Buy a large crossbow from the nearest shop.

I heard ranged is now hip.

I search the town for a Wizard to assist me on my quest.

File: 2_big.png (9 KB, 720x720)

9 KB PNG

>>8294

You would, but you're about as poor as poor can be.

Dance in the town square so we can acquire money to purchase supplies.

Since you're missing both arms, attach the crossbow to your left arm socket and put a flail in the right.

Attempt to remember quest.

go outside, then try to find our inner spirit monster

>>8337
Sell yourself off in the local sex ring for gold coins. In this world of ours, sex is the major business as sex in this world infact, increases MANA

Steal weapons from shoppe and follow up with attaching said weapons to body.

Use those strange boxes floating above you to get a bird's eye view of the town

>>8337

Retrieve arms from chest.

File: 4_big.png (26 KB, 1593x768)

26 KB PNG

>>8392

Years ago, in the real heyday of knighting, your father was the greatest knight. He had wealth, fame, and the respect of all.

Until he died.

Look to the left and get that free holy jetpack
>Holy Jetpack:Gives Infinite Low Altitude Flight.

File: 5_big.png (9 KB, 1200x606)

9 KB PNG

>>8502
Fortunately, that trauma is in the distant past.

Your QUEST is to AVENGE THE DEATH OF YOUR FATHER.

>>8515
recall that you murdered your father in a fit of rage because he left all of his riches to the dog.

>>8515
Who is the vile villain whose vicious victory over your valiant vader gives you vindication for vigilantism?

>>8515
Look for a big ass sword.

File: 6_big.png (13 KB, 720x858)

13 KB PNG

>>8536

That's a... that's a good question, actually.

You suspect that it was someone with a knife, and you've already made a note of this suspicion in your JOURNAL.

>>8566
DESTROY ALL KNIVES

DON'T LET ANYONE ELSE'S FATHER BE STABBED

>>8566
Go search for an individual with knifes

>>8566
Search for this mysterious knife-man. Arm yourself with your father's murder weapon so that you can give him a right good stabbering once he's found. Perhaps some of your neighbors will be willing to aid you in your quest?

Just a question OP, and possibly the most important one: Do we actually own land and property, or are we more of a wandering mercenary with some money to fling around?

>>8601

>>8337

>>8272
>>8576
Search For A blacksmith, To get a jetpack.

>>8566
Fine, take the murder knife to a local blacksmith. Maybe he could tell us something special about it.

File: 8_big.png (36 KB, 918x1917)

36 KB PNG

>>8586

You decide the best option will be to enlist the aid of your NEIGHBORS, if you ever hope to avenge the death of your FATHER.

You are now OUTSIDE.

>>8660
Read road signs. Who lives nearby who you know, and are preferably on amiable terms with?

>>8660
Read them signs

>>8660
Pull the sign out of the ground to use as a weapon.

File: 9.png (11 KB, 750x789)

11 KB PNG

>>8678
>>8683

The signs point the way to the largest towns in the region: DURRAIN, FOSS, and JEREMY.

>>8715
Head to FOSS

>>8715
Go to JEREMY

Head over to Jeremy!

>>8715
>Not naming it DENNIS
Head to FOSS. Attempt to met up with friends and colleagues, if you have any.

>>8715
JEREMY sounds good.

>>8715
JEREMY

>>8715
JEREMY, questman

File: KTnfQcq.gif (718 KB, 480x320)

718 KB GIF

>>8715
Take the secret path to Duane

>>8758
I'd like to see Duane, we should head there next

File: 10_big.png (28 KB, 918x1470)

28 KB PNG

>>8727
>>8731
>>8734
>>8739
>>8753

You set out on the road to JEREMY.

But only make it about a half-mile before a DIRTY PEASANT begins to accost you.

He's saying something about a CARAVAN ATTACK or something. He's not very good with words.

>>8809
Who attacked the caravan?

>>8809
Ignore. Continue heading to JEREMY immediately

>>8809
Knock out the Peasant, salvage what I can, continue toward JEREMY.

>>8809
Take his coat.

>>8809
Acquire a map of local region.

ask him for his arms,he'll understand
>It's for the quest.

>>8864
>>8809
this
can't have peasants with mroe arms than us

File: 11_big.png (16 KB, 501x1200)

16 KB PNG

>>8819
>>8826
>>8832

You slap the SHIT out of the DIRTY PEASANT. This is why you were awarded most likely to succeed at knight school. Because you slapped everyone who disagreed with you.

You acquire the peasant's DIRTY COAT.

>>8864

You've already got arms, numbnuts!

>>8955
We should still take his arms, they could be useful.

>>8955
Four arms are better than two.

>>8955
>>8963 has a point. Four arms would make us extremely powerful, and if we take his legs we won't need a horse.

>>8955
Kill everyone on your path using the old peasant clothes

>>8985
>>8955
The more arms the merrier, dubsman

>>8955
Take the peasant's unconscious body with you, perhaps you can sell him for a fine price to a wizard seeking to perform depraved sexual experiments on just such a human subject

File: 12_big.png (13 KB, 1200x630)

13 KB PNG

>>8963
>>8979
>>8985
>>9023

You are now FULLY ARMED.

>>9043
Put them on your back to protect against backstabbers like the one that got your father.

>>9043
Now go forward to JEREMY.

>>9043
Slay the Dragon already.

>>9056
I second this, we must be able to handle matters that occur behind us. We must find a surgeon to attach our backwards arms.

File: 13_big.png (6 KB, 255x600)

6 KB PNG

>>9056
>>9089

Using the DIRTY COAT, you attach the PEASANT ARMS to your back.

>>9132
go to JEREMY

>>9132
FORWARD TO JEREMY

Perform JAZZ HANDS

>>9132
keep going to town, and keep a lookout for any backroads or alleys to DUANE

>>9132
Search for the closest dragon.

>>9172
that sounds like a awesome special attack

File: 14_big.png (16 KB, 1200x720)

16 KB PNG

>>9156
>>9171
>>9057

After a journey of a few more miles, you arrive in the respectable town of JEREMY. From here, you can see the local TAVERN. A BLACKSMITH is further down the road.

>>9175
Search For a place to test your Quad arms. Then search for Duane

>>9200
To the TAVERN

>>9200
Enter the TAVERN

>>9200
knock the fuck out of jeremy's door
then use knightly charm to enlist him on the quest

Piss on tavern window

>>9200
ask the BLACKSMITH if he knows of any dragons near by.

>>9200
Order some food at the TAVERN. Dine and dash.

>>9200
Go to the TAVERN and ask if anyone knows where DUANE is

>>9200
Go to the tavern and order a cake donut. You can pick pockets with ease with your new arms.

File: 15_big.png (45 KB, 720x1440)

45 KB PNG

>>9205
>>9212
>>9230
>>9249

You enter the TAVERN. It is fitted with the standard TAVERN accouterments: a BAR, a BARKEEP, STOOLS, TASTEFUL PORTRAITS OF PUPPIES.

>>9312
Get a drink

>>9312
imbibe, and casually mention you know about DUANE
slip him the peasant clothes as a bribe

Put BARKEEP in INVENTORY

>>9312
Ask the barkeep for a Cake Donut
Pay him with a show of juggling stools with your new arm skills

>>9312
Ask the barkeep for a free weapon
if he declines, beat him to death with your new arms and take the shotgun behind the counter.

>>9312
Show your appreciation for the PUPPIES by petting them with all four arms.

File: 16_big.png (23 KB, 720x630)

23 KB PNG

>>9342

This is good.

>>9312
Take a seat on the STOOL and attempt to trade with the BARKEEP for one of his PORTRAITS OF PUPPIES

>>9363
Take TASTEFUL PORTRAITS OF PUPPIES

Take a stool. They Are free today. With a purchase of a cake donut

>>9363
Clip through a stool to make it yours

File: 18_big.png (2 KB, 114x264)

2 KB PNG

>>9373

You're not sure about that.

File: 17_big.png (34 KB, 900x690)

34 KB PNG

>>9316
>>9367

You take a seat on the BAR STOOL. You ask the BARKEEP if the PORTRAITS are for sale.

You remember you have nothing to trade.

>>9436
During awkward silence, briefly confuse STOOL legs with your own legs.

>>9436
That's not true. You could give an arm and a leg. then trade the other excess arm for another leg. All in all I think you can consider that a net gain.

>>9436
BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF HIM WITH ARMS

THAT'S WHY WE GOT THEM

>>9436
Fondle your arms as you look into his eyes, maybe he'll give you a free drink

>>9436
try to grab one of the drinks behind him with your peasants arms

SLAP the quarrelsome BARKEEP

>>9454
Give him a double helping of fist pie, he must be an imposter

>>9454
>>9472
These

File: 20_big.png (26 KB, 786x1200)

26 KB PNG

>>9454
>>9472
>>9478

Oh.

>>9526
Good, good.
Now kiss him on the cheek.

>>9526
Apologize. it was just a prank bro

>>9526
I'm getting suspicious. Is this guy even a real BARKEEP? Did he say "What'll it be, friend?" when you walked through the door?

Assert your dominance by taking his wallet and arms. Then kick him out.
>For the Quest.

>>8272
>suicide is always an option for the knight

File: images.jpg (7 KB, 300x168)

7 KB JPG

>>9594
Yeah, the wrong option. We can't just end "toknight"

File: Pun.jpg (6 KB, 225x225)

6 KB JPG

>>9615
>Perfect.

Use INTIMIDATE on BARKEEP

File: 21.gif (20 KB, 213x588)

20 KB GIF

>>9697

You try to INTIMIDATE the BARKEEP.

File: 22_big.png (24 KB, 786x864)

24 KB PNG

>>9799

Oh.

goodnight

Farm goblins for years. Become rich.

>>9843
I hope we continue this

File: 23.gif (47 KB, 720x600)

47 KB GIF

>>9843

You are SOMEWHERE DARK.

>>12011
Take that fucking blindfold off your face

EXAMINE surroundings then steal the light bulb to use as a bludgeon since you have no weapon

>>12011
Flail with all four arms

Try to smell the surroundings.

>>12011
Feel around for a lightswitch

File: 25_big.png (25 KB, 720x2400)

25 KB PNG

>>12040
>>12055

You take off your BLINDFOLD.

SOMEWHERE DARK is mostly empty, except for a DOOR and VENT on the far side of the room.

You take the LIGHTBULB. SOMEWHERE DARK is now SOMEWHERE VERY DARK.

>>12147
Go through the vent just like Gordon Freeman would.

The door you're in looks like it's locked from the inside. Unlock that shit.

If it's too dark to see what you're doing, put the light bulb back I guess.

Knock on the door. Be polite. Look for your arms.

>>12176
*the door to the room you're in

File: 26_big.png (17 KB, 720x1191)

17 KB PNG

>>12176
>>12185

You return the BULB.

The DOOR is, in fact, locked from your side, and you unlock it. But, as an exceedingly polite and well respected knight, you knock before entering.

"hello?"

>>12255
Before leaving, take the bulb again. Might need it to find arms

File: 27_big.png (14 KB, 1920x720)

14 KB PNG

>>12255

You are now SOMEWHERE DECENTLY LIT. Down the hall you can see a CHAIR, a DOOR, and a SIGN.

>>12318
Read SIGN

File: 28_big.png (2 KB, 310x156)

2 KB PNG

>>12350

Informative.

>>12372
Take a dump on the CHAIR

File: 29_big.png (15 KB, 1920x720)

15 KB PNG

>>12411

>>12433
now take the CHAIR

>>12433
Investigate side door before locating the EXIT.

>>12433
Arm yourself with the shit CHAIR, open the DOOR a little and take a peek inside

Break GLASS

File: 30.gif (30 KB, 720x801)

30 KB GIF

>>12441

I don't think it's going to fit.

>>12499
Break the chair apart, so you can use the shit board as small shield, and the leg as an aggressive weapon.

Forget the chair. Put the shit in your pocket and get the heck out of there!

File: 31.gif (25 KB, 519x720)

25 KB GIF

>>12511

You have equipped CHAIR LEG and SEAT SHIELD.

>>12576
oh
didn't expected for it to fall down
>>12573 as this dude said, take the shit inside your pocket/inventory and get moving

>>12576
Exit the corridor

>>12576
point the exit sign to the door you just came through

File: 32.png (5 KB, 600x240)

5 KB PNG

>>12598
>>12689

>>12753
Exit and try to find more arms

>>12753
Check out the weird paintings on the wall that are coincidentally the same as our inventory

File: 33.gif (13 KB, 220x414)

13 KB GIF

>>12948

The DOOR ON RIGHT is locked.

The DOOR ON LEFT is CONFUSING.

>>13542
Sit the fuck down and wait for someone to open the locked door. You'll just end up cutting your own arms off if you get confused.

>>13542
Attempt to sex the void

>>13542
Into the void we go

File: 34.gif (16 KB, 220x414)

16 KB GIF

>>13569
You sit by the DOOR ON RIGHT for a while. It makes you feel a little better, at least.

>>13585

I'm not sure about this.

>>13724
INTO THE VOID!

>>13724
ONWARDS TO VICTORY

>>13724
Jump headfirst into it. What's the worst that could happen, and we don't have many other options here.

Never delve into a hyper-dimensional space without first observing the effects on matter traversing into that space. Throw the poop in to see what happens to it

File: 35.gif (41 KB, 440x214)

41 KB GIF

>>13893

You chuck the POOP.

>>14034
Looks safe, now put down the visor to shield against the poop as we go in.

>>14034
Put one foot in the door (heh)

>>14034
USE THE CHAIR

>>8272
i troll the local taverns for some puss
"hey baby i'm a knight"

File: 36.gif (56 KB, 440x428)

56 KB GIF

>>14073
>>14133

You are now tumbling through the VOID.

>>14354
avoid poop on the way through

>>14354
Holy shit, we're so fucking cool

>>14354
>>14432
make some cool action movie noises while we go through so the intradimensional beings know were one bad motherfucker

File: 37.gif (23 KB, 440x221)

23 KB GIF

>>14398
>>14432
>>14551

You stop tumbling.

>>14698
get hit on the top of the head by poop
you are being followed by the black knight who was also confused and threw poop

>>14698
pop a squat of victory on that door-platform

File: 38.png (6 KB, 440x221)

6 KB PNG

>>14732

>>14901
progress through door. We need to begin transdimensional exterminatus post-haste

Break DOOR with FOOT

Break FOOT with DOOR

Break VOID with PENIS

File: 39.png (5 KB, 161x648)

5 KB PNG

>>14961
>>14965

Two birds, one stone.

Put OTHER FOOT through DOOR

Put BODY through HOLE. break OTHER LIMBS

Put POOP SPLATTER through DOOR

This board is my favorite board right now
and
Put OTHER FOOT through DOOR

File: 40.png (5 KB, 240x420)

5 KB PNG

>>15057
>>15145

You are now the TECHNOLOGY GOBLIN.

>>15402
Open the door.

Create HELL PORTAL with TECHNO-WIZARDRY

>>15402
ask for hellp

>>15402
cast silicaga

File: 41.png (4 KB, 361x205)

4 KB PNG

>>15412

You would if you could. Unfortunately, all you have in your EQUIPAGE is your REMOTE CONTROL and a spare TUNING FORK.

>>15464
Use the fork on one of the legs.

>>15464
WIGGLE your TOES at the TECHNOLOGY GOBLIN

>>15464
tickle the feet with the tuning fork

>>15464
sing a song to the goblin

>>15475
WAIT AUGH iÈM STUPID
>>15477
this

>>15464
macgyver a tuning fork by combining a remote contol and a tuning fork

File: 42.png (3 KB, 240x204)

3 KB PNG

>>15471

It produces a MIDDLE C and a muffled grunt from the other side of the DOOR.

>>15464
Tickle the toes

>>15493
Attempt to recreate In the Hall of the Mountain King by striking other parts of the leg.

switch shoes with the feet

>>15493
Hit the foot with the remote control

>>15493

steal boots

>>15493
take boots off and lick his feet

>>15493
Press the button with the remote controll

>>15559
this

File: 43.png (6 KB, 286x448)

6 KB PNG

>>15531

This doesn't seem to do much.

>>15411

The TECHNOVOID looks the same as ever.

>>15574

also goodnight. I'll be back in the morning.

>>15582
night night

>>15582
good night

>>15582
goodnight, this was pretty hilarious.

>>15582
you're really a cool dude
good night

>>15582
Night cool dude

>>15582
Sleep well

>>15582
GODDAMMIT YOU ALWAYS LEAVE RIGHT AFTER I WAKE UP FUCK

>>15574
Help KNIGHT out of the door.
>>15582
goodnight cool dude

>>15574
COMFORT the KNIGHT

File: 44.png (7 KB, 286x436)

7 KB PNG

>>18584

You try comforting him with some RELAXING MUSIC. Unfortunately, you can only play a C.

The MUSIC is SUBSTANDARD.

>>16299

He seems fairly stuck.

Use TUNING FORK on DOOR

Remove KNIGHT from DOOR

>>19651
Start PRESSING BUTTONS on the REMOTE CONTROL.

>>19651
Attempt to SPEAK to KNIGHT.

File: 45.gif (10 KB, 240x240)

10 KB GIF

>>19755

You would activate the device, but your REMOTE CONTROL is out of BATTERIES.

Hit HELMET with TUNING FORK

>>19933
Attempt to SPOON the KNIGHT

File: tegaki.png (5 KB, 400x400)

5 KB PNG

>>19933
Inquire to the KNIGHT what he's up to

File: 46.png (4 KB, 187x221)

4 KB PNG

>>19942

You strike the HELMET with your TUNING FORK.

The BEHELMED STRANGER says, "Ow."

>>20035
Go to the right to see if you can find anything

>>20035
Scold the stranger for damaging your door.

>>20035
Check the KNIGHT for ITEMS

Use TUNING FORK on DOOR PANEL

GET YE FLASK

File: 47.png (7 KB, 770x310)

7 KB PNG

>>20039

Everything looks pretty normal over here.

>>20372
Check storage to see what's in there.

>>20372
check storage to see if you can find some kind of instruction manual for the big doohicky in the middle

>>20372
Release the other technology goblins from the storage room.

File: 48.png (5 KB, 406x209)

5 KB PNG

>>20374
>>20383
>>20394

The STORAGE is as sparsely stocked as ever. You can see a CROWBAR. Out of reach is a BOTTLE OF FAMILY-SIZED SUPERGLU™ and above that an old SUPERCOMPUTER MODULE.

>>20515
Take crowbar and acquire the glue with it.

>>20515
Sit on the lower shelf and look cute

>>20515
Combine glu and crowbar with module

>>20515
>>20526

File: 49.gif (19 KB, 406x209)

19 KB GIF

>>20526
>>20654

>>20676
Break hinges off the door with the crowbar, glue the door horizontally to the right wall, and create a platform to climb up to the supercomputer.

>>20676
Go back to KNIGHT

File: Behind the door.png (6 KB, 406x209)

6 KB PNG

>>20676
What's behind the door though?

>>20676
Pry the door that the knight is stuck in off its hinges with the crowbar

>>20776
Check it already

File: tegaki.png (1 KB, 400x400)

1 KB PNG

>>20776
fake

>>20676
>>20779

>>20801
Just speculating. Not trying to be OP. It could be the legs of that shelf, or it could be something more, like a shelf monster whose body is comprised of parts of the shelf.

>>20816
Oh, I got confused for a moment there. Honestly I think it's just the shelf.

File: 50.png (5 KB, 406x209)

5 KB PNG

>>20776

It's the SHELF.

>>21026
Climb up to the module and pry it open with the crowbar

>>21026
Damn

Well time to >>20779

>>21026
Carefully climb shelf and examine module.

>>21051
>>21065
T H I S

>>21026
>>21065
>>21087

>>21026
Go back and help the knight with the crowbar

Climb shelf first, it seems. After that, help knight with crowbar.

File: o6Nok6c.png (3 KB, 142x228)

3 KB PNG

How do we know that's not a sideways Mechazawa?

>>21300
We could still try to pry it open

>>21300
That's obviously not Mechazawa. Mechazawa is just an ordinary high-school student.

>>21391
I'm pretty sure that's just a triple decker bed man. Mechazawa's just passed out in the nude.

File: 51.gif (20 KB, 406x209)

20 KB GIF

>>21051
>>21065

It's a little out of your reach.

>>22747
Knock the shelf over to get it down

>>22747
Try reaching at it with the crowbar

>>22747
Throw crowbar at module

>>22747
See if the guy stuck in the door can help

Use CROWBAR on DOOR
Get the BEHELMED STRANGER to get the MODULE

File: 52.gif (33 KB, 406x209)

33 KB GIF

>>22792

>>23040
Jump up and grab crowbar.

>>23040
Grab crowbar and pull down module

>>23040
Enlist the aid of the Knight

>>23040
Have a good yell

File: 53.png (5 KB, 406x209)

5 KB PNG

>>23070
>>23129

The CROWBAR is pretty well stuck. The MODULE seems too heavy to pull down, as well.

>>23965
Hang off of it with one hand and swing back and forth like a forbiddon monkeygnome

>>23990
This

>>23990
Yes. This

>>23965

Climb on top of it

>>23965
>>23990
>>23990


...hussie

>>23965
Use your MASSIVE DONG to get another grip on it for extra leverage

File: 54.gif (12 KB, 406x209)

12 KB GIF

>>23990
>>24030
>>24043

Fuk it m8. Just knock the shelf over and pry the crowbar out.

File: 55.png (9 KB, 406x418)

9 KB PNG

>>25078
>>25205

You land, gracefully, as TECHNOGOBLINS alwys do, bringing the CROWBAR with you. The MODULE looks okay, whatever, it's probably fine.

>>25258
Use the crowbar as a summoning wand to conjure up a friend

File: 56.gif (4 KB, 109x136)

4 KB GIF

>>25288

You sense the CROWBAR is not magical.

>>25258

Go check up on the BEHELMETED STRANGER

>>25438
this, also, if he's still stuck, go through his pockets and take anything cool. after that, go through the void he came from.

File: 57.png (26 KB, 442x623)

26 KB PNG

>>25438
>>25600

It seems the STRANGER has moved on.

***

You are now the QUEST KNIGHT.

>>25640
Knock all of the books off of that shelf. Books are for fags and you're a cool knight.

>>25640
Begin to pull down every book

>>25640
Absorb books.

Caress BOOKSHELF sensually

>>25640
tear down the large poster of books

>>25640
Violate books one by one, splooshing on each book with a wicked grin.

>>25640
Look for an obscure picture book, those can be fun to look at.

>>25640


As above, I think the thing to say is
"Fuck up bookshelf."

File: 60.png (59 KB, 444x1220)

59 KB PNG

>>25678
>>25683
>>25893
You start to pull down every BOOK off of the BOOKSHELF. You make GOOD PROGRESS.

>>25707
But as you do so, you wonder about what could be in these BOOKS. In all your years of knight school, were you missing out by avoiding BOOKS? Could a BOOK be a KNIGHT'S FRIEND?

Nah, chuck that shit.

>>26002
Piss on the pile of books. You just woke up earlier without ever going to the bathroom. A knightly urination is in order.

File: 61.png (21 KB, 444x312)

21 KB PNG

>>26035

This may look like a regular PISS, but everything you do is KNIGHTLY.

>>26075
Really start spreading it around, that shelf is asking for it. Any object that exists purely to hold blasphemous texts needs to be purified as well.

>>26075
what's to the right of the bookshelf