>>5381067
>Male
I've been waiting for a quest like this!

>>5381067
>Trans
Go on OP. Do it.
Prove to me you’re going to actually do this quest, bitch.

>>5381069
>>5381076

Ok. You're a trans male Lizard Person!

>where are you located

What region of earth do you start out in?

>also

Didn't really think this quest out so feel free to suggest anything.

If you feel like i'm not doing the thread justice anyone may take control of the thread.

>>5381091
Why did you even start a quest with no plan?

I vote for Cold Lake, Alberta, Canada.

>>5381091
Oh boy, you're really selling it. C'mon, man, you've gotta get into it a little!

>>5381106
+1 to Canada, I guess.

>>5381091
>>5381067

+1

>>5381106
>support

shainpshinfting

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>>5381106
>>5381139
You teleport to cold lake Alberta Canada using your teleportation abilities you learned along with your shape shifting ability.

>what time of day is it

You see a moose in the distance looking in your direction, it becomes startled and jots away.

>you feel an urge to shape shift into the surrounding wild life

You think to yourself if I'm going to infiltrate society I'll need to observe them first.

What do you shift into?

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>>5381390
A member of the Cold Lake First Nations.

>>5381390
Oh, and...

>what time of day is it

Night, I guess.

>>5381390
Time: Dusk
Form: Owl

Though being a moose also sounds fun lol

>>5381478
>>5381775
I don't have a corpse of the First Nation members on hand, so I have to make one. I do, however, have the opportunity to claim the body of an owl. My predatory instincts allow me to shimmy up a tree and snatch up one of the birds, crushing it in my hands. By consuming its flesh, I'm able to take its form. Teleporting is much harder, so the taste of the bird's blood is soothing. Blood in general is something I hunger for, to the point where it can overwhelm my mind.

As a member of the Old People, my original body was male, but over time I've discarded the idea of considering myself anything in particular. Rather than a desire to breed, my thoughts are consumed by the need to avenge my long-humiliated people. I am one of the few that knew the secrets of bodily immortality, and in my self-imposed stasis, I was consumed by the need to destroy my foe. The being that... Destroyed my nation, my way of life... The Beast of Destruction. It came from the sky and quenched the sun. You would know it as the KT event, or the Cretaceous-Paleogene extinction event, the one that ended the golden age of our dominance and paved the way for you disgusting mammals. More than a meteor, however... It lay waste to our great empires and forced my people to go into hiding.

The last time I killed a human being, it was a nosy hiker that awakened me from my stupor. He gave me a little bit of information on the 'modern day', after I consumed his corpse. I was informed you humans considered such acts depraved, but you also apparently draw images of sodomizing horses, so it's clear you haven't even approached our glories or omniscient perspective. Still, you've proven helpful so far, so I'll continue to take your advice.

I have the shape of an owl, outside of Alberta, this backwater nation. (Of course, everything is backwater now). It's dark, and there aren't a lot of humans out and about. I also have no idea where to find a First Nations member. I can sustain this form continuously through the consumption of wildlife, though I will require more energy than a normal owl would.

>The hiker was suicidal when he crossed me, and had crashed his car, but I have his identification. I could simply pretend to be him.
>There are locations such as 'bars' that can be counted on for quarry. Should I seek out a useless drunkard to devour?
>Perhaps I ought to feed the owl's body on mice and such, and remain patient... Despite having waited long enough.
>Do you want me to enlighten you as to the nature of the Destroyer, so you may be convinced to aid me in your quest?
>[Hammer the Keyboard with Your Clumsy Appendages]

>>5391225
>There are locations such as 'bars' that can be counted on for quarry. Should I seek out a useless drunkard to devour?

>>5391225
>There are locations such as 'bars' that can be counted on for quarry. Should I seek out a useless drunkard to devour?
Yes... this will do nicely.

>>5391238
>>5391252
>There are locations such as 'bars' that can be counted on for quarry. Should I seek out a useless drunkard to devour?
Your senses must be dull indeed, because this scent is unbearable. Even stepping into the city is a trial in self-control, to prevent from fleeing to the purity of nature.

Disgusting. Truly disgusting. When we ruled, our cities were pristine, and filled with greenery. The efforts you make to spruce up your areas are trivial in comparison. Backwards savages. The Destroyer did this, he let your rodent-turned-ape minds rampage freely without forcing you to develop over countless eons like we did. Our work was so integrated into nature it vanished into dust after we were ruined. True, this was also the work of magic, but you don't understand that either, relying on primitive concepts such as 'electricity' instead of purer energies born of the ethereal soul. It has been so long I cannot even remember all that I have forgotten, and I blame the Destroyer for crushing our cities and hurling our crown jewel of Atlantis into the deep.

Even finding prey is a hassle. Alcohol is a disease-killer, so why does it look like your dogs of the cask are even more gruesome and dirty than I could have possibly anticipated? One of them is a female, starved for the sake of attracting mates, vomiting profusely behind a tree. I want to slay her simply for the stench. Speaking of stench, a morbidly obese fellow staggers out of the bar, having forced his bloated demi-corpse out through the door. He would be comically easy to kill, though eating him would be like devouring a wedding cake that had been dropped on the ground. This last one, however, is interesting. He's sobbing to himself, sitting on a bench as he waits for a taxi to arrive. Killing such a pathetic individual would be a mercy.

>Give the pathetic one the release of death. His body will need to be lured into hiding, but can be devoured swiftly.
>Slay the woman for her contemptible behavior, and, after cleaning it, use it as your next vessel.
>The fat man... will be an easy kill. But his corpse will take hours to consume, and will be sickeningly distasteful.
>[Provide Your Inane Suggestions]
Once I have made up my mind, the act of eating and consolidating my new illusion will take time. Await my return patiently, servant-advisors.

>>5391266
>Give the pathetic one the release of death. His body will need to be lured into hiding, but can be devoured swiftly.
The feel-good story of the season!

>>5391266
>Give the pathetic one the release of death. His body will need to be lured into hiding, but can be devoured swiftly.

>>5391269
>>5391271
>Give the pathetic one the release of death. His body will need to be lured into hiding, but can be devoured swiftly.

And so he was. I snatched his primitive image-device from his claws by way of using the predatory skills of the owl, and in a hurried, unthinking panic, he chased after me. Fluttering intermittently, I kept the screen in my claws, careful not to break it, in case I had need of it. Empty-headed, but with eyes full of tears, he followed this lure. It was good that he was in a mentally blind state, as that meant I was able to draw him into an alleyway where shadows and isolation were allies to me. The resulting efforts were simple- When I killed him, he didn't even cry out due to the speed of the blow. No pain, suitable for the slaughter of a dumb animal.

I know no pity, but you might- this one had lost all of himself, besides a boring, meaningless occupation that only served to keep himself and his burden of a room-mate under a roof. I say room-mate, because they were in a relationship until as of late. Having made the man commit under the claim that the woman would provide him companionship, it had quickly spiraled into an exploitative situation where the female would take endlessly without giving more than strictly needed, using emotional manipulation to maintain the meal ticket's compliance.

This man was recently made aware of his 'girlfriend' betraying his trust for the comfort of his brother. She was convinced that no matter what, the 'spineless wimp' would never put her out in the cold so long as she subjected herself to his use from time to time. This was just the latest in a long series of trust violations, from the use of marijuana to reckless spending, and the man had contemplated killing the woman, his brother, and then himself: He had trouble gathering the courage to do so, fearing his brother would kill him and take everything while appearing to be in the right.

Unfortunately for him, I need this body alive and not in prison. So we'll have to resolve this with more finesse. This 'weed' is allegedly used for recreation and personal development. I have alchemical skill from mind-expanding experimentation- though my goals were nobler, seeking insight and not pleasure. I am also aware from his memories that the apartment is in his name only, not the woman's. Her attempts to dodge responsibility shall be her downfall, I think. It is also telling that the 'fault' for her betrayal is on him, for not preventing it. I suppose that would encourage this brat behavior of hers.

>Simply evict her. This body used to belong to a fool, but it's mine now, and I have an excuse to act 'out of character'.
>I shall tamper with her 'stash' of marijuana and show her horrors she cannot handle.
>Cancel all of his accounts and change locations. Who cares about her?
>Confront the brother, devour him, and blame the cuckold's disappearance on a suicide. This is risky, as it puts my new body under investigation.
>[Bore Me]

>>5391862
>Simply evict her. This body used to belong to a fool, but it's mine now, and I have an excuse to act 'out of character'.

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>>5395583
>Simply evict her. This body used to belong to a fool, but it's mine now, and I have an excuse to act 'out of character'.
I am not inebriated, despite possessing a formerly inebriated body, due to my mastery of shapeshifting. Still, I have the opportunity to take the fool's car home and play the part of
a quietly furious drunk. His car is clean enough, and relatively new. A sedan. He's a simple, productive member of society, or he would be if he didn't lack a will. He's got a job as a manager for a hastily-prepared dining facility. I learn more the more information I digest from his hollow head. For instance, this is Grande Prarie, whatever that means.

The female is consuming inordinate amounts of marijuana when I enter the apartment. The resultant clouds distract me given their odor. I have different senses
than humans, so this might be something like being buried in perfume to your lot. It doesn't disorient me in the slightest, but it is irritating, so I take the item she's drawing
breath from and put out the flame in it, in order to get her attention. Initially, she continues gesturing into thin air as if I had not taken the blunt, but soon slowly comes to realize it's no longer in her hand. She's a little more shocked when I put it out with my hand. Ah. Even though it's not more than an annoyance as a shapeshifter, that's not something a human would normally do. Thankfully, my vessel is 'drunk', so I have that as an excuse.

I inform her she will no longer be residing at this location, and she does not believe me at first. I repeat myself, and she still doesn't seem to understand. What a loathsomely slow species you are. She insults my vessel's masculinity, which rolls off of me because that insult doesn't mean anything to a master of the universe. If I wished, I could breed ten thousand of you worthless apes, and end them each in turn. I walk into the dining area and she follows me, blustering with a hollow outrage. Urgh, is she still yammering? I need to begin plotting my revenge on the Destroyer, and she's received my terms- she leaves at the end of the week.

Okay, she's struck me. My blood rouses to slay her, and even in her stupor, she recognizes my fury is not to be trifled with, even hidden as it is in the body of this oaf. Note, humans, that when I am injured, expend too much energy, or blood is present, I rouse my bloodlust- options to indulge it will become more common until it is unbearable, and I must wreak havoc. When I have true control over this medium, they will be marked in red- until then, I will mark them as [Bloodlust] for your simple minds.

>Threaten to call the police. This body will read with zero blood alcohol content.
>Just ignore her. I need to focus on something other than an oversized human child.
>Force her compliance with a magical irresistible suggestion. [Rouse Bloodlust]
>I've killed two humans already, I can go for a third easily. [Bloodlust]
>[Try Not to Bother Me]

>>5395822
>Just ignore her. I need to focus on something other than an oversized human child.
Begone, thot

>>5395822
>Just ignore her. I need to focus on something other than an oversized human child.

>>5395863
>>5395987
I wipe my brow where it was split and smirk at her. Truly, eliminating her would be a mercy- and, as previously established, I know no mercy. She stares at me with a shocked expression, stunned I'm still upright. She must have hit this body fairly hard with that broom, given that it splintered. But I am not a fragile thing as you are. If I were to have my choice in inadequate simian frame, I deserve the superior physiological form (and brain) of a gorilla. Where was I? Ah, yes, evicting the she-ape.

Drawing blood- not a good idea. I could have eaten her for that, but instead I decide to ignore her. Her fear at seeing the supposedly spineless suitor walk off a split broomstick as if it was nothing is obvious. The more surprising thing is that she could generate that much force at all. Leverage must have played a part. Even as round as the broom's end was, with enough pressure, it must have compressed the skin to rupture. I lick up the blood instinctively, and it helps me feel calm. Even though it's technically my own, it's human blood, so it soothes my ills. Some shapeshifters have simple tells, but I am master enough of my own form to hibernate long enough for you to evolve.

She flees in terror. Good. I set a local fan to clear the area of distraction and smoke in equal measure, and bandage the wound. Oh no, it seems as though I've been a victim of domestic violence. Another manager will have to fill in the desperately needed spot of telling imbeciles to feed imbeciles a specific way with crudely made, fattening foods. Again, this is why I need to kill the Destroyer. You got this far along and you can't feed yourselves properly, his 'ender of the age' claim was hollow at best.

I should explain as I dispose of her personal goods. When I came from, smooth-skinned weaklings, we were at the height of all civilization, ever, of all time. And I was the greatest wizard of the greatest era. But perhaps the cosmos themselves feared our potential, for we were the victim of a rampaging beast that was, as previously described, sent from outside of Earth. An extinction event, but one we ourselves could recover from, with our infinite potential and extensive technology. But the Destroyer was immune to all of that.

There's no better way to describe it other than as 'a wolf'. A beast that heralded the awful mammalian age, the age of miniscule, worthless rats that turned into larger, even more disgusting rats (humans). It murdered us by the billions, and no magic or technology could halt it. It seemed custom-made to destroy us. And I could not forgive that. Not even given the chance to die of our own merits. But time is passing.

>I will sleep deeply and heal without disturbances. [Mitigate Bloodlust]
>I will begin preparations. There is no time to waste!
>I will recant my declaration of a sick day... and learn more about local victims.
>I will change into an owl and feed on rodents until sated. [Bloodlust]
>[Write-In]

>>5399364
>[Write-In]
I will explore the human "internet" to learn more about opportunities and threats of this age

>>5399364
>>5399476
HISSSS! Surely there will be something of value to assist us in our dark crusade...

>>5399476
>>5399753
+1 to this, by the way.

>>5399476
>>5399753

After some getting a handle on the intricacies of typing, as my vessel was somewhat of an inferior typist himself, I find myself in several internet communities. Most of this information is either unhelpful or inaccurate or both. Perfect. No one will consider my innocuous questions as anything other than one of your degenerate 'lizardkin' coming to know himself, or a conspiracy theorist. The main problem is how long I can tolerate this insanity before I need to drain one of these cattle-folk of the blood they're wasting by powering their worthless brain.

Oh, great, I've already made an internet 'friend' on a chat site. He can't even spell his own title out in full (or correctly), though that might be a limitation of the format or more likely just a 'l33t'-ism common to backwards denizens of this electronic madhouse. It's doubtful he even holds naval rank.

P01Carcosa: 50 j00'R3 4 L124rd-f3ll0W, Huh? 0N3 0F 7h3 L0N9-L057 d1N054ur 50uL2?
Cold_Blooded: Please write normally.
P01Carcosa: No need to be so finicky, sheesh.

So he can write correctly, he just chooses not to.

Cold_Blooded: I need to know if there are other people like me.
P01Carcosa: Of course there are, duh. Furries are huge. Or scalies, I guess.

Human culture is so abominable I can't even begin to process it. I can't just say "for real", either. Which means the best thing to ask about is adversaries. They might use the same channels, or they might hunt for real wizards among the fakes.

Cold_Blooded: I guess then... Are there people in the government who hunt the supernatural? Are they sanctioned?
P01Carcosa: Supernatural? You mean like aliens?
Cold_Blooded: Maybe. Or demons, I guess. I'm a big fan of those 'conspiracy theories'.
Cold_Blooded: They tend to be like real theories- well-supported, and suppressed because they're too dangerous.
P01Carcosa: Ah, persecuted on multiple fronts.

Is there really no way to transmit pain across the wire?

P01Carcosa: Have you heard of PX Penumbra?
Cold_Blooded: Is that a pharmaceutical company?
P01Carcosa: Nope, a supernatural news source.
P01Carcosa: They're really hot these days, they track all sorts of supernatural stuff the news doesn't cover.
P01Carcosa: Maybe you could use that to keep an eye on the cops.

That's convenient, but it's almost too convenient. What are the chances I come across such a helpful 'friend' so quickly? Those two questions would have stumped the average individual, and he reached out to me. On the other hand, there's no way a human could sniff me out just by username, could they?

>I will not deny a gift given freely. Perhaps it is an ally, reawakened at the same time as I was. I must learn more.
>If this is an electronic investigator baiting me into a trap, they have picked the wrong fight. I will destroy them if they spring it.
>The important part is whether or not this supposed news source is valid. I must learn what humanity knows on the Destroyer.
>[Continue to Pester Me]

>>5401406
>The important part is whether or not this supposed news source is valid. I must learn what humanity knows on the Destroyer.
Seems a bit too convenient for me--true though it may be. Let's be reasonable here.

>>5401406
>The important part is whether or not this supposed news source is valid. I must learn what humanity knows on the Destroyer.

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>>5401432
>>5401751
>>5401432
>>5401751
Whatever is hiding behind this user-name, be it an assassin-warrior of your backwards electronic age or simply an empty-headed ape, can wait. I need to know where my foe is, as quickly as possible, and you have given me a useful, if inefficient, tool for doing so. The Destroyer... Doesn't show up at first. Searching for the alien demon beast yields nothing. If it were in its true form, it would be obvious. Such power would have ruined even the most powerful machine of your time. Its claws could shred steel- no 'jet' could escape the thing's speed. What could possibly have forced it into hiding? Not humanity, for certain. Which means there's a greater power at work here.

Powering off the computer screen and stepping away, I close my eyes and open my mind to the infinite. And this makes me even angrier: Your human logic, rather than empowering your acts and making you masters of the cosmos, has only served to limit your abilities in exchange for the shelter of your precious world-tree. It's a tree that's overgrown in too many places, draining the single planet of Earth of its resources with no greater goal. Most likely, it will suck up all of the planet's nutrition and then die of starvation, crumbling to dust. But as I study it, I can see the reason why.

You are young. Very. My species rose to power over millions of years, rising slowly to prominence and only expanding from our small cities when it served our interests. You are explosive, in more than one sense. It only serves to reason that you would think as children do, that there will always be enough for you to take. Hm. But if you are able to survive so much, you will likely survive this as well... In a warped, misshapen form, but you were never well-shaped in the first place. Perhaps that will give you time enough to learn the value of patience.

Studying the world-tree further, I can see that while some parts are rotten, the hypergeometry that composes the main core is very strong. Strong enough that using magic in a way that doesn't meet the laws of this world is difficult. I can't teleport, for instance, in the middle of broad daylight, or where I would be detected as moving too far too quickly. Of course. That's why the Destroyer hasn't appeared- you've prevented something like him from moving about freely. The concept of a monster that powerful that has a biological form is 'impossible' outside of rumor, and the pressure of your horde of billions seems strong enough to weigh down the beast. In order to survive, the Destroyer would have to become a concept, or maybe a... Oh no.

P01Carcosa: Something wrong? You've been quiet for a while now.

I have but one question: Is the Destroyer...
>...taking the form of a human being, to better hide among you?
>...the progenitor of humanity? Is that who you all are? The spawn of this beast?
>...the crawling rot that consumes your world tree? Do I really have to become a 'hero' for you brats?
>[Write-In]

>>5404695
>...the crawling rot that consumes your world tree? Do I really have to become a 'hero' for you brats?

>>5404695
>>...the crawling rot that consumes your world tree? Do I really have to become a 'hero' for you brats?
This is clearly the most potentially-entertaining option

>>5404695
>...taking the form of a human being, to better hide among you?
There is one Destroyer among us.

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>>5404719
>>5404732
This is fucking bullshit! I really have to protect a world tree that rooted itself in the undignified corpse of my civilization, just to avenge myself on the fiend? You can't even shapeshift, much less teleport! You burn my ancestors to get stuck in traffic for four hours! There's a reason why I suspected you knuckle-dragging, barely bipedal nuisances of being the children of the equally braindead wolf-demon, and it's because you suck at making a world worth living in! Back in my day, even the mildest nobility would have a hundred gelded mind-stapled slaves to wait on him hand and foot, so he could bemuse himself with conquering the cosmos.
At least you've worked out on-demand food, even if payment is required. And turning on the television shows terrorists being mowed down by primitive 'fire-arms'. Delightful.
>>5404982
It's not impossible more than one of these is true. A human form would allow the idiot to go undetected. You lot seem dumb enough to let him be.

But these are untested theories. Hopefully the tests will involve a lot of hairless monkeys being turned into pulp for my amusement. The more variety the better: Big humans, small humans, male humans, female humans, anything that gives more data points and helps pay down my 'save the world' invoice. I wonder if I can find an ultra-rare blue monkey. Your search engine gives me the definition of Argyria... I now have a secondary goal, for my own continued motivation. Help me do this, and I shall perhaps gain some small measure of gratitude towards you worms. Oh, yes. My internet 'friend'.

Cold_Blooded: Pulled away for a sec. Is there an overarching 'villain' to this whole site?
P01Carcosa: That implies there's a narrative and not a real conspiracy.
Cold_Blooded: Everything is a narrative if you get down to it, and the things that aren't aren't worth repeating.
P01Carcosa: Okay, dude, just don't break kayfabe on the site. It can get you permabanned.
Cold_Blooded: What does wrestling have to do with anything?
P01Carcosa: ...You serious? Anyway, the closest thing we've got is folks like Nyarlathotep.
Cold_Blooded: The master of magic? What's he up to?
P01Carcosa: Designing horrible mind-bending atrocities, probably. Some of these places are tagged with hashtags (#) and associated with sightings.
Cold_Blooded: Perfect. I'm probably going to be doing a lot of contribution in the near future.

But until then, I will focus on finding...
>...fellow shapeshifters, local to this winter nation of Canada. Perhaps I can recruit #skinwalkers.
>...the Master of Magicians. Nyarlathotep, should he still walk the surface, is an invaluable resource, if I can convince him to speak.
>...the disappearance of several American military veterans in Massachusetts, bodies not recovered. Have their corpses been eaten?
>...acquiring a blue monkey. [Bloodlust]
>[Suggest an order for dinner- and it had better be good, peon.]

>>5406327
>...fellow shapeshifters, local to this winter nation of Canada. Perhaps I can recruit #skinwalkers.

>>5406327
Oh, and for dinner...
>Pulle pork poutine

>>5406327
>>5406551
Oh, and for dinner...
>Pulle pork poutine

>>5406327
>...fellow shapeshifters, local to this winter nation of Canada. Perhaps I can recruit #skinwalkers.

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>>5406551
>>5406554
>>5408209
So these skinwalkers... seem to target fool humans that go out into the woods alone and meddle in their affairs.

One of the newest videos shows a scene where a campfire is the focus. Suddenly, the camera turns to look at a wolf. A timber wolf, I believe they're called. Its eyes glow in the dark and firelight, causing a shocked and amazed reaction. Most humans nowadays probably don't have the sense of self-preservation needed to know that without a weapon they are not winning a fight with a wolf, and that the wolf is most likely not alone anyway. You idiots probably assume that simply being human is enough to survive in the wild, that you're suddenly going to know how to survive. I cultivated survival skills as a magician, and it was a humbling affair in the many decades before I was akin to a god.

But then the wolf stands on its hind legs, standing like a human being might. The voice behind the camera gives the appropriate amount of panic, which is to say that the resulting fumbling and screaming proves useless to determine anything more about what's going on. Ah, good, the audio changes to biting and crunching, that probably means the cameraman got caught. After about another thirty seconds, the video ends.

Well, that dumb chimp is dead. Gotta wonder who uploads these videos. Anyone in this 'modern' era probably presumes it was a special effects scene, and thus doesn't need to have a proper sense of continuity. In fact, I bet if I showed this video to someone else, the 'signs of animation' would begin showing, to help re-enforce your pathetic human order. Anything needed to maintain the façade.

Wait, are they doing what I do and eating those dumbasses before uploading the video using the victim's memories and shape? That's amazing! Definitely need to recruit one of these fellows, then. I look up the video creator's location and gather enough details to deduce his identity on multiple sites. Even common investigating comes second nature to a study of the cosmos. Unfortunately, he's in Edmonton. I went the wrong way! Still, this is good enough. Being in a smaller city lowers my profile in a different way, and I can always bail if I need to.

He's not online, but I have a name and address. I prepare to head out, but it's nearly 3 AM in this time, which I assume means my body should be asleep right now. The limitations of humanity. Hey, wait. Speaking of physiological needs, that pork should have gotten here thirty minutes ago. The delivery service declares that it's ten minutes away... and it has been for some time.

>I'm going to devour the driver for this. [Indulge Bloodlust]
>There's something afoot here. Time to play hero.
>Wait for a time of day that could be used as cover to head out to my contact. Maybe the delivery will show.
>Take the refund, abuse the 'sick day' to rest and recover. I can buy new poutine, hot.
>[It does not appear that poutine can be reheated. But you heathens would.]

>>5409550
>There's something afoot here. Time to play hero.

>>5409550
>There's something afoot here. Time to play hero.
>[It does not appear that poutine can be reheated. But you heathens would.]

>>5409550
>There's something afoot here. Time to play hero.

>>5409779
>>5409996
>>5411335
He's not that far away, so when I find him drinking in his car, I'm not exactly winded. Less than half a mile. Really. He couldn't travel half a mile in an automobile? Moreover, how is that ten minutes away? By foot? Though given the state of his automotive I wouldn't be surprised if that piece of shit really did break down and he's just decided to drink to cope. There's a liquor store nearby, but it's further away than the house I'm currently residing at, which means either he had the bottle in the car or he's really just that lazy.

Ahem. I keep forgetting myself. You humans are a bad influence. Speaking of which: The driver tells me to 'fuck off' when I approach. Trying to pretend to be courteous, I explain that my meal wasn't delivered, and the bohemian-looking fellow replies that it has and that I should once again 'fuck off'. Pressing him for an explanation, he tells me that there was a kin-fellow who took the meal on my behalf. Ah. The treacherous brother. As if it weren't enough that I was struck by the bitch.

Sure enough, he's here too. It's interesting that he had the capacity for cunning required to prepare an ambush, given his limited vocabulary and obviously low mental capacity. He begins yelling and hollering and harassing me about 'his' precious little skank (which, as I'd like to remind you, was cheating on my body with him). Urgh, how droll. It's not incoherent, but I don't care about his rambling. It doesn't help that he ate my dinner. Which calls to mind one solution to this problem- simply being eating him. But there's a witness. If I kill the brother, I might be able to get off the hook, but I'll be under additional scrutiny. If I kill them both, it'll call down a full investigation and this cover will no longer be useful, but there will be no witnesses and there's the possibility this body will be considered a victim as well. Also, I can serve as the delivery driver.

Oh, right, the brother is continuing to screech in my general direction. He might act soon. I am feeling fairly parched... And that wine smells awful. Such poor quality.

>Eat the thug. [Indulge Bloodlust]
>Eat them both. [Indulge Bloodlust]
>I am an apex predator. Under the guise of this feeble human frame, beat the thug within an inch of his life and use whatever money he has on him to engorge at a 24/7 diner.
>Use this human's memories to insult the would-be darling at length.
>Just walk away. This has been a titanic waste of my time.
>[Blah blah blah. It's almost political how much you humans can say without communicating anything useful.]

>>5412117
>Use this human's memories to insult the would-be darling at length.
>I am an apex predator. Under the guise of this feeble human frame, beat the thug within an inch of his life and use whatever money he has on him to engorge at a 24/7 diner.

>>5412117
>I am an apex predator. Under the guise of this feeble human frame, beat the thug within an inch of his life and use whatever money he has on him to engorge at a 24/7 diner.
Gimme ur lunch munny

>>5412117
>Use this human's memories to insult the would-be darling at length.
>I am an apex predator. Under the guise of this feeble human frame, beat the thug within an inch of his life and use whatever money he has on him to engorge at a 24/7 diner.

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>>5412119
>>5412190
>>5412433

Her every flaw was systemically explained at length, from her abominable hygiene to her atrocious personality. Even the delivery driver was getting offended, which meant that I was doing a good job. Her trashy tattoos, her idiotic ideas, her overused, poorly-maintained body... After I mentioned that she's incontinent for reasons that should be clear to any man, his already limited mind is too consumed by rage to listen further.

The brother grabbed a piece of nearby rebar and smashed it over my head. Doesn't anyone in this day and age have respect for their own blood? That skull-rattling blow was followed up by a swing to the legs, from where he began pummeling my frame. I had to bite him to get him off of me, which is never a good place to be in, especially with as hungry and as angry as I was. Of course, after I let my instincts take command, he was soon whimpering in a pool of his own blood, a suitable outcome for a would-be murderer. Stupid sod can give but not take.

I arrived at the nearest 24/7 diner head held high. The waitress asked if I was all right, and I stated that I was feeling better than ever, and not to worry about the limp. It's always trouble when people mistake the superficial damage of the body for real damage.

Ah, the resulting feast helped me repair the leg. Every kind of pork they had on hand, including the previously denied poutine, as well as a dozen boiled eggs. Bacon, sausage, ham steak, pulled pork, sausage gravy... about four pounds of the stuff. I explained it away as being on an empty stomach and exhausted from a long week of work, and the waitress, easily persuaded as many of your people are, backed away with an empty expression suitable for her lack of intelligence before hurrying away as a servant should.

A heavy-bodied cook came out to provide me the bill, and I acquiesced, using the brother's card for my purchase. One suspicious look and an approved purchase later, he left me be. I noticed there was a service charge on the bill. When I asked about it, he pointed to the blood I tracked in. Well, it's not my money, anyway.

Back at my apartment- it's a nice place to shower, bandage, rest and digest this meal. Falling asleep was easy. Waking up to hear the buzzing of complaining texts, I ensured it's only lesser workers pleading for additional help before going back to sleep. That they struggle to keep up is not my issue, especially given that this body has been beaten twice within the last 24 hours. Well, three times, if you include me taking it. Hm, what to do... I have the rest of the afternoon after waking up at about noon.

>Time for me to scout out that lead from before. Edmonton, was it?
>The Internet is my friend, and I shall exploit it.
>This apartment is rank and out of order. I will make this a suitable sorcerer's den.
>These events have raised my profile. I must be more cautious, and limit my movement for now.
>[You Fellows Have Proven Quite Helpful After All]

>>5415040
>Time for me to scout out that lead from before. Edmonton, was it?
Vigilance is key... and fear shall be our ally!

>>5415040
>Time for me to scout out that lead from before. Edmonton, was it?

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>>5415566
>>5415591
Edmonton is quite a ways away- almost five hours. It occurs to me that I spent a lot of time traveling that I simply should not have. Nonetheless, I am here now. Perhaps I could have my body's work transferred to this location. One of the things my mind takes note of is the Cree First Nation here. They will likely have a better awareness of the skinwalkers than the overly technological government of Canada. But perhaps not. Magicians are often as easy to fool as the mundane, especially since they think they are more keen than they are. And there's no telling how many of the Cree actually have thaumaturgical study as opposed to simply getting by as other humans do. It's not as if they're all huddled around magical circles or speaking to spirits.

I was stopped by a Mounted Policeman, but luckily it wasn't for the violence I perpetrated. It was for the exhaust of my car, of all things. The Quebecois imbecile insisted that I needed to replace the catalytic converter. I have no idea what that is, but how should I know how human machines work when none of you seem to? It was also somewhat concerning to me that he had crossed the continent for work, but he says it's standard in his line of employment. Making small talk pains me, and this was even worse given his heavy accent. Also, this car is only twenty years old and has a little over three hundred thousand kilometers on it. Any machine made at this level of development should have at least twice as much left in it. My memories contradict me, but he's even less knowledgeable about machines than I am, so I'm ignoring him. He probably just wanted a new car.

More importantly, I track down the individual in question through a mixture of mysticism and technology. Having translated my profile onto this body's mobile phone for accessibility, I have a list of the subject user's history. Combining that that with my natural hunter's instinct, I was able to track this fellow down to a local store. He's picking between shades of bell pepper when I come across him. An Asian Canadian, or would be, if he wasn't a skinwalker wearing the shade of his victim. Despite this, even an adept shapeshifter has some tells that indicate they're not comfortable with a specific kind of body. Minor weight changes or ethnic differences can throw off someone who isn't a master like I am, and even I have had a long enough time in my own frame to find new shapes unseemly, especially monkey shapes.

Whether he's originally from the west side of the Pacific or not, he seems to gauge that I'm not what I seem either. The ball is in my court, so to speak.

>I ought to treat him as if he were the individual that had made his film, to keep up appearances.
>There's no one else around. I'm going to drop the pretenses, for the sake of speed.
>Simply shop as well. I require sustenance, and it will make him feel more at ease.
>All I need to do to learn who he is is eat him, so I ought to.
>[I Seem to Have Made You Wait]

(Also note that this will most likely be the last open question of this thread before the thread is archived. If I don't post a reply before then, it means that the result will be next thread's OP.)

>>5419280
>I ought to treat him as if he were the individual that had made his film, to keep up appearances.
>Simply shop as well. I require sustenance, and it will make him feel more at ease.

>>5419280
>I ought to treat him as if he were the individual that had made his film, to keep up appearances

>>5419288
Thanks for running, and keep up the good work!