Then, there is the Lands of /tg/; a small nation, on the very edge of civilization; the people here are hardy and inventive, but are often divided by things that outsiders see as trivial or foolish. Despite their shortcomings, they have the potential to be much greater... And you will see to it that it is achieved.


You have recently gained the title of Lord, and the control of the smallest territory in the Lands of /tg/. Nevertheless, you will achieve your goal - complete dominion over all of Forchania!

But first... What is your name? And, what is the name of your territory?

>Roll 1d100 for suggestions; highest wins. Similar Suggestions will be grouped together.
>For this instance, roll 2d100, first for your name, and second for the name of the territory.

I recruit Rhodok Sharpshooters and Nord Huscarls

gg

I'll watch this... also /fit/ or /tg/? that's a dilema.

rolled 62 = 62

Princess Salicia Valthruul
The Duchy of Ouril

We must visit /k/ and find mercenary forces to hire, to form a sturdy backbone to our personal military.

What is our current funding situation? What assets do we already hold?

rolled 21 = 21

Ser Padraig Stewirt
Duchy of Dessex

rolled 1, 53 = 54

>>15926663
Oh, whups, forgot that we need to roll twice.

>>15926633
I also forgot the second roll, but I prefer Dessex, so not re-rolling.

I'll give it another couple of minutes for more players, otherwise, going with Salicia Valthruul of Dessex.

Explanation requested, are we the leader of the lands of /tg/?

>>15926840
>You have recently gained the title of Lord, and the control of the smallest territory in the Lands of /tg/. Nevertheless, you will achieve your goal - complete dominion over all of Forchania!

You currently control a small territory on the border between /tg/ and the Wasteland of /b/. Your ultimate goal (world domination) should lead to control of /tg/, however.

rolled 46 = 46

Lord Thelonius Girth, Duke of Tumblers

rolled 72, 56 = 128

>>15926840
derp, sorry. I only skimmed the second post.
Baron Bidhill of Dessex

>>15926840
naw, we're just, like, landed nobles with a few hundred acres and a pittance of serfs - not enough to fill a keelboat, even - right, OP?

>>15926882
Not yet. You do have a decently-trained militia, which can handle the occasional /b/arbarian raid, but it is certainly not a professional force.

>>15926900
I'm guessing that magic exists in this setting, though at a fairly low level overall.

Where's /co/?
I thought we were bros /tg/?

>>15926900
and terrain? is it wasteish or rolling pastoral hills
(please be hills)

rolled 5 = 5

>>15926935
I want /tg/ to be swamplands, because swamplands. But hey, we should leave it up to OP.

rolled 24 = 24

>>15926929

We're bros with /sp/ and /ck/ and /x/ too, but dealing with the big ones might be easier to run a quest with rather than ALL the politicking that would involve every board.

>>15926869
You are Lord Bidhill of the small territory known as Dessex. The people of Dessex are poor, but proud, and have long stood their own against the rampaging /b/arbarians.

Recently, Dessex has attracted the ire of the neighboring land of Umbra. Its people are known for the skills with the darker magics; some are shapeshifters, some blood-mages, but all are powerful.

You were thrust into this situation after the previous ruler of Dessex tried to surrender, journeying to the Umbran capital under a white flag.

He returned without a head.

>>15926929
We are. But, let's be serious. You don't really want to exist in this setting, do you? Here, it's a war of all against all, with hungry lions prowling about the periphery of civilized society. Why, we might be forced to do something ghastly like betray you to our own ambitions! No, no, better that such exalted /co/mpany not take part in this unrefined sport.

>>15926967
Why did we attract the ire of Umbra?

rolled 72 = 72

I pull the Deck of Many Things card that gives me a castle and train up a militia.

rolled 23 = 23

>>15926967

We anyone who uses those foul magics HAS to be evil, so we clearly must become a nation of holy warriors to counter them.

rolled 54 = 54

>>15926991
>We

That should be "Well"

Ok, Op, could you please show us the extent of our lands?

Also what terms would we use for our troops?
Would we need to recruit ca/tg/irls to increase the numbers of our citizens?
Or would we train us some Catachan?
Or would we just tame horses to get us some cavalry going?

>Including /k/ without /an/

>>15926924
Magic exists. /tg/ utilizes it the most, and /v/ to a lesser extent. Most of the other nations do not.

>>15926929
>>15926949
You have heard of other lands across the sea, but only the master-seamen of /fit/ have ever survived the treacherous journey. Some say they are a myth.

>>15926935
>>15926947
/tg/ is similar in its geography to Scotland, England, and other European nations. Basically, generic, Tolkien-Ripoff Fantasyland (though Cadia, being the most technological advanced, looks slightly more modern).

>>15927030

See the middle section of the following:
>>15927034

Raise an army of holy warriors.
Also, mages skilled with fire-magic. If they try undead, they'll be in for it.

>>15927034
Okay, lets survey our lands for what resources we have and begin to fortify the border with Umbra.

rolled 84 = 84

>>15927034
Alert the other three lands of /tg/ that the people of Umbra no longer follow the guidelines of honorable warfare that have guided our principalities since time immemorial. That they consort with dark powers is worse news indeed. Suggest that Umbra has grown entirely too big for its britches, and will not stop its conquest at Dessex. It intends to rule over all of /tg/, even if it has to climb over all our corpses to do it. Request military assistance from Cadia, specifically, because I know that the dark powers of Umbra are an abominable to their Lord and he will be eager to stamp it out.

I lerv /k/ and /tg/

>>15926979
They are looking to expand. Dessex is the weakest link amongst their neighbors.

>>15927026
A map was posted above.

Various critters live in /tg/ (any type of Tabletop RPG creature you can think of, really), and thus, many things are used for war, and as mounts, including horses.

You will not have to worry about breeding your subjects... They tend to do that on their own.

Regardless, as the new ruler of Dessex, you face some problems:

>PROBLEMS
A) The current war with Umbra has left your defenses, especially on the border of Umbra, severely weakened.

B) The people are scared, and many are starving. Morale is low amongst the militias.

C) /b/arbarians are always troublesome, and the Blackwatch has had difficulty containing them as of late.

rolled 21 = 21

We must enforce the borders to keep those from Umbra out of our lands, in the meantime send messengers to Cadia to attempt to secure an alliance and protect our lands from Umbra. It would shed a bad light for us to attempt an attack, we must bide our time wisely.

We need cannon.
If we can't beat them with magic, we'll win with technology.

rolled 87 = 87

>>15926550

Executor Alina.
Autonomous Border Domain 34

>>15927084
Dessex is rich with lumber and durable stone, especially granite. Metal is somewhat rare, but not terribly so.

>>15927086
You have ordered messengers to be sent to the other three lands; this is a dangerous job, for the only way to reach them is to go through Umbra itself, or, almost more terrifying...

/b/.

>>15927105

Clearly we need some aid from the other /tg/ nations. We can't hope to hold off /b/arbarian raids AND skirmishes against Umbra on our own. I second >>15927086 in this case.

rolled 8 = 8

>>15927129
second roll. derp

rolled 85 = 85

>>15927127
Why the fuck am I not rolling.

rolled 63, 9 = 72

>>15927147
>>15927129
Right. proper format

>>15927105
Right, can we open the storehouses to help feed the people? If we can, do that.
Recruit more men for the Blackwatch.
If we have earth-mages, get them to fortify the borders

>>15927123
You decide to send additional messengers to Cadia, along different routes; they would be valuable allies in the days ahead, and it would be terrible for your pleas not to reach them.

You order your Labor Administrator and War Administrator to begin repairing and reinforcing the Umbran Border Defences.

>>15927129
>wat.jpg

rolled 95 = 95

>>15927164
and ROLLAN

>>15927164
>Roll 3d100, bro. It'll determine success.

rolled 23 = 23

So we have a wonderful lumber trade? Wonderful, we should train a large number of archers/scouts. Has war been declared?

rolled 21, 23 = 44

>>15927171
what, only medieval terms allowed? remember this is /tg/ ancestors. some are still playing sf...

>>15927164
and the next 2>>15927174

>>15927164
You order the storehouses to be opened. The people rejoice, but your food stockpiles begin to wane. You will need to find more sources of food.

You send out a call for able-bodied men for the Blackwatch. Most are either already there, or dealing with Umbra, but you may get a few of the younger and older citizens.

You also send a small number of Earth-Mages to reinforce the Umbra border. They are not individually powerful, but combined, they should prove sufficient.

>>15927184
You order your Labor Administrator to begin harvesting the forests; in addition, you commission the training of archers and crossbowmen.

>>15927198
sry. miss judged the type of game. I thought it was with namefagging and different players.

rolled 94 = 94

I also suggest we train Guerrilla forces to sever trade routes once war is declared.

Umbra is the White Wolf Games faction (JUST world of Darkness, thank god- if Exaltations show up, we're FUCKED)

Golarion is Pathfinder folk, seems only fair. (Will this include other 3.5 folk?)

What are Blackmoor and Cadia?

rolled 44 = 44

>>15927227

We need to cultivate more magic users to counter Umbra's forces. Preferably divine magic, since they're using powers of a less-than-holy origin. Sponsor some churches and religious orders, perhaps?

>>15927198
Unfortunately, Dessex does not posses great amounts of technology; Cadia has the monopoly of those types of goods. Your hall does have electricity and running water, but you lack the knowledge to spread this across your territory.

After several days, your Diplomatic Minister, Valarius, informs you that you have guests in the throneroom.

He says they are dwarves.

>>15927184
Training archers needs years.
We want fire power now.
We should start a patriotic, if not nationalist campaign to draft more men and / or women into our forces, then arm them with crossbows.
We need also to enforce a standardized training plan to drill them into a standing army.
To counter the increased spending we surely can send out our wisest thinkers to find new ways in agriculture and help the people up their production. Using clover as a food source for lifestock and fertilizer at the same time could help us getting the most of our ground.

>>15927251
>dorfs

WELCOME, BROTHERS!

>>15927251
YESSSSSS
GIVE THEM WHAT THEY WANT, INVITE THEM TO STAY. STRIKE THE EARTH!!!

rolled 96 = 96

>>15927251
Dwarves? We should hear them out. They might bring good news.

rolled 35 = 35

>>15927271
i'll remember eventually

>>15927244
Right on the head there, chummy.

Cadia is, essentially, Warhammer and 40k. Blackmoor is similar to Golarion, but more D&D Specific; admittedly, I wasn't sure what other settings to use, and it enforces the "Fantasy World" aesthetic.

Basically, Golarion = Higher Magic, Blacmoor = Sword and Sorcery

You mean we AREN'T Dorfs?

>>15927248
If we do this, I think we ought to give extra consideration for fertility and harvest deities, since we'll need to feel our masses in the long run, considering we've just depleted our stores. Perhaps some extra nuzzling of druids? We'll expand into /b/ and let you fuck as many goats as you want, so long as you make sure our harvests are bountiful.

Economic victory. Make nice with Golarion &etc.

Question: what's the situation of the other /tg/ provinces? SHould we send out spies to keep tabs on our neighbours?

I have searched long and hard for the /d/emons that roam Forchania. I have heard rumors about them while traveling the different cities. These /d/emons can disguise themselves as normal humans but hold immense power. I have heard stories about those who happen upon them. They are changed people. Men who encounter them are twisted into bizarre mockeries of their former selves, no longer resembling humans. Still, they at least seem to be happy in their new forms.

I must know however, are these myths true? Can any of you vouch for them?

>>15927277
You enter the throne room, and see a group of dwarves. One steps foreward, obviously the leader.

"Greetins' from the Mountainhomes, yer Lordship. We be the representatives of the Hammerfell clan, and we hear ya need some help with those Umbra Folks."

Sounds like Umbra is a land of unsavory individuals. You guys are silly to think we can beat them through force of arms. We need to cause internal strife, let the rulers cannibalize each other. Then we can assume the Umbran throne quite legitimately. We should at LEAST get an intelligence report on their political situation.

>>15927304

I don't know what romanticized stories you've been hearing, but the tales I've read make me pray to god that I never meet one alone on a dark night.

But enough of old wives' tales, we're here to plan and strategize, not play with fantasies.

>>15927286
Most of Dessex is Human. Their is a small dwarven minority, but most live in Blackmoor. You hear tales of the fair elves inhabiting Golarion, but you have yet to see one.

>>15927302
You make a mental note to attempt to foster better relations with the magic-users of Dessex; Divine and Primal, specifically.

>>15927304
This is now Canon. They are essentially Slanesh.

>>15927333
Is that in our lands?
We need their help dearly, but also their craftsmenship and ores are verywelcome.
We can pay in wood to support their tunnels.

rolled 22 = 22

>>15927304
The /d/emons are a mercurial lot. They believe in sensual pleasure as the highest goal in life, and they are keen to share that with others. If you meet one, be civil, but consent to nothing unless terms are laid out clearly before hand.

>>15927277
I second this. Bid our dwarves the audience.

>>15927333
We do indeed good sir, and many thanks for your aid in this darkest of hours. How does the mountainhome wish to help us? If its land and mining rights that you desire, take them and be welcome

>>15927333

"Welcome, dwarves of Hammerfell. Any assistance you could give would be appreciated beyond measure by the people of Dessex."

>>15927369
"Mountainhome" is a generic term for Dwarven cities; being deep underground, they are technically autonomous; you do not have jurisdiction over them. The Hammerfell Dwarves have long been allies of Dessex, and they live beneath it.

>>15927371
"Welcome to my hall, Stonelords. It is good to see trustworthy allies as of late."

The leader nods.

"Aye. You lot are not the only ones dealing with the Umbran wretches. They invaded our tunnels as well. Even our most well-placed magma floods did not deter them completely."

Surely somwhere there exists a group that culturally identifies as /co/mmunists or /x/enos...even if they do not show on national maps.

>>15927336

This is a good idea. See if we can get a few spies to run reconnaissance.

>>15927388
Indeed, our Dwarven allies are always more then welcome in our lands, so long as they remain our lands.

Care to tell us about the custom and situation in the other nations of Forchania?
I'm partly interested in how a such fragmented people like the /vp/ denizens are even capable of having a nation, a collection of city states fit them more.

>>15927417

Ha ha ha, Dwarf Fortress dorfs should make a formidable ally indeed.

It'd be great if they could help us build up some fortifications to protect against invading /b/arbarians or Umbra forces.

rolled 85 = 85

>>15927417
We have Dorf fortress under our feet? Fuck yes.

Explain to us our situation re: our food stores and the treatment of the previous lord. Explain how we feel the need to defend ourselves. Promote our idea of divine magic as our avenue of combatting Umbral forces, but also emphasize the need for intel. Sow discord: if this is WoD-based, then the werewolves & vampires will be tearing at one another, and the mages won't be all sunshine and roses either

>>15927417
Good Stonelord, what cooperation do you propose?
Trade in goods, joint military forces?
Let me hear you out.

>>15927438
>>15927388
>>15927402
"We appreciate that greatly, yer lordship... And we will certainly help however we can. But those stone-cursed Umbra bastards have killed many. We managed to seal the main tunnels, and triggered the magma traps... But we are much weaker than before."

>>15927435
You don't know much beyond rumors, but it has been said in hushed tones that the beastmasters of /vp/ are being secretly supplied by the /k/ Republic; /k/ and /v/ have never been friendly, but they have never declared open war either.

rolled 74 = 74

>>15927473
Damn captcha.

rolled 3 = 3

>>15927366
Elf Slaves, That's what!

Also lets recruit /d/emons with well thought our legalese contracts.

We need some people with max points in :
Profesion:Lawyer
Knowledge:Law
Profession:Politician
Knowledge:Trade

to draft tem so that /d/emons can not abuse them and we could have some root kit;s in them...

they will be quite interesting in infiltrating Umbra and acting as agent provocatures, saboteurs, infiltrators spy and general covert and black ops.

rolled 13 = 13

>>15927417
"Even your great magma pumps could not deter them? We will not allow you to be overrun by these Umbrian devils. Our forces, though sparse could use the experience of helping you reclaim your tunnels. Would you permit us the honor of fighting alongside you?"

rolled 87 = 87

>>15927469
We are enemies with WoD inspired?
>>15927488
We need this, then.

rolled 61, 39, 41 = 141

>>15927478
Send them to the borders of/b/ and have them fortify the borders. Recruit some into the Blackguard.
Give the others free reign if our mineral stocks and lets see what they come up with

>>15927511
also, how are our earth-mages coming along?

>>15927469
>>15927473

We have Dorf fortress under our feet? Fuck yes.
Explain to us our situation re: our food stores and the treatment of the previous lord. Explain how we feel the need to defend ourselves. Promote our idea of divine magic as our avenue of combatting Umbral forces, but also emphasize the need for intel. Sow discord: if this is WoD-based, then the werewolves & vampires will be tearing at one another, and the mages won't be all sunshine and roses either

Good Stonelord, what cooperation do you propose?
Trade in goods, joint military forces?
Let me hear you out.

"What, exactly, are the Stonelords willing to offer? I am not too proud to admit, we are in dire straits. The Umbra vermin defied the laws of proper combat and killed a peaceful representative-"

"Those filthy kobold-fuckers!" Cried the leader, oblivious to his egregious disregard of decorum.

"... Quite. We are also suffering famine, and running blind. We have no information about our enemy, or even our potential allies."

The leader nods.

"Indeed, yer lordship... Well, our larders are well supplied at the moment; seein' as you are willing to give us mining rights, we are willing to share..."

A devious glint enters his stony eyes.

"And, there are some... Alternate tunnels... that may allow us to contact the other mountainhomes across the border. I am sure they would love to know about how the bastards above them invaded sovereign dwarven territory..."

rolled 88 = 88

>>15927478
Dorfs work best when pushed and coordinated, right?
So we just send instructors and a token force of our warriors to them and have them help rebuilding and / or reclaiming.
In return, the dorfs can fortify our defenses

>>15927545
inb4 changling dorfs spies share poisoned food and suddenly plaguelands everywhere.

rolled 35 = 35

If you pledge to help us against the hated Umbrans aboveground, we will aid you as best we can in the tunnels.

>>15927511
>>15927568
You make agreements to divert some of your military resources to the Hammerfell Mountainhomes. In return, the Dwarven Representative agrees to send some of their masons to reinforce the walls of Blackwatch.

rolled 66 = 66

>>15927545
>>15927573
We can inform the other mountainhomes?
A formidable idea!
Your rights, you shall have.
But be sure to build them tunnels tall and straight. Then we can use them to move our forces,as well.

rolled 17 = 17

>>15927545

I see nothing wrong with giving them mining rights for the meantime, we certainly have no way of effectively extracting those resources ourselves right now.

We give them rights to mine on our lands in exchange for information, manpower, and assisstance with constructing fortifications.

>>15927591

"Hmm... What of the dreaded Changelings? If they have infiltrated your brethren-"

The dwarf interrupts you again; he's good at that.

"Bah! There never been a Changeling with the stones large enough to "infiltrate" a mountainhome; don't worry 'bout that, yer lordship."

rolled 16 = 16

>>15927545
We can assume our Dorf is trustworthy? That glint may have ulterior motives. I want to run a Sense Motive check, but realize DnD isn't suited for this.

poerhaps we oughn't be so open about the information? Are tehse dorfs as honorable as they'd need to be in order for us to carry through with this>? Admitting weaknes /can/ be a serious threat

We were trying to send a messenger to Cadia, but the way was blocked by Umbra and the /b/arbarians, yes? Ask the dwarves if they know of a tunnel to Cadia, so that our messenger can get to Cadia swiftly and safely.

>>15927667
i think its more
"ooooooo mineral rights"

>>15927621
"We will gladly give you access to our mineral wealth in exchange for your help... Though, if you could please make some tunnels, um..."

You struggle to think of a way to say "Tall Enough" without upsetting them. He laughs.

"Aye, Lordship, we'll make 'em tall enough for you gangly folk. You have our word."

He offers you his hand.

"To a long friendship, and a bloody fantastic war!"

rolled 43 = 43

>>15927650
Do you suppose it would be within reason to ask for a few veterans to teach our Melee forces how to properly fight? Having our forces trained like the Dwarves would be a great boon. Few can match their hand to hand prowess.

>>15927692
We should totally become magic Vietnam.

>>15927667
Dwarves aren't known for lying to friends. Dessex and the Hammerfell Mountainhome have been allies for Generations.

>>15927677
The dwarves agree, though it may require some trips above ground to reach areas that no tunels exist. Still, they will send a small, elite force.

>>15927696
The dwarves ponder for a moment, before nodding slowly.


>ANNOUNCEMENT:
I will be back shortly; when I return, we shall move on to other matters, as it would appear the Dwarven Situation is handled.

There was talk earlier of starting a standing army. Surely in our D&D world, we'd do much better finding unlikely peasants with tragic backstories, putting them in groups of 4-6, and giving them vague and uncertain goals?

It could be a great boon, or yea, even a functional part our culture to have bands of altruistic warriors roaming our borders. They can take on entire armies by themselves. Arguably, it is a form of guerrilla warfare too.

rolled 43 = 43

>>15927743
In the medium term we should try to import Cadian tech.
If they are anything like 40k Cadia, they are advanced to a point we can hardly dream of and their forces are top-notch.
Having an alliance with them is the best that can happen to us.
We just pull a Japan and copy their tech, gain their knowledge and ally with their forces.

>STORY SO FAR:

A) You are Lord Bidhill of Dessex:
- You are at war with Umbra (Umbra is the Aggressor); tried to surrender, Umbra broke the Laws of War and killed the former lord while he was under a white flag.
- Earth mages are fixing up the Umbra Border. Blackwatch (the northern border) is being reinforced.
- You have sent Messengers to the three other territories.
- You are attempting to foster better relations with local druids in exchange for their fertility magic (for crops); attempting to train more divine magic users (for use against the blood-suckers from Umbra).
- You have begun training crossbowmen.
- Rumors say that the /k/ Republic is secretley funding the /vp/ rebels. While not terribly important at present, it may help later.

B) You had an audience with some dwarves from the Hammerfell Mountainhome:
- The Hammerfell Dwarves are on the defensive; they managed to seal most entrances to tunnels that lead to - Umbra, but a few known only to them remain, which they will use to inform the Umbra Mountainhomes of the dishonorable actions of those above them.
- You agreed to give the dwarves mining rights in your territory.
- You depleted your food stores to feed your people; the dwarves have agreed to send aid.
- Dwarven guerillas were sent to Cadia, in hopes of avoiding /b/arbarians or the Umbrans.
- You agreed to divert military aid to the Dwarves; they agreed to reinforce the walls of the Blackwatch, and to train some of your melee forces.
- You learned that "Kobold-Fucker" is a common dwarven expletive.

>>15927883
It is true that wandering adventurers are common in the Lands of /tg/; however, there are precious few in Dessex; most reside in Golarion and Blackmoor.

>>15927901
The Cadians have weapons you have heard called "Firearms;" some shoot small, metal pebbles, and others, bright lances of light. Some breathe fire, as if from the throat of a dragon. The only reason they have not dominated /tg/ is due to magic, and the fact that they have lost much of their knowledge of reproducing these weapons effectively.

>>15927944
Worry not; "Adventurers" are really just small mercenary bands with better publicity. Still, they can prove useful.

Changelings were mentioned earlier, is it possible at all that we could bring some into our own employ? Spies and assassins are always useful.

rolled 90 = 90

>>15927927
Speaking of Kobolds...
Can we use them?
They surely are a suppressed kind and as long as we promise them some land in Umbra, they might do as we say.

The Dwarven envoy bids you farewell, and begins the journey back to the Mountainhome. You are currently in the throne room.

>Refer to:
>>15927927
>For things you could try to work on; other suggestions are, of course, welcome.

>TO REITERATE:
>Roll a 1d100 for suggestions; they determine likelihood of success, and the likelihood of me including them. To roll a dice, type "dice+1d100" in the email field, without the quotes.

>>15927944
Umm kinda, that said,
>>15927971
We can't have men get themselves killed for a half-pence a day, nor for a petty distinction. But we could speak to the soul in order to electrify them.
By which I mean it should be common knowledge already throught every kingdom that our princess is in a state of distress, and also a damsel.

rolled 54 = 54

>>15927971
So we shall fight with their tractors!

>>15928007
Kobolds are feral, but they are intelligent, if you stretch the term to the breaking point. It may be possible to recruit them, but they may lack the attention span to prove effective.

There is a reason many of them live amongst the /b/arbarians.

rolled 40 = 40

>>15927997
whoops. rolling for that.

rolled 72, 40 = 112

>>15927971
We even have our melee forces being trained in the Dwarven ways of fighting. We should seek out some Elven allies as well. These people from Umbra are a nasty sort and as such we can not be too prepared.

In which region of /tg/ would MtG and Yu-Gi-Oh fall in? What about other boards using /tg/ content?

>>15928024
You don't have a Princess in Dessex, nor any daughters of your own. You could, hypothetically seize a peasant girl and pretty her up a bit...

>>15928026
You aren't sure what a "tractor" is, but you like the sound of it.

rolled 47 = 47

>>15928024
By which I mean hire some mercs with promise of glory. Here's a roll.

>>15928061
Or invest in genderbending magic. We don't need more than one son, anyway.

rolled 34 = 34

>>15927927
/vp/ specializes in summoning, right? Would our druids be willing to work with this type of magic? Or would it produce problems?

I fear /k/ & /vp/ may forge an alliance to take on /v/ and divvy it into chunks. If this is so, I foresee a LOT of refugees fleeing to /tg/ Hope we can feed 'em all!

I'm curious about the changelings. On one hand, they'd be incredibly useful spies. On the other hand, changelings are typically looked down on in fantasy settings as treacherous, and our Dorf friends make it clear this may be the case here, too. If we take on changelings, will we run the risk of alienating our Dorf allies? Because, at the very least, the changelings might be suefuyl to fuck up the Umbra folk

>>15927997
>>15928037
It may be possible to recruit Changelings, but they are seldom seen outside of Umbra.

>>15928052
You have sent messengers to Golarion, where the elves reside; if they reach them, they may send aid.

>>15928056
Dessex, Golarion, and Blackmoor are most likely to use the power of M:tG or YGO. The only other land that utilizes sorcery is /v/, though it prefers firearms...

Along with tea-bagging.

>>15928061
Good lord! Do we have a son at least?

rolled 59 = 59

>>15928061
If we are to procreate it would be ideal to do so in order to secure an alliance. A political marriage is the only way to go, and until offered it bears no significance. We must first focus on our large and very dangerous foe. Perhaps we shall make time for marriage once our current plight is over.

So I'm from this really neat nation called the land of /mu/

it's an obscure country you would have never heard of it.

rolled 77 = 77

I'm curious, what power and influence does the church have in Dessex, /tg/lands, and the world as a whole? Are there Paladins or other holy orders? Clerics? Or would they be a more political force? Maybe if we're specialising in divine magic we may lead a crusade later on.

We make plans to attack Umbra with as much dwarven aid as we can muster. The sheer unexpectedness of such a move after recent events should work heavily in our favour.

>>15928107
Ah, 4chan Belgium!

>>15928107
Isn't that where the dorfs are from? It was underground at least.

rolled 18 = 18

Make sure /k/ does not learn of these Caladian firewarms, or - at least - they don't get ahold of many. . I fear /k/ for their discipline, and could see them making a bid to power easily. The people of /fit we can leave to themselves, and the folks of /vp/ if treated well, may not pose a huge threat.

I fear the crumbling of /v/, leading to an incursion of /b/arbarians from the east. /k/ gets the choice bits of /v/ civilization, and use it as a move towards imperialism. While I'm fine with /k/ allies, I don't feel comfortable over the potential loss of /tg/ culture they could pose. No idea of what a civvy is? Fine, I guess, for defense, but also prone to stagnation.

Be nice to the womenfolk, at least. We want to set a good example to our Dorf allies, plus we don't want to start falling into Umbral ways of thinking.

rolled 14 = 14

Whenever possible, organize a fleet of explorer ships to go south, looking for the fabled lost islands of /r9k/.

rolled 77 = 77

>>15928117
Those could be used to perform mass-resurrections on our fallen warriors.
This way we could save us time in training and replenishour numbers.

rolled 22 = 22

>>15928119
I'd rather sow dissent in Umbra, let the lycans, vamps & magi tear each other apart, then we mop up the rest. We have a strong defense, but don't strike until we can decisively finish the thing.

Also, fear of /b/arbarians may still be a threat.

rolled 35 = 35

>>15928168
Hells yeah. If we push hard enough, one group may even sell out their rivals to us. We might get some allies behind their borders.

rolled 68 = 68

>>15928146
Being nice to the women is mandatory, we had significant casualties.
>>15928168
We need the dorfs to dig up some silver.
That givesusan edge on those creatures of the night.
Also we should instrumentalize the humans in Umbra to fight the monsters.

>>15928088
1. The /vp/eople do not use summoning magic. They merely tame and train the native beasts. A mighty feat, considering their elemental abilities, but not magical in nature.


I fear /k/ & /vp/ may forge an alliance to take on /v/ and divvy it into chunks. If this is so, I foresee a LOT of refugees fleeing to /tg/ Hope we can feed 'em all!

2. You do not know much about the situation between /k/, /vp/, and /v/, but war is definitly a future possibility. It is a bit beyond your reach, currently.

3. The dwarves dislike magic in general, but they HATE liars. Magical Liars are even worse. However, it is likely you could persuade them to tolerate the Changelings, though, again, it would be difficult to recruit any until you have made progress within Umbra.

>>15928097
No son. You are a fairly young man, so it could happen, but you have no wife or concubines to procreate with.

>>15928117
I'm curious, what power and influence does the church have in Dessex, /tg/lands, and the world as a whole? Are there Paladins or other holy orders? Clerics? Or would they be a more political force? Maybe if we're specialising in divine magic we may lead a crusade later on.

Each nation has their own gods. Paladins and Clerics exist within the Lands of /tg/, and in /v/, to a smaller extent. Though there is no definite proof of the existence of gods, the Divine Magic Users are still able to to shove lightning up your ass. The church is very popular in Dessex and Golarion, less so in Umbra.

The Cadians worship their ancestral technology.

>>15928146
Women are generally considered equals in Dessex. It is different in other lands, especially /b/ and /v/.

>>15928161
No Rezzing.

>>15928168
/b/arbarians are always a threat.

>>15928131
>>15928133
Pshhhh Belgium and dorfs are so mainstream

>>15928211
You know that there are several rich silver deposits within your borders; you trust that the Dwarves know even more than you.

No /co/mrades? Where are our brothers?

rolled 27 = 27

>>15928214
yes, Umbra is the largest threat to us. How are our messengers doing? If we've yet to hear from them we should check on our people. Public appearances to make sure they are happy. A happy people are much less likely to want us dead. Rule through kindness not lies.

I'm fairly sure I have seen some rare magic users in some areas of /vp/, but I think those have been there since they were still part of /v/.

Your War Minister, Kahl, enters the throne room with great haste. He moves with some amount of caution; you know he has long suffered from a wound brought on in his younger years to his leg. His mind, however, remains as sharp as it always has.

"My Lord!" He bows to you, his expression turning to a grimace for a flash of a second before it is hidden behind a mask of grim determination, "I have news from the Blackwatch and the Umbra Border!"

>>15928214
right now I can't really think of anything to do beyond wait for our current initiatives to come into effect, and look for further developments.

>>15928274
>>15928267
and theeeeeere we go!

rolled 82 = 82

>>15928214
>No son.
Elf Slave, wat do.
Seriously, half elves would make great kings. They live longer. Or a dragon.
Concubines don't exclude the possibility of a political union, its easy, and we should have a couple li'l bastards running around. Monarch gotta have heirs.

>>15928251
An already subjugated culture, I guess.

rolled 1 = 1

>>15928267
"Kahl, what news do you bring?" Also once our meeting is over ask if he would suffer wearing hidden splint to make it less painful for him to walk. He is an important man and it would be best to keep ourselves in his good graces.

>>15928293
Immortal rulers tend to end badly. A lich tried to rule Blackmoor once. He know makes up the majority of the throne there.

>>15928307
The Land of /co/ may exist across the sea.

>>15928318
"Kahl, what news do you bring?"

You offer him a seat, and he accepts, a flash of relief visible on his tired face.

"The Earth Mages you sent have managed to fix up the southern border quite well. The Blackwatch was nearlly overrun, we lost many men, but then, nearlly a hundred warriors showed up out of no where; they were all either too young, or too old, but they still saved our hides..."

Then he begins to grin.

"And then, the ground collapsed on the barbarian bastards! Met up with some of the Stout folk, and they've been reinforcing the walls."

Why is the non /b/ territory mainland China?

>>15928398
"Wonderful, I believe if we are to fight this war we must do so carefully, avoid frontal assaults as much as possible. How are our scouts coming along?"

rolled 54 = 54

>>15928447
Forgot my roll

>>15928435
>Damn you! I flipped it upside down and everything! My clever ruse has been discovered, as a two-bit sham! (In all honesty, I just liked the way it looked, and it was easier to just adapt the chinese borders than make an "original" continent).

>>15928447
"Wonderful, I believe if we are to fight this war we must do so carefully, avoid frontal assaults as much as possible. How are our scouts coming along?"

"Well, sir," says Kahl, "We... have not yet heard back from them. It will still be several days before they return... if they do at all."

His expression turns dour.

Umbra has borders on /b/. If we disabled their guard, then we'd have /b/arbarians fighting for us, causing problems for our enemy. Certainly if they are the weaker target than us. Just throwing it out there as a target for guerrilla activity.

rolled 52 = 52

>>15928398
Hey guys. Guys. With no heirs, we should marry the King of /b/. We'd become the most powerful nation in the world

rolled 36 = 36

>>15928480
"I see, a truly grim prospect. What our our numbers, If we are to win this war we must manage our troops carefully."

rolled 21 = 21

There is no future! The /b/arbarians will come any day now, and when they do, all will be lost. Prepare yourselves for an age when the sky is covered in complete /b/lackness.

rolled 19 = 19

>>15928610
The /b/arbarian hordes have been held off this long, Cadia would notice their movements and work to hold off the horde for a short while at least, the /b/ hordes are numerous but retarded.

>(ANNOUNCEMENT: Archive set up; please give it some votes so it doesn't get culled!)
http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/15926550/

>>15928564
There is no "King" of /b/, just various Warlords, each more retarded than the last.

>>15928594
"I see, a truly grim prospect. What our our numbers, If we are to win this war we must manage our troops carefully."

Kahl grimaces.

"Not nearlly as numerous as I would like, my liege. We have suffered greatly from this war."

>I admit, I'm gonna be pulling more exact numbers out of my ass here; /tg/ is roughly the size of Scotland, Ireland, and England smooshed together, so I'm not sure what a reasonable estimate would be. I'm guessing a few thousand.

>>15928658
Fool I was just in the midst of my multi-dimensional fap binge!

>>15928752
>Wat.jpg

rolled 76 = 76

>>15928658
Separately, they are a problem. Together, they make up a solution. Find out what Umbra has as a defense on their /b/orders.

>>15928801
With a glint in your eye, you turn to Kahl.

"Do we have any information about the defenses the bastard Umbrans have set up along their border with the barbarians?"

The old knight grins, understanding your meaning.

"They are weaker than ours, currently; the Cadians tend to annhilate anything that appears before it gets to close to either of their borders with their lightning-legs-"

"Firearms,"

"Whatever... My Lord. Regardless, with a bit of... incentive, we may be able to kill two birds with one stone..."

He frowns.

"But how does one "persuade" a group as violent and idiotic as the denizens of /b/?"

>>15928752
seems about right

>>15928826
Could we maybe tell the nearby warlords about the riches of Umbra and point them in the right direction

captcha: 100 tedaybro

>>15928849

IT IS PROPHESIED IN THE HOLY BOOK OF GET THAT WHEN THE PROPER RESONANCE OF THE LULZ STONES REACH A STATE OF RESONANCE MYSTERIOUSLY REFERRED TO AS QUADS I SHALL AWAKEN AND WHIP MY PEOPLE IN GREAT FRENZY

>>15928943
this isn't /b/ quest, be quiet.
>>15928826
maybe send large volumes of propaganda insulting and laughing at the /b/ hordes, with Umbran seals and signiatures faked on it? If they're as stupid and reactionary as you say, that might provoke a feud.

rolled 6 = 6

>>15928826
No, allowing the /b/arbarians to do our dirty work is cowardly. Our Dwarven allies would disapprove. Instead we should cut their supply lines with guerrilla tactics. Besides allowing the /b/arbarian hordes an inch into the lands of /tg/ and they would take a mile. Slowly encroach in the enemies territory and set traps on their roads. This is not a war that will be decided by raw power.

>>15928826
No, allowing the /b/arbarians to do our dirty work is cowardly. Our Dwarven allies would disapprove. Instead we should cut their supply lines with guerrilla tactics. Besides allowing the /b/arbarian hordes an inch into the lands of /tg/ and they would take a mile. Slowly encroach in the enemies territory and set traps on their roads. This is not a war that will be decided by raw power.

rolled 42 = 42

>>15928977
why must I keep forgetting to roll.

Sorry for the double post.

rolled 35 = 35

>>15928977
/b/arbiarians probably can't read. Or at least, they have no reading comprehension. Making an opportunistic raid on a town wearing Umbran colours might prove effective. They'll eat that right up.

>>15928977
HOW ABOUT I SLAP YOUR SHIT SON AND PLACE YOU INTO THE PIT OF INANITY!

>>15928977

The problem is they might not even be fazed by an outsider's attempt to rile them. Plus, I have my doubts about reading comprehension in general. Pictures of feminine parts may be required to get any attention at all. There is also the question of whether the /b/arbarians would even recognize the seal of Umbra. They ARE known for being fairly retarded. They might not be able to make distinctions between the lands other than how they are killed.

rolled 41 = 41

>>15929008
Sir! You accuse me of cowardice and then suggest guerrilla tactics!
I say let the /b/arbarians come into Umbran lands. When all is done, the rest of /tg/ will retake it then as a unified force. They may not take Umbra, but they WILL defend it. Better, they will realize that we must merge to form one unified nation under one god emperor. Us.

>>15928931
>>15928977
You sit quietly for several moments, pondering.

"Hm... We know the barbarians love shiny things, and are not terribly intelligent-"

"That's puttin' it fookin' mildly... Sire."

"ANYWAY, we should try to act on both of these bits of knowledge..."

You snap your fingers.

"We will spread rumors of treasure beyond imagining within Umbra to the horde. And then... We will insult them."

Kahl looks at you, not understanding.

"You see, Kahl, the barbarians are a reactionary people, quick to respond with gratuitous amounts of idiocy at any percieved insult... And, if they just HAPPEN to see some posters that just HAPPEN to be from Umbra..."

Kahl grins.

"I understnad. I will have the scribes begin immediatly. What should the posters say?"

>>15929008

This is a war. Civility went out the window with our last leader's head. We are outnumbered and greatly weakened. Anything that can be done to tip the scales in our favor must be done. There is no reason we can't do what you suggested AND attempt to goad /b/ into attacking Umbra.

rolled 11 = 11

>>15929136
"Everyone is right and everyone is wrong."

rolled 67 = 67

>>15929136

>>15929169

Hmmmm....that is a good start. Needs more pictures of cocks though. For the reading impaired /b/arbarians.

>>15929169
I burst into tears laughing at this. If this doesn't win I give up.

>>15929136
"You're all furries. Die in a fire."

rolled 63 = 63

>>15929169
this

>>15929169
You think back to your days under the tutelage of your family scribe, Mathias.

"I remember... the Barbarians have a common insult. Indeed, it is one of the few things they know how to read and write."

Kahl looks at you with skepticism.

"What is it?"

----

A few minutes later, Kahl returns to the throne room.

"It is done. The messages will be delivered soon." He scrunches his brow, deep in thought.

"Also... what, exactly, is a "Faggot?"

>Allright, I'm ending it for tonight. I babysit my niece until about 4:30, so I'll start the next part around 6:00 or 7:00 (board time.)

>ARCHIVE LINK:
http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/15926550/

The best part about this /b/ plan is that Umbra need never know why they got invaded so hard. We'll be the people's heroes.

rolled 97 = 97

>>15929262
ooooh, yeah! Let the /b/ hordes rape and pillage till they get bored, then we march in and clean up the stragglers. We're not villians, we're heroes! Liberators!

>>15929260
A flying machine of some sort. Pay it no mind.

The Segmentum Vidya, the cradle of MSpaint comics. Here is /v/idya, known to antiquity as Video Games, the heart of the Empire of /v/. An Empire of a million towns, the Imperium stretches across the continent. Besieged by barbarians and monsters, attacked from within by trolls and rebels. For ten thousand months it has endured, protected by fleets of rage-ships and legions of fanatically devoted warriors. It is the forty-first year of our lord, the PS2, and there is only war.

rolled 98 = 98

>>15929985
oddly fitting.

I still say we should conquer /fit/ islands. Their god is dead and their clerics can't cast divine spells.

...why is it shaped like China?

was that by acident?

rolled 96 = 96

>>15932206
Because this is the warring boards period.