My PC's caused an Exterminatus on the planet.

They were still on it.

>>9903811

.... why would they do that?

>>9903924
Probably so the enemy couldn't take control and/or escape. It was the ultimate sacrifice.

>>9903924
Our creed is this. We are ready, at any moment, to sacrifice all for victory.
- Colonel Cseke, 15th Krieg Siege Regiment

Sent From My Servoskull

>>9904070
CREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED!

In a Savage Worlds custom fantasy setting, the PC's set about a series of terrorist attacks to cripple a hostile military and draw out enemy military figures to assassinate themselves.

The included one party member basically walking into a local guildhall covered in crossbows and trying to recreate the lobby scene in the Matrix, killing as many as possible before being brought down by the guards. That served as a distraction for the others to fuck up the docked naval vessels and blow up the west wing of the palace, killing the governor.

In Dark Heresy we doomed something like 16 billion souls by fucking up our investigation, causing a warp storm to grow worse and turn the paradise world we were on into a daemonworld. The system had two other inhabited planets. One was a Forge World.

Epic psion casting genesis on the prime material after mindslaving an entire nation. Or the same psion using microcosm on the city of sigil just cause it would be funny.

I once overthrew the governments of an entire continent in one game. Why? Because the NPCs in charge were alternatively either complete idiots (On the "Good Guy" side) or pompous villains with no appreciation for the more direct approach. Sure, my character died once (And came back, at the price of his soul, to the prime material)...but now he's ruling over an entire continent, leading an industrially-funded jihad against the nation that has meddled in "My country's affairs for far too long!"

Currently, the campaign is on pause, with the massive army of my former PC now bearing down on the tiny island-nation we're currently on. The campaign went from "Kill the BBEG witch!" to "Form a Resistance against the occupying magical nazis and their stone-plated steam tanks of destruction".

We had a wizard in our group going through the records of a BBEG (also a wizard) we had just killed. He started trying out spells he found, including one experimental fire spell (his character was a bit of a pyromaniac, if there was a spell related to fire, he learned it).

Anyway, it turned out the spell was called Chainfire. He assumed it was like chain lightning. Oh how wrong he was.

The DM informed us that this fire was something that would burn anything. Rock, glass, dirt, steel, even water, eventually. As it burned, it spread. Nothing could douse it. Water slowed it, but eventually the water would boil, and the fire would continue. Even the soil was burned away slowly.

We spent the next three months trying to get people to safety and looking for a way to stop that blazing juggernaut.

>>9904553
By the time we did manage to put it out, over a third of the continent had been reduced to a large, crater like shape and the fire had burned down.

My comrades were doing a GURPS wwii setting behind german lines. As they were scouting out a town, one of them alerted the AA position to our presence. The quad machine guns tore him in half, then woke up the rest of the town. As an allied airstrike began. 3 planes crashed into the town, ordinance exploding as they hit. All that was left was a chalky crater

Players released a bioweapon/magical beastie from its containment canister; beetles which ignited when crushed or threatened. They inadvertently led them on a merry chase, feeding them with smaller villages and settlements, until a climactic battle on a wooden bridge washed the majority away.

Essentially, they committed eco-terrorism on a city-state scale; the remnants of the incident still plague lumber communities and dungeons throughout the game world.
>---
Cyberpunk 2020 game:
Players crashed an orbiting station into a refueling vessel, igniting a fireball inside the 'dome', asphyxiating over 9000 colonists and engineers.

Players fired an advanced railgun into an Amish community; they then left it on 'autofire' for around three hours, depleting both the entire capacitor array (normally used to power a small fleet of tanks for weeks on end) and the ammunition supply (10,560 rounds.) The community was unable to rebuild, as the primary ammo load was depleted uranium. The majority of casualties were cows, horses and slow Amish.

Players entered the city of Rio de Janeiro during a coup (setting was Cyberpunk) and at one point, detonated a chain of MRLS drones which were about to start dropping death-y fire-bad on their position. The weapon they used was a Barrett .50 cal. sniper rifle, fired with what I can only explain as 'indirect fire' and the most complicated use of the skill Physics ever undertaken by a PC in one of my games. Three shots, two hits, and the gigantic statue of Jesus overlooking the city did a spontaneous stagedive into the ghetto.

They were asked to leave by their employer, who recommended they visit the Kaba'a, perhaps as military advisors.

Collapsed eight square kilometres of ground, killing an army of goblins, orcs, ogres, and injuring some giants.

Psyker got captured and forcibly turned into a daemonhost because the psyker and the rest of the party were morons. Lost most of a hive city.

>>9904928

>Players fired an advanced railgun into an Amish community; they then left it on 'autofire' for around three hours, depleting both the entire capacitor array (normally used to power a small fleet of tanks for weeks on end) and the ammunition supply (10,560 rounds.) The community was unable to rebuild, as the primary ammo load was depleted uranium. The majority of casualties were cows, horses and slow Amish.

Where do you live? I will move there JUST to play with your group.

3.x Planescape game. Through successful religion engineering and acts of epic level terrorism, generated so much belief in an Outlands town that 'the end is near,' that the end actually came. The DM ruled that the town and surrounding area shifted into a sort of demiplane of the apocalypse, which promptly began expanding.

>>9905155
New Orleans, Louisiana.
We're looking for someone who can RP a Netrunner who can operate on-the-fly, without involving extensive Net-only RP scenes; think "Door Opener" more than "Johnny Mnemonic" (not the movie ... oh god not the movie).

>>9905014

So wait, they dropped the Jesus statue onto a bunch of drones using a sniper rifle?

Fuck yeah!

>>9905253
No, the shots that hit struck the MRLS dead-on in the warheads/payloads, causing them to detonate, daisy-chaining one blast to the next. The resulting explosion caused the statue to do the Johnny Ramone into Poor People Land.

>>9905241

Damn, I'm a Michfag. Though I could play the role no problem.

>>9905014

I once blew up the entire universe with a time travel paradox that generated an infinite amount of energy.

>>9905307
We're looking into a Skype-based game. On-camera dice rolling and the like.

>>9905299

That's even better!

>>9905392
The character involved, the team sniper, picked up the reputation for being the guy who shot Jesus in Rio de Janeiro. He had stickers and patches printed up.

>No Target Too Big.

Shit, I'd have to say the Devil in a Demon: The Fallen game who managed to recruit himself a whole buttload of young, stupid new Hunters by giving them wings and expanded powers in exchange for Faith.

My Slayer just shook her head and WTF'd. The Hunters are now a corrupt legion under the Devil's control, the Brotherhood of the Radiant Wing. They're a group of NPC villains in our games, now.

>>9905414
That's... my god, that's almost TOO awesome...

In a D&D 3.0 game, our party caused the Apocalypse. By accident. Shit was cash. We played another game in the post-apoc of the world, and managed to fix things by splitting the plane in two, the one we knew, and one where the apocalypse had never happened. The split plane is now sitting on Carceri, without anyone on the plane knowing.

>>9905623
He was eventually shot to death by a crazed Christian survivalist in a Nevada bomb shelter/missile silo. His final "fuck you" was the canister of custom-mixed nerve gas he had installed in his left cyberleg going into "Aerosol o' Death" mode. The resulting cloud of death was centered on where the fight went down: the chapel.

Poetic justice or revenge writ large?
You be the judge.

>>9905784
As final fuck yous go, that's a pretty good one.

One of my players, a newbie, wanted to play Link from Legend of Zelda. After about six levels of regular gameplay, I had them end up in Link to the Past land. Player of Link proceeded to completely screw up the entire chain of events.

Stole the master sword, got one of the sages killed, stole a buttload of Link's magical items, and got himself merged with that Link. Is now part evil shadow link, part regular Link, and Ganon has Hyrule flying over the land destroying everything in his path.

Good job.

>>9905349

... okay, that sounds excellent.

>>9904553
>>9904614
Sounds like your DM is a fa/tg/uy, there was a thread about that called Jacob's Fire. Was pretty awesome, I applaud him for using it.

We were being chased by a few pirate ships. The dumb fucks had cannons and had the brilliant idea of keeping their powder on deck. I used a fire ray to set them off and blow a massive hole in the side of their ship.

Our druid used warp wood to sink the other ship. Two bigass pirate ships dead in the water with our fighters cannonizing their lifeboats and picking off survivors with arrows.

>>9906817

Congrats. You just made me want to run my next 3.5 as a swashbuckling/ship campaign.

I KNEW I bought the Arms and Equipment guide for a reason!

>>9906998

I have wanted all my life to bellow ALL HANDS PREPARE TO REPEL BOARDERS!

Oh god, that would be delicious. Pirates closing to board what they think is another hapless merchant, when the 4th level party emerges from belowdecks, screaming RUN, MY LITTLE CHUNKS OF XP, RUN

Our party somehow got sent back in time to the beginning of the world, where a god told us about his plan to create "Death" as a sort of prank on the other gods. But apparently he didn't comprehend what he was creating, and after Death had taken his loved one he grief-strickenly asked us why we hadn't tried to warn him against creating Death.

Honestly, the idea hadn't really occurred to us that we could convince the god not to make Death, or that he didn't really know what he was doing. But from the way the DM reacted, I think he had expected us to at least try.

So basically, our party became complicit in creating Death through sheer stupidity.

>>9907126
Ohhh SNAP!

>>9907323
>>9907126

I dunno, if you were given the chance to change history, especially by abolishing so integral to our nature as death, would you? All those lives that would have happened suddenly won't now.

You may have the power.
You may have the responsibility.
You don't have the RIGHT.

tl;dr death is good and PCs are good for helping death.

>>9907065
>screaming RUN, MY LITTLE CHUNKS OF XP, RUN

I LOL'ed

>>9907665
>PREPARE YOUR ANUS
Fix'd

>>cremating something in the region of 500 fey who wished they could conjure enough water.
OP what possessed your PCs to do such a thing?

>>9907905

>BURNING FAIRIES TO DEATH

Does he really need to explain why anybody would want to kill fairies?

Played in a game where they tricked the UCS to shoot the sun (improper cosmology of Creation) causing it to explode and wipe out almost every mortal in Creation. A deal with Ceycelene fixed that, but Creation was left with 75% less water and essentially a fuckhuge desert for most of Creation.

>>9907905

The BBEG was a Satyr who threatened to obliterate the major cities of the world with trees and elves. As such, they figured blocking the escape routes they knew about then burning down his home would be the best plan.

Unfortunately, it was his holiday home, and he wasn't there.

I played in a campaign where our group was part of a Death Squad, and our job amounted to committing Orc Genocide. These weren't Mordor Orcs either, these were faggy herbivore Dominic Deegan orcs. We might not've left any deep scars in the crust of the Earth, but we killed thousands, possibly driving a race to extinction, in less than four years.
Maybe it's just me, but looking back out of character and realizing that I helped perform a holocaust is deeply unsettling.

>>9908101
>DD orcs

You did a good thing. A very good thing.

>>9908128
Yeah... Gimme a minute, and I'll tell you a war story. One of our defining moments, I think.

>>9908128

There is no image macro that expresses my approval enough.

There really, really is not.

>>9908144

waiting eagerly to hear of orcs being slaughtered like the bitches they are.

>>9907986

latent homophobia expressed as nerd rage?

>>9908205
>>more like sick of skinny fucking flower people.

Slaughtered a village of gypsies.

Because some fine peasant wenches asked us to.

>>9908349
Disregard Gypsies, Aquire Females?

>>9908195
Third month of the campaign, we'd burned our way along the ridge that seperated the Sarturs from the more civilized lands to the northwest. We stopped at Tujank (African Empire, no analogue) to resupply and sell our loot, but then kept going south to collect on a new bounty, ears from the Leafstander tribe. We burned the first village down, killed everyone, that was standard. What wasn't standard was that Brazzo got caught. Nice guy, squad's cook, fought with a frying pan and a hatchet, great guy. Great guy.

SO MUCH AWESOME. MY MIND, BLOWN.

>>9908412
They caught him in a lightning raid on one of our detachments, and killed his cohort too. We followed them back to their camp, and found them running him around a pole. They'd cut him open, nailed his large intestine to the pole, and then chased him around with a whip until he pulled himself to death. I can't really blame 'em, we had done some pretty awful stuff before hand, but you try thinking that in the heat of the moment.
We were right mad, but the Sarge kept us cool. We took the place by storm once we had scouted out the traps they had set for us, and caught as many of the greens as we could alive. We set 'em all into the fields near the town and set it on fire. Their little witch-doctor did a little dance, and it started fucking raining. The Sarge gets mad, but then calms down, and orders us to build a scaffolding.

>>9908452
Wasn't that hard, it's not like they could run, we had time. Hanging a village requires a lot of wood, but their city design made it kinda easy. A thing you should know about orcs though, at least these ones, is that they've got throats. Goddamn they've got tough necks, you can't really hang 'em, usually gotta jump on their legs once they're already swinging to finish the work, and that's just tedious. The Sarge makes us do it anyway, and we're not gonna question her. She also tells us (and we're mighty confused by this) to tie buckets to their feet once they're swinging. Big empty ones. I dunno why.
So, we string up all the adults, while Richter and Daxxis herd the piglets into the field again. Then Sarge gets the witch out there, and makes sure he sees the adults holding in there. Then we set the fire, and the Sarge marches us out.

We're about 50 yards out of the mouth of the town when it starts to rain.

>>9908479
Oh Christ, I just got it.

>>9908479

That is the best fucking thing I have heard all week. I want to copypasta this and send it to the guy who draws Dominic Deegan.

>>9908479
HOLY SHIT.

WOW.

I'm impressed.

>>9908479
>Sarge
Oh snap.

>>9908637

This made it even MORE awesome!

>>9908479
What are you people, Bosnians? Good God.

>>9904114
That's how I read it too...

Destroyed the Multiverse by killing the Creator. They then merged into a single being to take on it's role.

>>9908637
That's not a Sergeant, that's a Shalalu.

>>9908479
>>9908412
>>9908452
Good God, where are you guys on the Order of the Stick forums when they're bitching over tossing that fagglewaggle goblin off a building?

>>9908479
>>9908759
>>9908759

YES WE ARE

mybad, we were talking about hanging.

>>9908895
Goddamn elves always get overexcited when they go looting.
Also what the hell is this from?

Impressive mainly because they had no clue it would happen.

It's late at night, one of the party members had managed to get a village extremely pissed at him, and a mob was busy stringing him up. The party wizard cast fireball into the centre of the crowd. A fireball covers about 50 squares, and you can fit 2 medium creatures in a square. What the wizard didn't know (becasue he couldn't see the crowd clearly in the dark) is it was mostly women and children. Aside from the 100 people killed outright by the fireball, there were many crushed or trampled as the villagers tried to flee.

This act of mass murder was carried out by the "voice of reason and compassion" in the party.

This thread needs saving.

Also, another story from the DD orc exterminator would be exceedingly excellent.

>>9908992

Guro artist named "carl."

It's 1/3rd guro, 1/3rd women being tortured like dis (pic related) and 1/3rd women being raped at gunpoint. The latter 2/3rds are entirely worth wading through the first 1/3rd.

I think it's up on /rs,/ even.

>>9908637
SERGEANT, WHY DID YOU REQUISITION A HUNDRED AND THIRTY FOUR GALLON BUCKETS!?

>>9909094
That was the story that stands out in my mind the most, I'm afraid, but a part of me wants to start holding a daily storytime from a veteran of the Ridge Wars. How's everyone feel about that?

>>9909044

glorious.

>>9909162
Sure. Can you give us an hour (and a timezone?)

>>9909096
>All three thirds are crazily worth wading through
Fix'd

>>9909162

YES

>>9909192
10:00 for me, let's say, so... Like 00:00 for 4Chan.

>>9909202

http://www.megaupload.com/?d=tbtb5sjz

right off of /rs/.

... I'd be lying if I said I didn't fap to the guro.

>>9909259
Nice. Diaries of a War Criminal?

>>9903789
Your PCs are my heroes

>>9909162
Honestly a GIANT epic thread would make me happier, but putting them up one by one onto 1d4chan is also doable.

>>9909288
I can't be a criminal, there were no rules. I mean, we kind of had them, but the Orcs didn't care, so why should we?

>>9909264
I've already seen them all. I'm just saying that the guro is good.

We raided a small village with a dragon, kidnapped a young woman, and wrecked the place up

Shit was so cash

>>9909301
I'll write 'em on my breaks, but just for you, I'll write a big one every so and so often, to commemorate a special occasion. For now, It's almost my shift and I've gotta run, but remember to tune in tomorrow at Zero-Zero.

>>9909319

oh, yes. link for the curious, then.

>>9909357
Hell Yeah. Storytime after-hours? I've got something to look forward to now.

>>9909096
He really don't like them girls and boobs.

Why he dun liek boobs? ;_;

>>9909357
Looking forward to it :)

>>9909436

I feel the same way. :<

>>9908895
>>9909096

This is fucking sick.

Not in a good way. Seriously. What the fuck.

Can someone archive this thread? There's a lot of win stories inside it.

>>9909474
Welcome to the internet.

>>9909502

"This is the internet" is not an excuse for rape and violence for someone's perverse fetish.

>>9909526

troll... or mis-wording? YOU DECIDE, AMERICA

>>9909526

Actually, it is.

>>9909555

No, it is not.

>>9909555
Nah. As long as they're cryin', my erection ain't dyin'.

>>9909570
This. /r/ more pictures of crying bitches.

>>9909563

I'm afraid it is, that's hardly the worst stuff you could find anyway.

2.0 dnd game. Players poisoned the entire town because one crippled beholder lived in the caves below the city. Had to be sure right?

>>9909610
>>9909610


on one hand i feel bad about fagging up the thread...

but with my other hand I'm fapping.

I once accidentally killed the Goddess of Time and Magic herself with a headshot after three rounds of 20 vs 20 against her paladin bodyguard. That... ended poorly. Luckily, I was a Psion, so guess what? My powers work just fine!

>>9909809
She doesn't look sad enough. MOAR.

>>9909809
>>9909809
And I'm going to miss out on more awesome stories. Can you please just make a new thread for posting that?

>>9909847
>don't shit up my thread, shit up the whole board!
Fuck yourself, cockweasel.

>>9909831
>>9909847

.... stories win.

>>9909705
do beholders drink water?

My acolytes abandoned their post, taking two valuable experiments for their Inquisitor (a mutant and daemon vessel, respectively). In addition to letting such filthy heretics and Inquisition's dirty laundry mingle with respectable Imperial society, their desertion resulted in a suspected cult successfully completely a ritual that led the Tyrant Star to Scintilla.

So, yeah.

>>9909264

For some reason that megaupload isn't working. Sadness.

>>9909958
>completing

This is why I need more sleep.

>>9909874
Thank you :)

Also if you're who I think you are I like your art and the quests you run.

>>9909996

no draw/questfag here. Just a troll who listened to reason.

... holy shit, what just happened

In Call of Cthulhu, we decided to deal with a cult that summoned Cthulhu by calling Azathoth and then getting the hell out of dodge. The Keeper ended up deciding that some random sorcerer or mythos-aware librarian had a bout of lucidity and dismissed the big A, but not until after Azathoth had 1) dealt with Cthulhu and 2) destroyed half the planet.

Two investigators went permanently insane in one session, but the other three survived somehow.

>>9910047
/tg/ can be awesome like that. And that means you're part of the awesome.

"I stick my lightsaber in the warp drive."

a moon disappeared that day along with three young jedi and a whole mess of space pirates.

>>9910180
I like how concise, yet utterly hilarious this was.

Jeez, the worst I've done was when my psyker rolled triple nines inside of a hive. All of them went to Perils. Two different wide area damage effects and one gravity reversing effect. The ruling was that I pretty much killed or maimed every minor NPC in the radius... I rolled a kilometer.

My lone psyker accidentally killed and maimed a cubic kilometer worth of Imperium Hiveworld.

>>9910361
Wait, one km *radius*? That's not a cubic kilometer. That's 4(ish) km^3

>>9910158

I... I feel redeemed! Yaaay!

>>9910180

EPIC SACRIFICE.

(DM): "The space pirates have you surrounded on all sides. They slowly level their weapons. 'Any last words before you die?' the Captain asks you."

(Player): "Ah, yes, death. But first... CHEECH, YOU FUCKING BANTHA-SUCKING FAGGOTS!" (To DM:) I STICK MY LIGHTSABER INTO THE HYPERDRIVE"

>>9909302

Sorry, bro. That makes you worse then them. You hold to the standards, don't dip below them, or you are flat out worse then they are.

We had been given orders by our boss, the Trade Prince, to eliminate a group of rival traders that were operating without permission in his territory. We were to not only slaughter all of the employees (but leave a few to carry the word), but to destroy their merchandise.

We found out a bit later that they were slavers. They had the slaves traveling in groups manned by a few slavers with swords and bows. The slaves were all linked to one another by chain and manacles so they would have to move as a group. If one got too tired or passed out, they'd be pulled along by the rest of the group. They also had a few carts bringing up the rear.

We waited until they were crossing the mountains to attack. A few well placed spells, arrows, and two landslides to seal them on a single bit of the path was enough to make most surrender. We picked the most weak willed and cowardly to return, knowing they'd blow the whole thing out of proportion. We knew we had to kill the slaves before the witness left, and that's when the sorcerer got a wicked idea.

We tied the groups of slaves to each other, as well as some of the slavers that we didn't turn loose. We then tied the carts together and then tied the carts to the last group of slaves.

Then we pushed the carts over the edge. They held longer than we'd expected, and quite a few survived (the initial fall, anyway). Scared the survivors shitless.

>>9911252

>>9911252
This gif is for whoever thought that up.

>>9910959
Atrocity is 9/10ths hypocrisy, 1/10th brutality.

>>9911252
Why did you have to kill all the slaves exactly? Would setting them free constitute destroying the merchandise?

Well some of my players once decided that throwing rocks at the Lady of Pain was a really cool idea.

>>9911487
Well hey, some of your players are fucking jackasses.

>>9911487
Apply directly to forehead.
Apply directly to forehead.
Apply directly to forehead.

PC rogue chucked a flask of alchemist fire to distract the city guards so he could skip town with his burglarized loot. This is high summer, an inland town undergoing a drought. To top it off, 95% of the buildings are wooden with sod roofs. Long story short: Worst disaster in the history of the land. 3/4ths of the town burns down, killing hundreds before the capital could send spelllcasters to deal with the raging fire.

>>9911395
Probably. But it wouldn't send enough of a message. We became known as "Murid's Butchers" after a distinguished service record. It was an evil campaign, and we played for keeps.

I have two more from other games. We were playing Changeling: The Lost and our freehold was under threat of being consumed by a kingdom of freeholds. They had been headed by summer for the last few years and were seizing territory by force when they didn't join freely (which many did). Needless to say, our Winter monarch disliked them very much.

They moved in a shitload of soldiers near our freehold under the guise of a weapon and gun show. We went there to parlay and recover two leaders from a friendly freehold that had been captured, but the leader was a douche. We were at a loss for what to do, seeing how there was a shitload of pissed Summer changelings with guns and a warehouse full of mortal gun owners. We decided to leave.

Little did we know, one of the members of our party, a Wizened smith, had a bad history with these guys. She had defected. We formed a plan that amounted to storming the room after setting off the fire alarms, grabbing the leaders, and getting out of dodge.

Shit hit the fan, though, when we went in too soon. A firefight erupted, but we were able to free the leaders in the chaos. We could've escaped with that, but the Wizened wanted vengeance. She used a contract (can't remember the name, but it lets you damage normal objects) to destroy the main supports of the building. It caught most of the Changelings in the collapse.

A SWAT team showed up as we were leaving, and we had the displeasure of being spotted by them as we were fleeing through a hedge door. Thus they saw a group of Changelings in their full, unmasked, terrifying glory.

Our Winter monarch was displeased.

Atlantean Undeadslayer and Glitterboy follow a few alien d-bees into the tunnels under a Mexican town. They spot the enemy and the immediate response fromt he glitterboy....

"I shoot it with my boom gun!"

Underground. In a clearly described not well supported hard-packed earth cave structure. Underneath a populated town.

He destroyed an eight of the town and killed 75 people, and injured well over 100 more, and buried himself and the Undeadslayer under several tons of dirt.

>Our Winter monarch was displeased.

Bitch has NO appreciation for style.

Mine destroyed the world. Or at least allowed its destruction. Got sucked through to an alternate reality so survived themselves, but everything else was...well... gone.

>>9911395
Because that wouldn't be awesome

>>9911518
That wasn't the end of it, though. They were timid for a while, but they eventually got pissed. We had a few skirmishes with their members that were inconclusive. They eventually decided they could crush us with acceptable losses.

Our Winter monarch, great guy that he is, chose a group of hard asses from the freehold on a secret mission. We were to infiltrate a dinner between the leaders of the courts of the kingdom (Winter, Spring, Fall, Summer), dispose of one of them, have the Winter monarch (a mirrorskin) disguise himself as them, and then use that leverage to eliminate the leadership.

As all plans do, shit hit the fan. We were leaving the kitchen when the opposition's Winter monarch bumped into us. Our Summer enforcer put her down, and hard. The Winter monarch disguised himself as her and told us to dispose of the body while he went out to the other monarchs to stall for time.

Our insane Summer enforcer and our fall mad wizard decided the quickest way to do this was to chop the Winter monarch to pieces and put her body into the main course - a big chili. We also enacted the core of the plan - we poisoned the food; we had all been given the antidote ahead of time and it wouldn't affect us.

>>9908479
Ok, this is just sick. You're a sad, fucked up little creature.

about to archive. What tags should I use, in addition to "epic, stories?" I hate undertagged archive entries, it's Bad.

>>9911627
Oh come on, they cotton-candied a pole with the chef's guts, they're probably just lucky there wasn't enough wood around to crucify them all.

>>9911589
(continued)
We served the food and, because the kingdom was so big, the other monarchs weren't suspicious that they hadn't seen us before (they were unfamiliar territory, this was an impromptu command center for their conquest of our territory).

The madmen in the group had to make willpower rolls to keep from laughing when they saw the monarchs (including our own) eating the chopped up kingdom Winter monarch. They succeed (barely). The poison finally kicked in.

The Autumn monarch died first with great drama. Unfortunately, the Summer and Spring monarchs made their saves. Spring monarch (a golden elemental man with glowing eyes, high wyrd, fucking terrifying) flew into a blood rage. Our Winter monarch (still disguised) faked a slow death, cursing the Spring monarch for their betrayal. He rolled well.

The Summer monarch grabbed the Spring monarch by the throat and strangled her to death. The peacenik of our group, a school principal that was not at all happy with the way things were going, took the iniative and grabbed the Summer monarch from behind. He was a big guy and was able to hold him.

Summer monarch was not about to die like a bitch, though. He used a high summer contract (can't remember which) that is essentially laser hate vision. He lasered the Winter monarch, rolled really well, and put him into incap. Our Summer enforcer began to punch the shit out of Summer monarch, lamenting all the while about how awesome he was.

Summer enforcer nearly died from hate-o-vision, but was able to beat the monarch to death. We fled the scene with our brutalized Winter monarch and watched the power vacuum cause untold chaos. It didn't help them that our Winter monarch kept killing and impersonating leadership to fuck with them.

From then on we were known as the most terrifying freehold on the west coast.

>>9911649
Epic, Writefaggotry, Disaster, Atrocity?

>>9911589

>Our insane Summer enforcer and our fall mad wizard decided the quickest way to do this was to chop the Winter monarch to pieces and put her body into the main course - a big chili. We also enacted the core of the plan - we poisoned the food; we had all been given the antidote ahead of time and it wouldn't affect us.

>>9911687
Ah yes, faerie politics at its finest.

This changeling story reminds me I should look into WoD games more often.

>>9911684
The more I think about it... I have even worse stories. This one is at least for justice.

So, we were playing Exalted. My character, a Zenith with some disguising larceny charms, infiltrated an Immaculate monastery on an island off the coast of the Blessed Isle and painted a gigantic Zenith cast symbol over their largest altar along with the line: "WE HAVE RISEN, WE HAVE RETURNED". They panicced, we all had a hearty good chuckle.

The following day, when we planned to leave, a young guy who worked in a brothel underwent a Solar exaltation when he punched a butch Dragonblooded out for getting too rough. The Immaculates, who were already in a frenzy, went into action quick. We killed a few mooks and soldiers and were leaving with the newbie Solar when we were confronted by a massive group of Immaculate monks headed by a badass old Dragonblooded.

Two of our members rushed on ahead to the small boat and went out to see to fetch our airship, which was hidden a way out. We would have left with them, as well, but the captain of our airship happened to limit break at this moment - foolhardy contempt.

We get embroiled in a massive battle, my Zenith ends up maiming the head dragonblooded with a gigantic, disfiguring scar and tells him her name so he can spread some fear of her when people see his face.

Things look good until an additional 60 some immaculates (the island's monastery was used for training) rushed us. The airship arrived at that moment and opened fire on them with its essence cannon, killing probably 20-30. We also shot the temple full of essence, burning it mostly to the ground (it also happened to be a historical and tourist attraction for the island).

Good news: We saved the newbie Solar and fucked up those Immaculate bastards. Bad news: The Captain and I both earned Known Anathema(7).

Wise words gleaned from experience:

"Never, under any circumstance, have the players infiltrate a nuclear plant."

>>9911685

added and archived.

http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/9903789/

>>9911788

>Known Anathema(7).
>Backgrounds have a five-point scale.
>My face.

>>9911788
Last story I can think of. At least this one's chaos is contained to ruining a single family.

So we were playing Hackmaster. I was a Knight Errant. The class specializes in shifting blame and is good enough at bullshitting that they can justify a good alignment even if they are clearly chaotic evil.

Among our party we had an evil Puppetmaster and a dumb as fuck fairy. The Puppetmaster valued his knowledge above all else. Well, my Knight had broken a magical artifact in a moment of profound greed and stupidity, causing a magical eruption. Everyone (but my character) got fucked over a little, but the Puppetmaster lost some of his skill in a knowledge ability. He plotted revenge.

His idea was to use a love potion that the fairy created and would slip into a drink to make the party leader, a female cleric, fall in love with him, making my character jealous. He'd then use his position of power to fuck with my Knight constantly. The fairy, not grasping any depth of the revenge in this, decided it'd be funnier if she slipped the potion into my character's drink.

As luck would have it, the first person he saw was the cleric, whom he fell completely in love with. The Puppetmaster didn't know this, however, and placed the moves on the Cleric. Shit hit the fan fast.

After he tried to force himself on the cleric, my Knight went nuts and chased after the Puppetmaster, who happened to be out in the middle of the road in broad daylight. They confront each other and the Puppetmaster begins to give a huge, gloating speech.

He's cut off mid sentence by being cut from the top of his head down to his sternum with a single blow. My character is arrested. (continued)

Known Anathema is a FLAW. Not a backgtound.

>>9911929

Don't they work on a five-point system too, though?

>>9911891
My character gets through the trial after the love potion and general dickery comes to light. However, he still has to make a public apology on behalf of the family. The family, in this case, happened to be very rich and very powerful.

I use my shifty blame powers to shift the blame of all of this, through very crafty wording if I say so myself, onto the monk of our party. He had terrible luck the entire campaign, including rolling so bad as to break his hand by missing and punching a wall, having a miniature raincloud follow him for two weeks as a result of me destroying the magical artifact, and having a homeless guy kick the shit out of him.

Generally everyone accepts my bullshittery. The father of the puppetmaster, a general, tells me that he accepts my apology, but that the guy's mother, a powerful illusionist, doesn't.

She challenges my Knight to a one-on-one duel. He, being an arrogant prick, agrees. A fight ensues in which we are both almost dead (though I didn't know I was close at the time). She kills my character by using an illusory fireball that, since I rolled bad, believed was real.

But that wasn't the end of it. The Puppetmaster's family forked out the cash to have him resurrected and he spent the rest of the campaign destroying villages and all of our subordinates and friends as revenge. Nowhere we went could escape his reach. To him, collateral damage wasn't a byproduct, it was a method.

>>9911947

No, they can range in point value quite a bit.

Though I'm lulzing on the inside at the idea of a 'legendary known anathema' background. What would that even mean?

>>9911968
We're the only Solars to have attacked the Realm in history. And we did it pretty vulgarly. It meant that even peasants recognized us. It also meant that showing our faces was enough to cause anybody but an Immaculate monk to flee in terror (the story of our exploits grew exponentially with time), though it also meant that we were a glowing beacon of "KILL US AND BECOME A QUADRUPLE HERO".

>>9912003

The joke being that attacking Solars is kind of a 'an hero' idea anyway.

>>9912003
WE ARE THE BBEG

ANYBODY WHO WANTS ALL THE PRIZES GET US TO DEATHVILLE

>>9912003

I'm picturing an Immaculate monk saying your picture's caption.

I am giggling.

>>9911968
>>9912003
Er, ignoring Bull of the North, of course. But he did it with an army, and is only one Solar. There was five of us, on the other hand, and we had first age technology all to our lonesome.

>>9912028

Was it an attempt to telepathically mind control the entire realm that backfired and instead gave all subjects general knowledge of your names, history, appearances, and exalted status?

bumping

..wow. I took a nap, held a Skype game (sort of) and returned to see the thread still alive.

I love /tg/.

Atrocity v. 4, D&D3.5.

Players investigate collapsed silver mine, looting/looking for survivors. They meet up with a gibbering Dwarf in the shreds of his uniform (mine foreman) who is only able to draw sigils to communicate (as he'd swallowed his own tongue, trying to kill himself; explained shortly).

They sit through almost ten minutes of him painstakingly telling his story, ask a few questions and find an airshaft leading into the foundry below (as the silver mine was, at one point, a steel foundry until they discovered silver under it).

They then threw him down the airshaft, using the rationale "Hey, he's already pretty traumatized - what is it going to do, drive him *extra crazy*?"

They were right.
It did.
He hunted them down, becoming much like the things which terrified him halfway into madness (until the PCs helped him the rest of the way).

The BBEGs?
>Drow Skinners.
Picture the badass it takes to get that clever pirate nickname for your species.

Destroying a city, setting fire to a forest filled with Elves, having a friend's soul stolen. Good times.

We get tasked with saving a young dragon-lady who's being held captive with a cursed choker that prevents her from taking dragon form. The guy who gives us the mission hands us some kind of magical sphere that we're supposed to touch the choker with to remove it.

We fight our way to the top floor of where the dragon-lady is, and outside her room we come across some kind of fighter dude. But he claims to be there to *protect* her, not hold her captive-- apparently somebody's trying to assassinate her.

But we convince him, with the help of my Paladin swearing a god-oath, that we're here to help her. So he stands aside and lets us touch the choker with the sphere.

At which point the choker starts to contract inexorably.

The dragon-lady gets slowly choked to death. The bodyguard jumps out of a tower window in despair after she dies. We end up fleeing the country, since the dragon-lady had been under the protection of the local ruler (he was the one who hired the bodyguard). My Paladin had to take on some kind of quest from his god to avoid losing his powers.

Did not go as planned.

random oWoD campaign set in Koln (Cologne). the PC's were a bunch of camarilla vamps, plus me (demon) under siege from sabbat warpacks. long story short, we royally fucked up a scouting mission and an enormous brawl ensues. we had something like 7 pc's versus 20something sabbat vampires. that disrupts some god-summoning ritual being done by the sabbat bishop in the city. the explosion sends the entirety of koln back to 1600's spain, off the coast of barcelona. somehow the GM ties it in to our barcelona campaign before that had werewolves, mages, kuei-jin, and fae. wut.

from barcelona we're transported to feudal japan where the story ties in AGAIN to our japanese campaign, and also our LOTR campaign. cue total insanity as vampires, werewolves, mages, demons, elves, fae, kuei-jin, weretigers, weredragons, and bygone beasts all fight in one gigantic melee and pretty much lay waste to everything. IIRC it was our group and gil-galad (yes, THAT gil-galad) versus all comers.

it was pretty stressful last couple of sessions for that campaign.

Dnd 3.5, in Ravenloft. The party was a werebadger, a half-elf druid/cleric who was also a mummy (yeah), and some kind of half-vampire DMPC.

The half-elf had begun as a druid, then found out it would be possible to get more powerful by becoming a mummy, and then decided to multiclass into cleric. He wandered into the first temple he could find (which was devoted to the Lawgiver) and asked to be initiated; this initiation involved getting into a whip-fight.

Yes. A whip-fight.

Long story short, the high priest decided that the half-elf was part of a prophecy, and sent him on a quest to recover an intelligent whip. This whip was constantly craving the blood of "infidels," and lo and behold, just down the road there's a temple of the all-female religious order who worships a goddess who was supposedly the Lawgiver's concubine (according to the Lawgiver clerics, anyway)

We were 14. We walked in, barred the doors, and proceeded to rape and slaughter the occupants en masse. The half-elf got his own Dark Realm shortly after.