>>5998869
>>Punch more holes in the wall (3 minutes)

>>5998869
>>Go make breakfast (30 minutes)

>>5998869
>you only have, from this moment on, five days to live.
How this will happen and why is very important context.

>Do something else (Time Depends)
Fuck it. If our character is dying, he might as well spend it someplace beautiful.

>Write goodbye letters for the people that still care to find after the five days.
>Take a trip to a national park and camp out.

>>5998869
>Go make breakfast (30 minutes)

Let's look up a recipe for pancakes online. It's not a cure for depression, but it's the best thing this side of lithium

>>5998869
>Punch more holes in the wall (3 minutes)

>>5998869
>Theorize that you can't die until five days have passed or your ability would be wrong. Put the gun to your head. Pull the trigger.

>>5998869
>>Go make breakfast (30 minutes)

Then:
>Write goodbye letters for the people that still care to find after the five days.
>Take a trip to a national park and camp out.

Make sure we bring food for that too, so we can have a nice picnic or something.

>>5998869
>Call someone (2-100 minutes)

>>5998877
>>5998888
Checked. Changing my own vote to this >>5998888.

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>>5998872
>>5998875
>>5998877
>>5998878
>>5998884
>>5998887
>>5998888
>>5998890
You punch a few more holes in the wall. It doesn't do much for you. Are you really gonna go out of the world with such a fucked up home? Holes everywhere, blankets on the floor... God, you really are a mess.
>-3 minutes
You then go into the kitchen. You try to look up a pancake recipe but realize you have none of the ingredients, so instead you make cereal. It takes you 30 minutes to do so because you can't figure out how to open the cereal box. You remember that you haven't eaten in 2 days, but also feel no desire to eat the food in front of you.
You ponder your situation. In 5 days, the world will end. All of it destroyed, including you. All your friends, gone. The country you live in, the planet's history, wiped away. You don't know how it will happen. Maybe the sun will explode? Maybe the Earth will? Either way, the Earth will be gone.
You look at your phone and think about calling someone. Who would you even call?

DAYS: 5
DAY TIMER: 23:27:00

>Call Ralph (Time Depends)
>Call Felino (Time Depends)
>Call Mom (Time Depends)
>Call Dad (Time Depends)
>Cry (2-60 minutes)
>Take the easy way out (End Quest)
>Force yourself to eat (20 minutes)
>Do something else (Time Depends)

>>5998912
>Force yourself to eat
Gonna need energy.

>>5998912
>>Force yourself to eat (20 minutes)
>Call Mom (Time Depends)

>>5998912
>>Force yourself to eat (20 minutes)

>>5998912
>Call Felino (Time Depends)

>>5998912
>Force yourself to eat (20 minutes)

>>5998912
>Write in
>Call whoever among Ralph, Felino, Mom, and Dad cares the most first (Time Depends)
>Force yourself to eat (20 minutes)
>Write goodbye letters for the people that still care to find after the five days.
>Take a trip to a national park and camp out.
If it's an End of the World scenario, we should try to bring someone along with us on the trip.

>>5998912
>to find after the five days.
The world's ending, anon. They'll all be dead, too.

>>5998912
>Force yourself to eat (20 minutes)
>Call a crisis line, maybe it's all fake, MAYBE PLEASE GOD IT'S ALL FAKE

>>5998869
Take care, QM. Depression's rough. I hope this is cathartic to you?

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>>5998916
>>5998923
>>5998926
>>5998928
>>5998930
>>5998932
>>5998941
You force yourself to eat it all. It doesn't taste like anything, and you feel no fuller.
>-20 minutes
You call your mother. She picks up.
You try to say hello, but she cuts you off.
"No money, go away, bye." and then she hangs up, just like that. Maybe you shouldn't have asked her for so much money...
>-1 minute
You call Felino next. She's one of the few women in your life. You've known her since high school. You like her a lot. She moved out of state after graduation. You haven't seen her in person since, but you've stayed in touch.
"Hey!" she says, cheerful, "What's up?"
What now?

DAYS: 5
DAY TIMER: 23:06:00

>Ask her how she's doing
>Talk about the weather
>Invite her over
>Talk about interests
>Tell her the world is going to end
>Take the easy way out and make her listen, her voice is the last one you want to hear (End Quest)
>Do something else (Time Depends)

>>5998941
(Oh, don't worry about me! I had this idea way before the depression break I had. It's an idea I've wanted to do for a while. I suppose it's cathartic in the way I've always wanted to write something sad, lol.
Worry not though, anons. It's not all gonna be doom and gloom, I promise you.)

>>5998953
>Ask her how she's doing
I hope she's going to have a good last few days...

>>5998953
>Ask her how she's doing
>Talk about interests
Verification not required, we're so back.

>>5998953
>Ask her how she's doing

>>5998953
>Ask her how she's doing
>Ask her if she's available for a few days
>Do the national park trip regardless if she decides to come or not
Sorry for sounding like a broken record, but the quest format seems like it allows a lot of things to change quickly.

>>5998957
Glad to hear things are going alright. I'm looking forward to what you have in store, but please remember to take care of yourself.

>>5998963
You tagged me by mistake, anon.

>>5998956
I share that anon's sentiment, though. You seem like a cool guy. I hope you're feeling better soon!

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>>5998957
>>5998959
>>5998960
>>5998963
You ask her how she's doing.
"Oh, good!" she says, "Me and Jon were gonna head out for dinner tonight, so that'll be fun."
Ugh, Jon. If there ever was a hipster then that hipster is Jon. He's Felino's "boyfriend" or whatever. He is always spewing some nonsense about some band or wailing over his fucking guitar. If there's anyone you want to see blown to smithereens by the end of the world it's fucking Jon, fuck that guy.
You tell her that you're happy she's having a good time, and bring up one of the interests you both often partake in, and that's video games.
"Oh! Yeah! Are you on for Zolfor's Fortress tonight?"
Zolfor's Fortress. A fantasy-themed first-person shooter you and Felino play together online. It's very "retro" if that's the word. It's fun enough.
It's there that you think of running off to some national park, away from it all, but perhaps you should save that for later.
>You're on
>You're not on
>Tell her to break up with Jon
>Badmouth Jon
>Praise Jon
>Do something else (Time Depends)

>>5998967
>You're on

>>5998967
>You're on

>>5998967
>You're on
>Suggest Jon should play, too
Bet he fuckin' won't. 'Cause he sucks. But maybe she'll start to realize he sucks if she sees how he doesn't want to play cool games, like us?

>>5998967
>You're on
Would love to at least jokingly tell her to break up with Jon if she lacks behind in the game, just to get it off the system lol

>>5998967
>You're on

>>5998964
Shit. I hope the QM caught my message anyway.

>>5998971
It could backfire if he does end up joining, however, and our guy could end up being a third wheel.

>>5998977
She's probably smart enough to read that.

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>>5998968
>>5998970
>>5998971
>>5998977
>>5998989
You tell her that you're on and that Jon should join too. Heh, there's no way Jon will join, and if he does you'll totally beat his ass-
"Oh! Yeah! That'd be cool! Jon is a really good player! He's like... rank eighty or something."
Goddamnit.
"But yeah," she says, "We should TOTALLY play later tonight! With Jon joining I'm sure it'll be fun."
You imagine Jon as some super-ultra-megadeath player who destroyed anything in his path. Why do you do this to yourself?
>Nevermind, not playing
>Hang up
>Talk about something else
>Do something else (Time Depends)

>>5998967
>>You're on

>>5998967
>genuinely ask her what she sees in Jon
Maybe he saved her life or something.

>>5998994
>>5998997

>>5998994
>>genuinely ask her what she sees in Jon

>>5998994
>Talk about something else
Be a good sport and log on later. Talk about another subject, probably about a time our dude hung out with Felino outdoors, then ask if she's available sometime in the next few days before Jon makes any further plans with her.

>>5998997
+1. But more in a: "hey, how did you decide you liked Jon, anyway? What was it abut him that made you knew it was going to 'click'?" Make it seem like we're getting romantic advice, not questioning her choices or badmouthing her boy.

Come on, question your choices on your own... See US, not HIM!

>>5998994

>>5998997
>>5999003
Seconded. Do this before >>5999004.

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>>5998997
>>5998999
>>5999003
>>5999004
>>5999005
>>5999006
You ask her what she sees in Jon, but frame it as though you're trying to get dating advice.
"Well, he's like, smart and handsome. Super artistic. He can sing. And he's just like, really sweet to boot. Not to mention he likes all the games I like!"
YOU like all the games she likes... You imagine Jon dead. It makes you feel better.
You talk about some general topics, and then ask her if she's ever able to hang out.
"Well, actually, yeah! Me and Jon will be coming down to visit some family in the next few days or so. We can totally hang out then!"
Fuck Jon.
>Badmouth Jon
>Tell her to break up with Jon
>Ask her not to bring Jon
>Ask for more advice
>Learn more about Jon
>Talk about something else
>Go do something else (Time Depends)

>>5999016
>Go do something else (Time Depends)

>>5999016
>>Go do something else (Time Depends)

>>5999016
>Write in
Tell her you'll think about it; you could give an answer when you play vidya with her and Jon later today. Maybe ask her what she would do, hypothetically, if she knew the world was ending in less than a week and how she'd spend it. After the conversation, we should start planning our big outdoors trip.

>"Well, he's like, smart and handsome. Super artistic. He can sing. And he's just like, really sweet to boot. Not to mention he likes all the games I like!"
She seems like a decent person, but not the brightest. We shouldn't let this drag down how the planet's final days go down regardless. Too little time to spend miserable.

>>5999016
>Deflect to after the apocalypse
"Haha, well, if you're still down here in the next SIX days, that would be great! That's when I'm free again."

Bail bail bail, the game is fine, but in-person hangouts with that douche sound AWFUL. We CANNOT spend any amount of our last few days in JON'S foul presence.

>>5999027
>Bail bail bail, the game is fine, but in-person hangouts with that douche sound AWFUL. We CANNOT spend any amount of our last few days in JON'S foul presence.
Agreed. A solo trip isn't such a bad thing. I've got an idea: let's bring a camera, a notebook, and a time capsule. We could take pictures of whatever to place inside the capsule along with whatever we decide to write, then leave in a deep hole on the last day. The world may be ending, but that doesn't mean we can't leave a little something for whoever survives.

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>>5999022
>>5999024
>>5999027
>>5999028
>>5999035
You tell her you'll think about it, and that you'll be on later. You hang up.
You'd really like to hang out with Felino, but is ALSO hanging out with Jon really worth it? Maybe not...
1/2

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>>5999056
You decide you should probably start doing things. You only have so much time after all. The call took you 28 minutes. Man, that was a long time. You've been thinking about taking a trip to a national park or something, but there are also things you can do around town. What now?

DAYS: 5
DAY TIMER: 22:38:00

>National park
>Go see Ralph
>Go see parents
>Go to the mall
>Go to the arcade
>Go to a theatre
>Buy magazines
>Buy "magazines"
>Go to a restaurant
>Go try and meet women
>Something else

>>5999057
>Go see Ralph
He's such a character. Surely his antics will help a bit

>>5999057
>Go see Ralph

>>5999057
>>5999058
Seconded. He's a bit of a hippie, but a solid dude.

>>5999057
>>Go see Ralph

>>5999057
>Go to the mall
>Go try and meet women
Try to pick up chicks while shopping.

>>5999058
>>5999059
>>5999062
Okay, we can also
>Bring Ralph

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>>5999058
>>5999059
>>5999061
>>5999062
>>5999075
You decide to go see Ralph. It takes you an hour to get to his apartment, but you make it.
You met Ralph while working as a cashier at a fast-food restaurant. He'd always come in and order the same thing and kept trying to make conversation with you. Eventually, he asked for your number. You thought he was trying to like, creep on you or something, but because you have zero social skills or ability to stand up for yourself you just... gave it to him. He called you that night and proceeded to talk about the newest episode of Crime Committing Show for 8 hours and then fall asleep. Ever since then, you've been friends or at least something of the sort.
Ralph is a bit of a druggie. That's not even an insult, that's what he calls himself. Despite the fact that he really likes drugs, he also strongly recommends no one do them. Ironically, Ralph works as the chair at an AA place, despite being a raging alcoholic himself. I suppose he just doesn't want people to end up the way he is, despite the fact he always seems pretty fucking content with his situation.
It's sort of embarrassing to tell people he's your only friend, as he could probably pass as your dad or something. You're 22, and he's 49.
As you enter the room, Ralph greets you.
"Yoooo! What is up, my brother!" he says, as that's how he usually greets you, "Feelin' good, because might I say, I am feelin' FIIIIIIIIIINNNNEEEEEEEEEEE..."
You're starting to regret coming here.

DAYS: 5
DAY TIMER: 21:39:00

>>5999085
>Tell him about Felino
>Rant about Jon
>Talk about interests
>Ask for drugs
>Tell about the end of the world
>Talk about something else
>Do something else (Time Depends)

>>5999085
>Tell him about Felino
>Tell about the end of the world
Dude, we are not feeling fiiiiiiineeee.

>>5999085
>>5999091
Agreed. If he's free the next few days and isn't disruptive outdoors, he'd be great to bring along for the trip.

>>5999097
If anyone can stop the end of the world/our horrible death it's Ralph

>>5999091
+1

>>5999086

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>>5999091
>>5999097
>>5999099
>>5999102
You tell him about Felino and Jon.
"Hey, little bro, listen, YOU deserve her, not that guy! You're like, a fucking stud man, I mean look at you."
You look at yourself. You don't see it.
You tell him about the end of the world.
"Ohhhh, shit! Are you on "endoftheworldsoon.com" as well? The Rapture is like, sooooo gonna happen soon or something. We're like, all gonna get sucked up to Heaven."
You wonder if he's right about that. You doubt it. Whatever is gonna happen in the next five days, its nothing good, and you doubt anyone is gonna survive.
>Invite him to hang out
>Talk about the end of the world
>Ask for drugs
>Talk about something else
>Do something else (Time Depends)

>>5999109
>Invite him to hang out
What a good sport

>>5999109
>Invite him to hang out

(Hey, anons, gonna head to bed now! More updates tomorrow!)

>>5999109
>Invite him to hang out
Let's get planning. We can gather supplies today and get back to our place in time to play vidya with Felino. Tomorrow or the day after, we hit the road with Ralph.

>>5999117
Sounds good, QM. Sleep well! Thanks for running.

>>5999109
>Invite him to hang out

>>5999117
Night QM.

>>5999109
>>Invite him to hang out
>>Talk about the end of the world

Try to actually explain that we can see when the world will end.

>>5999117
Goodnight QM. Get good rest.

>>5999109
>Talk about the end of the world
Maybe that websites not /x/ tier.

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>>5999113
>>5999115
>>5999121
>>5999124
>>5999125
>>5999191
You try to talk to him about the end of the world, but he doesn't seem to be taking you too seriously.
"Shit, man, I know! We're all totally gonna get sucked up into the afterlife in the next like, year. I don't know about five days, but it'll like, happen soon, man!"
This guy...
You give it a rest and ask him if he wants to hang out.
"Oh, shit, sure, man! What do you wanna do? We could stay here and chill, hit up the mall, or do like,.. go-karts or something. OH! Shit, or we could hit up the local roadkill and just like, poke it."
You're not so sure about that last suggestion, but some of those things sound like they might be fun.

DAYS: 5
DAY TIMER: 21:37:00

>Go-karts (4 hours)
>Mall (2 hours)
>Hang here (3 hours)
>Hit up roadkill (6 hours)
>Nevermind
>Something else (Time Depends)

>>5999285
>Steal go-karts, drive them into mall
If we're a misanthropic sad bastard might as well cause a bit of chaos, no?

>>5999285
>Go to the mall and hit on thicc bitches.

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>>5999337
>>5999338
You decide to go-kart. Ralph seems pleased with this decision, although he seems to REALLY wanna poke roadkill with sticks.
The go-kart track is at the mall, so you get a chance to look around for a bit before getting started.
As you race, you imagine yourself as some super cool go-kart racer. That would have been a pretty cool life.
Maybe you should have a bit more fun with this.
>-4 hours

DAYS: 5
DAY TIMER: 17:37:00

>Steal go-kart and cause havoc in mall
>Run over go-kart employees
>Go-kart like a normal person
>Steal go-kart and drive to go find roadkill
>Bail from go-kart
>Try to impress women with your go-kart skills
>Something else (Time Depends)

>>5999369
>Steal go-kart and cause havoc in mall
We can make some of our own roadkill!!

>>5999369
make donuts with gokarrt

>>5999393
+1

>>5999380
+1

>>5999369
>Accidentally cause a wreck on the track

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>>5999380
>>5999393
>>5999420
>>5999439
>>5999462
Fuck it, might as well go mad if the world is gonna end soon anyway. You start doing donuts, crashing into walls, and just generally driving recklessly. Ralph yells out to you. "Hey! Fido! Stop, man, you're gonna get someone hurt!"
You don't stop though, your driving becomes more and more reckless the more time passes. This is actually really fun. You've never felt such adrenaline... Fuck it, you're crashing into someone. As you start driving towards another go-karter at full speed, getting ready to run them off the road, your wheels suddenly catch on fire, and in a panic, you swerve off the road and hit the wall. You immediately get out of your go-kart, which bursts into flames.
Fuck.
>Flee the scene
>Steal someone's go-kart
>Call for help
>Stop someone and ask them what to do
>Find Ralph
>Something else (Time Depends)

>>5999497
>Find Ralph
>Convince him to steal a kart together
The world is literally gonna end and we hate most stuff in it

>>5999497
>>Find Ralph
>Flee the scene on another go-kart

>This is what happens when I'm gone
Fuck.

>>5999497
>Find Ralph
>Call for help
I don't know why the fuck Fido thought he'd want to spend these last days in jail. He can say the turning wheel or one of the tires lost control. There's still prepping for the trip and making it to the vidya session with Felino.

>>5999497
>Call for help
>Look for an extinguisher

>>5999497
>Find Ralph
>Call a lawyer

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>>5999520
>>5999522
>>5999533
>>5999639
>>5999650
You call out for Ralph, who you see getting off his go-kart and fleeing the scene.
"Sorry, man! Fuck this! I'm on probation!"
He IS on probation.
Without you really having to do anything, a disgruntled mall employee walks in with a bucket of water and puts out the fire. Seems like she's done this before. Maybe this is a common occurrence?

DAYS: 5
DAY TIMER: 17:27:00

>Talk to employee
>Get out of there before they press charges
>Just go home (1 hour)
>Try to explain yourself
>Pretend to be injured so you can sue the go-kart place
>Call a lawyer
>Something else (Time Depends)

>>5999681
>>Get out of there before they press charges
>>But quickly apologize and pretend it was an accident

>>5999681
>Talk to employee
>Try to explain yourself

>>5999681
>Seduce employee

>>5999694
That's the idea, maybe, but let's start low-key and get a feel for her. This isn't a great first impression.

>>5999681
>Talk to employee
wagie gf route?

>>5999694
>Seduce employee
>"Hey, it was ME who crashed that kart. Impressed?"

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>>5999682
>>5999683
>>5999694
>>5999695
>>5999699
>>5999703
You try to talk to the employee and explain yourself. She cuts you off.
"I don't talk to psychos. Are you a psycho, psycho?"
>You're a psycho
>You're not a psycho
>Flirt
>Explain yourself
>Something else (Time Depends)

>>5999710
>>You're not a psycho
>>Also offhandedly mention you all are going to die

>>5999710
"I blend elements of psychopathy and rage at the modern world with sudden impulsive actions. This is a new thing I started doing like a few hours ago, and it rocks. I advise you to join me in this endeavour because the world is gonna like... combust in a few days and you don't wanna die a wagecuck."
>and then prove our sincerity by throwing our shoe at the wall. If we have a shoe.

>>5999716
On the ine hand, depressed goth-looking wagie GF would be gewat. On the other hand, this is too funny not to do. May have to leg it if it fails, though, so...

>+1, but keep the shoe

>>5999710

>>5999724
>>5999714

+1

>>5999710
>Explain yourself

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>>5999714
>>5999716
>>5999724
>>5999729
>>5999742
You explain, rather bluntly, that you are basically completely insane, impulsive, and misanthropic. Oh, and you also casually mention the world is going to end soon, and so she should join you on your escapades. This is sure to impress the ladies.
"What, so you're some kind of weirdo schizoid anarchist? That's pretty dumb."
You insist that you are totally serious, and as proof of your total hardcore badassery and lack of impulse control, you... pick up her empty bucket and drop it from above your head with the intention of breaking it. It does not.
The girl chortles. "Yeah, real hardcore."
>Insist that you are indeed hardcore
>Use humor to cope with your social ineptitude
>Flirt
>Something else (Time Depends)

>>5999750
>Flirt, acting like it was all a gag.

>Verification not required.

>>5999750
>Insist that you are indeed hardcore
>Talk about something else
Start it off with "Real." OP, is the weekend soon? We could try to bring her along if Ralph ends up not being available.

>>5999750
We made her laugh! The woman-thing is basically BEGGING for our love. Initiate Operation: Hardcore
>Insist that you are indeed hardcore
>Flirt

>>5999755
+1

>>5999752
+1
Girls like a guy who makes them laugh, and also grungy failed musicians. R-right?

>>5999750

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>>5999752
>>5999755
>>5999759
>>5999769
You make a joke about how completely insane you are, before doubling down on your hardcore-ness and talking about all the hardcore things you've done, such as stealing a pencil in high school.
She laughs again. "Listen, guy, you should probably get out of here before my boss shows up. He's the type to press charges. You're funny, though."
>Go home (1 hour)
>Leave mall
>Look for Ralph
>Ask her name
>Make more conversation
>Do something else (Time Depends)

>>5999800
>Look for Ralph
Did you get enough sleep op?

>>5999755
(In the quest it is currently Friday, so the next day will be the start of the weekend!)
>>5999801
(Not really, lol. Why do you ask?)

>>5999800
>Introduce yourself and ask for her name
>Then leave and look for Ralph

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>>5999801
>>5999807
You introduce yourself and ask her what her name is.
"Fido, huh? Lily. Anyway, Fido, you should probably get out of here now."
You begin to walk away, but she stops you.
"But first, here."
She hands you a slip of paper.
"Now, go fuck off so you don't get arrested."
You leave the mall and search around for where Ralph could have run off. Eventually, you find him cowering in a dumpster.
"Hey... you weren't followed, were you? No cops came?"
You explain that no, no cops came, and that running away and hiding in a dumpster after seeing an accident looks VERY suspicious.
"Yeah, yeah, sorry, man... I just don't wanna go back to jail is all."
Ralph had been in and out of jail many times for relatively minor offenses. According to him, jail sucks.
>Talk
>Draw on alley walls
>Scold Ralph
>Call the cops and frame Ralph for what happened
>Check slip of paper
>Go home (1 hour)
>Do something else (Time Depends)

>>5999882
>Draw on alley walls
>Talk
Then we can check the slip of paper when we go back home.

>>5999882
>>5999888
Agreed, but we should shop for camping stuff before heading home if enough heat is off our back.

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>>5999882
I woulda done the same thing in Ralph's shoes. Can't fault a guy for that.
>Draw on alley walls
>Talk
>Check Slip

>>5999882
>>Draw on alley walls
>>Talk

>>5999803
>Why do you ask?
Time between updates seemed short.
>>5999882
>Check slip of paper

>>5999895
+1 to these three.

>>5999882
Also:
>Check put that Alienfest poster

>>5999882
>the classic go-kart crash gambit actually worked

>>5999882
>>5999925
Amending
>>5999895
to also include
>Take that fucking poster it rules

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>>5999888
>>5999893
>>5999895
>>5999921
>>5999922
>>5999925
>>5999944
>>5999948
You finally decide to give the slip Lily gave you a little look-see. It's... oh, shit... You, Fido Ballthrow, just got a girl's number. You think you should crash go-karting more often.
"What's that?" Ralph asks.
You tell him. He's immediately ecstatic and gives you a high-five.
"Hell yeah! I told you you're a fucking stud, man!"
Hell, maybe he's right. If only you knew.
You begin absent-mindedly drawing on the walls with a piece of chalk you bring with you everywhere. Yes, you keep a piece of black, red, and white chalk on you at all times. Eventually, you notice the poster.
"ALIEN FEST
SUNDAY
At abandoned where house here: [INSERT ADREESS]
All bands and genres welcome (except pop, go fuck yourself), no admission fee because that'd be dumb. 3 am, be there or die."
Hmm... could be interesting. You pocket the poster to hang it up in your room since it is pretty sick.
"Oh, yo, you noticed that too? Hell yeah. I'm heading down to try to sell my recordings, you should totally go too, man!"
Sounds like it could be fun. Maybe a bit pretentious... but fun. Who knows, maybe you could get up and perform something?

DAYS: 5
DAY TIMER: 17:15:00

>Go home (1 hour)
>Talk more with Ralph
>Go back to Ralph's place (1 hour)
>Get something to eat
>Call someone
>Do something else (Time Depends)

>>5999975
lets get some actual food, we have our vigor back and can't be bothered to starve now/ remember to call the mall goth afterward and ask if she'd be down for alienfest

>>5999992
+1

>>5999992
+1

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>>5999992
>>5999998
>>6000024
You say goodbye to Ralph and decide to go get something to eat.
You go to the only place you know of where you can get food for free, and that's your Aunt's pizza place. Your hand is super buff, 6 feet tall, and you've seen her strangle a fully grown man to unconsciousness before, but she's pretty much the only member of your family you regularly talk to, and doesn't see you as a total screw-up, which you kinda are.
Every time you come in, she makes you a veggie pizza on the house. She doesn't talk much, but when she does it's usually her trying to convince you to go to church with her.
>-1 hour

DAYS: 5
DAY TIMER: 16:15:00

>Call Lily
>Call Ralph
>Call Mom
>Go home (2 hours)
>Talk
>Do something else (Time Depends)

>>6000049
>Talk
>Agree to go to church with her once if she asks

>>6000049
>>6000050
+1 this. If anyone can save us besides Ralph it's our homie J Chrizzle

>>6000050
+1

>talk
Ask them how their day was.

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>>6000050
>>6000052
>>6000056
>>6000064
You tell your Aunt you might be interested in coming to church with her at some point.
"Oh, good," she says.
She doesn't say anything else, as usual, but she seems pleased. You're pretty sure she's a Jehovah's Witness or something, but you've never really cared to ask her. She's the only religious person in your family. All the rest are some brand of atheism. You're still on the fence about the whole thing, but attending a sermon or two couldn't hurt. Or, well, your dad is "spiritual" or something, but you don't really talk to him. Your Aunt is kind of a black sheep because of it. Maybe that's why you both get along so well.
You ask her how her day was.
"Good," she says.
She's not really one for conversation.
>Call Lily
>Call Ralph
>Call Mom
>Go home (2 hours)
>Talk
>Do something else (Time Depends)

>>6000111
>Go home (2 hours)
>Call Ralph
Nice get.

>>6000111
>Eat pizza
>Go home
Is it time for the vidya games?

>>6000111
>>Eat pizza
>>Go home

>>6000111
>Eat pizza
>Call Lily
>Ask her if she likes vidya

>>6000049
(Was reading through and notices a few typos, wanted to clarify before I update anymore.)
"Your aunt is super buff"
>>5999975
"Maybe you should crash go-karts more often"
"warehouse"
"[INSERT ADRESS]"
(I was barely awake while writing a lot of this, so that's probably why lol.)

>call lily
Right away, felino is already in a relationship and that path corrupts our innocence on the romantic plane. You've got a couple days left and she did say suggest she was into hardcore, nothing more hardcore than moving as fast as possible. GO GO GO

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>>6000112
>>6000121
>>6000127
>>6000210
>>6000792
You finish your pizza and head home. Once you get in the door, you collect the blankets and pillows from your little closet fort and put them back on your bed. You also put that sick Alienfest poster up.
You stand in your room. You aren't sure what to do now. It's getting dark out, so there might not be much of a point in going out unless you wanna go to a bar or commit a crime.
What now?
>-2 hours

DAYS: 5
DAY TIMER: 13:52:00

>Browse internet
>Play video games
>Call someone
>Take the easy way out (End Quest)
>Practice instrument
>Listen to music
>Practice instrument
>Do something else (Time Depends)

>>6000803
>>Call someone
Lily

>>6000803
Sure let's call Lily. We can invite her, and she's probably already aware of Alienfest since she graffiti'd the wall next to it.

>>6000803
>Call lily.
She likes it hardcore, and you didn't even have to ask! CALL HER!

>>6000803
>Play video games
Call Lily tomorrow. Maybe. Depends how game night with Felino goes.

>>6000803
Let's call Lily. If the world is going to end in five days, we could maybe make it our goal to score.

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>>6000811
>>6000816
>>6000827
>>6000844
>>6001002
Fuck it. You decide to give Lily a call. She likes hardcore stuff or whatever, so maybe she'd like that you're calling her so early.
She picks up.
"Wow. I like, just got home, psycho, cool down."
You're at first worried that she's actually mad at you, but you soon realize she's joking.
"God, my fucking boss made me help him lock up, and then we got into this LOOOOONG conversation about his kids and all that other boring shit. You're not boring, are you, psycho?"
>You're boring
>You're not boring
>Tell her to stop calling you "psycho"
>Talk about something else
>Hang up
>Do something else (Time Depends)

(Sorry for such a long time between updates, got caught up in some stuff.)

>>6001013
>>You're not boring
>>Tell her to stop calling you "psycho"
>Tell her about the Alien Fest going on and invite her
>Ask if she wants to come over and play video games

>>6001013
>You HOPE you're not boring (joked about in a dorkishly suave way)
>What's she up to
>Tell her about the Alien Fest going on and invite her

>DON'T tell her to stop calling you "psycho"
This is a cute nickname

>>6001013
>You're not boring
>Embrace the nickname
>Tell her about the Alien Fest going on and invite her
>Don't invite her to game night, in case we spill our spaghetti

>>6001013
>You're not boring
>Tell her about the Alien Fest going on and invite her
>Embrace the nickname

>>6001013
>You're not boring
>Embrace the nickname
>Tell her about the Alien Fest going on and invite her
We can do this, we've just got to be cool.

>>6001013
>>You're boring

>invite over
Shell know what it's for. We've already achieved public display of hardcoreness so she doesn't need to check us there, AND shes already talking comfortable- she's home talking. That's close enough to bed-room.

Go for it. Here telling about her day like you know each other well is fast familiarity. She wants it bro.

>>6001329
No, I'm right. Nothing more exciting than a fling with a crazy stranger. Bro. WE HAVE THIS. SHE GAVE US HERE NUMBER WITHOUT US ASKING. SHE WAS INTERESTED. SHES FAMILIARIZING HERSELF. THATS DAY CIRCUIT- FINISH HER DAY!!!!

TEASE, THEN INVITE OVER. SHELL SAY VIDEO GAMES ARE BORING, BUT SHE'LL KNOW ITS NOT FOR VIDEO GAMES. SHE LIKES EXCITEMENT, THE TENSION HERE HAS HER. IM ON IT. INVITE HER.

>hang up
She's being gay

>>6001013
>You're not boring
>Embrace the nickname
>Tell her about the Alien Fest going on and invite her

>>6001434
She doesn't seem overly cheerful to me, and I personally clock her as capable of heterosexual attraction. :)

>>6001013
>You're not boring
>Embrace the nickname
>Use the word "hardcore" excessively
We must establish our FIRM commitment to HARDCORE THOUGHT PATTERNS if we're gonna endear ourselves to her. Also:
>Tell her about Alienfest

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>>6001015
>>6001032
>>6001033
>>6001049
>>6001054
>>6001307
>>6001329
>>6001331
>>6001434
>>6001441
>>6001473
>>6001505
You tell her that you're not boring, and decide to embrace the nickname of "psycho" since it's what she keeps calling you.
"Not boring, gotcha." she says, before laughing, "I'm gonna hold you to that, you know. Because nine times out of ten people who claim not to be boring are boring."
You ask her if she knows about Alienfest.
"Ah, shit, don't remind me. Me and my band were supposed to play it, but they kicked me out. Now I don't know what I'm gonna do the day of."
You ask her if she wants to go with you.
"What, and watch my old band play without me? Fuck that, psycho. I don't have much interest in going unless I can get up on stage."
Sounds like she's a musician. Huh.
>Nevermind
>Tell her she can join your band
>Ask her what she plays
>Try to convince her to go anyway
>Invite her over
>Change the subject
>Hang up, and do something else (Time Depends)

>>6001544
>Ask her what she plays
>Ask why they kicked her out
>Assuage her ego

>>6001544
>>Tell her she can join your band
>>Ask her what she plays
>>Try to convince her to go anyway

Let’s go there and get her up on stage! If the world’s gonna end, we might as well do something nice before it’s gone for good!

>>6001544
>Ask her what she plays
>Assuage her ego
>"Then get on that stage, it doesn't have to be with them. What's stoppin you?"

>>6001544
>Ask her what she plays
>Assuage her ego
>"Then get on that stage, it doesn't have to be with them. What's stoppin you?"
>Mention your band, and if she plays soemthing that could work with yours, offer to let her play with you, if you can get in

>>6001544
>Ask her what she plays
>Tell her you're a musician
>Call Ralph to figure out if he plays music
If the world ends and we're rocking out with our buddies, that's a pretty hardcore finale.

>>6001544
Ralph has music? Introduce them as an excuse to meet up with her?

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>>6001547
>>6001548
>>6001570
>>6001582
>>6001586
>>6001589
You ask her why they kicked her out.
"Just didn't like me, I guess. They were shit friends anyway."
You ask why she doesn't just play by herself.
She laughs. "Because I play the bass, psycho. Who the hell is gonna watch a solo bass performance unless whoever's playing is like... Mozart reincarnated or something? Not that he played the bass but... you know what I mean."
You assuage her ego by telling her the bass is a super cool instrument, and that you're sure she could do a solo performance.
"Ha! Don't lie to me. Besides, I'm more comfortable playing with a band anyway."
And then, on a whim, after hearing those words, you tell her she can join YOUR band.
"Your band? You have a band? What's it called? Who's in it?"
No, you don't have a band. Your old band kicked you out too, and that was like three years ago. You haven't even really played since, and the old guitar you used to play you smashed. Now all you have is a banjitar. What are you supposed to tell her?
>Make up a fake name
>Admit your lie
>Tell her you want to start a band
>Hang up, and do something else (Time Depends)

>>6001595
>Tell her you want to start a band
"I'm starting a band. Psycho and the Crawlers. Ralph's getting on the drums. It's going to be legit."

>>6001595
"We are called The Doomed, on account of the end of the world and such. It's me and my buddy Ralph."
>silently pray that Ralph is gonna be on board with this

>>6001595
>>Tell her you want to start a band
Let's call ourselves, "The End of the World."

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>>6001598
>>6001601
>>6001610
You tell her you're in a band with your friend Ralph, who is also a musician. You pray that Ralph will be down for the whole thing.
"Okay. What's the band name? You still haven't told me that."
Shit. You have to come up with something fast.
>"Psycho and the Crawlers" because of the nickname she gave you.
>"The Doomed" because everyone is totally doomed. Sound pretty hardcore.
>"The End of the World" for obvious reasons. A somewhat neutral name.
>"Rapture". Might appeal to Ralph.
>"Super Nova" because the sun exploding is a huge contender for what might destroy the world. Catchy, recognizable.
>Nevermind
>Hang up, and do something else (Time Depends)

>>6001595
>Tell her you want to start a band
>Make up a name
Ninja skull fuckers with lasers
or short: NSFW lasers

>>6001619
>"The Doomed" because everyone is totally doomed. Sound pretty hardcore.

>>6001619
>"Psycho and the Crawlers" because of the nickname she gave you.
I still think this is the best band name because it doesn't lean into the end of the world thing

>>6001619
>>"The Doomed" because everyone is totally doomed. Sound pretty hardcore.

>>6001619
>>"Super Nova" because the sun exploding is a huge contender for what might destroy the world. Catchy, recognizable.

>>6001619
>"The Doomed" because everyone is totally doomed. Sound pretty hardcore
Excellent. Good. We have this totally under control. HahahahahaaaaAAAAAA

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>>6001634
>>6001635
>>6001644
>>6001649
>>6001650
You tell her your band name is "The Doomed", but make sure to mention it's able to be changed if she doesn't like it.
"The Doomed, huh? Lily D. Fisher, bassist of The Doomed... I could get used to it. Where do you practice?"
You tell her you practice at your apartment, which you regret since your apartment is a mess.
"And apartment? How quiet are you? If we do make this a thing we could practice at my place. I've got a garage."
You ask her where her place is.
"Well, it's... my dad's place, really, but it's more my place than his, no matter what the paper says. He won't mind though, me and my old band used to hang out here all the time. He's up in his bedroom mostly, so he doesn't bother me."
Hm, a garage. You used to practice in your drummer's garage back when you used to play. This could work as long as Ralph is on board.
>Okay, she's in
>Need some time to consider
>Set a date to meet up
>Invite her over
>Nevermind
>Hang up, and do something else (Time Depends)

>>6001682
"An apartment?"*

>>6001682
>Okay, she's in
"We'll call you once we've let our buddy know... I mean ME, I'LL call you once I've let MY buddy know. I'm not crazy, hahahaha."

>>6001682
>>Okay, she's in

>>6001682
Practice on your instrument.

>>6001682
>Okay, she's in
>Set a date to meet up
How about tomorrow? We don't have long before the world e--before, uh, Alienfest, after all!

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>>6001687
>>6001690
>>6001697
>>6001719
You tell her she's in.
"Okay, cool. So, what, we meet up tomorrow? We need to at least spend a bit of time practicing before Alienfest."
You tell her that could work.
"Alright, nice. The Doomed. I like it. See you then, I suppose. I'll send over my address."
She sends over her address. Hell yeah.
>Invite her over
>Talk more
>Go play video games with Felino and Jon
>Hang up, and do something else (Time Depends)

>>6001722
>Go get Raplh
We've got to talk him into joining our band.

>>6001722
>Warn her that we're not that good.

>>6001722
Tell Ralph.

>>6001725
>Get Ralph, convince him to join our band
>See if there's somewhere we can nab a new guitar and not that banjitar

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>>6001725
>>6001726
>>6001731
>>6001732
You call Ralph and ask him if he wants to form a band with you and your friend.
"FUCK YES! YES! I WAS WAITING FOR THIS DAY! I GOT MY SNARE DRUM READY!"
Snare drum? You ask him what he means.
"I play the snare drum man! ONLY the snare drum! Shit's sick!"
Oh God.
You tell him the meeting place and who Lily is, and hang up.
Okay, band started. You really hope this goes well. This could either be amazing, or absolutely terrible. You have a banjo/guitar player, a bass player, and a... snare... player. This is doable... right?
You think about buying a new guitar but remember you're too broke. You sometimes see old ones lying around at the dump, so maybe you could take a look around there tomorrow, spend some time "in the garage" so to speak, and fix up a guitar for yourself.
Now what?

DAYS: 5
DAY TIMER: 13:32:00

>Call someone else
>Play video games with Felino and Jon
>Go to the dump
>Do something else (Time Depends)

>>6001910
>Play video games with Felino and Jon

>>6001910
>Play video games with Felino and Jon

>>6001910
>>Play video games with Felino and Jon

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>>6001911
>>6001913
>>6001915
You decide to finally play video games with Felino and Jon.
You start up your console, set everything up, and get on call. When you enter the call, Jon immediately greets you.
"Hey, what's up, Fido, bro! Can I call you Fibro?"
No, he cannot call you Fibro. Well, that's what you want to say, but you just give him a "yeah".
"It's been wayyyyy too long, Fibro! When's the last time we've even BEEN in a call together?"
Felino giggles. "I don't know... Maybe back when he was still with his band?"
"OHHH! Yeah, his band! Dude, I heard some of your shizz, it was great, man!"
Jon doesn't swear. He doesn't say shit, or fuck, or anything. He doesn't even say damn. He says this is because he believes "profanity is unbecoming". Ever since Felino started dating him, she's stopped swearing too.
You finally get to play the game. The game is both an RTS and a first-person shooter. One team controls the titular Zolfor's Fortress, sending out troops to defend it and such, while another tries to make its way to the fortress with FPS-style gameplay. It's pretty fun.
You, Jon, and Felino all prefer to play on the FPS team. You play Shotgun Wizard, the best character, Felino plays Mrs. Magicwoman, the healer character, and Jon plays... Michael Stabman... the melee character. Why in God's name anyone would play a melee character in an FPS you don't know, but you don't really get Jon in general, so maybe you shouldn't think about it too hard.
Jon does really well. Better than you. WAYYYY better than you. Now, you are the second on the leaderboard the whole time, but he still gets way more kills than you.
Eventually, later in the round, all of your team is dead, except for you and Jon. You're close to the fortress, and you're making good progress. You go a bit further ahead and start filling one of the stronger enemies with lead, getting him really low. Yes! This could be your chance to-
Jon kills him. He steals your fucking kill.
"Woah, good job, bro! Teamwork!"
Jon starts chanting "teamwork" into the mic while Felino audibly claps. At this point, you're seething, but can't say anything.
Eventually, your team wins, and Jon gets all kinds of praise while you get none. Jon does send you a DM though. "You did great man!" it says, "Keep it up!"
You really hate him.
You all talk for a while after the game about random stuff. Eventually, Jon brings up... fitness.
"Yeah, I've gotten into lifting recently!" he says, "Been like eating a bunch of protein and stuff too."
He turns his attention to you.
"Do you work out, Fido? If so we should totally do it together sometime!"
>-3 hours

DAYS: 5
DAY TIMER: 10:32:00

>Yes, you work out
>No, you don't
>Change the subject
>Tell Jon off
>Say something subtly mean
>Hang up
>Do something else (Time Depends)

>game with felino and jon
Or
>Call mom

>>6001976
>No, you don't

>>6001976
>>No, you don't
But ask about it just for shits and giggles. Wouldn’t hurt to try before the end of the world.

>>6001976
>No, you don't

>>6001976
>Change the subject
He's gonna' make us look bad in front of Felino. :(

>>6001976
>Jon actually seems like a cool guy.
>Change mind about Jon.

>>6001976
>No, you don't
Tell him that you've got a new band started and you want to really focus on that so we won't really have time to work out.

>>6001976
I can support >>600241's idea to change the subject to our band.
Also, I meant to say: really cool art style shift to convey the video game world, QM!

>>6001976
No, you don't. Music is a more appropriate pursuit for doomsaying. It's hard to communicate an "end of days" message through muscular tension.

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>>6001987
>>6001991
>>6002345
>>6002360
>>6002382
>>6002415
>>6002424
>>6002521
You tell them that you don't work out. Felino seems confused.
"What, like not at all?" she asks, "Like you don't go outside?"
Jon chimes in. "Nah! I'm sure Fibro goes outside. Don't worry man fitness isn't for everyone."
Fitness isn't for everyone...? FITNESS ISN'T FOR EVERYONE?! WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN? IS HE TRYING TO IMPLY FITNESS ISN'T FOR YOU? YOU COULD BE FIT! YOU COULD BE EVEN FITTER THAN HIM!
"Either way, man, you should join me sometime when we come down to visit this weekend!"
JOIN HIM?! JOIN HIM?! HE SHOULD BE JOINING YOU! WHY DOES HE GET TO BE FELINO'S BOYFRIEND ANYWAY, HUH? WHAT THE FUCK DID HE DO TO DESERVE SUCH A TITLE? YOU'VE YET TO FIND ANY REASON WHY FUCKING JON IS SO GREAT AND YOU'RE NOT!
DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE JON DIE DIE! DIE JON! DIE DIE! DIE JON DIE!
YOU HOPE THAT WHEN THE WORLD FINALLY MERCIFUL EXPLODES AND TAKES YOU OUT OF THIS DUMB WORLD, ALL OF JON SURVIVES SAVE FOR HIS PENIS, AND HE IS FORCED TO FLOAT AROUND SPACE FOREVER A PENISLESS FREAK FOR ALL ETERNITY!
You calm down after a few seconds. Not that you were showing your complete rage at Jon's very existence externally, but it was certainly.
Jon... Jon, Jon, Jon... Maybe you should show him who's boss? Or not...
>Tell off Jon
>Continue being nice
>Say something passive-aggressive
>Hang up and do something else (Time Depends)

>>6002569
MERCIFULLY EXPLODES*

>>6002569
but it was certainly there.*

>>6002569
>Say something passive-aggressive

>>6002569
>Cool off
It's the last days of the world. Fido doesn't need to spend it agitated and he's got fun plans with Lily and Ralph coming up anyway.

>>6002569
>Decline the offer
>Then say we're busy and hang up on them.

>>6002606
+1

>>6002569
>Cool off
We don't want to die acting like a total incel

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>>6002597
>>6002600
>>6002606
>>6002623
>>6002637
You mumble something under your breath but don't get up the nerve to actually say it, so you try to cool off and tell them you have to go.
"Alright, see you, Fibro! We should totally do this again sometime!"
Yeah right.
Damn that guy. His very presence makes you angry. You aren't even sure why. Maybe you need to do something to make yourself feel better... or just rest.

DAYS: 5
DAY TIMER: 10:02:00

>Sleep
>Go to the liquor store, buy a bottle, and drink the frustration away
>Call someone
>Practice music
>Go for a walk
>Do something else (Time Depends)

>>6002670
>Go to the liquor store, buy a bottle, and drink the frustration away
>Practice music (while drunk)

>>6002670
>Practice music

>>6002670
>Do something else (Time Depends)
>Get Truck-Kun'd on the way to the liquor store and wake up in the maid world. Where all the girls are qt maids. Naturally this is depressing because I am a doomer.

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>>6002685
>>6002688
>>6002695
You decide to head down to the liquor store to buy something to soothe your suffering. You buy the strongest thing you can find, and head up to the counter, setting it down.
You look up and are met by the gaze of... oh God... HIM. AJ Mathers, a guy from your old high school. He used to pick on you back in the day. He even dated Felino for a while til she found out how he treated you and dumped him. After that, his abuse got worse, and he basically totally terrorized you for the rest of high school. And now... he's here.
"Fido?" he asks, "Hey, man, been a while."
That stupid shit-eating grin you remember so well spreads across his face.
"Can I see some ID, sir?"
You tell him he knows who you are so he shouldn't need any ID.
"Nope, never met you in my life, gaywad. Now give me your ID."
You sigh, and hand it over to him. He starts reading it over, taking WAY too long.
Eventually, tired of waiting, you try to take it from him, but he raises it up above his head.
"Nope! Not done reading, buddy. The text is pretty small, it could take me a WHILE to totally understand it. Maybe I'll take it with me to do a bit of studying."
This asshole is just fucking with you now. He used to steal your school ID back in the day and make you have to register for a new one.
God, you hate him. Maybe you should give him what he deserves?

DAYS: 5
DAY TIMER: 09:02:00

>Beat his ass
>Ask him to give it back
>Pay him and just leave
>Vandalize the store
>Something else (Time Depends)

>>6002740
>Something else (Time Depends)
Get the manager.

>>6002747
+1

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>>6002747
>>6002752
You threaten to get the manager.
"HA! You're seriously a pussy. My manager isn't here, retard, it's the middle of the night. And, guess what, no cameras either!"
Goddamnit.
>Beat his ass
>Ask him to give it back
>Pay him and just leave
>Vandalize the store
>Something else (Time Depends)

>>6002755
>Beat his ass
Pick up that bottle and fucking bludgeon him

>>6002755
>Pay him and just leave

If he doesn't let us,
>Ask him to give the ID back and leave
>Threaten to call the cops otherwise

>>6002757
Do you really want to spend your last days in jail?

>1 post by this ID
Go figure.

>>6002760
+1
Don't rise to his bait. We have pussy to slay.

>>6002755
Beat his ass. Apply bottle directly to forehead for best results.

>>6002760
+1
>Make passive aggressive comments to get him riled up, then sic the cops on his ass

>>6002760
Actually, changing vote to this. +1
BUT, remember him. Put him on "The List". On our last day alive, we can go around beating the fuck out of everybody we don't like, since the world will be ending before prison is really an issue.

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>>6002757
>>6002760
>>6002765
>>6002766
>>6002774
>>6002785
You make a couple of passive-aggressive comments as you get ready to leave, him unbothered and laughing at you.
Eventually, though, you make the mistake of saying something about his mother not raising him right. He immediately goes quiet and stands in front of you as you try to leave.
"What... the FUCK... did you say about my mother?" he asks.
He reaches down his pants and pulls out... a fucking gun?!
He starts waving the gun around in your face and towering over you.
"This isn't high school anymore, buddy. You don't FUCK with me..."
His finger is on the trigger, and a part of you feels like he actually might shoot... What do you do?
>Grab the bottle and defend yourself
>Apologize and give him money
>Try to run into the bathroom
>Try to talk him down
>Call his bluff
>Try to take the gun
>Do something else (Time Depends)

>>6002786
>Try to take the gun
This is always the solution.

>>6002786
Okay, scratch that, maiming time. Didn't he say there are no cameras? Bludgeon forehead with glass bottle.

>>6002786
>Call his bluff
People are expecting me and will find out if i'm late, enjoy getting raped in prison if you kill me retard.

>Call his bluff
He's too PUSSY to do it

>>6002786
>Call his bluff
This guy >>6002801 has the right idea. Have Fido tell him that people know he's here and would catch on quick if they don't hear back. The lack of any sign of struggle would make any lies about attempts to rob the store moot. Mathers seemed to get pissed off about getting told his mother didn't raise him properly. Deep down, he knows he'd only prove Fido right if he pulls the trigger.

>>6002843
Alright, alright changing my vote to this

>>6002786
>Just leave
Fuck this, why are we even here?

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>>6002791
>>6002792
>>6002801
>>6002832
>>6002843
>>6002846
>>6002862
You call his bluff, telling him that if he shoots you he goes to jail and that you have people who expect to see you tomorrow.
He laughs.
"You think I fucking care about that...? I've killed people. I kill people and I ENJOY IT!"
Jesus this guy's an edgelord, but a part of you believes what he's saying. You remember hearing rumors about him torturing animals and threatening other students with weapons. Apparently, he even beat up his father once... Is it really that far-fetched that he'd kill someone?
You tell him if he doesn't stop, he'll lose his job.
Out of nowhere, before you can even finish your thought, this edgy dickhead PISTOL WHIPS you in the fucking nose. You fall down on your back, bleeding profusely. He also knocks your bottle and other things off the counter.
"YOU THINK I FUCKING CARE? I put GASOLINE in my boss' coffee! Just to see what it does! I'm so fucking hardcore man you don't even understand!"
Perhaps he is hardcore. He's fucking annoying though. You DEFINITELY don't wanna be killed by this loser.
>Try to run
>Reach for bottle
>Reach for gun
>Kick him
>Call for help
>Tell him to shoot you
>Call his bluff again
>Apologize
>Threaten to call the cops
>Do something else (Time Depends)

>>6002889
lets just bail man let him enjoy making darn gasoline coffees while end of the world is near

(also we should go buy bandage from mall and stick it to our snoot nose so we'd look like ryan gosling )

>>6002889
>Tell him that none of this matters and that his entire life will amount to nothing since everyone and everything is going to end in five days
Hit him with a nihilistic crisis, edgelords are susceptible to them

>>6002889
>Curl into a fetal position and cry
This weakness will preserve our lives. We'll come back with an assault rifle and maybe Ralph later.

>>6002889
>"YOU THINK I FUCKING CARE? I put GASOLINE in my boss' coffee! Just to see what it does! I'm so fucking hardcore man you don't even understand!"

You know what?
>Tell him to prove that he poured gasoline in his boss's coffee.

Come on bitch boy, let's see the proof.

>>6002889
Firstly, good on him for putting gasoline in his boss' coffee. No cameras? In a liquor shop? What are we, fucking retarded?

Secondly, this can work out quite good for us. We're meeting Lily later, right? Bitches love taking care of guys they're into. Plus, it may give us some pity points when she sees our "band".

That said,
>Reach for gun

I need to see this happen.

>>6002930
+1

>>6002889
I don't believe him.
We know we'll die in five days, right? So... We can't die today! Right??

>>6002889
>Reach for bottle
There's still time to cave his skull in!

>>6002889
>Talk about your own hardcore shit. You just crashed a car some time ago!

>>6002930
+1, and then we slam his head on the table.

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>>6002901
>>6002904
>>6002917
>>6002930
>>6002938
>>6002951
>>6002967
>>6002994
>>6003003
You tell him about the meaninglessness of existence and the fact you're all gonna die, before accusing him of lying about the gasoline coffee.
"Oh, I'm fucking lying? I'm fucking lying? Okay, loser, I'll show you who's fucking lying! Stay here! And if you try anything... I swear I'll kill you..."
He goes outside for a moment, before coming back in with one of the gas pumper thingies.
He drags you by the back of your neck into the back room. He places his gun down on the table, which is where the coffee machine is and begins pouring gas into the coffee machine.
"SEE! I FUCKING TOLD YOU! AND GUESS WHAT... YOU'RE GONNA DRINK THIS FUCKING COFFEE!"
The madman actually did it... This guy is definitely dangerous. What are you doing? It's also worth mentioning... you have a matchbook in your pocket.
>Go for the gun
>Light a match and throw it into the coffee pot
>Jump him
>Run
>Talk
>Do something else (Time Depends)

>>6003188
>Light a match and throw it at coffee pot
Can we stop pussyfooting around because we're scared of jail and just MURDER this FREAK already? We're a psycho after all. And we're even more isolated now, it'll be chalked up to the local madman being a madman.

>>6003188
>Light a match and throw it into the coffee pot
I;m sure this won't backfire on us.

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>>6003188
>Light a match and throw it into the coffee pot
There is. No other. Option.

>>6003188
>Light a match and throw it into the coffee pot
We have no choice but to burn it all down.