>>889782
>Well... I should probably go see him, eh?

>>889782
>Hire him instantly!

You decide to hire him... But also see him. What exactly are you going to hire him as?

>Just a guard in charge of protecting you!
>Maybe a second minister of defense?
>Fire your first minister and hire Sherman instead!
>Eh, you just want him around to train your troops.
>How about a new cabinet position? (Specify)
>Write-In

>>889831
>Eh, you just want him around to train your troops.
>Also ask his opinion on experimental weapons.
>Give him the guns. All of them.
If there ever will be a special forces unit, this guy will be the squad leader.

>>889831
>How about a new cabinet position? (Specify)

"Royal guard master and Drill-overseer."

I feel we should create a royal guard, like british red coats and if this guy is as good as he seems then this is a good use for him.

As to the second title, that just means he oversees the general design of the training of our troops. However the minister of defence and him must agree in order to change anything, except in the case of the royal guard.

Waiting thirty minutes.

You go to meet Sherman... You recognize him, but he doesn't recognize you...

Roll me a 1d20+4 for how well this goes.

Additional +3 if you can end thoughts about if your evil, cruel, etc. +2 if you can get him to recognize you.

Rolled 18 + 4 (1d20 + 4)

>>889941
Obviously just shapeshift to elf. Pray like a motherfucker that Mikhail's mom isn't around, too.

Rolled 11 + 4 (1d20 + 4)

>>889941
Personally I would give him the title of master of ordnance or something. Give him supervision over the weapons we use in our army. Also shapeshift into an Elf.

18+6=24

Good Success

You shapeshift to an elf... And begin to talk to Sherman.

You hit it off fairly well, and organize a contract...

"So, twenty-thousand now?"

"Yep."

"I like it mister. You have a deal."

"Thanks... Now, of course, there's a few guards..."

You walk past a guard who says Pythos is being trained at a training camp and he'll be back in three or so months. You nod and continue to introduce Sherman to the guards... And the Yuan-Ti Lifeguards, who he'll command over.

You go back to relaxing, and watch the TV... Apparently some group called the Viet Cong in Vietnam is trying to break away or something, and some US Senator called McCarthy called your son a "closet fascist" and his supporters closet fascists or something. Oh.. And apparently there's a coup in Persia to take out the current Shah...

Man, there's a lot of news...

Actions

>...Just continue to watch the TV. There's a lot of events you don't know about happening...
>...Rebels in Vietnam? Wait... Isn't Vietnam... Isn't Vietnam vassals of France, who are vassals of you?
>You should take care of this McCarthy character for your son. It'll get you a few favors from him, at the least.
>Nah, do something else. Something... Sciency. With science.
>See local news in Sweden.
>Write-In

>>890107
>...Rebels in Vietnam? Wait... Isn't Vietnam... Isn't Vietnam vassals of France, who are vassals of you?


Pop by and see the Iranian shah while we are at it. Seems he could use a hand...

>>890107
>...Rebels in Vietnam? Wait... Isn't Vietnam... Isn't Vietnam vassals of France, who are vassals of you?
>You should take care of this McCarthy character for your son. It'll get you a few favors from him, at the least.
Por que no los dos?
We can cook up a plan to do both.

>>890113
This

You decide to investigate to see if your required to enter into this Vietnam thing...

Of course, it seems like since France is your vassal and Vietnam is it's vassal...
Basically, if you don't help them there's a good chance France hates you even more, and along with Reuviere. And it'll lower you prestige for letting a nation under you break away...

But they're just poorly armed and funded communist Viet Cong. It shouldn't be too much of a problem... Too bad you can't go into jungles that hot...

Actions

>Call Charlemagne and redirect him to Vietnam, Renexizia can take over Korea by herself.
>Send a division to VIetnam! (Imperial Division or Russian Division)
>Send a personal regiment to Vietnam.
>Send Renexizia to Vietnam?
>Nah... You'll decide this later.
>Fuck Vietnam, it's a piece of shit land anyways... Just let the French deal with it.
>Write-In

>>890160
>Viet Cong
Send some dwarven soldiers.
Fuck the Viet Cong and their underground tunnels.

>>890160
>Send a division to VIetnam! (Imperial Division or Russian Division)
>Send a personal regiment to Vietnam.
What the difference between a imperial and Russian division?

>>890168
Imperial Division is Swedish soldiers, while Russian Divisions is basically the loyalist Russians... Who are actually numbered enough to count as an entire division. They're also led by George Zhukov.
Also they have about the same quality of your soldiers... Which is kind of saying something.

>>890160
>Send a division to VIetnam! (Imperial Division or Russian Division)


Russian division, swedes are too valuable.

>>890176
We should send Swedish troops to put down the viet cong. It'll boost relations better with France better then a Russian division would.

>>890183
Why not both? More troops can't hurt our odds.

>>890192
We should send some dwarven soldiers.
Burrowing will be invaluable.
Some Witchers would be good too.

>>890192
Less Swedish troops would mean less prestige for Sweden. Russians taking all the glory doesn't sound too good.

>>890215
The Russians are Swedish; they are our citizens not slaves, mercenaries or such. It is better to unite them under that banner of nationalism than separate them.

>>890229
Oh yes.
We should probably also change the name of our empire.
We aren't a holy empire anymore

>>890229
>The Russians are Swedish
Cyka blyat

>>890239
The Russians are our citizens.
We should unite our empire and assimilate into one culture.
A superior latin culture.

You decide to send both divisions...

How much are you sending in manpower? (This is split 50/50 between both divisions!)

>Send the trained soldiers. (One million will leave for Vietnam!)
>Limited conscripted soldiers will go. (Three million will leave for Vietnam.)
>All of your current conscripted soldiers will go... Leaving only the garrisons. (Seven million will leave for Vietnam!)
>See if you can get the Dwarves to help?
>Maybe the Chinese can help?
>Maybe you can get America to help?
>The British, why not? Your married to their Queen!
>Write-In

>>890260
>See if you can get the Dwarves to help
>Send the trained soldiers. (One million will leave for Vietnam!)

Quality trumps quantity in this situation.

>>890247
True. I was just poking fun of Russians being called Swedes. It's like calling Canadians Australians when they were under the British empire.

>>890260
>Send the trained soldiers. (One million will leave for Vietnam!)
I really want to see our military organization and amount of soldiers. Organize everything into stuff like divisions.

>>890260
>Send the trained soldiers. (One million will leave for Vietnam!)

>Write-In
Get the nation's newspapers, TV and radio stations together for a press conference.

Start producing our combat drug and educating the sent troops as to it's effects. If they are willing to use it, they shall be separated (at the squad or such level, no breaking up of teams) into strike teams and such. The rest as well as those who have reached "safe maximum dosage" levels will perform patrols, base security and such.

>>890297
We should also hand out the Witcher mutagen.
Enhanced senses and disease resistance can only be helpful.
While I still consider it unfinished it'll have to do.

>>890306
You ever read the sci-fi story about the race obsessed with creating the perfect war machine, to defeat their inferior enemy? They lost, whilst they waited on wonder weapons their enemies took ground, by the time they had something "good enough" for them it was too late.


We must not fall to such folly. Happy is that nation which in times of peace thinks of war and happier still is that nation which in times of peace has prepared for war.

>>890343
Oh I've that story. It's called real like and one faction called the Nazi did just this.

>>890343
I acknowledge this.
Hence why I desire to release it now.
Even unfinished it gives us a necessary edge.
We can refine it later and hand out a superior version later.
For now the incomplete variant shall work.

You decide to send the trained soldiers to Vietnam... You also decide to pop by Persia in a while... But you settle for watching the news some more.

Apparently German fell for the Holohoax joke, as apparently they're repaying Israeli for all the damage done during WW2... Fucking cuckolds...

Oh, and Elizabeth has apparently has allowed women to join the House of Lords, and some group called the IRA in Ireland have done a terrorist attack to gain the independence of Ireland... Oh, and apparently there was an ad for a COLORED TV.
Holy shit, you are so fucking getting that.

And finally, in world news, apparently the USA has learned how to put... Nukes. On submarines.

Fuck.

Well... Seems like Viktor is using his nuclear tech to full use.

Of course, now you should decide what to do about Persia...

Actions

>Try a military intervention?
>Offer the Shah of Persia refuge?
>Personally go to Persia.
>Offer soldiers the new mutagen... You know, the stronger human genome?
>See about raiding Persia with your mom?
>Write-In

>>890365
>Offer the Shah of Persia refuge?
>Offer soldiers the new mutagen... You know, the stronger human genome?

>>890367
This.

>>890365
>Offer soldiers the new mutagen... You know, the stronger human genome?
Can we even survive in Persia?

Also how the hell did they get nuclear missiles already?
America didn't get to space yet right?

>>890371
Nope but even if they did our advanced tech will allow us to surpass them. Even more so if we can get the patents on dragon steel.

>>890371
Persia isn't that hostile of an environment. A good portion of it is mountains with big forests.

>>890371
Right now it's short range, visible distance, not really "go into the atmosphere" ICBM.

Basically useless except for Allah Ackbar moments.

We should make an H bomb.
We could do it.
Just finish our rocketry and make hydrogen isotopes.

>>890405
Nope, we are going non-nuclear super power. Instead we will create a network of space stations with a large laser cannons, to destroy any form of space craft and to defend our interests.

You decide to offer humans the chance to be better! Roll me a 1d20+2 for how many do this! Additional +2 for catchy slogans! Additional +2 if you can come up with a good name for the mutagen that is not Witcher!

Rolled 14 + 2 (1d20 + 2)

>>890405
We could make non-nuclear super weapons. Instead of going into nuclear science from the ground up, improve on something like dragonfeul which is incredibly explosive. There's also no nuclear fallout.

Rolled 19 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>890428
"R.E.M" - "Race Enhancement Mutagen"

"A better you, for a better world"

Rolled 7 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>890428
>Go beyond normal humanity and evolve.
We could call the new humans the Enhanced?
Enhance mutagen?
It's really what it does.
>>890439
What about orbital rods?

>>890478
Orbital weaponry like this and >>890423 do sound good considering they're more sci-if then just plain old nukes and don't have the radioactive effect. Although it might take some time since we haven't even launched a satellite like Sputnik

>>890492
We have launched rockets high into the atmosphere so we have the potential.
We just need to calculate the necessary fuel and build the ship.

We'll also need computers for the satellites.

Also we could drop a orbital rod in a fault line in California (iirc there is one there) and utterly fuck it up.

You decide to call it REM... And those who take it, the Enhanced.

It proves to be rather popular among the troops... Now of course, you send a letter to the Shah of Persia, saying he can take refuge in your realm.

You continue to work...
When you hear a knock at the door... It seems to be Lorriana, who's smiling quite satisfied from something.

Actions

>Go answer the door?
>...Oh boy oh boy, new science to play with!
>Tell her to go away, your in the middle of something.
>Write-In

>>890492
We have steel five times as strong as an equivalent non-draconian alloy, far better computers, far better rocket fuel and such.


Assuming we get a critical roll, we will create something really good.

>>890507
>...Oh boy oh boy, new science to play with!

>>890505
I'm just thinking about how we would build or get a space station in orbit. That just sounds like a arduous task.

>>890507
>Go answer the door?
I don't like this for some reason.
She better not have bought the patent for dragon steel.

>>890519
We're a genius.
We could just design a computer to calculate this shit for us.

The real problem would be money.
We also need wireless internet.

>>890519
>>890525
Actually we could do it right now; what I am worried about is operational security, if we lose the documents then another nation gains a huge boon. God help us if the Americans get it.

>>890525
But how would we actually construct the station itself.

>>890552
The same way the ISS was built
Sending up the pieces one by one.
We also need to design space suits.
>>890551
Our security system is actually unbreakable.
Since I or some other anon rolled a crit designing it.
The only way they're getting in is if someone has the title and security string. Which we shouldn't give to anyone.

>>890552
Quite easily; dragon steel frame (generates heat, holds it structural tight, etc), lead lining (keeps the radiation out), asbestos lining (keeps the heat in), our computers and such.


As to the life support stuff; carbon scrubbers are easy to make, oxygen creation is also quite simple yet we could just add a farm and call it a day as to atmospheric maintenance.

>>890571
That is for our computers; we still have engineers, factories, scientists and such under us who know shit. Not to mention diagrams and blueprints.

You go up to the door...

"What is it?"

"Well... Guess what?"

"...What?"

"You remember the crystal I was trying to refine?"

"Yes? The red ones?"

"Well... I found a way to use it as an energy source..."

After a rather complicated explanation of enriching and tuning the crystals... Apparently they can give off enough energy to power a house, just for a human-sized crystal... Though it may seem like a lot, the crystals grow quite fast, and if used give clean energy and produce no detectable pollutants besides smoke from the heat. Not to mention that she seems to regard this technology as rather cheap, and would in theory be the cheapest on the energy market, second to solar panels. The only problem is that the crystals require enough land, similar to a farm, to actually generate enough to power a large section of a city...

Actions

>Make her work on making energy weapons usable for the army!
>Ask her if there's any way to have a "ballistical shield" or something.
>Ask her what might happen if the crystal got loose?
>Make her work on something specific?
>Hug her tightly! She's done good!
>Write-In

>>890588
Well we are still much faster.
We can quite literally outpace them in scientific discovery.
We also have knowledge of modern science which they do not.

And we should probably draft contracts that state handing over our scientific discoveries to other nations counts as treason.

As we gain more and more of the world committing treason becomes a larger offence

>>890577
Dragon steel is expensive and time consuming af to produce. We need to find a way to streamline it.

>>890598
>Ask her if there's any way to have a "ballistical shield" or something.
Nice. I think this trumps nuclear energy in every way possible

>>890598
>Ask her what might happen if the crystal got loose?
>Make her work on making energy weapons usable for the army!
And we can work on rail guns.


We could also develop multi level energy farms for the crystals

"What would happen if the crystals got lose?"

She explains that losing a crystal would heavily hurt the environment, and cause high amounts of pollution and could be very dangerous in high population zones depending on where you dropped it.

"Huh... Try to come up with a ballistical shield, ok? Or laser weapons."

She nods her head and leaves... And you stretch. Today is a good day.
Hey... You wonder if Liz is hungry or not. Maybe you should check.

Roll me a 1d20+6 to see if she's pleased or not with food.

Rolled 6 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>890637
Good thing we solved her murderous appetite.

Rolled 9 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>890637
We need to check in on our blackguard now.
And look for that crystal.

9+6=15

Minor Failure.

You go up, and see one of the slaves feeding your wife grapes.

"Hi Liz. Everything ok?"

"Yeah, a lot better since you gave me that mutagen... And I don't feel nearly as murderous. Just quite hungry."

"Oh. Well, I hope that's going good."

You begin to leave...

"Ren?"

"What?"

"...Do you not want to tumble me because I"m getting fat and pregnant? I mean, I'm sorry about the weight, but I can't really help it..." She seems a little hurt from your comment last night... Or the night before, you honestly forget.

Actions

>I just don't want to hurt the egg at all, Liz.
>...I'm just more mature, I guess. I have science to work on rather then wives to carouse with.
>Well... I mean, if you want, I could tumble you in my human form...
>...Listen, why don't we talk about this later?
>I didn't mean to offend you, sorry.
>I'll give you plenty of tumbles after your done being pregnant, ok?
>Sorry, but I don't like fat women.
>Well, I kinda didn't want to get my dick eaten.
>Write-in

>>890665
>I just don't want to hurt the egg at all, Liz.
>I didn't mean to offend you, sorry.

I just recalled that there is a flaw with laser weaponry iirc.
Something about blooming.
Meaning we can't maintain a directed laser blast once the energy goes past a certain concentration.
>>890665
>It's just that we tumbled while you were pregnant once and it sent you into labor. I'm just worried about the baby.
>I'll give you plenty of tumbles after your done being pregnant, ok?

>>890679
We could make the lasers more powerful by having ultra strong lenses.

>>890706
But that would be concentrating the power.
Basically if there's too much power focused in too small of an area it causes blooming and the energy loses focus and disperses into the air.
It gets worse with fog or dust in said air.

>>890706
But the limit is one megajoule per cubic centimeter.
So I think(think being key here) that icpt can still kill people.
Not sure about ships
And it definitely won't do in a planet.

>>890679
"I don't want to hurt the egg at all... And you were pregnant once and when I tumbled you, it sent you into labor... I'd rather not shatter the egg while it's growing."

"Oh. Sorry, sorry..."

"I didn't mean to offend you, but I'll give you plenty of tumbles once your done being pregnant, ok?"

"...How many times do we tumble per month? I need to do the math."

"About four or five times."

"...Well, you owe me fifteen tumbles by the time this is over. And I can all them on at any time, ok?"

"Sure, I guess. Means more wonderful ass of yours to caress..."

"Your ass is wonderful too, Ren."

"Aw, thanks."

"Yeah... Hey, could you bring me some food? I'm hungry."

Actions

>I'll cook some for you, Liz.
>...Actually, how about no about the fifteen tumbles when your done being pregnant?
>Fine, I guess...
>...Slap her ass?
>I have science to work on though...
>Hey... It's erh, nearly Christmas. I was wondering if you wanted anything.
>...You know Liz... I think we get along just too well.
>Why don't you eat the slave in front of you? I can get another one.
>Write-In

>>890730
>I'll cook some for you, Liz.
>...Slap her ass?

So someone is asking Ren to tumble for a change
The last time I remember something like this was when we got raped iirc.

File: IMG_1541.jpg (25 KB, 275x183)

25 KB JPG

>>890717
>>890727
Shit man. This is getting too complicated.

>>890730
>Hey... It's erh, nearly Christmas. I was wondering if you wanted anything.
What are Liz's interests now? Its been a while since we've talked about that. Just that she's hungry and is a closet German.

>>890750
Well for space fighters we can just use lasers for the smaller ships and use rail guns for fighting the big shit.

Same thing here.
(Also Sniper Rail guns wen)?
>>890730
OP how would White Death feel about us if we got him a tricked out rail gun sniper rifle?

>>890763
Although space combat is probably distant, one tactic we could use is boarding. We have some of the most heavily armed and versatile troops in the shape of Dragotaurs and Half-Dragons respectively. We could capitalize on this and use it to great effect.

>>890763
We should honestly try to make Simo Hayha immortal, or close to it.

>>890947
I feel uncomfortable with the one guy that killed us immortal.
At least not until his loyalty is secured.

>>890987
Well he's not a bad guy, so he won't try to kill us unless we fuck with him or his homeland.

>>891006
Define 'fuck with'
I'd rather not taste exploding sniper rounds for breakfast because we decided to Latinize his homeland.

They do not make a good meal

>>890947
>>890987
He's a Finnish sniper who killed us. It's best we just leave him alone to drink vodka all day while he hunts reindeer.

>>891015
Can we make a mutagen to slowly take his sight?
Drug him and be done with it
>Inb4 he gets better when blind

>>891014
Well, so long as we don't shit on Finland, we can trust him to simply tell us when we do something he doesn't like.

>>891024
Personally I think launching a tactical nuke or chemical gas at his general area is a viable option in neutralizing him.

>>891044
If we're lucky that just might work.
Thankfully I doubt he'd take any mutagen we make.
So no dragon sniper yet.

>>891044
Only way to kill him is old age.

>>891126
Just gotta wait until 2002 then. Although it could be earlier considering medical differences between this timeline and real life and that Queen Elizabeth II died like a year ago.

>>891147
I just remembered.
We need to make a way to prevent us from impregnating Liz before she asks us to tumble her.
Something less wasteful then dragon sized condoms.
Mutagens are still an option

I'm back, sorry for falling asleep anons.

>>890763
He'd be ok with it, but would rather raise his animals .

"Hey, don't worry Liz. I'll cook some for you."

You slap her ass and she laughs and blushes.

"Y-yeah. I erh, that'd be nice, Ren."

"Yeah..."

You however, have not quite to decide to leave her buttocks untouched, and you squeeze a little. Her mouth goes into an o-shape, and the slave on her belly begins to sweat nervously. Elizabeth then goes bright red.

"W-well...."

"So, want me to make dinner for you?"

"I-I erh... I ahm... Sure. That would be great Ren." She says, highly embarrased... You take your hand off of squeezing her adorable ass.

"Good. Oh, nearly forgot... It's nearly Christmas. I was wondering if you wanted anything,,,:"

"Well... Maybe if you could use your hands instead of slapping my erh.... Ass and tail, why don't you you get me some new clothes for my half-dragon form? I mean, my erh... My panties have had a rather ravenous dog take them off of me, set them on fire, and then you have them back to me."

"They weren't on fire..."

"Well, I distinctly remember the smell of burning panties."

"Hey, at least your not Chrysoula."

"Chrysoula? What about her?"

Actions

>She actually lacks a bra, and a lot of stuff. And I think she doesn't have panties, actually. Just saying.
>Conspire to teach Blondi how to steal bras. He's the only wingman you need.
>Well, technically she's about to get a bigger closet then you.
>Hug Elizabeth and ask if you can send slaves to do clothes shoping for her.
>I'll... I'll try my best.
>...If we're going back in, I fucking demand you give me some tumbles.
>Just sigh and leave. Nope out of here.
>...Do you want anything else, Liz?
>Write-In

>>891616
>I don't want to go back to the gulag stalin.
I mean
>I don't want to go back to the clothing store Liz. Please... it's awful.
>She actually lacks a bra, and a lot of stuff. And I think she doesn't have panties, actually. Just saying.

"...I don't wanna go to the gulag Stalin..."
You squeak out.

"What?"

"Nothing! I erh, I just meant that I didn't to go back..."

"Oh... I'd greatly appericate it. Besides, it's fun."

LIES OF HERESY THAT IS NOT FUCKING FUN AT ALL I JUST GOT TO STARE AT A MINOTAUR PUT ON CLOTHES HOLY FUCKING SHIT!

Calm down... We were fortunate to have such massive assets to guide our way.

He's right for once.

You shake out of your internalized despair. Liz shoves the entire bowl of grapes down, and tells the servant to leave, which he does so urgently. She lets out a burp which she covers with a napkin. and wipes her mouth off politely.

"But uh, Chrysoula lacks a bra.... Other stuff, and I suspect... I suspect she doesn't actually have panties."

"Scandalous... Not that I'm going to gossip about it... But there's something I could tell..."

"Please don't gossip about it."

"Well, I'd rather word not get out my husband condones women not wearing undergarments or bras. Would you care if I ask you about it?"

Actions

>Hey, I bought her a ton of bras. Which kind of fit, but not really because they're made for stiff and firm boobs!
>Only slight concern for making Chrysoula bigger. With bigger assets.
>...Seriously, please don't Liz. I don't want people to giggle when they see her.
>...Well, in my opinion there's nothing wrong with going commando. Maybe you should try it.
>Honestly, I think she's TRYING to go commando...
>Let's agree that either way, she looks great.
>...Just saying, your ass is the superior reptilian, scaly, and soft ass.
>I don't like it... Too degenerate in my opinion.
>...I fucking love it. Then again, I am a male.
>Write-In

>>891616
>>She actually lacks a bra, and a lot of stuff. And I think she doesn't have panties, actually. Just saying.
Maybe read that book Chrysoula got us about Greek creatures.

>>891676
>...Seriously, please don't Liz. I don't want people to giggle when they see her.
>I got her underclothes. They just don't really make any in her exact size. If they make any at all.
>...I fucking love it. Then again, I am a male.

We should try our Yuan ti form now.
Seems good a time as any
>>891678
It's a shame we can only get new forms by meeting new creatures in person.

>>891696
We can always just go on another road trip to Greece. Maybe we could see how other species are treated and gain their support in taking over Greece.

We should try to find Sergei Korolev, now that the Soviet Union is gone. Also we can try convince our son to give us Wernher von Braun. This will help with the space program. Also we should look into project orion which is a spacecraft propelled by nukes.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sergei_Korolev
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wernher_von_Braun
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Project_Orion_(nuclear_propulsion)

>>891713
>Uses any sort of propulsion for rockets.
At some distance it becomes useless(read anywhere past Pluto)

"Please don't gossip about it. I don't want people to giggle. I did get her underclothes though... Just nothing in her exact size. But I fucking love it. Just saying."

She shakes her head.

"Ah, I knew you were my husband. I was here thinking you'd at least say "maybe get her some panties" but rather, I hear you say you like women without them." She shakes her head a little bit.

"Is that a bad thing?"

"Well, I don't see why you like women like that. Next thing I know you'll invite a woman who smells like fish to sleep with us, or has a corny Chinese accent..."

"Really? I wouldn't do that.... And I'd give the woman who smells like fish a bath first."

"How unbarbaric of you. Why, I'd think you'd be British at this rate." She says, pretending to be impressed.

Actions

>Ah. Right... You know, I have caught you looking at Chrysoula's boobs... And staring for quite a bit... Do you like her "package" so to speak?|
>Pat Liz on the head?
>I'll go make you some food now, Liz.
>You know, just by saying that I'd think you'd be German from your temperment...
>Hey, I'm not saying you shouldn't wear a bra or panties... But I bet you'd look fucking hot.
>Just saying, I don't tumble Chrysoula often. I can't really afford the costs in property damage.
>How's that cure with Julius's vampirism coming along?
>Test your Yuan-Ti form?
>Write-In

>>891744
>Test your Yuan-Ti form?
>You know, just by saying that I'd think you'd be German from your temperment...

Teasing the closet German.

>>891744
>Pat Liz on the head?
>Test your Yuan-Ti form?
Aren't there different form of Yaun-Ti like some with legs and some without.

>>891758
Yes. But most slither, and all of them have human-like bodies from the chest up at the least. Also, some can have more then two arms.

You pat Liz on the head...

"You know, I just think you'd be German from your temperment."'

"Oh sod off. I can't believe I married such a lout."

"Ah. Well, we're a family of stubby legs..."

"Why oh why was that ever a good idea in your mind?"

"It's adorable... Now... Watch this."

You shapeshift to your yuan-ti form... You have a snakelike body, with white scales, and four arms. Nice...

"Spooky?"

You slither into bed...

"I erh... That's a little strange, Ren."

"Come on. It feels fine."

"I erh... Right."

You kiss your wife, and find you have a rather snakelike tongue... Like that of a serpent.

"Ren? Just a question... Could you uh... Smooth over relations with the slaves for me?"

"Why?"

"They're.... They're angry at me for eating them. I didn't mean it... Well... Maybe some dark part of me... But if you could do that..."

Actions

>I got it.
>Say no more, Ren will help you with your slave problem.
>Who cares if they like you Liz?
>Honestly, you should just start whipping them at this point.
>Hey, Liz... Why do you not argue with Chrysoula but argue with Frankizka?
>Eat one or two, Liz, and force them to like you.
>Pat her on the head with FOUR of your arms. Ha!
>Write-In

You have also learned that you can do two attacks per round in your Yuan-Ti form.

>>891805
>I got it.

>>891805
>I got it.


>Two attacks per turn
Wew
Did we ever find out what our halfling form does?
I assume traps disarming and stealth.

Doesn't this mean we can wield two katanas?

>>891816
Yes, yes it does.

"I got it. I'll look into it."

She kisses you.

"Thanks. I just don't want people to think I'm somesort of bloodthirsty monster who's hellbent on eating people, ok?"

You return her kiss.

"Yeah, don't worry... Anyways, I'll be back in a bit, ok?"

"Ren... Just wait a minute. I have two questions."

"What?"

"Well... I haven't really gone outside while I've been pregnant... So maybe the two of us should go to a restaurant to get some nice air? Also... Is there any way for me to be... Well... Mammalian again?"

"Mammalian? Why?"

"I just... Well, I find eggs growing in my womb to be... It's weird, ok? Also... It'd hurt a lot less."

"Hurt?"

"Well... About every day it gets bigger... And my body doesn't exactly grow with it... And for hell's sake, just feel my belly."

You press it... And it feels as hard as steel. That is one durable egg.

"Oh... That's uh..."

"Don't worry, don't worry. It's not going to cause my chest to explode or anything... It's just really painful while my body tries to adjust to it..."

"Oh... Well... I'll think about it."

"Right... I don't know for how much longer I'll be able to walk."

"You aren't that fat yet. You just look chunky."

"Ren... It feels like I'm carrying crates in my belly."

"Yeah... It probably doesn't help that it's going to be like this for five months."

"...That long?"

"Yep."

"Well... I erh... That's going to be a painful and long few months..."

"Yeah... So about that restaurant..."

Actions

>...Well, I think that'd be nice to get out of the house...
>Nah... Sorry. I have lots of work to do.
>...Why don't the two of us go raid a village in South America or something?
>I'd rather not have you go berserk and eat everyone's dinner, Liz.
>I don't know about moving you... What if you fall or something?
>Write-In

>>891867
>I don't know about moving you... What if you fall or something?
Now we just design a new sword style based around that.

>>891867
>...Well, I think that'd be nice to get out of the house...
>Having an egg like that isn't so bad. Female Mammals have eggs too, just softer and they keep it inside of them.

"I don't know about moving you. What if you fall or something?"

"Ren... It's as hard as a fucking rock. I think I'll be fine."

"...Well... Maybe. But having a egg like that isn't so bad. Female mammals have eggs too. Just softer and they keep it inside of them."

"Ren, unless you were female and had a giant egg growing in you... Which not only impeded your movements, but moving wrong hurt like hell, you'd want to be mammalian..."

"Males have kidney stones."

"...I know, but I don't think that's really as bad as what I'm going through..."

"Well, it's comparable."

"Have you ever had one?"

"...No. I mean, I could take a piss in other forms, and goodbye kidney stone..."

"...I want to get out of the house before I'm unable to, ok?"

Actions

>Fine, fine... We'll get out of the house.
>I'm not worried about the egg falling. I'm worried about you falling.
>Please stay home...
>Can we take someone with us?
>Liz... Kidney stones are worse, and we get them far more often.
>...I'm sorry that you have to go through this, Liz.
>Just don't drink any alcohol, ok?
>Well, if our child's egg is this strong, think about how strong our child will be.
>...And to think, we have sex so much that pregnancy is actually a common thing.
>Write-In

>>891894
>Fine, fine... We'll get out of the house.
>...I'm sorry that you have to go through this, Liz.
>Well, if our child's egg is this strong, think about how strong our child will be.
So how much longer in game is Liz going to be pregnant? For like another bajillion threads or what.

>>891911
For a while, until anons decide to go back to civ mode.

But since your in tech grinding mode, it'll be quite a while.

So maybe three threads or five depending on what happens. Maybe even two.

"Fine, fine. We'll get out of the house. I'm sorry you have to go through this though."

"Don't worry Ren... I can handle it."

"Yeah. Well, if our child's egg is this strong, think about how strong our kid will be. Anyways... I should make you some food, eh?"

She happily smiles.

"That'd be nice. Thank you, Ren."

You go and begin to make some food for your wife...

HEY, IT'S ME. KHORNE.

Oh, hey. What did you want?

JUST COMING AROUND TO SAY THAT SLAANESH IS BUSY AND DISTRACTED. SO YOU CAN COME TO THE COOL DIMENSION.

Really? Cool.

YEAH. ALSO, MY SECRETARY IS OFF WORK IN CASE YOU WANT TO TALK TO HER. SHE'S KILLING NURGLITES RIGHT NOW.

Cool, cool.

Actions

>Thanks for the heads up, Khorne.
>I'll see you later, ok?
>...I don't think I'll be back for a while. I'm kind of busy.
>How's Constaniza doing? And the shield maiden, Raghilda?
>Anything interesting happening there?
>How's my brother? Is he still pissed at me?
>Write-In

>>891956
>...I don't think I'll be back for a while. I'm kind of busy.
>I'll see you later, ok?
What are some stuff we can do that counts as Civ mode?

>>891963
Occasionally I'll do a "take direct control" thing that moves time by months and allows for better control over your nation.

I don't think I'll be back for a while. I'm kind of busy. I'll see you later, ok?

YEAH, SEE YOU. AND REMEMBER, A FIELD DEDICATED TO ME WOULD BE NICE.

He hangs up, and you bring your wife a large meal... She tears into it and eats it quite fast, giving you a kiss afterwards.

You leave... Man, you can wait to do science...
That's when you run into your dad.
Who hugs you.

"Thank you, thank you so much son."

"Oh, hey dad."

"I owe you one... She erh... She went a little crazy."

"Who, mom?"

"...She spent nearly half a million last night, just trying to get clothes..."

"Oh... Yeah, I saw you."

"I saw you too, with your minotaur wife."

"Yeah..."

"...I don't know who invented those damned department stores. It's a sign of Ragnarok, I tell you... Anyways, son... I think you should stay away from her."

"Why?"

"She got you a lot of clothes for you to try on. And for me."

"Oh..."

"...And for my grandkids... And some clothes for your wives."

"Yeah. So Mom's kind of in mom mode?"

"Yeah... Also... I erh, I found this book in her room."

He hands you a Lord of the Ring book, and breaks the hug...

"Your mom told me to give it to you... And she's also apparently hoping you'll go raid with her."

"She seems to really want to do that."

"...Personally, I think she wants some company besides you and me. She's just itching for an excuse to say hi to us or go anywhere with us."

"Yeah..."

"Anyways... Unless you feel like becoming a dress up doll, stay away from your mom, alright?"

Actions

>Yeah, thanks for telling me Dad.
>I don't think it would be that bad.
>...Hey... Do you actually know any of my wives?
>...So why is mom so... Maternal abut me?
>Thanks for telling me.
>...Why does mom want slaves anyways?
>Can you give mom a timeframe for me?
>Write-in

>>892036
>Yeah, thanks for telling me Dad.
Oh my god... this is triggering muh PTSD from my grandma. Such awful memories... *shutters*

"Thanks for telling me dad."

"No problem... Just uh, she'll probably try and hunt you down later so you can try on clothes, ok?"

"Great..."

"It's your mother, son. Also, she had some slaves sew for her... Which I guess is her version of homemade shirts. They're decent, actually. Mostly tanktops... But there's a lot."

"Oh..."

"...Anyways, if your mom comes around, just remember what I told you."

You nod your head and leave...

Roll me a 1d20+6 to evade your mom. Additional +2 if you can think about what she'll do to you...

Rolled 6 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>892075
Unimaginable things. Telling us to do stuff and do more stuff. Oh the horror!

Rolled 7 + 8 (1d20 + 8)

>>892075
Also the clothes are all going to be in bad taste. There's no way she knows my style and what looks good on me.

Allowing samefagging to avoid capture.

But anons, is getting captured by your loving mom such a bad thing? She might even read you a book or do things for you.

Rolled 14 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>892086
Must build... Draconic empire.... must get shit done...

14+8=22

Success!

You very nearly run into your mom, who seems to be searching for you. Why does everyone want to talk today? You have cool things you could be doing...

Fuck... And eventually she'll check the basement and find you there...

Goddamn it, there's no winning. Now, you need to think...

You head back to the basement to continue to work on the computer, trying to make that GAME you made less shit and more "oh hey this does things" besides move a cursor.

Roll me a 1d20+6, additional +3 if you can think on how to not get your mom to check the basement to find you.

Rolled 15 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>892097
Free some slaves and have them act as bait. Karesteina will eat that right up.

15+6=21

Success!

You release some slaves and tell them to fuck around your mom, and you begin to work on the computer... You make Ping way better, as there's a ball which reflects off the cursors.

Good enough.

Of course... You kinda look at the nazi computer... Maybe the Nazis have a good example of a clear, aryan game for the youth to play?

Actions

>Nah... Don't look. Their games are probably incompatible or something.
>...Fuck it, why not?
>Well, Claw was addicted to one of the games on the nazi computer. Download it onto a computer and send him a third computer with the game he liked so much...
>...Maybe you should get this Bismark guy down to see if your doing it right.
>Nah. Work on something else.
>Write-In

>>892122
>Nah. Work on something else.
Try and design railguns.

You have an idea... Railguns. Hm... But you need magnets...

Roll me a 1d20+6 to come up with concepts and theories about how to make a railgun!
+3 if you can continue to hide your position from your mom. Also, a +1 if you can come up with a dragony name for a railgun.

Rolled 12 + 7 (1d20 + 7)

>>892132
A Drake cannon.

Allowing samefagging.

Rolled 16 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>892141

Rolled 18 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>892132

18+6=24

Good Success!

You have a few theories on how to make a Drake Cannon... But they're quite far-fetched... For example, you'd need to come up with an accelerator... And the design would need to avoid overheating...

Roll me a 1d20+6 to come up with what could possibly be a good accelerator for the Drake Cannon in order to speed up projectiles! Additional +5 if you can come up with an accelerator!

Rolled 11 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>892171

Allowing samefagging for ideas.

Rolled 4 + 11 (1d20 + 11)

>>892179
I don't know a lot about science like this but here's an idea. Put in text dedicated to Jupiter or possibly another Roman god like Diana to help accelerate the the projectiles being fired.

Rolled 15 + 11 (1d20 + 11)

>>892179
Text dedicated to Mars, God of war, so he may guide our shells as they head towards the enemy.

15+6=21

Success!

You come up with a limited idea... Mostly some text and words just so the Roman Gods get a helping hand, But you think just using electricity might help... But how would you generate enough electricity going in a certain direction... And not to mention, a power source and a...

Jesus, this is going to be hard...

Well, hold on. What if, like a bullet there was an explosion to propel the metal? But that just makes it a gun... Unless there's some way you can speed it up... So explosion is out of there... Electricity it is. Maybe you can hook a capacitor up somehow...

Roll me a 1d20+6 for general progress and if you get past the idea stage finally... Also, a +3 if you want to describe how the Drake Cannon would potentially look...

Rolled 14 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>892211

File: IMG_1546.jpg (74 KB, 1336x590)

74 KB JPG

Rolled 3 + 9 (1d20 + 9)

>>892211
It would our probably something like pic related. Ren could've seen it in the workshop for some sci-fi game.

14+9=23

Success!

So... You have a very crude design. It sucks ass, practically, but could be very cool.

Mostly because in theory plasma build up would overheat the gun, either causing it to fucking explode, or melt in someone's hands. So that's great. Or the battery explodes. Which is fun. Because there's some heavy fucking acid in that.

In addition, if someone was to hold a handheld model... It would... Well, it would weigh like a motherfucker. And firing it has enough recoil that it could take off arms if not used carefully enough. And the batteries are just... Well, they're too shitty to actually use. You need bigger and better batteries to have a chance to use this beyond two shots.

This is only the handheld model... And the science is faulty behind it... So in theory it could just explode or fuck up somehow.

Actions

>...Try to take a gun and convert it to a railgun... This is the most likely to fail, but in theory could be used by troops, but be the least effective.
>Make a handheld Drake Cannon. This version is the likely to fail and will only be available as heavy equipment to big troops, like half-dragons and dragotaurs. Or as a weapon emplacement.
>Make a static Drake Cannon on ships and potentially airplanes.
>...Make artillery Railguns. They're practically useless for doing anything on Earth... But hell, maybe you can make them fire into orbit? Like a... Nuclear Defense Weapon... In case nuclear rockets get made. This is the most expensive option, and likely to fail thanks to complications or budget difficulties.

>>892249
>Make a static Drake Cannon on ships and potentially airplanes.
May as well design new ships to go with these railguns.

I'm getting some sleep, sorry anons.

>>892281
Night

You decide to try and make static emplacements of the Drake Cannon on ships and airplanes.

Of course, you spend nearly an hour designing what the battery should even be, and after many explosions, you have a certain feeling that the blackguard should be back by now with that crystal...

This is when you get the idea that... Well, Gauss and Rail Guns are quite similar... And you decide to compare it for a while...

Thankfully due to your science books you've had your slaves copy down and into written word rather then "slightly singed" word, you find a rather interesting thing...

Mostly that Gauss would be far less expensive, and battery wise, much better since it isn't using electromagnetic fields to rely on actually propelling the bullet, while Gauss weaponry just use magnet technology turned on and off at the right times to force a bullet out of a gun...

So you decide to give hand-held advanced ballistics the "Gauss" tag, and heavier advanced ballistics the "Railgun" tag.

...Now what to fucking do?

>Maybe you should research Gauss firearms? They're far easier to begin with, and could be seriously cost-effective against heavy armor and tanks.
>Research laser firearms? Who needs recoil when you have LASER BEAMS?
>Research Railguns? The art of causing things to explode from debris will be yours! Muahaha!
>Write-In

>>892472
>Maybe you should research Gauss firearms? They're far easier to begin with, and could be seriously cost-effective against heavy armor and tanks.

Going to wait fifteen more minutes anons.

You decide to look into the theory of Gauss weaponry... Starting with a small pistol. You can always scale it up.

Roll me a 1d20+6 to see if you can figure out a theory to make a working Gauss weapon...

Additional +2 if you could come up with a dragony name for a small Gauss weapon, like a pistol.
Also a +2 if you can continue to come up with idea to hide your position from your mom.

Rolled 4 + 8 (1d20 + 8)

>>892566
Put a sign on the outside of the door saying "Please use the front door. Staff only past here."

Rolled 7 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>892566

Rolled 17 (1d20)

17+8=25

Good Success!

You finally come up with a few theories for a Gauss gun... Hopefully your mom doesn't find you... But in order to make the Gauss gun a possibility, along with a Railgun, your going to need to do a lot of minor research and it'll take a few months...

After a while, you yawn and leave your laboratory... What to do, what to do... Your way too exhausted mentally to work on science today.

Actions

>Go and find your mom? Get the clothes part over with...
>Maybe say hi to one of your wives?
>Find that crystal! You don't want crystals growing below Stockholm!
>You know, you should take direct control... It'll be worth it in the long run.
>See one of your kids?
>Visit the university?
>Write-in

>>892625
>Find that crystal! You don't want crystals growing below Stockholm!


We are not dealing with crystal monsters right now.

>>892625
>Find that crystal! You don't want crystals growing below Stockholm!

Although can we have an update regarding Korea real quick. Like how much of it do we control and other reports the might be important.

>>892628
This.

Renexizia and Charlemagne are just about to arrive in Korea, and a few of your soldiers.

You decide to deal with the crystal underground in the sewers...

Actions

>Send your elven blackguard to find it, the one you resurrected and don't like!
>Go personally!
>Send a personal regiment to find it
>Send a wife!
>Maybe just tell the sewer maintenance to keep an eye out for a red crystal.
>...It might of gone out to the ocean... Maybe Lynea can help you?
>Write-In

>>892638
>Go personally!
>Send a personal regiment to find it


We will handle extracting it, they are just there to cover ground and secure areas.

>>892638
>Go personally!
>Send a personal regiment to find it
What exactly is the crystal and why are we looking for it. I wasn't here when stuff happened.

>>892655
Long story short, we once performed terafoming in Siberia. It made draconian tiberium and we found it could be used as a source of power, to rival nuclear energy in output.

We did find out however it effects wildlife, grows by itself and therefore we could face a "crystal world" scenario if it is not contained properly. If we fail here, then this region will slowly become infested and spread.

Killing the infected wouldn't help much either, the crystalline growths may still spread from their corpses and cause new sites to start.

>>892655
It's red tiberium.
Highly toxic and it grows.

You decide to go personally and you send the First Draconic Corps.

Roll me a 1d20 to see if you find it. Only first roll accepted.

Rolled 16 (1d20)

>>892673
At least if we fail the crystals will look cool.

>>892676
We will however lose a city and probably have to ask our son to nuke it.

Rolled 6 (1d20)

Border Check anon, roll me a 1d20 and I'll roll you a 1d20. Only first roll accepted.

Rolled 11 (1d20)

>>892683
Hopefully we don't fuck this up

6 vs 11

Success!

You find the crystal drifting down a sewer pipe, and you hear water falling towards the direction the crystal is going as you explore... It seems to be draining out to the sea... Which means...

Shit, you need to get that crystal before it drains out into the sea!
Why is Agility your dumpstat?
WHY!?

Roll me a 1d20-4 to try and grab it! Additional +1 if you can regret making Agility your dumpstat.

Rolled 1 - 4 (1d20 - 4)

>>892697
I never intended for it to be the dump stat, it just kinda happened and I rolled with that fact.

>>892716
WHHHYY!


I would like to apologise to the people of earth, to the dice gods and to everyone else. I think I fucked up...


Barbaric? Pls?

Barbaric?

>Yes!
>No!

>>892722
>Yes!

Roll me a 1d20 for barbarically getting a crystal.

Rolled 2 (1d20)

>>892744

Rolled 15 (1d20)

>>892744

15

Borderline Failure!

You lunge out to grab the crystal, but fall in the sewage. You crawl desperately to get the crystal....

Roll me a 1d20 and only first roll taken.

Bumping.

Rolled 18 (1d20)

>>892916
>15 is fail
Hoo boy, we're screwed.

Minor Success!

You grab the crystal from the sewage, and begin to get up... Wow, that was a close one. And you need a bath. You recall your men back to the palace... You smell like feces, great.
Sewers suck, long story short.

You get out of the sewers and head back home to take a bath...

Roll me a 1d20+5 to avoid your mom to prevent you from losing time and forced to delay your world conquest!

Rolled 12 + 5 (1d20 + 5)

>>893114

Rolled 7 + 5 (1d20 + 5)

>>893114
>18 is minor success

Holy shit, QM!

>>893128

Allowing a samefag.

>>893128
To be fair, we are very, very low agility. I mean we have to get better at it levels of low.

Rolled 7 + 5 (1d20 + 5)

>>893114

12+5=17

Minor Success!

You evade your mother, and get back home... Of course, there's this stinking smell about you... Putrid, smelly...
God, fuck sewers.


>Take a bath.
>Take a bath with someone?
>Nah. That's just the smell of hard work. Go do more work!
>Write-In

I'll be back in two or so hours anons, sorry.

>>893227
>Take a bath.

>>893227
>Take a bath.
>>893163
It's because of large mutations among other things and it doesn't help we have stubby dwarf legs.

>>893227
>Take a bath.

>>893418
I think the stubby legs gave us -1 agility.

>>893482
It in fact did.
Part of the reason I want it undone.
We really need to train our agility with stretches and running an shit.
And not having stubby legs

>>893495
Well it was a unstable mutagen, maybe even ultra-unstable iirc, I think we're relatively lucky. The only issue was Ren's reaction since bad agility is nothing new to us.

>>893522
Yeah but it reminds me that dodging is something we can't do.
It doesn't hurt to shore up a weakness.
Maybe make it not a minus.

You take a bath by your lonesome... And decide to just relax. Comfy, not having anything to do, research... Work on. Rescue people...

You hear a knock on the door.

"Hey... Ren?"

It seems to be Chrysoula.

"What? I'm in the middle of a bath."

"Oh, sorry, sorry. I just wanted to apologize for last night... How I kind of tumbled you in public. I didn't really know that other people were out there. Also, sorry about breaking your car..." She says rather shyly...

Actions

>It's fine, Chrysoula.
>Seriously? I don't really care where we tumble at, Chrysoula.
>I love you too, Chrysoula.
>...I'm in the middle of something. Can we talk later?
>Hey uh... Is my mom still looking for me?
>Get in here, and maybe we can talk about apologizies.
>Write-In

>>894147
>Seriously? I don't really care where we tumble at, Chrysoula.
>I love you too, Chrysoula.

>>894147
>Seriously? I don't really care where we tumble at, Chrysoula.
>I love you too, Chrysoula.
Once we finish computers we have access to automated systems and can atomize industries

>>894255
I hope you mean automate, as I must insist we don't nuke our factories if you really do mean atomise. It is bad for the economy I am told...

>>894301
I mean automate.
We should also take up stretching and swimming.
To make our agility less shit.
We should also spend time with our mother.
As much as I hate to say she's feeling lonely currently.(, reminder that a servant conveniently disappeared not too long ago)

>>894314
Oh most certainly, do you think we could get the navy to sail us and our wives / some of our family over to Cuba for a "holiday"? Or would we be better off just going ourselves...

>>894404
I think it should just be us and our mother.
If only we could do that white fire trick again.

What are the odds of us finding more nukes to eat?
We could cure our stubby legs in one go.

"Seriously? I don't really care where we tumble at, Chrysoula."

"Oh... Well... I erh, ok. I just wanted to apologize to you, ok?"

"Yeah, it's fine. I love you too, Chrysoula."

"Yeah... Hey, mind if I ask why your taking a bath?"

"I fell in a sewer. Don't tell Liz, she won't remain twelve feet of me."

"Really? Why did you fall in a sewer?"

"Long story."

Hey uh... After this, can I spend some personal time with Chrysoula, please?

Really?

...Yeah. I haven't been with her for a while.

Actions

>I mean, if you want, sure.
>Could we get her in the bath with us? Just saying.
>Nah, I'm in the middle of something.
>Just avoid our mom, ok?
>Write-in

>>895183
>I mean, if you want, sure.
We can use this time to rest mentally.
We could play a mental campaign of D&D

>>895183
>I mean, if you want, sure.
>Just avoid our mom, ok?

I mean, if you want, sure.

Great.

You decide to rest mentally...

So... Anyone up for the second edition of D&D?

Can we play a human only party? I think that would be fun.

You spend the next two hours talking and relax with Chrysoula once you get out of the bath, and Flames seems less tense and more relaxed...
Nice.

You also make a human barbarian and have quite a bit of fun...

Eventually, you regain control, and bid goodbye to Chrysoula... Today's been super active...

This is when you see your mother knocking on the door. She doesn't seem to notice you though...

"Ren? Can you answer the door? I have shirts you need to try on before tomorrow so I can take them back if they don't fit you... Did I mention I'll make you some cookies? Please?"

Actions

>Quickly, flee!
>Oh man, your mom's cookies are damned good... Fine, you'll go through that hell and open the door.
>Tell her to go away!
>Can you do anything better mom?
>Well, you were planning to raid with your mom soon... Why not go with her?
>Get a wife to tell her to go away!
>Write-in

>>895276
>Oh man, your mom's cookies are damned good... Fine, you'll go through that hell and open the door.
Normally I hate trying on clothes.
Only for best mom.
Only reason I'm okay with this.

>>895276
>Oh man, your mom's cookies are damned good... Fine, you'll go through that hell and open the door.
We may as well get it over with.

You sigh. You know what has to be done.

You go up to the door and open it.

"Ren? Thank you." She says, as she enters...

"Let's get this over with, mom."

"Right, I know how much you boys hate trying on clothes. I erh... I got a lot though. I even had some slaves sew you a few shirts and sweaters for all your different forms..."

You go with her, and try on shirts, pants, shoes... You name it. It's torture, but she rewards you with cookies, hugs, and chocolate milk for doing this.
God, please end this.

"...Are we done yet?"

"Sorry... But there's some clothes I got for your kobold form. Could you try them on, please?"

"Fine."

You shift to your kobold form, which gives your mom a smile as she puts sweaters on you, all while holding you up and hugging you.

...So uh, how's everything? Everything up to par, Ren? Was it worth it?

Actions

>...I regret nothing.
>...I guess...
>...I'm just happy this is coming to an end.
>I can't feel my legs. Is that normal?
>...Mom better fucking love me after this....
>At times like this, I remember why I don't want to be a child.
>We need a body double of us so this doesn't happen to me.
>Write-In

>>895327
>Worth it. For best mom

>>895327
>...I guess...
>At times like this, I remember why I don't want to be a child.

I guess... I can remember why I don't want to be a child now.

After a few hours of this, it's nearly midnight, and your mom picks you up as you nearly fall asleep standing up.

"Aw, well... We got through most of them. I'll just take the ones we didn't get to back."

"Huh? Yeah..." You yawn, and your mom smiles and pats you on the head.

"You however, need to get to bed. If you want, I could read a book to you, my brave little drake..."

She hugs you tightly and pats you on the head.

"...Is dad here?"

"He's getting a TV from Hansodr, so he's not coming back for two more days."

"Oh."

She kisses you on the cheek...

"Anyways, what's my little hatchling doing in his spare time anyways?"

"Well... Lots of science, actually. For my global conquest."

"Aw. Nice to see your like your father. I was... Well, never really had a mind for science."

"Really?"

"Yes... Maybe your father had a love for it. I don't really know... But anyways, you need to get to bed, ok?"

Actions

>I mean... I can just drink some coffee and I'll be awake.
>Shift out of your kobold form.
>...Well... Why don't you read Lord of the Rings for me? Please?
>I go to bed when I want to.
>...I'll just go to bed now.
>...Can you read me a book in my bed, rather then yours?
>...Why do you act like such a human mom...
>Write-In

>>895388
>...Well... Why don't you read Lord of the Rings for me? Please?
Her maternal instincts are stronk.

"Why don't you read me Lord of the Rings for me, please?"

She smiles. She apparently wanted that answer. And hugs you even tighter.

"Come on, let's go get that book. Now, where is it?"

"Oh, it's right by my bed."

"Great."

She carries you and goes to find it... So she decides to do some small talk.

"You know Ren, being a parent is quite fun, and a nice change of pace... Just erh, saying."

"I bet, mom."

"Yeah. Oh... By the way... I think in a month I'll have to get back to my world."

"...Really?"

She seems slightly sad.

"Well, if you want you could come with me. But I have work to do, sweetie. Also, who's going to take care of my slaves? Kobolds? I bet as we speak the slaves aren't even being whipped..." She tisks slightly...

"Why do you whip your slaves anyways?"

"Well, they're lazy, indisciplined..." She shakes her head as she continues to talk, and the two of you exit out into the gardens.

"So, anyways Ren... Why don't you whip your slaves? It would better motivate them. No offense, but some of your slaves don't even know their place as fodder..."

Actions

>I erh... Well, my wives would hate it.
>I try to be moral mom.
>Hey, mom? Why do you only have one husband?
>If you want, I could do it.
>Just curious, what's your view of humanity?
>I just don't like the idea of whipping people.
>I'd rather have people follow me out of love then fear, honestly.
>I'm just not that sort of person.
>I would, honestly...
>Write-In

>>895461
>Just curious, what's your view of humanity?

>>895461
>Just curious, what's your view of humanity?
Write-In
>Can you tell me a bit about our family history in your world?

"Hey, mom? What's your view on humanity?"

"Me? Well, besides your father, I think humans make for good slaves..."

"Really? Just that?"

"Well, to be frank I have spent very little time at all interacting with humans. Mostly because I find them quite dull. Besides your father, of course."

"So you've never tried to talk to them?"

"Well, I mean, when I was younger and more optimistic, I tried. Then a mage... Let's just move on, ok? I prefer not thinking about the days I was made into a familiar."

"You were a familiar?"

"Please? Can we move on?"

"...Well, could you tell me a bit about our family history in your world? I'm curious."

"Hm... Well, I'll tell you tomorrow. I wouldn't know where to start, honestly."

"Oh..."

Actions

>...So you've never actually tried to get along with humans?
>Was it bad, being a familiar? Just curious.
>So a mage enslaved you?
>So you'd be ok with just enslaving every and all humans?
>You should try to give humans a second chance. There's some good people out there.
>Hey... So apparently in your dimension I might have a kid called Cortez. Would you mind if I traveled back with you in a month to find him?
>Just wait for mom to find the book?
>Well, not all humans are bad. I was raised among humans, personally.
>If you ruled the world mom, what would you do?
>Write-In

>>895513
>You should try to give humans a second chance. There's some good people out there.

>>895513
>So a mage enslaved you?

How does Ren know about his bastard son Cortez? I only remember him from NEQ.

>>895558
We learned about it when we infiltrated a elven Dominion base.

>>895561
Oh I remember now. Speaking of Elves we should probably do something about the ghettoes.

"So a mage enslaved you?"

"Well... It wasn't even a full on, battlemage. It was just an apprentice of one..." She seems quite embarrassed...

"Really?"

"Right... Let's stop talking."

"Oh. Well... You should try to give humans a second chance."

"Why?"

Roll me a1d20+4 if you can argue for humanity and to at least get her to think about not enslaving them all, or tumbling them.

Additional +2 if you can argue why humans are cool. Or at least not as bad as she thinks they are.

Rolled 1 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>895578
>Sparkman. He is a fucking badass that took a bullet from an elven sniper for my son Viktor. He saved your grandchild. You can't say all humans are bad after hearing that.

Reminder that Sparkman is a badass.
I wish we could hire him.

>>895587
Welp

Critical Failure!

"Well, there's Sparkman. He's a fucking badass that took a bullet from a elven sniper for my son Viktor. He saved your grandchild. You can't say all humans are bad after hearing that."

She seems FURIOUS, holding you so tightly you think your chest might just explode.

"A FUCKING PANSY ELF DARED TO ATTACK MY GRANDCHILD!? I WILL FUCKING BASH THEIR GODDAMNED SKULL IN AND I WILL PERSONALLY FEED THEIR CORPSE TO A FUCKIN' GOAT AND THEN USE THEIR BALLSACK AS A FUCKING PLUNGER FOR MY TOILET!" She says, as she reverts to a Scottish accent, and is red with anger. Man, sometimes being related to dwarves suck.

Oh shit, she is fucking enraged. And now you know where you got your anger from.

Roll me a 1d20+2 to calm down your mom about FUCKING ELVES.

Additional +2 if you can appeal to her inner dwarf sense about FUCKING ELVES. Additional +3 if you can argue that not all elves did this.
And a potential autosuccess if you pander to her maternal instincts to not get angry around her children.

Rolled 9 + 2 (1d20 + 2)

>>895640
>Mother please your frightening me. Please stop.

It's time to pander.

Rolled 6 + 2 (1d20 + 2)

>>895640
Mom, please don't be mad. I don't like it when one of my parents is mad.

Allowing a samefag if you can pander shamelessly to stop your mom from hating elves.

Rolled 13 + 2 (1d20 + 2)

>>895726
>Mother please I just wanted to hear a story. Stop yelling about elves. Also one of your grandchildren is a half elf.

Hold up. IIRC Ren's great-grandfather was half-Dwarf. That means his grandparent is a quarter Dwarf, his mom 1/8th and himself 1/16th. Then all of his kids are 1/32nd Dwarf, even his half-elf son Mikhail. This is crazy.

"Mom, your scaring me. I don't like it when one of my parents are mad... I just wanted you to tell me a story, not yelling about elves... B-besides, one of your kids are a half-elf."

She seems torn between rage, and motherly instinct. She settles on both.

"Fucking fine. I'll read you a story. Fucking treehuggers tryin' to kill me grandchildren... Good for nothing..."

By using tactics from Blondi and Renexizia, your mom begrudgingly gets a book... She's still rather pissed off, so you decide to maybe cheer her up.

Roll me a 1d20+4
Additional +3 if you can do anything adorable, and a +2 if you can make her think about better things then her grandchild nearly getting killed.

Rolled 20 + 4 (1d20 + 4)

>>895761

Rolled 19 + 9 (1d20 + 9)

>>895761
Try to hug her.
Bonus points if we nuzzle against her with our kobold snout(or however that would work)


Does she know Liz is pregnant with another one of her grandchildren?
We should tell her.

>>895749
I think his granddad married a dwarf, right? So it's different.
I think.
I'm drink a bit of scotch right now, so I could be wrong.

Critical Success!

You hug her and nuzzle agianst her with your little snout.

Her heart positively melts, getting out of the gruff Scottish tone.

"Oh, Ren... I'm sorry about yelling. I'm just a little... Agitated." She settles into a nice, maternal tone, and hugs you, holding you close to her head.

"...You know my wife is pregnant, right?"

"Really? Good job Ren... I'm proud of you. And I'm sorry about getting angry around you, ok?" Your mom seems to be hiding the fact she's really happy at having another grandchild... Judging from her happy expression.

"Rweally?" You say, adorably. Her smile turns extra wide.

"Well, of course. I shouldn't get mad around you Ren... Now, why don't I read you a book?"

You cheer happily, and she takes you back.

"By Tiamat, I wish I had more children. If all of them were this cute..." She mutters. You smile happily.

"Mom?"

"What?"

"I love you."

"I love you too, Ren. Say, why don't tomorrow I make up my anger to you?"

"How?"

She thinks a bit.

"Well... Would you like anything?"

Actions

>...Ice cream, please. It'd be nice to be with you more.
>...Why don't we just spend more time with each other? I mean, that'd be the greatest gift of all.
>You don't have to get me anything mom...
>Why don't you make more cookies please?
>Why don't we raid for slaves together?
>...Well... Maybe you could read a book with one of my wives?
>...Hey... Why don't you treat Richard like this?
>Flames, I think Dad is getting laid when he gets back. Hardcore style.
>Smile at your mom being so happy.
>You don't have to make me so much stuff mom, I know you care a lot about me.
>Why don't you get some clothes for my wives?
>Write-In

>>895875
>Why don't you make more cookies please?
>Smile at your mom being so happy.

I know what we could give her.
We could design a printer then guve her the camera.

Then we can give her the pictures printed and a scrapbook.
I think she'd like that

>>895875
>Why don't you tell stories about our family history?
Either way Mikhail is a Dwarf, Elf, Dragon and kind of Human mutt. Then the rest of our kids are also Human, Dragon and dwarf mutts.

"Could you make cookies plwease?"

She smiles.

"...I was thinking... Why don't I make it quadruple butter and double chocalate chip?"

"Really?!"

"Well, I don't see why not. It might take a bit longer."

You hug your mom as hard as possible. Butter is fucking amazing. Chocolate is fucking amazing, your mom is fucking amazing period, full stop.

"Thanks... Why don't you also tell stories about our family history?"

"It's long... And I'm tired. But I'll gladly tell you them tomorrow, ok?"

"Great!"

Your mom carries you back, as some people look on, slightly confused. You eventually get back and she begins to read you the Lord of The Rings book... And makes you cookies.

Which are even better then last time, even though it's huge, about the size of a fist, just because she had to make it bigger to fit everything.
And you eventually pass out on her bed as you eat the giant cookie and listen to your mom. She hugs you tightly, gives you a kiss on your forehead, and lets you sleep in her bed. She goes out to the couch.

You eventually wake up in the morning, relaxed, happy, and cozy. And full.
Cookies tend to do that.

You get up off the bed, and see your mom snoring on the couch, covered up in a small blanket... The entire room still smells like chocolate, butter, and sugar. Your mom has a nice kindly smile on her face as she sleeps, and the dining table in the center of the room is messy with dough, chocolate, and butter...

Actions

>Kiss her to wake her up?
>Shapeshift.
>Waddle out. You have work to do...
>Clean up for your mom?
>...Just uh, climb up onto the couch, and get in her arms. Cuddling with your protective mom when?
>Leave a note for her?
>Write-In

>>895933
>Clean up for your mom?
>Leave a note for her?
Saying we have things to do and thanking her for reading us a story
and that we love her cause she is best Mom

>>895933
>Waddle out. You have work to do...
Maybe just rename the Empire really quick. We aren't really holy anymore.

You clean up for your mom... And leave a note thanking her for reading you a story and being the best mom ever.

You also give her a kiss as you waddle out... And see a note on the door. Probably for you, since it goes up to your face-level.

If your reading this, I'm probably sleeping. Don't try to jump up and open the door, because you'll probably fall and hurt yourself, so instead just pull out a chair and do it, please.
Also, I put the remaining four cookies in a bag on the counter for your lunch, along with a apple juice box, and some cheese.
By the way, I heard that it may be raining, so before you go outside make sure to wear a raincoat, or at least one of my sweaters.
Finally, feel free to ask me at any time if you want to raid. I know how much you enjoy doing that, and I think it would be good for you to get out and see new people.
Love you!

-Karestina.

How sweet. You get the paper bag of your lunch... And you must admit, it's slightly heavier then you expected... Then you finally get up to the door, scoot out a chair, and open it. You could already reach it, but you guess your mom was just concerned about you. You also put on a sweater, and you go out to work. You also decide maybe you should rename the Empire...

Actions

>Keep it the way it is?
>...Take out the word holy. Just The Draconic Swedish Empire works fine.
>Take out Swedish... Put in Draconic Empire instead.
>How about the Byzantine Empire? You hold Constantinople and have a legitimiate claim to becoming the Byzantine Emperor.
>Rome is superior. Declare the Roman Empire...
>Use your inspiration and call yourself the Scandinavian Empire.
>Write-In

>>895986
>Rome is superior. Declare the Roman Empire...

We do hold Rome iirc

>>895986
>Rome is superior. Declare the Roman Empire...
Call it the Dragon or Draconic Roman Empire. In
Latin it would be Imperium Draconis.

You decide to call your empire the Draconic Roman Empire, or the Imperium Draconis.
Hopefully the Kobolds don't get angry about the fact your calling yourself literally the next Rome.

Actually... Maybe you should make sure they don't get pissed at you for doing this.

Actions

>Nah. Let them suck on it.
>...Send the Legate a letter, explaining?
>Get them a gift for their Emperor? Yeah. That'll make them happy.
>Consult the Embassy''s legate?
>Change your mind about renaming the Empire?
>Write-In

>>896082
>Get them a gift for their Emperor? Yeah. That'll make them happy.
A gilded statue of a kobold would do.

>>896082
>Get them a gift for their Emperor? Yeah. That'll make them happy.
We do control the city and have classical temples in it so there's no reason for them to complain that much.

You decide to get them a gift for their Emperor, Like a gilded statute. Hopefully they'll enjoy the gesture.

With that done... You find your chief servant is going up to you.

"Sir?"

"Yes?"

"The kobolds have erh... Completed their fortress."

"Oh, really? That was a short time."

"There's a uh... Well, it's kind of a little heavily armed."

"What do you mean, heavily armed?"

"Well... There's a lot of artillery in there. And anti-air. And traps."

"Really?"

"Two of the slaves were exploded this morning just visiting the fortress-embassy, sir.

"...Really? Damn."

"Also, the kobold's SAM sites are slightly... Easily triggered."

"Really?"

"Well, someone threw a frisbee, my lord... And then a rocket came over and destroyed it."

"...Huh. So even throwing things over it cause them to shoot at it."

"Yes, my lord."

"Well... Just tell me if they start doing anything concerning. And tell them to not lock onto my aircraft."

"Right, my lord. Also, there's been quite a few protests in Stockholm against intervening in Vietnam."

"Really?"

"The average person thinks it's just a war for your personal glory, sir."

Actions

>Well... I'll take care of the protests.
>Can you send the kobolds a bill for those two slaves?
>Who cares? They're going anyways!
>Well, time to address the nation then...
>...Let's reconsider this, actually...
>So NOW they're getting cold feet?
>You know, maybe we should try to figure out how well defended the Kobold fortress is. Could you tell Frankizka to try and spy on it?
>Write-In