First, from last thread:
>Oh, I thought we were going to be force-feeding pomegranates to Hades. <_< >_> Quite silly in retrospect.

Stop getting dangerously close to my ideas.
Also, I totally misunderstood what you were saying when I replied to the first post about this, sorry about that.

So, is there anything you wish to do before the first snows?

Also, questions/discussion general while I write the starting material.

The first snow has fallen...and it's sudden. A foot of it. Your vines are laden down with it, your dogs are sleeping inside and shivering, and your nymphs have vanished. Dionysus should be here momentarily.

Anything you want to get done first?

Also, previous threads here:
http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=WoodsQuest

>>16468940
Our nymphs are gone? Shame...
I guess we should prepare a warm alcoholic beverage for when Dio arrives?

Fine, I'll just go autonomous and writefag until people show up...

Dionysus contacts you quickly, and summons you to his side. The other invaders, with their head clerics (Sylvia is accompanying Artemis after all), are all present. Hephaestus is conversing quietly with a man who is not at all crippled...he has a priestly face, but a build like a blacksmith.

>>16469031
You do so. it is appreciated. And then:
>>16469084

Dionysus goes over the basic rules:

"Stick together. Don't trust anything you see. Don't talk to any of the spirits...especially not if you think you recognize them. You're probably wrong anyways, and just...don't. Don't do it. Don't eat anything, don't bring anything to eat, AT ALL. Don't talk a lot more than necessary except via telepathy, don't talk loudly at all except to warn the group about something. Got it? Hephaestus, we ready?"

"Ready and waiting."

>>16469084
Huh, so Artemis listened to us after all? Let's better not make a big deal out of it for now though. Silently nod to Sylvia, we're happy to see her after all, in spite of where we're going.
Silently ask Dio:
"Alright... so what happens now?"

>>16469155
Is drinking also forbidden? Just to be clear... we do drink a lot after all.

>>16469226
Yes. Sorry. Just a safety precaution, a ghost might have slipped a pomegranate seed in, lol

>>16469175
"Now? This is where we would pray to our gods, if we were mortals. This is where we get ready to rumble, Ogg."

Also, with regards to Sylvia...ROLL A D20. ROLL A D20 DIRECTLY. DO NOT PASS GO, DO NOT COLLECT $200.

Hephaestus turns towards the group with a smile, and speaks in a gentle tone:
"And now, friends, I am sure a few of you remember Talos, my metal child..."

A few of the gods look a little like "oh god wat".

"Well, I've made something along those lines to get us into the darker realms...my cleric will be starting the show in just a moment. I am afraid you will have to speak to me through him for advice once we descend...I will be rendered mute, for the time being."

Suddenly, two truly colossal...well, colossi...stride up, shaking the ground.

"So much for stealth." You hear a cleric mutter behind you.

These colossi are something rather special, about ten times as big as those at Rome, and they tear a giant hole in the earth in short order, and in a terrifying fashion. They have now disappeared in their own hole, and the party moves forward to follow. You feel empowered by your proximity to a battle-ready Dionysus; you may freely use all of the wine spells you know, and up to 3rd level divine spells, so long as they are on the 3.5 cleric lists. Unlimited usage btw, but may be blocked by gods, special underworld effects, or THE PLOT DERP

rolled 2 = 2

>>16469265
Rollan'!
Also be all psyched up about the upcoming adventure, and let a battle hymn play in our head.

>>16469322
I should stop rollan'...

>>16469322
Oh shiiiiit.
She glares at you accusingly, and you can tell she's been crying constantly for at least a week.

Battle Hymn:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zs4zd9vEi7g
If you don't like that one I can find you another one. Just seemed appropriate with you going into the realm of death to fight the god of death.

>>16469377
Hmm, this studio version is a little less frenetic and badass than the live version from Maiden England (at Birmingham). Still decent though.

Anyways, you descend into darkness. Hephaestus is hobbling along behind, helped by his cleric as he descends the rough terrain of the tunnel. After what seems like hours, you arrive where the ultra-colossi are waiting, quiet and silent. Below them is a gaping, hollow fissure into darkness.

>>16469377
Have an apologetic look on our face when we see how she looks... but for now, there's no way we can take care of that.

And I don't like the hymn, as it's not available in my country. It's okay though, nothing really ever is on Youtube, we have HORRIBLE copyright laws.

Maybe I'll find it somewhere else.

Oh, also we descend down into the darkness together with the gods, I suppose.

>>16469423
Look contemplatively into the darkness. We have unlimited spells, right? Maybe better cast detect... undead? So we won't get any surprises.

>>16469458
Which country? I'm USA, so only had it happen a few times, and by uploader's choice. You can easily find it on a torrent site anyways, and unless you're in Iran, I'm sure you can find a way to get to a torrent site. Also, even in Iran there's Haystack for the lulz.

Okay, so I know I'm just writefagging right now, but bear with me because this will be cool.

Hephaestus' cleric goes up to each of the colossi and taps a certain pattern on each with his fist. Their chests open up, and steel boxes analogous to hearts fall out. He opens each box and takes out the equivalent of half of a mech from each. He then puts them on Hephaestus, or to be more accurate, helps Hephaestus climb into them. For a moment the metal glows brightly before Hephaestus changes something, and it becomes nearly invisible.

"Ichor-forged steel." he explains modestly. "Many magical qualities, including light and sound manipulation. Some of it innate but untamed, some introduced in forging."

Thor whistles softly.
"Make me a battle-boar out of that, smith, and I will give you whatever you wish for, no matter how long it takes me to procure the payment. And for now, follow me. I know Zeus would be here if he could, so let me lead in his place."
Thor and Hephaestus leap into the fissure, followed by everyone else, the clerics employing various magic to not fall and die. Your turn!

Also more music, not very original but possibly not restricted:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pOZPX1iGvz0

Ichor, by the way, is the blood of the gods. The version I heard said it's some sort of divine liquor.
(And yes this means Dionysus could secretly be the Chosen One because he has the blood-power, lol)

>>16469560
You cast Detect Undead. Nothing.

Well? How you gonna get down there with no broken bones?

>>16469566
Using flight of the wine god, we gracefully follow them with our vine-wings, still looking around for anything that may attack us.

>>16469668
Huzzah! Nothing.

You all move forward over very dimly-lit terrain (the glow seems to come from the air itself), until at last the ominous and very, very dark river Styx comes into view. There he is the blind ferryman, Charon...he looks...grisly. He feels kind of like a dream you once had after seeing a rotting bear corpse while out hunting.

>>16469566
I'm from Germany, and most songs can be found on other sites, but on youtube, around 80% of the original versions of pop songs are blocked. Live versions and such are generally fine though.

And the Led Zeppelin video you just posted works too.

>>16469688
The gods wanted to bribe him, as I recall, so I guess we just wait for them to make their move. Look over to Sylvia again, how is she looking? Glaring at us? Or concentrating on the situation at hand?

>>16469691
First one was Iron Maiden - Die With Your Boots On.

>>16469725
"You are not among the dead, my friends." he rasps.

Dionysus produces (out of, like, nowhere) a huge bag of gold coins.
"Be deaf as well, old man."

"Very well. But the boat is small, and there is no other way, so you must go one at a time with me."

Xephos goes first because he can stealth like a boss.

Sylvia seems even a little bit more miserable than everyone else is right now, but isn't looking at you.

>>16469757
You go last because you're the weakest caster and because I want you to freak out while you row around with Charon alone. Care to ask him anything to pass the time?

>>16469783
Uh, sure. What happens if one dies down here? Do I go to Detroit?
Also, can he tell me about what lies ahead? Apart from that, I guess we'll just ask how life is as a ferryman and stuff.

>>16469783
So uh... what do you do with all the money you get being a ferrymen for the dead? I imagine such a job doesn't give you much vacation time.

>>16469828
He laughs.
"Just saves me a trip, is all."

>>16469822
"Even a place as grim as this one has its own diversions. Speaking of gold, I seem to have lost my way...perhaps if you could provide a bit more, I could concentrate properly on placing you safely on the other side."

>>16469881
"I do not think I brought any gold with me, unfortunately... [did we?] perhaps I can offer you some wine?"
What exactly is it about this river that keeps us from crossing it without him, anyway?

>>16468804
ZEUS!

>>16469881
Seriously though what do you do with all that gold?

>>16469947
You in fact have no gold. He takes mercy on you and gets you across. He's probably scared of what Dionysus would do to him anyways.

And it's magic, ain't gotta 'splain shit. Even floaty souls had to take the boat, which is why family members placed coins on their eyes and under their tongues.

You get across...you are now all in the underworld, land of the dead.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HH3_ZQNP9VE
(If you can't watch it, it's Refraktion by Black Fang. It's dubstep, but you should give it a listen even if you dislike dubstep in general.)

>>16469991
Look around. What do we see? Any dead greeting us? What is the terrain like?
Also see what the others do.

>>16470052
Lots of dead greeting you. Mostly recently departed, begging for news of their loved ones or for you to take them with you, or help them escape.

>>16470081
Nothing we can really do about them, I guess we should just press on. If they hinder us a lot, we might cast hide from undead (are they undead? or just dead?) or obscuring mist or something. But let's see what the gods do first.

>>16470154
(According to D&D they're undead with the incorporeal subtype)

You press on, heeding Dionysus' warnings.
Your party is attracting a LOT of ghosts, because otherwise they'd just be floating around weeping. Stealth is definitely out. You make good time, but it feels like you've been walking for two days in normal world time when you finally call a halt. You are close now...

(be back in a few minutes, you should be thinking of some fightin' plans, relative to both your strength and the group's)

(Back. Ready?)

>>16470311
Sure. I guess if we have the time, when we're close, we cast some defensive buffs on ourselves or something, if we know when we're gonna fight. Like bear's endurance or something.

The landscape is much, much brighter, as if the air itself is about to catch flame. You find yourself looking down a long pit at a great beast below. Cerberus, the three headed guard dog of Hades' throne room. He is truly massive, nearly the size of a normal colossus. It seems he has already noticed your party. Weapons are out...Xephos just preparing himself, Apollo with a great shining spear, Artemis with her bow, Hephaestus with a glorious mech suit forged partly from his own blood, Pan with...a flute, strangely, and Aphrodite with a bow of her own. Their clerics are similarly outfitted. Dionysus forms a mighty whip of thorned vines in each hand. You are left with your empty jar and your magic.

>>16470340
The landscape is much, much brighter, as if the air itself is about to catch flame. You find yourself looking down a long pit at a great beast below. Cerberus, the three headed guard dog of Hades' throne room. He is truly massive, nearly the size of a normal colossus. It seems he has already noticed your party. Weapons are out...Xephos just preparing himself, Apollo with a great shining spear, Artemis with her bow, Hephaestus with a glorious mech suit forged partly from his own blood, Pan with...a flute, strangely, and Aphrodite with a bow of her own. Their clerics are similarly outfitted. Dionysus forms a mighty whip of thorned vines in each hand. You are left with your empty jar and your magic.

You cast Bear's Endurance as you follow them down.

Obviously we must attempt to get the Cerberus drunk with endless wine.

>>16470375
We didn't even bring our bow?
Alright, summon a hippogriff to attack the dog, then blindness/deafness if it works, and flight of the wine god on ourselves. Those spells should take long enough for now.

>>16470413
That, too.

>>16470468
Oh, your bow, too.
Sorry for slow post but goddamnit sys.4chan.org!
You summon the hippogriff, cast blindness and deafness, and give yourself wings.

The blindness/deafness only affects one head, but that in itself certainly helps the gods battling it. Finally in a non-crippled form, Hephaestus is tirelessly beating the shit out of it.

>>16470521
Alright. We fly/jump either close to the blind head, or on top of it, whichever is easier. Then, we create fountains of wine right inside its mouth, and try to force it down by closing its mouth using vines.

Ugh. My net is really on the way down, usually it's not this bad this early on. I may have to call it a night here. Sorry everyone...

>>16470604
It's alright dude, have to get up kinda early tomorrow anyway, also things were a bit slow today with other posters... maybe more introduction next time? Might attract some more players, hopefully.

Hey guys, sorry to interrupt this bit, but my browser keeps blocking me from starting threads.

I want to run a skype adventure, add me if you are interested

Liquid_breaker

I got a few hours to burn, don't worry about replying, just go ahead and add

Enjoy your wood quest or what have you

Oh. I just noticed something while re-reading the earlier threads.

First we get the Wine.

Then we get the Women.

Then we get the Song.

In short, haven't read thread yet, but, as a new short term goal (we need a life beyond getting Apollo trapped in drag in the underworld), I propose we secure a source of music up in this for when we need it.