OH SHIT NIGGA, you are SHOTASNIFFER. Eldest daughter of the skeleton villain LOLISNIFFER. After a long and arduous succesion war against your siblings, you now claim ownership of your family's island, as the leader of the UNITED SHOTA SNIFFING REPULIC. From here, you shall spread your skeletal power accross the globe and dominate the world!Currently you're in the middle of having your soldiers kidnap some kid genius CEO of a robotics company, everything seems fine so far. Your men nabbed the kid and are trying to make their escape!
Rolled 14 (1d100)>>4407544They don't, because it turns out the other villains disguised themselves as the guards.
Rolled 70 (1d100)>>4407544RUN YA DOLTS!!!On rocket roller blades
Rolled 58 (1d100)>>4407551Rocket roller blades? Do we even have that?Roll 2d100 to see if we have that
Rolled 21, 93 = 114 (2d100)>>4407554
>>4407555Oh hey we do
Rolled 12 (1d100)>>4407563WATCH OUT FOR THAT NINJA
>>4407564OH SHIT A SHURIKEN
Rolled 51 (1d100)>>4407563DOOOODDDDGGGGEEEE
Rolled 35 (1d100)>>4407570WAIT, WERE THOSE "GUARDS" VILLAINS>>4407571
Rolled 11 (1d100)>>4407570Dodge ninja style!!!
Rolled 93 (1d100)>>4407571ROLL 2d100 TO COMPLETE THE QTE
Rolled 80, 90 = 170 (2d100)>>4407585I can't do this alone
>>4407591>off by 3fug
Rolled 70, 78 = 148 (2d100)>>4407585
>>4407591FUCk
Rolled 95 (1d100)>>4407638Wait, how the hell did they get here so fast->Guards take off their masks to reveal their identity as conspiracy
Rolled 38 (1d100)>>4407638NIBBA RUN!!! AFTER THOSE HELMETS!!!
>>4407641"THE CYBER NINJAS?! HOW ARE THEY HERE?!""I THOUGHT WE KEPT THEM OCCUPIED!""DOESN'T MATTER NOW! GET THAT KID!"
Rolled 98 (1d100)>>4407665Wave hello to the conspiracy people.
>>4407668"AND WHO THE HELL ARE THESE SKELETONS"
Rolled 74 (1d100)>>4407690AND WHY IS THERE LOUD CHANTING
Rolled 32 (1d100)>>4407690RUN AFTER THE NINJA DUDES WHO STOLE THE KID GENIUS
Rolled 63 (1d100)>>4407690We are the undead branch.
>>4407694At which point a wall explodes and minions of the ancient spirit of darkness bursts forth, yelling some weird ancient ritual chant in some long forgotten language nobody here knows
Rolled 98 (1d100)>>4407703throw some shit at them to shut em up
Rolled 12 (1d100)>>4407703Realize that maybe the skeletons/conspiracy dudes might make good allies.
Rolled 43 (1d100)>>4407708Roll 2d100 to throw grenades at em
Rolled 17, 77 = 94 (2d100)>>4407728BOOM
Rolled 42, 59 = 101 (2d100)>>4407728
>>4407734Atop the USSR War Blimp, Shotasniffer observes that things are going increasingly tits up by the minute. With all these factions around trying to get the kid, it's total chaos down there. Your men have started throwing grenades around, blowing the fuck out of the area. This forced the ninja holding the kid to jump around dodging explosions and unable to escape. Which is good. But if that kid dies in the crossfire, this whole thing would have been a waste
Rolled 68 (1d100)>>4407740Clearly we need to go down there ourselves to secure the kid within our loving embrace.
Rolled 11 (1d100)>>4407740Eye the big red button
Rolled 15 (1d100)>>4407740If you wanna do something right, do it yourself!
>>4407744Mighty suspicious line
Rolled 48 (1d100)>>4407753>>4407751Jump down from the blimp and land right in the middle of the enemy formations with a giant shockwave!
Rolled 60 (1d100)>>4407753There is nothing suspicious>>4407755>>4407751
Rolled 58 (1d100)>>4407753jump bitch jump!!!
Rolled 19 (1d100)>>4407756Roll 2d100 with a +40 bonus!
Rolled 2, 68 = 70 (2d100)>>4407762Right onto the head of an enemy for style points
Rolled 30 (1d100)>>4407762>autowinFINALLY WE USE THE GREAT LEADER IN BATTLE
>>4407766>>4407768
Rolled 80 (1d100)>>4407778START BEATING UP THE NINJAS, CONSPIRACY NIGGAS AND THE POWER RANGERS
Rolled 10 (1d100)>>4407778All the enemies start fucking panicking>>4407781
>>4407783+1
Rolled 81 (1d100)>>4407781"Ah fuck"ROLL 2d100+40 bonus
Rolled 35, 72 = 107 (2d100)>>4407791URAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
Rolled 21, 7 + 40 = 68 (2d100 + 40)>>4407791
>>4407793Much yelling and pain ensued
Rolled 19 (1d100)>>4407804Turns out the prodigy is a Shotasniffer fanboy
Rolled 80 (1d100)>>4407804>>4407805
Rolled 22 (1d100)>>4407806IS IT? IS IT TRUE THAT THE KID TURNS OUT TO BE A FANBOI?Roll 2d100
Rolled 53 (1d100)>>4407814OF COURSE HE IS
Rolled 80, 29 = 109 (2d100)>>4407814
>>44078172d100 man, he didn't give the bonus
>>4407820i meant to do 2d100 but then you rolled goodit's aight
Rolled 70, 41 = 111 (2d100)>>4407814
Rolled 27, 37 = 64 (2d100)>>4407814
>>4407819"I..I-is that....the great heroine Shotasniffer! She must have come to save me! YES! I won't even have to summon the mech squadron now!""the fuck are you mumbling about"
Rolled 52 (1d100)>>4407842RESCUE BOY GENIUS FROM NINJA DUDE
Rolled 97 (1d100)>>4407842Ninja gets a good look...."oh">>4407847
Rolled 96 (1d100)>>4407849"...I should have stayed home today"ROLL 2d100+40 bonus!
Rolled 88, 70 = 158 (2d100)>>4407860URAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
>>4407863uragh indeed
>>4407863Good thing the kid's all starry eyed and is too engrossed in looking at you to register the potential trauma all this violence would give him
Rolled 100 (1d100)>>4407882Now, grab the kid and let's get the fuck outta here
Rolled 25 (1d100)>>4407882Meanwhile the ninja leader and the conspiracy leader hide out to escape her wrathturns out they're the other two bozos from the kidnap target list
>>4407883>100first. whoasecond, do you really want shotasniffer being near, let alone HOLDING a little boy
>>4407882Nah, kids are desensitized to violence these days. I blame the Bible and its violent imagery.
Rolled 100 (1d100)>>4407884>>4407883Not mutually exclusive.>>4407882Both these things.
>>4407891NICE 100 BRO
>>4407883>>4407891._.
>>4407891>another 100what the
>>4407883>>4407891
Rolled 61 (1d100)>>4407896I guess we're kidnapping the ninja and conspiracy leader now too
Rolled 67 (1d100)>>4407896Do this secret meeting thing first, we'll settle shotasniffer's pedo urges later
>>4407899Shotasniffer grabs the kid, rappels up alongside the USSR troops to the blimp and heads back to the island as the enemies scatter. THEN,SWOOSH, TRANSITIONMUCH LATER, AT A SECRET LOCATION...
Rolled 50 (1d100)>>4407906"THIS WAS YOUR FAULT!""FUCK YOU""THE GREAT EVIL SPIRIT BLAMES THE BOTH OF YOU! PREPARE TO BE CUR...""SHADDUP, YOU'RE TO BLAME TOO!"
>>4407908well they seems to be getting along fine
Rolled 71 (1d100)>>4407915"Goddamnit, that girl and her siblings just wiped out most of our presence from the city. The others will really not be happy."
Rolled 97 (1d100)>>4407915>>4407919
Stop trying to generate another plot hook niggers
>>4407921"The others are also fucking dead. The vampire mafia's been eliminated ""Those bloodsuckers are gone? Goddamnit, Those guys helped control my casinos""THIS IS WHY YOU MORTALS ARE INFERIOR""Shut the fuck up, ancient evil stuck in a tube""THIS TUBE IS MERELY A TEMPORARY ARRANGEMENT, YOU SHUT UP"
Rolled 50 (1d100)>>4407938Now, back to Skeleton Island, we've finished with all of our missions; time for a grand meeting ourselves
Rolled 47 (1d100)>>4407938The bank is fucking kaput, the secret kaiju project we funded turned up in smoked, the convoy's been destroyed, the museum we told that viking to rob turned up empty, this villain conspiracy to kill Lolisniffer and his mother is going to fail
Bottom - mouthUp - eyes
>>4407944they're his fingers, duh
>>4407942"Boy. They're coming back. Better reserve the resort's convention hall for our meeting. Wonder if Bobby's okay"
Rolled 2 (1d100)>>4407956Ivankov told me he's fine, he's just meeting the natives right now.
Rolled 33 (1d100)>>4407956Did Bobby finally get help from Captain Ivanov?
>>4407958Yes. And they had an entire big underwater adventure.Offscreen.Anyway, it's 4AM so I gotta sleep for work in the morning. So uh. We're done for now, will continue, I dunno. Same time tonight. Or tomorrow. Who knows. See yaupdates b here: https://twitter.com/notapaladin
>>4407964by adventure they mean "we waited until he started yelling curse words constantly and then went down to pull him up while apologizing to the fishmen"
>>4407964noice bred
>>4407964kk thanks for the session nigga.
>>4407964Toodle-oo.>>4407891Lol I posted right before my phone died and just got to see this now.
Why is Chosen One called Chosen One?
>>4408736Because he was Chosen
10 hours
where's that OP
>>4409153Probably hacking your account right now.
Much apologies. I blacked out when I got home last night. When I came to it was already too late
>>4409830It's all good.
>>4409830np
>Shotasniffer now has two shotas in custodyWelp, time to rev up the ol' porn engine
Scrub scrub
Rolled 6 (1d100)>>4411893Do you ever question why we do this?
>>4411898I mean, if you dont scrub them glasses, it's gonna get dirty
Rolled 29 (1d100)>>4411901I guess that makes sense.
Rolled 4 (1d100)>>4411901Gotta maintain your rep as not the worst skeleton sibling after allAlso check on marian
>>4411902Das right
Rolled 1 (1d100)>>4411909Well, time to see if we can let Marian out
Rolled 4 (1d100)>>4411909Anyway lets switch to something interesting.
>>4411912Depends on your definition of interesting
Rolled 16 (1d100)>>4411918Training arc sounds fun.
Rolled 26 (1d100)>>4411918man we are playing chapters nowTraining first
>>4411922"Alright Alt Betty. Time for your first day of training.""So what're we doing?""Punch that mountain in half"
Rolled 20 (1d100)>>4411935"what"
Rolled 69 (1d100)>>4411935vertically or horizontally
>>4411938"Either works. Let's see what you can do right now"
Rolled 57 (1d100)>>4411944imagine the most punchable face that you hate on the mountainso the other betty
>>4411945
Rolled 68 (1d100)>>4411948PUNCH IT
Rolled 86 (1d100)>>4411948Punch THROUGH it! Climb to the top and jump up to let gravity guide your fist.
Rolled 90 (1d100)>>4411951"That's one way to do it! Focus your power into your fist and strike at the center point, Alt Betty!"You gotta make him call you something other than Alt Betty. Since from your perspective, the other Betty's the Alt.Anyway roll 2d100 against the mountainMountain has +20 bonus
Rolled 58, 92 = 150 (2d100)>>4411954>autoloseimaginary betty laughs at you
>>4411956
Rolled 46 (1d100)>>4411959Get enraged and slap the mountain
Rolled 100 (1d100)>>4411959Are you going to take this lying down? Punch her from the top!
Rolled 51 (1d100)>>4411964"Try again! Alt Betty!" Rasputin yells from belowRoll 2d100 to try again+20 for the mountain
Rolled 53, 78 = 131 (2d100)>>4411972
>>4411975With your rage, you punched the mountaintop, creating a huge crack right down the middle. It's not EXACTLY splitting it in half, but it's a start
Rolled 29 (1d100)>>4411981Can't wait to punch the shit out of that Betty when she comes back
>>4411984"Now now, Alt Betty. Are you training in this school to actually better yourself? Or for revenge?"
Rolled 69 (1d100)>>4411989Better myself, clearly, yeah
Rolled 100 (1d100)>>4411989Why not both.png
>>4411990"You sure? You're definitely not holding onto a WHITE HOT RAGE inside your soul? Something that seethes and burns inside of you that pushes you to obtain more power? You have no desire to enact your vengeance against Betty for putting you through such shame and humiliation?!"
Rolled 94 (1d100)>>4412007no, definitely not, mr rasputin, no sir
Rolled 70 (1d100)>>4412007Dude chill, I know revenge is a motivation but that's too intense
Rolled 100 (1d100)>>4412007No.
>>4412015"Shame. Woulda made for good motivation. Now let's move to the training arena. We'll work on your stances and forms"
Rolled 61 (1d100)>>4412019okcut to marian finally being let out of the box
Rolled 22 (1d100)>>4412019Okay.
>>4412021"Whaat?! Really?! Then am i forgiven?"
Rolled 21 (1d100)>>4412033Nah, sis just wants a meeting and you still are technically a major sibling
Rolled 5 (1d100)>>4412033Haha you were pranked, Get back in.
>>4412036"...w-well better than nothing I guess"
Rolled 68 (1d100)>>4412045Besides, we need that space for Bobby
Rolled 58 (1d100)>>4412045Lets check on a random character of OP's choosing.
>>4412047"WHAT?!"
Rolled 80 (1d100)>>4412055get innow to the reunion
>>4412057"BUT I DIDN"T EVEN DO ANYYYTHIIIIIiiinnnngggg......." Bobby yells gets smaller and smaller as he is dragged away
Rolled 17 (1d100)>>4412065now for the reunion
Rolled 86 (1d100)>>4412065Lets check on a random character.
>>4412071>>4412073We shall move onto the reunion by checking in on one of the character.....tomorrow. Feeling kinda under the weather right now. Going home in the rain was a bad idea. So uh, much sorry. But gotta stop it here. Continue sometime later.updates will be posted here: https://twitter.com/notapaladin
>>4412078Don't get the 'vid.
OP may or may not be dead
>>4413399Wot about undead?
7 hours have passed
>>4415250Dawn of the final day
Alright, where's OP
12 hours have passed.
>>4415299>>4415588them post numbers... mmmmmmm...
4
OP must be dead
I'm holding OP hostage at an undisclosed location. If you ever want to see OP alive again, you'll pay me twelve million dollars. Otherwise, say goodbye.
Fucking ass, power went out again. Finally i ahve internet access
Rolled 21 (1d100)>>4416229Are you dead tho
Rolled 36 (1d100)>>4416229>>4416233
>>4416233Perhaps
Rolled 27 (1d100)>>4416236but wasn't life without internet beautifulso much free time
Rolled 46 (1d100)>>4416236Alright lets see that reunion
Rolled 5 (1d100)>>4416236>>4416239should we roll for our character pov
>>4416239"Ivanov?! The hell are you wearing?""I'm a captain now, bro"
Rolled 13 (1d100)>>4416244Chosen One hopes everyone else has done something villainous.Before the news comes up
Rolled 4 (1d100)>>4416244triangular hat is not in a vein of ussrchange it on appropirate ushanka
>>4416246"Breaking News. The famed hero Shotasniffer has saved the CEO of MechTech from a villain attack"
Rolled 49 (1d100)>>4416254"wha-"more breaking news
Rolled 5 (1d100)>>4416254goddammit, check the other news
>>4416255"In other news. A bank famous for its terrible business practices and bloodsucking tactics have been robbed. Nobody mourned its loss as Armored Soldiers dressing up like their LARPing DnD attacked the building and cleared out its vaults. There's also reports of a government official using the bank as his stash of blackmail material, The robbers left the vault open, allowing the police to collect evidence of his crimes. It's as if this was their true goal all along, whoever these blue clad knights are, they must be heroes"
Rolled 21 (1d100)>>4416260hit the barwe need vodka to deal with this shituntil it's too late.
Rolled 1 (1d100)>>4416260>>4416261 as news continues
>>4416261"Quattro! Vodka! Now!""Geez man, sure. Lemme get a glass""No! Just gimme the whole bottle! Preferably several ones!""wat"
Rolled 70 (1d100)>>4416270do it, Quattrohe wouldn't ask without a good reasonget a whole box of bottles
Rolled 10 (1d100)>>4416270>>4416271More news
>>4416271
Rolled 89 (1d100)>>4416277>>4416273
Rolled 91 (1d100)>>4416277looking at all this Quattro thinks that relying on alcohol is a bad thing and will be way more moderate with it consumptioncause jesus christ
>>4416279YOu know how sometimes, when you do a thing, and you dont really get how bad it could be, until you see someone else do the exact same thing and get some actual perspective on how bad it was you were being.Quattro is having one of those moments.
Rolled 63 (1d100)>>4416280deepand then he hears the news himself
>>4416281"More great news! A terrible monster was defeated today by a green skeletal heroine! Believed to be related to the great heroine Shotasniffer!"
Rolled 88 (1d100)>>4416284And more...
Rolled 54 (1d100)>>4416284at least there is no dojo news, right?
>>4416285"Another report of possibly the same Blue-clad Knights attacking a convoy transporting more of the bank's ill gotten gains. Huzzah!"
Rolled 69 (1d100)>>4416289>>4416286
Rolled 96 (1d100)>>4416289Quattro loses it and chimps out
Rolled 21 (1d100)>>4416289it's time to just start skeleton sentai group
>>4416291"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA---"
Rolled 75 (1d100)>>4416295BETTY, TERRIBLE NEWS , EVERYTHING WE-News about the hero responsible for knocking out Alt-Betty plays
Rolled 93 (1d100)>>4416295Betty being best girl and MVP as usual.What would Quattro do without her.Truly the invaluable character in series.Should be protagonist honestly.(pls betty forgive me, I won't drink anymore)
>>4416298"Shut it Quattro. Now where's Rasputin at? I wanna show him my new belt"
Rolled 3 (1d100)>>4416299point in direction of split mountain near dojo and tell that he personally trains alt-betty
Rolled 81 (1d100)>>4416299Should be in the Dojo, which is advertised right now
>>4416301"Yeah, I saw the commercial. Why isn't he here now though?"
Rolled 56 (1d100)>>4416303Said something about training alt-Betty and that I should not mention that to you.oh wait
Rolled 28 (1d100)>>4416303Probably in training, best to wait until the meeting we're holding right now
>>4416304"He's doing what"
Rolled 59 (1d100)>>4416308ermdid I tell you that this coat suits you?*heavy sweating*
>>4416309"Quattro. Big brother. My dear, sweet, Quattro. What is our brother, Rasputin, is doing again? Now, you wouldn't lie to your sweet little sister, would you, dear brother?"
Rolled 45 (1d100)>>4416313resist spilling the beansrasputin is your bro
Rolled 46 (1d100)>>4416313All I can say is that we found a girl in yellow clothing who looks the same as you among the trainees and he has taken an interest in training her...please don't use the belt
Rolled 61 (1d100)>>4416313"He's training me, the REAL Betty" comes a voice from the doorwayDramatic confrontations is go
>>4416316"And where is this training taking place, then?"
Rolled 47 (1d100)>>4416327resist, Quattrofor your broresist!man she is cute nowterrifyingly so
Rolled 67 (1d100)>>4416327I don't know.
Rolled 62 (1d100)>>4416327All I know is that he does the one-to-one training with her..he doesn't tell anyone except his best students where
Rolled 18 (1d100)>>4416330"Is that so?"Quick, Quattro! Roll 2d100!
Rolled 10, 7 = 17 (2d100)>>4416334yeeeeees?
Rolled 40, 2 = 42 (2d100)>>4416334No, really, I don't, don't hurt me
Rolled 36, 82 = 118 (2d100)>>4416334Sis no
Rolled 83, 49 = 132 (2d100)>>4416334Okay dokie.
>>4416338"...Alright. I believe you. For now. I'll be heading over to the dojo if anybody needs me. See ya, Quattro"
Rolled 48 (1d100)>>4416344More news
Rolled 94 (1d100)>>4416344Lets get back to the news.
Rolled 89 (1d100)>>4416344>turns out Quattro really didn't know
>>4416346"In other news, for the past week the city has been embroiled in a bloody gang war, but since Friday, the violence has seemed to stop. It is still unknown what happened, either the gangs have killed themselves off or somebody won"
Rolled 17 (1d100)>>4416354and more news
Rolled 53 (1d100)>>4416354but check out these new sausage joints tho
Rolled 43 (1d100)>>4416354Neat, now lets check on somebody of you choosing op.
Rolled 39 (1d100)>>4416354Seeing as everyone's just wandering back on the island now we should debrief the news in a more orderly fashionShotasniffer summons her principal acolytes to that moodily-lit room in the Kremlin to work out what loot was scored during their missions and what can be rebuilt (or otherwise done) with it
>>4416356"In completely unrelated news, a new chain of restaurants have opened in our great city! Sausages of the Round Table is proud to sponsor this news segment! Come on down and try some! THey're criminally delicious!"
Rolled 74 (1d100)>>4416363Also, there was something about a museum
Rolled 32 (1d100)>>4416363deliciousnot all news are bad, see?
>>4416364"Closing off this newsweek, the City's Museum been attacked by the Villain known as The Raider. It is believed he has stolen various precious artifacts from the vault as he escaped. Citizens are advised to stay safe and report all sightings to the police or the nearest Hero League representative"
Rolled 97 (1d100)>>4416369Okay so how about everyone heads Kremlinward and reports in to Shotasniffer so she can work out how much of the island we can afford to rebuild, with some sort of dice-rollingAnd then also pick from a list of options for what to do next with the other cool stuff we got
Rolled 57 (1d100)>>4416369I miss spaghetti arc
>>4416371There's spaghetti in the Kremlin
>>4416373A lot of spaghetti to go around really
Rolled 65 (1d100)>>4416373no, that's soviet macaroni po flotsky
>>4416370Yes, let's move to the secret command center
Rolled 32 (1d100)>>4416377...uh, so we're pretty much screwed
Rolled 31 (1d100)>>4416377put carpet on a wall for authentic feel
Rolled 77 (1d100)>>4416377Shits fecked.
Rolled 40 (1d100)>>4416377"Why is there a young human boy chained and gagged in the corner?""...It adds to the ambiance."
>>4416378Explain
Rolled 93 (1d100)>>4416386Have you checked the news recently
Rolled 2 (1d100)>>4416386Marian is missing again.
Rolled 23 (1d100)>>4416386Well half the island's still in ruinsAnd probably even more people think we're heroes now
>>4416387Of course, you have checked the news. The whole hero reputation is indeed a huge setback. But surely your siblings have managed to at least bring home the resources for the island rebuilding, right?
Rolled 59 (1d100)>>4416392Well, yeah, but that thing is minor compared to what Dad would do to us if he comes back.
Rolled 23 (1d100)>>4416392Right. Take inventory of new resources n shit
Rolled 36 (1d100)>>4416394>ifyou are not thinking he will lose, do you?
>>4416399It is his mom he's fighting
>>4416394Let's hope he and grandma take a long time to sort things out then
Rolled 49 (1d100)>>4416402we can always lie that we infiltrated the heroes society to destroy it from with in, right?
Rolled 9 (1d100)>>4416402The other good news is that the former VP finally has a name...Ken
Rolled 41 (1d100)>>4416402Facepalm harderAlso count up the loots, ill-gotten gains etc.
>>4416404Of course. We could do that. But best not think about that now, let's go over what your siblings have done. Disregarding the whole hero thing, naturally
Rolled 72 (1d100)>>4416409look at summary of the earnings in nifty powerpoint presentation former VP Ken got us done
>>4416412oooh, nifty...
>>4416413with use of WordArt to boot!just don't ask what contents of that folder named "spaghetti" is on desktop
>>4416412
Rolled 58 (1d100)>>4416416now further breakdown into specificswhich artifacts we got which can be distributed for usage for sake of powerboost
Rolled 57 (1d100)>>4416416"Wait, his name was Ken all along?"
>>4416418"Well I got this cool sword for starters. Kinda suck at using it tho"
Rolled 5 (1d100)>>4416427And what else.
Rolled 100 (1d100)>>4416427Putting the random magic whatsits aside for now:How much cash did we get, including the cash we're gonna get from selling the non-interesting artifacts, and what can we get done with it?
>>4416429"Well, we got...."Roll 2d100Second roll determines how much cash:1-30: Barely enough to cover island repairs31-75: Enough to completely repair the island76-95: Enough for repairs with a little bit extra96-100: Shitload of cash, more than enough for repairs and personal spending
Rolled 92, 66 = 158 (2d100)>>4416431URAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
Rolled 43 (1d100)>>4416431Okay.
Rolled 20, 84 = 104 (2d100)>>4416431
>>4416432>66Oof, that's pretty, pretty bad. You only got JUST enough to repair most of the damages but not everything? Surely you can roll better
Rolled 72 (1d100)>>4416440>31-75: Enough to completely repair the islandThat isn't EVERYTHING repaired? Does that mean we get a reroll?
Rolled 73 (1d100)>>4416440>31-75: Enough to completely repair the islandOP come on
Rolled 39, 67 = 106 (2d100)>>4416440Maybe
>>4416442OP sits upon a throne of lies
Rolled 36 (1d100)>>4416445That's gobbunism for ya :DDDDD
Rolled 59 (1d100)>>4416445OP gets beaten up while Ken continues.Also everyone just found out Ken is his name
Rolled 66 (1d100)>>4416445But does it have badass lighting like Shotasniffer's throne?No. So it's no throne at all.Your shitty lie throne is itself a lie. Hurry up and give anons all your money.
>>4416449"Anyway, we have enough cash to completely repair the damages done by the robocalypse""Thank you Ken, anything else?""HIS NAME'S KEN?"
Rolled 98 (1d100)>>4416452Marian is missing.
Rolled 67 (1d100)>>4416452Let's get an indepth review of the artifacts we grabbed. Also, Ken you look good with that sword, I should enroll you in a Kendo class.
>>4416454not again
Rolled 59 (1d100)>>4416452We forgot to include Bobby's loot.>>4416454Related?
>>4416454"WHAT?!""uh yeah, we were, uh, switching out Marian for Bobby in the cage""And he kinda, uh, slinked off somewhere"
>>4416455Why not make it a gunblade instead, so he can use his gun skills with it.
Rolled 8 (1d100)>>4416461Everyone panic.
Rolled 64 (1d100)>>4416461to drink with the Chosen One, who is completely drunk
Rolled 24 (1d100)>>4416461YELL SO LOUDLY THAT EVEN MARIAN WILL BE ABLE TO HEAR IT"MARRRRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!"
Rolled 75 (1d100)>>4416461Make sure his credit cards and accounts AREN'T frozen so we can track him with them
Rolled 84 (1d100)>>4416461while red alert going on at all station and panic ensues cause goddammit Marian, no one notices glimpse of Ken's wallpaper with new girl from museum, when he closes powerpoint before disconnecting laptop from projector
Rolled 84 (1d100)>>4416461Just put a mech figurine in a box trap, that oughta get him out of his hidey hole
Rolled 77 (1d100)>>4416461And by slinked off, we mean launched himself into low earth orbit in some kind of spaceship
>>4416467
Rolled 7 (1d100)>>4416476uh oh
Rolled 20 (1d100)>>4416476You didn't know he had a name, Director...um what was your name?
Rolled 97 (1d100)>>4416476So... you've finally found a girlfriend, huh.
Rolled 11 (1d100)>>4416476Lets check on bobby.
>>4416479As the room panics over Marian's disappearance. And Ken panics over what The Director saw. The door bursts open and Luke saunters in with his gaggle of criminal underlings
Rolled 36 (1d100)>>4416488he also picked up Marian on the way here, and stuffed him with sausages
Rolled 32 (1d100)>>4416488>>4416489Also Director asks Ken what's her name
>>4416489"Yeah I found him hiding in a bush outside for some reason"
Rolled 31 (1d100)>>4416492Good job, now we...have...ev...ery...one....Where's Lilly?
Rolled 25 (1d100)>>4416492>>4416493indeed, where's Lilly?I hope she doesn't take a bad influence from Luke now that he's a badass gang leader
Rolled 49 (1d100)>>4416492Panic stopsLuke gives update on his doing, but we kinda figured that out already
>>4416494yeah she might end up drive-by wienering
>>4416493"Oh she's here. She's just short""nyyyyyeeeeeeh"
Rolled 28 (1d100)>>4416502Meanwhile, Director asks Ken that if he really does [CENSORED] her, what's her name
Rolled 2 (1d100)>>4416502So, now that we have the money to rebuild everything. It's time for us to FINALLY do that space mission. Marian, you have one job and that is to supervise it.
Rolled 86 (1d100)>>4416503>>4416502come on, they didn't hold hands, that's illegal
Rolled 5 (1d100)>>4416502Director offers to turn Kens sword into a gunblade.
>>4416506"Also Lilly asks for a souvenir"
>>4416520did anyone bring any?
Rolled 99 (1d100)>>4416520give her that swordseems Ken isn't going to need itWhat is the director's name anyway
Rolled 18 (1d100)>>4416520Ken, that sword of yours could be a good gift for Lilly!
Rolled 58 (1d100)>>4416520>>4416521
>>4416522"GUYS! HELP! STOP....[insert Director's name here]"
Rolled 44 (1d100)>>4416530Jeanne!
Rolled 17 (1d100)>>4416530roll for random name
>>4416532"...JEANNE!"
Rolled 41 (1d100)>>4416543Lilly wants souvenir from everyone tho.
Rolled 60 (1d100)>>4416543Break up the fight between Jeanne and Ken. This is no time for infighting. Also give Lilly Ken's sword from the museum.
Rolled 17 (1d100)>>4416543I'm sure you can handle it, where are the souvenirs?
>>4416546"This is cool and all but I'm not a weeb tho"
Rolled 64 (1d100)>>4416550Isn't it a Viking sword
Rolled 90 (1d100)>>4416550Who here is an actual weeb that wants a sword then? We could make it into a gun blade for you, Ken.
Rolled 95 (1d100)>>4416550Luke got her something more of her taste found in some gang stashes - old classic armor from certain vampire related story
Rolled 93 (1d100)>>4416552>>4416550
>>4416554>"And it's not even the only armor I found"
Rolled 42 (1d100)>>4416567Man, look at Lilly go hugging Lukeso happy
Rolled 99 (1d100)>>4416567>>4416568Now, to the moon mission, with the boy CEO who decided to follow us wanting to help his idol
>>4416569I'm thinking we get the boy genius to help us make Equality Prime V2
>>4416568
Rolled 90 (1d100)>>4416577>>4416573
>>4416577aw yeahthose were the times
>>4416579
Rolled 41 (1d100)>>4416583Wait, you like mechs?
Rolled 49 (1d100)>>4416583We could make unique mechs for each color now. So even Quattro could have one if he wants. >>4416584Nah she just likes smashing them, I think.
Rolled 34 (1d100)>>4416583and they all lived happily ever after>>4416584mechs is just an armor but bigof course she doesshe even has cybuster figure
>>4416580My man why are you using the Thumbnail version
>>4416585"Nah we're good""I just like smashing 'em""Lilly's new sword is looking pretty peculiar though, I gotta take a look at that later"
Rolled 33 (1d100)>>4416589You mean the sword that's constantly whispering about how we have to defeat the great evil incoming?
Rolled 74 (1d100)>>4416589Alright, Marian. You will be in charge of the moon mission as its commander. I'm gonna trust you to not fuck it up. ROLL TO INTIMIDATE
Rolled 15 (1d100)>>4416580finally found one I wanted>>4416588I have it, just accidentaly there is thumbnail ver in same folder>>4416591bad idea>>4416589Watsup Quattro, got a souvenir too?
>>4416591you're trusting MARIAN with it after all this time?
>>4416589Jeanne takes Kens sword to make it a gunblade in the background.
Rolled 49 (1d100)>>4416598>>4416589Not being a weeb, she makes it a gun that shoots the blade.
>>4416597Sending him on a suicide mission is a good way to redeem Marian.
>>4416600Everyone is going on the moon mission
>>4416591"Yeah uh I kinda agree with anon >>4416597 here""You really wanna put Marian in charge of, practically ANYTHING, after what he's done?"
Rolled 73 (1d100)>>4416605yeah, let's notI'll not trust him my coffee machine, not talking about space missionBut questions standswho is going to be responsible for space mission tho?
Rolled 57 (1d100)>>4416605>>4416606
Rolled 21 (1d100)>>4416605Poor Marian, always getting shafted.Would we get a bonus if he was assigned to the moon mission?
Rolled 85 (1d100)>>4416605Nah, put him in Gay Baby Jail for a week, then have President and Director figure out what to do with him
>>4416610The moon mission is a main plotline, besides, if it were a suicide mission, we would be sending Bobby
thinking back on it, that build up resulting in fucking nothing with Gar was amazingSasuga dice god.I never larped that hard before and since
>>4416611
>>4416613Too bad the sequels weren't good
Rolled 38 (1d100)>>4416614This is what happens when you escape Marian, now wait a week or we will put you in the gay zone proper
Rolled 95 (1d100)>>4416614Do a jig.
Rolled 94 (1d100)>>4416614Just tie him up and have Ken and Jeanne drag him along while the little boy CEO does the work building the ship
Rolled 95 (1d100)>>4416615yea, sequels tend to be like thatlike civ quest for example>>4416614just put him under home arrest instead, give him something to do, like develop addicting videogames for sale to humans
>>4416615What sequels
>>4416617
>>4416622Super Robot 3
Rolled 98 (1d100)>>4416624depends on quality of a jig
Rolled 45 (1d100)>>4416624Maybe.
Rolled 72 (1d100)>>4416624Prove yourself, Marian.
>>4416625That has nothing to do with Vampire hunters!
Rolled 78 (1d100)>>4416631>vampire hunters was going for so long I forgot it didn't have sequelman that was longest quest.Is it still being downloaded like crazy?
Rolled 69 (1d100)>>4416627Quick, Marian! Roll 2d100 to not fuck this up!The jig has a +40 difficulty >>4416632By chinese bots probably. Still don't know why
Rolled 40, 1 = 41 (2d100)>>4416633>69nice
Rolled 67, 59 = 126 (2d100)>>4416633GOD DAMMIT
Rolled 97, 57 = 154 (2d100)>>4416633>autolossI expected nothing less>By chinese bots probably. Still don't know whybiggest mystery of today's world
>>4416634>>4416635>>4416636
Rolled 92 (1d100)>>4416639can we retry with [PERMANENT WAVES]
Rolled 44 (1d100)>>4416639seems like you still need some time to reflect upon you actions, Marian
>>4416640Oh hey somebody remembered Marian used to have the power to steal rolls and retry events
Rolled 22 (1d100)>>4416651ain't you glad Marian
Rolled 81 (1d100)>>4416651CAN HE DO IT??
>>4416653Then maybe the Mechapocalypse can also be retried and steal rolls....hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
Rolled 51 (1d100)>>4416655Begone clippy, we killed you already
Rolled 98 (1d100)>>4416655we don't have budget for that, OP
Rolled 69 (1d100)>>4416657Yeah that's true. Roll 2d100 again+40 difficultyBut no roll stealing, Marian aint feeling well enough to regain that power yet
Rolled 6, 23 = 29 (2d100)>>4416659>69>same autoloss againmeanwhile at dice god place
Rolled 25, 45 = 70 (2d100)>>4416659Okay.
Rolled 71, 95 = 166 (2d100)>>4416659>69 AGAINGet into the zebra cell
Rolled 40 (1d100)>>4416659Marian will learn from his mistakes, hopefullywith all this punishment we're giving him
Such is life for Marian
Rolled 56 (1d100)>>4416681Get back to the moon mission which is also planned separately by the three villains + the viking
Rolled 18 (1d100)>>4416681Now, about that moon mission..
Rolled 100 (1d100)>>4416681his soul is weighed by the gravity
>>4416685"Alright, first thing first. Sis! Why the moon?"
Rolled 70 (1d100)>>4416697despite being late, dice god confrims>>4416699free real estatealso overall big achievement to not be persecuted by father when he gets back
Rolled 19 (1d100)>>4416699Having a moon base is a contingency plan in case things go south and we unleash nuclear war upon the world. Plus, space is cool.
Rolled 6 (1d100)>>4416699It's to set up our base and >>4416701
>>4416701"Oh alright"
Rolled 22 (1d100)>>4416712Besides, not like anyone else is going to take it
Rolled 40 (1d100)>>4416712any more questions?
>>4416714MEANWHILE"Now that damn kid's under the protection of those infernal skeletons. This complicates things""He's gonna be free to make even more mechs to combat our plans""THEN LET'S GO TO THE MOON YOU FUCKS""what"
Rolled 9 (1d100)>>4416729how is that kid is doing anywaystill unmolestedahem I mean friendly with Shotasniffer?
Rolled 46 (1d100)>>4416731>>4416729Let's get that kid to make us Equality Prime V2 since Marian is currently locked up. And with an AI that won't lead to robopocalypse AGAIN.
>>4416732"Of course, Ma'am! Anything for you!"
Rolled 13 (1d100)>>4416746Shotasniffer not used to this
Rolled 46 (1d100)>>4416746Now, let's scroll through the Equality Prime V2 choices
Rolled 12 (1d100)>>4416746Lets check on Rasputin.
Rolled 44 (1d100)>>4416746Boy gives him the stinkeye
Rolled 13 (1d100)>>4416748they will all look like shotasniffermaybe with boob missiles
Rolled 5 (1d100)>>4416755Well, since it's boy genius designing it this time. Hopefully we get some new designs that aren't coombrain tier
>>4416758genius and being in puberty and also a huge fanwhat can possibly go wrong
>>4416748What? Like right now? We dont have the budget for that yet!
Rolled 27 (1d100)>>4416762outtabudgeto shotasniffer ver here we go
Rolled 98 (1d100)>>4416762Aw come on, OPthat guy who likes super robots is hereyou gonna disappoint him like that?
Rolled 92 (1d100)>>4416762Like, art budget or actual budget
>>4416764
>>4416764aw>>4416770well I deserve it since I never followed up on that fanart promise
Rolled 23 (1d100)>>4416770well, if we don't have budget for mechs right now; surely we have budget for a space ship
Rolled 26 (1d100)>>4416770Anyway, turns out those guys were the rest of the conspiracy Simon and Shadowboss Jr were part of
Rolled 19 (1d100)>>4416770>>4416773this
Anyway, since I'm lazy as fuck and also tired. Just google search mechs that you think should be what Equality Prime V2 should look like and I'll shit em up into our options the next time thread continues, eh? Eyyyyyyyyy.Yeah.So updates be here, as always: https://twitter.com/notapaladinNow please, do my work for me
>>4416777yeah okay, thanks for bread, OP
>>4416777donethanks for bread, OPtake care
>>4416777No.https://www.toymana.com/products/55491 with Equality Prime's head to avoid copyright
>>4416777
>>4416984> Twig thighs.There was an old arcade game where you piloted mecha in 1v1 combat, it used two joysticks for L/R independent thrust.Anyways it had a tiddymecha that I originally tried to find for this. It had a heart beam attack.But I couldn't find it. If anyone knows what I'm talking about though I would appreciate the name of the game.
>>4416984I do actually really like these designs, too tho.
>>4417045Virtual On?
>>4417846Oh shit yes. Dude, so many memories of playing that game at the local arcade in the bar by the movie theatre downtown as a kid.
>>4418000Nice
>>4418013This made my day remembering this and watching youtube playthroughs. It was awesome, back in the day of 1998 having the characters have completely tactics due to the unique weapons + the added dimenson of being able to jump up and shoot over obstacles, as well as different firing rates plus the maneuverability letting you "lag" shots to fire around corners.Can't speak for later versions, but apparently there is a ps4 game so I guess I'm getting that.
>>4416777I don't mind what the main mech looks like, but: it should have two smaller automated mechs inside it, shaped like the noble proletarians in pic related, that can launch out and use their hammer and sickle to beat up enemies
>>4418247Or we should have a mech for every sibling and that can combine into the new Commie Mech.That way we won't have to worry about it getting taken over again.
>>4418389Are we going the super sentai route now
>>4418394We already have a colour coded team.
>>4418394>>4418427With very marketable themes and aesthetics.
>>4418006Excellent choice.
Rolled 8 (1d100)>>4416777ayo where's OP it's been 2 hours
>>4419828Who? I dunno whatchu talking about
Rolled 69 (1d100)>>4419837take off the groucho outfit, OP
>>4419839OP who? Who's OP?
Rolled 8 (1d100)>>4419849OP gets run over by a truck carrying a fridge
Rolled 40 (1d100)>>4419849why are you sweating weird communist man
Rolled 11 (1d100)>>4419849very handsome and generous individual of great valuealso loves dogs
>>4419851UH, the weather, yea
Rolled 92 (1d100)>>4419858let the dogs out
Rolled 94 (1d100)>>4419858Chosen One takes the mask off OP for himself
>>4419862What mask?! And who's OP?! Stop this nonsense!
Rolled 90 (1d100)>>4419870Threaten to beat up "Not OP" if he keeps delaying
Rolled 75 (1d100)>>4419870OP is just stalling for giant robot list, need to come up with outtabudgetto variants to make it seem like there is a choice
>>4419871But i've done nothing wrong
Rolled 50 (1d100)>>4419881Beat him up anyway
Rolled 50 (1d100)>>4419881>>4419883
Rolled 96 (1d100)>>4419881sweat makes glasses fall cause decreased friction
Rolled 11 (1d100)>>4419883Roll 2d100 to assault this completely innocent stranger
Rolled 50, 98 = 148 (2d100)>>4419896
Rolled 30, 3 = 33 (2d100)>>4419896my captcha is fucked todayeither way it's too latehave a good bread OP
>>4419900
Rolled 93 (1d100)>>4419906WHERE'S THE GIANT ROBOTS, OP?
Rolled 10 (1d100)>>4419906>>4419907>OP loads Super Robot Pilot Season 4 PV
>>4419907I dunno whatchut talkin about
Rolled 25 (1d100)>>4419917where the hell is all our budgetdidn't you have two days to do these, OP
Rolled 64 (1d100)>>44199175th one
Rolled 22 (1d100)>>4419917look at that budgetglorious low poly
>>4419918I ate the budget, i was hongry
Rolled 98 (1d100)>>4419921at least not horny
Rolled 42 (1d100)>>4419917I'ma go with my pick, 3rd one
>>4419924Of course
Rolled 99 (1d100)>>4419931>>4419919
Rolled 75 (1d100)>>4419931therefore the first onewhich isn't compensating with gun size at all
Rolled 28 (1d100)>>4419931TOP RIGHT HOLD UPGET THE BUDGET NIGGA
>>4419932hmmmmmmmmmmmmm
Rolled 11 (1d100)>>4419937>>4419935
Rolled 56 (1d100)>>4419937TOP RIGHT LET US SEE IT WITH BUDGET
Rolled 39 (1d100)>>4419937what is that button on top right do
>>4419940ye ok
Rolled 85 (1d100)>>4419942outabudgetto under 4it's by a kidwhat do you expect
Rolled 87 (1d100)>>4419942damn, this is a hard choicelet's go with #6 cause it's got the sword
Shit forgot the color layer for the 1st one
Rolled 59, 12 = 71 (2d100)>>4419942still 5
Rolled 42 (1d100)>>44199424 and 1 mixed together.
Rolled 91 (1d100)>>4419948>>4419946
Rolled 70 (1d100)>>4419948are those skulls licensed by punisher comic book?
Rolled 10 (1d100)>>4419948>>4419949
>>4419951Hah fucking weeb
Rolled 54 (1d100)>>4419957aren't half of these choices weeb though, OP
Rolled 86 (1d100)>>4419957we all arecan we have mass produced version of 1 for troops?
Rolled 18 (1d100)>>4419957>>4419958
>>4419958yes
Rolled 41 (1d100)>>4419961and you liked them yourself ain't you
Rolled 40 (1d100)>>4419961>>4419959
Rolled 51 (1d100)>>4419961>>4419959
Rolled 52 (1d100)>>4419961Lets make 4 our new model for constriction robots..
>>4419964
Rolled 36 (1d100)>>4419967What does that mean.
>>4419967wat
Rolled 69 (1d100)>>4419967lock in>>4419966
Rolled 77 (1d100)>>4419967Alright, lock in
Rolled 67 (1d100)>>4419967>>4419969
>>4419971Alright, you have chosen to give OP all your money. Thanks.
Rolled 61 (1d100)>>4419977Okay back to story.
Rolled 80 (1d100)>>4419977OP gets beaten up by Chosen One again as he wants to vent his frustration
Rolled 43 (1d100)Now, back to the main plot. I recall a moon mission?
>>4419980
Rolled 38 (1d100)>>4419986Story time jackass.
Rolled 79 (1d100)>>4419986>>4419981>>4419979
Rolled 96 (1d100)>>4419986Now back to moon mission
>>4419992After ordering the boy genius to tale the design with the sword and wild hair, you go back to the moon mission plans"What exactly IS our plan?"
Rolled 94 (1d100)>>4420008Make rocket go moon.
Rolled 70 (1d100)>>4420008Let's setup a moon base and exploit the natural resources!>>4420010also yeah, rocket go moon
Rolled 43 (1d100)>>4420008We were supposed to have a space shuttle built for us to go to the moon, conquer it, and build a base so that we can extend our influence to the stars.And hopefully gain forgiveness from our father
>>4420010"Do we have enough resource to make one? And also resources to build the moon base when we get there? We've only just had enough to completely repair the island"
Rolled 13 (1d100)>>4420028You know what. How about I just press this big red button?
Rolled 55 (1d100)>>4420028We steal resource the make rocket.
Rolled 63 (1d100)>>4420028Oh, we can use our influence over boy genius to get him to 'generously' donate resources to us.
Rolled 85 (1d100)>>4420028We could always take resources from Marian.
>>4420037"The GSG's funds are already being used to maintain the island while we were out getting the resources to fix it. Dunno if it's enough"
Rolled 90 (1d100)>>4420045Steal time.
Rolled 58 (1d100)>>4420045>>4420036
Rolled 55 (1d100)>>4420045>>4420036
Rolled 46 (1d100)>>4420047Roll 2d100 to steal time Time has a +50 bonus
Rolled 17, 17 = 34 (2d100)>>4420061TOKI WO TOMARE
Rolled 16, 45 = 61 (2d100)>>4420061Okay.
Rolled 90, 38 = 128 (2d100)>>4420061Bah.
>>4420065Unfortunately, you couldn't steal time itself. Chronomancy has eluded you once again.
Rolled 16 (1d100)>>4420069>>4420036
Rolled 90 (1d100)>>4420069>>4420036
Rolled 29 (1d100)>>4420072Yeah probably, roll 2d100 for it
Rolled 81, 36 = 117 (2d100)>>4420079Okay.
>>4420079>>4420080nice roll
>>4420082Why?
>>4420080"o-of course! I'll gladly donate to your cause, ma'am!'
Rolled 98 (1d100)>>4420097Now, let's check on Rasputin and Betty and Betty.
>>4420099Rasputin and Alt betty is still in the middle of training
Rolled 79 (1d100)>>4420115Our Betty is gonna get jealous that Alt-Betty is getting training from Rasputin.
Rolled 64 (1d100)>>4420115Let check on Marian and bobby.
>>4420117
Rolled 34 (1d100)>>4420124Rasputin does what any sensible teacher would do and tell Betty and Alt-Betty to settle their differences in the ring!
>>4420127"Of course! I train you both, so fight eachother! I'll gauge your abilities and change the training regime accordingly! Surely this is the perfect solution with no possibility of a drawback"
Rolled 79 (1d100)>>4420136inb4 half the island goes up in flamesIt'll be fine™
>>4420138Worst case scenario, Rasputin will just let them go at him at the same time. That'll keep them contained! Anyway, it's 2:30 AM and I am sleepy. We'll continue later. See yacheck here 4 them updateS: https://twitter.com/notapaladin
>>4420144See ya, OPNext time, we're going to space thanks to generous donation from boy genius
>>4420144Thanks baby, *mwuah*, you were fantastic.
Rolled 57 (1d100)>>4420144where's OP, it's been 4 hours
>>4423256Op is a myth.
Rolled 44 (1d100)>>4423286Hehe funny skeleton.
Rolled 11 (1d100)>>4423286intermission of the adventures of simon and greg happens
>>4423287
Rolled 38 (1d100)>>4423301Let's see what Marian is up to.
Rolled 66 (1d100)>>4423301Anyway whats on todays fun menu.
Rolled 55 (1d100)>>4423301intermission of what other people are doing before the main plot continues
>>4423304
Rolled 80 (1d100)>>4423312Clearly the real answer is to check on what Simon is doing
Rolled 15 (1d100)>>4423312Destroy the HDD.
Rolled 10 (1d100)if I roll 100 - manlet rider will do a cameo
>>4423314"ARE YA WINNING, SIMON?"
Rolled 26 (1d100)>>4423324"MAYBE"
Rolled 57 (1d100)>>4423324come on greg, the plan to find your brothers isn't until tomorrow
Rolled 52 (1d100)>>4423324No.
>>4423328"Oh okay then, I'll leave you to your...activities then"
Rolled 63 (1d100)>>4423338we're still going to jojo's house with the fridge to try and summon them right
Rolled 94 (1d100)>>4423338Lets make more robots.
>>4423342"Robots? Since when do we rely on robots?"
Rolled 84 (1d100)>>4423348Since our island got mega fucked.
>>4423350"What island? We don't own an island. Simon are you high"
Rolled 74 (1d100)>>4423355Wait, Lolisniffer never told you?
Rolled 93 (1d100)>>4423355Im not Simon, Its me yah grandpa.
>>4423361"Alright, you are high. I'll just leave you to it then"
Rolled 38 (1d100)>>4423367The diversion worked, Time to watch hentai.
Rolled 62 (1d100)>>4423367The fridge moans
>>4423370"Huh....what a weird fridge.....Oh well"
Rolled 12 (1d100)>>4423373Let's continue the main story with Shotasniffer now.
>>4423375Not much to do now but wait til construction's completed
Rolled 96 (1d100)>>4423383What are some things we can do in the mean time?
Rolled 80 (1d100)>>4423383Are we bringing everyone
Rolled 41 (1d100)>>4423383Lets try to steal time again.
>>4423384
Rolled 17 (1d100)>>4423389check on any sibling that isn't a disappointment
Rolled 16 (1d100)>>4423389>>4423392Yeah, good time for bonding
Rolled 88 (1d100)>>4423389Punch concrete.
>>4423392Oh then anybody that's not Quattro, Marian or Bobby then?
Rolled 22 (1d100)>>4423402Yes
Rolled 73 (1d100)>>4423402Quattro has proven himself not so much of a disappointment compared to Marian at least.Let's check on Lilly.
>>4423404Lilly's doing her homework
Rolled 7 (1d100)>>4423414Good god that's a lot
Rolled 14 (1d100)>>4423414DO A SUDDEN ROLL FOR AN EVENT
Rolled 41 (1d100)>>4423414Ask her if she wants to punch some concrete.
>>4423419Roll 1d100.Time to bust out the old Skeleton Island criteria for rolls again1-5: Very Hard Event, Very substantial Rewards if successful but harsh consequences if failure6-20: Hard Event, substantial Rewards if successful but bad consequences if failure21-50: Easy Event, low rewards51-70: Medium Event, Medium Rewards71-89: Hard Event, Substantial Rewards90-100: Very Hard Event, Very Substantial Rewards if successful, bad consequences if failure, but not that bad....Lowest gets picked
Rolled 42 (1d100)let's get the lowest roll possibleURAH!
Rolled 100 (1d100)>>4423423Okay.
>>4423426>>4423424aw fuck, lowest gets picked
>>4423424Olessa comes up to you and strikes up a conversation to pass the time while Lilly's work on her assignments. Eventually, during the small talk, she produces a box"Hey sis, during the raid on the vault, I found this locked box. Couldn't get it to open, maybe you could try?"
Rolled 24 (1d100)>>4423433Does it have an opening with a keyhole in it?
>>4423436"None that I can find"
Rolled 29 (1d100)>>4423441Just crack it open with our fist
Rolled 12 (1d100)>>4423443Roll 2d100+50 bonus
Rolled 77 (1d100)>>4423454oh fuc>>4423426where you at nigga
>>4423459Breaking the box open, you found some gold coins inside. They're not even particularly rare coins either, should fetch a decent price but nowhere near enough for a fortune. Whoever put them in there must have done so for sentimental values more than material. Probably a gift from a relative or something.
Rolled 88 (1d100)>>4423463This has the Kingdom crest on it. Is there anything on the back side?
>>4423464
Rolled 4 (1d100)>>4423470Looks like a bunch of gibberish at this distance
>>4423471Indeed it does......Oh well.
Rolled 43 (1d100)>>4423477Let's start a Pony farm on the island.
>>4423480Yeah sure. But maybe do that after the moon mission. Can't spread our resources too thin, after all
Rolled 34 (1d100)>>4423482... check on alt-betty
>>4423484The fight is still going on. Both sides are using martial arts alongside dirty tactics to attempt to gain the advantage over the other
Rolled 97 (1d100)>>4423497Maybe we can get an event from Rasputin. Like finding an ancient scroll with forbidden martial arts or something.
Rolled 40 (1d100)>>4423498Well, it's late and there's nobody here but you, anon. roll for it before we suspend the thread for tomorrow's nightRoll 1d100
Rolled 43 (1d100)>>4423507Okay.
>>4423507>>4423510I blame this anon for being afk for an hour
>>4423511I was getting some lunch.
>>4423510As the two Betty(s) fought, they messed up the training grounds, eventually kicking up enough dirt that Rasputin's Demon Mask picked up traces of a hidden chamber, buried underground and warded from prying eyes. Stepping in between the two girls, Rasputin stops the fight to direct their attention to the locked hatch, now revealed. It seems dad has hidden more secrets on this island than he lets on.Oh well, that's it for tonight, it's 3.:30 AM and I gotta go to work in the morning, see ya all next time this continues.Updates b here as always: https://twitter.com/notapaladin
>>4423529Have a good rest OP.
>>4423529Thanks, OP
>>4423338???????'s debut?
>>4423507Sorry, I'm working weekdays. It's 1645 here now.
>>4423338https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=y1zilZyeh7o
>Opee no longer draws cool vampiresWhat a shitty world we live in
>>44247372020 claims another victim
Rolled 83 (1d100)>>4425762Well, let's get it open. We'll accompany them on an expedition.
Rolled 44 (1d100)>>4425762We back, and now to open this vault
>>4425773>>4425774Damnit, i thought I could sleep
Rolled 45 (1d100)>>4425776aw come on, OPit's the weekend
>>4425777Psshsshhshs. Now will Rasputin and the 2 Betty(s) open the hatch and venture down?
Rolled 34 (1d100)>>4425779Of course!
>>4425786>>4425779plus it'll make a good bonding exercise and the two Bettys will see that they're not so different after all.
>>4425786"hmmmm, this thing is sealed off by some magical wards. Alright, who wants to go first in breaking it?"
Rolled 57 (1d100)>>4425791Red Betty dispels the ward with her FIST
Rolled 29 (1d100)>>4425791"As a brave and awesome person, I suggest the other Betty do it."Both Bettys say it at the same time
Rolled 90 (1d100)>>4425793"Stand back, amateur. Lemme show you how to do it"Roll 2d100The wards have a +10 bonus
Rolled 38, 56 = 94 (2d100)>>4425801NAT 100URAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
Rolled 33, 4 = 37 (2d100)>>4425801Alt-Betty laughs
>>4425803"NICE GOING DIP SHIIIiiiiiiit"
Rolled 65 (1d100)>>4425807Clearly, this means they must work together.
>>4425808"Try hitting it together! See if that works!""NUH UH"
Rolled 36 (1d100)>>4425813"If you two work together I'll give you both a present!"
>>4425814"...what kind?""...yea! What kinda present?!"
Rolled 2 (1d100)>>4425816Your own training dummies, shaped in the person you hate the most!
Rolled 20 (1d100)>>4425816>>4425820that's a good present
>>4425821>>4425820"REAAALLLLY?"
Rolled 9 (1d100)>>4425824Yes, 'REALLY'. Now, get that hatch open.
Rolled 34 (1d100)>>4425824>>4425827Yeah, really, you two need training dummies anything, so why not something custom-made
Rolled 52 (1d100)>>4425828With a simultaneous cry of "ALRIGHT", the Betty(s) join forces to punch that hatch openRoll 2d100, highest roll gets it
Rolled 36, 46 = 82 (2d100)>>4425833LET'S GOOOOOOOOO
Rolled 41, 34 = 75 (2d100)>>4425833
>>4425774WHERE YOU AT NIGGAWE NEED YOU
Rolled 69, 3 = 72 (2d100)>>4425833Shit
>>4425833>highest roll gets itwait, what kind of highest roll
>>4425838"Oh hey they actually did it"
Rolled 16 (1d100)>>4425840OH 2D100 as in both Bettys had a d100 eachlet's fucking go, time to explore
Rolled 66 (1d100)>>4425840>>4425841both argue over who contributed more effort
>>4425839Literally, which ever roll's the highest counts
>>4425842"Brother! Did you see that! I totally contributed more! So clearly, I should get a higher quality dummy than this bitch""Fuck off! Rasputin! I clearly did more! I should get the better dummy instead!"
Rolled 81 (1d100)>>4425851This goes on as you descend down the hatch
Rolled 67 (1d100)>>4425851>>4425853
>>4425853"ADDRESS HIM AS MASTER, YOU WHORRRRRRE""I CALL HIM WHATEVER I WANT, BITCH"and so on and so on
Rolled 31 (1d100)>>4425859But what do they discover at the bottom?
Rolled 50 (1d100)>>4425859>>4425862I am glad Rasputin is so stoic.
>>4425863"HALT!" - Rasputin suddenly yelled as they reach a seemingly empty hallway"eep!" - replied both Betty(s)
Rolled 47 (1d100)>>4425869It may look plain, but let's use Rasputin's demon mask to detect any traps.
Rolled 74 (1d100)>>4425869Rasputin throws the head of Alt-Bobby he kept with him to trigger any traps
>>4425871Countless buzzsaws, spikes and flame jets bursts out from every direction as the skull tumbles down the hallway. As it reaches the end, the ceiling itself comes lose, revealing it to be a massive hydraulic press and crushes Alt-Bobby's damaged head into dust."You, uh, kept that?""It's not like he was using it"
Rolled 48 (1d100)>>4425880So, there's gotta be another way through besides this trap hall way.
Rolled 73 (1d100)>>4425880"Didn't like him anyway, too slimy.">>4425882
>>4425883>>4425882Of course, Rasputin can just use his senses, or even his secret seeing demon mask, to find the hidden passage to pass through this hallway of doom. But he can also have the 2 Betty(s) compete to find it to train their senses instead.
Rolled 39 (1d100)>>4425889The latter option. This is a good challenge for them!
Rolled 99 (1d100)>>4425889Get them to find it, but also secretly find it yourself. It's good training.
Rolled 35 (1d100)>>4425892Rasputin instructs the 2 girls to find the hidden passage. Begrudgingly they complied.Meanwhile, roll 2d100Rasputin has a +50 bonus
Rolled 47, 85 = 132 (2d100)>>4425896URAH!
>>4425897There it is
Rolled 82 (1d100)>>4425899Damn, Red Betty is so close to figuring it out!
Rolled 34 (1d100)>>4425899>>4425900Now, see how they do it
Rolled 84 (1d100)>>4425900Roll 2d100 for Betty
Rolled 23, 35 = 58 (2d100)>>4425908URAAAAAAAAAAAH!
Rolled 32, 42 = 74 (2d100)>>4425908
Rolled 65, 13 = 78 (2d100)>>4425908Okay.
Rolled 74, 30 = 104 (2d100)>>4425908nyeh
>>4425912
Rolled 15 (1d100)>>4425917Meanwhile, Alt-Betty is kicking the other side
Rolled 72 (1d100)>>4425917Turn to your right Betty.
Rolled 66 (1d100)>>4425917But what about...Other Betty?
>>4425923>>4425922>>4425920
Rolled 4 (1d100)>>4425930Damn, we'll be stuck here all day; subtly point out to one of the Betties where the hidden door is
Rolled 22 (1d100)>>4425930Lets just find that passage our self.
Rolled 84 (1d100)>>4425930Eh you’re trying.Give them a pro tip to sharpen their senses.
>>4425937"Ahem....Have you two tried being still and sensing out the room with your heightened senses?"
Rolled 89 (1d100)>>4425941Lets roll to use our senses.
Rolled 33 (1d100)>>4425941>>4425944Had this weird feeling that we'll merge our Betty(s) in the future.
>>4425941>>4425944Yes.>>4425947Also yes.
Rolled 78 (1d100)>>4425952dice c’mon you gotta roll when I tell you to
Rolled 42 (1d100)>>4425944Roll 2d100Highest gets it
Rolled 25, 43 = 68 (2d100)>>4425969
Rolled 19, 74 = 93 (2d100)>>4425969oh, this is no problem
Rolled 62, 80 = 142 (2d100)>>4425969Okay.
>>4425973"Hmm? One of them seems to have realized something..."
