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  • File : 1271655650.jpg-(101 KB, 477x599, 1270316342738.jpg)
    101 KB Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)01:40 No.9285336  
    What happens when the Orks finally realize that they can bend reality to their will?

    Pic possibly related.
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)01:41 No.9285354
    >In the 41st Millenium There Is Only War

    They already have.
    >> Rape-Chan !!DhEZOUaepXX 04/19/10(Mon)01:42 No.9285386
         File1271655777.jpg-(27 KB, 450x342, 1256709177100.jpg)
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    >>9285354

    Mind blown.
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)01:43 No.9285405
    GURREN WAAAAAAAAGHANN!
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)01:44 No.9285419
    >>9285386
    Everyone talks about the win state for every race. They don't realise that the eternal static of war with no plot progression IS the ork win state.
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)01:44 No.9285423
    >>9285354
    >that post
    >>9285386
    >that image and its macro text

    I'm lollin', yall.
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)01:45 No.9285440
    >>9285354
    >this

    orks are already in heaven, they can't get any happier
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)01:45 No.9285441
         File1271655916.jpg-(60 KB, 571x459, 1231801577074.jpg)
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    >>9285336
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)01:47 No.9285471
         File1271656028.jpg-(47 KB, 766x371, OrksHaveAlreadyWon.jpg)
    47 KB
    FUKKEN SAVED!
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)01:47 No.9285472
    Ork 1: OI! We can change fings just by finking 'bout it!

    Ork 2: Yoo wot?

    Ork 1: Its true! Wot should we change about reality?

    *Ork 2 ponders this*

    Ork 2: Give it more dakka!

    Ork 1 & 2: WAAAGGH!
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)01:47 No.9285484
         File1271656047.jpg-(155 KB, 635x506, 1270317523356.jpg)
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    >>9285419
    You make an entirely valid point.

    Hell, fighting only one race would be pretty damn boring.
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)01:49 No.9285523
    >>9285471


    I kind of regret not namefagging for that post now.
    Oh well, leejun and all that I guess.
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)01:51 No.9285555
    Great, now I have to think that both Tzeentch and the Orks are technically benevolent. /tg/ has seriously fucked up my view of canon.
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)01:52 No.9285586
         File1271656359.jpg-(13 KB, 216x372, ...heresy.jpg)
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    >>9285354

    By the throne...
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)01:53 No.9285600
    >>9285555
    In what way is Tzeentch benevolent?
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)01:54 No.9285618
    >>9285354
    ...fuck
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)01:54 No.9285630
    >>9285600
    I think he might have meant 'omnicient'.
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)02:00 No.9285759
    How this for more mindfuckery? The Emperor will never die because the orks don't want him to. The Orks see the Emperor as humanity's warboss. They also know that there is no human big enough to replace him so that means that if he dies then the never ending waaagh he offers dies as well.
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)02:01 No.9285771
    OP has inspired it: Social Enguhnearin' Boyz
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)02:03 No.9285820
    >>9285600
    >>9285630
    Tzeentch is a dick who couldn't care less about his followers, but he also seems to be heavily in favor of keeping the universe 'thriving' in one state or another and has been under suspicion of actively scheming against the other chaos gods to keep the Galaxy out of their hands.
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)02:03 No.9285824
         File1271657001.png-(833 KB, 2560x1536, gorkandmork.png)
    833 KB
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)02:08 No.9285923
         File1271657288.jpg-(395 KB, 1000x600, 1264382536699.jpg)
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    >>9285824
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)02:10 No.9285959
    >>9285923
    Awesomeness.
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)02:10 No.9285970
    >>9285484
    >Hell, fighting only one race would be pretty damn boring.

    This makes me think the Orks got bored with everyone in the galaxy and psychic'd up the Tyranid, an ever evolving, changing enemy.

    They'll never be bored again.
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)02:11 No.9285984
    >>9285970

    Why don't Orks fear the C'Tan? Because they made them.
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)02:12 No.9286001
    >>9285984
    Orks created the universe just so they'd have someone to fight.
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)02:12 No.9286013
    >>9285820
    Tzeentch is the Lord of Change, and values Chaos as a pure force more than any of the other gods.

    If any of the others were to succeed, the universe would essentially become stagnant, in either bloodshed, deathless illness, or hedonistic pleasure. He's the guy who keeps shit running.
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)02:14 No.9286046
    >>9286013

    So... Tzeentch is Obama?
    >> Alpharius 04/19/10(Mon)02:16 No.9286082
    then they free themselves from the Matrix and fight the machine overlords
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)02:16 No.9286089
    >>9286046
    Or the God of Abraham, take your pick.
    He certainly could be the Emp's dad.
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)02:17 No.9286100
    >>9285759
    Ork's made Emprah 'cause dem 'umies weren't puttin' up a gud fight, dey needs dem a warboss or sumfin
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)02:18 No.9286132
    >>9285923
    fuck that's awesome.
    >> Alpharius 04/19/10(Mon)02:20 No.9286166
         File1271658025.jpg-(33 KB, 757x583, 1270359332271.jpg)
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    >this thread
    >> Alpharius 04/19/10(Mon)02:20 No.9286180
    >>9286089
    >Tzeentch is the Abrahamic God
    >Emprah is proxy Jesus
    >Tzeentch is Emprah
    >Father and Son
    >Emprah lives as nonsentient power in the warp as the astronomicon
    >Spirit

    HO LEE FUCKING SHIT
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)02:22 No.9286214
         File1271658148.jpg-(29 KB, 640x368, 1271051239585.jpg)
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    >>9286180

    MY GOD!

    IT'S ALL COMING TOGETHER!
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)02:22 No.9286217
    If they ever realized they were reality warpers, their reality warping powers would stop working. Then, once they were tricked into thinking they don't warp reality, it would start working again and they wouldn't notice.
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)02:24 No.9286252
    >>9286180
    EMPEROR FUCKING CHRIST IT'S SO CLEAR NOW
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)02:25 No.9286287
    >>9286252

    Now if only Tzeentch would make Matt Ward have a sudden heart attack it could become truly canon.
    >> Alpharius 04/19/10(Mon)02:26 No.9286288
    >>9286214
    >>9286180
    IT GETS BETTER

    >Gork and Mork are twins
    >Early judaic traditions portray god (Christian "father") as fusion of male and female twins in single being
    >twins are part of trinity
    >twins are also son and also spirit
    >Tzeentch and Emprah are outward expressions of Gork and Mork's Will

    The fate of the Galaxy in the 41st Millennium is the result of a massive circular self-trolling by Gork and Mork, who were just looking for something fun to do.
    >> Alpharius 04/19/10(Mon)02:26 No.9286303
         File1271658398.png-(97 KB, 270x260, 1259039458794.png)
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    I need to lie down
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)02:26 No.9286311
    >>9286288
    See:
    >>9286252
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)02:29 No.9286362
    this thread is as epic as the start od the guy calling out the edition warsies with shadowrun... actually no it's more epic. what about the C'tan and the Tau guys?
    >> Captain AdMech guy 04/19/10(Mon)02:29 No.9286378
         File1271658589.png-(123 KB, 933x408, INTERNET REACTION IMAGE.png)
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    >>9286288
    I DON'T KNOW HOW TO FEEL ANYMORE
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)02:30 No.9286392
         File1271658632.jpg-(39 KB, 450x268, 1270937199062.jpg)
    39 KB
    I always knew that the Emperor ran parallels to Christ, but... well, Christ...
    >> Captain AdMech guy 04/19/10(Mon)02:30 No.9286397
         File1271658643.jpg-(49 KB, 428x410, wh- I enjoy that.jpg)
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    >>9286378
    Oh wait, yes I do. Unless you go and fuck up the Omnissiah-as-Robot-Jesus for Machine God-God thing.
    >> 40Kfag from /m/ !!t8iiyj3DIqR 04/19/10(Mon)02:33 No.9286449
         File1271658799.jpg-(34 KB, 704x400, snapshot20090603062508.jpg)
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    I SEE IT. I SEE FOREVER.
    >> Protofag 04/19/10(Mon)02:34 No.9286467
    >>9286180
    hope
    >> Alpharius 04/19/10(Mon)02:36 No.9286527
    >>9286397
    >Omnissiah
    >Machine God

    All I'm hearing is a ritualized form of Dakka-Worship, inseparably tied to Emprah worship, which is of course worship of Tzeentch, and thus of Mork and Gork behind it all.

    >>9286362
    >C'Tan and Tau guys

    At this point it's child's play to finish connecting the dots.
    Observe:

    If the necrontyr had succeeded in their quest for true immortality, they would no longer have been fun for the orks to fight. Thus, Mork's low kunnin inspired the idea to put on some flowy robes and make themselves look less orky (temporarily of course). By sticking the necrontyr into tiny living metal shells, they guaranteed not only an interesting new foe to fight, but an endless source of raw materials.

    The Tau are, of course, secretly being manipulated by Eldrad, who worships the Eldar gods, who were in turn inspired by non-Christian religions (often goddess and nature worship) in Earth's history. These cults were in opposition to Christianity, and therefore by extension to the Emprah, who is Tzeentch, who is Mork and Gork.

    BAM.
    >> Captain AdMech guy 04/19/10(Mon)02:38 No.9286573
    >>9286527
    THEN WHO COVERS CHOPPY

    I get that the Machine God-Omnissiah-Machine Spirit trio are basically the Dakka Edition of Tzeench-Emprah-Astronomicon, but what covers the choppy side of waaaugh?
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)02:39 No.9286594
         File1271659185.jpg-(25 KB, 216x282, whatthezog.jpg)
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    >>9286527
    >> Alpharius 04/19/10(Mon)02:40 No.9286605
    >>9286573
    >I've never played Dawn of War or read a Codex or Fluff novel.

    You may not be familiar with the ancient prayer of Guardsmen, Inquisitors, Marines, and DH Acolytes everywhere,

    "Emperor guide my blade!"
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)02:41 No.9286623
    >>9286527
    I can see forever!
    >> Alpharius 04/19/10(Mon)02:42 No.9286657
         File1271659375.jpg-(177 KB, 480x600, 1269197359764.jpg)
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    is...is this what religious enlightenment feels like?
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)02:43 No.9286674
    >>9286605
    Work Khorne in there as the choppy
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)02:44 No.9286695
    >>9285336
    Reality only bends to their will when they think something works. If they realized their ability they would then also realize nothing they create works, thus it would stop working. The Ork species would go extinct.
    >> Alpharius 04/19/10(Mon)02:44 No.9286697
    can we archive this? I need to be able to come back and bask in glory again
    >> Alpharius 04/19/10(Mon)02:45 No.9286716
    >>9286674

    Ah yes, it occurs to me there is one last major player to address to bring this full circle. It isn't new, but it may be unfamiliar to some people, and it bears introduction to this thread in expectation of archival.

    >Violence and bloodshed [x]
    >Absolutely ludicrous amounts of excess [x]
    >Unafraid and in fact embracing of the inevitability of death [x]
    >The long lost missing element, now found in this thread.

    Guess who's behind those ruinous powers, folks...

    (You should have known as soon as you heard they were called Chaos. Nobody does chaos like Gork 'n' Mork.)
    >> Captain AdMech guy 04/19/10(Mon)02:46 No.9286727
    >>9286605
    Well, I was hoping for another trinity to cover it, but the Emprah straight up will work out.

    Also,

    >Haven't played any DoW. Everything else I've done.

    I should pick one of them up.
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)02:47 No.9286741
    >>9285984

    Correction, Old Ones made Orks, Jokaeiro and Eldar to combat C'tan, all which backfired.

    C'tan woke up, nightbriger to be exact and gave all races, fear outside Orkamunda or Gork and Mork, the entity of ork race that manage to escape the gift of fear that nightbringer gave them.

    Orks had Brainboys, which either died out or joined with gork and mork, due to their nature to understand warp/ork collective psyche/real space like a motherfuckers.
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)02:49 No.9286780
    >>9286716

    All the bloodshed has to be done in his name and in rage or fury, Orks kill things because they fucking love to kill things.

    Plus, the backgrounds static that comes from WAAAAAGHs ol' Khrone ain't getting his blood to his blood pits anyway, plus there has to be some chaos presence or altars to the khrone.
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)02:52 No.9286842
    >>9286697
    >can we archive this?

    done
    >> fault 04/19/10(Mon)02:54 No.9286873
         File1271660069.png-(142 KB, 255x325, at first.png)
    142 KB
    OUR EYES HAVE BEEN OPENED
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)02:55 No.9286898
         File1271660152.png-(20 KB, 124x137, teegee.png)
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    Of course now that we've realised all this SOMEBODY is going to purge us...
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)02:59 No.9286948
    >>9286898
    But of course.
    We're breathing without reciting the Litany of Pure Breath.
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)03:00 No.9286965
    only a strategic genius could piece this all together...


    CREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED!
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)03:01 No.9286978
    >>9285759
    If we convince the Orkz that the Emperor is actually alive and a total badass who will give them a universe shattering fight, does that by the time they get to the Golden Throne he'll come back more awesome then ever?
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)03:03 No.9286998
         File1271660587.jpg-(100 KB, 800x782, Sister_Yandere_by_Karooz.jpg)
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    >>9286898
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)03:04 No.9287018
    Someone fucking archive this shit!
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)03:04 No.9287024
    >>9286948
    Or even the Litany of Proper Litanies!
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)03:04 No.9287031
    >>9286978

    Also,as a hilarious side note:

    A huge-ass warboss back in age of crusades, nearly choked, FUCKING CHOKED emeperor to death, only to be killed by horus.

    You heard that right, it took Emperor's own might and his greatest son, to take down a nameless warboss who was about to choke a bitch.
    >> Alpharius 04/19/10(Mon)03:05 No.9287041
    >>9286965
    What we need now is a drawfag to show us Creed and Kell as Mork and Gork, respectively.

    Brutally Cunnin' and Cunningly Brutal.
    >> Alpharius 04/19/10(Mon)03:05 No.9287055
         File1271660749.jpg-(408 KB, 1585x2878, And Then Everyone Was Mork And(...).jpg)
    408 KB
    I think I got all the relevant bits of the thread.
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)03:07 No.9287083
    >>9287018
    Why bother? It's shit, just like you said, because it's very baie, simplistic stuff that isn't even moderately creative.
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)03:07 No.9287088
    >>9286716
    But all this is coming from Alpharius!

    It must be a plot to weaken our faith in the Emperor, listen not to this traitors lies!
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)03:07 No.9287092
    I can only imagine what the 40k universe was like BEFORE the orks realised all this..

    " Greeting's farseer, now that all of the representatives are present we shall begin the signing of the GALACTIC PEACE TREATY OF UNITED PLANETS! "

    *Cheering*

    " And though the orks are still a plague upon all those that strive for peace, I know that united we cannot fail! "

    *More cheering as the peace treaty is signed. Galactic peace is but moments away*

    and then >>9285472

    "Where did my pen go? Is this a GUN? Why does the eldar ambassador have a spea -...E- Eldar.................DEATH TO THE XENOS! "

    Orkz: WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH! :D
    >> Alpharius 04/19/10(Mon)03:10 No.9287125
    >>9286978
    holy fuckwits that would be AWESOME

    huge ork horde arrives at the emperor's place, and due to the orks wanting a huge fight, they unconsciously made the emperor alive and well again, who proceeds to fuck the living shit out of EVERYONE
    >> Alpharius 04/19/10(Mon)03:11 No.9287149
    >>9287088
    >>9287088

    Man, did YOU miss a fantastic thread.

    >>9281947
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)03:12 No.9287162
    >>9287125
    Orks roll back time to before the Heresy, Horus never betrays Emps, Emps never dies

    WAAAGH forever
    >> Alpharius 04/19/10(Mon)03:13 No.9287188
    >>9287149
    oh hey Alpharius, nice to see you here
    >> Alpharius 04/19/10(Mon)03:14 No.9287197
    >>9287188
    Dude! Didn't even see you there, Alpharius.

    How's the kids?
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)03:15 No.9287212
    >>9287149
    What are yo-
    >>9281947
    >everyone is Alpharius
    D:
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)03:15 No.9287213
    >>9287092

    Human were fucked to beging with, horus heresy caused so much damage to the empire that the scars show today, united they could've hold the empire with emperor alongside them, chaos by itself, would've been harmless. But now they are fucked.

    Necrons were fucked by Enslavers, which seemed to dissappear after they gobbled up the edible morsels of C'tan, but now they are ready to harvest once again.

    Chaos is what it is, god-awful mess of powers that cannot unite proper without constant inner-bickering and strife.

    Orks have it gud, they fight for sake of fightin', spread to worlds and hop off if they get bored. They aren't bothered by the constant violence and gore filled culture of Orks, for it is part of their society and it fucking works, as seen in gigantic waves of WAAAAAGH that can even stall hive fleets.

    Eldar are whiny pussies that blame everything on "Lesser-creatures" and has a habit of not telling shit, where their knowledge would be useful to Tau or Empire alike. But no, they have to bitch and write emo-poetry about exarchs how they got lost to the path of the warrior.

    Tau? Naive, childlike race neck-deep in pure hypocrisy, they have always been what they damn others with, tyrants.

    Speaking of tyranids, tyranids have it pretty damn good, until they run out of food that is.
    >> Alpharius 04/19/10(Mon)03:16 No.9287232
    link to archive?
    >> Alpharius 04/19/10(Mon)03:16 No.9287240
    >>9287197
    why don't you meet them yourself? kids, come over here!

    okay, here's my oldest son, Alpharius, and this is my youngest, he's about 10 years old now. His name's Alpharius. Kids, I'd like you to meet a good friend of mine, Alpharius.
    >> Alpharius 04/19/10(Mon)03:17 No.9287258
    >>9287232
    http://4chanarchive.org/
    go to request interface on the left
    put in 9285336 as the thread
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)03:18 No.9287279
    >>9287258


    i meant suptg? u mean noone has put this on SUPTG yet? like as in the archive site that matters for this board?
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)03:18 No.9287280
    >>9287258
    See:
    >>9286842
    http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/9285336/
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)03:22 No.9287345
         File1271661770.jpg-(61 KB, 480x700, mork_and_gork2.jpg)
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    >>9286288
    >just looking for something fun to do
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)03:26 No.9287413
    >>9287345
    I'd tap that green ass.
    >> Alpharius 04/19/10(Mon)03:38 No.9287612
    >>9287240
    Alpharius!
    Where's my money?
    >> Alpharius 04/19/10(Mon)03:42 No.9287664
    >>9287612
    Alpharius has it.


    Because it's in your pocket, dumbass.
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)03:46 No.9287715
    >>9287413
    Do orks have buttholes, canonically speaking?
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)03:54 No.9287841
    >>9287715

    Probably, they do eat.
    >> Anonymous 04/19/10(Mon)03:58 No.9287900
    >>9287715

    Of course they do, thats what they grow their food fungus, feed squigs and their spores grow in.



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