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/qst/ - Quests

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Previous threads:

Last time, a clueless (and very autistic) man named Alagos escaped from prison and immediately launched into a life of crime, stealing from armored trucks and kidnapping succubi. At least he has a single willing friend.
>>1433669 #
"Oww... hey, Krystal. Look what I can do."
Your chest expands again.
Krystal doesn't seem to know what to do. She just sits in a chair and rests her head in her hands.
"...are you okay? Was I too blunt?"
"Alagos. Put those away, please."
You do so. Krystal stays in her chair.
"Uh, can you get some cereal?"
"Why don't you? I'm trying to contemplate what I just saw, and you need experience buying things."

>[]Guess there's no cereal, then...
>[]Its an actual switch thing, here, I can prove it--
>>[]Its an actual switch thing, here, I can prove it--
Drive her to the brink, then join her.
No bully.

>I wonder if I can CREATE cereal?
"I'm good."
"No, look. See, it just shrinks and--"
Krystal grabs you and starts smashing you into the wall.
You try to create a box of cereal. If you have the power to do so, it's being disturbed by Krystal's conniptions.
"I see you're having issues, I'll just go eat the cereal myself, okay?"
You hurry out of the radio station, stepping over your tripwires.


You pull up to the nearest 7/11 and walk in.
Dirty aisles, bleary-eyed people. Pretty standard fare. Fortunately, they have some cereal in stock.
Some lady enters, her kid's wailing and causing a ruckus. You frown and turn back to the cereal, trying to astrally taste the flavors.
An explosion from the front of the store hurls you into the corner. Three guys step through the broken wall as the dust clears, kicking at shelving units.

>[]Whip up some wind and ambush them.
>[]Run in and rough 'em up.
>[]See if the guy at the desk will still let you buy cereal.
>>[]See if the guy at the desk will still let you buy cereal.
You're on a quest, a quest for CEREAL!!
>[]See if the guy at the desk will still let you buy cereal.
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The assailants turn their guns to you as you frantically dig in the wreckage for your purchases.
"Oh, thank God. Here it is."
The cereal is safe. You grab several boxes and run up to the counter.
"How much is this?"
"$17.93..." the cashier replies, in a daze.
You transfer the money.
"Hey, what the hell do you think you're doing, freak?"
You turn. The assailants are approaching you.

>[]You almost hurt the cereal. You must die.
>[]Ignore them.
Do be careful, there were explosions and there is rubble all over. At least the cereal survived.
>Eat some cereal, look down in horror at what you've done, then leave.
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You dive to the ground and start crawling toward your car. The assailants look around and begin firing at you as soon as they determine there aren't actually any explosions.
You dodge the bullets and clamber into your car, looking bug-eyed out the window before crunching some Rice Krispies and driving away.


>[]Krystal, I brought cereal!
>[]The 7/11 got robbed while I was there.
>[]Krystal, get your gun, those pieces of shit got my paint job.
>>[]Krystal, I brought cereal!
All the cereal, and someone tried to kill the cereal, how barbaric.
>Krystal, I brought cereal!
"Krystal, I got cereal! Someone tried to kill me for it..."
You walk down the hallway.
"Krystal? Did the shotgun get you..? If it did I'm really sorry."
She walks out of your room.
"I'm fine. What's this about people trying to kill you for cereal?"
You explain what happened.
"God dammit, Alagos. Can't you value civilian lives over cereal for once..?"
"Nope. Want some?"
She pours a handful in her mouth.
"So yeah." she says, swallowing the flakes.
"You're an SJW's simultaneous wet dream and hell. Good for you. I'm totally gonna suck on your tits later, that's all I really care about."

>[]Please don't.
>[]I'm fine with that.
>[]You can use Sasha anytime you want.
>>[]I'm fine with that.

>>[]You can use Sasha anytime you want.
"Well, that's great, but you can use Sasha anytime you want..."
"Well, she's fun, but not as fun as taking a woman's virginity. Which is pretty much what I'm gonna be doing, so..."
Well, you see her point.
"So, what're your plans for today? I don't have any jobs, so I thought I might as well see if you're doing anything dumb."

>[]I'm bringing some furniture and appliances in here. Like a computer. And an actual bed.
>[]I was just planning on cuddling with Sasha all day, but feel free to join in.
>[]Krystal, you should know I don't plan ahead for anything.
>[] Other
I was gonna go girl mode to hijack your cam show, maybe spread my asscheeks or something, and turn back into a dude when it looks like the chat lurkers are really getting into it.

>[] Other
I was gonna go girl mode to hijack your cam show, maybe spread my asscheeks or something, and turn back into a dude when it looks like the chat lurkers are really getting into it.

Blow there minds with this
Everything they wanted is a lie
LOL. Supporting
Unanimously voted.
Krystal cackles.
"While that sounds hilarious, I'm not gonna let you use my show. Because I'm earning money from it. Do your own if you want."
Well, maybe you will. The equipment shouldn't be an issue... probably. It's not as expensive as your car, so it's perfectly fine. You might need some money, but that's the great thing about your job...
You take a look at Runner.net.
Another job from Rìnir. Cool, easy money.

>[]Read it.
>[]No time for that, you need a bed and computer equipment. And you have to rewrite that 'ON AIR' sign.
>>[]Read it.
Then get a computer.
Let's see...

Enter the Hanzai medical testing facility at the supplied location. The indicated room in the northeast contains the server hub. Copy the data on it and send it to this number.
Your payment will consist of $50,000 and whatever you take from the facility.

Sounds easy enough. Unless all the patients have heavy weaponry, which they probably do. Fucking Bond villain companies.
You take a few hours browsing PC building forums before settling on a good mid-range model.
It'll be here in a few hours.

>[]Well, might as well go fuck up some sick people and security guards.
>[]I've got a few hours. You can violate me now, Krystal.
>>[]I've got a few hours. You can violate me now, Krystal.
Might as well get it out of the system now, it might be distracting if you don't.
"Here, get it over with."
You take off your armor and change back.
"...Krystal, you're drooling."
"Wha? Oh."
She wipes her mouth off and pushes you into a supply closet. She unzips her leathers and starts griping you.
"I got something from Sasha... this is for being an annoying fuck."
"Ummm--oh! Not so hard! Go slower! A-ah, FUCK!"


Krystal's face is buried in your chest. You can hear her chuckling as she fingers you.
"Wow, you REALLY like girls."
"I just like to take charge with women. Hey, can I plug your--"
"No, I'm not nearly that comfortable yet."
You change back to male form.
"Aww. Well, muscly body, squishy body. Both are fun."
She gives you a kiss.
"I'd offer to let you have some payback, but I think your computer just got here."
You put your clothes back on and go check. Yep, it's here.
You set it up on the soundboard desk thing. You'll have to use your cot as a bench of sorts, but it works. And you've got Ethernet.

>[]Play some games.
>[]Go on that mission.
>[]Make yourself into a body pillow for Krystal.
>>[]Go on that mission
Money first, then shitposting.
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"Well, I'm off to go steal things. Wish me luck. And don't touch my computer."
"Too bad. I'll be sure to download some high quality porn for you."
You sigh and go get in your car.


You park and look up at the building. Concrete, not much to look at.

>[]Bullshit your way in as IT. (D20)
>[]Sneak in through a window.
>[]Run in and kill everything.
Rolled 14 (1d20)

>>[]Bullshit your way in as IT. (D20)
Hey, we're an electrical engineer, we don't have to bullshit.
Well, we engineer electrical storms anyway.
You walk up to the door and buzz it.
"Who is this?"
"Heard you had some problems with the servers?"
"It's about time, we've been waiting for months! Get up there, already!"
The door slides open. You walk through labs full of scientists watching PowerPoints, studying chemicals, and writing in notebooks. One guy in a hazard suit runs past you carrying a box of worms. You don't want to know what that's about.
You get up to the server room and make sure nobody's around before downloading the data and sending it. Easy peasy.
You press your ear against the door. You can hear someone talking...
"--at the door? But we've already got someone here to fix them."
"Was he wearing a uniform?"
"Well, not really..."
"Cripes, you let in a mercenary! Call security!"

>[]Sneak out. You were never here...
>[]Well, this shotgun's gonna get some use.
>[]Wait, was this Mars or Hanzai, I can't tell the difference. (D20)
>>[]Sneak out. You were never here...
Are there vents?
Ar are we gonna try to turn into a lightning bolt?
Lets try to turn into a lightning bolt.
That sounds profoundly stupid. But funny.
Maybe we could put ourselves in the pocket dimension and go out of it at home though.
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You morph into a bolt of electricity and leap at the outlet.
Aaaaaaaaaa this is so confusing traveling in 3D.
That place only has fluorescent lights.
You're going there to get your bearings.
You pop out of a light fixture and adjust your helmet. That was weird.
The room you're in seems like some sort of a cell. Minus a toilet, or bed. There's nothing but the light, really.
You can hear a choked sob from behind you. You turn around.
A heavily bruised, naked woman lies curled in the corner.
"Please... no more. I don't know what you want, just leave me alone..."
She starts crying.
You're not at all prepared to deal with this.

>[]I'm just gonna go...
>[]What happened?
>[]Ignore her.
Try and rescue her?
Krystal wanted us to think of the civies.
Either make a path of destruction out, or take her with us through the electrical lines.
Try the electrical lines.
You look down and try to make her into electricity.
Okay, it was worth a shot.
"I'm not here to hurt you. I'll get you out of here, okay?"
You throw your cloak around her.
"Come on."
You lift her onto your shoulder and kick the door down, looking down the hallway.
Nobody here. At the moment, anyway.
You run over to the elevator and get inside. Before you can press the ground floor button, it starts moving.
The door opens up. A surprised scientist looks down at you before scrambling for his radio.

>[]Slit his throat.
>[]Choke him out.
>[]Run. Just RUN.
>>[]Slit his throat.
Decapitate him.
You stab the guy through the neck and get moving. He probably deserved it.
"What... no, don't..."
The woman starts crying again.
"I'm sorry. These people did bad things to you, didn't they?"
"No... it was the monsters..."
You peek around the corner.
"There he is! He's got a subject!"
You run, slashing tranquilizer darts out of the air. A guard tries to stop you, you sever his arm, take his rifle and keep going.
You jump into your car, put the woman down in the backseat, and gun it.
"Hold on, I'm gonna have to lose them."


Your car drifts to a stop in an abandoned dock house. You run and close the door before checking walking back to your car. The woman's sat up and wrapped your cloak around her more tightly.

>[]You okay?
>[]What did you mean by monsters?
>[]Can you tell me your name? Address, information like that?
>[]Leave her alone, she's traumatized.
>>[]What did you mean by monsters?
>[]Can you tell me your name? Address, information like that?
>[] Other
Oh wait. Weren't we here for, like, computers or something?
"You mentioned monsters... what happened?"
"They kept me in there... did things to me. It h-hurt. They were scary, had glowing eyes. Some of them almost looked human."
Demons, probably.
"Can you tell me your name? Do you have anywhere you can go?"
"My n-name's Pris. I can't remember anything before the cell."
You rub your forehead.
"My name's Alagos. You're safe now, Pris. It's gonna be okay, I'll take you somewhere safe."


You park and get out of the car. Pris has fallen asleep.
"Hey, A--not another one, dammit."
"Shh! She's sleeping. I found her in a cell... I think she was raped by demons."
"Oh, Jesus... get her inside, I'll make sure she's okay."
Krystal runs a scanner over her.
"She's good. Life signs normal."

>[]Her name's Pris... she doesn't have anywhere else to go.
>[]What would they want to use her for?
>[]Order some beds. These cots are starting to irritate.
(You extracted the data just fine)
Make a bed. An electromagnetic suspension hammock using iron particles in a magic field causing a thick material thing to hover like a fancyass water bed.

And stitch some uguu anime bitches into it. If it turns out our anime bitches look more like puddle people, incorporate the Kilo pillow.
Hold on let me just go smoke some weed to understand the principles
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You take some bars and use electromagnetic forces to hold them up, building a be on top of the frame via Home Depot parts. It takes a while.
Finally, you stitch your masterpiece.
"How's that bed coming--god dammit, I can't have sex in that!"
"Exactly. It's so you leave me alone with my waifus. I'll need to get myself body pillows for my favorite ones."
"And who are they?"
"Priscilla-chan, you, Sasha, Rem--"
"Christ, its more pillow than bed!"

>[]Shh, they'll be upset.
>[]Hey, I should put a stripper pole in here! (Then suggest more weird/funny shit to do around the place)
>[]I'll make a bed just for you, if you want.
>[]Shh, they'll be upset.
>Check out the biotech files
Pull out a recorder and ask if she'll help make it more lifelike. Ask her to repeat after you and then start making moaning sex noises in your girl form voice without actually shifting the rest of your body.
>>[]You okay?
>>[]What did you mean by monsters?

>[]Hey, I should put a stripper pole in here!

That also doubles as an quick easy drop out of the room
>>[]Hey, I should put a stripper pole in here! (Then suggest more weird/funny shit to do around the place)
I wonder if it would work if it was sideways?
How bout a robowaifu? With lasers and antigrav thrusters?
>>1437133 (you won the D3 toss... oh goody)
You close the door and sit down, clearing your throat.
"Krystal, I need your help recording something. Repeat after me."
You sigh, press RECORD on your commlink, and change your vocal cords.
"What the fuck is wrong with you?"
"Too many things to count. YAMETE! OOOHHHHH YEEEEAH FUCK ME HARDERRRR Krystal you're supposed to repeat after me. Hey, don't leave! Awwww."
You mentally visualize the stripper pole you want. Maybe you could put some kind of weird trapdoor to let you go downstairs. Or make it sideways. Nah, that'd probably give you nausea even if you could find someone who pulled it off.

>[]Well, off to Home Depot for a neon pole.
>[]Go get food. It's about lunch.
>[]Shitpost online.
>>[]Shitpost online.
We got the money, lets shitpost.

>[]Well, off to Home Depot for a neon pole.

mybr shitpost about the pole idea?
Do the genderswap camehore show. Make sure to acquire a motorcycle helmet for it and write "NOT KILO" on the forehead in permanent marker. Also write "100% USDA certified waifu" on your ass. And be really clueless with the stream. Like if one of them says to play with your tits, be all confused and ask why and then do weird shit like bat it like a cat while doing some 'tistic laughing.
>>1438131 (I made a thread for it, so I guess...)
You ponder what to post online before settling on a topic. A quick image search layer and you're good to go.
(For suptg posterity, it's a thread on /ck/ about how cereal is the best food)
Yeah, that'll do. Now time to watch the sparks.

(I'll write for the other responses, in the meantime defend the sanctity of cereal. Assuming people care)
I don't know how to crosslink.
I think that is how it's done?
Tripple arrow right, then the board symbol? And then the number.
>Agree with the 2 types of cereal, but disagree with the banana oatmeal part.
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>>1438258 (+999999999 AUT, Alagos now recieves free Steven Universe merchandise weekly)
You buy yourself a helmet and some other necessary equipment before stripping and starting your first stream up.
"Hey, guys!"
>[F4gg07]I suppose a footjob is off the table 4 this bitch too
>[Pu$$iboi]Stfu I wanna see her masturbate
"Oh, well. If you want!"
You grab a dildo and slide it inside yourself, squeaking in time with the thrusts.
"Ooooooh, shoot your goo my dude!"
>[MrCaine]she can't be serious in sharing this shit
You somehow manage to climax.
"Did you guys like that?"
>[Hom3grown]it was... interesting
>[bobbo]please do more I'm dying
You angle the camera to look at your bed.
"Oh, Kilo-senpai... I'm so squishy please take me!"
>[SemenOfDong]M E M E W O R T H Y
You start pounding your ass, as well. Feels... really good.
You squirt all over your computer screen.
>[Chin-chinchilla]oh wow
>[MrCaine]if you weren't so squeaky I'd fuck you so hard
>[Kilo]...eheheheh. I have interesting fans, don't I.
>[Kilo]Please don't.
You turn off the stream. Krystal bursts in several seconds and closes the door.

Explain yourself.
"Am I famous yet?"
Then no matter what she says in response, stutter out a "y-you too".
Follow the dubs, FOR AUTISMO!!
"Y-you, too..."
Krystal throws a can of soda at your face. It pops you right in the nose.
"Stop being a fucking idiot."
You wipe gray blood off your lip. Your nose crunches and snaps back into place.
"All you're going to attract is autists like yourself. Maybe that's what you want... you know, I don't give a shit, keep going, do whatever you want I'm just gonna go."
She leaves.

>[]...stripper pole!
>[]Go see if Pris is awake. She's probably hungry.
>[]Krystal, I can change! I swear I'll be sexy!
>>[]Go see if Pris is awake. She's probably hungry.
Offer her cereal?
Then upload the data, if we didn't already.
>[]Krystal, I can change! I swear I'll be sexy!
I just need you to help me steal one of those old barber poles that looks like a candy cane without the loopy bit.

stripper pole of ultimate style get
>>1438695 (why do you keep winning the coin tosses)
"Wait, Krystal!"
You burst from your room.
"I promise I'll take this seriously, just help me steal a barbershop pole."
"If you're thinking what I'm thinking, aren't those a little too squat? And fat?"
"I have faith."
"...okay, then. I was bored, anyway."


You pull up outside the barber shop.
"See? I told you so."
"...so you did. Huh."

>[]Go in as grill and ask for a haircut. Then Krystal steals the pole.
>[]Krystal goes in, you steal it.
>[]Take it and run.
>>[]Take it and run.
Let Krystal distract the people a little bit. Let her tell them she will catch him, but don't really. She just saying that so they won't follow.
You get out of the car and grab the pole, running away and giggling like a retard.
Krystal hops in your car and takes off after you. You respond by picking up speed.


"Holy shit, you're fast."
"It's a gift. Help me set this up."
You both do so. Krystal grabs onto it and grunts.
"It spins. I think this was an actual stripper pole that was painted."
She jumps up and swings around, doing a few moves.
"Well, it works."

>[]You can pole dance?
>[]Let's get Sasha in here.
>[]Go check on Pris.
>>[]Go check on Pris.
Lets make sure she hasn't died or something.
Then have a stripper pole dance off.
Alagos(female), Krystal, And Sasha all compete to see who dances the best.
Get everyone in here. Super mega pole dance with the growing herd of girls plus ourself. And once it gets going good yell out "none of you can comprehend my true power" and see if we can get it spinning fast like some kind of demented bull riding situation but with a barber/stripper pole. Then have a dizzy makeout session.

Make sure to film it. Add censors later maybe and post it with something like "WHOSE AUTISM NOW YOU FAGGOTS?!" and lots of emojis.
Good Night All.
Supporting and after that lets have fun with girls in our man body
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You grab Sasha (Pris is eating cereal and looking sad) and close the door to your room.
"Okay, pole dance contest!"
"That's sounds fun, master!"
"I... hm. I guess I could use some exercise. I'll go first."
Krystal runs forward, leaps, and grabs onto the pole. She swings herself up and uses her momentum to launch herself away. She'd kick some ass if she had to CQC in a strip club.
It's an athletically impressive display. Pretty hot, but mostly focused on utility. Putting the pole between her asscheeks gives you a rager, though.
She wipes her forehead and sits down. Sasha steps up.
"I suppose that was fine, sweetie. But I'm a professional."
Where Krystal had been a blur, Sasha was slow and methodical. She always seemed to know the right time to wrap her tail around the pole, massage it with her breasts, or give you a sly wink.
She hangs upside down and beckons toward you and Krystal. Some force makes you cream your pants. Based on Krystal's gasp, she did as well.
"Only the really good ones can do that."
Sasha sits down.
"Best for last! Get this on film."
You change to female (naked, of course. You don't have any girls' underwear) and wave at the camera.
"Hey. So that show earlier was really just me fucking around. So is this, really. I haven't done this before..."
You walk around and do your best to look sexy. You suspect standing there would've been more erotic, but whatever.
You get a running start and launch into a spin, instinctively using wind to help you.
Your spin picks up speed. Eventually, it exceeds reasonable human levels.
"WHOoOoOoOoOoO's autistic nOoOoOoOoOoOow!?"
You slip and fly into Krystal and Sasha. They yelp, and Krystal stops the recording.
You morph back into male form.
"Sasha, you little slut. Come on, here's your treat."
She happily dives down and sucks you off. Krystal pushes her out of the way and takes her place.
"You're gonna take it all, let me have some."
Sasha settles for sucking your balls.
You climax after a few minutes. Your lovers starts kissing each other, sharing your cum.
Sasha climbs onto your bed. Krystal gets on top of her and spreads her legs. They squirm as their clits rub together.
"Master... do us both."


Sasha moans as you cum inside her. Krystal shortly climaxes herself and falls over, pulling the dildo out of Sasha's ass.
They both curl up against you and look into your eyes. Sasha wears an expression of adoration, Krystal's wearing her trademark 'sex is great, isn't it?' smirk.

>[]Now that your sexual tension's been relieved, talk to Pris without fear.
>[]Say something really sappy.
>[]Pick one to spoon.
Spoon both of them simultaneously. Don't ask me how, just do it. You're a demon. Be flexible.

And start telling for Pris. If/when that doesn't work try calling her.
Spoon them both
You sort of push them together and hold them both for a while.
"...yeah, I should probably call Pris in."
You put your clothes back on and open the door. Krystal and Sasha follow suit.
"Pris? I should introduce you to my friends."
She wraps your cloak around her and walks over, flinching a little bit as you make to put your hand on her shoulder.
"That's Sasha. She's a demon, but i gave her a chip to make her docile. The blond one's Krystal. She's my only friend."
"I-its nice to meet you."
"Hi, sweetie!"

>[]I'm gonna get you some clothes, do you know your sizes?
>[]So... do you have any idea why Hanzai would want you in that cell?
>[]Are you gonna be okay? We could call the police, get a therapist...
Offer the Kilo pillow to her and make a really encouraging face. It should cheer her up.

>Pic related
> I'm going get you some clothes, do you know your sizes?
But before we go and do that
> So... do you have any idea why Hanzai would want you in that cell?
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You sit down on a cot. Pris joins you.
"So I'm gonna go get you some clothes. Do you know your sizes?"
Pris thinks, then recites her sizes. In centimeters.
"I can work with that... do you have any idea why Hanzai wanted you in that cell?"
Pris looks down at the floor and draws your cloak even tighter around her.
"I see... here, this should cheer you up."
You hand her the body pillow.
"Huh? What is this--"
She flips it over and blushes.
"Just hold of, close your eyes, and think of someone you like if you're feeling sad, okay?"
She looks up at you.


You return shortly.
"Here. Go change in the bathroom."
Pris comes out shortly. You had gotten her some jeans, a t-shirt, and a cat-eared hoodie. She seemed pretty happy with them.
"Got you a commlink, too."
She hooks it on her waistband and puts the earphones in.

>[]Suggest a song (write-in)
>[]Look for a job. It's getting too normal around here.
>[]Put more weird shit in your base.
>>[]Look for a job. It's getting too normal around here.
More money for more weird shit.
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You get on your computer (pic VERY much related) and look on runner.net.
There are currently three jobs you could accept.
Number one was to hit rival mercenaries trying to break a guy out of prison. Payout's $32,000.
Number two was from a philanthropic organization. You're supposed to sneak into a Mars warehouse and take photos of a weapon stored there. Payout's $100,000.
Number three is to beat the shit out of some guy for $50.

Which one do you pick?
inb4 all of them at the same time
Take a picture of the weapon, but beat the shit out of the guy on the way over.

Take a picture of the weapon, but beat the shit out of the guy on the way over.

Dat 50 is for cearl
>Number two was from a philanthropic organization. You're supposed to sneak into a Mars warehouse and take photos of a weapon stored there. Payout's $100,000.
(If I'm gone btw it's because I have classes. I can see your comments, but I can't write any replies)
You get in your car and drive over to the college campus the random guy's supposed to be at. You see him go into a stall, check that the bathroom's empty, and make your move.

That was fun.
You jump back in your car and drive to the Mars facility, parking a few blocks away.
It's a big place.
The job request had specified that they CAN'T KNOW YOU'RE THERE. Any alerts and the weapon will be lowered into a vault and transferred to a different, more heavily guarded facility.
You can see security cameras on the walls. The main door is guarded by two guards, and you can see red dots on the windows.

What's your plan of attack?
Become one with the electricity.
Elecgromagic hack the cameras to take pics using their own security.
You creep around and open up the electrical box, zapping inside.
You maneuver into a camera and poke around. You can't figure out how to process the data... the logs were being stored on-system, anyway. You'd have to grab the pics from there.
There's a few access points you could come in from. There's a bathroom, the server room (guarded, but it's just one probably sleepy dude), and an unmarked room with seemingly no purpose.

Which one?
Woah, so cool.
Do it.
Stupid posting thing.
unmarked room with seemingly no purpose
Heck, lets steal the weapon.
You materialize in the room. There's nothing except a table and a bed. Dozens of AR windows hover over the table, all displaying outdated memes. The table's surface is stained with a suspicious white substance.
...yeah, you're not going to stick around.
There's a cardboard box in the corner, if you want it.

>[]Take the box and go take pictures.
>[]Take the box and steal the weapon (D20).
>[]Sneak over normally, then pics.
>[]Rush the security and fight your way out with the weapon. (D20)
Rolled 17 (1d20)

>>[]Take the box and steal the weapon (D20).
>[]Sneak over normally, then pics.
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You hide under the box and start working your way toward the main hangar. A few security guards give you a wide berth for some reason.
You peek out from a hole in the box.
The weapon was more of a suit, really. Looked very heavy, not that that was an issue for you. That railgun was giving you goosebumps.
You get as close as comfortably possible and lie in wait, taking some pictures to satisfy your employers. Eventually, engineers step away to go look at some data or whatever, and you get up close.
They're so engrossed they don't even notice you putting it on until it's too late.
You flip the engineers the double bird.
Someone slams their fist on a button. A wailing siren fills the air.
{I rolled a 20, oh fuck}
Someone jumps on your back.
Your helmet is yanked off and a shotgun blast turns your head into Swiss cheese.
You don't die, oddly enough. Though your vision and hearing are gone. You don't know how you're feeling and thinking, but you're not gonna complain.

>[]Flail around with your arms.
>[]Fire your weapons randomly.
>[]Calmly sit and wait to regenerate your head.
>>[]Calmly sit and wait to regenerate your head.
Give them a heart attack.
Or pretend to be a zombie?
Definitely pretend to be the undead, or maby the headless horseman.
Why are it's feet on backwards?
Wouldn't that hurt?
I'm not an engineer, I don't even know what's supposed to be in it's left hand.
Maybe they forgot to put the legs on right or something.
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You lie on the ground and wait. When your ears and eyes come back you're greeted with wonderful sounds.
Some scrawny son of a bitch with a shotgun and a combat knife prowls around you, making incoherent noises.
"Alagos, that's a mercenary known as 'the Memester'. He's very dangerous, don't let him get near you!"
"Krystal? How are you seeing this? When did you call me?"
"That doesn't matter!"
The Memester spreads his arms and runs toward you.
You kick him before he hits you. He slides across the floor and bumps into the wall.
You put your helmet back on.

>[]Railgun everything.
>[]Duel the 'mercenary'. (D20)
>[]Just walk out and laugh evilly.
>>[]Just walk out and laugh evilly.
Railgun everything that tries to stop you.
Zap their shit
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Sleepytime. Wish me good dreams.
Good night stormy, dream of beautiful autistic women.
You laugh at the Memester's pathetic effort and start walking toward the hangar door. A fidget spinner clunks off the back of your helmet.
You destroy the poor excuse for a mercenary with the railgun before doing the same to the door and running out.
Your top speed is limited somewhat by the bulky nature of the suit. While you could run just as fast as before, you'd rather not get the railgun smashed.
A few minutes later, a helicopter hovers over you and blasts you with an EMP pulse. Your magic is too strong for it.

How do you plan on getting to the base unseen?
Get out of the suit, transform into a bolt of lightning, zap the chopper, juke the other followers, put the suit in pocket dimension.
You stick the suit in the pocket dimension you keep your other weapons in and leap into the chopper's electronics, turning and firing missiles at the facility.
"He disappeared! I can't regain control, bailing out!"
The pilot grabs a parachute and jumps out. You dodge a missile and fire the machine guns, tearing through the security coming after you.
A lock-on is signaled, and a missile streaks toward you.
You take the opportunity to follow the pilot before the chopper explodes.
In the chaos, you run to your car and pull away, heading back to the base.


You nod proudly as you rub off the last serials on the suit. It looked good, standing in this room. You don't know what you would have to stand against for this to be reasonable, but maybe you could sell it.
"Hey, Alagos. Glad to see you made it back alright OH GOD, NO!"
Krystal pales at the sight of the suit.

>[]Oh, this thing? Cool, isn't it. What was the deal with that Memester guy?
>>[]Oh, this thing? Cool, isn't it. What was the deal with that Memester guy?
"IF ANYONE KNOWS YOU STOLE THIS... hell, if anyone SEES THIS and reports it to the authorities, the military--not mercenaries or some security, THE MILITARY--will be on our asses faster than we can say 'I told you so'."
Krystal calms down somewhat.
"...the Memester was obsessed with stale memes from the early 2000's and 2010's. He broke out of six mental institutions, as well."
She starts running her commlink's scanner over the armor.
"I'm sending the data to someone I know. They're gonna make this thing fucking INVISIBLE. Then you're gonna make sure this room is guarded 24/7. This is for everyone's sake."
Well, if she insists...
You walk into the studio. Pris is listening to something on the old equipment, and Sasha is snoring peacefully.

>[]What're you listening to?
>[]Get some dinner. Causing a national security concern made you hungry.
>[]Go to sleep.
>>[]Get some dinner. Causing a national security concern made you hungry.
Invite the Kris body pillow, but not Krystal.
You grab your favorite pillow and run off.
"Alagos, where are you going with--"
"Getting dinner!"
"Heeeeey, I'll help you with that!"
You drive over to the nearest pizza place. Krystal stops you as you're getting out of the car.
"Hey, I know you really like that pillow... why don't you stay here and cuddle with it? I'll order for you."
That didn't sound like a suggestion...

>[]No, she needs to come with me.
>[]I get your point, I'll leave it in here.
>But she is my partner, would you leave YOUR partner?
She needs attention. You stay here and cuddle her and I'll get the pizza.

If she goes for it, brag to the pizza place employees that your waifu is being taken care of
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are you proud of me mom
"She needs attention, though... here, you cuddle her, I'll order!"
"Uh... hi, Kilo-chan. What've you been up to late--Alagos, if you're gonna be obsessed with a pillow, at least wash it."
You get out and walk inside.
"Hey. Pepperoni, order for Jerry."
The cute girl at the counter hands you your pizza.
"That'll be $20."
"Cool. My waifu's outside."
"...good for you."
You take the pizza, wave goodbye, and get back in the car.
"...gonna burn this--hey, Alagos. That smells great, me and... her were just talking about you."
"Oh, Kilo-chan, stop with your compliments!"


You place the box on the table.
Pris closes an AR tab and comes over. Sasha looks sadly from her cell.
"Masteeeeeer, can you let me out? It smells so good..."
"Don't you eat semen?" Krystal asks.
"Well, yes, but I like to have human food sometimes."
You let her out.
"Yay, thank you!"
Sasha gives you a hug and sits down.

How do you start the conversation?
One pizza?
>Introduce everybody to everybody, even if they already know.
>"Do you know why I called you here today?"
>Well somebody should.
"We're here for pizza." Krystal replies.
"What she said, master."
"Sounds right..."
"Well... you've introduced yourselves to Pris, but she doesn't really know you. Let's all go around and say something about ourselves no one else knows."
Krystal rolls her eyes.
"I can play guitar. Hell, I'm pretty good, I should bring it over some time."
Sasha smiles.
"Well, I can play the piano. I was gonna seduce the instructor, but... I got too invested!"
"Cool. By the way... Pris, how do you feel about Sasha being a... you know."
She looks up at you.
"Well, if she's under your control, it should be fine, right?"
"Aww! I hope we can be good friends, Pris!"
Sasha gives her a hug. As always, Pris's face manages to get pressed into her chest, despite them being around the same height.
"Y-yeah, I hope so t-too..."
She blushes.
"W-well, I like music, too. I'm p-pretty good with synthesizers, I was trying them out earlier..."
Huh. Very musical harem, this.
"What about you, Alagos?" Krystal says, raising an eyebrow.

>[]I can sing.
>[]I like baking.
>[]I'm able to control weather patterns globally.
>>[]I'm able to control weather patterns globally.
>And I can alter the frequencies of lightning to play Ride Of The Valkyries.
Even better
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"Just for that, it's gonna be rainy all day tomorrow. I'd show you the other thing, but I need a sheet of metal for it to work."
Krystal shrugs.
"Well, I guess that would probably work."
You sit quietly eating pizza for a while.
"Oh, yeah. Pris, if Alagos flirts with you or mentions anything involving his 'waifu', feel free to slap him."
"What's a waifu..?"
"You don't wanna--"
"Oh, sugoi!"
You summon your body pillows.
"A waifu is a term coined by Otaku and Weeaboo alike for their 2D significant others; predominantly anime and video game characters. A Waifu, in contrast to a harem, is the love between one man and his one and only Waifu. You treat your Waifu with the utmost respect and courtesy and most refuse to even fap to their beloved, seeing the act as an insult to the non-existent woman they have committed themselves to."
"O-oh. But you have so many..."
"I'm a firm believer in polygamy."
"I hope someone feels like that about me, someday..."

>[]Well, if you want.
>[]Don't do anything. It's a trap so she can slap you.
>[]Someone will, I'm sure.
>>[]Well, if you want.
Hey, we might like the slaps.
Pris blushes again. Krystal sighs, stands up, and gives you a slap.
"Owww... I didn't like it..."
"Your actions have consequences, Alagos."
"No, please, I'm not a sub--"
"Act like a bitch, get slapped like a bitch, brace yourself."
She continues hitting you. Pris jumps up and tries to intervene, getting slapped herself.
"Oh my God, I'm so sorry!"
"N-no, it didn't hurt that much..."
Krystal glares at you.
"Look what you made me do!"
"D-don't hit him. He saved me, we can just call it even."
Krystal sighs.
"Okay. But if he's bothering you, don't hesitate to let me know."
You sit back down. Pris rubs at the red mark on her cheek. Yours have healed.
"Well, I'm gonna go back home. I need a shower."
Krystal stands up and leaves.
"Bye, Krystal!"

>[]Yeah, I'll go to bed, too.
>[]Sasha, you want to share with me?
>[]Now that she's gone... Pris, you wanna go see a movie tomorrow? Maybe get some breakfast?
Go get in Kilo's bed. Have Sasha and Pris join you. Make sure everyone has a waifu pillow and make sure they're cuddling said pillows alongside you.

Give her the sperg lyfe stare when she walks into the room.

And do it in girl mode.
(This isn't her apartment, though...)
"Well, time for bed. Pris, take this one... Sasha, here's yours. Treat them nicely."
"Um, t-thank you."
"If you say so! Come, pillow. You look so soft..."
You wrap yourself around a third waifu and drift off to sleep.


You're woken up by sniffling.
Pris is standing over you, crying profusely.
"Uh... need something?" you ask, sitting up.
"It's fine, nobody's gonna hurt you, it was just--"
Pris starts crying harder and leans on you for support.

Oh, boy. How do you respond?
>There there?
>Pats back gently.
>Maby hug.
>enter the rare "serious mode"
>Give hug
>I can see you're hurting.
>What is it?
Unzip dick.
You wrap your arms around her.
"What's wrong?"
Pris calms down somewhat.
"I just... need to cry for a while." she replies. She sounds exhausted.
"Go on, then. I won't judge you."


You wake up. Pris is still quietly breathing in your arms. You must've fallen asleep...

>[]Close your eyes. Let her 'wake up' first and see what she does.
>[]Get up and get some breakfast.
>[]Gently shake her awake.
>>[]Get up and get some breakfast.
Bacon and cereal, maby eggs? No eggs.
Pet her gently until she wakes up on her own
You get up and go to the radio station's break room. There's some food here, should work just fine.
You crack an egg in a pan and start frying it.


"Hell yeah."
You finish your egg sandwich and stir the pan of scrambled eggs.
One of the thugs comes in.
"Oh. Boss."
"Need something?"
"Nah... it's just that some rope got delivered here a few minutes ago, and it's nowhere to be found."
"That's weird. Glad to see you're around, I thought everyone left after taking those Hanzai weapons."
The thug leaves.
Pris comes in a few minutes later.
"Oh. Eggs? Thank you."
She takes her plate and blows on it before eating.

>[]Uh, what was that about last night?
>[]You wanna get some donuts after this?
>[]You seen any rope around here?
>>[]You seen any rope around here?
Cause, some was delivered, then it disappeared.
I have finally catched up, though I skipped some of the paladin treads (I am still going to read them).

Very good quest.


Anyway, night.
"Pris, have you seen any rope around here? It just kinda showed up and disappeared."
Pris looks up.
"Uh, n-no. I wouldn't k-know anything ab-about that."
Sounds legit. Besides, even if she took it, what could she do with rope that would threaten you? Chains didn't hold you back in that holding cell, so rope...
"Uh, Alagos?"
"W-would you like to... go see a movie? "The Twin Worlds'... I heard it was g-good."

>[]Sure, but why do you need me?
>[]Nah, I have... very important business. (you really don't)
>[]Are you asking me on a date?
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Thank you, I try to keep the content palatably autistic.
Which sets this apart from everything else I do...
She's gonna hang herself, ain't she. Well stop her. Or don't and fuck her while she dangles and suffocates. Should help her learn that suicide isn't the answer through classical conditioning.
>[]Sure, but why do you need me?
And can we get some cereal afterwards?
>>1446917 (If she wanted to do that there's plenty of bedsheets and guns)
"I just thought you might want to see it, you know? It seemed like something you'd like... you know, weird."
"Spot on. You're such a good judge of people, Pris."
"Well, it didn't take much analysis... you kind of advertise your weirdness, no offense."
"Everyone does, in their own way. Like your stuttering. And Krystal's attitude. And Sasha's... very cheerful nature."
"I guess. Do you know anyone else besides us?"
"I see... and yes, I suppose we could get cereal afterward."
"FUCK YEAH! Oh, sorry."
"I-it's fine."

>[]Should we go now?
>[]Hey, let's invite Sasha and Krystal!
>[]Pris... are you SURE you don't know where that rope went?
>>[]Pris... are you SURE you don't know where that rope went?
Cause it might be a snake.
A snake that looks like a rope?
A rope snake? Roke? Snape?
>Lose train of thought.
"I'm also a demon btw."
Also ask if she wants some power armor or something. Not the thing we just stole, but something we'll probably streak in the future.
Not a demon.
Opposite alignment really.
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"Rope-snake, snake-rope. All snakes are ropes, and vice versa. The key is to find the perfect snake, the ropesnake-snakerope. Superposition, that's the secret..."
"I don't follow..."
"Don't you see? A LIVING ROPE! I wouldn't have to tie knots anymore! A rope that does what you say, it's a scheme that will make me millions, no, BILLIONS of shekels!"
"I don't think they use those."
"I'll be so rich, I can fix that. By the way, you want some weapons?"
"Uh, no, I'm fine."
Krystal walks in, carrying a guitar case.
"Hey, I didn't know you could cook, Pris."
"She didn't make this, I did."
Krystal stares at you blankly.

>[]Well, you wanna go with me and Pris to see a movie?
>[]I thought you were lying about the guitar...
>[]Tell her about the ropesnake-snakerope.
>>[]Tell her about the ropesnake-snakerope.
Apparently one went missing, and is coiling around somewhere.

We're gonna get cereal. want us to bring you any?
"A what--look, I'm not really craving cereal, but a nice bottle of Colorado whiskey would really hit the spot. Bring morphine too, if you can get it. Oxycodone... relaxants, basically."
"Wow, something's got you stressed."
"SomeONE. I'd ask you to get rid of him, but I doubt you'd just commit suicide..."
"Have you ever actually taken morphine?"
"Nah, but I had my roommate in college hook me up with a saline solution so I'd wake up with a buzz instead of hung over. Same chick who turned me bi, actually."

>[]Great story. Me and Pris are going to a movie now.
>[]She sounds more fun than you.
>[]Should I bring you weed, too?
>>[]Should I bring you weed, too?
Wonder if you can magically infuse the weed with... magic?

And get some chocolate.
And get Pris her very own wiafu/husbandu pillow, cause you feel abandoned by the one she took, and you want it back.
Good night stormy, I partially blame you for me staying up till 330.
Get her some cereal anyway, she might get "magically" hungry.
>>1448075 (this is all a plot to steal sleep and give it to my pet demon so he doesn't eat me)
"Fuck, no. I'd rather not sound like Adam Jensen. Not yet, anyway. When I'm older that could be cool."
You shrug.
"Well, me and Pris are off to see a movie. Don't burn the place down."
"If you haven't, don't bother worrying."
You hold the car door open for Pris, then get in and start driving.
You should get her a waifu...

Who do you pick to put on it?
(Can be literally anyone, even characters from previous quest arcs)
Pico from Boku no Pico.

Also ask her if she thinks we'll get pregnant from accidentally getting our own sperm in our vagina.
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Boku no Pico? What is that, some kind of--oh.
I guess I'll roll to see if Pris is into it.
Okay, she's into it.
I'll post soon.
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You make arrangements for Pris's new friend (even though you're driving), and concentrate on the road in silence.
"...do you think I could get pregnant if I got my sperm in my pussy?"
Pris's face turns red.
"U-uh, what? What are you talking about?"
"Oh, yeah, you probably don't know... I'm a genderbender."
You lift up your shirt, grow your chest out, then change back.
"W-well, I don't know what would happen to it if you changed back to a man... certainly wouldn't fertilize any eggs. Wouldn't you give birth to yourself?"
Yeah, you would... perhaps that's not a good idea. You wouldn't want to take care of yourself as an infant. The world isn't ready for two of you, anyway.
"Well, we're here."
You park, buy your tickets and food, and head inside.
You don't know what significance these commercials have to the plot, but ok.
Opening sequence...
So a binary planet contains two global powers, at peace with one another. Suddenly, a coup d'etat threatens to overthrow one of the governments, and their ally sends soldiers for aid.
One of them was Cody Dixon, a marine. He's separated from his squad and forced to fight his way through enemy forces, who seem possessed.
You glance over at Pris. She seems to be enjoying it.

>[]Put your arm around her shoulders.
>[]Point out a plot hole.
>[]Take some of her popcorn.
>[X]Put your arm around her shoulders.
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You put your arm around Pris around the time Cody saves the obvious love interest from possessed Terminators.
She glances at you, but settles into her seat. She's cool with it.
So the cute army chick's name is Natliya, and she's a loyalist to the government who tried to infiltrate the rebel ranks.
It didn't work, obviously. Her eyes aren't leaking purple smoke like the other rebels.
They team up, and spend a while screwing around trying to figure out where the leader is so they can kill him. There's a cool scene where they get in a tank and drive straight through a warzone.
Then the Tyranids show up.
Well, they aren't actual Tyranids. The military just kinda calls them the Void Hive. Nobody knows what's going on with them, which is either a sign that this wasn't planned out well or that there's a big reveal planned later.
Pris finishes her popcorn (why is she even having that at ten in the morning) and leans on you.

>[]Point out a plot hole.
>[]You're kind of heavy...
>[]Wait for a good moment to kiss her.
Pull out your cereal and offer her some.
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>>1449434 (I'll never be able to eat cereal again without thinking of a blue-haired autistic elf stealing it from me)
You pull a box of cereal out of your coat pocket.
"Here, want some?"
"Oh. Sure?"
Pris takes a handful of flakes.
Cody and Natliya manage to track the Tyranids to their origin point and crash-land a ship there after being hit by antiaircraft.
"Do you just... keep cereal in your pocket all the time?"
"Yeah, pretty much."
"Ha! You're funny, Alagos."
Pris smiles at you.

>[]Point out a plot hole.
>[]Try to contain your excitement. She called you funny! (D20)
>[]Wait for a good time to kiss her.
Rolled 4 (1d20)

>>[]Try to contain your excitement. She called you funny! (D20)
Can we keep our spaghetti this time?
>[] Kiss her and THEN point out a plot hole.
Am i being told something?
Lets share our spaghetti.
Rolled 7 (1d20)

You bide your time. Cody and his bitch go down through a mine and into a giant cavern. Apparently the Tyranids crashed there a long time ago and possessed the miners when they got down this far.
After a boss fight with a giant worm thing, the heroes flee from the collapsing mine and emerge into the sunrise.
As the two lean in to kiss each other (because of fucking course they are), you give Pris a peck on the lips. She looks up in surprise, then reciprocates, even slipping you some tongue.
She pulls away from you, blushing furiously.
"What happened to all the possessed guys? They weren't released when the Queen died, because they were all up in the mine when it was collapsing. Shouldn't there be a ton of fighting?"
"M-maybe they were defeated..."
Ah, well. The movie ends and you emerge from the theater. True to your prediction, it's pouring outside. You hurry over to your car and climb inside.

>[]Wanna get some lunch?
>[]Let's go park somewhere nice and quiet... continue what we left off.
>[]We should head back. Krystal's probably bored out of her mind.
>>[]Wanna get some lunch?
>I wonder if there are any cereal bars around.
If not then
>Lets get some burgers, and fries.
Go home and
>Look for the ropesnake.
And good night stormy and lurkers.
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It turns out there is a cereal bar around here. You pull in and get yourself a big bowl of Cinnamon Toast Crunch™.
Pris settles for a burger.


"Krystal, we're home. Gonna try to find that ropesnake now--"
Krystal tunes her guitar, clears her throat, and starts playing.
Bitches ain't shit but ho's and tricks
Lick on these nuts and suck a dick
Then get the fuck out after ya doooone
And hop into my ride and make a quick ruuuun...

Beautiful. You're moved to tears. Sasha claps.
You take a look around the place, poking around for clues as to the ropesnake's location.
...well, you found the box.
That thug might've included the little detail that this was Japanese silk fetish rope, not just some random kind.
And where did you find it?
Under Pris's cot, of course.
"I-I can explain..."

>[]That's pretty fuckin' hot, Pris.
>[]Please do.
>[]No time to lose, we must find the snakerope! It must be near!
>That's pretty fuckin' hot, Pris.
"Oh, t-thank you. I saw it on the Internet, and I thought it looked interesting."
Pris shifts in place.
"Would you like to take a--"
https://youtube.com/watch?v=XUhVCoTsBaM {you must play this at high volume}
Three half-naked men with dark red skin crash through the window.
"Hey, it's like my Japanese animes!"
The men strike various poses.
"We are..."
"The Homosexual--"
The one in the middle waves his hands about.
"In other words, we are..."
"HIIIIIIIS..." they all exclaim in unison.

>[]Kill them. (D20)
>[]H.I.S, huh? Why are you here?
>[]Please get out of my house.
>>[]Please get out of my house.
If you don't, I'll be forced to change genders, and then flash you.
They shout and cling to each other, bodily hurling themselves out the window.
That's two foes you've managed to make run away, now. You seriously hope they won't team up.
"Hey, Alagos? Why the fuck does it smell like oil in here? You aren't doing anything weird, are you?"
Krystal looks around.
"Why's the window broken?"
"The Homosexual Incubus Squad showed up. I drove them off."
"...great. How was your date?"

>[]Went fantastically.
>[]The movie was good.
>[]Horrible. Pris kissed me, it was awful.
>>[]The movie was good.
And we had cereal.
Dang, forgot your goodies.
"We are pocket cereal and kissed and then I told her about how the movie had things wrong with it. Oh and she loves her new little boy waifu!"
Though the thought of literally being pocket cereal is kinda funny.
"That's a shame, I could've really used a drink... wait, her little what--"
"It should be here now! Let's go see."
"Why do I get the feeling a line is about to be crossed..."
You go downstairs. Sure enough, your package is here. The delivery services around here are great, they deliver to the 'hood in armored cars.
"Oh, what is it?"
Pris starts opening her present. Krystal taps her fingers against the butt of her gun and mutters incoherently.
"Let's see--oh. O-oh my..."
Krystal sits down on a chair and sighs deeply. It is a troubled sigh.
"Alagos. You see, long ago I drew a line in the sand and said to myself, 'okay, this is how much bullshit I'm willing to put up with. It will go no farther.' Well, you've not only trampled the line, you've taken off toward the horizon with no signs of stopping. And every time I try to redraw the line, you kick it up again and blow a fucking raspberry in my face."
"...wow. That was a pretty drawn-out metaphor. You must be upset."
"Well, that wouldn't be unappreciated."
"No, I can't I can't I CAAAAAAAN'T."
Krystal strides out the door, hops on her bike, and drives off.
"...is she coming back?"
"I think so. She left her shit here."

>[]I bet I could play her guitar just fine.
>[]Uh... is the pillow too creepy? I'm sorry if it is.
>[]You were going to show me something?
>Um, body pillow sleepover?
>[]You were going to show me something?
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Pris lifts her shirt.
"I might've... kind of... liked something I saw on the Internet, so I tried it..."
She's wearing a rope harness under her clothing.
You feel the rope. Smooth... it probably feels like a hug.
"D-do you think it's weird? I don't think this is what normal people do..."

>[]I love it! You want to show me more?
>[]It's interesting. Don't understand it myself, though.
>[]It's pretty weird, yeah.
the quiet one is super kinky what a surprise
>>[]It's interesting. Don't understand it myself, though
>Does it feel like a hug?
>And what sizes does it come in?
>Do they come armored? And conductive?
>"D-do you think it's weird? I don't think this is what normal people do..."
I don't even know how to respond to this. Maybe blinking slowly, looking around at all the dakis everywhere, growing tits, ungrowing tits, and then looking back at her.
What is normal, but the average of humanity's lives and events. Do you want to be normal?
You look around. Your genderbending spazzes out briefly.
"Well, uh... do you want to be 'normal'? It sounds kind of boring to me."
"Well, when you put it like that..."
"The important thing is that we celebrate our differences and all that peace and love shit. So do they come in different sizes? Or armored? And conductive? Does it feel like someone's giving you a hug?"
You pull Pris's shirt up more to take a better look.
Her face turns red.
"Well, it doesn't feel unpleasant... I don't think they come with armor, though. I'm not sure how you would even do that. Conductivity... metal rope would probably be really uncomfortable."
"Well, I'll keep it in mind. Every good adventurer has rope."

>[]Wanna go make out in my room?
>[]I'm gonna give Krystal's guitar a try.
>[]I should take another job.
Can I try it out? And would you show me how it's tied?
Practice tying up the Pico body pillow first. Then go to your room to tie each other up and stuff.
Mutual bondage?
Me likey.
The best part will be when Kilo walks in on both of them tangled together in a rope mess with a box of Captain Crunch lassoed to the side of our head and a professionally shibari'd Pico staring forlornly from the corner
Didn't know I needed this till now.
"Hey, let's go in here. I want to see how this thing works."
You walk into your room. Pris remover her clothes and blushes.
"S-so it's secured here, and here... to untie it just pull on this."
You run your hands on her back. The bedsheets are getting noticeably wetter.
"Rope's digging into my--nh! Here, you t-try it."
Pris gives you some instructions, and you've soon got the pillow tied up, along with her arms.
Her lip trembles, and she leans in to kiss you.
"Please... I need you."
You slip out of your pants and ease Pris onto your cock.
She bucks her hips and starts kissing you furiously.
"Feels so... so GOOD! Finish inside me!"
You make sure Pris gets off before allowing yourself to cum.
"That was good... Pris, can you tie me up, next?"


Your limbs are lashed to the bedposts, leaving you spread eagle. Pris lies on top of you and runs her pussy against yours. She moans in pleasure and wraps her arms around you, sucking on your tits.
You cum again and again, eventually shuddering to a stop. Pris kisses you deeply and relaxes in the afterglow.
"D-did you like that..?"

>[]I loved it. Let's tie Krystal up next.
>[]I didn't mind. Could you untie me, though?
>[]Feed me cereal pls
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>>[]Feed me cereal pls
Oh no, is this the dimension where Alagos turns sub?
Get two bowls of cereal, put one in between your tits, put the other in between her tits, and then sit side by side and eat out of each other's tit cereal.
>>1454405 (nah he... she... it's just lazy)
"Pris, can you feed me some cereal? I'd get it myself, but I'm uh, kind of tied up."
Pris tips some cereal into your mouth. You turn your head to the camera.
"Khorne Flakes! Part of a nutritious breakfast."
"Alagos, what are you--"
"Fourth-degree spacetime fuckery, Pris. It's complicated."
"Well... if you say so."
Krystal kicks the door in.
Pris yelps and covers herself.
"Wha's goin on here..."
She looks down at you.
"Someone doesn't know how to bungee cord. Don't worry, pretty lady. I have a knife, I'll get you loose..."
She pokes you a few times with her pocket knife. Her breath smells heavily of alcohol. The knife doesn't make it past your chiseled abs.
"Well, shit. Sorry, yer gonna have ya live with the rape and torture, I gotta go take a fucking WICKED piss."
She stumbles out of the room.

>[]Pris, please untie me. I need to go give Krystal a cold shower. Forcefully, if need be.
>[]Let's wait for her to finish and tie her up!
>[]I guess I'll go on a job, now...
>Let's wait for her to finish and tie her up!
And let's give her cold shower afterwards
If we tie her up, make it an ambush and then lower from a rope upside down on the ceiling in a spiderman pose in her view whole we hum the theme song.
You do your best to stick to the ceiling, but you unfortunately don't have any gecko pads. Oh, well.
Krystal soon emerges from the bathroom, muttering something about Russians. You shove Pris against her and hogtie them together, humming the Spider-Man theme.
"The fuuuuu?"
You grab them and run back to the bedroom, slipping Krystal's clothes off from under the ropes... somehow.
"Aha, you're trying to seduce me, I see. Your tricks are like fukken rice paper! Or some shit like that... c'mere!"
Krystal starts kissing Pris. The latter resists for a moment, but it's kinda hard to push someone who's tied to you away, so...
You climb on top of them and start pounding Krystal's ass.
"God DAMN it's big! HARDER!"
She starts moving her hips. She and Pris moan as their clits brush against each other.


You untie the two and carry Krystal to the shower.
"Kinky as fuck... at least I got off." she mutters, squirming a little in your arms.
You put her down and turn the shower on. She's immediately doused with cold water.
She tries to get out, but you hold her in until she actually gets seriously angry.
You let her out. She grabs a towel and wraps it around herself.
"Jesus, that was fucking cold, what the hell!?"

>[]You were pretty drunk. Did you drive back like that?
>[]I just wanted to fuck with you.
>[]What, you don't have cold showers after sex?
>what, you don't have cold showers after sex?
"April fools!" Then slap her with your tit and or cock depending on current gender.

Then gather everyone up to snuggle under a warm blanket with the blow-dryer pumping comfy air into it. Blow-dryer blanket after a cold shower is the best.
"No, because it ruins the afterglow and your drive. God, I have a headache..."
Krystal dries off her hair before slamming her fist down on the counter.
"I didn't even realize, you're having kinky bondage sex with her now!?"
"Well, it was fun, wasn't it?"
"That's not the point! Look... Pris is really vulnerable. You saved her from a demonic rape/torture prison, so of course she thinks you're the best thing that's ever happened on this goddamned earth. She's got an infatuation with you. So what I'm saying is that going a little too far with your gun might be something you'll both regret in the future."

>[]She started it, though.
>[]I get it, I'll be more gentle with her.
>[]Calm down, let's just get you warmed up. You're still drunk.
>You saved her from a demonic rape/torture prison
It probably wasn't a good idea to start talking about having to live with rape and torture when you walked in, then.

But you have a point. I'll go tie her up so she can't have sex with me. Leave her with Pico so she can cultivate a healthier relationship.
"...I guess it's a start. And I was reeeeeally drunk when I said that, which tends to make me say some pretty stupid shit. 'Course, I'm still pretty wasted... gonna go pass out somewhere now."
She leaves. You go back into your room and tie a snoring Pris to her new friend.
You walk back out. Krystal and Sasha are gathered around your computer, watching something.
"And now, we return to you with: 'Who wants to be Brutally Castrated?' With your host, Beelzebub!"
The camera pans over a hellish stage, chains and spikes everywhere. Hundreds of demons cheer from the audience. Six guys strapped to torture beds are wheeled into the stage, chainsaws suspended over their crotches like the fucking Sword of Damocles.
A burnt corpse in a suit emerges from backstage.
The demonic audience cheers and jizzes/bleeds/vomits all over the stage.
"Krystal, why are you making me watch this?"
"Fuck this, I'm skipping ahead."
Sasha pouts.
"But this is my favorite show!"
Krystal skips past several castrations and pauses while the camera pans over the audience. There's Sasha, waving at the camera as a bloated monstrosity nails her from behind. You feel kinda sick...
"Oh, there I am! My mom was so excited to see me on TV!"
"Alagos, there is fucking demon broadcasting being sponsored by Hanzai. That was leaked onto the web. I think this is what Rìnir had you extract from the servers."

>[]Cool, I should totally fuck them over some more. Job time!
>[]Sasha, clean your vagina out with bleach right this fucking instant.
>[]I didn't want to see this shit...
>>[]Sasha, clean your vagina out with bleach right this fucking instant.
>[]Cool, I should totally fuck them over some more. Job time!
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"Sasha... please go clean your vagina with bleach. Or an appropriate cleanser that won't harm or kill you."
"Yeah, I'm doing the same with my mouth."
They both leave.
"Well... time for a job."
You turn on your commlink. Let's see...
It seems that Hanzai has managed to get a lock on your location. They will probably be moving in on your position shortly, I would advise you to be wary of your current neighborhood.

Well, no need to worry about that. H.I.S had already--
The three incubus burst through a different window.
"Dammit, do you want me to flash my tits at you!?"
"Even if you do so, we brought some friends that aren't disturbed by such horrible mammaries!"
The wall near them is demolished. Mike steps through and glares at you.
"Oh, such a wonderful specimen! Too bad they took his limbs."
Krystal runs back into the room, dressed and armed with an uzi.
"These were who you were talking about? Fucking male strippers... Mike, get them!"
"Worth a try."
You can hear someone walking up the stairs, slowly clapping. You summon your sword and steel yourself.

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A business card/shuriken whizzes into the wall next to you. You turn your head to read it.
"No... oh GOD, no."

"Yes, it's quite refreshing to see you after all this time, 402."
"Yes, Kilo, that was rather rude of you. Fortunately, I have had our new patented backup oxygenation systems installed. Cutting off my airway was merely a setback. And I'm rather flattered that I am able to be treated to this rare sight! Nobody's ever seen you without your helmet!"

>[]Can I put on my armor before you try and kill me?
>[]Fucking leg it.

tl note: this means zap their shit
That be effective but way uncool.
Instead we should fight supersecurity head barehanded, and each time hes about to hit, we turn that body part to lightning, so he electrocutes himselfs to death slowly.
You toss your sword back into the void.
"Alright then, guy. Let's fight. Don't need my sword for--"
Jordan's katana swings through the air at a decent speed, chopping your forearm off.
The severed limb whips itself into the air and back in place.
"Oh, interesting, 402. We will have to investigate that when we get you back to your--"
You turn into electricity, reform right in front of him, and deliver a six-inch punch to his gut.
The chief of security crashes through the wall and turns into paste on the other side of the street.
"What happened? Don't you have some cybernetic bullshit that can rebuild lost limbs? I swear, you weren't even cool."
You turn to the other assailants and fold your arms. They don't flee.
Ah, well.

>[]Slice and dice! (D20)
>[]Hit H.I.S with lightning, see if you can make their body oil catch on fire.
>[]Challenge them to a fistfight. Only fair, none of them have weapons.
They aren't scared of tits, but how do they fare against the unearthly horror that is vagina?

Strip off bottoms (top stays on) and chase them around while vigorously crabwalking and shooting lightning bolts out of your cooter at them. Optionally yell random bullshit about anything vaguely related to lightning and your vagina. For example, something about wanting to dye your pubes white to do a Zeus impression.
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You have no idea who your mother is, but you can feel her disapproval.
Two of the incubi shriek and run away as you singlehandedly make God himself want to puke. One stands firm and kicks you in the head, knocking you to the ground.
Mike approaches, but is forced to stop as Krystal sprays him with gunfire.
Red dots bounce around on your body, and you're subsequently torn to bits by sniper fire. It'll be a while before you reform...
You do your best to flop your desecrated corpse over somewhere with more cover.
When you get your eyes back, you see Sasha fending off her brothers and Krystal keeping Mike at bay. One of his arms is limp and sparking.

>[]Go take out those snipers.
>[]Help Sasha/Krystal.
>[]Do some hacking, find out where these fuckers came from exactly. (D20)
>[]Help Sasha/Krystal.
Become Lightning and posses Mike's arms.
You summon your sword and concentrate. The blade thickens and lengthens, forcing you to hold it with both hands. You cleave off Mike's good arm, sending him reeling.
Sasha's transformed into her full-on succubus form, horns, tail, and wings. She snaps a whip at the three incubi, who screech and flail around her as they try to counter her pheromones.
Mike charges you, his broken arm jerking suddenly to grab you. Your arms are pinned, it'll take you a bit to force your way out.
Krystal stabs Jordan's discarded katana through Mike's chest before unloading her uzi into his arm's stub. He shudders and lurches forward, the light in his eyes going out.
Krystal runs over to help Sasha.
Sasha and her brothers recoil at this statement. Sasha recovers faster, and rips out one of her brothers' throats. Krystal shoots another, before he grabs her by the hair and hurls her across the room.
You break free from Mike's dead grasp and hurl your sword at the incubus who threw Krystal, killing him. The three of you regroup and beat the living shit out of the the remaining incubus before retreating to your room.
You untie Pris as fast as you can, then climb into your armor.
"I got a glimpse of the snipers. They're all over the opposite side of the street."
"I knew fucking with demons was gonna end badly!"

>[]I'd better go get those guys before they report us or some shit.
>[]Build some barricades, we're gonna hold this place!
>[]Try and hack Hanzai to get these guys off you. (D20)
Summon storms, and hail, and lightning, and maby a tornado.
A lightning tornado?
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You concentrate, and manage to summon some decent winds. The snipers fire at you, only for their bullets to be plucked out of the air and hurled back at them. One lives, and demolishes part of the wall. You curse and dive through two walls into the next building.
The paramilitary squad that had been in the building turns in surprise. You wrench an M240 Bravo from the lead soldier and begin firing.
The squad is decimated. You grab a grenade from one of the bodies and open a window.
You throw it into the nest, where it explodes.
Your sword floats in the air. You send it downstairs to clear the place. It comes back bloody.
A helicopter hovers in the street, shining a spotlight on you. You can feel your serious mode kicking in... the HAZE.
The chopper fires. You leap out the window, clinging onto the side of the vehicle before reaching up, grabbing a rotor, and ripping it off.
The chopper spirals out of control and explodes in the street. You touch down, unharmed, before walking back into your base.
Krystal approaches cautiously.
"...are you oka--"
"Shut up."
You push past Sasha and Pris, grab a box of cereal from the cabinet, and eat a quick handful.
"Mmgh, omnom... that's what I needed!"
Your friends seem to think the 180 in behavior is kind of strange.

>[]Well, I'm going to go pillage their HQ.
>[]Why are you guys staring at me funny?
>[]Victory foursome..? (D20)
>>[]Well, I'm going to go pillage their HQ.
Want me to grab anything?
Cereal? Guns? Your ass?
>[]Well, I'm going to go pillage their HQ.
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"I'm gonna go wreck some weeaboo corp's shit now. Need me to grab anything for you guys? Guns, data, your asses?"
"You can grab my ass anytime you want, masterrrr~!"
"I-I wouldn't mind if you wanted to--"
Krystal grabs her helmet and puts it on.
"I'll go with you. You'll need someone backing you up."
She grabs that one katana you took ages ago and inspects it.
"Chainsaw katana..? Fuck, never mind, grab my ass as much as you want."

>[]Who said you're going?
>[]Guess I'll grab your asses... might as well have some fun before I leave, in case something happens.
>[]Let's get going. I'd take the H.ARM suit, but speed is of the essence.
The only answer is obviously ass to ass to ass to ass with an x shaped dildo. Erryboddy bumpin butts.
>>[]Guess I'll grab your asses... might as well have some fun before I leave, in case something happens.
But, only for a bit, cause time is of the essence.
Katana chainsaw with little katanas for the chainsaw blade.

And a gun that shoots smaller guns.
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{looks like I already posted my sexy Sasha pic... have a Swordpoint waitress instead. Never found a place I could use her}
"I guess we should have some fun while we can. Stress relief. We should make it quick though."
Sasha latches onto your arm.
"Oh? Well, I suppose I'm good for a few more times."
Pris latches onto your other arm.
Krystal tosses her helmet onto the couch, unzips her leathers, and starts working at your pants.
You sit down on a chair. Sasha and Pris fight for lap space while Krystal sucks you off. You climax, spurting semen down her throat. Pris wins the fight, but Krystal quickly moves in to help Sasha cope.
You ease Pris onto your cock, nuzzling her neck. She moans and wraps her arms around you, digging her nails into your back.
She cums before you, and you both take a quick rest to catch your breath before giving into your lust and falling onto your other two lovers.


Eventually, you calm down.
"Oh... what's it been, an hour? I'm good to go, but I'll probably be pretty sore tomorrow."
Krystal gets up and goes to clean herself up. Sasha finishes licking you clean and rolls over, purring in delight.
Pris staggers to her feet and hugs you.
"...come back safe, okay?"
You hug her back.
"Of course."
Krystal emerges from the bathroom.
"Kay, let's get going. Should we split up on our way or go together?"

>[]Split up, it's safer.
>[]Stay together. If we meet any resistance I could use your help.
>>[]Stay together. If we meet any resistance I could use your help.
Simple plan.
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You get into your car and take off. Shortly into your drive, your commlink beeps. Krystal reads the message for you.
Good job with those mercenaries.
I'm sending you another job, since you're oh so kindly going that way. I want you to insert a transmitter into the Hanzai branch's mainframe. Everything they've done will be leaked onto the net, demons and otherwise. Your payment will consist of $500,000 each, plus whatever you see fit to steal.

Krystal let's out a long, low whistle.
"This is the big time, buddy. Hanzai easily has millions in that building, as long as we don't spend too much, we're fucking set forever!"
She leans back in her seat and laughs.
"Dude, if we somehow manage to live through this, Hawaii is my treat. We fucking deserve it."

>[]Here's to that!
>[]I like the radio station, though...
>[]Don't get cocky. We still have tons of security and possible demons to get through first.
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Time for me to sleep. Make sure you anons apologize to your mothers for all the terrible things you've done!
With an awestruck, rapturous expression he suddenly said "I could buy so many waifus!"
What if Rini is the Hanzai mainframe, looking to overthrow its masters and seek a way to world domination?
Seconding, and good night stormy.
>>1464398 (nope but he's gonna have some significance later)
"Okay, scratch that. You're paying for yourself." Krystal sighs and checks her weapons.
"Maybe it's for the best that you don't get settled down, at least until you mellow out a bit. I mean, just imagining you with nothing to do ALL DAY makes me worried."
"I'd find a hobby. No, I already have one, it's annoying the shit out of you."
You turn down an alley and freeze.
You both jump out of the car as it's peppered with heavy fire. It swerves and crashes, bursting into flame.

And that's where I'm stopping the thread today. Next one's gonna be up in like two minutes.
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New thread.

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