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07/15/10(Thu)22:02 No.11158635>>11158609 Simple Tuesday evening, 10 at night, mother is out and 5 year old daughter is in bed. Our dear Governor is sitting in his favorite leather chair, browsing the kind of porn you get 10 years jail, 5 years probation for, when his little sweetheart starts bounding downstairs, teddy-bear in hand.
"Daddy?" She says, yawning a bit as he closed his laptop and turns.
"Yes Princess?" He smiles in a way only a blue balled government official can.
In her sweetest voice, she slowly, softly sings.
"Your lights are on, but you're not home Your will is not your own You're heart sweats and teeth grind Another kiss and you'll be mine"
She suddenly drops the big, purple, smiling bear. From behind she pulls the sawed off shotgun "Daddy dearest" keeps in the master bedroom for "self defense". Quick squeeze of the trigger for both barrels and the Governor is no more.
The gun kicks and knocks out a few of my teeth, but it's alright, it will just confirm the police's suspiscion that it was all an accident. I calmly drop the weapon, stumble through what remains of the governors head on the floor, and pick up the phone. In my best sob I explain what happened as a distraught and confused 5 year old would, then leave her body.
She'll have a few problems in life, but I figure it will be balanced out by a best selling book she'll no doubt write later in life. I've taken out a corrupt polititian, and the event is so traumatic that even the staunchest supporters of gun rights begin to press for tighter controls.
Wife probably won't give a shit, they were cheating on eachother so what the hell ever |