ahahahahahahahah holy fuck that's amazing OP!
Look at it this way - you're one of the only people on earth who will ever be able to claim that they threw a dead deer at someone.

>>14341046
challenge accepted

>>14341046

Aye, and apparently the stories pretty popular around here. Every so often someone will tell me it and I feel like a horrible person all over again. Course I'm always happy to tell the full story.
Kinda scared she'll find out actually. Can you charge someone for throwing a deer at you?

One of my favorites

>>14341165

Holy...fucking....balls.

Who is this "Denny" and where does he live? I need to shake his hand.

We have a weekend cottage in the country.

One summer when I was like 10 or something, a neighbor from the closest village invites me over to his house. This is a real old guy, btw. Like 70 or 80 or something.

So I go, and he takes me up to his bedroom, and shows me what he keeps under his pillow.

It's a gun.

"This world is full of Vaticanophiles, kid. They're all around me. I know they're gonna come for me one day," he says, pointing the gun out the window, "but when they do, I'm gonna be ready for them."

Then he looks at me and asks me "Are you one of them? Are you one of the Vaticanophiles?"

I shake my head. No, I'm not a Vaticanophile, you crazy old man.

"Good," he says. "Get lost."

One time, I WAS a random encounter.

I was waiting for some people to pick me up, so I sat down on a bench near an intersection in the middle of the city, took out the mask you see attached to this post, put it on, then put on a black fedora on top, and to finish off the image, I started reading H.P. Lovecraft's Call of Cthulhu.

I sat there on that bench for a good 20 minutes. The best part was when a woman with two children started walking past me, saw me, and pulled the children away and crossed the street so she'd have some cars between her and the Lovecraft reading alien.

Also people in cars took pictures of me with cellphones.

>on the way to work
>It's a shitty day drizzling rain, cold wind cloudy dark skies
>man cycles past screaming going "AAAGH AAGH AAAAGH I HATE THE FUCKING WEATHER"
>once he's past me rain stops
>warm and sunny days rest of the week

>>14341298
wow, talk about taking being protestant a tad far.

>>14341165
I've had this image, what seems like for-fucking-ever, yet I never saved the story with it.

>>14341399
I don't think he was a protestant, we don't have many of them in this country. Or even many guns, either. This isn't America, it's hard to get guns around here unless you're a member of a hunting lodge.

>>14341384
Do you happen to live in England?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rob_McKenna_(god)

>see car on side of road
>tired, on my way home from work at 11 at night, but whatever
>turns out me and like three other strangers are helping to push this car out of a ditch, plus, the 5 or so kids who were in it
>push, push, push across the road and into the parking lot
>kids look around
>"Wow, we really are in Austin!"
>one kid shakes my hand, thanks me
>just smile and say
>"Welcome to Austin!"

>my face and his face when

>>14341450
holy crap. I do live in England.

I have met the rain god, and he enjoys going cycling!

>>14341016

>>14341412
So... New age Paladin?

friend of mine met an epic old dude who had traveled the world and punched salvador dali in the face

>>14341490
Oh wow. Chaotic Good.

Chaotic Good ALL THE WAY.

This happend years ago.

>Driving home from a long day at work
>Boss was pissy, coworkers too
>God damn mist
>Can't see shit captain!
>Drive of the damn road, steep as hell
>Flying through the air in what seems like an enterinty, life flashing by like a bad comedy sitcom
>Crash
>Burn fate
>Survive the crash with minor injuries
>Shaken, tender and cursing my life I climb pack up which isn't easy considering the circumstance
>DEER OUT OF FUCKING NOWHERE!
>Survive the tumble down with a carcase across my face

>mfw I find that faggot who throw a goddamn stag at me

>taking my little cousins out for a walk
>going through a little wooded trail
>suddenly across the path in front of us a man dressed like a knight and another guy dressed like a barbarian fight with actual metal swords
>they see us
>they stop and motion us through
>walk past
>"engarde!" (they begin fighting again

>>14341609
cant decide wether reenactment or larp...

eh, dunno. the most random I've gotten was when I bought a chicken and gave it to a hobo instead of throwing him some pence.
just dropped it next to him (in a bag mind you) and kept on walking.
hope he was ok with it...
guess thats random for the hobo who is used to the odd twopence

when I was a kid I used to play in this summer baseball league. there was a heatwave going on and things were generally unpleasant. anyway, I was walking home from a game when an older gentleman jumped out at me on the street.
he took a moment collect himself, then launched into a rehearsed speech about how we should all pray to Jeezus because there's a drought going on and the Lord's fixin' to kill off all the sinners and that I should get my family to a church ASAP. I shrugged him off like "will do" and went on my way.

later that year, same friggin' guy starts hovering around the bus stops around the schools. he'd stop everyone as they got off the bus and sheepishly inquire: "Do you love Jesus?"

friend of mine sees him first and tries asking him his own question: "Do YOU love Jesus?"

the old guy stops

looks my friend dead in the eye

he starts rubbing his hands together

he licks his lips

and in the softest voice I'd ever heard, he says

"... I most certainly do!"

>>14341637
Duel, obviously

>>14341608

>>14341647
just a random...
"WHO ATE THE CAKE IN THE FRIDGE!?"
"me. why?"
"It was mine!"
"oh sorry..."
"UNACCEPTABLE! DUEL TIME!"
"I'll get my fur thong!"

for an art project me and a friend dressed in black robes and handed out pamhplets for the local cult of C'thulhu

so we were the random encounter maybe

>it's night time on campus about to meet up with friends for DnD and I'm getting hungry
>hop on bike and head out to get some snacks
>grab snacks, pay for stuff, hitch up and start biking to destination
>big ass group of black people ahead of me... taking up the whole damn sidewalk
>they don't hear me coming at all
>pass by them without issue but distinctly hear a loud gasp, shuffling of feet to get out of the way, and also this gem:
"Holy shit! Was that a bear on a bike?!"

>>14341694
made me giggle
here have a pic of bears raping dudes

This one was a few years back

>be an deer
>eating grass, admiring my stag horns, eyeing the fine-ass doe ladies across the road
>decide to cross road to get sweet deer action, it's foggy but fuck it I can't hear anything coming.
>get hit by car
>die
>laugh when some jackass drives off the road for no reason
>laugh harder when some other random asshole shows up, and throws me off the side of the road into the first guy

shit was so cash

>Be like 15
>Cleaning out the backyard
>Lift up old ass flower pot
>Rattlesnake coiled behind it
>Back the fuck up
>Run to shed
>Grab longest shovel I can find
>Poise myself to strike the thing dead
>Admire how cool as shit it looks
>Decide to spare life
>Scoop up with shovel
>Drop into bucket
>Use hoe to hook the handle
>Carry it away
>Lower it over neighbors fence. They got a big yard.
>Tell parents nothing

>>14341711
I love how it looks like the bear in the middle is crushing a dude's head between his mighty bear legs and feels this is an appropriate time to heil Hitler.

>walking around in a penis costume
>suddenly, huge swarm of elementary school children
>bunch of confused "what is that, a mushroom?" type comments
>loud gasp from the crowd
>little girl shouts "EWW! THAT REMINDS ME OF MY BROTHER!" with a southern drawl

>>14341715
whyilol.jpeg

>>14341685
That sounds like one hell of an art project. Times like this make me wonder if I shouldn't have taken Drama instead.

My story happened a few years ago. I was walking to the vending machine (only functioning one, on other side of campus unfortunately) and it had snowed heavily the previous night. I mean HEAVILY. Half a meter atleast, but classes were still on for some reason.

Anyway, i'm trudging down this path between the field and the english department (this nice, ornate brick building with lots of pillars and other bits) when a fully grown man in a black business suit with a briefcase just sits up in the field, the perfectly level snow giving way above him.

I'm serious, you would not have known this guy was there. So the guy stands up, brushes himself down, straightens his tie, and just walks off in the opposite direction without a word- still carrying his briefcase.

That's the only story I really have, i'm afraid. I never saw the man again.

>>14341608

Yeah, sorry about that. To be fair though it was hilarious

>>14341750
real life player character right there

One time, I was driving through downtown, when a young black man dressed in a denim jacket and with a full afro walked out of a comic book shop and started down the street. Something about him, the way he was dressed, or the faraway look in his eyes, inspired me. I have a full beard. I rolled down the window, and bellowed at him.

"THE TIME IS ALMOST NIGH, CHOSEN OF DESTINY! PREPARE YOURSELF, FOR SOON THE ENEMY WILL RETURN, AND THE WORLD ITSELF IS IN YOUR HANDS!"

Then I drove away and never saw him again.

>>14341750
It was Gman. He mistook you for Gordon Freeman.
(Holy shit, lambda symbol in my captcha. No joke, just now.)

this happened to me last month

>>on subway, heading downtown
>>someone's spilled a fucking take out in the middle of the subway five stations ago.
>>no damn is given, as the food still smells good and will be cleaned at the end of the sub's ride.
>>suddenly, female hispanic hobo comes in
>>she is fucking screaming her heead off
>>screams about god, protestants, basseball, how we're all going to hell and how she wants to have a dick
>>spots the take out
>>AND NOW AMIGOS, IT'S DINNER TIME
>>sits on the floor, starts eating spilt food.
>>WHY USE A FORK? IS CLOSER TO NATURE, THIS WAY!!!
>>my stop. I get out and go to class.
>>mfw everyone never dropped their poker face or acknowledged her presence.

>>14341750
Holy shit I am going to do this the next time it snows.

I have a habit ingrained from years of being the Worst Older Brother ever. Whenever my younger sisters come over (parents divorced, live with my dad), I will hide somewhere in the house, and leap out to ambush them with a boffer sword. Usually I bring a second, and throw it at them to give them a chance to defend themselves. I like to think of this as preparing them for real life.

Sometimes, when they are watching television in the living room, I will also put on my wizard hat, leap out, and remove the child-gate that keeps the dogs in the laundry room, with a shout of "SUMMON THE HELL-HOUNDS!"

>>14341838

>>Is actually the best older brother ever

>>14341838
I cannot breathe

I was sitting in a park one day, this guy walks past yelling that he needs a book criminology. I think he's a student so I help him find the library. We arrive there to find out I misheard him and that he wanted a book on daemonology, the library clerk says they don't have anything like that but he knows a wiccan/pagan paraphernalia shop in town.

The library guy was done working for the day and had nothing better to do so he says he'll show us the way. We get a bus head into town and go to this shop. They didn't have anything like that either but the owner told us a nearby bookshop did so off we go once more. Finally we reached the shop, find the book, the demon guy buys it. We head outside, he suggests we go to a bar, had many ales and the library clerk got a wenches phone number.

Not so much a random encounter as a small quest.

>>14341838
I wish my older brother was anything like you. My older brother sucks normally, but compared to you... Worst brother ever.

>>14341884
A quest is a quest, no matter how small.
And any quest becomes an adventure if you take it seriously enough.

>>14341838

This reminds me of my household a couple years ago
>Cousin comes over for the first time in a decade
>I'm sitting on the computer in the dining room
>My brother walks through the room, eyes me.
>Eye him back, reach under the desk
>He reaches under the kitchen counter
>Both pull out boffer swords
>Scream and move through the house attacking each other
>My dad comes running up from the basement
>Huge boffer battle axe
>My cousin's face

>>14341902
This is fucking glorious

Worst Older Brother here. I do the same thing to my 20-year-old little bro, who now has a kid. Sometimes, mid-conversation, I will announce "IT IS -TIME-, BROTHER!" Run upstairs. Get boffer swords. Run back downstairs, throw one to him, and continue with "DEFEND YOURSELF, BROTHEEEEEER!"

And then we duel. We have vowed to teach his baby daughter, who I have successfully nicknamed "Gubbins", the ways of the warrior. She will be the Hero of the World.

>>14341884

This is the best "gathering the party" storyline ever.

Yessss I've been waiting for one of these!

> Pile into the car with some bros
> Go "chipping" (dumpster diving at Frito Lay plant)
> Head to Meijer afterward to wash off the trash juice
> Enter men's room
> A middle-aged woman is inside
> Friend blurts out "You're in the urinal place!"
> her face when she dashes out the door, mortified

>>14341908

My cousin still tells that story before bringing people over. It got even worse when we upgraded to Nerf guns, and my dad bought this sucker:

>>14341929
I am making it my solemn vow to do this with my friends whenever they visit if I ever start a family

I spent a summer in Hong Kong, which produced a couple good ones.

Once I was walking back from the arcade in some delicious WET SEASON DOWNPOUR, which I didn't mind since I'd just been playing DDR. So I come to Tsim Sha Tsui and there's this tout, there are always touts in HK, people paid to hand out fliers and shit, and she's standing there in the rain, holding her stack of papers over her head, obviously miserable because she NEEDS to hand out all these fliers because her boss is watching her so she can't leave.
WAT DO.
(I went to a shop, bought an umbrella, and gave it to her.)

I have yet to be a random encounter, but I have plans for how I will one day do it.

I'm going to make a plague doctors mask (pic related, and a complete outfit to go with it. I'm going to make a staff with the head being that of the two serpents like the medical symbol. I'm going to get drywall stilts and make myself 8-9 feet tall.

I'm going to go walking at 3AM, and use the crosswalks whenever I hear a car coming. Stop in the middle of the road, stare at the driver for a few seconds, then continue on my way.

Statistically speaking, if I do this for long enough, I'll eventually do this to someone who had been staying up all night playing a Silent Hill game. They will literally shit themselves.

That thought alone makes my plan worth doing.

>>14341953
Another day: Went to the market at Mong Kok. Come out of the mall that the subway station's in, and see a man.

This man is wearing a cat suit, not really a whole suit, but giant furry paws and feet, a tail, and hat. He is holding a... it's like a violin in the shape of a cat. He has a bow which he's drawing across its "stomach" even though there are no strings. It's just a stuffed animal, but rigid, and he's holding it by the tail as you'd hold a violin. Meanwhile a boombox at his feet pumps out screeching kitty-esque "music," and he sings into a microphone attached to his cat hat.

Made me double-take so hard.

An Idea some friends and I hope fondly to fulfill some day:

>Halloween
>Russian friend dresses up a commissar, I dress up as soviet officer, other friends dress up as conscripts
>Find street. Institute road block.
>Demand papers from passing cars. Have me haltingly translate for my russian friend while he shouts angrily in Russian.
>when cars don't have papers, sigh, write down their licenses plate number, and wave them through.

>>14341968
doesnt count if you do it on purpose

>>14341971
u white?

No, seriously, are you white? Just asking. If so, enjoying being a whole head taller than everybody else?

>>14341998
White people are not the only race stereotypically taller than east asians, my unintentionally racist amigo.

>>14341968
Make sure to charge your cellphone for when you inevitably get run over by a panicking motorist.

Seriously bro, you're stupid.

>>14342007
My parents are from HK, but I enjoy having grorious genes that make me 6' tall. Can't see the sign over everybody else? NO PROBLEM.

Can't read the sign because it's in Chinese? Well, you're boned there. I didn't stay in Chinese school.

;__; so hard

>>14341998
Yes I am, and I'm pretty short for a white guy so it was extra strange being "the tall guy" in a sea of short Asians.

When I went to the airport to come back and saw all the white people it freaked me the fuck out. "Jesus those people are just... BIG, what's with OH GOD DEMON EYEBALLS STARING EVERYWHERE!"

>Go to Renaissance fair dressed in all black, wearing a shirt with the word 'Plague' written across it.
>Spend entire time shaking the hands of the people dressed up, watching the expressions change on their faces when they read my shirt.
>End day by shaking hands with the woman who is dressed up as the Queen.

>>14341989

Too illegal. Not clever.

>>14342059
Genius idea.
>>14342049
How do you think I feel when I look at white people/ Grey and blue eyes, fucking pale eyeballs, pasty as fuck skin (sometimes). It really is like looking at a ghost.

Or why we call you whiteys ghosts.

>>14342091
So do You People see ghosts often? Can you see into the spirit world and shit?

>>14342059
Keep an eye out for
>>14341968

FIGHT TO THE DEATH

>>14342059

I HAVE to do this at an SCA event some day.

An idea friends of mine came up with:
>Go on subway
>Dressed in full rad-bunny suit
>Holding a cooler with radiation/biohazard symbol on the side
>Occasionally peek inside, then quickly close it
>Accidentally drop it
>Scream "Nobody panic!"
>Sprint away at the next stop

>>14342127
Reminds me of the time I was in dreadful fear I'd be arrested on suspicion of terrorism in NYC.

>Get in subway train with bro to go home.
>Fairly full go to sit in a corner.
>Sit down realize it smells like someone was using the floor nearby as a toilet.
>Jump up and get away.
>Realize my prized jacket still smells.
>Remember I have some baby-powder in my pocket for some reason.
>Get it out puff it onto the part the smell stuck to.
>Realise I just sprawed a subway car with nondescript powder "Oh God now I look Like I tried to Anthrax everyone"
>My friend starts saying shit about Anthrax with lines like "You know my least favorite Thrash Metal band?" etc.

Shout at him a bit and leave quietly at our stop.

i have a knack for being the random encounter I guess...

>get done skinning a squirrel for a lab
>go chill out with some tech majors I know in another building. neglected to wash hands that are now covered in dried blood.
>Friend looks at my hands and asks why they are covered in blood.

>MFW

>>14342222
Meh, anyone with a rank in survival knows squirrel butchering stink.

>>14342222
And another time.

>Promise my teacher I'd give him a cows head.
>go out to the guy who did our cow up.
>Retrieve a head that weighs over a hundred fricking pounds.
>head back to campus, walk into academic building with a bag with two horns poking.
>Classes end and students begin the shuffle on out to go where they need to be.
>I'm standing there still with said bag at the foot the stairs.
> people ask why I have head, to which I reply for a good cause.

>>14342232
computer tech majors bro. they wouldn't have any clue

I actually had a random encounter the other day. On my way home after my night class, I was the first person on the bus. I pay, sit down, and the bus driver looks back and says "I'm bored, entertain me!"

I proceed to have a conversation with the bus driver lasting the entire ride, with him telling me not to do drugs (except weed), talking about literature, religion, sociability, etc. He ended up telling me to get out of my comfort zone (which sounds generic, but whatever).

Best bus driver ever.

>>14342007
I'm not your amigo, buddy/

>>14342059
extra points for historical accuracy and noise

This happened to a friend of mine, let's call him Erik, some years ago. I must add that Erik is half finnish

>Erik is in S.Korea working on his masters thesis and doing some space program work
>Erik has had a baad bad day at work
>Goes to the local pub/drinking den
>Sits down at the bar and orders up a beer
>Notices a couple of maffiya thugs sitting at a nearby table
>Shrugs at goes back to his drinking
>After a while six or so Triad thugs bumble in, spots the maffiya boys and starts to get aggressive
>Erik get more pissed at having his quiet drinking interrupted but does nothing
>One of the Traid thugs draws a cheap uzi-knockoff and start waving it around, threatening to shoot people
>Maffyia thugs throws some answers back at them
>Now Erik is seriously pissed off.
>He stnads up, goes up to the triad thug with the gun, swears in finnish
>As the triad dude goes WTF? Erik bust his nose and quickly takes his cheap uzi.-knockoff from him.
>Triad guys is scared shitless, runs out of there like bats out of hell as the maffya thugs retreat into a corner of the drinking den as far from Erik as possible
>Erik goes back to the bar, calmly gives the Uzi to the barman and orders up another beer, all while cursing the idiots who disturbed his drinking in finnish.

And this guys looks like he would fall over if there was a light breeze.
Never mess with a finnish guy and his drinking time.

I was going down the highway to get home one evening using my normal route, which goes right by a shipyard. I've been transversing around the same time they get off. It's a 2 lane highway that turns into a 4 lane bridge where the shipyard people get off on. I'm over in the far left lane, the shipyard merges on the right side.

As I'm going down the highway in the far left lane, there's a guy on the right lane, soon to be 2nd from the left lane. The guy in the 2nd from the left lane turns into the 3rd lane, in front of this Asian woman(which is a rarity to see here), cutting her off.

As soon as he does that the woman, she yells something in a language I didn't quite understand. As there's a free spot to turn into, I get into the 2nd lane and eventually the 3rd lane behind him. That was a big mistake.

She reaches for a metal bat. She gets into the fourth lane and starts just beating the shit out of the guy's car. First swing his window was smashed, within 3 or 4 swings he lost his side view mirror, and it just went down hill from there.

Yes, the police arrested her. She didn't have insurance either and didn't have any money, so the guy had to pay all the repairs out of pocket.

Bet that guy didn't cut anyone off anymore.

One time, a couple of friends and I were eating at IHOP (because it's fucking delicious. Fuck you) when a bizarre old lady wearing a pink cardigan sat down at our booth.

She just sat there next to my friend, kinda staring at him for a couple of minutes, before she asked quietly, "Do you know Creighton Kloxin?" That's probably not how you spell it, but who the hell cares. My friend says it's possible, since he meets a lot of people. The woman narrows her eyes wickedly and she asks if my friend was in Creighton's truck last Saturday. Now my friend knows that this is a case of mistaken identity, and denies this.

>"Well, is your name Brandon?"
My friend's name is not Brandon.
>"No. No, you're him."
Sorry, but no. Nobody named Brandon at this table.

She stands up, looking like we've just admitted to raping her entire family, and walks away. She joins a table full of rednecks.

So, we eat our meal, lay comatose for a bit (because the portions are huge. Fuck you), and get up to leave. As we're paying our bill, we each notice her speaking rapidly to the rednecks and pointing at us. We make it almost to our ride before we hear...

>HEY! You better forget you ever MET Creighton Kloxin!
Cue the Pokemon battle music!

Except, you know, we defused the situation by having my friend show the rednecks his driver's license, which in no way said Brandon. Being literate rednecks, they read it and dispersed.

Weirdest thing is: three years later, I met the Brandon in question.

My friend:
Shoulder-length black hair
Glasses
About 5' 7"
Half-asian
Kind of chunky
Full Black Goatee

Brandon:
Buzz cut
No glasses
About 6' 1"
White trash
Skinny as a stick
Cleanshaven

It would be hard to pick two guys that looked less alike.

Oh well, here is mine
>night, all alone, watching some tv
>hear a bang, as if someone closed an auto door
>look out
>see some guy standing in our parking slot in front of his running car
>he gives the hitler greeting to our garbage cans
>gets in the car, drives away
That was in Germany even.

>>14342127
This is an absolutely horrible idea, but then again I say that as someone who lives in NYC.

>>14342441
at first I was like "pff sounds like bullshit"
but I've been to finland...
just let them drink in peace and dont ask em to show you their knife

Ok, well, this one might have just been me, but this was strange as all fuck.

>Getting back to Basic Training after Christmas Exodus.
>Bus runs late, so have to take a cab on base. Cab leaves me around two miles short of my training area. No choice but the walk.
>Like 4 in the morning, walking back. Haven't slept for roughly 36 hours because of the bus rides, kind of wigging out.
>There's a guy out working on some random ass thing off to the side of the street, no idea what he's doing.
>All of a sudden, there's a fucking beaver in the middle of the road.
>Starts running towards me, sees me, starts running away, sees the other guy, and it starts freaking out.
>Guy expounds on this by kicking rocks at it and yelling, which really freaks the beaver out.
>I just keep walking.

To this day I have no fucking clue if I fucking hallucinated it or not. It was so fucking surreal when it happened, this beaver freaking out and this guy just kicking rocks at it for no reason.

>>14342091
Green eyed master-race here.

>Sitting with friends at Pizza my Heart in Santa Cruz
>Staring off into the distance cause it late im hungry and my friends were talking random crap
>Dirty dude with backpack, most likely a bum, walk by towards batroom
>He walks into my line of eye site and does a double take
>my friends are messing around trying to bounce quarters into a sobe cap
>Guy walks back from bathroom and stops at our table, trys to start up convo
>Friends engage in conversation, dude dares me to drink what he has in his bag if he pull of the quarter in the cap
>Misses he drinks the stuff we kind of ignore him dude walks off.
>Next few times i'm downtown guy finds me and tries to chat me up I am polite but try to ignore him
>A few girls from back home come to visit, tell them about the guy, He walks up to us while were down town and asks me "Yes or no"
>Respond with WTF
>Friend says No get the fuck out of here never see him again

>>14342662
I honestly have no idea what went on here, please use grammtically correct english.

>>14342715
The guy had a number of bizarre run-ins with a crazy/lonely homeless guy who wandered into the poster's line of sight and assumed he was being stared at. Said run-ins include making a bet that, if failed, he would have to drink whatever was in the homeless guy's bottle, and being asked the question "Yes, or no?".

this is the kinda thing that happenss to me/ I am the cause of all the time...but as soon as I am asked to TELL of em my mind goes blank.

I'll get back to you if i can remember...

>Walking down road with my kids.
>Pretty pissed off in general.
>See a wino throw a can into the bushes.
>"Oi. There's a rubbish bin 2 metres away from you. What the hell?"
>He crosses road looking equally pissed off.
>I roll Diplomacy natural 20.
>He rolls Diplomacy natural 20.
>Part ways with brofist.

I occasionally ask my friends if I can borrow their pants but they always have some excuse to not hand them over or just flat out said "no".

Well one day a friend agreed, I then proceeded to walk up and down the school hallways waving his pants as though they were a flag before returning them to him.


Also, I'm fond of randomly spouting the phrase "Mis pantalones son muy delicioso, y tus pantalones?"

ah I think i got one
>housemate knocks on door
>I open door slightly (paranoid habit) so all that is visible trough the crack is my eye
>ask what she wants of me
>she asks if I can do something, and look sort of weirded out by me hiding behind my door like that so I step out
>remembers that I was working on art project
>not wearing trousers
>holding big knife
>white dust all over knife, face and clothes
>her face freezes and she asks if I can clean the shower since theres an inspection coming up and everyone should contribute.
>agree
>she kinda runs away.

so remember kids, if you look like a psychotic coke-amiac with a knife...don't...clean your shower... or some other moral...uh...

bamp? this is fun to read

>parrot flies away
>one week later we find him sitting on the patio
>he is singing the mexican hat dance
>I DON'T UNDERSTAND

Well, it's not really a good encounter, but I guess I confused a guy.

>Guy asks me something in english.
>Be used to hear english and write english, but not speak english.
>Answer
>He looks confused and just stops talking to me.
>Half an hour later I realize I've answered in german.

>>14343271
Tell me it happened in a country where neither English nor German are the usual communication languages.

Not so much a random encounter as a "my choice in women is questionable, nay, terrifying", it's a fun story nonetheless.

>Working at a company that does import/export shit, negotiating contracts all day erry day
>New girl transferred in
>Few days passed, she eventually needs help getting something
>Notices painted Malifaux figs I use as desk dressing, asks if I'm a gamer
>Chatting, geek the hell out with coworker, end up planning on heading to a bar later
>Bar is a shitty little dive I go to, because the drinks are cheap and it has yet to be infested with college-age fucks who ruin my love of drinking
>Chatting, turns out she basically just immigrated from Israel, is pretty up with Jewish culture but not too spiritual
>Couple of skinheads sitting nearby apparently overhear
>Keep up with the night, learn it's apparently annoying to get gaming supplies in Israel
>Head out to car
>Skinheads follow, start threatening both of us
>I think I'm gonna need to prove my manliness on the first date by defending her
>She puts a hand out, tells me to hold on, tells the skinheads to fuck off
>One of them throws a punch
>Ten seconds later, there are two crying and bleeding skinheads on the ground after getting the living shit beaten out of them by a tiny Jewish chick
>She turns to me
>"Oh by the way, I'm ex-Mossad. Got the job at (company) through work contacts"

And that's how I met my current girlfriend.

>>14343633
Niiiice.

>>14343633
hold on to that one Anon. never let her go!

>>14343633

can we please archive this for all thats holy please?
also bump

>>14343633
Nothing wrong with your taste, bro.

>>14343633

Ihavetheweirdestboner.jpg

>>14343663

>karatist preacher

this is how I paladin

>I'm working a contract job in a tiny town in the mountains of Colorado.
>Finish a day's work, stop off in the general store to buy a six-pack.
>HUGE fucking dog walks in the door, comes up to me, and sniffs the center of my chest.
>BTW, I'm 6'3" tall. And dog didn't even have to tilt his head to sniff me at about the 5' level.
>Then the dog turns and walks back out.
>He wasn't threatening or anything. It seemed to be a, "Oh. You aren't who I'm looking for. Goodbye."-sort of thing.
>The guy behind the counter and the other two costumers act like this isn't even slightly unusual.

>>14343633
>Implying bad taste
You came here to brag, didn't you? Still, never let her go. Don't need to tell you to treat her well, tough.

>>14343633 here, just as a note, she swears that she never did any of the crazy "running around Iran sabotaging shit and killing random warlords" operations, but she's also my gaming groups' regular Shadowrun GM, and I've seen plans and action descriptions that seem like the should have come from someone who was . . . well, running around Iran, sabotaging shit and killing warlords.

I've got a few more funny stories regarding her and various semi-emasculating moments, such as the time I convinced her to go to a Shadowrun LARP with me, or how she was simultaneously banned and given 50$ of store credit for dealing with THAT GUY in the most over-the-top manner possible.

My one fear is that the ex-Mossad thing is just cover, she's really active duty, and that I'll wake up one morning with a note saying "Real mission is ready, it was fun".

>>14343741

>Working in the Green Mountain area of Wyoming.
>There are wild horse herds there.
>I'm in the middle of no-where, doing survey.
>Hear a noise. Look up.
>A small herd of mares is on nearby hill. Looking at me curiously.
>Stallion appears, gets between me and the mares. Snorts at me.
>I wave and go back to what I was doing.
>Nothing happens.
>Spend the rest of the day working that area.
>The mares keep looking me over.
>The stallion keeps warning me off.
>I don't contest the matter with him.

San Francisco is full of these random encounters. In the space of five days we saw a few great ones.

>On the trolley
>A block away, two big dalmatians on leashes
>Walking them, someone in a huge dalmatian outfit

>The entire goddamn Castro

>Waiting for the tram
>See hobo druid walking with cat familiar
>Cat stops walking, hobo continues on
>Cat leaps onto hobo's back
>Both continue as if business as usual
>mfw I realize it's a catvalier with a hobo mount

>>14343819
THESE TALES
REGALE US WITH THEM

>>14343819
>or how she was simultaneously banned and given 50$ of store credit for dealing with THAT GUY in the most over-the-top manner possible.
I demand STORYTIEM!

>>14343900
>catvalier with a hobo mount
I lolled suddenly and uncontrollably.

well there was this instance in my childhood where i saw a wild moose throw up...

>>14343984
I once crushed a wild moose's heart in my bare hands in front of it's eyes.

It was the last thing it saw before it died.

>>14343945
dose awakened cats, I tell you.

>>14343984
>>14344042
o_o
thank you both for shareing that mental images

>>14343819
You can't tell us you have more stories and not tell them gorramit!

Finding out that my GF's roommate was involved in corporate espionage of the electronic variety (data theft and the like).

I made very sure that the breakup was clean, lest she sic her introverted roomie on my personal data.

>>14344077
always happy to be of service

rolled 31 = 31

>>14344048
Dudes are badass. They have fucking druids with vow of poverty as their mount.

rolled 9 = 9

>>14344098
Well, one of my childhood friends paid a killer to kill her dad when she was 18 (and we hadn't talk to each other for, like, 8 years or so). Such is the life in the country of Russia. Glad I'm in Germany now.

>>14343904
>>14343918
All right, may as well do this. Starting off with the story of how she was banned from our LGS and give 50$ of store credit for clearing up a problem, non-greentext version.

So, we're both attending 40k night at the good ol' fashioned LGS, having been dating for about 6 months at that point. She's got her 'nids with her (holy shit ladies and 'nids, I know, right?) and I've got my terrible-yet-hilarious World Eaters. Decent crowd there; a mix of younger people learning the trade thanks to free demos to try and get younger players in, and a few of the older crowd, who remembered back in the Rogue Trader days.

Then, the local THATGUY makes his appearance. You know the type; large, black shirt barely covering the stomach, army case filled with half-painted miniatures and a lot of pointless bragging. He'd been banned from running demos for kids because he'd just beat them by lying about rules or dice rolls, and would throw a hissy fit whenever people had excessive conversions/didn't fit in with his version of the rules/messed with weird fluff or something. He could have been a decent player, too; beyond all the "I need to win at all costs!" bullshit, he was an okay gamer, but with a repellent personality.

So, he's pulled out the beginnings of a mechanized Kreig force, having at least assembled enough Kreigers for a decent 2k list, although they weren't painted. I play a game, lose hilariously but don't give a shit because it was funny (had a squad of berzerkers survive withering amounts of fire due to ungodly saves and manage to beat down his HQ), and he begins the usual trash talk.

Then, plays a game against the girlfriend, fucks up along the line, and gets tabled. He spends the first half of the game calling her a noob who should ask 'her man' for advice, and the other half saying she's a cheating whore. He gets warned for language by the store owner, but goes off, muttering revenge.

>Middle of January in NY
>Going to visit my now ex-fiance at her college
>Get into elevator at the dorm to go up to her floor
>Notice homeless dude on floor, half-asleep
>"Hey, brother, you need some help?"
>Homeless "dude" stands up
>"Holy Christ on a crutch, you're not a man!"
>It's a chick doing a "performance art piece on the plight of the homeless"
>"Oh, well, have fun with that"
>Go our separate ways

I still have no idea why the fuck she was "performing" in her dorm elevator. I will never understand artsy chicks. Hell, I'll never understand chicks.

>Walking around my small town with walking stick
>Heading to the hills for a little light-hiking
>Shortcut through an alley
>2 dogs come out from behind a dumpster and attack
>Smack one dog on the top of his head with my stick
>Dog falls to the ground. Other dog takes off.
>Sit there waiting for the other dog to get up.
>Realize I'm waiting for him to get up and cast a spell at me or some shit.
>Realize I game too much
>Worst Random Encounter Ever.

>>14344160
protip from art student: we get away with all kinds of crazy shit by claiming ints performance art
wink wink

>>14344153
Cut to a month later. Back at gaming night, playing a casual game against a kid who just started Space Wolves, and attempting to show him the glory of Khorne while the girlfriend stands around, looking for someone to play. Door jingles, and our favorite player, THAT GUY, shows up with a shit-eating grin.

He heads off to another group, meets up with a younger guy, and starts pulling out miniatures. I spare a glance to the side, and notice he's painted his Kreigers in a red-and-black scheme that looks decent from this distance.

Now, as the night goes on and I finish up with the kid, I go over to check the game with the GF. The guy is being a cunt, as usual, but that's how life works. He's normally the type to swear a lot and gets reminded by the store owner not to (kids are allowed in, and they want the place to be family-friendly), and at one point my girlfriend, upon hearing him use 'Jew' as a term to describe someone who was cautiously moving their army, requested he stop.

So, he finishes up, and then takes on someone else. Fields a different version of the first army, with a convict squad.

Every single convict has a sloppily-painted yellow triangle on the arm. In an army of black-and-red Kreigers, you can tell what he was going for. Juuuust far enough away that he could claim that he thought it was so. Upon noticing this, I turned to look at my girlfriend. As I've mentioned, she's got a wee bit of racial pride, and so I saw her smile slowly move to that brittle one people get when they're ready to bust some heads. I make to try and get her out, as we're both done for the night, but as we're leaving, the intrepid Kreig player runs up with a shit-eating smile and asks her what she thinks of the paint job.

>>14344291

AAAAAWWWWWHHH SHEEEET

>>14344291
yellow triangle?
how is that supposed to look like ye olde swastika?
or am I missing something 'ere?

>>14344344

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nazi_concentration_camp_badges

>>14344344
Jewish people had to wear a yellow star in ye olde reich.

>>14344344
It's supposed to be halfway towards the Star of David.

>>14344133
Damn.

Kind of similar story.

In college, my friend rented and apartment with this older working professional who was out on business all the time and paid for the rent in like half-year increments. the door to his room was always, always locked, the one time he left it open it was bare as fuck. positively spartan.

anyways the front door lock would catch a lot, but most of us could jimmy the deadbolt without too much trouble.

so anyways, we were supposed to meet up at his place and catch a few drinks for march madness but the friend whose place it is is stuck in traffic. my friend, we'll call him matt gets there first. I get there about ten minutes later and matt is sitting on the couch, pale as a sheet. he insists on going to the local bar to watch the games, which strikes me as odd because we got into fights with assholes there a couple times. i call the friend who rents the apt and we meet up.

>>14344291
The exact conversation, as best as I can remember it.

>I think you should strip the paint from the things, or at least stop with the convict squad bullshit. It's offensive.

>Aww, come on, not hurting anyone. You mad? My models, I can paint them how I want. Besides, it's not like I did anything wrong here.

>Seriously, I think it's a bit offensive, and I'm definitely not playing your fat ass again if you keep pulling this shit.

>You scared to lose more? You scared of my Guard? You don't freak out at the Flames of War players with Nazi tanks

>That's because they're playing a fucking wargame, not trying to piss people off. Seriously, you pull that shit out, we leave.

>Good to hear. Now I just have to make sure to play you in tournaments and pull out my Jew squad, bitch. Easy fucking win. Quit being such a pussy.

Now, the store owner saw that this dude was trying to start a fight and exploit one of the rules they have; you start shit, you're banned. We've seen a few heated arguments just die the second the owner threatened with this, and this guy was obviously angling to get her to throw a punch and get banned. After all, he thought he could take the tiny girl with his bulk.

>>14344344

sounds like you're missing your entire ww2 unit from history class.

>>14344344

So, was he, like, literally a racist and/or neo-Nazi? Or was he just a jackass out for a reaction?

>>14344362
OH! right right, I see.
...
eh, I feel that as far as offensiveness go he couldve done better. I mean, if the GUARDS are wearing the mark isnt that implying that...ech, know what? Im not gonna devote brain power to this.
go on with the story! lets hear how he got his butt kicked

rolled 3 = 3

>>14344344
>convicts
>yellow
>triangle

Well, I myself am a Jew and have some kind of a racial pride, but rather twisted, maybe because of my generally weird nature. Anyway, I was to a huge metal festival last summer, and there was a Greenpeace stand, showing information and giving off flyers and shit. They also had yellow warning triangles about stopping atom power. Well, I got two of them, turned one upside down and placed them on my shirt above each other.
I guess I was a random encounter for lots of people that day, but Wacken is full of random encounters, it's like random encounter land infused with wild magic.

>>14344291
>yellow triangle on black and red IG
>WHY YOU SO RACIST

My grandparents were fervent Nazis, so I feel qualified to say that THEY DON'T WEAR TRIANGLES.

>>14344375
matt tells us the next day that after jimmying the lock, he heard the shower running and as he had never seen into the mysterious travelling roommate's room he opened the door to the guys' bedroom. and saw a partially-disassembled scoped rifle (he later picked out the FN special when we were looking at pics) on the guy's desk.

he closed the door and crept back to the couch and pretended to have been watching tv. a couple minutes before I get there, the guy comes out of his room with a duffel bag and sees matt on the couch.

"one of adrian's friends?"

matt, too scared to talk, nods.

guy nods and walks out.

we scoured the papers for days after that.

>>14344417
Oh wait it was suggesting the IG models were Jews? Nevermind.

Sounds like your girlfriend is just a painfully stereotypical grief-driven jew broad, bro.

>>14344417
>reading comprehension check
>critical fail
You're obviously a Nazi. You seem to have done enough research.

>>14344257
I'm gonna take a wild guess and say I really don't wanna know what you're implying here. It would probably hurt my poor little mind, wouldn't it?

>>14344455
I corrected myself 2 posts later and it has been over 15 years since I saw a Star of David used in that context.

>>14344433
>convict squad
>wearing a mix of the jewish and homosexual badges for male prisioners

>>14344409
>>14344417
You two miss the point. He painted a conscript squad up with the stars, obviously meant to be representative of a penal battalion, not the normal Kriegers.

>>14344384
At this point, she fucking loses it. I stand the hell back, because I don't want to get in the way. Few kids are watching as she runs up and starts working the centerline of his body, and he folds up. He gets in a couple feeble hits, but she's going on pure rage at this point.

Pretty soon, he's on the ground, curled up. Looking down at him and punctuating each word with a kick, she yells.

> DO. NOT. DISRESPECT. MY. PEOPLE. YOU. FUCK.

She then grabs the Convict squad off the table and drops them in a bucket. Turning to the shop owner, she then blithely says:

>I just assaulted a man. Call the fucking cops, and an ambulance for him. I think I might have broken his arm. And somebody strip the paint from these abominations.

Cops come, she's picked up, spends a few nights in jail, and gets a restraining order/rather bad fine for assault and battery under provocation. She's permanently banned from the local shop for the rule, but she was also given 50$ in store credit for getting him banned due to the owner deciding that shit was the last straw in his ream of shenanigans.

Working with the owner to get the ban rescinded, as I'm still allowed there, and he understands he's provoked. And the kids still come up to me and ask when my girlfriend, who they have elevated to Sister of Battle status, is coming back.

All I've got is the tale of the Shadowrun LARP, which involves less beating people up and more "Oh god, this woman could probably kill me and I wouldn't be able to do a thing about it."

OKAY so asshole makes some 'Jewish prisoners forced to fight' IG minis to troll your GF, tries to provoke her into hitting him, and....?

>>14344517
>All I've got is the tale of the Shadowrun LARP, which involves less beating people up and more "Oh god, this woman could probably kill me and I wouldn't be able to do a thing about it."

Do proceed.

>>14344517
slowclap.jpg

>>14344517
>>girlfriend elevated to sister of battle status
I want to brofist you so hard I think i'll punch my monitor. there you go, I punced my monitor.

BROFIST!

>>14344517
No better to way to show a bigot your people are not a sub-race than to lose your shit like an animal.

>>14344517
Well, your significant other sounds like a downright dangerous and unpleasant individual.

>>14344417
LRN2 READING COMPREHENSION


Got my own random encounter
>Going to shitty technical college in Waco
>It's Halloween 2001
>Wearing Hunter Thompson costume
>Late, coming out of digital media building
>SUDDENLY guy in straight jacket being chased by lumberjack
>straight jacket guy keeps screaming "Bulldyke in a flannel! Bulldyke in a flannel"
>mfw I realize it IS a bulldyke in a flannel

>>14344517

Your girlfriend is a fucking Valkyrie, and you're dating her. Good job.

I'd ask for a picture of her, but she's much hotter in my mind right now than she could ever be in real life.

>>14344517
Can you tell me in which country you live, so I may never visit it?

>>14344517
Can we get this story screencapped?

> the kids still come up to me and ask when my girlfriend, who they have elevated to Sister of Battle status.

Sir, requesting permission to have an erection.

>>14344477
Implying? Moi?

no no, nothing of that nature. I'm just saying that if an art student spend the night in an elevator most people tend to pass it off as normal.
Or if you, by some completely reasonable and not-creepy accident, lost most of your clothing and is coloured in red paint and feathers your housemates tend to just say "art?" and you can just nod and go lock yourself in the bathroom to cry

>>14344406

I often wonder whether the percentage of Nazifags is higher among 40k players, or if they're just not as good at hiding it as non-neckbeard types.

>>14344406
Jackass out looking for a reaction. He knew it would get a rise because she'd asked him to quit using something like that.

And yes, he was basically representing the Penal Legion as "lol not quite Jews!" in front of his Glorious Kreig Master Race, looking for a reaction. I don't mind 40k guys painted in the Nazi scheme; it's a pretty cool paintjob, all things considered. But when you do that shit specifically to piss someone off? That's crossing a fucking line right there.

>>14344517
>some verbal taunting and an offensive squad of army men
>breaks an arm

...
no thanks

really, man

aren't special agents like the mossad trained to keep their shit together?

>>14344563

you and me baby ain't nothing but mammals,
so let's do it like they do on the discovery channel.

>>14344606
The Mossad are basically like the CIA's angrier, more violent brother.
Only ones who admit to doing hits.

>>14344606
They're probably also drilled into unhealthy pride of the nation they serve.

Guy calls your ethnicity barbaric?

Prove him wrong by breaking his arm.

>>14344606
probably THAT'S why she is an ex-mossad now.

All in all, good find OP. I too had my share of crazy girlfriends, and all I have for show are some irrational jealousy tales. They doesn't even have violence.

>>14344577

>a fucking Valkyrie

>Jewish

>>14344642
I see no problem with this.

It's sad that I'm not surprised there are faggots defending the Nazi.

>>14344550
>>14344563
Listen, I do not deny the anger issues. Big straining point. Then again, part of the culture she was brought up in, and the consequences of where the fuck she worked; when people want to basically kill you for what you believe in or who you're descended from, you get some pretty deep-seated shit.

>>14344603
Scripty is a damn bro, and I will hear nothing against his Finnish ass.

>>14344581
US, somewhere on the East Coast.

>>14344650
Are you implying that there are no Jews in Northern Europe?

>>14344650
there is no animosity between the norse gods and the jews.
their quarrel is with mortal men

>>14344606
Let me tell you something about military men and professionalism.

Most of it is built into the uniform. When they're not on duty, the ones with short fuses will let loose. Often faster than you'd expect because they've had to control themselves so much.

But generally, fights are a pretty common way to resolve conflict in the military. Or at least in my experience.

>Halloween about 10 years ago
>Dressed up as our favorite 8bit Theater Characters
>I am Fighter
>Don't have a prop sword, grab 5' Claymore and strap it to my back
>Come to a house with the walkway surrounded by bushes
>Guy in a wearwolf costume jumps out of the bushes roaring
>Yank sword off back, brandish
>"It's just a costume dude! Don't kill me!"

>>14344564

Also, later that evening:
>Hanging out in apartment
>Hear they're having a party at apartment office
>We're hungry as fuck and figure there'll be food there
>Walk inside with two friends in costume
>"LINE UP FOR THE COSTUME CONTEST"
>Buddy next to me wins
>Was hiding nunchucks under his coat
>Contest was judged by campus police

His pokerface was fucking epic.

>>14344651
You probably wouldn't.

>>14344664
>Scripty is a damn sis
FTFY

>>14344688
nope

>>14344606
Their also trained with an intense racial pride that would make them flip their lid and break someones arm if they talked shit.

>>14344664
Oh good, I never wanted to visit the US anyway.
I have noticed, that persons from israel usually still bear strong negative emotions for people of german descent. I am sure your girlfriend is a delightful person, but I like to avoid people with military background altogether, even more so under the previously elaborated light.

>>14344417
Nazis forced other people to wear triangles, signifying exactly what kind of "sub-human" they were.

>>14344605

I wholly agree with her reaction. I get this feeling that the only reason a lot of people are going against it? Is because if it happened in THEIR LGS, to them, they'd flip shit.
"D'ohoho i totally trolled that loser's girlfriend!" And feel good about yourself? Not so good when your racial bigotry and sharpened comedic wit end up with you in the goddamned hospital.

The best bet when you're in a social situation? DONT FUCK WITH PEOPLE. I'm 5'9'' 180 lbs, going gray around the temples, and a little bit pudgy. Not terribly threatening looking.

Former USMC Corporal. I'll wreck your shit and you won't even be aware it happened.

Mossad are bro's though. Working with them was some cool shit. They're scary fuckin people though.

>>14344688

Can you REALLY deny you wouldn't break your local That Guy's arm if you had the chance?

>>14344674
You can't say his fears where unreasonable. You where a Final Fantasy character. He was a monster that just jumped out of the bushes.

You could well enough have boffed his ass for GIL and EXP.

Only on 4chan will you find people sympathizing with a fat loser Nazi who tried and failed to troll (what he thought was) a defenseless Jewish girl with Holocaust BS.

>>14344707
Goddamnit, got beaten to it.

Loving the stories, keep it up!

>>14344735

Not saying they weren't. The moment was ruined when a second later my friend in the Black Mage costume hit his ass with a Snicker's bar and said "LIGHTNING BOLT!"

I was leaving a party once in a studenty area of town. I'm walking down the sidewalk, and up ahead there's some fratfags from another party hassling some dude outside. He moves along before I get there, and with their target gone, their attention turns to me.

Bigass drunk frat dude plops himself in the sidewalk in front of me and says, "HEY! I got somethin' to say to you?"
I stop and say, "Yes?"
He pauses. "My dick... is as big as my shoe size."
"..."
"And you tell ALL the bitches!"

Had another encounter later that night, as I was sitting in my car in the parking structure sobering up. It's a short story:

Someone peed off the next level of the structure onto my windshield.

>>14344745
havnt seen anyone sympathize with him yet. just someone pointing out their opinion that she as a professional should have been more composed

I'm just saying...

>>14344707

lady-bros is still bros, bro.

mostly because sis sounds dumb.

>>14344724
And only on 4chan will you find people who think it's all right to break the arm of everyone who annoys you.

>>14344745
As I see it, they are not really defending him, but feeling disapproval at her rather violent reaction and willingness to inflict serious injury over such a comparatively little issue.

>>14344646
Hell, that's my guess why.

As a note; I do not defend her violence. I think it makes for interesting stories, but in the end, it's not a good sign for the health of a relationship when one member beats the hell out of people for baiting her. There are other things you guys aren't considering here, though, and I'm not going into any greater details about the health of my relationship, so drop the pro/anti trolling and let this be what it is, a series of entertaining stories about a fairly crazy woman.

Finally, the Shadowrun LARP. This does NOT involve violence of an atypical sort, deal in any way with ethnicity, or deal with anything other than nerds, airsoft guns, and why you want your NPCs to be entertaining sorts.

So, long story short, a friend of mine had gotten it into his head to run a Shadowrun LARP with a bunch of people he knew. It would mostly involve a couple local airsoft groups, as that shit is amazing for random milsim shit, and he managed to secure what was basically an abandoned industrial park for the game.

After a few weeks of planning, he realized that he'd need several NPCs to give people runs, act as opposing forces, and generally fuck shit up. I was recruited, having done airsoft quite a bit, and the girlfriend reluctantly went along, not wanting to have anything to do with simulated gun violence but wanting to at least give people a bit of a fun time.

We eventually decided on dressing as a fun pair of Runners, currently on the run from Aztech for stealing some hot 'ware from 'em and hiding it. I was an elf hacker, hanging out with my gilette companion in the main meeting area, a fake bar.

>>14344725
I can't say either way because I am not a woman, I am not Jewish, and most of all - this story was made up

>>14344719
Wait, you dislike people with a military background? Why?

>>14344724
Army here: Marines are pussies.

And don't go using 88Motherfuckers as an example of the army. Those guys aren't army, they're just government workers who happen to wear uniforms.

>>14344724
I found funny that if the tale was about a man, and you took out the nazi subject, most of /tg/ would have been yelling BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD by now.

Like the time Lazerus hit his That DM with a rulebook or the guy with the Odin tatoo who smited an athesit That Guy

>>14344789

There's a reason most of you are sitting in your houses, furiously typing racial slurs and not bellowing them at every kike, nigger and spic on your street.

It's because you'll get your fucking fat-ass beaten.

>>14344745
>Defenseless Jewish girl
>Allegedly breaks the guy's arm

>>14344789

You only say that because you wish you could, and can't, thus you passive-aggressively mock those who are honest with themselves.

>ib4 "advanced intelligence"

rolled 17 = 17

>>14344664
Scripty just drew that Hitler pic, he didn't say anything racistic, did he?

>>14344767
just out of curiosity...is this from the rule 63 thread?

>>14344828
You do realize how easy it is to break an arm, right?

You don't even need strength. It's just a matter of leverage.

>>14344812
I do not dislike them on a personal basis, I am just a very cowardly man, and I have a hard time relaxing around somebody, who is not only physically superior (which they of course always are, I am easily compared to a brittle twig), but also has professional skill.

It's just a fault of mine.

>>14344517
Wish I could find a nice young lady like the one you've gotten a hold of. Sadly, I think the closest I'll get is someone who ISN'T afraid of my armament locker. And that's slim pickings where I live. You keep her happy, now, y'hear?

>>14344745

Or y'know, if you ask anyone with basic human decency.

She BROKE his arm.

She could have done more permanent damage.

Heck, she could have even killed him.

I'm pretty sure attempted murder is a bit of an over-reaction to someone mocking your people.

It's pretty much the same as telling an American that you celebrate 9/11, and them shooting you in the face.

>>14344849
Yep!

>>14344831
I've been boxing for two years, and served my stint in the army.

Violence is not cool.
No matter how EXXXXTREME you think it is.

>>14344860
this is true. I broke mine by rolling down a wee lil hill. you just need to get it JUST a little wedged and let weight do the rest
weight and...that other thingie...momentum.

>>14344860
Whatever you say, bro

>>14344838

well, he's got that painting and an entire SS uniform, but that's as far as it goes to my knowledge.

>>14344884
then riddle me this, batman.
who is that eye-petched lady?
I had to leave that thread behind due to s ahivel related ban (dont ask, I dont understand it myself)

>>14344627
>The Mossad are basically like the CIA's angrier, more violent brother.
>Only ones who admit to doing hits.
>Admit doing hits

Nope.Avi
Mossad used forged British Passports on one of their last hits. We found out. Shit hit the fan.

>>14344904
Also he's Finnish.
The Fins were unrepentant supporters of the Nazis.

>>14344883

I hope there WAS permanent damage. Not over the racism thing even.

The thing everyone is failing to grasp is that this was not JUST about the racism. This was a long time standing "Lol I think I'm funny" trolling That Guy bullshit. The guy NEEDED to be beaten down by SOMEONE. The racist squad was really only an excuse and a last straw to teach a lesson to a That Guy that sorely needed to be smacked around.

I'm just glad it was a tiny Jewish chick. Cured him of racism AND sexism in one swift snap.

>>14344886

Dude. Remember who this guy said he was.

>Former USMC Corporal

Since you've been in the service, I don't have to say anything else, do I?

Something like A MISSED CALL

>Out of my french course. Need to take a bus to U
>It's so fucking hot
>Pull out cellphone to watch time
>God damn random numbers. Clear them all
>Notice random numbers were a completely viable cellphone number
>I have no face for when I missed my chance at random encounter awesome

It's like destiny called and I flipped her the bird

>>14344849
Upside down sister: A pic of a girl (at least looked like one) turned into Sister

Left sister: A Gothic Lolita Sister. Not based on anyone. Colored pic related.

Right sister: A dude made a SoB

*) a SHOVEL related ban

grammarfixderp

>visit brother at his apartment between semesters
>sleep on his couch
>his dog sleeps on top of me
>I usually don't sleep very well at his house, couch isn't very comfortable
>still half-asleep when brother takes her out for her morning walk
>go back to sleep
>he comes back a while later, it was a pretty long walk
>hear them come in, my eyes are still closed
>suddenly "Hey Ruby! Go wake Anon up! Go on!"
>open my eyes just long enough to see 60 lb dog flying through the air
>she lands directly on my ribcage
>starts licking my face
>"Morning anon!"

Pic related. She's lucky she's cute and nice, or else she wouldn't be able to get away with half of the things she does.

>>14344914
>The Fins were unrepentant supporters of the Nazis.
...until they fought them?

It's more accurate to say the Finns were fighting the Soviet Union and accepted German help. Then they fought the Germans too. By that logic, Poland was fascist AND communist because it was fighting both sides at the same time.

>>14344800
Turnout was decent, but the decorations were rather spartan. We were supposed to be handing out hints of where the 'ware was dropped, talking, and not actually going out into the field unless we were offered ludicrous amounts of money.

One of the elements that made this interesting, however, was the hacking element. The guy running it hid a dozen USB drives with 'data' on them, and anybody who, at the beginning, took 'hacker' could play through these little Java games to decode the data. Most of these guys were the milsim nuts who just wanted to run around in cyberpunk gear blastin' their guns, so there were a total of four guys hacking at the 50ish people event, myself included.

We hung around, chattin' with a few of the cooler roleplayers. I had on a ridiculous pair of elf ears, neon clothing, a laptop, and my trusty pistol, as hackers don't get big guns. She was packing my old MP7 and a couple boffer knives, for use in no-fire zones.

Finally, a few guys heard that I might have the skinny on some good wares, and asked for the location. Upon demanding a profit before spilling the beans, one of them had the bright idea of threatening me. Girlfriend has a knife out in a second, and negotiations go a little smoother, as we get a good amount of cash for the info.

Repeat one more time, minus the threats, and two teams are heading for the 'ware, blissfully unaware that Aztech wants it pretty badly. When team #3 shows up, working for Aztech, and demanding we show it to them. Seeing no other alternative, we both head out into the playfield.

>>14344940
eyepatch made me make assumptions.
which I guess can be forgiven, eh? haha.

>>14341989
We did something similar with chem suits and gas masks one summer. After an hour, the police came by and threatened to haul us down to the station for being a nuisance/illegally blocking street. Ended up with $50 fine. Totally worth it.

>>14344828
>>14344745
>(what he thought was) a defenseless Jewish

Selective quoting is fun

>>14344934
I doubt it's the same guy.
And if he is, he can eat a dick twice as much.

Violence does not become more acceptable because you're trained for it, quite the opposite in fact.

"Everything in human history is best solved with violence. Violence is the cure all. Violence is the way we pave for peace. There is a man on my doorstep, prepared to take what I have earned, be it my possessions, my pride, or my life. He has no right to claim those things, but he comes all the same. Before he takes from me, I shall take from him. In taking from him i give back all that he would have stolen from my, my friends, my family, and my children.

In taking a life I pave the way for peace."

Lemme make this clear. People with no common decency? Should be treated as such. I hear talk of basic human decency? Things like "Keep your hands to yourself" "violence is not the answer." Since when did we become a bunch of pussies?

Last I checked you earn everything you get. Be it money, pride, a girlfriend. You did SOMETHING to earn it, even if it was just being born. And that makes it yours to give away. Some of you might not understand self-respect, and self-worth. But let me make this clear. Nothing is more important in this world than yourself. You are all you have. Be everything you can be, reach out and grab tomorrow. You are the author of your own story. Let noone take the pen from you. A man would damage your home? Crush him. Your home is your sanctuary

Damage your pride?
Punish him. Your pride is your Temple.

Damage your family?
Kill him. They are your anchor.

>>14344972
Is that a stealthy request?

>>14344947
...
I keep forgetting tone doesn't carry, and saying ridiculous things on 4chan doesn't make you stand out.

People need to learn fucking respect,pushing other people around while hiding behind "The Rules" is a load of shit.

http://www.dailymotion.com/video/xhlepn_casey-heynes-vs-bully_fun

>>14343819
I know exactly what you mean.

New girl at work had just immigrated here from Israel. There is a lot of downtime at work so my friend and I were chatting to her and getting to know her (all of us aged around the 22-24 mark). Topic came up about Israeli armed forces.
She said: "Yes, I've done my [however many years they have to do]."
"Did you ... like it?"
"It was very good. We learned a lot of skills..."
And then I felt like she could kill me in many different ways without a sound.

Pretty much this: >>14343738

>>14345003
depends. you a drawfag?

...
gad zeus, delivering that line felt strangely good...

>>14344985
but but but kicking some retard's ass is basically the same as shooting them in the face!

>>14345026
yup. A very irregular and un-delivering one. But I try my best to stop it.

>>14344985
You sound like a dangerous individual and a solution would be removal from society and genepool to keep your ideology, as well as probable sick genes responsible for such way of thinking from spreading.

I guess that means I'd take the right to spread your influence, before you take mine.
Oh, the IRONING.

Ha ha ha.

>>14344952
So, heading through things at gunpoint, we decide that it's a good idea to rush, hopefully run into one of the other runner teams that's going for the stuff.

Fortunately, we do, and they're currently arguing over who gets it. Realizing that it would be a good time to move, my girlfriend grabs me, yells, "FULL REFUND FOR WHOEVER WASTES THE AZTECH GOONS", and pulls me into cover.

One pitched firefight later, and there is one guy standing triumphantly. She hands him his money, walks away, and pulls my ass, which managed to get shot back into the runner's bar.

The rest of the weekend was spent brokering random deals, avoiding goons, and otherwise having a blast. I can post the system the guys used for it, if people want.

And for the last time; cut it with the justification arguments. I think that it's a funny story to tell. I don't think it's cool that someone's arm got broken. I admit that she has 'issues', but I love the girl anyway. The guy was pretty out of line, but then again, so was she. Did you miss the part about getting arrested, a restraining order, and paying a rather hefty fine for assault and battery? That means that, yes, this is not some magical consequence-free land of bullshit and honey.

Oh, and his arm wasn't broken. She THOUGHT it was. Just so that people are clear on that little bit.

>>14344985

I dub thee, COURAGE SPACE-WOLF

>>14344606
everyone with "Agent" in their job title is not James Bond.

>>14344812
Marine Pogues>88Motherfuckers
Army Mech>Marine Mech
Marine Leg>Big Army leg
Small Army (Ranger) leg>MEU leg
Force Recon>Seals>Rangers (seriously, SEALS are really scary in a fight, but keep shitty camp discipline, I got to be within ear shot as the Top for the some Force Recon types who were passing through got his ass chewed by his CO because some SEAL dickhead complained to him about all of the mortician business cards the Force Recon guys put in the pockets of a bunch of SEALs who were parked outside the wire, and supposed to be keeping watch and all that bullshit).
Delta>Force Recon
Parajumpers>all.

>>14345048
>/new/fag trying to claim to be the civilized one

>girlslaughing.jpg

>>14344945
D'aww. My dog's name is Ruby too.

>>14345046
well. it's five hours beyond my usual bed-time, I am depressed, in physical agony and I think I just coughed up half of my lungs, so if you wanna 63 me I have loads of time to wait.
heck, I draw too, we might do each other
...
yes i know how gay that sounds

>>14344984

No, no, my point is, you're trying to talk reason.

To a Marine.

A Marine NONCOM.

We both know that doesn't work.

>>14345077
Just applying his rule.

rolled 45 = 45

>>14345026
Slants is a damned good drawfag. I enjoyed his depiction of my humble person.

Rule 63 thread the fourth? Horray!

>>14345048

On the contrary. Obey the law. Utilize the minimum amount of force in order to ensure you survive. But I think that if someone has this great idea that the law and rules of the land allow them to act like an unrepentant fool in all regards, they should be corrected.

If someone breaks into my house? They're dead. I have children. I do not know their intentions.

Somebody talks shit to me at work? We'll have words, and if they really want to escalate it, there's a chance we may fight, if no more words can potentially be spoken to defuse it. But words are where that should generally stop. Do you talk shit to your boss and get away with it? Fuck no, you get fired. Do you tell the 7 foor tall black guy down the street he's a nigger? Fuck no, he'll cave your face in.

See where i'm going with this? Violence is an integral part of human interaction. There is always an aggressor, and an aggressee.

Choosing the correct level of response is where she was mistaken. Working him into a pulp? Probably not necesarry. An unarmed takedown and a stern word would've sufficed to make sure he understood that he was outmatched and in the wrong.

>>14345048
Someone talks shit you tech them otherwise, someone breaks into your home or harms your family you end their life.

This is a basic ideology, I share it, leave the well off near-urban areas and it's the majority.

>>14344291
>>14343633

suspiciuosly sounds like samefag jew trying to make up stories.

>>14345094

Please see

>>14344831

>>14345092
Not US brah.

Though yea... probably should have picked up on that one.

>>14344985
>You did SOMETHING to earn it, even if it was just being born.

I fucking hate people like you. This earns you _nothing_. If you -- yes, you personally -- deserve anything at all, it's to have everything you think this earned taken from you.

You are a spoiled, whining, self-centered little manchild who can't come to grips with the fact that he's not the center of the fucking universe.

There are a number of very good reasons, times, and places to use violence, but all of them are beyond your broken comprehension.

>>14345075

CIVILIAN MANLY MAN-MAN TIER: Smoke Jumpers

yes, that man is parachuting directly into a forest fire with nothing but some kevlar and a fireman's axe.

>>14345105
>>14345117

Don't worry, I'm sure if someone broke in to
>>14345048's
home and threatened his life, he'd politely ask them to leave.

>>14345128
>not US
>two years

.... oh. Mandatory service? I see.

Yeah, the... nature of the USMC is internationally infamous. Ask any Okinawan.

BAH-DUM~TISH

All right, glad people enjoyed the stories of my crazy girlfriend. I have work to do, but I wholeheartedly apologize for accidentally touching off a huge argument over whether or not that was justified, and the righteousness of the thing. Just enjoy it for what it is; a tale of THAT GUY pushing someone too far. I'm not a big fan of violence, and I willfully admit she was over the line, but how many of you can say you wouldn't want to watch the jackass mouthbreather who spends every waking moment pissing people off 'because of lulz, dur!" get chastized for it. It doesn't even have to be physical; just someone telling him off. In this case, it was, explaining why some people don't like it.

And finally, for the haters, the racists, and the people who think that this should boil down to a /new/ topic; I'm pure German, blond-haired, and blue eyed.

>>14345146

Okinawan? What are those? All i saw was a bunch of half-white people.

>>14345158

Thanks for the stories Broseph. Hopefully the thread can get back on track... though I think it's hopeless now. This is no fault of yours, or your incredibly hot girlfriend.

>>14345158
>German, blonde-haired, blue eyed
>Dating smoking hot ex-Mossad Jewish girl
>WHO IS ALSO A NERD

I AM SO FUCKING JEALOUS OF YOU I CANNOT FUCKING BREATHE

>>14345136
Being born earns you the right to breath until you do something that threatens someone else, and the right to at least be treated somewhat decently, if not actually respected as respect must be earned through action. Not too much else there, hell he seems fairly against self entitlement.

>>14345170
Precisely.

>we might do each other
>i know how gay that sounds
Sadly, I don't need help to look gay. (some friends noted that my body languague looks femenine, and the long hair doesn't help, I've been mistaken for a girl a couple of times)

Also, some girl I loathe already 63'ed me with photoshop. I look like my mother.
>my face when

>>14345136
>>14345183
The whole thing is about the fact that nobody has earned the right to take from someone unprovoked.

>>14345105
See, now you specify the factor of appropriate response, which makes your stance a little less disagreeable. Yet, some of your examples show unreasonable reactions, such as agreeing with serious injury with possible permanent disfigurement as a response to racial slurs. How such insults are taken varies greatly. I am sure you have heard of such honour killings occuring often(?) in middle eastern regions. For the perpretrator, the reasonable response to insulting the family in one way or another was a violent end.
As long as no tangible damage is done, or if violence is not applied to directly avoid such damage (self-defense), it is to be condemned.
I disagree with you, and I dearly hope people of your mindset will cease to exist at some point in time.

>>14345136
>Human rights are for entitled faggots

>>14345121
sounds suspiciously like a /new/fag who didn't bother actually reading the thread

>>14343756
Was it Crestone? It's this little town in the mountains of Colorado, and it's full of hippies, and there's no leash law or whatever, dogs just walk around. Nice little place.

>>14345211
I used to get that too when I had longer hair.
must be me inheriting these awesome hips.
awesome in the sense that they would look great on a girl...

>Riding my bike back from nearby gas-station
>Got tons of soda with me
Oh look! The crossing light is on, meaning I can cross and not get hit by a car.
>Car slams into my side, knocking me off the bike and nearly rolls onto my leg, trapping my jeans under the tire.
>Gangbanger gets out. His pants are lower than me, and I still haven't got up.
>He pulls me up and looks me dead in the eye...
>...then hugs me.
"I'M SO GLAD YOU'RE OK! MY GAWD ARE YOU I CAN'TBELIVEIHITYOUDON'TNEEDTOGOTOTHEHOSPITALWAHWAHWAH!"
>Hug him back in the middle of traffic as cars stop to watch, patting him on the back.
>He gives me all the money in his wallet, 60-odd dollars, to get a new bike tire since he trashed one of mine.
>I give him a Mtn. Dew.
>Brofist

>Later on.
"Man, that threw yer entia' bike alignment off! Gonna' take at leas' a hunn'erd ta fix it."
>FUCK!

>>14345183
>Perfectly reasonable person on /tg/...
>...Suddenly, tranq dart!

Alright, let's tag him quickly. We gotta get his feeding and social habits down.

>>14345222

In short, gentlemen; we all can agree on these points:

1. The woman's response was excessive in the eyes of the law and in light of the actual offenses.

2. It is absolutely fucking hilarious that that particular asswipe got his ass properly kicked, and it was a lesson he needed badly.

We can disapprove of the violence, yet appreciate how richly deserved it was at the same time.

>>14345146
I suppose the amount of complaints an Okinawan would have would be proportional to...
No, I'm not going there, I'm above that.

Seriously though, the amount of faggotry over the US marines, when I served at least, was like weeaboos and samurais.

>>14345222
>I disagree with you, and I dearly hope people of your mindset will cease to exist at some point in time.
Not him, but this will only happen when it stops being necessary.

>>14341473
Ok so I hate to disrupt this awesome thread but the comic from which that reaction image was taken was totally commissioned for me. I've got the print sitting on my shelf right now.

>>14345252

'Least you didn't have to pay the whole 100!

>>14345222
Are you really linking a smack-talking bully getting their shit slapped with a woman getting murdered for not submitting to slavery?

Get the fuck out everyone this thread is over.

>>14345277

IMAGE.

NAO.

>>14345222

Those are some nice big words there. I'm sure you're masturbating to them as we speak, applauding your pseudo-intelligence and advanced evolved morals. I'm sure your gigantic brain impresses all the ladies.

You can keep on with that. If someone deserves a beating for unacceptable behavior, I will give them a beating. If I deserve a beating (which I have in the past) I will accept that beating, and learn from it what my unacceptable behavior was. We learn through pain. As much as I know you'd LIKE to be 'civilized' and talk through everything, words can only get you so far. Dominance is sometimes a necessary evil. You can't beat everyone down with your gigantic evolved brain.

>>14345269
>>14345261
Who is John Galt?

>an ex-safecracker dating real life Cata-Chan who is also an automotive mechanic

>a man dating real life Sororitas who may or may not actually be an Eversor

/tg/ - full of people who's lives are more interesting than I ould ever hope for

>>14345297
A character from a bad fapfic.

>>14345279
The thread was already thoroughly derailed, from funny stories to beatdowns to ... reasonable application of violence.
I was already far away from that mossad or whatever.

Fuck you, it's past 4am, I can barely look straight, you stupid blonde yeti.

>>14345121
dat reading comprehension.

>>14345158
I only have two words for your tales: I JELLY, even if they are fictional.

>>14345247
I don't see what's girly about me other than the body language. After three years of GMing, I see how people can see you in a completely different light if you change your mannerisms. Too bad my default seems to be something between a girl and a tomboy.

That would explain the crazy girlfriends, tough.

>>14345294
Those were not big words.

>>14345321

I was too lazy to find a redneck picture. Just... assume the redneck picture is implied. It was a sarcastic impression.

>>14345279
Violance is bad M'Kay?

Some people.

>>14345317
strange...I am a Gm too...
Maybe this is some kinda social troll-science about DM's and effeminate somethingorother
4AM... cannot brain anymore

>>14345268
>Seriously though, the amount of faggotry over the US marines, when I served at least, was like weeaboos and samurais.

Fucking A. Doesn't help that they actively push it. The hilarious thing is how far the gap is between the image they push and the troops they turn out.

It's sad, because the Marines *seem* like they should be the best branch. They still do extensive bayonet training, they retained the M-16 on the theory that the Army are weak-armed faggots for switching to the M-4 (a statement which may have some merit,) and they actually mean it when they say that "every Marine is a rifleman first." There's two things that could be going on here. First, the Marines take the stupidest motherfuckers on earth in recruitment because they're confident their espirit de corps and such can beat even the worst shitbag into a reliable rifleman. Second, they're so steeped in their own legend and bravado, 24/7, that they actually start to believe that shit. You know those Corps commercials where they climb a mountain, kick a cougar in the nuts, then surf it back down the slope? They believe that shit, and it damages their brains.

Or perhaps it's BOTH. I can't be sure.

>not going there

Aaahahahaha.

Goddamnit, shut the fuck up. We just wanted to come to this thread for storytime.

Why must you moral/anti-moralfags ruin everything you touch?

>>14345348

I also have effeminate manurisms and long hair. I lucked out with a square jaw and broad shoulders though.

... I do get hit on by a lot of bi chicks though. I wonder if it could be related.

>>14345363
They started it.

>>14345348
Rule 63 thread? They're always good for a laugh.

>>14345301
A small but noticeable percentage of guys who play tabletop rpgs have very interesting lifes. Sometimes I think roleplaying is just training to them

>>14344745

>defenseless Jewish girl with Holocaust BS.

every jew mentioning the holocaust and not being there personally is just fishing for pity, its the ultimate pity card

>>14345352
I do hafta admit. The Bullshit got pretty steep when i was in. The worst Marines of all are the smart ones.

Ever met a dumb motherfucker who thought he was entitled to shit?

Ever met a SMART motherfucker who thought he was entitled to shit?

Yeah.

>>14341016

Once I encountered a guy who typed stuff like

>See a dead dear on the road.
>Fogs so think I don't even see it hit the ground

It was bizarre. A dead dear? Dear Abby? Fog that thinks? Like an air elemental?

>>14345386
>This is what /new/fags actually (claim to) believe

>>14345363
lots of bi chicks...
score. try to get em in an orgy
me, I got incredble woman hips... but also broad shoulders, a somewhat manly chin and my mothers metabolism (which is basically the only reason Im not fat). so yeah, overall pretty happy about it. shit hit the fan when everything grew in the wrong directions tho... i blame my wonky spine, which might have been affected by a severe neck injury.
thats a wall of text, imma go eat a handful of pills and sleep now

>>14345371
Not a surprise my fellow. Most drawfags have a vein of storyteller (not a surprise most of them wants to write comics or shit). Multiclassing as drawfag/GM is not unusual.

>>14345348
Let me get my robe and my drawfag hat. I would like to have another thread in order to stop ruining this one, but I think this thread is beyond hope, isn't it?

>>14345396

AAAAHAHAHAHA oh god. Oh god, that DOES sound bad.

It's funny how far back this goes. Army grunts used to say that the most dangerous place to be on Iwo Jima was between a Marine and a camera. So it goes back a good 60 years, at the least.

Well, at least the Marines aren't required to cover themselves in five fucking reflective safety belts.

>>14345371
lets make one tomorrow
...er... later today...
sleep now

I love how most jews and murricans spews idology and ideas thats EXACTLY taken from nazism.

Hell, you could go around and quote for Mein Kampf and 99 out of 100 people will wholeheartedly agree with you.

Nazis are just the most convenient scapegoat of the 20th century, you can project ANYTHING bad to them and if you try to argue anything you are EVIL because nazis are EVIL. Its the perfect thought-terminating fallacy.

>>14345421
But a different thread will last longer, and won't annoy the few legit posters left...

>>14345433
okay brosef, rest well. I have still very delayed requests to finish tough.

An encounter from my time spent aboard.

>Off in Japan with my parents instead of winter quarter
>Viking in the land of the rising sun, strange looks everywhere. A couple people take pictures too.
>Take trains everywhere.
>Elderly japanese man on train sits down next to me.
>Strikes up a conversation, saying his hair used to be as long as mine, which reaches to the middle of my back.
>Says he also was in a rock band in California.
>He even provided pics, to prove it happened.
>We end up discussing the various types of rock music out there, and which generation had the best.
>Spend entire train ride talking about music, until we got to the end of the line.
>Hit up little curry joint on the train platform with old dude, he treats me to a good meal.

Some naval shipyard worker made a damn international incident. Drunk fucker tried to kick down some poor family's door, cause he was so drunk he thought he was back in the states, which lead to this.

>Off wandering the suburbs around my apartment complex
>Encounter three young men, my age or a little more.
>They start yelling at me to go home, how we weren't wanted, and various profanties, in broken english.
>Just stare, slightly perplexed.
>Largest of them, who came to about my chin, walks up.
>He heel stomps me in the arch of my foot.
>Hurts like a bitch, but not enough to care.
>Start snickering, then chuckling, then full belly laugh.
>Assume boxer stance.
>"Well, shall we?"
>They see the error of their ways, and run.
>Report incident to parents.
>A week later after I get naval base access, I am introduced to my parents' boss
>Get congratulated for not causing a scene.

And that is why I have put some many points into intimidate.

>>14345421

Yep. Well, it was fun. Time to go play some Arcanum then pass out.

>>14345418

Believe it or not, orgies with all-women get tiring really fast. And when was the last time you met a girl who DIDN'T claim to be bi? It's really not relevant, just a funny thought.
Sleep well my handsome hobo.

>>14345405

Fuck. I was hoping nobody would notice

>>14345459
>orgies get tiresome
mfw

heh. yeah goodnight chaps. drawfagging tomorr- later

>>14345284
Shitty lighting is proof.

>>14345386

If they're going BAAAW POOR ME, then yes. But it doesn't take much to want to kick a skinheads ass, trust me. There's something about those fuckers that radiates disease. They're shit-eating assholes, which is what makes you want to gut them. Being anti-semites is just the particular vent they adopted for their inner asshole.

>>14345430
See, I hear you people complaining about flashiness.
I was a Medic, and wore green in a desert.
My country cannot into war.

So, there was this one time, me and my buddy were waiting for the bus, when all of a sudden this old dude walks up behind us, drops a walnut on the ground and says to us "Step on it, and if you don't laugh, I'll cry." After a few moments of confusion and paranoia, I finally step on it, half expecting it to be full of rusty needles, angry bees, and fire. As I move my foot away, I see it's a condom inside the walnut. We laugh, and before I could look up or say anything else, the guy disappears into copse of a couple trees behind the bus stop. Me and my buddy maintain to this day that we encountered a tree-wizard of some sort. We never saw him again.

>>14345547
tried to cast hideous laughter

>>14345570
isnt that drawfag up there a one-eyed reenactor too?

>>14345568
In addition, he made it a point to note that the hot pink condom which by some devilry had been sealed within a walnut "Hasn't been used, and it can't be used."

>>14345489
Actual skinheads and skinhead culture has nothing to do with anti-semitism or any other kind of racism at all. Fucking neo-Nazis hijacking shit.

Okay I'm an art major so this shit happens a lot. The first one that springs to mind is when I got into an elevator and there's a giant working costume of No-Face from Spirited Away.

"Hey." I say.
"Uh." It says.

The rest of the ride was complete silence.

As for being someone's random encounter, well a year ago I had a project where I would put up posters all over campus that said someone's name and then a positive message like "Sarah- Kick some ass today." I put up more late night every week so nobody would see me and the posters started to get some notoriety. A lot of people loved them while the local police called it visualization. So I got a mask and a grey sweatshirt and wore them while I put up the posters. I'd hang them in hard to reach places, climb on buildings to put them up and so on.

Once I was hiding from the campus police who were looking for me and when the coast was clear I jumped out from my ledge and landed in front of a couple sorority girls. After an awkward pause I gave them a couple of the flyers to give out to people that share the name on each one.

>>14345158
Dude, I salute you. I can't say much about the nature of your realtionship but I can say that if the only things that set her into kill mode is being an unrepentant asshole than you're golden.

>>14346177
It's mostly people who blatantly bait or threaten her. She's fine with casual shit, but when it's obvious that people are doing it to piss her off, shit goes poorly.

She finds these reactions hilarious, and freely admits that she was a bit extreme, but stands by her shit. I guess a few months of psych counseling have really helped.

Also, as a final answer for people; she left as a combination between frustration at how shit was being done, increasing anger at people doing the same shit over and over again, and better job prospects that were much less likely to get her killed.

If anyone has any more questions, I'll be on for a little while before some much-needed sleep.

>>14345075
>mortician business cards the Force Recon guys put in the pockets of a bunch of SEALs who were parked outside the wire, and supposed to be keeping watch
>Mortician business cards in the pockets of the supposed guards
>mfw

Oh, man, Force Recon has one hell of a sense of humor.

>>14346322
Your girlfriend is a crazy Zionist motherfucker. If I were you, I'd ditch her before she breaks cover and kills you in your sleep to not leave any trace she was there.

>>14346443
Yeah, she's totally Zionist. The whole "not giving a shit that I'm not religious, never going to convert, and have managed to get her to move more towards an agnostic viewpoint" is totally Zionist. And she spends all day explaining the superiority of the Jewish people, and how things would be better if they controlled everything.

Oh wait, that's how things aren't. Silly me. I'm going to go fry up some goddamn bacon, make some damn sandwiches, and then carte-blanche begin discussing the internal inconsistencies of religion and how it evolved.

Y'know, 'cuz she's a Zionist and will kill me for that, apparently.

>>14346574

This happened a few months ago.
Some guy who I went to highschool with, but never really talked to, walks up to me and a couple of friends while we're in the mall, and starts calling me a punk, bitch, etc.
Apparently, I was at his house last week while he was having a party and stole his weed (I did no such thing).
He pushed me, and I did a pirouette and nailed him in the face. After he recovered, I told him that I didn't know what he was talking about, and that I don't even smoke weed.
He apologized, we shook hands, and calmly parted ways.

That's the only random encounter I've ever had, but it makes a nice story.

>>14345057

System prease?

>>14342441
>>14342441
The only true part about this story is that Finnish folk love their booze.

>1) Mafia being obvious in South Korea, much less Triads
nope.jpg
>2) Mafia using guns in South Korea
nope.jpg
>3) Mafia using an Ingram (usually what people mean by "cheap Uzi-like") in South Korea
hellno.jpg
>4) Your friend attacking someone who has an Ingram
>bullshit.jpg

tl;dr: Your friend is a liar, or you made up the whole thing, including the part about having a friend.

>>14347375
Perhaps I should have prefaced that statement with the fact that I am typing this from South Korea. Shouldn't matter, though. Anyone who knows about Korea other than BEST KOREA'S shenanigans knows the story is blatantly untrue.

>>14347396
the spelling of mafia as maffya was a pretty large hint as wellp

>>14345452
Oh man, this reminds me of a friend's story.

>He goes to Japan on work, normal businessman but is like 6' 3" and musclebound as fuck.
>After work he heads to a restaurant and sits down next to three guys in suits.
>They start talking, turns out they speak excellent English and he's just glad to not have to speak in his broken Japanese anymore.
>Five or six punks all wearing yellow scarves all walk in and start making a fuss and threatening people.
>Friend is kinda a WHITE KNIGHT so just stands up and, being fucking huge, points to the door and tells them to get out or he will beat the shit out of them.
>They all quickly leave.
>Sits down and resumes eating and talking with guys in suits.
>About an hour later the guy who did most of the talking says they have to go and that the tab is on him, he protests but he insists because he did a favor earlier. Doesn't know wtf he was talking about so just shrugs and says thanks.
>After they leave guy behind the counter asks if he knew the guy he was talking to was a yakuza boss and the other guys were his bodyguards.
>Wat?
>"Yeah, he owns this place and you probably kept him from needing to have those punks killed."

>>14341968
Here's the first bit, man. I wish you the best of it.

>>14348169

>>14348377
Sorry, got distracted.

>>14348402
Aaand done.

>>14346443
Am I the only one that read that shitty article and came to the conclusion that jews only breed acordingly when they are slaves