Welcome to Joffrey Baratheon Self Insert Quest, where you play as the cursed QM Elsweyr who has been punished for his questing sins by being cast into the body of the most unlikable Game of Thrones character - one destined for failure and death - on the day of his 12th birthday, right before the events of the A Song of Ice And Fire novels start to occur.Last time, Joffrey Baratheon sparred with Robb Stark, danced with Sansa Stark, convinced Mance Rayder to capture a wight to show the Night’s Watch to forge an alliance, received permission to travel to the Wall from King Robert and suggested that Jon Snow attempt to join the Kingsguard.Now, Joffrey Baratheon enjoys his days of leisure at Winterfell sparring with the Starks.Oh, yeah, and he also started fucking his mother. Wew lad!Archive: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/qstarchive.html?tags=Joffrey%20SI
You are immersed in the chorus of thuds and grunts in Winterfell’s courtyard this cool afternoon, sweating pouring down your chest from your earlier exertions exchanging friendly blows with Robb and Theon.Your younger brother Tommen is currently sparring against Bran under Ser Rodrik’s tutelage, both boys so heavily padded for their safety they look like ambulatory pillows. The two children huff and puff as they bat at each other with padded wooden swords under the master-at-arms’ watchful eyes. You and a dozen other spectators call out encouragement to the highborn lads dueling, competing with the eldest Stark boy for who is cheering the loudest. After a while of circling and hitting one another, Bran knocks Prince Tommen onto his ass with a particularly devastating thud and your plump sibling is unable to get up, rolling around in the dust. Tommen looks like a turtle on his back thanks to all the padding. His auburn-haired opponent stands over the prone Tommen, wooden sword upraised to whack him once the fat blonde regains his feet.All around you, the many knights and squires in the livery of Lannister and Baratheon who accompanied the royal party to this northern fortress, subjected to watching this childish display, start laughing. “Enough!” Ser Rodrik calls out. He steps forward and gives Tommen a hand, yanking your brother back to his feet. “Well fought. Lew, Donnis, help them out of their armor.” Cassel looks around, stroking his magnificent white chin whiskers as he does. “Prince Joffrey, Robb, will you go another round?”Robb, already sweaty as well from your previous bout, moves forward eagerly, grinning from ear to ear. “Gladly.”You move from your resting position under the cool shade of the high stone wall, striding into the sunlight upon being summoned. Squinting your eyes, you look up, noticing two figures watching the martial training of noble children from above.On a covered bridge between Winterfell’s armory and its Great Keep sits a window. In that window, you spot Jon Snow and Arya Stark seated on the sill, watching the combat with rapt attention. Striding forward, you gesture up to the two spectators in their makeshift box seats. “Lady Arya, Jon,” you call their names with a smile, startling the two figures with your address. “Why don’t you come down here and join us?”Jon looks absolutely mortified while Arya’s face lights up like you may have just made her dreams come true.There is a cacophony of gasps as you make that suggestion, even Robb squinting his eyes somewhat, analyzing you to see if you’re joking. “I know you’re scared of me kicking your arse again, Your Grace. But my sister Arya’s only nine.” There are some soft chuckles at your expense, before you whirl on the cocky manlet.“But your baseborn brother Jon is the better sword between the two of you, or so I’ve heard,” you counter, smirking as Robb scowls at the truth of your words.
“Mayhaps I wish to test myself against a more skilled opponent, Stark. And your sister may yet perform well against either Bran or Prince Tommen. We should see.”Ser Rodrik strides forward, a deep frown etched into his features. “Martial practice is no activity to involve a young girl in.”Sandor Clegane snorts. “Why not? The padding, the wooden swords - your training’s fit for women and children.”Theon Greyjoy, his black doublet emblazoned with the golden kraken of his House, barks out a laugh, a look of wry contempt on his face. “They are children, Hound.”“Then why not include Arya,” you tack on to Theon’s derisive comment. “She’s clearly interested, furtively watching our training from above rather than embroidering with the rest of the girls.”“It’s improper to hit a lady,” Ser Rodrik bluntly states. “The behavior is unbecoming of prospective knights.”The Hound howls with raucous laughter at that statement.You chuckle as well, though to the master-at-arm’s credit, neither Tommen nor Bran look particularly pleased at the prospect of being in the lose-lose situation of fighting against a girl - a Sophie’s choice of emasculation if they lose or being a bully if they win.“Well, is it improper to be hit by one?” you offer a compromise. “What if one was to merely defend and parry, training their defense while she tired herself out striking out in an attempt to land a blow. Let her have fun. Arya certainly won’t get inured by that.”It’s Robb’s turn to laugh now. “Careful, Joff. The Crown Prince beaten by a young girl would make for quite the song.”You shrug. “That’s my risk to take, isn’t it? I’ve danced with one of your sisters already, Stark. Is it really so strange I should dance with the other?”Rodrik relents finally, now that he’s relatively confident this isn’t an excuse for you to see a little girl get beaten up. “Fine. If Lady Arya wishes to participate, then she may. If, for whatever reason, she is struck or otherwise hurt, I’ll end the bout then and there. Understood?”“I’ll be there quickly!” Arya calls down to the gathering of squires and knights, grabbing her half-brother Jon by the sleeve of his outfit and yanking him from the window sill. Both of them should be here in the yard in a matter of seconds, you presume.Sandor Clegane steps close, whispering to you. “You sure this is a smart idea, little lord?” He’s one of the few men who gets to call you little, your muscular giant of a sworn sword still towering over you. “Bruises you suffer in the practice yard from trueborn swords may be overlooked, but bastards and girls aren’t allowed to damage young princes.”>”Dance” with Arya>Spar with Jon Snow>Ask Robb to duel Jon so you can determine which is the better sword>Convince Tommen to get in the ring with Arya. You know he probably wouldn’t be able to hit her if he tried anyway.>Other (write-in)
>>4801109I fully agree with the Hound, we have to keep up appearances. We can't be seen fighting little girls.>Ask Robb to duel Jon so you can determine which is the better sword
>The 7k+ post shitpost-quest continuesFucking epic
>>4801109>”Dance” with Arya
>>4801100>You know who your real mom is in the real world and it isn’t this blonde, incestuous slut. Cersei might be a brotherfucker and, now thanks to your influence, a sonfucker, but you certainly aren’t engaging in incest yourself. At least not mentally.Are you retarded. Incest is because of genetics. If you take over somone else's body your now genetically that person. Meaning if you fuck their mom your fucking your biological mom, just beacuse somone didn't raise you doesn't make them not your mom. Were you adopted trick and then did you use this justfication to go around fucking your biological family, you sick fuck.
>>4801109>>Other (write-in)>Propose we do doubles. Jon and Arya agains yourself and Robb. If Jon truly is the best of you all, it's just about fair.
>>4801125 It's just a cope anon
>>4801134The answer to all of your questions is yes, but not because of genetics, but because incest is based
>>4801132isn't not isn't
>>4801125>Incest is because of genetics.Deleted post because I can't read, lol.No, but seriously. If you're adopted, is it totally okay to fuck your adopted sister,, brother, mother father?Is that just all hunky dory because you're not genetically related even if they've raised you like one of their own?
>>4801109>Ask Robb to duel Jon so you can determine which is the better sword
>>4801109>Propose we do doubles. Jon and Arya agains yourself and Robb. If Jon truly is the best of you all, it's just about fair.A battlefield isn't the same as a duel.
>>4801142Of course not. Such unchristian thoughts violate the sacrosanctness of familial bonds. Thankfully this is a fantasy where we can live out our mutual fantasy of self inserting as a prince in a kingdom going to shit and fuck anybody hot because we can. In real life though? Nah that's gross and it puts sex drama into the family that I can speak from experience is not very helpful to find out when your sister is fucking daddy for fivers.>>4801125How can you be a real feudal lord if your family tree isn't a ven diagram?
>>4801142We should shoot off a letter to Oedipus to ask his expertise on the incest matter. He is quite acquainted with it after all. I'm sure he will write back very swiftly once he sees our question in the mail.
>>4801160>Oedipushe was an irrational retard.All his children were thankfully not terribly deformed incest babbies. He could have just stopped fucking his wife and ruled his kingdom, but instead he let the whole thing fall into disarray because he couldnt handle accidentally fucking his mom.
Is this quest by discord tranny rigging votes?
>>4801160People who think incest was the problem with Oedipus actually miss the point of his story.
>>4801167Should I explain the joke to you? Or do you just think it isn't funny?
>>4801158Ah, but that shit was to keep land in power in the family. Wasn't because they were all incest loving sweet home alabama singers. Of course some did sing that song. It was condemned by the church for dad, brother, sister, son, daughter and mom shit. Cousins and aunt/uncle on the other hand.. Depends on the location.
>>4801160 Poor guy didn't even know that he was banging his mom, I doubt he could really say anything.
>>4801176forgot the nieces and nephews. Was also allowed.
>>4801171I was just trying to get some eye rolls at a bad joke, b.
>>4801176Yeah see there's good merit to keeping power in the family. In our case, I don't really know what our case is, but I'm sure we can make a case for it after everyone else is dead.
>>4801172>Should I explain the joke to you?Is the joke that Oedipus blinded himself?
Remind me, what are this board's rules on outright smut
>>4801181>eye rollswas this also a joke about oedipus blinding himself?
>>4801187If it's not reported then it's allowed. :^)
>>4801182Because genetics it's not the greatest idea to do. Need enough different genes in the family or you Spanish Habsburg your line and what do you have then with that power?You can do some [insert family member] breeding, but man don't do that shit for too many generations.
>>4801192Like so many things. If it isn't enforced the laws weren't broken.
>All this seething by nofunallowed posters just like predicted last thread
>>4801203that's what you get for following schizo bitch like Trick
>>4801109>Double's. Us & Arya, vs Jon & Robb. We know they won't hurt Arya, and won't double team us either.
>>4801203Just wait until the Cat scenewe're on for that, right?
>>4801142Of course not, but just because you shouldn't fuck you adopted mom doesn't mean you should fuck your bio mom. Your orginal post was some shit tier smut and just seemed like some thinly veiled attempt to try and justify what you know is wrong. Did you fuck your sister trick? It's ok you can tell me.
>>4801193Agreed. And now that that's good and settled we can move on to question the nature of nobility owned sex zoos and the ethics of renting out political prisoners to byzantinac baboon rape circuses. Strangely enough, Westeros lacks the overt animal fucking that is historically associated with most mid-medieval to renaissance cultures, and wales.So technically we're already very high on the "moral chain" when compared to, say, real life West Francia. But that's not much of a surprise I suppose.>>4801203Don't fuck that dragon anon, that's immoral and gross.
>>4801158t-thats very specific anon
>>4801202If incest is about genetics, then why is it wrong to fuck your adopted mom?Is that because incest isnt about something so simple like genetics (because in that case, literally everyone with a genetic defect who reproduces is just as bad if not worse than people who engage in incest) Listen buddy, I watch a lot of Destiny debates on this topic, okay: you can't defeat me on this subject. I'm mentally untouchable.
>>4801100Trick.Do we eventually get a Cersei pastebin or is it more like, nah not worth it right now?
>>4801103>tfw we never received the Cersei smut post
>>4801109>Spar with Jon SnowDad won't mind so who cares if he hurts us
how are rules about linking to smut?
>>4801226What do you mean? The vote was to fuck. The post said "and then they fucked". That's it. There it is.
>>4801217The animal shit was frowned upon and even then was a fringe group. Medieval isn't the same as immoral. Different need thanks to different circumstances.
>>4801219From experience. Go far enough north and it's just like going far enough south, or far enough west. Honestly I don't get it, but rural people absolutely love searching for dates at family reunions.
>>4801223Because it was mother's day, I decided to do a small Cersei seasonal event which jumped the queue. I wanted to do the sparring post first which started this thread first since it technically received more votes, as did robert baratheon. I may just post an actual, more detailed sex scene in the old thread later, just in case it draws ire from the moderators of this website.
>>4801241It's only fair. Not getting axed is a good idea after all.
>>4801211Changing to this line up.>>4801235You don't know what smut is, do you?
>>4801237Sure but a couple of eccentric nobles funding rape circuses rings out pretty hard, even when such an event is a one-off thing during a multigeneration war and triggered a crackdown on heresy. Could've just been propaganda from the writers of history, hard to tell. At least no culture regressed to pre-roman animal head wearing ceremonial orgies.Basically what I'm saying is we are morally superior because we only fucked our mother once, and we don't have zoos, so we're double moral.
>>4801211 I like this vote
>>4801221Incest isn't a man made concept. Nature has gives us a revulsion to sexual realtions with our family to stop it. Because it invenitably leads to genetic deformties that harm those offspring of incestuous realtionships. There is no 100% contraceptive espically in medevial times. So any time you copulate with a female family member your risking putting more suffering into the world. Fucking your adopted mother is wrong because it will cause mental damage. Their role as a parental figure is important and shouldn't be corrupted.>(because in that case, literally everyone with a genetic defect who reproduces is just as bad if not worse than people who engage in incest)Unrionally yes. If your genetic defect is inherently negative and can't be mitigated by modern technology you shouldn't be producing offspring.
>>4801252He's right that smut wasn't really necessitated from that last post. That being said, Trick does have a rich history of writing smut, so I do expect something more there.
>>4801252>You don't know what smut is, do you?Sorry, only know snuff.
>>4801241Post it in the qtg. That way there's no problem with the thread. Lol.
>>4801255>pre-roman animal head wearing ceremonial orgies.My friend... You know that shit happens nowadays?>Basically what I'm saying is we are morally superior because we only fucked our mother once, and we don't have zoos, so we're double moral.The zoos part. Yes pretty normal compared to the rest.The mother part. Meh not gonna even start on that one, because that shit moraly complex.
>>4801109"I can just say it was the heat of the moment, getting a bit hurt is something i can laugh it off this days. As well take responsability, the idea was mine afterall everyone heard me.">>4801211support
>>4801113>>4801130>>4801150>>4801147Robb duels Jon>>4801117>>4801131 >>4801151>>4801211>>4801252Dance with Arya>>4801228Spar with Jon>>4801252Changing? You fucking dynamic IP posessing nigger, this is your first post from that ID in this thread. God I hate you "people">>4801259Uh oh, the biologically essentialist, eugenics supporting nazi is here to lecture us about genitically reproducing so we can create the (white) unbermensch. Here we go . . . But seriously, if someone like Tyrion Lannister having a kid with a woman he loves like Tysha, despite the high chance his kid will have dwarfism, is just as bad as Jaime and Cersei fucking, then no, incest isn't that big a deal and yet we both know, mentally and in our hearts, that Tyrion having kids with a woman and producing a dwarf - even if we would advise against it - is a far cry less morally monstrous and disgusting and disturbing than Cersei and Jaime fucking and producing two out of three decent children despite the genetic risk. Incest is so much more than just "hurr durr, percentages" because if it wasn't we wouldn't bat an eyelash at twin brothers fucking or mothers fucking their daughters.But we do.
>>4801259There has historicaly been a 100% contraceptive. It's a pretty old idea. It's called the backdoor.
>>4801274>Changing? You fucking dynamic IP posessing nigger, this is your first post from that ID in this thread. God I hate you "people"No, I was the one who first pitched doubles, just with us and Robb vs Jon and Arya. I don't want to samefag and you counted my vote twice.
>>4801268Well I wasn't going to mention furries because they lack the raw religiosity aspects or animal sacrifice, I think?, and if these things happen in some 3rd world tribe that's been in mud houses for 2000 years I'd feel weird comparing it to Westeros which has things like the Red Keep and stirrups. As for college fraternitys who participate in various modern sex cults... I guess some might technically count as nobility depending on their parents. Huh, hadn't given it much thought.>>4801274>But we do.exactly!>>4801277based
>>4801211 That's smart
>>4801277>not busting such a fat load that it dribbles out and slips into the bagooYou need more hydration my friend.
>>4801277Do you think people in the medevial times knew how to stop people from getting infections from putting your dick in an asshole.
>>4801280Your ID totally changed, idiot
>>4801284Well. If you can blast deep enough that shit (heh) shouldn't be a problem.
>>4801211Support, if we miss this for the current update, put it in the next one.
>>4801274>schizo starts screeching about nazis againlike a clockwork
>>4801294Too hard and you get the backblast bro. The fine line of safe non-impregnating anal is elusive.
>>4801291Man there have been creams for a lot of things historicaly. Despite Hollywood potrayal of ancient times. People tried to at least be health and be clean. It was because of hygienic and social factors. Where do you think our desire to look clean comes from?
>>4801291Yes, the Romans invented the Enema and the East Romans washed their hands in it.Hm..Actually we're a self-insert, so we can impart a tiny bit of modern hygiene to any partner we want. So long as it's not fucking guns.
>>4801300How do you spot the nazi fatefag in the quest? You don't. You just let them angrily announce themselves.Damn, I thought i'd start this new thread with less shitposting but here we are
>>4801274>>4801211>>4801252>>4801258>>4801270>>4801283>>4801297These are all votes for Us & Arya vs Jon & Robb.
>>4801308You're running a pretty popular quest right now and suprised there is shitposting? Some shitposting is actually really nice. Of course not a good idea to make the whole quest so, but hey. Sometimes things need to be less serious.
>>4801308Best way to stop shitposting is to get everyone to repeat the same thing. 50% of the time it works 13% of the time.
>>4801293It did. So did my vote. The "Changing?" in your post was in reponse to the latter, unless you think my dynamic IP only changes when I want it to. But that would be silly. You aren't silly, are you Trick?
>>4801308IGNORE THEM, START WRITING
>>4801308>new thread>less shitposting
>>4801314>works 13if only 13% would actually work ;)
>>4801308How do you notice QM is a retard? When he screech "nazi fatefag" at anyone dissing him. :)
>>4801305you said the g-word ....
>>4801320I thought you wanted less /pol/tard shitposting, not more?
>>4801321>I'm REALLY UPSET for some reason that you keep insulting nazisBut why? I mean, if you're not a nazi, why do you care that I call nazis retards? >B-because . . . uh, I'm so NOT a nazi that you talking shit about nonexistent nazis annoys meWhy are you getting offended on behalf of nonexistent nazis? Oh, by the way, I love Israel and the Jewish people. I think diversity is awesome. You agree, right my non-nazi friend?
>>4801321Yeah all two of them.Don't worry anon, you won't be thrown out for being a retard or a nazi.
>>4801332>typical leftistPlease keep real world politics out of the quest.Historic refferences? sure that alright.Also lefty? Nazi calling? Really people. I thought we weren't cringe.
>>4801330>tfw you're so anti-thing that you ironically become thing to prove how good anti-thingism is because of how bad the thing you became is thus making you the hero of anti-thingyAnyone else getting a headache?
>>4801274I said inherently negative, fucktard. Unless your saying a dwarf's life is inevitabley going to lead to suffering, I don't want to hear it. I touched on why parental figures and their children shouldn't copulate in my last post. Sisters and brothers are much for the same reason, but to a lesser extent. Also nice job assuming I'm a nazi for disagreeing with you. That's a typical leftist for you.
>>4801332>saying a dwarfs life is inevitabley going to lead to sufferingOf course it is. So is being genetically predisposed to being short or bald, especially if you're a man. And if there are issues with family members fucking (this is what we might call, um, incest) that has nothing to do with genetics, then clearly the moral negatives involved with incest are far removed from purely genetic factors.Which, now that we can finally go from hypotheticals to this specific situation, is why - from Elsweyr's point of view - this ISNT really incest. Because he doesn't have a true familial bond with Cersei AND even if he did reproduce with her, the genetic offspring wouldnt be any worse than Tyrion reproducing and allowing another dwarf into the world. Ipso facto, fucko, get fukt.Nazi>>4801338I'm actually giddy as a school girl right now.
>>4801337Dude really deleted his post.Don't do that shit.Actually respond to people's critique and have a calm debate.Ideas aren't solid and changing your mind or changing someone elses mind is normal. That's how new ideas are born and discussed.And last but not least. Deleting the post makes all the things you said worthless. People don't like that, because it's just petty.
>>4801338Round and round the drain we go, off to dilate it with fanfiction cope and some family oriented manhwa.>>4801342Can we introduce a policy of hand-washing with clean water to the doctors of King's Landing?
>>4801330>Anyone who criticize me is da natzi!yep, retard>I love Israel and the Jewish peopleYou love expansionist, racist, segregationist outlaw state? Not very proggresive, my cucked friend.>I think diversity is awesome.Do you housing some refugees in your house? Talk is cheap after all.>You agree, right my non-nazi friend?Dunno, you really sound like some nazi here. We have to abolish racist police, right?
>>4801342>>4801342So, now we get to fuck Cersei, thus cucking both Bobby B and Jaime. Given the players we'll likely keep it in the family with Myrcella as well when she's older. Now the real question: when will we get to meet the BOAR?
>>4801354This could be doable. Also the soap.
I'll be honest - I don't give a fuck about "muh nazis". I'm here for BOARquesting.
>>4801354did George the Mountain Range mentioned anything in particular about that in his books ?
>>4801337>I thought we weren't cringe.First time posting with Trick? Faggot rigged vote in his former quest because he was assblasted about his playerbase views lmao
>>4801366Yep, if Trick doesn't support this, he's a nazi too. :) ACAB!
Why even bother voting for things if the niggerfaggot qm is just gonna write whatever fanfic he wants?
>>4801342>>4801354I guess what I'm saying is anti-fascists should thank Hitler for giving them a reason to exist. And McCarthy should have thrown a few how-do-you-dos to Stalin and Mao. Maybe the thingism was the friends we hated along the way.
>>4801359>>4801359>Now the real question: when will we get to meet the BOAR?This thread, probably. If I can stop procrastinating by poking the /pol/tards in the thread.>>4801356Nice dog whistle, nazi. Go back to /pol/ before I start writing about Summer Islanders fucking Sansa.>>4801372>assblasted about his playerbase viewsAnd what views would those be, hmmm? At least have the fucking spine to just say that yes, you are a nazi. This pilpul you're doing to pretend you aren't while defending yourself from my insults in fucking embarassing.
>>4801187Apparently the mods don't pay much attention to reports, perhaps there haven't been enough?
>>4801371The Maester's had some special hygiene practices but it was never clearly stated to exist outside their doctrinal sphere.
>>4801380Repat with me, you nazi. ACAB!
>>4801356FFS. really. If you wanna debate then prepare for a reasonable debate>Yep, retard.Shit isn't an argument. It's the same as saying Nazi, because you dislike them.>You love expansionist, racist, segregationist outlaw state? Not very proggresive, my cucked friend.It was probably as a reference to what the Nazis did and that Trick isn't one.>Do you housing some refugees in your house? Talk is cheap after all.Diversity isn't the same as refugees and nobody talked about housing refugees in your house. It's actually better to get them their own houses and getting some sense of not being a refugee.>Dunno, you really sound like some nazi here. We have to abolish racist police, right?You know that last question was bait right?
>>4801342Your delusional if you think people need to have a full head of hair or be tall to have a happy fulfilling life. Let me better define what I'm talking about since inherently negative doesn't seem clear enough. When a genetic disease will inevitably lead to a life being ruined or highly damaged it shouldn't be passed on. An example of this is if grey scale was genetic and those who carried it would have a 1/4 chance of their offspring expressing the gene. Those people shouldn't reproduce. Incest can cause alot of things worse than dwarfism and thus it shouldn't be done. Retard
>>4801386Better question, why are you defending self-admitted vote rggier?
>>4801388I don't know my hair is starting to thin and I'm pretty much living a 3/4s life right now. I'm straight up not having a good time.
>>4801388Stop debating Joffrey-in-Elsweyr's body. >>4801380When you say we'll meet the BOAR, do you mean we'll hunt a boar, or that we're about to become an orphan (officially at least)?
>>4801391I haven't yet seen the proof of vote rigging yet.Also it's the QM. The QM decides what goes or doesn't go. If people don't like what the QM does the quest just dies. It's simple supply and demand.
>>4801394I'm hoping he means we get to go out and have a nice candlelit dinner in the woods with a fine fuzzy fat friend.
>>4801394 We'll find of a group of boar baby's around a dead boar and adopt them as our own.
>>4801398In the north they only carry lanterns outside. Oh my god I'm fucking autistic. I'm going to post this because I actually thought of that.
>>4801382then i guess we could introduce it, basic stuff like washing the hands. Maybe we can humor ourselves after the explanation, and ask them the opinion on why westeros as one common tongue on an entire continent despite being so vast ? Speak even by wildlings on the other side of a giant magical ice wall lmao>>4801394Hunting boars and succeeding would be nice, not all nobles can do that. Hunting is useful even for learn how to move around in the wild, which can be used for war later on.
>>4801405Anon... can you imagine? A fate point for findingDIRE BOARS
>>4801109>>Ask Robb to duel Jon so you can determine which is the better sword>>Convince Tommen to get in the ring with Arya. You know he probably wouldn’t be able to hit her if he tried anyway.>>Other (write-in)Tell Tommen he needs to practice his defence after Bran knocked him down. This is free training and he is NOT to hit Arya, but rather get used to defending himself and building up his strength/fatigue. The offence will come later. Most importantly he is to be reassured that this is not a humiliation, but a gesture for the Lady who is clearly interested in practising, and anyone who makes fun of him is to answer to us.
>>4801406You can put a cnalde in the lantern.Okay I don't know what the hell dimension my fingers entered to butcher candle that hard but I'm rolling with it.
>>4801396Of course, after all samefagging is allowed only when Trick has a meltdown about natzis under his bed. >>4794709
>>4801409. . . . . . you get a fate point
>>4801380>Summer IslandersThat reminds me, when we get back to KL I want to go to the kitchens, invent fried chicken, and serve it to Jalabhar Xho.
>>4801391Pretty good question
>>4801409seems you don t need to imagine anymore. How big though should be an adult direboar, and how we will tame it ?
>>4801396>I haven't yet seen the proof of vote rigging yet.He literally admitted to it you retard
>>4801425A big boar will come up to thigh or hip height. So it would probably be stomach or nip height I'd say.Though boars here ain't boars there. And I am taller than your average bear. So take that as you may.
>>4801417>>4801409My God...What power, in the hands of one anon!Use it wisely or autistically.
>>4801415>>4801426You see. Now that I have read it.There is a reason that /pol/ was invented.If the QM has enough of your vile shit, you can expect the quest to blow. There is a line between shitposting and you outright making a cespool.I do disagree that rigging the vote was scummy, but man it was probably one of the greatest circus moments.
>>4801426Even if he did maybe try a different approach? Calling each other names and bitching wont help.If you care about this quest thing dont be dicks to each other and stop shitposting i wanna know what will happen with ramsay.
>>4801432Interesting. I am not sure how Joffrey will be able to tame/train it, beside finding early on a direboar pup. Westerosi seems to have cats and dogs, plus farm animals and anything exotic for rich nobles probably. Maybe a lion would be more symbolic, if they exist in the Westernlands or in other parts of Westeros. But a direboar is a fun idea
>>4801426Where did he?
>>4801436>disagreeI meant agree.
Anybody else just want to play a fun Westeros Isekai quest without autistic screeching?
>>4801436We're talking about retarded schizo here. He probably saw someone posting about how black criminals shouldn't be treated with kiddie gloves, throw a fit and called his discord tranny squad to the help.
>>4801437Until something triggers him again and he will rig another vote here. :)
>>4801449Can't we just keep the shitposting at a minimum or at least quest related?Quest is more for quests.
>>4801440Well pigs are relatively intelligent, and boars are just asshole pigs. The dire probably makes it a bit smarter than normal as well. So it would probably be pretty sociable and trainable. It would also probably weigh as much as a warhorse despite being half the height. Maybe even more because B R O A D.A lion would be more symbolic but boardchads are unstoppable as the beast they proclaim their love. Once the charge has begun you can only get out of the way.Oh yeah, and a direboar would have tusks like an elephant and not some stubby like four inchers.
>>4801453We call that 'fortifying' around here.
>>4801109You know, since the Hound brought it up, we should have HIM defend against Arya. We could tell him he's right and piss him off at the same time.
>>4801446Controversial topics inevitabley lead to arguments when presented to a diverse group of people. I've been liking this quest so far, I just had to criticize trick's retarted attempts to justify his incest fetish.
>>4801458That would be a really bad idea. That guy is meant to protect us. Better not piss off the guy too much.
>>4801454But QM rigging votes is quest related though
>>4801458Let's not emasculate the one guy who could actually protect us from the Mountain.
>>4801462Ok. You've got a point. But it was with a different crowd. Don't think Trick will rigg shit with this crowd.
>>4801468How is it emasculating to practice with a child?
>>4801469Considering he starts screeching about nazis at any criticism and how broad is that term in current amerimuttland I wouldn't be so sure about that. :)
How about we start a Royal R&D, so we can "discover" modern Things Like gun Powder, germs aka wash your fucking hands and the printing press?
>>4801474A child -girl-.
You step forward, away from the looming shadow that is your bodyguard Sandor Clegane. Clearing your throat, you give life to your idea. “I propose we do doubles. Arya and I can spar against Robb and his half-brother Jon.”Everyone laughs. Absolutely everyone.Your furrowed brow of confusion is the only thing which tips Robb off that you weren’t actually joking. He blinks in stupefaction at the apparent seriousness of your suggestion. “My brother Jon and I would demolish you, Your Grace,” he informs you bluntly. “And neither of us are going to lay a finger on our sister. No.”Jon and Arya emerge from the first floor of the armory to join the cackling crowd of combatants.The Stark bastard and his half-sister - their familial resemblance obvious as they stride into the courtyard side by side - both look suspicious as they emerge into a scene of raucous merriment, likely afraid the foreign, Southron prince had actually been playing a cruel jape on them, by inviting the unlikely pair to join in the mock sword fighting, which, if an outside observer was to judge your invitation compared to your other silly proposition, they would most likely believe you had been preparing to pull the rug out from under them, laughing in their faces that these individuals judged by society writ large to be unfit for combat against highborn nobles thought they might have a genuine shot to prove their worth against their betters.You feel your cheeks turn hot from embarrassment.>I AM THE PRINCE AND YOU SHALL DO AS I COMMAND!>Forget Arya, I’ll duel Robb and Jon both. Two on one. Let me prove my skill.>You’re right, I was joking, obviously. Jon fights Robb while I indulge Arya’s tomboyish fascination.>Other (write-in)
>>4801483>Forget Arya, I’ll duel Robb and Jon both. Two on one. Let me prove my skill.Well ok then.Let's get ready to clap their cheeks (not in the smut way).
>>4801483>>You’re right, I was joking, obviously. Jon fights Robb while I indulge Arya’s tomboyish fascination.oh well.
>>4801483>>Forget Arya, I’ll duel Robb and Jon both. Two on one. Let me prove my skill.
>>4801483Jesus... Robb is acting like a gigantic douche>>Other (write-inHave Robb duel Jon and Arya duel Tommen.
>>4801483>>You’re right, I was joking, obviously. Jon fights Robb while I indulge Arya’s tomboyish fascination.
>>4801483What the actual fuck.
>>4801504How is robb a douche here, anons voted to be stupid, he at least answered honestly, everyone else in the yard is laughing at us.
>>4801504+1 ikr feels out of character
>>4801512This isn't show Robb!Gary Stu anon.>>4801483>>You’re right, I was joking, obviously. Jon fights Robb while I indulge Arya’s tomboyish fascination.And Jeez Trick are the Fatefags really shitting up the thread again? Where are the Jannies when you need them...
>>4801483>You’re right, I was joking, obviously. Jon fights Robb while I indulge Arya’s tomboyish fascination.Stop purposefully misinterpreting our choice of prompts you absolute mongoloid
>>4801519>Stop purposefully misinterpreting our choice of prompts you absolute mongoloidhow did I misinterpret?>>4801312This outlined exactly what Joffrey proposed in the update.
>>4801512He's acting more like his uncle Brandon than the kid who just wants to be Ned 2.0.
>>4801483>Alright Robb, Rest assured, I've no intention of paying any of you the slightest disrespect. >I'll spar with Arya. (Give her good pointers like Jamie did. Be GENTLE). You can spar with Jon, and the two winners can pair off.
>>4801512>Muh me and my brother would demolish youHe says as he barely wins against a man who had never done sword training in his life until a few weeks ago inserted into the body of a younger boy suddenly.The amount of cockiness is just astounding.
>>4801521Yeah, that's book Robb alright. Show Robb barely spoke and was perfect at everything even when he knocked up that random thot. D&D were biased to the Starks.
>>4801520Hey Trick if you had to self-insert yourself into a character in our Westeros, who would you pick? Just a question.
>>4801520>This outlined exactly what Joffrey proposed in the update.You're 100% right, it completely did. It was this tally that confused me, because the doubles option wasn't there.>>4801274
Just as a heads up, if you had suggested doing a two on two against Jon and Robb with Bran or Tommen at your side, you would have also been laughed at for your silliness of including a seven year old in a four way combat between teenagers.But choosing your partner to be Arya was just so outlandish you actually avoided being thought of as a fool by most of the people because of how insane that is that they assume you MUST be joking.
>>4801523I'd absolutely get her some knocks and lumps. She wants to play with the boys. Play with her like the boys. Of course I'm not a medieval lad and I am unafraid of hitting him disabled trans-girl-boy-girl-helicopter children with a closed fist straight out of their motor wheelchairs. But all these prudes around us watching would frown upon the true friendly beatdown that Arya would receive as she so desperately wishes. If we did beat the shit out of her though she'd go super fucking turbo HAM on sword training and not just be a little dancing stabby weenie.I want to hit this child.
>>4801531I'm not Trick but I'd replace FAegon. Easiest fucking character to replace, just swing some swords and sit around acting princely and let your Blackfyre groomers do all the heavy lifting.
>>4801535Sasuga sexist Westeros. As much as Dorne and Valyrians were shat on they got some things right.
>>4801483>>Other (write-in)>Then I'm afraid I'll be able to do away with one of you while your sister occupies the other. I doubt she subscribes to such niceties as yourself.
>>4801523Add in with a whisper to Robb, that you won't hurt her. You just want to give her a chance to participate in something she clearly wants to, and probably won't ever have the chance to again.
>>4801531Not him either but I'd pick Daeron the Young Retard. I'd spend my days fucking the shit out of my One itis infested future bride, having a million kids so Baelor dies in a Sept somewhere, and burn every woods witch over a pyre with some dragoneggs until something sticks.
>>4801526Show Robb is another one of those cases in the show where the role was well cast but written poorly
>>4801548There's a good Daeron The Good quest on Akun, if you want to coom it also has some nice colonizing brown girls moments with his Dornish bride.
>>4801483>You’re right, I was joking, obviously. Jon fights Robb while I indulge Arya’s tomboyish fascination.
>You’re right, I was joking, obviously. Jon fights Robb while I indulge Arya’s tomboyish fascination.or can we just have jon+clegane+ned+robert+robb vs tommen
>>4801483I vote against autism. Don't care what that looks like, just make it good.
>>4801566can somebody use a fate point on this please?
>>4801483>>You’re right, I was joking, obviously. Jon fights Robb while I indulge Arya’s tomboyish fascination.focus on not hitting her!
>>4801568Too late, in their eyes we said something absolutely autistic as the crowned prince of the seven kingdoms. Might have been even worse than the ratburger line since we said it to the sons of a major lord.
>>4801558I'm already reading it and black, so telling me about the colonization would only have turned me on.Good quest though, and good recommendation. Thanks anon.
>>4801566>killing our heirAll the more reason to impregnate our mother. Gotta have spares.
>>4801572Use the Fatepoint to have Robb shit his pants with explosive diarreha. T-That will teach those normies not to laugh at us.
>>4801579Turned me off* Jesus that fucking nigger Christ
>>4801566Hey woah, a five on one? That's hardly fair. Throw in a quarter of the garrison as well so they stand a chance against little Tom tom.
>>4801531>our Westeros???I'd probably self-insert into Robert Baratheon just after Robert's Rebellion if I could.Think about it, you're a prime beast of a man with a hot blonde wife. Here's my autistic Elsweyr-tier 15 point plan.1. Actually "love" Cersei, because I personally don't give a flying fuck about Lyanna. Sure, she fucks her twin and that makes me a cuck, but if I fuck her right and actually say her name when I cum in her vag, she'll love me regardless. I'll actually have some black-haired heirs most like because Cersei only got impregnated by Jaime because canon Robert is a serial cheater.2. Try to get Cersei to embrace her bisexuality so I can have tons of threesomes with her and other women. Maybe if that works and Cersei's into it I start fucking Jaime too. He kinda looks like Cersei and maybe he'll bottom. Probably not, but maybe we can get over that whole twincest issue together in a way that doesn't produce incest-babies. Worst case scenario, I do my best to get Jaime fucking killed in the Greyjoy Rebellion. Speaking of 3. The Greyjoy Rebellion. I fucking execute Balon. Fuck that cunt. I want him dead. 4. I tell Eddard I know Jon is the son of Rhaegar and Lyanna and promise him I'm no longer mad about being cucked. In fact, I speak with Eddard about maybe finding a way for Jon to marry my eldest daughter if I can. Legitimize him or something, maybe keep him in the dark - I'm sure my best bro Ned will work with me on that front. 5. I keep the NIght's Watch in tip top condition any way I possibly fucking can. Holy shit, maybe try to begin negotiations with the wildlings, see what can be done to prepare for the White Walkers.6. I tell Jon Arryn to ditch that cheating slut Lysa, pair him up with some fertile girl - maybe a Frey.7. I don't fuck with Daenerys or Viserys at all. In fact, I probably send letters to Daenerys once she gets power and dragons trying to establish conversation with her. I want those fucking dragons to save me from the ice zombie apocalypse. I will abdicate my throne to her if it prevents the fucking apocalypses. Maybe betroth her to Jon Snow and abdicate the throne. Even if Daenerys decides to execute me, I've lived longer than canon Robert and spent two decades fucking the hottest baddest blonde bitch this side of the Narrow Sea.8. Seduce Oberyn, seduce Oberyn's paramour, seduce Oberyn's daughters. Try to smooth things over with Dorne. Holy shit, maybe work with Doran to kill off Tywin and Gregor. Tell those sandniggers that I was pissed at the Mad King and didn't give the okay to rape and murder Rhaegar's bride and children. That was the Lannisters, not me.9. Figure out a way to bro it up with Tyrion. Pit him against Tywin by telling him the truth. Fuck, if I can swing it, interfere to ensure Tyrion stays married to Tysha and doesn't get raped. 10. Probably kill Varys. I can't trust him.11. ?????12. Profit.
>>4801583Or... we use the fate point to bang his mom. Just putting that out there as a suggestion
Friendly reminder that DIREBOARS are now quest canon. Imagine riding one of this fuckers! Dragons are for pussies.
>>4801598>dragon lands to munch on some fried goat near a tree line>dire boar comes screaming out of the woods and gores the dragon to death right in the lank ass neck>laugh as dany seethes and cries herself to sleep over dead baby because BOARS CAN'T BE STOPPEDIt is a good life.
>>4801597Oh yeah.13. Stannis, my brother, is the fucking Mannis.I make him the Lord of Storm's End. I make him the Warden of the East if I have to. I have him construct a badass fleet in preparation for the greyjoy rebellion. I make that motherfucker my right hand man. Maybe interfere in his marriage to marry him to someone less fucking lame than the woman he ends up with. Shit, maybe I marry Stannis to someone in Dorne. I'd give my bro Princess Ariane or something. Hot dornish pussy
>>4801483>You’re right, I was joking, obviously. Jon fights Robb while I indulge Arya’s tomboyish fascination.>Quietly give some tips and pointersI do hope this option doesn't humiliate us further, but I'd like to avoid pissing off Jon and Arya just because we fucked up socially. This is the only way they won't come out of this hating us.
>>4801597As chad as Stannis is he is constantly shat on for having zero charisma and backing the wrong faith, and had the shit on his head be coupled with stinky piss because his own brother Bobby is best friends with the dude who was the exact same no charisma autsitic personality as you in Eddard. Stanny the manny is the last person you would want to be, especially with your sword swallower younger brother being a little ungrateful shit.
>>4801591>Sure, she fucks her twin and that makes me a cucklol cuck
>>4801605Forgot to mention Bobby favors Eddard in the sentence, fuck typing while just waking up.
Now why would anyone do something as idiotic as involving Arya in the training for good boy points from her in front of everyone? On the trail when there's not many people to judge us, that I might have understood. This is Gendry-tier fangirling over a popular character.
>>4801605I didn't say I wanted to be Stannis. I said that the plan Elsweyr has is plebeian. You want to know who I would self insert? WIllas Tyrell.
>>4801598I know this has nothing to do with this post, but this reminds me of a CKII game I once played where I was Stannis and Robert executed Theon Greyjoy by having him gored to death by a boar. Gave me a good laugh.
>>4801613>the nofun posters are back
I wonder if Joffrey is still suffering from the "curse" of the Targeryans/mental instability.He may not be an insane prick like in the original show.But I can imagine that perhaps all the fierce debate about incest and guilt still goes on in his head.
>>4801613But we're heading for the Wall anon.But having Bran fight Ayra would've been the best option available, since we'd be insulting our brother by making him fight her, and if Bran injures his hand, bye bye climbing while in Winterfell.
>>4801621Our shitposting is 1000% going on in his head.He is constantly thinking about rats, gendry, nazis, boars, momfucking, unclefucking, futuretech, and dragons.
>>4801603Damn I was gonna use my fate point to insert you into the Robert Baratheon of now so Eleswyr would be your son, all dmpc like, but now I want to play a RB SI instead and want to idea preserved as is. Welp I know what I want now.I considered turning the dothraki into white nationalists. shut upI considered getting Jon to fuck Sansa. For the spite.Perhaps a little bit of my soul left when I thought of allowing diatomaceous earth to turn wildfire into bombs. Too gay though.>>4801446I considered giving our wonderful MC an autistic screeching disability during our next social interaction specifically because of this anon.I even had this absurd idea for Trick themselves to be isekei'd into our Westeros as Margery or Tommen as well, but I'm not that mean.So I had two quarts of black sesame ice cream, with broken up dinner mints, and rubbed one out to get my thinking really clear for this.I use my fate point so that on our way to the wall we encounter some strangely loyal, trainable DIRE BBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRSdetails as thou wilt, pls no djin us and have our party ravaged by boars
>>4801636If we become King, and give lots of money to the alchemists and black smiths, how well do you think they could trial and error themselves into a musket or like some really early chinese gunpowder shit like rocket arrows?
>>4801593I’m in favour of the Loras jizzing on Renly’s face 2 seconds after the tent blows away plan. Much more satisfying.
>>4801641They have a -169% chance of making it work. Because Sensei Coo Uem will not allow it.
>>4801639>I use my fate point so that on our way to the wall we encounter some strangely loyal, trainable>DIRE BBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRSSo unimaginably based that I have ejaculated from sheer chad osmosis.
>>4801642Seconded. Little faggy Renly needs to be humbled for even being allowed to breathe in the anti-gay ages. Despite everything he still has the audacity to even entertain usurping his own family for Tyrell cock- I mean clout.
>>4801591Either send jaime to the fucking wall for being a kingslayer, or kick him out of the white cloaks and give him back to tywin for sweet lannister gold. That should keep him from keking you. Actually if I was bobby b I’d say fuck it and sail to essos to become a merc before the wedding. Once my merc company is up in running I also form a harem of hot sluts from lys to yi-ti.
>>4801639God bless you anon and god bless BOOOOAAAAARRRRR
>>4801639>I use my fate point so that on our way to the wall we encounter some strangely loyal, trainable>DIRE BBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRSA shame.
>>4801621>I wonder if Joffrey is still suffering from the "curse" of the Targeryans/mental instability.He did just fuck his mom
>>4801650The easiest way I can tell if someone's retarded is if they sincerely believe Renly would have made a good King and argue Stannis is bad for killing him.
>>4801639Boar anons need to make a bobby self insert quest right now or else they are posers.
>>4801658Renly wouldn't last a week before Olenna arranged to poison his sword swallower ass for refusing to give Margarey an heir.
>>4801663Would he refuse to though? Plenty of gays still breed
>>4801660Hey that's not nice. I'm supportive of every anons faggy dream. Even the ratnons and gendroids. Let the boarboys have their time in the sun.
>>4801641Guns won't help us against the wintry hordes though. For most other enemies we currently can BS through via personal knowledge, for the most part. For the others, ,asses of archers with the correct dragonglass ammunition would be the cheapest, and we know that can work and is very quick to set up. Commissioning them ahead of time to have a great surplus would actually make a significant majority of our forces useful in the coming trials, in combination with Mance's success. I'm assuming he'll be successful of course.
>>4801241Just post it as a pastebin of any explicit scenes, no rules broken then.Fuck this trepidation shit, anyone here remember Bones Text Adventure quest by the original guy and then Understudy?They did fine.
>>4801668Renly is retarded enough to believe that him and Loras being a secret would last even with Littlefinger and Varys in court, and that Ned would pick him to be king instead of siding with Stannis. I'd think Renly might make an absolute Retard move like saying "Yasss gay rights" in medieval society.
>>4801663That's being extremely generous. His dumbass would probably think he's in a story and needs to lead the charge in an assault on Kings Landing with his lover only to get got by an arrow Daemon style. Margarey would then fuck some random dude and pass his kid off as Renly's since who the fuck is gonna say otherwise to the Tyrell's?
How hot do you think are the girls in Lys?I mean, some of them have probably been bred and trained literally from birth by generations of beautiful slaves to be ideal waifus (agility, singing, language, cooking as children, then the raunchy stuff as young adults).Think anyone would bat an eye if we ever decided to take a vacation there and bring some back home with us?I know slavery is illegal in Westeros so we just say we hired an uh, 'servant girl' or 'cup bearer' or some shit and give her 'golden bracelets' instead of iron cuffs.
>>4801685Exactly this. You're even more on the point than I am.
>>4801695 Booby might get mad since that kind of similar to Targaryen behavior.
>>4801436>muh nazisYou can make whatever kind of strawman you want, that faggot admitted to cheesing his own quests when he doesn't like how it's going. Sound familiar?>>4801437All I can say is that he will no longer be getting (you)s from me
>>4801446It is far too late for that.
>>4801695Just buy her and free her. Since she has no other ideas or prospects in life she'll come with us and probably do as we please.
>>4801446>Anybody else just want to play a fun Westeros Isekai quest without autistic screeching?Most of us do, but that's always been off the table.
>>4801663Book Renly was smart enough to give Maergery an heir. Show Renly? No
>>4801705Gotta roll for that. d100. She believes in freedom and being her own person and is fiercely independent unless you roll a 1. Best of two.
>>4801677>>4801685Renly quest when, imagine what you could do with the power of renlys chad energy and charisma while not being completely retarded and infected with gay.
>>4801709Someone needs to make one, idgaf if its boring Noblebright quest. I just want another asoiaf quest that is not boggs or the one I am currently following on akun. Its better than having the board shat up with the fate wish fulfillment quest.
>>4801591See guys... This is why we have to heavily interfere and fuck Trick's plans... otherwise we would have one of the most boring, faggiest, bland quests possible.
>>4801714My self-insertion to make my life easy and sexy is WAY different from what I think would make for a good quest. I honestly think this is pretty top tier of an idea though - Elsweyr had a fucking gold mine idea ready to go with a legion of loyal followers and he gave up on it due to uncontrollable autism.Tis a shame. Many such cases.
>>4801713What would it be about?
>>4801711>born and raised as a pleasure slave in a slaver society>but she believes in muh freedom and is 'fiercely' independent
>>4801685Also to add to this I just realized the Citadel is in Oldtown, so there's no chance it would ever get out since there are probably a hundred Tyrell descended Maesters just waiting to serve.
>>4801714Killing Varys isn't a bad idea though.I wouldn't support it because he's funny and a chaosfag, and I like that Varys thinks he isn't a chaosfag.
>>4801717It would be interesting if you started to add the deeper parts of ASOIAF lore like waterben- I mean magic, Shadowbinding, etc... A Bobby B that gives Stannis the reigns because he knows he won't ever betray him for the throne and just fucks off to Asshai every once in a while would be very interesting. Especially dodging the inevitable assassin's along the way and etc... All in the hopes of breeding a giant flying boar and making it's new race the lynchpin of Baratheon rule like the dragons.
>>4801718I want to see anon's take on the Dance of Dragons since we would obviously do that shit way better than HBO. Aegon's conquest would be fun for waifufags fighting over Rhaenys and Visenya, even though we all know that Combat Mage Visenya is best girl. I just want something, it could even be an OC character like in Mallroy quest.
>>4801492>>4801499Wow, it took two of you to beat me????>>4801497>>4801507>>4801517>>4801519>>4801523>>4801562>>4801566>>4801574>>4801604Fight Arya!>>4801504I'm not fighting anymore guise cuz you laughed at me >:(
>>4801709>>4801713>>4801718>>4801733Making one focused on a random OC from a period of "peace" in westeros seems fun. Like playing your own Tyrell or Arryn during the period of "Dunk & Egg"
>>4801723Welcome to bullshit quest verse. If you want it you have to beat the nonsense DCs.
>>4801733Are you asking for a self insert quest or just to play as an existing character? desu I don’t like self insert quests as much due to the abuse of future knowledge, more fun without it imo
>>4801733 Playing as another kingdom trying to fight Aegon's conquest would be interesting for a quest.
>>4801733I had an idea about an alternate timeline where some of the Darklyns survived the purge after the Defiance of Duskendale. But then I involved too many waifus in the story (including the MC's mom being based on Yennefer) and it never went anywhere because I thought asoiaf players won't fall for coombait. Now I see there's a market for that, I think I could dredge up my notes.
>>4801598I'm going to make these canon in some way.
>>4801598 The BOOOAR Calvary has arrived!
>>4801754Too many waifus and incestbait on top makes for a shitposting quest like this one.
>>4801754Haha is this the one where the MC fucks his mom or stepmom or something? Or maybe the MC was a bastard of a highborn mom? There was definitely something weird going on.
>>4801761I could take out the incestbait and cull the waifus to 2 or 3. But it was also a dark quest about taking revenge, with the MC ruining some innocent people of the rival house in his path to get back power. So that might be a problem.
>>4801765I stole 70-80% of the initial story from the House Silverbank creation thread which never went anywhere. Basically the MC is a bastard of a highborn Darklyn woman who escapes the purge, but is then married to the new ruler of Duskendale. The story is about getting the rid of the usurping family and getting power back to the Darklyns, in the background of Robert's Rebellion.
>>4801765Tell me your history, Boggs. You seem like an ASOIAF fanatic. Were you there, in the beginning.Were you there with Velo?
>>4801773>>4801768If you're going for revenge, why not make the MC a social climber instead of turning it into a "choose your path" dating sim type? A rare surviving Darklyn, maybe even a Darke or something with a Darklyn mom, trying to become the next Lord of Duskendale by manipulating and backstabbing his way up to one of Lord Rykker's daughters and then clearing a path for her to inherit?>>4801778I've been following on and off since Karban. I missed Velo, but caught up in the archives because things that bad need to be experienced.
>>4801738You dont like Robb do you
Rolled 30 (1d100)You utter a fake laugh as you suppress the tears which threaten to unleash themselves from your watery eyeballs. Swallowing your pride, you nod along with the rest of the men laughing at your words.“You’re right,” you quickly cover your ass in a lie. “I was making a jape, obviously. I’ll dance with Arya while you can prove the rumors wrong about how your bastard brother measures up to you, Stark.”Jon Snow shoots you a withering glare, clearly convinced you’re only pitting him against his half-brother in a showing of strength and skill to test his mettle and ability in preparation for joining the Kingsguard like you spoke of during the King’s welcoming feast.The wild child Arya, however, is brimming with energy and beaming at the chance to whack at you with a padded wooden sword. You glance back to your legion of sycophants and raise your eyebrows at them repeatedly in quick succession, assuring them with your cocksure attitude that you won’t allow the little girl to land even a glancing hit on you. All of them chuckle under their breath, save for Sandor, who simply fixes you with a serious stare that silently communicates the very pertinent message: Don’t fuck this up, idiot.The skinny, long-faced, grey-eyed brunette forgoes Ser Rodrik Cassel’s offer to garb her in protective padding. “If the Crown Prince isn’t going to hit back, what’s the point of slowing myself down wearing armor, Ser Rodrik?”The Northern knight huffs in frustration, twisting at his chin whiskers. He looks at you seriously and seems to make a silent, positive judgment of your character. “Aye, m’lady. Prince Joffrey won’t strike you, but if you hit yourself with the sword I’m ending the fight.”Arya giggles, shifting the practice sword the master-at-arms bequeaths her into her left hand, quickly adjusting to its weight and the feel of the weapon in her grip. Once she feels ready, the little nine year old girl with the fierceness and tenacity you know makes her a suitable candidate to eventually become an assassin steps into the arena, her expression of determination an intense one. Jon, meanwhile, has stepped in to spar with his slightly younger but legitimate brother - a dance they’ve done hundreds if not thousands of times by now, both of them so familiar with the other’s fighting style there is not a hint of anticipation lingering between them - merely dulled, sibling rivalry.Your conflict, however, is an untested one. And you hope to the Gods above you don’t get your ass kicked by an untrained little girl, regardless of what she’s going to grow up to become.Nearby, you spy two direwolf pups - Nymeria and Ghost - sitting obediently beside one another. The female has golden eyes and grey fur in stark contrast with its albino brother.“Begin!” Ser Rodrik bellows to start the dual duels.Arya screeches at the top of her lungs as she lunges for you, swinging wildly.>Roll me 1d100+50
>>4801785Honestly, I think he nailed Robb's character. We can hang out with Robb if the lads vote for it.
Rolled 14 + 50 (1d100 + 50)>>4801789let's make Arya look like an idiot
>>4801793not with that roll you won't. Nice job, you didn't get beat by a little girl. (barely)
>>4801793woopsI guess we're the idiot
>>4801784I couldn't think of a way the Rykker Lord would agree to a match between MC and his daughter. Maybe a suitors' ball or a tourney for the hand of a younger daughter (like Reynold) where you have to eliminate the competition, whether by outcompeting them naturally or using dirty tricks? That sounds fun. After that you start eliminating the other heirs to Duskendale while keeping it a secret from the wife.
>>4801796well anyway, give Arya mad props for keeping up with Joff, no talking down or playing it off as letting her do well
>>4801784>KarbanLinku, por favor!
Rolled 9 (1d100)>>4801789Based
>>4801794Play it off as letting her get a few hits in to boost her confidence.
Rolled 48 + 50 (1d100 + 50)>>4801789
>>4801793>>4801800Arya Mary Sue confirmed.
>>4801804In the collective defense of the dice rollers, this is the second time Trick has called for such a thing in 5 1800-post threads. Takes a bit to get warmed up.
>>4801778>>4801784Link to Velo?
>>4801801+1>>4801810I can only hope.
>>4801793Maybe from now on when we duel we don't pay attention to everything going on around us like a schmuck. We almost got thrashed by a child. Don't fight distracted.
Lets kek sansa with arya
>>4801793 Getting laughed at really rattled poor Joff
>>4801820No problem, Anon.
>>4801825It shouldn't even be that hard. Just go up to Bobby and tell him it's Arya who is the most like this Lyanna we keep hearing about. Sansafags get btfo and we get a waifu who has more personality than longingly staring at us. Everyone wins.
>>4801831>Everyone wins.I don't. Because that doesn't involve making Sandor smile.
Tell me what you think about this anons, interesting enough to play? >>4801797It will be dark and full of backstabbing and underhanded tricks as you're trying to eliminate first the rivals to the girl then all her family to get to the seat.
>>4801838I mean you can do it but if the writing is shit a cool premise doesn't matterso either do it or don't, it's down to you
>>4801838The idea is interesting, the real question is the execution. Don't lose heart if you're shit, as you only learn from the mistakes you make mate.
>>4801797>>4801838So long as it's not railroaded with the MC autowinning a daughter's hand, I'm game. These quests could use more allowances for failure in general.
>>4801758And the BOOOOAR Chariots! If we find enough pigs maybe in 10 years we can have an elite unit of BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAR Screamers!
>>4801841Writing is above ESL-tier and more than passable, but below Boggs' or even Trick's quality. No excuses for that. I want to see if there's interest. Anons might contribute their own ideas if they have a better take on it, and I'll consider them. Like Boggs just suggested a better way to achieve the goal than I thought of.
>>4801856So the plot is we kill off rivals to get a wife, then kill her family so she inherits and our future line is in power?
>>4801860Yeah. With a few twists added of course. Also rivals need not necessarily be killed. You could bribe a competitor to drop out, break his leg before the dance, threaten his family, etc.
>>4801854Would it be the Boared Hussars or the Winged Boarssars?
>>4801862Personally I don’t like playing scummy characters that much but I get it’s more unique.
Someone please start a Hogg or Crakehall quest for the boarfags. They’ve rapidly proven themselves to be the least funny variety of fag we have here.
She’s fucking aggressive, you’ll give her that much. It definitely throws you off your game enough to alarm you, that much energy radiating from an opponent so much smaller than you, even in comparison to her manlet brother.WHACK WHACK WHACK WHACKYou counter every swing and thrust easily enough with your own glorified stick, although Arya’s throwing them out fast enough in rapid enough succession to make you sweat and really have to work for it, tunnel vision developing as she becomes your world. You tune out the scuffle happening between Robb and Jon to your right as well as the whooping and hollering of the peanut gallery. The Stark girl’s vigor is not to be denied and the added handicap that you can’t take full advantage of any openings in her guard to punish the horse faced lass for overextending isn’t helpful for anyone involved - not her to learn proper techniques from the experience nor your own ability to utilize your full range of skills and maneuvers.One major advantage she possesses in her left handedness. You weren’t prepared for the awkwardness involved with handling that slight change to your expectations. Still, Arya’s ultimately an untrained female child and you’re a far taller twelve year old boy who’s been training rigorously near non-stop for two and a half months now with some of the best fighters on the continent in addition to whatever training the real Joffrey possessed prior to your possession of his body.She never had a chance at actually winning this engagement, it was merely your fight to lose if you really fucked up and let her get a hit in. Thankfully, despite your comparatively poor performance in comparison to the flashy twirls and ripostes you were able to whip out while fighting her older brother, Arya never once manages to get a hit in. The gulf in skill and muscle memory between you two is too vast an ocean for her to cross just yet, though she’s not so incredibly outskilled - thanks largely to you nearly jobbing right here and now - that she becomes discouraged. In a way, it reminds you much of your first real sparring session with Gendry when you went up against Ser Loras and how you never quite gave up despite his absolute schooling of your ass.You can tell Arya’s enjoying the experience, the temptation of a potential victorious exchange ever looming on the horizon and she is only ever annoyed when she notices you going out of your way not to smack her upside the head. The girl lusts for a real fight, even as she becomes drenched in sweat over the course of your dance. “What is the meaning of this?!” a familiar female voice rings out in alarmed incredulity.
>>4801884>“What is the meaning of this?!”Oh, hi Cat
Arya freezes, dropping her weapon. It clatters upon the hard-packed earth as you turn to see Lady Catelyn Stark fast approaching the circle of knights and squires watching children smack each other for entertainment on this otherwise boring day. You notice Jon and Robb have long since finished their own match and both look sheepish as the Lady of Winterfell rushes to arrive at the scandalous scene.Ser Rodrik Cassel steps forward, bowing before he attempts to explain himself. “I assure you, my lady, your daughter was never in any danger. The Crown Prince behaved nobly and was simply drilling his defense while Arya played.”That clarification doesn’t seem to soothe the mother’s fury much. “Arya was supposed to be practicing her needlework with Sansa and Princess Myrcella. Septa Mordane tells me she fled without leave. Young lady come here this instant.” Arya sulks for a moment while Jon Snow winces.>She was practicing her needlework, Lady Stark. Arya said her stitches were crooked and we were assisting her hand-eye coordination.>It was all my fault, my lady. I encouraged your daughter to pick up a sword. I accept full responsibility and submit myself to whatever punishment the North has to offer. Spank my bottom, if you must.>Your daughter is a warrior, my lady. Like the Mormont women of Bear Isle or the Sand Snakes to the South or the Spearwives from Beyond the Wall. She has true potential that shouldn’t be neglected.>I must admit, I wanted to dance with both your daughters Lady Stark. It seems Arya was far more comfortable with this style of dancing than any other, so I indulged her.>Say nothing.>Other (write-in)
>>4801900>It was all my fault, my lady. I encouraged your daughter to pick up a sword. I accept full responsibility and submit myself to whatever punishment the North has to offer. Spank my bottom, if you mustKinky
>>4801900>>It was all my fault, my lady. I encouraged your daughter to pick up a sword. I accept full responsibility and submit myself to whatever punishment the North has to offer. Spank my bottom, if you must.>>Your daughter is a warrior, my lady. Like the Mormont women of Bear Isle or the Sand Snakes to the South or the Spearwives from Beyond the Wall. She has true potential that shouldn’t be neglected.
>>4801900>>She was practicing her needlework, Lady Stark. Arya said her stitches were crooked and we were assisting her hand-eye coordination.We gotta ease into this one, lads. She isn't a sure thing like Cersei.
>>4801900>She was practicing her needlework, Lady Stark. Arya said her stitches were crooked and we were assisting her hand-eye coordination.>Your daughter is a warrior, my lady. Like the Mormont women of Bear Isle or the Sand Snakes to the South or the Spearwives from Beyond the Wall. She has true potential that shouldn’t be neglected.
>>4801900>>Your daughter is a warrior, my lady. Like the Mormont women of Bear Isle or the Sand Snakes to the South or the Spearwives from Beyond the Wall. She has true potential that shouldn’t be neglected.I feel like all of these options will piss off Catelyn
>>4801914ooh boy! New thread is up after I get back from work and Gym. Backing this one for the BOOOOOOAAAAAAAARRRRRRR Gang.
>>4801921good, lets get her hot and angrythen fuck her in her marriage bedI was thinking we could wait to seal the deal the day after Robert and Ned leave for the south, taking an extra day to prepare for our trip to the Wall.
>>4801900>She was practicing her needlework, Lady Stark. Arya said her stitches were crooked and we were assisting her hand-eye coordination.Hey, it could have gone a lot worse.
>>4801900>Your daughter is a warrior, my lady. Like the Mormont women of Bear Isle or the Sand Snakes to the South or the Spearwives from Beyond the Wall. She has true potential that shouldn’t be neglected.Encouraging Arya is the worst thing to do. That's why we gotta do it!
>>4801900>I must admit, I wanted to dance with both your daughters Lady Stark. It seems Arya was far more comfortable with this style of dancing than any other, so --->so SHE indulged ME.
>She was practicing her needlework, Lady Stark. Arya said her stitches were crooked and we were assisting her hand-eye coordination.HahahahBut the dancing line is pretty good too.
>>4801950no, discuss this
>>4801953fucking hystericalhave a fate point
>>4801900>Your daughter is a warrior, my lady. Like the Mormont women of Bear Isle or the Sand Snakes to the South or the Spearwives from Beyond the Wall. She has true potential that shouldn’t be neglected.+ >>4801942
>>4801950If you want a world where the Bolt-On theory is true, read my quest! http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/qstarchive/4560012/
>>4801900>>Your daughter is a warrior, my lady. Like the Mormont women of Bear Isle or the Sand Snakes to the South or the Spearwives from Beyond the Wall. She has true potential that shouldn’t be neglected.
>>4801957>hasn't seen this image before despite it being spammed non-stop for the past few monthshello newfag
>>4801950Shit is in all the wrong tiers.>>4801953Lost it at Kong Hong.
>>4801900>Your daughter is a warrior, my lady. Like the Mormont women of Bear Isle or the Sand Snakes to the South or the Spearwives from Beyond the Wall. She has true potential that shouldn’t be neglected.
>>4801953That's just the planetos full map, mate. Check out the final tier.Can't wait for the DeTroyt HBO spinoff. We wuz Ghiscari an' shiet.>>4801968Oh shit, hey Elsweyr.>>4801973I agree. I didn't make it though and can't be fucked to fix it.
>>4801950Iceberg is missing Vary and Illyerio = Mermen, Maester poisoning Dragons theory, Nettles is still alive theory, and Jamie is Azhor Ahai and Brienne Nissa Nissa. Other than that bretty gud, learned some new stuff too.
>>4801953Sure is a lot of dothraki shit separated by a long distance and water.
>>4801957oh boy do I use it for plot fuckery or coom fuckeryI'm a coomer at heart but we've used a lot of fate points for coom.Uhhh, what about the entire Kingsguard except Jaime and Barristan catch a deadly illness and die, opening up slots for our picks.or is that too much?
>>4801953Planetos people are flat earthers who can't map.
>>4801983>Maester poisoning Dragons theoryThat's included the Grand Maester Conspiracy. How do people reckon Nettles is still alive? I believe that she was the Fire Witch who's dragon the Burned Men worshiped, but she'd be older than Bloodraven if she was still alive.
>>4801979Fatman has a scat fetish in his earlier days. I think he has enough money to pay a hooker to shit in his mouth nowadays.
>>4801985You could make ratburgers.
>>4801988She could be the fire witch, but I think that the "Nettles is still alive theory" mostly applies to her flying off with a dragon and the both of them never being found by Rhanyera's faction. Thus there could be a chance that there are more dragons out in planetos if Nettle's dragon was able to produce eggs or mate with other dragons.
>>4801985That would require 5 fate points at least.Joffrey getting Boros Blount or Meryn Trant gored during a boar hunt on purpose however . . . very possible.
>>4801985Have Arys kill Mandon while Sweetrobin to seizes to death. That removes a trecherous kingsguard and a weak lord/another Baelish-aligned piece on the board. People like Preston Greenfield, Boros, and Meryn won't last long in a real fight, they'll get got soon enough.
>>4801983>Jamie is Azhor Ahai and Brienne Nissa NissaCouldn't this be backwards? Brienne kills Redemption Arc Jaime with his own sword to satisfy her honor debt to Catelyn then sort of wanders north by the power of plot to fight the Others and winds up accidentally the Night King? Keeping in mind that she is also decended from GRRM's Duncan the Tall MC and just largely fits the theme of ugly freaks and social outcasts being the real heroes along with his various on-record rants about subverting tropes where she is so often the example given.
>>4801985Except they won't be our picks, they'll be Robert and Cersei's picks again, who appointed the shit Kingsguard in the first place.
Fate Point History#1 - Granted for Archive Fuckery - Used to impale Gendry's foot.#2 - Granted for anon being a good sport - Taken away for summoning Lord Licorice due to continued archive fuckery.#3 - Granted for calling out samefag and making him delete his post - Used to find and speak with Mance Rayder#4 - Granted for being right about anti-incest anons being samefags - Expired before it could be used due to new thread#5 - Granted for sick nasty dire boar idea - Poised to be used for finding dire boars#6 - Granted for posting a funny picture which made QM laugh - Currently unused
>>4801985>while Bobby B is still king>while Sweetrobin is with some of themKek. I'm sure other anons can come up with better ideas. Unless the Danyfags take over.How about have the wrights attack Mormont when we reach the Wall and have the the old bear believe and agree with our insane wildling plan.
>>4801900>She was practicing her needlework, Lady Stark. Arya said her stitches were crooked and we were assisting her hand-eye coordination.lol
>>4802005Oh shit well if the Catelyn thing hasn't got a fate point behind itJoffrey fucks Cat and leaves a little golden haired bastard in her bellyI'm a coomer at heart, and she deserves it for shitting on Jon Snow for being a bastard all his life.
>>4802005>#4 - Granted for being right about anti-incest anons being samefags - Expired before it could be used due to new threadDidn't that one anon decide on using it on Cat? Pretty sure that was before the new thread.
>>4801900>Your daughter is a warrior, my lady. Like the Mormont women of Bear Isle or the Sand Snakes to the South or the Spearwives from Beyond the Wall. She has true potential that shouldn’t be neglected.Don't cuck out here you simps
>>4802008Agree with this, preferably in a way we can catch the wights alive. It's going to happen in a few months, we're just advancing the timeline.
>>4802011>a man can be this based
>>4802011Based coom pregnancy anon. But didn't Eddard cum in her pussy the morning before meeting us and Bobby? She should already be pregnant.
>>4802021she never showed signs of being pregnant in the booksand our lion seed will wash out Ned's weak wolf seed anyway, hentai style
Trick was the Cersei update in the last thread canon or on omake? Has it already happened or supposed to happen somewhere in the next month while we're at Winterfell?
>>4802011The planfag fears the coomerchad
>>4802005>>4802014Yea, this >>4800761 post confirms it, Trick even posted later in the same thread before creating a new one.
>>4802040if Trick confirms it I might change my fate point, but if he says it doesn't count I'm sticking to 'fuck Cat pregnant'
>>4801900>She was practicing her needlework, Lady Stark. Arya said her stitches were crooked and we were assisting her hand-eye coordination.>It was all my fault, my lady. I encouraged your daughter to pick up a sword. I accept full responsibility and submit myself to whatever punishment the North has to offer. Spank my bottom, if you must.>Your daughter is a warrior, my lady. Like the Mormont women of Bear Isle or the Sand Snakes to the South or the Spearwives from Beyond the Wall. She has true potential that shouldn’t be neglected.>I must admit, I wanted to dance with both your daughters Lady Stark. It seems Arya was far more comfortable with this style of dancing than any other, so I indulged her.
>>4802053It would be fair of Trick to do that. Either way, I appreciate you stepping up to bat for Cat anon.
>>4802040>>4802053>Two Fate points invested in fucking Catelyn StarkJesus Christ. Based>>4802060Lol anon make up your mind. You just listed all the options again.
>>4801900>>Your daughter is a warrior, my lady. Like the Mormont women of Bear Isle or the Sand Snakes to the South or the Spearwives from Beyond the Wall. She has true potential that shouldn’t be neglected.This.
>>4802061maybe if Ned fucked her right she wouldn't be such a fucking bitch
>>4802087okay so if there's already a lock on fucking Catno one else is going to like this butMya Stone comes to King's Landing to train as a warrior to become Joffrey's sworn bodyguard.fuck all of you, Mya Stone is my minor character waifu
>>4802087Based QM.>>4802053So, what's your plan with the fate point mate?
>>4802092Extremely patrician. Just a reminder that Robert in the OG timeline wanted Mya to come to KL but Cersei threatened to kill her
>>4802092I like the idea. Now we just need Darcy to come down with us.
>>4802096so we just tell Cersei if any harm comes to Mya we'll see harm comes to her or Jaime
>>4802092>inviting another one of Robert's bastards to KLNigga he sent the first one we recruited away, what makes you think he's gonna do anything different the second time around? She'd also be a shit bodyguard, she works with mules. Better to have us meet her when we go to the Vale to rip Petyr a new one.
>>4802092>Mya Stone comes to King's Landing to train as a warrior to become Joffrey's sworn bodyguard.>fuck all of you, Mya Stone is my minor character waifuHoly fucking based batman, jezus christ, umm, gonna make one small change to it though. You're going to meet Mya Stone on the WAY back to King's Landing because you pass by the Vale of Arryn. Regardless, that is such a fantastic fucking use of a fate point I'm nearly tempted to grant you another one. Jesus fuck.
>>4802107>asking for a waifu is a fantastic use of a fate pointGross.
>>4802107first based post in days>>4802114cope
>>4802114Way better use that Gendry's 'accident' lad.
>>4802114yeah but this time it's my waifu, so it's based.Your waifus are cringe.
>>4802135>yeah but this time it's my waifu, so it's based.Then give the man another fate point for being so based mate!
>>4801905>>4801910>>4802060It was all my fault, my lady. I encouraged your daughter to pick up a sword. I accept full responsibility and submit myself to whatever punishment the North has to offer. Spank my bottom, if you must>>4801910>>4801919>>4801921>>4801936>>4801967>>4801969>>4801980>>4802017>>4802060>>4802085Your daughter is a warrior, my lady. Like the Mormont women of Bear Isle or the Sand Snakes to the South or the Spearwives from Beyond the Wall. She has true potential that shouldn’t be neglected.>>4801914>>4801919>>4801933>>4801949>>4802009>>4802060She was practicing her needlework, Lady Stark. Arya said her stitches were crooked and we were assisting her hand-eye coordination.>>4801942>>4801967>>4802060I must admit, I wanted to dance with both your daughters Lady Stark. It seems Arya was far more comfortable with this style of dancing than any other, so --->>4802100You're so based I'm tempted to give you another fate point. What else do you want to do, in case the Mya Stone think doesn't happen this thread (it probably won't given how we're at nearly 400 posts over the course of a couple hours.
>>4802144Better yet, give me a fate point because I want one.
>>4802150stop giving out fate points over nothing
>>4802156Alright, after the seventh fate point, fate points will only be earned for good fanart of my quest.
>>4802156Shut up nigger.
So.. are we fucking Cat?
>>4802159Hey! I was fine with making Jamie our bottom bitch.
>>4802171Yeah but he looks like Cersei. And Cersei isn't mannish so Jaime is a twink. Fun to look at but lame to fuck.>>4802166Oh man how'd you figure that one out?
>>4802150>What else do you want to do, in case the Mya Stone think doesn't happen this threadYou know I'm tempted to throw plotfags a bone but they're kind of annoying my vibe, while the coomerfags are being coolsomeone mentioned unlocking Cersei's bisexual sidewellWe have a three way with Cat and Cersei
>>4801900>She was practicing her needlework, Lady Stark. Arya said her stitches were crooked and we were assisting her hand-eye coordination.
I'm fully prepared for this to fuck us overI don't care
>>4802165>fate points will only be earned for good fanart of my quest.shit I do draw but not wellguess I've got to try
>>4802165>only artfags get fate points>>4802175Based, though I wonder at the mechanics behind making that work.
>>4802182Don't worry, taste is subjective. And everyone's taste here is shit except mine so you have a great chance. I'm rooting for you lil guy.
>>4802165Don't have fanart but here's a meme you probably just saw.
>>4802175Choose arya over sansa
>>4802175>someone mentioned unlocking Cersei's bisexual side. . . based>We have a three way with Cat and Cerseieh, not as based - your potential was tapped after the Mya Stone thing, I see. And honestly, all you did to earn your fate point was post an image somebody else made.All in all, you got off lucky with a single fate point
>>4802194fairI was originally going to go with 'capture Val' but figured beyond the Wall stuff wasn't going to happen this thread
>>4802194>Not as basedSo who is the superior JoffXCerseiX? threesome?
>>4802196...oh?You can still use your fate point on it even if it doesn't happen this thread, just like DireBoar anon.Another alternative is getting Mormont to agree and believe us with the Other threat and the Wildling peace.
>Cat pulls us aside after whatever fedora tipping we get up to>we throw game at her, Fate intervenes>mention we want Arya to be our queen>she loves this because it's a big boost to a second daughter>oh but we wanted to fuck sansa>she looks like sansa>so what will it be? Does she want arya to be queen or not?>of course she does>COOOOOOOOM
>>4802196Why would you 'Capture' Val when we just negotiated an alliance with the wildlings? Ask her as a 'liaison' or something. A hostage for Mance to hold to his word. I'm already worried the last guy's use of his fate point to fuck Cat will get us killed.
>>4802200Now that would be a much better use of the point than anything done or suggested by far.
>>4802197Honestly, the PATRICIAN THREESOME in my head is based on /my/ SI as Robert Baratheon.So imagine Robert (me) and Cersei have been happily married for nearly two decades now.Robert matches his brother Renly up with Margaery. Now, I know Renly is gay, so, Cersei takes Margaery and starts lezzing out with her in my bedroom.I walk in to find them naked and Cersei says "Margaery needs a black-haired heir and Renly's busy right now with Loras." Then I fuck the shit out of both Cersei and Margaery, impregnating both that night - one for the first time and the other for the twelfth.
>>4802203wildling marriage, it'd make her our wildling concubine and she's a ride or die kind of bitch
>>4802209No it wouldn't. That's fucking gay lol
>>4802197Olenna of course
>>4802210>the other for the twelfth UHHHHH Based???
>>4802210Cersei x Margaery is pretty based, and in canon there'd be a lot of hot hate fucking mixed in, trying to prove who can take care of Joffrey's needs better.
>>4802028Coomers believe they have power, but they can only ruin quests if the qm is also a coomer
>>4802209Alternatively, Erectile Dysfunction to all men except us who attempts to sex Dany. Would cuck Drogo and SI Targ, and still be amusing as all hell.>>4802210Based!
>>4802203No no no, if I read his fate point correctly, it was used "getting as far as it'll take us with Cat"I don't see any explicit mention of demanding sex. Simply "as far as it'll take us" which I interpreted as what is the most reasonably positive relationship Cat could have with Joff at this point. Considering your family killed her sister and is holding her nephew hostage, well, that's not extremely far, but you have the benefit of still being a child.>>4802217She had three miscarriages and two stillbirths, but that still leaves me with seven children, each one representing a different aspect of the Seven.
>>4802225Okay now I don't want to be a big coomer if the last fate point takes us "as far as it'll take us", you >>4802211 should use yours to take us all the way.>>4802210Unbelievably based, Trick.
>>4802225Where's my FP, Trick?
I leave to take a shit and come back to this. Superb. Don't get Mya killed please.
>>4802225>each one representing a different aspect of the Seven.>not pumping kids into a hundred random chicks to have a hundred bastards then legitimizing them all and having them battle royale that shit to pick your heir>then getting married and having a non bastard child who inherits by law anyway because fuck bastards lmaoI thought you were more of an asshole than this.
>>4802229eh, I'd still rather have Mya Stone than sex with CatI'd only lock in going all the way with Cat if it used the bonus point
>>4802225It was based off of the previous conversation. He originally wanted to get some ass from Jamie. The anon's conversation started at >>4799778, if you're even interested of course.
>>4802230okay that made me laugh.Take a fate point!
>>4802238You're a benevolent god.
>>4802230>>4802238*sigh*What your plan with the fate point, anon?
>>4802238You're just bored, aren't you? That's why you're handing out these fate points like candy, so the anons come up with interesting content on their own, like a DM in a sandbox setting lets his players come up with their own plot.
>>4802244I have much to consider. I don't think it'll be a full-on coom vote, the last two have been. Maybe I'll fuck with some stuff in Essos or Dorne. I'll take suggestions, so long as they aren't brain dead.
>>4802246 . . . you're just upset you don't have a fate point yet, aren't you anon?
>>4802250As you've said before, this entire quest is one big fate point for me.
not done for a fate point, just done for fun
>>4802257Amazing. Well done anon.
>>4802257Fuck's sake mate, why're you putting me to shame like that?
>>4802249Well, there is >>4802200 and >>4802224. Some anons have floated the idea of finding dragon eggs or capturing Val. There's been some shit about glass candles, or capturing Dany directly visa Jorah Mormont, among other autism. Funniest shits gonna be the ratfags idea of making rat burgers a sensible idea, though I don't support it.Oh, and that tent flipping over revealing Loras bumming Renly.
>>4802257uhhhhhh, b-b-basedYou wanted to unlock Cersei's bisexuality, right???
>>4802005I've still got this trip, if you're willing to let me keep my point>>4799755
>>4802266All of these are bad
>>4802011For the record, I did want to put my point behind knocking up Cat
>>4802275what did you want to do with it?
>>4802267Oh dear...>>4802273What do you suggest? I see having the wights attack Mormont early or aiding the negotiations as the most sensible options with tangible benefits, which might be difficult without using the fate point.
>>4802257Based anon, never leave us.
Imagine not using your fate point to unlock boar skinchanging
>>4802266Everything but capturing Val and the ratburgers is up for consideration. Making the area around Dany a no-bone zone would be funny (and preserve the cunny) but might also cock up the Mirri Maz Dur ritual, which might mean no dragons. Not sure if I wanna take that risk.>>4802271See >>4802225
>>4802280I want her to be infatuated with us does something along >>4799833 these lines sound reasonable?
>>4802282Never letting planfags have Fate Points for one. I am perfectly fine with the entire north getting eaten by zombies.
>>4802285ah fuck, I'll think of something later I guess
>>4802287>don't worry, they'll never get past Moat Cailin
>>4802286This combined with >>4802267 this might amount to something coherent.. Two fate points ought to do it. Even if I am still extremely sceptical of using fate points on coom purposes.
Please let this happen...>>4788003
>>4802294Earn your own fate point, fuckface.
>>4802289Don't worry anon, you gave it your best shot. Not your fault Trick wasn't up for it.If you want some inspiration, >>4802266 was my poor attempt at gathering all the ideas anons came up with.>>4802285Maybe. SI Targ would shit his pants at the implications though. Keep in mind, those would be Dany's dragons, not ours.
>>4802257>>4802278By the way, the more you develop this picture, the further Cersei's bisexuality will develop. Currently, like your picture, its in a rough draft 'feeling it' stage. By the time you finish it she'll be a full blown cunt lover
>>4802301Commission some artwork.
>>4802301Didn't stop >>4802230.Will admit, >>4802257 is intimidating to try and surpass.
>>4802303Lmao. You and your tricks.
>>4802303Hmmmm, could I use my fate point to unlock Jaime's bisexuality?
>>4802314Didnt you use it on Cat already?
>>4802322I thought you were vetoing that. If you're not then nevermind
>>4802314>>4802322Combine your fate point with this anon's >>4802303 to do what you all want to, a threesome with Cat and Cersei
>>4802326I just thought you hadn't used your fate point by the end of the thread. I never vetoed anything, except arguably killing Gendry
>>4802328I don't think 2 is enough for that. We've laid a lot of the groundwork, though. Just vote for it, bros.
>>4802299>those would be Dany's dragonsI don't care who owns them so long as the ice zombies get carpet bombed by them. Using it to find more eggs for her dragons to hibernate would be good from a winning the WftD point of view, but she'd be even more powerful unless we were to marry her.
>>4802337I do care, because it'll be our ass on the line if we don't own them unless the Danyfags win the waifu wars.
>>4802343>spoilerThe only thing stopping me from assuring that is the possibility that the eggs won't hatch if I do. Think Marwyn and Melissandre could do it if they combined forces?
>>4802336Okay so are you using yours for Cat to develop an attraction towards Joffrey or for them to have the best reasonable relationship possible?
>>4802303you wouldn't rather I keep working on this Mya Stone piece?I guess I'll work on both, but you guys should know I suck at colouring
>>4802210>>4802210I was already pushing for Margaery because we need to lockdown the Reach but, fuck, now she is the superior choice for two reasons. We're already developing Cersei's bisexuality and you just know Marg would be down for it from the beginning. I will fight anyone who doesn't want to make JoffXCersaeiXMargaery happen.
>>4802335I knew you would.
>>4802355>>4802257they both need a lot of cleaning up either way.
>>4802348You can simply have them get ED while implanting the dragon egg + fire in a letter to Dany directly. That isn't too autistic, is it?
>>4802355Developing the Mya Stone piece develops my erection so keep it going.
>>4802358>knew you would.Knew I would what?
>>4802356Hey anon, we can pull a SI Trick and marry Margery to Renly while we're fucking her. Bonus points if it's after the tent flips over on Loras' and Renly's bumfuckery.
>>4802356Well, you've got my vote.Unless Robert dies really soon, in which case, Cersei is hands down the best marriage option
>>4802363ok, trick is a futa. this is canon
>>4802363I'm getting a little confused by all the fate points you're handing out, what's the status currently?
>>4802372Fate Point History#1 - Granted for Archive Fuckery - Used to impale Gendry's foot.#2 - Granted for anon being a good sport - Taken away for summoning Lord Licorice due to continued archive fuckery.#3 - Granted for calling out a samefag and making him delete his post - Used to find and speak with Mance Rayder#4 - Granted for being right about anti-incest anons being samefags - Expired before it could be used due to new thread/Utilized on “getting as far as it will take us with Cat”#5 - Granted for sick nasty dire boar idea - Poised to be used for finding dire boars#6 - Granted for posting a funny picture which made QM laugh and also being incredibly based in tastes of waifu - Poised to be used to summon Mya Stone#7 - Granted for silly stick figure drawing which made QM laugh - Currently Unused#8 - Granted for epic drawing of Joffrey Baratheon riding a boar - Used to unlock Cersei’s latent bisexuality
>>4802378Are they truly fate points? Are you a norn? Is fate an immutable force? Nah fates some gay ass dating sim about (wo)men
I really wish I worded mine more clearly. Oh well.
>>4801160uh i don't think a letter would work chief
>>4802390don't fret, anon, its already being put to good use as we speak
>>4802390It's all about technicalites nowadays. No one ever respects the spirit of a thing, you know?Sorry you wasted your fate point on account of a technicality though. Best of luck next time mate.
do you guys want Mya in Baratheon or Lannister colours?
>>4802403Baratheon colors of course.
Interposing yourself between the tomboy and her mother, you stare Lady Catelyn down with a fierce gaze, standing firm both physically and mentally as you prepare to advocate on Arya’s behalf. “Your daughter is a warrior, my lady,” you declare with confidence, earning yourself another wave of gasps from the various squires and men-at-arms filling the open courtyard, the sexists taken aback by your strange views on gender dynamics in this quasi-medieval world of fantasy. The beautiful auburn-haired mother gulps in reaction to you addressing her, nervously fidgeting ever so imperceptibly as her eyes of blue meet your emerald stare.“Like the stalwart Mormont women of Bear Isle,” you continue your impromptu speech, “or the cunning Sand Snakes of Dorne far to the South Or the unyielding spear wives from Beyond the Wall.”“Like Queen Nymeria!” Arya emphatically exclaims in addendum to your list, encouraged by your defense on her behalf. While some of the Northerners bristle and frown at your reference to wildlings and many of the Sothroners in the yard don’t know who the fuck any of you are talking about, there are enough men here knowledgable of either the Mormonts or the Dornish to understand what you’re getting at.“From North to South, East to West - there are born women meant to wield swords instead of needles and wear breastplates instead of silks. They are rare women indeed among the civilized and the highborn, but your House has been blessed with one such individual. I could feel her ferocity during our spar, Lady Stark. Arya is as much a direwolf as her four-legged companion - her swordplay lashes and bites like the claws and fangs of the very sigil stitched into her surcoat by far daintier and softer hands. Your youngest girl’s stitches are crooked because she was gifted with a dominant left hand - a terrible curse for an embroiderer but a unique boon from the Gods above for any prospective warrior. Arya has true potential, my lady, that should not be neglected.”Catelyn shivers at your bold words. “A warrior has no true purpose in times of peace, Your Grace. And a woman warrior has no suitors. I pray to the Seven that we experience peace and Summer everlasting as we have for nine long years, but even if my prayers go unheard and we are subjected to Winter and war . . . then warriors must fight and warriors die. Purposelessness or death, which fate would you have me choose for my daughter, Your Grace?”You look the Riverlander dead in the eyes. “There is no choice, Lady Stark - Winter is Coming.”The Northmen surrounding the training yard nod solemnly at your words.Catelyn nearly faints.Arya, for what it’s worth, thinks you’re fucking epic.
>>4802403Lannister. It'll feel dirty and so very right if it was in Joff's colors.
>>4802420I'm going to bed and I'll be cumming til the morrow.
>>4802420>and warriors die.Bitch everybody fucking dies. What the fuck? She think just cause you sit in a room making doilies that the mountain isn't going to YEET through the fucking wall and murderrape you?SSSSSSSSSSSSSSHIEEEEET.
>>4802420Winter is cooming
>>4802436god that's funny enough that I almost want to give you a fate point but i can't be so laissez faire with these things anymore. Sorry anon, just know you got a chuckle out of me and if the fate point price wasn't so inflated right now I'd have given you one.
>>4802420All we had to say was Winter is Coming™ and all the norfmen instantly came
>>4802420>And a woman warrior has no suitorsWhat are Greyjoys?
>>4802444Worthless pieces of shit.
>>4802444Pointless, replaceable, incompetent, de jure fuckpuppies.
>>4802440>Withholding fate points just to artificially drive up the valueHello Mr De Beers
>>4802444oooh, actually, that's another thing for my Robert Baratheon SI.14. Execute Balon, Theon goes to Winterfell, Asha is taken to King's Landing and becomes my 'salt wife' (with bisexual Cersei's permission, of course, she gets first dibs on the Greyjoy girl's body before me, it's only fair because I'm such a loyal husband and Cersei does need someone else to grieve with since Jaime perished on the walls of Pyke by that random assassin)
>>4802444Asha is mocked for her warriorness, but the fact she has two devoted orbiters kinda throws one off of that.
>>4802440This is your fate point allocation thus far. You might want to cool it for a little.
>>4802356>Margaery because we need to lockdown the Reach but, fuck, now she is the superior choice for two reasonsI'll give you the Reach point, but book!Margaery has shown no bisexual leanings. Dany has though, and she has dragons to keep the Reach in line.
>>4802456>not tripling the budgetWhat are you, some kind of Trump supporter?
I want a fate point to make Varys get his balls back
>>4802460Only his balls, not his dick.
>>4802454>>4802455So, salt wife Asha is a go then?>>4802457We'll have to ease Margery into it then.
>>4802460>>4802462And suddenly Varys might think he can take the throne. mite b cool
>>4802455Asha also has a bunch of Stannis's men, the main contender being Justin Massey, wanting her as well.
>>4801900>Dance with both your daughters Lady Stark. It seems Arya was far more comfortable with this style of dancing than any other, so I indulged her.
>>4802470Only because she's a woman and they want a lordship.
>>4802456Man, I should give you a fate point for making that pie chart.
>>4802455To be fair, that's because she's a hall pass to become a Lord Paramount of the Iron Isles in the minds of the orbiters.She's also hot, unlike Brienne.
>>4802474Do it. It'll fuck up his pie chart.
>>4802472Outside of Justin Massey yeah. Still means she has suitors
>>4802478The OCDfags will attack your nation for this.
>>4802420Well, credit where it's due Elsweyr, you have the writing chops to make stupid coomer shit read pretty darn well.
>>4802478Trick, please ban this monster
>>4802482Are you stupid or something?
>>4802484Do you usually expect answers to rhetorical questions?
>>4802484What? He's right. Elsweyr's a really good writer.
>>4802482Thank you so much. I've always been afraid to run a quest for fear of rejection. I even pretended to be a completely different person usurping the quest just to disassociate myself in case you all ended up hating it :)
>>4802487Don't encourage him. Already I'll have half my potential player base thinking I run a coomer quest with fate points involved.
i fucking love reading this retarded quest with my morning coffee.thanks to all the autists out here
>>4802489You're doing a great job, it's okay to take credit for it.
my headcannon is that trick calls them 'fate points' because the autism they bring about reminds it of fate quest
>>4801274Is he trolling? Is he serious? Either way, /pol/fags seethe. Ergo, based.
>>4802496So if he called it karma would all the redditors be triggered?Nah they've just always been called fate points. Don't worry about it.
>>4802502i know lol, but it fits so well that it just stuckand i didnt even read fatequest, so i cant judge
>>4802505I said don't fuckin worry about it don't make me get the wet socks
>>4802474It technically counts as "fanart"....
okay this is what I've got so far
>>4802512Oh hell yes!
>>4802508If a pie chart counts as fanart now, then I don't feel so bad about the moratorium on non-fanart
I like the idea of her using a warhammer like Robert
>>4802517I like it as well. It's fitting.
>>4802512Boots need a little more detail and her right foot is weird-looking.
>>4802521Anon that's a boot.
>>4802512Good, good!Now put the whole hammer in her pussy!You decide which way
>>4802522nah I get what he means, I'm working on my feet
>>4802524But you can't see the foot. It is a boot.
>>4802512Nice work Anon
>>4801211Support these shenanigans.
>>4802221This is beyond being a horny coomer idk feels more like a bunch of incels. >hates sansa>but wants to fuck cat because they hate her and also looks like sansa lol???? I can get cerseifags but seriously this need to fuck every character is pathetic.
>>4802512Oh no no no. Fatebros, the SIFags are laughing at us...
From that moment on, Arya is included among the noble children allowed to practice swordsmanship in the courtyard for the rest of your time spent at Winterfell.You recall Jon, Robb and Theon had looked absolutely fucking flabbergasted at what you managed to accomplish right then and there, spontaneously acting off the cuff in negotiating Arya out of being punished for her misbehavior and acquiring her mother’s permission to continue sparring instead of pursuing the more feminine arts with the other highborn girls. Catelyn Stark simply accepted the premise you had put forth so eloquently and surrendered to her daughter’s new path through life.With each passing day, you and the tomboy grow closer as acquaintances - Arya owing much of her ability to partake in her new hobby thanks to your efforts. What begins initially as somewhat adoring gratefulness blossoms into a quasi-friendship as she fully accepts the positive effect you have on her life. Robb, Jon and yourself take turns teaching Arya the basics of swordplay and soon enough she is outperforming Bran and Tommen due to her fierce nature and the slight advantage she possesses by virtue of being roughly two years older than both young boys.There are a lot of laughs shared between you and your new Northern friends as the days drag on and the date of your departure looms closer and closer. Interspersed between your time spent almost single mindedly focused on training your body to become the best sword fighter in Westeros and fucking Cersei, you take whatever opportunities you can find to positively influence your non-biological father’s behavior.After having noticed his heavy drinking during the welcoming feast, you remind King Robert whenever possible of the vow you made together on the Kingsroad to each day be better men and husbands than you had been the day before. Robert grumbles at your insistence - protesting irritably you’re going to shirk your duty as Crown Prince and become a septon on him, clearly unaware of your escapades with his wife - few and far between though they may be due to your encouraging of the unaware cuckold’s commitment to fidelity, despite the Queen’s clandestine conduct with a handsome blonde boy. Cersei truly is an insatiable size queen to handle Robert rutting her so frequently in the King’s bedchambers and yet still make time for you in yours without being run ragged by the rag dolling. Hopefully the sexual exercise is keeping the blonde bombshell in tip top shape.So, despite Bobby B’s willingness to relapse now that he has creature comforts and good company with which to drink and make merry as well as an old friend to share stories of the good old days with, he does not waver any further than his momentary lapse at the feast for your sake as his faithful, loyal, trueborn son.
The beastly fat man tempers his thirst for alcohol, drinking in moderation despite the stocked wine cellars full of ample vintages at Winterfell, and does not temper his sword in the waters of wet Northern pussy, clenching his fists tightly as the local bed warmers and whores of Wintertown tempt him with their feminine wiles, lining up in droves for a taste of the fabled Stag King before ending up sorely disappointed upon being ignored.The King also continues working out, doing his damnedest to shed some more of his blubber while simultaneously maintaining the immense strength naturally coiled in his hulking physique.One day, near the end of your stay at Winterfell, King Robert Baratheon tells you what you’ve been waiting to hear from him since day 1 of your life in Westeros.“We’re going boar hunting tomorrow, Joff.”This is it! This is the hunt that, in the canon timeline, allows a moment of apparent privacy for Cersei and Jaime to fuck in the Broken Tower, before getting caught by Bran, which leads to the Kingslayer yeeting that child.>BOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAR>Insist that your uncle Jaime join in the boar hunt as well. With all three of her lovers gone from Winterfell, there’s nobody with whom Cersei can get caught fucking.>Actually father, I’m feeling under the weather. I think I’ll stay behind and sit this one out. Maybe next time.>Other (write-in)
>>4802685>Insist that your uncle Jaime join in the boar hunt as well. With all three of her lovers gone from Winterfell, there’s nobody with whom Cersei can get caught fucking.>BOOOOOOOOOOAAAAARBOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAR.No yeeting kids today.
>>4802685>BOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAR>Insist that your uncle Jaime join in the boar hunt as well. With all three of her lovers gone from Winterfell, there’s nobody with whom Cersei can get caught fucking.
>>4802685>>BOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAR>>Insist that your uncle Jaime join in the boar hunt as well. With all three of her lovers gone from Winterfell, there’s nobody with whom Cersei can get caught fucking.
>>4802685>BOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAR>Insist that your uncle Jaime join in the boar hunt as well. With all three of her lovers gone from Winterfell, there’s nobody with whom Cersei can get caught fucking.BOAR! BOAR! BOAR! BOAR! BOAR!
>>4802685The power of the direBOAR compels you >>BOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAR>>Insist that your uncle Jaime join in the boar hunt as well. With all three of her lovers gone from Winterfell, there’s nobody with whom Cersei can get caught fucking.
>inb4 Cersei gets caught with Catelyn, exploring her bisexual desires, but nobody even realizes what's going on because of homophobia
>>4802724>Inb4 she cripples Bran just because "she felt like it"
what a coincidence, I'm working on this
>>4802685>>4802685 #BOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAR? Maybe?>Insist that your uncle Jaime join in the boar hunt as well. With all three of her lovers gone from Winterfell, there’s nobody with whom Cersei can get caught fucking.
>>4802730All according to Keikaku
>>4802685...Elsweyr QM !Tx0QgjVrt. (ID: ZPRtsSAV)05/11/21(Tue)18:33:22 No.480268538 KB38 KB JPGThe beastly fat man tempers his thirst for alcohol, drinking in moderation despite the stocked wine cellars full of ample vintages at Winterfell, and does not temper his sword in the waters of wet Northern pussy, clenching his fists tightly as the local bed warmers and whores of Wintertown tempt him with their feminine wiles, lining up in droves for a taste of the fabled Stag King before ending up sorely disappointed upon being ignored.The King also continues working out, doing his damnedest to shed some more of his blubber while simultaneously maintaining the immense strength naturally coiled in his hulking physique.One day, near the end of your stay at Winterfell, King Robert Baratheon tells you what you’ve been waiting to hear from him since day 1 of your life in Westeros.“We’re going boar hunting tomorrow, Joff.”This is it! This is the hunt that, in the canon timeline, allows a moment of apparent privacy for Cersei and Jaime to fuck in the Broken Tower, before getting caught by Bran, which leads to the Kingslayer yeeting that child.>BOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAR>Insist that your uncle Jaime join in the boar hunt as well. With all three of her lovers gone from Winterfell, there’s nobody with whom Cersei can get caught fucking.
>>4802685>>Insist that your uncle Jaime join in the boar hunt as well. With all three of her lovers gone from Winterfell, there’s nobody with whom Cersei can get caught fucking.
>>4802685>BOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAR>Insist that your uncle Jaime join in the boar hunt as well. With all three of her lovers gone from Winterfell, there’s nobody with whom Cersei can get caught fucking.We have to remember to tell Cersei that under no circumstances is she to kill the Stark's direwolves. I don't want to be dealing with missing direpups in our future lads.
>>4801100then i fuck a lot of bitches
>>4802776Why would she do that? It was only Joff throwing a tantrum about getting attacked that made her go all ATF, without our input she'll have no interest in them whatsoever.
>>4802783Insurance. I don't want a 'Gendry' pulled over our heads while we're not there to mitigate any screw ups that happen.I could just be paranoid though.
in colour but keep in mind I suck at colouringworking on it though
>>4802789I'll keep working on this through the weekit gets me practicing at least
>>4802789Noice, Based Anon!
sex SEX SEXXXXXXXXXXXXX
>>4802789>Joffrey "The Golden BOOOAARR" Baratheon
>>4802789Really makes me wish we'd spent a fate point turning the DIRE BOAR into warg-style companion.
>>4802799We could still train the boar, especially if a dire boar, to be a decent war mount.Apart from jokes, it'd be unique, setting us apart and emphatizing even more that us, as the (future) King, are above the rest (as in unique)
>>4802685>DOUBLE Insurance! We take Jamie and all of the Stark boys plus Arya!
Can me please destroy Dhorne once we are king? Cant stand them
>>4802832No no no, only coomer stuff is allowed.
AAAAAHMURDERED BY A BOARA GREAT BIG HAIRY WHORE
>>4802365I knew you would cuck on Gendry. It was obvious when you gave me the point and then immediately went into the fate thread going, "I'm sooo sowwwy guys," that you would cuck again even on a minor character. Just like how you skim the Cersei fucking to appease the whiners. You just want everyone to like you so badly.
>>4802872>You just want everyone to like you so badly.lmao wat
>>4802884Just ignore that faggot, he's projecting onto Trick, crying about how he was cucked on his fate point and wanting everybody to like him for calling down Lord Licorice like the bitch he is.
>>4802884Not you obviously. You're too triggered by his low effort baiting, though even that does appeal to the majority. Aside from that he's a total noncommital fence sitter.
>>4802891if you didn't exptect vote rigger to cuck you, that's on you
>>4802897Just said I did expect it. Hard to be mad about my expections being met. At least I riled up plenty of fanboys when they were getting so worked up waiting for it to drop.
>>4802891I'm thoroughly confused, Trick.
>>4802899Wait, he seriously gone apologize to fatefag thread? Wow, what a bitch.
>>4802902You are mind-numbingly stupid for someone with as many autistic plans as you have.
>>4802907Within minutes of awarding me the fate point. Kinda pathetic. So yeah, you could say I didn't exactly have high expectations on his willingness to upset the fanboy tribe. This whole dumb troll persona is just a front for being a total cuck.
>>4802911Oh, you're not Trick. The tripcode threw me off.
>vote rigger qm
What the fuck is going on and why is the QM arguing with himself? What does fatefaggotry have to do with any of this?
>>4802872>Still seething about Gendry not being dead even though you, and I and everyone in every thread knew that it was done out of spite specifically towards noblebrightfags>Hurr I knew you weren't going to do it QM, you didn't agree with my dumb spite vote so therefore you stoopid teehee. I have never seen someone so overly obsessed about one random bastard of Robert. This is even worse than Redwynefags shilling for a glorified npc girl. Cope, your fatepoint choice was so retarded that it was the only one QM vetoed.
>>4802952Blue Elsewyr was some random dude who was obsessed with killing off Gendry probably so he can have gay sex with his corpse several threads ago, and he's still obsessed to this day.
>pepeposting and infantile insultsAnd I'm the one seething. Still a little riled up are we? Lol. Found the ratburgers.
>>4802978We're not gonna have sex with Gendry's corpse like you want fag, let it go and go suck Renly's cock instead.
>>4802789Very good draw anon
Alright gang, I've narrowed down what I want to use my point on to two options.>Option OneUpon our return to King's Landing, we spot a ship in the harbor that looks rather worse for wear. It's Gerion Lannister, returned from Valyria with two VS swords (one is Brightroar), a glass candle, a dragon egg, and a book on how to use those last two things.The issues here are that it doesn't really do much more than give us neat shit to play with and an egg to MAYBE hatch. It'd make Tyrion and Jaime happy though, Gerion was their favorite uncle.>Option TwoOn the night of her wedding, Ser Jorah takes Dany, the eggs, and her (maybe) SI brother and successfuly escapes the city on a ship bound to King's Landing.Problems here are that while we get two of the "three" Targs and three eggs (and Dany hasn't been DOTHRAKI'D), they're just paperweights at this point. Melissandre would cream herself if we tell her we know about her prophecy of awakening dragons from stone though, so she'd definitely help. And Viserys could provide the kingsblood for that ritual too.
>>4803002Option2 is interesting if done well. But how would we get the Dragon Eggs. Would Jorah and Dany join us or something?
>>4803002I'm not sure Trick would allow either of those with just one fate point. Let's see what he says about these options.
>>4803002Option 1. As much as I want Gerion to be a plague lord him coming home would make Tywin smile, and I want to see it. Use your fate point here friend. >>4802685Thank you qm for making the dreams of the boarchads coming true. >BOOOOOAAAAAAR> Bring Jamie to prevent defenestration of Bran blah blah blahI really only want Jamie to come to see how he reacts to the dire boar. The puns will be glorious.
>>4803002 That seems pretty powerful for what fate points have done so far, but the second one looks more interesting.
>>4803010As an addendum to option 2, it'd be in pursuit of a pardon and shit. Maybe he could join the Kingsguard so we could continue to cuck him.>>4803017Fate point economy is something rarely discussed. We'll see, I suppose>>4803021>Tywin smilingNot for all the fate points in the world.
>>4803002>Gerion LannisterFuck, if he shows with any ONE of those things (Brightroar being the most reasonable/desirable, honestly), that would be a huge change to history. For one, the house of Lannister would have a potential line of succession that does not involve the Imp. And as much as I love Tyrion, Tywin would name Gerion as his heir over him in a heartbeat.
>>4803031He'd apoint Tyrion as his own heir just for the sheer chadliness of it.
>>4803027His smiles were reserved for his waifu after all. I like option 2 in that case, I want to see Varys panic and slip up because his FAegon plan is getting ruined. Anger issues FAegon Sue is someone who must never sit the throne.
>>4803031Also Tywin has a living brother, but Tyrion is still the current heir, even if Tywin assumes Jaime will be dismissed from the KG.>>4803035>FAegon Sue is someone who must never sit on the throneThis is very true.
>>4803002First one. Second requires you to either commit some robbery, murder, or both. There's no way Robert would keep a living Targaryen anywhere near him, and to get brownie points you'd probably have to volunteer to do it yourself.
>>4803038Fuck, forgot about Kevan.
>>4803039We've made Robert all the more reasonable by fueling his redemption arc. Confronting him with a Targ would be a test for him, one I think we could talk him into passing.>>4803040Everyone always does. Poor Kevan.
>>4803042This is assuming he can get over the sheer rage of his cuckoldry. If there's anything that will probably never change, it's that King Buck the Cuck will never let it go. The only way he might is if he inadvertently cucks ElesJoff by fucking Dany, which we've made impossible or at least very hard without fucking up everything we've worked for.
>>4803002The return of Gerion Lannister would be brilliant.
>>4803031Yeah. I also like 1 the most because I felt the story wasnt pursued and was another one GRRM loose ends that is just never brought up.It would be so fucking cool. Plus imagine the girls who would line up to see the dragon egg.
>>4803044>This is assuming he can get over the sheer rage of his cuckoldry.Point out him cucking Cersei repeatedly and her (seeming) lack of retaliation. That should guilt him.
>>4803049I am going to make one last plea for option one.Forget Clegane bowl.We get a fucking ghost of a chance at dragon bowl z. Think about it. A gold and red dragon or perhaps some dragon with stag like antlers ridden by us or Bobby B against Dany on Drogon.
>>4803065Where will you get the King's Blood for hatching the stone egg? Robert's not going to let you burn any of his bastards. Melisandre is also on Stannis' side. How will we do the ritual without any knowledge?
>>4803049You're assuming logic, Robert, and Targaryens can ever coexist without a "not", "no", and "can't" being somewhere in-between them.
>>4803068We do have Ned with us though, who'll also demand they not be killed. Combined with our support, Barristan's, and Tyrion and Pycelle's if we tell them to back us, that's almost the entirety of the Small Council begging Robert not to kill them. He might acquiesce.
>>4803066Balon Greyjoy was a king, once. And he needs killing, too.
>>4803066>Melisandre is also on Stannis' side.Melisandre is only with Mannis because she wants so badly to be right about the Azor Ahai. If we mention birthing dragons from stone, she'll join us after a change of smallclothes.
>>4803073It was in my initial plan to convince Melisandre by telling her we know about the slave Melony of Lot Seven, sold to the temple of the Red God. But we decided to delay recruiting her until she kills Renly for Stannis.
>>4803066Does it have to be a fatal amount for the ritual? I forget.
>>4803084Only death can pay for life.
Jaime is totally gonna murder Robert here, isn't he?
>>4803091Nah the BOOOARR will distract him.
>>4803091Someone should use a fate point to get jaime killed by a direboar before he can stab bobby b
>>4803066Lannisters WERE Kings during time of Andals and during time of the First Men. It's only been less than 300 years of that not being the case. Furthermore, just about every major noble house older than 300 years tends to be related to a house that at one point called themselves king, not to mention the ungodly amount of bastards sired by both the kings and their own children.King's Blood is common as gasoline in Westeros.
>>4803094So who are you gonna burn?
>>4803066Assuming our Lannister blood is too far removed, we have Jon now.
>>4803091i don t consider him that dumb, there will be plenty of people. It s the king going hunting not a lord with a small retinue.We should bring Tommen with us to the wall, so he can start training with us and we can better bond. Also we can start sparring with Sandor on the road is time.For the pet gift, maybe we will find more than one direboar pup ?
>>4803090Ok Maester AmonOne of Rhagars Bastards that may existDarkstar (maybe?)VisyersFAegon>>4803094This might work
>>4803097Honestly? You probably don't need to burn anyone, but if you ABSOLUTELY must burn someone, let it be Ramsay, he's got blood of the Red Kings and is actually a fucking criminal, seeing he almost certainly killed off his own brother. Hell, Roose is as well for practicing first night against crown law. There's probably a metric fuckton of criminals in Westeros who have some degree of Kingsblood without even knowing about it.Of course, could be you don't even need Kingsblood. You probably just need to make it look like you burned someone alive who was legitimate, hell probably don't even need to burn them, just need to make a big enough show of it for it to make people believe it's a magic ritual. Ritual Magic in ASOIAF is 99% showmanship that relies on people's suspension of disbelief for it to actually happen.
>>4803066Varys the potential Blackfyre is sitting around, and it's not like Mirri Mazz Durr the fucking rando had any Kings blood. Drogo was also already dead.
>>4803103>AemonNo, he's cool>Rhaegar's bastardsNever heard of them.>DarkstarI'd be shocked if we could subdue him>ViserysSure>FAegonSure>Other optionsWait for Balon to rebel again and use him.>>4803109Bunch of theories about how that ritual worked, I recommend Glidus' videos about it.
>>4803109Honestly, if we take a look at probabilities of being born related to a King in the TEN THOUSAND YEARS OF HISTORY in Westeros, as opposed to about 1000 years since Charlemagne and just about Everyone of European descent being distantly related to Charlemagne as well as some other Kings, you can probably pick off literally ANY hobo from the street and he likely has blood of Kings in some quantity.Especially since goddamn first night was a thing for about 9700 years in history of Westeros.
>>4803109>>4803107Dragon Bowl Z sounds like it can happen more and more.I am more for a dire boar mount desu. BUTUncle Tyrion dreamt of dragons. If anyone deserves the fucking mount its him. And Gerion would likely give it to him.
>>4803114>Bunch of theories about how that ritual worked, I recommend Glidus' videos about it.That is true, and I've heard of them, but it's also important to note that Varys' blood was important enough for him to be singled out for a sacrifice. He's probably a surer choice than most because he's already been shown to have succeeded in being good bait.
>>4803002I’ve been waiting for someone to use a fate point to bring Gerion back.
>>4803119This is why my idea of using the Boar and then getting it to Dragon tier like whatever the Great Empire of the Dawn did to Fire Lizards should be the unironic goal of this quest.
Considering we're a prince with access to tremendous quantities of wealth and influence, why don't we just buy some enchanted equipment from Asshai?
>>4802971>qm doesnt keep his wordDefend that however you want
>>4803124Yeah. Varys as a sacrifice seems good.>>4803129Unironically agree. Having gone boar hunting before i was a mad lad enough to use a recurve bow. and knowing how intelligent and fierce they are, a big fuck off boar mount would be awesome.
>>4803136The Throne is 6 million dragons in debt.
>>4803142OY VEY!! NOT THE SIX GORILLION SHEKELS!
The Boar Knight!
>>4803146>Trick: REEEEE NAZI NAZI I'M GONNA RIG THE VOTE AGAIN, FUCK YOU REEEEE
>>4803146Uh oh we got a nazi here boys, tranny is gonna spaz out again
>>4803161>Can the fatepoint be used to guarantee that we find a DIREBOAR piglet?
>>4803151We should attach spikes to our battle hog's tusks, dire boar > FAegon elephants.
>>4803161Do whatever the fuck you want. lmao Trick should post that smut about Sansa if he has balls.
>>4802724"Bran, honey, mommy and the nice blonde lady were just 'wrestling'. That's all.">>4802789Oh god, with a drawing that good Cersei is seriously considering 'catching and eating the Fish' if you know what I mean.>>4802872>then immediately went into the fate thread going, "I'm sooo sowwwy guys,"When did I do that???>>4802915No seriously. I haven't gone into the fate thread since like, thread 1 of this quest??? I've gone into the /qtg/ before, but never to apologize to the fatefags.>>4803138The guy asked to use his fate point to impale Gendry, Gendry was impaled. I kept my word.
>>4803170He has cognitive dissonance and made up a false scenario because he still can't cope with the fact that Gendry is alive lol
You've been at Winterfell for roughly three weeks now. Is there anything you'd like to do before the boar hunt that I've neglected to allow?>Write-in
>>4803170>Oh god, with a drawing that good Cersei is seriously considering 'catching and eating the Fish' if you know what I mean.This is hilarious, Cersei is getting fucked by 3 different guys and still goes, what if I had more, but different? Completely in character.
>>4803178Rob the crypts.
>>4803178Explore the crypts for anything interesting. We've been friendly enough to the Stark kids and already earned their favor for the most part.
>>4803178Because you copped out on showing us fucking Cersei, we need to fuck her in the hot springs of Winterfell. Once in a lifetime opportunity.
>>4803182fine, fuck it. Give me an hour or two.
>>4803183Do it from a different ID so you don't get tagged for ERP.
>>4803161I agree, lets shit this quest up as much as possible
>>4803178Explore the crypts and talk with jamie.As well do preparations for the boar hunt, ask tips from anyone that knows about it.