Yo, play me in.

So there's a new Lich in town? Yo, you know I'm on it, put down this undead sucka with some supernatural spit, I match wits, son, and don't you think that you can ever step to me, Detect Evil and I roll in to kick some evil ass truly, unruly, when I step into the mothafuckin room, Pelor bout to light it up and show ya to your doom, I step with the power of a fuckin monsoon, your bitches swoon soon as I tune up and step right up to the mic, to make it fair I'll sheath my sword and stick with Unarmed Strike, now you think you're epic level, I see you poppin champagne, but I'm sorry to inform you your ass is better suited for a low-level campaign, your rhymes is tame and your flow is a shame, I got smitin' on my brain so why don't you stop playin games? Justice, what.

I'mma Ooze, I don't know how to loze.

I must admit, I don't know how to quit.

I blame my lack of schooling, but still I be ruling.

......

Food plz?

>>9528649
WHAT SHIT YOU BE TALKIN' 'BOUT BOY?
I'VE SEEN GELATINOUS CUBES DROP HARDER RHYMES THAN YOU.

ALRIGHT. YOU WANNA DROP SOME BEATS?
CHECK IT.

I WAS JUST A LITTLE BOY,
GOT A THOUSAND DREAMS,
GOT A THOUSAND BEAMS,
OF SUNSHINE IN MY HEART.

LAWFUL GOOD WAS MY MIDDLE NAME.
PALADIN OR CLERIC WAS MY FUTURE FAME.
HAILED GODS EVERYDAY,
MY PARENTS WOULD SAY,
THAT WORSHIPPING AND PIOUSNESS WAS MY GAME.

BUT LOOK AT HERE,
YOU SACK OF BONES,
I GOT KNIVES,
I GOT STYLE,
I GOT FUCK GOOD CLOTHES.

I GAVE UP GOD,
FOUND THE TRUTH IN THE WORLD,
ALL, BECAUSE, I FOUND MY LITTLE GIRL,
AND SHE DIED,
NO REASON OR RHYME,
SHE DIED,
WAY BEFORE HER TIME,
SHE DIED,
THERE WAS NO OTHER WAY,

NEUTRAL CHAOTIC.
I'M HERE TO STAY.

>>9528899
>now you think you're epic level, I see you poppin champagne, but I'm sorry to inform you your ass is better suited for a low-level campaign

OOOHHHHH SHHHIIIIIITTT

>scroll down /tg/
>see rap thread

pic related

This better not be copy-pastes from the archived rap thread.

If it is, I'll be very sad.

>> This Thread.

I got 99 problems but the lich aint one

15 minutes for me to drive down to the department and deliver some final grades.

When I get back it's on.

Pic related.

>>9529254
fuck that shit boy, but i didn't even know there was already an archived thread.

c-c-check me out,
white skull.
You think you're better than me?
I'm blacker than drizzt,
Spin better shit than Lolth,
you gotta watch your back or you gonna face my wrath.

Seen a thousand guys try to drop their beats,
there was even a bard with rhyming feats.
Do you really think you're a stone cold killer?
you can't even compare to the Gorgon's filler.

God damn, boy, i've seen rhymes more divine,
in this little black finger of mine.
trust, i won't whine, and you won't shine,
why the fuck, do i want your soul to be mine?

I don't want your shitty mike,
your phylactery,
i've seen better loot,
in a level 0 party.

>>9529365
oh fuck shit is going to go down

BASS DRONIN
BIKE SHINEY
DAKKA SQUADRON
MOST MIGHTY

YOUZ CANT HAVE A RAP BATTLE WIFFOUT DA BOSS

OI, CHECKS IT

evrry day is 'Ard Boyz, a fight to da end
when it comes to da rhymes, bein a lich is da trend
but we is fight ghosties an banditz, devilz an fiendz
even psycho robots from dem sparkly space mahreenz
da orkz wuz made to fight an win
our dakka gives pelor a toofy grin
when you sling choppas an dakka like thugs 4 life
da gods pay attention, an so does ur wife
bonds of matrimony shatter like ur jaw
when shes moanin "GO FASTER" an takes a power klaw
DA BOYZ IZ BACK AN WE IS BACK FER GOOD
TAKE UR 5 SYLLABUL RHYMES AN MAKE EM ORKY, OR BE FOOD

>>9529592
THIS

This is awesome. You should all feel proud.

Yo punk ass better listen
When Im dissin'
I'm da masta of dis sound
Smoking Liches in one round
I'm a fasta with dese hands than ol' Raistlin!

I'm a spell for hire
A casta most dire
I'll be blowin yo brain
With my skills so insane
Throwin some sweet, sweet balls of fire

Dont ya disrespect my age
Cause I'm wise like a sage
Dont be hating on my beard
Cause things might go weird

No I aint afraid
Dont fear no undead raid
Got nothin' to lose
And I'll be chillin with booze
Before this night is through
I'll be smokin' YOU!

You ain't no lich
You just my bitch

>>9529506
Do you know what I am saying?

>>9529365
OH FUCK, SWORD N' BOARD!
THIS SHIT IS GOING TO BE AWESOME!

da bass is da home of evrry git on da floor
emm cees an deejays know da bass iz da core
when uz master da bass youz is on ur way
to payin ur billz by rhymez and all comers, flay
liches got flow, got all der reagents in a bowl
but da bass aint in da old bones, its in da soul
orkz was made from fungus but we iz got da heart
we has all we needz to take ya apart
youz got fancy mechanics in ur roll playan gaems
but da bling-bling minis work best wif da dames
so when ur squadron is dong city and ur wonderin why
check ur sexual pref...pref...IZ WUT U LIKES A GUY?

ohgodohgodohgod

>>You ain't no lich
>>You just my bitch

>>My face

/r/ Chaos rap. I'm a dumb, and someone needs to rep Slaanesh or Papa Nurgle. Khorne would just be screaming SKULLS repeatedly, and Tzeench would probably just repeat "Just as planned, I'm the man."

>>9528899
Detect Evil? Your INT must be Zero
If you can't see that we're no Hero
I'm carved from nightmare
I'm a sight to scare
So maybe
you can see
that there might be something evil in me

My mic is a bone wand of raise dead (8)
I'm powered by nothing but undying hate
I have a fist carved of dragon bone
So hold the phone
Coz it's time that I own
So you can be sewn
Back together
Forever
and ever

Pelor ain't got shit on me
Spine stolen from a dead god
I'm a shifting the immovable rod
When K-rypt give the nod
I'll send you to meet your maker
Then we'll start to make ya
Anew
Soul trapped, coz we're crafty like Vimes
Mind eaten, to power my rhymes
Body raised, to help bring the end times

>>9529772

Bravo.

GET READY TO RUMBLEEEEEE

>>9529822
Holy SHIT Doomrider rap?

FUND THAT SHIT

Yo what up my mothafuckas I'm a fuckin' STORM MAGE
Filled with a thousand volts o' lightnin' and unending death RAGE
I hear you talkin' like it be cool to be bad
Well it ain't cuz you see when you fuck with the earth the sky gonna bite back
Gonna rip you in half strike you down take you out with these bolts from above
Yo-- You hear that sound?
It's me comin' down to put you back in the ground!

You fuckin' with the wrong kind of magic you damn bony fool
Cuz when you play with fire, you gonna get burnt
Well you just been playin' with thunder', now reap the whirlwind.

>>9529692

dey told us da squats wuz just a legend
but herez prroof not all bets arr worth hedgin
here comez a dwarfy wavin a campfire
got heats an beats but not fit ta be me squire
cuz what da dwarves never figurred out in forevah
wuz dat a great orky waaagh haz no equal, no more clevauh
Skull Pass iz me home, won in a charge quite clutch
cause when its d6s to roll, da millionaire got da touch
so head out on ur ram, dis battle iz ur doom
whoda thought a dwarfy beard would make such a good broom?

>>9529365
Oh shit! Shit is goin' down!

Scrolling down /tg/ listening to Captain Dan, suddenly THIS THREAD FUCK YEAH

A rap thread again?
I'll try out my luck
cause ya'll heretics know I'm last stop for the buck
I'm hailin' from Fenris, my rhymes be ice cold
so sit back and enjoy less you wanna be told
cause to rap against me is sure death, like my world
my words flowin' free like the Kraken unfurled
its tentacles to grab ya, like they grabbed at me
but you could be rapper, Kraken, I care not what you be
cause you rhyme 'gainst the best, boy
you're rhyming 'gainst me.

IM BRINGIN THIS SHIT DOWN
ON TOP OF YA ZONE
IM GONNA WRECK ALL YA FAGGOT SKULL-BONES
IM GONNA GRIND YA BLOOD AND
CRUSH YA FUCKIN FACE AND NOSE
LIKE A CAVE-IN OF YA FUCKING RETARD FLESHJ
FOR KHORNE

YOURE IN FO A FUCKING BLEEDIN WALLOPIN
THE WORLD HAS NEVAH SEEN BEFORE

BOB-WAH!

>>9529907
Now some people might be sayin'
What's a bitch doin' in this game?
No I ain't no bitch I ain't no lich I'm a propa fuckin' lady
An' if you disagree you've earned a bolt up the ass

Now MC DJ you're a pretty fly boy and you been on the scene way longer then me
But some times you gotta step down
Pallies ain't shit compared to the power of storm
I don't even care if you got the blessin' of Torm

The elements pick me for a very special task
I gotta travel the earth with my hand on my gat
got lightning in my hand and thunder in my mind ain't nobody stoppin' me from doin' this deed
not no lich not no pally not no scrub orc MC

Peace with the elements, yo.

This thread is awesome and you should feel awesome.

Homey's comin' out swinging, he's capslock cruisin'
combination lyrics that be straight-up abusing,
K-Rypt Mastah throwin' down, its more than amusing,
but against Divine Justice you don't just go accusing,
and don't get complacent lest ya get caught snoozin',
Justice ain't gonna be excusing yo' chaotic display,
prayin' ain't gonna save you once you're his prey,
cuz DJ rolls balls-deep in lawful good vajay-jay,
and into this foray I do now make an injunction,
oh my bad, almost forgot my introduction:

Sword n' Board motherfucker, S to the B,
veteran lyricist and traditional games emcee
who ventured into hell and crossed swords with Phylactery.
I'm the marquee of rhythm, I'm iller than Kim Jong
and like Donkey Kong I'm throwin' down barrels and kegs,
I'm sippin the finest wine; you slurpin' nothing but dregs,
and it begs the question: how hard you wanna get beat?
My flow's like water, but harder than concrete,
so step up to the mic if you wanna compete,
just be aware of yo' impending, inevitable defeat.

Oh shit, it's going down!

I'M SO PROUD OF YOU /tg/

>>9529692
Oh you is the master?
Think you're a real caster
I'm gonna mothafucking blast ya
Coz the reaper is faster

You think your fire is deadly
I got myself a medley
of epic spells that I'm steadily
casting like cantrips
lemme give you some tips
From a real age
Born in another age
When the world was new
And punks like you
Weren't yet a gleam in my youthful eye
You can try
but you can't defy
your end is nigh
And it looks like me

I might be white
I'll give you a fright
With my eternal night
and my DJ Death Knight
The only light
You see
Will be me
At the end of the tunnel
As your spirit I funnel
into my box
Made from skulls of warlocks
You hear them knocks
It's spirits deceased
I keep them leashed
to give me the beats
to make me move mah feets
Untill the end of days
Which might seem far away
But is coming today

Your end is a little more near
you'll lose more then your life
Death might not cause you fear
But you don't get no afterlife
As your body kills who you hold dear
Your soul to power my tunes
Your mind to make fell runes

You'll be a weight
My new undead mate
And you won't know better
then to heed my command
Right down to the letter
Backing up my band

>>9530015
>I'm iller than Kim Jong

oh my god, I've never made that connection before.

>>9529801

oh boy, a beakie! dis oughtta be fun
oh wait, wuts dat? spork maroons nevuh run?
well u says dat now, but itz only turn one
Snikrot an da kommandos are ready ta have fun
da shockk attack gun is primed an ready
an Grotsnik's 'hurty syringe is filled wif AIDS a plenty
but u is used to dat, da AIDS an medic tents
cuz battle brothers like ta bone, and all beakies are gents
not even slaanesh iz as durty as an ork
chaos got no chance against da might o Gork an Mork
pour blood on ur altars, skin urself and march to da game
ull need everything, too bad its gonna end the same
like when da doom of mala...mala...SPOOKY BRAIN killed da Eldar
yous got ur heads in ur arse, ur choppas below par
so handovuh ur cocaine, all ur bikes and defilers
ur dakka is alright, but y'all are dressed like Beguilers

>>9530015
Oh shit look who's showin' his face
Old MC Sword and Board the king of the street
But you better watch out where you throwin' them rhymes
You wearing metal motherfucker best not commit any crime
Cuz that steel conducts better than Cantelli ever did

I fucking LOVE this thread.

>>9529913

Dis playa may be small,
But he can slay you all.
With one wave of da hand,
I'll be burnin' da land.
Aye, da burn masta is in da hall!

Your skin be as green as yo Rhymes.
You better get with the times.
I be small like ol' David,
Y'all may be tall like Goliath,
But ya haven' t yet tasted,
The hot balls that I've fired!

Aye, ya better watch ya back,
Cause I'm on da attack.
So you better stop muckin,'
Cause I'll be fuckin,'
Ya up like Ima Wartrack.

Y'all may be green,
But This dwarf be real mean!

To all contributers, see pic.

>>9530015

Choppa and Wedge, me old friend is back!
Now dis heres a humie who can bring an attack
Reminds me of Yarrick, back on Armageddon
Cept dis time I can catch youz, and beat you bed ridden
Youz bring da choppy style, youz got da beat I can tell
but da boyz dont give up, der fury u cant quell
Wez seized da initiative, all our dice turn 6s
Da charge is comin and we gonna turn u ta biscuits
serve you wif gravy at da great mess hall
wes remember da only humie who had da gall
to dink he was so ill he could bring da sickness
good luck, an pray ta Gork u dont end up dickless

>>9530066
Flawless victory.

>>9530117
Oh shiiiit we got one of the men of the earth
Hard as stone 'bout as thick as it too
You call them rhymes they're as cold as a rock
You got no flow, not even like magma,
You better open them vents and let that shit go

i cant rhyme for shit
my rhythm's outta whack
were I competing, i'd be open to counter-attack
though cut me some slack
im just here to show appreciation
for the man sword and board come to jam at his rightful station.
this dedication is more or less just me saying hi
then likely goodbye
as i let those much more fly
take the mic back, for theyre the ones who know how to act
when faced with the pressure under which im sure I would crack
but facing the facts, i've already overstayed my welcome's grace
and now i go back and let the proper deejay's take their place
just one more thing before my half ass rhyme is through
sword n' board: if I were a girl, I'd marry you

Every now and then I cower and I need to find empowerment
Empowerment is paramount to how I can begin to mount
A horse that I can implement
to make a dent on hinderance
Instead of drunk belligerence
and the dissidence of miscreants
Especially in this instance
with the never ending persistence
to use the spells each as ordinance
as if they were blunt instruments
to beat a hole in the defense
of this Big Bad and take vengeance
which serves to just build resistance
in spite of all my good intents.

Well good gods damn and other such phrases
I haven't heard a beat like this in Ages
To miss such a beat would have been outrageous
But when you DM skips a beat its ruthless and aimless

She caught my attention with her bad threats
Then she reeled me in expecting nothing more than missed checks and quick wrecks
But that weren't the case with this evil mistress
She's attracted my interests
So I wanted to impress'.
Upon her all the positive things
That come from worshiping a just and loving King
But that's something that's easier in theory than in practice
Since role play lines are tactics
To get prey and make progress
And this actress
Is practiced
In shunning such theatrics
When put upon daily by tactless hat tricks

>>9530117

hot balls wut u get fer sleepin wif Nurse Verity
didnt da emprah teach u da meanin of heresy?
he aint da boss but even wes orkz can tell
when u bones a hyena, it leaves more dan a smell
if deres one thing dat humies an orks can agree
is dat furry loving heretics all get burned fo free
u try ta bring da sickness but all u shootin are blanks
ur fireballs are cold, bouncin off da hulls ov me tanks
dis fight is ovuh, I got a shoota to ur chest
I guess no one evuh told ya, GREEN IZ BEST

>>9528649
This is only like, the best thread ever

>>9529907
You ever heard of a weight called Razor
Once was just like you, a walking Taser
Didn't let me and my posse phase her
Now she brings the rain and the pain
All for my gain
And it might seem shocking
But it's her crypt I'm rocking
All of the day
When we're away
And the living a walking
Dreaming and talking
We're having or fun
But I could use a +1
She wants a 3some
with a bit more spark
So come into the dark
Or walk towards the light
Coz tomorrow night
You'll be riding one steed
more tricky then Creed
And you're looking right at him

>>9530015
Your rhymes are looser then your asshole
We know how your type likes to roll
Lawful Good?
Like you could
Do what I can do
Let me show you

Hold the phone
For my beats on bone
My rhymes are flowing
Like the souls I'm owing
But harder then death
You must be on meth
to think you can step with me
THe finest MC
That you'll ever see

Career, spanning 3 ages
I've rhymed with the sages
Smoked blunts with the original mages
Wrapped in ancient pages
Of lore worth more
then you people will ever hope to see.

You think your skills with blade is something amazing
Let me show you my power, with the dead I'm raising
I'm beyond epic, I'm a pantheon in one
Throw down with gods, you're out of your league son
Cantrip a fireball to put shame to the sun
Check the beats, Clear my seats, Motherfucker, I'm done.

>>9530225

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF

Check it.

So it's my first time,
Place is looking fine,
Let's get a ryhme
scheme goin down,
Stop acting the clown,
'coz shitz going down,
turn that frown
upside down,
Let's go fight for the crown.

So we're a pretty small race,
Not big on the bass,
but we've got some ace
Tanks around the place,
Won't get to first base,
But jump into space,

And you'll see what I mean,
Our suit are pretty keen,
Pulse guns are pretty mean,
Got a nice clean sheen
To 'em, you can see
your face in 'em, kill spree
with 'em, you prob'ly won't see
'em until your head goes
BOOOOOOM

Come join the Greater Good,
It's a pretty nice hood,
If you knew you'd
join straight away,
come join today,
and that's all I have to say.

Peace, out.

Those scum and fools,
Heretics and Tools,
A veritable Legion of Doom
All with negative IQ,

They all think they be blastin, mix-masterin'
doin' worship with their sound craftin'
and their dark gods laughin'

But there's no better
than the holy emperer,
his grace divine,
make our rhymes flow
and on time

Even nurgle be qualin',
his bitch Isha be pailin'
from khorne, he wails
about the day he failed,

and even slaanesh had to get on the telephone
to tell the eldar that he wanted to come home

even tzentch with his beat,
infinite, sick and unique,
gave up when he saw our flawless technique

so with the smack down that
you are about to receive
there's no doubt that when I'm done
you will fervently believe

so get on your knees
and pray for forgiveness
for the righteous wrath
that will no doubt deliver us

>>9530285
awwwwwww snap

There came a song of wonder
It rang like a bitter fight
Like steel biting into wood
Like explosions in the night

Quietly the fiddler listened
from his darkened cellar hall
And knew this would be remembered
Not by one, but all

Hey hey hey, it's OG Loc, homie,and I'm gonna kick it a little something like this... Hey yo', when I came through up in the place, You don't want me to call with a gun in your face...

Yeah, yeah, yeah... This is me, OG Loc, in the house, baby... And I'm gonna... drop it down for all my real gangsta niggaz... All of my gangsta bitches...


I'm the man in the place, Punch you in the face, A gun in my waist... It's Loc, baby! Yo' it's Loc Loc - it's Loc Loc...

>>9530066

Oh it's on you sack of bones,
Ill be droppin' rhymes like stones,
Like ma spells on yo smelly drones,
So you listen to these impeccable tones.

As the smoke will clear,
You'll be cowering in fear,
Like you never even done in life.
This is the great revive,
Of the legend, the lord,
A commandin' magic word,
Breaking through the icy mists,
As yo body snaps and twists.

This is a return to the livin'
It's a given,
That we be more lively,
So this rivalry,
Is already over and done,
No one standin' but this one,
The one true champion!

>>9530225
Well ain't that a lovely story 'bout your generic hero shit
Inspirin' if not nothing with you overcomin' all adversity
Makin' alignmental conversions from evil to good
Well I got news for you bro alignment means shit in this hood
'less you evil then you're smite'd elsewise ain't gonna mean shit
Less you got the Book of Vile Darkness or the Book of 'Xalted Deeds
But I tell you we up here got deeds like in Exalted
Cuz there no talkin' walkin' shockin' that's gonna convert a lich
You gotta blast him with lightnin' smite evil charge and cleave make him yo bitch
>>9530214
Yo don't feel bad you playin' yo role
Givin props as right to the people who pro
Rhymes a talent and a cross class skill
So don't feel bad you need a level take a point put it in
Then with practice maybe even you can be as good as me

...

Zap, mothafucka.

>>9530332

Oh hey, Jeffrey!

You had best be min-maxing when I step into the game, cause I ain't pullin punches; no retreat from the shame.

YO, I'M AN EPIC LEVEL COMMONER AND I JUST BLEW THROUGH YOUR DOOR
THAT AGELESS ASS IS MINE, IMMA GRIND THOSE LOVELY BONES INTO THE FLOOR
I'VE GOT SIXTEEN ACRES OF FARMLAND BURNING BACK AT MY HOME
YOU RUINED MY INVESTMENTS, SO SAY GOODBYE TO YOUR DOME
YOU'VE MADE A POOR CHOICE OF ENEMIES IF I DO SAY MYSELF
CAUSE I GOT A TORCH AND A PITCHFORK AND A COPY OF SUN TZU ON MY SHELF
I DON'T REQUIRE DIVINITY TO ASSESS THAT YOU'RE IMPURE
I AM DECIDED AND RESOLVED, REST ASSURED; MY FOOT UP YOUR ASS IS THE ONLY CURE
THE UNDEAD ARE SO CONFIDENT WHEN SNUGGLED UP IN THEIR KEEP
BUT I JUST BUSTED OUT THE DECK OF MANY THINGS; READ EM' AND WEEP
I MAY NOT BE A LEGEND, NO I'M JUST NPC
SO STOP CRYING WHEN YOU LOSE: NO SERIOUSLY, WIPE THOSE TEARS OFF YOUR CHARCTER SHEET

>>9530225


dan le sac? is that you?

>>9530088

My links don't conduct, you'd be incorrect to gauge,
My armor's a personal faraday cage,
As I channel my rage, I'm electrically grounded,
so yo' theory's unfounded,

>>9530155

And can't say I'm astounded, look who just rebounded!
The greenskin, back for more after last time pounded,
struck dumbfounded, don't bother instigating,
cuz I'll have you reduced to sword-fellating.
And when the boyz ride out in their buckets of bolts,
Every swing of my sword produces ten-thousand volts,
best give a halt command, if you even know how,
cuz throw your orky ranks I'm about to plow,
but if you try to beat me in melee, you'd best dream on,
cuz yo' six-sided dice don't give me nothin' to feed on,
bitches don't know I'm throwin' dodecahedrons.

>>9530225
*golfclap*

>>9530402
>dodecahedrons

>>9530285
Man you talkin' to me? You a warlock you a lich what the fuck you know
I don't need no rotten-ass bitch tryin to make me his ho
You wan' make me yo steed you gotta catch me first
An' no way I ever gonna date a man with a hearse

Check it, I'm from the City of Wind
High in the sky, Plane of Air, place with no shortage o' sin
My daddy a god of thunder and my ma a djinn
I flighty like the air and more shockin' than a Grasp
You think you can catch me? Yo lightnin' rod is rotten, can't touch this storm.

>bitches don't know I'm throwin' dodecahedrons.
>dodecahedrons

I see da emmcees is out in force
dey dont know is da orkz fuck ur throat hoarse
wes loot shinies, trinketz, ur food an ur torch
u git leff behind like kiddies in a divorce
gubbins and spinny bitz decked on me Porsche
plus fifty big shootas, twin linked of course

>>9530348

fuck yes

I'm fapping harder to this thread than I have to any porn on the internet.

God dammit, I love you /tg/. I love you so much.

Hole up....what the fuck is this I'm seein
A bag a bones, a pally and an ork tribe emceein
well, lemme interject
gotta get respect
Khorne representin blood slingin skulls from spines seperatin
Buildin my throne got brainpans interlacin
I'll take ya bet but betta yet I'll ignore the vig
But if ya misstep best believe imma split ya wig
Ice in my veins. blood in my eyes
Hate on my mind, ya skull is my prize
Fuck divine vengeance this shit is chaotic
not even phylactery's stop me i'm fuckin psychotic
But ya might be too dry for my tastes lemme check my appetite
Marrow works too looks like it's lich on the menu tonight
with a side of sun roasted zealot
fungus, naw forget it, I need blood to function
beside's ya linguistics leave much to be desired, shoulda practiced conjunction junction
Now I'm done servin it, get the fuck back in ya holes
While i'm sittin satisfied on my throne of ya bones

>>9530348

Daaaamn, npcs in da house y'all.

Y'all farmers better stick to yo hoes,
Cause in here you just be steppin' on toes.
Leave the fights to the men,
And the deaths to the bitches.
That's right, you take ten.
And we take the riches.
It's an equation, clear as the day-a
It's even in your name; you're just a non-playa.

>>9530402

A d12 is right scary, u bet
but ders somefin mr. humie, u forget
u aint fightan a boy just dual wieldin gats
but 10,000 boyz, each on da charge, 2 attacks
an if ur faraday faggot armor can repel
de mighty swings of da boyz, rage filled, muscles swell
next up ta bat is da nobs, armed with pointy power klaws
dey gonna ignore ur armor and give ur sword arm pause
one against many is a battle unwinnable
ur head on a stick iz gonna be me new symbol

>>9530579
Hooooooooooooooooooooooooooooolllllyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy
Fuuuuuuuuuuuck

I love this thread.

>>9530486

Oh look, it's an Ork,
All mouth, all talk,
But can it walk the walk,
Or will it balk
At our unified strength,
We'll keep him at arm's length,
Wait till his mates tire,
Then watch them expire,
under a hail of pulse fire,
I ain't no liar,
Ain't had time to accuire,
Got no time to retire.

The Ork shouts and screams,
But in his dreams,
His brittle little schemes,
Break up under extremes,
The Vespid screams,
Turn his mind inside out,
He ain't got the clout,
the pout,
His head's full of doubt,
Coz he;s in the middle of a drought
of firepower,
can't aim for shit,
never score a hit,
whilst our Pathfinders,
send reminders,
to him -say sit
boy, you ain't got a clue,
and soone the Tau Empire will be rid of you.

This thread makes me so happy.

>>9530285

AWW SHIT

You throwin' down verse, trying to pin me an alignment,
but I don't restrict myself to that sort of confinement,
it's an assignment too tedious for the thickest of fools,
My roleplay is based on rule of cool.

They call you necromaster, cuz you like them easy
but the types of chicks you go for would make most queasy.
Even I'm uneasy, to think of fuckin' the dead,
that kind of shit makes me want to put the axe to your head.
Necromaster's the cancer that's killing this thread,
so instead fight a foe closer to your own merit...

>>9530348

...and you'll still lose because all you do is parrot,
while EPIC LEVEL COMMONERS FARM EPIC LEVEL CARROTS

>>9528649
Now all you boys and girls on the mike put the game on the run
But since the first goddamn post, not a peep out of B-1
It's ironic and endearing that this lich wants to step
But in the chaos and confusion, the fucker already left
Now y'all keep your guts and glory, I'm sure SnB has it covered
And you can take your "Just as planned" Lady L's got it brothers
The ork can vacate to a desert island, so he can surf while he WAAAGH's
Maybe he can find a better hobby, like making friends with mike, lu, and og
I'll make my point clear if you haven't got it yet
OP packed up and left, he don't give a shit
I just find it funny how you all F5 maternally, like a gray render
But uh, pic related; it's my face when OP comes back as a kender

>>9530700
Straight. Fuckin' busta-ass lich don't even got the balls to stay in his own thread.

Lady L out. Stay cool and watch for thunder cuz I might be comin' back.

>>9530678

>>9530160
Cheers

>>9530336
You think I'm made of bones still
Bitch I'm not even corporeal
Your spells I'm dispelling
Like your tones ain't selling

Coz you can't compete
With my kind of heat
You think you know hot
You aint seen half of what I got

I'm the meaning of fear
Your time's drawing near
But death ain't got shit on me
I don't stay dead see
Like a certain lord from Teajy
I'm the eternal MC

You call that magic
Your rhymes are just tragic
I'm beyond any of you
I'm unborn anew
If you want to get smacked down
Behind the runt is the queue

You call that Ice
I guess it'll suffice
But I'm the master of cool
As continue my rule
I'll make you my tool

You'll only return to life
So I can get out my knife
And give you some strife
Torture eternal
Find your flame Internal
Twist it something infernal
And use it as a lighter
Coz your magic's on par with a fighter
From the days of 3rd ed.
You heard what I said
Just rest down your head
This grave is your bed
Your thoughts turn to lead
So quickly you bled
Then you were dead
Your soul I am fed
Your mind I have read

You're nothing to me
You can't step to this
It's not rivalry
Your flow be weak like piss
We'll both be a standing at the end you see
Coz I'll be your liege, you'll pay me fealty
It's the best part of necromantic lore
Is that you'll just be another bitch begging me evermore

>>9530678
>while EPIC LEVEL COMMONERS FARM EPIC LEVEL CARROTS

Red you the hottest
Love the way you walk it
Brain so good an' so full a' knowedge
Minds can't deposit contents while on the topic
Cause everybody knows I ain't lying- if you got it
And you ain't never ever gotta go to the markets
Long as I got bags of holding in my pockets
5 6 ride with shoes and a saddle kit
You ain't gotta downgrade you can get what I get
My Hood can have what she want
You go in any store steal any loot you want
I notice you ain't ever had a Wolf like that
To loot you anything your heart desires like that
I want your body
Need your body
As long as you got me you don't need nobody
You want it I got it
Go get I'll loot it
Tell them other broke humans be quiet

>>9530773
That wolf took a big ass bite offa that song too.

Please say this has been archived...

>>9530804
>And while I'm rapping to the bass, Slaanesh wants to stick his dick in my ass.

>bass
>ass
>rapping to a fish

NPCS an PCs come scamperin out like a grot
cept feces and weak knees is all dat any of em brought
all dis arguing some call it high culture
but da orks is unified, swoopin like a desert vulture
pick ur bonez clean of all da bitz and pieces
gobble you up like a cutie swimmin in Reeses
da tau dink der clever, usin der dakka at range
too bad der fappin arm is da only part wif any aim
an when you meet a tau in person, deys all quiet and wif spouses
cuz da greater fail took der fightan spirit, swapped it wif barbie dollz an houses
so point ur devilyfish to da skies and tell Aun'el ur goin home
cause da Kor'Vattra got no dakka an da fire warriors load just got blown

Whoever was the OP had some shit lyrics.

>>9530853

Life is pretty harsh in the 40k year,
Lot of shit out there a nigga has to fear,
I just try to keep my head down,
While shit gets thrown around,
But it's tough to escape,
All of the flowin' hate.

Khorne wants to flood,
the planet with our blood,

Tzeentch got his dreams,
turn them into schemes,

Nurgle a fat bitch,
Gimmie a bad case of dick itch,

And while I'm rapping with class,
Slaanesh wants to stick his dick in my ass.

Life's shit out here at the Cadian Gate,
From the warp come lotta flowin' hate,
Me an' my homies got the numbers with guns,
And Commissars got our back - to make sure we don't run,

But no matter how hard they try, we'll never fade:
Abbaddon's had a failed 13th Crusade

>>9530678
When a guy like you insults me, it hurts a little on the inside
But because it's you I'll let it go; I would not have the last of /tg/'s honor die with it's pride
Maybe it's just my disposition, perhaps rappin's bad for my health, my singing might be bad enough to attract an angry swarm of dragon whelps
I loath to sound like shitty anime cliches; but honestly, haters always gonna hate, it just can't be helped

I love these threads.

Now I'm going to fuck you all up
and leave you to rod of wonder
All you can do is blunder
Or fail.
I roll 20's and my crits are off the scale.
2x, 3x, fuck no. I have a scythe multipler
But i'm no fucking liar.
When you see me fight you know I be dire.
My bite attack makes you a snack
You're just some loser that picked up a duck in a dungeon, cuz you heard it go quack.

>>9530168

You think you may be bad,
But Im older than yo dad,
Still as lively as a lad,
I be shakin' up this thread,
Like I do with the wenches in mah bed.

You best not mess with me,
Cause I can clearly see,
That you're no lady,
That's right, A lass is all I see,
No, no class is left in thee.
So don't you disrespect da P.

>>9530579

If you call that fair, you should at least understand
It takes ten thousand of you to equal this one man,
and should your grand offensive turn up shorthanded,
they're coming back empty handed-
-fuck that, disemboweled too, and de-brained,
not one less to face me, and you'll be feeling the pain.
And I'll salt the earth motherfucker, I'll wage total war,
annihilate you down to the very last spore,
and when my work is done, I'll wipe the blood from my sword,
keep the WAAAAAGH coming, I'm always hungry for more.

iamanirongolem
andiseemtohaveaproblem
ihavetokillfastandgiantfiststooslow
icantsingorspeakorcryitruinsmyshow
mybreathismadeofacidandmyassismadeofsteel
youcanhitmewithagalleybutthisbrothawontfeel
rippinlegsfromasseswithoutneedtorest
orpausetothinkorlookaroundcauseiamthebest
ohshitapittrap
whatnow
maybesomeonewillfallin
guesnot
wishicouldfly

BLOOD AND SKULLS
STEEL AND BONE
KHORNE IN DA HOUSE
SITTIN ON A BITCHIN THRONE
BERSERKERS, BLOODTHIRSTERS- MAIM KILL BURN!
I'LL MAKE FAILBADDON TO CADIA RETURN
I SLAUGHTER WHOLE SECTORS
I MAKE THE BLOOD RAIN
I DRIVE ALL YA FUCKIN' NAVIGATORS INSANE

WITH THE BOLT AND THE CHAIN
MY HORDES FORWARD PUSH
AND I PULL ALL THE STRINGS LIKE GEORGE W. BUSH

I'LL SEND KHARN TO YOUR PLANET
HE'S A FUCKING GREAT GUY
WHO WILL RIP AND TEAR YOUR ARMIES
KISS YOUR LIFE GOOD BYE

I'M IN CONTROL OF GALACTIC SLAUGHTER AND RAGE
INTRODUCING YOU TO THE NEW GRIMDARK AGE
WITH MY GAUNTLET OF IRON
AND HUGE DAEMONIC SWORD
I WILL CRUSH THE EMPIRE
AND BECOME YOUR OVERLORD!

>>9530933
omg I love it.

>>9530919

da orks go ta war wif more than da boyz
boyz are quite right, but I winz wif me toyz
me battlewagons pimped out, subwoofers an wreckin balls
drive by a mountain, make a landslide, name it Paladin Falls
stick da grots in killa kans march em to the front line
zookas and skorchas firin, der ballistic skill iz just fine
deff dreads wif street threads gonna tear u up, no question
you gonna need warforged parts to even hope for an erection

>>9530678
I've been unaligned like A Lich you all knew
Hell, I learned my first spell-rhymes from DJ Drew
But if you keep breaking the order of nature
And keep ending worlds, the gods will just hate ya
But haters gonna hate
So me and my mate
We'll chill and be late
And give the finger to fate

My bitches are fine, I won't have them rotting
Lamian girls I won't be boycotting
Just because they're a little my side of the grave
My just hoes be coming with their own FNP save.
Which is real good so they can take my manhood
They might be screaming again, but it's from pleasure not pain

You're resting on laurels
Throwing chat 'bout my morals
Sounding awful LG to this Master
I'm the greatest rhyme caster

If you want to keep stepping with me
You'll end up like Foreman after Muhammad Ali
You'll be lying flat out, as they count back from three
But you won't be there infinitely
Coz I got places commands for you to heed, posthumously

>>9530804
Delicious.

>>9530933
lol

I dont even like rap and I love this thread

>>9530919
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>>9530975

HEY! U LOT NOT PAYIN ATTENTION!

I sent da last chaos loser back wif his bags packin
Cuz his flow was right poor, face uglier than Straken
but I guess Abaddon never got along wif no Kharns
I 'sppose dats wat happens when u got no arms
Chaos fights itself erry day, all da times
makes ur crusades look muckkin, let alone ur sloppy rhymes
huge guts we got, yous just wastin ur time
to think u can krump an ork, tell ur gods goodbye

y'all don't know about my tight skills
fuck plate mail, I got hardcore quills.
when the wiz' fucked my biz' thought I might have to quit
but I hack, and I slash, hedgehog quest is legit.

>>9531111

I lol'd

>>9530975
Check it.

HERESY IS ALL I HEAR FROM YOU PUTRID LIPS

SMELLS WORSE THAN WHAT'S BETWEEN SLAANESH'S HIPS

YOU'RE A DICKLESS WONDER

"BLOOD AND THUNDER"

IS JUST A DISTRACTION

FROM YOUR NUMBA ONE BLUNDA:

YOUR LYRICS ARE WEAK,

WEAKER THAN A BITCH TAU

TIME TO FOR YOU TO BOW

TO THE EMPEROR'S THRONE

AIN'T MADE OF NO PUSSY ASS BONES

FOR THE GLORY OF IMPERIUM

I'LL SEND YOU TO THE CREMATORIUM

THIS PLANET GOT YOU ON IT?

TIME TO NUKE FROM ORBIT

>>9530933
>>9530975
There is no image macro to express how fucking awesome that was.

>>9530760

If you think you're right cause your rhymes are long,
Then let me enlighten you, you're DEAD wrong.
Sorry Holmes, pun intended, it's part of this flow.
If you've got trouble keeping up, it's cause you're too slow.
Oh,
That might be the spell I just cast on yo ass,
Don't give me that shit about necromantic gass.
Cause Im better than that,
No,
Even better than that.

I've been battlin' old corpses before you were born,
I've been rattlin' old bones before you were dead.
You best not confuse me for some greenhorn,
Rod Of Seven Parts coming in for yo head!
Now how about you be a sport, sport?
Just direct me to your hoard,
So I can leave this nasty place via teleport,
And live the rich life before I get bored.

That's a rich life, not a lich life.
Oh before I forget; I also boned your bony wife.

Fuck yeah I'm short but I'm a tour de force
Swordsdorf no remorse, so change ya' course!

Those raps are more muddled than my source code
Flowed uglier than a messy divorce load

Yourself a better emulator your own flow's a traitor
Like it was run twice through the babelfish translator

See ya later! Imma dig deep, put your pet cat to sleep
And eat his meat with a tasty side of cave wheat

Take a seat or retreat before I delete your ass
You'll have to cheat 'cus acid rain is the forecast

Snap, wait, no time to react
I've just implemented a blunt impact cracked

Your spine with a rhyme and a hammer in fact
It sublime the odds are stacked, get your bags packed

Retract your whack rap crap and go back to class
Before I reenact some Boatmurdered on your ass

>>9531228
YOUR CULT IS FALSE!
YOUR GENESEED IS WEAK
I WILL SHOOT YOU IN THE BALLS
AND CRUSH YOUR FUNNY BEAK

YOUR WORLDS WILL FALL, ONE BY ONE
BY THE END OF MILLENIUM IMPERIUM WILL BE GONE

HIVE OR FORGE WORLDS
I DO NOT FUCKING CARE
I WILL DROWN 'EM IN BLOOD
AND FUCK OLD EMPS WITH BOLTER!

RUN FOR THE HILLS
YOU ANGELS OF SHIT
FOR BLOOD GOD IS A' COMIN
SPACE GENOCIDE I WILL COMMIT

>>9531085

Necromaster's progressed so far rotten,
the living skin of a woman he's all but forgotten,
and his lamian wenches should be out picking cotton,
and you're misbegotten, I won't be your undead slave,
you don't even got what it takes to put me into a grave,
cast your spells, throw 'em all, watch me make my save,
while I swagger up right to 'ya and bust your face concave.
Your logic's depraved, you are not my equal,
You frontin' like you're DJ Phylactery: the sequel.
Necromaster is cannon fodder, and when the realization dawns,
I'll wipe the board clean of all your pawns;
you're too far foregone, can't compete with my brawn...

>>9531076

...and now here comes the ork with his weapons drawn.
You're talkin' big, little ork, but you're expressing a dichotomy,
there's just one of you and it'll take an army to stop me.
Who are you to talk, do you speak for the nation?
Or are ya' just one ork venting frustration?
But this is just oration, my questions are rhetorical,
I know that your WAAAGH ain't nothin' but metaphorical.

>>9531111

Fuck. I got nothing.

>>9531436

>My face when I read that.

>>9531111
Robo-skelly throw down a beat

>>9530452
I ain't rotting
My blood's not even clotting
I'm beyond just undead
Don't need to be fed
But I can eat a meal
From a nice piece of veal
To a soul won in a deal

You think you know freedom flying in the air
Try flying in the next lives, without a care
Visit paradise, then come back from there
Coz not even heaven has shit on my lair

Forget lightning rods, If I want to catch you
I'll break the earth, rend in clean in two
Move the air, wind and the sky, down into the gap
Close the world, with a finger snap
It's a breeze if you know the tricks
Just have to know how the world ticks
I'd do it for a kick
But I'm busy holding the mic
So you run if you like
But when I drop the mike
I can have you any time I please
You'll be down on your knees
But I'm fine with my hoes
Coz as everyone knows
Persiphone is as good as it goes

MC Necromaster running this joint.
Keep it incorp-real

>>9531368

dey humies is smart, dey use intelligents and reason
but all I can tells is dat its fighter huntin season
he makes me roight laugh, wonderin who is so special
asking if a warboss speaks for da warhost, wut are u, heretical?

ur right ta say dat we aint equal
da difference is u aint gettin no prequel
ur story's time is endin, ur contract is up
not even Drizzt can beat us, or entertain wif his fluff
so go back to wizzos and beg R.A. Salvatore
you frontin like a badass but yous just me quarry

Watch out, kiddies. Storm's movin' back in.

>>9531368
Alright MC S-an-B still layin' down the pain
Guess I was wrong when I thought you were plain
Now when it comes to magic I'm the best there ever was and ever will be
But I can't use a fuckin' magic sword even if I got it for free
Now S&B I hear your fightin' prowess at least matches your lyrics
Team with me, find a cleric, make a brand new posse
Ain't no hatin' from me no more no way
But Necromaster now we all agree is pretty fuckin' gay

So let's stick around put him down back in his place
Put his corpse back in its grave
Take the phylactery down to fuckin' Blood Mountain
Smash it up, burn it down, then all the record sales we'll be countin'.

>>9531509
>>9531471
... ... ... ... ... ...
... ... ... ...
... ... ... ... ... ... ...
... ... ... ... ...

... ...

*CONNECTION LOST: PHASE OUT CONFIRMED*

Drow in this house, bitch. 2010! Remix! Let's Go!

Yo, they hating one me because I got this sick beat
My flow is so tight it's putting matrons in heat
And ain't got time for all those surface haters
Why should I worry about those pale masterbaters

You won't see me comin', I'm a master of stealth
How else did you think I got all this wealth
And I'll give props where props are due
Stop grinning, motherfucker. I ain't talking about you

You see, my house is on fire. My house is for real
Killing you punks is a rerun, like Ally Mcbeal
And my kin are dead serious about this shit too
As soon as the spell goes off, it'll be too late for you

Haha!!

I keep my bitches in line with my cool cool swagger
Don't fuck with me, or I'll show you my +4 dagger
I run the Underdark, I'm the drow in charge
While you suck clit, I watch my money grow large

You can't compare, I'm a true blue drow
Don't bother asking, you'll never know
What it means to be killing out in the streets
Watching punk ass bitches die at your feet

Cuz you're a poser of the highest order
I'll fuck you up, and dump your ass on the border
Of the city, and your matron won't come to save ya
Cuz she'll be busy with me, the REAL DROW PLAYA!

Yo, check yourselves.

You bitches can atest, I'm the best, a cut above the rest.
With a punch and some kicks, i'll bloody you pricks.
I'll make your wives into my hos, when I hit 'em with an open hand Stone Fist Flurry of Blows.
No sword, no board, and no phylactery.
It's only fist, feet, and cloth armor for me.

Yo, dis is Prime,
Had a good time,
Hope you liked the way I rhyme.
You are all the best,
But now it's time for me to rest.

This thread is AMAZING. /tg/, you have made my day.

Is this archived?

>>9531524

Ain't no clerics I know that are down with my flow,
all preaching and hollerin', they all talk and no show.
But if it's a healer you be looking to collect,
MC Druid and Divine Justice got my respect,
but I'd expect if we're to form an epic hip hop crew,
there would only be one BBEG we could pursue:

DJ Phylactery of course, the best of the beast,
a foe not to be underestimated in the least.

This is harder than it looks
Maybe i should go back to reading my books

Er.. seriously this is hard

Wot'z dis now, goin' on in dis tread,
All you'z boyz bak up, I'ma break dis
'umies 'ead,

You'z don't know greenskinz, at all dis is troo,
So da boss frum Gork n mork, is about tew
edjucate you,

We WAAAGH, an We Bash, An we break
your Spess muhreenz, Da orkz is da best,
an you kno wut dat meenz,

All you'z 'umies ever do is look fur 'eretics,
get up off your rumpz and WAAAAGH like
DIS! We Gonna lite up da burnaz,
take da Choppaz to ur 'ead, give ur sisters
My power Klaw, yea, dat'z wut I sed,
So after we pillage, we loot dat'z troo,
Cuz the Deffskullz raped ur ass, bitchez
know dat dat's troo.

Sword n' Board is the master of /tg/ related rap battles, I ain't even gonna TRY to compete.

Seriously, you should put out an album, I'd buy it.

So how much of this is copypasta from the last rap-thread? Do we got some Sword'n'board up here?

>>9531861
none of it is copypasted.

maybe you should... uh... read the thread

>>9531819

It is on sup/tg/

>>9531861

Nothing that I know of.

>>9531861
I detect considerable amount of OC in this sector, cap'n.

>>9531908
Cap'n! There's far tew much rape in this thread! Teh Shields aren't able ta compensate with the sheer ammount 'a rape!

>>9531436
I don't be forgettin'
I won't be regrettin'
I be Omniscient
Infinite Wisdome and Int.
You think you can step
Sure you have a sweet rep
But you ain't nothing no more

You think you get a save?
In my lightning rave!?
It's not save or die
It's just drop like the bass
Then you still you will lie
Stretched out on your face

But if you get close enough to roll hand to hand
You'll see that you're easily out manned
Coz my swordfighting
Is deadly like lightning
And thrice as fast
Can't dodge in the past
I won't need to cast
To show you your last

I'm on first name terms with the reaper
She thinks I'm a keeper
But you'll come apart, like a rack tortured leaper

In a fight to the death, I'll win by attrition
Death can't take me, by her own admission
I don't have a body to slice, you'll find it a mission
To slice a soul with your sword, while the pain I'm a dishin'

>>9531264
You cast a slow, I cast a time stop
All the time I need to make your head drop

You think you've been around a while, kid
Ain't nothing with a lifespan that long
I predate the worlds first song
You've been aging and dying
While I've been nature defyin'
I'll send you home cryin'
If you think for a moment your fit to rhyme with me

Why have a hoard when I can summon riches at will
Via alchemy or rap skills, my purse I perpetually fill
I don't need magic items, I can artifice
Use an at will power, to make a +10/+10 sword to suffice
You can't teleport out of my lair
This world is MINE - yes, everywhere

>>9531838

OI YOU GIT! HAVENT YOUZ BEEN PAYIN ATTENSHUN?!

dis battle alredy haz lots ov orky love
da millionaire is warboss, mek, all of de above
youz makin big mistake, ur rhymes me eyes glaze
pickin foights wif humies wen ur dakka dont even blaze
wen orks pick da leaduh, wes 'spposed ta foight it out
so put ur mega armour on, an show me wut u got

/tg/ seriously does have the best posters in the world.

Dear god, I love all of you.

>>9531838

More orks crawlin' in, I can't even visit the crapper,
another brain-dead greenie flowing like Parappa,
but I'm the sapper to your sentry, the wrong human you've crossed,
I'll throw down with any ork and show 'em who's warboss.
I'll toss you aside, I'll topple your stompas,
tear apart your boyz like Luke flayin' wampas,
Ghazkull gone wrecked, missing half his brain,
his life ain't something that's long to sustain.

I came in the place with a magical bag of holding and a dex of 20, who the fuck wanted?

Check it.

From Aerenal to Khorvaire, my status as corsair
A brigand for sale, who is dirty like horse hair
I backstabbed my best friends, took the loot and pawned it
And I'm no stranger to scuffles, you want it, you got it
Cos your whole party stinks like a half-orc who farted
I'll throw thirty blows before you can say initiative
and I'll pistol whip the biggest click if I get pissed a little bit
I'm ducking's your rolls, dickin' your girl,
Cos like a peg-legg hooker, I put a stick in the whore
I never fail a stealth roll, go head and test me
It's vexing to spot check me in a dark room, you next, G
They call me rogue, level 20, the highest caliber
Just look at me wrong get ya whole melon smashed like Gallagher
I've got enchanted boots, a +10 to leap
I think you realise now, you got yourself in too deep
Cos we do it from behind and known to creep, sneak and cheat

>>9531945
Oi! Lissen up Git,
I'ma bout to tell youz,
I'm da ONLY Warbozz,
an you know dat's troo,

My Klawz tew sharp,
my Dakka's too explody,
you don' even have a choppa,
youz green skin phoney,

You callz yer self an ork,
You ain't green frum my view,
you'z a disgrace ta Gork an Mork,
I bet da 'umies made you.

So I'ma be here, juzt bidin my time,
I'ma kick ur 'umie butt, an den all
will be fine.

Necromaster, I swear I'm going to find you and shaky your hand.

>>9532029

another goofy humie wif a stoopid ass
why be good at roleplayin when u can copy Pluto Nash?
shiny knives an rings and cloaks are pretty neat
but nothin gonna save you when u feel it in ur feet
da rumble of nob bikers dat saw u from da high ground
u can crit a hide check fifty times a round
u can invoke plot armor and even go ta ground
buts it all for nought you Altair wannabee
cuz when ur choppas da biggest, dats all dat matters, u'll see

>>9531927

Good sir, before I leave I must congratulate you.
While I did my best to stay defiant, your evil rhymes bested mine.

>>9532029
>Cos like a peg-legg hooker, I put a stick in the whore
Okay, that was brilliant.

>>9532122
>good sir

Cut it out sergalfag I know it is you.

ALL YOU OTHER EMCEES BETTER GENUFLECT SON
GOT NINETY-NINE PROBLEMS AND A LICH AIN'T ONE?
NOW THAT I'M BACK, YOU CAN'T DO AS YOU PLEASE
Y'ALL IN MY CRYPT NOW, THE K-RIZZLE-DIZZLE
Y'ALL THINK YOU'RE A STORM, BUT YOU'RE ONLY A DRIZZLE

TRY AS YOU MIGHT, YOU'LL SOON LOSE THE FIGHT
AS MY EARTH SHAKIN' WORDS BID YOU ALL "GOOD NIGHT"

YOU CAN RHYME AND YOU CAN GLOWER
BUT WITH EACH FRESH VERSE YOU JUST GIVE ME MORE POWER

Y'ALLS PAWNS TO MY KING, MY PLAN 'KEIKAKU DOORI'
IF YOU KEEP HALF STEPPIN' THEN YOU'LL SOON BE SORRY

>>9531927
>You've been aging and dying
>While I've been nature defyin'

Necromaster confirmed for illest rhymesmith in the world.

>>9532039

Yous spend all ur teefs on +5 choppas of crits
but wut u really needed wuz a pain boy optometrist
bowin ta u is silly, Id hafta smoke lots of trees
silly like accepting Robby Gullimans as me spiritual liege
big loud noises are roight proppa, no doubt
but when u sound like runt, yous aint got no clout
put all ur duckies in order before you step to da mic
before I plow ur mum so hard she stops bein a dyke
Dey said in da codex dat u win all da missions
I guess dey meant in one'a dem older editions

I'd buy a /tg/ rap battle album. As long as it stayed /tg/ related and doesnt slip into too much flaming other MCs/rappers/whatevers.

I LOVE THIS THREAD

>>9532057
Cheers mate. Queensland might be a touch far, so instead I'll just point you towards a project I'm working on which needs more people.
http://arthropocalypse.forum-motion.com/general-f5/starter-thread-new-to-arthropocalypse-t17.htm

I'm Quest Lord there and here also. But back to the rapping.

>>9532029
Stealth won't be no good vs Area of Effect: Global
Coz I don't care about collateral damage, I make you look noble
My crew might all be dead like yours
But the difference is, that mine don't pause
They're still rolling with me
Like Death Knight Boney MC
You say that you're a rouge that's hit 20
But I'm past levels, you're behind by plenty
Because you might need a dark room to hide
But I cast Flawless Invisibility, on me and my ride
I can do anything you can, but better
Theft?
Summon Object
Assassination?
A spell of defenestration.

You are piss weak like your rhymes
You're unsteady like your beat
Get with the times
Out of here, you're beat.

Internet at its finest.

Bah.
I'm so late.
Contributin' up.
(deleted last post. the end needed some clearing up)

You think you guys rule,
you ain't got nothing on me,
I ain't got no swords, no magic, or phylactery,
i've fought elder gods with nothing but a gun,
a thick book, my brains and feet trained to run.

Cthulu'd made you mad,
force you all to take san check,
take 1d5, fuck your head and infect,
fuck. you rolled non-euclidian dice,
your brain just exploded not once, but twice.

No warrior can defeat him,
he's squamous and rugose!
Your gods won't help you,
you'll be white like a ghost,
when you see the abominations,
no one can ignore 'em,
you'll claw your eyes out,
just to not see 'em.
I survived cult meetings and asylums.
you think your so high, with your powers and levels,
Fuck. You ain't got nothing on me.
try defeating gods with only your tenacity.

Ph'nglui mglw'nafh, Cthulhu R'lyeh, wgah'nagl fhtagn,
it'd be the last thing you hear,
you just gotta fear the eldritch power of the octopus-dragon.

>>9532246
I'd pay for that album. Even if it way just Phylactory and Sword'n'Board, or maybe Divine Justice.

>>9532194
Alright now I'm ticked, you've spit your last rap
I've here to deliver vengeance on K-RYPT so I'm here to shut your trap
I was just a simple man, nothing bound to my name
Till one day a lich showed up and razed my home with his flames
I'm not looking for the loot, you can keep the EXP
But undead are all mine, leave their skulls to me
You see this hate of mine has festered from years of abuse
And when I finally caught my nemesis, his ass flew the coop
But hark, what is this that mine eyes see
It's the instigator of my pain, time for a murdering spree
I was always down on luck, never had any fancy things
But you undead took all I had, hope it was worth the doom I bring
You assholes want a battle? I can make it happen
MAXIMUM FUCK ENGAGED, FULL SPEED AHEAD, CAP'N

>>9531927

Necromaster's namesake, he just keeps coming back,
now I'm targeting your phylactery with my attack,
your flow's whack, but it's better than most,
more than I'd expect to fly out of a ghost,
but the host of your soul I will soon reclaim,
you've fanned my rage into a roaring flame,
and while you proclaim, to be evil's root;
I've got a position for you, and it's UNDER MY BOOT
My strikes are acute, being incorporeal won't save you,
my ghost-touched sword will still find and slay you,
I'll destroy you completely and the gods you pray to,
death won't stop me, my spirit will still break through,
I won't be subdued, and in the wake of my storm,
my boy Kord will return me to my original form.

>>9532326
I....I don't know what that is.

And, Australia isn't that far. I can swim there from New York City, I think.

The harbringer of doom, oh yes its Kalarel
I'll murder you and send your soul to the Shadowfell
Power of almighty Orcus, flowing like love so divine
Frontin with a mage so sublime should be a felony crime

When you start an edition war, you play into my hands
I'll split the party and make you fight warforged warbands
You'll fail your saving throw against my magical verse
I'll send you to the Far Realm in Lovecraft's hearse

I custom fit my wands with the skulls of the deceased
The DM loves me so much my page is beyond creased
I send dragonborn rogues back to school
I make heroes take cues like chumps who play pool

So when you need a tale, most badass and true
Remember Kalarel, because I won't forget you.

Hittin' the beats like a beset Beowulf
this here viking gonna teach ya tha' gulf
'tween peasants' an' pissed pirates' asses
heck we both, don' bother boring with classes

Glidin' in with our ships to the shore, sure to beat
any foofin fool who tries to remake our feat
Hel herself wouldn't hear or have us
We fight them 'til we die, then we get on that bus
Valhalla's Valkyries gettin' us to be Odin's Vassals
Hardcore defendin' 'gainst horrible hordes assaultin' Aesgard castles

Driftin' by ya self at sea, sharks seeking to eat ya?
should'a joined us, we killing jorm's an' jotuns easah
Grendel's momma wish she made a meal outta our crew
you ain't gonna need no backup when a Nordic viking's with you

>>9532384
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH DAAAAAAMN

>You'll fail your saving throw against my magical verse
>I'll send you to the Far Realm in Lovecraft's hear

So you say I ain't real
Well here's the deal
I'm a Squat, a space dwarf
Ain't been eaten by any wanna be xenomorph
GW, they try to keep me down
But you can't treat me like no clown
I'mma gonna come back
Go on the attack
Demiurg, respresentin' on our behalf?
Bitch please, don't make me laugh
They be hangin' with dem pussy blue skins
We can't forgive those sins

So before you be saying we don't exist
Make sure a Squat ain't comin' at ya all pisse-

When they see me off in battle they say Horus on some other shit
Send them pussy bitches runnin straight back to their flagship
Me? I'm in the space Hulk
That's right I work for Chaos
Warmaster not a fraud
Call that bitch my bodyguard!
(call that bitch your bodyguard?)
yeah Abaddon is my bodyguard
Wear a lot of jewelry
Despoiler on security
What's whiter than a napkin
Harder than carapace
Luna Wolves Ceramite
Bolts flying at you super straight
Laid low by a stabbin so I'm worshippin' the points of eight
These traitor legions love me this heresy's goin great
Come hang out at the drop site, I'll use Fulgrim as some super Bait

>This thread

SWORD AND BOARD, YOUR WORDS ARE ABSURD

>>9532384

>>9532423
OM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM

>>9532026

Oh yeah, we're all shocked by your schlock
Grippin' that sword like it's the GM's cock

I bet this motherfuckin' sucker is frontin'
The way he acts you'd think he was compensating for somethin'

(speaking of which)

While your were busy naval gazing at your washboard abs
I was off adventuring in your girlfriend's ass

Don't even try, I'll explode and blow you sky high
You're plan is awry and the apocalypse is nigh

I'm three feet high, hard as iron with an ample supply
Of rhymes whereby I force a motherfucker to comply

Dumb faggot, I can mine at light speed through agate
Like a wood elf's balls, your weak flow is full of maggots

Like a magma forge this Dorf is too hot to handle
Soon enough SnB will be a doping scandle

So if you want a quest, equip yourself a silly dress
And save yourself princess; you don't posses the skills your profess

>>9532442

Sit down son,
Your war ain't won,
And while you are putting out lyrics,
My mind can bend even physics.
I am the first, and the best,
You and chaos won't stand up to the test.

I am disappointed in you thats for sure,
and while now you think you can take me,
I will kick your ass down to the floor,
And show you I regret making thee.

Come to papa boy and you will see,
The wrath of the Emperor in all its glory.
You will be but a story.

none of you are the least bit legit
even i cant find any pleasure in it
go back home with yo weak ass shit
your rhymes are painful you must admit

slaanesh in this bitch reppin and rapin the chickies
you think youre a man jsut cuz you aint got titties
i got news for your crews when youre bound and bruised
my dicks so big itll go right through

i got massive underground size and my nipples got eyes
the foundations of reality my rhymes deny
giv me your skin so i can get within
admit it, you aint gonna win

I... I need to draw this.

I'm the shortest thing in WoW
that isn't gay or a sow
I make Stormwind fear, doubt the crown
knock you out with a shovel, in a river you'll drown
can't level off of me past 2
I'll kidnap your kids, feed 'em to a grue
your crops ruined, your daughters pregnant
I guess the Light never taught what rape meant
I cause it all, make the Horde say "s'up"
Hit me all you want, I always get up
step off forever, my rhymes you can't handle
bitch please for real, you no take candle

I feel like there's still loyal that owe me knecks
I feel like there's daemonette's that owe me sex
I killed the only bro in the world that know me best

I got the legion and the fame, man that don't mean shit
I got the Aquila on a chain man that don't mean shit
Cause cleansing Xenos, can't bring me peace yo
I need just at least a couple noise marines oooohhh

Oh, I'm all heretical
but Horus sure knows how to ball
I know bros frontin like they knew he was low
they damn Horus brother you don't know us no more

You got that warmaster honoree
and you just changed on me
You can ask rowboaty how the top's so lonely
ai-ai-ai- aiiiiiiieeeeeee

my my looks like ya'll simps think you got game. I am game. Check it.

You think you got skrilla
its time to get realla
I own the world you live in
You only have because I was given

You think you have arcane might?
To bad that I could smash it in a night.
You think you think you can beat because your faith is strong
I'm your gods god so I guess that makes you wrong

I am the alpha and the omega
I'm the boss I'm the head nigga
You better offer me something you silly hos
like some mountain dew, pepsi, and some cheetohs

you want to one shot a boss?
well thats your loss
you wanna know why you can't beat it?
NIGGA GM FIAT

Hey, just saying, this was fun stuff, but I'm about all-rapped out. My knowledge of /tg/-related topics is pretty much spent. Loving reading what everyone else is putting out though. Keep at it.

Cheers everyone, stormbitch out.

BEERBARIAN HERE
WHILE YOU BITCH AND SQUEAL
I FUCKED THROUGH THE ROOF
CUZ SHIT JUST GOT REAL

I RAPE AND I PILLAGE
DESTROY EVERY VILLAGE
UPPING MY KILLAGE
FO THE SAKE OF XP

ADAMANTIUM AXE
SPLITTING YO THORAX
HELPIN YOU REALIZE YO
ERRA IN DISSIN ME

CONDOMS FROM HEXTOR
BITCHES CUNTS GET SORE
SUFFERIN THE PUMMELIN
WHILE SCREAMIN FO "MORE!"

FROM HIGHLANDS TO SWAMPS
I CUT THROUGH MA FOES
BRINGING BLOODY CONCLUSIONS
TO EACH OF MY DUNGEON ROMPS

SKULLED MUTHA FUCKA,
BEHIND YO CANTRIPS AND POTIONS
YOU JUST ANOTHA BITCH
HOPIN FO" LOTION
TO EASE THE PAIN OF THAT ANAL SORE
YOU GOT FROM DISSIN WITH FUCKING PELOR.

SHIT I CAN'T READ AND I KNOW THAT SHIT
"DONT FUCK WIT PELOR, UNLESS U LEGIT"
SPEAKIN OF WHICH, I GOTTA GO! LATER!
TO RECLAIM MY THRONE AS:

BEERBARIAN GODSLAYER!

>>9532546

They call you master
but I'm faster
Savior of mankind my ass yo'
you lied to me
and went into hiding
Far away on Terra on your golden seat
they say heresy
but they can't compete
I'M THE WARMASTER BITCH TAKE A KNEE
Mars fights with me
and it's plain to see
of all mankind WHO'S YOUR DADDY??!?!?!?

>this thread

>THORAX
Them fucking trilobites, man them fucking trilobites...

>>9532384
I'm no Litch,
No phylactory's bitch
Just a man who lost his mortality
And made a new reality

Did I make you mad?
Or a little bit sad?
Do your loved ones now serve me?
Is that why you try to unnerve me?
In your lyrical futility
to undermine my ability
I'm not evil's root, Evil's just a branch on my tree
Alignment is just a part of what I see
Just like I don't prey to no Deity
In fact, a few of them worship me
But you flow well for mortal of not even a century
I'll keep you on as a rhyme spitting lackey

But it's time for this Masta to bail
Let sup/tg/ bards scribe this epic tale.

MC Necromance out but not down
Leaving this thread to the mortals yo.

Yo yo yo

Niv-Mizzay over here, overflowing with rhymes
All you liches and bitches must prepare for demise
Recognize, and you will bow down to the draconic kind
Just look at me, and you'll burn within this fiery mind

I'm a planeswalker, plain spoken, my excellence
Is resplendent, fuckin' stupendous exceeding your intellects,
You're not worthy of a footnote in my history,
Just drop down on your knees and feel the Mizzary.

Eldest being in the world, I be the number one
You wanna tap me? Go ahead and try it, son
From libraries to the graveyard, I keep dropping the beats
Flyin' high above the cobblestones of the Ravnica streets
So get out your notebooks and prepare to learn
I'll school you so hard you'll die from old mana burn

Yeah

Knockin through the town
ain't nothing hold me down
headin straight for the castle
kill the king, it's my crown

I make the children cry
ain't no one can deny
eat their parents up fresh
no need to cook or fry

don't bother to ask how,
the new law is whatever I allow,
take at a look at my trail
and let me take a bow

ain't got no time for pain,
no time to complain
the way I walk the hall
the way I rip the wall
just watch the cities fall
before my might.
send everyone, screaming
make you wish you were dreaming
my carapace is gleaming
in the sunlight

I have
100%, the wrath that you dread
the claws that shred
the teeth, the reason that you bled
murder everyone for a sea of red
leave a trail of carnage
in my stead
in my tread
view of pure destruction in my head
so take the word and spread
I'll drink the tears you shed
off the fear i've fed
ain't nothing short of a miracle
that can hold me dead
so take whatever instead
Tarrasque Mother Fuckers
That's what she said

...
A thousand zeroes,
no talent to see.
Not even auspex can show clarity,
no sense of rythm nor style with rhyme,
a million fishies, wasted away in time.
A dagger impaled upon plank of wood,
several rattling bones,
twopenny spells, fungus that smells,
nothing that's really that good.

>>9532531

DEM DORFS MAN, DEM FUKKIN' DORFS

You dorfs best stick to hiding in your fortress.
Cuz you don't want none of this.

When the dorfs rush the fight, I do nothin' but laugh,
a simple sword swipe separates wheat from chaff.
On behalf of taller races, I extend an invitation,
you dorfs got the short end of the stick in terms of creation,
and it don't break my concentration,
your rhymes don't rattle my nerves,
cuz the ugliest human bitch has sexier curves,
than a dwarf woman, sportin' hair like a mandrill,
now I know why all you dorfs would rather pound anvils.

Your kind are amusing, my curiosity is never slaked,
cuz, there ain't nothin funnier than dorfs mining up through a lake,
And at least I'll never get killed by an earthquake,
and while I'm still awake, I'll show you some courtesy,
you can keep my girl, that's my idea of mercy.
They're dime-a-dozen, so I don't really hold them dear,
but its the finest pussy you'll ever come near.

>>9531650
Straight outta Menzo! I tell you, drow, I don't play
Wanna know what I do to a drow that lost his way
I ain't got time for the drama, the lectures
A wimp steps up to me and walks away with fractures

I got a mace just for that purpose
Any faggot who goes to the surface, he deserts us
And there are a thousand posers playing like that
But there'll be none left standing in the aftermath

And if I meet that prancing Mary-Sue
Motherfucker, I'll tell you what am gonna do
Nine inches of steel, magically enchanted
Killing him quickly, don't care if he fights two handed

Cuz I'm not playing with a knife in my hand
Ten seconds of his ass is all I can stand

Fuck, fuck the Drizzt!
Fuck him, fuck him
Fuck the Drizzt! Yaaa

We're expert killers, no one's a philosphizer
When people see us coming, they be making fertilizer
And Do'Urden will to, we gonna make it be seen
That you don't run away from the Spider Queen

We ain't the heros, but we be in charge
Find where he is hiding, and in we barge
And fire our crossbows, click click click
And every bolt, into his body, they'll stick stick stick

Haha!! We're hard like that
Last thing Drizzt'll hear is us killing his cat
Blasting away, as we ride by
Grinning as we watch his punk ass die

And we don't care who backs him up
Just more people in who're gonna get fucked up
But maybe we'll let him slide
Just long enough to watch us all give his girl a ride.

Fuck, fuck the Drizzt!
Fuck him, fuck him
Fuck, fuck the Drizzt!
Fuck him, fuck him
Fuck the Drizzt!!

>>9532805
YOUR RHYMES ARE STILL STINK LIKE ROTTEN CURD
YOU TWO BIT NERD TURD

I...
Love...
These...
Rap...
Battles...

>>9532805
You... you are a king among men. I need to make you an avatar...

>>9532710

You fail me again, it should have been plain,
That my reasons are my own,
You are my son, and you have no room to complain,
For one I made you Warmaster boy, take that,
You are nothing compared to me brat.

I was working on something amazing,
I expected you to understand I was not lazing,
Dreaming of being a God is not how I roll,
And now for your treachery it is for you who the bell tolls.

Listen to me Horus,
There is no reason for disagreement among us,
Listen to reason, listen to me,
It is you who lied to me, you who betrayed me,
I was working on mankind's destiny.

>>9532710
Horus, you whiny bitch
Actin' hard? Man that's rich.
You ain't got nothin' on me, bro
You've reached a new low
Being a puppet to some crazy shit
Well I'll do my bit
You're a primarch, a big fucker
Yet you fall to these lies like a real sucker
You got equipment supreme
But you'll take over the Imperium only in dream
You shit's going down
You'll never wear the crown
Because you ain't nothin' but a spoilt brat
And your ass has to be knocked flat
You think you can't be touched with that power divine?
Well fuck you shit, I'm going to hold the line.

>>9532832

;_;

>>9532877

YOU TELL THAT SONOVABITCH!

>>9532833

then why you sage?

>>9532877

Pius,
You are indeed righteous,

While my lyrics are stale,
In times to come your tale,
Will never be lost,
When you gave me time,
To grind Horus to dust.

>>9532877
hell ya!

>>9532877

goddamn!

I love this thread
so much

there are no words

Now wait you all one damn minute
you think I'm gonna sit back with my mouth on mute?

WHATS - MY - NAME???
you all better know this round these parts
Or I'll have a little furry girl rip out your heart

LE - MAN - RUSS
and none of y'all go forgetting
or that line on your palm says the clocks ticking

I know you've all heard of a guy named Guilieman
Spiritual Liege with the master plan
Codex writer and battle fighter
Trapped in stasis with his throat getting wider
Says we all need to follow his rules
but vegetable man needs to hold back his drool
when it comes to chapter orgs. regs. and what
I say the smurf can put it in his butt
We've been a legion since before you can remember
And who turned Prospero into a cinder?
Who's off in the Eye findin them apples
to make the Emperor some magic snapple
13th company's got my back
and all you heretics...can lick my sack
I'm all hairy with some wicked fangs
but guess how many bitches this furry bangs
I'm a wolf in wolf's clothing
who ain't in stasis molding
and who'll be there for the wolf time bitch, strait rollin'

howl at your boy!!!

>>9532959
There are but two words:

Nerd turd.

>>9532877
>>9532861

Whoa whoa
Just who do you think you're talking to?
I'm WARMASTER motherfucker get a clue
Emps I'll slap you like a bitch
With this lightning claw here, got it as a gift
But Pious I won't give you time of day
Half-cocked midget whose supposed to be a saint
Better climb aboard your safe secure ark
The only power you got is you glow in the dark

But as for the Emperor
And these lies he calls truths
As far as I'm concerned there's only room
For one at the top of Humanity's list
Don't believe me? Check with Sanguinious
Oops my bad, he's my new rug
So much for drinking all that blood
But can we make this quick, can we hurry?
I got a date with four friends, and immortality

Bitch you best be scared
you and me just got paired
level 1 kobold
run away, maybe i'll let yo ass be spared

Ima gut yo selves on just your first adventure
you'll find messin with me to be a risky venture
i'll make your blood my personal thirst quencher
i'll take your girl, sit your ass back on the bench, her
and I got a date for tonight
after this one-sided fight
as her and I lower the light
forget you as we get tight, together

your legacy
is gonna be
short lived
and no one gonna see
what you could have been
should have been
in 20 levels the slayer of sin
it's a shame, it's come to such a short end
good bye friend
roll up a new character, get your mistakes to mend
this life's over buddy
my rhymes extend
I hope you comprehend
This is how the last minutes of your life you'll spend
don't need to pretend
I mean to condescend
you know just what I intend
you're death does impend

>>9533146


Talking pretty big for somoene who I grew from a spot on my back,
I need to take you down a peg or two you freak,
and make you see that compared to me, you are weak.
There ain't no stopping the Big E,
I have no time for those who turn their back on me.
My flame sword will turn you aside,
You see, I am supreme,
Pious is on the number one team,
You can't turn back my Imperial tide.
Chaos is nothing but shit,
To fall for them means you ain't legit,
The only immortality that awaits you,
Is that of tales of how I kicked your sorry ass.

>>9529254
>>9531861

idiots don't realize that there are SEVEN rap threads now archived.

And every single one of them is original content. No copypasta in any of them.

/tg/ I love you.

>>9533286

Here's a little something from a God to a slave,
I never should of been let out the fucking microwave!
We're on this planet and we're running a muck,
I should give a shit but I don't give a fuck!
Ever since I was a scumdog, I blew a cum-wad.
I need a mother-fucking suckadickalickalog!
Burning a mall or two, blowing the load I spew.
You don't wanna fucking fuck me? I'll Fuck you!
This is your ass, and I'm in it.
My man Sexy will fuck you up in a minute.
With an axe, sword, mace, pike your limbless.
Then I'll fuck your ass till its rimless!

Chorus:
Oh! You humans always screaming!
Oh! As you suckle on my semen!
Oh! And the shit is always steamin'
A drunk, a pervert, a junkie and a womanizer.
But you can call me the salaminizer
I NEED MORE! I NEED MORE! I NEED MORE!
Give unto give unto give unto give unto

My life is a luxury, so filled with hate.
I got fifty slaves heaping maggots on my plate.
From my fortress in Antarctica I watch the world die
On my Sony Trinitron that's switched to channel 5.
Back on the road, its no lie....
Stupid fucking humans pay money to die!
Crushed in the pit, nailed to the stage
I only suck the souls that are underage.

>>9533333

also check out those cincos.

>>9533334
I love GWAR but why you quoting The Salaminizer in a OC rap thread?

ALL YOU LITTLE PUNKS SEEM TO THINK YOU KNOW
a THING OR THREE FOR RUNNING THE SHOW
BUT IM A REAL ENTERTAINER
NOT JUST A GREAT PRETENDER
AND WHILE ILL BOP IT IN THE BACK
YOU FAGS CAN LICK MY SACK
'COS IVE BEEN TO THE TOP OF YOUR SILLY LITTLE GAME
IVE SEEN ALL THERE IS AND YOU ALL LOOK PRETTY LAME
SO PRACTICE YOUR RYHMES AND HANDLE YOUR LOOKS
'COS THE MAN THAT TAKES MY TITTLE GOT TO BE A SUPER GOOD CROOK
AND YOUR NOWHERE NEAR, NOWAY, NOHOW
SO SLIP TO YOUR KNEES AND BOW BITCHES BOW

>>9533146
You think I'll let you ruin humanity?
You best stop with the insanity
You want to get to big E?
You'll have to go through me
You think you're tough shit
But what you won't admit
While you have a body of a god
You're still a clod
You can't understand
Why I make my stand
While when you're a god and I'm a man
This shit, it ain't going to plan
I'll tell you why
Even though I'll die
I'll fight you, traitor
You Imperium hater
Well here, I'll give you some understanding
I don't mind if I die standing
Because so long as humanity keeps burning on
I don't mind if I'm gone
Because you'll fail, you'll lose
And while this may confuse, this truth you may refuse
Because even when my death is long foregone
In the Imperium I save, I'll live on.

Bitches acting like they tough
Thinkin shitty swords and oak shields be enough
But now the Mike I wields and my artillery on the fields
You see gods I see bitches
You burn I feel iches
Angels and Demons screaming my name
With my guns you better learn to play the game
I'm advancing you think it's all the same
I'm amazing
You're so lame
And so I proclaim
Stop your god praising
We're amazing
Dimension Phasing
Hell and Heaven Raising
Ignoring hell hazing

Yaweh kicked your ass now we're kickin his
We're rolling tanks like the Masters of the Biz
Didn't know Artillery Strike
Gave you a pop Quiz

Salvation War we're winning
Motherfuckers this is only the beginning.

Who's that? OH SHIT, EVERSOR!
That's right, bitch!

Closing in at the speed of sound
Blood red eyes, fueled by rage unbound
High on promethium, unstoppable force
I will take your head, no matter the cost!

Yelling WRYYYY as I slaughter my way through
Can you hear the screams? I'm coming for you!
I'll stab you with the neuro gauntlet right in your face
Then I'll set off big nuke in the center of your base

I'm assassin extraordiniare, without a doubt
You've got a problem with the Imperium? I'll tear your guts out
So beware all you heretics and renegade scum
When the time comes, down your throat my sword I will jam

>>9533286

For a supreme being you sure find it hard to rhyme
Your vocabulary stunted away from the front line?
You know it's okay to be afraid of me
Yeah your number one son started the Heresy
Would you rather it be Russ?
Some heretical yiffin'?
or maybe you'd want Roboute
thinking he's big pimpin'
You know what it doesn't matter
you've had your turn
You didn't cut it
Now watch the Galaxy Burn
I remember on Ullanor
After the big Parade
you said "you're warmaster Horus
Now go and play"
and play I did
but now I'm back again
to claim my right of Sovereign
Mankind needs a leader that's stronger
Not a baby-back bitch in golden armor!

>>9533478

>>9533478
HOLY FUCK
GLORIOUS

>>9533550

Shit, son,
I can't believe how I won,
Saving mankind and leading it to victory,
Rather than making lyrical history,
Pius beat your ass though,
Can't deny,
As a saint he will keep on being fly.

(I tried being the Big E, and this is my first time rapping, I just had to get in on this /tg/, despite being an amateur. I just wanted to at least try for the Emperor)

>>9533478
>>9533515

Boys why we gotta fight
Fuck yeah humanity lets unite
Daemon bitches think they can fight
Watch these barrels light up, ignite

Navigators, Nephilim plot the course
Swinging through the 'verse as one invincible force
Knocking evil at the source
Don't make us get coarse

Guardsman meet the OG Marines
We don't fuck around with genes
All camo'd up in greens
Busting up with the master machines

Demons shut the fuck up
Whining like a bunch of pups
You see infernal castles
I see highways
Don't bitch, it's gonna go my way

Yes we dare
Lich bitch can't compare
We'll kick your ass no matter who what and where
Quit bitching like somehow we should care
Human forces now a pair

HUMANITY

FUCK YEAR

This thread has left me a drooling, burnt-out husk of a man.

The awesome has burned the eyes from my head, and my brain is a sloshing pink liquid inside my skull.

I love you so god damned much, /tg/.

I got no rhymes
but I'll keep drawin' these if I got the times.

>>9533877

Cool, nice work man.

>>9533877

Holy shit. Thank you so much, that's awesome.

>>9533948
Heh, no thank you for the entertainment. And thank whoever keeps posting that top pic, it's a sure fire way to grab my attention. I still feel like doing another DJ Phylactery someday.

Fuck, I wish I could come up with this stuff.

>>9533962

I'm gonna avatarfag with your pic from now on. Time to retire the other one.

Were you the anon that drew the original pic in op's post? If so, you're a fucking hero.

I now imagine the entire Horus confrontation in rap form.

This is /tg/ canon now.

>>9534068
Yep. This has been an entertaining series and if I can find the time and I see the threads, I'll try and get more avatars out there for people who bust out some really inspired stuff.

>>9533286

Your a corpse on a throne, nice try
But this a truth that you can no longer deny
While you rot on your throne my master's out for a ride
All you kiddo's best run and hide
Cuz' he is ridin with the mothafuckin' doom rider
In human skin that has never been tighter
So you and your empire stay outta the way
As me and my brotha's prepare for the day
That Slaanesh busts in and takes your crown
While we take terra for a night on the town

Yoyoyo

Check it dawgs, this open mic thread is done, and I think we need to crown a winner. So whatchall think the winner is?

>>9534241
I vote for Necromaster

>>9534241
Seconded. Sn'B is a balla' for sure, but I think Necromizzle rocked this shizzle, my nizzle.

>>9534241
Necromaster, Sword N' Board or the guy who wrote the Pius stuff.

>>9534175

"A night on the town" Don't make me sick
When the imperium busts in you know you shit bricks
When we'll be done you'll be food for the crows you Slaneeshi prick
We know you only serve the tranny princess to make up for the micro sized dick
He holds you close because he's the only one that lets your ugly ass lick
Go the fuck home you now our prose is sick

Don't cry don't whine
You die we fly watch the navy fly
You lost so hard we bet you didn't try
Don't lie don't pretend you didn't die

Unlike the emprah, humanities hero
You're wallowing in the warp like the god damned Zero
We know you are
Hide away far
We're going star to star
*blam*
Your brains Ajar

So don't pretend
You're gonna end
You can't pretend
We'll hit you with a virus bomb as a message to send
We wanna know

Will it blend?

>>9534241
/tg/ wins, nuff said

>>9534358

This.

/tg/ wins whenever awesome original content is posted. Everyone who contributed wins for posting epic shit. Pat yourselves on the back, job well done.

Having no lyrical or creative ability at all, this is really all I have to contribute to this thread.

>>9534322

Don't be actin' like we're the ones hidin'
Your the one on the throne, his time bidin'
While you send out your guard boys
Our followers make them our toys
And your commissars are the greatest sham
You only put them out to hear that (BLAM!)

So I got a bone to pick with you and your crew
That includes all your dickless spess mehreens too
You all don't know how to have a good time
So all we hear at the Eye is your constant whine
of "heresy", well I say we had enough
I got a challenge if you think your so tough
come down to the eye and we'll have ourselves a dance
Just pussy out now, you dont stand a chance

...

...

...!

..., ...

..., ...!

.............!

>:|

>>9534508

Learn the words.

>>9533877

What's that on your legs? Some fucking elves?
I'll take a real woman, leave those dolls on the shelves.
That's fucking pathetic, you think your rhymes are poetic?
Nigga please, the women want someone who's more than energetic
But a real man, with a giant fucking dick
Not your tiny little baby floppy saggy puny prick.

I'm the real deal, sucka, not some fighter or shit,
I'm a fucking OGRE and fuck I can take a hit
And never fall, motherfucker, never see me even falter
As I hit you with my club and your face permanently alter.
I'll grind your bones to make my bread,
And I'll do it when you're screaming, bitch, you won't even be dead,
Just a bloodied little torso lying bleeding on the floor,
And when you're beggin' and you're screamin' for the pain to be no more,
I'll just laugh with wicked glee, slam another tank of ale,
And all your puny bitches will see just how bad you fail.
What? You wanna go? Wanna take it up a notch?
Come on, Sword and Board, come on and show me what you GOT!

>>9534477

Bitch if you want the game get your own fighters
There's a reason we got ALL the writers
You got no soul you got no skill
Stealing Marines like lyrics for shitty apeal
We rap legends you rip it to a shitty speal
So realise you're shit and over keel

You think you're so great
Writing over a blank slate
We make marines you make Nothing
So fucking acting
Quit fucking angling
Quit your plagarizing, your assimilation, your averting

Making shit from shit thoughts
Scraping the bottom of Space Marine barrels
You know are rhymes are taut
When we're singing the emperors carols
Quit thinking the good shit can be bought

It's made
It's played
It's Laid
We've prayed
We've paid
Through your sit we'll wade
Until finally

You fade

>>9534430
Fuck yeah!

>>9534695
Bitch you ain't got nothin on me
I'll tear your limbs off and make you see
Now the tarrasque's in town, bitch get on your knees
you're puny muscle to me, it's like a flea

I'll rip you in half, decimate your puny self
I'll fuck your poor widow, put her back on the shelf
Just as tasty to my stomach as a puny elf
Ain't no one higher than myself

CR20 better get me respect
else you'll wind up gettin' wrecked
I'm busting out my damage direct
I'm here for my title as king to collect

this is your last chance to run
better haul ass son
you'll see that you've been outdone
be sorry for what you've begun

>>9534695

I ain't Tordek motherfucker, you ain't gonna punk me like that,
I've cussed fire with dragons big enough to roll you flat,
You've spat your last words, don't rely on yo' size mod,
and a grapple won't topple me cuz' I'm rockin' a tripod.
Who's your god, motherfucker? Tell 'em I send my regards,
I've filled the hells with scores of your kind of retards,
and the bards will all sing, of the ogres I've slain,
and you ain't got the brain,
I can see that you're fuming,
with an int score so low it'd straight-up kill a human,
and your bitches will be mine once I rend your ass asunder,
they'll need to use magic device to stroke my rod of wonder.

>>9534820

What a charming notion, but you've been defeated
Thinking your all that, this battle's gettin' heated
Your hymns go unanswered, your prayers as well
You'll soon serve Slaanesh at his home in hell
As for what we make, you cant even fake
the lie, we alter your boys to serve us in the Eye
Playin' riffs on their guitars make your brain matter leak
Our fighters are superior, yours be weak

And dont even think the Big E
Can take the time to hear or even see
The asswhoopin I'm bringin' down on y'all
The only move you can make is to stall
Checkmate bitch, that goes for your empire too

The Eye is here, and you all are through
Takin over the joint, havin' a party with you know who
Bringin' Horus and Kharn
man what a great a guy
We gonna have a party
While the empire fries

>>9535015
awwww snap, dawg!

And then the Clerics of Funk declare a halfling acappella group the winners.

Water, fire, air and dirt.
Fuckin' magnets, how do they work? And I don't want to talk to a scientist, y'all mothafuckers lyin', and getting me pissed!

>>9535149
Is too.

>>9535018

Slaneesh ain't nothing but a fatass tranny
Forces fighting so weak they wouldn't challange my granny
Sucking so hard It's freaking uncanny
All you got is perverts
Lunging like they hot at anything with skirts
When you roll in town we set off the amber alert
All we worry about is you're putrid ass squirt

Don't pretend you know the game
This ain't no dungeon, no piture frame
We ain't wearing leather like your ugly dame
We'll show you how we rose to fame
You motherfuckers are all the same

We'll get ready, get set

Take aim

50 feet above the stage
mind a full of rage
rhymes so massive, can't be caged
measure's off the gauge

I'll fuck you still
the way I rip the wheel
the mental drill
the vocal spill
rip you with my grill
teeth will kill
overflow your will
give you a thrill
better go home and take your pill
flowing still
hold it still
every fear in your mind fulfill
keep your dollar bill
i've put up with your shit until
they call it God's will
that I instill
a new rhyme and spill

in place of your low quality
that's the part of me
that part's gonna be
to you, like a colonoscopy

it's your move bitch
hit me with your best stitch
the thread's
almost dead
better make that hitch
before the glitch
so hit the ignition switch
last chance to beat my rich

>>9535149
>>9535162

stop it. no. take that shit to /x/. not in this thread.

>>9535314
That's /sci/, not /x/.

>>9535314
Magnet's are /b/'s latest thing, take it there instead

>>9535170

As if your emperor is better, that stiff on a chair?
Your ignorance astounds me, I can hardly bear
your pitiful rhymes, like grox to the slaughter
your losin' this fight, you're beat's startin' to faulter

Callin' us pervs, you may be right, but arn't you forgettin' one point of this fight?
Y'all have no fun, your empire is like the guy who bails and the possibility of scorin' some tail
You need to relax and cut loose
Your borin' lives are tying your noose

In fact, my Lord sees some promise in a joint like yours
with followers of trillions, just set the course
for the eye of terror, you wont be ignored
You can join us in our party, you wont be bored
I can assure you, you'll be in the pleasure biz
So ditch the Comatose dead weight that the big E is

>>9535373

You know to any other I'd say
"Fuck you and the horse you rode in on"
But you probably did that yesterday
Yall acting like huge like you know how to slay
Go back to the brothel and let the big boys play

You're sad
You Mad
You lost
The chance you had

You're shit
We're a hit
You try to grab a saggy tit
Our girls are fit

The only thing stiff is your blue balls hat
Oh sorry, did you not like that
It's the sad truth, thats a fact
It's all that you are so don't bulls shit

You're just bunch of furry wet dreams
Someting to make the neckbeards cream
Go back to the internet where you belong
Charging five a month to let virgins watch you ream
You can BAAAW or prove we're wrong

But you can't
You won't
So don't

Go back and on a dick choke
After finding out the chick's a bloke
While the fires of the emprah get stoked
His name we'll evoke
When we gun you don't
Thats how we go to town
So don't frown
When we catch you your pants are STILL brown
You sorry ass clown

>>9534508
It was funny 2 hours ago.

>>9535373
Your tongues speak weakling lies
like a serpent crushed who tries
escaping its fate and denying its doom
forget your words, you won't even have a tomb

We will be heroes though others are not
our stories still remember the times others forgot
the chaos now is nothing to the chaos before
when we conquered the galaxy, knees deep in gore

If you think you can challenge our might
then pick up your chainaxe and fight
it might make an amusing tale
though I expect little from one so frail

As we live, there is no evil that will stand
we will finish this by our own claw and hand
You think you're strong though you are weak
a pathetic, tiny, wretched little sheep
your hands of steel shall be crushed by ours of bone
By death alone for your cowardice you will atone

If the Imperium is ever left dead without laws
the will of one still breathes through our jaws
you have no control, you have no hope
after we've crushed you, you'll beg for the rope

>>9535828
>>9535559

What is this? Some actual retaliation, something new for you guys
I wonder how hard it was for you both to try
to reach our level in the galaxy, you are a mote while on the other hand we
span across the warp ruling it's domains
now hurry fast and run away like Ciaphas Cain

You have no power here, the warp will expand
untill eventually you all have to make your final stand
At the gates of Terra, this was inevitable, you all saw it
The Empire's fall, the open conversion, shit
boys, I don't need this talk from you poser's hissy fits
I have no need to argue with you 2-bit
insane modus operandi

And now a word if I may
you wont see the light of day
Cuz' eventually your light will fall
And that will be the date of slaanesh's ball
So give up
Give in
You lose
We win

Word to your primarchs

I've been in and out for the last hour or so, but now it's time to hit the bar. I'm gonna go get drunk, peace /tg/.

>>9535995

Enjoy the drinks man, you earned them.

>>9536159

True that.

Slaaneshi rapper here to congratulate /tg/ for this thread, made the last couple of hours really enjoyable. This is why I love you /tg/, keep it up, I'm retiring from this thread

>>9535954
You can't even put out a light
how'd you expect to put up a fight?
stop talking like you're strong
all you do is blow all day long

Not surprising from someone who's head is the gutter
I'll make it quick, you won't have time to fellate my cutter
Admit it, you're Russ's bitch
an ultramarine could defeat you without a hitch

It might be hard for you to comprehend
so I'll put it in simple words: bend
backwards and try this out
chainsword meet nurgle-infested spout

Chaos gods are nothing who squirm
making a weakling into a weaker worm
You couldn't even best a baby Guilliman
or put hair on the chest of a wild man

Space Wolf out

Someone call for the best, from afar

Faster than an Eldar
Stronger than a Centaur
Kicking your ass no matter where you are
With my beats from the streets
Putting butts in seats
You know you can't keep up in your ceramite cleats

With my Fallen Legion
You're stallin
Reaching for your nether regions
Laying castles to seige
I'm your new Leige

So don't you wanna
Kneel to Quain'tana
Find battle nirvana
Shit tighter than the sword of shannara
In my cavern Cabana

So don't whine
Don't fear
You swine
Just wait til I kick your rear

>>9536217
Space Wolfer here. Aww. Well, I'm probably off soon myself. Peace! I enjoyed this.

(also, darn, misspelling)

>>9536217

Imperium rapper here, leaving soon myself

>>9536284

i'm out too gentlemen

Archive this.

do we want to start a new round/new thread?
I'd jump in.

i'm surprised this isn't on autosage yet

ITT: Sparrow Clan Politics.

>>9536284
Fake ass drow, you best be fronting
You remind me of a centaur, but it is all your grunting
Too busy Mary Sueing, not enough time rhymin'
Should get a real male, to bust your hymene

I'm from Menzoberranzan, a real drow
Take a quick lesson from me on how to flow
If you can keep up, pay attention
I'll retire your ass and put you on a pention

Reach for my nether regions? Not suprised
You are desperate for a fucking, or so I've surmised
Which is to be expected when I let loose
Ain't a bitch in the Underdark that don't crave the juice

So sit back, drink this all in
Cuz, by now you know your weak game can't win
Face the fact you just lost to a male
You never stood a chance with rhymes so stale

>>9537255

>>9535954
The way I see it, we own the galaxy
While you're holed up in the eye that don't see
You think your lyrics can keep up with me
But your flows are weak, like your devilry

Expandin' the warp, how is that goin'
Last I heard the 13th crusade was no success showin'
Hell Armless failed, while cocks you were blowing
Cadia stood, faith is the secret we knowing

The big E knows your shit's wack
You failed every last attack
You're like Commander, Cobra
You couldn't take us soba
You're a 2 bit villain in a morning cartoon
And your schemes as weak as yo' punkass tune

Like you can get to Terra
You can't pass the Cadain gate
You think you're a terror
But you're just something to hate

Face it, chaos is old news,
Heresy Failed Slow Blues
You just can't let it go
But keep screaming no
It won't keep up with a hero like me y'know

Coz I'm crafty like creed
I'm strong like Gav
Like a human indeed
But plassteel balls I have

I'm Iron like Straken
I killed a Catachan Kracken
Like your rhymes I'm a smackin'
I'm a hero like Cain
So come at me again
If you like the pain
I'll send you insane

I'm plot armoured like Gaunt
My life I do flaunt
But the big E
Is watchin' over me
Won't let me die
So I try
To be the best I can be
But you suckers can't hurt me
I've still got a wound-count of 3
And I'm a warrior eternal you see
My faith is like a 1+ invulnerable shield
I'll never die, and I'll never yeild
And when the day comes that the Emperor's Demandin'
Like Pious I know, I'll muthafucking die standin'

KILL MAIM BURN!
KILL MAIM BURN!
KILL MAIM BURN!
KILL MAIM BURN!
KILL MAIM BURN!
KILL MAIM BURN!
KILL MAIM BURN!
KILL MAIM BURN!
KILL MAIM BURN!
KILL MAIM BURN!
KILL MAIM BURN!
KILL MAIM BURN!
KILL MAIM BURN!
KILL MAIM BURN!
KILL MAIM BURN!
KILL MAIM BURN!
KILL MAIM BURN!
KILL MAIM BURN!
KILL MAIM BURN!
KILL MAIM BURN!
KILL! MAIM! BURN!