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>>3505648

Actual Rules and how votes work here

We always roll 1d100’s!

The game will be divided into 2 parts. One is Johnny and Team actions, and the other is how the other teams are faring.

Johnny and Team will require a best of 3 to see if their actions are a success or not, which will catapult them to higher positions or will leave them behind. As always, this is a story-driven quest regardless if absurdity has taken over, what the prompts are describing is more important than how great the roll was.

The last few positions in the race will be in danger of dropping out completely, so be careful not to lag too much behind.

Now the second part is to aid or to sabotage the other teams! You will have one roll and you will select one team to support and one team to thwart. If you are the highest roll in this part you will help the team you want to go up some places – you can give teams a hefty lead as well!

If you are the lowest roll in this part, the team you decided to thwart will start doing poorly – it’s possible you can make the team lose the race completely.

Reminder: It’s not the highest voted team who will have been aided or thwarted. Just the one indicated in the post that has the biggest dice roll/ smallest dice roll. So you can be as selfish as you want.

Have fun!

>>3505648
>Yu Yan and Matilda
Despite not being entity users I consider them among the most competent members of our team

>>3505648
>Mom
>Amelia

>Pornstar and Mom
Sorry for re-doing this post three times in a row. Computer fucked up everything.

>>3505658
Since it seems we're in limbo I'll change to;
>Mom and Amelia
For a nice family ride, let's hope nobody dies in a car accident

>>3505648
>Yu Yan and Amelia

>>3505649
I vote for yu yan and Matilda too

>>3505704
I'll second this

>>3505649
Mom and Amelia

>>3505648
Mom and Matilda

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Mom and Amelia wins! The Family Ride is the confirmed team!

Now please select one of these cars!

Stats are completely meaningless, so don’t take them seriously.

Which vehicle do you pick?

>Write In.

>>3505769
>this car is actually shit

DEJA VU

>>3505649
Mom and Yu Yan

>>3505769
Outrun

Rolled 6 (1d15)

>>3505769
going for random select

>>3505769
>Blue Falcon
Who the fuck wouldn't want to ride one?

>>3505769
Wheelchair

>>3505769
>Giant Melodia

Best cat.

>>3505769
>7.- Lion thing
Shirooooooou!

>>3505769
Nina's Scooter so the family totem pole can T-pose for dominance.

>>3505769
Changing to lion thing

>>3505769
>Mom's hearse
Why the fuck are you guys not voting for this?

>>3505769
Nina's think

>>3505838
Changing to this

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(These are going to take a while.)

“Welcome to the EXTREME SUMMER GRAND PRIX OF LOVE AND FRIENDSHIP! Do not misunderstand us, ladies and gentlemen – there is NO LOVE OR FRIENDSHIP in these tracks! So expect a BLOODBATH! I’m your head announcer today, beloved by children and cats the same – the most charismatic and intelligent: Bastet! Joined by the ever smiling, Philonune – how are you doing today?”
“I’m doing great today, thank you.” Philonune is smirking as always.
“Today’s race is divided into 8 large sections, each filled with more deadly traps that our contestants need to somehow overcome! Either way! Let’s meet our competitors! Take it from here, Saraswati!”

Close to the starting line, Saraswati is floating around the 1st vehicle!

“Hello ladies and gentlemen, I welcome you to another edition of this derby demolition we try to mask as a racing event!” Saraswati poses for the camera! “The first team is here already, from mostly Johnny’s apartment, riding an Auto-Rickshaw, the team consists of Yu Yan Liamishi, Matilda Spice and their leader Nariko Edamura! They are The Hobos and their caretaker!

“…Who named us that?” Yu Yan is a little irked.
“I’m carrying this team anyway. So it’s pretty much correct.” Matilda as impasse as ever.
“I-I’m going to prove my worth… T-This time I’ll show you all I’m really competent.” Nariko hypes herself up.
“We’re doomed.” Yu Yan sentences.

The crowd was pretty much behind this team until they announced Nariko as their leader. Harsh.

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>>3505991

“Next, the second team! From the New Calamity’s Clinic, riding an ambulance, The team consisting of Dr. Imminenté Calamity, Nurse Katastrophic Calamity and their leader Constance Strangelove! They are the Calamity Clinic Collision!”

“S-So if we win, maybe I’ll be able to f-find my parents…?” Constance’s eyes are shining.
“We will bring them down for you, sweetheart.” Kata seems eager to make the little mummy’s wish a reality.
“HahHAHahHAHha! It won’t be easy! But we will give them our best shot.” Dr. Calamity seems to be in a great mood.

The crowd is cheering hard for Constance. How cute!

>>3506000
Yeah, go Constance!

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>>3506000

“Now, the third team! From the wealthy part of the city, riding the Golden Fox, The team consisting of Danforth Villiers, Dorothy Villiers and their leader Lise Villiers! They are the Villiers!”

“Dear, why is this brat going to get the spotlight instead of us? Does she really need another full episode to embarrass herself again? Almost getting crippled wasn’t shameful enough?” Dorothy talks to her husband.
“For the last time, treat our daughter with respect…” Danforth seems uncomfortable.
“Mom! You’re such a—”
“Bitch? I know. Your simple minded insults are endearing for a child, but just because your brain didn’t mature at the same pace as the rest of your body, doesn’t mean you’re still one. Such a disappointment…”
“…” Lise grinds her teeth.

The crowd didn’t make any noise with this announcement. Damn…

>>3506000
>The crowd is cheering hard for Constance. How cute!
Good for her, she deserves it

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>>3506010

“…Ehem, the f-fourth team! From the right side of history, riding a TANK!, The team consisting of the dictator, Lazarus Don Gordon Jr., cult leader, Bernando Ammirati and their leader Elicarto Lloydington! They are the Good Guys!

“What did you just say about me?” President Don Gordon Jr. is not one bit happy with Saraswati’s comments. “Take her away. Now.”

The security grabs and takes away the bear from her cloud, she was yelling something about you can’t silence the press or something… Now she’s being replaced by Dhrtarastra.

“S’up hommies, it’s me.” Dhrtarastra introduces himself. “So what’s up with this team? Aren’t you enemies? Why go for a team?” He asks Ammirati.
“I thought it would be funny.” Ammirati confesses.
“Why is he the cap?” Dhrtarastra points to Lloydington, who grabs the mic away from Dhrtarastra.

“Because I decisively won rock, papers, and scissors!” He exclaims proudly… Dhrtarastra actually pushes him away and takes his mic back.
“Don’t fucking touch my mic or I’ll fucking kill you.”

Security ran over Dhrtarastra, but he’s fighting back. The feed mysteriously cut…

Now we’re with Athelone instead! She will serve as Saraswati’s new permanent replacement.


Continuining when I have the rest done…

>>3505991
>The Hobos and their caretaker!
I regret not being in this team

Maybe next year...

>>3506016
Those dictators mean serious business.

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“Now, the fifth team! From someone’s basement, riding a golf cart, the team consisting of Sewel Scott, Robert Conti and their leader Craig Harris! They are Poker Night Aces!”

“…But we never won once.” Craig scratches the back of his head.
“This is another great opportunity to leave Ando out of the equation, he will pay for what he did to me! His smug smile will be wiped once and for all!” Mr. Conti still harbors rancor towards you.

“Didn’t Osgood fuck you up last game? Why are you taking it out on the kid?” Sewel is confused.
“Oh, did someone forget he also lost to Ando? Hmph, that’s why you never end up winning anything with that terrible memory of yours.”
“I-I’ll fucking you show, you cunt.” Sewel is ready to take on the race.

“G-Guys, I don’t really know if it’s a good idea if we win. I mean, I’m not one of the most interesting guys out there.” Craig doesn’t seem to want to win.
“Don’t be a little shit and at least try for once, okay?” Sewel seems mad at Craig's unwillingness to attempt victory.
“Fine.” Craig now looks pretty pissed.

The crowd booed them hard, mostly thanks to Mr. Conti.

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>>3506101

“I feel rather pointless just shouting this over and over again, but next – your sixth team! From different places, riding a Horse!, the team consisting of Joel Tomah, Ruffus ‘the man’ Hugg and their leader Stan Ando! They are Stan Ando and Others!”

“E-Excuse me, why am I teaming up with this filthy idiot? Why is our team named like that? I exclusively asked not to be paired with any Andos!” Joel stares at Stan with disgust. “And why is he the leader?”
“Because guess which of us actually pleased your wife?” Stan Ando fires back.
“Y-You…!”
“My, my. There is no need to fight, I know if we put our differences aside, this race will be ours for the taking.” Ruffus tries to put peace back.

“Blah, if Johnny is one of the favorites to win, shit must be easy.” Stan cracks his knuckles. “Just don’t get in my way.” Stan Ando jumps on the horse first.

The crowd had pretty mild hate towards Joel for some reason.

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>>3506102

“Now team seventh. It’s Henry.” Athelone didn’t even try to feign enthusiasm.

“…Why am I alone?” Henry wonders as he’s on a pogo stick.

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>>3506104

“Now ladies and gentlemen, please welcome your ninth team! From the Green Foothill High School, riding a Hovercraft!, the team consisting of Terrance Denton, Soh Futaki and their leader George Adams! They are Henry’s friends!”

“Okay, hold on. The fuck is this?” Henry is dumbfounded.

“Uuhh… We thought you already had a team.” Soh explains. “And Terry seemed lonely, so we invited him over.”
“Sorry, Henry. Maybe next time.” Terry looks genuinely apologetic.
“Yo Henry, if I ended up winning – I wouldn’t mind giving you the prize!” George says as a true bro.

“No. I’m fine. I’ll show you all I can do this shit! I’m tired of being overlooked and underestimated! To all of you!” He points at the crowd. “This is the last time I’ll be your laughing stock!”

“…Henry, I don’t want to rain on your parade, but… you’re on a pogo stick. Good luck with that!” George starts laughing.
“…” Henry bounces away in shame.

The crowd wasn’t engaged until Henry gave his speech, then he received some mildly applauses…


Continuing when I have the rest done…

>>3506106
Calling it now, Henry is gonna win.

>>3506102
>“Because guess which of us actually pleased your wife?” Stan Ando fires back.
Damn, shots fired

>>3506104
>Henry
>Pogo stick
Perfect

>>3506106
>“No. I’m fine. I’ll show you all I can do this shit! I’m tired of being overlooked and underestimated! To all of you!” He points at the crowd. “This is the last time I’ll be your laughing stock!”
I can't wait for him to job instantly

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“Everyone, the Ninth team! From a strangely formed friendship, riding a Giant Chewirton!, the team consisting of Yukika Ikeda, Nia ‘Sammi’ Sambou and their leader Scarlet Argyle! They are Scarlet is kind of decent Team!”

“Ha! They actually let us use that one, nice.” Sammi laughs to herself.
“That’s embawassing!” Scarlet shuts her mouth with her hands when she lets her lisp run wild.
“So cuuuute! Isn’t she?” Sammi points at redder than normal Scarlet.

“Scarlet, don’t let this distract you! If you win, you will totally have your chance to confess to Johnny and there is no way he’s going to say no! Right, Chewy?” Yukika seems pretty hyped.
“Woof.” Chewirton the always collected responds.

“Just imagine! Having him all for yourself! Cuddling and kissing for hours… And hours… with that nice hair of his and those eyes…” Yukika slowly starts losing her enthusiasm. Almost feels like she’s regretting something.
“A-Are you okay, Yuki?” Scarlet checks on her friend.
“Yeah, I’m f-fine…” Yukika stares at Johnny in the distance.

“Yo, you want my girl’s man, right?” Sammi puzzles it together.
“N-No! Not at all! W-We better start preparing!” Yukika jumps on the Giant Chewirton.
“…Whatever makes him happy the most.” Scarlet shrugs as she jumps as well.

The crowd was nuts for Chewirton. He’s a star after all.

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>>3506232

“Now presenting, the tenth team! From an even more strangely formed friendship as well, riding a shitty looking van…, The team consisting of Osgood Gaumont, your eternal Poker Night Champion Bradford Cahill and their leader Ruby Koroma! They are Ruby is better than Scalet, don’t at me.”

“I’m not going to argue with facts, but who named us like that…?” Osgood is bewildered.
“Haha! Victory shall be ours, my friend! But I wonder… Where is my belt?” Bradford wonders.

“I took it.” Mr. Conti appears in the frame.
“W-What?! My most prized possession! H-How could you…? I was buried with it!”
“Don’t be ridiculous, I took it way before that. You’re dead, you don’t need it. Poker Nights must go on!”

“Y-Yes, b-b-but how uncouth of you? I-It’s mine. I won it fair and square”
“You think someone saw me, you foolish oafish?” Conti smirks. “And you lost it fair and square by dying. Do you think you will mind after today? I don’t think so.”

“C-Can you go back to your fucking car or whatever? Just go away!” Osgood kicks Mr. Conti to a round of cheers. “Jeez, no wonder why Conti hates you.”
“But I’m me! I’m Conti!”
“GO AWAY! I meant your son, you dumb ass…”

“…And this is why I didn’t like you going to that place. The nerve of that man.” Ruby feels validated.
“Don’t be like that… Besides, I don’t think that’s going to be a problem from now on…” Osgood’s expression changes completely.
“What do you mean?” Ruby is confused.

Aside from kicking Mr. Conti away, they were received with a chorus of boos. Ouch.

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>>3506234

“Now team eleventh. From different prison cells, riding a broom!, The team consisting of Terrorist B, Terrorist C, and their leader Terrorist A! They are the Terror Inducing Trio!

“M-My name is Jaylene Larsen!” Terrorist B says.
“I’m Rhys Frie!” Terrorist C says.
“And I’m Oliver Watts!” Terrorist A yells.

“Silence, you unrefined tawdry. I never gave you the punishment you rats deserved for laying your dirty maggot fingers on my crystal princess. I should have eliminated you when I had the chance.” Athelone barks back. “But maybe the gods are smiling upon me, I may take this opportunity to do so now…”

“S-Stop! S-Security!” Oliver yells at the monster as both of his partners are hiding behind him in terror.

Security takes Athelone away.

“D-Don’t worry guys, we will win this race and I’ll find a way to bring you guys back.” Oliver Watts.

“AHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHA!” Athelone starts laughing uncontrollably after hearing Oliver’s remarks from afar. “THERE IS NO WAY TO BRING BACK THE DEAD! HAHAHAHA! FOOLISH IDIOTS!”

The trio remains in silence for a second until Jaylene says something.

“Doesn’t matter. We want you to have a better life from now on. If we win, there is a chance for you to turn things around.”
“Yeah, Oliver! It’s the least you deserve!” Rhys nods.
“Guys…” Oliver is about to cry. “W-We will win!”

The crowd couldn’t care less until Athelone said those mean things, but they actually cheered for her.

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>>3506237

Athelone is replaced by none other than Welimor! People are cheering for her for some reason!

“Woohoo! Thanks, everyone!” Welimor seems pretty cheerful. “Now, without further ado, here’s the 12th team! From some money laundering scheme! Riding a Formula 1 Car! Flint Masterson! Gonzales! And their leader…. MIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIKHAEEEEEEEEEL KAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIING!”

“Thank you, thank you! You’re so kind!” Ka-Shing seems pretty hyped up, the crowd seems to love him.
“Yeesh, how much you pay them for this?” Flint is confused.
“You think this kind of love can be bought? I’m the star of the show and they know it, baby!” Ka-Shing laughs.

“…Let’s be real. How much?” Flint now is asking Ka-Shing’s bodyguard Gonzales if this is true or not.
“They love him for creating Lieutenant of Headpats. Little do they know he was the one who wanted her nerfed…”
“What? What the fuck are you talking about?” Flint is confused. “Anyway, how are we going to fit in that shit?”

As said before, they were loved way too much for your comfort.


Continuing when I have the rest done…

>>3506232
What a cute bunch of cucks

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“Now the 13th team!” Welimor is hyping it up. “From reality, riding a weird looking van, The team consisting of Tobias “7W157” Phonte, Kazuchika Storgaard – and their team leader Howie Dewitt! They are Team this is how we do it!

“I told you all I would have my revenge. I didn’t think it would have been this early. But after today, Howie will carry on my torch – bring me back and we will make sure none of you scum gets to see another day.” Kazuchika Storgaard addresses the other participants with his normal harsh tone.
“…Yeah, and your local team sport sucks!” 7W157 makes it lame.
“Hehehe… Did you hear that, Johnny? Trent? Ugly dyke? You wanted to deter me, but that has only made me stronger! Now, when I get my chance, you all will rot in hell! Because I will save the world! I! I!” Howie starts laughing maniacally.

“You mean us, right…?” 7W157 seemed a little uncomfortable.
“Of course, together we will change society!” Howie somehow still believes in friendship.

The crowd ignored them.

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>>3506362

“Please welcome this team, because they are the bomb!” Welimor points to the next group! “With their explosive nature, they erupt to the scene from the Pitfall Arcade, they bang their way through as they are about to blow up! They are riding a DUCK!, Wilvy! Gunther! And their leader Jamie Lang! They are the EXPLOSIVE MENACE!

“Hehe, it’s funny because we exploded.” Gunther laughs to himself. Jamie slaps the back of his head.
“Man, it really feels weird – it’s like our first lines of dialogue.” Wilvy touches his throat.
“Shut up, and look at me!” Wilvy and Gunther turn to Jamie. “I have no idea what happened while we are dead, but we will fuck this bitch up – our name depends on it!”

“You mean blow this bitch up? Eh? Eh?” Gunther jokes.
“Hehehe, good one.” Wilvy laughs.
“Thanks!”
“Pay attention or we are going to lose!” Jamie slaps both on the head.

“Hey, it says there that’s Johnny… He doesn’t look like him.” Gunther notices.
“Yeah, there must be a mistake.” Jamie is confused.
“What are you guys on about? That’s Johnny. He got ripped though, good for him.” Wilvy nods.

“…Don’t give credit to the competition!” Jamie slaps Wilvy’s heads. “You think if any of the assholes win we will have a chance of appearing again? The answer is no! I know that fucker Henry has something to do with this too! It’s not possible everyone decided to forget about us.”
“I don’t think they like him all that much since he’s riding alone.” Gunther points out.
“…Who’s Henry?” Wilvy is confused.

The crowd also ignored them.

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>>3506365

“Now the 15th team!” Welimor seems to enjoy her job. “From the netherworld, riding Wheelie Bike! Their squad consists of Vivienne Neuville , Foroutan – and their team leader Valdemar Bruun ! They are The Cult Bros.!

“…Who picked that name?” Valdemar looks irritated, for his standards at least.
Vivienne raises her hand in shame.
“D’awwww, told ya, girl – you have a cute side.” The bald man Foroutan laughs.
“S-Shut up.”

“So why do you think the boss is riding with those guys?” Foroutan wonders.
“Because we are awful…” Vivienne painfully admits.
“…” Valdemar and Foroutan stare at the ground, speechless. They know it's true.

There were 10 to 15 people in the crowd who were cheering loudly for Vivienne for unknown reasons. But aside from that, nothing.

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>>3506366

“Now the 16th team!” Welimor dances with the microphone. “From the police department, riding a police car! Their unit consists of Roger Jackson, Lenny Yabe – and their team leader Rob Banks! They are The Police Department and friends!

“So could you give Lenny his job back?” Roger asks Rob on behalf of Yabe.
“Even if I said yes, we won’t remember any of this shit, right? I’m sure I’ll encounter this lil’ bitch if I get my own thing.” Rob Banks smirks.
“T-Thanks!” Lenny looks like a loser.

“We cops look for each other. Now… I have no idea who most of these cocksuckers are, but we are going to win – understand?”
“Yes!” Lenny seems to be very obedient.
“I wonder if the kid is going to have something against me for this…” Roger feels bad for competing against Johnny.
“Probably! But who gives a shit?! He won’t remember! We can’t lose to Masterson, you hear me, gang?!”

The crowd booed Rob Banks pretty harshly, some people even turned their back to him.

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>>3506371

“It’s time for the 17th team!” Welimor doesn’t know what to do to keep things fresh. “From Pokyo Lokyo! Riding a shit car! Their teams is Kenneth Dudley, Sasha Langdon and their captain Sven ‘B-WORM’ Dolberg! They are the We actually were part of the Assembly but now know it was a bad idea! That’s a mouthful one!

“I wonder if WILDFLAME is looking for a sidekick.” Sasha wonders.
“…What?” Dudley is out of words.
“Don’t what me? The guy is kinda cool!”
“But why turn into his sidekick? That’s like going 8 steps ahead. Besides being a superhero is stupid. Real men fight each other face to face, no weird shit in the middle.”
“Bitch, I would look great in spandex!” Sasha nods to herself.
“Nobody said anything about that…” Dudley is weirded out.

B-WORM silently wondered why he ended up in this team. At least he has a chance of having his own thread where he won’t meet with any of these two…

But they don’t need to know that.

The crowd cheered for B-WORM as he seems to be a little famous.

For a Carnival Phantasm-esque Grand Prix I am surprised I haven't seen a drag machine yet.

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>>3506373

“How many of these teams are?! It’s the 18th team or whatever!” Welimor is not enjoying it anymore. “From Heaven! Riding something! They are Brock Mckenzie, Barry the Hobo and their captain Linda Wise! They are the Creator’s followers! How boring!

“How disrespectful, young lady! Give me ten laps!” Mckenzie scolds Welimor.
“Shut up, old cripple.” Welimor responds.
“Hohoho, don’t need to be mean to what’s left of this …man.” Linda looks with disgust at Mckenzie.

“Nobody is talking to you, old hag!” Welimor shows her tongue.
“W-What?! Me OLD?!” Linda is furious.
“Calm down you two. Don’t let your ire get the better of you. We need to give our soul and body to our Lord.” Barry grabs both Mckenzie and Linda away from Welimor like they are nothing.

“It’s rather sad not even in the afterlife you regained your memories, uh?” Linda comments about Barry.
“…” Barry remains silent, he’s staring at Nariko.

The crowd didn’t care for this team either.

Continuing when I have the rest done…

(Sorry, this is the last reply of the day. I got too sleepy. I’ll finish the introductions tomorrow and start the race!)

>>3506362
>But after today, Howie will carry on my torch
Kaz is so fucking pathetic. He's relying on Howie. FUCKING HOWIE

>>3506365
>They're literally the 3 stooges
I don't know what else I expected

>“What are you guys on about? That’s Johnny. He got ripped though, good for him.” Wilvy nods.
>“…Who’s Henry?” Wilvy is confused.
Man Wilvy is a total bro, why did he have to die?

>>3506366
>“…Who picked that name?” Valdemar looks irritated, for his standards at least.
>Vivienne raises her hand in shame.
>“D’awwww, told ya, girl – you have a cute side.” The bald man Foroutan laughs.
>“S-Shut up.”
Waifu status: Confirmed

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“I’ve been told I needed to be more respectful with the teams that are left. So, now presenting the 19th team! The one-man wrecking crew! From STARDOM! Riding the Blue Falcon! Weighing 295 pounds! YOUR NEW TRUE HERO: WIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIILDFLAME!”

“OH YEAH! I’m unjustifiably in a position I’d rather not be in. The odds are stacked against me today, but that ain’t gonna matter! These groups of three won’t compare to THE ONE-MAN WRECKING CREW! Make no mistake ladies and gentleman, WILDFLAME came to town to claim the biggest prize home! I have my eyes on the championship belt!” WILDFLAME furiously poses! Then he starts pointing at the camera with raw intensity. “To my opponents tonight, you don’t have anything to worry about, this is going to end so fast you’re not going to be able to talk about it. The finish line and the way to STARDOM are one and the same, meaning when I light the way to victory – all of you will only see my muscular back as I get the homecoming I EARNED!”

He sounds pretty confident there! The crowd is firmly behind WILDFLAME!

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>>3507774

“Now presenting a peculiar alliance as the 20th team!” Welimor points to the next team. “They come from mutual interests and are riding a Crazy Taxi! The squad consisting of ‘The Secret Ace’ Gerard Luther, Joe Riddle and their leader Charlie Ironheart! Good luck, Charlie!”

“Thanks, darling.” Charlie is in good humor.
“…We haven’t officially teamed up, right? This must be pretty confusing to some people.” Joe scratches the back of his head.
“Blah! People love spoilers nowadays!” Gerard scoffs at Joe. “Right, Bruthete?!” He yells to one section of the crowd, where his partner is eating popcorn.

“I hope you lose.” He responds. Ouch.
“Let’s try to give a good showing, men in our position can’t afford to look ridiculous.” Charlie doesn’t seem too confident in their chances.
“…But losing early is more relaxing, right? We can enjoy the nice breeze instead.” Joe doesn’t want to participate at all, how lazy.

The crowd was fairly enthusiastic about this team.

CUHRAYZEEEEE TAXI

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>>3507777

“Another ‘out there’ battalion here!” Welimor seems fairly excited. “From Depressionville! They are riding a terrible looking motor scooter! The team consisting of Carmella Camerota, Sparkles of Luck headmaster T_T Neko! And their leader Nina Uccelli! They are the Team We are stuck Together…!

“That name bothers me…” Nina is not exactly happy with the name.
“That bothers you? What is really troublesome is that I should have been the leader! I wrote it in the team inscription! That’s the only reason I accepted being in this crap team.” Carmella is not one bit happy.
“Y-You are kind of a prick, so I changed it…” T_T Neko confesses.
“Hmph! Whatever! I’m not even going to try then!” Carmella is acting entitled. “I get why you two are friends. You love doing things behind people’s back! Too afraid to talk things over, uh? That’s basically admitting you made a mistake. Rash decision after rash decision is Nina’s motto anyway – so I should have seen it coming. She usually brings the worst qualities out of people.” Feels as though she’s self-projecting.

“Now I understand what kind of a prick you are…” T_T Neko looks furious.
“Are you going to keep that to yourself or are you going to say it to my face, uh?!” Carmella shouts back.

“Enough, you two! Neko, I know you mean well, but now’s not the time.” Nina interrupts this little scuffle. “And Carmella, I thought you still have some dignity in you to try to make amends with me after everything you’ve done. At minimum behave and cooperate. It’s not too late now.”
“You’re still a selfish hypocrite.” Carmella goes to ride Nina’s awful scooter.

“I apologize for everything, Neko. There are no excuses, it’s all my fault.” Nina feels bad about it.
“Don’t apologize! I k-know you turned down t-the other girls’ team to make sure I participated in the race. So I don’t care…” T_T Neko is really eager to participate. “I-I don’t know what’s that freaking prick’s problem. Y-You’re not selfish, quite the opposite.”

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>>3507796

“Oh please!” Carmella couldn’t stay quiet for much longer. Her indignation reached a new level. “How long have you known this woman? A month? A week? A day? I know her for most of my life and let me tell you how wrong you are! You know how artificial her help is? She just wants the moral ground over her peers. You heard her now, right? It didn’t take her 5 minutes to confront me about the only favor she has ever done to me. Not much of a favor, now is it? And by the way, the least you could do is to forget about that stupid debt.”

“I just wanted you to behave and cooperate for the race.” Nina responds.
“Behave? Like you’re the perfect example of that! Or did you forget about your drunken slips? My carpet sure does remember! What about those late night calls crying about how sad and lonely you were? How many times did I tell you just to go outside and stop being so fucking sad all the time?!”
“I-I was trying, it wasn’t easy… And I bought you a new expensive carpet, the exact one you liked even if yours wasn’t a fraction of the price…”

“See! Typical Nina, have to remind everyone she didn’t fuck up as badly! Newsflash, you did anyway! Do you even remember all the food you ate from me? You didn’t even give me a cent back!”
“Y-You wanted me to taste your recipes… I made you food as well, we made lunch for each other all the time. I gave you back as much as I could, we were friends…”
“But your food was shit! You still don’t get it, do you?! You’re just shit and the only thing you love doing is taking advantage of people. I bet your stupid new boyfriend is going to kick your fat ass out when he realizes the only good you are at is taking, and taking and TAKING! Just like you pretended to be nice to this girl and manipulate her to take my spot for your selfish reasons.”

“…” Nina stares at the ground, her face only expressing depression. She’s not taking it well.
“I’m pretty sure you’re being disingenuous…” Neko is not an idiot and doesn’t take Carmella’s comments to face value.

The crowd largely booed them thanks to T_T Neko.

(Probably going to be the only update today! Sorry!)

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“The 22th team is a group of unorthodox vicious individuals!” Welimor is hyping them up. “They come from Pokyo Lokyo and are riding a mad vehicle! The group consisting of Trent Figg! Blake Wilkinson and their leader Ajna Ravlic! This team is known as Misery comes on BEAT!”

“YES! YES! IT’S PARTY TIME! LET’S CRUSH THESE FUCKERS!” Trent is pretty hyped up. “If we are the last ones standing, we win this shit, right?!”
“Y-Yes, that is true…” Welimor shyly responds to Trent’s inquiry.

“I’M ALIVE AGAIN! HAHAHAHA!” Blake is going absolutely insane.
“Try to look both ways this time, retard. Shit’s a race.” Trent makes fun of his tag team partner.
“Shut up, you fucko! I didn’t come back to be yelled at by 2nd place!” Blake’s still in a good mood despite the annoyance.

“You dumb as shit mouth breather, WE ARE A TEAM!”
“OOOOOOOOOOOOoooooh! LIKE I GIVE A DAMN! Wait a fuck…” Blake remembers something. “That fucking four-eyed wimp! He’s here, right?! Where are you, FOUR-EYES!? I’M NOT FINISHED WITH YOU!”
“Just wait for the damn shit to start! He’s going down as well!” Trent laughs.

Ajna is in the backseat, trembling in fear – hoping to never be noticed by her teammates. Why is she there…?

The crowd is actively booing them with vitriol.

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>>3509951

“Now presenting the 23rd team, Fr—!”

“Johnny! I think it’s finally time you tell me who our partner is!” Amelia demanded without noticing she's yelling over Welimor, who decides to stop talking altogether. Your little sister is fuming as she feels patronized! “And where is our car…?! A-Are we really going to be in the race without a car?”
“I told you it’s a surprise, Ames. Besides, aren’t you happy we are a team? I bet you didn’t think I was going to pick you.” You respond without putting too much emotion in your voice.
“Y-Yeah, I thought you were going to leave me alone…again. I’m sorry for doubting you.” Amelia admits her fault, despite her nervousness getting the best of her. “B-But there is a limit to how much I can wait!”

Out of nowhere, a dusking dismal vehicle parks in front of you and Amelia. It is as saddening to look at as that mournful day. The hearse looks to have deteriorated as if it went to the grave as well. As the smoke of its sudden stop starts dispelling, you start feeling nervous about what’s to come.

“Johnny… W-What’s going on?” Amelia is bewildered, her eyes can’t believe what’s happening. She starts slowly walking towards the vehicle.

The driver’s door slowly opens and from it a woman with glasses in her late 30s emerges, looking as unremarkable as ever. You feel incredibly stupid to even feel a little bit nervous to see your Mom again. She waves at the two you, smiling from ear to ear.

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>>3509960

“Mom…? Mom! Mom!” Amelia starts running to your mother, tears falling off her face – turning back to the small cute blob you’ve always remembered your sister to be, all her angst and pain gone as your mother embraces her in her arms.
“There, there… You don’t know how much I missed you and your brother.” Mom is happy to hug her child once again. “Amelia, my sweet Amelia.”

Amelia can’t articulate a response as she continues crying. She’s just plain happy.

“Johnny, dear – don’t just stand there. Come here, say hello to your mother.” Your mom wants to hug you as well.
“I-It’s fine, I think Amelia needs it more than I do…”
“No hug is complete without you. We’re a family, silly!”
“Agagaaghu…” Amelia tries to say… something, but it comes as complete gibberish – she wants you to be part of the hug as well.

…You stop trying to be the cool guy and move to hug your family. It’s like she never left. All the problems you have, all the weight on your shoulders – it’s all gone. You feel an immense amount of happiness despite the tears raining down your face. After all these years you feel at home again!

You wonder why can’t this be real.

From the corner of your eye, you are able to see that bastard Joel trying to get closer to the family, but your dad is choking him from behind and starts dragging him away from you all. Guess even your dad has a good side, uh?

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>>3509963

Eventually, your mom puts an end to this miraculous hug. “Look at you two, you both grew so much! You both look so cute and handsome now! Maybe I was holding you two back…” Mom jokes. “But enough sentimentality! We have a race to win, family!”
“B-But who cares about this stupid race, mom!” Amelia complains, she wants happy family time. You agree.
“Amelia, when we win we will get even more time to spend with each other!”

“You seem pretty confident, mom.” You smirk.
“Johnny, do you remember what I always say?”
“To do your best, because even if you don’t accomplish anything – your family and friends will appreciate it…?” Amelia says it instead of you.

“Yes, that’s one of the things I said. But what’s the other one…?” Now Mom is staring at you, expecting a response.
“Those who hurt my family will pay me back with their blood…” You recite from memory. Honestly, she used it once when she heard Amelia was getting bullied at school. It was so metal you didn’t forget, but still…
“W-When did you say such a t-thing?” Amelia is appalled.
“Don’t worry about the details, sweetie.” Mom puts her hand on Amelia’s shoulder. “What’s important is that I’m not going to let his family be torn apart again. Now, let’s do our best!”

The crowd ignored you all for the most part. You don’t care.

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>>3509965

“Now presenting the last team in the competition!” Welimor air guitars for a second before signaling to the final team. “They come from Pokyo Lokyo as well, they are riding a Motorbike! The team consisting of Jeff ‘Double J’ Jefferson, Mickey Wright and their leader Richard Wright! They are the Do Better Team!”

“Unlike some attention seeking family, we left our reunion private.” Richard is already throwing shade at you. His brother Mickey is back as well, he’s a small nerdy looking kid.
“You couldn’t stop crying though, big badass.” Double J comments.
“K-Keep that information private, please.” Richard seems fairly embarrassed.

“I didn’t think you missed me this much. You were always so busy I thought…” Mickey is conflicted but glad his brother cares about him so much.
“You thought wrong, Mickey. Even if we won’t remember any of these events in the future, I’m glad to we’re together again.”
“Mhm!” Mickey looks fairly energetic. “T-There are a lot of people in here. Uh?! I know some of them! Like that fat dude over there – we used to play cards together!” Mickey points at Bradford. “A-And that lanky dude over there, we played fighting games at the arcade!” He points at Wilvy now. “And that guy used to cosplay at the arcade!” He points now at B-WORM. “Agh, w-what is Twister doing here…?” He seems to loathe 7w157. “And… Uh…”

“What’s wrong?” Double J notices something wrong with Mickey.
“Bro! That’s Miss Sussy! Remember the nice lady I talked with you about? She’s the one who taught me how to play Sparkles of Luck and gave me a bunch of cards! She’s here! I can’t believe it!” Mickey pulls Richard’s vest and points at T_T Neko.

“Nice lady…?” Richard notices his brother is pointing at the disgusting NEET. “Heh. You must be mistaken, that scum is anything but pleasant.” Richard scoffs at his brother.
“I-If you say so… But I’m pretty sure she’s the one…” Mickey is conflicted.

A good portion of the crowd cheered for them for some reason.

“…That’s everyone! Back to you guys!” Welimor ends this part of the broadcast.


We’re back with our announce table! Bastet and Philonune are ready to engage with the crowd at home.

“Well, well, well! We’re finally done with the introductions! People couldn’t shut up for some reason, but it adds to the drama – so it’s fine I guess!” Bastet is worried about how much of the running time has been wasted. “Any comments about what you have seen so far, Philonune?”
“Bold strategy not to use a wheelchair for everyone involved.”
“I’m sure we will see a stretcher or two during the r—” Bastet stops talking for a second. “BREAKING NEWS! The station has informed me there are NEW CHALLENGERS APPROACHING! We go back with Welimor for more information!”

The crowd groans in response.

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>>3509970

“Yes, Bastet! I can not believe this! The introductions took so long, a bunch of individuals decided to crash the race and join!” Welimor is fairly surprised. “Introducing the 25th team! From the Distant Frontier! Riding a… Lion thing. The team consisting of our ex-president Lazarus Don Gordon Sr., the enigmatic Esperanza and their leader Giorsal Kane! They are the Team We can Actually Play Now! ” Welimor didn’t commit Saraswati’s mistake with this Gordon…

“Hello everyone! As the leader of the Judges, I maintain an impartial role for all you players! But as a competitor…” Giorsal’s smile does a 180° after finishing her line. “…I seek no validation from the likes of you today. This is vendetta for berating us for our efforts to try to maintain a rule set amidst the madness this war broke upon us! You think it’s easy?! You think we don’t notice the errors we make?! You think complaining all the time helps?! You shall see even a person like me has her limits.” Giorsal is ready to fight.

“…” Esperanza is staring at everyone around her in silence. “So these are the people we’re helping… Awful.”
“Hehh… Heh… Hhh… Predator... prey... hhh... I hunt them all...” The machiavellian voice of the Ex-President gives chills to everyone in the crowd. “It… will be over… quick.”

The people are scared of the ex-President, aside from that – the crowd didn’t care about them all that much.

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>>3509975

“…But that’s not the only surprise! Introducing the 2nd special entry!” Welimor surprises everyone with this announcement. “From a shit town named Laoling! This gang of losers are The Gossipy Slut Margaret Duchemin! The fatfuck big coward Masen Reid! And their sad excuse of a leader, the friendless parentless Alfred Brown! These parasites are Team SPR! Who knows what that means! Go back to your own quest!” Welimor, for good reason, is being ruthless.

“Holy shit, what the fuck is like their problem!? Why do they hate us so much, Allie?!” Maggie is really angry at the relentless crowd and management.
“We’re outsiders, Maggie. Of course, they hate us.” Alfred doesn’t seem to care.
“G-Guys, thank you for letting me redeem myself for abandoning you! I won’t let you down again!” Reid wants to prove his worth.

“You don’t owe us anything.” Alfred doesn’t seem to care one way or another.
“H-Hey Allie, where is our rental car? You know, the one Catastrovania Strifaust Morituros IX gave us…?” Maggie seems nervous.
“We’re not using that crap.”
“Uh?! Then how are we s-supposed to participate?”

“With this.” Alfred claps and the ground below them split apart, from this new hole a nice looking car appears. “I present to you the Transam 20000.”
“Where did you get that?!” Reid is dumbfounded as he exclaims in awe. Maggie is incredibly excited as she gets inside the car!
“…You may find out in our next thread after we win this competition.” The impasse Alfred breaks the fourth wall while looking at the camera.

The crowd was nasty with them, almost as bad as they were booing Rob Banks and Mr. Conti.

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>>3509978

“And the true final participant of the race. He’s from the depths of hell. He’s the serial killer known as the Behemoth!” Welimor keeps it short then she moves away.

The man with the mask appears carrying some sort of Big Pillar! What does he intend to do with it?!

“…” His intense glance says it all. Not really, but who is going to try to ask him anything otherwise?!

The crowd remained completely silent.

Continuing when I have the rest done…

>>3509963
God damnit, I finally got off a retarded ban so I can say it now.
>Guess even your dad has a good side, uh?
ITS HUH! NOT UH, UH IS NOT A PROPER SET ENDING FOR A QUESTION!

>>3509963
>“Johnny, dear – don’t just stand there. Come here, say hello to your mother.” Your mom wants to hug you as well.
>“I-It’s fine, I think Amelia needs it more than I do…”
>“No hug is complete without you. We’re a family, silly!”
>“Agagaaghu…” Amelia tries to say… something, but it comes as complete gibberish – she wants you to be part of the hug as well.
What a cute family

>>3509970
>“Bro! That’s Miss Sussy! Remember the nice lady I talked with you about? She’s the one who taught me how to play Sparkles of Luck and gave me a bunch of cards! She’s here! I can’t believe it!” Mickey pulls Richard’s vest and points at T_T Neko.
Damn. How ironic

>>3509975
>“…I seek no validation from the likes of you today. This is vendetta for berating us for our efforts to try to maintain a rule set amidst the madness this war broke upon us! You think it’s easy?! You think we don’t notice the errors we make?! You think complaining all the time helps?! You shall see even a person like me has her limits.” Giorsal is ready to fight.
They deserve all the shit that they get

>>3509978
>“From a shit town named Laoling! This gang of losers are The Gossipy Slut Margaret Duchemin! The fatfuck big coward Masen Reid! And their sad excuse of a leader, the friendless parentless Alfred Brown! These parasites are Team SPR! Who knows what that means! Go back to your own quest!”
Couldn't have said it better myself

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“With the 27 teams ready for the competition! We’re truly ready now to start this fucking thing. FINALLY!” Even Bastet is tired of this shit at this point. “Any predictions?”
“Clearly my partner has this on the bag.” Philonune believes in you.
“How bold! I’m betting on the Good Guys.”
“…What about your own partner?”

“Pffft… Yeah, sure. She can’t make microwave popcorn right but she’s totally winning this crap. Get a grip!” Bastet doesn’t sound very supporting for a fellow reject.
“We shall see. If there is something I learned in my days in this universe, is that everyone has a chance to make a surprise.”
“Anyway! These are the betting odds!”

<- The odds are shown on the screen!

“Finally, we’re getting those engine ready, the race is going to start!” Bastet is getting excited.

The 27 competitors seem ready to finally start this thing once and for all. You’re not nervous since there is practically nothing to lose!

it’s time to begin the race once and for all!

What do you plan to do?!

>Try to get an early lead! You need to win, remember?!
>Be in the middle of the pack, don’t show all your cards just yet!
>Try to crash someone out of the race. (Specify who)
>Write In.

>>3510101
>Try to crash someone out of the race. (Specify who)
>Howie's team
Just lowering Howie's chances of getting a sidequest.

>>3510101
>>Be in the middle of the pack, don’t show all your cards just yet!
Let everyone else kill each other. For now we'll just have a nice family ride

>>3510101
>>Be in the middle of the pack, don’t show all your cards just yet!

>>3510112
>>3510143

Being in the middle of the pack won! Please roll 1d100! Best of 4!

Rolled 78 (1d100)

>>3510146

Rolled 21 (1d100)

>>3510146

Rolled 24 (1d100)

>>3510146

Rolled 23 (1d100)

>>3510146
LETS GO

>>3510147
Well this is nice.

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In front of everyone, Giorsal’s bee-like entity, Ethempress, appears with the checkered flag in her hands. She takes a good look at everyone competing and says the following:

“It seems everyone forgot the most important part of this race! The swimsuits! I’ll have to rectify that this instant!” She starts flying over every car and drops some magical dust on everyone, making their clothes shine and transform into swimsuits! Both Amelia and your Mom are now wearing bikinis, you have some shorts. If only you picked other people in your team, this could have been something less embarrassing.

“Uuuuhh…” Amelia feels fairly uncomfortable with the change. You miss your shoes, how are you supposed to drive like this?
“Oh my, I wasn’t expecting this kind of thing… It’s quite comfortable.” Your mom is fairly embarrassed, she’s sitting next to you, in the co-pilot sit. She then turns to Amelia who is on the back of the hearse. “Oh…”
“W-What do you mean ‘oh’…?” Amelia is concerned.
“This could be troublesome. You didn’t grow there as much as I was expecting.”
“MOM! DON’T SAY THAT!” Amelia is furious as she hides deeper in the back of the car.

“I’m concerned, dear! Have you been eating properly? You’re 16! This lack of growth cannot be normal!”
“Ha, I missed someone else teasing Amelia.” You smile.
“Johnny, what’s up with the scars on your chest?” Mom is checking on you now.
“T-The race is about to start, let’s p-pay attention to that instead…”

“Sure, let’s start slow so we can have a nice family ride, okay?”
“Yes, mom. I wouldn’t have any other way.” You are ready to ride!

After Ethempress counts to three, she waves the flag and officially starts the race! You’re surprised even the shittiest looking cars are deceptively fast! This could prove troublesome. You try to stay out of trouble and take the longest turn for maximum safety.

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>>3510355

“So tell me, Philonune – in this first section of the race, what should be expecting?” Bastet asks his color commentator.
“Like we said before, this track is divided into 8 stages, and the first one is the calm beach! Getting off track will make you drive on the tricky sand, and getting stuck is the last thing you want to do in a race like this. And at the very end of it, the course starts getting narrower. So that’s when the brutality starts!”
“I see, so plain sailing until the end of it. How awful for them, but great for us! Nobody is trying to be cheeky just yet. The Good Guys are battling first place with The Hobos and their caretaker! That’s a surprise.”

“Not if you knew about the competitors very well, that Matilda Spice is quite extraordinaire if I say so myself!” Philonune does his best fake radio voice. “Hey, can I talk normally? I feel quite ridiculous now…”
“Yeah, fuck it. We don’t have to be professional about this shit.” Bastet throws his notes away.

You on the other hand successfully placed yourself in the middle of the pack rank-wise, but you are far away from the groups just to stay safe.


The competition is just starting!

It’s time to aid or to sabotage! Pick 2 teams! 1 you want to help and 1 you want to sabotage! Then Roll 1d100!

The biggest amount of all the answers aids his first option!

The lowest amount of all the answers sabotages his second option!

This could change the ranks dramatically!

>>3510356
Aid the hobos
Sabotage the good guys

>>3510361
don't forget to roll!

Rolled 93 (1d100)

>>3510356
>Aid: The Calamity Clinic Collision
>Sabotage: The Good Guys

Rolled 17 (1d100)

>>3510362
oh right
>>3510361
rolling to encourage hobos/call the good guys gay

Rolled 80 (1d100)

>>3510356
>Aid Hobos
They'll need it

>Fuck over Henry
Not having a Henry chapter

Rolled 94 (1d100)

>>3510356
Help
>The Hobos and their caretaker

Sabatoge
>Team this is how we do it

Rolled 16 (1d100)

>>3510369
>>3510372
Nice
>>3510356

>>3510376
You need to pick who to help and who to destroy too! Since you're the lowest roll (16 so far), you pick who gets fucked.

>>3510379
Neat.
>>3510356
Sabotage The Good Guys
Aid Hobos

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Inside the Auto-Rickshaw. Nariko is the one driving, Yu Yan is hanging out next to Nariko, almost out of the vehicle – Matilda is in the backseat. Nariko is way too focused on the road to notice what her partners are doing.

“C’mon, Matilda, you need to help me!” Yu Yan yells at Matilda. “The only way to make Nariko perform even better is if you help me out!”
“…I refuse. I would prefer being one driving instead.”
“We’re neck and neck with the Good Guys! C’mon! What’s the problem?”
“I-It’s disgusting frankly. You’re just feeding her and patting her head! Is she some kind of dog?”

“Just look at her, she’s more like a cow… Point is, just tell her she’s a good girl, she works well with extremes! If she’s a good girl, you compliment her. If she fucks up, you can punish her as much as you like! She’s into that kind of stuff...”
“What stuff…?”
“Doesn’t matter. Here 5 bucks! Now help!”
“Affirmative.” Matilda starts patting Nariko’s head. “Good girl… Good girl…”

“Yes! YES! I’m finally being useful! I’m trying just like you said, Johnny! I’M DOING MY BEST!”

Somehow, the hobo’s car manages to get some nitro boost bullshit and moves even faster just by making Matilda say nice things about Nariko… They are way ahead in first place.


Meanwhile, inside the tank...

“So what does this button do?” Ammirati curiously looks at the red button inside the tank.
“I have no idea…” Lloydington is too busy driving. “Do not push the button.”

“You can’t say something like that and expect me not to push the button~.”
“Silence. I don’t want to listen to your drivel any longer! Leave the button alone!” Lloydington shouts at his teammate.
“Don’t be like that. I just want to see what happens if I press it, can't be the end of the world. Sadly...” Ammirati couldn’t care less as he’s trying to stir shit up.
“I would advise you two to keep looking ahead, because as of now – we’re ramming our tank into a damn rock.” Gordon Jr. can’t hold it anymore and yells at both of them.

They are dead last now…

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>>3510470

You are still in the middle of the pack, the path ahead is starting to get narrower and in its edges – a bunch of dangerous looking rocks are going to be a problem.

What do you do?

>Try to get ahead now! If you’re up there, nobody will be able to collide with you!
>Try to take things slower, let the main bulk of vehicles ahead. Secure a safe path instead of trying to get ahead and get into trouble.
>Keep your pace, you will stay in the middle of the bulk, but you will be prepared if anyone tries to do something funny.
>Write In.

>>3510472
>Try to get ahead now! If you’re up there, nobody will be able to collide with you!
Try to catch up to your headpat powered hobo.

>>3510481
>>3510472
Do this and head pat our hobo and introduce them to our mom

Rolled 96 (1d100)

>>3510481
wait shit, forgot my roll again

>>3510472
>>Try to get ahead now! If you’re up there, nobody will be able to collide with you!

>>3510484
>and introduce them to our mom
"Hey Mom, these are my hobos. I raised them with care"

>>3510481
>>3510495
>>3510500
Please roll now! In the next prompt I'll need you to roll immediately!

Rolled 12 (1d100)

>>3510509

Rolled 67 (1d100)

>>3510509

Rolled 17 (1d100)

>>3510509

>>3510509
(still a best of 4)

Rolled 99 (1d100)

>>3510509

>>3510523
the souls of the dead power this cow

>>3510526
car*
my mind is still on mooriko

>>3510526
>>3510528
I'd say both apply in this situation

>>3510523
Deja vu I've been in this place before

>>3510557
Higher on the street and I know it's my time to go

>>3510472
>The Winners’ team captain will have a thread of his/her own! (Same as Flint in Do Your Best Quest: Grilled Justice!)

Erm, quick question. If Team SPR were to win does that mean there will be a crossoverish story or that the next chapter in their quest will begin sooner?

>>3510586
Next chapter will begin sooner.

>>3510586
I think we'll just get SPR instead of DYB next week

>>3510587
>>3510588
Fuck me I guess

>>3510590
kek, thanks anyway.

>>3510587
>Next chapter will begin sooner.
Aye aye cap'n. That's a good enough reward for me, even if we have to sacrifice a character chapter!

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“I think we need to go faster or else we will be trapped.” You tell your Mom and Amelia.
“Aww, we were having such a good time…” Amelia is disappointed. You were chatting about all the stuff you did while mom was gone.
“Amelia, do you know how we can make this situation even better?” Mom stares at Amelia with her signature tender smile. “By winning! Go ahead, Johnny!”
“Sure thing.” You put the foot down and accelerate as much as you can.

You went so fast, so quickly, you accidentally bumped with Henry’s friends and The Creators Followers, making them lose a lot of their lead. Whoops. After that, you managed to evade the other cars and get behind The Hobos and their caretaker! As the path starts getting narrower, you put your vehicle next to theirs. You pull down your window and say hi.

“D-dear J-Johnny?!” Mooriko is surprised and embarrassed to be wearing whatever that swimsuit is suppose to be.
“Woah, casually flexing your muscles in there I see, stud.” Yu Yan comments. She doesn’t look the slightest bit embarrassed, Matilda on other hand is just a bit embarrassed – but not even close to the same level of Nariko’s.

“We still haven’t arrived to that point of the story yet, but Mom I want to introduce you to my hobos.” You point to the girls in the other car.
“Yeah, mom! They are all super cool! I love them!” Amelia is happy to have friends.
“Oh my! Nice to meet you sweeties!” Mom waves at them. “…But why do you call them hobos?”

“Ho-holy shit! W-Why didn’t you tell me your mom was in there!” Yu Yan is extremely embarrassed and hides in the backseat. “I s-swear, I’m not that type of girl! I-It’s just…!”
“Don’t worry about it, sweetheart! Complimenting each other is always a good sign of a healthy relationship! C’mon Johnny, say something back to your nice little hobo lady.”
“Yu Yan, you are still the cutest and that bikini looks great on you!” You happily shout from your seat.

“T-Thanks! J-Just don’t say anything else!” Yu Yan is still hidden though.
“Uh… I rarely see her get embarrassed.” Amelia looks surprised.

“See? I raised them with care.” You nod to yourself.
“I can tell! They look so healthy and happy to see you! This one especially! What a physique!” She points to Matilda.
“I’m not a hobo.” Matilda dryly replies. “But thank you, there are few people who appreciate it.” Matilda is one proud lady.

“Oh my mistake. You were so radiantly beaming with such happiness when you saw my son, I thought you were part of their group.”
“E-Excuse me? What does that mean?” Matilda doesn’t look one bit happy.
“No, mom. She’s my Kung-Fu Master, Matilda, she’s always happy to see me healthy so I can help her with her revenge – you’ll understand when we get to that part of the story.” You clarify.
“Exactly.” Matilda nods.
“If you say so, Johnny.” Mom doesn’t buy it.

File: 040.png (1.81 MB, 1950x1500)

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>>3510617

“The one hiding is Yu Yan, and the one driving is Nariko.”
“It’s an honor to meet you, Mrs. Ando.” Nariko bows, even though she should be paying attention to the road.
“Oh the honor is all mine! But you look rather sad compared to the others, did something happen?” Mom is worried. She can tell when someone is troubled.
“No need to worry, I’m just doing my best like your beautiful children always tell me to do.” Your humble OG hobo replies.

“My, my, but a tenacious girl like you seems to lack some recognition! Sweetie, get the hearse closer to them.” Mom asks and you oblige. Mom stretches over you to start headpatting Nariko. “You’re such a good girl…” Nariko has a silly smile on her tomato colored face.
“Amelia, take the wheel, I want to headpat her as well.”
“O.K.!” Amelia manages to grab the thing before the vehicle gets out of control.

Thanks to the over stimulation on your OG Hobo’s delicate head, she starts getting out of control and somehow makes her Rickshaw go extremely fast and away from you. They are ahead in 1st place with a hefty lead now. Whoops…

“That could have been dangerous!” Mom just noticed it. “Let’s try to keep our arms and heads inside the vehicle at all times from now on, alright?”
“Right!” You and Amelia say in unison, despite your sister not breaking any rules.

It’s time to aid or to sabotage! Pick 2 teams! 1 you want to help and 1 you want to sabotage! Then Roll 1d100! Same as before!

(Last reply of the day, we continue tomorrow!)

Rolled 49 (1d100)

>>3510618
>Aid Constance
She's a good girl. We can also introduce her to our Mom if she gets close enough

>Sabotage Howie
That fucker is getting a bit to comfortable

Rolled 83 (1d100)

>>3510618
Aid
>SPR

Sabotage
>Fuck Howie

Rolled 5 (1d100)

>>3510618
Help
>the Calamity Clinic Collision

Sabatoge
>SPR

>>3510639
Because fuck you, that's why.

>>3510681
How about you take that 5 and shove it where the sun don't shine you greasy wanker.

>>3510690
How about you kiss my saggy scrotum sack and piss off instead, mate.

>>3510692
I don't see why I should listen to a bawjaw. Get those balls out of your mouth then start talking.

>>3510699
This wee lad wants to go around like a grown man. Go suckle on your mamma's milk from her teet, you flea-bitten twat.

>>3510705
This little shit dances around mushrooms and talks about piskies an chime hours. Piss off back to Waterford before I use you to wipe me ass crack.

Rolled 46 (1d100)

>>3510618
>Aid
Charlie's team
>Sabotage
Howie's team

>>3510738
As if you even know how to, you howlin sheep shagger, I can smell your crusty erse crevice from here.

>>3510470
God damn Yu, don't tell people that shit in public!

>>3510618
Huh, never thought I'd see the day headpats function as nitro.

>>3510789
>>3510738
>>3510705
>>3510699
>>3510692
>>3510690
How about you brits just shut up, sit at the bar, and start drinking till you can't see.

Rolled 44 (1d100)

>>3510625
Support

Constance is cool

>>3510639
>>3510681
What happens when we both choose to aid and sabotage the same team?

>>3511020
They cancel each other!

>>3511034
So nothing happens?

>>3511035
Yeah... They'll get a drawing at least.

Reminder to those who haven't rolled you still can!

>>3511050
Oh great, Masen in a swimsuit. I've always wanted to see that...

Rolled 21 (1d100)

>>3510618

Help team hobo
Literally kill howie

Rolled 97 (1d100)

>>3510618
>Aid
Calamity Clinic Collision

>Sabotage
This is how we do it!

>>3511420
Good one anon

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Meanwhile inside the Ambulance, Dr. Calamity is the one driving because Constance can’t for obvious reasons. They are in the middle of the pack because the Doctor doesn’t want to hurt anyone.

“Uncle, I think it’s about time you let me drive.” Nurse Calamity is tired of waiting in the co-pilot seat.
“Dear niece, you and I know pretty well how… passionate you get behind the wheel. For everyone else’s safety, I don’t think it would be very responsible of me if I let you take the wheel.” Dr. Calamity is having none of it.
“…Dearest uncle, are you prepared to tell this cute little pumpkin we’re not trying our darnest to make her dream come true?” Kata is manipulating her uncle. Dr. Calamity takes a good look at the dreary looking mummy and makes a decision.

“I guess I wouldn’t have picked this profession if I wanted to stay out of trouble, have fun Kata!” Dr. Calamity relents and lets her niece have some fun.
“I like to think accidents are bound to happen! HheHEHhehEhe…!” Katastrophic Calamity just laughed like her uncle. Eerie.

The Ambulance is going crazy fast all of sudden and starts to go up the ranks! For some reason, she’s hitting the other cars for seemingly random reasons, including yours – leave you a couple of positions behind! You heard Constance apologizing for the Nurse’s actions.

File: 042.png (1.83 MB, 1950x1500)

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>>3512120

Meanwhile inside the Transam 20000. Alfred is driving as fast as he can, Maggie is in the copilot seat and Reid is on the back.

“A-Allie, we’re dead last! W-What are we going to do? Tell me your brilliant mind has like a really good plan or something!” Maggie is panicking.
“…We continue as we are doing.” Alfred still believes in his plan. Whatever that may be.
“Al, I don’t want to sound rude. But if we keep going this way, we’re going to lose.” Reid has to interject. “Let me take the wheel instead.”
“…” Alfred is hesitating.

“We’re behind a duck, a horse and some random nobody on a pogo stick, we like can’t possibly be doing worse than that!” Maggie puts the obviously awful truth in display.
“Alright.” Alfred admits his fault and makes a sudden stop.

“Al, what are you doing?! We’re in the middle of a race! We can’t just stop like that!” Reid is losing it.
“…My bad.” Poor guy thought it would be safer to switch sides if he parked the car first.

Today, Alfred Brown learned Lv. 1 Driving is not enough to win a race…


You, on the other hand, are 4th now and this is the last stretch of the beach portion of the race. You have a feeling some racers are going to say goodbye soon…

What do you do?

>Take your lead back, gosh darn it!
>Try to crash one of the cars close to you! (Specify who)
>Keep your pace, you’re basically leading anyway – so no need to rush anymore.
>Write In.

>>3512125
>Distract Howie by telling him that he will always be a spineless wuss who deserved to be crammed inside a locker by Blake.

Rolled 18 (1d100)

>>3512125
>>Try to crash one of the cars close to you! (HOWIEEEEEEEE!)

>>3512125
>>Try to crash one of the cars close to you! (Specify who)
KILL HOWIE!

>>3512152
>>3512155
>>3512156

Please roll! Best of 4!

Rolled 69 (1d100)

>>3512170
eat shit, Howie

Rolled 93 (1d100)

>>3512170

Rolled 6 (1d100)

>>3512170

Rolled 49 (1d100)

>>3512175
Now that Howie is out of the picture I personally look forward to introducing Mom to Constance, I'm sure she'd love that adorable little Mummy

File: 043.png (603 KB, 600x512)

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We’re back at the announcer table with Bastet and Philonune!

“So the teams are getting closer to the end of the first area! They just need to past that giant gate and they will arrive at a safe zone before the next one, right?” Bastet comments.
“Yes. And those gates are slowly closing, so they need to move fast or else they will be disqualified.” Philonune clarifies.
“So what’s next for our contestants?”

“The Jungle zone.”
“That’s awfully similar to the Beach one…”
“Yes. There is an obvious lack of creativity and budgeting from our staff.”

“…So what’s really different about it?”
“The narrow paths are no more! In fact, you could say they are wider than ever! And the wildlife could be difficult for some to manage.”
“…Sounds boring. Who planned this crap again? The Judges?!” Bastet jokes.

Both Philonune and Bastet laugh at the snarky joke and that’s the end for this segment.

Back to the race.

Howie is awfully close to you in the standings, you perhaps should take him out of the equation before he turns into a thorn in your side – much like in real life.

“Do you think it would be a bad idea if I crashed into someone? The road is getting narrower and I think it would be great to take someone I hate out.” You ask your family.
“You mean that dumb ass that’s flipping us off right now.” Amelia points forward and you can see Twist aggressively making fun of you with half his body out of the window. They are 3rd just because of a miscalculation.
“Try to hit them on the right edge of the back of the car, maybe we can turn them over!” Mom is pretty sadistic when she wants to.

“I’m going for it then!” You start accelerating!

Howie, who is the one driving, is moving his stupid looking van in front of you each time you’re trying to past them.

“Fuck you, Johnny! I don’t even know how to drive and I’m better than you! Imagine if you fought fair when we first met! You would be DONE!” Howie is mocking you.

As soon as they shield you from going past them a third time, you do as mom says and gently collide with the right corner of their car and turn them sideways, then you go even faster making them start spiraling out of control!

“NOOOOOOooooooooo!” Howie shrieks as you see 7W157 falling down from their car, sadly Kaz was fast enough to grab him to safety… “FUCK YOUUUUUUUU…!”

“That kid has issues.” Mom doesn’t even know Howie and dislikes him already.
“Mom, he’s the worst! He makes half of the sleazebags around here look decent.” Amelia is fuming just thinking about all the stupid things Howie has done to you all.
“I hope we won’t have to see him again.” Mom isn’t even interested in talking about him. He’s that annoying.

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>>3512340

This leaves you at 5th place as a group of cars managed to get past you, good thing this area of the track is almost over. You cross the giant gate and for some reason feel safer…


“But some teams didn’t make it! Let’s show them complaining about a fair result!” Welimor and hidden cameramen go to spy on the losers.

“Ngggh! How is that even possible?! We were consistently good! What went wrong, tell me?!” Linda is absolutely furious. Her team just lost the race. They got last place.
“Well, you decided to make a cripple drive, pal...” Mckenzie ended up driving the last portion of the area.

“It was between you and the mentally deficient man! What other choice did I have?!”
“…Drive yourself?” Barry breaks character.
“The top of this 3rd rate swimwear kept coming off! I couldn’t do anything! This isn’t fair!” Linda keeps complaining.

“You should have left those knockers be free if you wanted to win. Nobody was interested in watching them sag around anyway.” Mckenzie replies.
“S-Shut up, you perverted old man! How vulgar and trashy…! This is so unfair! AAAAAGH!”

The creator’s followers are no more.

“Sorry, Al, Maggie. I couldn’t do anything…” Masen feels terrible about their loss.
“It’s like fine…” Maggie is disappointed. “I-It’s fine, right…?” She turns to Alfred now wondering if what she said was correct.
“…Not it isn’t. But we will survive.” Alfred is irked. Losing so early must sting.
“W-We could enjoy the beach together in the meantime! I wonder where Catastrovania is?” Maggie looks around.

Team SPR is slightly pissed off…

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, FUCK! FUUUCK! FUUUUCK!” Jamie is kicking the sand and having a good old tantrum.
“It was fun.” Wilvy looks at the positives.
“…I mean we had a duck for a car, what else could you expect from us?” Gunther makes a valid point.

The Explosive Menace blew away their chances...

File: 045.png (1.91 MB, 1950x1500)

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>>3512342

It’s time to aid or to sabotage! Pick 2 teams! 1 you want to help and 1 you want to sabotage! Then Roll 1d100

Rolled 72 (1d100)

>>3512345
>Aid Ajna's Team
>Sabotage Howie's team

>>3512345
Aid our team so we can introduce mom to ream clinic.
Fuck howie fuck him up, flip his car over and end his life.

>>3512358
You can't aid Johnny's team. That's why we have it divided into 2 sections.

Also, you need to roll!

Rolled 3 (1d100)

>>3512345
>Aid Ajna
She's been at the bottom for a while now

>Sabotage B-WORM
I don't want any of the assembly members near Constance and that is final

Rolled 94 (1d100)

>>3512345
>Aid Ajna
I'm all for this Ajna bandwagon

>Sabotage Giorsal
Cause seriously, FUCK the judges

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Meanwhile inside the Mad Vehicle. Trent is the one driving, Blake is shouting profanities from the co-pilot seat to the other vehicles. Ajna is still hiding in the backseat, afraid of even coming out now more than ever thanks to her bikini.

“OH SHIT, what happened to those 3 fuckos that were behind us!?” Blake is angrier than ever. “I still have more shit to throw at ‘em!
“They fucking lost, you dipshit! I told ya if we spent too much time in the back we’re going to get fucked.” Trent, the more intelligent of the two, shouts back.
“Then what the fuck are you waiting for? Get us to FIRST!”
“I’ve been waiting for THIS SHIT!” Trent stomps the gas pedal and go faster than ever before! They are flying through the competition!

“Hey asshole, aren’t these groups of 3?! Where is your sack of shit partner?” Blake just realized this after noticing everyone is competing in trios, sans some exceptions.
“Now you noticed!? No wonder you fucking died braindead.”

“Oh found him, err… her! Hey! HEY!”
“Ngh…” Ajna is trembling in fear.
“Say something you BITCH!”
“H..h..h…h..h…help…” Ajna whispers.

“Fuck her, she’s shy. Are bitches like her your type? Or should we throw her out?!” Blake asks Trent.
“Hold the wheel for a second.” Trent moves to the back seat where Ajna is laying. Blake miraculously takes control and manage to salvage the situation. “What do we have here?!”

“Don’t drop the wheel like that, you FUCKER!” Blake is mad. It’s kind of indistinguishable from his normal mood. “Guess I’m going to DESTROY some RETARDS now!”

“You better say something.” Trent stares at Ajna.
“…” Ajna froze 5 minutes ago. Trent pulls her out in the air and starts analyzing her body, then he puts Ajna on his lap.
“You’re mine from now on.” Trent’s creepy smile is not something anyone should see. “DRIVE FASTER, BLAKE!”

They will be trouble from now on.

File: 047.png (1.89 MB, 1950x1500)

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>>3512545

Meanwhile at the shitty car.

B-Worm wondered where did it all go wrong again. He managed to earn a hefty lead thanks to his driving skills and was seeking 1st place.

But sometimes there are people who want to prove their worth when questioned, as if it’s necessary to overthrow the good work laid out to show you and your peers a crude imitation of what you had done before. But what hurt him the most wasn’t the fact Sasha wanted to prove she can drive, but he wasn’t the one who called Sasha useless, so why did he need to pay for this…? Now they have dropped several places in the race and B-WORM only feels like crying now.

You are clinging onto 4th place. You’re beginning the jungle level and it appears to be nothing out of the ordinary, except there is no pavement – just the soil for you to drive on.

What do you do?

>Take first place! Time to show your superiority!
>You feel like there is a trick to this place. So you should proceed with caution.
>Try to crash one of the cars close to you! (Specify who)
>Write In.

>>3512547
>You feel like there is a trick to this place. So you should proceed with caution.

let's try to stay in a relative good position

>>3512547
>Slow down a bit so you could meet up with team Nina.

>>3512548
>>3512558
my vote can go towards that

>>3512548
>>3512558
I can support these, let the people in first test out the gimmicks. Also Nina and Mom

>>3512558
>>3512566
>>3512579
Please roll 1d100! Best of 4!

Rolled 65 (1d100)

>>3512582

Rolled 95 (1d100)

>>3512582
Make sure to give a cheeky wave at Vladimir while slowing down

Rolled 5 (1d100)

>>3512582

>>3512586
Valdemar
I'm terrible at remembering

Rolled 50 (1d100)

>>3512545
>Trent pulls her out in the air and starts analyzing her body, then he puts Ajna on his lap.
>“You’re mine from now on.” Trent’s creepy smile is not something anyone should see. “DRIVE FASTER, BLAKE!”
Wow, I don't hate Trent now

>>3512606
Wow, I hate Trent now*

>>3512606
>>3512609
It is really fucked up

>>3512639
>>3512606
It's called being a hot-blooded man, anons.

>>3512547
Could we get Neko in the swimsuit though?

>>3512664
There's being a hootblooded man and then there's making a very shy girl who's in an almost catatonic state sit on your lap with a creepy smile

>>3512677
It's all good, baby. She didn't say no.

>>3512677
I'm sure he dosnt mean anything terrible by it. I hope. I like trent, I love trent I hope hes not that baad

>>3512677
Agreed. This is a whole different tier from him talking about Scarlet's ass

>>3512690
I'm sure Trent's saying the same thing right now

>>3512707
>I'm sure he dosnt mean anything terrible by it
Anon, I get you like Trent but what other way could you interpret him picking her up, placing her on his lap, and saying “You’re mine from now on.”

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>>3512547

“…Well, that explains the weird creatures around.” Mom is understanding the one big problem you are into.
“Mine is a cute little bear on a cloud! Saraswati is kind of moody, but she’s otherwise great! Except for the time she backstabbed me…” Amelia recounts. “But I deeply regret everything I did and said back then! So she was right all along!”
“To what extent?” You wonder. She’s stubborn and one part of you still believes she wouldn’t have minded if she hurt you to make you stay put.

“To the extend I’m really really sorry! Johnny, I thought you didn’t like me anymore, but today I realize I was completely wrong! I thought you were going to pick someone else to team up with, but you did this all just for us! Yeah, you’re a little dumb sometimes, but now I’m sure your heart is in the right place and I couldn’t be happier, big brother!” Amelia is all bubbly like old times. It warms your heart.
“You’re awesome too, Amelia.” You heartily replied along with a smile.
“…I wonder what happened, it’s hard for me to picture you both fighting.” Mom is deeply concerned.
“We will get there, mom.” You respond to her concerns.

You notice from the corner of your eye Nina’s scooter moving up places, you feel like you should present them both. You make the hearse go slower, and without noticing – you hinder The Cultists’ motor thingy’s movements slowing them down. You give Valdemar a cheeky hand wave. He looks annoyed. Now you’re leveled with Nina.

“Hey Mom, this is Nina, my ex—… er, I mean teacher and leader of our wacky group.”
“Uh…? Johnny?” Nina is confused. She’s the one driving the scooter while in the extra attached seat are Neko and Carmella.
“Hey, Nina! This is Mom!”
“Hi, sweetie! Love the hair! I wonder how you maintain it.” Mom is supportive as always.

“T-thanks, Miss… uh?” Nina looks nervous. “Should I say Ando or Tomah?” She murmurs.
“I never got to be Miss Ando! Just call me Ema!” Your mom giggles.
“It’s very nice to m-meet you!” Nina is 100% nervous.
“Mom, she wasn’t in a good place in the beginning, but now she’s the most reliable member we have!” Amelia compliments Nina.

“Thank you, Amelia. But I’m not so sure about that, everyone contributes a lot to the group for me to pretend otherwise – and I have always been more of a burden than anything else. Don’t get me wrong, I’m doing all I can to rectify it.” Nina is flattered but she thinks it’s not true. To think at one point Amelia hated Nina.
“Oh my, don’t be so hard on yourself! Why don’t you try smiling the same way when you saw my son? It’s such a pretty smile!” What is your mom trying to say?

File: 049.png (1.91 MB, 1950x1500)

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>>3512788

“I-I did…?” Nina blushes. “I-I don’t think I did.”
“Johnny, this is worrying me, you have so many girls in love with you… Don’t take advantage of them, please!”
“I don’t think that’s true in this case.” You are blunt about it. Who cares if Amelia hears it? She’s not going to remember later.
“What makes you say that? The age gap? I can tell when a girl has a thing for my son! Like that one over there thinks nothing of you!” She points at Neko.
“I… W-What?!” T_T Neko had her guard down.

“Either way, have some confidence, girl! It’s going to take you far! Even in love!” Your mom winks at Nina who looks extremely embarrassed. You as well – Amelia is giggling in the back of the hearse.

“A-Anyway! We should get back to racing!” You are too embarrassed by your mother’s comments. Not all the girls you know have a thing for you! But wouldn’t that be great…?

This section of the race seems to be trouble for the first positions, seems like the Ambulance had problems with some monkeys… One part of you thinks you’re close to the next gate.

It’s time to aid or to sabotage! Pick 2 teams! 1 you want to help and 1 you want to sabotage! Then Roll 1d100.

>>3512668
Sorry Anon, I read that too late. I will try better next time.

>>3512793
>Aid Team Ruby
>Sabotage Team Rob

Rolled 54 (1d100)

>>3512800

Rolled 34 (1d100)

>>3512793
>Aid
Uh, who should we even aid at this point?

I guess I'll go far Scarlets team, she's been behind a lot

>Sabotage
Giorsal's team

>>3512793
>Aid Osgood's group

>Sabotage Howie

Because fuck Howie.

Rolled 93 (1d100)

>>3512793
>>3512817
Damnit, forgot my roll.

Rolled 76 (1d100)

>>3512793
>Aid Scarlett's team
>Sabotage Team Rob

Rolled 95 (1d100)

>>3512793
Help
>Ruby is better than Scalet, don’t at me

Sabotage
>this is how we do it

Because Howie and Twist cannot be fucked over enough

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>>3512793
Don't worry about it. I love everything about this.
>INTRODUCTIONS
>Henry finding out his friends made their own group
>Big family hug time
>MOORIKO
>Kata's big CALAMITIES
>Trent liking small women
>DAT EMOTION

10/10

>>3512857
>>3512849
>>3512793
Maybe this drawing then having Ruby sitting on Osgood's lap?

>>3512788
>“To the extend I’m really really sorry! Johnny, I thought you didn’t like me anymore, but today I realize I was completely wrong! I thought you were going to pick someone else to team up with, but you did this all just for us! Yeah, you’re a little dumb sometimes, but now I’m sure your heart is in the right place and I couldn’t be happier, big brother!” Amelia is all bubbly like old times. It warms your heart.
It's nice to see how happy we've made Amelia

Too bad she'll forget all of this...

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Meanwhile inside Osgood’s van. Surprisingly, Bradford is the one driving, both Osgood and Ruby are spending quality time together in the backseat, cuddling and kissing for the whole ride. Which is the reason why they have done so poorly so far. Bradford doesn’t seem to mind though.

“I love you so much, my prince of comeback! You’re the sweetest! Thank you for giving me another chance! I swear, I’m going to stop nagging, give you all the space you want, drop all the fitness stuff and forget about marriage, everything to make you happy!” Ruby is really in love.
“No, don’t do that. Nag me all you want. Do all the things you love. Ruby, I love you for who you are, my precious little sweetie!”
“Awwww! Osgood!” They keep kissing each other.

“Aaah love. Such a wonderful thing.” Bradford is smiling ear to ear while doing an awful job driving.

“Hey my beautiful prince, come here for a second…” Ruby looks playful, Osgood gets closer and she whispers something to his ear. Osgood stupid smile does an 180 and quickly starts panicking. She pushes Ruby aside and jump on the co-pilot seat.

“W-What’s wrong?” Bradford looks concerned.
“Move! Now!” Osgood throws Bradford to the back of the van. Then he starts driving 90 times faster than Bradford ever hope he could.

“What’s wrong with this brute?! How can you leave your lady hanging just like that?!” Bradford is still bewildered after what just happened.
“I-I don’t know what’s wrong either…” Ruby is really concerned as well.

“Where is he?! WHERE THE FUCK IS HE?!” Osgood has lost his marbles in pursuit of someone, but who…? At least they are going up the ranks…

File: 051.png (1.89 MB, 1950x1500)

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>>3512924

Meanwhile where the Lion thing is.

Giorsal looks devastated, they wasted all their coins now and the machine isn’t working anymore. It was bound to happen, but you expect the ex-president to have more money than that.

“Whyyyyyyyyyy?! Nothing good happens in my life! Everything goes wrong and wrong and wrong!!” Giorsal is disconsolate on her knees and hands on the ground.

Esperanza appears next to her and grabs Giorsal’s shoulder. Then it becomes clear, she has one quarter more and this one has a string attached. The solution they needed!

You find yourself in 3rd place with most of your friends surrounding you, this cannot be any better but… You have the bad feeling this area is getting to an end, and with that – another bunch of players are going to lose.

What do you do?

>Smash a nearby team! (Specify who)
>Keep your pace. Better safe than sorry.
>Try to go even faster! Take the lead!
>Maybe go behind a little so you can interfere with a team that’s in the middle pack. (Specify who)
>Write In.

>>3512924
She's way too good for Osgood. I feel bad for her

>>3512927
>Try to go even faster! Take the lead!
Say Hi to Constance

>>3512927
>Smash a nearby team! (Specify who)
Good luck, Charlie
Nothing personnel.

>>3512927
>Catch up to Constance

>>3512928
>>3512931

Trying to catching up with Constance won! Please roll 1d100! Best of 4!

Rolled 27 (1d100)

>>3512941

Rolled 46 (1d100)

>>3512941

Rolled 64 (1d100)

>>3512941

Rolled 6 (1d100)

>>3512941

>>3512950
>>3512947
>>3512943
>>3512942
yikes

>>3512924
Poor girl, way to good for his dumbass

>>3512545
Its like watching a pair of initiate Angry Marines.

>>3512606
Better him than Osgood.
>>3512609
>>3512639
He won't run like a bitch though.

Rolled 74 (1d100)

>>3512941

>>3512728
You are my girlfriend?

>>3512793
I wanted us to slip up and accidentally admit we were an item that did things, whats the roll for that?

>>3512970
>He won't run like a bitch though.
Yeah but he'll sexually harass the shit out of random depressed women

>>3512974
Yeah he put her on his lap and claimed that she was his and she's clearly very uncomfortable about it

>>3512996
M-maybe she'll be mindbroken and then overcome her crippling anxiety with the power of love and they'll live happily ever after!

Just like in my Doujins

File: 052.png (372 KB, 600x512)

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We’re back at the announcer table with Bastet and Philonune!


“…Bishop to e6.” Bastet makes her play. The commentators are playing chess, once they realize the cameras are on – they throw away the board. “Woah! The race is really heating up! Who the fuck is winning…?”
“That adorable little piece of archeology and her medical staff!” Philonune responds. “And you’re right, Bastet – things are going to start heating up because the next section is the volcano! Be careful with the lava, one touch and that’s all she wrote!”
“…So this is just an island and we’re using what we have for the track. Right?”
“yUP.” Philonune nods.

And that’s it for this let down of a segment.

Back to the race!

“I forgot to ask but is this little mummy girl is participating as well?” Mom wonders about Constance.
“You want to meet her, mom? She’s ahead in the ambulance!” Amelia happily points out.
“…Kind of ironic knowing her story.” Mom cannot help to point out.
“Mom, we’re riding your hearse.” You break it to her.

“Johnny, I was the one who came up with the idea! It’s supposed to be funny!” Mom has a twisted sense of humor.
“…” Amelia will never find this tasteless joke funny, you in the other hand think it’s mildly entertaining.
“Anyway, let’s try to move ahead and cat—”

Someone crashes the back of the car!

“FOUR-EYES! I’M NOT FINISHED WITH YOU!” Oh god it’s Blake.
“Is that the car of the bully who beat you up unconscious or the one who got killed by the police car?” Mom wonders.
“Hey, Johnny! Look what I FOUND!” Trent is there as well. He’s pointing at Ajna semi-proudly. W-Why is Ajna there?! What’s going on?!

“Well, technically both...” Amelia responds instead.
“Hey Trent, what the fuck are you doing with Ajna!?” You shout.
“She has a name?! That makes things easier! C’MON AJNA TELL HER YOU’RE FINE!” Trent yells at the poor girl. Foam is coming out of her mouth. “HOW CAN I TEACH YOU SELF-WORTH IF YOU KEEP GOING UNCONCIOUS ON ME?!”

“W-What the fuck?!” You blurred out. “Why are you doing that?! I mean, leave her be!”
“No teammate of mine is going to be a sobbing mess, YOU HEAR ME?!”
“Mr. bully! You need to treat that poor girl more delicately or you’re not going to make any progress!” Mom is trying to help Trent for some reason with his stupid mission.

“I have to what?” Trent is confused.
“FUCK ALL THAT! I’M GOING TO KILL YA, FOUR-EYES!” Blake keeps crashing on you interrupting whatever mess is that.
“Fend him off, Johnny!” Amelia is afraid now.

File: 053.png (143 KB, 600x512)

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>>3513002

Sadly you couldn’t do much and ended losing some ground… But you managed to pass the gate before it closed.

“Pssst…! We have more losers for ya! Let’s listen to what they have to say!” Welimor and hidden cameramen go to spy on the next bunch of losers.

“My math was off…? How is this possible?” Conti can’t believe they lost.
“Why do you always act like you’re a super mathematician? You’re just a high school teacher.” Sewel has enough of Conti’s bullshit.
“High school Principal.” Conti corrects.
“I guess I don’t have it in me anymore, I truly lost my passion…” Craig laments this defeat.

The Poker Night Aces winning hand was a bust…

“Sorry Chewirton, we failed you.” Scarlet apologizes to the giant dog as tears keep falling down her face.
“Woof.” Chewirton doesn’t seem to mind.
“…I’m really sorry, Scarlet. We really tried, but it wasn’t meant to be.” Yukika apologizes. She’s trying to console Scarlet.
“Why don’t you just confess to the guy once this shit race finishes? I don’t see the point in doing it later.” Sammi doesn’t care one bit about losing.

Scarlet was kind of decent, wasn’t good enough again…


“So who thought again a tank is a vehicle for a race again?” Ammirati starts blaming people immediately. “I lost to my subordinates for crying out loud, how can I ever face them now?”
“The idea was to destroy the others. Why didn’t we ever shoot?!” Gordon is furious.
“…Don’t tell me it was the red button.” Ammirati just realizes.

“Another setback is not going to prevent the inevitable. I will stand tall at the end with the world at my feet.” Lloydington is enraged but focused in his future revenge.
“Hmph… What a sore loser.” Ammirati shrugs.

The Good guys never win in the end…

File: 054.png (2.08 MB, 1950x1500)

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>>3513004


It’s time to aid or to sabotage! Pick 2 teams! 1 you want to help and 1 you want to sabotage! Then Roll 1d100.

(Last reply of the day, we continue tomorrow!)

>>3513002
>TELL HER
Tell him*

>>3513006
>Aid
Charlie
>Sabotage
KILL HOWIE DAMNIT

Rolled 41 (1d100)

>>3513006
Forgot dice

Rolled 69 (1d100)

>>3513006
Help
>Henry

Sabatoge
>Terror Inducing Trio

Rolled 9 (1d100)

>>3513006
>Aid
Johnny's Dad

>Sabotage
Ka-shing

Rolled 8 (1d100)

>>3513006
kill howie

>>3512996
No she isn't, she's already panic attacked far away to lala land. And his face doesn't match the description more importantly.
>Yeah but he'll sexually harass the shit out of random depressed women
He hasn't though. Nothing so far has been sexual, stop projecting your oversensitive ideas on better characters than you.

>>3513002
Oh yeah, he's perfect for her. I wonder if he knows about what Osgood did and if he connected the dots.

Rolled 85 (1d100)

>Aid
WILDFLAME
>Sabotage
The judges.

>>3513006
> aid detective team 16
> kill howie

>>3513214
please roll!

Rolled 95 (1d100)

>>3513214
Sorry!

>>3513188
>No she isn't, she's already panic attacked far away to lala land. And his face doesn't match the description more importantly.
Yeah she was already fucking uncomfortable and clearly wanted to avoid him at all costs exactly cause she feared for this shit, she already had a run in with thugs and that scared her for life. When you fear for your life your aren't exactly in the mood be put on some scary strangers lap

>He hasn't though. Nothing so far has been sexual, stop projecting your oversensitive ideas on better characters than you.
Are you fucking serious? What do you think putting her on his lap and saying "you're mine now" means? If any politician did that for you think everybody would just say that it's normal? No they'd quickly point out that it is indeed sexual harassment. And I'm not being some oversensitive Tumblr user, I was completely fine with him admiring Scarlet's ass and harmless shit like that, but forcing a Catatonic girl who's having an panic attack is creepy as shit

You can still like him but denying that this isn't fucked up is just plain dumb

>>3513190
>he's perfect for her
.....

Rolled 25 (1d100)

>>3513006
>Aid
WILDFLAME

>Sabotage
Ka-shing

>>3513190
>he's perfect for her
I'm also kind of confused by this. Do you ship them?

I said it as a joke earlier but do you actually think he's gonna Mindbreak her like in some Doujin and she'll end up liking it?

>>3513512
Are you even reading the same posts as I am?
>>3513399
She wanted to avoid her team at all costs because their strangers, the fact it's Trent is irrelevant because she has no clue who she is, unless he was around when we talked to her at some point, I forgot if that happened or not. Don't think it did though.
>Are you fucking serious? What do you think putting her on his lap and saying "you're mine now" means?
The exact same thing when we got our hobos, pre mass confessions obviously, you ignoring what he immediately said to Johnny's Mom because your triggered by proxy doesn't change the fact your wrong for thinking its sexual harassment.
>but forcing a Catatonic girl who's having an panic attack is creepy as shit
Forcing her to what? From what he's been saying to Johnny he's been trying to help, or at least keep her from dying in the backseat from Brent's driving. You screaming he's doing something fucked up is the second most retarded thing I have seen since the two idiots getting to vote by themselves to attack her in her own room. Your dumbass is jumping to the same kind of wrong conclusion as those two dipshits over a throwaway line. So yes, you are just a triggered tumblerite. So shut the hell up and watch.
>he's perfect for her
Yeah, or as good as we'll be able to get on short notice to watch her, better than most of the alternatives. Like Howei, who would act exactly like you are acting like Trent is, or he would if he wasn't busy trying to start a fight with Johnny.

>>3513784
who he* is. not she.

>>3513784
It's not just the fact that they're strangers it's that they're loud and obnoxious strangers that you can easily tell are delinquents. If Ajna was paired with, say, Amelia then she'd just be awkwardly sitting in the corner, she wouldn't go full on catatonic. We've seen as much

>The exact same thing when we got our hobos, pre mass confessions obviously
? Yeah but we didn't put them on our lap

>you ignoring what he immediately said to Johnny's Mom because your triggered by proxy doesn't change the fact your wrong for thinking its sexual harassment.
You're ignoring the entire context. First of all Blake found her and then asked if she was Trent's type, then he went over to her and started at her body, and then placed her on his lap. Don't take my word for it go back and reread it, it's explicitly stated that he analyses her body. There's obviously a sexual connotation, you don't just put someone on your lap for no reason

>Forcing her to what?
Uh, sit on his fucking lap?

>From what he's been saying to Johnny he's been trying to help
How is putting her on his lap and saying that she's his helping though? It isn't, like at all. Just cause he wants her to represent the team better doesn't mean that's the only reason he's doing all this

>or at least keep her from dying in the backseat from Brent's driving
But he's making everything worse. He's not retarded like Blake, he actually has common sense and should he able to clearly establish a link between her freaking out and him talking to her. He clearly just doesn't care

>Your dumbass is jumping to the same kind of wrong conclusion as those two dipshits over a throwaway line. So yes, you are just a triggered tumblerite. So shut the hell up and watch.
Except no, he fucking is. You have yet to explain why he's doing what he's actually fucking doing and just made the assumption that he's only trying to help her cause he said that he didn't want his teammate to look pathetic. You have to be an actual, certified retard to think that him looking at her body, putting her on his lap, and saying that she is his has no sexual intent. You call me a tumblrite like I'm dealing out about the tiniest shit, but no, I didn't say anything when he did something tame like admiring Scarlet's ass, this is someone that's actually pretty messed up and you're clearly just defending him cause he's a character you like and therefore you need to justify actions lile this and ignore the context and call others retards when they argue against it. Get fucking over ourself

>Yeah, or as good as we'll be able to get on short notice to watch her, better than most of the alternatives.
Not at all. Most of the people we know aren't brutish delinquents who yell at her for everything she does.

And also, why the fuck would you use fucking Howie as an example? Nobody in their right mind would suggest him. Don't just chose the worst possible example and compared them to make Trent look better

File: 055.png (141 KB, 600x512)

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Meanwhile where the motorcycle is. Richard is the one driving it, Mickey and Double J are sitting in the extra attached seat. The latter is working on the motorcycle adding something to it…

“Is it ready?” Richard asks Double J who looks really busy.
“…It is.” Double J gives Richard a thumb up, then goes back to his seat.
“W-What’s that…?” Mickey is confused.

“You’ll see in just a second...” Richard smirks. “Hold on tight.” He presses a button on the bike’s handlebar, and they start going incredibly fast leaving almost all the competition behind!

“Anyone you don’t like, kid?” Double J asks Mickey as they are holding on their seat for their dear life. He doesn’t seem to care about their incredible speed one bit.
“AaaaaaaaaAAaaaAah!!” A frightened Mickey yells. Their vehicle starts slowing down as the boost is done.

“…Did you hear me?” Double J wonders.
“I… did! I did…” Mickey is calming down. “Uhm... I don’t like Twister!”
“Which car has Twister in it?”
“The van!”
“The ugly one or the really ugly one?”

“Uuh… the darker one?” Mickey points to the correct one.
“Alright.”

Double J drops a bomb of sorts that he has been storing in a box on his lap. The thing ends up exploding in front of Howie and company, making an eruption of lava happen underneath them, causing them to lose track of things and move back to the bottom of the standings. They managed to survive somehow.

“Woah, that looked pretty!” Mickey is enjoying the explosions.
“Hey Double J, can you enhance the bike again? We aren’t still on top.”
“Aye, aye.” Jeff Jefferson is looking at the motorcycle again.

They could turn to be more troublesome than you expected…

File: 056.png (2.09 MB, 1950x1500)

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>>3514265

Everyone is having trouble with the lava splurging from different places, obstructing the way up ahead. You’re no exception, but you are navigating around these obstacles without suffering any damage – leaving you in the middle of the pack. You’re 12th place as of now.

What do you do?

>Smash a nearby team! (Specify who)
>Try to get a little ahead. You don’t want to risk losing at this stage.
>Try to go even faster! Go really higher up!
>Write In.

>>3514270
>>Try to go even faster! Go really higher up!
It's time for us to get back in the race

>>3514270
>>Try to go even faster! Go really higher up!
Mom still never got to meet Constance

>>3514270
>Try to get a little ahead. You don’t want to risk losing at this stage.

>>3514270
>Try to go even faster! Go really higher up!