think he meant selfless.

Either that or the Gods thought he was trying to eat the pie all to himself.

One barbarian on the party had this mangy dog called "Dog". One day the dog dies and to honor his best friend, the barbarian went into a berserker rage and raped all the female dogs of the village, killing then in the process. My character was at the moment transformed on a dog by a magical accident.

My very first dnd character died during character creation.

I chose kobold and rolled 3 ones for strength.

Since then I've got a habit of having my characters brought into the -hp range by the first attack targeted against them.

>>16684183
Being on fire, then falling into a pit of poisoned stakes, climbing out, only to fall into another pit of poisoned stakes (while still on fire), putting the fire out to only get set on fire again and then to fall into another pit of poisoned stakes and die.

NO ONE ELSE IN THAT ENCOUNTER WAS WOUNDED. we wasted all our healing on me and i still wasted it, i could not make a save, to save my life.

Forever Ulric the bumbling paladin will be remembered for his ability to find pit traps.

Bump.

My Commisar Yarrick dying to three fucking slugga boys. The guy i was playing with had some really fortunate rolls and managed to save a single one of them. No problem, he'll get up next turn with 1 wound. it's Yarrick.

Fail that roll. FUCK.

Pic related, it's that smug guy's face before he proceeded to nearly get kicked out of the store by yelling "WAAAAAAAAGH"

TPS. Total Party Suicide.

Seriously, the game was so GRIMDARK and depressing that at one point, the entire party killed itself.