File: rematching the face.jpg (133 KB, 800x600)

133 KB JPG

"Give it up, Starcrash! We know you've got the Solenian queen aboard! This is your last warning - land on that planet now, or we destroy your ship."

File: steering committee.jpg (123 KB, 800x600)

123 KB JPG

[frantic beeping noises]

"They're not letting up!"

"He's probably still mad from losing his crew the last time we fought!"

"I thought I could shake them in this Duplonic cloud, but they're right on our tail!"

[imminent-sounding beeping noise]

"They're firing again!"

File: green means whoa.jpg (155 KB, 800x600)

155 KB JPG

"If they hit one of our grav engines, it might ignite the whole-"

SHABLOOOOoooooooOOOOOOOOOM

File: Flash Boardin'.jpg (121 KB, 800x600)

121 KB JPG

"What was that?"

"Hey, Jake! You alright?"

"Yaaah! There's a Sporc aboard! Lorien! Nomi!"

"What happened to your hair?"

"Stowaways!"

File: decisive inaction.jpg (118 KB, 800x600)

118 KB JPG

"Maybe it's something to do with that universal resonance!"

"Don't tell me you still believe that junk!"

"Did you notice those pirates stopped shooting at us?"

File: nuts and jolts.jpg (140 KB, 800x600)

140 KB JPG

"Calm down, Jake!"

"Yaaah! Who are you people? How did you get on board? What did you do with Prim and Krum?"

"Jake! You know who I am! It's me, Lo! We've been flying together for three years! You took quite a nasty shock from that panel just now, but you're alright."

"Not Jake."

"What do you mean?"

"Not Jake. Different vacsuit."

"Say, Nomi's right! That vacsuit's brand new! You aren't Jake! Who are you? Some kind of imposter?"

[urgent-sounding beeping noise begins]

File: blue's clueless.jpg (137 KB, 800x600)

137 KB JPG

"What is it?"

"Unknown craft. Military model? Charging weapon!"

"How'd it get that close without our instruments picking it up?"

"Don't know."

"It couldn't have simply appeared out of nowhere!"

[additional, neutral-sounding beeping noise]

"Hailing us!"

File: following through with hi(...).jpg (112 KB, 800x600)

112 KB JPG

"Thought you could hide from us, Starcrash? I told you what would happen if you didn't land!"

>Look around for a planet
>Try to flee from the pirates
>Stall for time
>Something else

Roll a d12 and link to this post for whatever you do, please! To roll, put dice+1d12 in the Options field!

Rolled 6 (1d12)

>>5208938
>>Stall for time

Rolled 7 (1d12)

>>5208938
Fly right into them. They'll never see it coming!

>>5208938
>Look around for a planet
The ole' switcharoo, huh? Let's put some space between these guys!

Rolled 10 (1d12)

>>5208979
Aaaand I forgot my roll. That's ominous.

File: trust authentication netw(...).jpg (130 KB, 800x600)

130 KB JPG

"If only the real Jake was here!"

"I am the real Jake!"

"Not captain."

"Look... whoever you people are... just trust me, alright? I have a plan."

"It seems we haven't much to lose. Very well."

File: tape delay.jpg (139 KB, 800x600)

139 KB JPG

"Cease fire! We will comply... the following coordinates..."

[static]

File: setup charges.jpg (127 KB, 800x600)

127 KB JPG

"What happened?"

"What'd he say?"

"Quiet! I'm trying to regain the signal!"

File: flip the script.jpg (119 KB, 800x600)

119 KB JPG

"What now?"

"Now while they're distracted, we do THIS!"

VRRRRRRRRRMMMMMMMMMMM

File: ram charger.jpg (124 KB, 800x600)

124 KB JPG

[beeping noise]

"They're gonna ram us!"

"Look out!"

"Wait, their trajectory-"

File: pointing the miss.jpg (130 KB, 800x600)

130 KB JPG

VVVVVRRRRRRRMMMMMMMMMmmmmmmmmmmmm

"They missed us!"

"They weren't aiming at us, fool! They did that to buy themselves a lead!"

File: fast friends.jpg (109 KB, 800x600)

109 KB JPG

"Now, Jake, or whoever you are-"

"I'm telling you, I'm really Jake Starcrash! It's you two who don't belong!"

"Our cabins."

"Whatever your name is, I hope there's more to your plan!"

File: landing parley.jpg (122 KB, 800x600)

122 KB JPG

"Take a look. There's an uncharted planet in this sector with a dense rocky core."

"Hmmm... not a very pleasant-sounding world."

"Maybe not, but that atmosphere might hide the Zephyr from their sensors until we could get them to land and out of that gunship they're flying."

"You said it had a rocky core. Would it be possible to position ourselves with the planet between us and them, then make our escape?"

"Yeah, I suppose... the calculations would have to be perfect, though. Any error and they'd spot us."

>Land on the planet
>Try to sneak away
>Something else

Roll a d12 and link to this post for whatever you do, please! To roll, put dice+1d12 in the Options field!

Rolled 3 (1d12)

>>5209023
>>Try to sneak away

Rolled 12 (1d12)

>>5209023
>Land on the planet
Explore. Let's see some lego wilderness.

What happened in here? Did Jakes from parallel universes get swapped, or...

>>5209076
Two 12s in a row. Nice.

File: commander in chiffron.jpg (135 KB, 800x600)

135 KB JPG

"There's no time for that! Get us out of here!"

"I really think we should head for that planet-"

"You're not the captain! In his absence, I order you to plot an escape vector!"

"Do it!"

File: hunting party.jpg (130 KB, 800x600)

130 KB JPG

"They're getting away!"

"They can't outrun this!"

File: knocking back a few.jpg (137 KB, 800x600)

137 KB JPG

KDROOOM

KDROOOM

"Aiiiii!"

"They're shooting at us!"

"Why does someone always have to point that out?"

File: one too many.jpg (136 KB, 800x600)

136 KB JPG

[very rapid beeping noise]

"Ion leak! Almost ruptured!"

"That's it, we're going with my plan instead!"

"If we die, at least I have the comfort of knowing that's what the real Jake would say!"

File: ring loss.jpg (152 KB, 800x600)

152 KB JPG

VRRRRRRRMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

"I told you, I am the real Jake!"

File: high-tension line.jpg (131 KB, 800x600)

131 KB JPG

[impotent-sounding beeping noise]

"Where'd they go?"

"You promised us a queen's ransom!"

"Quiet, both of you! It's this damned cloud!"

File: finding common ground.jpg (119 KB, 800x600)

119 KB JPG

"Right there. Level surface."

"Yeah, that looks just about perfect..."

File: semi-dry dock.jpg (122 KB, 800x600)

122 KB JPG

PSSSSSHHHHHHHHHHOOOOOMMPPP

File: order of operations.jpg (114 KB, 800x600)

114 KB JPG

[engine noises lower in pitch]

"Seems like we lost them. As long as we don't put out too much energy, they'll have to comb the whole planet with a visual search."

"Alright, now it's time for you to answer some questions. How did you get aboard the Zephyr?"

"Where's Jake?"

"How did those pirates get so close without-"

"Hold it! Both of you! Now listen, first things first..."

>Find out more about these people
>Explore the uncharted planet
>Start working on a way to return
>Something else

Roll a d12 and link to this post for whatever you do, please! To roll, put dice+1d12 in the Options field!

Rolled 9 (1d12)

>>5209521
>>Find out more about these people

Rolled 8 (1d12)

>>5209521
>Find out more about these people
>Attempt to contact our green duck friend through the Universal Resonance for an explanation on what just happened

File: get a kung-fu grip.jpg (133 KB, 800x600)

133 KB JPG

"I'm the real Jake Starcrash, and I can prove it. This is my cabin, right?"

"Jake's cabin."

"Look, that's not... I'll prove I belong here. Hanging inside are an Octan calendar and some-"

PSSSSHHHHHH

"Huh? An instructional space-jitsu calendar?"

"Jake's favorite."

File: piling on the evidence.jpg (147 KB, 800x600)

147 KB JPG

"Uh... Krum must have been playing a joke on me. Look, see? This is Krum's cabin, where he keeps his religious stuff and all his weapons. I bet he's got my things stashed right-"

KLANK

KLANG

KLONG

KLINK

"My cabin! That's private!"

[metal clanking noises continue]

File: universal entertaining.jpg (127 KB, 800x600)

127 KB JPG

"Alright, something is definitely strange here. Hang on, I'm going to try and focus my mind to the universal resonance."

"The what?"

"You know, the universal resonance. The-"

"Jake never mentioned anything about any... universal whatever."

"He's crazy."

File: riddle of rubber.jpg (102 KB, 800x600)

102 KB JPG

"Finally, a familiar face! What's going on? Am I going nuts?"

"Something is interfering with my ability to perceive your path. You must gather yourselves."

"Wait, what? What do you m-"

File: restating the head case.jpg (137 KB, 800x600)

137 KB JPG

"Are you unwell?"

"Huh?"

"For a moment you looked like you were about to-"

"I'm fine. At least I know I'm not insane."

"We don't."

"Right. I don't blame either of you for thinking I'm crazy. This is going to sound far-fetched, but I'm not the Jake you know."

"Yes, we already know that."

"No, I mean... my name is Jake Starcrash, and I'm the captain of a spaceship called the Zephyr, but my crew is a Sporc named Krum and a Streifen named Primrose. Does any of that sound familiar?"

"A Streifen?"

"I think Jake would have told us if he'd ever had a Sporc as part of his crew."

"Look, the duck said something about gathering ourselves..."

"What duck? What are you talking about?"

"He's... a little green duck, he lives in another realm. I visit him by going into a trance and leaving my corporeal form."

"Told you."

File: grand opening.jpg (132 KB, 800x600)

132 KB JPG

"This is getting us nowhere... let's start from the beginning. You already know who I am. Sort of. Who are you?"

"If you're some kind of spy, you're the worst-informed one I've ever had the privilege of meeting."

"I'm not- look, you said your name is Lo?"

"I am Grand Duke of the Twin Moons, Eternal Regent Lorien the Nineteenth, fifth heir to the throne of Kelvaris, son of the King of Three Hundred Stars and Keeper of-"

"Long title."

"How'd you end up on the Zephyr?"

"My older brothers, and the children of my father's concubines, would rather I wasn't around to take the throne if the circumstances favored it. Jake... that is, our Jake, finds my wit a pleasant substitute for flatbacks."

"They use flatbacks here?"

"Of course! That and Octan scrip. It's a good idea to have both on hand."

File: small talk.jpg (128 KB, 800x600)

128 KB JPG

"What about you? Lorien called you Nomi?"

"My name. You're lost?"

"You can say that again. How long have you been aboard the Zephyr?"

"Two years. Engine blew. Traded passage. Rare part. Had three."

File: switching hour.jpg (136 KB, 800x600)

136 KB JPG

"We can't just stand here swapping histories forever! We need to figure out how to return our Jake to us, and send you back to wherever it is you come from!"

"Lo's right."

"Yeah, I'm going to..."

>Start researching the problem yourself
>Try to contact Primrose and collaborate
>Explore the uncharted planet for clues
>Something else

Roll a d12 and link to this post for whatever you do, please! To roll, put dice+1d12 in the Options field!

Rolled 6 (1d12)

>>5209696
>Start researching the problem yourself
See if we can call up dad and double check if he and mom are sure we're not a twin.

Rolled 6 (1d12)

>>5209696
>Explore the uncharted planet for clues
the fox's cool

Rolled 4 (1d12)

>>5209696
>>Explore the uncharted planet for clues

File: friendly firing squad.jpg (138 KB, 800x600)

138 KB JPG

"...head outside and look around. You're welcome to join me."

"Can't you simply use your magical powers to solve the problem?"

"I've been trying to contact anyone... Prim... my father... it's getting harder and harder to focus on the universal resonance. Something about being here is throwing me off."

"Then what are we supposed to do? We can't just wait out the pirates and hope they go away. The Zephyr's foodmat hasn't been refilled in over six months!"

"We're not going to figure out anything from here. Maybe there are some people on this planet who can help us. After all, we still have to deal with that ion leak. Do you have burners or transcoders in this universe?"

"Of course we do. However, you will not be carrying a burner. Please understand, we still can't trust you."

"I'm not going out there unarmed."

"I'll go with you."

"Me too."

"After all, we have as much interest in getting our Jake back as you do of getting back to your universe."

"I guess that's about as good a deal as I'm going to find in this place."

File: they have the foggiest idea.jpg (112 KB, 800x600)

112 KB JPG

"The ship's sensors detected some kind of energy signature about two klicks south of here. Might be a settlement. This atmo makes it hard to tell anything long-range."

"No sounds."

"The atmo might be muffling sound too. Alright, let's go. Stay within sight of each other."

"Relax, we're professionals!"

File: source corrode.jpg (110 KB, 800x600)

110 KB JPG

"That must be the source of the energy reading."

"It looks like some kind of ancient ruin."

"Doesn't look like there's anyone living here anymore."

"Same frequency."

"Huh? Same frequency as what?"

"Duplonic cloud."

File: forming connections.jpg (112 KB, 800x600)

112 KB JPG

"Interesting... we were in a fight with those pirates inside the Duplonic cloud in my universe when the accident ha-"

SHABLOOOOoooooooOOOOOOOOOM

File: at a loss for wards.jpg (114 KB, 800x600)

114 KB JPG

"Jake? Other Jake! Where are you? He just vanished!"

"No replacement!"

"You're right! If he disappeared, and we didn't get our Jake back..."

File: enterprise appraise.jpg (150 KB, 800x600)

150 KB JPG

"...then where did this Jake end up?"

"Captain on deck!

"Huh? Wh... where am I?"

File: the chain of command will(...).jpg (167 KB, 800x600)

167 KB JPG

"Captain... on deck?"

"Hey, this is my personal ship, not yours."

"Dahling, you said you were taking me to the commissary!"

"Seems like my side trip to the bridge was worth it. Guards, arrest this man."

"Wait!"

File: sprawling it out in duplicate.jpg (140 KB, 800x600)

140 KB JPG

"You don't understand, I'm not a spy!"

"Not a very good one, anyway. You're not supposed to be in the same room as the person you're trying to imitate."

"I'm Jake Starcrash! Just not the one from your universe!"

"If you were Jake Starcrash, you'd be on the other side of these bars, with a beautiful woman on your arm. Come on, Satina."

"Wait!"

File: drunk tank.jpg (137 KB, 800x600)

137 KB JPG

"Great, this couldn't get any-"

"You! 'bout time they threw you in here, Starcrash! You *hic* you can serve the Empire better from the brig than from th' bridge!"

[drunken laughter]

"I'll teach you t' write me up for insubordin *hic*"

Roll a d12 and link to this post for whatever you do, please! To roll, put dice+1d12 in the Options field!

Rolled 3 (1d12)

>>5210954
Punch him in the nuts for double insubordination

>>5210954

Practice your fisticuffs on the insolent fool!

Rolled 11 (1d12)

>>5211112

And rollin'

Rolled 3 (1d12)

>>5210951
>>5210952
damn what an insolent twat

>>5210954
Dismantle this chud and get his gun, if he has one.

File: shot across the brow.jpg (133 KB, 800x600)

133 KB JPG

"Look, I'm not the guy you're mad at!"

"I've been wantin' t'do this for a year!"

WHAAMP

"Aaaugh-!"

File: second volley.jpg (137 KB, 800x600)

137 KB JPG

"An' this is for callin' me *hic* a danger to the other crew!"

WHUD

"Aaauuf-!"

File: sinking feeling.jpg (136 KB, 800x600)

136 KB JPG

"I'm starting to like this other Jake!"

WHAMD

"Aaauk-!"

File: bar exam.jpg (114 KB, 800x600)

114 KB JPG

"Uniform looks like it's made of acrylonitrile fabric. I wonder if I can wad it up and use it to jam up a bar long enough to cause an overheat. Maybe-"

"Is what you say true, that you are from another universe?"

"You!"

File: laser focus.jpg (115 KB, 800x600)

115 KB JPG

"Yes, it's true. This is the third universe I've been through today. Can you help me get out of this cell?"

"I have the dreams."

"Huh?"

File: dream waiver.jpg (117 KB, 800x600)

117 KB JPG

"The Captain, he has used the universal resonance to rise high in the ranks of the Empire."

"He knows about the universal resonance?"

"He uses it for many things, but I have the dreams. He says they are inconsequential because he does not share them."

"What dreams?"

"In them, I see a man who is like my Jake, but not. He is not you, but seeing you makes me think that he is not just a dream."

File: caught in the pact.jpg (133 KB, 800x600)

133 KB JPG

"Can you help me escape?"

"Of course, but why should I? If even I am caught here, the Captain himself will be unable to-"

[approaching bootsteps]

"Oh, no! The guard!"

>Try to lure the guard into the cell
>Hope Satina can take care of herself
>Something else

Roll a d12 and link to this post for whatever you do, please! To roll, put dice+1d12 in the Options field!

Rolled 4 (1d12)

>>5212112
>>Try to lure the guard into the cell

>>5212112
>Try to lure the guard into the cell

Rolled 9 (1d12)

>>5212198

Rolled 1 (1d12)

>>5212112
>Try to lure the guard into the cell

>>5212418
uhh

Rolled 10 (1d12)

>>5212606
>>5212418

Rollin' to avert disaster!

(Also luring the guard into the cell)

File: guard post.jpg (118 KB, 800x600)

118 KB JPG

"Over there! Hold it, you!"

File: two for one tail.jpg (134 KB, 800x600)

134 KB JPG

"If it isn't the Captain's favorite plaything. What are you doing down here in the brig? Even you know that's off-limits."

"I do not have to answer to you."

"She has quite a mouth!"

"Yeah, I can see why the Captain likes it."

File: caged fighter.jpg (118 KB, 800x600)

118 KB JPG

[faint energy crackling noise]

"You wouldn't be saying that if these bars were off."

"No?"

File: open combat.jpg (130 KB, 800x600)

130 KB JPG

[energy crackling ceases]

"That's more like it. Now fight me like a man!"

"You're not a man. You're just something to be cleaned up."

File: burn.jpg (119 KB, 800x600)

119 KB JPG

FRRRRRRZZZZZZAAAAAAAAP

"Aaaaugh-!"

File: two down.jpg (135 KB, 800x600)

135 KB JPG

"The Captain won't mind us taking care of an undesirable like you."

"He might even reward us for doing s-"

File: two to gone.jpg (119 KB, 800x600)

119 KB JPG

THUMP

THUD

File: prop plainly stated.jpg (121 KB, 800x600)

121 KB JPG

"How... did you..."

"I am not wholly defenseless. Lie still. You have been wounded."

>Try to find medical aid
>Try to get off the ship
>Try to find the Captain
>Something else

Roll a d12 and link to this post for whatever you do, please! To roll, put dice+1d12 in the Options field!

Rolled 12 (1d12)

>>5214364

Get a quick patch up (if able), and then get off the ship ASAP.

>>5214364
>Try to find medical aid
>Snag a burner off of one of the mooks

Rolled 8 (1d12)

>>5214442

File: injection sight.jpg (123 KB, 800x600)

123 KB JPG

"This will hurt at first."

"Wait, where did you get that? What is it-"

"This is not a poison. It is very precious. It is the only one I have ever owned. Do not move."

File: rocky start.jpg (131 KB, 800x600)

131 KB JPG

[pained grunt]

"Well?"

"I feel... I feel like I never got shot. Feels more like a punch."

"It is working. We must flee before we are discovered. Now you will tell me how you arrived here."

"A planet... inside a Duplonic cloud. Rocky core, water, tall rocky formations all across the landscape. No life as far as we could tell, but there was an energy source. It was some kind of ruin. It matched the energy signature of the Duplonic cloud."

"We passed such a planet less than a day ago."

"You're sure?"

"This ship is still inside the cloud."

File: burner prone.jpg (123 KB, 800x600)

123 KB JPG

"I need to get to that planet. Is there some kind of smaller ship that I can escape on?"

"The launch bays are too distant. We must use the ship's transportal to reach the planet."

"We?"

"I will see this planet. Perhaps the dreams will become real. If not, I will say that you poisoned those men while you held me against my will. With them dead, my punishment will be slight."

"Alright, let's go."

File: day one elusive.jpg (123 KB, 800x600)

123 KB JPG

[indistinct conversation]

File: technical issue.jpg (128 KB, 800x600)

128 KB JPG

"What is this? Some kind of drop pod?"

"The transportal will scan us while it disintegrates our clothing and bodies. Both will be reconstructed at the atomic level using the planet's atmosphere and soil as fodder. Finally, our new brains will be electrified using the patterns held from our original brains."

"Hold on, are you ser-"

File: arrival timing.jpg (74 KB, 800x600)

74 KB JPG

"-ious?"

File: mission objective.jpg (100 KB, 800x600)

100 KB JPG

"That ruin! It's exactly the same as the one in the other uni-"

"Aiiiiiiiii!"

File: foggy notion.jpg (118 KB, 800x600)

118 KB JPG

"Aiiiiiiiiiiiii!"

Roll a d12 and link to this post for whatever you do, please! To roll, put dice+1d12 in the Options field!

Rolled 2 (1d12)

>>5214488

Fire your looted burner at that Thing!

Rolled 6 (1d12)

>>5214488
Slap its silly noodles.

Rolled 10 (1d12)

>>5214488
Use our brain powers to convince it to leave.

Rolled 5 (1d12)

>>5214488
>Pull the royal pussy back and blast the body horror with our borrowed burner

this is my favorite enemy now

Rolled 2 (1d12)

>>5208922
quadruple eye poke!

File: aim high.jpg (90 KB, 800x600)

90 KB JPG

"Satina! Get behind me!"

"Aiiiiii!"

"Chew on this, you ugly-"

File: burn out.jpg (87 KB, 800x600)

87 KB JPG

THWUCK

"My burner!"

File: opening remarks.jpg (111 KB, 800x600)

111 KB JPG

"Aiiiiii!"

"Hang on, I'm going to try and communicate with it using my-"

Do not fear me! I will not harm you!

File: winding down the clock.jpg (85 KB, 800x600)

85 KB JPG

"You're intelligent?"

My race constructed the temporal axis more than four hundred billion years ago. It has enabled this planet to remain intact through the contractions and reformations of its universe.

"Looks like it's seen better days."

You are correct. Its power is waning. When this universe ends, my planet will finally end alongside it.

File: time to visit or clocking out.jpg (102 KB, 800x600)

102 KB JPG

"Can it take me back to my own reality?"

Yes. However, I cannot allow you to return to your original path.

"What?"

There is another like you. He has discovered the temporal axis as it exists on his path. In its original state he would have been unable to make use of its power, but it has grown weak enough for him to manipulate. Further crossings weaken the axis.

"You mean-"

You must remain here, in this place.

>Try to convince the alien to help you
>Slap the crystal and hope for the best
>Something else

Roll a d12 and link to this post for whatever you do, please! To roll, put dice+1d12 in the Options field!

Rolled 10 (1d12)

>>5215446
"What if we find this guy who's manipulating it and get him to stop somehow?"

File: motor oil salesman.jpg (102 KB, 800x600)

102 KB JPG

"Seems like you've got an engine fire on your hands."

What do you mean?

"This other Jake sounds like he's making the problem worse. You won't be able to tamp it down by sitting around here in the fog."

You would oppose him?

"If you help me use the axis to get to him, I'll do my best to stop him from causing any more damage."

Further weakening is unacceptable. I cannot allow you to exacerbate the problem.

"All I want is to get back to my own reality. Once I do that, I'll never set foot on this planet again, in any universe. Can you say the same about this other Jake?"

File: startup company.jpg (110 KB, 800x600)

110 KB JPG

Your proposal is acceptable. I have realigned the axis. It will direct you toward his path.

"Alright. Let me grab my burner and I'll be on my-"

Your weapon must remain here. Only the minimal amount of material must cross between paths.

"If that's what I have to do to get you to help me, I guess I have no other choice."

File: paying the farewell.jpg (101 KB, 800x600)

101 KB JPG

"Well, Satina, I hope you get back to your ship in one piece. Maybe this guy will give you a lift, or at least a comm."

"I will find my own way."

"Wish me luck!"

File: free ride.jpg (101 KB, 800x600)

101 KB JPG

"Satina! What are you-"

SHABLOOOOoooooooOOOOOOOOOM

File: cramping for the test.jpg (114 KB, 800x600)

114 KB JPG

"What were you thinking? You have no idea where we are! Who knows what kind of danger we could be in?"

"I will see if the dreams are real. Do you have any idea where we are?"

"No, I-"

File: noise solution.jpg (110 KB, 800x600)

110 KB JPG

[background spaceship noises]

"Wait a minute. I recognize this engine."

"Yes?"

"This is..."

File: meeting the enemy head-on.jpg (116 KB, 800x600)

116 KB JPG

[whispering]

"...the Dragon!"

"Come on, you two! Let's kick jets before this cloud gives us any more trouble. The Space Police have gotta be long gone by now."

File: back in black.jpg (91 KB, 800x600)

91 KB JPG

"Clamp ya hoses, Kristobar! We're comin'!"

"I told you I had a bad feeling about this sector!"

[whispering]

"Is that the Jake you dreamed about?"

"No. This is your universe?"

"No, but I'm willing to bet my share that somewhere in that Duplonic cloud is a planet just like the one we came from. We need to get there somehow."

Roll a d12 and link to this post for whatever you do, please! To roll, put dice+1d12 in the Options field!

>>5215672
>Pull the Engine hatch off and get inside
if that's impossible:
>Gut the engine and construct a makeshift weapon

Rolled 5 (1d12)

>>5215955
adding the doice

File: panel discussion.jpg (105 KB, 800x600)

105 KB JPG

"Who is this Kristobar?"

"Kristobar Delaran. He's bad news, at least in my universe. Maybe there's an access panel behind this mirror... no, looks like it's fixed."

File: sanitation engineer.jpg (112 KB, 800x600)

112 KB JPG

"I wonder if I could cannibalize the toilet valve, make some kind of-"

KLUMP

"Careful!"

File: hearing double.jpg (118 KB, 800x600)

118 KB JPG

"Huh? That sounded like it came from the head..."

File: double check.jpg (115 KB, 800x600)

115 KB JPG

[burner drawing noise]

"Hello? Anybody in there?"

Roll a d12 and link to this post for whatever you do, please! To roll, put dice+1d12 in the Options field!

Rolled 11 (1d12)

>>5216310
The toilet starts backing up, distracting Kristobar Jake.

Rolled 10 (1d12)

>>5216310
>The door to their armory suddenly explodes and a heavily-armed Jake from another universe walks in

File: plumb out of luck.jpg (107 KB, 800x600)

107 KB JPG

KLUMPA-KLUMPA-KLUMPA-KLUMPA

[stage whispering]

"What did you do?"

"I didn't do anything!

File: janitorial stage.jpg (112 KB, 800x600)

112 KB JPG

"What's the matter, Starcrash?"

"Aw, it's that toilet valve again!"

"Take care of it, will ya?"

File: flash photography.jpg (124 KB, 800x600)

124 KB JPG

"Yeah, sure, I'll put it on my-"

SHABLOOOOoooooooOOOOOOOOOM

"Yaaaah-!"

"Aaaiii!"

"Controls are dead! Someone else is flyin' the Dragon!"

File: green thumbs and itchy tr(...).jpg (134 KB, 800x600)

134 KB JPG

[burner drawing noises]

"Hey, what the-"

"Occupants secured!"

"Jake!"

File: not much restroom to maneuver.jpg (118 KB, 800x600)

118 KB JPG

[door opening noise]

"I apologize for dropping in on short notice..."

File: bad hair day.jpg (103 KB, 800x600)

103 KB JPG

"...but I love being able to greet myself in person."

[unknown female voice on overhead speaker]

"Transit complete."

"Great, we're back home already. When I saw the axis realigning, I knew I'd be having company soon. Come on, let me show you around. Don't worry about your companion. She'll be cared for."

File: electric bill.jpg (120 KB, 800x600)

120 KB JPG

"I'm putting together something big here. I'm willing to cut you both in on this. In deference to our shared chronological lineage."

"Wait a second, is that Alpha-8000?"

File: demographic novel.jpg (143 KB, 800x600)

143 KB JPG

"The people who built it named it the Alpha-8K, but I'm sure you're thinking of something similar. I fished it out of a landslide just a few paths down from this one and repaired it with some components another Jake introduced me to. It's been a big help in deciphering the temporal axis."

"If it's anything like the Alpha I know, you can't trust it!"

"Don't sweat it, Jake! You do go by Jake, right? Most of us do. Listen, that computer's been gelded. You've got nothing to worry about. It serves me now, like it was meant to."

"Hey, what's that you said about cutting us in?"

"Now this is a guy I can do business with! I can tell you both perceive the deep universal resonance."

"Universal what?"

"You ever feel like you knew something was gonna happen before it happened?"

"Sure, all the time! Geri and Kristobar both think I'm crazy!"

"Well, you're not crazy. Your talent is what I need."

"And what, we help you take over an empire and you make us rulers of our own worlds?"

"Jake, I'm offering you more than a world. I'm offering you an entire universe. With the power of the temporal axis we can become gods. We can open up realities where everything is exactly like we like it, live there forever, leave or change it whenever we like. You want to keep pushing ions for the rest of your days? Sitting in transit on a rusting ship counting cargo and checking logs, watching the same old tapes? You like Celats? You can have a whole population of them, bred to your taste. You don't want to be immortal, you can grow old and fat in comfort. All you have to do is help me, or stay out of my way."

File: tail end of the conversation.jpg (150 KB, 800x600)

150 KB JPG

"The Chronitan must have realigned the axis to send you in my direction. Am I right?"

"You mean that four-eyed alien?"

"Warlord Starcrash, forgive my interruption-"

"Warlord?"

"It's just a formality. The Kre'o Protectorate has been very generous to me in exchange for my hands-on rulership of this galaxy, but it's about time that I moved on to bigger and better things. Gentlemen, this is my administrator, Vanette."

"You know how to pick 'em!"

"She's the one we heard on the comm."

"Vanette handles all the details of my operation. Listen, I need to take care of this. My guards will show you to your quarters where you can clean up. We'll talk more later."

>Go along with his plan for now
>Sneak off and try to find the axis
>Try to get Vanette on your side
>Something else

Roll a d12 and link to this post for whatever you do, please! To roll, put dice+1d12 in the Options field!

Rolled 6 (1d12)

>>5216803
>>Try to get Vanette on your side
Surely our cause is more just than his.

Rolled 9 (1d12)

>>5216803
>Try to get Vanette on your side

Rolled 5 (1d12)

>>5216803
>Go along with his plan for now and grab a new burner
We need to find the cat lady first.

File: guided tour of force.jpg (105 KB, 800x600)

105 KB JPG

"I was hoping Vanette could show me around."

"She doesn't stray far from Warlord Starcrash's side. Here are your quarters."

File: lounge act.jpg (145 KB, 800x600)

145 KB JPG

"Jake!"

"Satina! Are you alright?"

"I am not injured."

[whispering]

"See anything interesting about our host?"

"He is the man in the dreams. His desire for conquest, it is boundless."

"I figured as much."

"What did he say to you?"

"Aside from offering to expand your family tree, not much I hadn't already guessed at. He's planning on using the temporal axis to rewrite reality and make himself a god. He wants us to help."

"Us?"

"Me and that other Jake. Sounds like he might have some more of me on his side as well. He's also got a psychotic supercomputer named Alpha working on how to control the axis."

"The alien creature, it said if this Jake continued to use the axis, that it would-"

"I know. I don't think this guy cares."

File: firm exit.jpg (111 KB, 800x600)

111 KB JPG

"What are you doing?"

"Maybe I can find his administrator. See if I can talk some sense into her. Or at least find a burner."

[door opening noise]

"Hmm... door's not locked. No guards. I guess they don't want us to feel like prisoners."

"Wait! I do not want to be left alone here!"

"Stay here. I'll be back soon."

File: clone wars.jpg (125 KB, 800x600)

125 KB JPG

"My superiors tell me they are pleased with the suppression of dissidents in the spriral arm. Your tactics appear to have been most effective."

"I'm glad your bosses are happy with my leadership. Is that the only reason for this visit?"

"My concern arose when I failed to hear from you."

"I've been busy working on the temporal axis."

"And you say this device will enable us to continue expanding the Protectorate?"

"Oh yeah. It's gonna change everything."

"Good! Good. I will inform my superiors of this new development. I am sure their pleasure will be equal to my own. Now, about the matter of the rebellion in the Arc of Nations..."

File: bump and dump.jpg (141 KB, 800x600)

141 KB JPG

"I thought he said you took care of this stuff."

"And I am unsurprised that you found your way here. I have yet to meet a single one of you who isn't bold and unruly."

"How many of me have you met?"

"Perhaps not enough. Are your quarters unsuitable? I thought you and your Celat would-"

"Don't change the subject."

"What would you like to discuss?"

"At the moment, your boss's plan. The Chronitan told us that using the axis was causing it to weaken. You must be aware of other problems like the ones I've seen."

"Those were issues related to our unfamiliarity with the axis. We're no longer attempting to manually operate it, and when Alpha finishes-"

"That's something else. I don't trust that your Jake's been able to tame that computer. If this Alpha is anything like the one we tangled with, it should be shut down and dismantled, not hooked up to a device that controls reality. For all you know, that thing's affecting his mind to do what it wants."

File: change of first course.jpg (135 KB, 800x600)

135 KB JPG

"Their meeting is almost over. I must go. You should return to your quarters. You will soon be summoned for dinner."

"I'll take it under advisement."

>Tell the Kre'o Ambassador about Warlord Jake's real plan
>Ask Black Jake to get you a burner from the Dragon
>Sneak around the complex and look for other Jakes
>Something else

Roll a d12 and link to this post for whatever you do, please! To roll, put dice+1d12 in the Options field!

Rolled 1 (1d12)

>>5218664
>>Sneak around the complex and look for other Jakes
Let's see how many Jake heads LQ owns

Rolled 5 (1d12)

>>5218664
>>Sneak around the complex and look for other Jakes
Supporting!

>>5218664
>Tell the Kre'o Ambassador about Warlord Jake's real plan

Rolled 9 (1d12)

Rolled 11 (1d12)

>>5218664
>Sneak around the complex and look for other Jakes
>Tell the Kre'o Ambassador about Warlord Jake's real plan

File: the gossip behind the throne.jpg (127 KB, 800x600)

127 KB JPG

[distant voices]

"How did the meeting go?"

"You know how dealing with bootbrains can be. What's the progress on the axis? Has Alpha..."

File: foreign flag.jpg (113 KB, 800x600)

113 KB JPG

"Ambassador! Wait up a moment!"

"Yes, human? What do you require?"

File: more than he bargained for.jpg (133 KB, 800x600)

133 KB JPG

"It's about Warlord Starcrash. I think you should know he's planning to use the temporal axis for his own personal gain. It won't do anything to help you, and it'll probably-"

"Yes, we are aware he plans to betray the Kre'o Protectorate."

"Wait, you are?"

"Of course. Based on your actions, I assume you wish to hinder his plan. Is this correct?"

"Well... yeah."

"Good. You are familiar with the Alpha-8K computer?"

"More than I'd like. Why?"

"This device will interfere with the computer's operation. It must be attached to the data input node. If you are caught, I will deny giving you this device."

File: freebie.jpg (117 KB, 800x600)

117 KB JPG

"Thanks, I think."

"Not at all. If there is some way in which I may express my gratitude, please allow me to do so."

"You could tell me if you've seen anyone else who looks like me around here."

"I believe there's another human dwelling in the chamber at the end of this hall. I have seen him come and go on occasion during my time here."

File: coming in on the ground floor.jpg (110 KB, 800x600)

110 KB JPG

[muttered chanting]

[chanting stops]

File: getting it off his chest.jpg (116 KB, 800x600)

116 KB JPG

"You! You're here at last! That means he's almost finished!"

"Yeah, we're not exactly a scarce commodity these days. So far that's me, two others, and you. How many more of us does that guy have stashed around here?"

"None!"

"You mean he let them go, or-"

"Of course not! He's never going to share power with anyone! He only allows me to live so I can... wait, he's coming! Hide, quick!"

File: uninvited guest speaker.jpg (132 KB, 800x600)

132 KB JPG

[door opening noise]

"There's my favorite swami!"

"I... I didn't... you said you wouldn't-"

"Something to feel guilty about?"

File: dreading between the lines.jpg (142 KB, 800x600)

142 KB JPG

"N-n-no, of course not-"

"I'm just messing with you. Listen, I need you to make yourself presentable and come down to the banquet hall. Some of the other Jakes are here and I need them to feel like we can all get along together."

"N-now? But-"

"I don't think I have to tell you what'll happen to Renleigh if you upset the other Jakes."

"No! Please, I won't-"

"I know you won't. It's been good working with you so far. You've been very useful. When all this is said and done, you'll have a universe all your own."

"I-I-I-"

"I'll see you at dinner."

File: crying fowl.jpg (129 KB, 800x600)

129 KB JPG

"That was too close. Who's R-"

"Heed the Emerak!"

"Emerak? You mean that little green duck?"

"Hurry! You must go now, before his guards arrive to escort me. Go!"

>Try to plant the device on Alpha
>Try to get Black Jake on your side
>Try to find the axis and get home
>Try to get cleaned up before dinner
>Something else

Roll a d12 and link to this post for whatever you do, please! To roll, put dice+1d12 in the Options field!

Rolled 3 (1d12)

>>5219527
>>Try to get cleaned up before dinner
We can use the gathering as a distraction for whatever comes next.

Rolled 10 (1d12)

>>5219527
>Try to plant the device on Alpha
then
>Try to get Black Jake on your side

File: evening one exploit.jpg (118 KB, 800x600)

118 KB JPG

"THIS-CYCLE-IS-COMPLETE-THE-NEXT-WILL-OCCUR-IN-TEN-MINUTES."

"WE-SHOULD-CHECK-THE-RELAYS-FOR-OVERHEATING."

"AGREED."

[whirring noises recede]

"About time!"

File: installation tsk.jpg (99 KB, 800x600)

99 KB JPG

[whispering]

"If I had my way I'd take a burner to you, but I can't tip my hand just yet."

KLIK

File: dinner plan.jpg (84 KB, 800x600)

84 KB JPG

[rapid footsteps, panting]

"If I hurry, I can still make it in time for-"

File: dinner execution.jpg (140 KB, 800x600)

140 KB JPG

[panting continues]

"...So then I said to- Oh, Jake! You're just in time for dessert."

File: dinner hesitations.jpg (126 KB, 800x600)

126 KB JPG

"Satina here told us you weren't feeling well. You look a little red. Hope it's not catching!"

"Oh, uh... I'm sure it's just a side effect of the temporal axis."

File: happy campers.jpg (129 KB, 800x600)

129 KB JPG

"By the way, thanks for putting up with coming here on short notice."

"Hey, I don't mind stickin' around here if we're getting meals like this every day!"

"Yeah! Real meat, an' this booze ain't bad either!"

"When it comes to friends of a Jake, nothing's too good!"

File: tuck job.jpg (159 KB, 800x600)

159 KB JPG

"I need you both to get a good rest tonight. Tomorrow is going to be draining, physically and mentally. I've got a great feeling about this!"

File: cross talk.jpg (115 KB, 800x600)

115 KB JPG

"Hey, you got a second?"

"What's on your mind?"

"Listen, Geri and Kristobar might trust this other Jake, but I sure don't. I smell a setup."

"You're right. He doesn't plan on us getting out of here alive."

"You sure about that?"

"I talked to Swami Jake. He's being strong-armed."

"I knew it! We've gotta stop this guy before he stops us."

"Yeah, but we can't just shoot him. He never goes anywhere without guards, and there are weapon sensors all over this place. If only Prim was here."

"Who?"

"She's... good with machines. What about Geri?"

"Nah, female Lonoids and technology don't mix."

"We could use some backup."

>Try to go home and get your own crew
>Try to convince Satina's Jake to help
>Ask Swami Jake to help lead them here
>Something else

Roll a d12 and link to this post for whatever you do, please! To roll, put dice+1d12 in the Options field!

Rolled 8 (1d12)

>>5221532
>Ask Swami Jake to help lead them here

Rolled 5 (1d12)

>>5221532
Attempt to contact our duck buddy for advice.

Rolled 1 (1d12)

>>5221532
Rolling to support >>5221573

>>5221627
Well fine then, be that way.

File: unsound mind sound.jpg (109 KB, 800x600)

109 KB JPG

[frantic, nervous chanting]

[chanting stops]

[door opening noise]

File: peer support.jpg (130 KB, 800x600)

130 KB JPG

"What are you- you can't be- if he sees us-"

"Yeah, that's why we have to work fast. Now shut up and listen to this Jake."

"The first time I jumped paths, I switched places with a Jake whose crew was a Moxan and a Frygenian. As far as I know, he's with my crew, or at least still in their universe. If we can get them to use the axis in that universe to travel our direction, they can pick up his crew along the way. The Chroniton has already realigned the axis to direct it toward us."

"Tell him about that other Jake."

"The Jake from Satina's universe is the captain of an enormous spaceship. Some of their technology is beyond anything I've ever seen. They might even be able to go hull-to-hull with this guy. If we can get that Jake on our side, he might be able to fix the problems the axis is causing, or at least neutralize Warlord Jake. You told me to heed the Emerak, right? Well, I might not be able to contact him anymore, but I think he told me to gather the other Jakes."

"So, will you help us?"

"Yes, but it won't be easy. I can contact one of his crew while they're still on their path, but once they cross over they'll be on their own the rest of the way."

File: learning curveball.jpg (144 KB, 800x600)

144 KB JPG

"Alright, let's get back to our quarters before any guards-"

"Wait. I'll need your help to do this. Both of you."

"Huh? What do you mean, my help?"

"You heard the man!"

"I don't know anything about that resonance stuff!"

"You're about to get a crash course."

File: home front loading.jpg (123 KB, 800x600)

123 KB JPG

"No, Lorien is the Frygenian, Nomi is the Moxan. And there's no Empire, at least there hasn't been for a few thousand years, ever since Octan made their-"

"Hey!"

"What's wrong, Ash?"

"It's him!"

"Who?"

"My father! I mean... it was him and some other people... they were also him, but..."

"You mean he contacted you? What did he say?"

"We're supposed to find a planet inside the cloud. There's an energy source-"

File: captain's backlog.jpg (153 KB, 800x600)

153 KB JPG

[voice on overhead speaker]

"Come in, High Captain Starcrash!"

"Away team, report. Have you found them?"

"Sir, we found traces of Lady Satina and the... the imposter... near the energy source. However..."

"What is it?"

File: three for brawl.jpg (91 KB, 800x600)

91 KB JPG

"There's another imposter here, sir! With a group of armed beings!"

Roll a d12 and link to this post for whatever you do, please! To roll, put dice+1d12 in the Options field!

Rolled 10 (1d12)

>>5221664
Appeal to his ego to save the universe (and Satina)

Rolled 11 (1d12)

>>5221664
>Challenge Satina's Jack to a duel
He got too comfy in that captain's chair

File: beaming smile.jpg (91 KB, 800x600)

91 KB JPG

[high-pitched warbling noise]

"Captain!"

"Status, Mister Sawyer?"

"They seem to have materialized out of that energy source, Captain. The one who looks like you claims to be you from another universe, just like the one who kidnapped the Lady Satina."

File: laying out the gauntlet.jpg (113 KB, 800x600)

113 KB JPG

"And just where did you stash my lady? What is this, some sort of transport device?"

"I didn't have anything to do with your woman. I've never even been in this universe before."

"But you do know where she is."

"From what I understand, she's with the Jake that passed through here a little while ago. They're waiting for us, but we need your help."

"You'll get help, alright. Mister Platchett?"

[tinny voice over small speaker]

"Yes, Captain?"

"Transit these five directly to the ship's brig. Remove their weapons as you do. We'll get to the bottom of th-"

"Wait a second! I'm Jake Starcrash, this is my crew-"

"Greetings!"

"Hi, Jake."

"-and that's the crew of a Jake from another reality. We came here seeking your help because another Jake with a nasty streak found this alien ruin and plans on destroying all the other realities to make himself a god. ALL the other realities, including your own. We're headed for his home universe, but we could use some help from a Jake who can teleport things at will."

"This story is getting more far-fetched by the second! Mister Platch-"

"I'm really Jake Starcrash, and I'll prove it. Let's settle this, man to man, captain to captain. And none of that universal resonance stuff. Even if you don't care about us, at least do it to save your woman."

"Just say the word, Captain, and I'll give 'em all a hard stun with my burner!"

"No, Wally! No interference from any of you. That's an order."

File: destructive reasoning.jpg (142 KB, 800x600)

142 KB JPG

"Are you sure about this, Jake?"

"I figure this guy's just like me, except he hasn't been lifting his own crates!"

[loud, frantic background music]

File: upper handed maneuver.jpg (127 KB, 800x600)

127 KB JPG

[loud, frantic background music continues]

"Rrragh-"

"Yaaagh-"

[grunting, straining noises]

"Yaaaah-!"

"Aauf-!"

"Look out, Jake!"

"Get 'im, Captain!"

[shouts of encouragement]

File: locked and loading new scene.jpg (127 KB, 800x600)

127 KB JPG

[choking noises]

"Had enough?"

File: waiting game.jpg (129 KB, 800x600)

129 KB JPG

"Well?"

"You're not gonna believe it-"

File: punchcard game.jpg (150 KB, 800x600)

150 KB JPG

[door opening noise]

"Mister Platchett!"

"Yes, Captain!"

"Direct your men to begin work on portable sensor scramblers to mask our burners from detection. I need you and the ship's computer to get cracking on that ruin planetside. We might need to use it to take the ship into another universe before we're through here, so we better know how it works."

"Right away, sir!"

"Miss Swenson-"

File: bridge game.jpg (160 KB, 800x600)

160 KB JPG

"Assemble an assault team. Maximum armament."

We will return with more Jake Starcrash, but I'll be out of town all weekend so the next update will be Sunday at the earliest.

Thank you to everyone for playing so far! If you're enjoying this and want to catch up on Jake's previous adventures, most of the past Lego Quest episodes are archived on suptg along with all the pics:
https://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=lego%20quest

The official Lego Quest wiki has writeups for most of the main characters and I have about a dozen tabs open right now for adding new pages:
https://legoquest.fandom.com

And if you are on twitter you can get a tweet whenever a new episode is live:
@EndmanOfFuturon

Stick around!

>>5222608
Thank you for running! This thread is kino so far.

File: naming right-hand woman.jpg (163 KB, 800x600)

163 KB JPG

"First of all, my thanks to this Jake-"

"Our Jake!"

"-for helping me see the seriousness of all this. We don't have much time, so here's our plan. Two other Jakes are waiting for our arrival in Warlord Starcrash's complex. They'll join us as soon as we arrive. Once there, we'll split into three groups. Lorien and Satina-"

"Right."

"Dahling, anything."

"The Kre'o Ambassador has alien technologies unknown to anyone in Warlord Starcrash's galaxy. It's possible he's willing to help us if the alternative means standing by while his timeline is destroyed. As the two most cultured individuals among us, you must convince him to do all he can to help us."

File: conversing all-stars.jpg (107 KB, 800x600)

107 KB JPG

"I understand the Ambassador's material composition is different than anything else in our galaxy!"

"Even among aliens, he is the alien."

"With luck, he'll have something that can-"

"That's far enough, you simpering little snobs!"

File: heavy can't wait.jpg (116 KB, 800x600)

116 KB JPG

"We'll see if that Jake still likes you after I'm through with you!"

File: fur suits them just fine.jpg (172 KB, 800x600)

172 KB JPG

"The ancient supercomputer Alpha-8K remains functional despite the Kre'o Ambassador's device. We're not even sure what it was supposed to do, or if it worked. One of the Jakes waiting for us-"

"Other Jake!"

"Alright, Other Jake and Primrose have reason to believe that Alpha is an imminent threat on its own. Primrose and Nomi, you're the best technical minds we have. That computer needs to be shut down before it finishes deciphering the temporal axis."

"Wait until you meet the Jake from our universe!"

File: sniff and scratch that.jpg (90 KB, 800x600)

90 KB JPG

"Am I glad to see you! How's Ash?"

"She's taking it well enough. I think she understands how important all this is."

"Thanks for bringing my burner along."

"Hey, wait. I smell-"

"What's wrong, Nomi?"

"-a Sprengren?"

File: poached and bedeviled.jpg (111 KB, 800x600)

111 KB JPG

"I'll try not to burn too many holes in those pelts. Take 'em all out!"

"AT-ONCE-MISS-KALEN."

"AFFIRMATIVE."

FRRRZZZZAP

FRRZZAAAPPP

"They've got us pinned down!"

FFRRZAAAAAAAP

FRRRZZZZZZAAP

"Aaaaiii!"

FRRZZZAAAP

FRRRZZZZAAAAP

"Prim!"

File: disposable scene wipes.jpg (153 KB, 800x600)

153 KB JPG

"Warlord Starcrash has somehow been able to absorb the energy of numerous other Jakes. Not only has this augmented his ability to perceive the deep universal resonance, but it's given him supernatural strength and regenerative capabilities. It's going to take all we've got to bring him down before he can go through with his plan. I will face him directly, alongside Black Jake, Our Jake, Krum, and the assault team."

"Right. Everyone will be armed with standard military burners-"

"I'll keep my heavy burner, thanks."

"Sir, I-"

"You heard him, Wally! What the Sporc wants, the Sporc gets!"

File: throne of game.jpg (89 KB, 800x600)

89 KB JPG

"I'm glad you saved me the trouble of tracking down the last of you."

File: militia mash.jpg (170 KB, 800x600)

170 KB JPG

"You didn't think you could keep your plan secret from me, did you? Ubyray and Kalen are probably taking care of the rest of your friends right now. In the meantime, I'm sure my men will enjoy the practice."

[numerous burner-activating noises]

Roll a d12 and link to this post for whatever each team does, please! To roll, put dice+1d12 in the Options field!

Rolled 1 (1d12)

>>5228159
>Get Warlord Jake to monologue about his plan to stall for time.

Rolled 10 (1d12)

>>5228159
Dance harder than you ever did before to avoid getting shot.

Rolled 7 (1d12)

>>5228159
>Warlord Starcrash perceives a deep universal heart attack

File: stalling card.jpg (118 KB, 800x600)

118 KB JPG

"Listen, this doesn't have to come to violence. We're all reasonable Jakes here. I'm sure we can work out some kind of compromise. Let's talk about your project. What do you think about-"

File: carded.jpg (102 KB, 800x600)

102 KB JPG

"They're stalling. Bombardier, commence."

File: moving in for the grill.jpg (160 KB, 800x600)

160 KB JPG

"YOUR WILL IS MY COMMAND, WARLORD STARCRASH!"

FRZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZAP

File: barbecue the waterworks.jpg (120 KB, 800x600)

120 KB JPG

"Wally! Noooo!"

File: quick rundown.jpg (162 KB, 800x600)

162 KB JPG

"Open fire! Destroy them all!"

FRRRZZZAAAP

FRRZZZAAAAAP

FRRRRRZZZAAAAAAP

FRRRRZZZAP

FRRZZAAP

FRRRRZZAAAAPP

"Aaaah!"

"I think I've got a better plan!"

"So do I!"

Roll a d12 and link to this post for whatever you do, please! To roll, put dice+1d12 in the Options field!

Rolled 8 (1d12)

>>5229155
Split it up and trick soldiers into shooting each other.

Rolled 8 (1d12)

>>5229155
The ambassador’s device activates and starts replacing everything Lego with Kreo.

Rolled 10 (1d12)

>>5229155
>Alpha-8K's drones gun down the enemy

File: reverse discourse.jpg (179 KB, 800x600)

179 KB JPG

[all shouting in unison]

"Break and fake!"

"What the-"

FRRZZZAAAP

FRRRRZZZZZAAAAP

FRRZZZZAAAAAP

"Yaaaugh-!"

"Aaaugh-!"

"You idiots! Look out, they're-"

File: shooting gal allies.jpg (126 KB, 800x600)

126 KB JPG

FRRRZZZZAAAAP

FRRZZZZAAAAAP

FRRRRZZZZZZAAAAAP

FRZZZZZZZZAAAAP

"Aaaiiii!"

"Aaaiiii!"

FRRZZZZAAAAP

FRRRZZAAAPPPPP

File: firing squared.jpg (156 KB, 800x600)

156 KB JPG

[burner noises stop]

"UNDERSTOOD."

"WE-WILL-OBEY."

"Hey, what's the matter with y-"

FRRZZAAAAAAAP

FRRZZZAAAAAAP

FRRRZZZAAAAPPP

FRRRZZZAAAAP

"Yaaaaugh!"

File: elements of surprise.jpg (158 KB, 800x600)

158 KB JPG

"What the-"

"Jake, look! There's something happening to it!"

"The panels!"

"Looks like you've got a rash, Alpha! I assume you're the one who saved us?"

I CANNOT ALLOW YOU TO CROSS INTO THE LAND BEYOND AT THIS MOMENT, JAKE STARCRASH OF UNIVERSE 9029. RESEQUENCING COMMENCING ON JAKE STARCRASH OF UNIVERSE 97 NOW."

File: quite the feat but not qu(...).jpg (122 KB, 800x600)

122 KB JPG

"Not bad... then again, you ARE all Jakes. Too bad I have to-"

File: this oriented is disoriented.jpg (132 KB, 800x600)

132 KB JPG

[inhuman bellowing noises]

"What the-"

"He's... he's-"

"What's happening to him?"

File: teleport prompter.jpg (123 KB, 800x600)

123 KB JPG

"Aaaaugh-! The time has come for the final stage! The axis is calling to me! Destroy these Jakes before they bother me any more!"

[high-pitched warbling sound]

"He's getting away!"

File: burning desire.jpg (133 KB, 800x600)

133 KB JPG

"I don't like the sound of 'final stage'!"

"You guys go help the others. I'll deal with this clown."

"He's got an electrosword! He can block your burner!"

"That thing will cut through you like-"

"Just hurry up before that lunatic goes through with his plan!"

Roll a d12 and link to this post for whatever you do, please! To roll, put dice+1d12 in the Options field!

Rolled 6 (1d12)

>>5230307
Mullet Jake fights Warlord Jake on a tiny walkway over a massive vortex of Kre-O, Mega Bloks, and knock off Lego bits.

File: shock to the System.jpg (129 KB, 800x600)

129 KB JPG

[pained groaning noises]

"Aaaugh... if that bootbrain ambassador had anything to do with transmuting me, I'm taking him along to make sure he-"

KRADROOOOM

File: coming in with a bang.jpg (136 KB, 800x600)

136 KB JPG

"Thought I smelled something behind that wall. From what I hear, this electrosword can cut through anything."

File: rev reviews.jpg (156 KB, 800x600)

156 KB JPG

"Anything... except a blutonium chainsword."

BRRRMMMMMM

[rumbling sound]

"Wha-?"

File: glowing review.jpg (178 KB, 800x600)

178 KB JPG

[rumbling sound intensifies]

KRRROOOOOMMMMM

"Whoooh-!"

VRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

"The axis is destabilizing! Someone's tampered with Alpha!"

File: the warlord strikes back.jpg (163 KB, 800x600)

163 KB JPG

"Too bad, I was looking forward to killing you all slowly! I'll have to make this quick!"

BRRRMMMMMMMM

VRRZZZZZZZZZZZ

BRRMMMMMMMMMMM

VRRZZZZZZZZZZZZZ