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  • File : 1319679565.gif-(38 KB, 341x330, earth.gif)
    38 KB EVO Quest - Part II OP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/26/11(Wed)21:39 No.16748063  
    Continued from >>16745256

    You... you are still not quite sure what you are.

    But you're an overgrown cave salamander with some strange powers, bizarre mutations, and you are currently piloting the skeleton of a bear that you raised with your necromantic powers and fortified with webs that you shot from your ass. And you're going to go back to your home cave to look for stones.

    ... it's been a strange, strange day.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)21:41 No.16748085
    BLORP!
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)21:42 No.16748102
    >>16748063
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yj-gYV6drmc&feature=channel_video_title
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)21:43 No.16748110
    rolled 2 = 2

    >>16748063
    The cave, it beckons...
    HOWEVER!
    We left some perfectly good meals back there in the form of dead lizard folk. That should be resolved before we move on, as our appetite is as infinite as our potential.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)21:43 No.16748114
    rolled 9 = 9

    Forward ho
    >> OP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/26/11(Wed)21:43 No.16748115
    >>16748063
    You approach your old home cave; it's a little smaller than you remembered it, now that you're in a giant bear skeleton, but you pilot your minion through the entrance with ease. The dead woodsfolk is still there, though her head's been mashed to paste; you can still see her clothes, though, and her iron necklace is-

    ... holy shit.

    Holy shit, it's gone. You look around, but you have no goddamn clue where it's gone. On closer inspection, her head looks MORE mashed than you remembered, probably to get that clamp off her neck.

    >COMMAND?
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)21:44 No.16748127
    rolled 10 = 10

    >>16748110
    Web shot the corpses and attach them to Tank-bear. Drag their dead bodies across the jungle. we have the torque. Do it quick though! The cave OP the CAVE!

    What if our elf host woke up and ran away?!
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)21:45 No.16748130
    rolled 13 = 13

    >>16748110
    Agreed. WE MUST FEED.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)21:45 No.16748137
    rolled 14 = 14

    >>16748115
    eat the woodfolk
    eat the lizards
    and track the fucker who stole out necklace!
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)21:46 No.16748145
    rolled 9 = 9

    >>16748115
    Raise her. Gleam any information about her attacker if possible, if not saddle her up on the Bear-ghoul. Leave the cave and look for any obviously disturbed foliage that we didn't create.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)21:46 No.16748148
    rolled 3 = 3

    >>16748115
    Too late to eat, unfortunate. First, consume these corpses. Second, well, no idea. Back out and to the light we saw earlier as it is the only other object of interest that hasn't died yet I suppose.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)21:47 No.16748156
    dice+1d20
    Look for the rock from the elf you ate.
    Eat first host.
    Use bear-nose to track the thief!
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)21:47 No.16748162
    rolled 16 = 16

    Attach their bodies to the bear. Their bodies will become part of the war machine.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)21:47 No.16748167
    rolled 5 = 5

    >>16748156
    >dice+1d20
    Dammit.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)21:47 No.16748169
    rolled 6 = 6

    >>16748115
    Wellp, this is a conundrum. I say we head in the direction of the birds from earlier
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)21:48 No.16748172
    rolled 7 = 7

    >>16748145
    Cant, skelly-bear-mobile is it for now, until we construct additional blorp.

    Eat corpse. Go back eat lizard corpse. Stone is most likely with lizard corpse. Eat stone. Acquire blorp.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)21:48 No.16748174
    remember guys a fat BLORP is a evolving BLORP

    i really hope some day this nice BLORP will be able to eat a tarrasque all alone
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)21:49 No.16748189
    rolled 16 = 16

    >>16748172
    WE REQUIRE MORE BLORP
    Also, this, then attack the lights from earlier.
    >> OP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/26/11(Wed)21:53 No.16748236
    >>16748162
    >>16748189
    You can't raise the woodfolk unless you release your hold on the bear. And dammt, you fought too long and hard to throw away its skeleton away now!

    So you command the bear's bones to pick up the mangled corpse and drape it across its back. You start drooling, but console your rumbly stomach by rationalizing that it's either 1) armor, 2) a future minion, or 3) take-out.

    While you're at it, you decide to go back to where you killed the Lizards, and maybe eat them too. It's not too difficult to backtrack; your bear left a pretty big swath of crushed bushes in its wake, and soon enough, you're at the bodies.

    ... but the bodies seem to be accompanied by more Lizards this time. Five of them, in fact, and one was rifling through Bright-Plume's stuff before it looked up and saw you.

    You think you see a glint of metal in that one's claws.

    >COMMAND?
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)21:55 No.16748259
    rolled 15 = 15

    >>16748236
    HACK SLASH CRUSH THEM TO BITS
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)21:56 No.16748265
    rolled 13 = 13

    Swing the elf corpse at them to distract them, then KILL THEM ALL with bear power. And take the shiny thing.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)21:56 No.16748270
    >>16748236
    STONNNNNES! Kill them and devour everything in the clearing.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)21:56 No.16748271
    rolled 8 = 8

    >>16748236
    Spin sling the trinket into our possession. Then hop off and let Bear-ghoul take care of the interlopers. We have rocks to ingest.

    Leave on of them alive if possible. We haven't really had the time to utilize our upgrade intelligence and brain absorbing power since we got it. Might be nice to learn about the world around us.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)21:56 No.16748276
    rolled 5 = 5

    >>16748236
    Skeletal bears feel no pain, no remorse, and no hatred. Thus, we kill them using it, disengage from it, consume corpses, and collect the shiny thing. In that order.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)21:57 No.16748281
    rolled 20 = 20

    >>16748270
    Forgot roll.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)21:57 No.16748282
    >>16748236
    only one wearing metal? kill and eat them all, leave only but cloth and bones

    all wearing metal? use the bear as decoy and sneak on the back os the strongest and calm aura the fucker while you suck his soul
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)21:58 No.16748296
    rolled 16 = 16

    >>16748259
    Maybe try shooting some web at the glinty metal thing and pulling it into our magnificent fortress? Relying on the bear and elf for armor incase of lizardman beatdowns
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:00 No.16748317
    rolled 16 = 16

    >>16748282
    forgot to roll
    oh and use web in case only one is wearing metal
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:02 No.16748340
    rolled 18 = 18

    >>16748236
    FUCK EM UP, BLORP FOR THE BLORP GOD
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:02 No.16748343
    rolled 6 = 6

    BLORP

    And then kill the fucks.
    >> OP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/26/11(Wed)22:03 No.16748352
    >>16748281
    >>16748259
    Fuckers! THOSE STONES ARE FUCKING YOURS.

    The Lizards barely have time to raise their weapons before Bearbones falls upon them with a mighty, fear-inducing BLORP; the Lizard with the metal is slammed into the ground underneath a paw, breaking its back instantly, and two more fall as Bearbones dices them with one swipe of its claws. Your stumpy little tail wiggling in excitement, you turn to deal with the other two-

    - and find yourself facing a storm of leaves. You literally cannot see a thing, and you hurriedly snap at one or two stray leaves that fly down Bearbones' gullet, eating them before they obstruct your vision. Amidst this strange storm, you hear a dull 'thud' as one Lizard starts hitting the back of your ride, possibly with a club.

    >COMMAND?
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:04 No.16748374
    >>16748352
    Murderficate that uncouth swine!
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:05 No.16748382
    rolled 17 = 17

    >>16748352
    just make the bear swing his paw against whatever is annoying your zombie's ass and proceed on eating
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:05 No.16748383
    rolled 6 = 6

    >>16748352
    Stick asshole out of asshole. Blow web in his face.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:05 No.16748386
    rolled 7 = 7

    >>16748352
    Oh they did NOT JUST SHOOT THEY GREEN SHIT AT ME!

    Retreat to the web economy apartment in Bear-tank's stomach and exit through the rib cage and spot for our minion. Find the legs of our attackers and direct the bear in the general direction
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:06 No.16748393
    rolled 10 = 10

    >>16748352
    Bail out the bottom of the bear, locate and throatlatch one of the lizards.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:06 No.16748404
    rolled 17 = 17

    >>16748352
    Grab elf corpse
    Whirlwind swing elf corpse
    profit by eating dead lizards and taking shiny thing
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:09 No.16748434
    rolled 17 = 17

    >>16748404
    This and shooting web at attackers
    >> OP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/26/11(Wed)22:15 No.16748502
    >>16748382
    >>16748404
    >>16748434
    You stop thrashing around, force Bearbones' head around to make it grab onto the mangled woodfolk's leg, and start blindly swinging the corpse around like it's nobody's business; you can't see a thing, and there are a few bumps as the corpse hits trees, but there's a strangled yelp as it comes into contact with SOMETHING-

    - and the storm of leaves seems to dissipate, leaving you staring at a Lizard that's desperately trying to get up. You turn around in your cocoon, open the bear's mouth, and proceed to fire web all over the Lizard, rooting it in place.

    ... the other Lizard is nowhere to be seen, so you start Bearbones nosing over towards the corpses; the metal band is clutched in the hands of the Lizard who was looting Bright-Plume, and you start eating him first.

    The webbed Lizard is watching in horror as the clearly dead bear skeleton grabs pieces of Lizard and starts shoving it down its bony maw.

    Once you finish eating, you're STILL not sated, and TIME STREAM does not kick up. Perhaps you need more food. In the meantime, you're stuck staring at a metal band with one yellow stone stuck in the middle.

    You also have a captive and one AWOL Lizard.

    >COMMAND?
    >> Nothingmancer 10/26/11(Wed)22:17 No.16748513
    rolled 14 = 14

    >>16748502
    Work on eating dem rocks and keep an eye on the captive.

    Attempt to entertain conversation.
    Or just blorp at him.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:18 No.16748523
    rolled 6 = 6

    >>16748513
    This.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:19 No.16748527
    rolled 4 = 4

    >>16748502
    Shove stone down the bears gullet, get a closer look before we consume it. Move towards the captive while we do so, there is some brain-nomming to be done afterwards.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:19 No.16748534
    rolled 1 = 1

    >>16748502
    Eat all available food, nom MAGIC LIZARD, fuck with stone to see what it can do.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:19 No.16748535
    rolled 5 = 5

    >>16748502
    try to talk to the lizard, if not possible eat him, the stone and anything that you didint ate previously
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:19 No.16748540
    >>16748513
    >Or just blorp at him.
    I imagine our blorp in sort of a bored, "how droll" tone. It's awesome.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:21 No.16748548
    rolled 9 = 9

    >>16748534
    Basically, this. Maybe magic lizard dude will evolve us? EAT ITS HEART
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:21 No.16748549
    rolled 7 = 7

    >>16748502
    Web the thing to the inside of our beartank. Blorp at the lizard and web it to the tree. Let's try to communicate through interpretive dance.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:22 No.16748560
    rolled 12 = 12

    >>16748549
    >interpretative dance
    why do i want this to win so much?
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:23 No.16748562
    rolled 13 = 13

    >>16748549
    Eat the stone, then communicate through interpretative dance.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:23 No.16748570
    Maybe we should keep the band for another elf chick?
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:23 No.16748572
    >>16748549
    >Let's try to communicate through interpretive dance.
    Our interpretive dance consists of pelvic thrusts alternated with lunging and gnawing motions.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:24 No.16748573
    rolled 19 = 19

    >>16748352
    Our minion will still fight for us if we're not in it, right? If so, we bail and crawl quickly out of the leaf storm, letting the lizardfolk fight the bear. We sneak up on the one with the rock thing (methinks it controls the leafstorm) and gain command of him.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:27 No.16748600
    rolled 18 = 18

    >>16748562
    Music for dance.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wb7MdnJFSxA
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:27 No.16748608
    rolled 6 = 6

    >>16748502
    Fucking GLEEP at him to show you mean business and then see if you can understand him. Leave the stone in the beartank for now.
    >> OP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/26/11(Wed)22:29 No.16748625
    >>16748513
    Safe in the ribcage of the bear, you immediately set to work on trying to eat the shinies; after a few seconds of futile nibbling on the metal, you use your mouth-hooks to pry out the yellow crystal and swallow it whole.

    You feel vaguely disappointed when no rush of power immediately envelops you. Your frog-mouth turns down in a frown as you concentrate. It's done SOMETHING, but you're not sure what.

    You turn to the Lizard and send the bear lumbering over, opening the bony jaws. Then you wriggle forward and peek out from between its teeth, eying your captive with regal solemnity.

    >BLORP.

    The Lizard jabbers away for a second, but the words only mean so much nonsense to you. Inside the bear's mouth, you wriggle and flail and headbob to some unheard beat as you attempt to hit on some common ancestral groove that will allow you to get whatever meaning it is across, but all you manage to do is to nearly impale yourself on bear-teeth.

    The Lizard stares for a second. It opens its mouth.

    --and then you feel something churning in your gut, and the yellow crystal's power resonates into and through your mind.

    "... what the FUCK?"

    >COMMAND?
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:31 No.16748646
    >>16748625
    "I find your lack of groove disturbing."
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:31 No.16748655
    >>16748625
    BLORP!
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:32 No.16748659
    rolled 11 = 11

    >>16748625
    make the bear point at captive with a claw, then make an imitational gesture over the bears neck with it. And say, Blorp
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:32 No.16748660
    rolled 16 = 16

    >>16748625
    Blorp AND Gleep

    Then get out of the bear and chill on the ground until your indigestion settles.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:33 No.16748664
    rolled 1 = 1

    >>16748625
    "BLORP!" (How rude!)

    ...Or was that us making the voice-noises?
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:33 No.16748668
    >>16748625

    Hiss at him in an offended tone. If we can form words, do so to the tune of this; "Isolent creature, I have no desire to mate with you!"
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:35 No.16748693
    rolled 3 = 3

    >>16748646
    I bet if we shape shift our vocal cords we could speak. Then we say this.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:35 No.16748694
    >>16748572
    Can't breathe
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:35 No.16748695
    rolled 16 = 16

    >>16748668

    Forgot me roll

    >Sir Tarkin
    I think Captcha wants to make him a knight in service to us. I'm okay with this.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:37 No.16748716
    >>16748646
    These threads are killing me
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:38 No.16748721
    rolled 4 = 4

    "Well shit dude, I didn't mean to scare you; I just wanted to join society and become a patron of the arts." In all seriousness, if the stone just made us talk (and say the fuck rather than understand him), then I'm secreting calmness and informing the lizards that I merely want to be friends, and that I want to meet the rest of their people. If I misinterpereted the scenario, then fucking ignore this post.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:38 No.16748723
         File1319683099.jpg-(248 KB, 2112x1558, blorp copy.jpg)
    248 KB
    rolled 3 = 3

    A bit slow, but have some blorp!

    It is not quite cute to Jesus Christ how horrifying as I would like, but you get what you pay for.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:38 No.16748728
    rolled 20 = 20

    >>16748625
    Wait, was it the Lizard saying "what the fuck?" Does this mean we can understand speech now? Either way, I say we ride out the power surge and see what it's done to us. The fucker's tied up anyway, right?
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:41 No.16748759
    >>16748723
    You forgot our Googly eyes.
    >> OP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/26/11(Wed)22:41 No.16748760
    >>16748646
    >>16748664
    Sadly, you still lack vocal chords. You will have to make do with 'blorp,' 'gleep,' and the occasional 'hurp.'

    >>16748668
    >>16748660
    ... you DO manage to hiss. However, it sounds like

    >Bloreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep.

    It doesn't seem like your meaning went across, though. The Lizard continues staring at you as you wriggle out of the bear's skeleton and chill on the ground. Your stomach IS feeling much better now, but you still have this strange ringing sound resonating through your body.

    Judging by the lack of comprehension on the Lizard's face, the crystal's power may be personal to you and only you.

    "No! Really! What the fuck! Chief's pet ain't supposed to be some magicker! Not supposed to be a killer! This... what the fuck!!"

    ... the Lizard, tied down to the floor and surrounded by the bloody remains of his fellows, seems to be suffering some kind of panic attack.

    >COMMAND?
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:42 No.16748775
    >>16748723
    Awesome.
    >> OP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/26/11(Wed)22:43 No.16748777
         File1319683382.jpg-(99 KB, 490x327, 1319493319956.jpg)
    99 KB
    >>16748723
    oh my fucking god i will have nightmares tonight

    glorious, glorious nightmares
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:44 No.16748786
    rolled 2 = 2

    >>16748760
    Lay our tong on his face. Let him be calmed by our saliva.

    Also, use calm aura.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:45 No.16748797
    rolled 2 = 2

    >>16748760
    Nuzzle him affectionately.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:45 No.16748803
    rolled 3 = 3

    >>16748760
    Calm that guy down. Have the bear distract him while we pop around back, and attach to his neck.

    We want information, dammit, and the odds are against this guy just giving us it.

    After we get the info though, don't kill him, but rather try and impart into him that we cool brah, and carry him back to town.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:45 No.16748804
    rolled 8 = 8

    >>16748760
    Use our calming aura to pump him full of good vibes.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:45 No.16748807
    rolled 9 = 9

    >>16748760
    Well we can't be leaving a mess, guess we need to eat all of the corpses and force the living one to watch.

    As he becomes more and more panicked let him struggle free, and then when he runs for the hills chase his ass down and see where he goes
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:46 No.16748814
         File1319683610.png-(2 KB, 150x147, broshock.png)
    2 KB
    >>16748723
    Argh!
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:47 No.16748825
    rolled 8 = 8

    >>16748804
    >>16748807

    Eat corpses, use calming aura
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:48 No.16748828
    rolled 8 = 8

    Gleep at him and project peace and love radiation.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:48 No.16748830
    rolled 19 = 19

    >>16748786
    Yes, let's salivate profusely at the scared fucker. That should calm him down.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:48 No.16748834
    I request our blue salamander stats!
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:48 No.16748837
    rolled 4 = 4

    >>16748760
    he knows too much!
    kill him!
    also what
    >>16748646
    said
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:50 No.16748850
    rolled 8 = 8

    >>16748804
    Rolling for the general consensus
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:51 No.16748857
    >>16748830
    Nuzzle him. We should web him to the wall of our cave and keep him as a pet. He's so adorably terrified.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:52 No.16748870
         File1319683926.jpg-(51 KB, 200x263, 1319016937836.jpg)
    51 KB
    rolled 20 = 20

    Grab the scared lizard. Drag it back to our cave. Stick it to the wall. Lay eggs and wait for our babies to feast. We can lay eggs, right?
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:53 No.16748883
    rolled 19 = 19

    >>16748777

    Want to know something truly terrifying? This guy is probably jumping at crotch height level. Imagine walking around and having this screaming towards your junk as you are paralyzed by the calming BLORP.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:53 No.16748888
    rolled 20 = 20

    >>16748870
    guess not but we can interrogate his brain while sucking his spine fluids i guess?
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:54 No.16748896
    >>16748870
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P3ALwKeSEYs
    >> OP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/26/11(Wed)22:54 No.16748899
    >>16748830
    You waffle back and forth between continuing to scare him shitless or calm it down. After a moment, you figure that with the noise it's making, you could end up with some unwanted attention... and you seriously don't know what else is living here.

    You slowly approach the Lizard, ignoring its cries. "S-Stay the fuck back! Don't eat me! Please don't eat me! I'll do anythmmf!" ... and you lay your tongue upon its face, radiating calmness from every pore on your blue body to cut off its imminent panic attack.

    The Lizard relaxes under your expert care. "Mmmf..."

    >COMMAND?

    >>16748834
    CURRENT STATS
    POWERS:
    >Calming Aura, Level 1
    >Shapeshifting/Body Sculpting, Level 1
    >Shadow Travel, Level 0 (Dormant; Bear's Power)
    >Necromancy, Level 1
    BODY:
    Oversized Cave Salamander
    >Mouth Hooks
    >Brain Improved
    >Web Spinners
    >> OP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/26/11(Wed)22:55 No.16748913
    >>16748870
    >>16748888
    >two max high rolls as I post
    ALL MY WHY
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:56 No.16748916
    rolled 17 = 17

    >>16748899
    >>16748870
    This.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:56 No.16748923
    >>16748899
    Can we imitate it's exact facial features?

    Because I seriously want to fuck with that lizard now
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:56 No.16748924
    >>16748899
    Relax it even more. Pump it full of relaxation until it goes to sleep.

    Then grab it, take it to our lair, and wrap it in webs until we're hungry again.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:56 No.16748926
    rolled 3 = 3

    >>16748899
    I realy want to check this lizard's brain for the BLORB past
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:56 No.16748927
    rolled 20 = 20

    >>16748899
    I think we should upgrade shadow travel to regular status next time we evolve - and then we start upgrading our regular powers. If we hunt at night, once we get a bit of strength in, we could have an army of the undead. Especially if we invest in some sort of sense-link telepathy.

    Oh, also: Take it back to the cave and web it to the wall. Then go hunting for the encampment.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:57 No.16748930
    rolled 17 = 17

    >>16748899
    Remove tounge, Gleep twice, stare for a few seconds and grace him with a rare Hurp.

    Then listen to what he has to say.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:57 No.16748934
    rolled 8 = 8

    Fuck dat lizard with all of our calming aura
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)22:58 No.16748943
    >>16748899
    >Expert care
    Fucking lost it
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:00 No.16748970
    >Hilarious, original, imaginative thread
    >/tg/

    Aw yeah, that's two this week!
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:00 No.16748972
    rolled 16 = 16

    Is blorp a boy or a girl? Either way, sex up the lizard then find the lizard town
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:00 No.16748973
    rolled 8 = 8

    >>16748954
    nope the second one was mine
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:01 No.16748984
    rolled 14 = 14

    >>16748973
    Yeah, realized that after I posted though. My bad.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:02 No.16748996
    rolled 9 = 9

    >>16748899
    Can we use the bones of the lizards to improve Bearbones? Like, structural reinforcement?
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:04 No.16749017
    how many meat we ate so far? because this bear had flesh before we zombified him
    im guessing more than half a ton?
    >> OP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/26/11(Wed)23:05 No.16749023
    >>16748927
    >>16748870
    >>16748888
    Now that he's putty underneath your tongue (and your muffling mindfuck powers), you web him up a little more, get into the bear, and drag the whole kit and kaboodle back to your little starting cave, where you proceed to web him AGAIN to the wall.

    Before you decide to go for the encampment, you reach over, under his stupidly smiling face, and proceed to bite him in the neck and interrogate him.

    >BLORP.

    "Okay, yeah, what's up?"

    You pause. He seems a little TOO relaxed.

    >... BLORP?

    "Pfffwha, I never liked those assholes anyway. Fucking assholes. I'm even a goddamn Leafdancer!"

    >BLOR-

    "And all the thanks I get? The last warrior up and running away! Fuckers, I knew they were-"

    >BLORP!

    "Oh. Oh yeah. Whaddaya want to know?"

    Hm.

    >COMMAND?
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:05 No.16749030
         File1319684736.jpg-(27 KB, 264x351, 1286094251376.jpg)
    27 KB
    >>16748888
    >>16748888
    >>16748888
    >>16748888
    >>16748888
    >>16748888
    >>16748888
    >>16748888
    >>16748888

    This should be the next action. Fucking quads and a max roll? Must be fate.
    >> Nothingmancer 10/26/11(Wed)23:06 No.16749042
    rolled 17 = 17

    >>16749023
    1.) The fucks a leafdancer
    2.) Why was your leader so fabulous
    3.) Blorp
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:07 No.16749050
    >>16749023
    Whats this pet thing about?
    Who was that elf?
    What was up with that stone?
    It was interpretative dance, Fuckass.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:07 No.16749057
    rolled 3 = 3

    >>16749023
    Have him sing us the song of his people and tell us about his culture, also explain what he knows of woodfolk.

    Compliment his leafdancing skill.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:08 No.16749066
    rolled 9 = 9

    >>16749023
    We want your powers, and to know where your village is!!

    This is turning out to be one ninja of a BLORP
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:08 No.16749070
    rolled 9 = 9

    >>16749050
    Roll
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:08 No.16749075
    rolled 10 = 10

    >>16749050
    >>16749042

    These two
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:09 No.16749084
    rolled 20 = 20

    >>16749023
    shit! forgot about the cmunication thing...can we search his mind? like memories, specially about earlier encounters with THE BLORB
    if thats not possible proceed to eat him....keeping as a pet is a liability too great for us to bear
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:09 No.16749092
    rolled 10 = 10

    >>16749084
    HA HA BEAR PUNS
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:10 No.16749099
    rolled 1 = 1

    >>16749084
    No, this guy seems cool. I like him. I say we keep him on as our minion.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:11 No.16749114
    rolled 16 = 16

    >>16749084
    here
    >>16749099
    YOU GOT NOPE'D
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:12 No.16749123
    rolled 10 = 10

    >>16749099
    It is official, dice gods hate lizardmen.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:12 No.16749131
    rolled 17 = 17

    >>16749099

    Yeah we need to have servants to help us out n shit
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:13 No.16749144
    rolled 14 = 14

    Ask the lizard bout his culture. Then sex him up
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:15 No.16749171
    AT FIRST I WAS
    >Gleep
    BUT THEN, I BLORPED.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:15 No.16749177
    rolled 7 = 7

    >>16749131
    It's not like we have thumbs. we need someone to carry shit.
    >> OP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/26/11(Wed)23:16 No.16749193
    >>16749042
    >BLORP? BLORP? BLORP.

    "A Leafdancer? I'M a Leafdancer! Make leaves dance. Rare."

    He pauses. "Nah, nah, our 'leader'? Fabulous? The fuck you talking about? You gotta see our CHIEFTAIN! He's got plumes up to here." He struggles to try and indicate height with a hand, but gives up because of the webs. "The 'fabulous leader' you ate was just our chieftain's son."

    The Leafdancer pauses, paling suddenly. "Oh. Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck. You ate Chieftain's son!! Chieftain's not gonna be too happy about that! He's gonna kill us all! He's gonna kill you, gonna kill me, gonna kill-"

    It takes you about half a minute of tongue ministrations and calming powers to get the Leafdancer back under control.

    >BLORP.

    "... WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT MEAN!?"

    >>16749084
    You try and probe his mind regarding memories. You... you see bits and flashes-

    - Other Leafdancers standing around the entrance to your cave, chanting-
    - One or two Lizards throwing dead animals into the cave before walking back out-
    - A Lizard that stands heads and shoulders above the othHOLY SHIT HIS BLOOD-RED PLUMES ARE SO LONG THAT THEY TRAIL DOWN HIS BACK-

    You pause and shake your head, feeling an impending headache. You can probe his memories a bit, you're just... not very good at it yet.

    >COMMAND?
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:19 No.16749213
    rolled 11 = 11

    >>16749193
    What about the Elf and the Stones. Tell us about those, new friend.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:21 No.16749245
    rolled 3 = 3

    >>16749213

    This. Ask him where his village is, and then give him a hurp. And sprout vocal cords.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:23 No.16749278
    rolled 7 = 7

    >>16749193
    Oh, let's keep him.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:24 No.16749281
    rolled 10 = 10

    >>16749193
    THE BLORP is not satisfied with your answers lizard!
    where is this camp and how many are you?
    also, whats with the woodfolk do you know him?
    and what about his necklace?
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:27 No.16749326
    rolled 6 = 6

    >>16749193
    We seriously need to evolve some goddamn telepathy
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:27 No.16749327
    rolled 4 = 4

    >>16749193
    Hurp at him graciously and learn about woodfolk.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:30 No.16749360
    rolled 3 = 3

    shitty rolls everywhere
    re- attempting >>16749281
    >> OP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/26/11(Wed)23:33 No.16749384
    >>16749213
    >BLORP.

    "The... the woodfolk?"

    Leafdancer shudders. "Bad news. Bad news. Dunno how woodfolk got into your cave. You stay away from them, okay? They got better swag, better tools, and they- and they- they're VICIOUS. You do better to stay with us sunfangs."

    Looks like the Lizards are called 'sunfangs.' You keep that in mind.

    He tilts his head. "And 'stones'... oh. Shinies? Don't know much about shinies. Oldest leafdancers always talking about them. Going on about 'earth' and 'fate of sunfangs.' I'm just.. just normal leafdancer. No one tell me anything."

    He sulks a little bit. And then he droops a little more. You HAVE been drinking his blood for a while, and he's starting to look a little bit weak.

    >COMMAND?
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:35 No.16749398
    rolled 17 = 17

    >>16749384
    FINISH HIM!
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:37 No.16749420
    rolled 4 = 4

    Unlatch, Hurp, and leave him. Not sure how to free him from the webs but presumably they biodegrade or something. I guess the beartank could cut him loose.

    Let him go back to his people to prevent them from coming at you in force after whatever heinous lies the warrior who got away tells them about your alleged bloodthirstiness.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:37 No.16749423
    rolled 7 = 7

    >>16749384
    too bad for him...time to get the location from the village from him and possible security forces
    then we eat him and go on on a scout mission on the sunfang village
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:37 No.16749429
    rolled 3 = 3

    >>16749384

    Torture him. Command the bear-skeleton to tear off his skin.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:38 No.16749434
    >>16749384
    Okay, tell him to take you back to the village. I don't think any of the warriors actually saw you, just the bear. Tell him to say that you came along and saved him from the evil undead bear. Enplane the wounds in his neck as being from that fight.

    Blame the woodfolk for the death of the chief's son. Leave the bear in the cave.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:38 No.16749442
    rolled 9 = 9

    Do this:
    >>16749420
    Not this:
    >>16749398

    We will be a peaceful and reasonable bloodthisty blorpmonster and that is final.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:38 No.16749443
    rolled 8 = 8

    >>16749384
    He's been a bro so far, I think we should try to convince him to tell his leader that it was the woodfolk that killed the chieftains son. After all, the more secure a food source is, the better.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:39 No.16749448
    rolled 9 = 9

    >>16749434
    roll
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:39 No.16749450
    rolled 20 = 20

    Leave him, and go search for the sunfang village
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:39 No.16749461
    rolled 5 = 5

    >>16749420
    >Alleged bloodthirstiness
    Nigga we lust for their flesh
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:40 No.16749464
    rolled 10 = 10

    MORE METABOTS, MORE POWER

    make the leaf-ballerina lead sunfags to the cave!
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:40 No.16749466
    rolled 14 = 14

    >>16749420
    Reroll goddamn don't kill our lizard druid pal. At least let him recover so we have a reliable blood source.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:40 No.16749473
    >>16749450

    fuuuuuuuck, the gods are looking out for Mr. Lizard.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:41 No.16749477
    >>16749450

    Cut him loose and let him take us back to the Sunfang village you mean. After we lovingly lick him on the face and declare that he is a "Gloop" and a "hurf"
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:41 No.16749481
    rolled 7 = 7

    >>16749450
    thank you
    can we let this lizard go if it is too weak?
    no point in killing this helpful being
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:43 No.16749496
    rolled 9 = 9

    >>16749477

    Ok, but we need to sprout some vocal cords
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:46 No.16749535
    rolled 18 = 18

    >>16749496
    or telepathic communication?
    in a nutshellbe able to communicate with something someway that is not only brain probing
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:46 No.16749544
    rolled 19 = 19

    >>16749496
    This
    >> OP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/26/11(Wed)23:51 No.16749593
    >>16749450
    >>16749477
    You detach yourself from the sunfang's neck and frown a little froggy frown to yourself. You're hungry- you're ALWAYS hungry, now- but you decide to leave this guy be. He gave you some information, and that counts for something! Probably.

    You cut the leafdancer out of the webs, but not before giving him a gigantic lick and an enthusiastic

    >GLEEP.

    "... seriously, what does that mean?"

    >HURP.

    "T-That's not an answer, but... whatever, man."

    The leafdancer scurries back towards his village, clearly trying to think up a suitable excuse to give to the chieftain. Meanwhile... you pilot the bear skeleton over to where you think the little flickering lights were; the sun is starting to set, so it's not TOO hard to find those lights in the darkening forest, even though you lose sight of the little sunfang.

    ... when you draw close enough, you realize that the lights... the lights are fucking flickering or- or DANCING. Like they're alive. You see sunfangs throwing sticks and bits of wood into the flickering lights...

    And each and every other sunfang you can see is facing outward from the flames, wielding their trademark clubs. They're ready for a goddamn brawl. You don't see your leafdancer, but at least the sunfangs don't see you... yet.

    >COMMAND?
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:52 No.16749607
    rolled 11 = 11

    >>16749593
    Okay this is getting lame as hell. Lets slap his shit.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:52 No.16749608
    rolled 4 = 4

    >>16749593
    Kick their anuses! And eat them all.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:54 No.16749624
    rolled 18 = 18

    >>16749593
    We wait, if they are prepared to defend from something then why would we throw ourselves at it? Better to find out what they are guarding against, then murder it because it won't be expecting it.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:54 No.16749625
    rolled 5 = 5

    >>16749593
    Appear imposing as fuck in your bear tank and issue a menacing BLORP.

    Also calming aura so they dont just bumrush you
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:55 No.16749639
         File1319687741.jpg-(348 KB, 2484x2000, Blorp2 copy.jpg)
    348 KB
    rolled 10 = 10

    >>16749593

    Gentlemen, I present to you our ride. Onward to glory.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:55 No.16749640
    rolled 10 = 10

    >>16749593
    time to NOT FIGHT, no one wants to the DM be forced to kill us, right guys?
    a stealth approach is necessary, maybe parking the bear somewhere and going around the village as a inconspicuous BLORB might gives enough info on how to strike this village
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:56 No.16749646
    >>16749624
    I was refering to the sunfangs guard for the first it.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:57 No.16749663
    GENTLEMEN

    An Experiment if you will, what if we say, web'd OTHER bones to our Skeleton fortress? Could we then made our bear-slave able to use those limbs? So eventually we could cover our entire thing in moving plates of bone?
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:58 No.16749687
    rolled 8 = 8

    >>16749593
    What if we fuck with them a little bit? Barrel through them in Bearbones then just fucking *disappear*. Then hit them from somewhere else or start picking them off one by one.
    >> Anonymous 10/26/11(Wed)23:59 No.16749694
    rolled 15 = 15

    >>16749663
    like all the lizardman and woodfolk bones?
    mite b cool
    if possible....
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:00 No.16749705
    >>16749663
    Eventually that would barrel into making a moving graveyard, with use at its core, like a moving beaver-dam of bones that hates people. I support this, but I doubt it will work unless we get higher necromancy skills.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:04 No.16749751
    rolled 4 = 4

    Guys.. Why not shapeshift into a lizard, and see what is going on?
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:06 No.16749761
    >>16749751

    ....Because we ARE a Lizard? We are a large, fat, blue, cave skink....with horrible parts ala'

    >>16748723
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:06 No.16749765
    rolled 5 = 5

    >>16749751
    second, but only if we get to communicate
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:06 No.16749766
    >>16749751
    I shall second this.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:07 No.16749768
    rolled 8 = 8

    >>16749751
    Oh yeah, we can do that. Lets do that.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:07 No.16749774
    rolled 12 = 12

    >>16749766
    Forgot to support roll.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:08 No.16749782
    rolled 12 = 12

    >>16749751
    What he said but hopefully with a higher roll.

    Become the leafdancer. See what is up. Leave the beartank in reserve just in case.

    Seriously we need to start speccing shapeshifting and become The Thing mixed with Alien.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:08 No.16749784
    rolled 4 = 4

    >>16749751
    Agreed.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:09 No.16749796
    rolled 14 = 14

    >>16749751
    supporting this, but do not walk in areas of high traffic, since the shapeshift is TEMPORARY and we never really used it
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:09 No.16749799
    rolled 14 = 14

    >>16749751
    Winner by popular vote, if not dice.
    >> OP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/27/11(Thu)00:10 No.16749806
    >>16749639
    fffffff holy shit, you are my hero now and forever

    I was not expecting to be writing about a bear skeleton as a car, nor was I expecting a PICTURE of that. THANK YOU

    >>16749694
    >>16749705
    Yeah, you're going to need higher necromantic skills to start taking apart foreign skeletons and adding them onto a bear skeleton that wasn't meant to have THAT many bones.

    >>16749624
    You make your bear skeleton hunker down as much as physically possible, using a tree and a bush for cover, and decide to wait and see what happens...

    The sun eventually disappears over the horizon. You still do not see the Chief of the sunfangs, nor do you see your own leafdancer.

    You DO, however, start to hear the sound of the wind moving through the trees... but without the wind. You squint your little eyes and, through your bear's bones, begin to see dark shapes moving swiftly- you immediately lose count, partly because there are so many and partly because you don't know what numbers actually are.

    ... the woodfolk. No doubt about it, they're the woodfolk.

    None of them see you, even as they move past, around, and sometimes over you. Apparently, they see the BEAR skeleton, but not you. All of the woodfolk, carrying spears and more spears, eventually settle into position, watching the sunfangs. And waiting.

    There are, in fact, three sitting around you; one to your left, one to your right, and one squatting on top of your goddamn skeleton.

    And the one on your left is giving you a funny look.

    >COMMAND?
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:14 No.16749842
    rolled 17 = 17

    >>16749806
    time to be SUSPICIOUS AS FUCK!
    make the bear feign dead
    watch the bloodshed and proceed to eat the dead
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:14 No.16749844
    rolled 17 = 17

    >>16749806
    Wait until they are all in front of you, then rape/eat them.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:15 No.16749866
    rolled 10 = 10

    >>16749806
    Give an enthusiastic GLEEP as warning and knock a woodfolk toward the Sunfangs. Then climb a tree. Quickly. Watch the ensuing carnage and eat a survivor whenever safe.

    If we evolve, get Shadowjumping - we couldp robably spin webs thick enough to make a shadow in the bear's rib cage and it'll be easier to catch prey.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:15 No.16749868
    rolled 8 = 8

    >>16749806

    Enact the calm aura, and continue to wait until they decide to strike the lizards. Nothing to suspect from a simple skeleton, it happens all the time. And what better place to build a web than in the rib-cage of the dead, it's likely got a bunch of bugs swarming in or around it from the nutrients that it has left in the ground. NOTHING SUSPICIOUS HERE.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:16 No.16749872
    rolled 16 = 16

    >>16749806

    We should attack while the surprise is ours. Just kill a few then flee some distance.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:16 No.16749880
    rolled 19 = 19

    >>16749806
    Good things happened the last time you OM NOMed one of these guys. I say eat them all and gain more power.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:18 No.16749899
    rolled 11 = 11

    Gleep and calm at him. Once they turn away, latch his neck and have the bear attack. Lead your sunfriends to glorious victory and become their chubby amphibious God King.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:19 No.16749907
    rolled 10 = 10

    >>16749806
    Slip out of the skeleton as inconspicuously as possible, then when we're a reasonable distance away have it flip the FUCK out and start mauling elves. Possibly using the one sitting on top of it as a club.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:20 No.16749922
    rolled 7 = 7

    >>16749907
    This.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:22 No.16749936
    rolled 5 = 5

    >>16749907
    This but with more gleeping.

    Maybe just gleep more in general. It is one of our core skills and we are underutilizing it pretty bad.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:24 No.16749966
    rolled 53, 33, 41, 68, 16, 15, 18, 54, 93, 42 = 433

    Rolling 10d100 for one shot Vast Gleep that explodes the brains and eyes of all creatures in one mile radius.

    Success on 9990+ or quads.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:25 No.16749981
    rolled 31, 96, 17, 37, 33, 8, 34, 44, 16, 63, 48, 30, 76, 86, 71, 11, 35, 25, 6, 23, 26, 45, 24, 35, 82 = 1002

    >>16749966
    Meant 100d100 oops
    >> OP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/27/11(Thu)00:26 No.16750000
    >>16749842
    >>16749844
    You try to make your bear skeleton look more dead than it already is. More importantly, you lay low and try not to breathe TOO loudly.

    You are one with the forest. You are stealth. You are nothing to see here. You-


    >>16749880
    - snap in about eight seconds because you're surrounded by creatures that look like the first thing you ever killed and ate on your own.

    You give it your best BLORP and make your bear skeleton rear up; the woodfolk on top of you shrieks as it falls off, while the two on either side scramble back as fast as they can. You do NOT give the one that was looking at you time to recover; in seconds, it's speared against one of the trees by bear claws, and skeletal jaws crush its neck before it can do anything but scream.

    You do not have time to finish your meal, though, as the remaining two woodfolk start jabbing at the skeletons with their spears, yelling bloody murder about

    >the crystal resonates again

    - monsters and night horrors. The first spear rattles uselessly against the bear's back, but the other actually pierces the web cocoon and nicks the top of your head; you flatten against the bottom of the ribcage. Too damn close.

    You hear woodfolk in the distance coming closer, and the sunfangs are starting to take notice; with a yell, the lizards start charging. In a few moments, there will be nothing but chaos.

    >COMMAND?
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:28 No.16750025
    rolled 17 = 17

    >>16750000
    Grab one of them and make a run for it. We can probe and eat him back at the Blorp Cave.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:29 No.16750027
         File1319689748.jpg-(48 KB, 293x208, 1279165661008.jpg)
    48 KB
    rolled 17 = 17

    >>16750000

    Beat the fuck out of them.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:29 No.16750028
    rolled 62, 40, 76, 47, 27, 87, 20, 92, 97, 4, 82, 11, 9, 84, 8, 37, 90, 86, 76, 69, 79, 50, 45, 62, 8 = 1348

    >>16750000
    Bail out and hide in the underbrush. Try to slip closer to the fire and get the sunfangs between you and the woodfolk. Have the bear keep ripping and tearing the woodfolk and NOT the sunfangs.

    Current objective: Become savior of lizardman tribe. Eventually challenge chief after using evo powers to grow even more fabulous head plumes.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:29 No.16750036
    rolled 4 = 4

    >>16750028
    How i rolled diec??
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:29 No.16750037
    rolled 20 = 20

    >>16750000
    That elf who nicked your head? Pick him up and use him to beat his friend to death.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:30 No.16750041
    rolled 5 = 5

    >>16750000
    Slay one or two more, then clamber up a tree. Best to stay out of the chaos, then reap all the rewardingly delicious bodies as our reward.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:30 No.16750046
    rolled 3 = 3

    >>16750037
    YES
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:33 No.16750071
    >>16750037

    I wish to lay my 6 billion eggs inside your frontal lobe in an expression of love and gratitude.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:33 No.16750073
    rolled 10 = 10

    >>16750000
    Up the tree! Up the tree! Quick smart! As soon as something gets separated from the battle, scale down (or jump like a spider with web bungee cables) and eat that motherfucker.

    Bear should continue to flip out until battle is joined, and then slump. Have it try to sneak away once it is being ignored.
    >> OP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/27/11(Thu)00:39 No.16750128
    >>16750037
    You feel the top of your head. You narrow your squinty eyes. The edge of your lip curls, revealing a bit of one mouth-hook.

    In a flash, your bear reaches over, grabs the offending woodfolk BY THE FACE, and rears up on its hindlegs, before bringing the spindly humanoid down towards its friend.

    The woodfolk dodges once; there's the sound of snapping bones as your makeshift weapon hits the ground, along with a choked scream. He dodges twice; more snaps and gurgles from your weapon.

    Third time's the charm, and you play with your food so hard that both woodfolk are mashed down in a small explosion of gore. The bear skeleton is left holding onto a head, which you immediately spike into the ground as if you've made a touchdown.

    You look up and realize that a small circle of woodfolk is surrounding you. All of them have spears. Most of them look vaguely ill, and a few are throwing up. None look very willing to challenge you.

    ... and half of the circle then disintegrates as howling lizardmen lay into them with clubs.

    You are now surrounded by a sea of carnage as woodfolk kill sunfangs, sunfangs kill woodfolk, and woodfolk try their damned hardest to get AROUND you so as to attack the sunfang.

    >COMMAND?
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:40 No.16750143
    rolled 11 = 11

    >>16750128

    Beat. The. Ever. Loving. Shit. Out of dem Elves. But don't harm the Sunfang, unless they hit you, then you just toss them away.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:43 No.16750169
    rolled 17 = 17

    >>16750128
    Ain't nothing getting around this mad beast. KILL THE LIFE OUT OF THEM!
    ...Using the bear skeleton. We should evacuate and get up a tree real quick-like, being stabbed by spears seems like a disadvantage.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:45 No.16750188
    rolled 7 = 7

    >>16750128
    Show those elves that there's no easing around a pissed off bear. Not even a dead one. Fuck their shit up.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:46 No.16750197
    rolled 15 = 15

    >>16750128
    BLORP LIKE YOU HAVE NEVER BLORPED BEFORE, FOR FROM WITHIN YOUR MIGHTY STEED YOU ARE AN ENGINE OF MIGHTY DESTRUCTION. ALL WILL STAND IN AWE OF YOUR MAJESTY.

    Throw in some aura beams for effect and then treat them all to a spirited interpretive dance.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:50 No.16750226
    rolled 20 = 20

    >>16750128
    Kill all the elves. Become Lizard man Deity.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:52 No.16750249
    >>16750226
    >Nat 20
    FUCK YES SON
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:53 No.16750259
         File1319691215.png-(24 KB, 558x373, 1308012290055.png)
    24 KB
    >>16750226

    >Our eventual face when we look back at this moment and remember the carnage.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:54 No.16750264
    rolled 3 = 3

    >>16750226
    IT BEGINS
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:54 No.16750270
         File1319691296.jpg-(13 KB, 295x324, 1300059939545.jpg)
    13 KB
    rolled 17 = 17

    >>16750226

    Let the epicness begin.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:55 No.16750279
    rolled 17 = 17

    >>16750264
    >>16750270

    Hivemind.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:56 No.16750286
         File1319691394.jpg-(54 KB, 171x297, 1303015104238.jpg)
    54 KB
    rolled 17 = 17

    >>16750226

    This is the best quest thread I've seen in a long time.
    >> OP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/27/11(Thu)00:57 No.16750294
    >>16750169
    >>16750226
    You back the bear up against a tree, and you... you've never climbed a tree before in your life- hell, you've never SEEN one until today- but you manage to situate yourself where a branch meets the trunk.

    And just in the nick of time, too, as an enterprising woodfolk stabs straight though the web cocoon. In response? Your bear SLAMS THE SHIT OUT OF THE TREEHUGGING BASTARD. And that's just the start of it.

    The battle doesn't last much longer; the woodfolk are dividing their attention between the sunfangs and YOUR BEAR standing in the middle of the melee, crushing, mauling, and hurling woodfolk left and right. The occasional sunfang that tries to bash the bear is also tossed aside, but in a less destructive manner.

    ... and then, in a flash of red plumes, the chieftain of the sunfangs enters the fray. Easily the size of the woodfolk, this massive lizard erupts out of goddamn nowhere and starts laying about him with a giant bone for a club. And-

    Less than thirty seconds later, the remaining woodfolk flee into the trees, leaving behind an awful lot of food. The sunfang give chase, howling with victory...

    ... except for the Chieftain, who stomps a prone woodfolk to death before looking up at your bear skeleton. Not at YOU, who's sitting in a tree.

    "... so you're the one that little shrimp was talking about. I've been hearing a lot about you." The Chieftain's voice. It's...

    ... it's filled with awe and respect.

    >COMMAND?
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:58 No.16750309
    rolled 9 = 9

    >>16750294

    BLORP with all the majesty your flabby little body can muster.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:59 No.16750312
    rolled 12 = 12

    >>16750294

    Wriggle out and BLORP at him then give him a reassuring lick before DEVOURING THE DEAD.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:59 No.16750315
    rolled 13 = 13

    >>16750294
    Kill him, remove feathers and put on skeleton head, with webs as support, WE CHIEF NOW!
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)00:59 No.16750323
    rolled 18 = 18

    >>16750294
    Let him know who we are - Blorp, gleep and HURP as we cuddle into our bear skeleton.

    We'll sleep in his tent tonight. And eat him.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)01:00 No.16750326
    rolled 13 = 13

    >>16750294
    >BLOOOOOOOORP
    get back in the bear and attempt interpretative dance
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)01:00 No.16750332
    rolled 18 = 18

    >>16750294
    Preach your first Sermon.

    "Blorp!"
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)01:00 No.16750333
    rolled 16 = 16

    >>16750294

    Take my rightful place as king of the sunfangs and let them awe at our dark majesty.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)01:01 No.16750338
    rolled 17 = 17

    >>16750312
    YOU HAVE MY TWENTY!
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)01:01 No.16750344
    rolled 5 = 5

    >>16750323

    No won't eat him, we'll "feed" off him yes, but if we can nurture good relations with the Sunfang then we may start a cycle of our children being raised and worshipped by them, then the Sunfang will bring the dead and dying enemies and their own people to our altar and feed us.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)01:02 No.16750357
    rolled 9 = 9

    >>16750315
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)01:04 No.16750374
    rolled 16 = 16

    Blorp at him and begin to feast on the dead. Hit him with the aura to be sure he likes you.

    At next evolution get some damn vocal cords.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)01:05 No.16750385
    rolled 3 = 3

    >>16750326
    DANCE, BEAR, DANCE
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)01:05 No.16750394
    rolled 2 = 2

    So the consensus is, Blorp at him, Make him love us, Feast on the dead while he gently scratches our head?
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)01:08 No.16750416
    rolled 7 = 7

    >>16750394
    And interpretative dance.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)01:08 No.16750418
    rolled 20 = 20

    >>16750394
    Also, kill in sleep and take feathers.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)01:09 No.16750421
    rolled 3 = 3

    >>16750312

    This.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)01:09 No.16750428
    rolled 18 = 18

    >>16750418
    >>16750418
    >>16750418
    >>16750418
    >> Inquisitorial Librarian 10/27/11(Thu)01:09 No.16750429
    rolled 9 = 9

    >>16750294
    Okay, quick thinking time. GET BACK IN THE BEAR!

    Chief is looking at the Bear. Not us. The Bear.

    Follow my chain of thought. He thinks the bear did it. We're just a lizard to him, as far as the Chief knows.

    But if we sneak back into our bear and come out... Then he has a better chance of realizing that it was us controling the bear.

    Que Techlotamortei, God Lizard of the Dead.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)01:10 No.16750434
    >>16750418

    You motherfucker. Way to sabotage long term plans of having a servant race to bring food to us. We WERE the Chief's pet before we evolved.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)01:10 No.16750439
    rolled 2 = 2

    No no no, eat the dead but leave the chief alive. We're going to need him for our future conquests
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)01:12 No.16750446
    rolled 10 = 10

    Eat everything except leafdancer
    >> OP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/27/11(Thu)01:18 No.16750502
    >>16750332
    >>16750323
    The Chieftain frowns when the bear skeleton doesn't answer him. He's about to speak, when the bear shambles off towards a nearby tree; mystified, the large sunfang follows, and watches as the bear skeleton reaches one claw up to a branch.

    And then he sees it. He sees...

    >BLORP.

    ... you, as you are reverently lifted down and re-situated back into the bear's ribcage. You stare at him with all the solemnity you can muster.

    The Chieftain stares. And then a gigantic grin splits his scarred, scaled face, revealing sharp teeth. "So... that old leafdancer was right! I knew it! I fucking knew it! They called you my 'pet,' but we all knew better, huh? Damn straight!"

    The Chieftain sobers beneath your gaze, and he brings a fist to his chest in salute. "I heard from that shrimp about the woodfolk; how the fuckers lured you all out of the cave to murder my son, and bring his body back to their damned lair. As expected of the Guardian reborn!"

    Behind the Chieftain, you see your leafdancer waving shyly. You have no clue what anyone's talking about anymore, so you manage to keep down a burp and look interested.

    "But... you've got bigger things on your mind! I know that. So."

    The Chieftain bends at the knee just as the rest of the sunfang trickle back into the clearing, some of them dragging woodfolk corpses by the leg.

    "Guardian of the Earth. The sunfang are yours. What will you have us do?"

    (continued; too long)
    >> OP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/27/11(Thu)01:19 No.16750513
    (continued from) >>16750502
    You ponder this for a moment, looking down your nose at the surrounding sunfang from your bear-perch; most of them have bent down at the knee as well. Some are prostrate against the ground. And one or two of them remain standing, looking at you with unreadable expressions.

    Regardless, you force your bear skeleton to point a sharp claw at the nearest dead woodfolk.

    >BLORP. GLEEP. HURP.

    .... the Chieftain laughs mightily before, with a toss of his plumes, he offers up the mangled spindly humanoid's body for your eating pleasure.

    Honestly? It tastes even better than that woodfolk you ate in the very beginning.

    >THREAD END; TO BE CONTINUED.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)01:21 No.16750537
    rolled 6 = 6

    >>16750513

    You are a god among men OP
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)01:22 No.16750539
    we need to archive this thread

    also...did we archived the last one?
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)01:22 No.16750543
    >>16750513
    We are now a Derpy Lizard cult leader. I love this.
    >> OP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/27/11(Thu)01:22 No.16750545
    >>16750502
    >>16750513
    And that's a wrap for tonight because I'm getting lightheaded from NINE HOURS OF QUEST and I have to get up in about six hours.

    Holy shit.

    Thanks for following this quest! I seriously didn't think it would get this far, and your guys' contributions were goddamn amazing.

    I'll be continuing this tomorrow, but at a later time; probably from about 7-8 pm EST (rather than 4 pm EST).

    If you guys have questions or comments, I'd love to hear them.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)01:22 No.16750546
    >>16750513
    Nice work OP. Looking forward to seeing more.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)01:23 No.16750557
    >>16750513
    This was wonderful. Any idea when you'll be continuing OP? I don't want to miss the next thread.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)01:25 No.16750584
    rolled 4 = 4

    >>16750374
    Given the number of suggestions coming in, 1d20 is maybe a low roll to use and we have been getting a lot of 20s. Maybe bump it up to a d50 or d100.

    Otherwise, you and the anon who suggested groove aura and mouth hooks are gentlemen and scholars of the highest order.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)01:26 No.16750596
    >>16750545
    Oh, that answers that.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)01:26 No.16750597
    >>16750545
    Is this one archived yet?
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)01:28 No.16750612
    >>16750545
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rm4dbjGAdM4&feature=channel_video_title
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)01:31 No.16750646
    >>16750597
    How do you archive?
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)01:32 No.16750661
    This quest has made my afternoon/evening/night.

    Good show, everyone.
    >> OP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/27/11(Thu)01:37 No.16750702
    >>16750584
    Yeah, I had no idea we'd get so many rolls that were either amazingly high or stupidly low; I'll switch to a d100 next time.

    >>16750597
    Done; just archived it.

    >>16750612
    ... why is this game's music so good
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)01:39 No.16750720
    >>16750584
    >>16750702
    I don't know about that, I rather like the 20-sider rolls.
    >> OP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/27/11(Thu)01:43 No.16750762
    >>16750720
    A d100 might be a little easier on me because of all the ties we were getting; on the other hand, they DID let me blend together answers more easily.

    ... hmm, I'll have to think about this.
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)01:46 No.16750779
    >>16750584
    I originally suggested it good anon but it was /tg/ and OP that made this thread DIAMONDS.
    >> OP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/27/11(Thu)01:58 No.16750871
    >>16750768
    Thanks! The sunfang feeding Blorp (should I just call it that now?) was literally the first thing that I had planned out. I'd had a vague idea about them seeing Blorp as being kind of scary.

    ALMOST EVERYTHING ELSE about the sunfang- what they looked like and what they were called- was made up off the top of my head as we went along, mostly because I didn't even know if we'd be sticking with them. They were the least planned-out creatures I had, because most of my planning assumed that we'd be away from them, actually.

    Also, I'd seriously suggest playing E.V.O.: Search for Eden if you haven't already. That game took EAT EVERYTHING AND EVOLVE and gave it a wonderfully ridiculous plot, so I'm seriously hoping that's what I can shoot for.

    Anyway, I'm going to crash and let this thread die off now. Hope to see most of you tomorrow!
    >> Anonymous 10/27/11(Thu)02:01 No.16750900
    rolled 5 = 5

    >>16750871

    God speed OP. Get some rest, tomorrow is going to be crazy.



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