EAT TREE

try to find the scent of food

OW
YAY COLOR, Also demand to know where we are (ask our wench)

WALK THE FUCK OUT THE STUPID FOREST!

Color now, yay! Where's Olga?

>>8195016
YOU ASK THAT IDIOT- WHERE THE FUCK IS THAT BITCH?! SHE'S NOWHERE IN FUCKING SIGHT!

>>8195105
OW
FUCK, TIME TO HUNT HER DOWN

>>8195118
the viking child must know her scent, yeah?

just need to find it

OW MAYBE AFTER WE FIND THAT DUMB STUPID GIRL WE CAN LOOK FOR THAT FOP AND SEE HOW USEFUL HE IS WITHOUT HIS CRAP FLYER.

>>8195118
YOU START YOUR MAD HUNT THROUGH THE FOREST! YOUR RAGE MAINTAINS DUE TO THAT DUMB BITCH INCONVENIENCING YOU!

FUCKING ROLL A D100 TO INVESTIGATE AND ROLL HIGH YOU PIECE OF SHIT!

rolled 57 = 57

>>8195250
I get to kill this one when I find it, yeah?

OW

rolled 30 = 30

>>8195250
OW START CHOPPING DOWN TREES THAT GET IN YOUR WAY TILL YOU FIND HER.

>>8195297
30, anon?

you can't even pick up the axe in your monkey twig-arms, eh?

>>8194984
shave your shitty beard off

rolled 37 = 37

FUCK SHIT

OW I LOVE YOU SHOW THE WORLD SOME LOVE <3 <3 <3

>>8195295
AFTER STRAINING YOUR FUCKING EYES AND ATTEMPTING TO BE A FUCKING DETECTIVE ABOUT THIS SHIT, YOU SPOT SOME BLOOD IN THE GRASS ALONG WITH DRAG MARKS LEADING AWAY FROM WHERE YOU FUCKING LANDED IN THE FOREST!

>>8195428
OW MUST FOLLOW TRAIL AND HAVE AXE READY TO HACK SMACK AND CHOP.

>>8195428
WHERE THE FUCK DOES IT LEAD!?

>>8195428
OW FUCK NO ONE ELSE IS ALLOWED TO HURT HER BUT US. FOLLOW THAT SHIT.

START KNOCKING DOWN TREES WITH YOUR SKULL UNTILL YOU FIND HER!

>>8195455
WHAT FUCKING AXE?! YOU THREW THAT SHIT THROUGH YOUR FUCKING FLYING MACHINE! YOU LOST IT ON YOUR FUCKING FALL DOWN! WHAT YOU DO HAVE IS A PIECE OF SHIT SWORD AND A FUCKING SHIELD!

YOU HAVE A PLEASANT FUCKING STROLL THROUGH THE FUCKING WOODS, FOLLOWING THE TRAIL! EVENTUALLY YOU THINK YOU HEAR MUSIC!

>>8195625
ASK THOSE FUCKERS WHERE OUR BITCH WENT, AND FIND MEANS TO GET DRUNK

>>8195625
OW FOLLOW THE FAGGY SOUND

>>8195625
OW

MARCH IN THERE WITH MY SWORD AS ANGRY AS I AM AND DEMAND MY WHORE

>>8195647
AND TELL THEM TO PLAY BETTER THEY SOUND LIKE THEIR FUCKING THEIR INSTRUMENTS!

I'm not the one who suggested we axe the balloon, but I DID suggest we toss Englishboy out of the basket, when it looked like it was going to have to be either him or Olga.

OW, SPLIT OUR LUNGS WITH BLOOD AND THUNDER AND ASK HER WHERE OUR FOOD IS.

>>8195827
>suggested tossing Englishboy out of the airship

>>8195688
YOU STUMBLE ACROSS OLGA PLAYING HER STUPID ASS MUSIC TO FUCKING FOREST SPIRITS! WHAT KIND OF FUCKING SHIT IS THIS?!

>>8195907
OW, ANGRILY ASK A) WHERE OUR FOOD IS AND B) HOW OUR BALLAD IS COMING ALONG

>>8195907
OW TELL HER TO ASK THESE PUSSY SPIRITS WHERE A BIG ASS AWESOME CHALLENGE IS. BECAUSE WE NEED TO FIGHT SOMEONE FUCK.

NOW THIS IS HOW A MONTHERFUCKING QUEST SHOULD GO DOWN
GODDAMN

>>8195912
"Is this really the fucking time for food or song Olaf?"

THE FAGGY FOREST SPIRITS ARE GROWLING AT YOU. IT'S LIKE THEY ARE JUST ASKING FOR YOU TO KICK THEIR TEETH IN!

"Fucking save me already you shit head berserker!"

OW, KICK THEIR FUCKING TEETH IN

rolled 65 = 65

>>8196067
not great with those little sticks, but here goes

OW
RUSH THE WYRM-THINGS AND POKE THEM WITH THE SWORD-STICK

>>8196083
ROLL FOR TEETH KICKING ASSHAT! D100 RIGHT NOW!

rolled 24 = 24

>>8196104
KICK THOSE TEETH IN

rolled 14 = 14

>>8196104
THIS IS THE NUMBER OF TEETH KICKED IN

rolled 58 = 58

>>8196104
OW, WE SHALL TAKE THEIR SKINS FOR COVERINGS AND THEIR TEETH AS TROPHIES OF WAR

>>8196134
>>8196135
>>8196151
all three of you monkeys rolled into one might be able to chop down a flower, viking-anons

DON'T WORRY PISSCUNT I AM HERE AGAIN.
FUCKING ARCHIVED:
http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/8194984/

>>8196220
DON'T BRING THAT SHIT HERE, SCARED OF SHADOWS.

DON'T YOU DARE BRING THAT INFIGHTING INTO THIS QUEST

JUST SHUT UP AND SIT BACK UNTIL NARRATOR GETS BACK TO US WITH A RESULT.

>>8196067
OW

DROP KICK, PRONTO

>>8196258
... you might make a good viking, viking-anon

don't think I'd mess with you

>>8196268
YO TARVUS

SO I HERD U LIEK DARK HERESY

>>8196085
AND WOULDN'T YOU FUCKING KNOW IT?! THE FUCKING TROLL OF /TG/, THAT FURRY-FUCK FAKE ASS WOLF ACTUALLY GIVES YOU GUYS A GOOD ROLL! STEP THE FUCK UP OR YOU'LL MAKE US LOOK BAD!

>>8196323
OW FUCK WEAPONS, USE OLGA TO BEAT THE FUCK OUT OF THE SPIRITS. THATS WHAT SHE WANTS ANYWAYS

>>8196334
FUCK THIS

OW, THAT FUCKING TEARS IT

OW, TELL OLGA TO HIDE BEHIND SOME COVER AND TO NOT COME OUT UNTIL WE ARE DONE, THEN PROCEED TO CONSUME THE RAGE MUSHROOM.

rolled 20 = 20

>>8196334

accompanied roll.

rolled 2, 1, 1, 1, 2, 3, 1, 3, 1, 3, 1, 3, 1, 1, 3, 3, 1, 2, 3, 3, 3, 2, 3, 1, 1 = 49

>>8196323
WE MUST KILL FAST BUT SWORDS TOO SLOW
PUNCH THE REST OF THOSE FUCKERS TO DEATH

>>8196307

CAN'T TALK

BUSY WATCHING AWESOME IN PROGRESS

OW! I SECOND >>8196334 , BUT GIVE HER YOUR HELMET

rolled 89 = 89

>>8196323
OW RIP AND TEAR THEIRS GUTS.
RIP AND TEAR!

rolled 18 = 18

>>8196334
SHE'S A GODDAMN WENCH, NOT A BLUNT WEAPON

BESIDES, IF WE HURT OUR SKALD, WHO THE FUCK IS GOING TO TELL GRAND TALES OF OUR HEROIC RAGE?

NOT US, FOR FUCKING SURE, WE AREN'T FAGS WHO SING AND COMPOSE BALLADS.

WE'RE THE ONES THE BALLADS ARE MADE ABOUT

OW, CUT US SOME FOOKING SPIRITS WITH OUR RAGE.

>>8196350
OW WE 'AVE 'ORNS! IMPALE SE FUKERS TO DEAS!

>>8196350
PLEASE TELL ME THOSE WERE NOT ALL D100S.

>>8196384
OW, THEY WERE 43d3S

rolled 50 = 50

OW

COMBAT OPERANDI: VIKING DIPLOMACY

>>8196407
But we have no axe!

OP HERE! NOT SURE WHICH ONE TO FUCKING PICK, SO I'M GOING TO TALLY ALL THE ACTIONS PUT FORWARD SO FAR ABOVE ME. FUCKING DEMOCRACY!

AS FOR >>8196347 , THE ROLL WASN'T HIGH ENOUGH!

>>8196361
OH, I THINK YOU'LL TALK TO YOUR DEALER, TARVUS

SORRY FOR BEING GONE, I'VE BEEN AWAY FROM HOME THE LAST COUPLE OF DAYS.

>>8196426
OW, DO>>8196364

OW, DO NOT WASTE OLGA OR RAGE MUSHROOM.

WHAT IS THIS FAGGOTRY? STOP IT AT ONCE, NO ONE EXCEPT I AM ALLOWED TO USE CAPS LOCK.

>>8196407


THIS ISN'T MSPAINT ADVENTURE FUCKNUTS.

rolled 37 = 37

>>8196323
why do you want to make me rage on you, fake-anon?

I've been behaving in your thread, yeah?

let's stomp these fucking green-squiggle-things

>>8196426
89 UP THIS MOTHERFUCKER >>8196364

rolled 82 = 82

>>8196334
OW THIS ROLL IS LOW BECAUSE YOUR OLGA-PROFICIENCY NEEDS WORK

rolled 3, 1, 3, 1, 2, 3, 1, 2, 1, 1, 2, 1, 1, 2, 2, 1, 1, 1, 2, 3, 2, 2, 1, 3, 3 = 45

>>8196458
INVALID YOU DIDN'T YELL YOUR TYPING
DAMN WE CAN'T SIT HERE WASTING TIME TO FUCKING DISCUSS THIS SHIT WE NEED TO START KILL THESE CUNTS QUICKLY

rolled 1 = 1

>>8196499
FINE YOU FUCKING MONKEY

YOU THINK IT DOESNT BOTHER ME WHEN YOU CALL ME A TROLL AND A MONKEY?

ITS FUNNY TO YOU? YOU KNOW WHATS FUNNY TO ME? YOUR FRESH EVISCERATED CORPSE STEAMING IN THE COLD AIR

>>8196618
>rolled 1 = 1
FURFAG FAIL
GET OUT OF HERE SCARED OF SHIT.

>>8196618
THAT'S SOME PROPER VIKING SPEAK! AND ROLL BETTER NEXT TIME

>>8196618

I think we got you first.

rolled 1, 3, 2, 2, 1, 3, 3, 3, 3, 2, 2, 2, 2, 2, 3, 1, 2, 2, 2, 1, 3, 3, 2, 2, 3 = 55

>>8196618
A ONE
A FUCKING ONE
OUT OF ALL THE SHITTY NUMBERS, ONE
OLAF PROBABLY CAN'T EVEN COUNT BECAUSE HE'S TOO BUSY BEING ANGRY AND KILLING SHIT AND EVEN HE KNOWS YOU ARE A FUCKING GODDAMN FAILURE YOU..YOU....DOUBLE FAGGOT

>>8196618

Harsh. Lets hope we're playing DH...

>>8196629
stop projecting your furfag shit ONTO ME

it's always been you

I am NOT A FUCKING FURRY

>>8196448
>>8196364
RIP AND TEAR! THERE IS A SHIT LOAD OF THEM! THERE WILL BE A SHIT LOAD OF GUTS! ROLL TO CONTINUE RIPPING AND TEARING!

>>8196663
FINE

WE'RE SPECIESIST

IF YOU HAVEN'T FUCKING NOTICED, WE DON'T EVEN GIVE TWO SHITS ABOUT HUMANS, MUCH LESS SOME FUCKING WEREWOLF

YOU'LL BE A FOOTNOTE IN THE BALLAD OF OLAF WHISTLEAXE, YOU GODDAMN WOLF, AND YOUR PELT SHALL BE LAID BEFORE OUR HEARTH.

rolled 55 = 55

>>8196677
SLAUGHTER THE FUCKING ANON-SPIRITS

ANON GENOCIDE TONIGHT

rolled 9 = 9

>>8196677
OW FUCK YEAH RIP N' TEAR

rolled 100 = 100

>>8196677
CHAAAAAAARGE

>>8196663
SURE YOU ARE FUCKING WOLF-PRETENDING FAGGOT.

rolled 32 = 32

>>8196720
>>8196720
OW, FUCK YEAH 100

rolled 65 = 65

>>8196677
RIP AND TEAR WITH A VENGEANCE

rolled 30 = 30

>>8196720

OW

I HUMBLY REQUEST A DROP-KICK OF NUCLEAR PROPORTIONS

rolled 38 = 38

>>8196727
how would a wolf even USE A FUCKING COMPUTER, SHITHEAD?

OW! NO RIPPING! NO TEARING! THOSE ARE FOR BABIES! REAL MEN CRUSH THEIR ENEMY'S HEAD TILL IT IMPLODES!!!

rolled 86 = 86

>>8196720
>FUCKING 100
OW LET OUT A SCREAM OF RAGE AND EVERY SPIRIT FUCKING EXPLODE FROM THE SHEER POWER OF THE SHOCWAVE

rolled 6 = 6

>>8196794
FUUUUUUUCK!!!

>>8196776
HOW THE FUCK SHOULD WE KNOW? ALL WE CARE ABOUT IS RIP N' TEAR, AND SON, JUDGING BY THAT 100, IT LOOKS LIKE WE'RE ALL OUT OF SHIT-FACED FOREST SPRITES TO FUCK UP

LOOKS LIKE YOU ARE SHIT OUT OF LUCK ONCE WE'RE DONE HERE.

rolled 46 = 46

>>8196820
DOUBLE FUUUUUUCK!!!

>>8196708
LET'S SEE HERE... PRETENDING TO BE AN ANTHROPOMORPHIC ANIMAL? CHECK.

YOU'RE A GODDAMN FURRY.

GTFO AND STOP RUINING THIS BOARD.

ALRIGHT FAGGOTS

TIME TO IGNORE SCARED OF BITCHY SHADOWS, WHATEVER THE FUCK IT IS.

WE HAVE RIPPING AND TEARING TO DO.

IGNORE IT, AND WE CAN GO BACK TO BEING VIKINGS

rolled 83 = 83

>>8196824
YOU GOING TO POKE ME WITH THOSE LITTLE STICKS, CHIMP?

WE KILLED ALL THE SPIRITS BY NOW, YEAH?

>>8196618
Does it make you feel better, making threats over the internet? Does it help ease the pain, knowing that you are just some socially awkward nerd pretending to be something that has power you will never have?

Sorry for the extra post. I'll shut up, now.

>>8196940
SEE >>8196884

NOW, BACK TO OUR VIKING ACTIVITIES!

>>8196708
YOU FUCKING RIP AN ARM OFF OF ONE OF THE STUPID SPIRITS!
>>8196719
YOU FUCKING FAIL AT HITTING THE OF ONE, IT FUCKING HITS YOU INSTEAD!
>>8196720
YOU FUCKING SEPARATE ONE OF THE SPIRIT ASSHOLES HEAD FROM IT'S BODY!
>>8196742
YOU FUCKING MISS!
>>8196745
YOU GET A LEG!

WAIT A FUCKING SECOND! IS THAT A FUCKING DRYAD?!

rolled 86 = 86

>>8197023
OW CATCH THE FUCKING DRYAD AND BASH IT UNTIL IT... WHATEVER

>>8197023
OW, TELL HER TO STEP THE FUCK BACK IF SHE DOESN'T WANT A SWORD IN HER ASS. IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN

rolled 66 = 66

>>8197023
OW

JUMP THE DRYAD

rolled 69 = 69

>>8197023
RAPE

rolled 96 = 96

>>8197023
CHOKE THE DRYAD WITH ONE HAND HOLDING IT ON THE GROUND WHILE SMASHING IT IN THE HEAD WITH WHATEVER COMES TO HAND FIRST

rolled 94 = 94

>>8197023
OW CAPTURE HER

>>8197076
...FOR CHAOS?

OW CATCH THAT BITCH

>>8197062
>>8197054
OW, WE OBVIOUSLY INTIMIDATED HER INTO COWERING HELPLESSLY ON THE GROUND WITH THE COMBINATION OF THESE TWO.

OW Water the dryad :3

>>8197054
>>8197062
>>8197065
>>8197067
>>8197073
>>8197076
YOU GRAB THE STUPID TREE BITCH BY THE THROAT BEFORE SHE CAN ESCAPE! YOU ARE JUST ABOUT TO IMPLEMENT YOUR AMAZING PLAN WHEN SHE DECIDES SHE'S ALLOWED TO SPEAK!

"Uh... I surrender?"

SURRENDER? SURRENDER?! Wait... what does that mean again?

rolled 5 = 5

>>8197312
OW THAT MEANS YOU GOT YOURSELF A NEW SKALD.

>>8197312
OW, IT MEANS WE SLAP HER AROUND A BIT AND ASK HER WHAT THE FUCK WAS GOING ON HERE

>>8197312
OW ASK HER WHAT DOES THIS WORD FUCKING MEAN WHILE PUNCHING HER REPEATEDLY

>>8197312

OW GET OLGA TO DEFINE THAT SHIT BEFORE YOU EVISCERATE THE DRYAD IN A FIT OF ILLITERACY

BITCH IS SUPPOSED TO BE A BRAINY TYPE

>>8197339
>>8197340
COMBO TIEM

WE TELL HER TO TELL US WHAT THE FUCK WAS GOING ON AND OLGA GETS A NEW FRIEND.

>>8197351
>>8197343
>>8197340
>>8197339
COMBINAN'

SLAP THE DRYAD AROUND A BIT, THEN ASK OLGA WHAT SURRENDER MEANS. OLGA GETS NEW UNDERSTUDY/TRAVELING COMPANION SO SHE ISN'T CONSTANTLY BITCHING AT US AND SHE HAS SOMEBODY TO TALK TO.

>>8197408
If she is a "standard" dryad, she can't get far away from her tree, no?

rolled 61 = 61

>>8197312
OW
IT MEANS SHE GIVES UP

>>8197452
WE TEAR THAT FUCKER OUT OF THE GROUND AND CARRY IT AROUND WITH US

WE NEED A NEW BOAT ANYWAY.

rolled 62 = 62

>>8197588
WE FORGE THE FIRST DRYAD BOAT
FUCK YES

>>8197614
INB4 OLAF WHISTLEAXE AND OLGA THE WINDWAKER

rolled 49 = 49

>>8197614
>>8197614

OW

I SECOND THIS

holy fucking shit
fuck yes to the dryad boat. Make it grow berries while we sail as well so we can eat instead of slapping olga around until she fishes something up.

>>8197408
>>8197452
>>8197614
WHAT COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG?! OH YEAH! YOU FUCKING LEVEL UP TOO!

>>8197731
TIE DRYAD TO PROW
ADVICEOW.JPEG
CREATE WINDWAKER BOAT

>>8197762
>A SMILE
OH GOD WHAT

>>8197762
OW WHAT DOES THE LVL UP GIVES US?

>>8197762
OW, ANY NEW ABILITIES OR ANYTHING, WE NEED TO RAPE SHIT HARDER

>>8197762
OW, TELL HER TO TELL US WHERE HER TREE IS

ITS FUCKING LUMBERJACK TIE-

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

WE HAVE NO AXE

>>8197816
WE HAVE TEETH

>>8197785
YOU GAIN 1 MOTHERFUCKING PERMANENT STAT BONUS AND 5 EXTRA BEAT-DOWN TOLERANCE!

WHAT STAT TO YOU PLACE IT IN?!

>>8197877
SMARTABILITY. SO WE CAN FIND OUT MORE WAYS OF BEATING STUFF DOWN.

>>8197877
RAGE OR STRENGTH, SERIOUSLY

>>8197877
MUSHROOM

OW

RAGE, RAGE IS BETTER THAN ANY OF THOSE OTHER CRAPPY STATS.

OW, STRENGTH OR RAGE

>>8197877
OW, CREATE NEW STAT: MAGICIALABILITY

>>8197877
OW STRONGNESS FOR RIP AND TEAR.

>>8197877
BADASSNESS

>>8197914
FUCK THIS SHIT!
OW GO FOR STRENGTH!

IS RAGE EVEN A STAT

SEEM TO RECALL IT BEING MORE FLEXIBLE THAN THAT

ALSO OW PUT THAT STRONGNESS UP YOU NEED TO RIP AND TEAR THE OCEAN ITSELF

Strongness, we need to pump up our viking, he looks scrawny.

>>8197877
OW FACIAL STRUCTURE

rolled 14 = 14

>>8197877
OW QUICKNESS

WE DON''T NEED TO UPGRADE RAGE, WE CAN JUST BEAT THE FUCK OUT OF SOMEONE OR EAT SOME MUSHROOMS FOR A BONUS.

>>8197907
YOU ARE SO ANGRY! SO ODIN BLESSED ANGRY! YOUR RAGE IS PERMANENTLY SET TO 2! SADLY, YOU FUCKING CAN'T RAISE THIS STAT AGAIN UNTIL LEVEL 5!

OW PUT IT IN STRENGTH YOUR RAGE GOES UP AND DOWN NO MATTER WHAT AND WITH TWO LOUD WENCHES BEHIND YOU NOW IT WILL PROLLY BE FULL ALL THE FUCKING TIME.

>>8198006
SHIT OW GET BACK TO REALITY

>>8198006
OW
DOUBLE RAGE TO DEAL WITH DOUBLE WENCHES
NOW DEMAND THE TREE TELL YOU JUST WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON.

>>8198015

GOOD JOB OW, NOW YOU SHALL BE TWICE A RAGE
IF WE GET ENOUGH WE SHALL MAKE A PARABOLIC CURVE OF FREAKING RAGE

NOW MAKE THE BOAT WITH YOUR ANGER, MAKE SEATS FROM THE DRYAD'S BUTTCHEEKS

rolled 28 = 28

>>8198073
would fucking BURN HER and cook those SHITASS GREEN THINGS for food

rolled 88 = 88

>>8198006
OW LET'S JUST GET THE FUCK OUT THIS CRAPPY FOREST.

>>8198044
YOU GET THE FUCK BACK TO THE SITUATION AT HAND!
>>8198057
YOU QUESTION THE DYRAD ABOUT HER SHADY ACTIVITIES USING YOUR EMPOWERED RAGE TO INTIMIDATE THE FUCK OUT OF HER!

"H-hey! Calm down! I swear to Mother Gaia I thought she was alone! I just wanted to hear some music! Honest! I- whoa! Where are you going?!"

>>8198073
INTENDING TO MAKE YOURSELF A NEW BITCHING SWEET BOAT, THE STUPID TREE BITCH GETS IN THE WAY.

"What are you going to do to this tree?!"

OW, WE MUST GO TO SEA AND FIGHT A GREAT WHITE SHARK

LIKE

A

BOSS

rolled 15 = 15

>>8198310
OW THREATEN TO BURN THIS ENTIRE FOREST DOWN IF SHE DOES NOT MAKE A BOAT FOR YOU RIGHT THE FUCKING NOW.

OW USE YOUR FUCKING HANDS AND FINGERNAILS TO CARVE OUT A FUCKING HOLE IN HER BODY SO YOU AND OLGA CAN SET SAIL ONCE MORE ON YOUR DRYAD-BOAT TO CONQUER MORE LANDS

rolled 100 = 100

>>8198310
you can help CHOP DOWN SOME FUCKING TREES or we're making the boat OUT OF YOUR CORPSE

>>8198310

ASK DRYAD FOR NEW BOAT, OFFER TRADE OF VIKING PROPORTIONS, BOAT FOR NOTHING.

>>8198310
OW, WE NEED A NEW BOAT

AND GUESS WHAT, YOU PISSED ME OFF, SO THAT THERE TREE IS GOING TO BE IT

GOT ANY REASON I SHOULD SPARE IT AFTER ALL THE FUCKING TROUBLE YOU PUT ME THROUGH?

>>8198310
OW

"I'M GONNA MAKE A BOAT AND YOU'LL BE A SEA DRYAD! NOW GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY WAY!"

>>8198310
"WE'RE GOING TO MAKE A GOD DAMN BOAT AND THEN I'M GOING TO ROW MY WAY BACK HOME. THE FASTER I GET TO CUT DOWN THIS TREE THE LESS TIME I SPEND IN YOUR FOREST. I THINK WE CAN BOTH AGREE THE MORE TIME I SPEND HERE THE CHANCES OF THIS THING GOING UP IN SMOKE FROM PURE RAGE INCREASE EXPONENTIALLY.

>>8198366
FUCK YES

IT IS CHOPPING TIME

OW WHY DO YOU ALL WANT A BOAT?
WE STILL HAVE PILLAGING TO DO YOU FAGGY CUNTS

>>8198428
WE CAN'T GET OUT OF THE FUCKING ASS-CUNT OF NOWHERE IF WE DON'T HAVE A SHIT-EATING BOAT.

WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT US TO DO, FLY TO ANOTHER PLA-

OH WAIT, WE FUCKED UP THE FLYING MACHINE

SO SIT DOWN, SHUT THE FUCK, AND STAY QUIET WHILE WE GET OUR FUCKING BOAT.

ow has a loud mind :3c

passionately kiss olga and let her know that you'll be back with a boat for the both of you to sail on. assure her of your endless love for her, and your dire need to conquer so that you can present her a castle as a proposal gift - so that she might reign as queen of your empire.

rage bar converts into love bar

>>8198505

YOU SUCK.

>>8198505
... who are you?

KILL THE SPY FROM THE SOUTHLANDS

>>8198543

OW CHOP DOWN HER TREE AND MAKE HER INTO A FUCKING BOAT!

>>8198505

>>8198314
>>8198363
>>8198365
>>8198366
>>8198367
>>8198368
>>8198398
>>8198467
SUDDENLY HATING ALL GREAT WHITE SHARKS, YOU ATTEMPT TO EXPLAIN TO THE DRYAD YOUR SIDE OF THE STORY AND THEN GIVE HER, HER OPTIONS.

FOR SOME REASON SHE GROWS PALE AND A FEW FUCKING LEAVES FALL OUT OF HER "HAIR".

"Y-you can't! I'll die! There's other trees! Can't you pick an older one?!"

>>8198610
ow, why must you guys shout all the time? You need to chill out.

OW:
OLDER MEANS BIGGER AND STONGER! FIND THE BIGGEST FUCKING TREE IN THE FOREST!

>>8198657
OW
WHAT OLDER ONE. COUNT TO THREE AND IF THERE IS NO OLDER ONE IN THREE THERE IS SOME TREE-CHOPPING-BURNING TO BE HAD.

>>8198657

Incidentally, that face reminds me a lot of the Bad Guy quest...

>>8198610
<

>>8198467
OW SHE IS NO WORTHY OPPONENT.
GO CHOP THE MOTHERFUCKING BIGGEST TREE OF THE FOREST.

>>8198657
Rape her so hard she becomes human.

>>8198682
>INDISCRIMINATE TREE-CHOPPING-BURNING
OW FIXED

>>8198657
OW

"FINE, BUT I BETTER NOT HEAR ANY COMPLAINTS FROM YOU."

THEN CHOP DOWN SOME FUCKING TREES AND SAIL THE LAND BACK HOME.

>>8198657
OW

BIGGER, BADDER TREES ARE NEEDED. WHINY DRIAD TREES WON'T MAKE AN AWESOME BOAT

>>8198657
YES NEW TREE, DON'T LET THE ANGER SUBSIDE WE NEED TO KILL A SHARK. WE NEED A HUGE BOAT TO GET A HUGE SHARK. TELL HER TO LEAD US TO THE BIGGEST BADDEST MOTHERFUCKING TREE RIGHT NOW.

>>8198657
OW, HAVE HER LEAD YOU TO THE MIGHTIEST TREE OF ALL, FUCK

OW CHOP DOWN SOME OTHER TREE FOR THE HULL, BUT UPROOT HER AND USE HER AS THE FUCKING MAST!

>>8198684

>Incidentally, that face reminds me a lot of the Bad Guy quest...

funny, now I can't unsee it.

THIS FUCKING THREAD IS MAGNIFACENT.

>>8198719
OW AND STRAP OLGA TO THE MAST. AGAIN.

>>8198677
YOU FIND THE BIGGEST FUCKING TREE IN THE FOREST!

rolled 6 = 6

>>8198780
GET SWINGING THAT STICK, BOY

>>8198780
THAT TREE IS HUGE, THAT MUST MEAN IT HAS.... UH... THAT TREE IS HUGE!

RIP AND TEAR!

>>8198780
OW MOTHERFUCKING BITE IT IN HALF!

>>8198780
OW
NOW MARK IT AS YOURS AND GET TO WORK. GET THE WENCHES TO WORK TOO.

rolled 53 = 53

>>8198780
OW.
Tell the girls to leave you alone with it. Eat the Berserk mushroom.
TURN THIS TREE INTO THE BIGGEST GODDAMN SHARK KILLING BOAT ANYONE HAS EVER SEEN IN A BLIND MINDLESS KILLING RAGE.

RAGECRAFTING.

OW:
CUT THAT TREE THE FUCK DOWN AND BUILD A BOAT SO MIGHTY THAT THE ELDER FEELS YOUR MIGHT.

OW

CUT THAT MOTHERFUCKER DOWN, USE THE AXE, USE YOUR HELMET, USE OLGA, HELL, USE YOUR TEETH. LET'S SHOW THAT FUCKING TWIG WHO'S BOSS.

OW DO THE SAME FUCKING THING AS WITH OUR FIRST BOAT, TAKING LONGER OBVIOUSLY BECAUSE THIS TREE IS FUCKING HUGE. USE OUR OUR BETTER RAGE TO MAKE IT LOOK FUCKING ANGRY TO STRIKE FEAR INTO THE HEARTS OF OUR FOES. OH, AND FUCKING USE THAT DRYAD'S TREE AS A GODDAMNED MAST. SHE WON'T FUCKING DIE, IT'S A GODDAMMED BLUFF!

OW
TO HELL WITH A BOAT.
KNOCK THAT TREE DOWN, EAT BERSERKER MUSHROOM, STRAP OLGA AND DRYAD TO TREE, THROW TREE INTO HORIZON, JUMP ON TREE, SURF ON TREE.

>>8198866
OW SURF AIRBORNE TREE INTO SHARK'S GAPING MAW.

rolled 28 = 28

>>8198780
RIP AND TEAR!
RIP AND TEARS HIS TRUNK!

OW TEAR THE FUCKING TREE OUT OF THE GROUND, CARVE IT INTO A BOAT WITH BARE HANDS, UPROOT DRYAD AND STICK HER INTO THE BOAT AS A MAST!

SHE WONT DIE BECAUSE SHE CAN GET NEUTRENTS FROM THE ROTTING WOOD OF THE BOAT!

>>8198939

DRYADS DON'T WORK THAT WAY, BUT IT BRINGS TO MIND A FINE IDEA

DIG UP THE BITCH'S TREE AND STICK IT ON OUR NEW GIANT BOAT AS A MAST THAT WAT SHE CAN LIVE HANGING OFF THE FRONT OF OUR SHIP

>>8198989
THAT IS EXACTLY WHAT I WAS SUGGESTING FAGOT!

ALSO YOU FORGOT OW

>>8198800
>>8198807
>>8198808
>>8198811
>>8198813
>>8198828
>>8198830
>>8198835
>>8198866
>>8198886
>>8198904
>>8198939
"Olaf... You can't fucking be serious. You don't have an axe anymore, you're only so strong, and that tree is massive. Please. Please tell me you're going to think calmly about this for just a few minutes."

FUCKING OLGA! ALWAYS NAY-SAYING!

>>8199008
OW OUR TEETH ARE OUR AXE

GET TO WORK

rolled 16 = 16

>>8199008
OW RAGE THINKING

rolled 17 = 17

>>8199008
OW FUCKING DO IT. FUCKING SHOW HER WHY SHE'S YOUR BITCH. TEAR A BOAT OUT OF THAT TREE RIGHT NOW A WHOLE BOAT DO WHATEVER THE FUCK YOU HAVE TO DO JUST FUCKING DO IT. THIS IS TAKING TOO GODDAMN LONG.

>>8199008

OW PUNCH AND KNEED THE TREE WITH RAGE UNTIL IT ACHIEVES THE CONSISTENCY OF A RIGHT PROPER SHIP.

rolled 91 = 91

>>8199028
>>8199029
OW. THOSE ROLLS ARE TERRIBLE I WILL MAKE MINE BETTER WITH RAGE AS A TYPE. I DO AGREE WE SHOULDN'T GIVE IN TO WHINING HOWEVER.

rolled 7 = 7

OW, FUCKING PUNCH THE TREE IN THE DICK FOR MASSIVE DAMAGE!

>>8199025
>>8199028
>>8199029
>>8199043
OP HERE. I'M FUCKING LAUGHING.

rolled 42 = 42

>>8199008
TREE-PERSON-THING

YOUR ASS IS GOING TO MAKE A FINE SLED IF YOU DON'T TELL ME A WAY TO TURN THIS SHITASS TREE INTO A BOAT

rolled 61 = 61

>>8199054
OW PUNCH THE OP IN THE DICK FOR MOCKING YOU

>>8199008
SOUNDS LIKE SOMEONE'S ASKING FOR ANOTHER BLACK EYE!

>>8199043

>>8199048
YES. THIS IS HOW YOU ROLL RAGE THE NUMBERS HIGHER GODDAMN IT. TEAR THAT TREE APART.

>>8199006
>>8198989

THE DRYAD DOESN'T NEED THE NUTRIENTS, HER TREE DOES. WITHOUT HER TREE, SHE DIES, SHE WE NEED TO UPROOT HER TREE, NOT HER.

OW

Tell me this shit's being archived?

>>8199149
Its not only archived, its part of a series. This is thread 3

>>8199148
YOU KNOW WHAT I FUCKING MEANT YOU FUCKING FAGOT!

>>8199149 see >>8196251

>>8199195
>part of a series

I assumed as much.

FUCK EVER SINCE WE STARTED SEEING IN COLOR OUR RAGE HAS BEEN SLOWED. FUCK FUCK FUCK.

>>8199048
>>8199081
AFTER COLLABORATING WITH YOURSELF WHILE OLGA CONTINUES TO SUGGEST A SMALLER, LESS IMPRESSIVE TREE, YOU PERSUADE THE DRYAD AGAIN. SHE MANAGES TO TILT THE MASSIVE TREE BEFORE ALL HER MAGICIOSITY RUNS OUT!

>>8199260

OW GNAW OUT THE FUCKING ROOTS FUUUUUUUUUUUUCK

>>8199260

WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT SHIT UNDER THE TREE SHIT IT KINDA LOOKS LIKE A MINE OR SOMETHING

rolled 48 = 48

TELL THE FUCKING TREE HE BETTER CALL FOR THE AMBERLAMPS, CAUSE I'M ABOUT TO SLAP HIS SHIT!

rolled 31 = 31

>>8199298

>>8199260
OW

SUMMON ALL THE RAGE I HAVE FROM THE DEPTHS OF MY FURY AND CHANNEL IT INTO FINISHING THAT SONUVABITCH TREE OFF

>Biggest fucking tree in the forest

Are you guys compensating for something?

>>8199367

we are compensating for our lack of vehicular transportation.

rolled 35 = 35

>>8199260
OW FUCKING RAGE HEADBUTT IT TO SUBMISSION

>>8199298
>>8199354
>>8199364
>>8199404
SACRIFICE TEMPORARY LEVEL 3 RAGE TO COMPLETE THY TASK?

IF SO, ROLL 1D100+30!

rolled 7 + 30 = 37

>>8199438
I SEE NO OTHER OPTION, RAGE CRAFTING GO!

rolled 48 + 30 = 78

ARHHHHHHHHHHHHHG

>>8199438

>>8199438
BY THE POWERS OF FURY AND MIGHT

THIS SUCKING FUCKING TREE BASTARD WILL BECOME MY NEW BOAT

RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGE

rolled 49 = 49

>>8199438
FUCKING WASTE. YOUR NORMAL RAGE SHOULD BE ENOUGH FOR A FUCKING STICK OF WOOD

THOSE ARE SOME CRAPPY ROLLS

rolled 50 + 30 = 80

>>8199496
SO ANGRY I FORGOT TO DO THE DICE THING PROPERLY

FUUUUUUUUUUU

rolled 4 + 30 = 34

>>8199467
>>8199438
RAAAAAAGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

rolled 78 + 30 = 108

>>8199508
INDEED.

OW LETS GET THAT MOTHERFUCKHEN TREE AND THEN WE GO AND GET SOME MOTHERFUCKIN SHARKS MOTHERFUCKER MOTHERFUCKER
MOTHERFUCKER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

rolled 31 = 31

YOU DUMBASSES, NONE OF YOU CAUGHT HIS ATTENTION

OW, BY THE POWER OF WHISTLEAXE, SUMMON FORTH THE GREAT, ICY RAGE OF THE AESIR AND FATHER ODIN!

rolled 78 + 30 = 108

FUCK ALL OF YOU I AM RAGE KING MACHINE FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
CCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCK
THIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIS
TREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

OW
NOT HAVING AN AXE IS FUCKING STUPID AS ALL HELL, WE NEED TO FIND A NEW ONE, SERIOUSLY BERSERKERS NEED AXES, THIS IS BULLSHIT

rolled 66 + 30 = 96

>>8199577
YOU DIDN'T DO IT RIGHT EITHER FAGGOT

>OW, BY THE POWER OF WHISTLEAXE, SUMMON FORTH THE GREAT, ICY RAGE OF THE AESIR AND FATHER ODIN!

FUCK YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH

>>8199459
FAIL!

YOUR RAGE LOWERS BACK TO LEVEL 2!
>>8199519
NICE ROLL! TOO BAD IT WAS LATE! NOW YOU'LL HAVE TO SIT AROUND IN A GAY FOREST UNTIL THE NEXT DAY WHEN THAT STUPID TREE WOMAN REGAINS HER MAGICIOCITY POWER! THAT OR USE MORE RAGE AND TRY AGAIN! LUCKY FOR YOU YOUR RAGE WILL COME BACK AFTER A SHORT TIME SINCE YOU LEVELED IT.

>>8199519
>= 108
>>8199591
>= 108
>This post
>mind = blown

>>8199617
OP HERE! HOLY SHIT.

rolled 93 = 93

LET'S THINK ABOUT THIS CALMLY GUYS. I'M SURE THERE'S A PEACEFUL SOLUTION HERE SOMEWHERE.

>>8199603
OW Tell Olga to jabber more useless crap to piss us off and help rebuild our rage

rolled 19 + 30 = 49

>>8199603
FUCK MAN FUCKING FUCK FUCK FUUUUUUCK

GOD DAMN IT RAGE RAGE RAGE.

GRAB THE DYRAD AND OUR WENCH'S TITS TILL WE GET ANGRY DUE TO THEIR BITCHING ABOUT IT.

>>8199617
Look at the post endings well

FOOKING MAGICIOSITY

OW, I THINK THOSE MUST BE WORTH SOMETHING

>>8199659

... wait, what?

KILL EVERYTHING!

rolled 9 = 9

>>8199603
OW NICE FAIL.
NOW SEARCH THE NEAREST TOWN TO PILLAGE AND SHIT. OR SOMETHING BIG AND SCARY IN THE FOREST TO RIP'N'TEAR.
WHICHEVER COMES FIRST.

>>8199717
WHAT WAS THAT? FAIL? THE THING YOU JUST DID?

SIT DOWN AND SHUT THE FUCK, BOYO.

rolled 51 = 51

OW
STANDING AROUND DOING NOTHING IS MAKING YOU GAY, GO RAPE HEAPS OF SHIT.

>>8199659
THEY WILL BITCH ENDLESSLY AND MAKE US EXTRA ANGRY IF WE SEXUALLY HARASS THEM.

>>8199804
OW BEST PLAN EVER

>>8199775
YEAH I'LL ADMIT THAT WAS SHITFAIL.
BUT DON'T GO CALLING ME BOYO YOU WEEABOO PISSFAGGOT.

YELL AT THE ODIN-DAMNED TREE UNTIL IT FORMS ITSELF INTO A FUCKING BOAT. IM SICK OF THIS BADGER DICK CUNT TREE

>>8199651
IT'S ANNOYING, BUT NOT AS MADDENING AS YOU HOPE! FUCK, YOU'RE TO USED TO HER SHIT FOR IT TO DO MORE THAN MAINTAIN YOUR RAGE!
>>8199675
THIS IS TRUE! DUE TO THE ANCIENT TREE GETTING IT'S SHIT TILTED BY A DRYAD EXPENDING ALL OF HER MAGIC TO TRY AND KILL IT, A MAGIC AXE SHOWS THE FUCK UP!

>>8199943
OW

GIVE ODIN A BROFIST IN THANKS, THEN CUT THE FUCK OUT OF THAT TREE

rolled 13 = 13

>>8199943
THIS TREE STOOD FOR 400 YEARS FOR THE DAY I WOULD COME TO END ITS FUCKING MISERY

CHOP CHOP WOODEY FUCKER

rolled 43 = 43

OW NOW CUT THAT TREE DOWN! VERTICALLY!

FUCK YEAH MAGIC AXE, NOW LET'S GET TO CHOPPING.

THIS IS TAKING FOREVER OP THIS IS ABOUT VIKINGS WE SHOULD BE KILLING DRINKING OR FEELING UP ONE OF THESE BITCHES.

FUCK.

>>8199981
FUCK YEAH! THAT TREE IS FUCKING DEAD! YOU GIVE ODIN A MASSIVE BROFIST AND FUCKING GET TO WORK!

>>8200118
FUCK YEAH, LET'S CRAFT THIS SHIT AND UPROOT THE DRYAD AND HER TREE FOR OUR MAST.

ALSO JESUS CHRIST FUCK WE'RE AUTOSAGING.

OW FUCK LAUNCH INTO A GODDAMN NEW THREAD.

>>8200118

IS GETTING A BROFIST FROM ODIN HIMSELF GOOD ENOUGH FOR THAT CUNT OF AN ELDER? FOR THAT SHITTY QUEST THING? OR DID YOU DO THAT I FORGET FUCK

>>8200118
OW NOW WE HAVE HIM RIGHT WHERE WE WANT HIM

TEAR ODIN DOWN FROM THE SKYYYYYY

>>8200185
OP HERE. FUCK NO, I AM NOT LAUNCHING INTO A NEW THREAD.

Discuss the boat specifics if you want, I'll check the archive for this later. Also, you might want to plan how you're going to move this massive ship out to sea as it is.

>>8200256
...FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

WE'RE GONNA GET THE BITCH OF A DRYAD TO USE HER WOODLAND FRIENDS TO MOVE US OVERLAND OR WE'RE MAKING HER TREE INTO A FUCKING MAST.

>>8200256
FUCK. FUCK. FUUUUCK.

CAN'T WE JUST GET ODIN TO MOVE IT WHILE HE'S BROFISTING US!?

>>8200256
OW

WE'VE GOT TO SHOW ODIN WE'RE BADASS ENOUGH TO MAKE OUR OWN BOAT. I VOTE FOR MODERN DAY BATTLESHIP STYLE. MADE OUT OF SUPERWOOD. WE NEED GIANT CANNONS. AND TREE LASERS.

>>8200296
>>8200317

SURELY THERE ARE SOME VILLAGERS ON THIS FUCKISLAND THAT WE CAN COERCE INTO LAUNCHING THE SHIP TO SEA

A NEW THREAD TOMORROW OP?

>>8200536
NOT ENTIRELY SURE! THINKING ABOUT IT. ON A RELATED NOTE, I BETTER NOT ACTUALLY HAVE TO THINK UP A REAL BALLAD. IF ANYTHING I'D JUST END UP STEALING THE IMMIGRANT SONG!

>>8200668

OF COURSE YOU DON'T HAVE TO THINK UP A REAL BALLAD THAT WOULD JUST BE RETARDED.

YOU KNOW HOW IN MARVEL COMICS, WHEN THEY ZOOM IN ON BLACKBOLT ABOUT TO SAY SOMETHING, AND THEN THE NEXT PANEL IS A TWO-PAGE SPREAD OF EVERYONE GETTING ROCKED THE FUCK OUT WITHIN A 20 MILE RADIUS?

JUST PULL SOMETHING LIKE THAT.

OLAF'S VIKING RAGE BEING EVOKED IN SONG AND MELTING EVERYONE'S FUCKING FACES.

>>8200668
OW IS AN ANCESTOR OF JIMMY PAIGE OF COURSE, SO THE IMMIGRANT SONG SHOULD BE HIS BALLAD