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>>2851900
Last time on Saiyan Conqueror Quest:

You and Meloka threw nearly everything you had at the Arbiter, but he was still standing. Before he could end either of you, however, the Supreme Kai arrived. Declaring the battle over, he ordered the Arbiter to take his forces and return to High Charity, where he and his masters would face the Supreme Kai’s judgement. The day after the battle’s finish you spoke with the Guardian and learned more about this new power you’d unlocked, becoming the Champion of New Salda. After learning more of your new form you then met with Freeza, where you declared you’d challenge the Arbiter to a one-on-one match for what he did. Freeza, knowing that Truth and the other Prophets would throw the Arbiter under the bus to protect themselves anyway, agreed to this plan. He telepathically sent your plan to the Supreme Kai, who said it was legal within the peace treaty. As we rejoin Karn, Freeza has just finished telepathically speaking with the Supreme Kai and now turns back to you.

“You never slow down, do you Karn?” Freeza asks you with a chuckle. “I was going to speak with Vox anyways, once the dust had settled a bit more. But I suppose I’ll go ahead and meet with that bastard now. You’re welcome to come sit in on this meeting if you want, of course. I’m sure he’ll have plenty to say of you as well. Unless you have something more urgent to handle?”

Well?
>Go with Freeza to his ship, meet with Gleeman Vox
>Go with Freeza to his ship, but check up with the Ginyu Force
>Check up on Tatsu, see how he’s holding up
>Visit King Vegeta, see if he could use your help
>Find Raven, see how she’s holding up
>Check up on Nappa, Turles, and the other wounded Saiyans
>Find Turles, Koriand’r, and Komand’r, see how they’re holding up
>Go get Meloka then go visit and name your twins
>There are still Covenant soldiers trapped at the bottom of the seas, you need to do something with them
>Other(write in)
30 minute vote

>Go with Freeza to his ship, but check up with the Ginyu Force
i wanna have a guys night out with the ginyu force and the bros to celebrate!

>>2851903
>Go with Freeza to his ship, but check up with the Ginyu Force
Fuck yeah, the ginyus!

There'll be plenty of time to talk to the others after this, but we'll miss out on this if we don't do it right now
Plus there might be some important details we would want to tweak

>>2851938
A guy's night out with the ginyus sounds pretty great desu, but that should be an "in the background" sort of thing. Something mentioned offhand rather than written out in it's entirety.

Leaving vote open another ten minutes or so, get a few more responses before I tally votes

>>2851961
That said, it *could* make a great omake!

>>2851903
>Go with Freeza to his ship, meet with Gleeman Vox

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>>2851938
>>2851961
Check up with the Ginyu Force wins it. Writing.

>>2851998
Did you know that statistically, hanging out with the ginyu force is more popular than *not* hanging out with the ginyu force?

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>>2851903
>>2851903
“I think I’m gonna check up on a few other things instead.” you reply, the two of you flying off towards his ship together. “First I’ll check up on the Ginyu Force, see how they fared.”
“Very well. If he says anything important I’ll let you know.” Freeza says, tapping the side of his head. You then arrive to his ship, you both walking inside then going your seperate ways. Freeza goes towards the bridge while you go towards his Medical Bay, where you can sense the Ginyu Force are assembled. Walking in you see Burter, Recoome and Jeice all covered in bandages with their backs to you, watching Captain Ginyu and Guldo in the ship’s two Healing Pods. The three turn when they hear the door open, seeing you walk in.

“Oi, hey Karn.” Jeice says, the trio looking worn down. “Made it through aright, didja?”
“Yeah, what happened to them?” you ask, nodding to the captain and Guldo.
“They didn’t much like the capt’n havin’ one of their mate’s bodies, and tried hard to take ‘em out.” Jeice says. “Guldo was givin’ ‘em ‘ell, watchin’ out for us and keepin’ anything from hurtin’ us. They started payin’ the little guy more an’ more attention, and eventually overwhelmed ‘em.”
“He took a blade meant for me, brave little guy.” Recoome says, sad.
“After Guldo went down I ran him into the ship, but everything went to shit fast.” Burter says. “We all got roughed up quite a bit, but the Captain got the worst of it. He tried to hold the line and keep morale up, but we were getting overwhelmed. If it wasn’t for that Super Saiyan in the dark armor, we’d have all been killed.”
“Turles?” you ask yourself out loud, then remember they probably don’t know him. “I’ll let him know for you all. So what’s next for you guys?”

“The boss said we’d all get some time off after all this.” Recoome says. “I’m looking forward to going back home for some time to unwind.”
“Same, mate.” Jeice says, smiling wistfully. “Gonna go home to me shiela, enjoy some quality time home with the missus. What about you, Karn? Any big plans now that this is all over?”
cont

>>2852117
>turles saved the ginyu force
Fuck, we owe him one.

Can we give guldo and ginyu some super saiyan energy through the healing pods?

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>>2852117
“It’s not over yet.” you reply, the three Ginyu Force members freezing, turning slowly towards you. “There’s one more thing I have to do.”
“One more?” Jeice asks, confused. “What do you mean, mate? The battle’s over, the Supreme Kai himself said so!”
“The battle’s over, but the Arbiter got away.” you reply. “Lord Freeza’s speaking with Vox now. You guys gotta keep this quiet for now, but soon I’ll be calling the Arbiter out for a duel. To the death. He’s gonna pay for what his people did here.”
“Karn, are you out of your mind?” Recoome asks, sounding concerned. “We heard what happened, if the Supreme Kai hadn’t shown up you and Meloka would have been killed. And now you’re gonna take him on alone?”

“I was exhausted and he got lucky.” you reply, slightly heatedly. “If I hadn’t been fighting for several hours at that point, I’d have torn him apart. Now instead I’m going to destroy him when he’s all alone. No soldiers to hide behind, no one to stop the fight, and nowhere to run! He’ll pay for all the blood his people spilt here!”
“Well mate, if you’re sure about this.” Jeice says, clearly not sure. “We’ll be rooting for ya! Don’t worry ‘bout Guldo and the capt’n, we’ll let them know you came by to check on us.”

You say your goodbyes to the Ginyu Force and leave them, walking through the halls of Freeza’s ship. The day is still young, and you have plenty you can do.

But what will you do now?
>Go to Freeza and meet with Gleeman Vox
>Check up on Tatsu, see how he’s holding up
>Visit King Vegeta, see if he could use your help
>Find Raven, see how she’s holding up
>Check up on Nappa, Turles, and the other wounded Saiyans
>Find Turles, Koriand’r, and Komand’r, see how they’re doing
>Go get Meloka then go visit and name your twins
>There are still Covenant soldiers trapped at the bottom of the seas, you need to do something with them
>Other(write in)
30 minute vote

>>2852158
>Go to Freeza and meet with Gleeman Vox
We can check up on tatsu after this

>>2852158
>Find Raven, see how she’s holding up
>There are still Covenant soldiers trapped at the bottom of the seas, you need to do something with them

>>2852158
>>Other(write in)
See if any of the nascent super saiyans survived.

>>2852158
also, i guess...
Maybe we should save those poor bastards at the bottom of the ocean.
I mean, they don't really deserve that kind of death, they're just a bunch of grunts.

>>2852160
I'll switch my vote to
>There are still Covenant soldiers trapped at the bottom of the seas, you need to do something with them

>>2852158
>>There are still Covenant soldiers trapped at the bottom of the seas, you need to do something with them

>>2852158
>There are still Covenant soldiers trapped at the bottom of the seas, you need to do something with them

>>2852158
>There are still Covenant soldiers trapped at the bottom of the seas, you need to do something with them

Rolled 7, 71, 43, 97, 30 = 248 (5d100)

>>2852160
>>2852162
>>2852170
>>2852172
>>2852182
>>2852208
>>2852246
Looks like getting the Covenant soldiers wins it. Roll me a 2d100.

Rolled 85, 33 = 118 (2d100)

>>2852253

Rolled 13, 73 = 86 (2d100)

>>2852253

Rolled 94, 65 = 159 (2d100)

>>2852253

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>>2852259
>>2852271
>>2852273
94/100, 73/100. Impressive work, writing.

Apologies for the slow update speeds this weekend, last three days at this part-time job before the other one is full-time.

>>2852425
Its cool, had the same problem before I quit my first job.

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>>2852158
As you walk through the halls of Freeza’s ship, you ponder your next move. Extending your senses, you can feel many of your allies nearby. But you also sense the Covenant soldiers trapped beneath the waves of New Salda’s seas. For a moment you remember their terror you’d felt, feeling a pang of sympathy for the trapped soldiers. They were just following orders. You walk out of Freeza’s flagship and lift up into the air, taking off towards the largest group of Covenant powerlevels. You quickly leave the landmass behind, flying out over the ocean and closing in to the powers. Once you feel that you’re above the downed ship you transform into a Super Saiyan, take a deep breath, then dive.

You dive down beneath the waves, quickly descending deeper and deeper. You feel the pressure building, thankful for your high-intensity training. If you hadn’t been training in gravity like this, you’d surely have given up. But you press on, the light disappearing as you dive even deeper. Without being able to use your eyes, you have to rely on your ki sense to navigate. You quickly find the first ship in the inky depths, your hand brushing the ship’s hull. You dig your fists into the ship, and begin trying to haul it to the surface. To your surprise, however, it doesn’t move. You try again, but get the same results. As you are, you don’t have the strength to move the waterlogged ship out of this crushing pressure. You need more power if you want to haul them out of here. But do you want to?

Well?
>Ascend, keep trying to pull them out
>Death Slash and cut the ship up, try and bring just the parts with living Covenant still inside up
>Energy Bomb, mercy kill them all and move on
>Scatter Beams, punch holes in the ship to let the water drown them all
>Other(write in)
30 minute vote

>Ascend, keep trying to pull them out
>Some kind of energy binding maybe?

>>2852472
>Ascend, keep trying to pull them out

>>2852472
>Ascend, keep trying to pull them out
>Get under the ship and try pushing up from that side

>>2852472
>>Ascend, keep trying to pull them out

Extending the vote, I won’t be back for around 50ish minutes.

>>2852472
>Ascend, keep trying to pull them out

>>2852472
>Ascend, keep trying to pull them out
Putting any holes in the ship at this depth with new salda's size and gravity will crumple it for sure

That armor is the only thing keeping them alive

>>2852506
This, just push our body through the rock and sand to get under it if we need to.
Rock is like warm butter at this point.

>>2852472
>Ascend, keep trying to pull them out
Getting these guys out and back to High Charity makes us look extra good to the Kais, plus the stories that would come from this are gonna confuse the shit out of the Covenant.

>>2852707
>stories

>WE, THE PROPHETS HAVE USED OUR MOST HOLY POWERS TO SAVE OUR TRAPPED SOLDIERS ON THE FILTHY SAIYAN PLANET!

You act like there is a shred of truthful information in the covenant. The only ones I'd count on knowing shit are incredibly old veterans, arbiters, and the prophets.

>>2852484
>>2852498
>>2852506
>>2852535
>>2852543
>>2852618
>>2852707
Ascend, keep trying to pull them out wins it. Roll me a d100.
DC 45

Rolled 89 (1d100)

>>2852741

>>2852739
The Kig-Yar and the Unggoy know some shit.
The former is incredibly disloyal and the other almost tore the covenant apart at one point.

Rolled 98 (1d100)

>>2852741

Rolled 83 (1d100)

>>2852741

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>>2852743
>>2852750
>>2852752
it was meant to be

>>2852743
>>2852750
Off to a pretty good start.

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>>2852743
>>2852750
>>2852752
98/100. Great success, writing.

>>2852750
>>2852752
>>2852743
Nice, they might call us their new god though

>>2852769
>implying that's a bad thing

>>2852769
Consider the following

>you're blown out of the sky by insane saiyan berserkers with god-like powers beyond all reason
>you sink to the bottom of the ocean and are "lucky" enough to not be crushed under the massive weight of this high-gravity world's oceans
>now the air's running out and everyone shit themselves, tainting what remained
>suddenly the ship begins to rock as something knock into it
>is it some giant sea life? are we about to die?
>no, the hull pressure gauge reads lower and lower, we're getting pulled up
>the covenant must have come to save us after winning the war! praise be!
>the ship is rocked heavily as it sets down on the surface, then suddenly the hull is torn open
>it's a saiyan, glowing with pure energy
>he ripped the battleship's hull apart with his bare hands just to walk inside
>it's fucking karn
>suddenly we wish we'd just been crushed
>not only are the saiyans not dead, now we're at their mercy
>my fear has never reached such heights
>"Are you guys alright? War's over, i'm here to help."
>his words seem tinged with worry, but all i see is his silver tongue dripping with venom
>what stands before me is nothing less than a true demon

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>>2852472
You are not giving up yet! In a burst of power you Ascend, blasting around the ship and down into the ground beneath it. You cut a path through the ocean bottom easily enough, keeping one hand on the ship to avoid losing your way. Once you feel that you’re roughly underneath the warship, you place both hands on the ship’s hull, and push. You feel the hull buckle underneath your hands, your hands sinking into the metal as it begins to give. But then you feel it. Like breaking an airtight seal you feel the ground’s hold on the ship give, you’ve broken it loose! You push even harder, blasting up out of the ground and rising up through the depths. Your eyes begin adjusting as you start seeing daylight, you’re almost there! With one last burst of strength you power through the seawater, erupting from the depths and holding the ship above you. You carry the partially-broken Covenant warship to the nearest shore, setting the broken vessel down in the sand and catching your breath.

“Horray! The battle is won, we’re sav.... Oh...” one of the Kig-Yar says, his excitement vanishing as the massive hangar doors opens and he sees you standing there. He’d clearly been expecting other Covenant forces to have saved him, not you. “So it would seem we’re not saved after all. By you being here, I can only assume we’ve lost. Since you didn’t leave us at the bottom of the ocean, I’d assume you’re not here to kill us. Prisoners, then? Slaves? Or will you just torture the lot of us for information or amusement?”
“The battle’s over, you lost.” you reply, then sigh. “But you guys were just doing your job. I couldn’t just let you die like that. Stay here for now, I’m going back for the others.”
“Wait, there are others?” he asks, but instead of answering you take back off over the ocean. You sense far fewer of the Covenant alive now, only one other cluster of powerlevels still there. The other three groups have vanished from your senses, either crushed or drowned beneath the waves. Moving quickly you zero in on the last group, again diving down into the inky depths. This ship is far easier to move than the other, you hauling it back to the surface with ease where you notice it is only half a ship. This one seems to have been sliced clean in two, perhaps your own handiwork? You set the half of a ship down beside the first, a few hundred of the Kig-Yar now standing on the beach and watching you, confused. You greet the new crew much the same as the first, elation turning to disappointment, then confusion. The remaining leaders of both ships, which were surprisingly all Kig-Yar, look to you questioningly.

You saved many of them. But what now?
>Ask King Vegeta what to do with them
>Tell them to try and fix their ship, then leave and never return
>Tell them to call the other Kig-Yar to pick them up, then their tech is forfeit
>They’re on their own from here, not your problem
>Other(write in)
30 minute vote

>>2853039
>Tell them to try and fix their ship, then leave and never return

>>2853039
>Tell them to try and fix their ship, then leave and never return
Normally I'd go with Vegeta, but there's no guarantee he'd let them live.

>>2853039
>Ask King Vegeta what to do with them
>Ask Freeza if he has any ideas too
>Tell the pirates they may survive long enough to work for us
>Misbehave and we splatter them though

>>2853039
>>Tell them to call the other Kig-Yar to pick them up, then their tech is forfeit
Keep their stuff, use it to make shinier stuff!

>>2853039
>Ask King Vegeta what to do with them
Imply they could work their debt off and their children can join our nation?
First step toward King vegeta becoming mandalor?

>>2853039
>Tell them to try and fix their ship, then leave and never return

>>2853039
>>Ask King Vegeta what to do with them

>>2853042
>>2853049
>>2853057
>>2853062
>>2853072
>>2853100
>>2853142
Seems we’ve got ourselves a tie. I’m leaving the vote open another ten minutes before I roll for a tiebreaker.

>>2853155
>Ask King Vegeta what to do with them

>>2853072
>>2853142
Switching my vote to;
>Ask King Vegeta what to do with them

>>2853039
>Ask King Vegeta what to do with them

Rolled 63, 99, 17 = 179 (3d100)

>>2853155
>>2853172
>>2853177
>>2853196
Asking King Vegeta what to do with them wins. Interesting.

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>>2853206
>that 99

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>>2853206
That 99 indeed. Writing.

>>2853206
What the hell is that 99 for and who is about to get their shit pushed in?

>>2853226
I'm more concerned about that 17 desu

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>>2853039
“We’ll see what the king has to say about this.” you tell them, reaching for your Scouter. Before you can open the radio on it, however, the first Kig-Yar to emerge interrupts.
“Wait, the Saiyan King Vegeta?” he asks you. “You’d put our lives in the hands of that, that that boy?”
“I wouldn’t call him that, if I were you.” you reply, then open the radio line. “King Vegeta, can you hear me?”
“Karn? What are you-“ he says, then you can hear him start in surprise. “What the hell’s going on? When did all those Covenant get there? I’m on my-“
“Relax, they’ve surrendered.” you reply with a chuckle, sensing Vegeta’s ki exploding up as he Ascends as well. “I pulled their broken ships up from the bottom of the ocean, they’re done fighting. What should I do with them?”

“Just get rid of th- Wait, no.” Vegeta says, you almost feeling the gears turning in his mind. “Tell them to wait there at their ships, and I will be there myself shortly to discuss the terms of their surrender. If they try to run off, or Kais forbid attack, they’ll be hunted down and killed.”
“What are you planning in that devious brain of yours?” you ask, hearing Vegeta smirk.
“You’ll see soon enough yourself, Karn.” he replies, a teasing edge to his voice. You know he’s enjoying you not knowing his plan. You’ll get him back for that later, somehow.
“Got it, will do.” you reply, closing out the comms. You then turn your attention back to the Kig-Yar, all looking curiously to you. “Good news, the king himself is coming to discuss your surrender. He said for you all to wair here by your ships until his arrival. Any who try to fight or run will be killed on the spot. Understood?”

“Ar-Are we to be spared, then?” their leader asks you tentatively. “We’re actually going to leave this world?”
“The king didn’t tell me his plans.” you reply, seeing the confusion on many of their faces. Perhaps they thought that he was only a figurehead, or your proxy. “But he only threatened to kill you if you attack or flee. So if I were you all, I’d wait here patiently like he ordered.”
“What about you, great and powerful demon?” one asks. Demon? “Will you remain here watching over us until your king’s arrival?”

Well?
>Yes, wait for King Vegeta
>No, do something else

If no, then what?
>Go to Freeza and meet with Gleeman Vox
>Check up on Tatsu, see how he’s holding up
>Find Raven, see how she’s holding up
>Check up on Nappa, Turles, and the other wounded Saiyans
>Find Turles, Koriand’r, and Komand’r, see how they’re doing
>Go get Meloka then go visit and name your twins
>Other(write in)
30 minute vote

>>2853357
>Yes, wait for King Vegeta
I want to be here.

>>2853357
>Yes, wait for King Vegeta
We got time

>>2853357
>>Yes, wait for King Vegeta

>>2853357
>Yes, wait for King Vegeta

I suppose we could also try talking to them. Ask them a bit about what they do and why they're calling us a demon. Get some insight into how Covvie society works and try to see if Freeza can work that to his advantage somehow.

>>2853391
This too

>>2853391
I think the fact that we've slaughtered millions, possibly even billions, at this point, of Covenant soldiers personally, and severely injured their leader, the Arbiter, multiple times miiiight have something to do with their calling us a demon.

>>2853357
>Yes, wait for King Vegeta

>>2853357
>>2853391
this

>>2853405

Probably and possibly. But if they're a chatty bunch, there is a chance (however remote) that they might volunteer some information that might just prove to be useful. The last time I read up on Halo lore, Jackals/Kig-Yar are more hired muscle and are less into the whole religious fervor thing than the rest of the Covenant. They might be able to provide some perspective that isn't overtly colored by fanatacism.

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>>2853368
>>2853374
>>2853376
>>2853391
>>2853400
>>2853406
>>2853418
Wait for King Vegeta wins it. Writing.

>>2853357
>>Yes, wait for King Vegeta

>>2853496
I look forward to these pirates meeting his kids, and how scary strong they are, before going back. Or whatever Vegeta has planned. They would be scared shitless at the fact Karn has kids that are going to be stronger than him, I want to see the reaction when they tell others the fact Karn's kids are strong enough to rip their ships in have.

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>>2853357
“I don’t have to.” you reply, sighing out and reverting back to your base form. “But I may as well. Most of the others probably wouldn’t hesitate to kill you all right now.”
“But why?” one of the others asks. “Why did you save us? We came here to kill you all. Why would you go this far to save us?”
“It’s nothing I haven’t done myself.” you say, sitting down on a nearby rock. “I’ve been doing the same thing for about a decade now. I’ve slaughtered dozens of planets on the orders of others. And this fight’s over. No point in just sla-

“DADDY!!” you hear Chaya call out, you rising and turning towards her voice. You watch as she flies headlong at you; Meloka, Broly, and Chilli all following close behind. You hold out your arms as Chaya rockets right towards you, bracing for impact. She slams hard into your chest, and despite you bracing for it you still slide back a foot or two in the sand.
“Mornin’ kiddo.” you say, smiling and ruffling her hair with your right hand . “Sleep good?”
“Yeah!” she says excitedly over the Kig-Yars’ murmers. “But when I woke up, you weren’t home.”
“Sorry about that Chaya, had some things to take care of this morning.” you say, Meloka and the boys landing right by you. You say this loud enough for Meloka to hear, you can tell she’s wary of these Covenant around, a heartbeat away from transforming. “Did you behave yourself while me and your mother were fighting?”
“Yeah!” she shouts, full of energy as she bounces in your arms. “Me an’ Raditz fought again, an’ I won!”
“Really? Good job Chaya.” you say, her absolutely beaming as King Vegeta arrives. He lands near you all, two dozen of the royal guard surrounding him and looking angrily at the Kig Yar. You also notice another four of them carrying communication gear, oddly enough. “Ah, King Vegeta. Good morning, your highness.”

“Morning, General Karn.” he replies formally, nodding to you then switching to telepathic communication. “I’ll handle this myself, returning these Kig-Yar to Eayn without involving the Covenant at all would certainly help improve the PTO’s relations with these merchants. I’ll take care of this myself, no offense but this situation needs a more diplomatic touch.”
“Of course, King Vegeta.” you say out loud, bowing at the waist. Chaya giggles as you swing her downward, then rise back upright. “I’ll leave them to you.”

You lift up into the air, still holding onto Chaya whose squirming restlessly in your arms. Meloka, Broly and Chilli all follow you into the air, Meloka looking questioningly to you.
“What was that about?” Broly asks, you turning to your adopted son. “Aren’t they the bad guys?”
cont

>>2853720
>“Aren’t they the bad guys?”
Fully explaining the depth of the concept of conflicting perspectives and beliefs to Broly sounds like a difficult task. How can you get a 5 year old to understand something like that in detail?

>>2853748
They were bullies who hurt alot of people but now the tracher says no more fighting?

Idk

>>2853748
>>2853766
Give Borly some credit here, guys. Hes a decnetly smart kid. He can probably get the basic gist behind it, so long as we dont go full exposition with it.

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>>2853720
“They’ve already surrendered, they aren’t trying to hurt us anymore.” you say. You try and take this moment to teach your kids a little something. “They’ve already given up, they just want to get back home. If your mother and I were stranded on an alien planet, you’d want them to send us back home, right?”
“But you and Momma don’t lose.” Chilli says, you chuckling at this.
“I lose to Lord Freeza every time we fight.” you say. “No matter how strong you get, there’s always someone stronger out there.”

As you say that you remember something you’d almost forgotten, when you had gone with Freeza and met Lord Beerus. You wonder, just for a moment, how strong that cat-man really is. But just for a moment, as you see something in the woods that catches your eye.

“What is it?” Meloka asks, golden aura flared up as she sees the look on your face, looking down as well. She cocks her head in confusion, seeing what you see. “How long has that been there?”
“It wasn’t here a few minutes ago.” you reply, you all slowly descending towards the unfamiliar tent. It is an odd thing, a large brown tent just sitting on the sand. Several odd, quadrupedal creatures roam around the tent, a few even have bright floatation devices on their legs as the stand in the water. You all land near the tent, the creatures paying you no mind. A bearded man, dressed in robes and a turban, an odd hat on top of the turban for some reason steps out from the tent. His teeth gleam silver as he smiles to you all, a crazed look in his eye.

“WELCOME NEW AND VALUED CUSTOMERS, TO CRAZY HASSAN’S USED CAMEL EMPORIUM!!” he shouts, his volume causing you all to flinch. “MY SLIGHTLY USED CAMELS ARE EVEN BETTER THAN NEW, CAMELS FOR ALL OCCASIONS AND PERMUTATIONS! COME COME! CRAAAAAAZY HASSAN HAS JUST THE DEAL FOR YOOOUU!!!”

....What?
>Who are you and how did you get here?
>What’s a camel?
>Sure, let’s see what you have
>No thanks, I don’t need a camel
>This is too odd, we’re leaving. Now
>Other(write in)

>>2853778
>Who are you and how did you get here?
>What’s a camel?

oh god

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>>2853778
>Who are you and how did you get here?
>What’s a camel?
Who fucking let this madman in?

>>2853778
>>Who are you and how did you get here?

>>2853778
>How do they taste?

>>2853778
Here’s hoping Vegeta doesn’t just televise they mass execution or some shit. I’d be deeply disappointed in the little dude.

>Who are you and how did you get here?
>What’s a camel?
>Sure, let’s see what you have.

I am... hesitantly intrigued.

>>2853778
>What’s a camel?
>Sure, let’s see what you have

What the fuck, why is this on the encounter list?
I mean, i'm not complaining...

You can't beat those deals, man.

>>2853810
You know, they just might make a delicious kebab, and at these prices who could complain?
let's fuckin get one, like treating our kids to ice cream, except instead of ice cream it's meat

>>2853778
>What’s a camel?
>Sure, let’s see what you have

>inb4 I don't have my wallet on me
>inb4 sold a camel anyway
>inb4 camels that allow for space travel equal to or greater than current ships
>inb4 Frieza gets a camel as a present
>inb4 Cooler gets a camel as a present

Fucking used camels for every occasion. Camel wizards, I swear.

>>2853778
.........my god you really fucking did it
>Who are you and how did you get here?
>What’s a camel?

>>2853784
>>2853793
>>2853806
>>2853810
>>2853814
>>2853815
>>2853820
>>2853833
Who are you and how did you get here, and what’s a camel wins it. Writing.

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>>2853778
“Who are you, and how did you get here?” you ask the strange man, confused.
“DID YOU NOT HEAR ME, FRIEND?” the man asks, shouting even louder. “I AM CRAZY HASSAN, AND THIS IS CRASY HASSAN’S USED CAMEL EMPORIUM!! I SELL YOU A SLIGHTLY BETTER-THAN-NEW USED CAMEL, YES?”
“What’s a camel?” Chaya asks him, you suddenly feeling a sensation of dread as the merchant’s smile disappears. That feeling disappears as he smiles again, suddenly beside you with his hand on your shoulder. You didn’t even see him move, and from the startled noise Meloka makes she didn’t either. Chaya simply seems amused by this creature’s antics, but he puts you on edge.
“YOU DONT KNOW THE JOYS OF CAMELS?!” he shouts, his smile back as he begins leading you into the tent. “COME, COME. CRAZY HASSAN WILL FIND THE RIGHT CAMEL FOR YOU, MY NEW AND VALUED CUSTOMERS!”

Before you’d realized it the merchant had already led you inside his tent, which is much larger inside than you’d thought. Hundreds of the creatures roam about, his boast of “every permutation” seeming less an idle boast and more a statement of fact. These creatures, which you assume to be camels, seem to come in every variety possibly imaginable. He leads you along, introducing you to countless near-identical camels and saying their names. You can’t tell many of them apart, most of the camels looking the same. He tells you of their lineages, their strengths and why no, that camel isn’t right for you friend. Until you come to one in particular.

“THIS ONE VERY SPECIAL! MUHAMMAD CAMALI BEST FIGHTING CAMEL EVER!” he says, another of the identical, bored-looking creatures eyeing you up. But this one’s different.
“Wait, fighting camel?” you ask, turning to the merchant.
“YES! MUCH LIKE YOU, MUHAMMAD CAMALI GREAT WARRIOR!” he says, you noticing that there’s what looks like a fighting champion’s belt hanging off it’s saddlebags. “UNDEFEATED IN THE FIGHTING PITS, NOW CAMALI RETIRED. BUT HE’S NOT FOR SALE.”

“I wanna fight the camel!” Chaya says excitedly, leaping from your arms. You and Hassan watch as Chaya floats level with ‘CAMALI’, taking her stance. “C’mon, Camel! Let’s fight!”

Chaya waits only a moment, then launches herself towards the camel and punches right at it’s nose. And what happens next you can barely believe.
cont

>>2853995
CHAYA NO!

>>2854018
CHAYA YES!!!!!

>>2853995
Chaya what are you doing. Stop, we can't fight Crazy Hassan, we'll all die.

>>2853995
oh fuck, i just wanted to eat kebab

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>>2853995

>>2854082
too bad
now kebab is gonna remove US from the planet

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2.87 MB GIF

>>2853995
You watch as Chaya punches at the creature, you worried for a moment how the merchant will react to Chaya killing one of his precious camels. Instead of your daughter punching it, however, the camel nimbly dodges her punch. For just a moment you feel the creature’s ki explode up, it dodging Chaya’s punch at the last moment. Your eyes widen in surprise, the creature far stronger than you’d have ever suspected. Chaya’s fist sails past harmlessly as the camel’s neck whips his head around, slamming it down onto Chaya’s whole back and sending her crashing into the tent’s floor.

“Chaya, are you alright?” you ask, but before you can reach down and grab her she pushes herself back to her feet, lips pursed.
“Grrr! I’mma get you!!” she shouts, blasting back up at the creature. She swings again and again at the camel’s head, it leaning back and away from every single punch. You watch in amazement as the creature dodges her every blow, it’s power rising up for only an instant as it moves. You have no idea the creature’s actual strength, it rising then returning back to the average level of the others instantly. Chaya tries over and over to hit the creature’s head, the camel narrowly dodging everything. Your daughter quickly gets frustrated by this camel dodging her attacks, and before she’s ready it again slams it’s head down on her. And again your daughter is knocked to the ground.

“Owowowowow.” she says, clutching the back of her head as she rises unsteadily to her feet. “That hurt, you big jerk!”

At that she sticks her tongue out at the camel, you feeling her ki rising as she gets more and more frustrated. You watch as she gathers her ki into her fist, preparing to unleash one huge punch. But before she can, the camel hocks a loogie right in her face. Chaya’s so startled so badly by this it breaks her concentration, your daughter falling on her rear.

“Eeeeewww!!” she says, taking her hands and wiping the camel’s spit from her face.
“You okay, kiddo?” you ask, kneeling down by her and putting your hand on her shoulder. She grabs Hassan’s robe and wipes her face and hands, the merchant still smiling.
“SEE? MUHAMMAD CAMALI GREATEST FIGHTING CAMEL!” Hassan says, silver teeth gleaming. “HE MAY BE RETIRED, BUT HE’S STILL THE CHAMP!!”
”This one’s caught my eye.” you say, pulling Chaya back a bit then popping your knuckles. “If you wouldn’t mind, I’d like to go a round with this champ myself.”

>Roll me a d100
DC 70

Rolled 91 (1d100)

>>2854092
YEEEEEEEART

Rolled 18 (1d100)

>>2854092
ON TO DEATH.

Rolled 52 (1d100)

>>2854092

Rolled 84 (1d100)

>>2854095
holy fuck

>>2854092
I must admit, i'm interested in this fighting camel.
Ship mascot anyone?

This isn't even the camel's final form.

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>>2854095
>>2854099
>>2854100
91/100. Impressive display, writing.

Rolled 86 (1d100)

>>2854092

>>2854110
>we impress Crazy Hassan enough for a discount and personal consultation as to what our camel needs are

>>2854092
this fucking gif gets me every time
like holy shit

>>2853995
Oh fuck, is he an eldritch monster, or is he so godly that he's fast enough to sell Berus and Whis a camel and run before it spits in their faces?

File: tenor (1).gif (2.56 MB, 498x249)

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>>2854122

>>2854124
Ultra Instinct Camali

>>2854124
He moved so fast that neither Karn nor Meloka could track him. And he got here by utterly unknown means. He's probably blessed by Nyarlathotep or some shit.

>>2854092
........why are we fighting Hassans camel for the nearby wargod next dimension over?

>>2854136
That......makes so much sense its scary. Only way I can see to confirm that is by seeing what happens if we get him near Beerus and Whis.
>>2854132
EXACTLY, SO WHY ARE WE TRYING TO FIGHT IT?!!!

>>2854124
>>2854136
>>2854149
>>2854132
I bet he has actual godly ki of his own, seeing as he can frameskip teleport with no need for Instant Transmission. It's not even IT because then we would have felt his ki move in that weird way it does with IT. This is actual jumping to another frame before the eyes and the mind can comprehend or track it.

>>2854155
When you say it like that I cant even be mad, out of all the bullshit in this continuity of that has absolutely no right whatsoever to be a threat, Hassan being some traveling merchant god makes the most sense.

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>>2854149
>>2854155
Maybe he's the very concept of Merchants throughout the omniverse. Every merchant is really just an extension of Hassan himself.

>>2854169
Where there is land to be traversed or cargo to be transported, Hassan will be there and you will be sold a camel suited to your journey for an almost unreasonably good price.
That's just how things work.

>>2854141
Khorne likes us. We kill better than the entire Inquisition and we have a similar name to him.
It's like we're his most endearing protege.

>>2854163
please make this canon
crazy hassan the traveling merchant god

>>2854203
However he must have the title by caveat of pulling a Kratos, and out merchanting the last god of merchants as a mortal, to the death.

>>2854296
>Hassan earned his godhood by selling a camel to a god who did not need it

bruh

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>>2854092
“YOU WISH TO FIGHT THE CHAMP AS WELL?” Hassan asks, you nodding to the used camel salesman. Chaya looks up expectantly at you, you smiling at her and ruffling her hair.
“Don’t you worry about me kiddo.” you tell her. “Your Daddy’s got this.”
“Get ‘em Daddy!” she says, pumping a fist and cheering you on. You turn back to the camel just in time to see it spit at you as well. You see it coming, leaning aside and letting it’s spit sail harmlessly over your shoulder. It looks at you, clearly surprised that you’d managed to dodge it. You drop down into your fighting stance, your normal aura flared up around you. You then notice that, not only has a white and black stiped camel stepped up between the two of you, but three ropes have been erected in a square around the three of you. You look around for a moment, confused. Then suddenly, you hear a bell.

DING DING DING

https://youtube.com/watch?v=ioE_O7Lm0I4

The white and black camel steps back as Camali steps forward, you stepping forward as well. You both cautiously approach each other, you trying to judge his range as he’s clearly doing the same. You swing first, a straight left jab aimed square for his nose. The camel of course dodges, leaning his head to the outside of your punch. You twist your arm, changing your punch into a backfist. Yet Camali seems unphased, leaning back and letting your fist sail harmlessly under his chin. Once your left fist sails past he strikes, swinging his massive head down at you. You almost didn’t manage to block in time, your right arm catching the creature’s head mere inches from your own. His power isn’t that impressive, you able to hold his head back with your forearm. You swing with a left hook, Camali again leaning back past your strike. You unleash a quick barrage of strikes, the creature dodging every single one of your strikes. It tries to retaliate between your combination of blows, you managing to block every one of it’s attacks as well. You stand and trade blows with the camel, realizing it is adding an extra wiggle in its neck, taunting you. You leave yourself a little more open in response, baiting the camel into an attack. It takes the bait, lunging it’s head straight for yours. Instead of dodging, however, you brace your feet and headbutt the camel back. It clearly wasn’t expecting this, you both straining against each other, neither of you giving an inch. You strain to hold the creature back, but before either of you can overpower the other-

DING DING DING

It’s over.
cont

>>2854296
>he became a god by performing a jojo's bizzare adventure-tier sale that could make the devil blush, tricking the god of merchants into selling his soul for some pocket lint, a canadian penny, a paper clip and a camel

I WANT THIS TO BE CANON

>>2854307
Wait what.....is the ref camel a trained practitioner and where the fuck did the ring come from..........were we in the ring the entire time but it was hidden by camel magic, WHAT IS GOING ON AND HOW?!!

>>2854319
Shhhhhhhh
No tears now

We're getting a new comrade
He's not for sale, but he'll come with us on his own.
That's a damn good deal.

>>2854326
We cock slapped almost every single enemy we have come across, our bosses, the god of destruction himself, had a bunch of kids, and ended a war and set up the execution of the leader of its army..........and we are fighting a camel, a fucking camel, and not only that, BUT A CAMEL OWNED BY CRAZY "MOTHERFUCKING" HASSAN HIMSELF! How did we get to this point?

>>2854331
That's what happens when the conductor refuses to apply the brakes on the hype train!!

>>2854338
You know what, fair enough.

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>>2854307
As the bell dings, the black and white camel puts it’s head between the two of yours, walking between you both. No one says anything, you turning back towards your family and seeing their various confused faces. You turn back, noticing the ropes and referee camel have all disappeared. Muhammad Camali is looking at you, then holds one of its feet up out towards you. You raise a fist, rapping it against the creature’s foot.

“MOST IMPRESSIVE FIGHTING!” Crazy Hassan says, slapping you on the shoulder. “HASSAN HAS NEVER SEEN ANYONE EARN THE CHAMP’S RESPECT IN A SINGLE ROUND. IT IS CLEAR TO HASSAN, THE CHAMP WILL STAY HERE WITH YOU.”
“Wait, what?” you ask, confused. “Isn’t he-?”
“NONSENSE, MY FRIEND!” Hassan says. “YOU DO NOT PICK CAMEL, THE CAMEL PICKS YOU. AND THE CHAMP HAS CHOSEN TO STAY WITH YOU NOW. A GREAT HONOR IT IS, YES!”
“Wait, but I can’t pay for this.” you say, Hassan waving you off.
“NONSENSE MY FRIEND, YOU ALREADY PAID.” Hassan says, handing you the camel’s reins. “I HAVE NOT SEEN SUCH A FIGHT IN MANY A YEAR. CRRRRAZY HASSAN’S PRICES ARE SO LOW, YOU’D HAVE TO BE CRAZY TO TURN THESE DEALS DOWN!”

“I... Uhh... Thank you.” you say, holding the reigns to the camel you were just fighting. Hassan quickly leads you all back outside, you turning back to the merchant. “Are you sure this is okay?”
“OF COURSE CRAZY HASSAN IS SURE!” he replies, eyes and silver smile gleaming. “THIS IS THE CAMEL FOR YOU, SAIYAN KARN. JUST MAKE SURE YOU LET EVERYONE WHO ASKS KNOW, YOU GOT YOUR CAMEL FROM CRAZY HASSAN!”
“I will.” you reply, waving to the merchant then turning to walk away. Then a thought hits you, you turning back. “Wait, how did you know my... name?”

He’s gone.

“Well that was... Bizarre.” Meloka says, you noticing Chaya eyeing the camel up and looking for taking another shot at him.
“He seemed like a nice enough guy, I reckon.” you say, grabbing Chaya’s fist as she rears back to punch at Camali again. “Not right now Chaya, okay?”
“Awwww, okaaaay.” she says, pouting a bit. She doesn’t take her eyes off the camel, making sure he won’t spit up on her again.
“Sooo... What now?” Meloka asks you.

Well?
>Check up on Tatsu, see how he’s holding up
>Find Raven, see how she’s holding up after all this happened
>Check up on Nappa, Turles, and the other wounded Saiyans
>Find Turles, Koriand’r, and Komand’r, see how they’re doing
>Other(write in)

>>2854375
>Check up on Nappa, Turles, and the other wounded Saiyans
Let's just....go. I don't want to think about Hassan at the moment. Let's just check up on our own people for now.

>>2854375
>>Find Raven, see how she’s holding up after all this happened

>>2854375
>Check up on Tatsu, see how he’s holding up
Dad got fucked up pretty hard

>Find Raven, see how she’s holding up after all this happened

>>2854375
Also, god bless crazy hassan

>>2854375
>Check up on Nappa, Turles, and the other wounded Saiyans
Let’s just...try and forget that happened. We’ve got a camel now. It’s strong enough to battle us in base form. That’s how it is.

>>2854394
He's retired though, he won't fight if he doesn't have to.

>>2854401
True. Maybe he can help train the kids? Chaya seems pretty set on fighting him, anyways.

>>2854416
They're going to be best friends for sure
bet my left nut chaya's going to be riding ali everywhere within a few weeks in-world

which is fine with me, i know she's safe with ali around

Rolled 1 (1d2)

>>2854382
>>2854383
>>2854385
>>2854386
>>2854394
And it seems we have another tie between Check up on Nappa, Turles, and the other wounded Saiyans and Find Raven to see how she’s holding up. I’ll roll tiebreaker
>1
Saiyans
>2
Raven

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>>2854426
Checking up on Nappa, Turles, and the other wounded Saiyans wins it. Writing.

....Okay...so we have a Fighting Camel now....Hey Broly! You have a new training partner when you want to learn how to use your Berserk Saiyan Form!

>>2854461
Muhammad Camali is pretty great, but I think he'd still die pretty fast if we pitted him against Berserk Broly.

>>2854467
I feel like Camali and Tatsu would get along just fine as combat veterans

>>2854487
>thousand yard stares intensify

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>>2854375
“Let’s.... Let’s go check up on the others.” you say, shaking your head a bit and lifting up into the air. Everyone follows you into the air, except for the camel. It seems that despite it’s power, it can’t fly.
“I’ll help Camalee!” Chaya says happily, flying down and sitting in the saddle on it’s back. It’s neck twists around, glaring at your daughter with one eye. But then it clearly feels it’s feet lifting off the ground, the creature panicking. It flails around a bit, but Chaya holds on to the saddle tight. “Let’s go!”

Despite Camali’s obvious discomfort, he settles down after a few moments of being held in the air by your daughter who is significantly smaller than himself. You can almost see the camel shrug, using this opportunity to get a bird’s eye view of the planet. You take the flight slow, observing the battle’s aftermath as you fly. You arrive to the city soon enough, it looking much like the city on Planet Vegeta after you all had exterminated the Tuffles. You focus on your ki sense, finding the familiar powers of Nappa, Tunnip, Leyas and Sarada all with even more you aren’t familiar with. You follow your senses down, landing outside the bombed out ruins of one of the many buildings destroyed in the battle. You all land outside the building, it’s doorway still intact. As you all land, Camali turns and again spits at Chaya. She wasn’t expecting that to happen again, you daughter shouting in surprise and falling off the camel’s back. For just a moment you’re worried she’s gonna get angry, but then you hear it.

“Heeh. Hehehehe. Hahahahahaha!” Chaya says, sitting up and clutching her belly laughing. She then leaps back at Camali, rubbing her slime-covered face in the base of his neck. You watch the camel sigh out in defeat, your daughter giggling and beaming up at him. You chuckle at the pair of them, then walk inside the building. You’re glad you got a laugh in beforehand, because you feel your blood boil at the scene before you.
cont

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>>2854375
Yeah that would be how we get a camel from that....man? And Chaya has a instructor in combat that is far to weird to be taken seriously. Next your gonna say he will give our kids tips when sparring against him in their minds.
>>2854426
I am okay with this.
>>2854467
>Forgot Ultra Instinct Camel powers already
He wouldn't lay a finger on him
>>2854535
>>2854487
Would it count if camel's have built in thousand yard stares?
>>2854540
>pic related
what the fuck is even happening
>You watch the camel sigh out in defeat, your daughter giggling and beaming up at him.
Nevermind, just best daughter beating the best through the power of diabetes, she is a natural fighter.

>>2854594
He's just about a match for us in base form though. As excellent as his technique is, Broly probably goes into the tens of millions when he goes Berserk. He'd just be too fast for Camali to keep up, even with the massive gap in skill.

>>2854621
kek

>>2854621
Fucking hell, saved. 10/10 anon, 10/10.

>>2854621
Fuck, can we get one of Brutus in the rubble blowing himself up

>>2854621
Good shit fresh OC

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>>2854540
You see that around fifty-ish Saiyans are all in the bombed-out ruins, every one of them various levels of injured. You hear several crying out in pain, medical staff and less-injured Saiyans running around and trying to help everyone. You try your best to not interrupt, yet your family’s entrance turns quite a few heads. You look around the crowd, focusing your senses until you pinpoint Nappa’s energy. Fortunately for you, he, Tunnip, Leyas and Sarada are all close to each other. You walk in, leading your family to Nappa’s side. You see the massive Saiyan laying on a cot much too small for him, his feet and right hand resting against the floor, his left bound to his chest. The cot is so small to him it only reaches Nappa’s knees. To his right you see Sarada, whose torso is mostly covered in bandages, along with her right leg and left arm. Leyas, arm in a sling and head wrapped up turns, as does Tunnip. She’s gotten patched up a bit as well, yet she’s clearly avoided the worst of the battle. She and Leyas both turn as you approach, you seeing the worry on their faces for those they hold dear. Nappa even opens his one unbandaged eye, seeing you all approach. Sarada, however, doesn’t move.

“Well well, look who’s here.” Nappa says, coughing a bit. “You look no worse fo- What is that?”
“He’s a camel!” Chaya says with a smile. Everyone nearby looks to your daughter and Camali, then to you as if expecting an answer.
“If you want a camel too, find a guy calling himself Crazy Hassan.” you say to the room, then turn back to your friends you’d consider brothers. “How’re you all holding up?”
“One of that Arbiter bastard’s men got me with his blade.” Nappa says, gesturing to his bound arm. “Got me right in the shoulder. Another got a lucky shot with those damn crystals, almost took my damn eye.”
“He’ll be fine in a few days.” Tunnip says. “Soon as the more urgent cases get through the Healing Pods, he’ll be good as new. But Sarada, however...”
“She got it rough.” Leyas replies. “Internal bleeding, broken limbs, the doctors said that even with the Healing Pod, she could have some permanent damage.”

“Dammit.” you reply, sighing out. You then transform into a Super Saiyan, holding a hand out to Sarada. You gather a golden ball of ki in your hand, leveling it at your longtime friend. You release the energy, your golden ki filling her body. You feel your energy boosting her own, her ki holding steady instead of steadily dropping. “If only I could do more.”

Leyas puts his hand on your shoulder, just nodding once. No words are needed, you both understand. Suddenly, you sense something. You and Meloka both sense it, turning and looking up into the sky. You see an odd, unfamiliar ship, it slowly dropping from the air to land in the city. You can sense something from that ship, but you’re not sure what. It isn’t exactly powerful, but-
>vote next post

>>2854638
-but you’re getting a bad feeling about this.

What will you do?
>Blast if from the air, no chances
>You and Meloka Couple Final Flash, obliterate it
>Go and greet it by yourself, have Meloka stay there with everyone else
>You and Meloka go greet it, leave the kids here with Nappa and the others
>Other(write in)

>>2854644
>Go and greet it by yourself, have Meloka stay there with everyone else
>mentally contact Vegeta and Frieza to give them proper warning about the ship

>>2854644
>>2854645
this

>>2854644
>Go and greet it by yourself, have Meloka stay there with everyone else

>>2854644
>flash up to ascended
>leave chaya and broly to ali and nappa
>contact vegeta and frieza, inform them you have a bad gut feeling about an incoming ship
>rush outside to greet the ship

going to bed, don't let the camel cripple anyone

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>>2854645
>>2854650
>>2854651
>>2854653
Greet the ship yourself, have Meloka and the kids stay with the others, and warn King Vegeta and Lord Freeza you have a bad feeling about that incoming ship. Writing.
Hope you’re ready for this, last post of the night incoming

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>>2854684
he's here

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>>2854644
You look to Meloka, your wife returning the worried glance. She nods to you, understanding your plan immediately. You launch yourself up into the air, hhe bombed out building missing most of its roof. You follow the strange craft as it heads towards a clearing, you linking to Vegeta and Freeza.

“Hey, this may end up being nothing.” you think to the two of them. “But a ship just started to land here at the city, and it’s giving me and Meloka a bad feeling. I can’t place it, but something’s just wrong with it.”
“Very well, keep me updated.” Freeza replies, Vegeta making the telepathic equivalent of grunting. You watch the ship land on top of the rubble of a destroyed building, you landing before it as a ramp begins lowering. You sense something from inside, but it feels wrong. You’ve never felt ki this twisted, but there’s also something else, something more. You watch as a powerfully built humanoid walks down the ramp, exuding an aura of total confidence. Whoever this guy is, he fears nothing.

“Greetings, Super Saiyan Karn.” the being says, giving you a Saiyan salute. This sets alarm bells in your head ringing, how the hell does this thing know your name?
“Who’re you?” you ask, taking a half step back and dropping into your fighting stance. Your instincts are warning you that this creature is dangerous, wanting you to flee from this being now. “And how do you know my name?”
“Ah, of course. Forgive me, I haven’t introduced myself.” the being says, striking a pose. “I am Kars, the ultimate life form! And I have come all the way here for you, Super Saiyan!

-Saiyan Conqueror Quest 56 paused-

>>2854715
And that’s it for tonight, everyone enjoying the new arc so far? Had fun with Crazy Hassan, and ready for meeting with Kars tomorrow? I’ll be up for a bit longer tonight for questions and comments, everyone glad to be back? Having fun so far?

>>2854715
...maybe we can bro it up?
I mean, once you're perfect, what's left but to enjoy life, right?

Have a pint, see a show?

>>2854717
tfw we didn't even get time to check if everyone was alright from the giant war before the next threat showed up
pls

>>2854727
>maybe we can bro it up?
Perhaps. He may not be here for a fight.
>tfw we didn't even get time to check if everyone was alright from the giant war before the next threat showed up
He hasn’t done anything overtly threatening yet. There was just something about him that set yours and Meloka’s instincts off.

>>2854751
My bet is that it's simply because we subconsciously recognize him as the ultimate predator, and our monkey brains are telling us that we'd qualify as 'prey' to such a being.
The prey will naturally fear the predator, after all.

Also reminder, thread will resume 1pm EST on Sunday.

>>2854754
>The prey will naturally fear the predator, after all.
That’s a good theory.

>>2853778
>>2853778
>>2853778


The madamn actaully did it

>>2854751
>yours and Meloka’s instincts off.
Mating instincts?

>>2854993
Yes.
>>2855067
No. More of the “mouse can feel an owl’s gaze.”

>>2854715
You know the second he finishes that sentence lets just toss his ass into orbit and incinerate him.

>>2855177
I mean you probably could. But aren’t you curious about what he’s got to say?

>>2855177
Save that for later, if and when he fights us

>>2855206
Fuck no, monkey smash weird posing thing.
>>2855209
>if
nice joke

>>2855206
We should make Kars an Honorary Saiyan, then make him teach us the secret of Pose.
Then we could teach it to the Ginyus and they'd have Double Posing Skills!

>>2855206
I'm interested in what Kars has to say. His also not supposed to be super rapey if he doesn't constantly belittled

>>2855271
You could.
>>2855295
He’d rather learn something else.
>>2855300
This. You’re not a Joestar, he has nothing against you.

>>2855312
>He’d rather learn something else.
Too bad, learning Pose.

He claims to be a perfect organism but does he have a perfect camel?

Checkmate, Karstheists

>>2855356
The perfect organism doesn't need a camel, he's his own perfect camel.

>>2855359
Sounds like something someone who isn't good enough to get a camel would say. You're not fooling me.

>>2855361
We need to throw him off his evolution game by making him fight our camel

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>>2854715
“Ah, of course. Forgive me, I haven’t introduced myself.” the being says, striking a pose. “I am Kars, the ultimate life form! And I have come all the way here for you, Super Saiyan!”

https://youtube.com/watch?v=XUhVCoTsBaM

“If you’re looking for an ass kicking, I’ll happily give you one.” you say, flaring your golden aura up around you. Whatever this thing is, it’s setting all your instincts off. Whatever the hell this Kars guy is, he’s dangerous. Despite his powerlevel being only in the low thousands, you get the feeling you shouldn’t underestimate him. The ground cracks beneath your feet as you power up, this Kars creature watching you very intently.
“Oh no no no, I’m not here for a fight.” Kars says, taking another few steps towards you and holding his arms out by his sides. “I’m simply curious about this marvelous golden transformation you have. This ‘Super Saiyan’ power of yours has caught my eye, mortal. I wish to understand it, and have it for myself.”

Wait, what?
>”What the hell does that mean?”
>”Only a Saiyan can become a Super Saiyan, and you’re clearly not one of us.”
>”Wait, mortal? You mean you’re some kind of immortal?”
“Why should I give away anything about this ancient legendary power? And to you?”
>Nope, none of this. Rush and attack him right now
>Death Slash, decapitate him before he takes another step
>Other(write in)
30 minute vote

>>2855430
>>”What the hell does that mean?”

>>2855430
>”Only a Saiyan can become a Super Saiyan, and you’re clearly not one of us.”
>Though I need to ask, What would you have to give in return, Equal trade and all.

>>2855430
>Wait, what?
>>”What the hell does that mean?”
>>”Only a Saiyan can become a Super Saiyan, and you’re clearly not one of us.”
>>”Wait, mortal? You mean you’re some kind of immortal?”

>>2855430
>”Wait, mortal? You mean you’re some kind of immortal?”
>"Is that why my instincts are screaming at me about how dangerous you are right now?"

>>2855430
>”What the hell does that mean?”
>”Only a Saiyan can become a Super Saiyan, and you’re clearly not one of us.”

>>2855430
>“Why should I give away anything about this ancient legendary power? And to you?”

>>2855430
>”Only a Saiyan can become a Super Saiyan, and you’re clearly not one of us.”
>Though I need to ask, What would you have to give in return, Equal trade and all.

>>2855469
>>2855438
Supporting this.

>>2855430
>Death Slash, decapitate him before he takes another step
DO NOT LET THIS FUCKER GET CLOSE!
>Do you know a man named Jonathan?

>”Wait, mortal? You mean you’re some kind of immortal?”
>"Is that why my instincts are screaming at me about how dangerous you are right now?"

Rolled 14, 22, 66, 52 = 154 (4d100)

>>2855436
>>2855438
>>2855439
>>2855442
>>2855443
>>2855452
>>2855469
>>2855504
>>2855514
”Only a Saiyan can become a Super Saiyan, and you’re clearly not one of us.” wins it. Interesting, need you to roll me a d100. Good luck.

Rolled 86 (1d100)

>>2855534

Rolled 57 (1d100)

>>2855534
Nat 1, inc.

Rolled 79 (1d100)

>>2855534
boi

Rolled 10 (1d100)

>>2855534
F

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>>2855542
>>2855543
>>2855549
86/100. Interesting and interestinger, writing.

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Sorry for the delay, but next post won’t be out for at least another hour because of work.

>>2855609
YOUR HOUR IS ALMOST UP

>>2855609
weren't you supposed to be off on weekends, fuckaroo?

>>2855843
There is no time off. Work. Work! WORK!

>>2855752
Almost done, just need to write votes.
>>2855843
Once the full time job goes, yes. This is the last weekend of one of my part-time jobs, the other ends this coming Friday.

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>>2855609
>>2855847
>>2855843
>inb4 he's a Russian techpriest
>>2855855
Sweet, good luck today m8, pic related

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>>2855430
“Sorry, but you’re out of luck.” you say, staying in your stance as this Kars walks closer. Something warns you that backing up would be a terrible idea, showing weakness to this being would be a mistake. You need to hold your ground. “Only one of us Saiyans can become a Super Saiyan. And you’re clearly not one of us.”
“Of course I am not ‘one of you,’ mortal.” Kars says with a hearty laugh. “I am the perfect being; the embodiment of the strengths of every single living being.”

You watch as he holds his right hand up, it turning green then morphing into a small, furry creature. Your eyes widen in surprise as you sense this thing has it’s own ki, yet it feels identical to Kars’s. It hops off the stump of his arm, running up and nuzzling his face. What the hell is going on?

“What the hell are you?” you ask Kars, the creature running back down his arm then reforming into his hand.
“I told you, Karn: I am the ultimate life form.” Kars says, taking another step closer. You are surprised again as he instantly grows a tail much like a Saiyan’s, testing the new appendage’s movement. “I am the pinnacle of evolution, an unkillable god amongst mortals. I am the last of my kind, the only Pillar Man to achieve true perfection.”
“The last?” you ask him, curious. “What happened to the others?”

“Many were weak, content with being mortals.” Kars tells you. “Many thousands of years ago, most of the others tried to stop me from attaining immortality. I convinced three others to my cause, and together we wiped the rest out. We were the last four of our kind, on our mission to become perfect. Then the others were killed, one-by-one, by that damnable Joseph Joestar! I was the last Pillar Man remaining, but I did it. I achieved the immortality I’d always dreamed of. To celebrate my rebirth, I hunted down that damnable man. But before the final blow was struck, he redirected my own power into the planet, causing a volcanic eruption to banish me into the void of space. But I suppose that’s all ancient history, spaceflight now being such a common thing amongst the wider stars. But now, we come to you.”

You realize that as he’d told his story, he had considerably closed the gap between you both. You now stand less than a dozen feet apart, the Super Saiyan and the immortal.

“I desire your Super Saiyan powers for myself, Karn.” he says, holding out a hand. “Come, help aid in my perfection reaching ever greater heights!”

Well?
>Sure, what do you want me to do?
>What’s in it for me?
>Why should I help you?
>No, now get off my planet before I obliterate you
>No. Attack him
>Other(write in)

>>2855873
>>What’s in it for me?

>>2855873
>No. Attack him
>Energy punch and send him flying up
>Event Horizon
There needs to be absolutely nothing left of this bastard.

>>2855873
>What’s in it for me?

>>2855885
IVAN DO NOT FUCK AROUND RIGHT NOW!

>>2855873
>Check with the planet and Yoda
>>2855886
and my original vote

>>2855873
>What’s in it for me?
>Why should I help you?

I really having nothing against Kars personally, but if he wants the power of our people, he better have a damn good offer in exchange.

>>2855893
Do you really think we can kill him that easy? It will probablly require some sacrifices on our end.

>>2855886
If we're sticking to JoJo canon, Kars is literally unkillable.

>>2855873
>What’s in it for me?
>Why should I help you?

>>2855873
>>Why should I help you?

>>2855886
Trying to fight Kars will simply get us killed. Main Jojo canon has him as completely fucking unkillable. And his novel version is even worse.

Either way;
>>What’s in it for me?

>What’s in it for me?
>Why should I help you?
should we mention that we know Joseph?

>What’s in it for me?
>Why should I help you?

We cannot win this.

Then if we fire his ass into a sun then he is stuck on it forever, or until the star explodes

>>2855927
As long as he doesn't figure out ki-based flight.

>>2855904
If we let him get close then he will require some sacrifices, we cant let him touch us.
>>2855915
He may survive a volcano but he cant handle point blank annihilation, especially if we aim him at the nearest sun
>>2855931
Easy, all we would have to do is not fly in front of him and fire away, as hard as we can, into a sun. Then while he's in space and cant move send a ship to follow him from a distance and use lasers to keep pushing him along towards the sun's gravity well. Once he hits that its game over for a few millennia and we just tell Beerus, well Whis anyway, about it and they blow the fucker into a pile of ash.

>>2855915
>And his novel version is even worse.
If this is the Novel Version, we're okay. Main Timeline Kars mellows the fuck out during the universe resets and is a pretty cool dude.

>>2855949
>inb4 2perfect 2hakai

>>2855885
>>2855886
>>2855890
>>2855901
>>2855902
>>2855910
>>2855914
>>2855915
>>2855917
>>2855924
Why should I help you? and What’s in it for me? both win. Roll me a d100, and let’s see what he has to say.

Rolled 94 (1d100)

>>2855965

Rolled 35 (1d100)

>>2855965

Rolled 54 (1d100)

>>2855965
>captcha asked me to select cars

Rolled 86 (1d100)

>>2855965

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>>2855968
>>2855973
>>2855974
94/100. Oh, he’s going right for the big offer. Well well, writing.

>>2855980
PILLAR SAIYAN.

>>2855980
I'm more then alittle aroused at this current offer and what it could mean.

>>2855955
Thats what i'm betting on plus we're also not joestars

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>>2855873
“Why should I help you?” you ask Kars, holding your stance and showing no fear. He stops at this, slightly cocking his head as if hearing a sound he’s never heard.
“What did you say?” he asks, an edge to his voice. You notice his entire body has gone tense, as if preparing to pounce. “Are you telling me, the great and terrible Kars, no?”
“I didn’t say no, at least not yet.” you reply, gathering your ki into your palms. If he attacks, you want to be ready. “I asked why should I help you, Kars? What’s in it for me if I help you?”
“In it for you...?” Kars says, clearly confused. He then seems to ‘get it,’ laughing again. “Of course, of course. I wouldn’t ask for something from nothing.”

At this he raises a hand and snaps, another humanoid rushing down the ramp and handing Kars what seems to be a mask of some kind? You notice that his subordinate is fully covered, leaving no skin expoosed whatsoever. You find this odd, but ignore it as the minion returns to the shadows within Kars’ ship. Kars, meanwhile, holds out what seems to be a mask made of stone. You look between Kars and that mask he’s holding, confused.

“I’m not interested in trinkets.” you say, eyes narrowing.
“Then you’ll be glad to know that this is no mere trinket.” Kars says, smiling fondly at the stone mask. “This is the key to a mortal such as yourself obtaining you own, lesser version of immortality.”
“Lesser version?” you ask, more confused. “What does that even mean? Either you’re immortal or you’re not, right?”
“I offer you the opportunity to become unkillable by most mortal means.” he replies, holding out the mask with his left hand while his right glows bright like the sun. “If you accept this, only Hamon and the light of a star’s rays can destroy you. Your body would no longer age, remaining as you are for the rest of time. You could take this mask and bestow immortality on whoever you wished. So what do you say, friend?”

He holds out the mask towards you.
cont

>>2856083
But bro, that would mean we couldn't go to the beach with Meloka and stare at her bikini'd body!

>>2856083
HIS NOT EVEN GIVING US THE GOOD IMMORALITY. THATS THE SHITTY VAMPIRE ONE.

>>2856083
>force strong enemy to wear the mask during day
>they instantly disintegrate

>>2856083
....Really Kars? Your 'Best Offer' is Vampirification? In return for the powers of a Super Saiyan? Probably even the higher levels of SS2, 3, and 4? Not a chance in hell. Go blow Beerus ya bloody mad man.

>>2856091
>go to the beach with Meloka and stare at her bikini'd body!
HAH, Like we gonna do that.
But yeah, It's gonna be kinda shitty in our line of job.
Also Kaptcha asked for more kars to be selected.

We need to contact the Supreme Kai RIGHT FUCKING NOW. We are about to get destroyed or abducted

>>2856083
There is literally no benefit to wearing the Mask. Vampirification is utterly fucking awful in the JoJoverse. It'd be better to dive into the depths of Castlevania than take such a shitty offer.

>>2856125
>Vampirification is utterly fucking awful in the JoJoverse
Part 4 and up it's kinda good, since there is almost zero Hamon Users.

>>2856125
>Full moon
>Giant, regenerative, flesh-shaping oozaru with plenty of abilities as a result and near limitless stamina
Itd be really powerful at night admittedly.

Also could do ice shit or possibly electrical shit by enhancing the body's bioelectrical output with experience

>>2856140
Our powers are literally better hamon Ivan, stop being such an Ivan.
>>2856083
I TOLD YOU PEOPLE, KILL THIS CHEAP MANSLUT, KILL HIM NOW!
>>2856102
>Grab hold of enemies head
>Putting a fucking mask that requires blood to activate on hime
>Not just death beam the guy's head as we crush his skull
>>2856111
You are technically correct, Meloka would not wear a bikini, which makes the mask even more worthless.

>>2856157
Ineffective vs enemies that regenerate from head crushing

>>2856140
its a shame we've actually dealt with the jo-stars and things like that.

>>2856157
>I TOLD YOU PEOPLE, KILL THIS CHEAP MANSLUT, KILL HIM NOW!
Kars is too strong for that. He'd easily destroy us before we could even remotely react against him. The only reason we aren't all dead right now is because he thinks he can bend us to his cause.

>>2856155
We would always have to hold back so we don't accidentally blow up the planet, and high intensity UV weapons, or anything could seriously injure when it would only be a minor inconvenience. The mask is useless to us if not an outright liability.
>>2856165
Complete incineration. The biggest regenerator is right in front of us. Or shattering it. The mask has no value to us in any situation that isn't hyper specialized, when we would still do better normal
>>2856178
Did all of you not read the part where we sensed his power level and he is still weaker than us, by a lot?

Okay, Becoming a Vampire Pros and Cons.
Pros:
Insane Regeneration.
Temperature manipulation.
Immortality, so we don't start declining in powerlevel at older age.
Mindcontrol with flesh buds.
Cons:
Almost every UV-light can kill us.
Joseph Joestar and his bullshit.
Hamon, which is a part of Ki-techinqe I assume.
If we are gonna fight in space we will get a shit ton of light from distant stars.
Half of the time we are useless.

>>2856199
Honestly, I'm against being a Vampire. There are better sources of Immortality out there. Besides, the sunlight thing is killer.

>>2856214
Yeah i'm with you on this one the sunlight thing is the main problem

>>2856199
Replace half of the time with three quarters and that is perfectly accurate.
>Immortality, so we don't start declining in powerlevel at older age.
And even this isn't true, when we get good enough with Ki we can prolong our aging with that instead without having to worry about it, plenty of characters can do this, Master Roshi is an excellent example. Or Yoda, possibly, technically? Never really got a clear answer if whatever his species is, is long lived or the force, or both. Might be both. Still another good example though.

>>2856223
>Master Roshi is an excellent example
Master Roshi drank the Elixir of Immortality.

>>2856180
>Did all of you not read the part where we sensed his power level and he is still weaker than us, by a lot?
>implying he isn't hiding his actual powerlevel by a cosmic fuckton
If I tried to list all of the bullshit that Novel-style Kars can get up to when pissed off, we would be here long into the night.

Ultimate Kars doesn't work based off of raw power like most Dragonball characters. He works off of pure hax. The kind that we wouldn't be able to defend against.

>>2856223
That's a Saiyan thing. Everyone else is good on that front.
>>2856214
Yeah most of the cons from being a vampire are terrible for Karn as a character.