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Previous Thread: >>487002
Archive: http://darksquid.org/titmouse/
Twitter: brianraddatz
Chat: http://darksquid.org/chat
>>
>>513779
Deal with the basement rats.

Which is obviously the name of the new group of punk kids in town.
>>
>>513779
Rats? In my basement?
Pick something more vicious.
>>
>>513810
This. these kids clearly a massive problem and we can get a lot of money by solving this problem permanently.
>>
>>513779
Say "Oh rats!" Then begrudgingly accept the quest, and remark about your past as a skilled adventurer.
>>
''I've got a big rat in MY basement, if you know what I mean.''
>>
>>513828
This. Let's sell knives to the rats so Gnatalie earns some XP.
>>
>>513779

I mean, might as well deal with basement rats. We could go with a calmer simpler mission after the whole ordeal with the haunted house, right?
>>
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>>513779
>>513810
>>513823
>>513871
bois...bois. The basement rats are the name of a rock bad that has been wildly searched for their ability to rock and magical stage effects.

Obviously we need a band with peter with a guitar, harmony on vocals, and gnat the keyboard/special effects person.
>>
>>513779
Reject terrible rat based quests, take a spin on the WHEEL OF QUESTS!

A quest slot machine would also work.
>>
>>513779
So Gnat from Spat is about to hunt some rats?
>>
do the basement rats quest. not the rats in my basement quests, the basement rats quest specifically.
if it feels low end, that's fine, it's to get you started. and gnat agreed to come, so let's ease her into the whole questing dealy.
>>
>>513779
Discover that the "Basement rats" quest is in fact a quest from basement rats.
>>
if she really doesn't want to handle basement rats then show the guy your bestiary and explain how your team slayed all those monsters.
>>
>>514326
This
>>
>>514326
Oooh this
unless the rat colonies are skrvkt's
>>
>>513779
Baiting us with that one different title. Pick the top right quest.
>>
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>>515343
Do either Harmony or Gnat have an illumination spell? I feel that would be useful.
>>
>>515343
Stir the rats nest and see what pops out
>>
>>515343
Do we have some food on ourselves? Maybe some bread or fruit. It could help lure the rats out.
>>
>>515343
Explore the basement
>>
>>515343
Send Gnat first, ''supervise'' her from afar.
>>
>>515346
Harmony sounds more experienced.

Did Splat tag along? Maybe he can smell the rats out.
>>
>>515551
This
>>
>>515343
Splat seems like he'd be a natural rat hunter, send him in
>>
>>513779
These will most certainly be dangerous ROUS, but we dont know that! Split up expecting to clear it faster!
>>
>>515343
>>515646
had the same idea right now
>>
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>>516145
Retrieve Splat
>>
>>516145
Oh shit, Splat!

Quickly get Splat out the laundry basket trap while keeping your guard up.
>>
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>>516145
Dang, that basket brings back memories.
>>
>>516145
oh shit the rats have figured out how to use tools and traps!
>>
>>516154
>>516169

Shouldn't Splat be able to escape from the basket, given the size of the holes?

>>516145

Proceed forward, and beware of traps.
>>
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>>516527
HIS CROWN IS THE SOURCE OF HIS INTELLECT!

KNOCK IT OFF HIS HEAD!
>>
>>516527
Steal crown
>>
>>516527
Remove crown. Become new king of rats.
>>
>>516550
This. Then ask him what kind of King doesn't wear a crown.
>>
>>516527
Retrieve crown, then crown Splat.
>>
>>516577
>not crowning a simple dog outside, granting him vast boosts of intelligence

>inadvertently creating comedy dog via legitimate means in this serious quest
>>
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>>516582
>>inadvertently creating comedy dog via legitimate means in this serious quest
>>
>>516527
Wear crown
>>
>>516527
>oh, we were just here to sell you some knives
>proceed to establish human embassy in rat kingdom
>once we get some trust from the rat king, steal the crown and crown Splat
>now we have a rat army
>>
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This rat killing business reminds me of pic related
>>
>>516527
>>516542
>>516550
>>516577
>>516620
ALL HAIL KING SPLAT
>>
>>516527

Begin diplomatic negotiations. Talking is more our strong suit than straight up violence anyways, right? No need to make this harder with fighting.
>>
>>516179
kek
>>
>>516562
this
>>
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>>
>>517344
Steal guard hats.

Stare menacingly.
>>
>>517344
>>517350
This
>>
>>517344
Have Gnatalie use her kinky vines on the ex-king and crown Splat. Offer the ex-king a countship under your generous rule.
>>
>>517350
>>517361
These
>>
>>517344

Pushin for diplomacy, fucking around is fun but we do gotta resolve this problem if we're gonna be able to move on to better quests n' shit.
>>
>>517361
Also, if the king refuses, have Splat eat him and have him be the Count. Ask the rest of the rats if they have any objections,
>>
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>>
>>517669

Listen. The best case scenario is you kill me, and then the adventurers send a more powerful person to deal with you. What do you put your odds against a wizard that shoots snakes from their eyes?

My point: let's cut a deal. You protect this lady's basement from all other pests and intruders, I'll see if she can't provide you with compensation. Be fair to her and I'll be fair to you.
>>
>>517669
Splat has lunch and is the new King of the Rats. Look sternly at the rest of the rats and ask if they have any objections.
>>
>>517669

Better yet, we convince these rats to help us expand their protection services by bringing the other rats in the other basements to heel.
>>
>>517669

Maybe at least be honest with the rats? Say what you were sent there to do and mention that this is really the best conceivable outcome for these rats. None of them have to die.
>>
>>517669
What if the King of Rats actually possessed a rat king amongst his troops
>>
>>517669
Have Retchtile eat their king and see if they're so tough.

The time for negotiations is over, send these rodents into rout.
>>
>>517669
Wait a minute
Our last name is Titmouse, right
We obviously have some connection to these rodents
>>
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>>518232
>Just considering the mouse part in Titmouse

Don't forget the Tit part
>>
>>518204
This, there can be no survivors
>>
>>518204
Don't do this.
>>
>>517669
Offer to help turn his rat kingdom into a rat EMPIRE
>>
>>518393
>>518388
He already has claimed he will bow to nobody. Maybe he can be convinced if we slaughter his guards, but then his people will be resentful. If we only kill him, and illuminate his followers with the truth of his brutal reign and his willingness to let them sacrifice themselves for him, we can sway his people to our favour and use them as a mercenary army against other rats.
>>
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We is kings n shit
>>
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Damn, suddenly I feel like I'm back in 2002.
>>
>>518428
>Not stealing the guardsrat's helmet
Peter is losing his touch
>>
>>518428
>Rats can transfer themselves to the moon as voice over IP.
>Meanwhile humans probably don't even have indoor toilets.
>>
>>518428
That de-escalated quickly.
Let's go to the casino and tell the questmaster Gnatalie is a big girl now for him, then we head for lunch at Jedrik's
>>
>>518428
Give Splat the Crown, he deserves it
>>
>>518446
This, we must have a King Splat
>>
>>518446
Supporting
>>
>>518428
>>518426
Are you gonna add my masterpiece to your fanart page, senpai?
>>
>>518446
Thirding
>>
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>>518871
What a cocksucker. Ignore the very obvious plot point and find a good quest to do.
>>
>>518871
Is that Piper? Find out who the cutie is.
>>
>>518875
Supporting.
>>
>>518871
I want that glove.
>>
>>518871
challenge her to a game of dice

bet our fanciest knife against her glove
>>
>>518875
Thirding. Lets do another quest before jumping into something fishing like that. Also that guy is obviously cheating so gambling against him would be stupid.
>>
>>518871
Hello Piper
>>
>>518875
This.

You cant tell us what to do, Okk!! YOU ARN'T OUR REAL MOM!!!!
>>
>>518883
>>518886
This
>>
>>518938
I would say tha we can't tell Questy what to do, what draw.
The voice we have, the choice we have, is only an ilusion. Okk leads the story exactly as he wants it.
>>
>>518968
Questy's been excited to introduce Piper for a while now. We're obviously going to be railroaded so hard we can't walk the day after.
>>
Have we upgraded our bestiary with Moon Mice?
>weakness: getting their boss eaten
>>
>>518875
agreed, were no cheaters
>>
>>519093
Oh shit I just remembered I already voted ignore this post I sucks cocks
>>
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>>
>>519339
Sure, examine THIS

Then throw the knife at her face.

Cheese it after we kill her.
>>
>>519339
This seems like an obvious setup to take our shit and run without having to gamble. Don't show her it.
besides, if we don't show her the actually fancy knife we can put up our worst knife instead
>>
>>519339
Whip out that Knife we got from some cursed tomb in our life of adventuring, it will coincidentally be some ritual knife she needs for evilness
>>
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>>519346
Oops, forgot to take off my name I used in notapaladin's Civ Thing.
>>
>>519339
Oh hi not-Piper
While we negotiate the terms and conditions and she's busy examining the knife, bag her gauntlet and leg it
inb4 we earn ourselves a nemesis
>>
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>>519339
>>
>>519339
>>519347
whip out our dick
"fanciest knife"
"most prized possesion"
"mind if i "examine" it..."

Dicks out for harumbe baby!
>>
>>519339
Examine this!
*unzips dick*
>>
>>519364
>>519399
gr8 minds think alike
>>
>>519364
>>519399

>Implying that isn't her plan

You're falling right for the blade = dick meme

She's a semen demon, look at that getup. Show her the knife so she doesn't eat our soul via blowjob
>>
>>519408
>Show her the knife so she doesn't eat our soul via blowjob
Is there a problem with this?
>>
>>519413
We'll be basically casting a dry spell on Harmony if we lose our soul
>>
>>519413
We'll miss out on a Harmony-Gnatalie-Splat fourway if we're deaded
>>
>>519339
We could take out a knife with the mighty Mouse King Helm shoved onto the hilt where the pommel is.
>>
Can we show a shitty knife while we steal her gauntlet and replace it with a shitty piece a wood ?
>>
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>>519634
Gnatalie is gonna be real mad.
Let's go to Jedrik's already.
>>
>>519634
Hit on that cutie blonde
>>
>>519641
That would get Gnatalie even madder.
>>
>>519634
Oh.
Whoops.
Whatever, I'm sure she wasn't important to the plot at all. Back to what we were doing.
>>
>>519641
This.
>>
>>519640
Supporting
>>
>>519640
If Harmony and Gnatalie ask, we were just trying to relieve her of her gauntlet so she doesn't trick innocent fools out of their money
>>
>>519634
TELL HER TO WAIT UP AND YELL "DICKS OUT FOR HARUMBABY!"

*translation tell that bitch to move on and avoid this plot questline*
>>
>>519634
Tell the dealer Red was using magic to rig the game and go back to the quest board.
>>
You're the best, Questy.
>>
>>519937
For more than a decade now, you have been my dearest friend, Anonymous. Thank you for always being there for me.
>>
>>519634
now while her back is turned, steal her gauntlet with your skills.
>>
>>519953
Woah we're good.

But not obvious plot point robbing good.
>>
>>519634

Steal her glove. Then, report her to the casino's staff.
>>
>>519634
Touch her butt
>>
>>519949
You work hard on comics to give people lulz, and you actually made it it. What did you expected, Questy?
>>
>>519961
She seems like a pro. It might be easier to report her first and then have the staff confiscate the glove, so we can more easily steal it from the staff.
>>
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>>520183
By fire be purged!
>>
>>520183
Girl if you want me to not fuck around, mark me as your man already.

Gimme a hicky.

Cover me in your lipstick.

Give me Ode de Gnat.

Because you ain't suckin' but you throwing shade.
>>
>>520183
Screw the plot, go shopping for some fancy new adventuring gear!
>>
>>520198
Jedrik is a blacksmith, he can make gear
>>
>>520183
the only obvious answer is to follow.
Also, if you happen to go past jedricks house, say you're chasing a giant spider woman
>>
>>520183
Let's go to Jedrik's and see if we can buy ourselves a fine weapon. All things considered our days as a thief are waning, so we should consider a reclass so we can take on more dangerous quests.

We should look for a good sword (and reclass to swordsman/ronin) or an arquebus (reclass to arquebusier). Either way, ask about training for the new equipment after the purchase.
>>
>>520183
Ignore it. Questy, you're not going to make us follow this obvious questline.
>>
>>520183
Follow her

>All these fags ignoring the plot for shit and giggles
>>
>>520183
Do a 360 and walk away.
>>
>>520187
PURE

POETRY
>>
>>520258
But you all followed the Basement Rats quest because of the different title. We've always been sheep.
>>
>>520183
Ok, time to go meet our buddy
>>
Jedrick Time
>>
>>520183
Maybe we could try following her for a bit, she seems up to start trouble anytime. Maximum stealth, of course.
>>
>>520183

See if it is a living thing, if so make note of it in your beastiary. Also add those magic moon rats too the beastiary if you haven't already.
>>
>>520351
Like a smooth criminal
>>
>>520666
>>520183

This
>>
Bumping before auto sage
>>
>>520183
Destroy the wall marked with the red X
>>
>>521560
>"WHY THE FUCK DID YOU BLOW UP MY HOUSE"
>>
>>520183
DID SOMEONE SAY THIRD GIRL?
>>
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>>521649
"good thing none of you have any hats, otherwise i would be tempted to steal them." ;)

introduce your companions.
>>
Casualy say:
>"hey guys! Nice to meet you all!
*to girl
>"I knew your dad way back when..."
*turn to Jedrick*
>"btw there's a red-haired psycho-cheat whose jacking up the city, lets avoid this plotpoint and get wasted"
>>
>>521652
Maybe that's why they don't have hats
>>
>>521649
Make a thief pun involving the penny form of currency.

Oh and introductions too, with more clever puns to show his family that Jedrik has witty friends.
>>
>>521649
finally got to BLACK a girl, huh Jedrik?
>>
>>521666
i dont get this pun at all
>>
>>521664
>"well a PENNY isn't worth stealing, so COUNT yourself lucky"

then wiggle your eyebrows like a fucking catapilar on LSD
>>
>>521672
If they mention the eyebrows say they are your pride and joy
>>
>>521649
Ask him about the Red lady. If he's local, he might know something about her or at least the magic chair and glove.
>>
>>521649

Congratulate our friend on his marriage. Compliment his wife. Give his kid a hat (or two). The rat king's crown would look awesome on a doll.

>"btw there's a red-haired psycho cheat whose jacking up the city. Let's avoid the plot point and get wasted."
> She shows up at the next bar.
>>
>>521706
>Give his kid a hat (or two). The rat king's crown would look awesome on a doll.
Oh god this, so much this. The dean's hat would do a swell pijama cap, but I fear Gnatalie already has dibs on that one.
Do we still have the mansion top hat? It would be a great start for a magician costume for her.
>>
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>>521649
Do a coin trick and pull a nickel and dime from behind Penny's ear. Then go "wait that's not right", then pull out a penny from behind Jehdrik's instead.

A penny for Penny, lest our audience be nickel and dime'd.

Enjoy a casual conversation then get on to business: we need a weapon and training.
>>
>>521649

Pull a coin out from behind the kids ear, jokingly accuse child of being a thief.
>>
>>521671
The joke is that a man of African desent is having sexual relations with a white woman
>>
>>521649
Introduce our companions and ask about the family.
Ask if he knows anything about a red-haired girl with a magic gauntlet on a giant spiderchair when his family isn't listening.
>>
>>521649
Piper when?
>>
>>521649
God damn how many leg days did Jedrik skip like shit this nigga a straight up gorilla.
>>
>>521649
Penny must die. For plot purposes.
>>
>>521758
This
>>
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>>522310
Now for a coin trick!
>>
>>522310
"Weird. Saw one walking around. Looked intimidating, so didn't want to exactly walk up and say hi right away. But, all in due time. I'm glad to see one of us doing rather well, really."

Talk WHILE doing the coin trick.
>>
>>522310
Poor Splat :(
>>522333
this
>>
>>522310
Ask Jedrik if he wants to come along with us. If he says no, let's make it a family trip.
>>
>>522310

Do a coin trick to break the ice a bit, then catch up on old times.
>>
>>522310
Also, don't forget to upgrade our gear and get some supplies.
>>
>>522451
Don't do that
>>
>>522451
Nope, we already have enough party members
>>
>>522697
We could use a tank
>>
>>522700
So find one that isn't happily retired
>>
>>522757
Come on, we're just gonna track a cheating spiderchairgirl, it's not as if we're gonna crack down a demonic cult or are we?
>>
>>522794
Do the coin trick first. Penny looks tense.

Then we track the girl, with Jedrik, without the girls.
I may or may not have a huge fetish for sidecuts.
I told you to wait for third girl before making harsh decisions.
>>
>>523643
Where were you five pages ago?
>>
>>522310
MEANWHILE IN THE LEGION OF CHAD...
>>
>>524120
YES we must become the CHAD for at least one or two updates.
>>
>>524142
THIS
is a good idea.
I wanna see this mana shit
>>
>>523643
I don't, I'd rather not have her be a regular part of the quest.
>>
Maybe those moon rats can help?
>>
>>523822
Away from the Internets...
I'll go back to mostly lurking until I have more time and an actual connection.
>>
>>525496
Agreed
>>
>>522310
Time to steal some upgraded equipment around town for Tim, and to find new books for Gnat.
she need to learn new spells.
>>
>>528364
Make Tim the main character, he deserves it.
>>
OP, where art þou?
>>
Dead thread?
>>
>>534281
Dead OP
>>
OP, WHERE ART THOU?
>>
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>race-mixing
>>
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>>545758

>Current Year
>Being racist
>>
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>>545812
>2016
>not being racist
Get out of here John Oliver



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