>>2752391
>>Look out the window
While
>Reflect on what happened to your family
As sad music plays

>>2752407
This. Maximum drama

>>2752407
For some reason you plug your MP3 player into grandpa's old 1970s audio stack. The chrome and nickle green glass accents on it make you think of him, and that last 4th of july. Those were good times man. Auxiliary line in and a button press later, finly knurled knobs bring the volume up and drown out the rest of the house.
https://youtu.be/OaKVy-FlaUA?t=35

Fuck man. It wasn't fair. You just graduated highschool and things were going to be ok. Sure, insurance covered everything and you are now a very young home owner with a car and no debt, but...shit. Its all so empty. Glancing up you notice a streaming white dot in the sky.
---
>check out the dot
>go check 4chan
>keep vegging out.

>>2752419
>>go check 4chan

Our destiny is to get jobbed by spiders

>>2752422
4chan is a good place to drown your troubles. You check out /QST/ for a sec, recalling the good days back when qst was just part of /tg/ and /tg/ was just part of /b/, fuck you were a little kid back then, probably shouldn't have been on 4chan. Life punishes you for your past transgressions as you are abruptly crushed by a meteorite, ending your worldly existence. You never even had time for that fap, or that concert, you were finally going to probably have sex. probably. Stacy said she was going to pity fuck the hell out of you. Dammit. what does a boob even feel like?! A bag of sand? Maybe. Why are you still thinking?

Its really...really dark, but in front of you is a phosphor green line of text.

>CONTINUE? 1 Credit remaining.
---
>Y
>N
>Slap the text. Hard.

>>2752457
>Gently caress the text, then try and pocket it.
Also
>Y

>>2752462
Supporting

>>2752462
you mentally stroke the text. "Just be gentle. please. Lets do this"
>"No. 0 credits remaining."

Your world tilts, blackness spinning and nausea setting in. Weird glitch artifacts flash over your vision like some sort of synthwave video before blackness settles in again.

Its hard to breath. Shit! you are breathing, but its hard to move. there is something gritty all over you? Sand? Buried?! Whatever, you are alive!
----
>Try to dig out (roll 1d100)

Rolled 51 (1d100)

>>2752475

>>2752479
You start to dig, the work isin't hard, but there is just so much sand. It's everywhere, in your hair, your eyes. What feels like an hour later, you finally break the surface. You are on some sort of shitty beach. All the sand is sorta rocky, a little too big. Overhead is a giant shadow but you can't really appreciate it as you brush sand from your eyes.

As your vision clears, you finally can make out whats going on. All around you are giant...crabs. Looking up is some sort of dragon. What the hell is going on, how is this real?
---
>Scream
>Try to remain calm and examine the surroundings more.
>Run back into the hole you came out of.

>>2752488
>Run back into the hole you came out of.

>>2752492
You nope the fuck out of there just in time for the world to shake around you. All around it feels like bombs dropping, but its those giant fucking dragon things landing. You wait a few minutes for the thumps to stop and eventually get brave enough to look out of the hole. Seagulls. Giant..fucking..seagulls. They are eating all the other crabs. You decide to hide out for a while longer and go back into the hole.

But how to pass the time.
---
>Dig down (1d100)
>Just wait until they are gone.

>>2752500
>Just wait until they are gone.

>>2752515
You wait a few hours, peaking out of the hole now and again, the carnage is absolute. Wrecked crab bodies litter the beach, the gulls bloated and full flew off a few more hours ago, but you wait a little longer before you crawl out of your hole and take in the ocean air. Fuck man, you are hungry. Like starving.
-----
>Scratch your head
>Go look at the crabs, maybe you can eat something. freshish sushi?

>>2752519
Look at crabs

>>2752527
You scuttle towards the crab across the beach with all it's shitty rocks. Scuttle. wait. You look down. Claws. Oh fuck, you've seen this shit on cartoon retruns. Someone captured you and spliced your DNA with sea life like in streetsharks. This shit is not jawsome! its not jawsome at all! You try to scream but cant, instead a slight burbling comes from your mouth. Oh no. oh no. fuck. But you are so hungry, its hard to think. Panic and hunger. As you make your way over the crab, the realization sets in harder. You are a tiny fucking crab on a big ass beach. The mangled carcass of your countryman looks up at the sky with one eye stalk, the other seems to stare at you. Hungry.
---
>Try to eat this crab.
>Just walk away and look for something else.
>Other (Write in)

>>2752540
>Eat the crab.

Lament the lack of salted butter and lemon

>>2752500
Dog down

>>2752540
Eat crab
It's a crab eat crab world
It's not unheard of a crab eating another crab

>>2752557
>>2752549
>>2752545
Shrugging internally, you listen to instinct and start consuming the crab. Whats left of it. Unexpectedly powerful claws reach out and crush it's skull, popping off pieces of meet which you happily stuff into your mouth. This is actually really good. really, really good. You could get used to this. You also feel better, a bit more healthy. You spend the rest of the high noon eating this crab, your little belly quite full, but there is still a lot more meat on this beach.
---
>Go eat more crab carrion
>Explore
>Go back to your hole and sleep.

>>2752564
>Go eat more crab carrion

>>2752564
>>Go eat more crab carrion
We must become Cancer Incarnate.

>>2752564
>>Explore
Our people died as they lived; cowering and stagnant
What little potential they had for greatness lies in our crustaceous belly.

>>2752564
>Go eat more crab carrion

>>2752573
>>2752570
>>2752568
With ravenous hunger, you scuttle like a very small but powerful (you tell yourself) crab consuming machine. Ripping off limbs and tender meat from the fallen. You keep feeling better, your head is more clear, and oddly, you are still ravenous. These smaller crabs..smaller? have you been growing a little? Maybe. Its getting dark outside, the stars are visible and the setting sun hides on the extreme edge of the horizon.
---
>Keep eating. EAT ALL THE CRAB (1d100)
>GTFO to sleep
>Explore.

Rolled 54 (1d100)

>>2752577
>>Keep eating. EAT ALL THE CRAB (1d100)
Oh I didn't realize we had Dark Souls growth.
CONSUME.

Rolled 84 (1d100)

>>2752577
>Keep eating. EAT ALL THE CRAB (1d100)
THE CANCER IS UPON US!

Rolled 51 (1d100)

>>2752581
ULTRA-CANCER

>>2752581
>>2752580
>>2752587

>84

With unnatural hunger for your own kind, you spend the night viciously eating their cadavers, cold and dead, it matters not. Plus they are pretty tasty and you are growing. That and its a pretty good distraction from the fact that your life was shit for so long, and you are a fucking crab now. Smaller creatures of the night slink at the extreme edges of your vision, also partaking in the gruesome feast. The sun begins to peak back up over the opposite edge of the horizon and you stand, quite full and content at the beach's edge. The ocean waves lapping at your pointed feet. You feel good, and tired. At the ocean's edge is an aquatic crab looking at you, curious blue splotches on it's shell and claw mark it. In stark contrast to your dry bumpy shell, it is slick and wet. It snap's its claws in either greeting or challenge.
---
Trait gained> Flesh eater; you seem to get more out of meat.

>Time to sleep, go dig a hole.
>...no..fight it...keep eating. (roll me a 1d100, high DC)
>Chase crab into the water (1d100)
>Lure crab onto land (1d100)
>Snap back. (1d100)

Rolled 36 (1d100)

>>2752588
>>Snap back. (1d100)
YO BREAK YOSELF FOOL

Rolled 69 (1d100)

>>2752588
>Snap back. (1d100)
We'll eat'cha too!

Rolled 48 (1d100)

>>2752588
>Snap back. (1d100)
FRIENDO!

File: YH85357_01_005.jpg (79 KB, 325x585)

79 KB JPG

>>2752598
>69
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=izGwDsrQ1eQ

File: 14171821843_c478f75870_b.jpg (254 KB, 1024x674)

254 KB JPG

>>2752598
You snap in challenge. Apparently your gesture was quite rude, as the aquatic crab dashes out of the ocean, and cunningly rushes into a temporary pool, not quite deep enough to submerge the aquatic crab, but not deep enough to drown you either.

It swings its claws about, its message clear "Dare you enter my magical realm? Bitch."
---
>Fight crab (1d100)
>Instigate crab (1d100)
>look around (1d100)

Rolled 27 (1d100)

>>2752606
>Bury Crab in Sand (1d100)
You think you so clever now eh CUNT!

File: 4Dp7kAb.jpg (34 KB, 600x450)

34 KB JPG

Rolled 5 (1d100)

>>2752606

Rolled 9 (1d100)

>>2752609
supporting

>>2752614
>>2752610
Water Crab has seen this trick before! FUK!

>>2752609
you flick chunks of sand at the crab, your devious plan impossible for it to escape from. Soon its petty pool will be a SANDY TOMB! But this really isin't going anywhere, and the water crab just splashes you back. Now you are wet and feel stupid.
---
>leave the crab, it is silly. go explore.
>no. the crab must die. (1d100)
>Wait for the birds to return... while you search the sands nearby. fucker will get his. (1d100)

Rolled 72 (1d100)

>>2752606
Quick, FIRE BREATH.

Rolled 42 (1d100)

>>2752623
Seduce blue with a dance.

Rolled 53 (1d100)

>>2752623
Breathe FIRE!

Rolled 88 (1d100)

>>2752623
Seduce the crab. And when their guard is down WE KILL EET!
We shall become Assassin Crab!

>>2752628
Guy. You just rolled.
Hey check ot out. Your ID has guy in it.

File: UASDntitled.png (1.65 MB, 1056x1056)

1.65 MB PNG

>>2752623
>Burrow somewhere safe and sleep
also >>2752600
pic related

Rolled 48 (1d100)

>>2752623
Befriend the crab.

>>2752629
>>2752629
You have no idea what the fuck you are doing, but let your instinct drive you. Wagging your claw in tight controlled ticks, you slap your own carapace slowly. The aquatic crab is intrigued and edges closer to the water's edge where you extend your claw fully, holding a few grains of sand that catch the light. As you run your powerful and masculine claw over it's shell, the foolish crab comes a bit further onto land. This is getting weird for you now. It begins to blow foamy bubbles from its mouth and presents it's rear to you, disgorging a large volume of eggs at the tide pool's edge.

It's brazen offer of headonistic crab pleasures has no effect on you, and you pinch it's shell with both claws. Erotic intrigue turns into animal terror as the blue crab struggles, flailing about and dragging you into the water.
---
>Hold on and keep crushing. (1d100)
>Retreat (1d100)

Rolled 42 (1d100)

>>2752636
>>Hold on and keep crushing. (1d100)
YOU'VE FALLEN RIGHT INTO MY TRAP YOU BLUE BITCH

Rolled 91 (1d100)

>>2752636
>Hold on and keep crushing. (1d100)
Gill'ER!

>>2752636
Wow I'm pretty sad

Rolled 87 (1d100)

>>2752636
Welp. Eggs are already in the pool. Try ensemenating them?

>>2752642
Its hard going from being a kissless human to a kissless crab, only to discover a potential for love and opt for violence. Plus you still don't know what a boob feels like. life is suffering. crab suffering.
----
>>2752640
Working your claws like tin shears in automotive class you begin to make small, gradual cuts into your hated enemies shell. She was from the ocean, you were from the land, your heavy heart is drowned out by the fire of combat and survival. The struggle is ongoing but its conclusion decided. The sound of crushing shell continues as the blue crab's eye stalks drop limp. It is dead. A full half of it's rear is a mangled ruin of shell and meat, various bits of leg and meat sheared off, drifting lazily in the water. Tiny crab heart racing, you feel alive, upset, wild, you have killed. YOU HAVE KILLED! Raising your claws to the sky, you condemn your enemies, and revel in your glory. Fuck you jeff! FUCK YOU JEFF! Wait. Jeff would probably laugh at you being a crab right now. fuck. whatever. The fight took a lot out of you and you are pretty peckish, but are also exhausted. Above you a single bird observes, not a gull, but something smaller...
----
>Eat the defeated crab (1d100)
>Go take a nap

>>2752648
>>2752647
Just for you anon. I'll let the other anons decide.
----
ALSO
>Eat the eggs (mmm crab caviar)
>...try to fertalize crab eggs (1d100)

Rolled 3 (1d100)

>>2752648
>>Eat the defeated crab (1d100)
And then sleep like the fatass autist we are

Rolled 66 (1d100)

>>2752650
>>...try to fertalize crab eggs (1d100)
Nothing like jerking off in a shallow pool to cap off a day of cannibalism and murder.

Rolled 5 (1d100)

>>2752648
>>2752650
>>...try to fertalize crab eggs (1d100)

Rolled 65 (1d100)

>>2752650
>...try to fertilize crab eggs (1d100)
WE SHALL HONOR BLUE CRAB'S WONDERFUL SACRIFICE TO OUR GAPING CRAB MAW!

Rolled 53 (1d100)

>>2752648
>Eat the defeated crab (1d100)
Remember to give praise to the Crab Gods for our victory.

Rolled 34 (1d100)

>>2752650
>...try to fertalize crab eggs (1d100)
Cool thanks

Rolled 78 (1d100)

>...try to fertalize crab eggs (1d100)

In time we can eat our offspring

>>2752662
We would be more likely to encounter a defendant of theirs in the future.

I wonder if fertilizing these eggs are even possible, as these are two different crab breeds.

>>2752662
>>2752653
66
>Nothing like jerking off in a shallow pool to cap off a day of cannibalism and murder.
>In time we can eat our offspring
>>2752659
53
>Remember to give praise to the Crab Gods for our victory.
-----
You drag the slain crab out of the water to the shore's edge, near it's egg pile. This is what it would have wanted...maybe? Looking at the glistening eggs, you are overcome with a strange urge, something instinctual. Oh gross. No no no..Your instincts say yes. Oh yes. Soon your tail is sitting over the eggs as you spray your crabby mangurt onto them. In time perhaps they will grow into your next lunch? When did you become so heartless? Is this you, or the crab, or are you freed from the shackles of humanity, to hunt the sands?

Looking over at the slain she-crab, it matters not. You dive into the carcass with gusto, ripping apart flesh and shell. As you pop bits of meat into your maw, you are hit with a strange sensation of power, a touch of the ocean. It feels good and drives you to eat more, in your gorging you dont notice a bird, a touch bigger than yourself, watching you eat from just a foot away.
---
>Fuck off bird. (no roll required)
>Come here pretty bird, I will share my spoils of war with you. (1d100)
>Keep eating (1d100)

>>2752667
What does the birb mostly likely resemble?

>>2752667
>Fuck off bird. (no roll required)
Crush it's beak it it gets close enough. Blub blub nigga you wanna go?

Rolled 41 (1d100)

>>2752667
>>Come here pretty bird, I will share my spoils of war with you. (1d100)
You too shall be shat out by the great Crabbo in time.

>>2752667
>Fuck off bird. (no roll required)

File: gallery-1455630691-crab-gif.gif (519 KB, 480x278)

519 KB GIF

>>2752667
If the bird is only a touch larger then we can take it on. It may beat us slightly in heat, but we outclass it in weight. SQUAT CRAB!

Rolled 93 (1d100)

>>2752667
>Lure Birb close with crab meat
>Crush Birb with mighty claw of rage

Rolled 68 (1d100)

>>2752671
Good idea. Lure it in the go for the kill.

>>2752675
+1

Imagine there's some nearby zoologist watching and recording us killing the crab and bird thinking "wtf nature you scary."

>>2752669
You snap at the bird with one claw while eating. It is apparent it will get neither your meat, nor your eggs. Besides, that would be pretty gross considering what you just did to them. Fucking stupid bird. It looks like some kind of small finch, things like that really don't belong on the beach anyway. Bit by bit the slain crab is consumed, you consider wading into the tidepool for the last scraps but realize your potential progeny may need the nutrients. All in all, there has been cannibalism, murder, and you even had sex. Sort of. You feel content, but exhausted. Its been nearly 24 hours since you first woke.

You locate your old hole, now a bit too small, and work your way down, strength and resolve, along with two diggy claws, making short work of the situation. Soon you drift off, your eye stalks retracting into your shell.

The phosphor glowing green text greets you again, a text cursor flashing like some shitty 1980s PC at the end of a list. While confusing you realize that it is a menu, and simply cascade open both lists to see what they are. Perhaps there is something that can help you not be a crab. Sadly there are no other menus. There is a weird error menu, but whats with that? The Error text jiggles and shakes periodically, distorting with red lines.
---
Available points: 140 points

>Physical
-Size (overall boost to stats and size) 10, 20, 40, 80, 160
-Claws (more powerful pinch) 5, 25, 45, 65,
-Water Adaptation (Gained from slain crab: one off skill granting water breathing and enhanced mobility under water, as well as a general stat bonus.) 100 points

>Magical
-Salt Magic- 80 points (gained from slain crab)

>ERROR 100 points
-error 100 points
-error 100 points
-error 100 points

>>2752689
>ERROR 100 points

Sounds fantastic.

>>2752689
-Water Adaptation (Gained from slain crab: one off skill granting water breathing and enhanced mobility under water, as well as a general stat bonus.) 100 points

Size Tier 1, claws tier 2. I wanna fuck up some sharks.

>>2752693
I’ll support this.

File: E5D279F0-563E-4D80-9AD3-A(...).png (4 KB, 246x205)

4 KB PNG

>>2752689

File: img_1373-800x533.jpg (132 KB, 800x533)

132 KB JPG

Sooooon.....

>>2752693
Yes +1

>>2752693
supporting

>>2752689
fuck yes, giant enemy crab time.
>Size 20
>Salt Magic 80
We'll be the saltiest crust of the seas!

>>2752691
>>2752693
It seems there are two trains of thought

Highly dangerous and unknown "ERROR"

or

Physical boost...
----
roll me for these two, and may the best result win.
ERROR: 1d100
Physical Aquatic: 1d100

>>2752706
Also available is

Magic Salt crab: 1d100

Rolled 18 (1d100)

>>2752706
>Saltcrabbe!

Rolled 29 (1d100)

>>2752706
switching to ERROR
WILDCARD BITCHES

Rolled 92 (1d100)

>>2752706
Are we Rolling for both or one of the two?

Rolled 96 (1d100)

>>2752706
ERROR: 1d100

BEEP BOOP

>>2752706
FYI still rolling for physical.

>>2752710
I assume we're picking one and rolling for it.

>>2752713
Awe nuts. Looks like you beat me.

>>2752715
I'm sorry Anon, I'm a sucker for Mystery Boxes.

>>2752391
>>2752689
this is my first time on /qst/ with no idea what to expect and holy shit OP fantastic work

Rolled 17 (1d100)

>>2752706
ERROR: 1d100

File: 1406344174570.png (464 KB, 892x895)

464 KB PNG

>>2752711
>>2752717
Thank you, and welcome to /qst/. If you get the chance check out some of CursedQM's work, his quest is the basis of this.
---
And to everyone that rolled, thanks for being patient with me while I figure out how we conclude decisions.
---
>>2752711
>>2752675
You focus on the glitching error selection, its a total unknown, but its outside the bounds of what you are supposed to select. You can tell that much. Still you have the points for it. Moving the flashing cursor to the appropriate section comes intuitively, and with a mental "enter" and find yourself back at the primary list, with the Error message even more heavily glitched. You dont have enough points for it, but do for a quick boost to size and claws. With all the appropriate entries made, you mentally hit enter again, and the list fades from view. You awake to a large bird head rummaging around in your Nest. The squawking bastard attempts to bite you several times before you simply reach out with your claw and neatly pinch it's feathery head from it's neck. There. Fuck you seagull.
---
>Eat seagull from the comfort of your pit
>Venture out into the light, see what changes have happened to your body.

>>2752733
>Eat seagull from the comfort of your pit

>>2752733
>Eat seagull from the comfort of your pit
Time for Breakfast!
My only hope is that we're now a Robot but in Crab form. But if not then oh well, I can live with it.

>>2752736
>>2752738
You drag the seagull down into the pit, muffled noises you are unfamiliar with emanate around you. Powerful chunking noises resound as you pull the bird apart and process it into your little crab mouth. That was a good breakfast. You must be larger because your pit is now ruined again.

Erupting from the loose sand, you look around at the world around you. Oh holy shit! You have a hud! Fucking-A! Looking around you, you can get a reticule around various animals and there's even informatics about yourself. Looking down at your claws, they are Metallic, and you spot exposed machinery here and there. Ok. Weird. but cool. No weirder than being a crab. Speaking of which, you seem to be about the size of a coconut, a small coconut. Not too far away are seagulls, and a little further is the tidepool where you murdered your first paramour.
---
>Explore tidepool
>Chase seagulls
>Search for slower food

>>2752742
>Search for slower food
We should explore our new world.

>>2752744
>>2752744
You Plow along the beach, looking for new things to eat. Tiny crustaceans get popped into your mouth as you make your way, their feeble lives exist only to fuel yours. Around you confused seagulls squawk and occasionally peck at your metallic exoskeleton leaving small scratches on it's surface. Ahead of you the beach stretches out endlessly. To your left is a mangrove forest, and to your right is the ocean.
---
>Go fuck with the ocean (1d100)
>Go fuck off in the forest (1d100)
>Continue to dominate the beach (1d100)

Rolled 3 (1d100)

>>2752748
>Go fuck off in the forest (1d100)
Eat more birbs.

Rolled 80 (1d100)

>>2752748
>Go fuck off in the forest (1d100)

The rise of the Machines begins now.

>>2752750
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bOCVCGkEEQw

Tiny hydraulic legs carry you forward into the lush mangrove forest. Sandy soil quickly turns into a blanket of rotting leaves and biological mulch. You experimentally snap your claw a few times; it whines and hisses. This is all so weird, but its not like any afterlife you ever heard of. Your thoughts are interrupted by a a pack of crabs scuttling out of some nearby undergrowth. They appear to be coconut crabs as well, but do not like your appearance, and seem to be bigger than you by a little. You however are at least partially metal and maybe smarter than a regular crab?
---
>Walk off
>Snap at them in challenge 1d100
>Surprise motherfuckers (charge) 1d100
---

Rolled 38 (1d100)

>>2752748
>Go fuck off in the forest (1d100)

Bet those endangered dolphins are pretty tasty

Rolled 16 (1d100)

>>2752761
>Surprise motherfuckers (charge) 1d100

Death 2 these forest dwellers!

Rolled 12 (1d100)

>>2752761
>Surprise motherfuckers (charge) 1d100

Rolled 73 (1d100)

>>2752761
>Surprise motherfuckers (charge) 1d100

>>2752770
>73
You dash forward at a great velocity, your hud briefly flashes a warning for something before you grab the smallest crab of the trio around the head and crush it with unrepentant violence. A small puff of steam vents of out of your mouth, but your victory is short lived as the two larger crabs begin their deadly string of pinches against you. Metal groans under their pressure.
---
>attack their claws (1d100)
>Attack their heads (1d100)
>fuck this, try to escape (1d100)

Rolled 74 (1d100)

>>2752782
>Attack their heads (1d100)

They are no match for mecha crab

File: 57BA2E8C-85C3-4E0C-9D7C-5(...).jpg (67 KB, 630x630)

67 KB JPG

Rolled 4 (1d100)

>>2752782
>Attack their heads (1d100)
For the crabpacey!

Rolled 84 (1d100)

>>2752782
>Attack their heads (1d100)
Gotta fight them like the're bullshit boss fights, if they don't go down in that one blow then you gotta find the "fuck them up" spot somewhere else!

Rolled 22 (1d100)

>>2752782
>Attack their heads (1d100)

They will not deny the rise of our metal empire.

>>2752787
>>2752791
Something inside you whines as a capacitor charges, and you lunge your little crab claw out like a club, knocking one assailant away while you set to work dismembering the other crab in a flurry of hydraulic assisted pinches. Soon all that is left is crab ceviche, sans the lime juice. or onions, chilies, or anything else. Ok, you just made a pile of semi cubed flesh from a once living creature, and now really miss eating real food.

the other crab is retreating from you, its transparent hemolymph leaking out onto the musty forest floor. Your hud is flashing the outline of a crab (you) with various components colored in green, red or yellow. It would seem your super structure has taken a bit of a hit.
----
>Eat the dead and check your upgrade menu afterwards (no roll)
>Chase down the survivor, and then eat the dead (1d100 for happenings)

>>2752800
>Eat the dead and check your upgrade menu afterwards (no roll)
We must heal up the damage we received with free food.

Rolled 6 (1d100)

>>2752800
>Chase down the survivor, and then eat the dead (1d100 for happenings)
GoGo Crabget Murder Claw!

>>2752800
>Eat the dead and check your upgrade menu afterwards (no roll)

No rush, might as well benefit from eating the dead one.

>>2752800
>Eat the dead and check your upgrade menu afterwards (no roll)

Let's not get cocky

>>2752808
>>2752802

You chow down on the two dead crabs as their companion retreats. You watch it shuffle into the underbrush, defeated, and if it is capable of feeling shame, it does...it probably is shamed. You will not allow its emotional limitations detract from your perceived glory of killing two coconut crabs. Yes, you are triumphant and powerful. And pretty banged up. Also how the hell are you eating, are you crab or machine? Robocrab?

What you really want is to review that strange upgrade menu, and with a little bit of effort you blank out of this world and back to the black screen with the glowing green text. Some things have changed to be sure. Its...kind of the same, but not really. The friendly green text is now replaced with a faded amber phosphor, with heavy scan lines. It seems almost industrial. The interface beyond that is the same, so you quickly cascade open the menus available.
------
Available points: 110

>Systems
Environmental Seal (ok...probably water and dust resistance)
50
Component Hardening 1 (no idea)
10
Chassis upgrade 3 (this must be comparable to "size")
80
Booster 1 (a crab can dream)
1000
Aquatic mobility thrusters (noice.)
60
Self repair 1
40

>Defensive
Environmental Hazard 1 (general environmental resistances?)
100
ERA 1 (my uncle said ERA means explosive reactive armor.)
80
Composite 1 (probably lightweight armor.)
100
Ferrous (ok, this is totally regular metal armor)
10

>Offensive
Claws 2 (ok. claws. easy.)
25
Sodium laser 1 (....)
300
Micromissiles 1 (more...)
500

----
Just like last time the highest roll wins the choice, and that roll can include saving the points.

Rolled 85 (1d100)

>>2752822
>Environmental Seal (-50)
>Component Hardening 1 (-10)
>Self Repair 1 (-40)
These all sound important.

Rolled 62 (1d100)

>>2752824
+1

Rolled 42 (1d100)

>>2752824
Supporting

>>2752824
supporting

>>2752824
>>2752824
>110-100=10
You lock your choices in and finalize. When you come to you notice a few things.

There are rubber like gaskets and "boots" around your joints. The thin lines around your shell seem to be much better fitted together and OH FUCK HOW ARE YOU DOING THAT?! Ok. this is new. everything has been new, but it seems your eye stalks have some reach on them now, and you are able to extend them...oh the length of your body. Weird. useful. but weird. Getting a near isometric view of yourself is cool, and reminds you of better times with old cRPGs. You have some sort of dark grey rubberized sheeting layered over a lot of your "shell" along with bits of bright mylar like material. Small sparks are emitting from where you took damage with the rents visibly mending.

All in all, you think it looks pretty cool, but despite your mechanical nature you feel HUNGRY.
---
>Forage for food
>Hunt for food
>Explore deeper.

>>2752833
>Explore deeper.

Rolled 61 (1d100)

>>2752833
>Hunt for food

Try for something other than crabs. Maybe we can eat a scorpion and incorporate its tail or something to shoot lasers out of.

>>2752833
>Hunt for food

>>2752837
>>2752838
hey guys, I gotta get some sleep. Ill be back when i wake up. As far as upgrades go. You will be a crab. Only special enemies grant special upgrades.

Aquacrab was your first "boss".

>>2752842
Sleep tight, don't let the bed crustaceans bite

>>2752842
Cheers mate, been fun so far.

>>2752833
>Forage for food
Something better to do than eat meat all day

>>2752833
>Hunt
Moar. We need more. All shall be sacrificed to RoboCrab!

>>2752842
this looked like fun hope i am here for the next run

>>2752842
RIP Aquacrab, she was only looking for a good lay.

File: tumblr_inline_pbqnl7v0oy1(...).jpg (145 KB, 540x720)

145 KB JPG

>>2752842
>pictured: NonGent jotting down dumb bullshit

>>2754083
Oh sweet solstice child. You have no idea. A fucking Crawfish writing about crabs though. What next? Will you condone sexual acts with animals? Vile. You are a vile human. Leave my quest until you can find a picture of a crab holding a pencil. Oh. I'm back.
>>2752838
>>2752837
61
You rummage through the undergrowth, clipping away with your claws as your optics scan ahead. You pick up several interesting trails, one of them is the injured coconut crab. There are also some very obvious and large human sized footprints...from a human! Lastly you spot fragments of metal.
---
>Follow the crab
>Follow the Human
>The metal...

>>2754300
>The metal...

>>2754305
You follow along the path of the metal, picking up bits of the shiny substance from the rich black soil. Each bit shoved into your mouth is processed by unseen cutting wheels and saws, whining away as you spew the occasional spark. Small insects skitter away from you, their survival benefited by your current predisposition for eating the ferrous material. Its weird that it hasn't rusted yet. Hmm. By chance you try to spit sparks again, and do so with greater volume. Cool. This is probably useful.

>Gained: Spark Spray; spew a shower of sparks from your mouth with the chance to blind or harm an enemy. Caution: Sparks may cause fire.

The trail eventually goes cold, but you discover why: Ahead is your quarry, in a clearing surrounded by small...small monkeys. Pygmy marmosets. You remember your sister used to want one for a pet. Choke back the pain. You are a kick ass cyber crab now. Cybercrabs do not cry...
---
>Roll 1d100 to not cry.

Rolled 89 (1d100)

>>2754317

Rolled 68 (1d100)

>>2754317
w-weh!

Rolled 52 (1d100)

>>2754317
NO TEARS. ONLY MURDER.

what if we make it a goal to get strong enough to revive the family?

>>2754320
Choking back nothing, especially not tears, you silently stalk forward to the edge of the clearing. The small monkeys are arrayed around a very large Hermit Crab...robot? Like you? It appears to be dead, or deactivated. The little monkeys are no bigger than a redbull can. Ugh that shit always tasted like sweet tarts and bad times, you remember one time when you drank 12 of them back to back like an idiot and wanted to die. Just like the redbull cans, there are 12 monkeys. Surely not a reference to a movie. The little fuckers seem to be equipped with spears and what looks like a matchstick or something on the end.
---
>scuttle away quietly.
>Charge in spraying sparks and clacking for death
>Draw their attention and indicate what it is you want. (food. the dead crab. their death)

all actions require a 1d100

Rolled 31 (1d100)

>>2754333
kill the monkaies and revive the hermit

Rolled 78 (1d100)

>>2754333
>Charge in spraying sparks and clacking for death

This mecha crab does not talk

Rolled 71 (1d100)

>>2754333
Get revenge for our fallen brother

>>2754354
SCUTTLE NOW! SCUTTLE NOOOWW! SCUTTLE FOR WRATH! SCUTTLE FOR RUIN AND THE WORLDS ENDING!

>>2754354
Surging ahead, your little legs piston and hiss with pneudraulics. A flurry of sand is kicked up as you come hurling out of the forest like a tiny god of wrath. Sparks fly from your mouth and singe the monkeys at a distance causing them to scatter and abandon the fallen MechaCrab. (haha. bit of french wordplay there) Three of the monkeys are unlucky enough to get on the bad end of your pinchers and are promptly dismembered while the rest scatter rushing up into the trees.

Little spears are thrown, some land near you; exploding with a degree of violence you had not expected. Deep pockmarks and pits erupt across your body from the little explosive spears as the tiny bastards rain down hell on you. They are faster than you, but you are more armored than them, and they have limited spears...hopefully.
----
>Weather the storm and eat the fallen as you wait, see how they feel about that.
>Climb the nearest tree and sew terror into their hearts.
>Fuck that, cut down the nearest tree, they are barely two inches around.
>Drag the broken crab back into the undergrowth for examination

Roll a 1d100 for any action.

Rolled 22 (1d100)

>>2754388
>Fuck that, cut down the nearest tree, they are barely two inches around.
FUK YO TREES!

Rolled 23 (1d100)

>>2754388
>Fuck that, cut down the nearest tree, they are barely two inches around.

Rolled 99 (1d100)

>>2754388
>>Drag the broken crab back into the undergrowth for examination

This Mechrab escaped with his companion.

>>2754398
Does this mean that we'll be able to figure out how to repair mechacrab?

>>2754404
>>2754398
If we can repair it and can't control it, then we just consume it. CONSUME IT LIKE THE REST

>>2754406
I want a friend. at least one. what's the point if we kill everything?

>>2754418
Existence is suffering. sometimes. Also i'll be honest. This quest is almost a shitpost, partially tongue in cheek, and mostly throwing shit at a wall and seeing what sticks. 100% just for fun. there may be party members down the road if we keep going.
---
Looking up to the treetops, your rational mind takes hold. They are fast, far up, and you are a crab. Fuck this. Scuttling over to the MechaCrab you quickly take hold of it and expertly drag it towards the tree line in a snaking twisting motion, avoiding spears and managing to fully collect the tiny corpses of the fallen monkey warriors. The weighty metallic body of your fallen prize does not slow you down as it carves a path in the sandy undergrowth of the mangrove forest.

The shrikes and indignity of your tiny foes soon fades as louder screeches replace them; the little monkeys are driven off by large bats, and by driven off, they are brutally captured and killed in flight after putting up an honorable fight. Several bats eat explosive spears and fall crashing to the jungle floor below, as you bear silent witness to it from the safety of your impromptu underbrush dwelling. Your mechanized stomach rumbles.
----
>Those are pretty big bats...lets drag them back for eating.
>Nah, fuck that. Lets eat the double down on this crab.
>Snack on the tiny monkey corpses while we look over the crab.
(1d100)

>>2754464
>Those are pretty big bats...lets drag them back for eating.
GAIN SONIC POWERS, GET WINGS, DRINK BLOOD- Oh wait that's only for Vampire Bats.

Rolled 38 (1d100)

>>2754468
>>2754464
FUG FORGOT MAH ROLL!

Rolled 14 (1d100)

>>2754464
>>Snack on the tiny monkey corpses while we look over the crab.

Rolled 88 (1d100)

>>2754464
>Double down
>EAT THE MECHA CRAB

>>2754549
RIP mechacrab

>>2754549
Thats a lot of fucking bats, you pontificate. The meat will probably still be there when you are done with your thing, which is what you will do now. Taking a moment to gaze at your steely meal, a thought comes to your mind. This Hermit crab is old. It peaked out at only a slightly larger and heavier size than you are now. Clearly the Coconut crab is the superior species. The crab master race if you will.

You end up eating the monkey corpses anyway, which is just as good because it gives you a moment to look over the fallen crab. It is much more heavily built than you, and made of different technology. *SNAP* you cut into it's claws and legs, wires and fluid spilling out like spaghetti from your pockets. Corroded metals and scrap, with some sort of adorable mini gun popping out of it's shell, broken and limp. *CRUNCH* That shell though. That is tough. Heavy too. Most of the daylight hours are spent ripping apart and consuming the sturdily built MechaCrab. You find yourself tired again, too tired to stay awake. Curling up into the soft detritus of the forest, you go into standby mode and are greeted by the upgrade menu.

Well...This is new, these are not the old choices.
---
Fallen MechCrab integration options:
>Double size, improve all aspects.
>Gain Minigun, Armored shell, and wrecker claw. reduce agility.
>MechaCrab: C0rrp|_|t3d Dat@

>>2754584
>>Gain Minigun, Armored shell, and wrecker claw. reduce agility.

This!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Pls

>>2754584
>MechaCrab: C0rrp|_|t3d Dat@

Mystery box stop trying to seduce me with mystery!

File: This-crab-can-bench-press(...).png (1.13 MB, 1200x630)

1.13 MB PNG

>>2754300
>Leave my quest until you can find a picture of a crab holding a pencil.

>>2754584
>MechaCrab: C0rrp|_|t3d Dat@
got to keep doing the random stuff

>>2754586
the the quickest on the draw, the prize.
>>2754588
Lament not. It was a double flamethrower on each claw. A clear rip off and nod to fire snek.
---
As you wake up, you feel HEAVY. Once shiny metal is now salt pitted and matte. Crust rimes around your environmental seals as you look at a truly massive claw, You damn near have to drag the thing. How do fiddler crabs make this look easy? Eye stalks rotating about you look over the rest of your body. Your body is now covered by a thick series of plates. Its not a true shell like the hermit crab, but it certainly is an improvement over your thin metallic carapace. Rusted red, you look the part. The final detail is a cruel looking if somewhat tiny minigun and integrated ammo canister sitting just over your right "shoulder". 3 tiny barrels with a triangular flash cage menace the world as you spin it around on loud servos, cutting down a fluttering butterfly in the prime of it's life. This is fucking sweet. Your hud shows a minor reduction in ammunition...as the moments pass it slowly begins to tick up in number. Regenerating ammo. Super Sweet.
>>2754594
>is this a pencil, a crab spear, or a thinly veild attempt at crab pornography?!
ERROR! ERROR!

>>2754613
You convulse violently, as if someone created a truly impressive shitpost on 4chan. Legs spasm as your vision goes involuntarily blank. Alone in the black, the only choice is MechaCrab: C0rrp|_|t3d Dat@. You try to run, but have no body. The text glitches and tears, coming closer and closer....How nightmarish.

Waking up you feel HOT. Your primary claws look like heat blackened steel, brilliant fire blues sporting further up your arm. Then you realize, you have twin flamethrowers on each claw. Snaking pipes run up and into your shell. Oh yes. yes.
--
You are now the size of a cantaloupe, and equipped with appropriately sized flamethrowers, minigun, and an impressively large wrecking claw, and the ability to spit sparks. On the downsize, in the time you were down, it would seem all your dead bats were eaten by something else.
---
>Start torching the forest. (1d100)
>Ponder life. (1d100)
>Rampage (1d100)

Rolled 73 (1d100)

>>2754613
Hey QM, would it be possible to let us know when the votes are called in? Because one other anon did for for the other choice.
Or is a first come first serve deal?

>>2754623
>Ponder life. (1d100)
To Crab, or not To Crab. That is the question.

>>2754623
>>2754613
Well disregard my earlier question because I should have actually waited till you were done writing.

Rolled 72 (1d100)

>>2754623
>Ponder life. (1d100)

>>2754624
>>2754643
You stop to think about all of this. Its really insane, this whole situation. Sort of better than what life was before. You were doing nothing. But is this what you wanted? Maybe not. But its not like you knew what you wanted either. Unconsciously you scratch your head with your normal sized claw in a crude approximation of thought.

*boom* The monkeys are back. In greater numbers.
---
>Head back to the beach and conquer it (1d100)
>Scuttle more inland (1d100)
>Give the monkeys hell (1d100)

Rolled 48 (1d100)

>>2754689
>Give the monkeys hell (1d100)
BURN BABY BURN!

Rolled 66 (1d100)

>>2754689
>Reenact the jungle firefight scene from Predator.
>Unleash Ol'Painless

>>2754689
>Give the monkeys hell (1d100)

Rolled 14 (1d100)

>>2754709
It would help if i rolled huh.

>>2754701
Raising your claws high to the sky you unleash the full wrath of your tiny minigun as you sweep it through the treetops as if to say "COME ON! DO IT! DO IT NOW!!!" The small simians, not expecting this suffer casualties, the previously metallic crab is now a metallic crab of death incarnate. Small bodies rain down, softly thumping against the jungle floor as others run away in fear.

Scuttling up to eat your prizes, you realize something. They are wearing tiny clothes, and have...tiny guns. One of little guys crawls along, dragging limp legs before he rolls over at you. A little tube no bigger than a McDonald's straw is clutched in it's hands as it fires off a tiny RPG. The unexpected attack smashes into your face, blowing off an eye. Like an angry crab Prometheus you simply spew flames from claws, the shrieks of the creature short lived.

Snacking on the dead, you are at a crossroads.
---
>Press on into tiny monkey territory.
> Move inland.
>Go beach.

>>2754733
>Press on into tiny monkey territory.
Let's see if we can get an extra level up from them

>>2754733
>Press on into tiny monkey territory
EXTERMINATE

>>2754733
Since we got self repair, our eye is going to grow back, right?

>What do?
Go exterminate!

>>2754733
>Press on into tiny monkey territory.

If possibru. Make a tophat out of monkey fur

>>2754752
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mfQkZU3MVm8

Its a strange thing, this forest. As you press further into the monkey's territory, trees are spotted with small huts who's windows slam shut. Curious faces of children are pulled in by fearful parents. As they should be. Death has arrived. maybe? probably. You are still feeling this out. There are strange little trails that gradually give way to tiny paved roads. with small vehicles. You always wanted to be Godzilla as a kid, now you are Ebara. or close enough. Fuck that Prawn. You are your own Kaiju. If a very small one.

It would seem this is the sticks. As you wander on through a tiny downtown complete with adorable diner; which you crush, you stop to feed on the rubble. Already your eye is starting to repair. From the other eye stalk you see slivers of tiny copper wiring poke through. hmm. This place is interesting, with many things to eat. A few of the tiny creatures run about, clutching children or belongings, fleeing for their lives.
---
>Consume gas station.
>Attempt to interact with power lines.
>Keep eating vehicles.
>You are a mighty crab and you see a tiny highway far ahead poking up in the undergrowth. Their meticulous infrastructure will be their undoing.
>Wanton slaughter

>>2754765
>Consume gas station.
We must get extra fuel for our flamethrowers.

>>2754765
Slaughter

>>2754770
We are murdering the fucking Lilliputions (is that how you spell it?)

GODZILLA FANTASY GOOOOO.

Eat that Gas station

>>2754777
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=myqSETD5_bs
The Holiest of Holies trips shall have their Motherfuckin Crab Rock.

>>2754777
+1

Trips demand it

File: monkey-thumb_2131000i.jpg (64 KB, 620x620)

64 KB JPG

>>2754777
Behold. Your enemies, the sapient finger monkeys.
>>2754770
>>2754771
You continue to rip apart the scale model sized gas station. Girders and fuel pumps are greedily consumed, sparks flying out before a small explosion engulfs you in fire and billowing black smoke. The locals cheer before immediate despair sets in. You are Injured but it is but a setback, if you had purchased that environmental hazard this fire would be no biggie. Still. Your systems are hardened, and the damage is superficial. You sup at flaming gasoline like a mother's milk; internal repair systems compensating for damage.

Soon you wade out of the pool of fire, like a crabby demon exiting a portal from crab hell. Little monkey people scream and point, while a valiant monkey sheriff and his deputies fire at you ineffectually. Letting loose a gout of flame that consumes the little town's main street, the defenders fall.

You spend the next hour incinerating and ripping apart the town, eating corpses and structure alike, the work is hard, and soon you feel weary. It is time to slumber, perchance to dream. or upgrade. upgrade is good. As you start to dig a basketball sized pit in the town center, you notice a tiny helicopter shooting at you, there are more in the distance.
---
>Dig deeper, you will kill them later.
>Mini-Gun.

>>2754798
>Mini-Gun.
DAKKA-DAKKA-DAKKA!

>>2754800
With a contemptuous sweep of your mini gun the tiny helicopter is brought down like you would swat a dragonfly. Not that you ever swatted them, they were cool. These are less cool. You make out a sheriff's star as it crashes into the ground, its crew engulfed in the subsequent fireball. Soon what are obviously newcopters swarm above you, agile pilots evade most of your fury, and soon you are out of ammunition. A few more helicopters downed, they remind you almost of old GI-Joe toys. You feel a momentary pang of regret for this, but then remember the fuzzy little fucks started it. Digging down into the black soil of the forest, you are soon covered, and have blotted out the light. Pushing yourself into slumber, you are greeted by another unfamiliar menu.
----
<make your selection> 2 points available.
Size: 2 points.

Hardening: 2 points

Laser: 1 point

Missiles: 1 point

Booster: 4 points

Flamethrower+: 2 points

Minigun+:2 points

>>2754808
>Hardening: 2 points

>>2754808
>Missiles: 1 point
>Save the other point for later

Missiles? Why thank you I will take those!

>>2754811
>>2754814
Conflict! It seems that you must now roll. Highest roll wins. New voters are not only allowed, but encouraged. No democracy here, just the might of the dice!

Rolled 12 (1d100)

>>2754817
FUG

Rolled 5 (1d100)

>>2754817

>>2754819
Lucky you!

>>2754819
Concluding rolls in 5 minutes or so.

Rolled 71 (1d100)

>>2754814
+1

File: 1515884265611.jpg (185 KB, 1125x640)

185 KB JPG

>>2754821
I have no idea how it happened, but I hope you'll get the next high roll.
Because that seriously should not have gone in my favor.

Rolled 24 (1d100)

>>2754819
As you rip up from the damp earth, you realize two things. It is night,and you are surrounded by tiny little tanks about half your size, with a group of helicopters flying overhead.

Your damaged eye is fully regenerated, and on the back of your wrecking claw are a series of little holes about the size of pencil erasers, about 10 in all.

A small barrier is erected around your pit, and a few tiny cars with tiny monkeys are shouting at you through a loudspeaker. No one has shot you yet.
---
>Attempt communication 1d100
>Attempt Murder. 1d100

Rolled 35 (1d100)

>>2754840
>>Attempt communication 1d100
"RUDIMENTARY CREATURES OF BLOOD AND FLESH, YOU TOUCH MY MIND, FUMBLING IN IGNORANCE, INCAPABLE OF UNDERSTANDING."

Rolled 57 (1d100)

>>2754840
>Attempt Murder. 1d100

KILL KILL KILL

>>2754840
>>Attempt communication 1d100
Attempt flirting.

Rolled 59 (1d100)

>>2754845
Forgot the dice.

Rolled 95 (1d100)

AH FUCK IT GO MURDER!

>>2754844
>>2754846
>>2754849
My emotions...vs DC24 vs 95
---
For a long moment you stand there, watching the emotions play over their faces. Despair and anger, hope, frustration. You Snap your claws rhythmically in thought, the analogue of tapping fingers. They attempt to communicate with you in vein, faithfully emulating the beat back at you. In that last crystalline moment of silence you expend all your missiles, spew fire and sparks, and unleash a torrent of minigun fire. The devistation washes out ahead of you, behind you, all around. In the crimson glow of fire and death the tracer fire of your minigun cuts into the sky like a serpent of light. As your ammo counter reaches zero, the burning carcasses of mangled helicopters fall to the ground, adding to the total ruination of the small town. The illusion of your size is momentarily broken as you look up to see the mangrove canopy. You could consume the wrecked military vehicles, or march onward towards the tiny monkey highway.
---
>+1 point, 1 point banked. 2 total.
>A guardian of the children; Gamera, you are not.
---
>Clean up around "town"
>Attempt to feed on the electrical lines as well
>Press on for new experiences

Rolled 58 (1d100)

>>2754857
>>Clean up around "town"
Make sure that we're extra thorough

>>2754860
+1
My thoughts exactly

Rolled 12 (1d100)

>>2754857
>>Clean up around "town"
Erase it from existance.

>>2754857
Eat the vehicles!

We might be able to get some wheels or helicopter blades or something to make us more mobile!

Rolled 16 (1d100)

>>2754857
Clean up

>>2754875
Who knows? We might be able to make ourselves into a Tachikoma from Ghost in the Shell!

>>2754860
Who's a hungry crab? You are. The next few hours are spent consuming the town, the wrecked military vehicles and even the infrastructure underneath it. Despite packing it all away, most of it seems to just vanish into your mass, your hunger unabated.
>+1 point

While you were consuming the town, the local highway was cleared of civilians and the monkey military has been busily setting up a new line of defense. It's been hard gauging their level of technology, but it seems to be based around the 1960s or so. Still, there is an entire race of small monkeys that will not genocide themselves. That much is for sure.
---
>Head on into the highway, claws and fury
>Play it smart and attack from a distance
>A static defense is one easily bypassed, just walk around the shit and follow the highway to a nice juicy city.

Rolled 44 (1d100)

>>2754883
>A static defense is one easily bypassed, just walk around the shit and follow the highway to a nice juicy city.
It's like they don't even into tactics.

>>2754883
>A static defense is one easily bypassed, just walk around the shit and follow the highway to a nice juicy city.
>Wave as you go past.

>>2754884
>>2754887
You almost feel bad for the defenders. The city they seek to protect is yours for the taking as you simply go around their kill zone. Even for a powerful crab like you, that might have been fatal; but you are not a stupid beast. No. You are a NEET, who is a crab, who had sex, sort of! Fuck everyone!

The highway is devoid of activity, but just down the way you see the hints of what could generously be called sky scraper. Stretching 12 feet tall and 4 feet wide, it is the first of several dozen that dot the miniature monkey metropolis. If you could dig in there, they wouldn't be able to root you out easily. oh no. oh yes. The faster moving vehicles behind you, small jeeps and helicopters, attempt to slow you down. They are simply cut down by your minigun as you dont even deign to face them. Your weight and claws ruin the highway, turning it into an endless tank trap to which their heavier vehicles resort to taking gradually more and more ineffective potshots at you. Soon you are upon the city limits, and how bright it glows. Little people scream and run in terror.
---
>Charge in and burrow into a building.
>Assault from a distance with everything you've got
>Arson. Start as many fires as you can.

1d100s. please.

Rolled 18 (1d100)

>>2754900
>>Arson. Start as many fires as you can.
BURN
EVERYTHING

Rolled 10 (1d100)

>>2754900
Arson

Rolled 88 (1d100)

>>2754900

>Arson. Start as many fires as you can.

Crispy monkey snacks

Rolled 80 (1d100)

>>2754900

Rolled 86 (1d100)

>>2754906
And just like that you begin the ruination of about 200 square feet. Walking down the main street you liberally torch each building you pass at the ground level, feet punch holes into the street and sewers below. Somewhere along the line you hit a gas main and the real fun starts as manhole covers launch into the sky followed by beautiful gouts of flame. You look up to the canopy above you and manage to see a few stars through the foliage. If only you could be there...An idea strikes you as you climb the biggest building in the city. Claws and feet punchture into the structure, mangling its side while ultra thin glass falls down like crystal snow. Below you tides of the local denizens riot and seek to escape their urban death trap. You always were afraid of cities, you knew their existence was fragile, but on /pol/ they called you a fly over blue collar fag. Jokes on them, you never had a job! The climb takes several minutes, and you are somehow winded; but all the same here you are. Atop the highest building in the city. Roughly 20 feet up. Pretty impressive view. you snap your claws in idle thought before spewing arcs of flames down onto the buildings and population below. A sense of giddy madness overtakes you, something very primal likes this. As minutes pass by the dozen, you see several bursts of dirt within the city, a few buildings topple, and Challengers have appeared. (rolling for defense forces)
----
>Gained 3 points for a total of 5.
---
>Spend points before the fight.
>Meet your enemies now.
>Snipe your enemies with all of what you've got.
(1d100 please)

Rolled 73 (1d100)

>>2754914
>Snipe your enemies with all of what you've got.
MACROSS MISSILE MASSACRE!

Rolled 56 (1d100)

>>2754914
>>Snipe your enemies with all of what you've got.

>>2754914
>Snipe your enemies with all of what you've got.

Hope they make a movie out of this soon

Sniper crab

>>2754916
>putting my kid to sleep. be back soon.

>>2754919
>Maybe.

Rolled 57 (1d100)

>>2754918
Forgot to roll in my excitement

Rolled 100 (1d100)

>>2754914
>>Spend points before the fight.

>>2754924
Well that settles that then.

>>2752391
BEWARE, this quest may or MAY NOT be based off Snake Report/Whatever Isekai trash that Snake Report was based off. Please contain your personal autism as a fan of any series and refrain from demanding a personalized apology and sexual favors from the QM due to your butthurt at something being similar or based off of one of your favorite intellectual properties.

Now has everyone gotten a can of their snowflake begone?

>>2754924
Save crit?

>>2754914
Spend points.

File: Two Years worth of Semen (...).jpg (151 KB, 1280x720)

151 KB JPG

>>2754924
And like a Phoenix from the ashes you roll the Nat 100.
I approve.

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>>2754919
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8mHKHKR8x6A
You fire your entire supply of missiles in a massacre of sorts, the offending dirt cloud explodes once more, and surely whatever was inside is dead. But it is not.

It is pic related, and apparently it specializes in missile warfare. (your roll did not beat mine.)

In response to your flurry of missiles, it releases a deluge of missiles that are now streaming towards you at high speed. Its fury of response makes yours seem pale in comparison.
----
>Fuck. jump.
>Fuck. slide down the building with your claw.
>Attempt CWIS with your minigun. Screw this guy. This is your perch.

(1d100)

>>2754924
whoops. didnt see that. now im putting my kid to bed, but rest assured, you are going to get a small prize for that beauty.

Rolled 36 (1d100)

>>2754928
If Op allo... Looks like it didn't mattered.
>>2754932
Thanks for beliving in me.

>>2754933
>>Attempt CWIS with your minigun. Screw this guy. This is your perch.

Rolled 97 (1d100)

>>2754935
Thank you QM, even I believe he has earned it.

>>2754933
>Fuck. slide down the building with your claw.
SURF'S UP!

Rolled 20 (1d100)

>>2754933
>Fuck. slide down the building with your claw

>>2754933
>Fuck. slide down the building with your claw
lets walk away we have had our revenge now

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>>2754937
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G9xzhyp431c
You were not agile, and you were not meant to escape the swarm of missiles like you did; but somewhere deep in your crabby mind an idea did form. You would slide down the side of the building to which the missiles were NOT coming from like 1 smart boi...and smart you were. As the building got peppered from an impressive assault, you shredded the side of the building in your escape, carving a furrow in the glass and steel. From this angle you manage to get a good view of the city and in the distance see yet another Mecha Crab coming in for battle.

This is getting a bit hazardous, but at least that one does not seem to be a ranged combatant like missile crab. As you hit the street level you make a quick decision to burrow into the base of the massive building, and spend your points. The darkness overtakes you and the ever mutating option menu presents it's latest offerings like the a devil in a suit.
>>2754924
>+5 fucking points for a total of 10 available points
----
10 points

Size: 2, 4, 6
>Increases size and overall stats.
Hardening: 2, 4, 6
>General improvements to armor and environmental resistances
Laser: 1, 2, 3, 4
>Its a fucking laser.
Booster: 4, 8
>Some sort of rocket assisted jump
Missiles+: 1, 3, 4,
>More numerous and powerful missiles
Flamethrower+: 2, 4, 6
>improving the pyroclasticitiy of your weapons. surely this word is not made up.
Minigun+: 2, 4, 6
>Bigger? Better?
Spark breath attack+:1,2,3,4

>>2755174
Hardening 4
size 2
Minigun 4

>>2755174
>Size. -2
>Hardening. -2.
>Laser. -2.
>Minigun. -4

B A L A N C E D B O I

>>2755213
>>2755203
>>2755174
GIVE ME DUELING DICE. HIGHEST ROLL WINS. UNLIMITED PARTICIPANTS.

Rolled 38 (1d100)

>>2755215
CURSED DICE GOOOOOOOOOOOOO

>>2755203
also worth note is that you have to chew through each level of upgrade, cant skip. so hardening 4 would be a total of 6 points.

>>2755216
FUCK

>>2755219
I decree that new sleections based on this ruling
>>2755215
>>2755219
will allow for new rolls.

Rolled 67 (1d100)

>>2755219
feck

minigun 2
size 2
Hardening 2,4

Rolled 15 (1d20)

Size 6
Hardening 4

When will you guys learn hUGE>!>!>!>!

Rolled 28 (1d100)

>>2755238
Whoops. Wrong dice

>>2755219
AH. fixing

Size. -2
>Hardening. -2.
>Laser. -1.
>Minigun. -2
>Spark Breathe. -1
>Missiles. -1

For a total of 9 Points spent.

>>2755174

Balenced crabbo 2: I want laser
Size 2
Hardening 2
Laser 2
Missiles 1
Minigun 2

Total should be ten

Rolled 52 (1d100)

>>2755241
Trying again!

Rolled 65 (1d100)

>>2755242
For laser justice

Rolled 1 (1d100)

>>2755174
>>2755215

>Size: 2
>Hardening: 4
>Missiles: 1, 3

Macross Missile Massacre is GO!

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>>2755286
Y'know I'm pretty proud of my crit fail.
It feels... Symbolic.

>>2755286
Bathe in our own blood!

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>>2755286
I am both impressed and horrified

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Now that I think about it: I wonder if it will be possible to gain access to Autocannons, Lightning Guns and Railguns.

>mfw my King Crab Battlemech fantasies may come true yet.

>>2755305
I aim to please.

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>>2755234
>>2755234
https://youtu.be/l7ZlSHGFfdc
What went into the building is smaller than what explodes out of it. Almost twice your prior size, you are a clanking, grinding pile of heavy armor, industrial machinery, and destructive potential. Your minigun now sports long barrels and a bigger ammunition pool for extended bursts of brrrt at a longer range. Compared to you, the other two robots are crablets, and like all crablets, they must die.
---
>>2755286
<this is your fault>
Soaring overhead, as if to mock your robust and powerfully built frame which is not overweight at all...is another fucking mecha crab. It seems the tiny monkey self defense forces were prepared for this day. Immediatly it tests your armor with a long blast of laser. Your back glows red from the build up of heat, but due to a wise choice of upgrading armor and survivability, the damage is superficial, leaving a shallow furrow in place of a grievous rent. Alright. Fuck these guys.
---
>Minigun the flight crab
>Missile the flight crab
>Evade and hunt down missile crab
>Ignore all crabs and continue your rampage.
>Other?

1d100 plez.