>>46840826
Hey OP. Guess what, she is a Mary Sue because she provides some shaft for GM's longsword and you are going to get fucked over. Just leave.

>>46840826
>the GM is currently banging the elf player, and he is deeply in love with her.

Dude, you're in trouble. The DM will rule against you whenever opportunity arises, e.g. if you send scouts out, 'by chance' they will be ambushed and reveal your secrets etc

What level are you specifically? Asking so that we can get an idea what capella you have access to.

Also, wind wall will fuck over the arcane archer hardcore.

>>46840826
>army of 2000 soldiers, despite the population being 2100
Send outriders to burn down his villages.

>>46840826
What system?

What's your budget?

Archers are typically vulnerable to Wind Walls (arrow deflection), Earth and Water Elementals (Earth Move or swimming), and spells like Cloudkill. High DR golems are also a strong counter, as arrows have trouble against DR, and golems often ignore precision damage. You may also want to try anti-undead tactics, massed cavalry, and fire.

>>46840936
>>46841015
>>46841029

I didn't send spies or scouts to the elven realm, because there is some strange magical protection there. Basically if you're not born in that realm, you get lost chasing illusions and dreams from your past, no save.
We had to go there for a while, and even following the road without the Elf we got lost and nearly died.

I'm a generalist wizard lv 14 from D&D 3.5, LE. Other than this, I have a strong network of criminals, nobles and spies on my side as i worked as diplomatic/spy/middleman for my realm. I'm also an expert alchemist and poisoner and have access to all my hometown warehouses and shops.

Plus I have created a boarding school for nobles children in town, and have 4 teachers, two servants and an old soldier as weapon master/trainer. I have sent all the students to their families, but some of them have decided to stay and help in the fight. One of them is a lv1 sorcerer and all of them have some training in shooting firearms.

The party is still picking sides. I think the sorcerer is going to help the elf, but I think the others will stay out of this.

>>46841195
Denounce them for attacking a peaceful country for blatant warmongery reasons
Ask neighboring humans and elf haters for help in defending your city from teh asshates
Burn down Elven forests and research ways to break the enchantment in your free time

Seriously what kind of dumb ass reason is land expansion when your a fucking elf from a magical forest that protects you from everything? Besides your a port city and I didn't hear anything bout a blockading elf navy so you can pretty much wait them out indefinitely.

why the fuck "good" elves would ally with undead forces

>>46840826
Play up that elves would be shit at anything other than waiting outside the walls. Extremely low risk of blitz or wall rush. Hell even tunnelling wouldnt work for them. They typically lack breach capability to find a way to be able to wait them out. Endless water, food, stores for repair etc

>>46841356
Also if they cant blockade the port then you can just keep bringing supplies in

>the GM is currently banging the elf player, and he is deeply in love with her. She is a good player, but she got very strong-overpowered stuff in the last month
Well youre fucked. Walk away now

>>46841312
>Burn down Elven forests and research ways to break the enchantment in your free time

Don't do that, burning down the forest makes you look bad so you'll have more trouble getting allies, also may provoke a more all out attack by the elves.

>Seriously what kind of dumb ass reason is land expansion when your a fucking elf from a magical forest that protects you from everything?
This. Point out that the town is peaceful, the attackers tried to harm innocent students, innocent villagers will die etc

>>46840826
2000 is very small for an army, though it sounds like your don't have a similarly sized one.

I would call in mercenaries to bolster your forces, and make your priority taking out their siege weapons. If they can't get through your walls, then you can daily wait them out using supplies from the sea during the night.

Prepare any anti-magical defenses you cab. Teleportation, flight, or a spell to crumble the wall could ruin you. Golems or elementals with resistance to mundane weapons are helpful as well. If you're not opposed to necromancy, skeletons and zombies could help recoup any losses.

Make sure you also prepare mundane defenses against things that might get like lobbed in, such as fire arrows. Set up barrels of water around.

I'd suggest getting allies, but the DM might not spring for that.

Alternatively, booby trap the entire city, and have the populace flee at night across the ocean. Then just wait until they charge in and nuke the place.

Abother alternative, do the above, but dont set traps. When the army approaches, throw open the gates, and cast a windwall to protect you from arrows. Then, just stand there doing something odd. They'll obviously assume that youre baiting them into a trap. Ideally, they'll spend so much time fretting about this that you can use it as a great distraction for any number of things. Or I'd they actually charge in then you just teleport away and nuke the city.

>>46841497
The elves already attacked, its not a damning move to make countermeasures to stop them from starting shit again. She already sent out her entire population to attack one city. If it weren't for the enchanted woods bs her home would already be gone from a third party of orcs or whatever. Getting rid of the woods magic permanently stops her ever doing anything so aggressive again.

>>46841195
>I didn't send spies or scouts to the elven realm, because there is some strange magical protection there. Basically if you're not born in that realm, you get lost chasing illusions and dreams from your past, no save.
>We had to go there for a while, and even following the road without the Elf we got lost and nearly died.

>I'm a generalist wizard lv 14 from D&D 3.5, LE.

Ok, you've got a good chance. Level 7 spells are strong.

>>Other than this, I have a strong network of criminals, nobles and spies on my side as i worked as diplomatic/spy/middleman for my realm.
Also good. Offer criminals pardons for foiling the plans of the elves, etc but don't let them hold positions of power so that they might betray you.
>>I'm also an expert alchemist and poisoner and have access to all my hometown warehouses and shops.

Get siege weapons shipped in/made, which have metal domes as arrow shields.

>Plus I have created a boarding school for nobles children in town, and have 4 teachers, two servants and an old soldier as weapon master/trainer. I have sent all the students to their families, but some of them have decided to stay and help in the fight. One of them is a lv1 sorcerer and all of them have some training in shooting firearms.
You'll need more manpower. Offer a scholarship to all townsfolk - one per family - for fighting on the walls. Crossbows are easy enough to use, and siege weapons are simple if you're not the guy aiming.

>>46840826
Why has this devolved into a siege?

It's your town, and she's expanding her kingdom?
Why not just thrash out a diplomatic agreement - "yes we'll be part of the kingdom, no, you won't rule over us like dicks, elves get a bit of tax, your town gets trade and protection", find some terms you both agree on, maybe throw in a magic abortion and you can resolve an interparty conflict just fine.

Alternatively, make sure you know the water sources they'll be drinking from and get your thieves ready to poison them, set up arcs of fire, and call upon the forces of evil to aid you

>>46841335
The're not allied and are not good, They are the subjects of this Death Knight,he was the consort husband of their last queen at last 1000 years ago. He killed her in a fit of rage and got cursed with immortality. According to their Law, until he dies, he is their rightful king.

And according to some phophesy, He can only be slain by a god.

>>46841312

I Have got a Defensive Alliance with 3 others countries, but I have only got response from one of them and it's sending a small force to help, but not before the siege.

I think I can ask the main good churches to send help because of the Death Knight. Maybe I can make appear this as an Holy Crusade?

>>46841384
>>46841356
>>46841497
>>46841582
Sorry, I think I have explained myself wrong, but my city is on a very large river, not the sea.

I can still get supplies from other cities in my realm by the river. Maybe even troops.

Not opposed to necromancy at all, even if the main religion of the town is strongly aganist it. I'm afraid that the Death Knight will be able to control my undeads without much difficulty however.

>>46841195
Summon Monster 7 will provide you with Huge or 1d3 Large Elementals. 7 also get you Xill, which have limited utility but having one drop into the middle of their archer ranks via Ethereal travel would not be a bad idea. Invisible Stalkers are also a good idea, as they effectively force a party member to respond (as archers without magic items will not be able to do much against them).

Golems might be a bit expensive for you to pull off, but a few cheap Stone Golems would also help you a lot.

Given that this is a siege, you may want to acquire a Lyre of Building to help prevent incursions. Throw a low-level bard on it, and you'll protect a decent chunk of masonry from most attacks for a while.

While they're more expensive, an Orb of Storms (for Weather Control, so you can produce extremely high winds) and an Instant Fortress would also be good ideas.

You need a way to handle the Arcane Archer and that Death Knight. I doubt you'll be allowed to kill either of them, but the spell Forcecage might work to delay one in a pinch. And Contingency can help avoid that pinch.

And if you have the time and Psionics are allowed, ye olde Delayed Blast Fireball + Quintessence nuke is always fun.

>>46841694
A river is fine too, so long as its large enough. It means that the elves will have to control all the shores along it in order to deny you supplies, which means a siege can't wait you out.

Undead are probably a bad call because of the death knight thing.

Asking the churches for help is a good call. As for your other allies, just focus on taking out anything she can possibly use to get past your walls. Drag things out until you can get allies or mercenaries or both to bolster your ranks.

>>46841774
Not to mention he could make more rivers, via a Decanter of Endless Water (and some time, of course).

>>46841694
>He can only be slain by a god.
No good trying to kill him, then. And he's probably quite powerful. Your best bet is to either Forcecage him or deport him from this plane.

>>46841876
A moat could be helpful as well. Makes it harder for them to scale the walls

Couldn't you frame it as a unite or die kind of situation? If they're willing to send that much of their population out to conquer now, they'll only do it more and more. You could try and convince some local powers that if they don't back you now, they will fall later.
Hell, this could end up being the start of a strong local confederation of cities!

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>>46840826
Well, I've got some books on sieges I can sort of help you with. I can think up some fantasy solutions but for now I'll give you basic practical ones. To counteract hollywood sieges

Essentially surviving comes down to knowing more about an actual siege than the DM does.

>Counteract the arrows by having the people build pavises for your defenders, ones that can be strapped to the back or deployed if need be
>Boiling oil is a cliche in medieval war movies, what they actually used was cauldrons of boiling water with sand in it. This means it's cheap, you can employ it MANY times as a defender
>Strengthen your gate, extra beams and barricades will invalidate the efforts of battering rams
>Hire some dwarfs to set up counter-mines if you think the army will try to mine under your walls, you can then flood these mines with poison and close them. Dig them out in front of your castle walls so that their mining attempts will hit these pockets of poison-filled digging, and they won't reach your walls.
>Arrange for reinforcements to show up DURING an assault on your forces, preferrably after you've shot down 25-40% of the attackers, this will cause panic in the elves.
>
>If the DM brings up that catapults are shooting at you from afar, you have to stop him and correct him. Fuck his dramatic storytelling, trebuchets have to be set up VERY close to your walls in order to be effective, and you have to point out that NO catapult can in fact collapse a wall, cannons changed history by being able to attack walls at their bases, thus collapsing them. Cite John Keegan's History of Warfare and Konstantin Nossov's Ancient and Medieval Siege Weapons. This is not pedantic, you can't allow the DM to fuck you over because he thought kingdom of heaven was cool. Stone throwers historically are only capable of taking out defenders on the battlements by tearing the stone parts on the top off. Show him pic fucking related if he argues and don't let up, this makes the game more fair

>>46841659
Basically the School is for nobles children, teaching them politics, geography math, and other stuff, making them good rulers and decent people. With the taxes money, I've created scholarships for talented students with economic difficulties. The lv1 sorcerer is my oldest scholarship student.

I introduced the firearms and weapons traning after one of my students died in a duel and another one was killed by some bandits during a robbery.

>>46841685

I tried to offer her an alternative, but she really want to crush my hometown as a way to say the world who is in charge and that her daddy is back in action after centuries of meditation.

She is surprised that I resisted the idea and didn't give her the way into the city.
She said "I thought you were smart enough to not oppose me and my father. He can be stopped only by a god and you're just a teacher."

>>46842036
adding to this, stockpile shit tons of food and make ABSOLUTELY sure that you can trust everyone inside. Starvation and inside betrayal have ended far more sieges then assault.

>>46842092
>stopped only by a god

This is important. He can only be KILLED by a god, but stopping him is much easier.

Being immortal doesn't prevent you from being shoved in a box.

Also >>46842036

Look up a lot of mundane siege defenses and history about them. Have water to counteract fire, plenty of food, and ways to keep them out. Time is on your side.

>>46841876
>deport him

Kek

Sending him to the plane of positive energy could be funny

And I agree that summons will be useful, especially if you can make multiple ones that have aoe attacks. The one that anon suggested that can steal items is also good, especially if the DM gave some OP items.

Contingency will be crucial for making your turns the most efficient they can be. Bonus points for having a contingency that triggers when you cast x spell that requires an immediate action, so you can effectively cast it outside of your turn.

Fireball has a long range and will fry scores of enemies at once.

Could you also remind the good churches that the death knight won't stop here and shall likely roll up the land until they are conquered too? Also I'd reckon he'll be using necromancy and undead, which should be stopped from wreaking too much havok etc

This might be a bad idea, but you might want to talk to said DM and see what he will and won't allow within the siege.

His goal is to provide fun for both of you without upsetting his GF, right? It might not be a bad idea for you to see how far he's willing to go in either direction (whether he'll let you win at all, and what exploits he'll allow on either side, given the disadvantage you're at).

If you can find an alternative result that doesn't screw you both over, or at least a result that provides lots of fun for everyone involved, he might even help you out a bit.

Be sure to point out that having a "teacher" beat a godlike entity (or at least challenge one) is a lot more exciting than letting the teacher get curbstomped.

>>46842092
>He can be stopped only by a god
Do you know any gods?
Would paladins or clerics count, for god-by-proxy?

>>46842185
Alternatively, aim for a plane with a powerful Good deity on it. He can only be killed by a god, right? Fine. Let's see if he pisses one off.

>>46842195
At the very least, he should ask the DM how he plans on running the battle rules-wise. If its just going to boil down to him handwaving them past the defenses and into standard combat then there's no point in preparing siege defenses.

>>46840826
your game sounds like shit.
you should probably kill yourself.

>>46842036
OP, if you read only one post, read this.

You have time on your side, so make sure to counter the enemy's ranged attacks - which should be easy enough.

Chip away at them with fireballs, sending thieves out to poison the wells the invaders will use.

PARAMOUNT: subject everyone coming through the gates to massive scrutiny. Don't let traitors in.

Be benevolent to your townsfolk, and they will fight twice as hard to defend their home.

>>46842111
Absolutely, food and loyalty will keep your walls. you don't want the elves catapulting food into the walls to get your people to betray you, do like Immortan Joe and make sure food is available to everyone.
>>46842036
Continued

>Stone is your ally, therefore rocks are your ally. Medieval forts have some NASTY ways of killing attackers directly at the walls, and physics is your friend, set up plenty of little slides to roll rocks off onto the defenders, particularly around the gate/portcullis. Longer slides will go a little further, but don't get too contrived, the goal is to knock out ram pushers.
>Use your docks to resupply your city, consider paying off pirates to hit the enemy if they try to blockade you, military ships are often well-stocked, and you should take pains to empty their cargos and split them fairly with the pirates, then either repurpose the ship of junk it for materials and barricades.
>If you have access to BEES, consider launching them into the elven ranks to sow panic and confusion, but be warned, this WILL be used against you, so save it, as a very late line of defense, so by the time they realize how good it is to turn on you, it's too late.
>Hire spies to report on the people to you, then eliminate the obvious traitors. Use their bodies to stage mock-ritual killings and drop them off outside your walls at night, so the people think the elves caught them trying to escape.

>>46842092

....fuck it, we gotta beat that bitch on principle. Listen seed the area around your town with pits and trenches filled with spikes. Break up the land to make it difficult for the elf army to maneuver or set up siege engines. Hell dig a giant moat and redirect the river around your town making it into an artificial island, do whatever you can to make approaching your town difficult. Especially with what that one anon said bout catapults and whatnot, if she cant get close she cant do jack. Area denial is your friend anon.

>>46840826
Out of curiosity, how difficult would it be for you to bribe a dragon to attack their army?

>>46840826
surrender

>>46842195
>>46842185
>>46842157
>>46842111
>>46842036
>>46842034
>>46842412

This is all good stuff. Thank you guys, I feel a little better know. Keep the suggestions coming!

I will try to pull every favor I have done to nobles, ambassador and politicians to raise an army of soldiers and mercenaries. I will also ask the Churches to rally the masses and set up a Crusade aganist the elves, just to send them home, not to destroy their homeland.

I also like the idea of slowing them down. She is very proud of her/elves grace and mobility.

>>46842347
basically, from when I started this character as LN, I always set some money to help renovate monuments or the walls of the city. When I got poweful enough, I created the School and started pulling favors to help with trading routes, equipment and other stuff. I spent more for that city and my school that for my equipment.

Knowing her, She will try to send small squads of infiltrators to kill key figures or to sabotage our supplies.

>>46842487

Dragons are particular in this setting. Basically you became an halfdragon by indulging yourself too much in a sin. If you are very, very sinful and creative with your sin, you became a dragon.

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>>46840826
>I'm worried, because the GM is currently banging the elf player, and he is deeply in love with her.
Lmao what

>>46842577
>I also like the idea of slowing them down. She is very proud of her/elves grace and mobility.

If you can, make it rain. Hard. Just turn the entire landscape into a fucking swamp during monsoon system. It'll ruin logistics, they'll lose most of their large equipment, and they'll generally be miserable doing so.

>>46840826

FUKKEN ANTI-ARROW BALISTAS!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TpsFWBzDHkk

>>46842621
Oh man, this. Do control weather every day, turn the land into a quagmire.

Irrigate the outside of your town, it will bog them down giving you more time to pepper them with arrows etc

>>46842577
>Knowing her, She will try to send small squads of infiltrators to kill key figures or to sabotage our supplies.
This is your mother - fucking turf, so make sure she learns that the hard way. Show her how the game of Spies is really played, and brutalize her attempts at espionage.

Maybe deforest the entire area around your town, both for supplies to fortify your defenses and give clear lines of sight, as well as giving those tree-hugging elves a big middle finger.

>>46842618
They are not a couple, or at least an official couple. She is just venting some steam and he follows her like a puppy out of the game. Me and the sorcerer's tried to talk with him but didn't work.

>>46842621

I don't know if I can win this, but I will try to make this siege an hell for them.

Do you think that we can enchant the munitions for the cannons? Or just create alchemical munitions or something similar?

>>46842409
Cont
>Learn from the mistakes of the Crusader Kingdoms. Do not skimp on the number of defenders, ever and graciously hire mercenaries, or use elementals and constructs who do not need food. Since this is D&D, you actually have some decent options here. Hobgoblins will probably be your best bet as far as mercenaries, they're lawful, loyal to the coin and the military cadre, and they fucking hate elves. Hold on to their regimental banner and they will never desert you, so long as they're fed and paid. This is written into their lore.
>If you run out of guns, arm your people with slings and stone bullets, then have them skirmish with any melee troops coming at the walls, they can run back to their homes while your melee troops hold the walls
>TAKE PRISONERS and show them mercy. Elves have long lives, appealing to that, you can get them to help you if you spare their lives. You can either release them and feed them false information, or get them to spy for you. The former is safer, considering the DM has vagina at stake.
>Pay off any local monsters or low-level bandits to attack them on the road. You have to buy time to survive a siege.
>Consider intimidation, when the army first approaches the city, appear dressed as a monk on top of the wall, carrying out some small recognizable ritual, hit a gong or two, drink tea, and appear completely calm. This will unnerve the elves, and convince them that they're walking into a trap.

>>46842769
>I don't know if I can win this, but I will try to make this siege an hell for them.
Anon the DM is god. Don't do this, do it on a way that it's so awesome and legitimately interesting he won't just say "no you can't do that".

>>46842769
Best to ask your DM about that, but even if you could it might not be the best use of your time. The cannons are still going to deal a lot of damage, and their main target is any siege-engines anyway.

Remember, while you can win by killing them, you'll have a lot of advantage by simply stalling them out.

You can get supplies from ships on the river. Every arrow they fire, meal they eat, and sword they carry, has to be carried by their troops, or brought through the mud in carts.

You need to buy yourself time, because the longer this siege goes, the more things will go in your favor. More Elven lives lost, more time for your allies to show up, more time for the Elves to look like weak fools for not being able to take out a single small town, more time for you to gain the sympathy of other factions and garner support.

>>46842662

That has to be the most bullshit thing Ive ever seen in cinema I love it.

>>46840826

I would also recommend going and finding sauce on some historical seiges. This will add credibility to your side, and will help convince the dm to play it straight. On that note, as on as the dm isn't entirely bewitched by her I think you have good odds. Seiges are nasty things for the aggressors, and I really dont feel she has enough troops to see it through if you play this right.

>>46843005

Sorry typo, if, if the dm isn't entirely bewitched. Though looking through it seems he may be.

>>46843005
So I should put emphasis on the mundane/historical aspect of the siege, instead of the magical/fantasy aspect,

Also for the mobility, I realized that if the Elves should manage to breach the walls, if I barricated the main way they will find themself in the Poor quarter, a bunch of little alleys, decrepit houses, home to gangs and criminals and smugglers of all sort. Easy to block and divide their forces.

I think I should ask my contacts to form a truce between gangs and try to get a map of the alleys from the smugglers, even to find if there is some entrance that I don't know about,

>>46843368
You need to focus on the mundane aspect just to lock them out that way. You still need to pay attention to the magical aspect, though as a high-level wizard that should be easier.

Abandon the town
Make a show of it. Skirmish/ Gorrila in the mistheir Warfare etc etc
Let them walk in and occupy it
Blow it up

>>46843368

Well the way I figure it it seems like she hasn't really though this through at all
Based on what i have read, especially that whole "cant believe your resisting" bit, she seems to think she will just easily roll over you. She wont have thought this out, she just going to show up and say, we knock down the walls and my elf army is awesome. Fight back with well researched proof of your preperations, crush her entitled ass. Make her realize that even if you are players that doesn't mean you can just ignore logistics and reality. Heroes still need armies, and she probably hasn't give much though to hers, prove her army cant win, litter the ground with knife-ear corpses and listen to the cries of their women. If your well prepared and she isnt, and you can show that you should win, then you will, or the dm will blatantly favor her and then you and the rest of the group can call him out on it. If she doesn't have cannons and you can stop any magic shenanigans she tries she cannot being down your walls. As long as the walls hold you can, and the elves dont have walls so you can make their lives miserable.

>>46842769
Go full hog man. CANISTER SHOT
or failing that some shade of grape shot.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k86XhYS8GJI

>>46843669

The things I'm worried the most is the Death Knight and her Mom, the Elf Sorceress.

I read some notes I made a month ago,

>>The Death knight can command undeads and have a group of undeads under his command, a group of skeletons knights and ghosts and shadows.

>>The SorcerMom has yet to appear, don't know if she is alive.

I don't think they should appear, from what I understood this is her way to prove herself over the humans she despites and acquire slaves and territory for her father.

>>46844044

Grapeshot/cannister shot is a good idea, that is some mean stuff, specially for what I presume to be relatively light infantry

>>46842769
So pretty much make it a lot like WW1 Western Front?

>>46844121
If those two don't even show up, it should be really easy if you just prep for a siege as normal. An arcane archer isn't going to beat a wizard in terms of magical support, so it just comes down if you can take on 2000 elves.

>>46844044
>>46842890

My hometown has three alchemists that sell their wares at the market and an unknown numbers of drug/poison makers that work with the gangs. I can make them work on something..

>>46844155

Oh shit mustard gas. Op you gotta do that, cept dont cause people will hate you for it, and then you will be the bad guy.

>>46844191
Might as well place jars of explosive/poison/acidic liquids around the entire town as landmines.

>>46844182
I'm not the most familiar with the setting, can you enchant some small bits of metal to be more lethal/poisonous? if so they just stuff the lot of it down the cannon barrel for some extra-lethal ad-hoc grapeshot.

>>46844121

I admit the death knight is worry a problem, he is pretty much the only thing I would worry about honestly. Honestly if he takes the field you may have to accept defeat, but dont just roll over, make him flex that necromancer muscle. If he calls up undead, or commits an atrocity of some sort even if you lose the initial battle for the town you can rally other powers against what sounds like the bbeg. Like others said above get the churches on your side for sure. I hope we can save your town, but if he throws an unkillable baddy at you, there isnt much I can suggest. Usually those get beat cause the dm wants you to, if he doesn't your kinda hosed.

Tell the DM that as an ABSOLUTE requirement both players must have a written list of EVERYTHING their army possesses.
You dont have to show the other players, but that list is given to the dm and is not to be touched by the owner ever again.
I did a similar thing last year without the list and the attacker was blatantly making up bullshit to counter my defenses.
"Oh yeah?! Well I had sappers sneak into your base last night!"
Your opponent sounds like the kind of person who would pull the same shit if she started to think she would lose.

This way you can call bull and have the dm check the list.

Well, if shit really hits the fan after all possible preparations, you have a few options:

>Surrender. (though probably being humiliated in the process and having your hometown being occupied) Do not expect Mercy.

>Fighting to the Hilt. This will ultimately make your win condition: "I win because you didn't". Expect lots of death on both sides, allies dropping out of the fight, etc.

>The Samson Option. You know you're fucked, but you're going to take them all out (i.e. planting bombs underneath your town) so NOBODY will have it.

>>46842111
>>46842036
Oh yeah, round up all known thieves, and put them in a secure place. They'll be the most likely to steal food.

>>46844321
Thank you, I completely forgot about this. I have already done my list before for my school and for the administration of my city. I have to ask her to make one as well.

>>46844366

Probably they will be enslaved and used as working force for the elves, unable to flee because of the illusory thing that protects their land.
I think the worst will be reserved for the students, She knows how much effort my character put into the school. If Shit hit the fans, the students will have a way out, with as many people I can

>>46844191
>>46844203

The character is Lawful Evil, He will do everything necessary to protect his city and his people.

>>46840826
You are fucked, basically, not because of the circunstances in-game, but because the DM will turn everything you do against you to help her girl.

You have only one reasonable option left: provoke a situation were both of you die with no way of escaping it.

>>46844613
You know, if your character dies, maybe you can play as the Student that escapes the carnage, and forced to be a leader of a destitute people.

>>46844613

>lawful evil

Oooh sounds like this is an evil campaign, fun. OK op mustard gas, and every other chemical weapon you can think of, kill them all. If they die writhing on the ground as their lungs are destroyed and their skin burns no one will fuck with your town.

>>46842111
>>46844441
>>46844613
Speaking of food. Make sure proper hygiene is practiced because the last thing you need is all of your defenders and civilians to catch a fucking disease.

That means hunting down rats, mice, fleas, and every other vermin; dispose of the dead properly, burn them if you have to; and make a good stock of medicine available.

If you have anyone that knows how to summon a plague of rats to eat the enemy food supplies (some rats would be bold enough to try to eat a person when they're asleep., now's the time to call upon them.

>>46844366
>>46844685
Many people told me this, so I have started to think about it.

For the moment, if I ever come to this,I will booby trap the entire school and wait them in my office for the showdown.

>>46844735

Not really, I started as Lawful Neutral, but as we progressed my character thought that he wasn't strong enough to do the right thing in the right way, and decided that doing the right thing was worth more than using questionable methods.
In fact He see himself as weak and ask his students to be better than him,

>>46842662
warham as fuck

>>46844688
This is a really good idea. Thank you.

>>46844951

I like the character progression. like the character, hope you make it out of this alive. Honestly there is no reason not to unless your determined to go down swinging, which sounds good on paper, but is kinda stupid. Honestly you could just port out with your students if it came down to it. i reckon your school is most important, if you have to sac the town then do it. You can come back for it latter with a larger army enraged by the elves foreign policies and warmongering.

>>46840826
>Also, the elven realm dominated by this Dead Knight has raised an army of 2000 soldiers, despite the population being 2100 in total and they have started to cut down trees to build war machines.

if you can get intel on how many dudes they actually send at you, consider looping around and sacking them while they're not home. you might also be able to convince some semi-neutral party to do this for you if it looks easy enough, simply in the name of opportunism.

also, you may want to consider the possibility of damming/flooding/diverting the river either as an offensive trick or something to prepare for. three kingdoms tells me rivers can fuck shit up.

>>46845186
Problem is that their lands are protected by a strange enchantment. If you're not born in those lands, you cannot go around without losing your way, no save. I have tried different protections, but to no avail.

Even following a straight road we got lost and nearly died. Only the Elf can go around without losing her way.

>>46840826
What is the geography of the town you're defending? Does it have any notable features? Is it on high ground?

Also try to think of where they would most likely assemble their ranks try to attack you.

For example, if your enemy is holed up in a place for camp, you could try to divert the river to flood them.

>>46845279

that is some serious plot armor right there.

>>46845279
Wait a second.... Those are undead soldiers, right?

FORTIFY THE DOCKS. Expect undead Frogmen Commandos to attack from the water.

>>46845279
>you cannot go around without losing your way, no save. I have tried different protections, but to no avail.
That sounds suspiciously like fiat - did you try with an elven prisoner as a guide?

>>46845279
Does it start within the forest or right as you cross the border?

Because if you can at least approach the forest then you might be able to start a nice burn.

ooh i have a good one

build a secondary walling at one of your gates concealed behind a couple of buildings, then convince them to charge through by pretending to have a traitor or feigning surrender. you may also want to apply fire, manholes, or collapse something on them, but unless they pull something extraordinary it should be impossible to fight while surrounded by prepared defenses.

also just in case stock up on drinking water. if they foul it upstream of you bad things could happen.

>>46844951

If thats the case, then keep your students hands clean.

Everything on your hands. Do the terrible weapons of destruction because you do not have the power to protect those under your charge and those who threaten them shall be smote with all the terrible things you can do at the cost of your soul.

>>46845319

naw, i don't think he has to worry bout that, i seriously doubt she has given it enough thought to have come up with that. still, better safe than sorry.

>>46845279
Burn the fucking forest.

>>46845351
At least be certain to post a watch on the docks. Even if there are no undead, you want an alarm in case they try sailing in.

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If the GM is ducking the elf player then you should probably prepare for the elves getting in your city.


Go full vietcong on the whores.
http://www.5rar.asn.au/weapons/boobytraps.htm

If a bunch of malnourished rice farmers can make these then your civilians can too. Every family, every shop owner and every homeless guy living under a tree can make one in their home/shop/tree whatvever (and not get killed by it since you know, they're the ones that placed them). Give those elves nightmares for the rest of their long spanned lives.


Just something to consider aside from all the real siege advice you're getting, 90% of these traps can be made with shit everyone has in their house so you shouldn't lose an amount of materials worth noting.

>>46841694
>The point I was making though is that Elves are too few in number typically and too slow to repopulate that they could allow for tactics like rushing a wall, where the defender has every advantage, the attacker unable to fight back until the wall is taken meaning even the most skilled, strongest, most badass dude is still going to get a spear to the face.

Therefore they would have to just wait you out, but if you can get supply ships in, or stockpile enough they will have to leave eventually.

In saying that, I imagine they would be happy to wait months/years compared to a normal army as their perception of time is different.

But Armies A: dont like not doing things, soldiers cause a lot of issues when not given a goal. B: Armies are a physical projection of a political move. Therefore there will be political opponents who want the army to withdraw for no other reason than they are on the other side of the political fence.

If you cant beat them, get spies or whatever the those elves who have influence and get them to pull out.

>>46845366
Any suggestions for anti-undead traps and weapons for a Lawful Evil person?

What level? Do you have Sunburst, the ultimate siege scale, ultra long range anti undead spell? (its 4d6 vs the living will also kill level 1 NPC flunky types)

>>46845279
you could try a large enough group of people spread out so they're just within vision of the next link. if your force is wide enough it may be impossible to get lost.

obviously common sense is not guaranteed to defeat magic, though.

Symbol spells are the perfect way to destroy/ruin unlimited quantities of enemy troops trying to occupy a city.

Air elementals are also very good at anti troop stuff, they have very good whirlwind anti mook attacks.

>>46845426
Well, you mentioned there was a religion popular in town right? See if any priests might help you out.

Other than that, many mundane weapons are good against undead, but you'll want the guards to know to use the right weapon against the right type of undead (maces vs skeletons rather than arrows, etc.)

Otherwise? Set up lots of waist-high strings covered in chimes and bells over the docks and water.

>>46845283
River Town, Fortified Walls.

We have Two Gates North And East with the Docks on the West side of Town.

The River is large, one of the largest of the world. No Bridges, we can cross it only with ferries.

The Town has 5 quarters,

>>North-West with the Docks are the slums/poor quarter, lots of alleys and territory of criminals and various gangs.

>> South Rich Quarter with the nobles house and my school, great view of the river. but no access to it,

>>South East Waterworks, bathhouse and an old church,

>> Central , the central plaza and shops /warehouses for the merchants

>> East Shops and Houses

The town is a trading hub, moving stuff along the river and from east to west.

The elves will attack from the North, if they break through the North walls, will find themself in the Slums.

>>46845426

Boiling Holy Water

Cross Stakes, slacked with the sticky dried remnants of blessed communion wine.

Jets of holy water.

Impact traps of crushing damage for skeles. Rocks or swinging logs.

>>46840826
OP After reading this thread I've concluded you have a pretty decent shot if you take every reasonable measure.

Show this DM and elf tramp who's boss. /tg/ is with you and please keep us updated!

>>46840826

Well, OP, I think one of the tougher challenges would be facing off against the possible Undead Elements of the enemy.

They don't have to worry about Food, Casualties, Fear, etc. so they have no issues for Morale. Then we have the potential threat of the enemy raising up your own dead forces to add to their army.

Not sure if they're willing to raise undead elves initially, but expect them to do that if they get desperate.

>>46845366

True, very true. you know what, fill the river with a specific pattern of really big stakes, like put a point on a tree trunk, and then make sure only your guys know the safe path. that way if they try to come in by ship, they'll just end up sinking themselves.

>>46845523
Well, I'd imagine that a lot of merchants that would be rather pissed off if their friendly trading town had a change in management. Not to mention any Nobility that relies on you.

>>46845523
Just to be safe, I'd lock down the eastern gate. Well, more specifically, I'd lock down both gates, hardcore. Just put as many bars and stones behind them as you need.

Specifically though, you want to make sure they attack from the North. You don't want them surrounding you unless you outnumber them.

I'd also heavily recommend digging a trench around the wall. make it rather deep.

Then, put a dam on the southern end of the trench, up against the river.

When the elves show up, it'll be completely dry, but rather deep. Their options are to either not cross it, (in which case they're not getting over your walls) or send troops down into it, in which case you signal a horn to break the dam and flood the whole thing.

Alternatively, just make it a moat outright. That'll really hamper most traditional siege engines.

>>46845319
The Death Knight can create undeads, and has control of an honor guard of skeletons knights and ghosts and shadows.

For now I got only reports of elves cutting down trees and making siege machine, but I think I will see some undeads.

>>46845321
>>46845328

I tried different spells, but everytime i got lost. The elves have a camp full of slaves without walls, because if their prisoners try to escape, they will get lost and die.
I thought it was something like illusions and tried different spells and mental protections, but not avail. It seems like a mixture of divination and illusion and enchantment, because it can make you see familiar faces and people and make you follow them.

The forest is north of my city and it is the border of the elven lands

>>46845708
Is the forest along the river, by the way?

>>46845370
fucking Vietcong man. those are some nasty ass traps.

You might also want to consider what you want to do with your non-combatants (i.e. the old, the sick, women, children, those that aren't in the military, etc.) that decide to stay in town.

Because at the beginning, you'll say one thing, but if your numbers dwindle too much, you'll be faced with another choice to send them to the walls.

>>46845818
THIS

>>46845845

Might want to consider evacing the non-combatants. Those that can leave should leave immediately to seek refuge.

>>46845537
Thank you!

I have some difficulties know retracing all the posts, because is so full of good and smart ideas and nobody called me a faggot for the moment. Thank you guys!

>>46845816

Not the elven forest, but there is a mash full of geyser and boiling pools of water but it is still in human lands

>>46845879
We're not because we expect greater faggotry from the girl and the GM.

Might want to consider >>46845873 since if their state goal is slaves, deny them their slaves.

>>46845845
>>46845873
>>46845879
Yeah, sending them across the river to one of your allies might be a good call. Even if someone isn't willing to send you troops, having someone take in your civilians temporarily could still be a valuable use of a political favor. That's less mouths to feed, which makes supplies easier, and you don't have to worry about them during bombardments.

>>46845907
sorry, I meant Marsh

>>46845879
oh woops forgot to do that ahem...
OP is faggot

>>46845879

hey man, we can be decent people sometimes, it just depends on who's on the board at any given moment. Besides this is the kind of discussion we can get into, rather than the kind that is based on opinion and leads to holy wars.

>>46845907
>>46845925
Hmm...I was going to suggest sending ships north and shooting fire at the forest from the shore, but really taking the offensive on them is kind of a bad move.

Wiping out their lands makes you seem like more of a bad guy. Plus they're sending their entire population to fight you anyway, so a loss on their part is going to be devastating regardless.

At best, you should have something in place to cut off their retreat so they don't just go back to the woods and start hassling you. You want them to hunker down, and get set for a long-haul.

>>46845915
>>46845873
>>46845917

You're right. I already evac my students, but didn't think about the others.

I swear we can do something with the old chapel in the town...

Maybe a convert it into an anti-undead hold?

>>46841195
>I'm a generalist wizard lv 14 from D&D 3.5, LE.
Necromancy. In particular, get yourself some incorporeal undead, like Alips and Shadows.

Here's what you do. When the Elf's army arrives, ask the main Elf chick for a negotiarion concerning the possibility of surrender. Use this negotiation to stall.
During the negotiation, command your shadows to stealthily attack the Elf army. The killed elves will themselves become Shadows under your control, and will continue the slaughter!

If you can get some clerics to fight with you put them to work on mass undead defence.

See if you can bless the river and divert it into a moat.

>>46846046
That's nice and well, but I'm more concerned about an amphibious undead assault to take the ports or burn the ships.

>>46846031
Elf's father is a Dark Knight king though. He might be there and jack OP's undead.

>>46846031

But the death knight on the other side could take em.

>>46846031

I'm afraid if the Death Knight shows up, can take control of my undeads and put them aganist me

>>46846046
There are some clerics in town, and I intend to call other churches to raise an Holy Crusade aganist the elves and their Undead King.

>>46846068
Well, an amphibious assault by undead won't be able to burn your ships. They can't tie torches to them or just use flaming skeletons with them going underwater, and undead aren't smart enough to unscrew oil flasks or use tinder or whatever.

That said, use the water from the river, waterworks, and bathhouses, and fill tons of barrels of water all over town with buckets nearby. If any fire breaks out, you'll have the water you need to put it out quickly.

I'd suggest putting up some mundane alarms that will trip up undead but normal people could more easily pass through.

OP, if you are still reading, I suggest the following:

You said your last resort was to boobytrap the school and wait for them in a showdown to take them with you. Bravo! That's a great idea! Two serious points you should note, though:

1. Make sure it will kill them. Throw everything you can into that last thing. Go out with a bang. Don't let them have a chance to survive.

2. Write all of your preparations down, seal it in an envelope. Write: Plan B or some shit on the outside. This is so that not even the DM knows what you have planned in the end.

Why the secrecy? Because he's banging the girl. That blurs the lines. He might let slip what you have planned to save his girl's character if he knows.

With a sealed envelope, you know that neither of them will see it coming. This, combined with having an exhaustive list of what both sides are capable of in the open, will allow you to keep your final FUCK YOU intact.

>>46846068
>>46846046
>>46846088

Then again, we're sorta screwed if the King decides to not send his Undead Army to fight, but to manage logistics.

Imagine it, an undead workforce that doesn't need to rest, can work all day everyday without food.

Their siege weapons will be built much faster, they won't lose anyone if bandits attack undead carrying barrels and crates, and they're much more expendable than an elf.

>>46846068
Undead aren't an issue if the whole river is holywater

>>46846155
I forgot to mention, give the Plan B envelope to the DM along with your order of battle (army composition) so it doesn't look like you made it up. Emphasize that it should only be opened when you say, not before.

>>46846162
Couldn't he just catapult some barrels of holy water at the undead?
capcha bodies of water, the fates are with you op!

>>46846155
You know, if you want to go the edgy route, instead of killing, how about maiming or disfiguring for life?

>>46846207
Catapulting....Catapulting Undead at the walls...

>>46846224
Yeah be wary of undead ammunition spreading disease and shit.

>>46845879
Hatred for Mary Sue Bullshit and DM'S screwing over their other players for their girlfriends has united us in aiding your cause. It's not that we like you, bit that we hate your DM and the chick.

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>>46846088
>Dark Knight

What if we can make him rise?

>>46846224
But... a final stand where you take your enemies with you is like the opposite of edgy. Literally a plot element older than written stories.

>>46846162
I don't feel like she's clever enough for that. When you have an Undead king who can raise undead, the typical thing to do is to have an undead horde, not set them to building crap.

Plus if they're using them to transport stuff, that makes ambushes super easy. Ambushing elven convoys would be rather difficult thanks to their keen senses.

Undead are retarded, and depending on their orders will either continue carrying the goods and ignore the ambush since they haven't been instructed otherwise, or immediately drop what they're carrying and try to attack.

>>46846155

In case it should go to that , I will do as you say.

By the way, If I go down, I need a way to save the students that decided to remain and the other survivors.

How about if I strike a deal with the smuggler to show me their ways out the city across the river? They should be able to get some people to safety unnoticed.
For the students, I kept a scroll of teleport.

Even if the city is destroyed, the survivors will go on

>>46846272
I have nothing against outright killing her, but personally, I personally wanted a reverse Fingolfin situation with the whole mortally wounding stuff.

>>46846324
How many non-combatants do you think you can evacuate? Personally, I'd just try to get a bunch of ships and have them sail to an ally. Give them a small detachment of soldiers to protect them, and have a few older students on board to establish leadership positions when the soldiers inevitably die due to the plot, and character development purposes.

Just outright tell the GM if he is going to wipe the town off he map within ten rounds due to all the elves being level 8+ master swordsmen and level 9+ wizards.

>>46846324
>>46846422
Oh yeah, almost forgot to ask, if you decide to blow up the whole town and/or school, how badly do you want to salt the earth.

This is sort of important if your successors decide to take back their home.

OP, prepare the defense of the city and prepare to have your friend betray you for the sake of the woman he imagines is his girlfriend. Just be ready mentally when he sides with her over you. It sounds like you and another player have tried talking to him before. Talk to the other player about all possible outcomes. Having a group split up over this sort of thing is sadly common and talking can help reduce it.

If you do plan to make your final stand sitting in your Academy Headmaster Chair, have you most loyal bard play some fitting calm music, tell them it was an honour to listen to them, and order them to escape in a little rowboat you left behind (or secret tunnel).

>>46846324
Perfect. Even if the Mary Sue survives (and let's not kid ourselves, she's not likely to bite the dust with the DM having his sex life on the line), denying her from getting any satisfaction from her victory will be just as good. Make her triumph hollow, with her people decimated and nothing to show for it but an empty city and a lot of new enemies.

>>46846276
From what I know of the Death Knight, He has been described as an arrogant sob, he creates undead, but things like ghosts and shadows.
I think He would send powerful undeads, not hordes.
Now that I think about it, that is the enchantment of His land. His land creates ghost, ghost of your past to made you lose yourself.

>>46846422
I have 5 students left, they refused to leave me and they want to fight, all trained in firearms, crossbow and simple weapons. One of them is a Lv 1 Sorcerer and he is the head student.
I also have the Weapon master, and old veteran soldier who trained the students.

The entire town is about 2000 - 2500 people (More people than the entire elven kingdom). What are the % of non combatants in this case?

>>46846510
I don't think I have the right to blow up the town. It was my town, I helped it prosper but It's not mine to destroy.

The school on the other hand is mine, I want to salt the earth and make people rembember centuries after the siege.

>>46846556
I'm not really angry about it. I've done my share of stupid things to impress girls

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>>46846324

OP, here something I came up with for a quest quite awhile ago.

A modified Catapult with a barrel cut in half and hinged instead of a basket.

The basic delivery mechanism is a barrel fitted to be able to split open like a jaw and filled to the brim with nasty metal stuff.

The barrel is attached to a length of rope and this rope is wound around it. The other end is then tied to the catapult and the barrel to rest on its delivery basket.

The whole idea behind this system is to be able to rapidly seed a large area with a good number of maiming devices away from the city walls without endangering soldiers.

This can easily be used right before an incoming assault, leaving the enemy with no time to de-mine or bring up protective footwear without first retreating. The shit can also be flung into the faces of approaching troops with quite devastating effect.

It is also, very simple to manufacture.

>>46846738
put something angry or sick in the middle of it and then we have something even better

>>46845917
Guessing dm will give them to her on a silver platter if they aren't teleported or something

>>46846795

Angry Holy Water Element

Long ranged Anti-Undead Delivery system.

>>46846717
Well, if it's ghosts and shades, you'll definitly need the help of a priest, as otherwise they'll just slip right through the walls.

You need to somehow Hallow the town so they won't be able to enter it, otherwise the siege is mostly pointless, unless you yourself can summon up enough things to fight them off, which is doubtful.

As for non-combatants, it depends on the exact population, but you're looking at roughly 1/4 of it being children and elderly, with the remaining 3/4 being split between adult men and women. Assuming all the men fight and some of the women volunteer to help out, you'd be looking at close to 800 soldiers, with maybe a few hundred support staff from any women who choose to stay, mostly those who have husbands, but not children to accompany in the evacuation.

That's not great odds, but wars have been won and lost on larger gaps.

>>46846809
Send them south along the river. The elves are coming from the north, and the forest doesn't border the river. They also won't even be there until 2 weeks.

There's no feasible way they could possibly go after them, and if they do, they risk outright attacking your allies, or splitting up their force, which will ultimately make the siege easier, and paint the elves and their king as 'those idiot dickheads who sent half of their army to murder civilians while the other half lost the actual fight'.

You better have a simple, but good speech if you plan to blow up the school, OP.

Mention how much you loved the town, but cannot be forced to destroy it, almost as if you were incapable of blowing it up in smithereens.
How this school was built, funded, and run by you, how you saw students run in and out everyday to their classes and homes. Then look down and say that by the end of the day, if you continue fighting, you'll have nothing left behind.

No legacy, no successor, nothing to make your mark upon the world.

The school will eventually topple to the ground by time, or neglect, people will forget your name, and that you wanted at least one thing left that says "I WAS HERE."

And those are your students, and your people who are now far, far away from here.

They will be your mark upon the world, not the school, and not the town.

They will remember the many lives lost, and they will return.

>>46846717
>I don't think I have the right to blow up the town. It was my town, I helped it prosper but It's not mine to destroy.
The town is already destroyed if she wins. The people would either be homeless refugees or slaves trapped in a forest with no escape. You're not taking anything from them, you're making the Elves pay for it in blood.
Also, remember that if things get truly desperate with no way out, the % of combatants becomes 100%. Arm the children, the elderly and the crippled; if this doesn't shock the knife - ears into backing down, it gives them a chance to go down fighting. Remember that the alternative is spending the rest of their lives ad slaves with no status, no way of contacting friends or family, no chance of escape, and no future other than as manual labor treated like cattle. Many would rather die than face that fate.
Remember Tsun Tzu's teachings about "death ground": if your soldiers have no Avenue of escape, where their only options are to fight or die, then they will fight as lions, and the day will be yours. Or something to that effect.

Lets talk contingencies.

What is the ultimate final nuke he can put down?

Both prepared in advance and on the day.

>>46840826
Control weather tornado.

Bonus if you make the nearby water source blessed and it hits the undead army.

Some of your students are evacuating right?

Can't they help set up a teleport circle at one of the other cities?

>>46847028
Also some symbols of stunning, Golems, Elementals and Cloudkill to really fuck over the weaker Elves.

>>46847023
Well, I guess it depends on the layout of the school he built.

I'd put a good majority of alchemical, chemical, and explosive weapons underneath the school where the foundation is, then maybe store a few extra in the walls, and the ceiling.

Hell, if we're really desperate, then maybe we could do something Demonic...

>>46846959
I don't know who you are Anon, but you understood my Character completely.

My character maybe be Lawful Evil, may have done some questionable things but he really cared about his school and his students. And

He knows that they will be better than him, after all of this.

Thank you.

Being a rude person I will also add

>> "By the way, I'm not a teacher. I'm the Fucking Headmaster"

>>46847030

5 are staying, the only one with class levels is a lv1 Sorcerer.

>>46847072

5 classrooms, a greenhouse, private rooms for the students, alchemical lab, library, basement, traning hall, headmaster office.

>>46847171
>Thank you.

And as the final bomb blows up the school as a gigantic middle finger of explosions, your character realizes they were merely a the mentor figure of the true main character.

You then take control of the Level 1 Wizard who's on the boat and sees the massive explosion that tears apart his academy.

>>46847278

this, we need more of this.

>>46847171
>>46846959
>>46847278
To revise part of the speech at the very end:

"They will return, and they will remember the many lives lost, the time they had to leave their homes, and the time they sailed towards an unknown future.....

But above all else...

They will remember THIS."

And that's when you blow it all up.

The students and refugees are all huddled together, and see the massive magical, alchemical explosion, which also was enchanted to give out one last message:

"[OP INSERT SUITABLE MESSAGE FOR THE ENEMY OR YOUR STUDENTS]"

>>46840826
If all else fails go nibble some elven ears, to diffuse the situation.

>>46840826
What I did when my party was in this kind of situation (massive empire waging proxy war on our kingdom) was send agents out into every well within 100 miles of our borders and infect them with Blinding Sickness. It states that it transmits via water, and should permanently blind about 1/3 of invading troops. Not only that, but it has an incubation period of 1d3 days, so most of their army should have had a dose of the water before they realise that it's contaminated.
The DM was a bit upset that we'd managed to counter the invading army with biological warfare, but he was pretty cool, and rolled with the punches when we consistently fucked up his plans.

My dirty tricks:

- What is upstream of the elf civilization? Can you pollute the elf's
water supply with shit/rotting meat/poison?

- Hire syphilitic prostitutes to spread disease among the soldiers in
the enemy camp.

- Smear the blade of your sword in shit/rotting meat/poison

- Use firecrackers and smoke bombs to deafen, confuse and disorient
enemies (especially spellcasters)

- Spread flour around to locate invisible enemies

- Use Unseen Servants to carry cover around for your army

>>46847754
He was also a bit annoyed that we'd caused a pandemic of Blinding Sickness using the Contagion spell mere weeks before our kingdom was scheduled to flee across the ocean.

>>46840826
A minor idea I had that I didn't see mentioned here. Gather as many rats as you can, but keep them alive. When the siege begins in proper get a group of people to unleash hundreds, if not thousands of hungry rats open your enemy. An army marches on its stomach and a swarm of rodents is hell on supply.

Every read "All Quite on the Western Front"? Book is about the great war from a German guy that lived it. Part of the book they go on about the rats. One of the guys friends put his bread in a tarp and slept on top of it, but by morning a rat would have dug under him and stolen it. Eventually he takes some string and ties his bread up so it's hanging a meter above the ground and in the middle of the night he found a rat dangling on his bread.

TL;DR Rats will fuck up a supply line so use them.

Ok OP I think we've done all we can.

Take notes, study them well.

Godspeed.

A bit late, but do you have greater details to the composition?

How many spellcasters, archers, and fighters do you estimate? What sort of magic do they have access to?

>>46840826
Good luck, prepare well.

No matter how long the siege takes, use propaganda to bait your allies, and do anything and everything you possibly can to combat disease including educating the town about waste and cleanliness. Keep it a mundane hellhole that her 2000 under prepared army has to wade through and push them back.

Write back soon, keep us posted and keep the walls manned.

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You better keep us posted, OP.

I'm too invested in this now to just give up and forget.

>>46849109
OP here, fallen asleep.
Don't know yet, I just know there will be elves and maybe some undeads, I expect archers in great numbers and mostly light infantry.

If things get serious, I will be facing a Death Knight and his undead army, magic users and otner unpleasantess.

>>46850118
Thank you, I will do my best.

Thank to all /tg/ for your help and your support. I read every single post and would like to thank you one by one, but I can't.

I will do my best.

>>46842769
>She is just venting some steam and he follows her like a puppy out of the game. Me and the sorcerer's tried to talk with him but didn't work.
Woman confirmed succubus, DM confirmed cultist and in direct violation of the bro code.

Commence smiting.

OP, can you very ahold of some druids? They can cast summon food & summon water or something of the like and feed a ton of people.
Also, make sure to ask the churches to pray for their Paladins to show up. If a paladin doesn't arrive at your gates the night before the seige, drenched, bedraggled, and claiming the Gods told him this was where he needed to be, then the DM has boned you right proper.
When is your session coming? I need to know how this turns out.

>>46852548
Jesus it's late.
*get ahold of some Druids

>>46852548
The next session is today, 3 hours from now. I will try to write what is going to happen between breaks and at the end of the session.

>>46847001
Lead your soldiers to a position where there is no retreat, and they will prefer death to flight.

>>46852673
Do you have horsemen or other fast skirmishers? If so it may be wise to let them leave the city and camp a way away.

It's then a simple matter of giving them a signal and having them harass the enemy. I would keep them away from the host, but ambushes for scouts and supply lines can be really useful.

>>46840826

> because the GM is currently banging the elf player, and he is deeply in love with her.
Game over man. Game over. The best you can do is burn everything down, kill everyone of your citizens and put deadly traps and curses in a ten mile radius.

>>46852784
This, I wanna say Adrianople was a famous battle where the Roman army got suckered into attacking a Gothic camp before they realized that their cavalry was grazing like a mile away, and then got completely rode over.

>>46852673
Please do - I'm sure we'd all love to know the reaction's of the DM and the Elf Player, and the result of the siege if it concludes - just remember to have both sides tally all their assets (ALL their assets, no ass-pulls from the DM) before you get into it

>>46840826
If you must die, do so as a martyr. Become a symbol of resistence, of enlightenment, of liberty. When your students spread your ideas, your technology, you will have created an understanding of a threat to the very being of every free man. Drive it into her fucking skull that free man do not surrender, even on pain of death.

Also, burn your side's corpses. Make it religious if you must. Make sure that your own people won't be forced into roles as undead slaves.

Good luck OP, report back asap

I guess we could bump with random shit in the meantime?

Op here, We are going to take a break in half an hour and I'm going to wrote a lot of stuff, be prepared.

In the spoiler text I put the short version

TLDR Party decided to not intervene directly, got a squad of mercenary siege masters dwarves, a LG Deity stepped in to prevent the Cleric from joining my side, prepared a war room, one of mine students has been kidnapped and nailed to one of the elven siege machines, got so angry I started trasforming in a dragon

>>46855270
>LG Deity stepped in to prevent the Cleric from joining my side,

The Lawful Good Deity of slavery, because that's all that coming out of this decision otherwise.

>got so angry I started trasforming in a dragon

Shit nigga, if you had that ability you should have told us.

Just read the thread. Beautiful ideas all around. Because this is a game and not real, I'd be very surprised if things ended mundane. Even if you prepare above and beyond, the only way you win is by neutralizing the threat. The dm is going to bring this to a climax, not let it fizzle out. To win, you have to be willing to lose everything. Don't throw your life away, but if it comes to sealed envelope plan B, and you know you are going to die, I'd suggest something more magically permanent than just blowing the town. If you have the time for magical ritual, you could try binding yourself via self sacrifice bullshit magic ritual to the hometown, or better yet, to the elf lady you're fighting. If you can't win, it's usually no fun to run a fight in which both characters are wiped, so expect her to live. The ultimate revenge comes in when you tie your character into a short range magical force of nature that either torments or traps the invaders.

The best case, worst case, seneraio is to make it an immediate pyrrhic victory that disables, or if you're feeling generous, allows aliment change/redemption for the elf lady.

I realize my advice is probably too late, but goodluck, godspeed, and remember to keep it fun, otherwise you've lost before you've started.

>>46855270
>LG Deity stepped in to prevent the Cleric

Death knight will be using undead, 100%

>>46855270
Did the sorc join your opponent? Judging by your body, I'm guessing not.

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>>46855270
I missed being able to help prep, but I'm eagerly waiting for the updates.
Do us proud teach.

>>46855270
>a LG Deity stepped in to prevent the Cleric from joining my side

Thats fucking bullshit.

How did the player react. Because a LG deity telling his cleric to not defend innocents is fucking ridiculous. Some folks i've played with would have fallen right there and then.

>>46855270
>one of mine students has been kidnapped and nailed to one of the elven siege machines, got so angry I started trasforming in a dragon

No mercy. REMOV ELVES.

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REMOVE ELF!

CALL DM FROM HIS BS!

Ok, I will start with the basic stuff

>>The Party

I was hoping that the Cleric would have joined me, but he said to me that his LG God appeared to him and told to not pick sides in this battle, because both parties were evil to the core and whoerver comes out of this, will be weak enough to be wiped out. He intend to follow his God will, even if He doesn't understand it.

I manage to make him promise that at least he will protect my refuges during the evac.

The sorcerer will not join me because the Elf is pregnant with his child. He will protect the Child but after he is born he will take her down.

The rest of the party will help me with supplies, but not with armed combat.

>> Supplies And Allies

The students I sent home have started rallying the people and resources to help me with the Siege. With the first supply ferry I recived lot of letters from them and lots of money to hire mercenaries.

In particular One student became the matriarch of her important noble family, after her eldest douche brother died of "natural causes". She had to cancel her arranged wedding and started talking to the nobility into taking action and send help.

The Churches have started talking proclaiming this a Holy Crusade, but not much else.

With the Money and Supplies, I got a merc squad of dwarves, all experts in manning siege machines. I also manage to hire some dudes who fight with greatswords.

I manage to get the various criminals to work with me (And got a gang tattoo out of it) and I managed to get a complete map of the underground system of my town. I also was able to talk with some smugglers to have boats ready for refuges and wounded people.

Without the Higher ranks I had to step in and take control. I put my students here and there to help with the evac and with organizing the city.

>F5ing like a motherfucker right now
OP hurry up we need to know

>>46856009
What spells do you have prepared/Spells you know?

>>46856009
Cont.

My first screw up was with the militia.

Not having the cleric leading the army, I asked the veteran soldier to step in and lead. I'm a wizard, don't know anything about this stuff, the guy is a veteran, had trained my students.

Problem is...He lied to me.

He was a soldier. He is a Badass. He was also an officer and lead men to victory. He was a veteran of the siege that my city suffered before i was born.

But he was on the enemy side.

And I discovered it when he went to talk to the troops, one of the older soldiers recognized him and nearly started a riot.

I asked my Dm how bad was the situation, and he told me that it was like I asked a bunch of Israeli soldiers to be lead by Erwin Rommel.

I managed to work it out, but things are tense.

>>46856145

I also prepared a war room to discuss plans with the criminal leader, the veteran, my students and the priest of the town. It's underground and i manage to cover the walls with lead. I also worked to clean the tunnels and some rooms in case we need to bring the refuges and the wounded underground.

As for the weapons, I made the alchemists and the drug makers work without pause creating stuff to be launched, toxic stuff in particular.

I secured the supplies, put water barrels everywhere in order to stop fires.

I also give the order to make (I forgot the word) sort of wooden panels that can be deployed as protection aganist the arrows, like an anon said.

>>46856296
I forgot, I also transformed the area around the woods in a muddy mess to stop the siege machines from aproaching.

I didn't find any druids, or paladins to help with undeads apart from the priest of the town.

After that and other supplies delivered by ferry, The siege started

>>46856366

The first day went as we expected, more or less. From what I saw, they fight with two weapons, no shield and use a bow.

No undeads, the elves attacked with volleys of arrows. Unfortunatly their arrows were too strong for the wooden panels and went through, killing and wounding soldiers.

On the bright side I managed to fireball a lot of them, especially when they got stuck in the mud. We also managed to destroy some of their siege machines.

We took some casualties, I used wind wall to deflect other volleys and the elves retreat. Elf player was shocked when no one of her soldiers manage to climb the walls.

They attacked also during the night, because elves don't need sleep according to her, but we repelled them.
My students fought well, one of them took care of the wounded and ended up taking care of the hospital. During the night she disapperad without a trace.

The next day the elves brought another group of siege machines to help them climb the walls. On one of them, there was my student, still alived nailed to the front.

>>46856296
I also give the order to make (I forgot the word) sort of wooden panels that can be deployed as protection aganist the arrows, like an anon said.
They're called pavises.

>>46856524
>The next day the elves brought another group of siege machines to help them climb the walls. On one of them, there was my student, still alived nailed to the front.

>LG god and cleric still out of this
What the fuck is this shit.

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>>46856524
>Arrows getting through pavises!
Unless all bows are magic they are literally Ygritte stronk elfs.

Also did the wind wall bounced arrows inflict casualties on them?

Call the DM on bullshit

>>46856524
>>46856552

>Arrows punch straight through pavises

Something is telling me none of these siege rules will matter

>>46856524
Do you have any archers of your own? Because arrows will shit all over infantry without shields.

OP, it sounds like things are heading south, are you setting up your last gambit?

>>46856524
Browsing through the 3.5e spellbook, since you said midlevel i'm assuming 6th level spells.
Geas is an option, 6th level divination, no save, any HD.
It may be worth it to give your students some sort of alerting things, Summon monster/Mage's faithful hound body guard them, its clear that shes playing dirty on them, you know their targets, defend them.
She's immune to illusions, her army is not. Throw some fucking illusions.
Invisibility is hilarious, unless her army is so fucking broken they can see invisible, a skirmish harass party with invisibility is terrifying.

Remember, you're a wizard, fight smart. I believe you in OP.

>>46856524
basically they made clear that they tortured her, broke her legs and then nailed her to dare me to attack them.

I hate myself for that and went for a mercy kill.
After that, I turned to my other students and said "I'm becoming a Monster today. You should keep your hands clean".

I spent every spell and made them retreat about midday.
The Dm smiled and told me that i started feeling a need to scratch my skin.
I retired myself to check, and discovered that blue scales with orange marking (like a coral snake) started growing on my skin, in random patches.

He told me that I indulged in the sin of Wrath and that was the start of my transformation in a half dragon.

If any of the churches discover this, I can say goodbye to their support.

>>46856659
All set up.

>LG god telling his cleric to not help a town full of innocents under siege.
>Arrows going through pavises.
>Elves don't need to sleep.
>Student getting ninja kidnapped with a fiat.
Keep a list OP, and call the GM out on his bullshit once this is all over.

>>46856740
why is OP considered a bad guy when he's just trying to defend against an elven warmonger and her deathlord father

>>46856739
I doubt the church will give you any help anyways, or they will conveniently not show until youre a dragon. Fuck them.
>>46856772
His alignment is LE, therefore hes worse than elves.

>>46856739
Half-Dragon, you say? That could potentially lead to some unique ingredients if you're willing to scrape off some scales, or if your blood changes to be more draconic. Dragonbreath is one hell of a bitch.

>>46856772
Because GMGF.

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>>46856739

W.O.W.

What. Exactly did you indulge.

Because if thats what makes a dragon. Fuck me, theres alot of dragons in this world.

It's not like you're catching one and slowly roasting an elf over a fire.

This is fucking bullshit. Sure as fuck the female player knows this and this is only to make sure the church doesn't intervene.

Your student was helping the wounded, got kidnapped, and nailed to a seige? The gods are still out of this? You need a new GM. What the fuck kind of shit is this? Also, having a handful of ground up glass within reach for your rogue friends to toss in her eyes when she gets to your war room may help.

>>46856739
Uf she doesn't get some kind of scales for Wrath, Greed, or Pride imma be pissed and this isn't my game

>>46856740
Don't forget turning into a rage monster over calm-calculated evil decisions. If all it took was fighting a war for your hometown, half the planet would be dragons.

>>46856862
All the elves that nailed her to the siege engines should be dragons by now.

>>46856893
The fucking player elf should be a dragon for deciding to invade over a failed contraceptive potion

>>46856772
My Character is Lawful Evil. He belives in doing the right thing, but he thinks that he is too weak to get doing it in the right way and used questinable methods.

I blackmailed, murdered and tortured people to help the party, must of the time hidden from them in order to keep their hands clean.
I always tried to keep things professional and proportionate to my defense.

>>46856739

Your GM sucks, sorry bud.

>>46856914
were you doing it for a good cause also why hasn't the elf turned into a fucking dragon her siege against innocent people should have turned her pretty fucking quick if you giving a mercy kill to one of your comrades started your change

>>46856914
Well, if you start losing too many skirmishes, and men, expect your mercenaries to pull out because they're not paid enough to fight for the losing side.

>>46856929
This anon is absolutely correct

>>46856739
Dispute the dragoning, that's complete bullshit on the DMs part. Argue that in that case, the girl should be just as bad for attacking an innocent town.

>>46856929

/thread

>>46856914
This >>46856963

You're keeping things cool and professional. You're evil, but you're not some incarnation of wrath

The elf is getting huffy when she doesn't win a siege in one day, and decided to torture people for fun.

>>46856963
It wasn't for the mercy kill, but for what I have done to the elves after the mercy killing. Poison clouds, all sort of nasty stuff.

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>>46856739
So defending your city is turning you into a dragon?

What about the people who broke your student's legs for sport before crucifying her?

Dude wtf?

>>46856987
I'd definitely ask him to list off all the events that he thinks caused your wrath transformation.

Then turn it around once he's done and list off all the things the elf did that were way worse than that.

You need to clarify your actions and motives behind them.

>I desperately lob another fireball at them in hopes of protecting my students
>gandalf and merry scene from RoT
>Wake up early and help move some water to where the infantry are stationed and make samll talk about how you grew up here.
>I've never had a lot but here I knew I had a place to lay my head.
>As you're walking across a small bridge comment how you used to hide under it during hide and seek.

You're still human. Drive that point home. This is your home turf, and you have a higher duty to protect it.
Remember, Fear is the small death that brings total obliteration

>>46856914
Well, OP, if you somehow pull off your last gambit, I think the town deserves to have its new flag change to have a dragon emblazoned in the middle.

>>46857057
I second this. Call him out on his bullshit.

>>46857035
>Poison clouds are wrathful

It's a WAR.

EVERYTHING is wrathful

Just because you broke some 'unspoken' rules of honor on the battlefield doesn't make you wrathful.

If anything, it's the only thing that makes sense, since you're not a military commander or a general. You're a scholar protecting a small village.

Using knowledge to win a battle against a larger military force as a small civilian unit isn't angry, it's smart.

>>46857035
but they were committing torture for being upset they lost part of a siege they started because of a vain and ruthless elf's ego whos father is a DeathLord and why isn't the LG cleric helping you when your only evil is helping your party and town how are those large scale evils he turns his back on you your just doing what it takes to defend yourself from unlawful agression

>>46857035
>Poison clouds, nasty stuff

You mean like tying prisoners to the front of war machines? Because those are both breaking the Geneva convention (while I don't think it exists in your world, the GM is probably going by parts of it for what's 'evil')

I'm going to eat something and then we will start playing again.

Thanks /tg/, At least I know I'm not crazy.

I will try to post in and between turns to keep you informed

>>46857035
Its fucking war. Their stated goal has been the death or enslavement of anyone who dwelled in the city.

You're literally in the last ditch here. WHY WOULD YOU NOT BE PULLING PUNCHES.

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>>46857035
>Poison clouds worse than having innocent people be enslaved, killed, and/or tortured like your students
its not like youre wall of stone-ing some of the elf army in and acid foging them while they cant get out.
Youre fucking throwing poison clouds against invaders that are unrightfully attacking you, that are torturing innocent people that aren't part of this.

>>46857164
seriously argue some of this with the Group because your getting screwed over

>>46857035
Well, call out the DM by saying that if you don't defend the town, the elves will just do what every army at the time does to the losing side: Rape, Pillage, and Burn things

>>46857164

Do you lose your mind completely when you become a dragon?

Because if you do actually become one and are still the same person inside.

GO BURN ELF FOREST.

>>46857164
Nah, don't bother doing that. Focus on you. Try and play up >>46857089 to make you more sympathetic and get the DM to see you're just trying to help these people.

Confront him about some of the stuff later, and give us the details after then.

>>46857168

V2 is justified for this.

ELF GENOCIDE TIME.

God I hope OP brings the elven population to a functionally extinct number.

>>46857164
This>>46857202

Make sure you put in a lot of effort in helping out the non-combatants evacuate, or providing them food, medicine, and proper hygiene.

>>46856739

Also, you have 7th level spells right? Get the remains back, I'm sure this isnt hard with the number of things you can summon that can invis at will, then use limited wish to reincarnate her, or guilt the cleric in to using resurrection.

This will allow you to find out exactly how they got in, and put a stop to that, because they can apparently get in and out easily if they pulled that off.

>>46857140
It sounds like the GM is only applying what he wants. We can all yell THIS GM SUCKS all we want but OP is going to play this out till the end.

So what are some last stands we can come up with? I say full transformation and to fight as a dragon is certain death away. How long till you go down guns blazing?

>>46857259

Long enough. Elves be shit.

Also if you capture one and roast him till he half dead, it can be a compass to the Elven homelands.

>>46856739
The elf will "happen" to have a dragon-slaying weapon. Remember my words.

>>46857248

Very good point, but retrieving the body may be difficult. though im just going to point out if they could get in to grab the girl, they could have got in to poison people or open the gate or do all kinds of shit. its just dm fiat really.

>>46857298

on that note check your food and water supplies to make sure they aren't contaminated...or don't because then you'll be giving the dm and his bitch ideas.

>>46857298
Don't point out that they could have done that until the siege is over. Don't want to give them ideas.

Once it is over though, that'll be a great example to point out to the group of how the GM was just fucking around with it and nothing mattered.

>>46857276
Oh shit, this could happen

OP, remember your defensive spells like wind wall and displacement.

Also I'm sure you won't do anything rash, but being as abrasive with the DM as the people in this thread won't help, if you feel screwed over it would be best to phrase any points of disagreement gently.

Just started, strange things are happening

A group of paladins arrived by boat to fight the elven army for me, they are the same faith of the cleric.

Wtf?

>>46857410
Use as many illusion spells as you can to hide your dragon scales.

>>46857337

seriously though getting agents inside is the holy grail seiges (am i using that right?), point being if you do you have way better odds of winning assuming you don't just win there. the fact that they wasted that just to grab a student and piss you off, is stupid, and would be hilarious if it wasn't so dam aggravating. Also, im just gonna say, called it, elf bitch never actually planned for a siege just though she would win by default. man i wish i could have seen her face. Go op, you can do it, even if you lose in the end you've won by sticking it to her. rub it in her face.

>>46857410

Exclerics maybe.

"If we must stand and watch innocents die, I'd rather fall."

>>46857424

That and wear full armour.

>>46857410


Yeah, be wary of this all being a set up to them killing you for being a dragon.

>>46857433
This.

Even if you lose, even if everything goes wrong, be sure to congratulate the elf chick afterwards for barely managing to take a town of 1000 civilians with an army of 2000 elves.

>>46857410
they realized your not that bad and have come to do what's right and what's right is putting down the elf

>>46857410
He's putting fanatical holy warriors next to you after you've started a dragon transformation. Be very careful.

>>46857410

....this dm is daft, on that note as long as you hide the dragon (assuming he will let you) this is good.

>>46857424

like this guy said.


dm is of course planning to dick you over by having them find out then betray you from inside the walls. you must prevent this.

>>46857488
Yeah, wear heavy robes, stay as far away from them as possible.

Hell, use invisibility. If they ask, say it's to prevent yourself from getting sniped by Elves.

>>46857410
Normally I wouldn't worry about paladins betraying you, but as you are evil deception may be "necessary" to deal with you.
Best have them defend the innocents, the hospital, things that they can't really say no to.

And you might want to spy on them a little, if you think your spy won't be caught

Also, where's the rest of the party, physically?

>>46857410

>>46856807
>>46856807

>>46857410
>>46857035
>>46856739
Oh, how did the Samson Option type plans go, btw?

>>46857410
You'll also need to make sure to mask your alignment somehow. Or have one of your students deal with them in your stead.

These paladins are probably lawful stupid smite-bots, so just throw them at the elves as fast as you can.

>>46857410

If you do get found out though, come clean, do a sob story, then as the kicker, Geas yourself in front of them, show without a doubt that you will stand for justice to be done upon you when this siege is done.

You already have a spell that removes Geas, do not bring this up when making the bluff.

My character has nearly ripped out one of his eyes after a really vivid nightmare.

Paladins have started to helping people, being bros. Told them about the cleric, told me that he must be crazy.

>>46857410
>>46857581
Keep in mind that the Elf PC has proven herself both an inept commander and a terrible glutton of Elven lives in an attempt to gain petty revenge. Divine-right or not, people get real sick of being used like toys, especially when they're dying in the equivalent of droves.

>>46857559

Before OP get found out, they need to be introduced to the body of the poor girl who was stolen from them and tortured and nailed alive.

this thread is making me hate elves even more than normal

>>46857581
Just let them do whatever, then avoid them as much as possible.

Have a disguise spell on just to be safe, but just let them do as they see fit to help. Don't make demands or draw attention to yourself.

If they do find you out, >>46857559 and >>46857610

>>46857581

Are.

Are the other players actually sitting around watching this?

>>46857629
I'd assume this is some sort of online or otherwise nation-building game, where everyone is off doing their own thing.

>>46857581

That seems ill advised, eye patches are cool but there are easier ways.

Also, obvious point, but have you talked to your cleric ever since the paladins showed up? Maybe get him back on side, then use him to resurrect the student as a PR stunt.

>>46857581
>>46857609
Yeah, this - you could really do with some voices in the elven camp. Are they the sort of elves (people-like) that would by supplies from "merchants" who are totally not your criminals?

Didn't you say this is the first time in ages that Daddy Death Lord (who killed their queen, you said) has been active?
I can't imagine there are no elves who are unhappy about that

>>46857581
>Paladins
>Helping Evil

Your game is fucking dogshit.

>>46857655
>>46857673
Watch the elves be the fucking model soldiers, most of them fucking conscripts of 2000 from the population of 2100, that would die for their king, the bastard he is.

If you have to chose how you go down, and you might have to if the gm backs a predetermined outcome, your last bet is something beyond grandiose and ridiculous that forces the gm to react. You need to set up a scenario that will get the elf chick killed by her own hubris.

If you're going full dragon, you might want to try geas or golemifying yourself with a short list of instructions.

Something like, breathe fire at any elves you see/detect, polymorph any non essential body parts into magical weapons, and walk steadily in a predetermined direction towards where the elves came from.

If you have no motivation besides killing elves (literally nothing else in your head) and only the ability to walk forward, you should be able to bypass the illusioned forest.

>>46857697
Of course the elves are behaving like robots. They have to or else this entire siege makes no sense.

>>46857691
>If somebody who is considered Evil is doing a genuinely good act, all those he is trying to save are now not worthy of a Paladin's protection

Your reductionism of the situation leaves your conclusion relatively biased.

>>46840826

Just quit the campaign while you're ahead and find a new group.

>>46857691
There's a god letting innocents suffer and an elven warlord go on a rampage because Op had to use some moral grey methods to defend his home.
>>46857720
maybe they're enthralled

>>46857581
Nightmares are so bad that I can't rest properly in order to prepare my spells

Cleric is confused as hell.

Another note, what are the death tolls looking like, how many of the knife ears have you worked your way though?

>>46857748
Let the sorc kid put you to a dreamless sleep

>>46857748
>Nightmares are so bad that I can't rest properly in order to prepare my spells

Well, that's just flat out BS. At this point you might as well just have your wizard lock himself in his tower and leave the defense to the paladins.

>>46857748

Fucking what? Thats sus, any detail or just ogga booga shits scary?

>>46857748
what are the nightmares about ?

>>46857748
Not sure if there's a way to defend against http://ephe.github.io/grimoire/spells/dream .

LOLOLOLOL
that gm better get the lay of his life because he is fucking you hard right now.

Nightmares so bad I can't focus on what my character is defined by.

Throwing magic and writing shit down in tons of other situations no problem, literally able to work through going dragon, but lack of sleep is messing with my quill hand

>>46857748
>Can't prepare your spells
GG, it's over.
Getting fiated and having your pavises be shit? Can deal with that.
Having your students stolen? Revenge is a delicious dish
Turning into a dragon when paladins conveniently show up? Yeah sure
No spells as a wizard? Welcome to the bonezone.

Did you seriously not even get a will save? Nothing at all?
>>46857770
He still has to sleep 8 hours, enough time for everything to go horribly horribly wrong.

>>46857748

You might want to make sure your final gambit pays off.

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126 KB JPG

>>46857748
Sounds like himalaya sized BS.

Call the DMs bullshit and fiats in controlled matter

>>46857801
It's actually a standard spell.
>>46857801

>>46857748

Thats absolute bull shit. Total and absolute bull shit. Keep a record of all this man, you need to call the dm on this later.I would say take some sedatives, lets see him dm fiat you out of yoir spells then, but he just have things go wrong while your insensate.

>>46857756
During the night a group manage to climb the walls, but was killed by my soldiers

Nightmares are about my city destroyed, my students lying dead, raven teraing my eyes out and undead hands grabbing me under ground.

>>46857748
Do you have any way to shield your mind while you sleep?

The Death Knight might be attacking you in your sleep to keep you off your rocker.

Granted I don't know if Death Knights typically have that ability, but he's old as fuck so I thought I'd mention it. It wouldn't be first time I've seen an evil overlord try and pull something like that.

>>46857835
To prepare her daily spells, a wizard must first sleep for 8 hours. The wizard does not have to slumber for every minute of the time, but she must refrain from movement, combat, spellcasting, skill use, conversation, or any other fairly demanding physical or mental task during the rest period

I don't see where "waah waah bad nightmares" stop rest, maybe you won't get the best rest but it doesn't matter, all you need is some sort of break for 8 hours.

>>46857835

Undead ghosts playing with your mind maybe?

Maybe the clerics can help shield your dwelling from ghostly influences?

>>46857835
That seems pretty tame. That's not exactly madness-inducing tier. Those are just things you would dream about in that situation.

Heck, that just proves you got enough sleep to actually be dreaming.

Also, I think you can take a 'long rest' without going to sleep by just doing non-strenuous stuff. It works for warforged and elves, so just pull an all nighter to prepare your spells.

>>46857870

Pull our the rule book and point this out, quick anon we need page numbers

>>46857835
These

>>46857870
>>46857882

Have the sorcerer cast Sleep on you for a 1 minute nap, then spend the rest of the time reading a book. Boom, spells access

>>46857835
That nightmare seems tame in relation to the reality of facing a seize backed by an undead god and the gm's constant negating of your defenses.

Are you sure the nightmare isn't reality and the days where your defenses are handwaved over and over aren't the nightmare?

>>46857835

God Im stupid, this should have been my first response to that.

http://www.d20srd.org/srd/spells/nightmare.htm

Fixable by limited wish, emulate dispel evil, flip off the sky. Probably more ways but cant think of them off the top of my head.

http://www.dandwiki.com/wiki/SRD:Nightmare_(Spell)

>>The nightmare leaves the subject fatigued and unable to regain arcane spells for the next 24 hours.

>>Dispel evil cast on the subject while you are casting the spell dispels the nightmare and causes you to be stunned for 10 minutes per caster level of the dispel evil.

GUYS WE NEED STUFF THAT WILL PREVENT:

Illusion (Phantasm) [Mind-Affecting, Evil]

FROM AFFECTING OP

>>46857914

Good thinking anon, prevent the nightares with magic op.

>>46857921
http://www.d20srd.org/srd/spells/protectionFromEvil.htm

FIRST
FUCKING
LEVEL
ASK A PALADIN OR A CLERIC

>>46857956
The DM might be use that as a way for the Paladins and/or cleric to discover that he is turning into a dragon though, so be careful.

>>46857956

But he has no clerics, and if he asks the Palys the dm will out him as dragon.

>>46857956
It's only got a duration of 1 minute, though. OP will need something heavier to last him through the night, won't he?

>>46857914
Yeah this is what's been cast.

At one point, you will pass a will save and be able to regain spells. Use that time to cast limited wish or dispel magic.

>>46857956
That wouldn't work senpai, it says " the barrier blocks any attempt to possess the warded creature (by a magic jar attack, for example) or to exercise mental control over the creature (including enchantment (charm) effects and enchantment (compulsion) effects that grant the caster ongoing control over the subject, such as dominate person).", not that it protects the person from all effects.

>>46857748

Dude it wasn't the clerics god, the other player used an illusion to trick them, thats why they aren't here but the gods paladins are, quick talk with the cleric and have them attempt to comune with their god, the real one will infirm them of its will.

Saw a Elven woman in my dreams.

Elf's mom. I think she sent the cleric the vision too.

Cleric is furious, is coming to blow shit up.

>>46858000
FUCK
>>46858002
Could have somebody take turns casting, but otherwise that too. Dispel magic COULD work but with no cleric thanks to DM fuckery, well
>>46858012
It does help in that it gives a bonus to saves.
You know, what nightmare has negates its effects? A will save that the DM seemed to have most likely forgot about?

>Saving Throw: Will negates; see text

>>46844154
>>46844044

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chain-shot

or even load the cannon with chain-shot, yes its designed to take down masts, but will wipe out knife ears just as easy

>>46858046
>>46858037

I knew it! Incoming cleric people, our odds just got a lot better.

>>46858046
Furious with who?

You?

What happened?

>>46840826
>I'm worried, because the GM is currently banging the elf player, and he is deeply in love with her. She is a good player, but she got very strong-overpowered stuff in the last month, like immunity to illusions and some others powers from being the magical daughter of a Death Knight, who can kill people with touch and a word, and a elven female sorceress which is the most powerful mage in the setting.

On the off-chance this isn't just some bullshit fictional scenario invented for the sake of a HFY elf-hate That DM wankfest, you should just leave.

If the GM is already showing that level of favouritism to another player, and said player wants you dead, no amount of cunning strategy or manipulation of the rules is going to save you. So what if you can pull out some crazy combo that allows you to do a billion damage a round - the GM can just veto it with whatever half-assed explanation he likes, because he is god of this fictional world, and whatever he says, goes.

>>46858046
>Cleric bro inbound

We're good to go. Just hold them off with mundane means until he can arrive and use something to help cure your nightmares.

Then with the two of you you'll have a great defense against undead and the invading army.