Well my life lacks all meaning now. Thanks OP.

What's with the pipe? I mean, I understand everything else... but the pipe...?

>>12624545

Barbarians enjoy a good smoke.

His pipe makes all the difference.

"Do you mind if I smoke?"

>>12624545
It's for smoking raw materia. Gets in the bloodstream quicker that way.

>>12624545

Pipes = manly. Are you that womanly you don't have a pipe?

>>12624545

This pic makes me wonder what Barrett would look like if you increases his manliness by the same proportion Cloud's manliness was increased.

>>12624545
BECAUSE WE MUST SPLIT OUR LUNGS WITH BLOOD AND THUNDEEERR!

>>12624560
>>12624559
>>12624558
>>12624557
Well yeah, but that seems to be a rather fancy pipe for a Barbarian. Is he a cultured Barbarian?

>>12624571

You got the idea. On the same note, someone make an art of Severus Snape after a level or two.

Pic from the same guy. GENZOMAN on the devarts

>>12624568
Gun arm replaced with gun body.

>>12624602
Is that a cigar?

>>12624602
Genzoman drawns ridiculously sexualised women but I approve of these pictures in a funny way.

>>12624621

Damn straight that's a cigar.

>>12624615
It's just all gun. Everywhere.

>>12624523
see anime would be alot better if guys actually looked like fucking guys

> locomotive idiaster

>>12624705
>see anime would be alot better if guys actually looked like fucking MAN-MOUNTAINS OF BLOOD AND STEEL DESCENDED FROM VALHALLA TO DELIVER THE MANPOCALYPSE UPON OUR MORTAL COIL

Fixed that for you.

>>12624568

Maybe just maybe things would be better with a variety of main characters instead of a few stereotypes.

>>12624722
way too easilly entertained
>lol'd hard

>>12624722

>MANPOCALYPSE

LET IT BE SO

>>12624705
>see anime would look better if it was all BALD MEREENS

>>12624839
with spiked hair that can pierce the heavens and beyond

>>12624829

Note that Sam already had a level, which is why he was better.

>>12624914
I think he might have had two. Sam was badass, motherfucker CARRIED FRODO UP A FUCKING MOUNTAIN!!!

Meh. The generic muscle bound barbarian with arms thicker than his head is every bit as insipid and awful as the tragic bishi.

>>12624945
Barbarians don't wax their chest.

>>12624914
You forgot he was supposed to be a barbarian. Let me fix that for you.

So... what class took dante to level up like this?

>>12624991

Severe level drain

i don't think it's taking a level in barbarian

i think it's taking a level in beard

>>12625017

Or trying to look like your father was Solid Snake.

>>12624991
Dante looks much more badass in that picture than he does as an impossibly-perfect haired extremely fashion conscious devil warrior. He looks like he just got in a fight with a bunch of demons, ripped out there hearts and got the shit kicked out of him doing so.

>>12624991

He took a level in meth addict

>>12625035

...he looks like a meth-head that got the shit beat out of him. Probably a $5 rentboy of a meth-head.

>>12625035
I always assumed Dante was a parody of over-the-top American action heroes. It's the only way I can stand the faggotry of the DMC games. DMC 3 is almost more douchebaggery than any one man can take.

>>12625056
You should play Resident Evil 4. Compared to Leon's over the top hero performance, Dante is small time.

i wonder if i have a beard folder oh wait i do

>>12625046

To be fair, demon fighting takes a lot of energy, so the meth probably helps.

That or his john roughed him up.

Old, but still awesome as shit.

>>12625066
>beard

That's nothing but a little fuzz, kid.

THIS is a beard.

>>12625061
I have. The difference is that Leon doesn't come off as a parody, just an insufferably annoying "cool" character. Sort of like a Schwarzenegger without the charm. A Jean Claude Van Damme or Steven Seagal, if you will.

Meanwhile, DMC 3 has Dante ride a motorcycle up a wall, use said motorcycle as some kind of nunchuk, and then pose as it explodes. I can only assume this was done tongue-in-cheek, but if it was supposed to be taken as awesome in a non-ironic fashion, the people responsible for that scene need to die. Also, he's really trying way too hard to look cool, and I can only assume this is an attempt to highlight his youth by excessive posturing.

>>12625077
Yeah, but eventually all your teeth fall out and you just mumble all the time then you crash your motorcycle on the way to the latest exorcism and the police come and pick you up but you're too far gone man just too far gone and they lock you up but the judge won't be in for thirty days but you only have three days to stop the moon demon and that's it fucking game over man end of the fucking world.

>>12625077

>To be fair, demon fighting is probably caused by a lot of meth.

FTFY

There's a great one of Popeye in powered armor.
How they made popeye more manly is actually a mystery to me, but it happened.

>>12625103
Well, yeah, it's intentionally self-effacing. Just like Bayonetta.

>>12625110

SMOKE THE MAGIC CRYSTALS, SEE THE INVISIBLE DEMONS

>>12625105

Truth, thats why I get coked up whenever I have to fight imaginary super beasts.

>>12625110
So what we're saying is: Dante with the white hair and trenchcoat - meth delusion. Rentboy meth addict Dante - actual truth.

>>12625137
>>12625110
That's a pretty good justification for taking meth. If I don't take meth, I won't be able to fight the demons plotting to destroy the world. I mean, that would convince me.

>>12625123
I didn't think it worked as well in Bayonetta. The character just wasn't fun enough to really pull it off. Besides, all that sexual innuendo just wasn't as awesome as cheesy one-liners.

Then again, I guess analyzing the story elements and characterization in games like DMC and Bayonetta kind of means I've gone full retard.

>>12625182
We've all done it before, man. Everyone goes full retard every now and then.

>>12625143

Yeah Imagine Black Haired Dante screaming and flailing his arms fighting invisible demons in front of a supermarket.

then take the white haired super action hero shit and apply it to his psychotic fantasy and it all makes sense.

>>12625182
Bayonetta wasn't meant to be poking fun at the action hero trope, she was supposed to be poking fun at the over sexualized heroine trope. Hence why every single aspect of the character is fetishized.

>>12625182
Pretty much. Next you'll start on the plot of Ninja Gaiden.

Speaking of which, there was a thread on /v/ a while back. Last tv show you watched meets last game you played, this is the new game. For me, Mad Men and Ninja Gaiden Black. That would be some freaky shit.

>>12625192

So next time you see an insane hobo eating a dead pigeon, you'll understand he is doing it for all of humanity.

>>12625192
Each boss fight is actually a psychotic episode induced by him running so low on cash he has to go out looking for any john he can find. That lava spider is actually Pablo, a 400lb Mexican cannery worker n who lives in an apartment with no shower and has a scat fetish.

>>12625216
What about when said insane hobo walked into my liquorstore not wearing shorts freshly after shitting himself because he's too drunk?

>>12624705
This is indeed true. I give props to Bleach for making sure all the characters with really high physical strength are ripped men. Of course, they've got nothing on our good friend Guts of Berserker fame.....

One anime that really got me on this issue was InuYasha. Yeah, his demonic heritage gives him superstrength, but come on. You don't have the body of a 15 year old AND have a right hook feared by many demons twice your size. I'm not asking that be all Hulked up and stuff, I'm just thinking that he should have a torso twice as wide as any other man's torso and biceps thicker than a woman's waist.

>>12624954
BUT AT LEAST THEY WOULD LOOK LIKE FUCKING MEN. NOT LIKE 12 YEAR OLD GIRLS WHO DON'T EAT 3 SQUARE MEALS A DAY. SEPHIROTH!

>>12625194
I understood that, but it just didn't work as well for me. It was essentially an action game where the heroine wasn't an over-the-top crazy action girl in the same sense as Dante. I actually missed him using a demon as a skateboard while eating a slice of pizza when all I got was endless insinuations that Bayonetta enjoyed being tied up and spanked in bed.

The strip-off with the angel slut did make me chuckle, though.

>>12625236
He was literally duelling his evil brother right at that very moment.

>>12625236

Does your liquor store carry buffalo trace? If no, then you deserved that.

Otherwise, shitting is pants was him fighting the giant owl, do you want a giant owl in your neighborhood, wearing baggy pants, listening to rap music and dating your daughter?

>>12625233

He thinks his dad is a demon because his mom didn't know who he was, other then one of her johns.

Him fighting demons (servicing the other johns) becomes disturbingly fruedian.

>>12625233
>That lava spider is actually Pablo, a 400lb Mexican cannery worker n who lives in an apartment with no shower and has a scat fetish.
SO THAT'S WHY EVERY BOSS IN DMC JUST KEPT COMING! IT ALL MAKES PERFECT SENSE!

>>12625247
>BUT AT LEAST THEY WOULD LOOK LIKE FUCKING MEN. NOT LIKE 12 YEAR OLD GIRLS WHO DON'T EAT 3 SQUARE MEALS A DAY. SEPHIROTH!

No, being a man is about attitude. It's not about being covered in muscles. What you're talking about is a roid monkey. This is not the same thing as a man.

>>12625271
>KEPT COMING
I see what you did there. And I did not enjoy it.

>>12625278

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SCkxYhyycnk&feature=related

>>12625267
>Does your liquor store carry buffalo trace? If no, then you deserved that.

No, we carry liquor worth drinking.

>Otherwise, shitting is pants was him fighting the giant owl, do you want a giant owl in your neighborhood, wearing baggy pants, listening to rap music and dating your daughter?

Damn owls. They need to quit it with the shiny clothing and get a fucking job.

>>12625287
Neither did Dante. But he needs another meth fix so he can save the earth.

>>12625300

You have no taste in bourbon.

But at least you don't cotton to those damn filthy owls. Owls ruined detroit.

>>12625317
Sorry, I'm a Maker's Mark man. Surely there's room enough on this board for two psychotic, owl hating gun-nuts with very specific tastes in bourbon who refuse to let those damned owls have their way.

>>12625317
This fucker just moved in next door.

>>12625278
>No, being a man is about attitude.
See.....this is where your argument falls apart.

First of all, the guys I'm talking about are capable of some pretty amazing physical feats....yet for the most part they're about as skinny as a 12 year old girl. This removes my suspension of disbelief and shatters my immersion.

Second....they don't even act like men. They're oversensitive, whiny little bitches. Why are these guys the main protagonists/antagonists? Hell, why do they even get fangirls?

>>12625338
You best nip that shit in the bud. You let one in the neighborhood, and soon the place is just gonna be lousy with owls. You'll never get any sleep since they'll be playing rap music all the time and they'll drive property values right into the ground.

>>12625347
They're about as manly as over aggressive roid monkeys.

>>12625337

WHEAT BOURBON? HERESY!

I found one way to get the damn owls out of my neighborhood, they seem to hate the letter "t" so I built a big one and lit in on fire, so they all could see it.

Scared em right out of the neighborhood, but I guess flaming ts aren't kosher, or maybe it was on shabbos or something, cause the weinsteins freaked the hell out when they saw it.

>>12625353
I can't even understand their music. It is just atonal hooting that they rub wings up against each other to.

>>12625363
>HERESY

Bah says I.

What the fuck is up their ass? You got rid of them damn owls didn't you? Sure, you probably violated city fire laws, but who cares about that crap?

>>12625338

MAYBE IF YOU SPENT YOUR WELFARE CHECK ON A PROPER NEST INSTEAD OF RIMS THE DAMN EGGS WOULDN'T KEEP FALLING OUT!

>>12625347
Girly guys get fangirls because so many girls are on the pill. This fucks with their hormones and makes them more attracted to effeminate men.
Then even those who aren't on the pill can be swayed by peer pressure. What starts as a medically-induced anomaly becomes a cultural phenomenon thanks to herd mentality.

>>12625362
>oversensitive, whiny little bitches with the bodies of 12 year olds
>overly aggressive roid monkeys
>equally manly

>>12625399
I blame the owls.

>>12625406

The good women are looking for someone like their father.

That's why I drink so much and act so abusively.

>>12625406
One is a sissy, the other is an animal. Neither is fit to call himself a man.

Hey guys, what's going on in this thread? Talk of manly men and sensitive men you say? Let us train for a while then relax and tell tales of old comrades and shed tears for having known, loved, and lost them.

>>12625317
>>12625363
Bourbon is a goddamn insult to alcohol. Proper whiskey is where it's at. Damn yanks and your cheeseburgers and Jack Daniel's. At least go for a Glenfiddich or a Laphroaig or something.

Or if you're just out to get drunk, vodka or tequila always works just fine. No need to ruin perfectly good whiskey.

>>12625425

Nice try anon, but I wont fall for gay sex so easily this time.

>>12625420
>>12625413

Owls are animals, and Owls are trying to steal all the good women.

>>12625430
>Bourbon is a goddamn insult to alcohol.
>tequila always works just fine.
>mfw

>>12625430
Yeah, because making whiskey out of corn is such an awful thing to do. Go back to your boot-leather tasting whiskey, you self important Euro.

Aside from that, Canadian Whiskey is where it's at.

By the way, Jack Daniel's isn't bourbon. If you knew a damn thing about liquor you'd know that. To be a bourbon, the mash has to be at least 50% corn, which Jack Daniel's is not.

Goddamn owls spraypainted "Hoot 55-7" all over the wall of my apartment building. Under it is an owl holding an assault rifle flashing her tits.

What does that even mean? And since when do owls even have tits? Fucking owls...

>>12625430

Tequila is mexican ditch water, and bourbon is superior to nancy euro whiskey. The kicken chicken at 101 proof is an excellent way to go from rational to awesome in 5 minutes flat.

>>12625450
I'm kind of curious to where the guy going on about Scotaboo superior whiskey is from. I'm guess not Scotland because he ain't spelling it whisky.

>>12625459
Fucking owls stole my car and went joyriding with it. When I got it back it reeked of meth and there were empty bottles of malt liquor and owl pellets everywhere inside of it.

>>12625450

I have never been able to drink Yukon Jack without causing at least $100 in property damage.

>>12625450
Wow, someone's a bit sore when it comes to alcohol. It was mostly meant as a joke. I personally don't like bourbon, which is also why I know nothing about it other than that it tastes bad, but you're free to drink as much of it as you want.

>>12625475
That only happens when I decide to scientifically test whether or not whiskey makes a viable replacement for water.

It does, but only until I wind up puking on my pant leg and praying to Odin for the strength to overcome my vomiting.

>>12625491
>praying to Odin
>not drinking mead
No wonder you fuckup, fuckup. You got some owl blood in you son?

>>12625437
>Nice try anon, but I wont fall for gay sex so easily this time.
But it was enjoyed by some of the manliest men in human history! The Egyptians, Spartans, Samurai, the Aztecs, the Knights Templar...

>>12625491
Silly anon, Thor was the one known for his ability to hold his drink.

>>12625510
The vikings had more varieties of alcohol than mead.

>>12625521
Indeed. On top of that, it is Thor who protects the common man, not Odin. But liquor makes you do silly things.

>>12625510

He sounds like one o them howls you hear about, human on the outside, owl on the inside. We like to hang em from trees cause thats where owls belong.

Many have tried to turn Wasteland Warrior gay, but so far it has been ineffective. Will this thread be able to do what others have not?

>>12625547
Oh yeah? I know you're a bit of a night person yourself. How do I know you don't got a bit o' owl in yas?

I gather Wasteland Warrior actually has a pretty good taste in alcohol when he's not drinking fucking everclear.

No wonder owls are so dangerous. They've been around, evolving, for millions of years, yet their design is so simple...

>>12625560
Everclear is how man punishes himself for his sins.

>>12625420
>implying that the line between beast and man isn't a thin we one that we often tread on
>>12625511
>Not vikings

>>12625550
The only justification WW has for not being gay at this point is "balls didn't touch... on purpose".

>>12625557

Them feathers in your hair? You gonna hoot at me boy?

>>12625437
>>12625399
>>12625406
>>12625413
>>12625414
>>12625420
QFT.
>btw this is all true

>>12625541
Fun fact, Odin took care of pretty much everyone. All Thor really did was dick around and kill a bunch of giants. From what I can remember, he only had two personal servants. There is even a story where Odin taunts Thor, saying that while he gets all the warriors, Thor only gets the left-overs Odin doesn't want.

>>12625566

Everclear is the water of life, if I survive I gain new insight and powers.

Only my eyes go bloodshot, instead of blue within blue

>>12625578
I think you might be projecting. Tell me of your father; did he ever stay up late at night just to hoot outside your door? Did you fantasize about him swooping down upon you silently and tearing you apart like a small rodent?

>>12625581
>Fun fact, Odin took care of pretty much everyone
By killing them when they become useful to him.

>>12625581
Thor was traditionally the god of the common man. Being an important god of weather, he was frequently prayed to by farmers for rain and the like.

>>12625589
"Don't try your powers on me, witch! Try looking into that place where you dare not look. You'll find me there, throwing up on you!"

>>12625591

Just cause my dad kept disemboweling and consuming my pet hamsters doesn't mean he was an owl...

He was probably busy fighting demons, thats why his teeth fell out.

>>12625608
Denial isn't a river in Egypt.

>>12625614

LA LA LA LA I CANT HEAR YOU OVER SUPPRESSING THE MEMORIES WITH ALCOHOL

>>12625608

It's okay, WW. You're among friends here, like minded rapists and freaks. You can open up to us, we're here for you.

>>12625623
FACE YOUR OWL NATURE AND CLAIM YOUR BIRTHRIGHT THAT IS SILENTLY SWOOPING DOWN UPON BOTTLES OF MALT LIQUOR WHILE WEARING ONLY THE SHINIEST OF SHIRTS.

>>12625625
I'm not here for no gay owl boy.

>>12625592
Actually, he just pretty much killed everyone, whether it was convenient or not. He was a giant dick, and proud of it. One story has him kill nine farmers in a way that will ensure they never reach Valhalla just so he can get a taste of some magic mead. This is the wisest god of them all. He could easily just trick them into leaving instead of having them all die, he just didn't feel like it.

Then he fucked a giant until she'd let him have some magic mead, drank it all instead of the three mouthfuls he promised, and turned into an eagle and flew away. He would later brag about all of this to Thor, which I always found kind of creepy. What son wants to hear his dad brag about all the women he's fucked?

>>12625567
We really don't know. All we know for sure is that after Christianity was adopted by the vikings, they instituted harsh laws against homosexuality.

>>12625625

Nice try anon, but getting me drunk and emotionally vulnerable won't yield mansex. You'll need more liquor and trappery for that.

>>12625638
They did that everywhere.

>>12625633
Maybe they should've shared their mead with the Allfather....

I know Odin comes down and asks me for my imported Coca-Cola, i'll give him some.

>>12625638
As I recall, they only instituted those against being the receiving partner. Being called an argr as a free man was an offense you had to answer with a challenge or face outlawry.

>>12625598
That actually fell more within Freyr's domain, being the god of farming and weather. Thor was quite specifically the god of thunder (in addition to his many other titles, such as god of drinking and punching shit in the face). His position as a common man's god was mostly due to him being the protector of mankind.

>>12625687
Hmm, I stand corrected. But I thought the Norse viewed the Vanir as bad mojo?

>>12625697
Not really. See, the Aesir and Vanir went to war. The Vanir won, but the war fucked shit up something tremendous. To seal the truce, each side gave up two of their own number to the other side. The Aesir got Freyr and Freyja, who were both considered as much proper gods as Thor or Tyr. The Vanir received Mimer and some other guy I can't remember. There's not really much of a difference between Aesir and Vanir. They were basically just two different tribes who were occasionally at odds with one another. The real assholes were the giants.

So this thread has gone from manly men, to great beards, to meth, to proper alcohol, to nigger/owls, to trying to push gay sex on Wasteland Warrior, before finally settling on ancient Norse Mythology?

I don't say this enough, but I love you /tg/. I really do.

>>12625774
You say that now, but you won't respect me in the morning.

Mah thread derailed. Needs moar barbarian. Pic relatedly Hermoine-ey.

>>12626457
BRAINS.....AND BRAWN! SHE'S INVINCIBLE!

>>12626457
I'd snoosnoo it.

>>12626457
>Barbarian + Wizard
>Rage Mage
There's a PMS joke in there somewhere, I just can't piece it together

>>12626495
Dammit man, try harder! Just let the creative fluids flow.