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You are Alabaster Soliloquy, Sadpanda Spelunker and defiler of idols.

PREVIOUSLY:
-Your long erstwhile mother began work at Darkbloom Analytics as a chef.
-David Darkbloom woke up again, and begged for permission to see his daughters. You took pity on him and said you would allow it.
-Hardass FBI agent Noelle Keki showed how desperate for human contact she really was by admitting that she sometimes watches anime with the rejects who hang out in DA's recreational areas. You offered to give her the benefit of less insufferable company.
-You walked in on Whitney and Vivian in a compromising situation. You joined in, only to be walked in on, too, by Makoto -- who also joined in.
-Mom's patisserie skills remain as great as ever but she's awful at everything else; and, unable to convince her of this, you ended up with a disaster on your hands at lunch.
-At home, you fooled around with Cerise but got rudely sidetracked by another Darkbloom visit. You decided to fulfill your promise and take him to see his daughters.

---


Episode 1 ("New Game!!!"): https://archived.moe/qst/thread/3207742

Episode 2 ("L.A. Blue Girl"): https://archived.moe/qst/thread/3227871

Episode 3 ("Food Wars! Shokugeki no Mama, Part 1"): https://archived.moe/qst/thread/3248193

Episode 4 ("Food Wars! Shokugeki no Mama, Part 2"): https://archived.moe/qst/thread/3268859

Episode 5 ("The Princess of Tennis"): https://archived.moe/qst/thread/3291491

Episode 6 ("Ore no Okaasan ga Konna ni Kawaii Wake ga Nai"): https://archived.moe/qst/thread/3311702

Season 1 Index: https://pastebin.com/u/DirtyCeriseFaggot
Season 2 Index: https://pastebin.com/iDiki7kt
Twitter: https://twitter.com/CeriseSoliloquy
Fan Wiki: https://fquest.miraheze.org
Smut Pastebin: https://pastebin.com/u/CeriseSoliloquy (content not allowed on /qst/ will go here)

---

AND NOW, EPISODE 7 OF FUCK QUEST:
"Girls und Scanner"

Season 3 OP (A): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ncjy-f_wafs
>>
>>3334553
First for kissing Rose2!
>>
>>3334553
First for anniversaries and FUCK daylight savings time!
>>
I can't believe it's been five years.
>>
>>3334553
First for delicious cake(s)!
>>
>>3334555
L-lewd
>>
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October 7, 2011

On their annual sojourn into the desert to hunt quail, David Darkbloom and Vasily Kerimov discussed finances -- as always -- but the "home office," as Vasily always euphemstically calls it, seems to be souring on David's management.

When normal investors lose faith in the CEO, they support an ouster and the CEO is fired. If David's darker sources of income lose faith in him, however, he knows being out of a job is the least concern. To drive that home, near the end of their hunting trip, Vasily ominously remarked that the Cosa Nostra used to use the desert here between Basrstow and Las Vegas as a convenient place to dispose of bodies.

Now, that evening, David is in his study, poring over Darkbloom Enterprises financial reports to assess the scope of the crisis. He does it to himself, and that's what really hurts: sterling performance in quarter 3 utterly demolished by the money-hole that is his secret Penelope project. He is developing new wrinkles on his already careworn face in real-time. And it is just then when he hears a small voice from over by the door, near the fireplace: "Euripedes?"

Darkbloom folds stapled sheets back over themselves and sets the current document aside. He swivels in his chair and smiles at Vivian. "Yes! Eumenides?"

This is Vivian's favorite greeting of late, although David sees her so infrequently that it doesn't get much currency. It's the punchline of a tired old joke about a Greek playwright who rips his trousers and visits the tailor to have them fixed. David taught it to Vivian last year. He himself learned it at age 13 -- and, repeating it to his own father back in those days, got called a faggot for his trouble.

Vivian is holding Johann in front of her face the way she does when she's too anxious to look people in the eye.

"Good evening, Johann," David says. "Have you seen Vivian?"

"I have not," is Vivian's best impression of a refined gentleman.

"Shame. I had some cherry cordials to share with her."

Renee taught him this maneuver. He wouldn't otherwise have guessed that little Vivian is as easily motivated by the promise of sweets as any ordinary little girl. But in fact she is, and now Johann is saying: "Aha! I believe I see her now."

Vivian lowers the stuffed penguin so David can look at her properly.

He waves her closer, and she steps forward into the warm little room. He hauls her up on his lap. From his drawer he produces a little bonbon wrapped in red foil. He hands it to her, and she eagerly unwraps it, and bites into it, and it leaves a little dollop of sticky syrup on her chin. Darkbloom wipes it off with a tissue for her. She grimaces, but lets him.
>>
>>3334570
Don't forget to tweet OP
>>
>>3334570
Vivian is cute. Cute!
>>
"I did not know you kept cordials in your desk," she says.

"My secret hiding spot has been revealed," David says with mock despair. But he is quick to remind her: "I know how many candies are in this drawer. Do not think you can sneak any without permission. Cherry cordials are a sometimes food."

"Yes. The caloric content is too high for the relatively small nutritional value."

He bounces her a little on his his knee. She smiles wanly.

"Can I count on your vote in the upcoming election?" Johann asks.

"You can. I will even contribute towards your campaign."

"Huzzah. Your support is critical to my success."

"What is the voting age in Antarctica?" David asks.

"Ten and a half," Johann replies.

"What a happy coincidence. This means Vivian can vote for you as well."

"Indeed. Her support is also key."

Vivian is quiet for a turn, so David finally says: "There is something on your mind."

"Of course," Vivian says. She fiddles with Johann's fur. "My mind is always occupied with important matters."

"As it should be. But there is no one better to help you work through important matters than your father. What are you trying to work through?"

She stares at the ground. "I am wondering -- if I could come and work at the company."

David laughs in his leonine way. "You are a bit young yet, to worry about your career. When the time is right, you will have your rightful place there. I promise."

"Mm."

"But is that truly what you want for your career? You should set your sights higher than running the family business."

"It is only natural. I want to continue your legacy--"

"I know. But you are capable of greater things." He holds her by either shoulder and squeezes. "The world is yours, Vivian. Maybe one day you will let someone else take the reins of the company -- and instead do something to shape the course of history itself. You could even be a President, like Johann here."

"Mm."

"But this is all so far in the future. In the meantime, you should focus on your education. Are you getting on with your tutors? Still progressing nicely with integrals?"

"The tutors are fine."

"You seem dispirited. Something else troubles you."

"It is just... I never see you, father. If I could come and work at the company..."

He puts his broad, strong palm on the top of her head. "I understand. This is not about your career, after all -- is it."

"I miss you."

"I miss you too, Vivian. You are never far from my mind."

She leans against his body and grips the sides of his coat, tight, in both fists. She inhales the scent of his cologne, his warmth. "I do not wish to be maudlin... I am sorry."

"It is quite all right."

"Father, do you... do you love me?"

David tilts his head and peers down at his daughter, confused. "Why would you think I don't?"

But tears are slowly trickling down her cheeks, so he hugs her tight, and says (one of maybe a dozen or so times he ever directly does) -- "I love you, Vivian."
>>
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>>3334597
an feeling so complicated
>>
You slowly wind your car up a long, twisting driveway until finally you sit parked outside Vivian's new house. It's a hell of a contrast to the gloomy Tudor style of the Darkbloom manor; Vivian selected a home in the modernist style, all smooth white reinforced concrete, spindly columns holding up a boxy second story above a carport, the perimeter dominated by enormous windows. She's only just relocating, and even now a moving crew is busily unloading Vivian's things from two different trucks -- there's just so much of it.

"This is the house Vivian chose?" Darkbloom says. "It's so dreadfully gaudy."

"Yeah," you say sarcastically, peering out your windshield, scanning your eyes across the house's exterior. "I'm sure that's the first thing Vivian wants to hear from the father she's been mourning for more than a year." You turn to face Cerise. "I get it. It's hard to accept that your daughter isn't your creepy little clone anymore. That she's got her own tastes and opinions. Is that it?"

Darkbloom grimaces.

"After you," you tell him.

He steps out and walks up the driveway like someone dazed. You follow close behind.
>>
>>3334570
>>3334597
>"What is the voting age in Antarctica?" David asks.

>"Ten and a half," Johann replies.

>"What a happy coincidence. This means Vivian can vote for you as well."

Fucking RIGGED

this is cute as shit
>>
>>3334619
Seeing that after such a beautiful, heart warming scene before really drives home how much of an asshole Alabaster is, and how much of an asshole I am for making his choices.
Kuyashii.
>>
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>>3334597
Would you vote for him anons?
>>
>>3334597
>>3334619
>"It is only natural. I want to continue your legacy--"

>"I know. But you are capable of greater things."

>It's hard to accept that your daughter isn't your creepy little clone anymore.

Alabaster as dense as ever, I see.
>>
>>3334627
I'm voting for him in 2020.
>>
>>3334619
>You turn to face Cerise. "I get it. It's hard to accept that your daughter isn't your creepy little clone anymore. That she's got her own tastes and opinions. Is that it?"
>Darkbloom grimaces.
>"After you," you tell him.
Absolutely destroyed
>>
>>3334627
Nah, I'm not old enough
>>
>>3334627
That depends, what's Johann's platform concerning the distribution of fish to less fortunate penguins?
>>
Up a short slat staircase, inside the squat, yawningly wide-open tiled living area of the home, you find Vivian, sitting on a couch, filing her nails; and Whitney, turning in circles, directing the movers.

One of the men makes the mistake of asking Vivian directly, about a china hutch: "where do you want this?" -- to which Vivian replies with a distressed, wordless murmur. Whitney intercedes, saying: "Over there is fine. We'll figure it out."

Seeing you and Cerise now, Whitney greets you happily -- oblivious as always, and not noticing that Cerise has bright blue eyes at the moment. Vivian, her attention catching, looks up. She notices it straight off: "Cerise -- are you wearing contact lenses?"

"Vivian..." Darkbloom says. He begins to say something further, but Vivian recoils, rubbing her forehead, wincing.

"I apologize," she says weakly, "I've had this terrific headache come on a few moments ago, and --" she gulps down air.

"What is he doing here?" Whitney demands. She's staring at Cerise with contempt.

"He wanted to see you two. I told him he could on the condition that he keeps himself well-behaved..."

"Thanks for consulting me, assface," Whitney says.

Vivian, still weak, and massaging her temples, says: "He? Have I missed something?"

"Is your bedroom all unpacked yet?" You ask, speaking over Darkbloom, who is -- in what must be a first -- struggling to find words.

"Yes. I suppose you wish to speak in private?"
>>
>>3334647
And it begins
>>
>>3334627
I'm moving to Antarctica just so I can vote for him
>>
>>3334647
NO NO NO NO GET DARKBLOOM OUT OF THERE
>>
>>3334647
Intense worry.
>>
>>3334647
>Vivian is having a headache as soon as Darkbloom steps in
oh no
>>
>>3334644
kek
>>
>>3334570
>>3334597
This is something I was excited for, OP Studios turning David Darkbloom into a human and likeable character.
>>
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Cerise is on the edge of Vivian's four-post bed, hands in her lap; Whitney and Vivian stare down at her. Vivian has not taken the news verywell at all. She is angry and reeling in disbelief: "This... this must surely be a cruel practical joke. Absurd -- utterly specious. To think you could make me believe that father has been transported into the body of someone else." She looks to you, now: "This entire ruse is sick and detestable. Did Whitney put you up to this? And why? I demand an accounting from you all--"

"Euripedes?" Darkbloom says in a small voice. You cock your head in confusion at this. But it instantly defuses Vivian's ranting. She turns slowly towards Cerise, lips atremble. And then her entire body is shivering, as if wracked by a sudden chill.

"...Euripides..." Vivian repeats. She sounds half shellshocked.

"Yes!" Darkbloom replies. "Eumenides?"

There must be hidden significance to this exchange because it seems to have convinced Vivian of the truth, just like that. Tears well up and come running down in big fat drops. She holds the heels of her palms to her cheeks and clutches her face, and actually falls to her knees. Darkbloom is on the ground with her now in an instant, hugging her, as Vivian says: "Father -- father!"

Vivian weeps against Cerise's chest for a minute or two. Big, gasping, inconsolable sobs. Darkbloom gently strokes her hair and tries to soothe her. "I am here," he repeats over and over, "I am here."

But then all at once Vivian is pushing herself away, wriggling herself free. Darkbloom reaches out for her again, but she swats the outstretched hand and refuses his touch.

"Why?" Vivian demands. "Why did you -- why did you...." There are too many whys and not nearly enough time to list them all.

"I did not intend for things to end as they ended," he says. "But everything I did, I did for you."

"Liar!" Vivian barks. "You did it for you. You did it for your insane ego. You did it for your hubris. Do not think you can manipulate me with your self-justifications and revisionism!"

Darkbloom is shamefaced. He has no rebuttal.

"You... you are a monster," Vivian tells him. "And you deserved the death you got."

Darkbloom reacts to this as if he had been physically struck.

She stands, and sniffles back her tears, and backs slowly away. Then, turning on her heels, she's gone. The door slams behind her.

Now it's Darkbloom who's crying. "I don't know what's come over me," he says through the tears. "Usually I am in much better command of my emotional state. I think my mind is overwhelmed by female hormones--"

"Jesus," Whitney breathes. "Vivian did you even dirtier than I was gonna. That was rough."

Darkbloom stares at the ceiling. "Alabaster -- if you will permit it, may I speak with Whitney in private?"

You glance at Whitney. She seems unhappy with this prospect, but she isn't saying no.

[ ] Let them speak in private.
[ ] Refuse.

And:
[ ] Try to get Vivian back in the room.
[ ] Let her go.
>>
>>3334710
>[x] Let them speak in private.

And:
>[x] Try to get Vivian back in the room.
>>
>>3334710
Let them speak / get her back
>>
>>3334710
>"You... you are a monster," Vivian tells him. "And you deserved the death you got."
That's a BIG oof

>[x] Let them speak in private.
>[x] Let her go
>>
>>3334710
[X] Let them speak in private
[X] Try to get Vivian back in the room
>>
>>3334627
>>3334710
>[x] Let them speak in private.

>[x] Try to get Vivian back in the room.
>>
>>3334710
>[X] Let them speak in private
>[X] Try to get Vivian back in the room
I don't really have a problem with her coming to terms with this at her own pace, but we should at least go talk to her.
>>
>>3334710
>[x] Refuse
>[x] Try to get Vivian back in the room
>>
>>3334710
>[X] Let them speak in private.
>[X] Try to get Vivian back in the room.
>>
>>3334710
>[x] Let them speak in private.
>[x] Try to get Vivian back in the room.
Let's go comfort our Loli
>>
>>3334710
>[x] Let them speak in private.
>[x] Try to get Vivian back in the room.
>>
>>3334710
>[x] Let them speak in private.
If it was Vivian, I'd say no fucking way. We can trust Whitney (?), in spite of how much as we've hidden from her.
I mean, after all, who could pull one over on the smartest girl in the world, right? Let's just hope she doesn't have a secret implant.
>[x] Write-in: Go after Vivian/Try to get her back in the room.
>>
>>3334710
>[x Let them speak in private.
>[x] Try to get Vivian back in the room.
>>
>>3334742
That isn't much of a write in anon...

>Let's just hope she doesn't have a secret implant.
That just reminded me that Vivian has an implant now. Mara totally knows that David is back, doesn't she?
>>
>>3334710
>[X] Let them speak in private.
Time to put these cats in the cradle

>[X] Try to get Vivian back in the room.
And time to get this one out
>>
>>3334710
I'm reminded of the "death" of Alfred Nobel by this. The veil's been completely ripped away from Darkbloom's eyes at this point. Could atonement truly be attainable?
>>
>>3334710

>[ ] Let them speak in private.
>[ ] Try to get Vivian back in the room.

I want to overwhelm Darkbloom's mind with maternal hormones!
>>
>>3334761
I guess it's self-explanatory if we're leaving them alone, but I'd rather go after Vivian under the auspices of talking to her about the whole thing in general, rather than going after her to convince her to talk to Darkbloom again. Even though I'm sure that in either case we're going to talk to her about how she feels about it. I'm nitpicking, I guess, and I'm sure OP has something specific in mind.
>>
>>3334710
>Let them speak in private.

>Try to get Vivian back in the room.
>>
>>3334710
>[x] Let them speak in private.
and
>[x] Try to get Vivian back in the room.
>>
>[X] Let them speak in private.
>[X] Try to get Vivian back in the room.

"Remove that person from my home, please," Vivian says when you return to the living room.

"I will. He wanted to talk to Whitney for a little bit, but we'll go back home after that."

"Is Ms. Carte aware of this? She must be made aware -- she will remedy the situation --"

"She's working on it. He'll be gone for good soon enough."

"Splendid news."

She sounds anything but happy.

"Are you going to be okay with that?" You ask Vivian. "I mean -- if what you just said to him, is the last thing you ever say to him?"

Vivian is trying to appear aloof, but you know she's struggling with a horrible inner conflict. "You helped kill him. Why should you take any greater measure of pity on him than I do?"

"He's not my dad," you say. "Unless some other big plot twist is in the works." You massage the bridge of your nose. How to make her understand? She's setting herself up for a regret you know all too well. "Vivian -- I'm not doing this for his sake. I know you miss him. Don't spend the rest of your life wishing you said something else to him the last time you got the chance to speak. Because who knows if you'll ever see him again."

"What else is there to say?" She asks.

"I don't know. 'I love you, dad'? Or however you two weirdos expressed affection. I'm not well versed on the father-daughter bonding of robots."

She frowns, but you seem to have moved her enough to stomach seeing him again, if only one more time.
>>
>>3334925
>"He's not my dad," you say. "Unless some other big plot twist is in the works."
Hmmmmmm. HMMMMMM.
>>
>>3334925
>"He's not my dad," you say. "Unless some other big plot twist is in the works."
I'm onto your games, OP
>>
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>>3334925
>"I mean -- if what you just said to him, is the last thing you ever say to him?"
>>
>>3334925
Aw man, trying to help her not make the mistakes of our past. It feels feely
>>
>>3334925
>"He's not my dad," you say. "Unless some other big plot twist is in the works."
Foreshadowing
>>
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A few minutes later, when Vivian is composed, and the murmuring from within her bedroom is done, Vivian's first words to Darkbloom are not affection, but interrogation:

"Why did you leave me nothing? Why did you hand everything to Whitney?"

"I... thank you, Vivian, for returning. I want you to know that I understand --"

"Answer me."

Darkbloom sighs. "It is as I told you time and again. Running the company is not your destiny. You are meant for even greater things. I had a vision -- of the future -- that I built up for so very long... Whitney running the company without any trouble, and you, ascending to the Presidency... together you could have built an immortal legacy for this family..."

"Guess I'm a real disappointment, huh?" Whitney says.

"You do not disappoint me," Darkbloom tells her. "Quite the contrary. Under the circumstances, it is a miracle you have kept yourself and the people you care about alive. You were the right person to give control of the company to."

Whitney's expression is still contemptuous, but a little surprised at this -- and maybe a little proud over the praise.

"I meant every word of what I said earlier," Vivian tells Darkbloom. "And this just brings the truth of it to bear. Whitney and I were two pieces on the chessboard for you. The same as everyone else."

"You were," he admits. "But you were the most important ones. I was lucky to have had two queens... oh, but nevermind. I have learned... just recently... the folly of planning. And now I am merely a ghost passing through. I will trouble you for not much longer. If you ever wish to consult me, I... but I suppose you never needed that either. You will want to be through with me completely, and that is fine. Just know my heart was only ever full of love for you. You must believe this, please -- if nothing else at all."

"I hate you," Vivian says. "Rationally I should. But... when I assess it with the fullness of my memories and emotions, the vestige of filial affection is there too."

"I, uh," Whitney says. "Is that your way of saying 'I love you'?"

"I still love you, father."

Vivian hugs Darkbloom. Darkbloom hugs her back. The hug has a heaviness to it, though. There is something broken there that cannot be repaired. And when Vivian pulls away, Cerise's eyes are normal again.
>>
>>3334958
>I was lucky to have had two queens

And now with Alabaster, Alex, and Tyrus, he's got FIVE HEYOOOOOOO
>>
>>3334958

Smile protected, probably!
>>
>>3334958
This is an acceptable outcome
>>
>>3334958
E-everything will be daijoubu, guys.
>>
>>3334958
>"You do not disappoint me," Darkbloom tells her.
Good.

>The hug has a heaviness to it, though. There is something broken there that cannot be repaired. And when Vivian pulls away, Cerise's eyes are normal again.
Good?
>>
>>3334958
>using pictures from THAT scene
That's a low blow, OP
>>
>>3334958
>Vivian hugs Darkbloom. Darkbloom hugs her back. The hug has a heaviness to it, though. There is something broken there that cannot be repaired. And when Vivian pulls away, Cerise's eyes are normal again.
That's way to suspicious to be coincidence. That's definitely a hint for what causes the personality switch
>>
>>3334958
For the record, the first Presidential Election Vivian would legally be allowed to run for is in 2036. Spooky.
>>
"What did he want?" you ask Whitney on the drive home.

"Couple things. He didn't think Vivian was coming back so he gave me this list of offshore companies he had with a bunch of money in them. Shell corporations, he called them... bunch of wild fuckin' names like Zebra Brain Interactive, Vermont Coma Genetics, Gyroscope Mandala LTD... basically, places to keep some extra cash where the big bad gubmint couldn't tax it."

"How much are they worth?"

"Dunno. Few billion? They weren't in the will and he figures they should go to her. I left the list written down for her."

"How nice of him," you say, drumming your thumbs on the steering wheel. "Not that Vivian needs any extra billions."

"Well fuck, I don't either," Whitney says. "Let the kid have 'em."

"What else did he want?"

Whitney hums. "Uhhh... I agree with the dumb asshole for once. It's probably best not to say the other thing. Knowing how you'd react."

"Fucking seriously?" You say. "You're going to let Darkbloom manipulate you into keeping secrets from me. Is that it?"

"See?" Whitney insists. "Like that!"

"She's kinda got a point," Cerise says from the backseat. "You have a habit of flying off the rails."

"I don't fly off the fucking rails! Fuck you!"

"Ally, if there's anyone who doesn't want to fall for Daddy Darkbloom's bullshit, it's me. I'm, like, hyper vigilante about that."

"Vigilant," you correct.

"Whatever, grammar Nazi--"

"That's not a grammatical mistake. That's a vocab mistake."

"Oh my GOD, Ally. Shut up. Listen. It's nothing you need to worry about right now, so don't. I'll handle it."

[ ] Drop it.
[ ] Demand to know.
>>
>>3335071
>[x] Drop it.
>>
>>3335071
>[x] Drop it.
I trust Whitney.
>>
>>3335071
[X] Drop it
Alabaster is way too hyper autistic and paranoid to deal with whatever it is.
>>
>>3335071
>[X] Drop it.
Trust in the Smartest Girl in the Universe!
>>
>>3335071
>[x] Demand to know.
This is bait.
>>
>>3335071
>[x] Drop it.
>>
>>3335071
>[x] Drop it.
>>
>>3335071

>[ ] Drop it.

Don't be tempted guys, whenever he gives us a "drop it" the other choice is a deathtrap.
>>
>>3335071
I guess he really is our dad
>>
>>3335071
>[x] Drop it.
>>
>>3335071
>[X] Drop it.
Whitney is smart enough to tell someone else about it if she can't handle it herself, we don't need to be in charge of everything
>>
>>3335071
>[ ] Drop it.
When has Whitney ever done us wrong before.
>>
>>3335071
>[ ] Demand to know.
It's important for us to know. We trusted her enough to tell her even though she's known to go off of the rails, so it's only fair

Trust goes both ways
>>
>>3335071
>[X] Drop it.
We love and respect Whitney and we need to show her more trust than this. If even she is agreeing with Darkbloom about not telling us, then we probably should let it be for now.
>>
>>3335071
(x) I trust you
>>
>>3335122
>Write-in: Say "I trust you."
>>
I'm going to go ahead and say to answer my vote >>3335117

With this >>3335122
>>
>>3335122
>>3335129

I'm okay with this.
>>
>>3335122
>(x) I trust you
I do. I really do.
>>
>>3335122
Since >[ ] Demand to know isn't close to winning, I might as well switch to this
>>
>>3335071
>Write-in: Say "I trust you."

Gotta help Alabastor grow up, one tiny little choice at a time.
>>
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>[x] Drop it.

"Okay," you say, calming yourself. "I trust you."

"You-- what?" Whitney says. She seemed keyed up for a fight already.

"You hear me. I'm trying to learn how to be more trusting."

Cerise clutches the headrests of both front seats and leans in between them: "Who are you and what have you done with Alabaster?"

"Ha ha," you grouse. "Don't act surprised. There's enough on my plate already so I sure as hell don't want to deal with any more of Darkbloom's bullshit if I don't have to. If you're telling me I don't, I'll believe you."

"Fuckin' A," Whitney says, smiling.

---

(Time for something else.)

[ ] Bar trivia.
[ ] A visit with the Catachresis family.
[ ] A date with Whitney.
[ ] Anime with Noelle.
>>
>>3335160
FUCK
ALL OF THESE LOOK FANTASTIC
GOD DAMMIT
FUCK
AGH
I have to go with my girl though
[X] A visit with the Catachresis family
>>
>>3335160
>[x] Anime with Noelle.
>>
>>3335160
>[X] Bar trivia.
>>
>>3335160
>[X] Anime with Noelle.
Let's get this trainwreck on the tracks.
>>
>>3335160
>[X] Anime with Noelle.
DAMN YOU OP. DAMN YOU FOR MAKING THEM ALL GOOD.
>>
>>3335160

>anime with Noelle.
>>
>>3335160
These are fucking hard choices.
>[x] Anime with Noelle.
>>
>>3335160
>[ ] Anime with Noelle.
>>
>>3335160
>[x] A visit with the Catachresis family.

>[x] Anime with Noelle.
I will choose both and you will be satisfied.
>>
>>3335160
>[x] A visit with the Catachresis family.
Literally one of my favorite parts of this season
>>
>>3335160
Oh come on. You're actually gonna make me CHOOSE?

You're a cruel, cruel man, OP.

>[x] Bar trivia.
>>
>>3335160
>[X] Anime with Noelle

Time for some good ol' classic /a/utism
>>
>>3335160
>[x] Anime with Noelle

Renee still a best, but she's had a good amount of screentime lately and bar trivia is inevitably gonna happen regardless
>>
>>3335160
>[x] Bar trivia.
It's fucking TIME
>>
>>3335160
[X] A visit with the Catachresis family.

>All these discount-Rennefags
>>
>>3335160
>A date with Whitney.
>>
>>3335160
>[x] Anime with Noelle
How can we not? Although bar trivia is a close second.
>>
>>3335160

You know what? I was just talking to someone about going to bar trivia again next week, and that still can't convince me

>[X] Anime with Noelle
>>
>>3335160
Hardest decision ever, my inner whitney fag wants the date, my inner carte fag wants the bar trivia, and my gut instinct tells me I will be a noelle fag and I want progress.

>[x] Noelle
With another vote for midweek interlewd with whitney date
>>
>>3335160
>[x] Anime with Noelle.
Time to work towards that 12/12.
>>
>>3335160

>[ ] Anime with Noelle.

You're gonna have people conspiring for four-way ties at this rate OP.
>>
Please wait warmly!
>>
>>3335221
Shhh. There's no secret Fuck Quest Illuminati manipulating votes behind the scenes. Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain.
>>
>>3335225
Imagine.
>>
>>3335228
With anime club? I'd rather not.
>>
>>3335225
Hype
>>
>>3335225

oh boy oh boy oh boy oh boy oh boy oh boy
>>
>>3335225
My warmth is ever-expanding.
>>
>>3335232
We said it was going to be just the two of us. This has long been established.
>>
>>3335225
>>
>>3335240
Whoops. My mistake. I'm all for it, then.
>>
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>>3335225
YESSSSS
>>
It's the day of the anniversary guys. In just a couple more hours, FQ turns 5 years old
>>
It's 3/10
>>
Happy (close enough) birthday, Fuck Quest!
>>
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>>3335225
>we're finally getting a Noelle scene
>>
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>>3335227

It sure is weird that I originally typed FQlluminati but inexplicably decided to change it.
>>
>>3335251
Buying a gallon of green paint to celebrate
>>
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>>3335251
>>3335253

Man, what a wild road it's been
>>
>>3335240
Just you wait for Stackleford to walk in and fuck Noelle right in front of us
>>
>>3335268
It serves only as a reminder that one day this quest is going to end, and I'll be left with a hole in my heart not even Alabaster could fill.

Why OP, why must you be so based.
>>
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>>3335308
>It serves only as a reminder that one day this quest is going to end
S-stop it
>>
>>3335308
>>3335320
>Fuck Quest will end in our lifetimes
>For real this time
>And forever

It's a super abstract kind of feel.
>>
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>>3335308
>>
>>3335330
Not in our hearts, anon. Not in our hearts.
>>
>>3335330
Y-you don't need to say it.
>>
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>>3335308
>It serves only as a reminder that one day this quest is going to end
>>3335330
>Fuck Quest will end in our lifetimes
>For real this time
>And forever

I need a drink.
>>
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>[x] Anime with Noelle.

You're in your bedroom on Saturday enjoying some quality me-time with a Mizuryu Kei doujin when you hear a pelt against your window.

You're too into the images on-screen to pay any attention to that, so you don't.

But then comes another. And a few seconds later, a third.

Is someone throwing pebbles at your fucking window?

"What on earth is that?" Rose asks, looking up from between your legs.

"I didn't tell you to stop sucking," you growl.

She wipes her mouth with the back of her palm. "Is someone throwing pebbles at your fucking window?"

What a goddamn mood killer. You tug yourself back into your fly and step across the room. Glancing out the window, you see -- Noelle. You pull the window up.

"Hey weeb-fucker! Let me in!"

"Are you shitting me right now? Can't you ring the doorbell like a normal person?"

"No! I don't want to be seen coming up to your doorstep!"

"And skulking around in my backyard like a burglar looks any better?"

"The point is not to be seen! I'm here for-- oh, motherfucker."

Rose is at the window now too. "Fascist pig," she sneers. "What are you doing here?"

"Should I ask why you're alone with your cousin in his bedroom on a Saturday night?" Noelle says.

"Once re-- go to hell," Rose says. She turns to you: "Should I call my dad?"

"No," you say. "I think she's here for personal reasons. I'll go down to the patio and let her in."

Rose follows you into the hallway. "Wait just a moment now," she says. You think she's going to tell you what a bad idea it is to invite the FBI into your house, but instead she hits you with: "I didn't get my turn!"

"You'll get your fucking turn," you say. You pause at the top of the stairs. "You always do, don't you? So don't worry about it. Being under your desk gives me a kink in my neck anyway so I need some time to get ready for it."

That's the arrangement for me-time you've had with Rose stretching all the way back to high school; it hinges on reciprocating in good faith, so you're not going to upset the balance.

"Asshole," Rose grumbles, turning for her bedroom.

Down in the kitchen, you're momentarily blinded by the the house's motion-activated exterior lights coming to life as Noelle approaches the sliding-glass door. You squint at her from the other side as if deliberating whether to let her in.

She waits for a few seconds. Then, stomping, she repeats Rose's assessment from earlier: "Asshole!" Her voice is muffled by the thick glass. But after sadistically letting her hang for a bit, you relent, and let her into your home.
>>
>>3335371
Th-this is certainly a development in the Rose / Alabaster relationship.
>>
>>3335371
私。。。
>>
>>3335371
>That's the arrangement for me-time you've had with Rose stretching all the way back to high school

And they never got caught HOW?
>>
>>3335371
Well that's new
>>
>>3335371
>That's the arrangement for me-time you've had with Rose stretching all the way back to high school; it hinges on reciprocating in good faith, so you're not going to upset the balance.
It's so perfect
>>
>>3335371

It's ironic that this me-time thing is probably the most wholesome interaction in their relationship.
>>
>>3335391
Under the desk is security! You're hidden!

And I mean, everyone already knew anyway.
>>
So what crimes are you committing tonight during the warm waits, Anonymous-tachi? All caught up on Index and Kaguya here, might follow up with the Non Non Biyori movie if time permits. Anniversary project I'll put up tomorrow.
>>
>>3335482
Bloodborne for the first time!
>>
>>3335482
Pikmin 2 for the second time!
>>
"You could have told me you were coming," you say. You lead her back to your room.

"I didn't know I was until about an hour ago," Noelle says. "I was bored at home and just kind of decided... well." She hands you a thumb drive. "I've got Yuru Camp on there."

"Yeah, no," you say, pocketing the drive. "I'm not Stuxnetting myself. I'll torrent it." You sit down at your computer and begin to do exactly that. You don't bother to hide the fact of what was on your screen before that.

Noelle shakes her head. "You are such a jerk. I'm risking my job just by being here, you know."

"That's very sweet of you, but you can understand how my trust might be at a critical low right now."

"It smells like wet dick in here," Noelle says, glancing around. "Do you just have a fetish for girls named Rose or what?"

"I don't know what you're talking about. But my living room is open if you'd rather watch down there, when this is finished downloading."

"I'd rather not have to deal with anyone else," she says. "Who knows what fresh hells await in the orgy house."

"Pull up a chair, then."

"Wait -- shit. You don't have a real TV in here?" Noelle seems amazed that a billionaire could forego such conveniences.

"Somehow I prefer watching things on my computer screen. I never saw the need for a TV."

Noelle sits beside you. Even if she complained, she seems to understand implicitly what you mean.

"We can watch a few episodes," she tells you. "Then if you want to keep going, we totally can... otherwise, I'll take a recommendation from you. I'm sure it's bound to be better than anything the MAC suggested."

"Oh, this ought to be good. They gave you recs?"

Noelle counts on her fingers: "Death Note, Attack on Titan, Haruhi, Dragon Maid, One Piece, Madoka..."

"Well..." you say. "There's some good stuff in there, too, at least."

"Oh gee," Noelle says, then, impersonating a wheezy, lispy nerd: "Hey Alabashter. Have you have ever heard of thish obshcure ah-nee-may called Mad-o-ka? It'sh pretty high level shtuff."

"Okay, so their recommendations were at best useless and at worst awful. But at least there's a glimmer of hope for them -- right?"

"There is no hope for those people. You're only saying that because you put your penis in one of them. You don't want to believe that you've been brought to such a low."

"You're so hung up on that. Are you jealous of Rose2? And are you jealous of Rose, too?"

"You only wish," Noelle says. "I always exclude the ugly bastard tag."

"Yeah, well, ugly bastards have a way of ignoring those types of protests."

"Oh?" Noelle says. "Am I in danger, now? Should I be quaking in my boots?"

"I think I'm probably the one in danger here. Letting a fed into your house is sort of like inviting a vampire in, isn't it?"

"I'll let the Roses handle sucking you dry. I'm just here to watch cute 2D girls being cute."

You can at least agree to that.
>>
>>3335491
This will be the only time I say this in a Fuck Quest thread.

Don't wake up, no matter what.
>>
>>3335501
I love Noelle's bants.
>>
>>3335501
>I'm just here to watch cute 2D girls being cute.
So are we, kind of.
>>
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>>3335501
>"You only wish," Noelle says. "I always exclude the ugly bastard tag."
>>
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>>3335501
I just got a scary thought. Has anyone in the Anime Club ever heard of Bakemonogatari? Should we be the one's to do that?
>>
>>3335501
>I'm just here to watch cute 2D girls being cute
/ourguy/
>>
>>3335523
I'd argue that that's also pretty entry level
>>
>>3335501
Banter with Noelle really is something special.
>>
>>3335530
It'd be enough to blow their minds, though.
>>
>>3335501
Man, her banter is top tier. We definitely need more of her.
>>
>>3335530
It's entry level, but still probably something a lot of them wouldn't have heard of. Like, maybe the people who were still recommending haruhi in 2019, but i really doubt the average AoT fan is gonna have any clue what monogatari is.

I just got a bunch of my friends to watch Haruhi yesterday, actually. It went over better than I expected :V
>>
>>3335501
These bants are too good. What does Noelle want?
>>
>>3335551
Dick.
>>
>>3335557
That was implicit. What else does she want?
>>
>>3335551
To smell like Alabastor's dick, of course.
>>
>>3335511
>>3335539
>>3335545
>>3335551
Kay > Noelle
>>
>>3335371
>Mizuryu Kei doujin
Say, what's everyone's favorite? The new Dragon Quest one is pretty good.
>>
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>>3335571

Kay + Noelle
>>
>>3335571
I'll be honest, I want to make this girl who calls us "cum-stink," stink like cum.
Kay, and her erotic, delicious sweat is another conversation entirely.
>>
>>3335571
Why would you say something so controversial yet so bold?

I want to fill the hole of loneliness in Noelle's heart ;w;
>>
>>3335587
>Falling for government tricks
>>
>>3335587
>Why would you say something so controversial yet so bold?
Cause it's true
>>
>>3335592
E-even government girls need love! If we restore her faith in humanity, we can restore her belief in the rights of the people!
>>
>>3335606
You're getting honey potted anon
>>
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Noelle grabs a can of pringles off your desk and begins snacking on them -- without asking. Already taking liberties.

You can count on her for one thing, at least: she's got passable taste. Of course there's hardly anything resembling yuri undertones, in a series that could have really gone all-out on it (adolescent girls camping together in the woods is a setup rife for it) -- so you wonder whether Noelle is holding back on delivering the goods. She was always more the type to dig series where the girls are perpetually on the verge of pinning each other down and going knuckle-deep.

She's super into it, though -- this was clearly a favorite of hers from recent seasons. You wonder whether there's a kind of nostalgic wistfulness underpinning that. You can picture her as someone who camped a lot in her youth, even if she may not get out much now (judging by her pallid skin tone). And she's weirdly eager to know that you enjoy the series also. That simply could be some sort of desperation to finally hang out with a person who shares her opinions to some small degree, though.

"It's pretty good," you admit.

"Fucking finally." There it is: "I tried to show a couple slice of life series at MAC and they said my tastes were weird and boring. The utter imbeciles. Thank you."

After the prerequisite three episodes, you know you'll give the full run its dues. But it's time for something else.

"Hey Noelle," you say. "Have you ever heard of this obscure anime called Psycho Pass? It's pretty high level stuff..."

"End yourself."

"Geez. All right, let's try again. For real this time. I'll tell you something to piss you off even more: I ended up dropping Magical Witchy--"

"You WHAT?"

"I dunno. I just kind of stopped watching it. No reason."

Magical Witchy ~Pero Pero~ was bar none Noelle's favorite anime of winter 2017, and the two of you bonded over your fandom. It's utter tripe of course, a series about little girls in skimpy clothes who battle monsters, but there's something special and transfixing about it, and Noelle agrees. Its second season aired in Summer 2018. Your attention was a little divided back then, for many reasons. Keeping all caught up on anime was low on the priority list. Plus it reminded you of her, and you weren't too happy with her then -- still aren't. Now you have a chance to make amends.

"You're almost as bad as the MAC," she says. "I should arrest you on principle."

"Sorry, but I'm full up. I've got enough girls who want to put me in handcuffs."

Noelle rolls her eyes.

"If you don't mind rewatching it, I'll just pick up where I left off," you say.

"Where did you stop?"

"Not far in. I only made it past to the third episode."

"Oh..." she says. "Well, the second season gets pretty raunchy. So that's a fair warning. I don't know if you get second-hand embarrassment watching that kind of thing in the presence of another person."

Not at all, of course. You cue up the next episode you haven't seen.

(please wait warmlier)
>>
>>3335671
Ohhh man.
>>
>>3335671
>(please wait warmlier)
this is me
>>
>>3335671
Warmlying
>>
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>>3335671

>Have you ever heard of this obscure anime called Psycho Pass?

Also I've felt this sting of second-hand embarrassment one too many times.
>>
>>3335671
>"Hey Noelle," you say. "Have you ever heard of this obscure anime called Psycho Pass? It's pretty high level stuff..."
>Psycho Pass
Ohhhh man

>(please wait warmlier)
Stop teasing us OP
>>
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>>3335694
What next? Kemono Friends?
>>
Did we go ded for an hour or did we get daylight savingsed?
>>
>>3335756
Our daylight got saved.
>>
>>3335756
Daylight Savings a shit. A SHIT!
>>
I'm pretty drunk and actually not sure
>>
>>3335756
We're under the effects of King Crimson
>>
>>3335762
>King Crimson erased the time in which the pastebin was posted
Truly a diabolical villain.
>>
>>3335759
You say that now, but the sun is going to go down at 7PM tonight where 2 months ago it was going down around 4:30PM. I'm rather keen on it
>>
>>3335767
KC keeps the effect so it would still be posted, if anything it'd be GER who removed the pastebin
>>
>>3335767
Quick! Tell OP Studios to add hands fuckery! Kira will BTD us to a timeline with the pastebin!
>>
Happy 5th anniversary /fq/, it's been an honor questing with you fags.

To celebrate I've made a pastebin of all of the lewds from season 1, complete with tags and links, as I always thought it'd be super convenient to have one

Took me like a month to make this but I'm sure I'm still missing shit, especially with the tags and names so with you think that there's a tag missing or come up with a better name, please tell me so I can change it

Enjoy
https://pastebin.com/rkSCNTEa
>>
>>3335794
This is actually pretty cool

Thanks
>>
>>3335794
You're a treasure.
>>
>>3335794
Good shit, Anon.
>>
>>3335794

Thanks for the hard work, anonymous-dono.
>>
>>3335794

You are just my favourite kind of autist
>>
>>3335794
I've actually wanted something like this for a while now, but was too lazy to do it.
Good job anon.
>>
>>3335808
>>3335812
>>3335822
>>3335833
>>3335838
>>3335846
Anytime anons, anytime
>>
>>3335794
>Stackleford snivels. He seems close to losing it completely and bawling as you approach the stolen food cart. You grab a calzone from it, smiling at him warmly, and take a bite. It's pepperoni -- your favorite.
>"You're right," you say, looking him directly in the eye. "This is delicious."
This, right here, peak Alabastard, best scene in all of FQ, never gets old.
>>
So what is everyone doing as they wait warmly? Currently I'm running through DMC5 the second time.
>>
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>>3335874

We paid a heavy price for our sins on that day.
>>
>>3335877
Now I'm working on my anniversary project. I'll post it tonight, closer to the original episode 1 posting. I hope you guys like it!
>>
>>3335877
Listening to the playlist and playing osrs
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ncjy-f_wafs&list=PLQuvSDXjKZJoYr8WKcEL8NEeaYylH_KQN
>>
>>3335874
I dunno, even then I think we were heartless, Stackleford is what's wrong with a lot of things, but we've wronged him a lot. We're responisble for him losing his crush (Whitney), his crush (Rose), his crush (Rose2), and his girlfriend (his hand), the guy deserves better treatment than from his ostensible friend.
>>
>>3335904
The Alaheartless savagery is what makes it better, honestly
If Stacks wasn't such a fucking dork, it wouldn't have happened, that's the price you pay for being a loser
>>
>>3335877
Hastily working on my consolation anniversary gift since there was no way I was gonna finish the real one in time.
>>
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>>3335874
Damn right, I thought that was hilarious, especially posts like pic related. I don't know why everybody fell for such obvious NTR bait

>>3335904
>We're responisble for him losing his crush (Whitney), his crush (Rose), his crush (Rose2),
No we weren't. He was never going to get even close to being with one of them even if we never existed
>>
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>>3335916
Be honest IaTM was it supposed to be pic related?
>>
>>3335920
>That pic
Oh god, my sides are in orbit
>>
>>3335886
>I'll post it tonight, closer to the original episode 1 posting. I hope you guys like it!
Wait didn't that already pass? The archive says it was posted on 02:12 for me. Am I dumb
>>
>>3335920
ayo where'd that come
>>
>>3335954
No. Wait. I'm the retard. I kept thinking 11:12 PM PST on 3/10, when the reality is technically 11:12 PM PST on 3/9. You have it right.

Welp. Either way, this is gonna take time for me to finish I've been way busier than expected with job interview prep amongst other things so I'll have it up at some point today. Promise.
>>
>>3335956
?

If you're talking about the pic, it was a post that some anon made during the thread where we ntr'd the Stackle

https://foolz.fireden.net/a/thread/104640917/#104645250
>>
>>3335965
Oh ok it's fine then. Good luck on that interview anon
>>
We've been waiting warmly for over 2 and a half hours. That's how it works right?
>>
>>3335983
It's only been an hour and a half, Anonymous-dono. Daylight Savings a shit!
>>
>>3335942
It was supposed to be a lot more including that.
>>
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>>3335983
>>
>>3335983
OP's sick. He warned us that this episode might go slower than usual.
>>
Daylight savings or no, I'm gettin real sleepy.
>>
>>3335984
Well it sure as hell feels like 3 hours
>>
>>3336002
You think you'll be able to finish it by the end of this season or should I assume I'm gonna have to lurk in the ghost thread? No pressure of course
>>
It's 4:21 on 3/10

Begin the ritual.
>>
It is now 4:21 AM on March 10th, 2019.
>>
>>3336028
Time to mcfucking kill myself.
>>
>>3336028
Sasuga anon
>>
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>>3336028
>>3336030
>>
>>3336021
Considering I'm making basically the same thing but smaller right now maybe, I hope at least. it's more than just the character images.
>>
>>3336043
Do you best IaTM!
>>
Oh yeah, we're past the real two-hour mark now. Getting toasty.
>>
https://pastebin.com/bFCCqZBg
>>
>>3336068
It's time.
>>
>>3336068
It is time
>>
>>3336068
I can't believe it.
>>
>>3336068
lovely
>>
>>3336068
The time is now
>>
>>3336068
Behold as Alabaster converts a Christmas Cake into a creampie!

Truly, the greatest magician of our time. 10/10 Sorceror Supreme.
>>
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>>3336068
>>
>>3336068
finally some fucking keki
>>
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>>3336068

The cakes are going to go extinct at this rate!
>>
>>3336068
>stay all the way inside without moving
One of my favorite fetishes. So simple. So sweet. So erotic. So hard to find anywhere.
Bless you, OP.
>>
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>>3336068
This season really does put the fuck in fuck quest.
>>
>>3335970
Shit, I meant to reply to >>3335942
lel
>>
GIRLS FUCKED: 10/12

"Oh my god. Why did you cum in me?"

"Uh. I'm thinking it's because you told me to cum in you. I could be wrong, but that seems like a good explanation."

Noelle is trying to wipe the remnants away with wad after wad of tissue, but more just keeps seeping out -- you're nothing if not prodigious.

"Ugh," she purrs, "I'm gonna reek like your jism for a year."

"Don't be a drama queen. It'll be half a year, tops."

She cracks her neck and then flops back onto your mattress. "You mind if I sleep here? I don't feel like crawling back over your gates and walking to the bus stop right now."

"You may be attacked in the night by an ugly bastard," you warn her.

"That's fine."

"Or a pack of deranged lesbians."

"Also fine."

You crawl into bed with her and find yourselves curled up, spooning.

"This is a one-night stand," she tells you.

"Right."

She wiggles against you, finding a comfortable spot. "Never again."

"Never." Your hand, draped over her body, finds one of her hands, and holds it.

"I'm serious, Alabaster -- don't patronize me. This is a mistake. Not to be repeated. I won't be back."

"Goodnight, Noelle."

You fall asleep together.
>>
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>>3336118
>hand-holding outside a pastebin
>>
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On Sunday night, we'll hit the bar.
>>
>>3336118
Time to go dream of former cakes.
>>
>>3336124
Have a good night OP. And of course, sleep well. Make sure you're getting plenty of vitamins and healthy food! Big meals always help me when I'm sick!
>>
>>3336124
A wholesome end to a wholesome night
>>
>>3336124
Thank you, and Happy Anniversary, pal.
>>
>>3336124
Good shit, OP. Get well soon.
>>
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>>3336124

Thanks for the hard work OP! Happy anniversary, here's a family movie night!

Rest of the set: https://imgur.com/a/bXa1VJr
https://imgur.com/a/aFC3Isl
>>
>>3336118
This is great

>>3336124
Night OP see you tomorrow
>>
>>3336142
... holy shit.
>>
>>3336068
>>3336118
Dear god, was that consensual love making in the missionary position followed by post coital hand holding in bed?

>>3336123
THE SHEER DEGENERACY, THE DEGENERACY!!!
>>
>>3336142
>another OC commission
n i c e
>>
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>>3335794

I wanted to recognize this before leaving, because it's a great effort -- and I know just how disorganized things were in season 1 between the hectic threads, board migration, and general craziness, so this took a lot of work. Thank you.

>>3336142

Wow on this, too.

Did you draw this, or spend money to have it drawn?

Either way, I'm beyond flattered. Also turned on. A lot.

...I'll be in my bunk.
>>
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>>3336152

It's a commission by the same person as the Rose one from last year. Glad you like it, hope you feel better!
>>
>>3336152
No problem OP, I wanted to contribute something for the anniversary because you've made me love this shitty smut quest so much
>>
>>3336124
Happy five years, OP! You deserve your sleep.
>>
>>3336124
Happy anniversary OP! Take care of yourself ;_;

I only found out about this quest a year ago, but it's kind of crazy how quickly it's become a huge fixture in my life. Thanks for all the good times, OP!
>>
>>3336118
Man, Rose is going to be pissed that she didn't get her turn
>>
>>3336202
She'll get her turn, Anon.
>>
>>3336142
Absolutely based
>>
>>3336118
That's real fucking sweet. I hope we get more talking with Noelle.
>>
>>3336124

Well, work on Monday is going to be rough.
>>
>>3336596
You really should be used to it by now anon
>>
>>3337175
I didn't mean for us, I meant for "us", what with going to the bar on a Sunday night.
>>
>>3337227
Well I heard that fucking traps and idols is the perfect cure for hangovers. Trust me on this
>>
>>3337298
So you're saying Alex will dress like an idol?
>>
>>3338137
I'm saying we should fuck Alex or the actual Idol. Both at the same time would also be acceptable
>>
>>3338395

I dunno, she's a known aspiring rapist, imagine what kind of danger we'd be putting him in.
>>
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The Drunken Robot is classic Silicon Valley kitsch, a gastropub full of nerd paraphernalia like a scale replica ENIAC above the bar, wallpaper that looks like circuitry, and tables with smart tablets built right in so you can order and reorder without having to flag down waitstaff. At the front, you and Dr. Carte are greeted by a Pepper robot hacked to be surly and confrontational. "You assholes want a fucking table or are you going to sit at the bar?" the robot demands, voice polite despite the obscene language.

"We're here for trivia night," Dr. Carte tells it.

The robot beeps and boops, and its eyes swirl with neon colors, as it processes this reply. Finally it comes back with: "Neeeeerds."

"Oh, screw you," Dr. Carte says.

Beep boop, light swirling, and then: "I do not have a fetish for humans."

"This is the least helpful hostess ever," you say.

"And you are the least attractive human ever. Meatbag."

"Let's just grab a seat at the bar," Dr. Carte says.

"Grab this," the robot says as you walk past, cupping its crotch with one hand.

Dr. Carte turns in anger and you have to haul her back by her collar before she slugs the thing. "Don't -- it's not worth it," you tell her.

"You're lucky my man was here to stop me!" She shouts after the robot as you drag her into the bar proper.

Prices at the Drunken Robot are all in binary, how cute, but of course you're paying in base-10. A pint of beer runs anywhere from $10.00 on the low end, up to, as quoted on the menu, $10.00 + $1.11 + 1.01 + $1.00. Just what you wanted -- having to do arithmetic before ordering a drink.

The bartender is a gangling ginger with what he must believe is a good beard since he's wearing it in public. Dr. Carte waves him over. She has her priorities straight: first she orders a rum and coke, then she asks how to register for trivia night.

The bartender's eyes light up about as brightly as the robotic hostess. He runs back to the wall where all the liquor sits on display and presses a button there. Klaxons sound as he grabs a microphone and shouts: "We have new contestants! Neeeeeewwwww contestants for the Brainy Lovers' Bowl!" Cheesy royalty-free gameshow music plays, and patrons at the bar begin to chant: "new blood! New blood!"

Suddenly the mic is in your face. "Tell us about yourself! Who are you and who's this lovely lady accompanying you? Batting out of your league, big guy! Are you betrothed?"

"Betrothed--" you choke. "What? I-- I'm Alabaster and, uh, this is my girlfriend's--"

"I'm Renee. We're engaged."

"Engaged!" The bartender chirps. "How wonderful. When's the wedding?"

"We aren't--" you begin.

"December!" Dr. Carte says. "We're very excited. It's gonna be Star Trek themed."

"Phasers set to looooove," the bartender croons. "Well you two lovebirds came to the right place, because we're gonna be getting started in about ten minutes! Drink up and have fun, you two!"

The patrons clap for you.
>>
>>3338406
>It's gonna be Star Trek themed.
IT'S BEEN A LONG ROAD
>>
"What the fuck did you take me to?" You whisper from the corner of your mouth.

"It's a couple's night thing," Dr. Carte says. "Didn't I mention that? I'm sure I mentioned that."

Her mock ignorance isn't fooling you.

"Well, the rules say it's for couples only," Dr. Carte explains when you give her a displeased look. "So play along, huh? Is it that awful if a few strangers think I'm your fiancee?"

You nurse an obnoxiously bitter pint of craft IPA while you wait for the game to start. Dr. Carte is excitedly knocking back a second rum and coke already. You warn her: "I don't want to have to carry you. Don't get too drunk."

"Oh, so you're fine with being carried but not with doing the carrying. I see how it is."

"I'm serious--"

"Why the hell do you think I'm watering my liquor down with soda?" She says. "Cut me some slack. If you don't stop bitching at me, I'm calling off the wedding."

"Stop pretending you're the one I'm marrying alr-- oh, motherfucker." Just like Noelle's, your reaction to seeing Rose is usually negative. She strolls up to the bar as casual as can be.
>>
>>3338406
Renee's favorite Trek is DS9, right? It better be.

>>3338416
No.

>>3338417
Oh yes.
>>
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>>3338417

This was all a plot to NTR us from her daughter's official dating position! She must know how easily we go with the flow!
>>
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Close behind her is Vivian. She's walking in reverse, giving the side-eye to that unfriendly robot at the front entrance, simultaneously insulted and perplexed by the thing.

"What are you doing here?" You demand, although you're beginning to understand the gist of what's up.

"Oh!" Rose says, feigning surprise. "What a pleasant surprise. I had no idea you two were coming out tonight."

"Pleasant isn't how I'd put it," Dr. Carte says. "Did you come to get curbstomped like the rest of them?"

"Oh my, no," Rose says. "I came to win. So did my girlfriend, Vivian."

Vivian makes it to the bar now and, in an uncharacteristic show of warmth, she hugs both you and Dr. Carte. "Greetings," she says to each of you in turn -- so, still not quite up to speed on the intricacies of appearing fully human.

"What's with that?" You ask her.

"Hmm?"

"The hugging."

"I am trying to be more affectionate."

"I for one think that's wonderful," Dr. Carte says. "I'm always up for affection from Vivian Darkbloom."

Rose gets the bartender's attention and informs him that she'll be playing. He repeats that outlandish performance with the klaxon and the music and the microphone-shoved-in-face, although Rose handles it more suavely:

"Oh yes, this is my special lady friend," she says. "We've been together for several months now."

"We are madly, passionately in love," Vivian avers as if reading from a cue card. Rose must have coached her.

"Is she, uh -- age of consent?" The bartender asks Rose.

"Absolutely."

"I might need to see some ID!" He laughs, although he only seems to be half joking. Then, definitely not joking here, his tone going serious: "Especially if she's gonna be drinking. We're like one strike away from getting our liquor license revoked."
>>
>>3338406
>prices not in Hex
You literally start define a hex value with $.
What a shit bar.
>>
>>3338406
>"And you are the least attractive human ever. Meatbag."

HK47? Is that you?
>>
>>3338406
Damn starting early I see

>>3338434
>Rose and Vivian
I'm so fucking ready. Let's show them who the REAL quiz God is
>>
This is approaching the level of a comedy of errors. Now in comes Cerise and Whitney -- and Mom.

"Should I even ask?" You say as they approach the bar.

Vivian does that same weird hugging thing with Whitney and Cerise, too; these are more lingering and touchy than the first ones, even. As Cerise awkwardly hugs back, swaying a bit side to side with Vivian who's got her face buried in her chest, Cerise says: "What the--? Are you feeling okay, Vivian? Did someone get diagnosed with cancer or something?"

Vivian explains her concerted effort to be more affectionate, which makes Whitney slap her knees, literally. "You're such a weirdo, sis."

"I rather think hugging is normal and wholesome and decidedly un-weird," Vivian protests.

Whitney rolls her eyes.

"Rose and Vivian might be trouble for us," Dr. Carte whispers to you, "but whatever combination those three form, I wouldn't sweat it." Focused on the details of how to win, as always -- never anything else.

"Are you playing?" You ask Mom.

"I am. I heard from Cerise that you were cavorting around with some old cow who's almost twice your age, and I had to see it with my own eyes!"

"--Excuse me?" Dr. Carte says.

"I can hardly believe it, Alabaster," Mom says. "But I suppose it can't be helped. Like mother, like daughter -- this trollop's got her claws sunk into you too, huh?"

"Now you hold on, Ms. Catachresis!" Dr. Carte yells. "I'll have you know that I treat your boy very well--"

"I know what your kind is after, thank you very much!" Mom cuts in. "Spare me the manipulative tactics. They don't work on someone who isn't thinking with their little head."

"You--!"

Thankfully the bartender salvages things before this confrontation turns ugly. "Did I hear someone else say they were playing?" He says. He hits the klaxons before anyone can answer -- itchy trigger finger.

"We're playing," Cerise says. "Me and her."

"May-December romance!" He says. "Uh, no offense. That's sweet."

"Actually, this is my -- nevermind."

"No one to pair up with, honey?" Dr. Carte asks Whitney.

"Pfft. I'm just here to get sloshed and watch you dorks dorking it up."

"Be ready," Dr. Carte purrs. "Poor Vivian is going to need a lot of consoling after tonight..."

"We shall see about that," Vivian says, haughty. "I have already divested my holdings in salt companies, in anticipation of excess supply depressing prices."

The game begins just a few moments later. You make your way to a stage -- this isn't ordinary bar trivia, but a full-on production, with special lighting, and podiums with buzzers for the pairs to stand at -- all eyes on you. But you've been under pressure like this before, and know you can handle it.

SPECIAL FUCK QUEST EVENT:
Roll a d6 to determine how many girls leave bar trivia feeling royally pissed off. The mode of all rolls will win.
>>
>>3338454
>Let's show them who the REAL quiz God is
Whitney?
>>
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>>3338454

Quiz God you say.
>>
Rolled 1 (1d6)

>>3338476
I hate you OP
>>
Rolled 4 (1d6)

>>3338476

Oh shit.
>>
Rolled 3 (1d6)

>>3338476
I love you. I hate you. I love you. I hate you.
>>
Rolled 3 (1d6)

>>3338476
Fuck you.
>>
Rolled 4 (1d6)

>>3338476
oh god it's happening again
>>
Rolled 2 (1d6)

>>3338476
OP, please.
>>
>>3338476
>>
>>3338417
>"Cut me some slack. If you don't stop bitching at me, I'm calling off the wedding."

Fucking classic
>>
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Rolled 2 (1d6)

>>3338476
Oh no. Ohhhhh no
>>
Rolled 4 (1d6)

>>3338476
>>
Rolled 5 (1d6)

>>3338476
Maybe this time it'll work?
>>
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Rolled 4 (1d6)

>>3338476
>>
>>3338476
>spoiler
Oh god, not this shit again

1d6
>>
>[4]
is the winner!

...wait, I'm sorry, it looks like I made a typo at a critical juncture here. I somehow misspelled "horny" as "royally pissed off." I don't know how this happened.

Please wait warmly.
>>
>>3338508
oh FUCK
>>
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>>3338508

nani
>>
Not a single 6 so far. Rejoice!
>>
>>3338508
yoU MOTHER FUCKER
>>
>>3338508
Ahahahaha. What the fuck OP.
>>
Ok /fq/, who' gonna leave?
>>
>>3338507

Wow, I must be some special kind of baka ass motherfucker
>>
>>3338508
>I somehow misspelled "horny" as "royally pissed off."
It's a common typo, really. it happens to the best of us.
>>
>>3338508
Truly, this is Fuck Quest.
>>
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>>3338508
>I somehow misspelled "horny" as "royally pissed off."
>>
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>>3338508
EEEEEEEEEEEH?
>>
>>3338517
Calling it now

>Mom
>Carte
>Cerise
>Rose
>>
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The three familiar teams -- you and Dr. Carte, Rose/Vivian, and Cerise/Mom, are joined on stage by a couple also-rans who don't look too tough, a fat neckbeard and his equally fat girlfriend, and a cleanly professional Japanese couple who both look small and mousy.

The format is simple, rapid-fire questions from the MC, +100 points each, -100 points for wrong answers -- until 30 minutes elapses and the team with the most takes the crown. The prize is a $30 gift card for the Sizzler (there seriously must be some sort of seedy underground criminal empire pushing that place). But of course the real thing at stake here is your pride. You can't let Rose beat you. Or any of the others, for that matter.

"What do you think?" Dr. Carte asks in the scant few moments you have to huddle up and confer before things begin. "Vivian is for sure going to be tough competition -- I've watched enough Jeopardy with her to know. But what about Rose? You were in quiz bowl with her, right? You two won a national competition together--"

"Rose won't be a problem," you insist. "She's got a good base of general knowledge but not as big as us. Her strong suit was always math... and I don't think a bar trivia game is going to ask a lot of math questions. In any case, you should be good at math too, right?"

"I'm a biologist, not a mathematician," Dr. Carte says. "That's like oil and water. You should know that."

"Let's just count on there not being a lot of math, then."

"Hold on. You majored in engineering, didn't you? You're not good at math?"

"I'm okay at math. Rose literally majored in math--"

"Oh my god. We should have prepared better--"

You steal a glance at Rose and Vivian. Between the two of them, it's hard to say who looks more smug. They're both confident, even cocky -- you'll love wiping those grins off their faces.

"What about Cerise and the old hag?" Dr. Carte asks.

"Don't talk about my mom that way."

"Tell her not to talk about me that way!"

"They'll be pushovers. Unless there's a lot of questions about Furbys or baking, you can forget about them. Just make sure we beat Rose and Vivian to the buzzer. Fuck... buzz in even if you don't know. Between us, one of us is bound to know pretty much every answer. Right?"

"Right."

The game begins.
>>
>>3338553
It begins.
>>
>>3338553
>You steal a glance at Rose and Vivian. Between the two of them, it's hard to say who looks more smug. They're both confident, even cocky -- you'll love wiping those grins off their faces.
Smug loli = best loli

>They'll be pushovers. Unless there's a lot of questions about Furbys or baking
Just you wait
>>
>>3338565
>cue Slumdog Millionaire-esque sequence of events where every question is somehow only something Cerise or Mom would know
>>
>>3338553
>They'll be pushovers. Unless there's a lot of questions about Furbys or baking
Well now they're guaranteed to win
>>
>>3338553
>I don't think a bar trivia game is going to ask a lot of math questions.
The prices are in binary, Alabaster
>>
>>3338572
>>cue Slumdog Millionaire-esque sequence of events where every question is somehow only something Whitney would know

Fixed that for you
>>
>>3338591
Shh. Don't crush his dreams
>>
>>3338553
>Her strong suit was always math... and I don't think a bar trivia game is going to ask a lot of math questions. In any case, you should be good at math too, right?"

Dude. The bar deco literally screams math nerds.
>>
>>3338598
Probably a short list of questions, then.
>>
>>3338606
Take that back!
>>
>>3338619
:P
>>
>>3338606
>half of the questions are about automotive repair, lesbian rape, track and field/soccer, and a single throwback question about oology
>>
>>3338628
>lesbian rape
I need to go to that bar
>>
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"For 100 points: What is the integral of sin(x)+cos(x)+x^2?"

"Are you FUCKING kidding me--" you sputter.

Rose is already buzzed in. "-cos(x)+sin(x)+1/3 x^3," she says breezily. "Plus a constant, of course."

"Correct," the host says. He presses something on his tablet. The tablet mounted on the front of Rose and Vivian's podium, acting as a digital scoreboard, increments to 100.

Dr. Carte leans against your podium and massages her forehead with the heels of her palms. Rose and Vivian are grinning at you. You simmer.

"Wooo!" Whitney cheers from the tables in the restaurant area, hands cupped to her mouth.

"For 100 points: Voodoo purple, lagoona, tart tangerine, and cow are all varieties of what popular toy?"

Cerise is already buzzed in before the host is done reading. "Furby! Those are Furbys!" She shouts.

"Correct! 100 points to Team Soliloquy."

Mom and Cerise high-five. "That's it, baby!" Mom says. "Let's kick their butt!" You feel sick.

"Wooo!" Whitney cheers, again. She clearly doesn't have a horse in this race.

"Just buzz in," you tell Dr. Carte. "Buzz in no matter what -- we'll get the answer afterwards."

"Yes. Good idea."

"In Marcel Proust's epic novel Remembrance of Things Past, what is the name of the narrator's love interest who leaves him and then dies in an accident?"

Dr. Carte does as instructed. But you have no idea -- and neither does she. "Oh my god," she's saying over and over, a broken record. "Do you know? I don't know. Oh my god."

"...Mary?" You guess.

"Oooh, sorry. -100 points from Team Submarine. I'll repeat the question--"

But Vivian buzzes in and answers: "Albertine."

"Correct! Another 100 points to Team Whiterose."

"Wooo!"

Dr. Carte literally beats her fists against the podium and grunts in anger. You'd normally think she's taking things too seriously, but you're about as upset right now.

"For 100 points--"

"Fuck's sake," you say. "Every question is 100 points. Why do you keep saying 'for 100 points'? Durr. Just get on with it. Jesus Christ. This is unbearable."

"...Uh. For 100 points: the confection mille-feuille is composed of alternating layers of what two primary ingredients?"

Mom is quick on the buzzer: "Puff pastry and custard. That's obvious!"

"Wooo!"

Dr. Carte violently scratches her head and growls.
>>
>>3338633
The big heh.
>>
>>3338633
>mille-feuille
>
>>
>>3338633
But of course.
>>
>>3338633
>Team Submarine
Of course
>>
>>3338633
Sad that Renee is in the line of fire, but this is hilarious for me.
>>
>>3338476
>I have already divested my holdings in salt companies, in anticipation of excess supply depressing prices.
Oh God, that's precious
>>
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>>3338633

Stop! They're already dead!
>>
So how are we spending this lovely sunday /fq/?
I watched Baby Driver with my parents so I missed the first hour of festivities.
It was alright and the directing was pretty darn great. I like it in the same way I like RED, and that's saying something.
That said, Drive is better. Drive is pure Kino.
>>
>>3338653

Absolutely nothing, it's great.
>>
>>3338653
Making a sandwich and trying to finish a mafia setup. Oh man, Baby Driver is amazing. Edgar Wright is some kind of genius or something, every movie of his that I've seen is gold.
>>
>>3338653
Still working on this fucking thing >>3335916
>>
>>3338653
I've been playing Devil May Cry, thinking we were picking this up at 9 again.
>>
>>3338656
It made me want to watch Hot Fuzz again. The more I watch Hot Fuzz the more I pick up on.
>>
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Who we fucking last boys? Gal or Cerise?
>>
>>3338753
Both of them. Simultaneously.
>>
>>3338753
Both in one threesome.
>>
>>3338753
I hope Gal's last but it's probably gonna be Cerise

>>3338757
Also a great option
>>
>>3338753
>>3338757
>>3338759
Something something 'gonna need TWO GIGANTIC DICKS' etc.
>>
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A bizarre confluence of coincidences means that even as the game progresses and you finally rack up a healthy score -- the other four girls manage to keep even with you and Dr. Carte. From questions about famous celebrity chefs, to the discoverer of quaternions, to TS Eliot's first wife, to the amalgam most commonly used in soldering -- it seems like every other question is purposely designed to play to someone else's single biggest avenue of expertise.

It all comes down to the final question -- it's a tie match, and to the winner go the spoils. Rose and Vivian aglow with excitement; Rose's face is deeply flushed and her hair is damp with sweat, while Vivian is almost hyperventilating. At the next podium over, Mom's expression is pure, steely determination, and Cerise is so surprised at being in contention that she's smiling goofily.

"If this is a fucking integral..." Dr. Carte tells you, "I'm tanning your hide."

"Did you beam down from the 1800s with that threat?" You say.

"Tanning. Your. Hide."

"For 100 points, and sweet victory: the study of eggs is commonly called what?"

You buzz in. High on adrenaline and feeling gracious in the thrill of defeating your opponents, you begin: "I want to thank Whitney for this one." You point at her, smiling. "Thanks, Whitney."

"Ally! Shut the fuck up--"

"The answer is oology," you finish.

"Uh," the host says. "I'm sorry, but... you didn't actually buzz in first. Team Whiterose?"

"Oology," Rose says. "The answer is oology."

"Correct! Congratulations!"

You feel like you've been punched in the stomach. You blink -- your mouth goes dry -- you move your jaw but no words come out. Rose just won. She just beat you.

"No no no no no no," Dr. Carte says. "Oh, no. No. No." She's got her hands clasped over her mouth.

Rose and Vivian hug. Rose is so happy that she actually lifts Vivian a little bit off the ground, back arching, and twirls around with her a couple times.

When her feet are back on the ground again, Vivian, thrilling, kisses Rose on the lips. Rose is taken aback by that, but shrugs and rolls with it -- they're posing as girlfriends after all.

Mom and Cerise are gracious losers -- they didn't expect to win to begin with -- they just smile at each other and shrug.

Meanwhile, you and Dr. Carte are like soldiers back from the trenches of WWI: hollow, dead inside. The clapping of the bar's patrons is a distant patter in your ears, as if you've been lifted bodily up and away from this place.
>>
>>3338766
The biggest oof.
>>
>>3338766
In the face of death, I smile.
>>
>>3338766
Son of a BITCH.
>>
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>>3338766
>>
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>>3338766
>>
>>3338766
Whitney clutches it, and Alabaster screws it up. What a wild ride.
>>
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>>3338766

The kiss was cute at least.
>>
>>3338766
>"For 100 points, and sweet victory: the study of eggs is commonly called what?"
I'm not even surprised
>>
"Goddamn it, Ally! You never listen to me!" Whitney flicks another peanut shell at your face, which you bat away, and return to sucking down your Corona. You're deep into your third bottle and getting a little buzzed now -- not as bad as Dr. Carte, though, who's practically falling over. Across the table from you, the winners are preening and sharing a bowl of ice cream together, feeding each other -- ugh.

"I knew the answer anyway," Rose tells Whitney. "I would never forget that display at the national competition... so yes, thank you."

"Face it, Alabaster Soliloquy," Vivian says. "Superior minds have prevailed." She folds her hands one atop the other, and demurely and lets Rose give her the last gloopy spoonful of half-melted ice cream. After swallowing, she adds: "Your folly was believing you could stand against us to begin with."

"This -- this is your fault," Dr. Carte says, pointing at you. "We lost 100 points because you told me to buzz in on that fucking Proust shit. We would have won without that!"

"Don't..." you grumble. "I'm gonna be sick..."

Whitney flicks a peanut shell at you.

Mom tries to leaven the bitter feelings in your heart: "You were impressive tonight. Err-- n-not that I want to admit it, but... w-well, maybe if you weren't so stupid as to tether yourself to this hussy, you would have done even better tonight..."

"Oh my god, lady," Dr. Carte says. "Call me a hussy one more time. I will put my fist so far up your--"

"I'm getting a mite sleepy," Vivian says. "I think it is time for me to depart..."

"You're the only one sober," Cerise says -- from behind a pyramid of beer bottles. "You and Ms. Catachresis. Do you guys mind being Uber tonight?"

"I would love to drag a gaggle of drunkards around town," Mom says, "but I have a long drive ahead of me already. You'll have to leave things to this strange, small, anemic little girl."

Vivian sighs. "So be it. Perhaps we can make a sleepover of it at Whitney's abode."

This gets the gears in your head spinning. You glance at Dr. Carte. "Hey... still mad at Rose and Vivian?" You whisper.

"You have no fucking idea."

"How about a little payback?"
>>
>>3338791
Oh god oh god oh god.
>>
>>3338791
I like where this is going
>>
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>>3338791
>Renee tag-team
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>>3338791
Uh oh.
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>>3338791
>>
>>3338791
>4 girls leaving horny
>Whitney, Renee, Vivian, and Rose
>mfw
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This one may take a while and it'll probably be the last post of the episode, so strap yourselves in while Renee straps herself in.
>>
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>>3338820
oh boy oh boy oh boy
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>>3338820
>>
While we wait warmly for OP, I gift you my humble offering for these anniversary celebrations, /fq/.

A transcript of a recording of a happier time in an alternate universe of Fuck Quest, where the gang is able to come together for a session of one of humanity's oldest traditional games.

I speak, of course, of Dungeons and Dragons.

I present to you, Galatea's Magical Realm.

https://pastebin.com/ZZJsA8zW
>>
>>3338820
waiting strapply
>>
>>3338820
Quite an abrupt way to end it, don't you think?
>>
>>3338820
You have my attention
>>
>>3338820
Oh man, better timing than expected.
>>
>>3338826
Oh shit, this is long. This better be good anon, I'll bully you if it isn't
>>
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>>3338834
I'll never claim to be the wordsmith OP is, but I do hope it manages to entertain. Gentle bullying only pls.
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>>3338837
>https://pastebin.com/ZZJsA8zW
Ehhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
>>
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>>3338841
H-how should I interpret this?
>>
>>3338826

Thanks for the effort, anonymous-dono!
>>
>>3338847
Wasn't too bad, wasn't too good. Just ehhhhhh.
>>
>>3338852
That's fair. Thank you for your honest feedback.

>>3338849
~
>>
>>3338820
OH BOI, LETS GET IT ON.

Oh, and have a Happy Super Mar 10, everyone.
>>
>>3338820
Spit Rose and spitroast on the menu it looks like.
>>
So this will be the largest orgy in Fuck Quest history thus far, yes? And the first chance at spitroasting and double penetration? Do we get to high-five Renee while pumping Rose?
>>
>>3338826
This makes me think that we should play Munchkin with Whitney.
>>
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>TFW we don't get to visit the Catachresis household
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>>3338923
The curse is haunting this thread as we speak, slowing our progress and sickening the OP. It's all a part of this cruel reality's plot to force upon us a fourth season.
>>
>>3338826
I agree with >>3338852, it was pretty meh overall. I was hoping it would be bad so I could laugh at it
>>
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>>3338937
>>
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>>3338923
Oh yeah he did mention that. You let us down OP...
>>
>>3338931
i still wanna know what god damn sorcery Carmillia pulled to survive her own suicide by removing darkbloom at the end of last season, thats some grade A bullshit right there, clone mom means literally nothing comparatively.
>>
>>3338837
Not a bad attempt. You were good at getting most characters voice down. If you had trimmed a few cast members it would probably be pretty good. Nothing next to op, but that’s not a fair comparison.
>>
>>3338948
That wasn't her, anon. That was some girl with blue hair and red eyes, r e m e m b e r ?
>>
>>3338951
Yeah, it really makes me appreciate even more the kind of effort OP goes through to deliver the goods. Especially considering I had essentially infinite time compared to the between 10 minutes and 2 hours OP usually manages to deliver. Leaves me super in awe.
>>
>>3338923
>>3338947

We're getting a Rose™, a little sister (blood related to someone) and a mom (generic, compare to the active ingredient in Catachresis), so really this package is equivalent, if not also clearly superior.
>>
>>3338987
Yeah but we've known all of them since season 1. I love them all but I would like it if some of the newer girls got some more attention desu...
>>
>>3339021
>I would like it if some of the newer girls got some more attention
Rose calling Noelle fascist pig got me excited on future confrontations between the two.
>>
>>3339021
>I love them all but I would like it if some of the newer girls got some more attention desu...
I feel the same in all honesty
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FUCK
Well, I'm late, but It's still the 10th in three other American time zones, and most importantly in Palo Alto. So here's my consolation gift, /fq/.

It's a Gameboy ROM with all the harem members across all three seasons and Ally, no music. Run it in your emulator of choice or on any Gameboy hardware with a flash cartridge. Left/Right to scroll through them all.
https://my.mixtape.moe/eqfqur.gb

Mixtape doesn't allow custom filenames, but just my luck, the random one is spat out has FQ in it.
>>
>>3339091
>1998
How deep does this rabbit hole go?
>>
>>3339091
Trackman? more like madman
>>
>>3339091

Nice work, IaTM-dono.
>>
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>>3339091
Super sugoi.
>>
>>3338826
>>3339091
I love this kind of stuff. Thank you both.
Really, well done, guys.
>>
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>>3339110
>>3339116
ueeehhhhh?
>>
https://pastebin.com/QPVwbvMD
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>>3339124
The time has come, and so have I.
>>
>>3339124
Is this the new longest wait?
>>
>>3339120
I have a bad habit of deleting posts when I don't like how they sound when reading them, after the fact.
>>
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>"Well what the fuck sound should I make, then?"
>"Bang bang bang?" Dr. Carte offers.
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>>3339124

Them explaining this concept to Ms. Carte is extremely amusing to me. TENDERNESS
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>>3339124
>"Doink doink?" You say. "Like on Law and Order."

>"Yeah, sure. That really sets the mood. Doink doink. Great thinking, Ally, you fucking dweeb."
>>
>>3339021
>>3339048
This was a very season 1 harem focused episode because of the date! But I also agree that the newer girls need space to stretch out and shine as well. Next week we'll definitely see some more of them.

>>3339091
Oh my goodness. I'll need to give this its proper dues when I'm not so tired and sick, but thank you, so much. And to all the other OC creators. I can't describe how much it means to me, that this means enough to you to put this kind of effort in.

>>3338826
This, too. I never considered that something I created would ever have people drawing things, making side-projects, or writing fanfiction.

---

There may be a proper closer to this episode posted within the next day or two, nothing terribly plot relevant, but something to end on besides a lewd scene. For now, though, I really need my sleep.
>>
>>3339149
Good stuff, OP. Night.
>>
>>3339149
Goodnight OP!
>>
>>3339149
Thanks again, OP. Please get well!
>>
>>3339149

Thanks for your hard work! Love you OP.
>>
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>>3339149
Thanks for another good one OP studios!
>>
>>3339124
"Rose has a safe word she can use," you offer.
"Really?" Dr. Carte says. "I didn't take you two for people capable of playing nice together."
"There were some... unfortunate events..." you say. "Look, anyway, she'll say 'tenderness' if she doesn't like it."
Holy shit it also happened in this timeline?
>>
>>3339175
There's only one timeline. It all repeats.
>>
>>3339149
>There may be a proper closer to this episode posted within the next day or two, nothing terribly plot relevant, but something to end on besides a lewd scene. For now, though, I really need my sleep.
C-Catachresis family?
>>
>>3339149
Nighty night, OP.
>>
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Stats before I go. This was a shorter episode, but not by as much as I thought. It was the sparsest episode ever for character appearances, though.

CURRENT PROMINENCE BY MENTION:
Whitney: 764
Vivian: 475
Renee: 450
Cerise: 437
Rose: 322
Rose2: 227
Alex: 194
Kay: 125
Camelia/Amber: 126
Galatea: 117
Makoto: 108
Noelle: 88
Sable: 24
>>
>>3339149
Goodnight, OP.
As always, thank you for your work.
>>
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>>3339193
Heartless version.
>>
>>3339199
>>3339193
Thanks as always, OP!
>>
>>3339193
Quick question OP, will you be adding >>3335794 to the OP like you did with the wiki?
>>
>>3339193
Poor Rose...
>>
>>3339205
That's a good idea, and so yes, I will.

>>3339206
Soon. We're building to something! I can see a highly Rose-centric episode on the horizon.
>>
>>3339149
>>3339209
>I also agree that the newer girls need space to stretch out and shine as well
>I can see a highly Rose-centric episode on the horizon
Sasuga OP
>>
>>3339225
In a perfect world, all girls would receive an episode all about them and they would air simultaneously. I have to continually shift my focus as best I can, though -- but I'd like to think both statements can still be true!

In all honesty, I wanted to be done with season 3 by the end of the 13th episode. I am skeptical this will happen at the current pace. With as much as I want to do, I'm going to have to put my head down and just see where the story goes.
>>
>>3339225
Trust him, he has a plan
>>
>>3339230
Keep up the good work OP, I believe in you
>>
>>3339232
Ohhh man
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>>3339230

Just gotta wait for the VN adaptation.
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>>3339250
The unlockable Stackleford route is admittedly a bit of slog for those trying to get 100% clear, but conversely, the smut writing in the hidden "poor little white boy" route for Tyrus is some of OP Studios' best ever! I'm just joking.
>>
>>3339262
The sickness has gone to his head. We'll have to put him down.
>>
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>>3339262
>>
>>3339149
I will not spoil myself for the lewdness until I can "enjoy" it properly but all the rest is great as always. I especially liked seeing some interaction between Rose 1e and Vivian, characters that don't normally intersect are interesting.
>>
>>3336118
I actually kind of feel sorry for Noelle. If her superiors in FBI find out she had sex with a person of interest in the investigation of Darkbloom Analytics, her career is over.

And I'm not sure Alabaster Soliloquy is worth it.
>>
>>3338476
"We shall see about that," Vivian says, haughty. "I have already divested my holdings in salt companies, in anticipation of excess supply depressing prices."

BASED
>>
>>3339463
"For crimes against quiz bowl dorks everywhere," Whitney says, "I hereby sentence both of you to two hours' hard rape! Gavel gavel gavel."

"You can't just say gavel gavel gavel to imitate a gavel," you tell Whitney, glancing over.

"Well what the fuck sound should I make, then?"

"Bang bang bang?" Dr. Carte offers.

"That's a gun, ma."

"Doink doink?" You say. "Like on Law and Order."

"Yeah, sure. That really sets the mood. Doink doink. Great thinking, Ally, you fucking dweeb."

The dialogue for this quest is always so god damn perfect.
>>
>>3339452

As long as there isn't any DNA evidence, I'm sure it'll be fine. A child would be particularly hard to explain.
>>
>>3339501
With all the nakadashi that's been going on without any complications, I wouldn't be surprised if Alabaster's firing blanks
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>>3339501
Pregnancy bowl! Who are your picks?

> /csg/ chosen one apocalypse true end tier
Cerise
> Oh shit what are you doing/legacy tier
Whitney
Vivian
> Smug tier
Either or both Roses
> Very little change in story aside from shenanigans and surprise tier
Noelle
Kay
Makoto
> Tried and true tier
Renee
Mom
Mara
> Glitch in the Matrix tier
Sable
Amber
> Butts don’t work that way... or do they tier
Gal
Alex

Incidentally, is this what Darkbloom was talking about with Whitney?
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>>3339670
Well, if Whitney ever gets preggers, Fuck Quest will have its first official GILF in the harem.
>>
>>3339670
>pregnant alex

Now I'm not into mpreg, but I kind of want to see OP Studios pull that off.
>>
>>3339673
Double GILFed if you include mom. Though holding that over Mara would be pretty good.

So we haven’t seen Sable in a year. Is that part of the reason why?
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>>3339670
I think Darkbloom was warning Whitney about some fuckery with the implants. Or maybe he’s somehow aware Sable is still active and planning something. Either one would be things Alabaster would freak over and Whitney would want to keep him in the dark for now.

For preggobowl, I vote Rose. Seeing them argue over childcare methods and duties would be cute, CUTE!
>>
>>3339746
My working theory is that he may have warned Whitney about Diegesis, since something like that would be sure to set Ally in a tizzy.
>>
Fuck Quest 40,000 WHEN?

In the greasy darkness of the fuck future, there are only whores
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>>3339867
You mean Heretical Love Quest? It’s been done. You can find it on suptg.
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>>3339867
I'd be happy if we got a Fuck Quest 4 desu
>>
>>3339867
Space Marine Alabaster Soliloqus of the Cum Ravens chapter is kidnapped by dark eldar wytch R’ose Mal’ory. He struggles to understand what heretical hell he has been subjected to as she whips him for her own sadistic pleasure and understands even less when she then hands him the whip and says “your turn”

Thankfully he is rescued by the greenskin, Witnee.
>>
>>3339670
I really really really wanna see what would happen if Makoto gets preggers.
>>
>>3340094
Get Whitney pregnant and she'll follow soon after
>>
Ok but if our goal is to have the best babies made only from the strongest genetic stock, who should we knock up - and why? State your case.
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>>3340193
Rose2 for intelligence and taste!
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>>3335794
Goddamnit, I just noticed the Smatters tags

>Fluffy tail molestation
Kek
>>
>>3340201
Between the two of you, the kid's IQ might even be higher than sea level.

>>3340193
My vote goes to either Whitney or Rose

Whitney:
Pros
-The Smartest Girl in the Universe!
-Super /fit/
-genki as fuck
>Cons
>small breasts make breastfeeding difficult
>maternal leave for the CEO could spell bad things for the company

Rose:
Pros
-Intelligent in her own right
-Fiercely protective of those she loves
-Wide hips ensure easy childbirth, large breasts ensure proper nutrition for the child
>Cons
>Child will likely be soft and un/fit/, will survive the winter only with careful hibernation practices

Honorable mention goes to Renee
Pros
-Easy childbirth, proper nutrition for the same reasons as Rose
-has experience raising a child through Vivian, should be easier this time around without all the drama
-Super smart! Good genes for fitness!
>Cons
>more advanced age significantly increases the chance for the 'tism, and then we just wind up with Alabaster Jr.
>>
>>3340193
For a billionaire... all of them and see what happens.

For the story... Whitney or the Roses would be the funniest. Renee would fit very well too. Probably gonna have to go with both Roses at the same time.
>>
>>3340240
>Child will likely be soft
>Cons
You're not to good at this
>>
>>3340285
It's a downside if we're trying to genetically breed an army of ubermensch, Anonymous-dono.
>>
>>3340285
The child will be skinnyfat as fuck. All of Rose’s softness combined with Alabaster’s skinniness. Likely to be short too since Alabaster isn’t that tall and Rose is knee high to an ant.
>>
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>>3340292
I'd rather breed a bunch of cute and cuddly waifus than some gay ass muscle men. I mean what kind of soldier would want to harm a bunch of mini roses?

>>3340297
That's not how genes work anon...
>>
>>3340240
Small breasts don’t necessarily make breastfeeding difficult. For all we know, even Vivian could be the champion of lactating. Whitney-spawn would almost have to be Chad as a law of nature.
>>
>>3340424
>Whitney-spawn would almost have to be Chad as a law of nature.

This is an important point. Whitney is into parent-child incest, we don’t want to have our own kid cuck us. Better to have a brainy, short, frail beta with Vivian.
>>
>>3340457
>Better to have a brainy, short, frail beta with Vivian

Yeah, because Vivian is definitely showing how opposed she is to incest
>>
>>3340507
Vivian wants a domineering alpha to ravish her, like Alabaster, Whitney or Renee. She wouldn’t let her anemic child timidly paw at her pantaloons.
>>
>>3340522
And side note, saying this makes me realize that Vivian’s super-sub sex kink is most definitely her daddy issues at play. I don’t know how to feel about the fact that she wants us to hurt her lots and lots because darkbloom didn’t show her the affection she craved.
>>
>>3340544
We're gonna have to do what he couldn't then
>>
>>3340193
if we are only considering genetic factors, then Amber is the clear winner. While Sable and Vivian might be smarter, they are both turbo-artists. On the off chance this is due to genetic factors they can be discarded as candidates. Amber on the other hand is not autistic at all and capable of great, if terrible, things. She also has perhaps the highest pain tolerance of the cast.

Kay is runner up for her outstanding athletic ability combined with exceptional intellect and massive drive.
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>>3340457

If Ally's his own son, we've been cucking us from day one! Cucked in the grave(?)!
>>
>>3340602
>they are both turbo-artists
Well, good for them
>>
>>3340602
Amber is also insane, even by the regular cast’s standards, and in high school. I’d agree on Kay though. Added bonus for her of having a slightly more legitimate reason to be hanging around the company hq. She could also write those trashy huff post tier articles about her baby with a billionaire.
>>
>>3340811
>Amber is ... in high school
>im-fucking-plying

Even if she is actually attending classes at North High, it's all part of some sort of cover, it's gotta be. It physically doesn't make sense for her to actually be 17.

Ahh, we've been slice of lifing for so many episodes that I've fallen behind on my shadowruns.
>>
>>3340819
>Ahh, we've been slice of lifing for so many episodes that I've fallen behind on my shadowruns.
Yeah hasn't been any real plot progression for a while, just kind of been in the same place. I honestly don't know how this is gonna end in 13 episodes without it being rushed
>>
>>3340880
The worst part is that the plot probably has been progressing in some background way that OP's keeping hidden from us that we'll all look back on at the end of the season and feel fucking stupid for missing. Again. Mrgrgr.
>>
>>3340880
I wouldn’t mind it being drawn out for longer. Still need that beach episode. I’m curious about the implied time skipping. I want to assume that it’s more of a season 4 territory, but I could see it being the last few episodes if shit really starts going downhill soonish.
>>
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>>3340907
>beach episode
Verboten.
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>>3340811
first off, by Rose "rape" Mallory's standards Amber is, at best, a little squirrelly. She never hurt Alabaster in any way, just threatened him into compliance. And given that Alabaster is a self centered douche bag, threats are probably the easiest way to ensure his compliance. Certainly the funniest.

Secondly, she probably gets a bit of a pass for the eye searing total agony that was periodically forced on her. If you had to deal with migraines the size of the internet you would be a bit odd as well. Frankly it's a miracle she didn't go full murder-hobo-cyborg on all of DBA.

Kay also has a perfectly valid reason to be anywhere, HAAAAAAAAAHHH!
>>
>>3340240
A child raised by Rose would probably end up becoming some rainbow-haired antifa quadsexual demicripple
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>>3341147
Not if Alabaster is helping with the child-rearing. And let's be honest here, if Ally actually marries any of these girls, is he going to be anything but a stay-at-home dead? His job is literally "CEO's Boyfriend".
>>
>>3341164
>stay-at-home dad*
Whoops.
>>
>>3341164
A child raised by Alabaster wouldn't be much better, our only hope is if Mom helps
>>
>>3340891
I mean most of the important stuff is in clear view. Unlike last season where we were a fish out of water, we know most of what's happening. We have a relationship with a lot of key figures, we have Darkbloom under control for now, we know most of the going ons of DBA.

The only things we really don't know about are the Russains/Chinks and Sable. And at that point there really isn't any reason for us to feel stupid cause it's kind of impossible for us to know about it
>>
>>3341319
Isn't that just it, though? We don't know what we don't know. And we still only know enough to know that we don't know everything. It's been way too easy thus far, there's no way this peace lasts.
>>
>>3341164
>Alabaster
>Marrying the girl he got pregnant

the only way that happens is the constant threat of violence if he skips town. Alabaster is as likely to want a kid at this point as Amber is to embrace laissez-faire capitalism. to be fair, insofar as laissez-faire is an anti-corporate system which views Corporations as extensions of or replacements for the State one can make a case that Amber would support such a system under some conditions. We are however speaking not of traditional laissez-faire, but of the modern free market capitalism whose credos of greed at the expense of public welfare Amber likely finds noxious. Of course it may well be that the root of Ambers dissatisfaction with capitalism and fascination with communism lies directly in the ownership of the means of production, in which event any capitalist system is likely unsatisfactory to her. An interesting point of conversation might be the effects of surveillance capitalism.
>>
>>3341398
Usury was a mistake.
We should never have move beyond a barter-based economy.

Change my mind.
>>
>>3341147
>>3341164
>>3341168
A child raised by Rose and Ally would turn out one of two ways. Either they would be a 4 trillion IQ enlightened centrist or (more likely) a completely neurotic communazi basket case. Actually I’m gonna go for the big money here and say Pat I’d like to solve the puzzle: Camelia is their daughter from the future who went back in time to fix things + engineer the circumstances of her own birth. She had lots of interesting interactions with both of them going all the way back to season 2 ep 1.
>>
>>3341440
Oh no. We've come full circle.
>>
>>3341398
>Corporations as extensions of or replacements for the State
That's called Corporatism and it's also the basis of Fascist economics
>>
>Amber is Ally’s kid
Heh.
>>
>>3341449
Well, Corporations in the sense of corporate groups with common interests, not business enterprises, but they could definitely be interchangeable
>>
>>3341440
interesting, but unlikely. Amber was a young child when David ruined her life. Unless that was a lie. But then what happened to Vivian and Alabaster's memories?

>>3341405
Really? uh okay...

long story short a barter economy only supports a certain level of civilization before you need some form of fiat currency. Imagine trying to adequately compensate a software engineer whose program is used by millions, or making a donation to your favorite quest writer... it's not possible in a barter system. The means of exchange itself precludes it.
>>
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>>3341485
Currency is just intermediary barter, after all!

You want a haircut. But you're a cobbler, and the barber doesn't have any shoes he needs fixed in exchange for a haircut.

What he does want is milk. But the farmer doesn't need a haircut in exchange for the milk.

What the farmer wants is to get his worn-out shoes fixed. But you, the cobbler, don't need any milk right now in exchange for working on the farmer's shoes.

Everyone wants something the other produces, but none of you can barter for it directly.

So you fix the farmer's shoes, but instead of milk, he gives you money. You use this money to buy a haircut from the barber. And the barber uses the money to get his milk from the farmer.

Currency stores the value of labor so people can barter indirectly!

Then a gang of unruly bankers came by and wrecked up the place.

This post was made by Camelia Gang
>>
>>3341533
What are Camelia's thoughts on the JQ?
>>
>>3341533
>>3341485
Alright, I'm convinced. Currency in and of itself ain't bad. Fuck usury though.
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>>3341533
I would oy the fuck out of Camelia’s veys
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>>3341539
I don't know what she'd say if asked. Of course she toys with fringe ideologies of all kinds. But probably something snippy like asking in return who's looking for the final solution to the American question. (Honk if you love the Juche idea!)
>>
>>3341440
>Camelia is their daughter from the future who went back in time to fix things + engineer the circumstances of her own birth
That explain her complex motives.
>>
>>3341580
I can't wait to see more of this girl. She's all the right flavors of crazy.
>>
>>3341596
So she just has a daddy kink?
>>
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>>3335371
>Mizuryu Kei
>Good not great art
>Way more vanilla than it seems at first glance
>Aside from the raunchiness that tips over into the goofy for anyone used to hmanga
Perfect artist for a fag that thinks his power level is way higher than it is.
>>
>>3341580
What I find most interesting about Cam is that despite her rejection of mainstream American ideology, she's not actually the terrorist in training Alabaster describes her as. Not that she isn't plotting things mind you. But she's plotting against Darkbloom. Not America, not a political party, but a guy and his fucked up family.

And her motivation couldn't be more personal rather than ideological.

That having been said, big data does represent an especially troubling type of free market penetration into our lives. surveillance capitalism is something Camber would likely be violently opposed to.

And Sand Reckoner has the potential to make surveillance capitalism infinitely more dangerous to personal liberty than Facebook could ever be.

As a small sample imagine every conspiracy theory you've ever heard, from reptilian to flat earth and beyond. Most if not all of these fall flat when you realize the massive amount of work and resources required to pull them off. Some conspiracies would require almost everyone on the planet to be in on it in order for the man hours to be put in for them not to fall apart.

Sand Reckoner automates the manipulation of massive numbers of people. Thus making the impossible, possible.

Sable can't blow up those servers fast enough. Because it's either that, or we get used to chanting "God-emperor Vivian" Or Mara
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>>3341596
Sand Reckoner is basically mind hacking, right?
>>
>>3335371
>You're in your bedroom on Saturday enjoying some quality me-time with a Mizuryu Kei doujin when you hear a pelt against your window.

Hmmm.... was Alabaster reading the Souma Sousehold series?

The one with the slutty mom and her three slutty daughters?
>>
>>3342496
I’m more interested to know what Rose looks at during her turn of “me time”
>>
>>3342196

If aspiring for greater things meant Vivian being instated as god-emperor, I must admit that I'm now in full support of Darkbloom's past and future plans.
>>
>>3342736
Anon pls. We all know Cerise is the one true goddess.
>>
>>3340880
>I honestly don't know how this is gonna end in 13 episodes without it being rushed
You know what would fix that? Season 4
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>>3342736
I was honestly wondering about David's decision for Vivian to be president...
I would have thought she was far too autistic to appeal as a politician.
Whitney would probably resonate better with normal folks, especially once she gets the n word pass.
>>
>>3342196

I think you're hitting the nail squarely on the head in your interpretation of Camelia's character. She flirts with being a radical ideologue but it's obvious she has no cohesive view of politics or social structure. The totally incoherent worldview she projects is part of her schtick, and of course part of her charm. She's played at everything from Nazi to Posadist. But her beef is personal, and focused almost entirely on Darkbloom (for obvious reasons) and then, to a slightly lesser extent, Big Data in general.

Here's what I said of her at the end of season 2:

>(Question: What crazyhouse do I have to go to for a girl like her?)
>Just go back in time and find an old-school anarchist of the Emma Goldman "propaganda of the deed" variety. [...] I consider Camelia ultimately apolitical (in the sense that she doesn't care about the left-right divide or have a vision for what society should look like beyond destroying the primacy of Big Data and technological privacy-snooping), [but] she definitely looks a lot like those early 20th century radical bomb throwers who put the world into a lot of turmoil back then.

Or Camelia herself in S2E2:

>"This country is headed towards something big," she says. "Okay. We know that. And if that means gay space communism, fine. If it means a fourth reich, go nuts, I can't stop that. The only thing I want to make 100% goddamn certain of is that Mark fucking Zuckerberg won't have a say in it. Or Peter fucking Thiel. Or David FUCKING Darkbloom."
>>
>>3342887
She's so great.

Are you feeling better yet, OP? You ARE staying hydrated, right?
>>
>>3342768
L-let's not fly to close to the sun here, Anonymous-dono.

>>3342842
Reminder that David himself was also rumored to be planning a presidential bid. Setting up a dynasty would totally be up his alley, and of course he himself didn't realize how much of a sperg albeit an incredibly lovable one Vivian was turning out to be.

>>3342887
I was about to meme about "I want to burn down the system with Camelia! I really really want to!" in that classic style, but I thought of something even more amusing and topical.

At the end of Season 2, Darkbloom is dead, killed by Camelia, Whitney inherits it all, and we essentially become a key figure in "the system". But you also mentioned that if we had sent Vivian off to DC, it was very likely that Darkbloom would still be alive, and Camelia dead (or at least grievously wounded even more than originally let on). If we had sided with "they system" originally, is it conceivable Season 3 would have opened with us on the run from it, Sable style? A total reversal of the roles?

Maybe I should save that for the end of this run, but I'm still gonna pose it because it's a fun thing to think about.
>>
>>3343134
>I was about to meme about "I want to burn down the system with Camelia! I really really want to!"

What do you mean “meme”?
>>
>>3343355
The truth can sometimes be memetic, IaTM-kun.
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>>3342887
Camelia is cute!

Amber a shit!
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>>3342758
>Anon pls. We all know Cerise is the one true goddess.
What a shit Goddess
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>>3343810
>>3343785
You're a shit!
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>>3343813
Sorry you can't handle the truth anon
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>>3343813
Sorry, you cant handle the facts anon
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>>3343824
>>3343827
>>
>>3343824
>>3343827
>Homosexuals
>reading Fuck Quest
I really shouldn’t be surprised at this point
>>
>>3343834
>>3343863
I would never pray to such a stinky Goddess
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>>3343863
Why did you delete that post, it's exactly the same as >>3343870
>>
>>3343876

I want to prosthelytize the heathens! I really want to prosthelytize the heathens!
>>
>>3343134
>Reminder that David himself was also rumored to be planning a presidential bid. Setting up a dynasty would totally be up his alley,
>>
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>>3344071

I don't know, this implies that Rose would actually beat Ally in an election once, and we all know that would never happen.
>>
>>3344071
>implying David wouldn't engineer a disaster requiring the removal of term limits.
>>
>>3344071
>President Renee Denise Carte

What would her platform be? And how many times can I vote for her?
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>>3344071
Why wouldn't Viv win 2036?
>>
David is easily the emperor in a 40k scenario and alabaster is daddy issues horus.

The emperor did nothing wrong.
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>>3344071
>No El Presidente for Life Whitney
shiggy
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>>3336160
>as the Rose one from last year.
Link?
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>>3344342
Not him but here ya go

https://imgur.com/a/GG0FuF8
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>>3344345
Thank you.
>>
Daily reminder that Elon Musk is not only an anime protagonist but he also NTR'd Johnny Depp.
>>
>>3342887
for me the most fascinating change for Amber this season is presumably her release from intermittent agony.

I'm assuming that since her implant was linked to David's she either experienced nigh constant low level discomfort, or full on agony when he used diegesis

To paraphrase a different anon, I want to play Wii Fit with Amber! I really, really want to!

More to the point I want to see what drives her in the absence of revenge and pain. She clearly has other motivations, but we never spend enough time with her to find them out.

She also near certainly resurrected Scarlet. And what do we make of that? What do you say to someone who brought your mom back from the dead?
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>>3344673

"Darkbloom did nothing wrong."
>>
>>3344673
I'm still waiting for commie/fashy/nazbol t-shirt showoff with Amber/Camelia.
>tfw you will never have a nazbol gf to discuss the JQ while wearing matching tees
Why even live, anons?
>>
>>3344204
Keep drinking age as is, but reduce age of consent to 17 while raising age of legal marriage to 26.

>>3342887
>>3344782
Her aesthetic is so great, bros.
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>>3344725
Yes, yes he did
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>>3345061
Substantiate your claims
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>>3345378
This entire quest
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It only just dawned on me that Easter is also on 4/21 this year. Wew lads.
>>
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By the way I just learned today that Omaha is in Nebraska. You want to know who else is said to have lived in Omaha? That's right Smatters is the wife confirmed
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>>3345378
I can't believe someone posted a proofster in Fuck Quest in 2019. My day is made.
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>>3345895
Um.
Anonymous-dono, that's uh...

Nebraska is not Alaska.
>>
>>3345870
Oh shit, didn't even notice that
>>
>>3345870
>>3345895
The lore deepens
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>>3345901
Fuck me, I remembered wrong...
>>
>>3345895
The only girl that is based enough to give us a child.
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>>3346321
Or six, as it were.
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>>3346326
6 times the based
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>>3339149
>There may be a proper closer to this episode posted within the next day or two, nothing terribly plot relevant, but something to end on besides a lewd scene. For now, though, I really need my sleep.
Uhhh, are you not doing this anymore?
>>
>>3348730
"May" also means "may not".
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>>3348909
I know, that's why I was asking for clarification
>>
>Boku no StuCo
Ohhh man.
>>
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>>3349279
It's safe to assume that that's the Rose episode

So I'm officially hype
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>>3343134
>Reminder that David himself was also rumored to be planning a presidential bid. Setting up a dynasty would totally be up his alley, and of course he himself didn't realize how much of a sperg albeit an incredibly lovable one Vivian was turning out to be.

This is a big blind spot David had about his daughter, sort of alluded to in the flashback at the beginning of this episode. He put expectations on her to be more than she was. I think he legitimately believed she would be capable of doing anything he told her to.

What he never apprehended was that she had a lot of "normal" interests too (for example, as a little girl, how she could be motivated by sweets) -- and normal weaknesses too (not good with people).

He put her on a pedestal and imagined her to be without any flaws. And he saw Whitney much the same, too. Consider how he reacted to her in season 1 when they ate together.

As for your question, I can't really answer right now.

>>3344071
pffft.

>>3344673
>To paraphrase a different anon, I want to play Wii Fit with Amber! I really, really want to!

Just imagine how she plays the bowling game! Reeling back and running up to the screen and moving her body as if actually bowling -- complete with follow-through and holding the pose (+ a little wobble) when she releases the ball. Tilting to one side trying to will the ball to veer towards the center of the lane.

---

To those who were asking about how I'm feeling, no need to worry, I'm over my cold. Looking forward to hijinks on Saturday!
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>>3349732
Yayifications~!
>>
>>3349732
>Just imagine how she plays the bowling game!
Amber is CUTE! C U T E !

Glad to know you're all better, OP.
>>
As great as Amber is, another girl has my heart.
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>>3349769
I know right, isn't Rose great!?
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>>3349790
Looks like you made a silly mistake there anon, I think you're talking about the wrong Rose!
The Rose you posted is a lying, stalking, rapist, good for nothing BITCH who claims to be politically correct and inclusive in order to dishonestly keep as much power as she can! Whoops!
Lucky for you, I have the right Rose right here. Isn't she adorable? She's even good at baking cookies, even though your Rose is TERRIBLE at it and needs to resort to petty theft in order to give valentine's cookies to the boy she abuses and harasses daily.
Meanwhile MY Rose is a ball of sunshine whose love is the most pure, who is willing to go to ANY lengths to make her man happy, and loves him with every ounce of her adorable being! Sure is nicer than a FILTHY NASTY SKANKY SLUT WHO'S ONLY IN LOVE WITH GETTING RAPED.
>>
I feel like 3 of the girls on the counter are superfluous to the story, and just take up the quest's limited surface area. I wish they weren't around.
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>>3349810
Which three are you talking about?
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>>3349769
>00:42:21
Begone, Rose, you foul demon.
>>
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>>3349807
Please remind me, who is Alabaster's number 1 Rose? That's right you're looking right at her
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>>3349813
Noelle, Rose2, and Kay. Kay is half relevant because she snoops and has an agenda but she still feels tangential. Honestly I can't imagine anyone caring about Noelle if she weren't on the counter and an obvious fetish bait for the players. Rose2 was also clearly designed to be annoying and superfluous, is introduced too late for the Yandere surprise to pay off, and only exists due to fanservice for people who read FQ1.
>>
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>>3349815
>>3349807
>>3349790
>>3349769
Amazing how lowly the opinions of the plebeians can be sometimes.
>>
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>>3349732

It's good you're feeling better, OP. Although, your implication that Whitney may not, in fact, be the smartest girl in the universe may indicate lingering fever delirium.
>>
>>3349816
Rose2 offers great boons to the story. She's like a Fazil we get to see more often!
Meanwhile Rose1 is just a bitch.
>>
>>3349816
>Rose2
Fuck you, fight me. She's cute and funny and that's all that matters! I do agree that Noelle and Kay are kind of awkwardly in the middle between relevance and irrelevance. Also I'm very surprised you didn't list Makoto, all she contributes is like 2 lines of dialogue and then fades into the background of most of her scenes. OP didn't even care enough to put her on the chart yet
>>
>>3349816

Noelle has some character overlap with Kay, but even though I didn't like her last season for being an obvious trap (the bad kind), she really turned around for me after the Valentine's scene. Rose2 is relatively more unique and allows for some entertaining character dynamics. A bumbling yandere is a pretty rare archetype that probably doesn't need to follow the shock value conventions of the standard model.
>>
>>3349816
Kay is right, Noelle suffers from Kay syndrome in that we've taken too long to actually get to speak to and interact with her deeply. Rose2 is where you're super wrong though. Yeah, she was initially put in for the meme, but we liked her so much OP made her an actual character and there's still a lot of background shit we don't know surrounding her seeing as she literally only started existing a few months ago. The yandere thing is something else, she's too dumb to be able to hide it or act on it effectively. It was never meant to be a surprise. We suspected it early on, and it was eventually confirmed, but only due to her own obvious behavior and being utterly retarded.
>>
>>3349816
It’s like you haven’t, or perhaps cannot read.

>Kay
Was hugely influential last season, having literally drawn us a fucking chart about what was going on. She was also a major driving force behind the trip into the desert, and reconnecting with Dr. Carte. This season she has been full of epic banter, excellent tennis skills, and surprising virginity. I fully expect her to fuck Ally in every pose of the Kama Sutra now that her switch has been flipped. Made Mara blanche. Is wow as hell.

>Rose2
I trust OPStudios.

>Noelle
Is going to be crucial. That witness protection offer is some heavy foreshadowing. Why the fuck do you think we end up in Alaska?
>>
>>3350026
Threadly reminder that Alex also starts with "al-"
>>
>>3350026
>>3350044
Alaska also starts with "Al-".

You know what else?

Alabasterina
>>
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>>3350044

If Alabaster wants to be the wife in his marriage with Alex, we should support his wishes.
>>
>>3350044
What

Absolute madman
>>
>>3350045
I was referring to when the POV character's wife started to say their name.
>>
>>3349844
I had loterslly completely forgot Makoto existed. Put her on the list too.
>>
>>3350026
>Kay
>Hardly there for most of the season
>Makes chart
>Drives us to the dessert
>Hugely influential
The chart didn't teach us anything it was intended to be a recap of events, the only thing she really did do was the dessert trip and that role probably could've have been filled by another character
>>
>>3350549
>confirmed the existence of Renee Denise Carte and her attachment to the happenings around us, giving us a reason to go on the road trip in the first place
>confirmed Noelle's status as an FBI Agent in the first place, and the fact that we were all on her shitlist
>introduced us to the word Catachresis in relation to Camelia

But the chart was just a recap. Sure. Okay.
>>
>>3350549

She improved the Rose scene through voyeurism.
>>
>>3350561
>confirmed the existence of Renee Denise Carte and her attachment to the happenings around us, giving us a reason to go on the road trip in the first place
You had to be braindead not to think that she was alive and involved with in the plot in some way

>confirmed Noelle's status as an FBI Agent in the first place, and the fact that we were all on her shitlist
We already speculated that, it was just confirmed with the chart

>introduced us to the word Catachresis in relation to Camelia
I mean sure? It didn't lead to anay realization, it was more just foreshadowing than anything else

>>3350662
I have to say that's a pretty convincing argument anon
>>
>>3350694
>you need to be alive and not braindead---

Stop right there, Anonymous-dono. Us knowing based on meta-knowledge is completely irrelevant. In-character knowledge is a thing.
>>
>>3350044
Alex marries Sable and runs away to Alaska while the rest of the cast or the Russians hunt them down.

Alex has been getting start of episode vingettes, exactly like the Alaska scene.

Alex's new persona neatly fits the changed dynamic present in the Alaska scene. Including the bit about old habits.

OP structured it in such a way that it could be Alex, or Ally.

Alex might well take Noelle up on witness protection for himself and Sable to escape Maria's anger.
>>
>>3350937
A third theory arises:
The Alaska scene is an alternate reality where we initially sided with Darkbloom, Whitney never finds out her bloodline (or does under incredibly different, and somehow more harrowing, circumstances), and we live our lives in constant escape from the retaliation of our part in his attempted murder. A peek into the darkest timeline, if you will.
>>
>>3350694
Face it, Kay is and was very plot relevant.

Rose2 and Makoto are the only characters that haven't yet been relevant to the plot.

>Makoto dedicates herself to lesbian rape.
>exhausts the rape possibilities with the regular cast
>everywhere I go I must rape
>wait! a female Whitney hasn't raped!
>I don't know this is a bad idea!
>Makoto rapes Mara.
>yfw
>>
>>3350949
except that's not how that would have gone down. David seemed oddly chill about the whole trying to kill him thing, and even intended Camelia to be a powerful part of his new world order.

plus there haven't been any time travel or alternate universe shenanigans save for the VR world.
>>
>>3350788
Even with the chart the character's still didn't do anything with most of It. Nobody in the story acted on the knowledge that Noelle was a spy or that there was mention of Catacheresis. The only thing we did act on was the knowledge of Renee. So I guess you're right, Kay does have a role in the story, she exists to tell us about someone who is much more important than her. Wow hugely influential is right
>>
>>3351994
technically speaking none of the characters are as influential as Alabaster because his choices define the narrative.

By your logic you could make a convincing case for any character being irrelevant. When anon point out Kay's very real and relevant contributions you just aver that any character could have filled that role. By that logic Rose Mallory is utterly useless to the cast and could be replaced by any rape hole. Hell why bother naming characters? Alabaster can just wander through an endless gallery of palette swapped generic females identified only by fetish and code letter.

>IncestA_blue best girl
>>
>>3352064
I wasn't arguing that any character could fulfil her role there anon, I was arguing that her actions weren't all that influential other than informing us of the existence of a more important character. If during the last scene Makoto told us about some macguffin after being basically absent from the entire story I wouldn't call her hugely influential to the story even if I like her
>>
>>3352094
This is our birthday boy for today. Say something nice about him
>>
>>3352189
His butt is very cute!
>>
>>3352375
L-lewd
>>
>>3352189
his back end skills are second to none.
>>
>>3352189
I bet that for all the hard use he's put though he's also great at cuddling!
>>
Life imitates art.
>>
>>3354394
Holy shit is this actually happening? Is it the season 2 studio?
>>
>>3354571
No studio info yet, the announcement just mentions s3
>>
I can't believe it's almost time again.
>>
Going to sleep now, this timezone difference sucks for FQ purposes...

Don't go getting us killed now guys~
>>
The time is near gentlemen
>>
>>3355473
Can it be near me instead?
>>
>>3355485
>>3355485
>>3355485



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