OH SHIT NIGGER, you are SHOTASNIFFER. Eldest daughter of the skeleton villain LOLISNIFFER. After a long and arduous succesion war against your siblings, you now claim ownership of your family's island, as the leader of the UNITED SHOTA SNIFFING REPULIC. From here, you shall spread your skeletal power accross the globe and dominate the world!In the last episode you and your younger siblings ventured into the neighboring islands to take down your grandma, who also happened to be an ancient evil, that you unleashed. One of your second in command and your younger brother, Rasputin, has been converted to her side! He also managed to beat up your other brother, Quattro, that yellow pile of bones over there. Now he's aiming for you!
Rolled 78 (1d100)>>4082411We're a leader, get Marian and Lilly to help out for a combo attack!
>>4082412Lilly jumps into the fray! Marian slowly follows behind."Dunno sis. You look like you got things under control"
Rolled 26 (1d100)>>4082420Fuck it, quick combo attack with Lilly!
Rolled 824 (1d1000)>>4082422Roll 2d800!Your number will be the sum of both rolls+200 For you final result+800 For Rasputin
Rolled 312, 466 = 778 (2d800)>>4082428URAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH LET'S DO THIS SISTER
Rolled 712, 418 = 1130 (2d800)>>4082428Let's see if all that LARPing paid off
Rolled 53 (1d100)>>4082442Pour some vodka over Quattro so we can get him back in the fight! We need ALL our main siblings to fight Quattro to even stand a chance.
Rolled 35 (1d100)>>4082442Tell Marian to make himself useful by getting back in the sub and trying to shoot him from thereMeanwhile: sister combo attack, Take 2
>>4082444>ALL our main siblings to fight QuattroOf course! Beating up Quattro would raises morale so you can fight Rasputin better!
Rolled 43 (1d100)>>4082448haha oh shit, I meant Rasputin OPdamn, I'm tiredPlease pour vodka over Quattro so he can help us fight Rasputin
Rolled 36 (1d100)>>4082448If that's the case send him to try and sort out great-G-ma by getting her drunk. She could benefit from some of his chill
>>4082449The alcohol activates Quattro's regen
Rolled 42 (1d100)>>4082454Now help him up so we can take on Rasputin together!
Rolled 44 (1d100)>>4082454Try 3-way sibling combo
>>4082458Roll 3d600Your number will be the sum of the rolls+300 For you final result+800 For Rasputin
Rolled 33, 212, 175 = 420 (3d600)>>4082468COME ON QUATTRO, LILLY!
Rolled 855 (1d1000)>>4082468Whoops, forgot muh dice
Rolled 341, 416, 376 = 1133 (3d600)>>4082468Drunken Medieval Communist Kick!
>>4082472We need our techboy capitalist to join usWe need ALL the main siblings
>>4082474So you're saying, some sort of Drunken Medieval Cyber Communist Suplex? Agreed.
Rolled 57 (1d100)>>4082485MARIAN GET YOUR BUTT IN H--oh who am I kidding -- GET YOUR BUTT TO THE SUB AND START ZAPPING
Rolled 59 (1d100)>>4082485GET MARIAN IN HERE AND ATTACK RASPUTIN FROM FOUR DIFFERENT DIRECTIONS!
Rolled 74 (1d100)>>4082485Consider our options
>>4082494NO MORE SHOUTING YOU FOOL
Rolled 54 (1d100)>>4082485Unleash big authority hat missile! If we have it that is...
>>4082494▶ Fight!▶ Combo!▶ Call backup!▶ Order artillery strike!▶ Genuflect▶ Run!
Rolled 40 (1d100)>>4082498▶ Order artillery strike!Yeah that sounds good
Rolled 63 (1d100)>>4082498>>4082500 -- this but combine with attack from Marian's sub, immediately followed by punching from others
>>4082500TARGET:▶ Rasputin- The area around Rasputin- Quattro- Marian
Rolled 99 (1d100)>>4082504Target RASPUTIN>>4082503BUT THIS TOO
Rolled 56 (1d100)>>4082504Quattro
>>4082504>>4082505 ...yeah what he said>>4082508 (although this is tempting)
Rolled 626 (1d1000)>>4082505Roll 2d1000The result will be the sum of your 2 rolls! Highest one gets itYou have +500 Bonus!Rasputin has +800!
Rolled 326, 13 = 339 (2d1000)>>4082514BOMBS AWAYURAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
Rolled 31, 345 = 376 (2d1000)>>4082514
Rolled 373, 388 = 761 (2d1000)>>4082514
Rolled 665, 775 = 1440 (2d1000)>>4082514This oughtta knock the old lady outta ya
Rolled 778 (1d1000)>>4082519THE VOLLEY LAUNCHES HIM INTO THE AIR! HE'S TAKEN DAMAGE! BUT WILL TRY TO DO AN AIR-TO-GROUND COUNTER STRIKE!ROLL 2D1020 TO TAKE DEFENSIVE ACTION+200 you+800 Rasputin
Rolled 985, 585 = 1570 (2d1020)>>4082523
Rolled 735, 660 = 1395 (2d1020)>>4082523Not on my watch
>>4082523>autoloss againCrap... Save us Uncle Simon!
Rolled 29 (1d100)>>4082536Well, we've exhausted our options.>Genuflect
Rolled 85 (1d100)>>4082536LAST RESORT TACTICSHOW THE PICTURE OF BOY TO RASPUTIN!
Rolled 27 (1d100)>>4082536AUTHORITY HAT MISSILE
>>4082539But this is one of your most treasured belongings!
Rolled 71 (1d100)>>4082549... We have to give it up just this oncewe can take more later
Rolled 53 (1d100)>>4082549*ahem* I mean -- give it a thorough sniffing first (as if you hadn't made copies) and be ready to give him a combined sub-zap and authority-hat-dakka-if-it-exists as soon as he shows any weakness
>>4082553Yes. Come to terms with it....As surely this is the only photo you have of the demon boy. You're not THAT much of a degenerate are you?
Rolled 21 (1d100)>>4082559Agreed. Now, USE IT TO SNAP RASPUTIN BACK TO NORMAL!
Rolled 67 (1d100)>>4082559>>4082555
Rolled 77 (1d100)>>4082559Just throw it at Rasputin's face, the longer you think the harder it will be
Rolled 23 (1d100)>>4082559Fold it like a paper plane and throw it to Rasputin
Rolled 2 (1d100)>>4082559"YES YOU ARE">>4082555>>4082560
Rolled 688 (1d1000)>>4082562Roll 2d1000!+500 For you!+150 For him!
Rolled 832, 798 = 1630 (2d1000)>>4082567COME ON RASPUTINRA-RA-RASPUTIN
>>4082569oh no, you threw it too hard
Rolled 75 (1d100)>>4082570that ain't right, OPshow him getting turned back to our side after seeing the picture of boy
Rolled 39 (1d100)>>4082570choke OP
Rolled 59 (1d100)>>4082570Quick, grab his skull, before it reattaches!
Rolled 85 (1d100)>>4082570Fortunately Quattro caught it
>>4082571>that ain't right, OPyes it is
Rolled 5 (1d100)>>4082578BEHIND YOU OP
Rolled 36 (1d100)>>4082578While OP's distracted with the arguing with anon, the Chosen One switches Shotasniffer and Rasputin's combat bonuses
Rolled 28 (1d100)>>4082578>>4082574 + >>4082581
Rolled 60 (1d100)>>4082585Meanwhile, Mariam gets thrown to the battle by his own subordinates
Rolled 58 (1d100)>>4082585Chosen One also replaces all of OP's pron with skeletons
Rolled 19 (1d100)>>4082585Someone catch that damn photograph!
>>4082589"QUICK! MARIAN! WHILE HE'S DISTRACTED!""Wait wha--"
Rolled 24 (1d100)>>4082595If Marian can beat Rasputin while he's distracted, he'll level up from beating someone way more experienced than him!
Rolled 61 (1d100)>>4082595The rest of the group misunderstands, and thinks Marian wants to solo Rasputin. They let him.
>>4082599"oh fuck" whispered marian
Rolled 50 (1d100)>>4082604Where's Bobby
Rolled 14 (1d100)>>4082604Can Marian muster the courage????
>>4082605He took a while to heal
Rolled 9 (1d100)>>4082609>>4082606Simon gives him confidence
Rolled 86 (1d100)>>4082609Simon reminds Marian not believe in himself, but to believe in Anime.
Rolled 28 (1d100)>>4082610>>4082609UNCLE SIMON ENCOURAGES MARIANCOME ON
Rolled 98 (1d100)>>4082611Uncle Simon starts yelling about animeRoll 2d100 to see if it helps marian
Rolled 93, 80 = 173 (2d100)>>4082616>>4082616>98Goddamnit Marian
Rolled 62, 57 = 119 (2d100)>>4082616long shot
Rolled 55, 99 = 154 (2d100)>>4082616ROW ROW FIGHT THE POWER
>>4082621Haha well it sorta worked...
Rolled 16 (1d100)>>4082621>Top 10 Anime Betrayals>>4082625Marian's sweat activates his secret eye laser, shooting Rasputin in the back
Rolled 16 (1d100)>>4082625>>4082625You can do it, just remind him more about Boy
Rolled 673 (1d1000)>>4082628ROLL 2D1000!MARIAN HAS +100 BONUS!RASPUTIN HAS +200
Rolled 4 (1d100)>>4082625Quattro picks up the photograph as Marian is distracting attention
Rolled 88, 311 = 399 (2d1000)>>4082636
Rolled 190, 3 = 193 (2d1000)>>4082636COME ON MARIAN AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Rolled 902, 883 = 1785 (2d1000)>>4082636
>>4082644>>4082636>green colored name>rolls high for Marianoh SHIT NIGGA
>>40826444You're pretty good
Rolled 780 (1d1000)>>4082644It's a hit! The eye beam blows up that part of the battleground! Rasputin is caught in the blast!ROLL 2D1000 FOR THE COUNTER ATTACK!+100 marian+200 Ras
Rolled 288, 563 = 851 (2d1000)>>4082649MARIAN MARIAN MARIANLET'S FUCKING GO BROTHERIF YOU BEAT RASPUTIN 1 on 1, I'M PROMOTING YOU
Rolled 379, 740 = 1119 (2d1000)>>4082649Shit
Rolled 205, 43 = 248 (2d1000)>>4082649>881oof
>>4082663Does anyone else here have memories of Boy that can break his concentration?
Rolled 23 (1d100)>>4 >>4082665>>4082663
Rolled 92 (1d100)>>4082663Rasputin's punch rattles Marian's cybernetics, activating his rib-mounted machine guns.
Rolled 31 (1d100)>>4082676Are you fucking serious, Marian
Rolled 27 (1d100)>>4082676RATATATATATATATATA
Rolled 62 (1d100)>>4082676FINISH HIM OFF NOW MARIAN
Rolled 46 (1d100)>>4082676The best nipples>>4082592 while shooting occurs
Rolled 391 (1d1000)>>4082678"If Astro Boy can have machineguns in his ass. I can have miniguns for nipples"ROLL 2D1000
Rolled 342, 157 = 499 (2d1000)>>4082686GO MARIAN, THIS IS YOUR CHANCEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Rolled 512, 447 = 959 (2d1000)>>4082686
Rolled 12 (1d100)>>4082688RASPUTIN TOOK THE FULL VOLLEY OF MINIGUN FIRE! roll 2d100 for seemingly no reason
Rolled 67, 92 = 159 (2d100)>>4082693Very uncomfortable silence
I dont know what this quest is, but its FUCKING AWSOME
>>4082695You need to read more than a hundred threads from various previous quests just to become a lore novice
>>4082694OH SHIT MARIAN SHOT RASPUTIN TOO HARDBOY'S PHOTO IS DESTROYED!
Rolled 87 (1d100)>>4082700MARIAAAAAAAN
Rolled 14 (1d100)>>4082700Roll to avoid a hysterical breakdown
Rolled 95 (1d100)>>4082700Hey, I triedNothing for it now but for Marian to KICK SOME ASS AND/OR ARSE
Rolled 23 (1d100)>>4082700Shotasniffer remains eerily calmAs she slams Marian's sub onto him and Rasputin
>>4082701RASPUTIN TAKES EXTRA MENTAL DAMAGE!AND SO DID SHOTASNIFFER!
Rolled 81 (1d100)>>4082706"Why would sis faint?" - Lilly
Rolled 41 (1d100)>>4082706Great Grandma's corruptive ooze leaves Rasputin and tries to infect Marian, who is clearly the superior warrior
Rolled 10 (1d100)>>4082706Big authority hat missile fires at Marian
>>4082711"We'll tell you when you're older, Lilly""Just know that your sister isn't allowed within 1 mile of a school zone"
Rolled 1 (1d100)>>4082721>>4082713
Rolled 13 (1d100)>>4082721Nobody wants to look Marian in the eye after what happened
Rolled 57 (1d100)>>4082723I'll roll for you!
>>4082724Well yeah! He's a skeleton, he only got...eye sockets!ba dum tishthe cyber eye doesn't count because shut up
Rolled 67 (1d100)>>4082732"SHUT UP MARIAN."
Rolled 52 (1d100)>>4082732Inspect Rasputin to see if he's been defeated.
Rolled 67 (1d100)>>4082732VP and Director feel respect for Marian for the first time in forever.Betty glares at Quattro.
>>4082736The skellies shut Marian up
Rolled 10 (1d100)>>4082748Right, is Rasputin okay?
Rolled 7 (1d100)>>4082748This somehow returns Rasputin to normal
Rolled 11 (1d100)>>4082748>>4082751>>4082752
Rolled 83 (1d100)>>4082748Quattro tries to prove Betty wrong that he's not a failure by delivering the finishing blow to Rasputin.
I'm not sure I've ever laughed this hard at a quest before.
>>4082751IS HE?! STEP RIGHT UP AND SPIN OP'S WHEEL OF WONDERS>>4082756OR PERHAPS THE COUNCIL OF ANONS WOULD LIKE FOR QUATTRO TO REDEEM HIMSELF....by hitting an unarmed man.....already on the ground.....taking mental damage.....in addition to all the other built up damage from before.
Rolled 87 (1d100)>>4082759That is retarded, we spin the wheel, after replacing al no with yes>>4082756Ur dumb lol
Rolled 28 (1d100)>>4082759We pull out Quattro's signature move on Rasputin. Hug.That will surely bring him back to our side.
Rolled 89 (1d100)>>4082759Nah, Quattro gets tangled in Marian's shin-mounted grappling hook and can't finish off his brother, which would have been a dick move anyway. then >>4082741
>>4082763"Wouldya look at that, VP, Marian finally did something""Tangling up Quattro?""No, actually contributing to a team fight""Huh? Yeah. That he did. Wow, didn't actually expect that. I feel....proud somehow.""Yeah, doesn't it makes you feel all happy inside, bro?""Yea""Doesn't that make you feel a sense of pride and accomplishment?""Weird choice of words, but yea!""Doesn't it make you wanna make out with your sister""Ye--wait what"
Rolled 31 (1d100)>>4082768What?...RASPUTIN
Rolled 9 (1d100)>>4082768>>4082769
Rolled 80 (1d100)>>4082768The skellies are so disorganized right now. Imagine if the ancient evil showed up right now to destroy them when they are at their weakest. Would be absolutely terrible
Rolled 58 (1d100)>>4082768How is Great Grand-tower doing?
Rolled 49 (1d100)>>4082768Oh no, the Great Gam-Gam's control goo has left Rasputin and are in the Director!
>>4082773Yes indeed.Anyway. ROLL 1d100TO SPIN OP'S PIZZA OF FORTUNE. HIGHEST GETS IT90-100: Cool beans50-89: uh oh1-49: uh oh spaghetti-os
Rolled 27 (1d100)>>4082777
Rolled 98 (1d100)>>4082777
Rolled 90 (1d100)>>4082777PASGHETTI
Rolled 21 (1d48)>>4082777
>>4082781Wait no, that can't be right. Lemme fix that
Rolled 37 (1d100)>>4082786OP BEHIND YOU
Rolled 39 (1d100)>>4082786S H O O T
Rolled 1 (1d100)>>4082786OP, I'm gonna call the communist party and tell them that you are implying that communism can be defeated
Rolled 85 (1d100)>>4082786Mushroom pizza
Rolled 1 (1d100)>>4082786op accidentally turns the roll into a 100
>>4082789>>4082792>try to challenge OP>immediately roll a critfailBrehs.... be careful
Rolled 57 (1d100)>>4082793back to story
Rolled 59 (1d100)>>4082793Now OP, how's Rasputin?
>>4082796"ugggh...my skull....Where am i?"
Rolled 1 (1d100)>>4082804On the island, not our island or the grill one where Quattro started out, but the grandmas one
Rolled 46 (1d100)>>4082804The Chosen One explains everything while everyone else tries to wake up Shotasniffer
>>4082807Yeah a--OH SHIT
Rolled 48 (1d100)>>4082809>The jojo stand intro-stat thingy they have in between scenes sometimes appears before we return to the story
Rolled 26 (1d100)>>4082809>>4082814MEANWHILE IN SHOTASNIFFER'S COMA DREAM
Rolled 17 (1d100)>>4082809The old lady! Evasive manoeuvers!
>>4082814YEs....That will appear.........whthe story actually resumes. Somewhere tomorrow. Probably around the current time right now. Cuz I gotta get back to the gula---I mean work.updates b here: https://twitter.com/notapaladin
>>4082829is shotasniffer still unconscious
>>4082832Perhaps. it is a mystery
>>4082748Even when they win, Marian and Quattro have no dignity.
Funny because the two of them are the only ones to hit Rasputine. The sisters kinda failed hard.
>>4084403honestly its better this way.Both of them need the self esteem boost.
>>4084403They're the Polnareffs
>>4084648fuck off nig
>>4084858Why the hostility
>>4085158These jojofags always infest the place, and are responsible for terrible names>Marian G Kujo>Green Stardust Giantsstupid stupid
>>4085168I agree, Marian sucks
>>4085168>>4085201You guys just don't like Green, dontcha
>>4085202Everyone knows yellow is the best color
>>4085261So which color is it then
>>4085270go back to your historical rants on youtube, I need more stuff to listed during work
>>4085268Not him but blue. That said, any color is good so long as it isn't a pastel: those colors half-ass everything.
Quattro is worst character
>>4085640By which criteria? There are many...
>>4085649He is worst because I say so and I'm the boss, and what the boss says goes.
>>4085685Well that means you are wrong and one of those semi-senile old men who run companies into the ground
>>4085708The boss can't be wrong, it don't work like that. Quattro is worst character and best character is torn between Luke and Marian. I'm automatically correct and you can't speak otherwise.
>>4085729I agree with Luke, but not Marian, so I quit and go to another job boss, Marian is funny for his tantrums tho
>>4085768You don't quit, you're FIRED
I thought shitpost hours were after OP finishes up the thread
>>4086031Shitpost hour is every hour
it's been 500 hours
>>4087021Is it tho>>4087022Are you tho
Rolled 94 (1d100)>>4087036maybe
Rolled 89 (1d100)>>4087038If <50 then you are not ready
Rolled 72 (1d100)>>4087036yep
>>4087042We're ready to bone
>>4087042>fuck opget back to the plot>>4082814you promised this
Rolled 83 (1d100)>>4087042>>4087047
>>4087050>you promised this
Rolled 69 (1d100)>>4087051>>4082829also I have this big bag of dog meat to give you
>>4087053Ah yes. I promised stand stats would appear....whenever the story resumes.So that means if I don't continue the thread, I don't have to fulfill my promises. Of course!
Rolled 50 (1d100)>>4087056op please
Rolled 65 (1d100)>>4087056dewit
>>4087060>>4087057"Escape", you say? Don't mind if I doooo
Rolled 6 (1d100)>>4087061OP SHE'S OUTSIDE THE WINDOW
Rolled 12 (1d100)>>4087067>female protagonist beats the shit out of OP for delayingEvery time
Rolled 52 (1d100)>>4087067Oh shit nigger no escaping now
Rolled 58 (1d100)>>4087083>red background is OP's blood after shotasniffer was done with himBack to the plot
>>4087086Alright. Rasputin got his mind back. Grandma's control over him has subsided
Rolled 8 (1d100)>>4087097What's Quattro confused about?
Rolled 66 (1d100)>>4087097But we lost Boy's photo
>>4087103+900 mental damage
Rolled 12 (1d100)>>4087097Quattro has a drink to recover
Rolled 71 (1d100)>>4087106At least we still have the totally not creepy idol in our house
Rolled 80 (1d100)>>4087111Anyway....Roll 2d100 to resist further mental damage
Rolled 68, 23 = 91 (2d100)>>4087121
Rolled 26, 54 = 80 (2d100)>>4087121
Rolled 37, 17 = 54 (2d100)>>4087121
Rolled 44, 58 = 102 (2d100)>>4087121f
>>4087123The mental damage has rendered you blind!With rage.Will you punch Marian for destroying your treasure?
Rolled 64 (1d100)>>4087131Marian: "oh crap"
Rolled 93 (1d100)>>4087131Punch the ground, which causes an earthquake
Rolled 26 (1d100)>>4087137You are now Marian.Your elder sister, Shotasniffer, has punched the ground in anger, causing an earthquake.Roll 2d100 to escape danger
Rolled 3, 12 = 15 (2d100)>>4087144hide behind quattro
Rolled 77, 12 = 89 (2d100)>>4087144Guess that jogging was useful, huh
Rolled 49, 8 = 57 (2d100)>>4087144Fug.
Rolled 48, 49 = 97 (2d100)>>4087144Oh shit
>marian>escaping from dangershould've guessed it
>>4087146You no longer control Marian
Rolled 90 (1d100)>>4087163Alright gang, let's split up and look for clues.
Rolled 28 (1d100)>>4087163Back to everyone else
>>4087172"She's staying inside that giant evil spire in the middle of the island, sister. Not much else to go" says Rasputin
Rolled 31 (1d100)>>4087180Is that why her tentacles seem to come from everywhere
Rolled 25 (1d100)>>4087180Alright guess we just go for it and head over there.
>>4087184"Yes. She's been sealed away for a very long time. So now she's...hungry, to say the least. From her spire she spreads her influence across this island. Draining the life from the very earth of this place and corrupting it into her own image. She can also do this to sentient creatures. And if she wills it, she can put said creature under her control. Like what she did with me"
Rolled 55 (1d100)>>4087199Could we just bombard the whole place? Do you think that would work
Rolled 98 (1d100)>>4087199So, pretty much like Dad
>>4087203We tried that in the first thread, didn't work
>>4087205"I....fail to remember when dad could do any of that. Especially the tentacles. He definitely doesn't have any of those"
Rolled 92 (1d100)>>4087212I mean both being completely evil.
>>4087215"It runs in the family, I suppose. So now what's the plan?"
Rolled 57 (1d100)>>4087221We punch her who are controlling anyways?
Rolled 64 (1d100)>>4087221We need someone to be the bait for Grandma so that we can catch her in a surprise attack.And by someone I mean Bobby.
Rolled 56 (1d100)>>4087221Just leave her, the problem will solve itself.Now call in for transport back home
Rolled 51 (1d100)>>4087221Can't really do much until we figure out a way to either cancel out her influence or feed her full. Wish granpaps were still around; he'd know what to do.
Rolled 80 (1d100)>>4087234>inb4 Grandma sniffs guys like Bobby
Rolled 88 (1d100)>>4087234GET HIM
Rolled 91 (1d100)>>4087234"Alright Bobby, let's show them what you're made of" says Quattro to avoid himself being the bait.
Rolled 51 (1d100)>>4087234Grab Bobby and throw him at the spire's doorstep
>>4087238"R-really bro? you want me to go because you want me to prove my power? And in turn prove that we yellows are nothing to scoff at?""Uh, yeah sure. Go get em, champ""I won't let you down, Quattro"
Rolled 6 (1d100)>>4087244The rest are already planning his funeral.
Rolled 48 (1d100)>>4087244Give him words of encouragement, and that if he does a good job Quattro will make a drink for Bobby himself.
Rolled 66 (1d100)>>4087244Who are we controlling now anyways?
>>4087251Nobody. Because I gotta take care of some family shit irl. Thread will continue in like, 12 hours or some shit. fuck.much apologies
>>4087255>taking care of family shit at 2 in the morning
>>4087255>taking care of family shit at 3 in the afternoon
>>4087257My brother's hungry so I gotta go find food
>>4087255>having a family
>>4087260Real Isopod Hours
>>4087255Imagine having a family. Imagine being alive. Imagine actually being made of matter. Imagine existing in the physical universe. I seriously, seriously hope you don't do this OP.
>>4087278imagine interacting with the electrons that make up a Burmese donut decorating forum.
possibly time again maybe
or this time
>>4088733op is like the dad who went to get cigarettes
>>4088756... what if his family killed him...?
>>4088756Don't worry son, I'll get that pack someday
Rolled 77 (1d100)>>4088777still a better dad than lolisniffer
Anyway, OP has went out for a pack of cigarettes. He'll be back shortly. Don't worry.
Rolled 59 (1d100)>>4088782OP LOOK OUT
Rolled 68 (1d100)>>4088784we now return to the adventures of booby and some other skeletons
>>4088787I meant bobby but who really cares about his name
Rolled 15 (1d100)>>4088793fits him , really
Rolled 95 (1d100)>>4088793You know what this guy needs? An ushanka.
Rolled 5 (1d100)>>4088793Great Grandma's tentacles begin pinching Bobby's cheekbones, allowing the others to infiltrate her tower
Rolled 81 (1d100)>>4088799go make quattro proud now
>>4088799>he doesn't like ushankaShit taste, booby.
Rolled 9 (1d100)>>4088810G. G-Ma hates Bobby's shirt, begins knitting him a sweater
Rolled 99 (1d100)>>4088811OH SHIT ROLL 2d100
Rolled 65, 53 = 118 (2d100)>>4088814>>4088816
Rolled 17, 15 = 32 (2d100)>>4088814>99this is gonna be one hell of a sweater
>>4088817BOBBY IS ASSAULTED BY TENTACLES! WHAT'S YOUR NEXT MOVE, SHOTASNIFFER?!
Rolled 14 (1d100)>>4088824infiltrate the tower while Bobby distracts them. While still super angry and sad about the picture thing.
Rolled 29 (1d100)>>4088824"Concentrate Bobby! You must harden your body against the tentacles!" says Quattro.Then while everyone's distracted they head towards the tower.
>>4088834*while the tentacles are distracted everyone heads to the tower.Sorry I literally just woke up.
>>4088834"I will! Don't worrryyyyyyy"
Rolled 42 (1d100)>>4088838Such a good boy. He will be rewarded after this quest. Let's get to granny.
Rolled 26 (1d100)>>4088838Guess grandma likes em young
Rolled 53 (1d100)>>4088838Simon explains that each floor of Grandma's Tower is protected by a guardian, who must be defeated before the group may pass. Since Rasputin is back to normal, the group must now face...A really fat cat!
Rolled 6 (1d100)>>4088845And his name is Garfield
Rolled 4 (1d100)>>4088850so we are going to assalt crazy old cat lady placegreaaat.
Rolled 11 (1d100)>>4088850Throw lasagna
Rolled 73 (1d100)>>4088850FIRE BIG AUTHORITY HAT MISSILE
Rolled 57 (1d100)>>4088850Timeskip past all the dumb guardians
Rolled 81 (1d100)>>4088850Lily tames the cat and gains a pet
Rolled 143 (1d1000)>>4088854Roll 2d1020
Rolled 199, 730 = 929 (2d1020)>>4088862
Rolled 294, 906 = 1200 (2d1020)>>4088862YES, THAT THING
Rolled 848, 435 = 1283 (2d1020)>>4088862Garfield stop eating my lasagna
Rolled 73, 758 = 831 (2d1020)>>4088862
Rolled 4 (1d100)>>4088874Next level
Rolled 23 (1d100)>>4088874Dash forward now, before we get bogged in the spire for 5 threads
>>4088879"Whaaaat? Me? Allowing such a thing? You're crazy"
Rolled 50 (1d100)>>4088882If you're so great, spill that whole box on us all at once then.
Rolled 30 (1d100)>>4088882destroy the box
Rolled 91 (1d100)>>4088882Next spire guard: Guy with a GILF fetish
Rolled 69 (1d100)>>4088882throw OP at the guard.
>>4088884Sure! Great Grandma decided to jsut use all the guards at once!
Rolled 36 (1d100)>>4088896Come up with a detailed battle plan to defeat all the guardians.Lily ruins it immediately and charges in.
Rolled 39 (1d100)>>4088896artillery strike this very convienent target
Rolled 88 (1d100)>>4088896Rasputin and the hat'll make short work of them
>>4088901"Errmmm...you want to bomb the tower...that we're currently inside too?"
Rolled 26 (1d100)>>4088912Maybe just shoot the top off of it
Rolled 86 (1d100)>>4088912yes.It makes perfect sense. Why bother going up when we can bring it down
>>4088916"Yes. Down...on top of our heads. If we're gonna do this anyway, why did we even have Bobby be bait so we can enter the spire? We could have done it from outside"
Rolled 98 (1d100)>>4088922Disregard that. It's more fun if we fight the baddies to get to the top anyways.
Rolled 83 (1d100)>>4088922we can always exitand come on, you are not scared of some shaking and rocks
Rolled 1 (1d100)>>4088922
wait why are we even suggesting aerial bombardment when the damn thing is protected by a dome of evil energy
Rolled 62 (1d100)>>4088940Go, Quattro!
Rolled 29 (1d100)>>4088940Rasputin has already punched them up pretty bad while you and Betty were arguing
Rolled 60 (1d100)>>4088940activate WOTE
>>4088941I see we're already starting off with our best fighter
Rolled 96 (1d100)>>4088955Quattro uses intoxicate - the guardians become super chilled
Rolled 969, 870, 933 = 2772 (3d1000)>>4088958ROLL 2D1000+50 for the guardians
Rolled 208, 67 = 275 (2d1000)>>4088962
Rolled 168, 169 = 337 (2d1000)>>4088962Jesus Christ OP
Rolled 386, 970 = 1356 (2d1000)>>4088962>1 autolossQuattro got at least 2 of them!
>>4088967make that 1
>>4088967Nice, we're not total failures
Rolled 613, 121 = 734 (2d1000)>>40889671 is drunk! It's too intoxicated to act! But the other 2 aren't! ROLL 2D1000!
Rolled 8, 533 = 541 (2d1000)>>4088976
Rolled 702, 692 = 1394 (2d1000)>>4088976Quattro is competent!
Rolled 328, 194 = 522 (2d1000)>>4088976EVASIVE MANEUVERS
>>4088978They missed! Could this be?! The redemption of Quattro?!
Rolled 50 (1d100)>>4088984IT IS!QUATTRO IS BACK BABY!ATTACK WITH ALL WE GOT!
Rolled 84 (1d100)>>4088984Use Spinning Bird Kick!
Rolled 35 (1d100)>>4088984Time for some hardcore Drunken-Fist-ing
Rolled 79 (1d100)>>4088984Proceed to convince drunk guardian to drop out of the fight and drink more
Rolled 147, 442, 222 = 811 (3d1000)>>4088989ROLL 2D1000!The 2 non-drunk guardians have +80 bonusThe drunk one has -20Quattro has a +40
Rolled 980, 840 = 1820 (2d1000)>>4088996
>>4088996To predict a bird-form devastation...
>>4088998Nice. Quattro is actually doing it.
Rolled 811, 950 = 1761 (2d1000)>>4088998Roll 2d1000 again for their counter attack!
Rolled 282, 622 = 904 (2d1000)>>4089009
Rolled 718, 151 = 869 (2d1000)>>4089009Damn these guys roll high. Zero chill
Rolled 351, 146 = 497 (2d1000)>>4089009QUATTRO USES COMPETENCY!
Rolled 47 (1d100)>>4089022man up, Quattro!This is nothing compared to your pain of losing it all.
Rolled 88 (1d100)>>4089022Drunk guardian suddenly attacks the other 2
Rolled 78 (1d1000)>>4089024Does he?!Roll 2d1000 to find out!
Rolled 505, 406 = 911 (2d1000)>>4089030
Rolled 456, 9 = 465 (2d1000)>>4089030Turns out he has same taste in booze as Quattro, and turncoats!find somewhere congratulatory yellow thsirt for bobby mk2
>>4089033YOU ALMOST KILLED US
>>4089036all well what ends well
Rolled 77 (1d100)>>4089045oh no you don't
>>4089045OP come on.What did Quattro ever did to you.
Rolled 25 (1d100)>>4089045>>4089047
Rolled 68 (1d100)>>4089045Nah - OP remembers drunken chicanery is fun, so he won't stand in its way
>>4089046nyeeeehhhhTHE DRUNKEN GUARDIAN BITES ONE OF THE NON-DRUNKEN ONES!
Rolled 33 (1d100)>>4089055Quattro man ups and starts believing in himself a little bit more, regaining his willpower!Use confusion to attack!
Rolled 63 (1d100)>>4089055Drunken Fist accompanies drunken bite
Rolled 671 (1d1000)>>4089057ROLL 2d1000!The one being bitten has a +40 bonus!
Rolled 541, 552 = 1093 (2d1000)>>4089060
Rolled 816, 876 = 1692 (2d1000)>>4089060
Rolled 217, 714 = 931 (2d1000)>>4089060
Rolled 76, 95 = 171 (2d1000)>>4089060Remember your old self, Quattro!
>>4089062"Amazing. Quattro is actually beating them!""Maybe he should have been this competent back when it actually would have helped""C'mon Betty, don't be too hard on your big brother""We all saw him crying and begging to big sis, Rasputin. While he was lying on the floor. In the fetal position."
Rolled 95 (1d100)>>4089076Betty you promised you won't tell anyone!For old times sake!
Rolled 33 (1d100)>>4089076>>4089080The guardians console him.
>>4089080"Tell what? Whatchu guys talking about?"
Rolled 85 (1d100)>>4089096Quattro wins his fight against the Guardians but unknowingly lost something else.
Rolled 77 (1d100)>>4089096kill guardians quickly so we can proceed and change flow of discussion away from you
Rolled 84 (1d100)>>4089096"Just observing that Quattro's got his mojo back and has bested all those things single-handed."
>>4089101Betty confides to the non-reds about Quattro's embarrassing episode of crying and begging Shotasniffer to have mercy on him and have him run the resort. Culminating in him curling up into her lap, thanking her amid tears while she pats his head. Quattro's reputation as a fighter go up!But the respect his siblings have for him go down.Don't tell him tho.
Rolled 2 (1d100)>>4089114The little bird that spinkicked the guardians consoles him.
Rolled 95 (1d100)>>4089114it's just setup for sequel quest of "Quattro's CounterAttack".
Rolled 9 (1d100)>>4089114>>4089116
Rolled 99 (1d100)>>4089114Quattro obliviously sips a cocktail as everyone ascends to face GG
>>4089117Which may or may not ends with a giant something being dropped onto the island. And Quattro disappearing into space.
Rolled 68 (1d100)>>4089127>>4089116
Rolled 24 (1d100)>>4089127Surely it won't end that way.That sounds like a plot of bad dissappointing movie of someone who prefers red color.
Rolled 10 (1d100)>>4089127>>4089120
Rolled 38 (1d100)>>4089140What happened to Marian, anyway, last we saw him he got caught in the earthquake.
Rolled 63 (1d100)>>4089140as long "Dark Prison" won't start playing, it's all good.
Rolled 21 (1d100)>>4089140>>4089142Probably crawled back to his sub. To Grandma!
Rolled 62 (1d100)>>4089140Give your bird friend a yellow hawaiian t-shirt
Rolled 71 (1d100)>>4089140Quattro obliviously sips a cocktail as everyone ascends to face GG - finding a battered Marian already at the top with nipples at the ready
>>4089142Oh, he's with the party. Don't worry. His subordinates are making sure of that
Rolled 34 (1d100)>>4089161Floor guardians defeated. Let's go see grandma.
Rolled 56 (1d100)>>4089161give Marian a drink
Rolled 100 (1d100)>>4089161
Rolled 49 (1d100)>>4089161More cocktails.More stair-climbing.More old lady fights.
Rolled 64 (1d100)>>4089161>>4089165wait forget that roll take this one instead>>4089164
>>4089164Of course. And since you're trying to make Marian NOT a drunken wreck, like a certain yellow alcoholic you know, all he's getting is this glass of water.
Rolled 97 (1d100)>>4089181SOCIALIST WATER*Grandma is suddenly terrified and she does not know why*
Rolled 38 (1d100)>>4089181Ascend the tower to Grandma(who just so happened to be changing attire)!
Rolled 81 (1d100)>>4089197OH GOD SHE CAN SPEAK
Rolled 25 (1d100)>>4089197>>4089199
Rolled 53 (1d100)>>4089197Quick! Take advantage of her terror with an all-red combo attack!also oh god with the speaking
>>4089199"Now. Where's your father, child?"
Rolled 28 (1d100)>>4089217Please explain why you would want to know his location
Rolled 2 (1d100)>>4089217I(the voice in my head that rolled this) don't know.
>>4089217"Right here"*unzips knuckle sandwich*
Rolled 74 (1d100)>>4089224And then I forgot the dice
>>4089220"Oh. We are a family, aren't we. I simply want to meet him. I've been sleeping for so long, after all. I have so much catching up to do"
Rolled 29 (1d100)>>4089235Like?
Rolled 31 (1d100)>>4089235Ask grandmother our species origin story
>>4089239"Nothing much. What's going on with the world. How's the family doing. What are my grandkids up to these days. How does he sleep at night knowing that I will grind his bones into dust for locking me up in that coffin. Is he eating right. That sorta thing"
Rolled 64 (1d100)>>4089253That tentacle to my left is getting awfully close to my cheek, grandma.
Rolled 56 (1d100)>>4089253Invite grandma to a tea party with all of her grandchildren
Rolled 53 (1d100)>>4089251This and also ask grandmother not to consume us
Rolled 68 (1d100)>>4089253So either we tell you and risk the wrath of Dad or we don't and risk the wrath of you.We really should ask ourselves what the fuck is wrong with our father's side of the family>>4089259
Rolled 48 (1d100)>>4089283Uh, Uncle Simon, any idea on what to do?
Rolled 52 (1d100)>>4089283AAAAH MY CHEEKSHER PINCHING POWER IS TOO MUCH
Rolled 10 (1d100)If grandmother is no longer cranky then it's all cool.
Rolled 32 (1d100)>>4089308OH GOD WHAT
Rolled 89 (1d100)>>4089308>>4089309
>>4089309"SHE'S DRAINING SHOTASNIFFER'S POWER EVEN MORE TO ASSUME A SOLID FORM! STOP HER!" Rasputin yells as he leads to Reds. and Simon, into the fray!Will the others help out Shotasniffer?
Rolled 73 (1d100)>>4089324Well yeah, she did promise them stuff.
Rolled 61 (1d100)>>4089324I guess we can everyone help her out
Rolled 44 (1d100)>>4089324I don't feel like Shotasniffer is in any real danger. This whole thing can be deescalated. Reeeal anticlimactic like.
>>4089331yes all we have to do is to tell grandma (real name unknown) where her son isAnd then run far away to escape the survivor's wrath when they clash.
Rolled 92 (1d100)>>4089324
>>4089327"FOR MONEY!""FOR BOOZE!""FOR MORE LENIENT BED TIMES!"
Rolled 31 (1d100)>>4089342Rescue interrupted: Bobby
inb4 they all get their cheeks pinched
Rolled 93 (1d100)>>4089342>>4089343 What about Bobby
>>4089343Bobby, haggard and battered , jumps in and yelled"GUYS WAIT! DON'T HELP HER! SHE'S AN ASSHO--oh shit"His sudden appearance surprised the rest of the siblings and they crashed into him, tumbling into a corner of the spire
Rolled 29 (1d100)>>4089359BREAK OUT OF HER GRIP NOW NOW NOW
Rolled 57 (1d100)>>4089359Quattro jumps on grandma and puts her in a choke hold.
Rolled 9 (1d100)>>4089359That boy ain't right. Meanwhile >>4089364.
>>4089370Quattro is currently being stuck under his siblings. At about here
Rolled 47 (1d100)>>4089359what the fuck does this bitch want
Rolled 93 (1d100)>>4089381>the rest of the siblingsSIMON'S STILL MOVING FORWARD
>>4089385CAN SIMON SAVE HIS NIECE WITH THE POWER OF ANIME AND PROFESSIONAL WRESTLING?!
Rolled 43 (1d100)>>4089403Stand and spiral power active
Rolled 14 (1d100)>>4089410
>>4089408WILL SIMON BE ABLE TO SAVE HIS NIECE?!WILL SHOTASNIFFER SUCCUMB TO GRANDMA AND FEED HER POWER?!WILL THE OTHER SKELLIES GET OUT OF THE JAM IN TIME?!FIND OUT NEXT TIME! ON SKELETON ISLAND 2, PART 3because it's almost 4AM so i gotta sleep to not fuck up my liver. toodlesupdates r here: https://twitter.com/notapaladin
>>4089359>"GUYS WAIT! DON'T HELP HER! SHE'S AN ASSHO--oh shit"Wait which one is he talking about
>>4089439Surprised Shotasniffer's sensitive skeletal schnozz is tolerating old granny smell, the very antithesis of shota scent.
>>4089893shotasniffer you lorelet
>>4090074forgive me for not knowing that bobby's hate for shotasniffer overrides stopping our grandma from gaining power and consuming us all
It's (not) time
>>4090493There is an override of Quattro
>>4090970Indeed it is, how terrible
Rolled 6 (1d100)>>4090983back to simon
Rolled 43 (1d100)>>4090983Continue
>>4090987Con....tinue? What does this word mean?
Rolled 13 (1d100)>>4090989here. let grandma teach you
Rolled 2 (1d100)>>4090996back to simon
>>4090997Simon has mysteriously fallen down the stairs
Rolled 10 (1d100)>>4091005SERIOUSLY, UNCLE?
>>4091007Of course. This will all be retconned, if you make a small transaction to OP's offshore banking account
Rolled 49 (1d100)>>4091013WHEN I FREE MYSELF FROM GRANDMA'S CLUTCHES YOU WILL PAYAFTER BOBBY FOR BEING A FUCKING ASSHOLE
Rolled 14 (1d100)>>4091013You can get 1 skellies. That's it.
>>4091017If you make a small payment of 59.99$ then you can escape grandma's clutches
Rolled 18 (1d100)>>4091024Get angry at OP's jew tactics, Simon's sudden failure, your sibling messing up their rescue and your grandma reminding you of your abusive dad with the way she treats you.REALLY angry.
curse stronkOP's net failed
>>4091054Edward was great, Dai was alright even if lacking screentime and Fester was definitely memorable
Rolled 46 (1d100)>>4091024Become grossed out by Grandma scebt
>>4091024OP's greed was his downfall
>>4091747Turns out the commies were displeased with OP's delaying and greed so they cut off his internet
>>4091872And then he disappeared, with a photo of the little boy the only clue.
>>4091024Down with the bourgeois OP, we’ll take the means of questing
Rolled 20 (1d100)>>4092965>>4091024All the power to the /qst/ proles
This whole delaying thing isn't funny anymore
Just give him the money damn you
Should we hold funeral service?
>>4091005A SKELETON HAS FALLEN DOWN THE STAIRS IN LEGO CITY
>>4093446Here lies OP, he ran fast, and died a melon.Say your last goodbyes now before we bury the hatchet.
Guess we will never know how the skeleton world was saved
Not like it matters
>>4093487He was a fag, but he was our fag
OP is going to walk into his own funeral in a hawaiian shirt and shotasniffer is going to kill him again
Call gramps to put the moves on grandma. It’s obvious she is cranky because she hasn’t gotten gramps bone for awhile.
Have a random confession from a lurkerI like to lurk to shamelessly steal Ideas for characters, plot and such to use for my DnD sessions with friends
>>4093765He pulls a fricking Joseph joestar
>>4094050I recall OP's vampire hunter adventure got thousands downloads, I bet china already made bootleg game about them
>>4094160Just wait until they sell doujins of the girls
>>4094192It's chinese we talk about here.Only party's approved doujins can be sold at local dog skewers joint.
>>4093487I claim shotsniffer as my own OC. Op said he would give me all rights to the character if he died in a text message the other day.
>>4094394Nuh uh, Shotasniffer belongs to me now you wanna fight about it?
Rolled 60 (1d100)>>4094406Throw down pussy
Rolled 17 (1d100)>>4094412Smoke you fucknut
>>4094412>>4094419Fuck. Okay fine you can have her. My dice always suck ass and lollipops anyways.
Rolled 97 (1d100)What if this was just some misunderstanding? What if Dad didn't lock grandma away, she put herself in a sensory-deprivation to train her spirit for 500 years but forgot? (still has 89 years left btw)
Here we go
>>4093487RIP OP.He was the best person I've ever known
Rolled 37 (1d100)>>4094760OP RISE UP
Rolled 81 (1d100)>>4094760OH NO
>>4094766Before he is buried. I would like to say a few words. OP was the greatest man I've ever known. He is truly the most awesome and amazing human bean to have ever lived and the most deserving....of your money.
Rolled 68 (1d100)>>4094771Open the coffin, I want to see him in full fat round glory
>>4094773I don't think that's a good idea, pal. There's a reason this is a closed casket funeral. OP's corpse is almost unrecognizable
Rolled 53 (1d100)>>4094781Anon starts chanting
Rolled 46 (1d100)>>4094781BEHIND YOU
Rolled 17 (1d100)>>4094781it can't be that bad.Come on, open it.
>>4094784Anons started chanting about something!I dunno wat tho, kinda hard to hear them in this weather
Rolled 53 (1d100)>>4094793suddenly paladins
>>4094795The paladins have also started chanting
Rolled 25 (1d100)>>4094801>>4094785
>>4094802Everyone turns around to look behind themselves
Rolled 21 (1d100)>>4094808NO YOU FOOLS, ITS A DISTRACTION!!!
Rolled 73 (1d100)>>4094808wait there is nothing there
>>4094813Really? That's pretty weird, you better keep looking
Rolled 80 (1d100)>>4094814THERE HE IS, GET HIM!
Rolled 31 (1d100)>>4094814GUYS! I found a donut under the coffin!this actually happened during my grandma's funeral lol
Rolled 22 (1d100)>>4094814get over here!Lure him with dog meat skewers
Rolled 30 (1d100)>>4094820Back to the sweatship!
Rolled 75 (1d100)>>4094820meanwhile real OP silently comes out of coffin, and that running one was just his hologram
>>4094825to fuck with you
>>4094823>implying i have enough money for a hologram
Rolled 55 (1d100)>>4094829Who is that then?
Rolled 70 (1d100)>>4094829so you just dug a route underneath anons back to coffin with your gulag skills?
Rolled 66 (1d100)>>4094829SKELETON RESCUE BATTLE
Rolled 45 (1d100)>>4094829Get back to the story before shotasniffer come back
>the entire first hour is people just messing around
>>4094838>this is messing aroundhow about whole thread till bump limit back on /v/ about character creation
>>4094839>whole thread is about selecting a little girl wizard companion and naming her>she then gets ditched immediately by one anon's vote
>>4094844We got an entire story with her at least
Rolled 48 (1d100)>>4094849start bread
Rolled 29 (1d100)>>4094849start a demo instead of real robot pilot season 2
Rolled 5 (1d100)>>4094849Quick, back to the actual story before she finds out
>>4094853>wanting real robot season 2>insteaad of super robot season 4
>>4094855super robot pilot season 4 pointless to start because we didn't get true ending in 3.also no budget for it
>>4094851Of course. Let's see...Simon was jumping into the fray! Trying to save his niece!>>4094850Ah yes. "Fuckoff". The first of the little girls.
>>4094857Season 3 wasn't really linked to the first 2 seasons so it's fine
Rolled 2 (1d100)>>4094860Engage with obscure anime references>>4094862it wasn't because we didn't get true ending tho
Rolled 43 (1d100)>>4094860>fuckoffThe first female human OP ever drewAnyway try to spinpunch with stand
>>4094864Blame the company for going overbudget with cameosNow the skeleton mafia is after them
>>4094868that would imply that there was a budget in the first place
>>4094872The entire budget was a loan from them
>>4094876then how could've they gone overbudget from basically only skeleton cameos, which probably were made to please said skeleton mafiasomething doesn't add up
>>4094883Turns out texas demanded a lot of money for his cameo, more than that of the loan
Rolled 728 (1d1100)>>4094865ROLL 2d1000!GRANDMA HAS +100 BONUS
>>4094883Most of it went into catering.And cocaine
Rolled 83, 717 = 800 (2d1000)>>4094888>828Shit
Rolled 493, 377 = 870 (2d1000)>>4094888
>>4094890No wonder, I thought the writers were on drugs when they wrote the idiot comic relief as the protagonist
Rolled 179, 711 = 890 (2d1000)>>4094888grandam grew up on better chinese cartoons>>4094887Goddammit texas>>4094890dang it
>>4094893GRANDMA IS HIT BY SIMON'S SPINNING DRILL PUNCH! BUT SHE SEEMS UNAFFECTED AS THE DRILL IS UNABLE TO GET THROUGH HER DEFENSES!
Rolled 20 (1d100)>>4094910Meanwhile, everyone else yells at Bobby to get over himself
>>4094912"B-but, Shotasniffer's a big meanie!"
Rolled 81 (1d100)>>4094919"That's because she never forgave you for tattling on her to dad for trying to get her own pony."
Rolled 31 (1d100)>>4094919Punch the monster
>>4094922"SHE NEVER HUGGED ME, NYYEEEHHH"
Rolled 59 (1d100)>>4094928Hearing this pushes Shotasniffer's already fragile temper to the limit
Rolled 10 (1d100)>>4094928Come on Bobby, that's no chill
Rolled 35 (1d100)>>4094954"Oh. Shit." - everyone else
Rolled 19 (1d100)>>4094954We use our newfound anger to punch grandma!
>>4094956"Shit. EVERYONE! HUDDLE UP! STAY BEHIND COVER!" Rasputin yells as he props up a chunk of the floor to make some make-shift cover for his siblings
Rolled 99 (1d100)>>4094973GRANDMAAAA, YOU OWE ME A PONY FOR THE MISSED BIRTHDAYS
Rolled 4 (1d100)>>4094973Scream Bobby's name as we punch Grandma in the face
Rolled 524 (1d1200)>>4094975ROLL 2D1020!YOU HAVE +500 BONUSGRANDMA HAS +200
Rolled 817, 65 = 882 (2d1020)>>4094996
Rolled 607, 579 = 1186 (2d1020)>>4094996ROOOOOOR
Rolled 997, 919 = 1916 (2d1020)>>4094996son of a >>4094998
Rolled 524, 863 = 1387 (2d1020)>>4094996
>>4095001OP, I'm pretty sure this roll shouldn't count. I think mine loosk better
>>4095001POW! GRANDMA HAS LOST HER GRIP ON YOUR CHEEK
Rolled 83 (1d100)>>4095018"Pizza delivery!"
Rolled 20 (1d100)>>4095018THERE'S ONLY ROOM IN THIS FAMILY FOR ONE WORLD CONQUERING SUPER BITCH!RIP AND TEAR!
>>4095021"Quattro! How cold you think about pizza at a time like this?""I crave pizza when i'm stressed"
Rolled 80 (1d100)>>4095036"At least think of weiners!"
Rolled 90 (1d100)>>4095036Meanwhile, the human prisoner is being forced to eat Hawaiian Pizza
>>4095044MEANWHILE, BACK AT THE MAIN ISLAND"So, how is our intruder doing?""He woke up for a bit but then passed out again when he saw the hawaiin pizza""Interesting"
Rolled 36 (1d100)>>4095055The minions inspect the camera's contents
Rolled 99 (1d100)>>4095055Meanwhile, we run out of budget for the grandma fight and have to cut corners
>>4095059ba dum tish
Rolled 43 (1d100)>>4095070yeah uhh. The fight happens
Rolled 79 (1d100)>>4095070VP activates one of Marian's contingencies, summoning the submarine as it transforms into:SUBBUSTER SEA
Rolled 48 (1d100)>>4095075NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO NO MORE MECS AAAAAAAH
Rolled 10 (1d1300)>>4095075THE SUBMARINE LAUNCHES ITSELF FROM THE WATERS AND FLIES TOWARDS THE SPIRE! WHEN IT GETS THERE IT WILL TRANSFORM INTO MARIAN'S NEWEST MECHA!roll 2d1000 against grandmaSubmarine has +50 bonusGrandma has +300
Rolled 272, 625 = 897 (2d1000)>>4095090
Rolled 529, 587 = 1116 (2d1000)>>4095090
>>4095103The sub makes its way to the spire unmolested! It will arrive in a few minutes
Rolled 55 (1d100)>>4095111Grandma retracts her tentacles from around the island, achieving her final form
Rolled 47 (1d100)>>4095111Cool...
>>4095118"Oh child. You have the family rage inside of you. You truly are your father's daughter"
Rolled 38 (1d100)>>4095129>She says as the sub-mech hits her in the sniffer
Rolled 96 (1d100)>>4095129Shotasniffer's too angry, just keeps punching
Rolled 761 (1d1400)>>4095139Roll 2d1020!+500 For you!+400 For Grandma!
Rolled 254, 649 = 903 (2d1020)>>4095148
Rolled 780, 138 = 918 (2d1020)>>4095148
Rolled 545, 761 = 1306 (2d1020)>>4095148so close >>4095154
Rolled 79 (1d100)>>4095163GET EVEN ANGRIER REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Rolled 29 (1d100)>>4095163Seal her back in her tomb
Rolled 19 (1d100)>>4095173Genuflect
Rolled 54 (1d100)>>4095173...wait, wait wait...is our granny taking over our body? If not then keep pounding in a not sexual way
Rolled 18 (1d100)>>4095173chokeslam Grandma all the way to the bottom of her spire
Rolled 1408 (1d1500)>>4095177"Ah, just like him. At least I know that our family line hasn't grown weaker over time"Roll 2d1200!+500 you!+500 Grandma!
Rolled 390 (1d1200)>>4095195nyeh
Rolled 26 (1d100)>>4095195>autoloss>just like him like himscream angrily
Rolled 324, 463 = 787 (2d1200)>>4095195SLAP HER ACROSS THE ROOM BITCH
Rolled 760, 251 = 1011 (2d1020)>>4095195
Rolled 36, 862 = 898 (2d1200)Can no one read?
2/5 rolled correctly.Wtf guys?
hello? autoloss department?
>>4095208>implying it matters
Rolled 99 (1d100)>>4095215Grandma reveals her new body
Rolled 74 (1d100)>>4095215"I just wanted a ponyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy"100% rage
>>4095218Ah shit, game's bugged
Rolled 74 (1d100)>>4095230What are the others doing in the meantime hiding behind the rock
Rolled 7 (1d100)>>4095230Simon rallies Quattro, Lily, & Marian. They must learn to fuse.
>>4095232"You guys okay down there?""Yeah. If big sis can distract grandma long enough. We would be able to initiate our surprise attack"Aaaand, I gotta suspend thread 4 now. It's 5:30 AM and I gotta get SOME sleep or else i'll be late for the labor camps when morning comes. WOuldn't want the communist overlords to get angry
>>4095249Damn, good thread OP
>>4095249>It's 5:30 AM and I gotta get SOME sleep or else i'll be late for the labor camps when morning comesit's already morning technically
>>4095249>5:30 AMGood to see your liver is well
>>4095036>quattro being lectured by his younger brotherTruly a new low
>>4094801Hey hey, you know why these paladins were shouting at OP? Cause he's notapaldin!I'll see myself out.
24 hours til bread continuesOr gets delayed for another monthdepends
>>4096052but depends on what
>>4096139but you can't depend on communism
>>4096052Here lies OP, his name didn't stand for Over Powered
>>4097927Ssshh. The stars have not yet alignedPErhaps....in a few minutes
Rolled 59 (1d100)>>4097929OP are you going mystical on us now
Rolled 4 (1d100)>>4097929However this story should continue from where it was left off, I say it should involve a walrus for no particular reason.
Rolled 7 (1d100)>>4097948timeskip
Rolled 44 (1d100)>>4097948Can you make the story continueBack to story
Rolled 64 (1d100)>>4097948>>4095249Let's get right back into it
Rolled 88 (1d100)>>4097952When is Marian coming in with his sub mech?
>>4097956Right after OP figures out what it's gonna look like in mech form.
Rolled 8 (1d100)>>4097957Aight, let's keep fighting Grandma in the mean time
Rolled 50 (1d100)>>4097957Initiate surprirse attack
>>4097960"Alright. Just gotta dig a tunnel underneath the floor and pop up behind her"
Rolled 86 (1d100)>>4097962DIG DIG DIG
Rolled 49 (1d100)>>4097962Parry the floor
Rolled 8 (1d100)>>4097963Roll 2d100
Rolled 10, 91 = 101 (2d100)>>4097976we digging
Rolled 76, 42 = 118 (2d100)>>4097976
Rolled 598 (1d1500)>>4097978>>4097982Congrats. Your siblings have managed to dig without falling onto the floor bellow. Using secret skeleton digging techniques.Anyway. Roll 2d1200 to not get punched by grandma+500 you+600 Grandma
Rolled 608, 622 = 1230 (2d1200)>>4097984PARRY, RIPOSTE HER PUNCH!
Rolled 501, 1096 = 1597 (2d1200)>>4097984FUCK
>>4097990>>4097986aw shit nigga we need another homie to roll
Rolled 363, 217 = 580 (2d1200)>>4097984
Rolled 62 (1d100)>>4097997OofLet's hope our siblings do better
Rolled 86 (1d100)>>4097997recover and land feet first, then attempt a charge
Rolled 265 (1d1700)>>4098003ROLL 2d1300!+500 you+700 Grandma
Rolled 197, 538 = 735 (2d1300)>>4098008
Rolled 915, 1241 = 2156 (2d1300)>>4098008
Rolled 790 (1d1800)>>4098015YOU LAND A MASSIVE BLOW! THE SPIRE SHAKES AND RUMBLES FROM THE SHOCKWAVE!SHE'LL ATTEMPT A COUNTER ATTACK! WATCHOUT AND ROLL 2d1300!+500 you!+800 Grandma!
Rolled 569, 58 = 627 (2d1300)>>4098022
Rolled 212, 636 = 848 (2d1300)>>4098022
Rolled 336, 1269 = 1605 (2d1300)>>4098022COME ON BOYSURAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
Rolled 274, 947 = 1221 (2d1300)>>4098022
Rolled 44 (1d100)>>4098036GET UP AND KEEP PUNCHING
Rolled 52 (1d100)>>4098036Resist
Rolled 51 (1d100)>>4098036Kick her in the box
Rolled 326 (1d1900)>>4098038ROLL 2D1300 TO RESIST BEATDOWN+500 you!+900 Grandma!
Rolled 280, 1158 = 1438 (2d1300)>>4098049JESUS CHRIST HER BONUS JUST KEEPS GETTING BIGGER
Rolled 364, 533 = 897 (2d1300)>>4098049
Rolled 322, 1228 = 1550 (2d1300)>>4098052WHY THE FUCK YOU ROLLING NIGGA>>4098049