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>>58159093

Now, it wasn't like little miss traitor-pants was always hanging on Bane's arm, in fact she left him to his own devices fairly frequently (which we felt disproved Ivana's assertion that she was "compromised" too). We weren't exactly sure what she was doing during these absences, probably plotting treason or enacting dark rituals (which Bane would find boring), or maybe she was off "negotiating" with various powerful male figures who'd respond poorly to her boy-toy's presence. In any case, whenever Angelica went off on her own, she always dropped Bane off at a certain up-hive club (which we dubbed his Daycare), along with at least one of her doubles and a few other helpers, who presumably were just there to call her whenever he got bored and wandered off. So far she'd always arrived on the scene and sidetracked him before he managed to overloaded a hive's fusion reactor or something, but it was probably only a matter of time.

The point is, that before we could neutralize Bane, we'd need to arrange for Angelica to be distracted too. The problem was that there were only a very limited number of things that would get her attention, five of them to be specific if Scisitat's little briefing on his stupid artifacts was to be believed...

This might've been the point where we started to go a just little off the rails. Well, at least according to our defense counsel.
>>
You're late, but that's okay.
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>>58177335

I mean, it wasn't like we set out intending to steal the artifact. It was just that, of the the five, Angelica and Bane already had two (the Crime Lord's and another they'd gotten earlier), then there was the one we'd blown up (ON ORDERS), and finally one Ivana said her team had retrieved, which meant Sciscitat had it now. This just one left spooky artifact out in the wild, and we didn't much like our chances of getting to it before the people who were, you know, actually trained for that stuff.

We did look into other options, such as Twitch's perfectly reasonable idea of mining all routes out of the upper hive and just waiting until Angelica found the last artifact herself. The problem was that even though the number of routes between hives was limited by the massive rock-storm (it stops being sand or dust once it's bigger than a grape), there couldn't possibly mine ALL of them. Well, actually we probably could, we were beyond well stocked at this point, but you can't just leave massive piles of explosives lying around on pieces of crucial hive infrastructure... someone might steal them. Anyway, if she found an artifact on her own, she'd probably bring Bane with her, which was exactly what we were trying to avoid here.

We also toyed with the idea of just creating a fake artifact, which we could be sent some place Bane wasn't welcome, such as that Merchant Cartel. One of the reports Doc had gotten had a few pictures of the last artifact (another spooky box thing), and Tink was fairly certain he could rig up a close enough duplicate out of cardboard or something. Even better, since there wouldn't be any actual artifact stuff inside, we could just pack box itself full of explosives. Both Sarge and Doc vetoed this idea on the grounds that it involved the words "fairly", "close enough", and "cardboard". Also, she was a psyker and would presumably be able to tell the difference between an ancient eldritch artifact and a forgery, regardless of quality.
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>>58177335
OH BOY OH BOY A LIVE ONE, haven't seen one of these since Tyranid Acquisition Experts
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>>58177346
Oooh, pretyped and proofed?
That'd make up for my carpal from spamming F5 for the past half hour.
>>
Heh, thinking about it, I probably could've been editing a chapter while I waited instead of giving myself a cramp.
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>>58177338
>Gets free entertainment
>Bitches
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>>58177376
>>58177398
> mfw I checked every half hour and got here before these plebs
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I've caught another one live!

Was hanging with my buddy last night, and he offhandedly asked if there'd been a new one, since he hadn't checked in a while.

And emperor be praised there was. And because he is a just lord, there is even more today!
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I always catch them live when I have shit to do.
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What are the chances that the Artifact is something that the party has already came across from before?
I think you guys know what I'm talking about.
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>>58177408
Eh, I was sort of rooting for a faster show up time from yesterday.

>>58177412
Joke is on you, they're all me.
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hey Shoggy thanks for making these threads. They're some of the best /tg/ content of all time
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>>58177435
Oh, I had completely forgotten about that.
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>>58177346

Ivana even put forward a whole nother option for bait: Inquisition agents, specifically us. After all, she reasoned, if Angelica hated us so much, she was sure to come down to personally tear our limbs from our bodies and crush our skulls with her bare… hands. At least, that's what Ivana would do. We (very, very cautiously) explained that while this was an excellent idea, and everyone appreciated her suggestion, A: we'd been bait before, and hadn't much liked it B: No, she wouldn't come anywhere for us. She might send Bane, or have an orbital strike called in, or send the entirety of the Secret Police, but we highly doubted she'd show up in person. Even to gloat. At least not until we were all good and dead. Now, if it was Sciscitat on the other hand, or maybe one of his favorite minions… well, that was something worth thinking about. Or it would've been, if we weren't TOTALLY ABOVE THAT SORT OF THING.

So we really did our due diligence on this, but we just that we HAD to get an Artifact of our own, and of the four still existing we only knew where one of them was. It was, inevitably, Nubby who raised the question of if, you know just hypothetically, Sciscitat REALLY needed his. After all, if Angelica and Bane were dead, wouldn't that practically solve his whole scavenger-hunt problem for him? It would be for the Greater Good, as the Tau weirdos would say.
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>>58177481
I thing a decent portion of Inquisitors would agree to the plan.
But it's Sissy.
No way he'd be on board, as it'd be difficult for him to fit 30 steps into a simple bait op.
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>>58177435
I've legit forgotten
>>
fucking necrons...
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>>58177335
Holy shit I caught it live.
>>
>>58177481

The saner members of the squad watched in increasing alarm as first Twitch, then Tink and Ivana chimed in to add their support, and began planning was quite possibly the most harebrained heist in Inquisitorial history. When they got to the part with the clown masks and the giant wooden badger, Sarge finally put his foot down. He stated, in no uncertain terms, their heist was the exact sort of stupidity we'd been fighting with since we'd been "volunteered" for Inquisitorial service, and that wasn't even touching on the fact that we didn't actually know if the artifact was still in the other team's base, or how shaky our plan for baiting out Angelica was; we were not even remotely qualified for this sort of thing.

Fortunately, we knew a few people who WERE. Admittedly they were the exact same people we were planning on stealing the artifact from, but that just put them in a uniquely good position to get it for us. All we had to do was convince one or two Sciscitat's minions to sell him out, and according to Ivana, there was one specific person who was uniquely primed to do just that: his Interrogator. Sure, she seemed to be the man's most loyal follower, and probably hated our guts even more than he did, but if what Ivana said about her being "compromised" was true…

At first we hadn't put much stake in Ivana's whole "compromised" thing, but then the other team's surgeon asked Doc for a consultation on the Ganger, who'd been kept in medical confinement ever since her encounter with Bane. It hadn't been pretty: the trash-talking, mohawk-sporting, gun-nut who'd reminded us so much of Aimy had been reduced to something like a strung-out Obscura junkie, except somehow so much worse. Every conversation with her inexorably turned to Him, had Doc seen Him, did Doc know anything about Him, had Doc MET Him? When Doc had come back, he had a quiet word with the rest of us about taking Ivana more seriously, which we did (not that he much liked the end result).
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>>58177572
>A mechanical murder dog for ants
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>>58177572

Mind you, even if Ivana was right and the Interrogator was just as brain damaged as the Ganger (only a lot better at hiding it), that didn't mean she would go steal us an artifact just because we asked nicely. We needed to phrase our request just right, make it clear that all we wanted the Artifact for was to kill Angelica, you know, the Evil Manipulative Sorceress controlling poor impressionable Bane Johns. We certainly didn't have any desire to try and kill HIM (we were a bunch of cowards after all). Hell, with someone more, um, Interrogator-like guiding him, he might just be willing to come back to Inquisitorial service! That would never happen if Scisitat got his way though, all he cared about was his Artifacts, once he got them he'd just run off again, leaving Bane under Angelica and the Conspiracy's control...

Yeah, the real problem was't so much the phrasing as keeping a straight face, especially since it would be Doc doing the delivery. Which is why, instead of making his pitch to the Interrogator directly, he went and visited the one person even more "compromised" than she supposedly was. Doc wasn't very happy with his role in Operation Exploit The Mentally Traumatized For Strategic Gain, but he grudgingly made one last trip to the other team's base. With the equally grudging help of their Surgeon, our medic had the most obviously staged conversation in the history of espionage in front of the Ganger, who briefly "escaped" during the Interrogator's next visit to their base. The fact that this all somehow WORKED was mind boggling.

A few after Doc's visit we received a calligraphed note informing us a "distraction" would be drawing the Sorceress' personal attention to Jack Hive. Day after tomorrow.
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>>58177644
Even ants need a best friend who'll kill for them.
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>>58177644
Oops
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>>>/qst/
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>>58177653
>A few after Doc's visit we received a calligraphed note informing us a "distraction" would be drawing the Sorceress' personal attention to Jack Hive. Day after tomorrow.
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>>58177653
this is some heavy cognitohazard bullshit I gottta say.
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>>58177653
Well, that went... surprisingly smoothly. Which of course means the inevitable cocking up will be all the worse.
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>>58177717
All the better, lad.
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>>58177687
GTFO
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>>58177687
> being this new
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>>58177653

Two days of frantic scrambling later, Sarge and Ivana were in position on a maintenance walkway overlooking Interchange 7JU-4, trying to look as bored and PDF-like as possible, and hoping their heavy weapons weren't visible from the lanes below. Across the way, Doc was leaned against an inappropriately camo-netted lascannon, desperately trying to ignore Nubby's dissertation on the inherent deviousness of all women. Above both groups, perched on the network of pipes clinging to the underside of the junction's 16-lane northbound overpass, Twitch sat with his pile of detonators, watching the incoming traffic like an especially jumpy hawk, and periodically rechecking the distance markers he'd placed along the roadside. Thirty kilometers away (some of them vertical), Tink double-checked his comm connection to the "auxiliaries", watched his chrono tick down to 0, and stepped into Seven Hive's most famous club. He then sheepishly stepped back out, and proceeded around to the service entrance before the bouncer tore his head off.

At T plus fifteen minutes, Tink had changed into his disguise, delivered his package, and was in position in the discrete spot the bribed paparazzi had told him about. At twenty, one of the lookouts Nubby had hired ("onrably 'tired PDF vet'rans, evry one of 'em") reported a flier with a Planetary Government IFF transponder landing, and a man with a "real fancy lady" exiting. Tink switched his dataslate over the appropriate feed, and immediately recognized Bane and Angelica, and switched to visual as they entered the club proper and proceeded to their usual spot. He watched them careful as they settled in and ordered drinks, patiently waiting for the moment when Angelica would quietly slip away. Then he kept waiting.
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>>58177653
Their tactics truly are too subtle for the Conspiracy to comprehend.....
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It continues... all hail Shoggy...
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>>58177687
Dude, please don't troll in /tg/,
reference global rule 3.
Also newfag.
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>>58177830
AND HERE WE GO
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>>58177830
So... when does the Dakka begin?
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I so should be sleeping between now and work... but it's story time! Damnit, Shoggy!
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>>58177836
Who would expect that a bunch of dipshit Grunts, plus their giant deranged bodyguard, would not only be able to gather better intel than the sooper speshal Inquisition Team, but would also set them up as bait so that they could try and kill one of the most impossible to kill people in existence? It’s too ridiculous to plan for.
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>>58177830
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>>58177830

Over an hour and three false alarms later, Sarge commed Tink to check what was taking so long. The techie in turn called his increasingly annoyed observers to check for the ninth time whether any vehicles with the appropriate "fast lane" tags had left the garages. He got a combination of drunken slurring, hacking coughs, mutters about shrimp, and quacking, which equated to a firm "no". Except from the landing pad team, who angrily (not to mention drunkenly) told him they hadn't seen anyone AT ALL since the flier that dropped Bane off, the one with the hot pilot, had left to park somewhere else. Tink briefly considered the merits of mass hobo murder, possibly followed by suicide, especially when his "observers" explained that no, they hadn't watched where it went, they'd been diligently keeping their IFF readers pointed at the pad and waiting for Tink's word that the target was leaving. After a few deep calming breaths, he called Sarge back to let him know there might be a problem. Sarge did not take it well.

In the face catastrophic mission failure and an enraged noncom's inexorable wrath, Tink did what came naturally: loudly complaining about how it wasn't his fault. He was the ONLY one of us who hadn't been on the whole Angelica mission, he'd only seen her the one time at the Crime Lord's place, how was he supposed to tell if it was her or a double? And anyway, it was NUBBY who hired a bunch of random drunken bums to be our spotters. None of it was Tink's fault, his part of the plan was actually working just fine, Bane had already gone through three bottles of the exceedingly fancy stimulant-infused liquor Tink'd delivered, and he was ready to put his distraction into play at a moment's notice. In fact he could do it right now, with or without the double there, because HIS plan's ALWAYS worked. Sarge just screamed at him to do absolutely nothing without further orders, and then cut the comm.
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>>58177830
LETS GO
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lets celebrate
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>>58177948

In the pained silence that followed, Doc quietly told Sarge it was probably time to call Scisitat and tell him what was happening. He could actually hear the noncom's teeth grinding from from the far side of the interchange, but didn't get a response. Rather than argue, the medic just sighed, dialed his long-range comm to the Surgeon's number himself, and asked her forward him up the line. He'd gotten as far as the Torso-priest (who's immediate response was to ask what we'd fucked up), before Sarge finally manned up and grudgingly took over the call.

Now, Sarge had been embarrassed before, in fact since joining the Inquisition he'd been "the most embarrassed he'd ever been in his entire life" on several occasions. It didn't seem possible, surely there was some upper limit where you'd actually literally die of it, but somehow he kept managing to reach new heights. His conversation with Sciscitat, admitting we'd lost the Sorceress, who was probably halfway to Jack Hive to pick up "an" Artifact, maybe just possibly from the Cartel's subspire, was one of those moments. (He did at least manage to remember the old Diplomacy Adept's advice about admitting things, but it was a bit of a moot point, since the Inquisitor's first words were "It was YOU!")

Actually, skipping over the abuse, mockery, and general Angry Inquisitor Noises, Sciscitat took it surprisingly well. He eventually confirmed Angelica's arrival in Jack Hive via the governmental vactrain and her acquisition of the Artifact, and agreed to track her for us. He even grudgingly admitted that we'd chosen the best spot for our ambush, which was vaguely worrying given we'd never told him that. He instructed us to hold position and refrain from contacting him again, he'd let us know when Angelica was on her way back, and would provide tracking information once she was in our hive, but in the meantime he had far, far more important things to do. Sarge accepted this as gracefully as he could manage.
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>>58177948
Do it motherfucker. DO IT
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>>58177948
And now Sarge knows the joys of running a mission with his team.
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>>58177948
Hah! It's Foul Ole Ron and crew!
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>>58177948
>Plan hasn’t even begin and it’s already fucked
That is not a good sign when trying to assassinate a man with the Luck of Gladstone Gander
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>>58177955
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>>58178030
>He even grudgingly admitted that we'd chosen the best spot for our ambush, which was vaguely worrying given we'd never told him that
panic
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>>58177335
Shoggy!
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>>58178030

Despite Sciscitat's assurance he'd warn us in time, the wait was absolutely nerve-wracking. Tink had the worst of it, sitting across from an increasingly drunk Bane and the Angelica look-alike. He was on the verge of activating the distraction himself, whatever Sarge said, when the 30-minute warning finally came through. The techie breathed a sigh of relief as he finally got the word Go, re-donned his white coat and cheap wig, and did one last check to make sure he had the right address for the Arbite's Precinct Fortress.

Bane Johns, Interplanetary Man of Mystery, Lovable Rogue, and All Around Badass had been having an okay night all things considered. Sure, Inquisitor Girlfriend had ditched on their date, and the arm-candy was being especially fussy tonight, but the new drink they were serving was absolutely amazing. He was definitely getting bored though, and the chick was starting to really harsh his groove. Maybe it was time for a nice walk, he always found something interesting to do when he went for a walk. Inquisitor Girlfriend would nag him afterwards, but she never stayed mad, she understood a man as awesome as him had Needs.

Bane was about to ditch when what's-her-name got all bothered about something and left on her own, he didn't worry about it, chicks did that sometimes when he was bored of them. He was on his way to the windows (doors were so passe) when a little old guy with a briefcase in one hand and a huge bottle of that new drink in the other walked up to him. He thought the guy looked a bit familiar, but he stopped worrying when the geezer pressed the bottle into his hand and opened up the case. Bane eyes lit up as he took in the impressive array of gadgets, beautiful pair of autoguns, and reconnaissance photos featuring a sinister-looking building and a nicely filled out young woman.

>"The Planetary Governor's hot daughter has been kidnapped by ninjas. Are you a bad enough dude to save the Planetary Governor's hot daughter?"
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>>58178156
>"The Planetary Governor's hot daughter has been kidnapped by ninjas. Are you a bad enough dude to save the Planetary Governor's hot daughter?"
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>>58178156
My sides are now up there with the Tesla.
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>>58178156
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>>58178156
Holy shit this is amazing.
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>>58177948
How is this a catastrophic mission failure? No one's shooting at them so I'd call it a minor mission failure.
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>>58178156
By the God Emperor...

hahahahahaha HAHAHAHAHAHA (dies)
>>
>>58178156
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>>58178305
>No one's shooting at them
YET...
>>
>>58178156

Sarge grinned with relief as his PDF-issue scanner picked up the first confused chatter on Arbites' bands. He reminded Tink to return as soon as he was sure Bane didn't need any more combead prodding, and turned his full attention to the ambush. According to Scicitat, now that Angelica had her prize she was travelling in a six-vehicle semi-armored Secret Police convoy. Not that the armor would do much good against the literal crates of high explosives that'd been crammed under the interchange. Admittedly there was going to be a bit of collateral damage, but this was Inquisitorial business; the civvie body count would be positively miniscule compared to, say, an Exterminatus. The noncom was doing a final weapons check with Ivana (not that they'd really be needed once the explosives had done their bit), when he received the final awaited from Sciscitat.

What Sarge, and the rest of us, were expecting was a last minute update on which of the reserved lanes under us Angelica would be taking. What we GOT was a slightly-breathless warning from the Inquisitor that the convoy had started turning towards Underhive, possibly to take the Artifact to some secret warehouse instead of the Secret Police HQ, Bane's nightclub, or even the Arbite Precinct, like we'd planned for. She'd still be passing through the interchange, just on a completely different, and far lower, section than the one we'd set our ambush on… Sarge didn't even stop to swear, there wasn't time and he didn't know any words vile enough for the current SNAFU anyway, he just grabbed as many Krak launchers as he could carry and started sprinting along the walkway. Ivana shrugged and jogged after him, carrying their heavy bolter one handed and humming to herself.
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>>58178156
Fucking. Genius.

I wish I could have seen the GM's face when you explained your plan to him!
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>>58178432
annnd here we go
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>>58178432
Quick! Someone start a chase theme!
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>>58178432
>carrying their heavy bolter one handed and humming to herself
perfection
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>>58178486
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MK6TXMsvgQg
I think it's the best one for the AGP
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>>58178305
Ok, NOW it's a potential Catastrophic Mission Failure.
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>>58178486
Here you go!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZnHmskwqCCQ

Not many inquisitorial missions could use THIS as legitimate background music, but this is AGP: Where sanity goes to die.
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>>58178499
You beautiful bastard.
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Can someone remind me why Doc makes Snitch the psyker go green at the gills?
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>>58178156
WORDS CANNOT DESCRIBE THE JOY THIS PLAN BRINGS ME HOLY SHIT
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>>58178432
> shit fucks up
of course
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>>58178534
I think it's because every moment he's not working on someone he's thinking lovey-dovey shit about his Hospitaller GF.
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>>58178432
They just sent Bane into the place where all the Untouchables are being held, didn't they?
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>>58178560
Porn based psychic interference field. Got it. Ta.
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>>58178534
Snitch got hit with a perils of the warp that basilly makes him loose his lunch whenever Doc is around.
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>>58178570
Maybe. More importantly Bane's busy on a "Secret Mission" and unable to help his girlfriend.
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>>58178499
>>58178517
Now all you need are sounds of lasgun fire, furious swears, panicked screams and the sounds of a van crashing into/through things and it’s perfect.
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>>58178589
Oh. Was that in the first or second 'stealth' mission? I'm short on time, so a dedicated trawl is out of the question right now. Just catching up while I'm at work as things update.
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>>58178589
Ah, right.
I like my explanation better though.
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>>58178534
>>58178560
I thought it was because Doc has the Tranqs.
And the tranqs mess snitch right up.
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>>58178432

On the far side of the interchange from Sarge and Ivana, Doc hastily plotted a slightly longer route down to the new ambush point, and dragged Nubby away from the lascannon before the trooper could voice any complaints about how much it'd cost. Twitch watched them go from his perch above the interchange, spent a few seconds debating whether it'd be worth setting off his charges anyway (just in case some stray debris knocked out the lower section), and regretfully ditched his neatly arranged rows of detonators. As the demolitions trooper attached his rappel gear, he warned the rest of us that he was going to be a little late to the party. Doc suggested he meet up with Tink, who was racing back towards us on a PDF messenger bike, simultaneously trying to dodge slower traffic, direct Bane to the Marshal's office, and take off his Quartermaster Agent disguise. Tink tried to reply, but it just came out as inarticulate cursing.

Sarge skidded into position just in time to see the convoy's lead vehicle round the corner, he signaled Ivana to keep moving and get a better firing position while he started prepping his three Kraks for rapid fire. A distant corner of his mind registered a voice on his combead instructing him to call off the ambush so Angelica could be tracked to her Artifact warehouse, he instructed the voice to go have relations with several varieties of farm animals, sighted his first Krak on the middle of the section, and started counting down. Farther along the walkway, Ivana found a security door marked "stairwell" and casually kicked it off his hinges. One of the startled maintenance workers inside informed her that she couldn't do that, realized he was very obviously wrong about that and stepped aside, his partner didn't and regretted that decision for the rest of his life. Ivana reached the level above the roadway a few seconds after the maintenance worker, but unlike him, she stopped there and exited right as Sarge's countdown hit zero.
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>catching shoggy's thread live
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>>58178589

Well, all Doctors as it turns out. It's skipped over here, but we had the surgeon waylay him while the Ganger was "escaped"
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>>58178619
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>>58178598
The one where they got back from the sewer crawl I think.
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>>58178619
I'm getting blue balls waiting for shit to pop off
pic unrelated
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>>58178700
Same.
Pic also unrelated.
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>>58178592
http://www.youtubemultiplier.com/5a9375d642c5b-the-all-guardsmen-party.php
I tried
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>>58178700
>>58178731
This is the pain of being caught up with media. But whereas tv shows have weekly dates and books take long enough that you can safely forget about them until a new one pops up on your recommended reads list, THIS format of storytelling is exactly random and fast enough to give you eternal impatience.
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>>58178763
fucking amazing thank you
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>>58178763
11/10
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>>58178763
Glorious! This is the official WiP AGP theme song! Could use slightly louder lasguns and some heavy ordinance, and maybe a more dedicated swearing soundtrack.
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>>58178763

help anons im laughing to death
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I love you faggots
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>>58178815

Well "you are intellectually retarded" is clearly Sciscitat over the comms.
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>>58178619

The first Krak missile was right on target, it punched through the "armored" glass of the lead car's windshield like wet paper, reducing the vehicle and its occupants to flaming wreckage before they even registered the attack. The second car, driving slightly farther back and left in the other reserved governmental lane, spun out as it tried to evade and cartwheeled a good fifty meters before it came to a stop. None of its occupants got out before Sarge's second Krak hit its exposed undercarriage.

The rest of the cars in the convoy, including the more-heavily armored limo in its center, reacted professionally enough, but they were in a remarkably shit tactical situation. There were obvious advantages to taking the governmental fast lanes, with their secured entry points and the chest-high barrier separating them from the common rabble clogging the rest of the highway, but the disadvantage was being pretty much trapped in a two lane killbox. The only smart move available was to try and bust through the wreck of the first cars and keep moving, but three more Kraks (Sarge's last one, and two from where Doc and Nubby had just come out on the wall above them), were enough to completely block the way. With a massive pileup of other governmental vehicles already blocking way behind, the Secret Police took the only option left to them, and started getting out to return fire.
>>
>>58178499
>>58178517
Great minds think alike
>>
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>>58178763
ten outta ten
>>
>>58178856
Oof.
Poor suckers.

Y'know, unless the secret police recruited Kriegsman.
>>
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>>58178856
well that went alright
>>
>>58178763
threw some more shit up there

http://www.youtubemultiplier.com/5a9378480c9f4-all-guardsmen-party-revised.php
>>
>>58178499
>>58178517
Truly, great minds think alike.
>>
>>58178915
Shoggy what are your thoughts on having this auto play on the archive site?
>>
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>>58178856
Killzones... bad news for them.
>>
>>58178856

From her slightly elevated position and across the highway from the convoy, Ivana opened up on the disembarking Secret Police with her heavy bolter, greatly increasingly the panic level in the eight lanes between them. Above her, Sarge cursed himself for not bringing any more Kraks or his nade launcher, and started trading las-fire with the well-covered men below. He didn't land many hits, but between him and Ivana they had the entire convoy nice and distracted for Doc and Nubby's follow-up attack.

After a short debate over targets, Doc and Nubby decided it'd be best to stick to the objective, and two Krak missiles slammed directly into the roof of the still-unopened limo in the middle of the convoy. Admittedly it was a bit overkill given they were firing anti-tank ordinance, but the two guardsmen felt it was best to play things safe. You can imagine how surprised and disappointed they were when the smoke cleared to reveal a burned, battered, but still intact limo, now glowing with a faint pinkish-purple light. Lacking any better ideas, Doc and Nubby started tossing grenades as fast as they could grab them, hoping for a lucky hit with a Krak nade or something, but only managed a few glancing hits before return fire from the Secret Police fire forced them back into cover.

It was at this point that the fight began to stall. As well as our opener had gone, we'd blown all our hole cards. There were still at least ten Secret Police agents still standing and their armored cars made damn good cover, even from grenades. We had them pinned, but time was on their side and they knew it, we only had so long before reinforcements started pouring in and we'd be in all sorts of shit. Nubby suggested a run back for more Kraks, and Doc wanted to wait for Twitch and Tink, but Sarge vetoed and gave the order to advance. It really said something about the situation that nobody objected.
>>
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>>58177335
>caught it live again

aww yiss
>>
>>58178915
>>58178841

The moment "...You are physically repulsive. intellectullaly retard..." echoed over the screams, explosions, saxaphone, screaming acusing profanity, and gunfire- I knew that I had glimpsed a moment of Sarge's life.

Also possibly the afterlife. I was laughing pretty hard, anons.
>>
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>>58178992
> advancing on hunkered down opponents with good cover after losing element of surprise, through traffic on open road
>>
>>58178992
This is the Guard if you don't know what to do fix bayonets and close the distance.
>>
This is the Guard son, if you aren't fucked you aren't engaged yet!
>>
>>58178915
If I were a femanon, I'd find you and have your babies.
>>
>>58178992
Pinkish-purple light?
Yup, Slanneshi shit goin' on in the limo.
>>
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>>58179077
If you were that easy to impress, you would probably already be pregnant.
>>
>>58178992
Alright. NOW we're looking at a catastrophic mission failure! But there's always hope...
>>
>>58179117
using the artifact as a dildo in ritual
>>
>>58179132
Too bad they capped that Eldar chick.
>>
>>58179120
Nah, they don't hit catastrophic levels until the Chaos Dreadnought squeezes out of the limo like it was a clown car.
>>
>>58179147
Knowing Slaaneshi cultists, that's a distinct possibility.
>>
The Space Marine scout's ghost this entire time.

And then realising he's happy about something the crew are up to.
>>
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Pulling an all nighter for school. This shoggy thread couldn't come at a better time.
Sidenote: If anyone has any tips on writing an annotated bibliography please throw me a bone
>>
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>>58178992

As Sarge dropped began pushing through eight lanes of semi-stalled traffic, and Nubby and Doc left their nice safe drainage pipe to take turns sprinting down the exterior stairs, Tink finally reached the interchange. The techie cut off his call to Bane with a final hammed-up death-gurgle and directions to avenge him, and tried to figure out just where the hell in the giant concrete rat's nest the fight was.

Tink's attempts to get directions from his distracted teammates were interrupted by someone dialing his combead directly and screaming "STOP THIS TRUCK" in his ear. Tink looked around in confusion, eliciting more more yelling, before he finally spotted a tanker wallowing through traffic next to him with a small figure jumping up and down on top of it. Tink took in the size of the tank, the bright red FLAMMABLE on its side, and the detpacks in Twitch's hands. The techie briefly tried to remember how many crates of explosives they'd packed in the bridge he was currently riding on, before giving up and weaving through traffic towards the tanker with a shout of "Ohhh shit Twitch, you're gonna get us all killed."

The surviving agents of Task Force Spectre, handpicked by the Inquisitor to act as her last line of defense, let out a ragged cheer as the attackers suddenly began pulling back. Their cheers were cut short by a massive crunching sound above them, and they looked up nearly eight levels to the overpass above them and the truck hanging over its edge. All nine agents watched, too stunned to even notice a chunk of debris that flattening their commander, as the it teetered on the lip for a second before finally tipping and dropping directly towards them. The limo's occupant, unsure what was happening, peaked out the door for a second, before slamming it shut and pouring every ounce of her newfound powers into her shield.

The tanker was about ten meters off the ground when the detpacks on its side detonated it in a massive, oddly wet-sounding FWOOP.
>>
>>58178992
How does it feel, Shoggy, knowing your writing is more entertaining than 90% of anything ever written? Going to feel a lot emptier when it's all over knowing there's no new AGP to look forward to even if it's a long way away.
>>
>>58179286
use a generator site for the citation formats.
>>
>>58179286
I was supposed to write a bunch of those for the last writing class I took. I just didn't. Professor still gave me a B-.
>>
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>>58179292
Did Twitch immediately pass out from blood loss after the size of the explosion as it all went straight to his groin?
>>
>>58179286
Wulf is that you?
>>
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>>58179292
>>
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>>58179292
>>
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>>58179292
>that image

>Inquisitor bitchtits gets a twitchified MOAB dropped on her head
>>
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>>58179339
Wulfgar?
>>
>>58179292
The bitch probably survived but at least it's just her now.
>>
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>>58179292
> "no shit LLC"
>>
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>>58179292
It wouldn't be a AGP plan if something didn't go up in a massive fireball. Cheers, Twitch, you beautiful mad bastard!
>>
>>58179292

>mfw
>>
>>58179306
Bless you

>>58179308

If it wasn't worth 24% I'd
>>
>>58179292
Oh no, is Bane back?
>>
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>>58179292
YEEEEESSSSSSS
>>
>>58179403
Last night's thread
http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/58159093/
>>
>>58179415
I meant with the tanker exploding a fair bit above the road.
>>
>>58179403
>>58159093
>>
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>>58179292
>>
>>58179425
Naa Twitch just wanted the airburst.
>>
>>58179425
well, when a bing bang goes boom, the whooshieboosh goes wham blam at a far greater reach than the initial bing bang.
>>
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>>58179403
>>
>>58179403
UUUU
>>
>>58179403
He's a big guy
>>
>>58179448
That's a rather technical description, could you try rephrasing it in layman's terms?
>>
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>>58179449
>>
got damn this is good
>>
>>58179486
In fluid dynamics, a blast wave is the increased pressure and flow resulting from the deposition of a large amount of energy in a small, very localised volume. The flow field can be approximated as a lead shock wave, followed by a 'self-similar' subsonic flow field. In simpler terms, a blast wave is an area of pressure expanding supersonically outward from an explosive core. It has a leading shock front of compressed gases. The blast wave is followed by a blast wind of negative pressure, which sucks items back in towards the center. The blast wave is harmful especially when one is very close to the center or at a location of constructive interference. High explosives, which detonate, generate blast waves.
>>
>>58179486
When you airburst an explosive, the concussion wave will bounce off of the ground thereby magnifying the intensity of the blast.
>>
>>58179486
Think a half sphere and most of a sphere.

Half sphere is if twitch waited for it to hit the ground before detonating it.
Less room for boom to do boom things.

Most of a sphere, more room for boom to boom.
>>
>>58179292
Help I don't think my boner should be this big
>>
>>58179292
Holy shit.
>>
>>58179503
>>58179509
Much easier to understand! Many thanks, I didn't get the theoretical training, just a little hands-on practice with CLC's.
>>
>>58179570
No problem, sometimes the whangabangs and poofwhooshes out there need to be explained in concise manner.
>>
>>58179570
>just a little hands-on practice with CLC's
Man, the Canadian Labour Congress sure has changed since my days
>>
Hi Ma, I'm catching it live!
>>
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I feel so very honored to finally be a part of an all guardsman party thread
>plz post faster Shoggy. I gave up 4chan for Lent, but Sunday's don't count. I only have an hour left before the day ends
>>
A live Shoggy is the best!
>>
>>58179601
God understands, anon. God understands.
>>
>>58179292
OKAY! What did Twitch roll to procure a freaking promethium truck? It must have been amazing!
>>
>>58179593
Their personalities have become a lot more volatile...
>>
>>58179332
I don't think Twitch is that kind of demolitions expert. Throughout the series he's always been paranoid, but outside of panic attacks he's always treated explosives with a modicum of care and expertise. Think less "Junkrat from Overwatch" and more "Vinney from Atlantis" or maybe "Wille from Jormungand". Except when he has panic attacks. That's different.
>>
>>58179689
Not entirely true. Remember back in "Bad Educators", where its revealed that he raised his bed so he could fit a melta-bomb under it?
>>
>>58179332
Doubt it, the man has carried and detonated a backpack nuke. Turning a tanker truck into a fuel air bomb, while impressive, pales in comparison to past detonations.
>>
>>58179689
Twitch reminds me a lot of Lieutenant Pibald from Schlock Mercenary. Completely fucking deranged, but dangerously competent with explosives and his paranoia turns out to be correct an alarming amount of the time.
>>
I can't wait for the AGP to inevitably kidnap the planetary govenor's daughter.
>>
>>58177335
https://voiceofrob.deviantart.com/art/Scraping-the-bottom-of-the-barrel-part-1-728147348

Hell if you want a guardsman read, this isn't bad
Its a 3 parter

Penal legion story
>>
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>>58179292
>>
>>58179292
>>
>>58179751
AGP > everything
>>
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Emprah bless your mad heart, twitch.
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>>58179292

The explosion was big, just not as big as we'd expected, which was honestly a good thing given how close to it some of us were. Instead of the massive fireball and concussive shock we'd expected, what we got a flaming spray like the world's largest incendiary grenade, covering the entire highway in burning… fuel. The smell was, well, familiar.

Up on the overpass, Tink turned to the man next to him, who was looking over the edge with the rapt expression of someone who'd always wanted to that. He read, then re-read the word's "No Shit Services: For All Your Septic Needs" on the man's coveralls, then looked at Twitch, who shrugged and muttered about it being the best he could find; Tink shook his head. Both guardsmen hooked their drop harnesses to the railing and rappelled down into the quite literal flaming shit-show below. The septic worker saluted them.

Sarge was the first to arrive at the smoking epicenter of the explosion, but the rest of us weren't far behind. As we arrived we heard a faint melodious voice cursing and screaming somewhere inside the flames and smoke, then a blast of lightning knocked Sarge off his feet. The singed noncom spared a second to thank the Emperor for carapace armor, and rolled into cover while the rest of us sprayed fire into the smoke, somewhere inside Angelica screamed something eldritch sounding and daemonic figures started rising out of the muck. At least we thought they were daemonic, it was hard to say, because we just kept shooting, taking them out before they could finish forming. I mean, we'd seen this trick what? Fifty times now? A hundred? Angelica and her bullshit might've been intimidating back in the early days, but after spending a few months with the Daemonthrope, well…
>>
>>58179897
The AGP are basically the make-a-wish foundation. For adults. Who would never, ever actually admit to the wish.
>>
>>58179897
>No Shit Services: For All Your Septic Needs
Shoggy, you owe me a new pair of sides
>>
>>58179897
>A fucking septic truck
Beautiful
>>
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>>58179897
Shame they don't have a certain Deathwatch trio here to back them up for the final showdown this time though.
>>
>>58179942
>deathwatch for ants.jpg
>>
>>58179942
It's also a shame they didn't score themselves an Eldar waifu when they had the chance. Oh well...
>>
>>58179897
>Angelica and her bullshit
I see what you did there!
>>
>>58179897
>>
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>>58179897
>No Shit Services
>For All Your Septic Needs
my sides are in orbit, put me in the screen cap.
>>
>>58179897
>The smell was, well, familiar.

the smell of victory
>>
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>>58179948
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>>58179968
Pffft. You got me, anon.
>>
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>>58179897
>mfw I called the truck being a septic tank
>pic unrelated
>>
>>58179949

begone, heretic thot!
lest you taste the sororita's shot!
>>
>>58179897
Ah, I love the smell of methane in the morning! Smells like...angry bitch!
>>
>>58178958
Am I prophetic or something?
>>
>>58179897
Makes a change for them to be dropping it on someone else, instead of being dropped in it by their bosses!
>>
>>58180062
Nah, The Emprah just decided to reward you for your loyalty
>>
>>58180019
B-but... think of all the shenanigans they could have with trying to hide her and Fio! Fumbles needs a friend, and they could get her addicted to Tau cartoons!
>>
>>58179897
>The septic worker saluted them.

This line absolutely made my year for some reason, Emprah-speed you crazy damn heroes
>>
>>58180091
HERESY!

*BLAM*
>>
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>>58180019
well, space elves are kinda hot and stuff
>>
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>>58180171
>>
>>58179994
not better anon.
>>
>>58180171

CONTROL YOUR LIBIDO
LEST I SUMMONTHE ORDOS XENO
>>
>>58180019
I'd taste her shot if you know what I mean.
>>
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>>58180171
>>
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>>58180198
>>
>>58180284
>>58180198
>Where will you be when the acid kicks in?
>>
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>>58180257
>>
>>58180341
HNNNNNGHHHHHHHHHHH
>>
>>58180171
https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=23&v=IEGo41443iI
>>
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How does it take Shoggy so long to post?
>>
>>58180372
I was debating posting that
>>
>>58180399
This is why I always have a giggle at those bright-eyed "OMG FINALLY CAUGHT ONE LIVE" guys. Being here live is just painful, the only good part is interacting with shoggy.
>>
>I've been awake for 32 hours.
>In 8 I need be back at work.
>I really should be asleep.
>I can't bring myself to turn the computer off until I know if The Bitch meets her end or not.
>>
>>58180399
Its called orgasm denial. You should try it.
>>
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>>58180399
quality can't be rushed
>>
>>58180399
To watch the shitposting, probably contribute without namefagging, and proofread the next part.
>>
>>58180399
It can take up to 40 minutes, he's proofreading, doing some last minute editing and looking for good pics to go with the posts. But for quality, we shall wait patiently.
>>
>>58180341

L-LEAVE AT ONCE XENO TEMPTER
MY HEART BELONGS TO THE EMPEROR
>>
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>>58180436
>Contribute without namefagging
Sempai noticed me!
>>
>>58180399
Either a) he's proof reading and image searching, or b) the Emperor has forsaken us and misfortune has befallen him or his internet.
>>
>>58180420
You have a problem.

So do I.
>>
>>58180419
The best part is that he has a website and schedules his updates - you never have to "catch" it because you should always know when it is.
>>
>>58180463
Ye.
It's cute.
>>
>>58180478
All catching one live has done is make me sad. Now I know this is the second last chapter, the campaign has been concluded for a year and he played Nubby. Ignorance truly is bliss.
>>
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Reading the highway ambush while listening to Yakety Sax is honestly the best entertainment I've had in weeks.
>>
>>58180553
ehh, its not so bad. You always knew he was in the campaign. All campaigns end eventually.
>>
more AGP i am happy, just happy

also got more twitch explosion so gotta contain that destructo boner
>>
>>58180583
For all I knew he was the DM, but that hasn't really honestly made me sad. If anything I just respect him more for playing a great character. I hoped it would last longer though, I was under the impression until last night the campaign was ongoing and all I had to worry about was when it ended in the far future it wouldn't be a "people lost interest" situation.
>>
are we there yet?
>>
>>58180664
yes
>>
The next post will be.. Shoggy!
>>
>>58180689
Shoggy
>>
>>58179897

As we mowed down the whatevers-they-weres (NOT shit-daemons, whatever Tink said), Twitch and Sarge began tossing short-fuse frags into the cloud until we were finally rewarded with a pained yelp and a filth-splattered figure zipped out of the smoke. Once again Sarge was hit in the chest, except this time by two amazingly-aimed bolt-pistol rounds, knocking the burly noncom back a good two meters, and pretty much destroying what was left of his chest armor. He was still capable of swearing though, so Doc declared him stable, and joined the rest of us firing at the sprinting figure.

Angelica was moving at a fair clip, but her shield seemed to be failing and between four lasguns and Ivana's bolter we managed to tag her at least twice. She still managed to reach the maintenance door she was aiming for though, slicing through it with that sword of hers and rolling through the gap into the tunnel beyond. We followed at a more leisurely pace and felt a nice warm tingly sensation as she discovered it was a supply closet. It was quite possibly the most beautiful cursing we'd ever heard, in multiple ways.

As all of us (except for Sarge who was still trying to remember how his legs worked) fanned out around the door, Angelica stopped cursing. In an impressively haughty voice given the circumstances, she announced that she had the Liber Demonica with her, and we'd never be able to kill her without destroying it. She informed us it was a stalemate, and instructed us to go get our Inquisitor so she could make a deal with im. Doc shrugged, looked over his shoulder and asked Sarge if he cared about any Liber Whatsits. The Acting Inquisitor told him where he could shove any stupid artifacts, and Doc passed that information on. Along with an entire bouquet of incendiary grenades courtesy of Twitch.
>>
>>58180696
Thanks, lad.
Almost looked like an ass.
>>
>>58180696

YOU IDIOT
>>
>>58180689
so close, dude
>>
>>58180553
I've been dealing with this feel all my life.
>>
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>>58180696
>>58180723
>>
>>58180701
MHMMM, i smell burned Bitch
also possibly demons
>>
>>58180701
Perfect
>>
>>58180701
This is going to turn out badly.

Of course.
>>
>>58180696
I thought you were a hero.
But then his actual post loaded.
I have been betrayed.
>>
>>58180696
you're a god damned hero
>>
>>58180701
It took some time, but I think Sarge is starting to see the ups of the advancing career path he found himself on.
>>
>>58180701
finally someone else has gotten the luck of guardsmen
>>
>>58180701
I cant imagine what would have surprised her more, the fact that the Inquisitor apparently didn't give two shits about her bargaining chip, or the fact the Inquisitor who foiled her plots yet again is none other than the mad Guardsman Sergeant who's around since she was an Interrogator.
>>
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>>58180701
Don't get too hype yet gents, she ain't dead until we see a body.
>>
She has traped herself before so this seems to be that happening again not her luck leaving her and bane has already stolen everyone on the planets luck when he got here
>>
>>58180878
This is 40k. She isn't dead until she's been slain in both realspace and the immaterium, and then had a necron pylon driven through her chest, and even then there's no way to tell if Bane hadn't managed to improbably replace her corpse with a sex doll.
>>
>>58180701
I really don't think trying to blow up any sort of demonic tome can have any result other than 'warpy stuff'
>>
>>58180878
She's in a closet and just got hit in the face with a bundle of duct tape and incendiaries. That sounds like a good start to me at the very least
>>
>>58180701
>Along with an entire bouquet of incendiary grenades courtesy of Twitch.

>no holy water for old time's sake

bit of a missed opportunity there
>>
>>58180909

It's worth a dozen hive cities so long as she dies
>>
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>>58180701
IS IT TIME FOR DAEMONS?
>>
It is always time for demons in the inquisition
>>
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>>58180701

What came back out of the maintenance closet might've been ex-Interrogator Angelica Dominicus, but it sure as shit weren't human. Despite the claws, the tentacles in uncomfortable places, and all the flames, it was still somehow feminine though, and it moved with a familiar lithe grace. The voice though, that was something entirely alien, like a cross between honey and broken glass, accompanied by an invasive pulsing *something*. We stared in shock, as whatever it was pressed inwards trying to worm its way in through our ears, but only for second. Before it'd taken its second step, all six of us, including a slightly unsteady Sarge, opened fire. It got three more steps, but not four.

We only stopped firing when we ran dry, by that point there wasn't much left but a smoldering pulsating lump. While the rest of us reloaded Nubby, in violation of seventeen varieties of common sense, took a few steps forward to inspect the pile. He stopped short as a familiar pained voice called his name, and asked him to save her. The trooper looked down into the somehow-intact face and eyes of ex-Interrogator Angelica, who smiled at him and called him her knight in shining armor. Nubby smiled back, and informed her "it wasn't working out". Twitch offered her another incendiary boquet as consolation.
>>
>When you don't know if /tg/ is dying or no one is posting
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>>58181109
worth the wait, well worth the wait
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>>58181109
FUCK.
YES.
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>>58181109
SATISFACTION
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>>58181109
It was a match made in the warp, never to work out.
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>>58181109
DING DONG, THE BITCH IS DEAD!
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>>58181109
>Twitch offered her another incendiary boquet as consolation.
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>>58181109
Holy shit I thought for a sec Nubby was gonna betray them, guess he really did get over it
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>>58181109
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>>58181109
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>>58180920

He's saving it for later. This is just Act 1 remember.
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>>58181109
So what did she do mechanically speaking?
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>>58181176
Die?
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>>58181176
burn become a demonhost ... thing, burn some more
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>>58181109
>mfw
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>>58181109
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>>58181176
Get shot. Get exploded. Get burned. Do some warpy shit. Get burned again. Die.
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>>58181143
BROS BEFORE HOES
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ah fuck, gotta go work, really looking forward to finishing the read when i am home again
stay classy /tg/ and thank you for sharing this Shoggy
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>>58181168
>This is just Act 1 remember.

ooooooooohhhhhhhshhiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttttt
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>>58181168
>>58181109
IS THAT THE END FOR THIS EVENING?
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>>58181275
Nah man, he lets us know clearly, and usely hangs around and takes questions.
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its closing on 1 am and I wanted to go to sleep at 11 god damnit shoggy why did you go live!
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>>58181109
NUBBY YOU FUCKING HERO
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>>58181275
One more, I promise, but I'm not happy with the stuff after, so I'll have to decide what to do with it.
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>>58181370
papa bless
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>>58181288
Fuuuck, dubsman, I have work tomorrow.
>>58181370
OH FRABJOUS JOY.
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>>58181370
If you just post this last one then I can go to sleep and catch the next one tomorrow please
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>>58181109
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>>58181109
It's the way he mulls it over that makes it.
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>>58177335
Shit i got a live one
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>>58181109
>> The trooper looked down into the somehow-intact face and eyes of ex-Interrogator Angelica, who smiled at him and called him her knight in shining armor. Nubby smiled back, and informed her "it wasn't working out".

Good on you nubs
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>/tg/ and /co/ are both through to the knockouts in an elite and Shoggy is posting
Today is a good day
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if only Harambe were here to see this...
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>>58181465
I don't know what that is, but I'm proud of the board.
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>>58181168
Is it??
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>>58181486
I think it's the board soccer games.
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>>58181508
Ah, right.
I think I watched that one year.
Only reason I ever think about a sports game being interesting.
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>>58181508
Please, the proper term is divegrass
>>
>>58181109

As much as we'd have loved to sit and watch our ex-boss' remains smolder in the hive-light, there wasn't time. The ambush had only taken a short while (only about a dozen or two "rounds" as us professionals call them), but the Secret Police had to have reinforcements on the way, and they probably wouldn't call things off just because their boss was dead. Even more worryingly, the combead Tink had given Bane was completely dead, and we could overhear chatter about SOMETHING leaving the Arbite's HQ at high speed.

It was time to get moving and, if possible, avoid dealing with any freakishly powerful secret agent types until we'd at least had time to patch ourselves up. Sarge, with a bit of support from Ivana, led the way back towards their side of the Interchange, where the faithful cargo truck had been stored. As we moved the noncom put in a courtesy call to Sciscitat to let him know Angelica was dead, but didn't get through, so he had Doc leave it with the Surgeon instead (no mention was made of any spooky Liber things though). We were just entering the stairwell when a high pitched whining sound drew our attention up towards the top of the interchange.

An Arbite Eagle shuttle, pouring smoke from its engines and weaving a tad drunkenly, shot down out of the sky, caromed off two walls, a support pillar, and a truck full of mattresses and a physically improbably manner, and skidded to a halt in the general vicinity of the maintenance closet. From the far side of the traffic, we heard a distance, surprisingly heartfelt-sounding

>NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
>*breath*
>OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

As the pitch rose and got angrier, Sarge instructed the rest of us to move faster.
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>>58181465
https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2018/02/fosta-would-be-disaster-online-communities Watch out for this, though. All burgerfags here need to give this a looksee.
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>>58181540
>Bane crashes a plane
>There will be no survivors
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>>58181540
OH FUCK
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>>58181540
Fuck.
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>>58181540
Goddammit, I thought you said you were going to be done now. Now I have to catch the rest of this tomorrow.
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>>58181580
He said one more.
That was the one more.
You're good, lad.
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>>58181540
PANIC
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>>58181540
Don't Halo 2 me now Shoggy. At least stick around for a bit.
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>>58181540
inb4 it's the Traffic Cop
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>>58181540
Cue the traffic cop.
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>>58181584
Unless it isn't.
Party don't stop till Shoggy drops
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>>58181599
>>58181603
>aromed off two walls, a support pillar, and a truck full of mattresses and a physically improbably manner, and skidded to a halt in the general vicinity of the maintenance closet
It's Bane
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>>58177335
Caught it!!
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So did they just leave the artifact?
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>>58181621
Artifact is presumed destroyed.
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>>58181621
You, um, mean the artifact they just hit with several dozen grenades?
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>>58181621
Almost certain they burnt it with Angelica.
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>>58181621
Sounds to me like artifact got blown back to the warp
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Warpy stuff can be stupid hard to destory though
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>>58181540
Okay that's all I got in me tonight. If you couldn't tell from the pace I pretty much had to rebuild those last few from scratch, and I'm not any happier with the stuff coming up.This really needed another week of polishing, but oh well... (God I miss posting straight greentext)

Sadly I'm not going to have time to post tomorrow, or really on any other weekday, so as dickish as it is to keep splitting things like this, the "thrilling conclusion" is going to have to come next weekend. Almost certainly on Saturday. (Maybe I'll have time to get the post-mission lore-dump in good enough order to post though, god that things a clusterfuck and a half).

I guess I'll be around for another half hour or so if you have questions. Otherwise good night, and thanks for sticking with me guys.
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>>58181652
nooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
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>>58181644
Sure. But it's dependent on its power and original form, and your average book isn't that durable.

Especially when adding a shitload of thermite grenades.
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>>58181652
Always nice to see you back, did lurk in the previous thread, good storytelling as always.

Also I'm betting the traffic Judge will somehow contribute to the death of Bane Johns.
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>>58181652
But fair enough shoggy, was great to finally see the bitch succumb to bullet poisoning
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>>58181658
http://www.nooooooooooooooo.com/
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>>58181652
>post-mission lore-dump
will that be going up on your site as well?
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>>58181658
*breath*
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this literally made me laugh so hard that I got a nose bleed...
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>>58181644
If fire CAN'T destroy chaos artifacts why do all those confessors carry flamers then? Checkmate, xenos.
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>>58181652
See you next weekend you glorious bastard. Take your time to polish the story it's worth the wait.
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>>58181652
Thanks for the story Shoggy, Those last bits had me pumped as fuck
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>>58181652
As always, thanks for posting. It's good to have you back.
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>>58181652
Life from Bane Johns' perspective was interesting, to say the least
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>>58181652
>Sadly I'm not going to have time to post tomorrow, or really on any other weekday
question: besides storytime, do you still stick around here at /tg/?
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>>58181686
Hey Shoggy, at this point it's undeniable you're a pretty great writer. Great enough to captivate the attention of /tg/ for all the years you've been doing this anyway, have you always just naturally had the knack for this or was there some crash course you went through before this?
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>>58179897
>The septic worker saluted them.
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>>58181673
https://youtu.be/pjTZoKj3gEE?t=1m35s
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>>58181681

Yeah, everything goes up there, just on a day or two lag from this. The lore dump is at risk of being classified as an interlude or somethign though, because it's like 10 posts worth of goddamn talking and explaining all the backstory stuff we've been ignoring. It was super interesting at the time, but god it's hard to re-write that shit IC.

>>58181713

Not as much since it got blocked at work. I hang in the storythreads on occasion, and I was actually over in /twg/ a fair bit while I was doing those little Total War AAR things, but I don't do much straight web browsing these days unless I'm stuck at my desk avoiding working. And, y'know, blocked.

>>58181725

Thanks, it means a lot to hear that. The literal entirety of my writing career can be found in the /tg/ archives. I've read a lot of stuff though, so there's that, but the only writing classes I ever took were the stupid gen-ed ones required for college.
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>>58181767
luv u shoggy
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>>58181767
Well regardless of how you ended up here I'm glad for it. There are plenty of books out there that are widely accepted as literary juggernauts and I like them well enough but the AGP stuff is unironically the most downright entertaining I've ever read. Never stop writing stuff you enjoy writing, the only way it could be better is if you got paid for it.
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>>58181652
hey there shoggy, anon who sent some audio reads your way some time ago, they'll resume sometime soon-ish, thanks for your work on these threads
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>>58181652
I've been following along for a few years, and your writing is one of the few things I still look forward to in life. Thank you for writing all of this up. You should keep writing after you finish AGP, it's been a blast.
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>>58181599
the traffic cop is the only force that can kill bane left on the planet
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Actually got to see one live! You are a credit to /tg/ Shoggy!
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>>58181905
This is obviously the perfect counter to Bane's warpfuckery.

In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if the Traffic Cop ALSO has warpfuckery.

Which raises the question: How many of these warpfuckery-inducing lunatics terrorize the Imperium?
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>>58181540
Oh fuck. This. This is very bad. Very bad indeed.

Only one force can save our heroes now - but how long it will take judge traffic cop to arrive on the scene remains to be seen.
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Thread archived at suptg, and I confess to failing my will save while choosing a description.
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>>58181652
Take as long as you need, Shoggy.
Remember that the AGP is in the running for the largest and most consistently high quality OC ever seen on /tg/
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>>58181905
He did just illegally park a flier on the freeway.
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>>58177335
Welcome back Shoggy and thanks for another story time.
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>>58181686
Shoggy reveals himself to be a man of webcomic taste. Even if the early strips had fuck all for art.
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>>58182359
As a suptg fag I thank you.

Thanks for the stories Shoggy.
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>>58182515

Hahahahahahaha there will be no survivors
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>>58178763
>>
>>58180701
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PHQLQ1Rc_Js




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