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/qst/ - Quests


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OH SHIT NIGGA, you are SHOTASNIFFER. Eldest daughter of the skeleton villain LOLISNIFFER. After a long and arduous succesion war against your siblings, you now claim ownership of your family's island, as the leader of the UNITED SHOTA SNIFFING REPULIC. From here, you shall spread your skeletal power accross the globe and dominate the world!

But uh that's gonna be put on hold right now. Since you're island is currently experiencing the Mechapocalypse - you and your armies are currently besieging the gigantic mecha abomination that's the cause of all this. But so far there's barely any progress.

What do
>>
Rolled 69 (1d100)

>>4326826

Assimilate self into mech. Submission to Marian is only way
>>
Rolled 58 (1d100)

>>4326826
Listen to some atmospheric music to help with thinking about what would be best to do
>>
Rolled 48 (1d100)

>>4326826
Throw army in green beam. That'll stop it
>>
Rolled 10 (1d100)

titties sprinkles
>>
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>>4326828
I wonder who would be behind this post
>>
Rolled 56 (1d100)

>>4326835
Think of a plan to keep this story moving. andela andela arriba!
>>
>>4326835
A piano falls on Marian
>>
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>>4326841
This is what you got so far
>>
Rolled 3 (1d100)

>>4326853
>>
Rolled 23 (1d100)

>>4326854
Let's gather all our forces on the island right now for a desperation move to save Marian and Quattro.
>>
Rolled 8 (1d100)

>>4326854
Call a vote on 1 and 2, strike off 3
>>
Rolled 9 (1d100)

>>4326854
....Call Dad
>>
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>>4326856
Indeed. Quattro managed to send out a distress signal before he went dark. Apparently he and Marian has been absorbed by the giant mech, allowing it to upgrade itself further. If we could get them out, it would lose power
>>
Rolled 63 (1d100)

>>4326854
Shit we need a better plan. Do we have someone better at making plans than us?
>>
Rolled 16 (1d100)

>>4326866
It's worth a shot, we'll do it and we can resort to one of our backup plans like calling Dad if we fuck it up majorly.
>>
Rolled 37 (1d100)

>>4326866
Let's do it and not call Dad because he'll spank all of us
>>
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>>4326871
"You're toooo oooold for a spaaaanking. Dooon't wooooorrrryyyyyy" - Dream Dad
>>
Rolled 31 (1d100)

>>4326874
yeah it's all about reenacting the backbreaker with you
>>
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>>4326875
"Knightfall's a really goood batman aaaarc"
>>
Rolled 40 (1d100)

>>4326874
LETS GO OLD MAN
>>
Rolled 89 (1d100)

>>4326878
>>4326879
>>
Rolled 42 (1d100)

>>4326878
sanity check
>>
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>>4326881
"Gooooo wheeerrreeeeee"

These hallucinations are getting out of control
>>
Rolled 12 (1d100)

>>4326884
banish these hallucinations and get on with the attack
>>
Rolled 5 (1d100)

>>4326884
we really should see a psychiatrist
>>4326886
>>
Rolled 65 (1d100)

>>4326884
>>4326882
>>
Rolled 78 (1d100)

>>4326884
Take our risperdal and attack
>>
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Rolled 11 (1d100)

>>4326888
Roll 2d100
>>
Rolled 88, 88 = 176 (2d100)

>>4326893
BEGONE DAD
>>
>>4326894
The apparition disappears
>>
Rolled 56 (1d100)

>>4326897
commence the attack against clippy
>>
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>>4326897
ah shit misclicked
>>
Rolled 43 (1d100)

>>4326899
>>4326898
>>
Rolled 13 (1d100)

>>4326899
*dad calling*
>>
Rolled 73 (1d100)

>>4326899
Order some pizzas from pizza hut so we'll have something to celebrate with after we've dealt with Cunty and his mechs.
>>
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Rolled 62 (1d1000)

>>4326902
Your forces open fire on the mechanical monstrosity!

ROLL 2d1200

It has a +400 bonus
>>
Rolled 1157, 188 = 1345 (2d1200)

>>4326909
WE FUCKING GOT THIS SIBLINGS
ALL OUT OR NOTHING
>>
Rolled 1018, 562 = 1580 (2d1200)

>>4326909
>>
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>>4326910
Turns out you did not got this, as it defends against your barrage and fired off a blast of its own, scattering your army
>>
Rolled 45 (1d100)

>>4326917
YELL AS LOUD AS POSSIBLE TO RALLY YOUR ARMY FROM THE SCATTERING!
>>
>>4326917
FIRE HARDER AT HIM
>>
Rolled 87 (1d100)

>>4326917
>>4326867
>>
Rolled 17 (1d100)

>>4326917
Fuck that fucking paperclip with a rake
>>4326920
>>4326921
>>
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Rolled 80 (1d100)

>>4326917
Quick, use speech 100 to scientifically convince it that it should shutdown forever and then blow up
>>
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>>4326922
There's gotta be somebody with a big brain plan to turn this around! But who?!
>>
Rolled 8 (1d100)

>>4326929
My boy Luke of course
>>
Rolled 86 (1d100)

>>4326929
Anyone who knows how to disable AI?
>>
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>>4326933
Roll 2d8.

First roll is for pickings, second roll is for result of who has knowledge on AI dismantlement:

1. Chosen one
2. Betty
3. Rasputin
4. VP
5. Director
6. Lilly
7. Luke
8. Olessa
>>
Rolled 2, 5 = 7 (2d8)

>>4326935
>>
Rolled 2, 6 = 8 (2d8)

>>4326935
>>
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>>4326936
Of course......2 + 5 = 7 so it means Luke is out savior
>>
Rolled 56 (1d100)

>>4326941
wat
>>
Rolled 100 (1d100)

>>4326941
clearly the guy with the dragon obessed with wieners would know a lot about how to kill an AI
>>
>>4326943
N-NANI
>>
>>4326945
nothing personnel...kid
>>
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>>4326943
Well you see, Luke actually majored in computer science.

Or you could go with the actual roll of 5 and take the Director instead
>>
Rolled 88 (1d100)

>>4326947
Fuck it, roll with it
Luke give us what you got.
>>
Rolled 2 (1d100)

>>4326947
yeah, she would be the one who knows shit instead of marian
>>
Rolled 75 (1d100)

>>4326947
Yeah go with her. But let Luke throw in his 2 cents too.
>>
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>>4326948
You are now Luke. Shotasniffer has just asked you to come up with a plan to defeat this thing. You know that with its current upgrades, Clippy has grown too powerful for methods such as hacking into systems to work, he probably has a super strong firewall by now. But you also know from what Quattro told you that it has assimilated itself with its backup servers in order to upgrade itself, with the tradeoff that it now only has 1 body and no backups. Which means you can suggest:

A. Keep attacking it, but focused on one point until we can make a hole in its armor, after that send an elite team of the best Skeleton Island warriors inside to sabotage it and also get Quattro and Marian out

B. Borrow Lilly's bigass future sword then ask the others to give you their energy, ride your dragon up into the sky and split apart the heavens with a mighty swing of your blade, cutting the mechanical monster in half right at its core

C. Have the GSG people develop a virus to attack its systems

D. I dunno, come up with something
>>
Rolled 66 (1d100)

>>4326957
>B. Borrow Lilly's bigass future sword then ask the others to give you their energy, ride your dragon up into the sky and split apart the heavens with a mighty swing of your blade, cutting the mechanical monster in half right at its core

LUKE YOUR SAUSAGE POWERS ARE SUPREME
LET'S DO THIS
>>
Rolled 97 (1d100)

>>4326957
I know, we spray his firewall with water to cool it down
>>
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>>4326959
And what would the water be in this metaphor
>>
Rolled 83 (1d100)

>>4326961
>>4326958
get on with it
>>
Rolled 35 (1d100)

>>4326961
Uhh... data? Like, bad data that Clippy wouldn't want? What if we tried to email him the whole internet using Director's knowledge and tech to distract him?
>>
Rolled 36 (1d100)

>>4326957
>C. Have the GSG people develop a virus to attack its systems
While we attack it with a bigass sword.
>>
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>>4326962
"Look guys, I have an idea. Clippy has upgraded itself too much now, we can't hack into its system. BUT. This thing is still built using materials from our world. Lilly's sword she got from the Alt world is not made of stuff from here, so maybe it doesn't know how to defend against it yet. So what if I take it, and you guys can do you wacky ki magic stuff to empower it some more, so I can fly up there and cut the thing in half. It's a plan. Also it'll be dope as hell"
>>
Rolled 7 (1d100)

>>4326972
Everyone does a dragon ball z charge up sequence into Luke's sword
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
>>
Rolled 77 (1d100)

>>4326972
Can't we use the data we salvaged from the aircraft you shot down to help weaken it
>>
Rolled 37 (1d100)

>>4326972
They all agree, but only on the condition that Luke cuts it from the crotch up
>>
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>>4326976
"Wait, of course! Quattro and me did shot down one of its combiner aircrafts before. If we can salvage it we may get some more data on Clippy Prime. But it's downed waaaaaay over there. Getting to it will surely get Clippy's attention so that's a whole mission in of itself"
>>
Rolled 18 (1d100)

>>4326982
What if we send a decoy to distract it?
>>
Rolled 17 (1d100)

>>4326982
Can't we catapult ourselves over there fast to get it? Or we get VP to distract Clippy
>>
Rolled 72 (1d100)

>>4326982
We'll use the dragon and carry VP/director with us to hack it while we cover for them!
>>
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>>4326985
"Could work, who are what would the decoy be?"
>>
Rolled 30 (1d100)

>>4326990
Chosen One
>>
Rolled 21 (1d100)

>>4326990
We'll do a feint, while you fly with Director to salvage
>>4326991
>>
Rolled 13 (1d100)

>>4326990
You, Luke.
Have Rasputin and Boy get ready to jump into the hole that Luke and the dragon are gonna blast in its weak spot, so they can free Quattro and maybe even Marian
Director keep hacking at the firewall and locating weaknesses, so they can take advantage and weaken it as much as possible
While that's happening your Glorious Leader and VP are gonna go salvage that 3rd server - now everyone get ready for a biker to jump on a motherfucking dragon and fuck up a giant robot with a bigarse fucking sword
>>
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>>4326991
"Yes. The USSR still has some siege tank and copters that has not been mecha-fied. We could use those to provide a distraction while the others do their thing"
>>
Rolled 86 (1d100)

>>4326997
But we need a reason for Clippy to go after him instead of us.
Why not make him dress up like Dad?
>>
Rolled 84 (1d100)

>>4326997
Let's do it, bring Director with us on the dragon to drop off while we CHARGE UP our KI energy
>>
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>>4326999
"Of course. Being made by and also absorbing Marian means it must also have inherited SOME of Marian's insecurities and memories so it probably sees him as a priority target. Dressing Chosen One up like dad could make for a great distraction"

"I mean the tank brigade could just fire on it first to aggro, but okay"
>>
Rolled 12 (1d100)

>>4327005
We ready to do this plan?
>>
Rolled 39 (1d100)

>>4327005
Well we can do both
>>4327001
Of course that means we need people from each color to charge up...and we only have Bobby on Yellow...
>>
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>>4327008
"Actually, the former yellows are just now part of the dojo. So they still count"
>>
Rolled 87 (1d100)

>>4327014
Good, then we don't have any problems. Let's get to work on this
>>
Rolled 95 (1d100)

>>4327014
Okay cool well y'all get charging and stuff caus I'm getting on the dragon now
>>
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>>4327018
Alright, to recap.

The USSR forces, with Chosen One dressing up like Dad at the helm will charge Clippy, aggroing it. This will allow Luke to transport director over to the crash site where she can salvage it for information. Naturally, Luke will act as her escort too incase things goes tits up. Meanwhile, everyone else available will be providing general support and charging up their energy into the big ass sword. When the salvaging of data is done, we'll improvise the next step of the plan depending on what the data will give us
>>
Rolled 69 (1d100)

>>4327024
Yes, basically
>>
Rolled 27 (1d100)

>>4327024
Get it done
>>
Rolled 47 (1d100)

>>4327024
Yes, now let's hurry up before Lily gets bored and just starts shooting it with arrows or something
>>
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>>4327025
Alright, now who wants to play as the distraction, the salvagers or the support crew
>>
Rolled 65 (1d100)

>>4327029
Salvage team
>>
Rolled 4 (1d100)

>>4327029
I volunteer for the salvage team
>>
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>>4327030
Alright, everything seems to be in place
>>
Rolled 33 (1d100)

>>4327043
Let's drop off Director nice and slow.
>>
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Rolled 719 (1d1000)

>>4327046
Roll 2d1200
>>
Rolled 1051, 409 = 1460 (2d1200)

>>4327049
hopefully the decoy is enough
>>
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>>4327050
Oh shit, it has drones around the area to guard the wreck!
>>
Rolled 13 (1d100)

>>4327051
Start blasting them, Director!
>>
Rolled 44 (1d100)

>>4327051
Boy's on it, he's good at shooting down drones
>>
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Rolled 563 (1d1000)

>>4327053
"Boy! Over there! Take out those drones bother Luke and Director!"

"On it"

Roll 2d1200

Boi has +300 bonus
>>
Rolled 1014, 397 = 1411 (2d1200)

>>4327061
SPIRIT FIST
>>
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>>4327062
>>
Rolled 45 (1d100)

>>4327069
NOW, GET DIRECTOR ON THE GROUND SO SHE CAN SALVAGE!
>>
Rolled 85 (1d100)

>>4327069
get to the aircraft!
>>
Rolled 29 (1d100)

>>4327069
Quick, Director, get in there!
>>
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>>4327071
>>4327071
"Alright Luke, we're getting close....

A. ....just drop me off and cover me while I work"
B. ....watch out for that drone!"
C. ....but have you considered getting even closer to your sister, Olessa?"
>>
Rolled 45 (1d100)

>>4327080
C.
You know we gotta keep up those incest implications when Director/VP are around.
>>
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>>4327081
"There's nothing wrong with a close bond between siblings, you know. I see the way she's always took care of you. You don't have to deny the warm feelings inside your heart whenever you're near her, you know"

"wat"
>>
Rolled 53 (1d100)

>>4327089
Switch over to Director now
>>
Rolled 8 (1d100)

>>4327089
>>4327091
Start singing horribly about how it's ok to be with siblings
>>
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>>4327091
>>
Rolled 62 (1d100)

>>4327097
>>4327093
>>
Rolled 86 (1d100)

>>4327097
jump down to the wreck with the power of incest
>>
Rolled 2 (1d100)

>>4327097
See what state the server's in while singing horribly and incestuously
>>
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>>4327099
You leaped off Luke's dragon and landed on the ground below. Yelling at Luke to love his sister, then entire way down.
>>
Rolled 98 (1d100)

>>4327112
Check out the server and see if we can salvage anything
>>
also god damn quattro and marian jobbed it so hard
all they had to do was press the server shut down server before they got assimilated
>>
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Rolled 116 (1d800)

>>4327113
It's heavily damaged. Roll 2d1000 to see if you can salvage anything from it
>>
Rolled 855, 265 = 1120 (2d1000)

>>4327129
>>
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>>4327130
This will take some time. Hope Luke can cover you until then
>>
Rolled 11 (1d100)

>>4327138
How's the decoy crew doing?
>>
Rolled 88 (1d100)

>>4327138
Hum songs about incest to yourself while you do this
>>
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>>4327141
>>
Rolled 35 (1d100)

>>4327145
do a hacking minigame so we get it done faster
>>
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Rolled 42 (1d100)

>>4327148
You must get your CYBER SKELLY past the wreckage's defenses! Quick! Roll 2d100 to defeat this turret
>>
Rolled 79, 71 = 150 (2d100)

>>4327151
zap
>>
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>>4327152
>>
Rolled 68 (1d100)

>>4327153
easy! any more defenses?
>>
Rolled 99 (1d100)

>>4327153
Achievement unlocked
>>
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>>4327160
For defeating the turret, you've achieved the access to fight the Cyber Asura
>>
Rolled 19 (1d100)

>>4327166
wait for the boss to do his moves and look for an opening to attack
>>
Rolled 16 (1d100)

>>4327166
some 8-bit video game boss theme plays as you start shooting
>>
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>>4327168
Cyber Asura uses his move.......6 NUKES TO THE FACE
>>
Rolled 47 (1d100)

>>4327173
come on OP, be serious
>>
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>>4327175
Okay.

4 nukes to the face
>>
Rolled 84 (1d100)

>>4327177
DODGE!
>>
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Rolled 19 (1d100)

>>4327178
Roll 2d100!
>>
Rolled 40, 3 = 43 (2d100)

>>4327179
ABUSE THOSE IFRAMES NIGGA
>>
>>4327169
I NEED YOU TO ROLL
>>
Rolled 92, 19 = 111 (2d100)

>>4327179
>>
>>4327182
>>4327181
WHAT DOES A TIE DO
>>
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>>4327182
Boy, good thing you dodged that
>>
Rolled 10 (1d100)

>>4327184
UNLEASH OUR OWN SPECIAL ATTACK
>>
Rolled 94 (1d100)

>>4327184
Nuke his groin right back
>>
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Rolled 40 (1d100)

>>4327186
SKULL SHOT

Roll 2d100
>>
Rolled 91, 80 = 171 (2d100)

>>4327189
BOOM
>>
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>>4327190
>>
Rolled 6 (1d100)

>>4327191
ALRIGHT
DID WE LEARN ANYTHING ABOUT CLIPPY'S WEAKNESSES?
>>
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Rolled 890 (1d1000)

>>4327192
Roll 2d1000
>>
Rolled 837, 974 = 1811 (2d1000)

>>4327198
oh shit if we don't learn anything
CLUTCH ROLL
>>
>>4327199
Good clutch
>>
>>4327199
Whoa nice work on the rolling there
>>
>>4327199
Anon came through
>>
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>>4327199
Ah yes! You have learned that Clippy Prime's weakness:

A. It does not have data on Alt Dimension materials, like Lilly's bigass sword, so the nanomachines have not yet adapted to defend against it
B. It has a spot where its armor is the weakest due to heat venting
C. Its strongest attacks, while extremely devastating, uses up a lot of energy
D. All of the above
E. [Write In]

Decide on what it is, through ROLLING....or unanimously. Either way i'll have to step out for like an hour to get dinner, will continue when back. ye

Updates be here: https://twitter.com/notapaladin
>>
Rolled 29 (1d100)

>>4327208
oh, you'll be back in an hour, OP? aight
D.
>>
Rolled 90 (1d100)

>>4327208
D + and it is very insecure and starts panicking once it actually gets hurt
>>
>>4327208
Sounds like a D to me
Enjoy your various gulag scavengings OP
>>
Rolled 45 (1d100)

>>4327208
D
>>
Rolled 68 (1d100)

>>4327208
E. It has a big glowing weakpoint on the back
>>
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>>
Rolled 40 (1d100)

>>4327251
Hey
>>
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>>4327253
>>
Rolled 51 (1d100)

>>4327255
get back to plot
>>
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>>4327256
Right of course. So waht was the weakness again
>>
Rolled 49 (1d100)

>>4327258
>>4327209
>>4327212
>>4327213
>>4327215
D apparently
>>
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>>4327259
D? Well, if you insist
>>
Rolled 93 (1d100)

>>4327262
Here, 1 million dollars in destroyed drone parts falling onto you
>>
Rolled 86 (1d100)

OP plans on destroying us with his D apparently
>>
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>>4327264
Oh shi--

Unfortunately, thread can no longer continue as OP has been crushed under tons of drone parts.
>>
Rolled 15 (1d100)

>>4327267
nooo OP, the vtubers will miss you
>>
Rolled 93 (1d100)

>>4327267
F
>>
Rolled 38 (1d100)

>>4327267
Plus ultra OP, we need to fry shit with dragons
>>
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>>4327269
>>
Rolled 31 (1d100)

>>4327273
read his will
see who his money will be donated to
>>
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>>4327274
"pls bury me with my money"
>>
Rolled 58 (1d100)

>>4327277
clearly that must mean we should take it for ourselves
>>
Rolled 25 (1d100)

>>4327277
Ha. As if. Let's hit the casino with OP's $83.95
>>
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>>4327278
>>
Rolled 36 (1d100)

>>4327282
>>
>>4327282
>>4327284
ah well, time to burn the coffin
>>
Rolled 97 (1d100)

>>4327284
Come back to the living and grab it back for yourself if you don't like what we're doing
>>
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>>4327286
>>
Rolled 13 (1d100)

>>4327287
>>4327285
>>
Rolled 60 (1d100)

>>4327287
do that coffin dance meme thing
>>
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>>4327288
And with that, Quattro now has access to OP's massive fortune of....13 dollars
>>
Rolled 27 (1d100)

>>4327292
>>4327212
yay
enough distractions, let's get back to the plot
>>
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>>4327294
The director relays what she's found to the rest. It's just as Luke suspected, it doesn't have data on Lilly's sword yet so currently we can damage it with that. And there's a spot on its body where the armor's the lightest. Plus, due to it being still originally a Marian creation, and having absorbed him, it shares some of Marian's insecurities. Right now it's smug, safe and secure in the knowledge that it's invincible. But if we manage to even harm it a bit, it'll panic and go wild. Which means it'll try to spam its strongest moves in response. If we manage to survive those, then it'll be a sitting duck due to expending all its power
>>
Rolled 18 (1d100)

>>4327300
So, what need to do is to attack its weak point to force it into a panic, hope we can survive the barrage, then go for the killing blow when it's tired.
Where is the weak point
>>
Rolled 60 (1d100)

>>4327300
>>4327301
>>
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>>4327302
The weak point is......

Roll 2d100. Second roll:

1-25: A point in the wing
26- 46: The chest skull's eye
47-77: The crotch
78-100: You decide
>>
Rolled 58, 27 = 85 (2d100)

>>4327308
THE HEAD!
>>
Rolled 96, 91 = 187 (2d100)

>>4327308
>>
>>4327311
nice
>>
>>4327311
Where then? Bottom two thirds of the nape of the neck? Butthole? Hmmmm
>>
>>4327315
we can roll for our choice right
>>
>>4327316
Isn't that what we were meant to be doing now?
>>
>>4327316
you literally decide
>>
>>4327317
>>4327318
I guess the big booster that functions as his "asshole"
>>
>>4327316
What this dude said >>4327318

If you get <78 then it's up to the dice. But you got 91/ So you decide where it is
>>
>>4327323
>>4327320
A really big one
>>
>>4327320
Big butthole it is
>>
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>>4327320
And the weakpoint is this big booster/exhaust it has in its backside
>>
Rolled 92 (1d100)

>>4327328
CHARGE UP LUKE'S SWORD NOW
>>
Rolled 3 (1d100)

>>4327328
If we can shove something up on it, it'll start firing wildly
>>
Rolled 79 (1d100)

>>4327328
Hey Lily, wanna help shove your big sword into a robot's rectum?
>>
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Rolled 461 (1d1000)

>>4327330
IT'S TRYING TO BREAK UP YOUR FORMATION! WATCHOUT FOR THE GIANT ROCKET FIST!

ROLL 2d1200. IT HAS A +400 BONUS! YOU HAVE +100
>>
Rolled 240, 483 = 723 (2d1200)

>>4327336
IF WE DODGE THIS ATTACK, PREPARE AN IMMEDIATE COUNTER ATTACK FOR ITS ASSHOLE
>>
Rolled 71, 240 = 311 (2d1200)

>>4327337
DODGE
>>
>>4327332
COME ON ROLL NIGGA
>>
Rolled 724, 799 = 1523 (2d1200)

>>4327336
fugfugfug
>>
>>4327344
>>4327336
COULD IT BE???
>>
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>>4327344
>>
Rolled 97 (1d100)

>>4327357
SEND IT BACK UP ITS ASS
>>
>>4327357
Whew
>>4327359
Yes
>>
>>4327359
>>4327357
>FISTING YOUR OWN ASSHOLE
HAHAHAHA
>>
I'm a bit out of the loop. Someone give me quick rundown of the plot since we took down the elf king
>>
>>4327363
Quick, pay OP 1 million to get the Plot quick rundown DLC
>>
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Rolled 486 (1d1000)

>>4327359
"FOCUS, BOY! PUSH!"

ROLL 2d1200. IT HAS A +400 BONUS! YOU HAVE +100
>>
Rolled 792, 564 = 1356 (2d1200)

>>4327368
INVOLUNTARY SUPPOSITORY
>>
Rolled 54, 95 = 149 (2d100)

>>4327368
B O Y
>>
Rolled 1056, 104 = 1160 (2d1200)

>>4327368
FUCK
>>
>>4327371
>d100

'cmon now
>>
Rolled 350, 884 = 1234 (2d1200)

>>4327368
B O Y
(RIGHT DICE THIS TIME)
>>
>>4327372
ALSO FUCK
>>
>>4327376
>>4327372
LET ME ROLL FIRST NEXT TIME, I'M GETTING GOOD ROLLS ON MY SECOND d1200
>>
>>4327363
for realsies tho. The quick rundown is this:

After the elf king -> Mad Scientist built the portal to alt dimension as agreed -> Went over there and looted the Alt Yellows' HQ and fucked up their shit -> Went back and attacked their HQ in this dimension -> Took down Alt Yellows, Rasputin vaporized Alt Bobby's body while Betty piledrived/powerbombed Alt Betty off a tower -> Went back to island -> Marian's mechs gone rogue and started Mechapocalypse
>>
>>4327379
>>4327363
also somehow along the way we got recognized as heroes instead
>>
>>4327363
tl;dr = Took out alt-Bobby [now a skull in our possession] and alt-Betty [wrecked but fucked off back to her dimension?] and also Galaxy-Burger at the GB HQ, got filmed by media afterwards so now everyone thinks we're heroes. Got back to the island and an AI's taken over all GSG's shit and assimilated Marian, and is fucking things up bigtime so we're busy punching it
>>
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>>4327372
THE ANGLE'S WRONG! The two fists slid off eachother and the contest of strength is abruptly ended! But that at least made it took back its rocket fist
>>
Rolled 66 (1d100)

>>4327384
FIST IT SOME MORE
>>
Rolled 41 (1d100)

>>4327384
SEND IN SOME FORCES TO ATTACK ITS ASSHOLE
>>
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>>4327386
"Boy. Can you continue the assault to buy time for Luke's sword to be charged?"
>>
Rolled 39 (1d100)

>>4327398
Sure, while we start deciding to launch something into his ass
>>
Rolled 41 (1d100)

>>4327398
B O Y UNLEASHES DEMON MODE
>>
>>4327400
Aw yis
>>
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>>4327400
yey
>>
Rolled 64 (1d100)

>>4327410
100% OVER 100% POWER
>>
Rolled 10 (1d100)

>>4327410
DEMON PUUUUUUUUUUUUUNCH
>>
Rolled 13 (1d100)

>>4327410
Shotasniffer concentrate. Imagination time is later.
Meanwhile Boy absolutely continues the assault
>>
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>>4327412
>>
Rolled 30 (1d100)

>>4327427
Shotasniffer gets turned off
>>
Rolled 74 (1d100)

>>4327427
BOY (MAN) STARTS SLASHING AT CLIPPY PRIME!
also holy shit that's a new design
>>
Rolled 81 (1d100)

>>4327427
Whoa shit
OKAY BOY ATTACK
[Also this >>4327432]
>>
>>4327433
Hehheh - agreed, Boy in this form should definitely be called "MAN"
>>
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Rolled 78 (1d100)

>>4327433
ROLL 2d1200. IT HAS A +400 BONUS! YOU HAVE +200
>>
Rolled 1055, 1112 = 2167 (2d1200)

>>4327461
>d100
>>
Rolled 971 (1d1000)

>>4327461
Whoops. forgot a zero there
>>
>>4327464
SHIT
UNLESS ANY OF US CAN ROLL HIGHER THAN 1171 IT'S OVER
COME ON BROS
>>4327434
>>4327432
>>
Rolled 972, 1000 = 1972 (2d1200)

>>4327464
>basically impossible
fuck the fucking bonus
>>
Rolled 280, 859 = 1139 (2d1200)

>>4327461
THESE ROLLS ARE NO WAY TO SPEND GOOD BUDGET OP
>>
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>>4327463
>>4327464

IT EXTENDS ITS ARM BLADES AND BRINGS THEM UP FOR DEFENSE! ONCE AGAIN CLIPPY AND BOY CLASH AS BOY'S GIANT PSYCHIC ENERGY CLAWS ARE STOPPED BY CLIPPY PRIME'S MASSIVE BLADES
>>
Rolled 20 (1d100)

>>4327476
SHOVE SOMETHING UP ITS ASS WHILE ITS DISTRACTED
>>
Rolled 64 (1d100)

>>4327476
SHOTASNIFFER SNEAK ATTACK A BOMB UP CLIPPY'S ASS WHILE ITS DISTRACTED
>>
Rolled 38 (1d100)

>>4327469
Seriously though, that is some nice budget you've got going on
>>4327476
Quick, while Man and Rasputin keep distracting it - Luke and Shotasniffer fly behind it on the dragon! Ki users power up his sword!
>>
>>4327478
The age-old passtime
>>
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>>4327479
"THEN CLIMB ON, SIS. LET'S GO"
>>
Rolled 35 (1d100)

>>4327491
THIS IS IT
CLIMB ON THE SKELETAL DRAGON AND DO IT
>>
Rolled 57 (1d100)

>>4327491
>>4327495
Activate your rage at Clippy and Marian!
>>
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Rolled 601 (1d1000)

>>4327496
ROLL 2d1200
>>
Rolled 362, 1100 = 1462 (2d1200)

>>4327502
URAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
MARRRRRRRRRRRIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN
>>
>>4327502
>>4327503
U_FUCKING_RAH
>>
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>>4327503
Damn, 1100!. That's quite high
>>
Rolled 81 (1d100)

>>4327517
don't you dare
>>
Rolled 49 (1d100)

>>4327517
stop being cheeky, OP
>>
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>>4327518
Don't I dare what
>>
Rolled 92 (1d100)

>>4327528
>continue as normal
>>
Rolled 32 (1d100)

>>4327528
Continue as normal, get that rage going, OP
>>
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>>4327529
Luke deftly carries you through the sky, zipping up right behind Clippy Prime while it's distracted aaaand.....shoved a bomb right up its exhaust port.
>>
Rolled 76 (1d100)

>>4327537
IT'S WEAKENED! LUKE, NOW'S YOUR CHANCE!
>>
Rolled 59 (1d100)

>>4327537
Rage-punch the rage-bomb up the anus
Then immediately dragon-fire the anus for good measure
–£PA
>>
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>>4327540
"WAIT! NOT YET! IT'S ENTERED PANIC MODE DUE TO HAVING ITS EXHAUST PORT BLOWN UP! EVERYONE GET TO COVER! IT'S GONNA TRY SOMETHING BIG!"
>>
Rolled 82 (1d100)

>>4327559
BOY PUTS UP A PSYCHIC SHIELD FOR EVERYONE!
>>
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>>4327561
"WE'RE TOO FAR UP FROM THEM" Luke yells "HANG ON, IMMA GET US UP AS FAR AS POSSIBLE"

As Luke maneuvers his dragon to head straight up the stratosphere, your forces below are gathered behind Boy's demonic form, as he puts all of his power into a barrier, covering your army. Rasputin and Betty, alongside the dojo skellies lend Boy their Ki to help him maintain the shield.

Meanwhile Clippy Prime puts all of its outputs into overdrive as it plans to vent a massive amount of its energy into the surrounding area
>>
Rolled 85 (1d100)

>>4327580
SEEMS CLIPPY IS UPSET ITS LOSING
JUST LIKE MARIAN!
>>
Rolled 58 (1d100)

>>4327580
Reflect it away from our stuff! We've had enough wrecked as it is
Better yet reflect it back at it
>>
Rolled 84 (1d100)

>>4327580
Luke's dragon goes extra fast.
>>
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Rolled 81 (1d1000)

>>4327584
IT UNLEASHES A HUMONGOUS PILLAR OF ENERGY. ANNIHILATING THE AREA.

ROLL 2d1200

IT HAS A +500

YOU HAVE A +200
>>
Rolled 317, 739 = 1056 (2d1200)

>>4327601
URAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
>>
Rolled 562 (1d1000)

>>4327605
Hmm yes but what if
>>
>>4327609
are you trying to cheese us again, OP
>>
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>>4327611
Nnnnnoooo
>>
>>4327609
What if what
>>
Rolled 79 (1d100)

>>4327615
also the visual effects on this pic are really fuckin' nice
>>
Rolled 4 (1d100)

>>4327615
Alright...it should be out of power by now
>>
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>>4327617
Don't get used to it. After this episode we'll have to massively cut back the budget.

ANYWAY. After destroying a huge chunk of the island....which is GSG territory....Clippy Prime has expended most of its power and is now in....Power Saving mode. If there's a time to bust out the finishing move. It's now. Lest you let it regenerate
>>
Rolled 28 (1d100)

>>4327625
Now that the weak spot has been bombed open and Clippy Prime is running low on energy, Shotasniffer flies back down to free Marian and Quattro from assimilation, to weaken the mech even further before the final blow!
Because the brothers are organic and male, her vocal charms can snap them out of Clippy's mind control.
She knows what she must do.
SING
SING LOUDLY INTO ITS ARSEHOLE
>>
Rolled 58 (1d100)

>>4327625
>>4327632
QUICKLY
>>
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Rolled 285 (1d800)

>>4327634
It uses its energy reserves to put up a desperate defense! ROLL 2d1200
>>
Rolled 1189, 595 = 1784 (2d1200)

>>4327645
MARRRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN
QUAAAAAATTRROOOOOOOOOOOO
>>
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>>4327650
Swiftly dodging through its swipes, Luke brings you down to the exploded exhaust. Singing the names of Marian and Quattro loudly into the mechanical beast during its weakened state has allowed them to break free of its systems and fall out of the port and onto Luke's dragon!
>>
Rolled 94 (1d100)

>>4327660
... It's time.
Luke, CUT IT IN TWAIN!
>>
Rolled 26 (1d100)

>>4327660
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QUzhydrxcoI
Everyone! Charge up Luke's sword!
>>
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>>4327661
GREATSWORD: MAXIMUM OUTPUT
>>
Rolled 66 (1d100)

>>4327680
CLIPPPPPPPPPYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!
>>
Rolled 54 (1d100)

>>4327680
CHOP CHOP
No limbs left on the torso please
>>
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Rolled 94 (1d100)

>>4327681
BEHOLD! A BLADE TO SPLIT OPEN THE HEAVENS! REND THE EARTH! AND OPEN THE GATES OF HELL! CUT IT DOWN! TO THE ATOMS!

ROLL 2d1500
>>
Rolled 360, 270 = 630 (2d1500)

>>4327692
SPLIT APART THE HEAVENS!
>>
>>4327692 >>4327694
PIERCE THE DAMN HEAVENS
>>
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>>4327694
>>
Rolled 71 (1d100)

>>4327720
URAH! [big green explosion]
>>
Rolled 63 (1d100)

>>4327720
This >>4327723 but with more URAH and a bigger explosion
>>
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>>4327723
>>
Rolled 15 (1d100)

>>4327745
URAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
big celebration scene
also, god damn Luke did some real work this thread
>>
Rolled 50 (1d100)

>>4327745
Nice. VP, Director, status report - did that get rid of all the rogue AI?
>>
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>>4327749
Unfortunately we have completely demolished the budget. So this is what we get for the celebration
>>
Rolled 66 (1d100)

>>4327768
aw come on, OP
surely you can an extra 10-20 minutes for a celebration with budget
>>
Rolled 31 (1d100)

>>4327768
Oh hey, the Hero Organization whose name I forgot found out about Clippy and decided to congratulate us on saving the world!
>>
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>>4327771
No. We are DONE for today. The budget is now gone. Reduced to nothing. Just like Clippy. But uh......rebuilding and dealing with the fallout from this is gonna be a bitch. Which we will explore....next time. yey

Upddates be here: https://twitter.com/notapaladin
>>
>>4327780
well alright then
Thanks for bread!
>>
>>4327782
Don't consume too much bread tho. Or you'll become round. Like me
>>
>>4327780
Thanks OP.
Much URAH-ing.
Shotasniffer's singing saves the day again...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ix7TVjL4zfQ
The Great Leader leads her loyal USSR forces in a rousing song of victory!
>>
soon
>>
>>4334911
Awaiting in my sleep.
>>
God I wish Shotasniffer would stomp my face into the dirt
>>
>>4334911
where you at, boss
>>
>>4334911
Soon (tm)
>>
2 hours in
>>
where the hell is OP
>>
>>4338305
Shhhh
>>
Rolled 71 (1d100)

>>4338308
stop donating to virtual youtubers
>>
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>>4338309
Bold of you to assume I have enough money to simp properly
>>
Rolled 40 (1d100)

>>4338320
clearly, let's rewind to clippy's last moments before his explosion
>>
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>>4338323
For what purpose?
>>
Rolled 57 (1d100)

>>4338328
we just want his reaction, did we get that on video
>>
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>>4338329
The video exploded due to the over budget rendering last time
>>
Rolled 30 (1d100)

>>4338335
oh hey dad
>>
Rolled 90 (1d100)

>>4338335
>lolisniffer
UH OH
>>
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>>4338338
In anycase. What to do.....with Marian
>>
Rolled 60 (1d100)

>>4338347
give him a proper spanking to make sure he doesn't mess with AI ever again
>>
Rolled 55 (1d100)

>>4338347
line em up, it's time for a beating by your siblings marian
>>
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>>4338351
"WAIT! NO! PLEASE! I'M A VICTIM HERE TOO! I'VE SUFFERED ENOUGH BEING ASSIMILATED INTO THAT THING! I WAS TRICKED! PLEASE BIG SIS! BROTHERS AND SISTERS! PLEASE HELP ME! QUATTRO! WHERE ARE YOU?! HELP!"
>>
Rolled 61 (1d100)

>>4338359
This is ALL YOUR FAULT, MARIAN
>>
Rolled 22 (1d100)

>>4338359
>>4338360
also betty really wants to kick your ass
>>
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>>4338360
"QUATTRO! PLEASE! SAVE ME, BROTHER! DIDN'T WE BOND?! WASN'T IT THANKS TO ME THAT YOU WERE ABLE TO REGAIN YOUR LOST POWERS?!"
>>
Rolled 80 (1d100)

>>4338367
Quattro back aways slowly
>>
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>>4338369
"BROTHER NOOOOOOO"
>>
Rolled 84 (1d100)

>>4338380
"seriously, look at betty, she looks like she wants to cave your skull in two"
>>
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>>4338382
"Not only did you sold my shit, Marian. But you also wrecked the island and put everyone in danger. After Big Sis spanked you. We're gonna have....a talk"
>>
Rolled 54 (1d100)

>>4338387
commence the spanking
>>
Rolled 55 (1d100)

>>4338387
cut to other plot hook while >>4338388
>>
Rolled 96 (1d100)

>>4338387
While spanking occurs... We should roll for whether or not they believe Marian that he didn't do this deliberately as part of some plan
>>
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Rolled 245 (1d1000)

>>4338390
You are now Marian.

Roll 2d1000
>>
Rolled 450, 696 = 1146 (2d1000)

>>4338396
No.
>>4338389
>>
Rolled 828, 909 = 1737 (2d1000)

>>4338397
Get ready for exile
>>
>>4338396
>>4338398
Wong numner
>>
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>>4338398
>>4338401
Congrats! Your siblings found it within themselves to believe that you didn't do all this on purpose!

But now they're mad you're a fucking dumbass instead!
>>
Rolled 91 (1d100)

>>4338404
This is going to take a while, let's go see what the heroes and villains are up to
>>
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>>4338405
>heroes

Alright, let's move camera over to the heroes to see wassup
>>
Rolled 75 (1d100)

>>4338412
"Oh fuck, it's another heroTV camera"
>>
Rolled 58 (1d100)

>>4338412
USSR's heroes of the hour at least. Can we get a damage report first? How much of our shit was wrecked? What was it?
>>
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>>4338414
Sir, how do you feel about being once again responsible for saving the world?

"SOMEBODY SMASH THAT THING BEFORE THIS EPISODE GOES LIVE"
>>
Rolled 17 (1d100)

>>4338429
>>4338417
>>
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>>4338434
As Marian's screams and ass slappings fill the air, the USSR's people's get together to figure out what's next

"Alright. the mechapocalypse is over. Now we'll deal with the consequences. How bad is it?"
>>
Rolled 100 (1d100)

>>4338456
well, the GSG territory is wrecked for one
>>
>>4338458
>100
Extremely wrecked
>>
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>>4338458
"Our factories, offices and even warehouses are in shambles."

"Not to mention the extreme landscaping the place received"

"Craters now litter the area. Gotta fix those some how too"

"Other territories aren't doing so well either"

"The USSR war factories and hangars are also wrecked"

"Dojo's pretty smashed up too. At least part of it is"

"Resort's also closed"

"Bone Kingdom's castles and church also need rebuilding"

"At least it didn't reach Mom and Dad's house."
>>
Rolled 44 (1d100)

>>4338469
You know what this means
IT'S CONQUEST TIME
NEW LANDS AWAIT
>>
Rolled 93 (1d100)

>>4338469
FFS MARIAN
How long is it gonna take to repair all this stuff? Do we have enough cash/resources?
>>
>>4338472
inb4 we wake up Grandpa on the next island we come to
>>
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>>4338474
"This...is gonna take a while"

"It's like we're back to island wars time already"

"Time to do more crimes and missions"

"We could also scrounge up anything we may be able to save. See how much that helps"

"Marian won't miss those figurines if we sell 'em. Yea?"

"Oh definitely"

"Totally"

"He'd thank us, even"
>>
Rolled 30 (1d100)

>>4338490
Weren't we supposed to go to space for a moon base after this?
>>
Rolled 47 (1d100)

>>4338490
Fortunately those rare weeb collectables will fetch a reasonable price at least
OKAY YES LET'S ACTUALLY DO A CRIME FOR ONCE AND STOP SAVING HUMANITY JEEZ
...Lilly have you smashed that camera drone yet?! Damn those bastards getting in while our defenses are down
>>
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>>4338503
>>4338495
Marian's screams continued to fill the air as the Bone Kingdom gets rid of the HeroTV camera drones.

"Oh yeah. We were also to get a moon base, right?"

"A moon base that Marian oversaw the construction of, yes"

"Goddamnit"

"Alright. We need some big jobs. Pretty sure the Kremlin didn't have it inner chambers damaged. Our control center is still safe. Time to get the thinkers of the USSR in there and start formulating plans"
>>
>>4338512
We could sell those figurines first, how much did they even cost to begin with
>>
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>>4338515
Roll 2d50000
>>
Rolled 80 (1d100)

>>4338512
Yeah don't think it's a good idea to abandon the island for spess just yet - our missions tended to blow up a fair bit. Also not keen on Marian building more robots/tech just yet for base-building. Cut to communist plotting in Kremlin war room
>>
Rolled 39112, 27520 = 66632 (2d50000)

>>4338518
Mo hentai = mo money
>>
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>>4338521
"His figures cost like, what....275K each, on average"
>>
Rolled 8 (1d100)

>>4338518
Well, grab them
>>
Rolled 19 (1d100)

>>4338525
To eBay with them. How many does he have? What will the proceeds mean for what choices we have for rebuilding?
>>
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>>4338525
>>4338531
"n-nnn-NNNOOOoooooo-oooo....no..." Marian meekly yells. Before the slaps come down again.

Now roll 2d100
>>
Rolled 88, 78 = 166 (2d100)

>>4338532
K
>>
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>>4338536
"Fucker got 78 of this fucking shit"
>>
Rolled 51 (1d100)

>>4338540
Ok, what are they even, are they mostly genderbent as a metaphor for Marian's repressed homosexuality
>>
Rolled 2 (1d100)

>>4338540
Hey 21.45 mil isn't bad - what will that let us do to start with?
>>
>>4338543
Thank fuck that Marian has only the rarest and most exquisite taste in transgender furry tentacle-molestation figurines
>>
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>>4338543
"A bunch. And some mecha. And a distressingly high amount of Fester Winchester figures. Can't believe he bought those"

"Can't believe they still sell those"
>>
Rolled 12 (1d100)

>>4338560
This is going to be hard to sell, wish those were Edward Roberts figurines instead
>>
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>>4338563
"If only Marian had better taste"
>>
Rolled 56 (1d100)

>>4338567
>Fester figurine for 275k
Why
How
What
...Yeah those really need to be sold i.e. not be on the island at all ever again. What can we do with the cash then?
>>
Rolled 17 (1d100)

>>4338567
>>4338545
And how are we even able to resell those without being called an embarassment
>>
>>4338572
If you ask me they were massively overvalued.
>>
>>4338578
Look given our future prosperity is currently dependent on it we should just be really fucking thankful that someone somewhere is somehow willing to pay thousands for Super Robot Pilot merchandise...
Wait a sec
This is really really suspicious isn't it
>>
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Rolled 10 (1d10)

>>4338572
MUCH LATER. AFTER THE FIGURES ARE SOLD

"Er. Sis. To rebuild our island. We're in dire need of resources. To accomplish this. We've managed to scrounge up enough to devise [my roll] possible job(s) for your consideration"
>>
Rolled 96 (1d100)

>>4338600
Sure, whatever, give me a list.
>>
Rolled 29 (1d100)

>>4338600
Shoot...that's a lot of jobs
>>
Rolled 60 (1d100)

>>4338600
10 jobs huh? That better not include one saving those gay elves again
Look let's just cut to the chase and pick the most sinister one
>>
>>4338606
"Of course. They are:

.Steal a precious artifact from a museum
.Rob a heavily secured bank
.Takeover the criminal underworld of a city
.Dominate an underground fighting tournament
.Steal experimental weapons from scientists
.Loot space materials from a recent meteor crash site
.Unearth ancient undersea ruins
.Rob an armed resource convoy
.Kidnap a high value target for ransom
.Start a legit business to generate cash on the side
>>
Rolled 1 (1d100)

>>4338622
Uhhh...lets rob a bank, others will get those heroes think were one of them and embarrass us further in the eyes of villain organization mom and dad are a part of
>>
Rolled 77 (1d100)

>>4338622
Space materials?...
MUAHAHA YES
ADDITIONAL ALIEN RAGE
Although new weapons tech sounds useful and underground fighting sounds fun
>>
Rolled 48 (1d100)

>>4338622
The way we're going, we'll probaly end up stealing from the villains. So undersea ruins?
>>4338633
Dad isn't a member
>>
>>4338637
Meh, I got a one anyways
>>
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>>4338636
"Well, excuse me for going into tutorial mode but..."

Generally, you can have the USSR do all of the jobs. The catch is, whichever one you choose personally to participate in, you'll play through that mission.

While the other jobs, you'll roll a d100 against my d100 to see if it's a success or not. But, you can assign the unique named skellies to each mission to increase your bonus for that roll. Each named skelly will give a different bonus depending on the mission. You can even stack multiple ones on a mission to increase success rate. Naturally, number of named skellies are limited. Use them all and you may have to roll with no bonuses for any remaining missions.

You can, of course, take the named skellies with you on your personal mission to increase your mission's success rate too.
>>
Rolled 12 (1d100)

>>4338622
Why don't we start up our own little imperial japan here? We can let Marian partially redeem himself by creating skelebot infiltrators for us to disguise themselves as human. We'll open establishments over the world, stores selling cheap shit or even our own galaxy burger and have the bots man them while Marian, VP and Director oversee it. The bots will across the world will send all the revenue back to the island gained.
>>
Rolled 43 (1d100)

>>4338646
I assume that if we send the ones who are better at that kind of work then we'll have a better bonus?
>>
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>>4338656
Of course.

VP, Director and Chosen One are more suited for "subtle" jobs that require less direct confrontations and more stealth. They'll give a +30 bonus each if put on one. If not then each of them is only worth +10

Luke, Lilly, Olessa and Betty are better at more direct approaches. Jobs that has more action and fighting.They'll give a +30 bonus each if put on one. If not then each of them is only worth +10

Quattro and Rasputin are wild cards. With Quattro, when you put him on a job. Roll a separate dice and chose odds or evens. If it rolls out the number you chose, then Quattro will be at the top of his game, giving a +40. If not then Quattro is not drunk enough. Or too drunk. Depends. And only give a +15 bonus.

Rasputin gives a +50 to whatever mission he's put on
>>
Rolled 73 (1d100)

>>4338685
Let's sort out which ones require more fighting, which ones require more stealth and which can't really be sorted into either category
>>
Rolled 83 (1d100)

>>4338685
>>4338649 So combine some sort of option 10 selling [??? Quattro's addictive cocktails maybe] with a covert bot army for future surprise conquest? Not a bad idea... How bout: Marian and Director do that
Boy wholesomely "borrows" museum artifact
Luke robs bank
Quattro joins fight club
Rasputin fucks up convoy
Chosen One steals weapon tech
VP picks up space rock
Betty helps which whichever of the above 2 [tech/spacething] is more heavily guarded
Olessa and Lilly kidnap Elon Musk or the Pope or whoever
Bobby goes to the undersea ruins and hopefully drowns I guess
Criminal underworld just have the drones do for now
Not sure which we as Glorious Leader should tag along on and play through though
>>
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>>4338702
Boosh
>>
>>4338724
Ah fuck that's not what I guessed - revising
>>
Rolled 53 (1d100)

>>4338724
ROb the bank! We need the dosh
>>
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Well now. Since it's 4AM over here. I'll go to sleep. We'll probably continue in about 12 hours. Or around that time. Mull over your choices and whatevs til then. nighty night

https://twitter.com/notapaladin
>>
>>4338724 >>4338707
Okay let's have Lilly and Olessa infiltrate the mafia/underground instead, swap it around and have the grunts do the kidnapping.
Maybe move Betty to fight club too if the rock-getting and tech-robbing missions don't have an assault component, and then Shotasniffer goes along with one of those two.
Or we could help rob the bank too I suppose, that would be cool - seems like we might be better off elsewhere given the prize is just money though - maybe instead Betty could help with whichever out of the bank and the fight club is more lucrative...
What say you anons, c'mon rip and tear me
Also thankee to OP
>>
>missed whole ending and Luke's Obari pose
well at least my dices didn't screw anyone over.
Bread soon, time to fuck things up
>>
Rolled 8 (1d100)

>>4338743
you up, OP?
>>
>>4339835
Perhaps
>>
Rolled 64 (1d100)

>>4339856
>>4338770
>>4338707
aight, let's do what this anon planned
>>
Rolled 45 (1d100)

>>4339856
Now you're down
>>
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>>4339857
OR

you could all give OP your money
>>
Rolled 92 (1d100)

>>4339859
nah, go away todd howard
>>
Rolled 48 (1d100)

>>4339859
Fine, here
>>
Rolled 79 (1d100)

>>4339859
how much is needed for RRP2
>>
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>>4339861
No
>>
Rolled 97 (1d100)

>>4339865
besides, we don't even have money for todd howard/OP to steal
>>
Rolled 85 (1d100)

>>4339865
while we arguing against todd, people already selling our miniatures and we are hot topic among the world as renown heroes who stopped mechapocalypse
>>
Rolled 81 (1d100)

>>4339865
Don't worry guys I'll chant Todd's banishment invocation. Ahem hem hem mem.... Fallout New Vegas
>>
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>>4339869
>>
Rolled 42 (1d100)

>>4339878
>>4339870
>>
Rolled 65 (1d100)

>>4339878
let's get back to our sentai skeleton team of heroes
>>
>>4339878
>>4339871
>>
>>4339886
>>
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>>4339880
>>
Rolled 80 (1d100)

>>4339889
dice betrayed you?
>>
Rolled 30 (1d100)

>>4339890
>>4338685
What about Boy, Marian and....Bobby
>>
Rolled 90 (1d100)

>>4339890
start legit business of selling skeleton based goods
>>
Rolled 10 (1d100)

>>4339891
I don't know, I thought for sure I inputted it right
>>
>>4339894
And only that?
>>
Rolled 33 (1d100)

>>4339899
Yes
all resources into that
>>
Rolled 81 (1d100)

>>4339899
Start communist Imperial Japan >>4338649
>>
>>4339900
we have enough for 10 jobs
>>
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>>4339901
With what resources? These missions are planned because be dont have enough crap to rebuild
>>
Rolled 27 (1d100)

>>4339905
>>4339893
>>
Rolled 28 (1d100)

>>4339905
Fine, Quattro and Rasputin on making dojo public as business
Luke Lilly Olessa Betty on take over criminal overworld
vp director and chosen one on stealing experimental weapons
>>
Rolled 8 (1d100)

>>4339905
Is there anywhere in the island to mine stuff at? We can make a small start by selling away junk rocks and then use that money to invest in opening our establishments and start from there
>>
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>>4339909
And ya just gonna leave the other ones?

Refer to Chosen One's exposition:
>>4338646
>>4338685
>>
Rolled 40 (1d100)

>>4339915
fine, attach loud ones to loud stages, sneaky to sneaky ones (randomly), and quattro and rasputin and betty will be doing dojo business like in good old days
>>
Rolled 24 (1d100)

>>4339915
Here's my solution.
Betty/Rasputin to underground fighting tournament
VP/Chosen One/Director on robbing a heavily secured bank stealthily.
We have Luke/Lilly/Olessa unearth ancient undersea ruins
Then Quattro to start a legit business.
>>
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>>4339921
What about you. Shotasniffer? Will you be playing through a mission or are you delegating them all to underlings?
>>
Rolled 88 (1d100)

>>4339924
I'll go unearth ancient ruins cause it worked so well last time
>>
Rolled 53 (1d100)

>>4339924
>>4339922
oh to add on to my post, stealing some experimental weapons could be fun
>>
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>>4339925
What's the worst that could happen?

Accidentally unseal Grandpa too?
>>
Rolled 16 (1d100)

>>4339933
Why not at this point
>>
Rolled 67 (1d100)

>>4339933
depends on which grandpa
>>
>>4339933
Surely Grandpa is actually a radical down to earth guy and not like Grandma
>>
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>>4339935
>>4339939
>>
Rolled 95 (1d100)

>>4339943
Everyone's assigned their mission.
Also, let's promote Luke because he did really well in the Robopocalypse
>>
Rolled 86 (1d100)

>>4339943
wait, who are you even
>>
Rolled 95 (1d100)

>>4339943
>>4339944
give him a sausage
year supply
>>
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>>4339944
Of course. The mission of giving OP all your cash.

Also Luke's getting promoted

"Really?"
>>
Rolled 23 (1d100)

>>4339950
Well, yeah, don't think your dragon wrangling skills have gone unnoticed
>>
Rolled 5 (1d100)

>>4339950
yeah dude, you came up with the plan to take down Clippy
can he get like a new outfit or something
>>
Rolled 85 (1d100)

>>4339950
yeah, lett me what you want and I'll give it to ya
>>4339951
you are cursed
>>
Rolled 40 (1d100)

>>4339950
Congratulations, our new janitor

>>4339954
I hate this posting box so much
>>
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>>4339954
"Well, uh. I dunno. Bone Kingdom gets more standing in the USSR i guess. Oh and maybe a cool title"
>>
Rolled 80 (1d100)

>>4339962
Well it's not the sub-area that fucks things up so I guess that's reasonable
>>
Rolled 99 (1d100)

>>4339962
make bone kingdom an autonomy region and give them a bit of land
Luke's title will be Dragon Sausager
>>
Rolled 37 (1d100)

>>4339962
Lord Protector of the Bone Kingdom!
>>
Rolled 33 (1d100)

>>4339962
Sure, Bone Kingdom gets exactly two quarters more of the island and you get to be your own Duke within your own duchy inside the kingdom, Luke

You are hereby Duke Luke from now on
>>
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>>4339964
>>
Rolled 23 (1d100)

>>4339969
I think he likes it
>>
Rolled 3 (1d100)

>>4339969
Also the two sub-commanders of the GSG get autonomy from Marian
>>
Rolled 31 (1d100)

>>4339969
Also give this man new better armor
>>
Rolled 34 (1d100)

>>4339969
>>4339972
yeah, what this guy said
Luke's been dying for an upgrade
>>
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>>4339974
"Hmmm, whu? Sorry, what did you say?"

"You're getting a new armor, Luke"

"Oh cool!.....psst, hey Olessa"

"Yeah?"

"Do we even have enough resources to even make a new armor"
>>
Rolled 5 (1d100)

>>4339980
make it out of sausages
>>
Rolled 45 (1d100)

>>4339980
I mean there should be a supply of Fuckyousite with us
>>4339971
>>
Rolled 62 (1d100)

>>4339980
Well we have all these destroyed robots lying about, that's premium metal right here!
>>
Rolled 44 (1d100)

>>4339980
We'll forge it out of Clippy Prime's remains
Also give this man a swiss army knife with a BBQ fork fold out.
>>
Rolled 71 (1d100)

>>4339983
>>4339980
Yeah, we'll scavenge some resources off these bots, especially Clippy Prime
>>4339984
>>
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>>4339983

And so the Bone Kingdom forges Luke's new armor out of the mecha parts.
>>
Rolled 65 (1d100)

>>4339988
now loading Luke's new appearance
>>
Rolled 12 (1d100)

>>4339988
WOOOO, YEAH, FORGING!
>>
Rolled 91 (1d100)

>>4339988
>>4339989
with budget
>>
Rolled 15 (1d100)

>>4339988
I hope it has spikey punching gauntlets
>>
File: 1.png (827 B, 500x500)
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>>4339993
>budget

oh no the game crashed
>>
Rolled 22 (1d100)

>>4340003
come on, OP
it was just commissioned elsewhere JPEG of an armor for promotion purposes
*real product quality may vary
>>
File: 100 dollas.jpg (40 KB, 570x252)
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Rolled 10 (1d100)

>>4340003
Hey OP, check out what I have!
>>
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>>4340006
You think we had enough money for a jpeg?
>>
>>4340013
I can agree on .tiff
>>
Rolled 32 (1d100)

>>4340013
Yes, I got, like...20 cents and...hold on let me count the coins
>>
Rolled 92 (1d100)

>>4340013
>>4340014
fug
>>
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>>4340015
>>
Rolled 3 (1d100)

>>4340021
let's roll for anon coins to afford very compressed jpeg
>>
Rolled 56 (1d100)

>>4340021
A dollar, I got a dollar, now wait...two dollars and thirty cents, that's enough for a somewhat fancy postcard, so its enough for a jped, or maybe even png dare we dream
>>
Rolled 85 (1d100)

>>4340021
slip OP a 100 so we can get see Luke already
>>
>>4340022
Everyone roll a d100
>>
Rolled 62 (1d100)

>>4340026
>>
Rolled 11 (1d100)

>>4340026
>>
Rolled 57 (1d100)

>>4340026
>>
Rolled 44 (1d100)

>>4340026
>>
>>4340027
>>4340028
>>4340029
>>4340030
Ah yes. We have a budget of.....174 cents
>>
Rolled 72 (1d100)

>>4340031
Luke beats the shit out of OP for delaying
>>
Rolled 88 (1d100)

>>4340031
that's like half of original SRP3 budget
>>
>>4340031
Good enough for a postcard, good enough for a jpeg
>>
Rolled 56 (1d100)

>>4340036
>>
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>>4340033
We could probably get at least 1 jpeg! Yay!
>>
Rolled 3 (1d100)

>>4340038
>>4340032
>>
Rolled 88 (1d100)

>>4340038
Such a good news!
I hope anon won't bump into someone and all coins fall down the drain, run towards nearest fantasy artist, quickly
>>
Rolled 66 (1d100)

>>4340038
Alright, there we go, now get to work OP you lazy cow
>>
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>>4340040
Can anon save us?!
>>
Rolled 19 (1d100)

>>4340046
HASHIREEEEE
oh look a poak bun
>>
Rolled 37 (1d100)

>>4340046
ANON SAVES US
>>
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>>4340048
Ah yes. Luke's new armor!

Practically the same except with some changes
>>
Rolled 75 (1d100)

>>4340050
scroll a bit to the right
>>
Rolled 11 (1d100)

>>4340050
wait a minute you trying to trick us here, OP
show us the uncropped image
there's more to the right side
>>
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>>4340051
>>
Rolled 37 (1d100)

>>4340053
Now we are talking.
go for 3, it has a lot of surface for grilling sausages
>>
Rolled 69 (1d100)

>>4340053
Good, 2, makes him look even more like a medieval LARP-er and keeps his helmet
>>
Rolled 71 (1d100)

>>4340053
I personally like two
>>
Rolled 93 (1d100)

>>4340053
I'll take numbah 2 thank you very kindly
>>
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>>4340056
>>
Rolled 21 (1d100)

>>4340064
won't fur get in the way of eating sausages tho
>>
Rolled 57 (1d100)

>>4340064
final selection, let's do this
>>
Rolled 47 (1d100)

>>4340064
Yes
>>
Rolled 17 (1d100)

>>4340064
Dew it faget
>>
Rolled 16 (1d100)

>>4340064
Yeh
>>4340065
Don't worry, Luke is a professional
>>
>>4340073
>eating sausages so not only fur gets in the way but also that greeze won't get on fur
hard mode if I've seen any
>>
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>>4340066
>>
Rolled 58 (1d100)

>>4340080
Ok, then we give the subcommanders of GSG autonomy because clearly Marian can't manage shit
>>
Rolled 14 (1d100)

>>4340080
They throw a party for Luke and their new land and autonomy, whole Bone Kingdom is celebrating with parades and such. Official Holiday day established
offscreen
>>
Rolled 74 (1d100)

>>4340080
Alright, back to the missions. we gotta make money.
>>4340081
oh for sure, we can promote VP to President
>>
Rolled 53 (1d100)

>>4340077
PROFESSIONAL
>>4340080
Looking fresh
>>
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>>4340083
>promote VP to President
>>
Rolled 85 (1d100)

>>4340091
VP did you just have that drawing of you for such an occasion
>>
Rolled 74 (1d100)

>>4340091
GOD BLESS THE USAAAAAAAA
for reals though, he needs a nice suit like Marian's but better and cool sunglasses maybe
>>
Rolled 74 (1d100)

>>4340091
Seems about right, Marian...you are demoted to CEO of fuck up until you redeem yourself, VP, Director, you are now his supervisors and CEO's of Green
>>
Rolled 41 (1d100)

>>4340091
run for president of USA
>>
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>>4340093
>>
Rolled 98 (1d100)

>>4340099
This looks more like a superhero costume than anythin-"BRAVE SKELETONS SAVE WORLD FROM EVIL ROBOT"
>>
Rolled 40 (1d100)

>>4340099
Good, cuz you and Director are CEO's now, Marian, you are CEO of fucking up
>>
Rolled 60 (1d100)

>>4340099
dream big
but so far your job is to fix marian mess lol
>>
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>>4340102
>>
Rolled 49 (1d100)

>>4340112
Anyway
>>4340103
>>4340104
And we have to deal with those missions with the reputation we have now, shit
>>
Rolled 98 (1d100)

>>4340112
Maybe hero association give us some funding
I mean, we can ask, no risk in that
>>
>>4340112
What? Oh no, they are back!
>>
Rolled 99 (1d100)

>>4340115
>>
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>>4340116
Gotta shoot down them HeroTV Cameras

Anyway. What was the mission plan again
>>
Rolled 99 (1d100)

>>4340119
>>4339921
>>4339925
This I guess?
Except I think Betty should be assigned to a mission with action separate from Rasputin and Quattro
>>
Rolled 50 (1d100)

>>4340121
no, betty and quattro must be together
>>
>>4340124
shut up quattro, betty's way too angry right now
>>
>>4340126
no
>>
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>>4340121
Really now
>>
Rolled 96 (1d100)

>>4340128
Fine, Quattro must better himself to suprise Betty later on
rock in confirm
>>
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>>4340129
Indeed, Quattro must butter himself
>>
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>>4340132
OP plz
He almost got it last time
believe in Quattro
>>
Rolled 16 (1d100)

>>4340132
Mmm...butter
Also, i have a feeling ancient undersea ruins are going to be the most dangerous, Shotasniffer should just kidnap a high value target instead while we send Marian and Bobby to do it
>>
Rolled 95 (1d100)

>>4340132
>>4340134
well this is awkward
>>
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>>4340135
But Marian's in intensive care due to the brutal spanking and ass beating he received! And Bobby's in the gulag! Sending them in this state into the undersea ruins would be giving them a -50 malus! It's like you want them to be trapped undersea or something.

You wouldn't do that, would you?
>>
Rolled 17 (1d100)

>>4340139
yea, they'll just be forced to listen shotasniffer best hits on a loop
>>
Rolled 38 (1d100)

>>4340139
Ok, maybe just Bobby.
>>
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>>4340141
Anyway

Quick question. Odds or Evens?
>>
Rolled 46 (1d100)

>>4340143
evens
>>
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Rolled 17 (1d100)

>>4340145
Evens huh. Lessee
>>
Rolled 90 (1d100)

>>4340147
welp
>>
Rolled 33 (1d100)

>>4340147
Hey,we still have the boost from rasputin
>>
OP is too busy butchering dogs, please understand
>>
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>>4340148
Such a shame. Quattro's feeling under the weather.
>>
Rolled 41 (1d100)

>>4340162
What are the chances that most of the targets are backed by villains at this point
>>
Rolled 79 (1d100)

>>4340162
dang it
also that's fucking neat 3x3 you glorious bastard
>>
Alright. So.

Rasputin and Quattro reopens the dojo, but now it's open to all who wants to kick ass and take names accross the world. They may come to train or to even challenge Quattro or Rasputin. If this gets big enough, the brothers can even host their own tournament. A combined bonus of Rasputin's 50 and Quattro's 15 gives this a +65 bonus

Vice Pr...I mean, the new President of the GSG forms a crack team of infiltrators to sneak into a museum and steal precious artifacts. +30 bonus

Olessa and a regiment of Maid Knights will rob a large bank. +30 bonus

Betty will join an underground fighting tournament. Winning it will give both money and increases her rep in the martial artist world. +30 bonus

Luke will bust up the local mafia and then from there move to take over the criminal underworld of the city. +30 bonus

Director will lead a team to retrieve alien materials from a government protected crash site. +30 bonus

Chosen One will sneak into a top secret research facility and steal its experimental weapons. +30 bonus

Lilly will intercept and armed transport convoy with her squad of Maid Knights. +30 bonus

Bobby gets dropped into the ocean. No bonus
>>
Rolled 23 (1d100)

>>4340170
>>4340163
>>
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>>4340170
AND NOW....I gotta go deal with some irl family stuff. So thread will continue....tomorrow night. In about 24 hours or somesuch. Rolling will commence then.

updates: https://twitter.com/notapaladin
>>
Rolled 65 (1d100)

>>4340170
what next?
>>
>>4340174
I bet quattro just drank too much during celebrations
thanks for bread OP, glad was catch up
>>
>>4340176
to REALLY thank me, you can make a small donation of 1 million dollars
>>
>>4340178
your paypal account can't accept more than few hundred bux until you sent your passport in
sorry
>>
Rolled 89 (1d100)

>>4340174
where's OP
>>
>>4342179
Occupying the crapper.
>>
>>4342184
hurry up and take a shit then
>>
>>4342195
it's a delicate process, don't hurry him
>>
>>4342195
Leave him be, he's probably taking a nuclear dump. Don't you know how powerful those can be?
>>
>>4342270
>>4342261
RIP OP
>>
Rolled 66 (1d100)

>>4342282
get back to work
>>
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>>4342284
ssssh. Be quiet. Im hiding from anons
>>
Rolled 25 (1d100)

>>4342286
anons show up
>>
Rolled 48 (1d100)

>>4342286
Why not just wear Groucho glasses?
>>
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>>4342287
>>
Rolled 59 (1d100)

>>4342292
anons grab OP
>>
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>>4342293
>>
Rolled 86 (1d100)

>>4342296
they shove him back into gulag to work on adventure
>>
Rolled 34 (1d100)

>>4342296
Let's unearth the ancient undersea ruins as Shotasniffer now.
>>
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>>4342298
Alright. Whatchu wanna do first.

Roll for one of the missions. Or play through your own mission.
>>
>>4342312
can we play thru dojo?
if not - roll for dojo
>>
Rolled 61 (1d100)

>>4342312
>>4342317
fug
>>
Rolled 73 (1d100)

>>4342312
Lets follow Chosen One
>>
Rolled 29 (1d100)

>>4342312
>>4342299
>>
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Rolled 47 (1d100)

>>4342322
Alright. Chosen One's scoping out the tech lab.

Roll 2d100

+30 bonus
>>
Rolled 68, 56 = 124 (2d100)

>>4342328
easy enough for us
URAH~!
>>
Rolled 53, 23 = 76 (2d100)

>>4342328
>>
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>>4342329
Alright. Chosen One has found a gap in their security. A hole in their daily schedule to exploit in order to infiltrate the facility.
>>
Rolled 24 (1d100)

>>4342340
install heroes of might and magic 3 to distract them further
>>
Rolled 37 (1d100)

>>4342340
Any info on their secret weapons?
>>
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>>4342348
They're developing a.....

Roll 2d100

1-30: New type of power armor
31-50: New type of armored assault vehicle
51-70: Bio Weapons
71-85: Black Hole cannon
86-100: Eh, you choose
>>
Rolled 99, 53 = 152 (2d100)

>>4342355
>>
Rolled 25, 45 = 70 (2d100)

>>4342355
does black hole cannon goes with huckebein
>>
>>4342356
>bio weapons
wait I thought we were the bad guys
>>
>>4342360
we're the heroes apparently
>>
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>>4342356
>>4342360
"Remind me again. Why exactly are we growing self regenerating mounds of flesh?"

"I told you, man. We're gonna solve the food crisis! Infinite flesh means infinite meat!"

"Clearly there's no way this can go wrong whatsoever"
>>
Rolled 58 (1d100)

>>4342375
It goes horribly wrong
>>
Rolled 41 (1d100)

>>4342375
the flesh thing breaks out of its holding
>>
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>>4342377
"Sir. We've got the latest reports.....The meat made from the flesh mound.....tastes like ass"

"Like, in a good way?"

"No, sir"

"Damnit"

"Oh and it maaaaaay have some weird side effects."

"Such as?"

"Wellll....."

The side effects are:
A. Puts the eater in a zombie-like state. Not really granting them real undead, but makes them slow, docile unless provoked, no senses or pain inhibitions. Will still die normally if killed
B. Makes the eater hyper aggressive while still retaining some cognitive abilities. Can still talk and think somewhat. Just that all thoughts lead to murder
C. The eater explodes after about an hour
D. The eater gets super cancer and fucking dies
E. The eater is turned into a writhing mass of flesh that would soon gets choked by their own flesh bits
>>
Rolled 9 (1d100)

>>4342397
E. The eater is turned into a writhing mass of flesh that would soon gets choked by their own flesh bits
>>
Rolled 87 (1d100)

>>4342397
A + B sometimes
>>
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>>4342400
"....the meat make whoever eats it get into a weird trance. They become super docile. Almost braindead. Starts drooling everywhere. The subjects become slow and somewhat unresponsive to most outside stimuli. But if provoked they go into this blind rage and will start attacking the offending provoker until it's gone. When they're like this, they exhibits no signs of pain or inhibition, regardless of the actual damage their body is receiving."

"Dammn. Anything else?"

"Wellll, sometimes, in rare cases, instead of going into the trance, subjects would retain their cognitive abilities, able to think and talk. But still gets the hyper aggression and pain ignorance, causing them to become bloodthirsty killers sooner or later"

"Well that fucking blows"

"Let's lock this thing up and think of what to do with it tomorrow"
>>
Rolled 21 (1d100)

>>4342407
When they leave, it's time to infiltrate!
>>
Rolled 10 (1d100)

>>4342407
That would definitely be something to disporve the fact that we're heroes
>>4342409
>>
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Rolled 33 (1d100)

>>4342409
Yes. When it's the scientists' leaving time, a truck delivering materials would come and make the week's shipment. The Chosen One could utilize this chance and use the truck to get inside. They haven't expected any skeletons to get in so their current detectors won't work on him.

ROLL 2d100

+30 Bonus
>>
Rolled 67, 6 = 73 (2d100)

>>4342418
Absolutely no problem with this bonus
>>
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>>4342419
Chosen One has successfully infiltrated the facility and is done with this leg of his quest.

NOW, we can go back to the others. Or keep rolling.
>>
Rolled 20 (1d100)

>>4342428
Queen Lilly!
>>
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>>4342431
Ah yes. Lilly, with a regiment of Maid Knights, prepares to attack a heavily armed resource convoy
>>
Rolled 85 (1d100)

>>4342447
CHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGE
>>
Rolled 38 (1d100)

>>4342448
ROLL 2d100

+30 bonus
>>
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>>4342454
Ah shit dropped my pic
>>
Rolled 27, 88 = 115 (2d100)

>>4342454
>>4342455
ow
>>
>>4342457
>>4342455
nice fuckin roll
>>
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>>4342457
THE ATTACK COMMENCES! BONE KINGDOM TAKES OUT THE REAR GUARD!
>>
Rolled 18 (1d100)

>>4342462
"OH SHIT IT'S A HERO"
>>
Rolled 45 (1d100)

>>4342462
LAUNCH CATAPULTS TO TAKE OUT THEIR HELICOPTERS!
>>
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Rolled 14 (1d100)

>>4342466
ROLL 2d100

+30 bonus
>>
Rolled 91, 86 = 177 (2d100)

>>4342472
oh, no fucking problem
let's go Lilly
>>
>>4342473
My god
>>
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>>4342473
>>
Rolled 93 (1d100)

>>4342476
Start slashing until we get to the main convoy truck
>>
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Rolled 21 (1d100)

>>4342478
CONTINUE THE ASSAULT!

ROLL 2d100

+30
>>
Rolled 51, 37 = 88 (2d100)

>>4342487
WE ARE SMASHING THEM
>>
Rolled 51, 5 = 56 (2d100)

>>4342487
Screams of masked men fill the skies
>>
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>>4342488
RIP masked mercs/security guards

Lilly seems to have things under control for now.

Wanna switch back to one other mission for the night?
>>
Rolled 32 (1d100)

>>4342496
>>4342491
what this anon picks, I'll go with
>>
Rolled 22 (1d100)

>>4342496
This is going to be some elaborate trap for the siblings, but Betty
>>
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>>4342501
>>4342502
Arright then!

Betty tracks down an underground cage deathmatch tournament. Highly illegal. Highly dangerous. Highly profitable. Perfect to let out some aggression and put her Skeleton island tourney experience to use.
>>
Rolled 59 (1d100)

>>4342516
Whose our opponent?
>>
Rolled 64 (1d100)

>>4342516

We ready for this
>>
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>>4342518
Yes. Who will Betty fight?!

. Hell's Chef
. Kung Fu Killer
. The Eagle
. Cyclops
>>
Rolled 92 (1d100)

>>4342530
Carl :D
>>
Rolled 72 (1d100)

>>4342530
>>4342532
NOT CARL
>>
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>>4342532
FUCK OFF CARL NOBODY LIKES YOU
>>
Rolled 9 (1d100)

>>4342539
It's a free-for-all and all of them are contestants
Even Carl.
>>
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>>4342543
>>4342543
>>
Rolled 19 (1d100)

>>4342548
And of course, they beat him up first
>>
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Rolled 69 (1d100)

>>4342550
Roll 2d100

Betty have +30 bonus

Carl has -15 malus
>>
Rolled 3, 21 = 24 (2d100)

>>4342556
>>
Rolled 55, 73 = 128 (2d100)

>>4342556
Fuck
>>
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>>4342559
Damn man, I can't believe Carl is fucking dead
>>
Rolled 99 (1d100)

>>4342562
A short prayer before we start to fight each other
>>
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Rolled 1 (1d100)

>>4342564
When you're done mourning.

Roll 2d100

+30 bonus
>>
Rolled 95, 58 = 153 (2d100)

>>4342570
>1
They somehow completely ignore Betty and attack each other
>>
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>>4342571
BETTY HAS WON THE FIRST ROUND YEA!
>>
Rolled 21 (1d100)

>>4342588
looks like betty's handling pretty well
>>
Rolled 97 (1d100)

>>4342588
So...who's next?
>>
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>>4342591
Whoever's next, will be decided.....next time! Tomorrow! Probably the same start time as this session! See ya then

https://twitter.com/notapaladin
>>
2 hours
>>
>>4344073
how it's been going in general OP
eating your veggies?
fatting up those nearby dogs?
>>
>>4344074
Perhaps
>>
>>4344153
threads are nice, but take care of yourself first
>>
here we go
>>
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>>4344178
Are we? Are we really going?
>>
Rolled 37 (1d100)

>>4344181
we are going home to dojo
>>
Rolled 6 (1d100)

>>4344181
kinda, to the next match
>>
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>>4344182
"Alright Quattro. Got any ideas for our new and improved Skeleton Dojo 2.0 ?"

"hmmmmmmmmm"
>>
Rolled 69 (1d100)

>>4344191
how about Quattro's Definitely Not Evil Dojo
>>
Rolled 17 (1d100)

>>4344191
How about to gain popularity and such, we come up with various fights using furniture Jackie Chan stiyle.
I think it'll be great advertisiment
>>
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>>4344196
"Quattro's Definitely Not Evil Dojo?"
>>
Rolled 30 (1d100)

>>4344203
Well we need to advertise it
>>
Rolled 89 (1d100)

>>4344203
>>4344197
nah, renaming won't do anything good.
First we need students with actual money.
Let's produce a commercial like in old chinese movies
>>
Rolled 72 (1d100)

>>4344203
No, wait...skeleton dojo! What was you dojo called when I first took it? Maybe we can combine the names or something
>>
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>>4344205
"hmmm, you got a script in mind, or are we just gonna beat the crap out of eachother?"
>>
Rolled 74 (1d100)

>>4344212
Quattro musters his knowledge of Jackie Chan movies and comes up with a script.
Which may or may not feature Street Fighter cosplay
>>
Rolled 40 (1d100)

>>4344212
First we choose who shall be the hero and who the villain and get appropriate costumes, like intimidating cloak and mark for a villain and...something for the hero
>>
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Rolled 90 (1d100)

>>4344213
Roll 2d100

Combined, the brothers have a 65 bonus
>>
Rolled 78, 76 = 154 (2d100)

>>4344220
genius writing skills, righ here
>>
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>>4344223
"hmmm yes. Big fight all over the place..... Environmental usage.... You'll be cosplaying chun-li at the end....I see"
>>
Rolled 85 (1d100)

>>4344233
*pencil breaks*
>>
Rolled 94 (1d100)

>>4344233
Sadly Betty has her own mission, so someone have to do it.
Also good reference for the viewer.
>>
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>>4344236
"Speaking of which. What's up with you and Betty? Still hasn't forgiven ya?"
>>
Rolled 62 (1d100)

>>4344253
yea
I don't deserve forgiveness yet
I need to better myself
>>
Rolled 44 (1d100)

>>4344253
Nah, she's just really tsundere, not her fault she hates anything yellow
>>
Rolled 66 (1d100)

>>4344253
I guess so, she was always kind of a grump, but still such amount of anger is unhealthy, hope fighting ring helps her unwind
>>
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>>4344257
"But to be fair. Not alot of us look at you the same way after we saw you grovelling on the ground crying under big sis. Then curling up into the fetal position and sucking your thumb. While crying profusely"
>>
Rolled 43 (1d100)

>>4344258
that's why I need to get back on my feet
>>
Rolled 69 (1d100)

>>4344258
Betty is kinda the worst about it though, to the point she hates the color yellow
>>
Rolled 70 (1d100)

>>4344258
Rasputin, when things like alcohol, groovy music and surfing are threatened, I'm ready to do anything, ANYTHING, imagine if she was about to outlaw fighting
>>
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>>4344266
"I'll probably just punch her or something"
>>
Rolled 78 (1d100)

>>4344269
That's treason Rasputin
>>
Rolled 82 (1d100)

>>4344269
Wow you have no fear, would you punch dad
>>
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>>4344271
"Dad tells all of us to punch him. He just punches back. It's how we all trained, aint it"
>>
Rolled 42 (1d100)

>>4344273
What about mom?
>>
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>>4344274
"You never got powerbombed by mom?"
>>