>>55920632
You die.

you can't accelerate evolution you retard

>>55920632
You get cancer.

There would be no environmental pressures to select for, so nothing. If the machine causes mutations, you'd just accumulate random mutations.

It's not evolution if it's contained to a single individual. It's mutation.

>>55920632

The concept requires way, way, way more definition and explanation of how it actually works.

Does it simulate selection pressure and alter the organism present based on theoretical adaptations to that selection pressure? How does it determine what pressures to apply, and what adaptations are most advantageous?

>>55920658
>There would be no environmental pressures to select for

Every building has it's own distinct evolutionary pressures. I have to imagine machines do too.

>>55920692
What?

>>55920707

If you, your mate, and your descendants were restricted to a particular building, the particulars of that building would shape the path of your evolution.

Being in a rapid evolution machine would kinda be like that, but you'd evolve to be more fit within the context of the machine.

>>55920768
So would the particulars of your mate and the other members of the initial population (you can't populate with just two people). The environment of the building would also include the food and water sources.

>>55920632
Hopefully I die.

>>55920632
http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-914

It depends on the setting.

So, let's just say it's a mutation machine.
Would you use it?

Mutations are often beneficial right?

>>55920632
that's not how evolution works.
it's not a straight line that programmed into your body, you silly

>>55920658
>There would be no environmental pressures to select for
Nigga you're literally getting into a machine.

>you evolve to get better at evolving

>>55920832
Fuck no. You mutate around 500 million times each second, and every one of those mutations have a small chance of giving you cancer.

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>>55920875

Are you saying Star Trek: Voyager's warp 11 episode lied to us?

>>55920897
And your odds of reproducing within the machine alone are 0%, so unless the machine is going to turn you into something that can reproduce asexually, evolution isn't going to happen.

>>55920632
>You step into the accelerated evolution machine
It accelerates evolution by killing the idiot who stepped in the evolution machine, by adding another environmental pressure to the human race.

>>55920930
I think even Voyager's writers were embarrassed by that episode, and that's saying something.

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>>55920632
You would be in the "Super Mario Bros." movie.

>>55920938
>your odds of reproducing within the machine alone are 0%
Nigga you don't know what's in the machine, it could be a portal to another dimension that runs on a different timeframe which has evolutionary pressures beyond your imagination and a bunch of people to reproduce with.

Or preloaded DNA which it splices with yours.

>>55920982
>Nigga you don't know what's in the machine
Then I can't very well answer the question, can I nigga?

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>>55920930
We tend to not talk of "Threshold" lest we want to have to drink brain bleach again.

>>55920938
That's a selective pressure right there.

>>55920954
Best comment

>>55921001
Best just forget about Voyager all together.

>>55921001
Missing in this picture are their children, which were left in the Delta Quadrant to either be rapidly killed by predators or go up to be an invasive species.

>>55920938
>odds of reproducing within the machine

Your odd of reducing WITH the machine are 100%

>>55921066
So the machine can get pregnant now?

>>55920632

Long, sinuous thumbs.
itty bitty little feet.
Chest is a dice tower, belly is a pit five miles deep from which distant rumbling and the sound of strange beasts can be heard.

My teeth are a doorway, My mouth an atrium with cool, dry floor. Past that is the passage to my throat; a vast spiral staircase down to the first layer of my my stomach/dungeon. Here's begins The Gangplanks of the Gullet, where precarious wooden gangplanks have been arranged and strange simian creatures reside, feeding off of scurrying throat-frogs who form burrows in the vast circular flesh walls that surround it.
Below this layer is the realm of a thousand acid rivers and it's community of bogmen, beneath which the bile-realms lie and the secrecy and paranoia of the host of the bile-lords make difficult the gathering of word of what realms lie beyond.

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>>55920632
>>55920875
>>55920683

That said I feel bad about being dry and unimaginative so lets have fun with this

>EVOLUTION MACHINE

1.This device of unknown origin transports any organism placed into it into a pocket dimension, contents of which are fully controlled by the AI of the machine.

2.Once placed, machine creates a vast environment suitable for living. It also constructs a vast number of organisms, of the same species as the object, but with enough genetic variation as to allow healthy breeding.

3.The exact contents of environment are controlled by the AI interface.
After the setup, the time inside of the pocket dimension is accelerated to be 1 million years a second.

4.The processes stops after a number of generations set by the interface. Then the latest specimen in the generation is extracted back into the original dimension.

5. If the original subject possessed sapience, his conciseness is extracted at the moment of death. At the time of the last generation, it is inserted into the specimen that is going to extracted.

>>55921102
can your machines not get pregnant, man-animal?

I would step out perectly adapted to the room the machine was in, and also probably adapted to killing whoever else was in there for their calories and with the prey/hunger drive to do it. Evolution is scary yo.

>>55921152
I don't know what would come out and I'm not sure I'd want to.

>>55921152
If there are no pressures in the environment to get the species to change then the species will not change. its why sharks today are very similar to sharks from millions of years ago, there is no reason to change then it will not change.

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>>55921152
>>55921428
I'm sorry I didn't make it clear -
The pressures are created by the AI. Different set and combinations and order of pressures can be selected with the interface thus allowing infinite field for experimentation.

>>55920632

>You step into the accelerated society machine

See how both require more than just a single person?

>>55921745
Wow, you sure showed OP that you hate fun.

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>>55921152
>>55921518
I also like an idea of The Machine being completely alien, incomprehensible, in a lot of ways not perfect and at times, absolutely terrifying

>While it can definitely copy the subject and create a suitable environment for it, the worlds themselves are not pretty. Bizarre worlds populated by bizarre creatures, and sometimes even artificial structures. All that points to a conclusion that the AI is living, thinking and very creative in the most frightening kind of ways.

>WARNING. Any conditions that are not set by the user are a subject to AIs decisions. Thus it can introduce new environmental pressures on the species, according to it's own "imagination".

>No one can say what happens to the world and all living there when the single final product species is extracted. It is assumed that such world is simply deleted.

>>55921152
>>55921837
Sounds like a cool torture device to be honest.
>Subject is forced to live out an entire life, "resurrected", at the moment of death from their point of view, in increasingly more alien bodies.

Only draw back is that after a round or two, you might not have something capable of speech exit the torture chamber.

>>55920655
this is the only realistic answer

>>55920632
So basicly the Ultimates from Ben 10?

Through the simulation that creates that evolution is designed for the combat an survival of the fittest.

>"works by placing the DNA of the alien in a certain simulation, making it suffer the worst possible scenario in millions of theoretical years in order to "force" evolution in the genetic code in the virtual environment, the evolutionary developments are then modified into the existing DNA."

>>55921518
Great! Now which ones are in this prompt? Can't cover an infinite series of possibilities in one post.

>>55921835

Or maybe I just have a different sense of fun to you?

>>55920644
Technically, ephebophiles could.

>>55920832
>Mutations are often beneficial right?
No.
Imagine you have a program.
A mutation is canging one line of code at random.
Offsprings are the modified versions of the program.

After a while, the tech looks at the files and removes the non-functionning programs, and if he finds modified programs that work better than the original (in a very anrrow field) he keeps them instead.
Rince and repeat ad nauseam

That's evolution.

>>55922571
My sense of fun doesn't involve entering threads I don't like, so you're probably right.

>>55922693

>correcting the OP means you don't like a thread

You make a lot of assumptions.

>>55920632
Nothing. Evolution is always at work but requires many generations for anything to really take hold. Unless the "Accelerated Evolution Machine" bred me with a mate and then did that a few million more times with the offspring while subjecting them to specific pressures, nothing would happen.

>>55920768
>>55920817
Except there's no selection process. You're not surviving or dying based on the suitability of your mutations to your environment, so nothing "breeds out" the bad mutations for the environemtn your in and nothing ensure you keep the good ones.
He was right in the first place, you'd just mutate randomly.

>>55920632
>Realistically speaking, what would happen?

You'd die.
You'd just get accumulate a bunch of mutations with no context and turn into one of those "no-mouth, but I must screams" creatures.

>>55920642
/thread

>>55921105
9/10 dungeon would crawl

>>55921912
Actually, it will only be shocking the first few times. After some time they would have long since acknowledged the benefits of endless reincarnation, opting to spend their many lives in deep medetation. After being released from the device, they would have the wisdom of ten thousand generations along eith uspeakable knowledge and undying patience. This machine creates gods.

>>55923000
>This machine creates gods.
Only if final product is still capable of thought.
Only if final product is capable of surviving in reality of it's origin.

After countless generations original species can devolve into monsters and conditions in virtual world can change so exit product could not live on outside.

>>55922727
Lol ok

>>55923074

Necessary shitposting. Nice.

>>55920632
Nothing. "Evolution" on a sample size of one is just cancer and deformity. But more likely, the subject will experience none of those.

>>55920632

Here's a better question:

>a powerful seer gives you a glimpse of future humanity
>what do you see?

My betting is a vaguely brown, mostly hairless, heavily deformed, overweight, disjointed blobs, sitting in floating chairs, using surgically altered eyes to watch an augmented reality around us.

>>55923042
Since sentience is always re-inserted, they'd always be capable of thought.
Not necessarily anything else.

>>55923042
Exactly, intelligence is merely a fluke of evolution because evolution only cares about the ability of passing down your genes and there is always a give an take, bigger and better brains need more energy and make birth and early development more tricky and dangerous, which can actually have a negative impact in the survival of a specie, and devolution is a real thing, look for example bears of the Ice Age compared with bears nowadays, in the Ice Age they were better in nearly all possible stats, but that had drawbacks.

>>55920632
You evolute accerelatedly, of course.

>>55923347
>evolution only cares about the ability of passing down your genes
Octopuses really believe this.

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>>55922638
>Pedophiles are the future of evolution, along with prepubescent fertility

>>55923347
>they were better in nearly all possible stats, but that had drawbacks.

So they were better in every way except for those they weren't.

>>55923347
you cannot devolve, it is not possible. Just like scientifically speaking you cannot deaccelerate. You can accelerate in a different direction. You can evolve differently, but even "reverting" to a less complex state is still evolution. Evolution is a non directed process and as such has no end state, and beginning state

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>>55923853

>death in childbirth skyrockets

>>55920632
All the microbes in you evolve really quickly

>>55923853
>>55924167
Well, I'm not gonna advocate kiddie diddling, but rationally, it would make sense for people to grow smaller. We're not relying on raw strength for anything anymore, we're not worried about any natural predators due to the ability to craft tools and weapons. Smaller people would consume less food, require less living space. There's no reason not to downsize. Gradually.

>>55920632
From what I understand, you turn into a salamander and then sexually assault your superior officer.

>>55920632
Haven't there have been studies that found humans have slowly been getting more and more androgynous over the generations?

Actually I'm pretty sure there's been several mock up of "evolved humans"

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>>55924226
So it's okay that I want to love Madoka?

>>55924167
Sounds like fake news, CNN.

>>55921912
>Only draw back is that after a round or two, you might not have something capable of speech exit the torture chamber.
I have no mouth and I must scream.

>>55924000
Basically they had a higher requirement of calories and when the megafauna went away, so did they.

Another example of this would be the megalodon

>>55924162
By devolving I mean losing traits that we might consider more desirable like being faster and smarter.

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>>55920632
Evolution is selection by the environment through a process of elimination, powered by random mutations in species. Without reproduction evolution cannot occur.

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>>55921358

wouldn't parasitism upon anyone else in the room be better?

>>55924167
>you can only die giving birth in a skyrocket

>>55922638
explain

>>55924242
I submit that you understand very little.

>>55924226
Kiddie diddling would be like, the opposite of a good way to do that. Hitting people before they're done with puberty is a gamble on how large they'd actually get!

>>55920632
I evolve to become an advanced being which realizes that OP doesn't understand the process of evolution.

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>>55921358

>>55921428
You know shit about sharks.

>>55925328
You're not getting anywhere by thinking that "devolution" is a thing. Evolution is any change in gene frequency across generations, positive or negative. Also, huge components of the vague traits that you mentioned are environmentally determined and might also have pleiotropies involving tradeoffs with other traits.

>>55929334
Or how long they live. We get a lot of cancer and other bad stuff later in life because selection pressures can only really have effects until reproduction happens.

>>55920632

Die of Cancer.

>>55920632

A flesh-eating supervirus is spawned within your entrails.

>>55921102
You misunderstand, it's not that you impregnate the machine.

I think... I feel... I know! Oh, the music, the music! How beautiful it is! It is the music of the stars...

>>55920632
you are placed into a world with some other humans and you live out your life. The world lasts for 100 million years and then the iteration of human with the closest match to your original DNA is cloned and brought back into the world where you stepped into the machine. In the world where you entered the machine, the process only took 5 minutes.

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>>55924226
Evolution doesn't favor traits that are the most useful, it favors traits that will increase the chance of procreation.
Even if as a whole humanity would be better off being smaller, the fact that any individual man is considered more attractive the taller he is ensures evolution won't go that way.
Reduced intelligence is a likely one. Our current technological explosion isn't a static state and nature prefers balance, the more technological amenities we have the less intelligence we'll need to survive and the less intelligence we have the less additional technology we'll develop. We'll eventually hit an equilibrium where there's a minimum intelligence required to use our developed technology and the developmen of new technology halts completely. (tens of thousands of years into the future I mean, it's an evolutionary timescale)

>>55924226
>There's no reason not to downsize. Gradually.
t. manlet

On a more serious note though, it's actually the opposite, without a limitation for growth (like say living in a desert or on trees) the evolutionary tendencies push towards bigger individuals, that's why dinosaurs got so big and mammals did the same after them. You can also see this pattern in human evolution as we are almost double the height of our progenitor primates and a good feet taller than the average human in ancient history.

>>55930297
Is modern human getting taller really an evolutionary thing or just a consequence of better living conditions?
I know that women find tall men more attractive but most short people I know still end up having kids so I'm not sure.

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>>55930492

I think it's mostly just better nutrition. Native American tribes of the great plains, for example, were some tall motherfuckers. PDF related.

>>55926375
Fucking them would be even better.

>>55929851
The decline in technological development over the last 60 years or so–coupled with Idiocracy existing as a concept and being provably true–says otherwise.

>>55930653
>tall motherfuckers
>average heights below 180cm

Manlet detected.

>>55930727
>Idiocracy existing as a concept and being provably true

The only evidence for that is all the people on the internet who think it's true. Actual science shows that people are getting smarter, not dumber.

>>55930832

What part of "Tallest in the World" did you not understand?
It was all of it, wasn't it?

>>55930840
Yeah, you’ll want to look at IQs around the world and also where births are above the replacement rate. It doesn’t matter if every white averages 200 IQ points if they only comprise 1% of the global population of sub-70 retards.

>>55930849

What part of "manlet" did you not understand? Average heights across Europe alone are above 180.

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>>55923042
>AI tries to torture someone with this
>After one round, the subject emerges as a deformed blob of tissue
>"How do you like that, organi-"
>They destroy the AI with a thought
>My desktop when

>>55930874

>are
>not were

You suck at reading comprehension. From the PDF:

>Remarkably, these Native American men were about I to 2 centimeters taller than Euro-Americans of the same era.
>Numerous studies of military heights have shown that Euro-Americans of the mid nineteenth century were 5 to 10 centimeters taller than contemporary Europeans, and about the same stature as Euro-Australians.

>The available historical record of heights therefore indicates that Great Plains Native American men were tallest in the world during the mid-nineteenth century

>>55930929

>"You suck at reading comprehension."
>he buys into the "people were always shorter" meme

Do some actual research, pleb.

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>>55930929
Euromanlets, when will they learn?

>>55921837
This sounds a lot like SCP-914's Very Fine setting, except focused on evolution. Whatever comes out of it is usually going to be dangerous and terrifying.

>>55930964

Okay, now you're just being retarded. I was specifically arguing against the idea that people are "evolving" to be taller, and the implication that there's a linear progression from short people in the past to super tall people of the future. I was pointing to nutrition and environment as major factors in a population's average height.
Native Americans used to be the tallest in the world in the mid 19th century, but their average height fell in the early 20th due to poverty and malnutrition.

At no point was I arguing that people were always shorter. What's more, I have provided actual research, while you're spouting dumb internet memes.

Stone age Europeans were also pretty tall.
Turns out people are better fed and less stressed in hunter gatherer lifestiles and it helps that disease resistance isn't the most important thing to pass on to your descendants

>>55931008

Yep. The perception that we're evolving to be taller is actually brought about by gradually improving nutrition and medical advances, not genes.

>>55931003

>At no point was I arguing that people were always shorter

Yeah, you were, spastic. You're trying to argue that 177cm was the tallest average height in the world in the 1800s. Nice meme, and you don't even understand why you're arguing for it. Classic from someone who claims others are being retarded.

>>55927106
I suppose anon refers to the concept of "having more generations in a shorter span of time works with the natural genetic deviation and variability argument."

Otherwise I have no idea.

Also, supposedly reproducing when you're older leads to more mutations, it's true that more disadvantageous ones than other processes, but also it's possible that a few beneficial ones get in the mix much faster? maybe meaning that if you're a very old man and have many children with different women, most of those kids are going to suck, some are going to be ok, and there would be the very occassional probably much better than their predecessors candidate in the mixture.

>>55931003
>I was specifically arguing against the idea that people are "evolving" to be taller
but they are evolving to be taller, at least in the modern day
Tall men have more children than short people which in the long term will result in taller people and that's mostly because they are considered more attractive
The reason why people weren't so tall before was famine and plague both of which aren't a problem in the modern world (and weren't really a problem for hunter gatherers)

>>55931033

If you're going to criticize the paper, that's one thing, but you need some "actual research" not just sneering and bullshit.

>>55930874
>MANLET MANLET MANLET MANLET
does this shit actually matter to people lmao

>>55931046
>but they are evolving to be taller, at least in the modern day

Possibly so, but I think that's far from proven.

>>55931048

>"some tall motherfuckers"
>"hurr durr my paper proves I was right durr!!1!"

Get over yourself, manlet. 177cm is not tall.

>>55931067

>177cm average is not tall

In the mid 19th century, apparently it was, since it was 1-2 cm taller than average for US/Australia, and 6-12cm taller than European average.
Though I wouldn't be terribly surprised if the paper missed out some super tall Zulu motherfuckers, I notice you still have no actual research showing any mid-19th century populations with a bigger average height.

>>55931066
Multiple studies have shown that tall men have way more children that short ones. I'm pretty sure that was always the chase.
That being said taller people need more food than short people so if food isn't plentiful short people have an advantage which kept the height in check.
That's no longer the case in modern day so people are getting taller

>>55931126

>he doesn't know how to use Google

Stay ignorant, manlet pleb.

>>55931158

Sure, but is that genetic or epigenetic?

>>55931181

>I'm too dumb and lazy to back up my claims

>do my research for me plz

>>55931183
>Sure, but is that genetic or epigenetic?
It's both.
Famine kept height i check both epigenetic (if you don't get enough food you don't grow as tall) and genetic (tall people need more food so they're more likely to stave to death and not pass on their height)

>>55920632
Humanity has already reached a point where there's no real selection pressure on us. You could argue that sexual selection would make an impact, but undesirable men just sleep with undesirable women so it all balances out. Although, I suppose it's theoretically possible that SJW,s pollacks, robots, and other extremists that ultimately cannot or will not breed might slowly decline (compared to previous centuries when basically everyone bred) but even then I doubt there would be any marked effects.

T. Evolutionary biologist. Science kills fun ideas yet again.

>>55920632
Evolution is the result of environmental factors and what traits a species is born with, until so many generations have passed that they have developed an array of traits corresponding to their environment. Unless the machine itself had some form of predetermined environments that I would be pitted against and could simulate me passing on my genes for countless generations, it would simply do nothing.

>>55931250
>You could argue that sexual selection would make an impact, but undesirable men just sleep with undesirable women so it all balances out
multiple studies prove you wrong
http://www.independent.co.uk/news/science/tall-men-likely-to-have-bigger-families-173262.html

>>55920632
You would evolve to match the specifications of the machine as an environment.

>>55920632

You instantly have a baby which has a baby which has a baby which has a baby and so on until the species is no longer the same, I guess. It can't change you because that's not what evolution is, it's an observation of genetic changes over time in a population and not a change in any individual.

>>55920632
>accelerated evolution machine
what does that mean?
Evolution can't happen without multiple specimens and selective pressures. Anything else is not evolution.

What exactly can the machine

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>>55920632
>FIVE THOUSAND YEARS OF FORCED EVOLUTION

>>55922638
lmfao

>>55922643
>After a while, the tech looks at the files and removes the non-functionning programs,

Except that the majority of mammals will breed and pass off their fucked up genes, which would result in an even more fucked up generation, followed by an even more fucked up generation, and so on and so on.

>and if he finds modified programs that work better than the original (in a very anrrow field) he keeps them instead.

except that is absurd, because if you understand how programming works you know their wouldn't be any.

Lol, that gives me an idea for a funny trap.

1) Make gas chamber
2) Label "Evolution Machine"
3) Profit!!

>>55920632
Realistically speaking what you just said makes no fucking sense.

>>55932446
It is clearly labeled in small print, "Warning, will result in painful, prolonged, agonizing death."

>>55932418
It doesn't matter how many iterations of a program you make, random changes will always result in harmful mutations.

99% of those changes would result in a total meltdown of the gene sequence, and because the vast majority of those surviving would breed, each generation would be more degenerate than the last.

There has to be some sort of stabilizing factor at work other than selective breeding. Otherwise we'd have deer with 9 heads and 3 balls.

>>55932495
I tried to explain this to a scientist friend of mine. He didn't get it. Don't try and tell me its not a religion.

>>55920632
Nothing, because evolution doesn't apply to individuals

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>>55930863
>Using IQ as a measurment of intelligence

>>55920977
Devolving makes more sense, because we actually have dormant genes from our ancestors that one could activate.

People have done it with chickens already and they grow tails like dinosaurs.

>>55932569

...that image gets a lot funnier now that trump has challenged his own guy to an IQ test machine.

>>55933016
Trump only challenges people to IQ contests because he knows they won't come at him, bro.

Thing is, he knows if he posts his IQ there's going to be a multitude of people higher than him, and since that would hurt his ego he won't do it. He's an experienced bully though - he won't go after anyone who would actually call him out on his bullshit unless he has a way to discredit them, like "fake news", or claiming they're a liberal or whatever.

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>>55920632
You become chosen by the Getter Rays and try to conquer the universe.

>>55932418
>>55932495
>>55932508
There are large segments of each gene that are called Non-Coding Regions. These sections are just not utilized to produce any proteins, and their biological purpose is debated. However, many mutations in the gene sequence occue in these regions, which have absolutely zero effect on the organism.
Furthermore, each three nucleotides (ACGT, going back to the programming example, the letters and numbers in each line of code) code for an amino acid, and there are more combinations of nucleotides than amino acids, so this means that even if a mutation occurs in a coding region there is a not unreasonable chance that the new codon will produce the exact same amino acid, which results in zero change in the organism.
And even if a leucine is swapped for an isoleucine, as long as the resulting protein has about the same shape and content then the organism can still function. The only innately destructive mutations are when a stop command is shoved into the middle of a protein which cuts the entire thing short (think of turning half of an entire program's worth of code into comments. The end result will crash and fail), or deletion or addition of new nucleotides, which messes up the order of how it is read nd produces an entirely different protein that will likely look nothing like the original. Other than these mutations I mentioned most are 'silent' mutations which have no effect.

Source: Biology Grad.

>>55920632
If we assume "magic machine that turns you into how human will look like in the future, I'd expect a condom-breaking device on my penis and mental inability to pull out

>>55932508
tried to explain what?
are you retarded?

Why are people on 4chan so obsessed with height?

>>55920632
You would perfectly adapt to the environment of the machine, once you left it however you would probably be quite incompatible with the environment

>>55923853
Women are hitting puberty earlier and earlier, granted I mostly blame women on birth control pissing estrogen into the water.

>>55920632
You turn into Devin Townsend
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WGRiYTb_FqI&ab_channel=DigThis

>>55920768
Does that mean that you would evolve to evolve more since your environment would be an evolution enhancer?

>>55930492
>Is modern human getting taller really an evolutionary thing or just a consequence of better living conditions?
It's because we have so many calories in our diet compared to the past. For an interesting read, look up the documented physical differences between North Koreans and South Koreans who were born in the early 1990s, when NK was having a significantly bad bout of famine (more so than usual).

Babies who grew up in the early 1990s there have noticeably smaller bodies and noticeably larger heads compared to body size than their SK brethren, because in a starvation situation, a child's body will devote resources to brain development before other areas, leading to a bunch of bobble-head Norks.

>>55935712
I blame everyone being a low test beta on that too.

>>55931268
>http://www.independent.co.uk/news/science/tall-men-likely-to-have-bigger-families-173262.html

I live in an area with a lot of Amish people who have 12+ kids per family, and they're awfully short compared to the non-Amish around here.

My left hand and arm would change to by platter like in order to hold takeaways and pizzas. My tongue is a long spoon that can lap up said takeaways like a cat. My right hand becomes a thumb for texting and two long skewer like fingers for impromptu kebabs and pushing buttons on a remote. My legs turn into a mass of flesh as I shuffle around like a retarded Jabba the Hut.

I become perfectly adapted for this sedate future world.

>>55935640
>Why are people on 4chan so obsessed with height?
It's mostly that some trolls on 4chan have realized that some people are self-conscious about their height, so they just shotgun MANLET MANLET MANLET in the hopes of it sticking somewhere.

>>55935752
Wasn't that found to be more of a result of BC'd women selecting for more feminine men? Or something to that effect.

>>55935793
Personal antecdotes, while potentially interesting, aren't actually good sources of information. There may be one guy out there who got cancer from a rabbit, and you may know that guy, but that doesn't make rabbits a carcinogen, savvy?

>>55931334
It actually evolves the bacteria in your body.

>>55934122
Good post that everyone will ignore

>>55924307
>We're going to eventually evolve into a species of cybernetic futa lolis

My god.

>>55931334
My horrible, uneducated guess is it simulates environmental pressure and accelerates cell regrowth and possibly cell death as well in order to artificially evolve a given single specimen.
Let's say you wanted to walk on lava.
The evolution chamber would heat itself to an unbearable temperature and accelerate your cell growth to negate any damage caused by constant overheat-based cell death, with the side effect of letting cells slowly evolve into heat-resistant or even heatproof variants until you can walk on lava.
Essentially artificial natural mutation.

>>55920632
You die a horrible, agonizing death as the various microbes and parasites in your body evolve to kill you faster than your immune system can keep them down. Maybe. How accelerated are we talking about here? Is reproduction accelerated?

>>55920676
Evolution happens through mutation

>>55938862
Parasites and microbes that naturally live in a specific host species general evolve to have higher virality and lower lethality.

>>55938822
Holy hell, each cell in your feet would need to mutate to gain the heat-resistent gene individually, and even if it worked you wouldn't be able to pass on your new-found mutations because your sperm would be untouched.

>>55938822
So it would just give you cancer

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>>55939293
If you willingly walk into a "Accelerated Evolution Machine", you are the cancer.

>>55920632
>accelerated evolution machine
So like a bubble of accelerated time?
Or do you mean a machine that induces mutation in a subject?

>>55939107
Assuming the chamber is top of the line, it might aim to induce mutation simultaneously and presumably have a setting to allow the resultant mutation to be hereditary.

>>55939107
Pretty much. A highly micromanaged, meticulously designed, minimal risk and easily curable cancer variant for the sole purpose of DNA manipulation, but still a cancer.
But what do i know, i'm just an uneducated farmer.

>>55940282
Are you a cancer farmer?

>>55940356

Yes, actually, I'm rather proud of Corphish.
Best female crab i've ever had.
Seven clutches of three and she's still dancing!

>>55940282
>A setting to allow the resultant mutation to be hereditary.
The machine would then need the ability to go into your sperm individually and manually alter the genetic sequence of each one to include the new genetic information, and if it can do that why wouldn't it just change your feet cells to be heat resistent instead of using a literal trial by fire?
Mutations in your body are not inheritable. If you dunk your head in a vat of toxic waste and grow a third eyeball your children will be normal, and even if your radiate your balls your children won't have the same mutations as you or even each other.

>>55940501
Couldn't it alter sperm production directly? All the DNA in a sperm cell has to come from somewhere. If every cell in the body was snap evolved to be heat resistant, why would newly produced sperm suddenly lack that piece of DNA?

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>>55920632

>>55940557
Okay I see what you're saying. But now we have the concern of each mutation being present in the entire body. If your feet cells die and divide a billion times until they can resist the heat's flame, then they are inherently going to pick up other mutations during the process that may not be immediately present. If a new foot cell becomes heat resistent and in the same mutation becomes unable to produce a neutransmitter like GABA, that won't affect your foot but once the machine duplicates it amongst all of your body cells then you fuckin' die. I don't think there's a reasonable way to even theoretically take a small-scale mutation and make it large-scale across an entire human body unless you implant the new genes from the mutation into an egg or sperm.

>>55940894

Not yet anyway.
Then again and i curse myself for resorting to such a second rate excuse we don't have evolution accelerators either.
This is entirely a sci-fi scenario, and we can reason that future technology has solved even that problem if accelerated evolution is possible.
Maybe by phasing the faulty cells out over the course of accelerated cell regeneration and -death?

But either way, we can easily assume the chamber to be an example of a physical echo chamber.
Only environmental pressure (the afforementioned temperature increase) can affect cell development.
Therefore any side mutations would most likely be for quality of life (fluid stockpiling, heat dispersion, adaptive secretions, the like) rather than random potentially harmful side mutations. Any faulty cells that did escape evolutionary "powercycling" would probably be few enough for any potential disease to be cured before severe symptoms occur given a properly trained doctor and suitable equipment.

>>55941305
Or it's an extremely powerful computer simulation that models how your body would behave with different mutations, and only edits your physical DNA when it finds a combination that would let you survive.

>>55941401
That too. Maybe a medical system automatically detecting and removing harmfully mutated cells before they have a chance to replicate.

>>55938336
Nah, but bigger heads/eyes, smaller mouths/noses on more androgynous bodies are pretty common projections, so humans are slowly evolving into animes

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>>55943020
Gaze upon the future of man

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GUYS! I spilt some coffee in the machine again!

>>55934122
bump of truth

>>55920632
hopefully it would clear up my acne
I'M 29 DAMN IT
IT WASN'T SUPPOSED TO BE THIS WAY

>>55944480
Eat less shit, get more sleep, wash your face gently with soap when you shower.

>>55944480
>>55944569
Also change your pillowcases every so often.

You would evolve the ability to resist accelerated evolution.

>>55944779
>You would evolve the ability to resist evolution.
It's called negroid genotype.

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>>55944799
Look, if you're going keep posting on this board you're gonna have to, at some point, post about something that isn't niggers or SJWs or messi or whatever it is you /pol/yps are enraged about this week.

You guys can't be dropping into every thread on /tg/ and just niggering up the place like you do.

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>>55944799
When you wake up in the morning, consider suicide.

>>55920938
>so unless the machine is going to turn you into something that can reproduce asexually
hmm

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>>55921001
After watching TOS and TNG, I have only heard tell rumours of this ep., have never seen any pictures or read about it, and this picture is more horrifying than anything I could have imagined

>>55931033
>You're trying to argue that 177cm was the tallest average height in the world in the 1800s.
do you have evidence it wasn't?

>>55931250
>Although, I suppose it's theoretically possible that SJW,s pollacks, robots, and other extremists that ultimately cannot or will not breed
>pollacks
hey!

>>55947602

I would venture a guess that he doesn't have squat.

>>55947627

I'm sure he meant /pol/lacks.

>>55944569
>>55944630
I do all of those, but thank you
it's genetic, my dad still has acne and he's 50

>>55920632
https://youtu.be/oWTgvRGwzWg