Rolled 3 + 3 (1d20 + 3)

>>1489962

Rolled 12 (1d20)

>>1489962
>Naruto Run
>Why do I have to fight my own populace, when I could be having a good ime, tumbling all of my wives at once?

12+7=19

You manage to get to the other side and flank the town hall... Two communist werewolves seem to be guarding this door...

Roll me a 1d20+4 to take care of them!

+3 if you can come up with a brutal way to beat up/kill werewolf communists!
+2 if you can also be angry you can't be back home with your wives.
+1 if you can also warm up a bit.

Rolled 11 (1d20)

>>1490074
Smash their heads together so hard you can't tell which is which
Fuck these communists! They fucking take up my fucking time, fucking up my fucking time reserved for fucking my fucking beautiful fucking wives!

>>1490081
Oh, and set some clothes on fire for us to wear as it burns

11+10=21

You bash their head together until it's little more then brain matter on your chest. You steal their clothes nad set it on fire so you can wear it to stay warm and comfortable, and you kick down the door inside the town hall...

A rather confused communist sniper sniffs the air and sees you...

Roll me a 1d20+4 to fuck up this sniper.

+3 if you can come up with a way to absoutely brutally kill this piece of shit!
+2 if you can miss one of your wives in particular and think lustfully.

Rolled 3 (1d20)

>>1490085
Stab him in the chest with his own gun, then shake it all about
I just want to go home and use Elizabeth as 2 giant pillows

Rolled 10 + 4 (1d20 + 4)

>>1490085

10+9=19

You lunge forward and grab his rifle and try to impale him with it, but he dodges to the side and stabs you in the leg with a knife!

It hurts a bit, but nothing to get worried about. He's disarmed too...

Actions

>Cast a spell?
>Attack him physically!
>Use his gun against him!
>Scare him into backing down.
>Write-in

>>1490092
>>Attack him physically!
We have horns for a reason

Roll me a 1d20+4 anon.

+3 if you can come up with a more brutal attack.
+2 if you can just think how fucking foolish it is to actually oppose you with your track record.
+1 if you can think how your wives probably miss you and how you just fucking want work to be over with.

Rolled 11 (1d20)

>>1490097

Rolled 10 (1d20)

>>1490097
Start the horn at the bottom, and move so fast that it cuts all the way through
I've killed in the thousands and what are the odds that anyone who isn't the white death is going to kill me?
They are probably worried that I am going to freeze or get shot up and killed. I just want to get some sleep and forget about all of this

10+10=20

You gore him and disembowel him with your horn, and continue on. You enter the main room and find a machinegunner and a few normal guys just firing...

Roll me a 1d20+5 to clear house.

+3 if you can find a way to take care of the machinegunner and other guys without the rest noticing.
+2 if you can scare the shit out of them.

Rolled 5 + 5 (1d20 + 5)

>>1490107

Rolled 5 (1d20)

>>1490107
Cut of their heads and store them on our horns for safekeeping
Say boo right before you kill em?

Allowing a samefag if you can scare them a bit more.

Rolled 11 (1d20)

>>1490112
Make a chittering noise like a xenomorph

>>1490114
How about roaring. I'm not sure if Ren can make that noise.

11+10=21

You roar right into their ear, and quickly beat the shit out of them and rip their heads off and attach them to your fucking horns like a barbarian...

You move up the stairs into the main room and find two guards who look at you, and are well, quite scared.

Actions

>Kill them too.
>Walk by, they're not exactly going to do shit.
>Scare them off.
>Laugh demonically!
>Write-in

>>1490125
>>Laugh demonically!
>Kill them too.

>>1490125
>Walk by, they're not exactly going to do shit

Rolled 2 (1d2)

Rolling.

1=Walk by
2=Kill them too.

Roll me a 1d20+4 to kill anons.

+3 if you can find a way to brutally kill them and terrify them.
+2 if you can be pissed they're making you spend time away from your loved ones.
+1 if you can make them thankful you aren't in your dragon form.
+1 if you can terrify them using the "heads on horns" shit.

Rolled 16 + 4 (1d20 + 4)

>>1490173

Rolled 5 (1d20)

>>1490173
Beat a motherfucker with a motherfucker
"Lightly" stomp on their legs
Take one off, and use it as a ventriloquist's dummy

>>1490204
What do you mean by a ventriloquist's dummy?

File: giphy.gif (480 KB, 350x263)

480 KB GIF

>>1490210
A ventriloquist puts a dummy on his hand and converses with it, while also speaking for the dummy. A good ventriloquist doesn't even appear to be speaking

16+8=24

You beat the living shit out of the two guards before making one of them into a ventriloquist's dummy, your head firmly implanted through their head.

You go into the "mayor's office" and go inside to see...

An elf.

And the mayor.

The mayor himself is being held hostage, with the elf holding a gun to his head. You can clearly tell that the elf is a "communist" judging from the red beret and is clearly a misguided teen.

"Get any closer and I'll shoot him!" The elf yells.

The mayor himself seems to be old, and quite "plump" and is a werewolf, remarkably. You find it somewhat comedic.

What do with this hostage situation?

>Beat the shit out of the communist elf anyways!
>...Try to convince him to put down the gun?
>Cast a spell?
>...Try to talk about how you have a son like him? Try to guilt trip him!
>Write-in

>>1490229
Sleep pheremones

>>1490236
This.

Roll me a 1d20 to see if this works.

+2 if you can try to find other ways to make him sleepy.

Rolled 7 (1d20)

>>1490243
Sing a lullaby

>>1490249
No, that'd only work if you were Elizabeth.

Rolled 14 (1d20)

>>1490256
Sleeperhold?

Also does anyone have a problem with wasting a few million to get a flying yacht? Maybe design our own or something?

http://www.messynessychic.com/2014/04/24/all-aboard-the-flying-yacht-circa-1950/

They just seem cool as shit, plus a nice way to travel with our family.

>>1490269
We are no-where near that tech level. Now if we went to WW2 dimension and got anti-grav tech, then sure!

>>1490275
That plane they are talking about is from the 1950's and was a modified surplus WW 2 plane.


We can do better.

Didn't deem samefagging anon.

7

Your sleep pheromones put the mayor to sleep, but not the elf... He seems naturally resistant.

"What the hell? Why did he fall asleep?"

The elf seems a bit confused by this...

Actions

>Cast a spell.
>Attack!
>Try to persuade him?
>Try to intimidate him?
>Shapeshift.
>...See if there's any demands?
>Write-in

>>1490282
It was an accident.
>Cast a spell.
That one ice thing that traps people

>>1490282
>Write-in
"So, can we just talk for a moment as I am really curious as to what the fuck you expected this minor revolt to achieve.

I mean, was there an actual goal or were you all just suicidal?"

"So, can we just talk for one moment? I'm really curious as to what the fuck you expected this minor revolt to achieve. I mean, was there an actual goal or are you just all sucidial retards?'

"I erm... I don't know?"

"...You don't know. Why the fuck don't you know?"

"I erm... I mean, I just heard that we were supposed to do it..."

It's quite clear this elf knows nothing.

"Why the fuck did you join a bunch of communist retards?"

"Because they're for equality against the dragon, you know?"

"Aren't you already equal?"

"Yeah right! He thinks we're lower than dirt!"

"Really now? He thinks that, even though he has a bunch of fucking elven kids? One he can't even say hi to without his mother being pissed at him, and another practically being fucking adopted? Do you fucking think you know me at all? I have at least two kids with elven blood and somehow you fucks find a way to paint me as "the evil dragon overlord who wants to pull genocide for the laughs" or some fucking shit, you goddamned communist little spoiled piece of fucking shit..."

"Wait, your re-"

"YEAH I FUCKING AM AND YOU ARE A FUCKING PROBLEM RIGHT NOW SO SHUT YOUR FUCKING MOUTH!"

He does so, as you take a breath.

"Now, why the fuck do you think you can overthrow a practically immortal dragon overlord. My wife would fucking murder you, hell all of them would if you even laid a hand on me, and they're a fucking giant breasted dragon, a very muscular minotaur, and a fucking vampire. You would be so fucked to even think you can take me on..."

"I erm... I mean, erm... We were drawing you into a trap."

You laugh uncontrollably.

"A TRAP!? YOU FUCKING THINK A TRAP WILL ACTUALLY DO ANYTHING AGAINST ME!? I will have you fucking know I can turn into an eighty story dragon, fuck your mother so goddamn hard she'll be craving more. Why do you mortals even THINK you stand a chance against me?"

"I erm..."

"...Now, what the hell is this trap, and make it fast. I don't feel like talking all day."

"I-I mean, why would I?"

Actions

>Tell me before I stop giving a shit and kick your ass.
>You know what? Nevermind. I'm just going, the army can deal with this shit.
>...A trap. Fucking commies.
>Take a deep breath, and calm down.
>Write-in

File: carlos.jpg (6 KB, 225x225)

6 KB JPG

>>1490309
>>Tell me before I stop giving a shit and kick your ass.
>...A trap. Fucking commies.
Is he... a trap?

>>1490309
>Write-in
"So I can find out who in the fuck thought a communist revolt against my rule was a good idea, show them it wasn't and so you can walk out of here with two legs that work instead of being dragged out as a cripple."


>>1490320
He is a male elf. So essentially.

>>1490269
We're dragons. A flying yacht would be redundant.

>>1490309
>Take a deep breath, and calm down.

>>1490330
By that logic we also shouldn't bother with having any cars, yet we often take trips in cars so we can travel in relaxing comfort with others.

Also, we are quite slow when it comes to flying, if we get good jet engines and a sizeable fuel tank on the plane then we could potentially travel faster than we can fly ourselves.

Lastly, it serves as a status symbol and a way to covertly travel the world by comparison to the fuck off huge dragon.


There are more reasons but that should be enough.

>>1490331
Cars and and fucking airborne yachts that require special research/construction are not the same thing

Again, more expenses that we don't need

>Lastly, it serves as a status symbol and a way to covertly travel the world by comparison to the fuck off huge dragon.
A large metal ship is not covert and a considering there are only a dozen or so dragons in the world, many of them our family, we're already a symbol of power by ourselves.

>>1490352
>Cars and and fucking airborne yachts that require special research/construction are not the same thing
Again, we haven't got to do much to make a airborne vehicle like this: just make a large jet bomber and convert it by turning the bomb bays and such into living quarters.

>Again, more expenses that we don't need
See you say that but we have a large surplus of money per month and easy ways to get more. Such as selling these to the rich.

>A large metal ship is not covert
It is compared to a dragon, especially if we make these things commercially for sale to the rich. Then it's just some millionaire on holiday. This is before mentioning that we could use it to prototype stealth coatings and other such things, making it far harder to spot outside of the old MK 1 spectra interpreter and MK 1 acoustic detection array.

>we're already a symbol of power by ourselves.
True but we aren't the right kind of symbol of power. This is classy and luxurious. We are strong and barbaric.

Rolled 13 + 4 (1d20 + 4)

>>1490378
If I remember right, passenger planes have existed for twelve years, give or take.

"So, who the fuck thought a communist revolt against my rule was a good idea? Show them it wasn't, and you can walk out of here with two legs that work instead of being dragged out as a cripple!"

"I don't know how!

Ignore my roll anons.

You are half-tempted to break his legs, when you look outside...

You notice something glowing oddly on a roof... It seems to be blue, strangly enough. This gets your attention more than the communist elf.

"What are you doing? Don't move or I blow his brains out!"

Actions

>Deal with the communist elf.
>Try to identify that strange blue glow?
>This must be the trap he's talking about... Take cover! (Kills the mayor!)
>Write-in

>>1490393
These aren't passenger planes OP. Essentially this is a mobile home / luxury apartment but in a plane that can land on water as well as on land.


They are both the dumbest thing ever once you get into the digital age of communication but on the other hand, they sound fun to own and fly.

Plus, the bitches.

>>1490398
>Write-in
"The roof is glowing blue. I think I will be going now and I would suggest you and your hostage do the same."


Then turn around and walk out the door.

"Yeah... Erhm, the roof is glowing blue... I'm just leaving now, thanks."

You quickly walk out the door, and as you go outside, you hear commotion, and communist and fascist turn around...

You turn around too, and see a erm...

A large robot. The building which was glowing blue seems to have vanished... Or was it that thing?

You notice that a large TV screen turns on... And a...

Gerbil is on.

A Gerbil you know as Mr. Squeakers.

It squeaks evily, and it seems to be very, very pissed at you. From what you interpt, it's pissed at you attacking it's home or what the fuck ever and is now going to try and kill you with a giant fucking mech.

Well.

Shit.

Actions

>...Cue large monster fight in your dragon form. Gerbil vs Dragon. Let it begin.
>Yeah, no. Fuck this, let the giant mech just rampage.
>...Laugh at the gerbil.
>Write-in

>>1490415
>>...Cue large monster fight in your dragon form. Gerbil vs Dragon. Let it begin.
cant we just eat it?

>>1490415
>Write-in
"I never attacked your home strange gerbil controlled robot! I think you mean my wife! She's over in England at the moment, I don't suppose we could reschedule this?

Or do you want me to fight you instead?"

>>1490423
It's a sixty story mech, anon.

>>1490427
And we are much bigger. I didn't mean in one gulp. Eat parts of him, and use it as fuel for lazers

>>1490436
I'd assume so, sure.

"I never attacked your home, strange gerbil robot or whatever? I think you mean my wife, in England! I don't suppose we could resch-"

It laughs evily, and shoots a rocket blindly towards a building.

The gerbil pauses for one second, realizing something. He presses a button, and a very mechanical voice comes to mind.

"HELLO. IS THIS WORKING?"

It seems to be angrily typing on a keyboard... Somesort of text to speech program?

It also can't exactly hear you from your position.

Actions

>Shapeshift?
>...If it can hear you, it'll have a hard time telling you who you are...
>...Time to put rulership to the test. Try to delegate it to Elizabeth,.
>Fight the giant mech.
>Write-in

>>1490446
>>...Time to put rulership to the test. Try to delegate it to Elizabeth,.

>>1490446
>...Time to put rulership to the test. Try to delegate it to Elizabeth,.


During the time it is going over there we can get ready to help her in the fight...

Roll me a 1d20+3 anons.

+3 if you can describe to him what Elizabeth looks, sounds, and probably did.
+2 if you can try to tempt him to not rampage in the local area and INSTEAD rampage in Elizabeth's lands.
+1 if you can try to prevent suspicion by talking about some negatives about Elizabeth. (+1 if you can fuck up and instead just make her sound more appealing... At least to you. Like the slavery...)

Rolled 9 + 8 (1d20 + 8)

>>1490489
"I think you are looking for my wife: English accent, buxom and probably either a human or a white scaled Yuan-ti?

Also, I would point out that my military has been assembled around this town to deal with the revolt and would do some damage to you. So if you could just go peacefully we can avoid doing too much damage to one another."

Rolled 14 (1d20)

>>1490489

If anons want to pass, you just need to do the last of the bonuses.

Also, if you want to pull an ultimiate jew move but require an additional roll, you can try to convince it to go where Elizabeth isn't and rampage. It wouldn't have any ties to your country either.

>>1490518
Her boobs are so big I can barely hold them!

14+10=24

"Well, I think your looking for my wife! She probably has a bit of an English accent, a large... Buxom... Boobs so big I can barely hold them, and probably is either a human or white-scaled yuan-ti. I'd recommend you go to England!"

It seems to think this is a great idea... And presses a button. Large amounts of smoke and fire come from his boots, and it flies up to the heavens...

Holy shit it has rocket boots.

You want rocket boots.

Now...

Actions

>Let Liz deal with the angry gerbil on her own.
>...Maybe you should deal with it. Get to England!
>Write-in

>>1490541
>...Maybe you should deal with it. Get to England!

You decide to fly to England!

Roll me a 1d20+3 anons!

+2 if you can try to think why Elizabeth needs you!
+2 if you can come up with a way to fly faster!
+1 if you can think what would happen if Elizabeth got killed by a giant robot!

Rolled 6 (1d20)

>>1490548

Rolled 9 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>1490548
"Liz will need help, she doesn't exactly do the whole fighting thing as much as I do and her people are far less used to massive destruction of their cities.

Not to mention that if she gets killed then chances are the English will hate me along with my kids..."

Rolled 6 + 3 (1d20 + 3)

>>1490548

Op are you there?

9+6=15

You try to follow... You are however, quite slower than the robot.

Meanwhile, in England...

"Ah, yes... Broiled sheep would be good, along with a touch of buttered bread, some wine... Oh, and a nice helping of salad if you will..."

"My lady?"

"I'm trying to watch my figure, I'll have you know."

"Yes, my lady..."

The servant leaves you as you get your claws done by a few servants, trimming it to perfection... Elegant and deadly! Oh, also great for getting those hard to reach places.

Life's great.

After you have dinner, you feel the ground shake, spilling some wine on your dress!

Actions

>Whoever just caused the ground to shake will pay! Most likely a lecture! Maybe you shaking your head at them! Go outside!
>...Get a new dress first. You aren't a barbarian!
>...Shapeshift?
>Write-in

>>1491059
>Whoever just caused the ground to shake will pay!

You of course, head outside.

Outside, you see a giant mech. Like a gnome mech. Only, HUGE.

Actions

>Shapeshift. It's one of THOSE mechs, probably.
>Charm it? You did charm a robot before.
>Yeah, no. Head back inside.
>...Ask politely what it's doing here?
>Write-in

>>1491444
>Shapeshift. It's one of THOSE mechs, probably.
Fuck Gnomes. They shot at us for no reason

>>1491468
Dragon form, anon? Or something different?

>>1491444
>Shapeshift. It's one of THOSE mechs, probably.

Dragon.

>>1491510
Dragon

You shift to your dragon form...

The mech doesn't seem intimidated at all.

"HI" it says. You notice that on the screen, the Gerbil doesn't seem to be typing the words and seems confused.

That's when you notice this erm... This seems to be the same robot you charmed back at Gerbil's base, but seems to be upgraded quite a bit...

Especially since rocket pods just popped out of it's shoulder.

"SORRY" It says, as the large rocket pods are aimed towards you...

Liz! There's a bunch of civilians nearby! Let's try to lure it to the country!

Actions

>Lure it to the country! (You'll have no cover, and probably get shot a lot. Will mean little loss of human life.)
>...Fight it here. (You'll have plenty of cover, but will mean quite a bit of destruction of property and death of people... Which could bankrupt/ruin Britain.)
>Write-in

>>1491541
Can we lure it towards the North Sea?

>>1491567
...No, because it's faster then a dragon and would really mess you up if you tried evading for a long distance. The sea itself is also a terrible place to be since there is absolutely no cover for you.

>>1491574
To the country side then

>>1491541
>Lure it to the country! (You'll have no cover, and probably get shot a lot. Will mean little loss of human life.)

>>1491585
You sure? Fighting it in the city would be easy, but the country would be rather hard. This guy has a lot of powerful ranged attacks, and Liz isn't the best at combat.

>>1491592
>could bankrupt/ruin Britain.
I think I'll pass. I don't want another blitz so soon

>>1491603
It could, if you really fuck up and destroy the city, but if you can keep damage controlled and not hurt the population, the treasury should be fine.

>>1491612
I'd rather have Liz take a nasty hit than the economy of Britain.

Country it is.

You decide to get it out to the country...

The problem is that once you begin to fly, you hear a loud sound of missles flying at you...

Shit.

Roll me a 1d20+3 to lure!

+3 if you can find a way to avoid or tank the missles.
+2 if you can try to alert the civilian population to this and prevent civilian casulties?
+2 if you can taunt Mr. Squeakers. (+1 if you can threaten him as well with what you'll do to him!)
+1 if you can be rather pissed about the white dress getting wine on it...

Rolled 5 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>1491647
The missiles are probably heat seekig so shooting a ball of fire could throw it off.

You want to do more bonuses anon?

>>1491732
>You fucking dress ruining midget rat cunt. Whatever kind of failed abortion lab experiment you are, I'm going to squash you and turn you into jelly in my hand!

Just waiting for more rolls. I guess if you want to hurry this up you can samefagging by alerting the civilians and threatening Mr. Squeakers.

I'm too tired to do that. Feels like I'm gonna take a nap soon

Rolled 8 (1d20)

>>1491825

Rolled 6 (1d20)

Rolled 2 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>1491825

8+9=17

You open your mouth and breath fire to the missles, causing them to explode. Shrapnel flies and hits you, but does little to nothing... Save for your wings, which has made it a bit harder to fly.

"You fucking dress midget rat tosser! Whatever kind of failed experiment you are, I'm going to squash you and turn you to jelly in my hands!"

The mech at this point follows you, but stops and stomps the ground trying to cement it's position...

A sudden large blue beam of light passes right by you, and incinerates a large hole in a nearby building...

"SORRY. THIS UNIT IS UNDER MANUAL CONTROL. FIRST LAW NOT OPERATIONAL UNDER MANUAL CONTROL." The robot says. It seems to dislike attacking you.

It seems to be somesort of pinpoint laser weaponry.

Actions

>Take cover among the buildings! (Can hurt civilians, but you'll have a high chance to dodge the shots!)
>Evasive manuevers! Fly around, do everything you can! (Low chance of hurting civilians! But a mdoerate chance of dodging.)
>Don't do anything. (You'll have a high chance of getting hit, no chance of civilian injuries.)
>Rush him now! (Bad idea, but if successful will let you do quite a bit of damage.)
>Try to charm the robot? (You'll be highly exposed, but the robot if successful may try to fight against it's manual control... He already is head over heels for you, at least back at the base he was.
>Write-in

>>1492727
>>Try to charm the robot? (You'll be highly exposed, but the robot if successful may try to fight against it's manual control... He already is head over heels for you, at least back at the base he was.

>>1492737
This.

What do anons?

>Try to simply be nice to the robot. Judging from how he's treated... He'd probably like that.
>(Attractive)...Honestly, you are very surprised if this works on robots. Just erm, use your assets?
>(Genius)...Nerd out a bit to the robot. He might like that, it is rooted in mathematics and what not...
>Write-in

>>1492763
>>(Genius)...Nerd out a bit to the robot. He might like that, it is rooted in mathematics and what not...
We don't see enough of this side of Liz

Roll me a 1d20+4 to try and charm via being nerdy.

+3 if you can try to find an excuse to let Elizabeth's inner nerd poke out.
+2 if she can somehow flatter the robot geekily?
+1 if she can mention some of her projects and wonder why she didn't go for robots...
+1 if she can also maybe mention that she doesn't really find the time to be "nerdy" so to speak, with the husband and the kids and the empire...

Rolled 13 (1d20)

>>1492795
What big servos you have
I've tried my hand at building a navy. Why not build an army?

You might want to do the bonuses anon, and this is fairly hard.

>>1492824
Is that a 270* rotating gyroscope mounted to a frontal axiom matrix?!
Give me this, just one time. Even if you don't like it, I never have the chance to let myself out like this. Between my husband and my kids and... her, I am always pulled in other directions

This is good enough to maybe get the robot to reconsider, but you'll still be shot at. If anyone else can roll a bit higher than 15, then you'll get the robot to reconsider and not open fire...

Allowing samefagging if Liz can be embarrased by her nerding out and maybe talk about how it's so improper to do with her husband or kids or anyone... But this is just too fascinating!

>>1492902
I'll try...
Oh, what am I doing? A queen shouldn't bother herself with gadgets and gizmos. But they're so cool!

Rolled 16 (1d20)

>>1492907
Fugg

16+10=26

Your eye catches a glimpse of the shiny gyroscope, the servos, the gismos...

You can't help but pause and observe...

"You know, I must really admit, judging from your size I would estimate you'd have quite the large servos! They've never been my strong point though... Oh my god, is that indeed a two-hundred seventy degree rotating gyroscope mounted to a frontal axiom matrix?! By my word, I am dearly impressed!"

The robot itself is flattered.

"I... AM REPORTING, THAT NO ONE HAS REPORTED THESE FACTS TO ME."

You can tell it's a bit stunned and pauses for a second.

You can't help but hope that it can just give you this, a reason to nerd out... Your husband and kids and... Well, Gwynevere, tend to get in the way of your scientific pursuits...

In fact, this gives you a bit of an idea...

Is it to convince the robot to go home?

...I was thinking more along the lines of a world-conquering army...

Liz! What's with you lately? You've been way too ambitious and violent...

Actions

>It was just a thought, Gwynevere... (No change)
>Is it so wrong to want to rule the world utterly? (Gwynevere will be quite concerned, but Elizabeth will put good efforts towards helping Renexizious in his world conquest... And also might have a bit of a weak point in the future for Renexizious to flirt with her being the "empress of the world". Also will become more ambitious and a bit more ruthless in not letting things stay in her way.)
>What am I saying? I'm not somesort of "Napoleon" or something, I'm a wife and a queen... My first duty should be to my country and to my husband. (Elizabeth becomes less ambitious.)

>>1494436
>It was just a thought, Gwynevere... (No change)

>>1494436
>It was just a thought, Gwynevere... (No change)

Just a thought, Gwynevere.

You turn your attention back to the fight. The robot seems to be attempting to hold back...

Actions

>Attack!
>Try to charm the robot more?
>Try to lure it more out to the countryside!!
>Write-in

>>1494517
>Try to charm the robot more?

File: why not both.gif (976 KB, 350x263)

976 KB GIF

>>1494517
>>Try to charm the robot more?
>>Try to lure it more out to the countryside!!

You decide to charm further...

>(Genius) Be nerdy!
>(Attractive) Be attractive!
>Just try to be nice to it!
>Write-in for more ideas.

>>1494535
>>(Attractive) Be attractive!
Got to give him the good 'ol one two!

Roll me a 1d20+3 anons.

+2 if you can somehow use your assets on the robot? (+1 if you can slight force it to look...)
+2 if you can mention how great the robot was, when he let you by without even harming or touching you, and how sad it is that he has to attack you...
+1 if you can be a bit seductive.

Rolled 14 (1d20)

>>1494551
The classic under arms then reach upwards to stretch
Thanks again that you could be so nice and let me pass back there, too bad that gesture is meaningless now:(
Gently rub our hand down his mecha arm

14+8=22

"You know... Thank you for previously, being so nice and so gentlemanly, letting me pass all the way back there... It's such a shame that you have to attack me..."

You gently rub his arm. He doesn't say anything, but it's clear that his programming is starting to be a bit glitchy, so to speak.

Mr. Squeakers however, does not seem too entertained by this. You also see your husband in the horizon, and he'll be here in about two more turns...

Mr. Squeakers seems to have pressed a button, and the robot twitches a bit, a few sparks flying out of it. It's murderous tendencies seem to have been renegaged, and it's hands move to turn into very, very large gattling guns.

"SORRY. PLEASE FORGIVE ME."

Luckily, he seems to be charmed enough that you get to cover, and he seems purposely firing inaccurately. Mr. Squeakers presses another button shocking the robot again. This time, it opens fire accurately on you, as you try to lead it away from the city...

Roll me a 1d20+4 to see if you can indeed draw it away!

+2 if you can try to find a way to minimize being hit!
+2 if you can try to tell the robot that shooting at you isn't a very good idea! (+1 if you can slightly wonder why this one robot can actually be charmed by you...)
+1 if you can find a way to still look attractive in this pursuit to the robot!

Rolled 11 + 4 (1d20 + 4)

>>1494570

Anyone else anons?

Turn or shift o that the shot grazes us. Alternatively we could try to block it with our tail.

>I am the queen of England. Firing upon any person of the royal domain is a declaration of war

>Maybe the robot just identifies me when I'm in a certain position as a friendly or something.

>>1494610
Just saying that you are rather close to the ground, shapeshifting mid-flight is a bad idea this close to the ground.

>>1494612
By turn or shift I meant our body's position, not our physical form

Rolled 11 + 2 (1d20 + 2)

Ignore my roll.

You manage to avoid the shots, as you turn and twist around. You of course draw it out to the English Countryside, and Renexizious seems to be a mere turn away...

Actions

>Attack the robot!
>Try to charm it further!
>(Attractive) Try to charm and distract it from Renexizious doing a sneak attack right behind him...
>Try to lure him towards a forest so you have cover?
>Write-in

>>1494633
>Try to lure him towards a forest so you have cover?

Roll me a 1d20+4 to see if you can make it to the forest!

+2 if you can look attractive to the robot while you make your way to the forest!

Rolled 4 + 4 (1d20 + 4)

>>1494649

Allowing samefagging if you can either look attractive to the robot or alternatively scare Mr. Squeakers about what you'll do to him.

Rolled 7 (1d20)

>>1494665
I'll tie you up and dangle you in front of a myriad of wild African cats to the point that they'll pluck off every single piece of hair on your body while trying to get you

Want to do the "look attractive" samefag?

Rolled 7 (1d20)

>>1494649

Rolled 13 + 4 (1d20 + 4)

7+4=11

You try to lure the robot, but rather than follow he fires plenty of missiles right at you.

Ignore my roll.

You take 2500 in damage from the missiles, which severely injured you!

He switches back to fire the accurate beams you dodged earlier...

Lost HP: -2500
Current HP: 7500

What do anons want Renexizious to do?

>Surprise attack!
>Fly around... Elizabeth can handle him on her own...
>Find something to eat to charge up Solaire!
>Breath attack!
>Try to reason with him?
>Write-in

Elizabeth

>Attack!
>Flee!
>Attempt to dodge!
>Charm him!
>(Attractive!) Charm him and distract him so Renexizious can have a very clear shot!
>Write-in

>>1494707
>Surprise attack!
>(Attractive!) Charm him and distract him so Renexizious can have a very clear shot!

Roll me a 1d20+4 to charm and distract!

+3 if you can use your assets right up close to him to distract!
+2 if you can be seductive as Elizabeth...
+2 if you can find a way to expose him to Renexizious...
+1 if you can try to get him to stop shooting at you for a second...

Rolled 20 (1d20)

>>1494731

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>>1494739
Does Liz level up assets?

>>1494731
Trip and cusion our impact with him
Give him the sultry eyes
Grab him into a hug, and lightly spin so he moves out of cover
It's not very nice to shoot at a nice lady, or a friend!

What do anons want to do?

>Have the robot too stunned to actually do anything for the next three rounds!
>The robot can truly feel love, but this really pisses off Mr. Squeakers. Might get you a gnome mech behemoth, but Mr. Squeakers will inspired to take revenge in the future.
>The robot shuts down, but also self-destructs due to a glitch in his programming. This will lose all tech, and Mr. Squeakers will go after you, but it'll end the encounter instantly!
>Write-in for ideas.

>>1495034
>>The robot can truly feel love, but this really pisses off Mr. Squeakers. Might get you a gnome mech behemoth, but Mr. Squeakers will inspired to take revenge in the future.
And also wants revenge against Squeaker

>>1495059
Scratch that, I'll go for the first one but the robot will still feel something burning in his "heart"as it will get very awkward because Ren is right around the corner,.

>>1495034
>Have the robot too stunned to actually do anything for the next three rounds!

You trip a bit (somehow) and ram into him, cushioning your fall with him. You stare face-to-face, albeit you are quite a bit larger then him. You give him some rather curious (yet sultry eyes, and grab him in a "hug" so you can get up a bit.

He seems stunned...

Renexizious flies by...

Actions

>Continue with attack!
>...Liz seems to be doing good. Hold back.
>Write-in

>>1495144
>Continue with attack!

Renexizious swoops to attack the beleaguered mech...

Actions

>Aim at the head!
>Aim at the arms!
>Aim at the legs!
>Aim at the chest!
>...Use magic!
>Use a breath attack!
>Write-in

>>1495201
>Aim at the head!

Roll me a 1d20+2 to attack the head anons.

+2 if you can angrily find a way to attack!
+2 if you can tell it to get the fuck away from your wife!

Rolled 19 + 2 (1d20 + 2)

>>1495222

19+2=21

You attack him right in the head, and this surprises him enough that you tear through quite a bit of plating with your claws. This staggers him, and he still seems stunned... You don't think he's doing anything for this turn either.

Elizabeth

>Charm him further! (If done enough, you might even get him on your side!)
>Distract him with your charm more!
>Don't do anything...
>Attack!
>Write-in

Renexizious

>Attack!
>...Fly back up, and try to launch another surprise attack!
>Cast a spell!
>Shapeshift!
>Use a breath attack!
>Write-in

>>1495338
>Attack!
>Attack!

Waiting for one more vote anons.

>>1495338
>Attack!
>Attack!

Where do anons want to attack! Select for both Liz and Ren.

>Head (Damaged!)
>Chest!
>Arms!
>Legs!

>>1495427
Liz head
Ren legs

Roll me a 1d20+2 for Elizabeth's attack.

+2 if she can come up with a creative way to attack it's head!
+2 if she can use her assets!
+1 if she can also express gratitude towards Renexizious being here!

Rolled 12 + 2 (1d20 + 2)

>>1495481

>>1495502
You want to do the bonuses anon?

>>1495481
Use our tail.

"Thanks Ren! I'd like to finish this quickly and your assistance odd to make such a goal practical."

12+5=17

You attack, and your tail slaps the robot back a bit, and your husband comes in to capitalize right on it's legs...

Roll me a 1d20+5 anons!

+3 if Renexizious can find a way to damage the robot's leg!
+2 if Ren can of course, mention how worried he was, and how relieved he is.
+1 if Ren can also slightly lustfully flirt with Liz while beating this guy up.

Rolled 18 + 5 (1d20 + 5)

>>1495575

If you can do the bonuses, you can increase the damage you'll do to the leg.

>>1495608
Use our special tail to impale it's feet/legs sideways

>I'm just relieved that you're already. I was worried this machine might've overwhelmed you before I got here

You use your tail and impale the leg, while expressing your gratitude towards Elizabeth...

The robot seems to be no longer stunned from the among of damage it's taking, and is now fighting in self-preservation. It's finding it somewhat hard to walk...

Liz

>(Attractive) Try to stun with your good looks!
>Distract him for another attack from Ren!
>Attack!
>Don't do anything!
>Write-in

Renexzious!

>Attack!
>Try to fly back up for another attack!
>Cast a spell!
>Shapeshift!
>Breath attack!
>Write-in

>>1495678
>(Attractive) Try to stun with your good looks!
>Cast a spell!

>>1495713
Care to specify with the "casting a spell" part?

>>1495718
Cast a lightning bolt. Hopefully it's powerful enough to melt through the plating.

Elizabeth tries to stun him with her good looks...

Roll me a 1d20+4 anons.

+3 if Elizabeth can really use her assets on the robot...
+2 if she can try to conceal it from noticing Renexizious's spell.
+2 if she can apologize for attacking it, and mention how she's just scared about him attacking her...
+1 if she can be seductive...

Autosuccess if everything can be done.

Rolled 19 + 4 (1d20 + 4)

>>1495727
I would go for an auto success but fuck that's too much mental gymnastics for me

>>1495745
Seems the dice gods are willing to let it slide this time...

19+4=23

Elizabeth accidently rams into the bot, her large breasts going straight into his face, and they look eye to eye.

Elizabeth seems thoroughly embarrassed and stammers out an apology, and the robot tries his best to apologize...

Renexizious of course, casts a lightning bolt right on him...

Roll me a 1d20+5 for damage anons.

+3 if Renexizious can be fucking pissed he just embarrassed his wife AND had her breasts right in his face... That's for you, damn it!
+2 if Renexizious can try to get Elizabeth away from the lightning strike's conductive nature without alerting the robot!
+1 if Ren can intimidate the robot a bit.

If everything's done, Liz won't also get shocked!

Rolled 3 (1d20)

>>1496222
I see you are ramping up the incentives
>She's my wife goddammit! Only I can embaress her or have her breasts in my face!
>ooklay outay orfay hetay ightningay
>I you touch her any more, I'll rip out the closest thing you have to a dick!

>>1496230
Only because I'm tired.

Anyways, allowing samefagging if you can continue to rant about how much you hate people messing with your wife and how she's yours, goddamn it.

>>1496239
She's my wife, and only me (and my other wives) can touch her!

Rolled 11 (1d20)

>>1496254

>>1496258
Want to rant more/intimidate the robot?

Rolled 2 (1d20)

>>1496282
I WILL NOT HESITATE TO PUNCH YOU IN THE HEAD SO HARD YOU ONLY THINK IN BINARY!!!

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>>1496295

11+11=22

Your lightning bolt does a bit of damage on the bot, but seems to do little else...

The bot turns it's full attention to you, and prepares to fire at you with some rockets...

Renexizious

>Attack!
>Attempt to dodge!
>Cast a spell!
>Shapeshift!
>Breath Attack!

Elizabeth!

>Charm the robot further! (If done enough, he might join your side!)
>Try to prevent him from hurting your husband!
>Don't do anything!
>Sneak attack him from behind!
>Write-in

>>1496303
>Breath Attack!
Fire

>>1496305
You have to choose for Liz too anon.

>>1496313
>Charm the robot further! (If done enough, he might join your side!)
Oops

Liz decides to charm the robot further!

Roll me a 1d20+4 anons.

+3 if you can continue to make embarrassing mistakes to attract the robot?
+2 if you can be slightly seductive?
+2 if you can "attempt" to get your husband to stop fighting?
+3 if you can use your assets.

Autosuccess if everything happens.

Rolled 19 (1d20)

>>1496325
>Stub our toe, then grab it and jump up and down in pain
>Lean heavily on the robot for support
>Ren, it's not the robot's fault! Just the gerbil's
>See 1
What is the date at this moment?

>>1496334
Anon, Liz doesn't exactly have a toe, she's in her dragon form. She's also flying.

>>1496338
Unless dragons just have a solid mass of flesh with talons fr feet, I am pretty sure they have some form of toe.
>cough a lot and get the jiggle going

19+12=31

You use the good old fashioned tactic of having a severe cough, and it's enough to cause the robot to turn to face you...

Renexizious meanwhile, breathes fire on the robot.

Roll me a 1d20+3 anons

+3 if Renexizious can be a bit pissed at Elizabeth trying to stop him.
+1 if Ren can try to sneak a peak at Liz's coughing fit.

Rolled 8 (1d20)

>>1496358
Why the fuck are you protecting him! He came here to attack you!
We have 3 heads. One of them is bound to have a good angle

Allowing samefagging if Ren can slightly think why Liz's assets are so great.

>>1496394
They are the largest assets I have ever seen and are extremely comfortable

File: feeling_silly.png (66 KB, 518x659)

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Rolled 12 (1d20)

>>1496399
What is wrong with me

12+7=19

You breath fire on him, which heats up his circuits a bit... He however, even though being stunned, fires at you...

Alternatively, Liz can risk herself to try and charm him further.

>Liz will risk herself!
>Take the hit!

>>1496409
>>Take the hit!
She is already hurt and it is entirely our fault

Rolled 17 + 4 (1d20 + 4)

You decide to take the hit.

17+4=21

The rocket barrage targets your face, and holy shit it fucking hurts... The pain is unreal!

In fact, your nerves, having barely registered pain in the past, now are practically flaring from the pain in this battle...

Roll me a 1d20+4 anons. This is to see how well Ren can handle the sudden onset of pain...

+1 if he can think about what's at stake here!

File: EVERYBODY HAPPY.jpg (8 KB, 488x488)

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>>1496417
THATS A GOOD SIGN!

Rolled 14 (1d20)

>>1496421
Elizabeth is in danger, not to mention ourselves!

14+5=19

You can shake it off, but your body's practically screaming at you...

-4500 HP.

Current HP: 13,500 HP Dragon Form
Full HP: 18,000 HP Dragon Form

You are very injured from the close-up barrage!

The robot himself seems to have weakened armor plating by the front. He seems very distracted by Liz however... It seems to be preparing another barrage of rockets to your face!

Ren's Actions

>Take cover!
>Attack!
>Try to cast a spell!
>Use magic!
>Write-in

Liz's actions!

>Attack!
>Charm further!
>Try to prevent your husband from being shot!
>(Genius)You are flanking him... Maybe there's some way you can disrupt Mr. Squeaker's manual control?
>Flee!
>Write-in

>>1496435
Attack the location of the rockets
>(Genius)You are flanking him... Maybe there's some way you can disrupt Mr. Squeaker's manual control?

>>1496435
Ren's Actions

>Try to cast a spell!
Or
>Use magic!

Can I get a list of spell / magic options as well?


Liz's actions!

>(Genius)You are flanking him... Maybe there's some way you can disrupt Mr. Squeaker's manual control?

>>1496446
Fuck I'm tired, I added two of the same things.

Anyways, magic should be in the limited character sheet.

>>1496449
So I need to go look it up? Christ that too much effort for seven in the morning...

I know we have fireball and magic missile or something of the sort. So just throw a few of them his way.

>>1496455
I'm too tired to.

Roll me a 1d20+4 to see if Liz can disable Mr. Squeaker's manual control from behind...

+2 if Liz can think what she's looking for...
+2 if Liz can try to think what the fuck she'll do to Mr. Squeakers once she gets ahold of him..
+1 if Liz can worry about her husband.

Rolled 7 (1d20)

>>1496459
Anything that looks like an antenna or a wireless transmitter
Feed him to her corgi
He doesn't normally react to being hurt! Whats going on?!

Allowing samefagging if Liz can continue to think of how to deal with an annoying gerbil...

>>1496465
Sell him to a school and have him live out the rest of his days as a class pet.
After reducing his intelligence of course

File: duuuuuurrr.png (25 KB, 669x514)

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Rolled 1 (1d20)

>>1496478

>>1496479
Perfect timing for a rage

So...

>Use Scottish Rage!
>Don't use it!

>>1496485
>>Use Scottish Rage!

Roll me a 1d20 anons

+3 if you can curse Mr. Squeakers wildly in Scottish.
+2 if you can think why the fuck a robot has fallen head over heels for you... (+1 if you can take pride in it!)
+2 if you can continue to get the robot to be attracted towards you again...
+1 if you can be somewhat angry that Ren and the robot have taken a slight break to look at your assets! (But also slightly enjoy the attention.)

File: good night.gif (493 KB, 450x338)

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Rolled 18 (1d20)

>>1496499
I am too tired to do these write ins. If the next part isn't written by the time I wake up, I will do them

Rolled 1 (1d20)

18

Well, holy shit anons have actually succeeded.

You angrily curse and rip out some fucking antenna on the top of the robot. This of course messes with the robot's primary functions...

Ignore my roll.

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>>1496509

The robot twitches, and falls over after you rip it out. The back panel opens up, and a plethora of steam just erupts, and you feel extremely sick...

Inside seems to be a glowing green crystal, and you feel sick just being there. It seems like this robot is powered by uranium, and combined with the electric shock and you messing with the primary functions, has caused a sort of "meltdown" in it's reactor...

The robot seems disabled, and you notice that the uranium seems to be glowing a bit more brightly as you look at it...

Huh.

"...NUCLEAR MELTDOWN EMINENT. PREDICTED IN TWENTY HOURS. SYSTEM UNABLE TO FUNCTION REGARDING EXTREME INTERNAL INJURIES."

A bit of genius sparks into your brain... It seems Renexizious's lightning bolt was TOO effective! Why would the Gnomes need to deal with lightning underground?

You have discovered Gnome Mechs are very weak to lightning and sudden bursts of energy.

"...MANUAL CONTROL DISABLED. RETURNING TO AUTOMATIC MODE."

Actions

>...Try to finish off the robot?
>Try to stabilize the uranium?
>Deal with the uranium?
>Get Renexizious to deal with this!
>Maybe you can bury it underground?
>Write-in

>>1496514
>Try to stabilize the uranium?


Thank fuck I know just a bit about reactors, eh?

>>1496514
>>Get Renexizious to deal with this!
UPGRADE!
Also have we done anything with the mana crystals we stole. I had an idea for some science with them. Make a version of Renexium that, instead of producing chemical energy, produces mana.

>>1496520
I'll back this instead I guess...

Good night for real this time

>>1496541
See you later!

Renexizious barges over to deal with the uranium...

What do?

>Stabilize it. (The giant death robot survives. You get access to some Gnome Tech.)
>...Nom the uranium? (Death Robot dies unless more enriched uranium is given to it, and Renexizious (Or Elizabeth!) gets an upgrade of your choice. Might cause some severe sickness and a mutation or two.
>Try to bury the crystal below the surface... (Stops the meltdown, kills the robot, and gets you some tech.)
>Write-in

>>1496608
>...Nom the uranium? (Death Robot dies unless more enriched uranium is given to it, and Renexizious (Or Elizabeth!) gets an upgrade of your choice. Might cause some severe sickness and a mutation or two.

>>1496613
Do you want to get Liz or Ren to eat it?

>>1496614
Ren

Waiting for more votes anons.

>>1496629
Other anons did appear in favor of Ren eating the uranium

>>1496629
Ren eat it

>>1496629
Yeah I am also in favour of it.

Alright.

You of course, can't help but nom the uranium...

Choose an upgrade...

>Upgrade something! (You can upgrade something regardless of points needed to be invested, like instantly upgrading huge!)
>Stable Mutation
>Unstable Mutation
>Ultra Unstable Mutation

>>1496685
>>Upgrade something! (You can upgrade something regardless of points needed to be invested, like instantly upgrading huge!)

>>1496685
>Upgrade something! (You can upgrade something regardless of points needed to be invested, like instantly upgrading huge!)

>>1496689
What's one thing anons want to upgrade instantly anons? This will immediately upgrade it to the next level.

>>1496690
YUUUUGE

>>1496690
What does shapeshifting get vs HUGE?

>>1496693
Shapeshifting gets you the ability to do a chimera form. This requires a upgrade point to be invested into it though.

>>1496694
Well I'll go with YUUGE then. How many upgrades to it though allow us to change our appearance at will though?

>>1496694
Shapeshifting.

>>1496697
Two more above Chimera.

Anyways, YUGE it is...

So...

>100 Stories
Or.
>120 Stories (Minor drawback from radiation!)
>140 Stories! (Major drawback from radiation!)

>>1496701
>>120 Stories (Minor drawback from radiation!)
If we take this we are taller than the Empire State Building

>>1496701
>120 Stories (Minor drawback from radiation!)

Rolled 1 + 3 (1d20 + 3)

Alright. Ignore my roll.

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>>1496711

Rolled 18 (1d20)

You now have...

>Overly Sensitive Nerves

Your nerves are now extremely sensitive to damage or touch, and someone hitting you can deal 1.5x as much damage... At least temporarily. After a bit the damage will go back to normal, but if it does kill you you'll suffer "sensory shock" and die from it.

Ignore my next roll...

You are slightly weaker to ballistic weaponry, due to your plates thinning out.

However, you are now offically larger than 100 stories... In fact, a whopping 120 stories!

Of course, Liz is quite shocked by your sudden growth...

Actions

>Taunt Liz about this...
>...Embarrass Liz a bit.
>...Laugh evily from the power you get from this.
>Pat Liz on the head.
>Just shrug. This is nice.
>Write-in

>>1496714
You see this! This is why we don't consume the deadly radioactive materials!

>>1496724
>Just shrug. This is nice.
How tall is Liz?

>>1496728
80 stories, if I remember.

>>1496724
>>Pat Liz on the head.

>>1496724
Also I wouldn't call "getting 2 weaknesses" minor

fucking as dragons just got a lot more difficult.

>>1496737
We are only 50% larger than her

>>1496738
That is still a WHOLE lot of dick that will no longer fit.

You pat Liz on the head thanks to your new size. She seems quite stunned.

"Your kidding me. How does that even work?"

"I don't know."

Elizabeth seems a bit fumed. But anyways, there's a bit of a dying robot in front of you...

Oh, also, your pretty sure you can eat this guy whole. Just as a thought.

Actions

>Nom the bot. Maybe more radiation? (Upgrade again. loss all tech.)
>Try to charge the robot again?
>Rip him apart and look at the tech...
>Write-in

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>>1496740

>>1496742
>>Nom the bot. Maybe more radiation? (Upgrade again. loss all tech.)
Must... Not... Munchkin!!!
And we can steal the tech later from Squeakers.

Well, I'll be back soon.

Roll me a 1d20+4 to see if there's enough left-over energy to give Ren an upgrade.

+3 if you can come up with a way to nom the robot... And of course, be angry at him for hitting on your wife/shooting at her.
+2 if you can slightly go mad with power from being the tallest living thing on earth...
+2 if you can make fun of Liz's shortness... (+1 if you can also flirt with her a bit.)
+1 if you can think about what this radiation will upgrade...

Rolled 9 + 4 (1d20 + 4)

>>1496754
What if Liz eats it

Rolled 7 (1d20)

>>1496754
Angrily cut him into bite size pieces while cursing his existance
HehehehehehehehHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA
I don't need you having stumpy leg to be taller now!
Huge again?

Allowing samefagging if you can continue to think about what to do with this power!
Also, maybe make fun of Liz a bit more and be condisending...

Anyways, if anons want, they can take a -3 on another upgrade and try to save some for Liz.

Rolled 8 (1d20)

>>1496779
If i am HUGE, then no-one can ever overpower my YUUUUUUGE!!!
Pick her up and rock her like a baby