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>>3355485
first for eyepatches

>>3355485
Rose is best!

FUCK YEAH

>>3355485
>and no-time champion of the bar quiz bowl
It hurts...

Here's hoping for some Rose-on-Rose action tonight!

Can someone give a basic rundown rundown for newcomers?

>>3355495
That would bring about the apocalypse anon

First for I will fucking Amber Google's offices.

>>3355498
All those links in the OP, and you can't be arsed to read one?

It's Fuck Quest. We fuck. And we quest. There's lewds and shadowruns. It really can't be summed up better than that.

>>3355498
alabaster soliloquy fucks a lot.

>>3355498
You are Alabaster Soliloquy, hot-shit destroyer of anime pussy and five time champion of the North High Quiz Bowl

The first sentence basically summarizes it all

>>3355504
Fair enough.

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You and Rose watch from backstage as Whitney sits in the hotseat opposite the host of the Daily Show.

"I get it," he's saying. "We all go through embarrassing phases as teenagers."

"Yeah! Exactly!"

"You do the whole goth thing, or you get mohawk, or you get into cosplay -- or you go around calling people the N word."

Whitney smiles and nods along as the audience laughs. She seems unaware she's the object of mockery here.

He leans in, holding a pen between the fingers of both hands. "So tell us straight now. Is it true? I mean--"

"No, no, that's fake. That's totally fake news. Listen. I wasn't using it all the time."

"So you did use it, though--"

"I had a slip of the tongue--"

"How is that? Just take me through it. How does a slip like that happen? Were you trying to say 'niggardly' and you stuttered, or..."

Rose has her hand to her lips, watching through narrow eyes, holding her breath.

"I had this friend, see? Well. Not even really a friend. He was this kid who hung out with my boyfriend. And he said ni-- he said that word, like, constantly. So one day I just had it with him. And I said Stackleford -- that's his name -- I said Stackleford, don't you say that word! Don't you say it! Because I have a lot of black friends, and there's black people in my family tree, so that hurts my heart! That's what I said. I said, Stackleford don't you say ni-- don't you say it! It hurts my heart to hear that word! Like that. Get it?"

"Uh huh. Only... Ms. Darkbloom, you talk about this person as if he's some distant memory from your past. But he works at your company."

On one of the monitors backstage, you can see that they're displaying an employee photo of Stackleford, from back when he was fat -- complete, as always, with his slightly slackjawed leer and the pussy deflector on his forehead. In the corner, it says "file photo".

"This is him, yes?" The host asks. "Boyd Stackleford?"

"Yeah. But... I didn't know he still works for me..." She rubs the back of her head.

"You didn't... you didn't know he works for you!" the host is stupefied. "Ms. Darkbloom, you played at an employees-only tennis match with the man just a couple weeks ago. How did you not know he's an employee of yours?"

"That's the thing about Stackleford!" Whitney says. "See. He's not a friend, right? He's just sort of there for no reason. He just hangs around. Like a fart."

The host laughs despite himself. "So you didn't realize that just because he attended an employees-only event, that meant he was -- you know -- an employee."

"Yes! And actually..." She pauses. Then, pointing: "Is that camera on me right now?"

The host says yes.

"Zoom it in closer, then. Closer -- yeah, good." On the display monitors, her face utterly fills the frame. "Stackleford -- ya fired."

"You're firing him on national TV," the host says, half questioning, half just reveling in how batshit this is.

"Yep. He's fired now. Fired for sure. Problem solved."

>>3355519
Holy shit. The absolute state of Stackleford.

>>3355519
I'd honestly rather watch Whitney than Trevor Noah.

>>3355519
I can't believe Stackleford is fucking dead.

>>3355519
KEK

>>3355519
Such a good CEO

>>3355519
I've been waiting to see this for so long

>>3355519
it's too early in the episode for my side's to be this destroyed. Mercy OP Studios, I beg of you!

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"And one more thing," Whitney says. "I just wanna add onto this. I have this guy on my board, Tyrus Kang... and he said... he's black -- and he said..."

"Oh my god," you mutter. "Didn't you tell her not to do this? She's gonna start rambling about that pass thing. Goddamn it, Rose. You had one fucking job--"

"I told her not to!" Rose hisses. "What do you want me to do, Alabaster? I told her so many times! Fuck!"

But thankfully, the host is talking over her, and this derails her train of thought: "--to say you're not a racist, then?"

"Absolutely. Abso-positutely. I'm the least racist person I know."

"So you know a lot of racists, then?" He asks facetiously, laughing.

"Now -- now hold on," Whitney responds, taking that little jab with utter seriousness. She points at him. "That's a gotcha. You're trying to gotcha me."

"I'm just having a little--"

"The answer to that gotcha is, well, all of my friends are non-racist. But I'm the least racist non-racist I know. Got it?"

He laughs again. "I think I get it."

"Good. I know that might be tough for you to understand."

He arches an eyebrow. "Why is that?"

Rose is rubbing her forehead so hard it seems like she's trying to dig a hole to the center of her brain. "No," she repeats. "No, no, no..."

"It's not the black thing!" Whitney shouts. She pounds a palm on the sleek black tabletop separating her from the host. "I'm saying it's because you're just -- look, forget that. It really hurts my heart that you would even think -- I mean, you're not even all black anyway, right? You're like maybe half black."

"I'm going to be ill," Rose says. "I can't watch. I can't -- I can't even --"

"Ms. Darkbloom, I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but I think you're just digging yourself deeper here. You're not doing a great job convincing me that--"

"What you gotta know about me," she says, "is I grew up -- so totally poor. Dirt poor. And so I didn't have a lot of former education--"

"Formal?"

"None of that, either. But you know, in despite of that, I've got a heart. I have such a heart, you wouldn't believe the size of the heart I have. It's humongous. And to hear people say these awful things about me... it hurts my humongous heart. It really does."

"Did you teach her that 'hurts my heart' shit?" You demand.

"Yes," Rose says, "but... goddamn it. It's not supposed to be like this. I just gave her a little spice cabinet, that's all--"

"What?"

"A spice cabinet! I taught her all these little phrases of contrition that she could spice her interview with. They're meant to be spices only! But she took the jar labeled 'hurts my heart' and just upended it into the pot..."

>>3355519
Blessed.

>>3355519
R.I.P Stackleford

>>3355540
Oh god it keeps getting better.

>>3355540
Fucking hell

>>3355540
Grand Wizard Whitney

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>>3355540
I can't stop reading it in the POTUS' voice holy fuck

>>3355540
>"And one more thing," Whitney says. "I just wanna add onto this. I have this guy on my board, Tyrus Kang... and he said... he's black -- and he said..."
>"Oh my god," you mutter. "Didn't you tell her not to do this? She's gonna start rambling about that pass thing. Goddamn it, Rose. You had one fucking job--"
>"I told her not to!" Rose hisses. "What do you want me to do, Alabaster? I told her so many times! Fuck!"
I actually couldn't breathe for a second there, oh my god

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At the interview table, Whitney is at a loss. She drops the subject of racism completely, just like that, and plows ahead to the next topic: "I think now is a good time for my announcement thingie. Cool?"

And the host, likewise at a loss -- utterly bewildered by Whitney, in fact -- leans back in his seat, nods uncertainty and motions at her with his pen. "Sure. Go ahead, Ms. Darkbloom."

"Yeah, so. I bought everyone in the audience a new car."

Now the host is even more confused. "Excuse me?" he sputters over the in-studio audience's mountingly excited whispers. "Hold on. You told our producers that this announcement was about a new privacy policy at your company."

"Yeah that was a lie. I just wanted some extra time to do this."

"I--" the host begins, but Whitney is already explaining:

"I always wanted to do that. You know, the Oprah thing. I hope you're not mad. Can I-- oh, I'm just gonna do it."

She stands up. "You're all getting cars!" She says. Pointing at individual audience members, each in turn, she begins to shout: "You get a car! And you get a car! And you get a car!"

Despite the host waving and gesticulating wildly to bring things back under control, the audience will not be mollified. They're on their feet, clapping and hooting. Whitney is off the stage entirely now, running back and forth along the front row, the audience's adulation feeding her energy as she points, and runs, and yells:

"You get a car! And you get a car! AND YOU GET A CAR! AND YOU! AND YOU! YOU'RE ALL GETTING A CAAAAAAAAAAA--

Season 3 OP (B): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gYG_4vJ4qNA

>>3355563
Oh my fucking god.
Are we the bad guys?
... eh, fuck it, who cares?

>>3355563
BASED

>>3355563
She is going to destroy this company

>>3355563
Whitney Darkbloom is going to save the world

>>3355563
>>3355573
Oh we are absolutely the bad guys.

But we're also fighting worse guys.

>>3355563
doing the Oprah thing on a show about how she isn't rascist

oh god I love Whitney so fucking much.

Wasn't the whole 'give away cars' Oprah thing actually filled with hidden terms and conditions, taxes and red tape?

>>3355592
You think Whitney knows that?

That's why Rose+Alabaster damage control exists

>>3355592
so wait, Whitney is more Oprah than Oprah now? Whitney for president.

>>3355592
Yeah, but knowing Whitney, she probably literally bought cars in cash for all the people in the audience.

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One evening at the Catachresis house, after dinner, you're in the kitchen helping Mom clean the dishes. Not because you want to help her or anything, but because you know she'll bitch at you if you don't offer. Might as well save the trouble. You stand side by side at the double-basin sink, wearing matching yellow elbow-length gloves, scrubbing stubborn bits of stuck-on char off pans. The scritch-scratch of your metal scrubbing sponges underpins your conversation.

"Cerise's birthday is coming up, isn't it?" Mom says. "She'll be 26, right?"

You nod yes.

"Is she seeing anyone?" Mom asks. "I can never get a straight answer when I ask her."

"It's... complicated," you say.

"Tch. Why is this such a hard question to answer!"

You shrug.

"Well, you're her little brother. It's your job to make sure she doesn't become a spinster, Alabaster!"

"How is that my job?" You demand. "She's a grown woman. Her love life is her problem."

"I don't want to hear it! Cerise's biological clock is ticking. It doesn't help matters that she lost a year to that horrible coma. You need to make sure she has a child to carry on the Soliloquy bloodline."

"Oh? And what about me? I'm the male heir, after all."

Mom glances over, looks you up and down, head to toe, disapprovingly. "I think Cerise had better carry on the bloodline," she says, frowning.

"Wow. Thanks for the vote of confidence. If there's anything you see about me that you don't like, blame yourself. These are your genetics."

"I'm just saying -- who would you even have a child with, anyway?" She idly dries a pan off with a dish rag. "There are hardly any suitable candidates interested in you. Whitney? You don't need to deal with a special-needs child right now."

"There are plenty of options."

"Oh, please! Don't tell me you're thinking of impregnating that strange little Vivian girl. She's basically a child herself. Labor would rip her in half! And aside from that, I think she probably has autism. So she definitely isn't fit to have your child."

You shudder.

"And certainly not Rose," Mom says. "You may as well marry a succubus. Not to mention that you're cousins."

"Once--"

"So who else is left, then?"

"Maybe I could settle down with Dr. Carte."

Mom's left eye twitches. "That old hag? Don't make me laugh. Her uterus is probably filled with sand!"

"Pfft. You're one to talk."

She swats you with her dish towel. "How dare you!"

>>3355606
>And aside from that, I think she probably has autism. So she definitely isn't fit to have your child."

>implying Vivian's and Alabaster's combined autism won't lead to a new generation of ubermensch

Get with the times, ma.

>>3355606
>Mom glances over, looks you up and down, head to toe, disapprovingly. "I think Cerise had better carry on the bloodline," she says, frowning.
Fucking DESTROYED

>"Maybe I could settle down with Dr. Carte."
yes please

>>3355606
C-Can we hire succubi? Is that a thing we can do?

>>3355621
I coulda sworn there was a couple that both had Downs and had a kid that was completely normal.

If we have a kid with Vivian, it might be the most normal person in existence.

>>3355606
>"I'm just saying -- who would you even have a child with, anyway?"
You, for one

>"There are hardly any suitable candidates interested in you. Whitney? You don't need to deal with a special-needs child right now."
>"There are plenty of options."
>"Oh, please! Don't tell me you're thinking of impregnating that strange little Vivian girl. She's basically a child herself. Labor would rip her in half! And aside from that, I think she probably has autism. So she definitely isn't fit to have your child."
>You shudder.
>"And certainly not Rose," Mom says. "You may as well marry a succubus. Not to mention that you're cousins."
>"Once--"
>"So who else is left, then?"
>"Maybe I could settle down with Dr. Carte."
>Mom's left eye twitches. "That old hag? Don't make me laugh. Her uterus is probably filled with sand!"
This, this is great

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You shrug. "Maybe I'll just have a kid with Rose2. That's what you're campaigning for, right?"

"I hardly know anymore," Mom says, turning back to the dishes in the sink, resuming scrubbing. Her tone loses its edge. "Maybe that really would be incest."

"Well, speaking of," you say with a smirk, "I could kill two birds with one stone for you -- maybe me and Cerise could..."

Mom chokes on her own breath, horrified. "Al-Alabaster! What a disgusting thing to joke about!"

"I bet we could even find a Mormon commune to do the marriage ceremony. And hey, you wouldn't have to worry about Cerise being an old maid anymore."

Now Mom is raining a hail of suppressing fire down on you: slapping you again and again with the soggy end of the dish towel, forcing you shield your face with both gloved hands. "Sorry -- sorry!" You laugh. "Forget I said anything!"

"Hmmph," she finally breathes, relenting. But you won't let that abuse pass without retaliation, so when she has her back turned again, you twist your own dish towel up and snap it loose against her back. It's more loud than painful, but it shocks her into a fury. When she wheels, grimacing, you stick your tongue out.

"You are the crudest, least respectful boy in the world!" She shouts. "I can't believe you!"

She shouts at you but her eyes are twinkling.

>>3355606
Wait she doesn't know? I thought it was common knowledge or at least Rose2 would've mentioned it

>>3355636
>She shouts at you but her eyes are twinkling.
god that's precious

>>3355636
Is it okay to have this much fun? Is something terrible going to happen soon?

>>3355636
Is our mom into us? I didn't know we were southern.

>>3355636
>She shouts at you but her eyes are twinkling.
I lover her

>>3355636
This is good. I like this.

>>3355642
Dude, read season 1 right the fuck now.

>>3355642
Welcome to Fuck Quest, where Alabaster fucks anything female-shaped. (Even the rabbit. Long story.)

>>3355592
actually, the Oprah car giveaway was done in good faith. the show even paid for most of the associated costs. what they didn't pay for was the gift tax, but they were up front about it and anyone who didn't want a car because of the tax got money instead.

>>3355653
And miss out on the ride? Fuck that!

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In the living room, Cerise and Rose are sitting across from Saul and Charlotte, who have also stopped by to visit. Mom sips chardonnay with the woman who is technically her niece as they laugh and reminisce about old times.

"And you remember --" Charlotte says, taking a sip from her fluted glass, "--that exchange student who showed up in your senior year? What was her name -- Samantha?"

"Oh god!" Mom laughs. "The slutty bunny?"

Cerise quirks an eyebrow. She, like you, is unused to hearing Mom speak so loosely -- at least when she isn't haranguing someone.

"That's her!" Charlotte says. She slaps at the air limply, the universal sign language of women gabbing. "That costume she always wore! I still can't believe she got away with it on school grounds. Bunny ears and everything!"

"I think just about every boy at school had a turn with her," Mom says. "She was from Omaha or something. Coming out to California must have corrupted the poor girl. Or they just raise them differently out in the flyover states."

"I heard that she actually moved out to the playboy mansion after high school," Charlotte says. "That's just a rumor... but you know what they say, right? Dress for the job you want..."

"Maybe I picked the wrong girl from North High," Saul muses, even as he puts an arm over Charlotte's shoulders and hugs her a bit closer.

"Saul! You're awful!" Charlotte says.

Rose is turning a bit green listening to her parents have this vaguely sexual conversation. As for you -- it's a side to your mother you've never seen before, this gossipy, carefree thing she's rekindled with Charlotte.

Glancing over your shoulder, past the edge of the living room and towards the stairs, you see two things.

First: Amber. She's on her way down. She stops halfway there, appraises the scene in the living room. At the bottom, she turns instead towards the empty dining room. It's the first you've seen of her all night long. She mostly avoids you when you visit, and you're just fine with that.

Second: Rose2, watching you from the top of the staircase, squatting, hands on the vertical rails like a prisoner in her cell. Her face is blank, but severe.

[ ] Stay in the living room.
[ ] See what Amber is up to.
[ ] Go upstairs with Rose2.

>>3355667
The ride will be here when you get back, anon, don't be a weenie.

>>3355667
>Not reading season 1
You're just making it less fun for yourself man

>>3355674
>[x] Stay in the living room.

>>3355674
>[x] See what Amber is up to.

>>3355674
>Smatters exists in canon
Oh god. There's no way.

>[x] See what Amber is up to.

Let's get some fucking plot. Or some Wii Sports. that works too.

>>3355674
>[x] Stay in the living room.

>>3355674
>[x] See what Amber is up to.

>>3355675
>>3355676
Fine. I'll just cave in to peer pressure then. See ya'll later when I trudge through two seasons.

>>3355674
>Smatters exists
10/13?

>[x] See what Amber is up to.

>>3355674
>[x] See what Amber is up to.
It is time

>>3355674
>"And you remember --" Charlotte says, taking a sip from her fluted glass, "--that exchange student who showed up in your senior year? What was her name -- Samantha?"
>"Oh god!" Mom laughs. "The slutty bunny?"
FUCKING WHAT?

>[x] Go upstairs with Rose2.
Since nobody else seems to care!

>>3355692
Enjoy the ride. It's a wild one. See you on the other side.

>>3355696
No anon it's

9/12 girls

1/1 boys

and 1/1 bunnies

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>>3355692
Good choice. You'll appreciate the ride a hell of a lot more once you're up to date.

>>3355674
[X] Rose2

>>3355674
>[x] See what Amber is up to.
Sometimes I can't stand some of you.

>>3355710
Current counter is:
10/12 Girls
1/1 Boys
0/1 Bunnies
0/4̫̝̺̼̳2̫͈̪̼̯͘ͅ1̘ Rampant AI

>>3355692
Wait you didn't even read season 2?

In that case read season 2 and then come back here as that is the only one necessary to this read this season as 2 and 3 take place in a different universe/timeline than season 1

>[x] See what Amber is up to.

Closing and writing!

>>3355729
God's in his heaven.

>>3355721
That's a lot of Viv-tans

>>3355732
It'll be the warmest wait of our lives.

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Checklist as of the end of episode 7. Who's next?

>>3355737
David

>>3355737
Galatea and Cerise. Simultaneously.

Smatters in the OVA, with Renee and Rose this time.

>>3355737
If that last vote is anything to go off of, Amber

>>3355737
>>3355744
Actually, wait wait wait. The OVA can be so much better. If Smatters 2.0 is the same age as our mother, she likely has kids the same age as us.

An entire harem of bunnygirl sisters.

>>3355636
Hahaha, yeah a joke, haha....

>>3355737
Goddamnit, I just noticed Smatters

>Very Unlikely
Fucking end me

>>3355748
>Not wanting to be the one to deflower and impregnate the bunny girl
The fuck is wrong with you

>>3355758
You're missing the forest for the trees, Anonymous-dono.

I want to deflower and impregnate six bunny girls.

>>3355754
That's just because we haven't actually met her yet, anon. Stranger things have happened, like Darkbloom going from 'Darkbloom Must Die' to 'Presumed Dead' to 'Likely' in the span of 6 episodes.

>>3355758
Mom won't have to worry about the Soliloquy bloodline not getting passed down now

>>3355760
We can do that after we fuck her anon

>>3355674
Wait wait wait

Aren't Saul and Charlotte bothered by the fact that they're talking to a dead woman?

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>[x] See what Amber is up to.

You excuse yourself on the premise of going to the kitchen for more drinks, but your object is really to see Amber -- something inexplicably draws you to this girl, even though you know she can only mean trouble. Even so, you think she must have answers, too -- and those are in short supply these days.

Amber is wearing her usual attire -- tanktop, panties, socks -- nothing else. She's at the table, on a laptop, focused intently on the screen. She eats a succulent-looking apple.

As you approach, she finally notices you. She glances up with a sly grin. "Want some?"

"Err--"

She hefts the apple up. "These are pretty good. Try a bite."

"No thanks."

"Oh, come on~" She tosses it at you without warning. By instinct, you grab for it, and barely catch it, clutching it close to your chest. You hold the apple like that, grimacing back at Amber.

She nods at you expectantly. "They're this new hybrid called Gran-Jazz. Super sweet, super sour. You'll love 'em."

Half expecting that she dosed the thing with some sort of hallucinogen or poison, you bite into it anyway. You're not sure why you do it -- you feel almost compelled to by an outside force. Your lips wrap around the dainty bite marks she left in the apple, the light brown bruises her teeth made in its pale white flesh. You bite down hard with a satisfying crunch, and enjoy the explosion of juice that slithers down your tongue, the tart but sugary flavor. There was no poison after all, no drug; other than the knowledge that you've shared an indirect kiss with Camelia herself, there's nothing at all unusual about this apple.

She was right, though -- it's really good.

"So whaddaya think? Did I make you into a convert?"

"Sure," you say. "I'll have to buy some next time I'm at the store."

"Hmm," she laughs to herself. "You're not as dumb of an asshole as I thought, then."

"What are you working on?" You ask.

"Shouldn't you be getting back?" Amber retorts. "You're working so hard to mom-cuck me and Rose. You don't want to lose your momentum now."

"Whatever," you say. You toss the apple back at her. As you hoped, this surprises her. She scrambles to pluck it from the air -- bobbles it, like a juggler, before bringing it back under control.

"Jerk!"

"Just repaying the favor. You know, if I steal your mom, that'll make you my little sister. So I was just showing you a little bit of brotherly courtesy by asking what you were working on."

"Don't make me sick," she says. She bites the apple, right where you bit it. Through a full mouth, she says: "Anyway, I don't need your help."

"Schoolwork, then?"

"Sort of." She swallows hard. "It's an extracurricular thing."

"What kind?"

"Not that you would care. But I'm running for student council president."

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>>3355485
I'm not late, you're late! Like hell I'm missing a rose episode!

>>3355797
Holy shit, I didn't even notice how weird that was

>>3355797
Off-screen, we can presume that Rose and/or Alabaster looped them in on this bit of weirdness and that there was a more emotional reunion between Mom/Charlotte we didn't see.

>>3355797
In the room right next to the terrorist who dragged us into her crazy adventures and killed the former CEO of the company we lead.

>>3355801
>There was no poison after all
OP...
>"I'm running for student council president."

#Catachresis2019

>>3355809
Hmm...

>>3355809
>and that there was a more emotional reunion between Mom/Charlotte we didn't see.
I would honestly love to see that scene

>>3355801
>other than the knowledge that you've shared an indirect kiss with Camelia herself
We did a little bit more than that

>You know, if I steal your mom, that'll make you my little sister
Wouldn't that make us her dad?

>>3355801
I can't tell whether the Adam/Eve/Apple subtext is Amber fucking with us or OP.

>>3355801
>all these repeated indirect kisses
Don't blame me if the mods delete this post, OP

>>3355801
>You know, if I steal your mom, that'll make you my little sister
Uhhh, are you fucking high OP?

>>3355822
>>3355838
He means claiming her mom as our mom, you silly-billies.

>>3355823
>I can't tell if OP is fucking with us!
What has always been the answer?

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You circle the table. On a graphics editing platform, Amber is making a poster for her campaign. It's definitely her work -- and you wonder whether she'll be able to get such a thing past the administration.

"Well -- good luck," you mutter. "You'll need it. Campaigning for StuCo is a drag, and it's not really worth it in the end."

You start for the kitchen to retrieve the promised drinks.

"Actually--" Amber says. "Hold on."

You turn.

"That's right. You were StuCo prez once upon a time, huh. You won a really tough campaign and all."

"Yeah."

"So..."

You squint at her. "Don't tell me -- are you asking me to help you?"

"Not that I want to debase myself like that... but the guy I'm running against..." she shudders. "He's got the entire fucking school under his thumb. He was running unopposed for a third straight term until I put my hat in the ring. I can't stand autocrats!"

You fold your arms. This story seems almost too perfect. You're wary.

"Trust me, I know the way Rose1 ran that school," she says. "It was a miracle you managed to beat her and that well-oiled political machine of hers. Well that's exactly what I'm up against, too. So some tricks of the trade would be appreciated. Strike a blow for freedom why don't you?"

"My best advice is to cheat," you say. "That's what I did." You expect this to throw her off her game, but:

"That's obvious. Of course I'm gonna cheat."

"Well... there you go. Problem solved."

"That motherfucker Auburn is gonna cheat too, though! Cheating isn't enough. I need an ace in the hole. I need..."

She puts a forefinger to her chin. She thinks for a turn. Then, she snaps her fingers.

"I need an endorsement!"

"Me?"

"A former StuCo Prez campaigning for the new blood. It's perfect! All I'd need is... an hour of your time one day... you make a little speech, voila. Then your brotherly duty is done."

[ ] I'll help you.
[ ] I won't help you.

>>3355865
[X] I'll help you

>>3355865
>[x] I'll help you.

>>3355865
>[x] I'll help you.

>>3355865
>[X] I'll help you.

It'll be hilarious if we get to school and Auburn is acting out his own version of Season 1.

>>3355865
This poster is fucking perfect, god damn.

There's no way she wins if we actually endorse her, she has to have an ulterior motive.
Only one way to find out.

>[x] I'll help you.

After all, who better to motivate the population of a public high school than the boyfriend of the richest and smartest girl in the universe?

>>3355865
>[x] I'll help you.

>>3355865
>[x] I won't help you.

>>3355865
>[x] I'll help you.

Every single time.

>>3355865
>That pic
Oh my god, I'm dying

>[x] I'll help you.
What kind of fag would pic the other option?

>>3355894
>>3355887

>>3355865

>Complains about an autocratic administration.

>Campaigns on a Communist platform.

I didn't know you were a Democrat Amber.

>[X] I'll help you.

>>3355865
>[x] I'll help you

>>3355914
>>Campaigns on a Communist platform.
We don't actually know the platform, we just know she's copying the propaganda, which, let's face it, works.

>>3355865

>[ ] I'll help you.

Once the proletariat rises up to take the reigns of the student council, we can finally progress as a society.

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>>3355918

>She's copying the propaganda, which, let's face it, works.

It pains me to admit how right you are. Since when did genocidal ideologies get so cool and hip with the kids nowadays?

Maybe my crotchy old man brain simply can't keep up anymore, or maybe humanity's doomed.

Either way, I get the luxury of seeing it and Amber's campaign burn to the ground.

Who's making the popcorn?

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>[x] I'll help you.

"I don't know who you think you're fooling," you say. "I know who you really are."

"Will you can it with this 'I know who you really are' shit? You sound like a schizo. Don't go totally crazy before I get some mileage out of your name I.D."

"I never agreed to help you," you say.

"Sure you did. You didn't say no."

"I--"

"Just look at this." She minimizes her current project -- as well as another, even more highly-questionable poster -- and pulls up a video. The boy she's running against actually put his campaign announcement on youtube. And even more shocking, the video has over 3,000 views.

He's a horrible vision, a clean-cut, button-down kind of guy, in a cream-colored shirt and dockers, wearing black rimmed glasses, with a swooped haircut, the very picture of nerd-chic. He'd be right at home in an Old Navy catalog. Or on the board of the Teenage Republicans, or the Young Democrats, or whatever other socially-conscious, youth-oriented bullshit he is definitely a part of. It goes without saying this asshole is high up in leadership at the National Honor Society, too -- that's a given. He makes your blood boil just looking at him, and that's before the ukulele kicks in.

Then come his lickspittles, the rest of the StuCo, each more cookie-cutter than the last, like cheap knockoffs of their chief. "We're the North High Student Council!" They say in soul-killing unison over the cloying music. "And we want you to vote!"

"That's right," the president says, hands folded neatly in front of him. "The election is on September 23rd. All StuCo positions are up for a vote. And on that note, I have wonderful news -- I plan to run for another term. Another term as president!"

"Turn this shit off already," you groan.

Amber closes the laptop's lid. "Fucking Raisin Brant," she sneers.

"--What?"

"Auburn Brantly. Raisin Brant. He's the fucking worst. He actually -- nevermind. Now you see, right? Why this election is important."

You half nod, half shrug.

"There's a pep rally for homecoming on Friday. Candidates are officially announcing there. Of course, fucking Raisin Brant played by his own rules and announced early... but anyway, you could come and give your endorsement there."

As awful of an idea as this is -- you agree. What can you say; you like knocking the establishment down a peg.

>>3355954
>That poster
She'll need all the help she can get

>>3355954
God I fucking love this girl.

>>3355954

>She made a fascist poster to go with the commie one.

Sasuga da na Amber-chan.

>>3355954
>Raisin Brant
If Whitney's Trumpisms are any indication, we definitely ought to encourage her to use this phrase in future debates.
This is student council. It's serious business, not a crowdfunded company that produces wool mittens for indoor/outdoor cats.

>>3355954
She has my vote!

>>3355979
Are you saying Kitten Mittens aren't serious business?

>>3355969
Work camps are as easy as helping the janitor for a two weeks as punishment. How will gulags be implemented at North High?

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>>3355979
>Not a crowdfunded company that produces wool mittens for indoor/outdoor cats.

That's a very specific kind of company there anon, why do I have a feeling you're not just pulling that example out of thin air?

I kinda want some kitten mittens now...

>>3355994
Reinforced portable classrooms.

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>>3355802
>>3355952
Friendly reminder that THIS is the best Kengan

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You meet Amber after class lets out on Friday. It's awkward, as always, to walk the halls of the school you burnt down five years ago. And you're not sure you should really be doing this at all. But you expect to extract your own fee for this assistance: you're going to demand some real answers from Amber when it's all over.

She meets you in an empty hall, by that little glass case that has a timeline of the presidents from North High's illustrious -- and not-so-illustrious -- history. Rose's term as president was followed by Brantly's; North High has suffered five uninterrupted years of rule by soulless bean-counters.

"Check it out," Amber says. She hands you a sheaf of papers. "I stayed up all night drafting my platform."

You read aloud, aghast. "Free lunch for all students... fire any teacher who assigns more than three hours' worth of homework in a single week... all vending machines required to carry morning-after pills? A marijuana dispensary on campus? An official resolution signed by North High recognizing Palestine as the only legitimate government in Gaza? What?"

"What do you think?" Amber asks, excited.

"You can't accomplish one quarter of this shit."

She frowns, and looks deflated. "Man did you sell out. I thought you of all people would know a thing or two about shooting for the moon in a StuCo campaign."

"What the fuck does Palestine have to do with StuCo--"

"You don't come to the table already compromising, Alabaster!" Amber pounds a fist in her palm. "You have to make wild demands at the start, so when you meet the other side in the middle, it's closer to what you want! That's the art of the deal!"

Students are filing past in the hallway perpendicular, towards the auditorium -- it's almost time for the pep rally.

Amber rifles through her bag and produces another sheaf of papers. "Look at this," she says. "This is what Raisin Brant wants to do. This is his actual platform."

You read this now, and it raises your blood pressure -- terrible flashbacks to Rose. "School lunches reduced in price by 25% over a two-year period... student-led curriculum review board working hand-in-hand with the administration... a five-year plan to repair the potholes in the parking lot... planning committee for a new pool... a winter culture festival?"

"Tepid bullshit!" Amber shouts "Who wants to vote for that! People want change, Alabaster. That's why I'm a fuckin' shoe-in."

You begin to speak, but you pause, as you catch a glimpse of something that makes your heart drop. Among the throng of students headed for the auditorium, is the current student council themselves -- and they're impossible to miss, the very blandness of their dress style making them ironically stand out.

But that's not what makes the bile rise in your throat. Because at the head of the pack is Auburn Brantly, and he's deep in conversation with Rose.

[ ] Confront her.
[ ] Bide your time -- surprise her when you take the stage at the pep rally.

>>3355989
>>3356001
>putting gloves on podiary-terminating limbs
I don't wear socks and shoes on my hands, I'll leave it at that.

>>3356039
Of fucking course she's here.

>[x] Bide your time -- surprise her when you take the stage at the pep rally.

>>3356039
>[x] Bide your time -- surprise her when you take the stage at the pep rally.

>>3356039
>[x] Bide your time -- surprise her when you take the stage at the pep rally.

>>3356039
>[X] Bide your time -- surprise her when you take the stage at the pep rally.
Clever girl

>>3356039
>[x] Bide your time -- surprise her when you take the stage at the pep rally.

>>3356039
Of fucking course.

>[x] Confront her.

Guaranteed she's literally only doing this because we are.

Also
>An official resolution signed by North High recognizing Palestine as the only legitimate government in Gaza?
Amazing.

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>>3356039

Just how deep does this rabbit hole go?

>[ ] Bide your time -- surprise her when you take the stage at the pep rally.

>>3356039
>[x] Bide your time -- surprise her when you take the stage at the pep rally.
If there were ever any doubts we would win this shit, remove them now

>>3356039
>Free lunch for all students... fire any teacher who assigns more than three hours' worth of homework in a single week... all vending machines required to carry morning-after pills? A marijuana dispensary on campus? An official resolution signed by North High recognizing Palestine as the only legitimate government in Gaza?
>You have to make wild demands at the start, so when you meet the other side in the middle, it's closer to what you want! That's the art of the deal!
>She's got a five year plan, and is shooting for a cultural festival
She needs to win. Rose will get her punishment for being an autocratic shill later. For now, let's figure how how we're going to knock her (strap-on) dick into the dirt.
>[x] Bide your time -- surprise her when you take the stage at the pep rally.

>>3356063
>[ ] Auburn Brantly
>[x] Amber Catachresis

>>3356039
[X] Bide your time -- surprise her when you take the stage at the pep rally.

>>3356039
>[x] Bide your time -- surprise her when you take the stage at the pep rally.
We have to play smart if we- I mean Amber wants to win

>>3356039
I believe that both Auburn and Amber are about to learn what happens when you introduce Big money and lobbyists, with long standing hatreds and ulterior motives, into the political process.

>>3356039
>[x] Confront her.
I was gonna pick the latter choice, but I saw the part about surprising Rose. With her, there's no such thing as a coincidence.

>>3356092
>>3356087
>>3356083
She still has that tracker on us, we fucking can't surprise her

>>3356039
Not suprised, you could see it coming with the OP picture and title

>[X] Bide your time -- surprise her when you take the stage at the pep rally.

>>3356097

Surely we disabled it once our lives stopped being in immediate danger.

>>3356097
Yep. Could've ditched it, but we didn't.

>>3356039
>[X] Confront her.
There is a 0% chance Rose doesn't know we're involved. Remember, this is the girl who put a tracking device in our phone!

>>3356097
Just cause he has the tracker doesn't mean she knows where we are instantly, she has to actively check it.

I feel like her only being here just to try and one up us is much more likely

>>3356039
>[ ] Bide your time -- surprise her when you take the stage at the pep rally.
This will be the stage of what might be the most glorious bout between these two.

So what's on the menu tonight, /fq/? I've got 5 dungeons to design for my party before we get to the main attraction of this arc of the campaign. The Tomb of Catachresis

>>3356185
I'm waiting with bated breath for the words "please wait warmly" so I can take a shower and set up the laundry.
Please OP.

>>3356039
>[X] Bide your time -- surprise her when you take the stage at the pep rally.

>>3356185
What's the challenge rating?

If it's high enough, there damn well better be some gelatinous cubes in one of those dungeons. Don't disappoint your adventurers with easy fluffy shit!

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>[X] Bide your time -- surprise her when you take the stage at the pep rally.

You enter the auditorium a little bit late, after things have already begun and the lights are low. You stand near the back, along the walls, and watch. Auburn is on stage, his cronies sitting in metal folding chairs to his right; and on his left, in a position of honor, is Rose.

"Homecoming is fast approaching, as you know," Auburn says. He takes a handkerchief and wipes his sweating forehead. "Which means there's a lot to do! ... The Sadie Hawkins dance is next week... girls, this is your chance to take the reins..."

You whisper to Amber, who's standing beside you. "Did you know about this? Did you know Rose was going to be here?"

"Of course." She's wearing a smug grin -- Amber is a girl who delights in keeping you off-balance, same as ever.

"What is she doing here?" You demand.

"Same thing you are... only for the wrong side. You wanna beat her, right? Well -- stick to the plan."

"Our boys' and girls' soccer team will be playing an exhibition match against one another this afternoon," Auburn says. "You can pay however much you like for tickets. Proceeds will go to the student org fund...

A boy sidles up to Amber on the other side. He's eating a deluxe-sized slice of pizza, although despite his wolfish hunger, he's thin as a rail. "I put those posters up like you asked," he says as he munches. "Plastered 'em right over Raisin Brant's. We'll beat his ass for sure."

"You are...?" You say.

He notices you for the first time. "Oh!" He says, to Amber. "You actually got the billionaire to help you. Fuckin' wild." He moves as if to extend a hand to shake, but realizes it's the hand holding his pizza; for a moment or two he seems confused, before he realizes that yes, he's got two hands, and he extends the other now instead. You shake with him.

"Will," he says. "I'm Amber's friend."

"Don't lie to the man," Amber says.

"I don't even know why I'm helping you," Will grumbles. "You are such an ass munch."

"He's not a friend. More like a hanger-on," Amber explains to you. "Been kind of following me around like a cloud since middle school. Hey, aren't you supposed to be warming up for that exhibition match?"

"Pffthaha," Will says. "The girls' team won't be any problem. If I can't beat a girl, I'm in trouble."

Amber shakes her head and rolls her eyes.

>>3356228
>She has a Whitney
Oh fuck oh god he fingers her in the locker room next year, doesn't he?

>>3356228
>She has a rule 63'd Whitney

I don't like it.

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>>3356228

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You marvel at the two of them. It's beginning to dawn on you, slowly, that whatever history this girl has, it runs deep; her cover as Amber Catachresis is more than just an assumed identity. She has friends and enemies, an entire life all her own; there is a real history to it, a timeline stretching back years. Amber is an individual in her own right somehow and in some way separate from Camelia. But how separate? And how is that possible?

No time to wonder, because Rose is taking the podium now.

"Thank you, Auburn. And thank you, North High, for having me. It's always such a joy to be back. Some of you old-timers in the class of 2020 might remember me from my time as president of the student council back in the day. Well, I'm here to show my support for the school I love -- by throwing my support behind the best candidate for the job -- the only candidate -- Auburn Brantly. For the past three years and counting, Auburn has continued my legacy, and built upon it in so many wonderful ways..."

She drones on for about 15 stultifying minutes. There's a lot to be said about Rose's time in StuCo, so many different things to despise about it -- it was like a finely aged hatred-wine with a full bouquet of flavors, little undertones and subtle notes that only a true connoisseur of hating Rose could ever truly appreciate. And of the many things you do not miss at all about her governing style, the thing you don't miss the most is her tendency to talk, and talk, and talk, and talk -- for seeming eons.

But of course, you know, there's a perverse strategy in this. She must know that Auburn's opponent gets to take the stage and announce after she's done speaking. If Rose turns the audience off before that happens, gets them bored to tears, they won't be paying attention; and Amber won't leave a mark on them. Snuffing out the competition by faux filibuster. She tried to do it to you, back when you ran. And just like back then, you're going to make sure it fails.

"Let me introduce you," you tell Amber. "I'll get them warmed up for you."

>>3356228
Can't wait to see her Stackleford

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>>3356039

>Free lunch for all students... fire any teacher who assigns more than three hours' worth of homework in a single week...

See boys, told ya she was running on a commie platform.

>A five-year plan to repair the potholes in the parking lot

You lost me at Five-year plan You Rasin flavored commie shitbag. By god this whole establishment needs to burn to the ground.

Kinda like the school did

>[X]Bide Your time

If we even try and tell her an actual working plan, she'll instantly try and fuck it all up for even daring to try to bring some order to her chaos.

We'll have to be subtle about it anons.

>>3356225
>>3356225
It's a level 6 party, Anonymous-dono. Gelatinous Cubes are already easy fluffy shit! (And they've already fought one before, so the surprise factor will be lost.)

The first one I'm working on, since they're literally at the entrance, is the hidden basement of a necromancer's former residence. They've just cleared out the top level. First room in the hidden area is a false altar with a single Flameskull. If they don't keep digging, they won't discover how deep the rabbit hole goes (including the failed, berserk lich bashing against the walls of his lab, and the glabrezu trapped in a sealing circle that'll totally grant you a wish, he promises, if you let him out of this whack ass crystal prison)

>>3356244
>so many different things to despise about it -- it was like a finely aged hatred-wine with a full bouquet of flavors, little undertones and subtle notes that only a true connoisseur of hating Rose could ever truly appreciate.
I have no platform and I must win.

>>3356244
>"Let me introduce you," you tell Amber. "I'll get them warmed up for you."
Ohhh_man.jpg

>>3356228

>She has a Whitney.

>It's male.

And just like that you've lost my interest, retardation is only cute when you have a pair of tits to go along with it.

>>3356244
>>3356253
There is only one way to win. Fuck Rose1 into quitting. And bad mouth our opponent.

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You take the stage.

It's a delicious moment, one you'll keep preserved in your memory banks forever: strolling down the aisle between the bleachers, up to the podium, right past where Rose sits. Her shocked eyes following you the whole way. Her obvious urge to say something, to snap at you -- and her sheer frustration at being unable to. Beautiful. Perfect.

You grab the mic, lean in, and begin. Full throttle, right away:

"Rose Mallory was the worst president in North High's entire history. Her presidency was an absolute disaster." This has the confused student body perking up and paying attention now. "I should know. I ran against her, once -- and I won. My name is Alabaster Soliloquy, and if you're tired of everything Rose and her little toady Auburn Brantly -- or as I like to call him, Raisin Brant -- represent, then vote for something else. Vote for my candidate. The real only candidate. Amber Catachresis."

Auburn, fittingly, is going red in the face; and Rose is even worse. She's bug-eyed, edges of her mouth twitching, physically restraining herself from charging you, it seems. Her balled-up fists in her lap clutch and unclutch the hem of her skirt, the knuckles going white. You smile at her.

"Amber is the girl with the master plan," you say. "She's the girl that's gonna rock this rotten administration to the core and shake things up. Do you folks actually care about a planning committee for a new pool? A culture festival? Of freaking course you don't." Students are looking at one another, nodding, murmuring their general assent. "Well, that's all you get with Raisin Brant. Bland old Raisin Brant. Don't go with that. Go with something fresh. Amber Catachresis. You remember that name now. Amber. Catachresis. Remember it, because in a couple weeks you're all going to vote for her, and she's gonna kick Raisin Brant's bland little ass."

You've got them laughing and enraptured, now; time to hand it off: "But don't take it from me. Here she is herself -- your next president!"

She takes the podium, grinning with an open mouth, exhilarated, resplendent -- and without hearing one word of her actual policy, they're chanting her name: "Amber! Amber! Amber!"

You grab a metal chair from the wall at the edge of the stage, unfold it, and plop it down right next to Rose while Amber speaks.

"I've still got it," you whisper from the corner of your mouth.

Rose is staring straight ahead as she whispers back: "I'm going to destroy you. I'm going to destroy you completely."

"You're on, cunt."

She smiles -- a pained, forced smile, for the audience.

>>3356244
If Alabaster doesn't do one of those super off script and obnoxious speeches that everybody loved back from the V-day flashback I'll be very disappointed

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>>3356270

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>>3356270
By god we're reaching levels of smug that should be humanly impossible, if we get any smuger who knows what will happen!

>>3356228

>those announcements

Is someone harassing him with a remote vibrator too?

>>3356270
And I am officially not disappointed

>>3356270
god i love this shit

>>3356270
AlaBESTer.

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>>3356270

>>3356293
Oh please anon, this is Rasin Brant we're talking about here.

As if he has room to fit a vibe in his ass with Rose's hand lodged so far up there.

>>3356270
Fucking SPECTACULAR

>>3356247
The Glabrezu is a nice touch, but maybe kick it up a notch with a few Alhoons lurking in the depths here and there (possibly explaining why that failed attempt at lichdom is mindlessly destroying its own lab?)

>>3356270
I cannot wait for the hate sex it's going to be so hot

>>3356270
I hope this is payback for trivia night

>>3356314
Negative sir. That's what the rapings were for.

>>3356270
God, that's satisfying. Don't fuck this up, Amber.

>>3356318
She's gonna fuck it up. She's gonna fuck it up hard. And she's gonna win.

>>3356317
Acceptable i suppose

>>3356270
>>3356312
Have a threesome with Rose2 just to piss her off even more.

Alabaster is acting in the interest of the student body, and Rose WILL pay for it all.

>>3356311
>A couple Alhoons
>A COUPLE CR 10 undead Illithid that could Disintegrate any of my party members instantly.

Th-that's uh, a little too brutal for my taste, Anonymous-dono. Especially for what was meant to be a silly little sidequest.

>>3355692
hey, i did it, it's so fucking worth it

>>3356317
But that doesn't sting nearly as much as winning this will. This is finally Alabaster's chance to redeem himself for the bar trivia night and being carried by Kay instead of doing ABSOLUTELY NOTHING just to show how "cool" the waifus are

>>3356327
I mean, I thought I was being nice and *nod* suggesting a larvae Beholder, but.... okaaaaaaaay

>>3356334
If I actually used an Alhoon, I'd have to roleplay it appropriately with its 19 INT. Not only would such a creature have no reason to be lurking in the basement of a failed, berserk lich for hundreds of years (they can planeshift once a day, after all), but even one of those would be an instant TPK for my part between the Mind Blast and the Disintegrate. Larval Beholder, on the other hand, I can at least pick and choose which eye rays it's developed I already have on statted out and ready to roll for one of the other dungeons, it's gonna be neato

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>>3356307

>>3356346
See, the whole point of throwing the insane mind-bending evil shit at people is to see if they were paying attention to the notes in the lich's lab that says he hears strange whispers invading his mind in his dreams, compelling him to begin the path to lichdom, but in case such a path is ever taken, the magical McGuffin ritual spell that purifies all undead in the complex can be triggered as a last resort, and its a puzzle boss.

You'd have to actually be lvl 10s with a good magical defense to actually go toe-to-toe with such an abomination. Make them think!

>>3356365
But see, I'm saving that for the Emperor's Tomb, which is a full on deathtrap in the vein of the Tomb of Horrors with a mad Mummy Lord and his fallen kin waiting at the end with literally Catachresis stuck in his eye in order to exploit all of the party's weaknesses, should they survive the gauntlet that involves getting to him. On top of having to hunt down the keys to the pyramid scattered around a massive necropolis buried in the sands in the first place.

Also the the only character in my party with an INT above 11 is the Wizard, and he easily has the lowest INT in real life. It's... amusing. From a distance.

>>3356329
And welcome aboard this magical, fuck-fueled journey newfriend, if you are new that is. Ee're glad to have you.

>>3356365
>>3356370
*Ahem*

NEEEEEEEEEEEEEERDS

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>>3356375

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When you return to work to close out the day, Whitney reads the news to you -- or at least, a translation. "These Japanese tabloids are vicious. Get a load of this: Makoto Kikuchi spotted at Darkbloom 'orgy house.' The singer-slash-actress has been seen coming and going from the home of Darkbloom Analytics CEO Whitney Darkbloom. Kikuchi, who is studying Darkbloom in preparation for an upcoming film, is now a fixture at the home where libertine activities are alleged to take place on a round-the-clock basis."

"Where's the lie?" You ask.

"I dunno. What does libertine mean?"

"Horny."

"Okay, so no lie. But still. They're gonna wreck her career like this."

You shrug. "Where is she, anyway? Isn't this her usual observation time with you?"

"Fucked if I know. I think she's hanging out with Rose2."

She scrolls a little bit through her feed, reading in silence. Growing suddenly enraged, though, she booms: "What the fuck! Listen to this: Musk founds new company. ... Called the Lightflower Company, the fledgling tech firm launches with the mission of 'creating an antidote to Sand Reckoner.' ... he's stealing our shit, Alabaster!"

"We've got competitors. That's business."

"Fuck that! I'm gonna sue him. I'm gonna take all his fucking money. Asshole! Lightflower? I can sue him for that, right?"

"I don't -- I don't fucking know. Maybe?"

She fumes. Now isn't a good time to poke her.

Instead, you try to think of a strategy for confronting the arduous StuCo campaign ahead. You don't have a lot of time, and you've got a lot of hurdles to overcome.

>Yes or no to all of these:
[ ] Y/N You need technological subterfuge -- hacking.
[ ] Y/N You need to speak with Rose directly and try to understand her strategy.
[ ] Y/N You need to prepare Amber for the upcoming debate with her opponent.

And for now:
[ ] Find another girl (or Alex) to blow off some steam (name your choice).

>>3356372
i caught up around S3E3 but thanks, i've been posting/trolling/bashing Rose2 here and there

>>3356378
[Y] Y/N You need technological subterfuge -- hacking.
[N] Y/N You need to speak with Rose directly and try to understand her strategy.
[Y] Y/N You need to prepare Amber for the upcoming debate with her opponent.

[X] Find Rose2 to have a lewd scene so I can finally shower and start my laundry.

>>3356378
>[Y ] Y/N You need technological subterfuge -- hacking.
>[Y ] Y/N You need to speak with Rose directly and try to understand her strategy.
>[ Y] Y/N You need to prepare Amber for the upcoming debate with her opponent.

And,
>Rose 2

I don't care for her, but she's new.

>>3356370
I don't normally say such things but.... oof. It's always somewhat amusing when a born barbarian gets the bright idea "Hey, I could do magic stuffs too!", at least from a meta-perspective, but Wizards need to come with a built-in "Don't try this at home kids" warning.

That said, it's also always fun seeing vets RP beyond the confines of their less flexible templates. Watching a -Charisma fighter succeed to negotiate his way out of a fight that he was *absolutely* going to die in was pure comedy gold for me.

>>3356375
It's okay dude. If you ask nicely, I'm sure you'll be welcome at the next session.

>>3356378
Yes, No, Yes, Rose 2

>>3356378
>[Y] You need technological subterfuge -- hacking.
>[N] You need to speak with Rose directly and try to understand her strategy.
>[Y] You need to prepare Amber for the upcoming debate with her opponent.

>[ ] Find another girl to blow off some steam (Gal).

Get her for the hacking, too: two birds with one stone.

>>3356378
>[ ] Y/N You need technological subterfuge -- hacking.

We need to recruit Gal before Rose can turn her against us.

>>3356378
[N] Y/N You need technological subterfuge -- hacking.
[Y] Y/N You need to speak with Rose directly and try to understand her strategy.
[Y] Y/N You need to prepare Amber for the upcoming debate with her opponent.

[X] Find Rose2 to have a lewd scene

>>3356378
>>>Yes or no to all of these:
>[Y ] Y/N You need technological subterfuge -- hacking.
>[N ] Y/N You need to speak with Rose directly and try to understand her strategy.
>[Y ] Y/N You need to prepare Amber for the upcoming debate with her opponent.
>
>And for now:
>[Gal] Find another girl (or Alex) to blow off some steam (name your choice).

>>3356378
[Y ] Y/N You need technological subterfuge -- hacking.
[Y ] Y/N You need to speak with Rose directly and try to understand her strategy.
[Y ] Y/N You need to prepare Amber for the upcoming debate with her opponent.

And for now:
Gal can help us with hacking and relieving our desire to rawdog and come inside

>>3356378
>[Y] Y/N You need technological subterfuge -- hacking.
>[N] Y/N You need to speak with Rose directly and try to understand her strategy.
>[Y] Y/N You need to prepare Amber for the upcoming debate with her opponent.

>Rose2

>>3356378
Is Scarlet Catachresis an allowable choice for girl?

Oh my god, this could be a threesome with Rose2 and Makoto

>>3356378
>[Y] You need technological subterfuge -- hacking.
We need info, and we have the single best hacker on the planet in our pocket.
>[N] You need to speak with Rose directly and try to understand her strategy.
Her strategy is our strategy. Any attempt to dig into her is sure to backfire.
>[Y] You need to prepare Amber for the upcoming debate with her opponent.
I want more Amber.

>[x] Find Galatea to blow off some steam

I agree with the two birds in one stone idea.

>>3356378
>[Y] Y/N You need technological subterfuge -- hacking.
>[N] Y/N You need to speak with Rose directly and try to understand her strategy.
[Y] Y/N You need to prepare Amber for the upcoming debate with her opponent.

>[x] Find another girl (or Alex) to blow off some steam.
>[x] Gal

>>3356378
>[Y] Y/N You need technological subterfuge -- hacking.
>[N] Y/N You need to speak with Rose directly and try to understand her strategy.
>[Y] Y/N You need to prepare Amber for the upcoming debate with her opponent.

>[X] Rose2

>>3356404
If she is, God, I would. Switch in a moment's notice.

>>3356393
Rose already has Alex working for her, I'm sure.

>>3356378
>[Y] Y/N You need technological subterfuge -- hacking
I mean, I'm about 99% certain Best Boi could get into Musk's network and get us some dirt.
.
>[N] Y/N You need to speak with Rose directly and try to understand her strategy.
After the stunt we pulled, she's actively going to try to destroy us with maximum prejudice.

>[Y] Y/N You need to prepare Amber for the upcoming debate with her opponent.
This is just an obvious thing.

>[X] Find another girl (or Alex) to blow off some steam (name your choice).
We should spend a bit more time with mom.

And by 'spend more time with' I actually mean 'try to continue the Soliloquy bloodline, by force'.

>>3356378

>[Y]Hacking

We have the tools, why not use them?

>[Y] Speak to Rose

I know she won't let anything slip, I honestly just want to fuck with her head. The more we rile her up, the more likely she is to screw during the race.

Also the hotter the hate-sex after all this going to be

>[Y] Prepare Amber

I doubt we can change her course anyhow, but we should at least see which why this flaming train-wreck of ours is driving before we continue.

>[x] Kay

I know this won't win, but I feel like fucking the black horse in this race.

Watch OP somehow incorporate an actual black horse, or in this case, a black dog

>>3356378
I'll Y/N the others later but all I care about is

[x] Rose2 (and possibly Makato)

>>3356426
>I'll Y/N the others later
To quote best girl, tick tock, you dumb asshole. You know how this works.

>>3356378
>[x] Rose2
Let's give ALL of the Catacheresis family some live guys

>>3356378

Kimochi's idol career is probably ruined, but luckily she's already found a new dream to pursue.

>[Y] Y/N You need technological subterfuge -- hacking.
>[Y] Y/N You need to speak with Rose directly and try to understand her strategy.
>[Y] Y/N You need to prepare Amber for the upcoming debate with her opponent.

>[ ] Galatea

Please wait warmly.

>>3356378
>[x] Y/N You need technological subterfuge -- hacking.
For Musk, [N]. For Rose and Student Council [Y].
>[N] Y/N You need to speak with Rose directly and try to understand her strategy.
Art of War. Absolutely not.
>[Y] Y/N You need to prepare Amber for the upcoming debate with her opponent.

>[ ] Find another girl (or Alex) to blow off some steam (name your choice).
Alex is a female (male) and we are NOT GAY, but we should pump Rose ("gently," lovingly (roughly)) for information.

File: 1552027068264.png (1.43 MB, 1280x720)

1.43 MB PNG

>>3356437

>>3356437
THANK YOU SO MUCH
I'M FREE
I'M FINALLY FREE

>>3356378
Yes, No, Yes

>>3356430
I'm fucking busy and care more about voting for who we spend time with asshole

>>3356437
I'll be very warm

File: in this moment, i am euphoric.png (1.03 MB, 860x1080)

1.03 MB PNG

>>3356442
Masterpiece

>>3356445
I was trying to give you a playful ribbing in best-girl flavor to encourage you to not miss the vote, but go ahead and be offended instead. By the way, you missed the vote.

>>3356452
I can't take credit for it, but I'll ensure it lives on.

Pretty sure we're gettting Galatea, that's what most of the votes were for, but i'm not sure about the Y/Ns

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17 KB JPG

>>3356455
>By the way, you missed the vote.

>>3356456
I thought most of the votes were for Rose2.

>>3356442
kek

>>3356455
? I'm aware anon. What can't take someone calling you an asshole back? Have you been on /a/?

>>3356478
you thought wrong

>>3356456
>>3356500
She won by 1 vote

Maybe OP will make Gal appear out of nowhere so we can also fuck her too but Rose2 won

>>3356500
The fuck you on about? Rose2 fucking won get over it we can fuck Gal another time

>>3356507
>Maybe OP will make Gal appear out of nowhere so we can also fuck her too
That'd literally make 0 sense for the character that's reaching asspull levels of stupid

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14 KB JPG

>>3355519
>and there's black people in my family tree

>>3356507
ah, guess i miscounted
not too broken up though since we'll cross both galatea and cerise off the list in the same pastebin

>>3356521
Man, the Rose2fags are super aggressive tonight. Careful not to feed them after midnight.

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51 KB JPG

>>3356529
A bit eager over there huh anon?

>>3356538
I know right?
>>3356540
yeah? i mean i honestly miscounted because i thought some of the Rose2 votes were Rose votes, because at least that would make sense, unlike Rose2 votes.

>>3356538
Hey you try being all happy when you just recounted like 7 times to make sure you weren't going insane

I stand by what I said though, it would be stupid if Gal was involved in this lewd. I've been waiting for Rose2 and Makoto for a long time and adding another girl to that would overflow the scene

>>3356529

While I like their dynamic, I think that Galatea would benefit from some more solo scenes, personally. If we only interact with her in the context of her being attached to Cerise at the hip it feels like our relationship won't improve.

>>3356549
I'm just trying to figure out why you bothered counting, least of all 7 times. Have faith in OP.

>>3356546
>yeah? i mean i honestly miscounted because i thought some of the Rose2 votes were Rose votes, because at least that would make sense, unlike Rose2 votes.
I was talking about the Cerise x Gal pastebin anon...

>>3355952
>Since when did genocidal ideologies get so cool and hip with the kids nowadays?
Since before most religions.

>>3356550
Agreed if she's only used in groupsex she'll end up as being more like a toy instead of character/Lover

>>3356550
not attached at the hip, attached at the mouth

but i did vote for Gal getting her scene so i'm not clearly not opposed to more solo time.

Although i'm also not opposed to her primarily being here for Cerise, after all, she's super in love with Cerise, Alabaster just needs a crack at that Neet pussy

>>3356551
7 times was obviously and exaggeration and I counted because that other anon insisted that Gal won even though I was pretty sure she didn't

>Have faith in OP
What are you referring to with that? Are implying you want Gal in the scene or?

>>3356581
>What are you referring to with that?
I'm saying you should have faith in OP. He always delivers.

>>3356581
>>Have faith in OP
>What are you referring to with that? Are implying you want Gal in the scene or?
That's very fucking obviously him saying that you can trust OP to get the votes correct, and that my miscount wouldn't mess up the results

>>3356581
Because honestly, the only count that matters is what OP counts. Just let the fire smoulder and get ready for the napalm to drop.

File: waiting warmly.gif (1.27 MB, 500x691)

1.27 MB GIF

I am sufficiently warmed, washed, and laundered, and now I'm listening to Loveless.
Life is good.

>>3356587
Ok thought so just wanted to check as it seems like a really dumb thing to have faith over. I mean every single not horrid QM should be able to count votes, it's like saying to have faith that OP breathes. Kind of silly really

>>3356597
Uh oh, somebody left their bag and drink on a park bench. I hope somebody returns them to the owner!