Now, despite the Zoanthrope being the focus of all this trouble, the three techies didn't actually pay that much attention to it most of the time. For one thing, after Tink'd fixed the flickering problem, its stasis field had been working surprisingly well; it was always the devices scattered around the room that needed maintenance. Secondly, the Zoanthrope had gotten incredibly creepy after Sarge's slagged hull-metal shield had gotten wrapped around its head. It never moved obviously, being in stasis and all, but you always felt it was watching you under the metal, and the longer you looked at it the worse it got. In retrospect that was probably what some fancy-pants Inquisitory Super Agent Guy would've called a "clue", but we were a little too busy for that shit. We just accepted that the metal-faced xenos psyker that looked like a cross between a fetus, a snake, and a cockroach was creepy, and felt no need to examine said creepiness for a supernatural element.Anyway, all this meant that, when Tink crawled under the stasis unit to poke around and asked Fio to watch the field for any flickers, it was actually the first time anyone had really looked hard at the Zoanthrope since we'd re-entered the warp. After a minute or so, Fio asked Tink if he'd touched anything, and when the techie replied in the negative, the little Tau scientist explained that there was some sort of interference pattern inside the field. Tink looked at the focusing array above his head, which looked perfectly intact to him, and asked what the pattern had looked like, and whether it might be yet another psychic phenomena. Fio walked a circuit around the stasis unit, turned his head from side to side, and reported:>There's actually two focal points, both positioned right behind the Zoanthrope. They're sort of black and smoky, and shaped like little… wings?
>>44027113Thank you based Shoggy.
>>44027113Well here we are for the second part of the second part of the chapter.Quick note as we get started hereMy proofing pass this morning has discovered that the last 10 or so posts of this are shit, and I've only finished re-writing half of them. This'll probably mean the epilogue will be posted super slowly, since I doubt I can get the mess retyped while posting the rest. Anyway, this is just a warning that the ending will run late, but it will be finished eventually.>I’m putting everything into a single place where I can go in an edit stuff and junk. If you’d prefer to see these stories all in one spot instead of spread out over a thread or in a cap you can see the semi-finished product here:https://09cd64678bddc0198cca7fef0df8ce7b359fff2d.googledrive.com/host/0B3Z9sXPTD9rpN2owNGdVWmdFWXM/agp.html>I'm proofing and grabbing pics on the fly here, but I'll try to keep things moving. (Really, I will)>Criticism and Questions are always welcome.
Feels so good to catch it live.
Calm yourself, my tits!
>>44027113I CAUGHT IT LIVE!!!! HYPE HYPE HYPE
>>44027142If it's as good as always, it's worth the wait, Shoggy. You da best
>>44027113So no shit, there we were, in the middle of the warp, too low on fuel to even consider stopping, when we realized our captive ghost-summoning insectoid xenos psyker, was actually a ghost-summoning insectoid xenos DAEMONHOST. I mean, what the hell? Seriously. Just how in the name of the Emperor are you supposed to respond to something like that? There's bad situations, and then there's comically bad situations.Anyway, it actually took us a little while to figure out that the Zoanthrope was possessed. None of the techies knew much about daemons, and of the three of them, only Jim had been on the Occurrence Border during its maiden voyage as an Inquisitorial vessel and he hadn't actually encountered the daemon that had eventually possessed the Cogtain. So the three of them gawked at the Zoanthropes miniature smoky wings for a while, debated whether it was something that could be ignored, and eventually commed the rest of us to ask if we had any ideas what was going on.According to the armsmen fighting alongside Sarge, his swears were so vitriolic that they actually turned into little insectoid creatures as they left his mouth, and had to be swatted out of the air as they tried to bite people. Given how warpy his section of the line had gotten by that point, none of us questioned this. Doc burst into hysterical laughter when he heard. This caused a little bit concern among the medical staff, especially the two nurses who'd seen him melting people with Tyranid biotoxin. Sister Valerie carefully relieved him of his scalpel, dosed him with something relaxing but not incapacitating, and took over Gravis watch while he giggled his way down to the Cells to see the wings for himself.After a brief period of mindless panic, Nubby denied all responsibility for what had happened, and then had to explain to those of us who hadn't been there what exactly wasn't his fault.Twitch just screamed "I TOLD YOU IT WAS DAEMONIDS" into his combead until Tink muted him.
>>44027113Awww yiss. Gonna be tired tomorrow.
>>44027113Yes! He returns!
>>44027113Here it is. Final chapter.Break our hearts Shoggy.BRING IT!!!
>>44027113Baaaaaaaaaaaaaased! Shoggy's back!Dis gon' b gud!Shoggy, where do you find all your images? That might be, I think, the hardest part about trying to storytime the All Cogbro Party.
Aw yisss AGP!>>44027113>felt no need to examine said creepiness for a supernatural element.Not even after all they'd been through?
>>44027231What in the world makes you think this is the Final Chapter of the AGP?It's just the final chapter of Tyranid Delivery Experts.
OMG I caught AGP live! I love you shoggy!
>>44027113SHOGGY!Also, I've gotta say that is one persistant Daemon - I'm pretty sure it's the same one that manifested on the pilgrim ship mission. It probably is out for revenge at this point, but I have to wonder why it stalked your party to begin with
>>44027206Over the course of the next few hours everything that had been happening started making sense.There was some initial confusion about how it was all possible, since the Xenology Adept kept telling us absolutely could not possess Tyranids. He gave this big lecture on how the Hive Mind worked then trotted out that old line about Nids not having minds or souls (though anyone who's seen a Daemon Engine stomping around a battlefield can tell you neither of those are strictly required). Anyway, the man was obviously full of shit: I mean, we could all see the wings, just sitting there being all smoky and sinister, if a bit on the tiny side. Can't really argue with that. So, whether it was a matter of a dozen unimaginable coincidences coming together to make the impossible possible, or if the Emperor had just decided to screw with us, we had the first known case of a possessed Tyranid sitting in the Cells. We hoped Oak's research buddy would be happy with it, because we weren't going to go back and get another one.Where the daemon had come from was a little more clear. Back during our first trip on the Occurrence Border, we'd come down to the Psyker Containment Cells and found them occupied by five child psykers in stasis, and a half-pint daemonhost who wasn't. After we looted a crucial part of the machinery restraining the daemonhost (as well as the five non-possessed children), the thing had chased us across the ship. It had looked like a kid with massive wings made of smoke, curly horns, and glowing eyes, at least until we shot its host body to pieces and it ran off to get a new one. The daemon came back a little later as a knarloc with the same wings and such, and had then gotten tangled up in a fight with a giant daemonic-servitor-titan thing that the tech-priest acting as the ship's Captain had been constructing for whatever insane reason. That had ended with the knarloc being incorporated into the servi-titan and daemon taking over the Cogtain.
>>44027113Fuck yeah, it didn't take weeks since last time this time!
>>44027206>Twitch just screamed "I TOLD YOU IT WAS DAEMONIDS" into his combead until Tink muted him.Never change Twitch
>>44027335Shoggy will this really be the last agp? WHYYY :(
Sunday Shoggy is best Shoggy.Bring it.
>>44027231>>44027288Just to confirm, there are 2 more chapters left, plus the epilogue. Whether I split them up for posting is still undecided.>>44027233Lots and lots of random googling for semi-related stuff, plus a big folder of tg images. It is not a fast process.
>>44027288Last thread he said something along those lines.But I like your interpretation better.
>>44027327It's been wedged/splattered/infused into the floor of the ship since they "killed" it, and even before that, wasn't it stasis-ified in the holding cells when they got the damn thing? Otherwise how would Bill have known to warn them about that cell when they were taking the other psyker kids? One way or another, it's been stuck on the damn ship for a while and is probably pretty pissed about it. Daemons tend to be pretty good at grudges.
>>44027387>>44027392>>44027393The clarify the clarification:AT LEAST 2 MORE THREADS, MAYBE 5
>>44027392>2 more chapters left, plus the epilogue.Only two?But, then what will I have to live for?
>>44027113WB shoggy how was thanksgiving? I'm the asshat from gmail who sent your work to fantasy flight if more people tell them about you, there is actually a fairly good chance your tales might get in stuff. Black library hasn't said shit though...
>>44027423Maybe Shoggy will get into a new game.
CAUGHT IT LIVE. ALL HAIL THE GUARDSMAN PARTY
>>44027415Awh, only two more chapters? :(>>44027404I'm reasonably certain it was the skeleton bros who warned them about the cell, not Old Bill.
>>44027415>SunYAY MOAR GUARDSMEN PLEASE MAKE MORE CHAPTERS..(its the only thing keeping me from deppresion.)
>>44027455His GM should take in a disciple, while Shoggy and teammates teach a whole new group how to play and write, just so we can keep hearing about these fantastical games.I volunteer as any.
>>44027404Bill didn't warn them about that cell. That was the skelebros.The Daemon might have been able to infiltrate one of the ships after being blasted by our brave heroes and take over one of the psyker kids, the ones they were sent to find with the Cog Asshole Inquisitor who had a lot of psykers
I'M LIVE MOTHAFUCKAAAAA
Poor Doc.Also, you'd think Nubby would get punched more often.
>>44027393No, he said he would be posting the final part of this section on sunday, but people saw the word "final" and freaked out.
>>44027425it may end up in a Dark Heresy supplement book, they did it with The Guy Who Cried Grendel
>>44027455Numenera maybe? That would be interesting
I love you Shoggy. You ever come to Seattle and I'll buy you as many beers as you want.
I caught it live.B-but I have work in two hours.
>>44027393Reading comprehension, dingus. It was the last of the current arc, not the final final storyThat said, i doubt Shoggy will be able to write up two sessions in less than three threads each, so no need to panic since we'll probably end up with 5+ more threads
>>44027524^my reaction exactly
>>44027335It took some doing, but we eventually destroyed the servi-knarlo-titan, pitched the Cogtain into the bridge-lift's shaft, and cranked the gravity up as high as it would go. That'd done for the Cogtain, and between reducing its host to a greasy crater and our subsequent exit from the warp, we'd assumed that was last we'd seen of the smoke-winged daemon as well. The fact that the Cogtain's crater could never be repaired, even by replacing entire sections of floor and wall, and the way it screamed at people in binary probably should've tipped us off.So we'd dismissed the glowing, screaming crater as just another Occurrence Border thing (trust me, it doesn't sound stupid after you've been on the ship for a while), and got on with our lives. It didn't come to our attention again until we began refurbishing the Cells in preparation for the Zoanthrope, and had discovered that there was some sort of daemonic portal linking the cell that'd held the daemon's first host to the crater. Once again we dismissed it as just another phenomena, and pretty much forgot about it. In retrospect, even without the daemonic involvement, it should've occurred to us that having some sort of warp-portal INSIDE of all the psi-shielding and warp-presence shrouding was a very bad thing.Not being daemonologists, we had no idea whether the daemon had been lurking in the cell or crater all this time, or if it had actually returned from the warp via the places it had tainted. Either way, the presence of a restrained and frequently unconscious psychic being, with no Emperor or Hive Mind to protect it, must have looked incredibly tasty to it. The daemon had probably been slowly corrupting the Zoanthrope ever since we caught it (How does that work with a giant bug anyway? Does the daemon tempt it promises of sugar or something?), but we felt fairly certain that the that Sarge knocking the Zoanthrope out consciousness and into the tainted cell had been the final straw.
>>44027556If my math is correct, that's somewhere between 3 to 4 months in Shoggy Time.
>>44027479>>44027502My mistake, guess I need to re-read the saga sometime, I had thought it was one of the sticky-notes.
If Tyranids could be corrupted by sugar, a lot of people in the Imperium of Man would be a lot less dead
>>44027616That's good news
>>44027425Went good, climbed some rocks, did some hikes, got infected with plagues, the usual.>>44027616Yea...
I caught it liveWitness me Shoggy!
>>44027113And here I was thinking I'd get an early night in
>>44027647Perhaps you need super-special Slaneesh Brand Warp Sugar to tempt them?
>>44027651It's the first time i've caught you live Shoggy, i usually end up having to read it on your google drive. I'm so happy.
>>44027582After we'd figured out that we were dealing with (as Twitch put it) a Daemonthrope, and one that was sort of connected to this warp-portal which bypassed all of the psi-shielding around the cells to boot, all the stuff with the ghost-nids made sense. Well sort of, we still didn't know what exactly they were, but at least it was clear how they were being called into existence despite the Zoanthrope being contained in the cell. None of us were experts on imprisoning daemonhosts, but we were pretty sure it took a bit more than a few psi-suppressors and a stasis field to do the job properly.Of course knowing that you're doing something wrong wrong isn't the same as knowing how to do it right. The Inquisition had always operated under the assumption that daemon-lore was a very need-to-know subject, and in the Inquisition's opinion a bunch of dumb grunts most certainly did NOT need to know. Mind you, up until this shit-show we'd agreed with that assessment. None of us had ever imagined that we'd wind up trying to prevent a daemonically possessed psychic bug from summoning tides of ethereal tyranids, or at least not without just killing the damned thing and calling it a day. Anyway, the point is that our team's combined knowledge of daemon-binding (or whatever you call it) consisted of a suspicion that it probably involved a bunch of runic circles, holy icons, and sinister looking chains that weren't actually connected to anything load-bearing. The key words there were "suspicion" and "probably" by the way.So lacking even the slightest idea how to handle the Daemon directly, we decided to hope like hell that dealing with the source of the problem would somehow fix everything. All of our highly developed problem solving skills were focused on the daemonically tainted cell, and a complex plan of action was formed. Which is to say that we set up a blast shield and tossed half a dozen detpacks into it.
>>44027113B A S E DASED
>>44027113Love your stuff man look forward to reading it when I catchup with last chapter
>>44027748>Which is to say that we set up a blast shield and tossed half a dozen detpacks into it.Oh no.Why not call down the confessors and a choir of folks to sing emperormas songs at it.
>>44027748>Which is to say that we set up a blast shield and tossed half a dozen detpacks into it.What, no blessed promethium and holy shrapnel this time?
>>44027748>Which is to say that we set up a blast shield and tossed half a dozen detpacks into it.
I say, our friend Doc seems to be going pretty crazy lately. What's his Insanity Point situation?
>>44027455I wish it's Shadowrun.Just imagine the craziness.
>>44027748Of course the "just blow up the daemonic portal" plan didn't work, but y'know it MIGHT have, and it would've been really silly not to check. So, after establishing that all we'd managed to do was severely damage the shrine surrounding the Cogtain's crater and scare the shit out of a bunch of tech-acolytes working on the bridge-lift, we moved on to our next low-effort solution. We took one of our three spare pieces of psi-shielding, crammed it into the doorway to the tainted cell, and then slapped a few dozen prayer seals on it. When that didn't work we added the two other pieces of shielding, and when THAT didn't work, we finally allowed Fumbles to take a look. That was a nervous ten minutes, let me tell you.Despite our very well-founded concerns, letting the accident-prone psyker poke at the daemonic warp-portal worked out fine. Mostly because the psi-suppressors kept him from doing anything when he eventually spazzed out. Afterwards, once Fumbles had been woken up, and Twitch had stopped abjuring him and throwing holy water around, the psyker blearily reported that nothing we were doing actually had any effect on the flow of daemonic energy between the tainted cell and the Daemonthrope. However, he was reasonably sure that increasing the distance between to two would at least reduce the flow a bit. Since moving the warp-portal wasn't an option, the only way to accomplish this was by moving the Daemonthrope, plus the various pieces of technology which kept it from killing us all.The task of figuring out how to more or less relocate the entirety of the Cells fell to Tink, who immediately declared it to be impossible. This didn't stop him from calling a council of the nerds, including Ol' Bill and Hannah, to figure out exactly how impossible it was though.
>>44027818They're kinda under pressure right now. Those resources might be needed elsewhere.>>44027870I don't think he's crazy, but you melt ONE person with xenomorph bio-acid and everyone starts edging away when you receive bad news.
>>44027423There's always the possibility of a spinoff series where we see the same events through the eyes of the various interrogators, allies and other minor characters. Imagine Tyranid Acquisition Experts as seen from the perspective of Gravis. Or What's in the Box as told by the Rupert (with occasional notes, clarifications and interjections by Alfred.)>I know it won't happen but I can dream dammit!
>>44027906NONONONONO! Can you imagine Shoggy playing PARANOIA? or Call of Cthulhu?
>>44027870We were all taking hits for the whole journey, but he rolled poorer than most. Wound up with a compulsion about Gravis.
>>44027908Obviously the answer is to jettison the daemonhost into spess.In the warp.Stealth shuttle may or may not be involved.
>>44027945No. No I Cannot.
>>44027582>Does the daemon tempt it promises of sugar or something?Yes.
>>44027960too much trouble.They should burn it and say they jettisoned it into spess.
>>44027956Guess that didn't help with the jokes about his girlfriend getting jealous.
>>44027930>They're kinda under pressure right now. Those resources might be needed elsewhere.Good point.>>44027956Poor Doc. OTOH, that might clear up just fine when you hand Gravis off to qualified, competent medical personnel.
>>44027945My god.Everyone is John.
>The task of figuring out how to more or less relocate the entirety of the Cells fell to Tink, who immediately declared it to be impossible. This didn't stop him from calling a council of the nerds, including Ol' Bill and Hannah, to figure out exactly how impossible it was though.>"it doesn't work! I need to call everyone over to explain how much it doesn't work!"Tink really is an engineer.
>>44027932Oh man, I'd love to see a PoV from some of the people they've fought with. The horror at their general lack of tact and subtlety followed by admiration for their ability to solve most problems with violence.
yeah niguh let's go
I can only imagine that, at the other end of this journey, the =][= are going to be all "What the Warp is this shit? A Daemonthrope? We didn't order a Daemonthrope! How the fuck did you incompetent nincompoops actually manage to get a Zoanthrope possessed?! That's not supposed to be POSSIBLE!
>>44028074Tribunal of Inquiry has been mentioned already...
>>44028074If Oak didn't want this shit, he wouldn't have sent the AGP.
>>44027908Tink and his little think-tank quickly established that the only system in the Cells that could be easily moved was the psi-suppression. This was primarily because they'd stopped bothering to bolt the suppressors back down between maintenance cycles, so they were all just taped to the floors and walls. On the other hand, the psi-shielding and warp-presence Shroud, which Fumbles said were hiding the Daemonthrope's location from its ghost-nids, were pretty much built into the structure of the Cells. Just removing them would require days of cutting, during which the ghost-nids would probably swarm the Cells. Finally, the stasis-unit restraining the Daemonthrope was NOT designed to be moved. Jostling the focusing array could cause problems ranging from flickers to spontaneous bisection of anything inside the stasis field, and power efficiency hadn't even been considered in its design so running it off a battery was going to be tricky.The first problem to be solved was the stasis field. Tink and Fio realized that they didn’t have to fix everything wrong with the Daemonthrope’s stasis unit, since they had a much-better one sitting nearly-finished, just a few rooms away. Their decision to repurpose Gravis’ stasis unit almost got the two of them stabbed by an enraged medic, but luckily they were able to propose a solution for keeping Gravis alive as well. Tink explained, from behind an overturned table, that there was no reason that the nearly-dead Space Marine couldn’t just be thrown into the Daemonthrope’s stasis unit after the bug had been relocated. Doc had not been happy with leaving his patient, even in stasis, next a daemonically-tainted hole in reality, but eventually agreed and allowed Tink to flee the medbay.
>>44028074"Possible?!? HAVE YOU CHECKED OUR BLOODY RECORD?!?"
How many characters are insane now, anyway? Twitch is paranoid, Aimy is obsessed with her hair, Nubby is a kleptomaniac, Tink has a fetish for heretical Xenotech, Sarge is a misanthrope - dammit, I think Doc was the only sane guy on the team.
>>44027932This is ... a surprisingly good idea. Although if done by someone who wasn't at the actual sessions, there have to be some artistic license issued by the appropriate branch of the administratum
Second time ive caught AGP live. Thank you based shoggy!!!
>>44028110>Just removing them would require days of cutting, during which the ghost-nids would probably swarm the Cells. Finally, the stasis-unit restraining the Daemonthrope was NOT designed to be moved. Jostling the focusing array could cause problems ranging from flickers to spontaneous bisection of anything inside the stasis field, and power efficiency hadn't even been considered in its design so running it off a battery was going to be tricky.Now it's an AGP party.
>>44027206>So no shit, there we wereI've been waiting for this.>There's bad situations, and then there's comically bad situations.This sums up the All Guardsmen Party series in one sentence.
>>44028110>Doc had not been happy with leaving his patient, even in stasis, next a daemonically-tainted hole in realityInb4 Night Lord Gravis with the little pointy wings.
>>44028110>Tink explained, from behind an overturned table, that there was no reason that the nearly-dead Space Marine couldn’t just be thrown into the Daemonthrope’s stasis unit after the bug had been relocated.Pic Related.>>44028115"What, no we haven't... HOLY TERRA, WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU MANIACS STILL DOING FLYING AROUND ON ACTIVE SERVICE?!"
>>44028110oh god, Gravis is so going to become a chaos space marineif he doesn't end up corrupted then the Emperor Himself might have blessed this marine
>>44028188>Now it's an AGP party.... where the only dance they dance is the Charlie Foxtrot, and the buffet is wall-to-wall cake and arse.
>>44028245>... where the only dance they dance is the Charlie Foxtrot, and the buffet is wall-to-wall cake and arse.And the other guy is usually leading the orchestra.
>>44028237Gravis, interred in a dreadnought, is brought out once a century to tell the tale to the Neophytes. The Chaplains have him do this to scare the overconfidence out of them.
>>44027801because they mostly already tried.
>>44028277The tale of the All Guardsman Party, or, how a bunch of fricking assholes with detpacks managed to consecutively drop an op into the Mk. VIII Godwyn-Pattern Field Latrine, and then extract it all on their own?
>>44028289To the ghost nids, not the daemonid.
>>44027113Damn I wish I didn't need sleep. I will have to read the rest in the morning. Awesome writing as always Shoggy.
>>44028203He'd have a hard time chasing people with no legs.
>>44028237I don't think that should be an issue on the scale of things since he is only half the man he used to be.
>>44028321You don't need sleep.
>>44028277>-and never forget to respect the harm even the lowliest enemy, or ally for that matter, can cause to the unwary, initates. >Honoured Sergeant, surely they are but guardsmen? What damage could they possibly do to us?>Brother Gravis? I think that's your cue.
>>44028115Well beyond the point of 'too crazy to work,' there exists a narrow band of 'too crazy to fail,' and the AGP has occupied and fortified it.
did i catch it live for once?
ZOMG, CAUGHT IT LIVE
>>44028110The psi-shielding and the Shroud were much trickier problems, and a fair bit of time was spent lamenting that the whole mess at the Station had ruined our original plans to requisition enough materials to completely rebuild the Cells. After a few hours of trying to figure out how to pull everything out and set it back up before a tide of ghost-nids killed everyone, the ludicrous proposal of cutting a massive hole through the ship, and moving the Cells (minus the warpy bit) as one big-ol' thingy was put forward. Luckily Ol’ Bill saved us all from that retarded plan when he decided to take a second look at the list of parts that'd need to moved.Consummate scrounger that he was, Ol' Bill could typically suggest five different alternatives for any missing critical part, and he was better than a savant when it came to keeping track of what had be used where and whether it would be missed. His abilities had let him down a little bit when it came to the highly-specialized systems in the Cells, but they came to our rescue in a big way when he asked whether a psi-shield panel was anything like a psi-focussing panel. After some debate, Tink pointed out that it was all moot, since there weren't any psi-focussing panels in the inventory; Ol' Bill asked whether anyone thought our headless astropath still needed the ones lining his sanctum.One quick check of the dried-brains-splattered sanctum later, it was established the panels which focussed incoming astropathic messages on the chair in the middle of the sanctum could indeed be repurposed as shields. Fio, who'd become the resident expert on the underlying theory of most of the systems in the Cells, claimed it was just a matter of tweaking the machinery that aligned the crystal matrices in each panel, and began estimating how long it would take to move them all the bay that'd been picked for the new Cells. Tink asked why the hell we should bother moving them.
>>44028347And Twitch dropped most of his demo in to crazy to work so nobody goes there in the first place.
>>44028331Space Batman needs no legs.Not on the Occurrence Border.
>>44027908Let me guess - the wraithbone will eventually do the trick.
>>44028379>Tink asked why the hell we should bother moving them.The Captain's not gonna be happy about this one!I love it.
>>44028379>Tink asked why the hell we should bother moving them.See! This is why you need commissars!
>>44027392>2 to 5 more chapters of AGP.>epilogue
>>44028426The commissar would have shot himself a long time ago.
>>44028426No Commissars could last aboard the Oh-Bee. They're too high-strung, they'd snap inside a week and run around the ship, BLAMMING vital ship systems for HERESY.
>>44028040I love the concept of a Council of the Nerds.
>>44028426Self-defense summary execution?
>>44028442Funny you should say that, since that's precisely what the report said.I assume it was grief that made the CO spell his own name wrong when signing it off.
>>44028468If by that is meant >>44028442 I guess
>>44028379It really says something that a Tau is your resident expert on psychic machinery. Then again, between the telepathic worms and the telekinetic flatbears the Tau Empire has its own fair share of psykers.
>>44028379>stick daemonid in astropath chair>send chaos chitterings to astropaths on a sector wide scaleAwesome.
>>44028346>Aye, Neophytes, no shit, there I was, sent to capture a live tyranid for the Holy Inquisition....
>>44028496>Sector-wide =][= Approved kill order CONFIRMED
>>44028379The decision to just repurpose the Occurrence Border's bridge-adjacent Astropathic Sanctum as a Daemonthrope holding area was reached quickly by Tink and his fellow nerds. It took a little more time and a LOT more shouting for Sarge, the Captain, and the Navigator (whose sanctum was next door) to come around, and that time was used to tackle the final problem: the warp-presence Shroud.The Shroud was a device which hid the warp-presence of anyone inside from those outside. Such devices were typically used to hide vulnerable psykers from hungry daemons during warp-travel, but they were also great for hiding from other psykers. Since the Occurrence Border had been smuggling child-psykers, a practice which the Inquisition SORT OF frowned upon, the Cells had a very good Shroud, though it hadn't done jack to hide the Zoanthrope from the daemon that'd been lurking inside its radius. Anyway, this well-made Shroud consisted of a fair-sized pile of arcane machinery which was unfortunately hooked to some sort of projector matrix embedded in the psi-shields.Once again it seemed like days of disassembling while fighting off a ghost-nid onslaught would be needed, but Fio had a better idea. The little Tau scientist claimed that the block of wraithbone he'd been playing with for the last few weeks had some interesting anti-warp properties, and he was 72.361% sure that it could be used to build something that would work like a Shroud. It was a mark of everyone's exhaustion that the annoying little xenos' idea was accepted without argument.So roughly twenty-six sleepless hours after our discovery of the Zoanthrope's wings, we'd designed a new Cell to contain it. Thirty hours of hard work and heroic ghost-tyranid killing after that, the new cell was complete, and all that was left to do was transport the barely-restrained xenos daemonhost through a ship filled with the ravenous insectoid warp-ghosts it'd called into existence.
>>44028379>Ol' Bill asked whether anyone thought our headless astropath still needed the ones lining his sanctum.Was this a GMPC helping you at this point, or a wild idea from a player that was just assigned to him?
>>44028540>Gravis's corruption is it slowly turned him into a AGP Guardsmen mentallymy godwhat has our clumsy hands wraught upon this galaxy
Wait, there are 2 whole chapters of "Tyranid Delivery Experts" left? Or the AGP in general?
GO SHOGGY GO!So glad I caught it live! All of Reddit is behind you, so shine on!
>>44028554What's the distances between these "cells" again? Hell, I'm satisfied with two spots on the ol' occurence border image.
>>44028613don't start that shit again.
>>44028554When Tink said everything was ready, all of us plus Fio, and Gravis' mobile medical monstrosity gathered in the cells. During the prior few days we'd managed to hold off ghost-nids and keep the Space Marine alive despite a steady increase in the Daemonthrope's power over the ship and the irreparable failure of one of the psi-suppressors. During the little free time we'd had, a route had been plotted from the Cells, up through the lower decks to the bridge-lift, and finally to the Sanctum. The corridors were cleared of impediments, all the armsmen that could be spared from the main lines were stationed at checkpoints along the route, and the new stasis unit had been mounted on a motorized cargo pallet. When the last of the preparations were finished, Sarge alerted the Captain, who sent out a ship-wide warning, and we got ready for the most hectic prisoner transfer of our lives.The first step of transfer was moving the Daemonthrope from its old stasis unit to the new mobile one. There's probably a whole chapter on this sort of thing in whatever the Inquisitorial equivalent of the Uplifting Primer is. You're probably supposed to use all sorts of seals, powerful psykers, and some of that special Tyranid tranquilizer the Scythes had. We made do with a few ropes, a ramp made out of a wall-panel that no one would miss, and a cargo net.Tink lined up his long-distance manipulation tool (see: poking stick) on the Stasis Unit's Off-Button, then jabbed it and dove for cover. As the stasis field vanished, a pair of deep-red spots appeared on the Daemonthrope's metal-covered face, and its stubby little smoke-wings suddenly expanded to a full meter in length. A horrible soundless screech echoed through the Cells, thousands of insects began pouring out of every crack and crevice, and a corona of black-edged green lighting formed around Daemonthrope. Then the cargo net yanked it off its grav plates, and dragged it face-first down the corrugated metal ramp.
>>44028648Subjecting Daemons and the like to horribly mundane indignities is probably one of the best ways to combat them and/or piss them off.
LIVE GUARDS! LIVE GUARD HERE!I DON'T HAVE A HAPPY ENOUGH IMAGE FOR THIS POST! TAKE THIS ADVICE INSTEAD!
>>44028648>As the stasis field vanished, a pair of deep-red spots appeared on the Daemonthrope's metal-covered face, and its stubby little smoke-wings suddenly expanded to a full meter in length. A horrible soundless screech echoed through the Cells, thousands of insects began pouring out of every crack and crevice, and a corona of black-edged green lighting formed around Daemonthrope.That's not a good thing.
>>44028648Smokey seems very cranky from the long napSarge should beat it with another chunk of metal and then duct tape him into the statis unit to make him go to bed
>>44028648I'm having doubts about the plan!!!!
>>44028616As I recall?Cells are near the bottom. Bridge is WAY on top of the ship.
>>44028648The Daemonthope flailed around a little, but didn't have enough strength to offset the manly (and womanly) muscle of four guardsmen. We dragged it, screeching and kicking up sparks, into the waiting stasis unit, and Fio turned on the field. The insects around the room vanished in little puffs of black and green smoke, but a faint echo of the psychic screeching lingered, and the spots where the Daemonthrope's expanded wings met the edge of the stasis field smoked in an ominous way. Sarge decided that this shit was too eldritch for his liking yelled at Tink, Fio, and Doc to move their asses.Doc was in a bit of a panic on account of how insects had been crawling out of Gravis' torso-wound during the Daemonthrope transfer, and the fact that every life-support system hooked up the Marine was screaming for attention. He dithered around trying to figure out what to treat first, until Sarge resolved things by hefting Gravis off his life-support bed. Doc tried and failed to keep everything connected as the torso-fied Space Marine was hauled across the room, then just gave up and helped Sarge. Gravis started to spasm and spurt all sorts of disgusting fluids as he was pushed into the bubble of null-g in the middle of the stasis unit, prompting Doc to panic and hit the On-Button a little early. He apologised profusely as he bandaged Sarge's slightly-shorter finger, and sprayed disinfectant over everything Gravis had dribbled on.While Gravis was moved, Tink and Fio ran around directing us and their drones in the process of moving the psi-suppressors. Extensions were spliced into the power cords of each of the hacked-together Tau-Imperial hybrid devices, and a jumbled circle of arcane machinery was formed around the Daemonthrope's stasis-pallet. Then, piece by piece, each of the psi-suppressors was fastened to the pallet, until it bristled with various engines, antennas, crystals, and less-identifiable pieces of tech.
>>44028648>...Then the cargo net yanked it off its grav plates, and dragged it face-first down the corrugated metal ramp.
>>44028736I wonder if the daemons gather in the warp after they've been banished, and share tales of how they fell.If they do, it's no wonder he's so pissed off. He's like the ginger stepchild of Chaos
>>44028648>FEAR ME FOR I AM WTFFFFFFFFF*slam* (punching and power wrenching intensifies)
>>44028805I bet he's an Unaligned daemon. Everybody hates on those.
>>44028805> SO NO SHIT, THERE I WAS ON THIS WRETCHED SHITHOLE OF A FLYING SPACE HULK, AND THE ONLY HOST I COULD FIND WAS A TWELVE-YEAR-OLD BOY!
>>44028138>Sarge is a misanthropeSounds like about as solid proof of sanity as you can get.
>>44028770When all the suppressors were fastened down and connected to the large battery array mounted on the front of the pallet, and Gravis was safe-ish in the Daemonthrope's old Stasis Unit (we were pretty sure that his expression of pain and horror wasn't anything to worry about), we readied our weapons and got ready for the hard part. Sarge sent a final warning to the Captain, and counted down. As Sarge reached zero, Spot 2.0 opened the outer door to the Cells, and all across the ship the tyranid warp-ghosts paused in their pursuit of re-positioning armsmen, turned to focus on us, and solidified. We came out of the Cells at a dead sprint, or at least those of us on foot did. Fio was perched in a semi-clear spot on the Pallet behind the Daemonthrope, gibbering at his drones in Tau-speak and doing his best to keep everything from spontaneously exploding. Tink had a similar spot on battery-pack, and was splitting his attention between steering the Pallet and scouting ahead with Spot. Twitch and Sarge were on point, pulling ahead to cover each corner and doorway. Aimy and Doc were keeping an eye on our flanks from the middle of the group. Finally Nubby was squeezed into a crevice at the back of the Pallet, where he was simultaneously able to cover our rear and avoid doing any running.To our immense relief, we made it to the end of the corridor without the Daemonthrope doing anything warpy or a swarm of ghost-nids just appearing around us. Tink and Fio had said that leaving the Cells wouldn't suddenly grant the Daemonthrope more power, but the rest of us hadn't been so sure. Anyway, after that first straightaway we began winding through the area around the Cells in a manner that could be described as "drunken". Despite all appearances though, it really was the fastest route available.
>>44028138Aimy is probably one of the more normal people there. Or at least, as normal as one can be after being stuck with the horrifying messes that the AGP get into.
>>44028910>IT GETS FUCKING BETTER. AFTER A WHILE I CAN'T POSSESS THE FUCKING KID. SO THANKS TO SOME FUCKING GUARDSMEN I HAD TO POSSESS A MOTHERFUCKING KNARLOC. I THOUGHT A FUCKIN KID WAS BAD.
>>44028496This'll teach them to try to get vengeance on us.
>>44028993> YEP, THAT WAS ME, POSSESSING A FREAKING GREATER KNARLOC! HOW MUCH LOWER DOES IT GET THAN A FREAKIN' ANIMAL?> I'LL TELL YOU HOW. YOUR ANIMAL WINDS UP DOING BATTLE WITH A DAEMONI-SERVITITAN, AND GETS TORN APART AND INCORPORATED.>> SURE, I WOUND UP IN CONTROL OF THE GESTALT ENTITY, BUT THAT WAS REALLY EMBARRASSING!
>>44028974Due to the chaotic layout of the Occurrence Border, the size of the Pallet, and the amount of the ship occupied by the ghost-nids, the path we'd mapped to the Sanctum was anything but direct. The first leg involved a winding path around the Cells area, which took us dangerously close to ghost-nid territory before depositing us at one of the few major "tilt-corridors" still under our control. We ran as fast as we could through connecting corridors, across recently cleared storage bays, and up the occasional micro-lift, ignoring the various minor phenomena, maddening whispers, and occasional uncleared technical hazards. Our progress was surprisingly good, possibly because we were lent extra motivation by what sounded like every ghost-nid on the ship baying for our blood, but it wasn't enough to keep us ahead of the entirety of the swarm: the first pack of ghost-nids clawed its way out of an oversized air vent behind us as we exited a short in-bay lift.Luckily that first pack hadn't included any ghostly termaguants or higher forms: it was just a bunch of hormagaunts and rippers, though they were significantly more solid than any we'd encountered during the previous weeks. Solidity aside, we knew how to deal with a bunch of melee hostiles coming up a cover-less corridor. Nubby began picking off the lead bugs with pulse fire, while Twitch dug through his detonators, and the rest of us kept moving. As the bulk of the pack passed a pair of yellow X-marks on the corridor wall behind us, Twitch found the right detonator, and set off two of the frag-mines he'd lined the corridor with. Doc and Aimy paused for a second to help Nubby mop up the stragglers, and then everyone returned to their positions and our flight continued without the Pallet ever losing any speed. As the last of us left the corridor, Twitch armed the rest of the mines, and a minute later we heard them start going off.
>>44029047Just use the room marked"full o fbees?" to distract the nids!
I like the idea that almost every entity the AGP meet seems to develop a miniture guardsmen in their headlike, just imagine Gravis being>It's Orks.>but brother Gravis, the scans arn't clear->It. Is. Orks.Every deployment, especially against Tyranids. They then probably fight some Tyranids that are being used as Ork Warmounts, because the Tyranids ate all the other animals the Orks might want and they havn't got any trukks.
>>44028974>Gravis was safe-ish in the Daemonthrope's old Stasis Unit (we were pretty sure that his expression of pain and horror wasn't anything to worry about)The poor fucker.
>>44029047There's a lot of space outside of the OB that's ghost nid territory.We better nuke the whole thing from orbit. It's the only way to be sure.
>>44029047Sounds like this calls for a lance battery
>>44029103When the God-Emperor said 'They shall know no fear', he'd never expected the AGP.
>>44029047First the fungus, now the bugs.Calling it right now - the ship will turn into a miniature eye of terror by the end of this adventure.
>>44029101Somewhere in the warp there's a daemon that's constantly nicking stuff off the other demons and selling it. The other demons complain about how he smells and call him an absolute tit behind his back. He's got a signed certificate from Magnus The Red to say that, appearances to the contrary, he really is a demon.
>>44029149A eye of terror made of guardsmen. Filled with explosions everywhere, nubbys odor and 24/7 bombardment of hertaical tau vids. Every not and data slate will always be page apon page of docs sappy love notes. Also you will always hear a man screaming GODDAMNIT NUBBY while chasing you around at night.
>>44029047Variations of that little scuffle were repeated a dozen times as we escorted the Daemonthrope towards the checkpoint at the start of the tilt-corridor. The ghost-nids were harder to kill than any we'd encountered during the previous weeks, they took just as much killing as real tyranids despite the way they poofed into smoke when they finally died. On the bright side, the bugs' new solidity seemed to have robbed them of their ability to move through walls, though they made up for it with a freakish ability to home in on us. Wave after wave of the bugs came up behind our little convoy, as well as through the vents on the walls and ceilings, and eventually from ahead of us as our course turned back towards the ghost-nid territory. The continuous attacks slowed us down a little, but didn't pose a serious threat: they were just Gaunts and Rippers after all, and we were bloody Imperial Guardsmen. Mowing down endless waves of under-armed xenos with superior firepower is what the Emperor made us for. Between Twitch's mines, the early warnings and target marking from Spot the Wonder Drone, and giant pile of pulse-ammo we'd brought along, we dropped most of the nids the second we saw them. Of course that's not to say that EVERYTHING went our way: either the Daemonthrope was exhibiting some serious power despite its stasis-ed state, or the Occurrence Border's warpy little machine-spirit had a really twisted sense of humor. On four occasions during our twisty run towards the checkpoint at the bottom of the tilt-corridor we ran into phenomena that seemed specifically designed to either slow us down or assist the ghost-nids in killing us.
>>44029173>The Daemon manages to steal a ship in warp-travel>it's full of Grey Knights, Ultramarines appear in certain sections of the ship, Sisters of Battle randomly appear when you open a door sometimesFUCKING DAEMON NUBBY
>>44028632Excuse you, we're all having fun here. Just because I saw the alert that a live one was up posted there doesn't mean you get to be all uppity.
>>44029241>the Occurrence Border's warpy little machine-spirit had a really twisted sense of humor>jim" I TOLD YOU IT HATES TRIPLEX CONNECTORS!"
>>44029241>owards the checkpoint at the bottom of the tilt-corridor we ran into phenomena that seemed specifically designed to either slow us down or assist the ghost-nids in killing usit honestly sounds like your GM just hates you guys at times
>>44029243And when you think you've sealed off all of that silliness, you finally go have a lie-down, only to find, when you close the mirror cabinet, Ursakar E. Creed and the entirety of the 1701st Cadian behind you in the bathroom, wearing disturbing expressions and menacingly brandishing blessed brass knuckles.
>>44029241Two of the delays were frustrating, but non lethal in and of themselves. Twice, immediately after Spot had flown through a doorway, it slammed shut, and re-opened on an all-too-familiar giant room filled with fire when we reached it ourselves. The first time it happened Twitch led us on a winding detour which had involved several ghost-nid attacks in tight corners, the second time Tink just plasma-ed us a new door next to the fiery one.The Daemonthrope, or maybe just our terrible luck, struck again at the midway point of that first leg of our journey, when we all simultaneously ran out of breath and were deafened by a shill and chittering keening sound. It wouldn't have been that much of a problem, except for the fact that it coincided with attacks from our front and rear by waves of gaunts. The sudden slowdown and inability to communicate might've been lethal for our exposed pointmen if the rest of us hadn't been on our toes. Doc and Aimy, operating completely independently, both tossed frags at the pursuing swarm, and grabbed a hold of the motorized Daemonthrope pallet right as Tink floored it and Nubby took care of the stragglers. They arrived just a little too late to prevent the frontal attack from reaching Sarge and Twitch, but Sarge was a big boy who could handle a few scrapes and scratches, and Twitch had just hidden behind the beefy noncom until relief arrived.The final serious phenomena occurred only two rooms from the checkpoint, and very nearly got us all killed.
>>44029243Famed throughout the warp as the only entity that can make a Changer of Ways cry. Like a kicked puppy.
>>44029292And people wonder why we hate redditors
>>44028138Between this mission and sabotaging the Rogue Trader's Gellar field I think Doc has been consistently said to have the lowest SAN. Or greatest SAN loss, I forget which
>yfw all this could have been avoided with a duct-taped Blank Teddy Bear.
>>44029405Looks like Bane Johns found a way to screw the AGP yet again.What a guy
>>44029355We were crossing a storage bay that apparently held tanks of drinking water, headlight fluid, pressurized liquid chlorine, and toothpaste, when a pack of ghost-nids clawed a hole through a door on Aimy's flank. As she started picking the bugs off, a sort of howling spectral gale manifested in the corridor behind the bugs, and three of them were propelled through the hole like angry insectoid cannonballs. One gaunt was shot out of the air, another pancaked against the toothpaste tank, and the third landed on Aimy.Aimy's panicked snapshot missed the gaunt, passed a centimeter in front of Fio's face, and exploded one of the crystal-tipped suppression pylons mounted on the Daeomonthrope's pallet. The lights abruptly went out, frost began to form along the walls, and the bay's vox system began screaming at us in a mix of Jantine Battle-Cant and Hrud. All of us except Aimy, who was trying to keep the gaunt from eating her face, and Nubby, who helpfully shot it off her, activated our tac-lights and scanned the room for any sort of new warpy threat while Fio tried to repair the suppressor and Tink kept the pallet moving. Our rubbernecking was brought to an abrupt halt by three sudden realizations. Firstly, that the ghost-nid on top of Aimy was reforming instead of dissipating into smoke. Secondly, the screaming vox was just a leakage alarm as opposed to some sort of warp phenomena. And finally, that Aimy's shot had terminated in the pressurized chlorine tank.Aimy practically teleported out from under the reforming gaunt, which Nubby shot a few more times for good measure, and we bailed out of that bay so fast that we literally stampeded the nids coming at us from ahead. As we exited Doc attempted to close the bay behind us, only to find a little yellow note apologizing for scrounging the door's control panel. He settled for tossing a nade at the now-reformed gaunt and the other nids that were moving through the gas with impunity.
this thread is delicious
>>44029404Doc was the sanest one when he suggested the sabotage. That was less of an insane moment and more of a "...these guys will just keep trying to fuck us unless we handle them." moment. The kind of thing that you have to have a scary comprehension of reality in order to be willing to do.
>>44029512Do nids have lungs? Would chlorine normally do something to them?
>>44029337Obviously this whole thing was a 13th Black Crusade mission from Abbadon. All they had to do was something nice and simple, so he could get a ship that could FINALLY sneak into the Imperium.When he finally gets the fucking thing, I imagine Abbadon will do his best Sarge impression, with such gems as:>WHY ARE THERE SO MANY PURITY SEALS>WHY DOES THE DOOR LABLED "Danger: Beware of COLRANK" HAVE A ENTIRE GUARD REGIMENT LIVING THERE>WHY DOES THIS SHIP HAVE DOORS THAT OPEN INTO ROOMS FULL OF GREY KNIGHTS TERMINATOR SQUADS>WHY IS THERE A SCOUT TITAN INSIDE BAY 6-C>WHY ARE MY ARMS MISSING AFTER I ENTERED THE ROOM LABELED "Caution: Blood Ravens"
>>44029556Well, let's put it this way:It probably won't actively HELP the 'nids.
>>44029556>>44029580Spoopy ghosts probably dont need to breathe
>>44029570>>WHY ARE MY ARMS MISSING AFTER I ENTERED THE ROOM LABELED "Caution: Blood Ravens"Because Bjorn the Blood Raven was here.
>>44029570>>WHO IN THEIR RIGHT MIND WOULD STEAL A SHIP CARRYING NEWLY BUILT GELLER FIELD GENERATORS?!?
>>44029570>>WHY ARE MY ARMS MISSING AFTER I ENTERED THE ROOM LABELED "Caution: Blood Ravens"
>i swear brother hes real!>you just need to get into some RIP AND TEAR>i..i can hear his little menacing feet at night..i can smell his horrible order and i worship nurgal!>every time i wake up more and more of my gear is replaced with cardboard...HOW DOES HE REMOVE IT FROM ME WHEN ITS PART OF ME!
>>44029676Empirical evidence would suggest a bonesaw and copious amounts of swearing.
>>44029570>WHY IS THERE A SPRINKLER SYSTEM CONTAINING A MIXTURE OF HOLY MACHINE OIL AND HOLY WATER MIXED WITH SACRED INGUENTS>WHAT DO YOU MEAN THAT A SHRINE TO THE EMPEROR IS PROTECTED BY BLANKS?> WHAT DO YOU MEAN THEY ARE NOT BLANKS THEY ARE CULLEXIS ASSASSINS AND SISTERS OF SILENCE?
>>44029512We hit the tilt-corridor checkpoint at a dead sprint with the ghost-nids and gas hard on our heals. It took the armsmen defending the barricade-packed fourway junction a few seconds to register our presence, which was understandable given the way the bugs they were holding off had started reforming as we approached. When the sergeant-at-arms leading the group finally realized we were there, he nearly put a round in the Daemonthrope out of sheer reflex, but Sarge caught him in time, and started belting out orders.Our initial plan had been to take a breather, restock on ammo, and swap out the Pallet's batteries for the ones we'd stashed here, but the reforming nids and the inexorably approaching gas-cloud meant there wasn't time. Each of us grabbed what we could in the the ten seconds it took Sarge to order the armsmen to get ready to bail, preferably to somewhere airtight, and Tink coupled the pallet to the cart-thing waiting at the edge of the tilt-corridor. Fio, still busy trying to fix the psi-suppressor Aimy had shot, screamed at the tech-acolyte holding the replacement batteries to just hop on the cart, and followed the terrified cogboy aboard. An entire thirty seconds after our arrival, the armsmen manning the barricades beat feet. By the forty second mark, a mix of chlorine gas and warp-spawned tyranids had filled the checkpoint. Ten seconds after that, the detpack Twitch had left on the pile of leftover ammo turned the whole place into a gas and gore filled crater. We would've stopped to high-five each other, but we were a little too busy holding on for dear life as we raced down (or up, depending on how you looked at it) the tilt-corridor.
>>44029552Yeah, but Shoggy said he took a huge SAN loss from seeing the aftermath of it or something. Which chapter was that again?
>>44029676The AGP as the unwitting BBEG(s) of a Chaos-themed Dark Heresy session tickles me pink.
>>44029779Gah, should've been clearer. I was supporting the 'greatest SAN loss' part that was mentioned. Doc WAS the sanest one, and he made that decision because of that, but knowing what he'd just done knocked some serious dents into his mental health.
>>44029774Seems you forgot your name there Shoggy
>>44029786All daemon party would be interesting.
>>44029786>Why are there so many purity seals on these detpacks> Wait- so the whole portion of the ship is made of sacntified relics? How is that even possible!> The ship was made from a sanctuary and shrine? Who the fuck made this decision?
>>44029774Now, those of you who haven't been aboard a ship as kludged together as the Occurrence Border might be wondering what "tilt-corridors" are. According to Ol' Bill, they were grav-lifts (shafts with angled grav-plates so you can just walk up them like a corridor instead of waiting for a lift) from back before his time when the Occurrence Border still had an organized ship-wide gravitic field. At some point during the transition to the current ad-hoc system, either some sort of titanic accident or the hard work of one of his predecessors had twisted all four shafts into massive ramps which paradoxically pulled upwards. The end result was that inside the tilt-corridors going up-ship (as we wanted to do) was downhill, and a pretty steep downhill at that.So picture a three hundred meter long slide with a six-person cargo-cart at the top. Now add six guardsmen, a Tau scientist, and a terrified tech-acolyte, and a Daemonthrope-laden pallet. Finally, put a cargo-bay and a ninety degree gravity shift at the bottom, and give the whole thing a push. It was pretty high on the list of the stupidest ways we'd ever traveled, or at the top if you lumped it in with "traversing the warp in a glorified space-hulk", but at least Spot was there to record the terrifying amount of air we got as we reached the bottom of the corridor and shot out into the bay.Now when I say "terrifying amount of air" I mean TERRIFYING. The only reason we didn't hit the 10-meter high ceiling of the cargo bay, was because of the cluster of ghostly gaunts we hit first. We exploded into the bay in a shower of chitin and ichor, sailed over a barricaded group of armsmen, passed just under a massive light fixture, came down on another cluster of ghost-nids, and skidded to a juicy halt in front of the armsmen protecting the doors to the aft cargo-lift.The armsmen stared at us, we stared back, and the elderly engineer fiddling with the doors yelled at everyone to keep it down while he worked.
>>44029774I imagine Hannah's going to have trouble explaining to that Acolyte that he was not, in fact, shouted at by a panicked tau because THERE ARE NO TAU ABOARD THIS SHIP!
>>44029842All Heretic Party, coming soon to a board near you.
>>44029840Whoops, teach me to let chrome update
>>44029786>You hear a noise>i check it out bolter raised>you notice nothing but you suddenly feel lighter>i check my body to make sure im ok>you do a brief look over of yourself..something seems...wrong> instead of wearing power armor you now realize its just pillows duct taped together and in your hands appears to be a rubber chicken.>the pillows and chicken are beeping
>>44029890I'm willing to bet that by the time they make it back to Oak, either the Zoanthrope will no longer be needed or they'll already have another one. And then Sarge will kill someone.
>>44029890>skidded to a juicy haltWhat the HELL did you roll to survive this intact?
>>44029950That, or Oak simply screwed up and wanted a different Nid instead.
>>4402997894 & 89 between Nubby and Tink
>>44029978I'm going to go ahead and guess that fate points were involved.
>>44030019Talk about lucky. I figured you burned a point to stay alive. Do you still have points?
>>44027113Holy shit, I just caught up on this in the archives. I can't believe I'm actually catching one of these.
Shoggy, I got a chem final tomorrow but I'm riding this wild ride to the end.
>>44029890Being uncomfortably aware of the way the tyranid-goo we'd landed in was reforming, we didn't waste any time sitting around boggling at the fact that we were still alive. The cargo-cart was ditched, and we squoze passed the armsmen to the lift door, where the white-haired engineer informed us that it wasn't quite ready yet. Sarge drew a breath and got ready to scream at the geezer about our impending deaths at the claws of a swarm of reanimating warp-bugs, but deflated when Tink, who knew the engineer, quietly explained that it would only result in a lecture about young people and their myriad failings. Left with a lot of unspent rage, Sarge began pouring pulse-fire into the surrounding ghost-nids, and yelled at us to get off our asses and do the same.We all stepped up to help Sarge and the armsmen play whack-a-bug, except for the few of us who had more useful things to do. Tink jumped off his driver's seat on the Pallet, grabbed the replacement batteries from the practically-catatonic tech-acolyte, and began replacing the nearly-expended ones powering the Daemonthrope's stasis unit and the suppressors. Doc attempted to patch the defensive wounds that Aimy had acquired when the gaunt had landed on her, but got told to go fondle someone who didn't have shooting to do, and switched his attention to a badly wounded armsman. Fio held the small tau-ish device he'd been fiddling with up to the busted suppressor, and declared his genius as the dead bugs around us stopped reforming and began to drift apart.
>>44029944Imagine if you will an all heretics party, where the bad guys are >AGP>Blood Ravens>Competent Inquisition MembersThe heretics have to report to instead of OakEither>Arhiman> Cypher> Omegeon> AbbadonThis would be the best game ever.
>>44029935It'd have to be daemons or daemonhosts though. Otherwise you're just playing normal Black Crusade.
>>44030153>declared his geniusFollowed by horrible fail..nids they shoot bees next? Which makes me worry...what part of the ship is nubby now using to store 'is odds an ends?
>>44030153The armsmen cheered as the ghost-nid advance slowed, and so did we when the engineer whacked the door control a few times with a spanner and it began to grind open. No one noticed when one of the tendrils of smoke rising from where the Daemonthrope's wings intersected the stasis field twisted towards the vox-system set in the bay's ceiling. At least not until the vox began screeching a high-pitched chittering sound.Now, an uneducated plebian might have had mistaken the sound coming from the vox for mindless tyranid chittering, but we immediately identified it as binary, and an attempt by the Daemonthrope to control any nearby servitors, servo-skulls, and cogboys. A Guardsman's senses are just that precise. Well, no, actually no they aren't, but it was sort of obvious after the tech-acolyte smashed the psi-suppressor Fio had just fixed.As usual, Twitch was the first to respond, even if he was actually operating under the assumption that the Mechanicus had been allied with the Daemonids, and possibly the Orks, all along, and this was just the first stage of their uprising against the divine light of the Emperor. Luckily, we sorted that out for him before we ran into Jim or Hannah again, and even more luckily (for the tech-acolyte at least) Twitch couldn't get line of sight past our panicking Tau scientist. So instead of blowing off the hapless tech-acolyte's head, Twitch opened fire on the engineer's two servo-skulls, taking them down before they could do any damage to the Pallet. The engineer responded by throwing his spanner at Twitch, but it only bounced off his helmet and the man apologized later, so there were no hard feelings.The rest of us took a little longer than Twitch to react, which meant the tech-acolyte had time to damage another psi-suppressor before Tink brained him with a battery. As the second suppressor failed, a ship-quake shook the bay, and the dead ghost-nids stopped dissipating and began to to flow together into large piles.
>>44030153Either the Tau-ish device blows something up, or everything goes just as planned for the rest of this trip.There are no alternatives in AGP: it either goes just fine, or it all goes horribly wrong.
>>44030264They already shoot something worse than bees, anon>http://wh40k.lexicanum.com/wiki/Fleshborer
>>44030273>The rest of us took a little longer than Twitch to react, which meant the tech-acolyte had time to damage another psi-suppressor before Tink brained him with a battery. As the second suppressor failed, a ship-quake shook the bay, and the dead ghost-nids stopped dissipating and began to to flow together into large piles.MOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE
>>44030320IS that worse than bees, though?
>>44030250could always start with Black Crusade, and then become All Daemon Party. Like how AGP started with Only War, then became Dark Heresy.
>>44030347You tell me
>>44030320pretty sure occurrence border bees would even terrify nids
>>44030273I think we all know it's just a matter of time until the daemoservinids attack.
>>44030409...yeah, bees are worse.
>>44030273When the first tyranid warrior emerged from the goo, and began hosing the barricades with death-spitter rounds, we decided that it was really time that we got moving again, and sprinted for the open lift. Actually it wasn't as unanimous a decision as most of our retreats were, Doc had become rather fixated on the armsmen he was treating, and wound up dragging the partially-disemboweled man along with us onto the lift. Also, as we ran by the half-conscious acolyte, Twitch raised the possibility of continued Daemonthropic possession and lift-sabotage, and suggested that blowing the cogboy's head head off was "the only way to be sure". Nubby ended the ethical debate before it started by kicking the tech-acolyte into the floor-hatch the engineer had opened as an escape route for himself and the armsmen. Judging by the crashes and bangs, the maintenance shaft went down three or four levels, but cogboys tend to be fairly sturdy, and he looked fine when we saw him again a few weeks later. Though possibly that had been some other tech-acolyte who was terrified of us and had an impressive collection of ladder-rung shaped dents.Once aboard the lift, we shut the door on the deteriorating situation in the cargo-bay, and began our slow ascent to the main cargo corridor. Our ride was accompanied by the sound of thousands of ghost-nid clawing at the shaft's doors, and this was made even worse by the mixture of cheery music and daemonic screeches playing over the lift's speakers. Those of us who weren't attempting to save arbitrarily-acquired armsmen, repair the damaged suppressors, or comm the Cogitator Adept for a sitrep, scanned the shaft above us, and tried to anticipate where the first breakthrough would occur. It was a very high stress situation, especially after Sarge learned that the checkpoint at the top of the lift was under heavy attack, which is why several of us reflexively started shooting the walls when the lift suddenly stopped and the lights went out.
Imagine the look on the faces of the Inquisitorial Tribunal.A millennia of experience between them.And still WTF.
>>44030448There were a few seconds of wild panic, and then Tink and Fio got the wide-angle illuminators on their drones activated, and we realized a few things. Firstly, the sound of angry tyranids clawing at the shaft had vanished, as had the re-assuring background noise of our combeads and the humming buzz of the overloaded psi-suppressors, but not the annoying lift-music. Secondly, the shaft walls were bleeding, and it was human blood instead of tyranid ichor for a change, also the tormented-looking faces that occasionally pressed out of the gore then faded again didn't look insectoid either. Finally, and most worryingly to those of us who knew the Occurrence Border's foibles, the level we'd stalled at didn't have a big cargo-bay sized door, just an ordinary looking hatch. Oh and Doc's armsman was dead, but that probably had more to do with the cantaloupe-sized hole in his gut than anything eldritch.Fio, after verifying that the psi-suppressors were still functioning, just not being overloaded for a change, jumped at the chance to do some repairs, and completely ignored the totally-normal-door. The rest of us gathered around it, and held a completely silent debate, which ended with our fearless leader stepping forward to open it while we got ready to blow apart whatever horrors waited on the other side.As the door swung open, we all lowered our weapons. Twitch whimpered, Aimy and Doc swore, Tink set Spot to "record", and Sarge facepalmed, and Nubby cheerily waved at the smoldering, bearded skeleton at the head of the poker table, who laughed and waved back.
>>44030503>and Sarge facepalmed, and Nubbybahhhh, why do I always notice these AFTER I postStand by for awesome art btw.
>>44030503>bearded skeleton at the head of the poker table, who laughed and waved back.Wait, nobody who had died had a beard...UNLESS THEY WERE DEAD THE WHOLE TIME!!!
>>44030503Yeah, was waiting for the eternal poker party
>>44030565Crisp had a Beard
>>44030565Crisp, the cook with a flame thrower did. Read the archives.
>>44030565Crisp died. He had a beard.
>>44030503Our arrival didn't go unnoticed by the other players at the poker table. The charred skeleton with a chainsword at his side, turned and waved as well, and the exit-wound-faced man on the far side raised his beer to us before messily dumping it into the approximate area of his mouth. This caught the attention of the last man at the table, a massive angry-looking fellow in Scout armor, who looked surprisingly normal if you ignored the telephone-pole sized tyranid talon lodged in his chest. He turned towards the door, knocking drinks and chips everywhere with his chest-talon, then went wide-eyed as he saw us. The man immediately leapt to his feet and began striding towards the door while ranting about cowards, scavengers, and heretics.We automatically raised our weapons again, but before the ranting scout marine got much closer, the sword-bearing skeleton and nearly-headless guardsman shared an exasperated look, got up, and grabbed him by the elbows. They didn't actually have enough strength to stop the scout, but then the bearded skeleton came over and pulled down on the talon sticking out of the large man's back, causing him to topple backwards. The scout marine was dragged back to the table, screaming at us the whole way, mostly about his sergeant. Specifically how our incompetence had gotten cut in half, the way we'd lost, stolen, or sold most of his gear and his legs, and how we'd finally left him, alone and dying, in a daemonically tainted hole. This annoyed Doc, who thought he'd done a pretty good job keeping Gravis sort-of alive all things considered, and said so.
>>44030606>>44030609>>44030617For some reason, I thought Crisp was clean shaven
>>44030635Who is exit-wound face?
>>44030635Oh that scout marine.
>>44030635I love that art
>>44030704Heavy, the first AGP death
>>44030704Heavy, I think.
>>44030565It's Crisp dude. He's one of the regulars at the skelly poker nights.
>>44030704Heavy. He got his head blown off by Nutjob the psyker.
>>44030635>>44030650Well at least it looks like he lost some weight.>>44030704Heavy, first guardsman to die>>44030635Seriously, this is fucking awesome. The poster is even up there in the corner.
>>44030704Heavy, Nutjob shot him in the back of the head.
>>44030635>Specifically how our incompetence had gotten cut in half,So they halved their incompetence?
>>44030635confirmed agp meets shoggy one day tenth level warpfuckery ensues
>>44030635Some epic art indeed!!
>>44030754>Secundus cares notDid he poop there?
>>44030635>dat poster10/10 art
>>44030635Crisp has a dead man's handLooks like heavy has a straight
>>44030635I love everything about this picture. I do wonder who defaced the inquisitorial recruitment poster though.
>>44030635I need this in poster form for my wall
>>44030635That drawfag is still around? Haven't seen his art since SWQ.
>>44030898Every last guardsman in there.
>>44030635On the list of sane things to do, arguing with a dead Scout Marine is pretty close to the bottom, but that didn't stop Doc; or Nubby and Tink for that matter. All three of them started throwing excuses, explanations, and insults at the impaled Scout, who expanded his list of grievances to include: being too cowardly or stupid to shoot down a flyrant, abandoning a shuttle full of his battle-brothers in a xenos-filled backwater, and getting him stuck in some shitty poker room for all eternity. Nubby responded by calling his Primarch fat.The bearded skeleton, who'd been snickering at the exchange and Sarge's pained reaction to it, fell over laughing at that remark, and the argument petered out. Once he'd regained his breath, the skeleton apologized for the new guy's complete lack of perspective, and then immediately went on to congratulate us for finally doing something about "Frank". Since he gestured towards our pallet when he said that, we assumed that he meant the Deamonthrope, and didn't ask why it had a name. Sarge adopted his best poker face, thanked the skeleton for his praise, suggested that it time we got moving again, and began to shut the door. The bearded skeleton held up a finger, and suggested we take the lift all the way up to level 39. Tink, ever the pedant, pointed out that the lift only went to level 26.5, which prompted yet another bout of knee slapping laughter from the skeleton.Acting as if we'd said the most hilariously stupid thing he'd ever heard, the bearded skeleton repeated Tink's statement to his three companions, two of which joined him in laughing. After a few seconds, the faceless guardsman gurgled something, which prompted the spokes-skeleton to make a "get a load of this guy" gesture at him, and ask us if we minded. Without even thinking, Sarge responded with shrug, then flinched backwards as the head-shot corpse suddenly appeared at the doorway, and began to lean out into the lift.
>>44027335>...since the Xenology Adept kept telling us absolutely could not possess Tyranids.UhDaemons absolutely could not possess Tyranids?>>44027748>...knowing that you're doing something wrong wrong...Might wanna excise one o' those 'wrong's>>44027906Reread the archived first thread; there's already a few stories of what these gloriously crazy bastards do in Shadowrun.
>>44030995One of those wrongs is heretical. The other has a head full of Nitroglycerin.BLAM! Carefully, Grammerssar.
>>44030968>and began to lean out into the lift.that's never happened before
>>44030995The manthings know! Shutclose it downquick!
>>44030968apparently hell has 39 levels and the AGP is on crash course to the last one
>>44030995No, he's saying that they're doing something wrong the wrong way.
>>44030747>>44030750Technically it wasn't actually Nutjob but rather the enemy Nutjob had switched minds with as a result of psychic phenomena.
>>44030968Talking to the familiar denizens of the poker room was one thing, but one of them coming out was quite another. Most of us raised our weapons, and Sarge tried to slam the door, but Twitch grabbed his arm, and gestured at the rest of us to put the guns away and back up. The nearly-headless guardsman gave Twitch an appreciative sounding gurgle, and reached an arm out towards the lift-control panel.As the corpse's arm passed over the threshold its flesh on it began to rot and bubble, and the lights on the drones and our armor began to flicker. With a cracking pop, the annoying lift music cut out, and was replaced by immensely creepy children's songs, which the blood-faces on the shaft's walls began singing along to. Twitch began rocking back and forth and singing along as well, and for some reason Fio joined in too. Aimy told them both to stop being crazy; prompting Twitch to start giggling and Fio to complain about how he was just trying to fit in, and we really needed to document what was and wasn't considered crazy in our backwards culture.When its rotting arm reached the control-panel, the head-shot guardsman began leaning his head out to get a look at what he was doing. We all reflexively looked away, and didn't see exactly what happened next, but there was an indescribably foul smell, and a layer of frost formed on everything in the lift except for the Daemonthope's stasis unit. Then the frost and smell abruptly vanished, the singing stopped, and we looked back to see the guardsman lumbering back into the poker room, looking as normal as anyone with a massive crater in their head can.The charred spokes-skeleton laughed at us, gestured towards the button labeled "39" that had appeared at the top of the control panel, asked if that was better, and told us to have fun. Behind him, the sword-bearing skeleton paused from restraining the Scout and waved, then told us not to fuck up because he had money on us.
>>44031129>twicth began singing alongtwitch plz no no die today
>>44031129>then told us not to fuck up because he had money on us.fucking awsome
>>44031129so........................is this considered "Good Heresy"?
>>44031129THANKS MISTER SKELTALS
>>44031201I honestly have no idea how they guardsmen could survive without Twitch. He's got all the explosives and he's always right.
>>44031040IIRC Crisp poked his head out the door in order to deliver that-one-Khornate-who-was-a-pretty-cool-dude's warning in Discount Spaceship.
>>44031211No it's divine intervention.
>>44030995>Reread the archived first thread; there's already a few stories of what these gloriously crazy bastards do in Shadowrun.More than one? I've only read the story with the drones.
Man, the NPCs have been seriously pulling their weight recently.
i have a full AGP boner. first live thread for me
>>44030154You're pretty much describing Khornette Quest.
>>44031211These are the long dead spirits of loyal Imperial vassals providing aid to loyal Imperial servants in dire need of aid.Praise the Emperor, for he has sent his soldiers from beyond the grave to aid the living.Even in death, they still serve.
>>44031225Shoggy and Failer10 have pointed out repeatedly that about two-thirds of the latter's planning was to avoid Twitch short-circuiting every plot by adding detpacks.
>>44030367Black Crusade as a system doesn't exactly reward working together. So unless you want all only one type of daemon (i.e. bloodletter, plaguebearer, etc) you have to skip the possession/materialization stuff. Plus BC games (in my experience) never last long at all.
>>44031129The last thing we saw before Sarge closed the door was the two skeletons levering the Scout up, and the head-shot guardsman sitting down at the bar next to a vague ghostly shape that hadn't been there earlier. We noted the absence of Doc's recently-expired armsman, and unanimously agreed to never speak of him again.When the door was firmly shut, we all stood around waiting to see if anything else was going to happen. After a few seconds, Nubby cheerily announced that "dat wen' awlrigh'", clomped over to the lift-control panel, and pressed the new button before anyone could think to stop him. All of us swore at the little trooper as the lift launched upwards like a booster rocket had been attached to it, and a sensation disturbingly similar to a bad warp-transit rolled over us. It took us about eight seconds for the lift to reach level 39. This was admittedly a great improvement over its usual speed, but that didn't quite make up for the general unpleasantness of the ascent, and the way we were all launched a meter into the air when it slammed to a stop.We staggered to our feet, attempted to look around, and realized that we were somehow unable to direct our gaze at anything but the floor and the wall a the front of the lift, which held yet another door that didn't belong in a lift-shaft. Nubby scampered towards the lift-control panel again, only to find himself suspended in the air by his collar. Sarge handed him to Aimy, walked over the panel, and briefly perused the options before giving up and just hitting the "open door" button. It slid open to reveal a short unlit hallway that was just large enough for the Pallet, and another door. Lacking any better ideas, we entered the hallway, and were totally unsurprised when the door slammed shut behind us. What DID surprise us was the words "OUTER AIRLOCK DOOR (for real this time)" stenciled on its inside. Tink spoke for all of us when he suggested getting through the inner door as fast as possible.
>>44031211Big E is keeping them around for the emprah loves all his little guardsmen. Except the space marine scout,hes exiled there until hes a proper guardsman.
>>44031247Unrelated, but twodee's shadowrun storytime was full of AGP level hilarity.
>>44031277Detpacks are the driving force of the plot. Heretic.
>>44031279>"OUTER AIRLOCK DOOR (for real this time)" stenciled on its insideo_OThat DM is spooky good.
>>44031269Being ordered around by Iggy would be amusing. Plus Ordo Chronos shenanigans.
Spot was recording all that, right?
>>44031385Oh for fuck's sake leave them alone and just enjoy the story.
>>44031279On the far side of the door, we found a bunk-room full of confused crewmen. When asked, they confirmed that we were indeed on level 39, and only a short distance away from the main lift. Sarge reported our position to the Cogitator Adept, who presumably relayed it to everyone else while we resumed our journey to the Astropathic Sanctum.Our pace was much slower that it had been before. Partially because we didn't have a pre-mapped route anymore, but mostly because there were no ghost-nids up there to attack us. Also, it seemed like Fio had done a great job of repairing the psi-suppressors: they were nearly silent and nothing weird was happening at all. We practically strolled through bays and corridors, congratulating ourselves, and praising the generosity of overcooked skeletons as we walked. This light mood lasted until we reached the entrance to the main lift. As the door opened to reveal the lift shaft, the tendrils of smoke drifting from the Daemonthrope's wings suddenly snaked around, and shot downwards. Thirteen levels below us, the tendrils pooled against the roof of the shrine that'd been built over the Cogtain's crater, and then melted through it in a burst of black and green light. A screeching that sounded like a cross between binary, tyranid, and daemonic echoed up the shaft, and everything very abruptly went to shit. The psi-suppressors began making an overloaded whine, and the two that Fio had just repaired exploded. Fragments of metal and crystal bounced off our carapace armor (and Spot's tau-metal chassis), but Fio and the delicate machinery on the Pallet weren't anywhere near as protected. The little xenos received several nasty gashes on his face and arms, two more suppressors began spewing clouds of smoke, and the stasis unit began emitting a steadily-rising whine that was horribly familiar to us.Down in the shaft, several things that sounded bigger and warpy-er than any ghost-nid we'd encountered began to howl.
>>44031385>2015>Giving this much of a shit
>>44031339for fucks sake, you're on an image board.
>>44030438Japanese acid hornets
>>44031397>>44031430You can leave too. Fuck off
I'm really thinking you guys need to just ram the ship into a star once this is done. It's tainted to the point that it's value is really dropping.
>>44031431Then why didn't you post an image either?
>>44031429>tyraseriknarloctitan?the boning continues!
>>44031472Get the fuck out.
>>44031129>prompting Twitch to start giggling and Fio to complain about how he was just trying to fit inMy little Xeno can't be this adorable.
>>44031472>encouraging the use of emoticons on a fucking imageboard.Literal cancer.
>>44031305Can vouch for Shadowrun Storytime being totally awesome. It's the entire reason I started writing up our campaigns really.
everyone, calmly stop shitpostingdon't give a reason for Twitch to hit the detonators for this thread,
>>44031339>>44031385>>44031397>>44031430>>44031431>>44031452>>44031472>>44031475>>44031502Why are you niggers being such faggots?
>>44031512Oh good god, can you imagine if Fio was female?
>>44031129So when you said Twitch was dangerously low on sanity last time, how far did this episode push him?
Shoggy should stop posting until these cunts stop being cunts.That'd show em.
>>44031537If someone from reddit wants to come in, fine.If nobody tells him when he's acting like a faggot, however, he'll never learn.
Shoggy, if you were ever to compile this (as well as all your stuff from other settings) into one giant compendium book of short stories, I would %100 buy that book.
>>44031561>2015>Letting the terrorists win
>>44031561By that logic, soldiers should shoot themselves until the enemy stops attacking.
>>44031537When the newfags stop shitting up the thread with garbage and learn to lurk the fuck more.
>>44031429Gotta sleep. Can't prolong anymore.This better still be here in the morning.Shoggy you're the best
>>44031593Hey, It works for the imperial guard leadership
how do i find the shoggy shadowrun write up?
>>44031472Because he has the sense to not post emoticons on an image board you tit. Seriously, fuck off back to whatever cancer ridden shithole you came from. This place is already bad enough as is without you in it.>>44031535We were already on autosage before the shitstorm. Shitposting at this point does nothing besides make the archived thread look like shit.
>>44031578Derailing a thread to accuse others of faggotry is still faggotry
>>44031578>not realizing every one on 4chin is a fagitIgnore posts you dont like and promptly move on since ironic shit posting is till shitposting.
>>44031589Could definitely work with a bit of editing.
CAUGHT LIVEI THINK
>>44031528Have you ever met 2D? Or spoken to him at all?You two are the two best writefags to ever emerge from this den of faggotry
I can feel the shoggy to be continued post overtaking meit is not good pain
>>44031429Now, despite occasional bouts of irrationality and insanity, we WERE a bunch of semi-professional badasses, so we didn't just stand around panicking over how screwed we were. Within five seconds of the suppression failure, we had four guns pouring pulse-fire into the indistinct forms crawling up the lift shaft, and Doc and Tink were seeing to Fio and the damaged Pallet.Doc immediately diagnosed Fio's injuries as non-life-threatening, administered a few bandages and Tau-safe painkillers, and then steered the little xenos over to where Tink was doing his best to keep anything else from exploding. The top priority was the stasis unit, which was making the telltale sound of an imminent flicker. Given that this unit didn't have an array of grav-plates to keep anything inside it from escaping, Tink was operating under the assumption that any flicker over a second long would result in an enraged xenos daemonhost flying into the air and tearing us all to bloody pieces. He and Fio, who was badly shaken but still able to help, set to work stabilizing, splicing, and other technical shit, while Doc ran over to join the rest of us in our delightful game of "shoot the horrible monster before it closes to melee range and kills you"."Horrible monster" was really the best description we could come up with for what was climbing the shaft around the rising lift platform. By the time Doc had arrived we'd killed at least six of them between us (that's three for Aimy, the showoff, and one each for everyone else), but we still had no idea what the hell the things were. We could see tyranid chitin and claws, but they were mixed in with tentacles and massive bulging eyes, and the whole mess seemed to be covered with clouds of obscuring smoke. Twitch would up triumphantly declaring them to be his long-predicted Daemonids; none of us bothered to argue with him.
>>44031589Contact Fantasy Flight Games and let them know. The more people that say shoggy's stuff doesn't suck, the more likely we are to see it in something or maybe as a story.
>>44031630>>44031632Ignoring faggotry from people who clearly don't know any better and can, with time, become productive posters is fucking retarded.Besides, we're in autosage and Shoggy is based enough to ignore shitstorms.
>>44031632>>44031630>encouraging emoticons on a FUCKING IMAGEBOARDFuck off back to tvtropes. You obviously came from there.
>>44031429I imagine that at times like this the need for immediate action is the only thing preventing everyone from breaking down in tears.
Oh noOur thread has obviously somehow been pulled into the madness of the warp along with the AGPtruly this is level 10 warpfuckery
>>44031755That and a constant mantra of "it could always be worse!"
>>44031687>Twitch would up triumphantly declaring them to be his long-predicted DaemonidsNo Orks?Is Twitch losing his touch, or are they coming later?
>>44031589It'll at least be compiled, whether it's ever published on paper will be another matter.>>44031622Beware, sort of shitty.>>44031670Nope. I keep thinking I should track him down and offer to help set up an HTML archive for posterity, but then I remember I'm behind on writing and try to get back to work.
How did Twitch not line the lofts with detpacks weeks before?I figured he had the whole shit rigged to blow, and has a secret, DOOMSDAY button somewhere on his person.
>>44031688You got a link or something? I will fucking spam that shit if it means I can buy APG the novel series, or even see it in some splat books.
>>44031808Thanks keep doing good work or bad work or whatever makes you happy
>>44031728Reminds me. Someone's gunna need to update 1d4chan section for fio.
>>44031823>on his personthis is the Occurance Border. It's very likly one of the "Do no press, ever" buttons does the exact same doomsday thing, but without using all the precious Detpacks
>>44031528Shit, I was sure you were 2D. >>44031355I'm thinking KQ goes Back To The Future now. The gang minus Ara (just to trigger that one waifufaggot...) in a Delorian with Doc would be epic.
>>44031823Twitch secretly replaced the entire ship with nothing but detpacks.
>>44031687Unlike most our battles with the ghost-nids, our defense of the level 39 lift door (not a battle name for the history books, that) wasn't a cakewalk. Whatever the things climbing up the shaft were, they could take an awful lot of fire, and they moved far faster than anything their size had any right to. We operated as efficiently as possible, calling targets, maintaining fire discipline, and making heavy use of of Spot's marker-thingy, but they steadily gained ground on us, especially where the rising lift platform (a half-shaft wall-crawler, picture a metal rectangle with MASSIVE gears on three sides) blocked our line of sight.To make matters worse, the Daemonthrope was acting all sorts of uppity. Tink and Fio managed to prevent a stasis flicker, thank the Emperor, but the damned bug was still able to inflict all sorts of inconvenient minor phenomena on us, and we could feel it trying to worm its way into our minds. Presumably it was trying to command us to do its bidding, but unlike the daemons we'd heard about from other Inquisitorial agents, this thing apparently only knew how to speak in binary and tyranid. So it was mostly just incoherent psychic screeching, but it was still very distracting, and left us all with massive headaches, plus a vague hunger for human flesh and motor oil.So it was pretty obvious to all of us that our situation wasn't sustainable, but luckily it didn't have to be. We really only had to hold out long enough for the lift to reach us, and for us to ride it up to the bridge level, where it was a short sprint to the former Astropathic Sanctum. Not an easy task by any means, but one that was definitely possible. Well, at least we hoped it was possible, because the only other option was setting off the failsafe Twitch had wired to the Daemonthrope's stasis unit, and it would REALLY suck if we wound up just killing the thing after hauling it halfway across the galaxy...
>>44031852Some good came from this shitshow.That's a first....
>>44031687Their parents must be so proud.
>>44031944It took an absolutely grueling three minutes for the lift to clank its way up to us, but we managed to hold off the Daemonids (or whatever) until it reached us. We piled aboard and switched to a much-less efficient omnidirectional defense of the edges of the platform, which we immediately realized was not going to be enough to keep them from catching us before we reached the bridge. Not liking the idea of fighting 3-meter tall monsters as they climbed over the edge of the platform and directly into melee range, Sarge ordered the deployment of our remaining grenades and as many of Twitch's detpacks as he could use without collapsing a wall.The wave of explosions that rolled down the shaft was like a miniature artillery barrage. It was immensely satisfying to watch bug after bug being knocked off the walls to plummet to the bottom of the shaft. The distant sound of their enraged howls ending in gooey, cracking crashes warmed our hearts, but not as much as what we saw when the smoke cleared: the massed concussive force and the impacts of their falling companions had dislodged almost every one of the climbing Daemonids. We began picking off the last stragglers, and for a few seconds actually thought we'd bought enough time to reach our destination unmolested. Then the tendrils of smoke drifting down from the Daemonthope twisted into the giant pile of ichor and limbs at the bottom of the shaft, and something freaking massive pulled itself together. It rose out of the goo, turned a horned head towards us, and spread wings that touched the edges of the shaft. The five of us looking over the edge swore, as what looked for all the world like a winged hive tyrant with extra eyes and tentacles launched itself upwards.
>>44031862> "Wait a minute, Doc. What are you talking about? What happens to us in the future? Do we become bitches like No-horn or something'?"> "No, no, no, no, no, Cinder. Both you and Iggy turn out fine. It's your Nids, Marty! Something's gotta be done about your Nids!"
>>44032044I'm sure there have been more persistent sons of bitches out there, but it's difficult to think of any right now
>>44032044>The five of us looking over the edge swore, as what looked for all the world like a winged hive tyrant with extra eyes and tentacles launched itself upwards.If there was ever a time to HANDLE IT!, now is it
>>44032044We all immediately opened fire on full auto, just indiscriminately hosing the daemonic Flyrant with as much pulse-fire as possible, which accomplished very little aside from making it angry. It was hard to tell whether the thing was shrugging off our fire or regenerating its injuries, but the end result was the same, and Sarge quickly ordered a change of tactics. Tink ran over and joined us, nailing the Flyrant with big 'ol balls of armor-piercing plasma, while the rest of us focussed our fire on Spot's markerlight. Our target was the thing's wings, specifically the joint where the left one connected to its shoulder, which we figured would be a rather delicate and vulnerable spot in the Flyrant's armor. This proved true, unfortunately the result when we finally burned through was disappointing: the wing did sheer off and drop down the shaft, but the Flyrant didn't follow it down. The Deamonthrope's smokey tendrils coalesced around the bloody joint, and then sprang out to form a new wing before the beast had fallen more than a meter. With what was unquestionably a laugh, the Flyrant resumed its flight.We were understandably frustrated by this development, but not defeated. We shot the smokey wing a little, just to see if that would work, and when it didn't we shifted our fire to the other wing, mostly out of stubbornness. Once that wing had reformed out of smoke too, and the Flyrant had let out another horrible daemonic laugh, we began directing out fire at the little we could see of its head. Well, most of us did, Nubby and Twitch decided that the Emperor could worry about the structural integrity of the lift shaft, and began unloading the demolitions trooper's pack.
>>44032044Damn, Smokey is no longer playing Mr. Nice Daemon anymore.
>>44032044I swear to god Oak's friend better have given each some pretty good shit for dealing with this shit because god fucking damn.
>>44032114When in doubt, C4.
>>44032114>Nubby and Twitch decided that the Emperor could worry about the structural integrity of the lift shaft, and began unloading the demolitions trooper's pack.
>>44032114The first detpack pegged the Flyrant on the tip of its pointy head, and knocked it half a meter downwards when it detonated, but didn't do more than blacken and crack then thing's chitinous armor. Before those cracks could heal though, a second pack exploded in the air just behind it, damaging it further and temporarily disrupting the solidity of its wings.Now, if Twitch hadn't been running low on munitions (it sounds impossible, I know, but several weeks of constant fighting was enough to run down even his stockpiles), this renewed explosive assault might have been enough to stop the Flyrant. Unfortunately, he and Nubby ran out of detpacks far before the giant daemonic bug ran out of whatever kept it alive. That didn't mean Twitch was out of explosives though, just ones that could easily be used against a moving target: when the Flyrant came through the ninth detpack explosion looking as pissed as ever, he instructed Nubby to grab a few parts from Tink or Fio, and began messing with the mixed assortment of mines he had left.Of course the rest of us weren't just standing around while this went on, we kept putting fire into the Flyrant's head and shoulders, we just had no idea if it was actually accomplishing anything. By our reckoning we'd done far more damage than it'd taken to kill the non-daemonic Flyrant that'd bisected Sergeant Gravis, but even the gaping holes left by Tink's weapon seemed to be filling in almost as fast as we inflicted them.Nubby quickly acquired the parts Twitch wanted, and then ran around collecting everyone's leftover flash and smoke grenades. Mind you, he didn't bother to ask us for them, the little klepto just sort of drifted by like a rancid breeze and they were gone. Anyway, everything even vaguely explosive was loaded into Twitch's pack, the makeshift detonator was rigged, and the improvised bomb was placed at the edge of the lift, where Tink threw a sizable wrench into the plan by refusing to attach it to Spot.
>>44031522/a/ go die
cmon I have to go to sleep hurry shoggy
>>44032209>Attach bomb to tink>Throw tink down
>>44032209>Tink threw a sizable wrench into the plan by refusing to attach it to Spot.Was it a POWER WRENCH?
>>44032209>Tink threw a sizable wrench into the plan by refusing to attach it to Spot.Ha, I knew the footage would never be seen by anyone
>>44032209Do you remember exactly how many explosives he kept on him at all times? The number is surely staggering but I am really curious to know what that number is.
>>44032235NO. DONT REGENERATE IT. LET THE SHIT DIE.
>>44032248Whatever poor tribunal had to deal with their case got footage from earlier missions. Does Tink back up whatever memory banks spot has?
>>44032235Did I hurt your precious fee-fee's?
>>44032209So right there, with all of us still firing our weapons on full-auto, and with the Flyrant closing in on us, Tink and Twitch started screaming at eachother like a pair of five year olds. Twitch said that his bomb HAD to be set off right up against the Flyrant's slightly-less-armored underside, and Tink was equally adamant that Spot 2.0 wouldn't be sent off to the same explosive death as the original Spot. It was one of those philosophical thingies, y'know with an unstoppable madman and an unmovable idiot or something like that, and there was NOT time for this shit.Realizing that trying to argue with either of them would waste seconds we didn't have, Sarge grabbed the bag-bomb and announced his intention to bounce it off the wall below us, and told Twitch to start a countdown. This was, of course, a terrible idea: bags of explosives with jury-rigged detonators are known for their bouncing capabilities in the same way that Ogryns are known for their rapier wit. But Sarge was already hefting the bag, and he WAS the boss, so we just went with it.As Twitch counted down, Doc and Aimy each grabbed one of Sarge's legs so he could lean out over the edge, Tink hastily recalled Spot to safe distance, and Nubby helpfully reminded everyone how much it would suck if Sarge missed. Sarge swung the bag back and forth by its straps, gauging its weight, the speed of the incoming Flyrant, and the angle he'd have to hit the wall at, and then as the countdown reached five, decided "to hell with this" and just dropped the thing.The bomb-bag did not sail through the air, or tumble through space, or anything else poetic-sounding. It just dropped straight down the shaft like a backpack full of explosives, passing bare centimeters in front of the Flyrant's face, and jerked to a halt as one of its straps caught on the daemonic horns the bug had instead of the usual head-spike.I like to imagine it stared at the bag cross-eyed for a second, as it swung there, beeping.
>>44032382>posting Jimmies past 2012Now I know you're a newfag.
>>44032396What was the roll, I gotta know.
>>44032396Despite the bomb-bag not being positioned in what Twitch had deemed the "sweet spot", the explosion still laminated the Flyrant across three of the shaft's walls. It was a HIGHLY satisfying result, and we would've paused for a second to congratulate ourselves, except for the fact that the entire shaft was making ominous creaking noises, and the thick layer of ichor and chunky bits was writhing and bubbling. Within seconds the whole mess had erupted into those hand-sized bugs that the Daemonthrope liked to summon from time to time, and the last portion of our trip up the lift was spent frantically shooting and stomping the onrushing swarm. It wasn't as serious a threat as anything else the Daemonthrope had thrown at us, but that final attack was enough to keep us busy until we reached the top of the shaft, and lent us all sorts of motivation to keep moving after we'd reached the bridge. We sprinted through the Occurrence Border's bridge with a ravenous tide of insects behind us, and hundreds more crawling out of every niche and shadow in the room. The bridge officers and their armsmen, who'd apparently been too busy doing naval things to help us with the daemonic Flyrant, ran around screaming and shooting, while we weaved through them and towards the door to the Astropathic Sanctum. Perhaps sensing that it was running out of time, the Daemonthrope began emitting a constant stream of inconveniencing phenomena. We skidded across patches of ice, were buffeted by blasts of wind, suffered dozens of painful electrical shocks, and endured the most godawful psychic racket, until we finally reached the door Jim was holding open for us.
>>44032447W- What gun fires those?
>>44032498Probably something that the Emperors Children would make.
>>44032498It's a dragon dildo box. So it'd contain fake semen and eggs.
>>44032498Sexual assault rifle.
>>4403245530-something > Fate reroll of 84
>>44032447That's a big box.
>>44032586I thought rolling high was bad in Dark Heresy?
>>44032618It is. All the 40k RPGs are roll under systems.
>>44032575Somehow, I knew this existed. I did not know it was so perfect.
>>44032618The important thing is the bad thing happened to the enemy, and not Sarge.
>>44032478The Sanctum was a hemispherical room with a massive wire and gross-stain covered chair in the middle. The floor was covered with taped-down wires, chalk marks, and a small pile of furniture and clothes that'd probably belonged to the dead Astropath. As we entered the room, Jim slammed the door behind us, Fumbles jumped out of the chair, and Tink brought the pallet to a skidding stop.Power cords were swapped, all of us got a grip on the Daemonthrope's stasis unit, and with a quick heave, it was deposited on the ex-Asrtopath's chair, where it sat at a very awkward looking angle. As we did the the heavy lifting, Fio ran around to the back side of the chair, where a disorganized pile of Imperial and Tau tech sat at the center of a web of cables which ran up the domed ceiling. The Tau scientist flipped a switch, and let out a panicked scream as nothing happened, then Fumbles plugged the cord one of us had kicked loose back in, and the pressure of the Daemonthrope's mind vanished.And that was the end of it, right there. The bugs in the bridge disappeared in puffs of smoke, the majority of the phenomena manifesting throughout the ship vanished, and all across the ship the ghost-nids lost both their focus and solidity, and stopped re-appearing after death. The Captain, who'd been pushed all the way back into the Gellar Field Generator, launched an immediate counter attack, which we decline to participate in on account of how the bridge-lift was probably broken and we were too tired to handle 60 flights of stairs.We all just sat on the floor of the sanctum, utterly exhausted, watching Tink, Fio, Jim, and Fumbles argue about why the warp-presence-shroud Fio had built around his chunk of wraithbone was acting as a massive, daemon only, psi-suppressor. They seemed very agitated about the whole thing, but the rest of us really didn't care. As far as we were concerned, it just worked, which meant that we won, which meant that it was time for a nap.
>>44032644They why did the high roll succeed or the low roll require rerolling?
I'm just waiting for them to get to Oaks research base only to have the Deamonthrope merge with that weird Necron cube thing and start producing an unstoppable tide of Daemonidcrons.
>>44032586>>44032618>>44032644Sorry, you caught me, I don't record the rolls, just high vs. low and when fate is spent, so I occasionally fuck up and do things like forget the bullshit inverted stuff. (That is my biggest gripe with the system by the way, rolling LOW just seems wrong)
>>44032679The scatter could have worked to their favor.
>>44032669Okay, that unfortunately is where I've got to pause long enough to fix the horrible mess that is the epilogue. (seriously I didn't realize I was THAT drunk when I wrote them)I'll toss them up here as I finish them, but being over the bump limit might complicate things.If I don't manage to get all 5ish up in time (or I fall asleep), I'll just toss a quick thread up during my lunch break tomorrow.
>>44032770>just five more parts of tyranid deliveryyou can do it shoggycut corners like a true guardsmen would
>>44032770It'll be easy to tell if you don't get it done because the sound of hearts breaking all across the world will be loud
>>44032770Keep up the good job, this has got to be the longest AGP chapter yet.
>>44032770Shoggy is a benevolent god, Yay!
>>44032809no i want the whole story told by shoggyput the effort in that you would for all your previous posts
Shoggy, you're the guardsman
>>44028559All NPCS are handled by the GM.If it's a valid thing for the NPC to think of, is that the GM helping you?
>>44033137Yes, I would say that's the GM doing it. But they've stated that the players were allowed to play the NPCs to an extent, and ideas would be assigned to whichever PC or NPC would be likely to have it. "Wouldn't it be cool if so-and-so did whatever?" was the example given.
>>44033010Yeah. I honestly don't know if tinks cheese offsets the evil, evil inspiration his paranoia rolls give the gm
>>44029355>Twitch had just hidden behind the beefy noncom until relief arrived.Is an Interrogator really a noncom?
>>44033417Not >>44033384 but honestly when I'm reading these half asleep the two characters blend into a single entity named Twink in my head
>>44030503THE UNIVERSE IS SAVED! THE WARRIORS OF THE POKER ROOM HAVE AWAKENED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
>>44029774>hard on our healsI point it out only because you say you welcome criticism and editing. Keep going, I"m laughing hysterically here.
>>44033417Woah I never said it wasn't FUN. I just meant mechanically. But mechanics aren't the only important thing. I wouldn't trade Tink for anything
>>44033464Noncom is a state of existence not a rank. Sarge will be a Noncom forever regardless of what shitty jobs they shove on him.Actually I think the "shitty job that has to be done" just reinforces his non-com status.
>>44033545Indeed.>>44029890>We exploded into the bay in a shower of chitin and ichor, sailed over a barricaded group of armsmen, passed just under a massive light fixture, came down on another cluster of ghost-nids, and skidded to a juicy halt in front of the armsmen protecting the doors to the aft cargo-lift.Fucking glorious>>44030448>Doc had become rather fixated on the armsmen he was treating, and wound up dragging the partially-disemboweled man along with us onto the lift.Armsman, if it's just one guy>>44031061Whoops, dunno how I missed that>>44031269Yeah, that was fun.>>44032044Emperor's Teeth, Frank...
Has anyone archived this yet?
>>44031129Cutter you glorious bastard!!!!!!!!!!!!!
>>44027113Based Shoggy, catching this live for the first time ever.
>>44033509>tink>twitchim trying really hard not to be a dick, but you make it difficult
you shall not die till the follow up is done
>>44032669We wound up camped in the Daemonthopic Sanctum for a few days, just keeping an eye on the thing, but it stayed put and didn't do anything warpy, even when the non-technomagical psi-suppressors were deactivated for installation. The Daemonthrope was still creepy looking mind you, with the metal-covered face, glowing eyes, and smoky wings, and all that, but it wasn't creepy FEELING anymore. When coupled with the fact that the Cogtain's crater no longer screamed at people (though it still couldn't be repaired), we took that as a clear sign that Fio's wraithbone-thingy had done the trick, and the Daemon was being held in check.After our paranoia had abated, we descended into the ship to see how bad the damage looked. The final tally was nearly a sixth of the crew dead, and half again as many wounded, which meant that the second Doc showed his face downstairs, he was hauled off to the medbay to lend a hand, and didn't reappear for several days. On the mechanical side the damage was considerably lighter: the ghost-nids hadn't bothered to vandalize anything, so it was mostly a matter of unmaintained systems having problems, and battle damage, most of which had been caused by us. 'Ol Bill was especially cross about this being the second time we'd nearly destroyed the bridge-lift's shaft, and the fact that the aft cargo-lift's platform was just GONE. Anyway, no critical systems were damaged, and our meager fuel reserves were still intact, which meant that there was no mechanical reason not to continue our trip to the Ordos Xenos research facility.
bumping cause shoggy is back baby
Thread's in autosage, newfag.
>>44030635>Engraved over the door to in the skelebro room>Don't forget your here forever.
>>44033778>no mechanical reason not to continue our trip to the Ordos Xenos research facility>no mechanical reasonBrace yourselves lads, the other other other other shoe is about to drop
Nothing can possibly go wrong from here on out. oh wait.
>>44033778It turned out there weren't any non-mechanical reasons to stop either. The Daemonthrope was secure, and now that Fio's wraithbone thingy was doing most of the work, the suppressors were running just fine. So the big bug wasn't a problem, and while there were still a few ghost-nids wandering around the tainted areas, without increasing numbers forcing them outwards, they weren't any more of an issue than anything else that haunted those decks.The Gravis situation was looking up too, much to Doc's relief. When Doc escaped from his girlfriend for a few minutes and ran to check on Gravis, he found that despite the dead Scout's harsh predictions, the bisected Space Marine doing just fine in the Daemonthrope's old stasis unit. In fact, he was doing so well now that he wasn't under constant attack by a spiteful possessed bug, that we were able to take him out of the Stasis Unit long enough for Tink and Fio to get the whole thing mobile, and moved up to the medbay.So we continued on our way, slowly meandering along what was probably most ass-backwards route ever plotted by an Imperial vessel, and things slowly returned to normal. Doc doctored and Tink tinkered, though mostly on wounded armsmen and the stealth shuttle instead of Gravis or the Sanctum. Jim, Fio, and Hannah kept busy repairing the ship and trying to figure out WHY the wraithbone device worked the way it did, and spent their free time annoying the hell out of the Navigator next-door by watching Tau vids at high volume in the Sanctum. Aimy, slightly regretfully, stepped down as de-facto commander of half the ship's armsmen, and returned to mooching around with Twitch, Nubby, and Fumbles. Through some sort of miracle all four of them kept out of trouble (at least anything serious enough to come to Sarge's attention) for the rest of the trip. Finally, Sarge was allowed a few days to plan things with the Captain, then was dragged off by the relentless Diplomacy Adept to resume his classes.
Shoggy, we're going to need another thread in order to finish this. It's the only way.
>>44033288Really?So if Oak's response to their delivery is "Good job, here's a pat on the back and a moderate reward" that'd be the GM helping the players too?
>>44034220we need no new thread, the emperor protects trooper
>>44034220Hold the fuck up, he still has about 7 other threads to burn through before this one kicks the bucket and gets archived.
>>44034200>then was dragged off by the relentless Diplomacy Adept to resume his classes.Poor Sarge.Maybe he should have thrown the fight.
>>44034200I hope "relentless diplomacy" is talent in the Dark Heresy 2 expansion
>>44028456That was exactly the screencap I was thinking of, but didn't have saved. Hella props, anon.
psst, Shoggy, it'd be cool if you could link to caps of your other campaign stories on the google doc somewhere
>>44034200>was dragged off by the relentless Diplomacy Adept to resume his classesAh, good, that means he'll learn enough NOT to kill or scream at Oak when he sees him again.Although the last time he got pissed off at Oak he ended up taking a promotion...
>>44033336In a CoC game our group killed an outer god's mortal shell by throwing hundreds of rounds of ammunition into it's flaming body. Cheese is the name of the game with a killer GM.
>>44034444As a wise man once said: if bullets can't kill it, you aren't using enough bullets.
>>44034392Which means sarge is probably going to get promoted to full inquisitor after this mess.sure he dragged a daemon possessed zoanthrope across a sector, but more importantly he SUCCESSFULLY dragged a daemon possessed zoanthrope a sector.
>>44034392> Screaming at your officer > Who is an inquisitionFirst of all. No. That's not what you do as a non-com and definitely not to the inquisition.Second of all, I feel like you're underestimating the power of a sargeants sardonic understatement while staring a hole in a point three inches to the left and a foot past your superior while earlobing him disapprovingly.
>>44034492I'd like to point out that Oak did not specify that the Zooanthrope we captured had to NOT be demon possessed, sure he never asked for it but I personally think this falls within his mission. Really, all he said was get it alive, and its definitely alive, if not a bit metallic and demon filled. We've also gone well below minimal acceptable casualties for an Inquisition mission (a whole squad of space marines, half a space station and 70% of its astropaths, as well as only 1/6th of the crew killed for once.)
>>44034482We didn't shoot it. We THREW boxes of 50 cal ammunition into it. It only worked because the thing cooked off all of the rounds near instantaneously with it's fiery torso and all. Our GM was not happy.
>>44034537And to be fair, the metallic bit is just a coating. He should be thanking them for delivering it pre-anodized.
>>44034537oak knew this would happenand make the occurance border 0.01% more safe. Maybe the box feeds off demons?
>>44034577Either I'm too tired to read coherent english, or you're too tired to write coherently. Either way one of us needs to fuck off to bed.
>>44034603probably both just got off a 13 hour shift.
bump for lifebump for glory
>>44034689i think this is the end my freind FOR GLORY
>>44034200Finally, two weeks later, we came out of the warp in a single planet system. The fuel situation was such that, even with a minimum-distance dewarp, it still took us the better part of a day to coast our way into vox range of the small station orbiting the planet. It really says something about just how low you are when you wind up using your shuttles to push the ship the few million kilometers.As we got into vox range, Sarge dressed up and transmitted his credentials and the contact information he'd been given as part of his mission briefing, and held his breath, but thankfully this time the response came immediately. The Occurrence Border was cleared to refuel at the station, though docking was out of the question given that it was smaller than our ship. Sarge was instructed not to wait for the refueling, and deliver his cargo to the research facility (which was the only thing on the desert planet) as soon as he entered shuttle range. The relief that went through EVERYONE one the ship at hearing all this was massive. Doc actually cried when he heard them confirm that they had a medical facility capable of treating tyranid bio contamination. The rest of us were more restrained, merely cheering and holding a wild party, before blearily dressing ourselves in our best uniforms and moving Gravis and the Daemonthrope into the shuttle.The loading of the Daemonthrope was uneventful, except for the harrowing trip down the the make-shift lift, which involved a lot more swinging back and forth than seemed reasonable. It was crammed into the shuttle along with the usual cluster of psi-suppressors, and a mobile version of the wraithbone-device that Fio had devised. The little Tau would not be coming down to the planet with us, this being and Inquisitorial facility that experimented on xenos and all, but he begged us to bring the wraithbone back after the Daemonthrope was delivered, which is why his device had been mounted on the grox-skull encased Spot.
>>44034537The crux of the matter is that if someone is crazy enough to order a zoanthrope from the Inquisition then there's going to be another person wanting a demon at some point. Two birds with one stone. The AGP should be rewarded, promoted, etc. for such proactive service above and beyond the call of duty to the Imperium.Unless it's a problem, in which case it's entirely Sergeant Gravis' fault for acquiring a faulty specimen and the AGP were just running delivery like they were told.
>>44034712Thank the emperor that something relatively normal finally happened.
>>44034200>there weren't any non-mechanical reasons to stop eitherOkay. I was wrong.>>44034355most of them are at the end of the archived first thread, which is easily located via 1d4chan.>>44034712Things are going too wellWhat's going to explode first?
>>44034790Still wondering if i can ever watch your game bro.
>>44034815>After seeing a squad of freaking footsloggers pull all this shit off? Damn right he's gonna explode.
>>44034712Do they just hide everything inside of grox skulls if its heretical?
it's 7 am and I need to sleep. Shoggy plz
so how do you think the researchers are going to react when they find out the bug has been possessed?
>>44034873You obviously dont, since you're here. No, you need shoggy
>>44034846Go ahead and message shadowrumble on Skype, but if I were you I'd just wait for the storytime.>>44034891Disbelief that it's even possible. Probably gibbering terror when they realize it's true.
>>44034891Joint research time with the Ordo Hereticus!
>>44034917>shadowrumbleI like to meet the gms in advance.
>>44034891>Proof that Tyranids are of Chaos and the Inquisition should totally be given even more power to stop them>Grey knights start being deployed against Tyranids>Ordos Malleus and Xenos start doing massive joint operations
>>44034895You're right of course. But the pain...
>>44034967The pain proves your devotion and worth to shoggy.
>>44034917>We swear it's true. This nid is a daemonhost.>Bullshi....OH GOD EMPEROR IT'S TRUE! WHY DIDN'T YIU SHOOT IT AND THROW IT OUT THE AIRLOCK?!>...I hate you all.
Writing the last 2ish posts now btw, if this goes red I'll just start a new thread for the last ones.
>>44034934I decided spending more than five minutes trying to come up with a less shit ID was a waste of time.>>44034967Prayer may cleanse the soul, but pain cleanses the body. Both are necessary for the survival of humanity.
>>44035004Come on mate. There's a rule against posting those outside of our home. Or /trash/.No matter how cute they are.>>44035018Thanks boss
We won't let you down
>>44034967Remember, "Pain is weakness leaving the body".And that's why they're called a zoo!Except when they're a farm!
>>44035004And you could have at least posted a better resolution version. Hell, two minutes on a booru is all it takes.>>44035059??
Oh boy, first time I catch one of these...And yet so late.
>>44035073>Incoherent warp screams
>Page elevenI forgot /tg/ had this. We might make it after all.
>>44030438But bees are NICE.
>>44035157wasp on the other hand are dicks
>>44030438You, sir, are a swine and not my nigga. Bees make honey and doesn't afraid of anything.
>>44035121>page 11What kind of dark magic is this?Also sup/tg/
>>44035207Absolutely last thread on the board.
A live AGP thread? Damn. Also, fuck, the Tyranid Delivery finally went down. Bet that's a relief; life on the Occurence Border is massively shitty even without psychic bugs.
>>44035258>livebarelywe are the last fucking thread on the board, but THE EMPEROR PROTECTSalso detpacks. and booze.
i'd enjoy a sigh of relief that the AGP is FINALLY done with the Zoanthrope and can sit back for some decent R&R but i'm pretty sure I'd choke on it.
this waiting is killing me
The waiting has killed me. I am merely a corpse, enslaved to the Shoggyhype. It is good. I am pleased to serve my new master.
>>44035415Go play poker then.
>>44035415It wouldn't be so bad if not for the threat of the thread dying at any second.
9 posts left until we hit 500.
>>44035437Not anymore.So which happens first? We hit 500, the thread locks, or the story continues?
I just wanted to post something.495 is a good number.
I'M SORRY TO EVERYONE ON SUPTG FOR THE CRAPPY DESCRIPTION, IT WAS ON PAGE 10.
>>44035434Hold the line anon. Not one step back!
>>44035493Threads dont just disappear nowadays from Page 10, you cook.Threads are archived on 4chan for a week or two. Theres no rush for archiving on suptg.
>>44035521The highest I've seen is 800 posts
I long for the sweet embrace of sleep. But not as much as I need to know what happens next.Midnight cooking time.
>>440355571000+ for me.
>>44034712The shuttle we took down was NOT the stealth shuttle. Tink claimed he'd gotten it to the point where it would fly and hold air, even if most of the stealth bits were completely non-functional, but none of us had liked the way he kept using words like "should" and "probably". Jim flew us down in a standard shuttle with a whole lot of patched bright-lance holes in it, which failed to explode or do anything else interesting on its way from the still-braking Occurrence Border to the Research Facility. As we made our final approach we transmitted our contact codes again, and were instructed to a lone landing pad which jutted out of a completely barren mountainside and bristled with anti-air turrets. Jim put the shuttle down precisely in the middle of all the turrets, and our entire party (Adepts included, as this was an official event) filed out of the shuttle. We were greeted by party of five men. The man in the middle was tall, tanned, wore a long coat that looked amazingly uncomfortable in the blistering heat of the landing pad, and had an Ordos Xenos rosette hanging from his neck, so we pegged him as Inquisitor Sciscitat. He was flanked by a cogboy, a scribe who looked like he was dying of heat exhaustion, and what even we immediately recognized as a pair of Deathwatch Space Marines. Sarge snapped off a parade-ground salute, which earned him a kick in the shin from the Diplomacy Adept, and formally introduced himself as Interrogator Greg Sargent, delivering one live Zoanthrope on behalf of Inquisitor Oak, as requested. He made no mention of the Zoanthrope's little problem, figuring that was a discussion best had when there were no armed Space Marines present.
>>44035557Was that on /tg/? Because I've seen stuff on other boards that gets up into the multithousands
So long as no one makes a new thread, we'll be fineMay the Emperor himself bless Shoggy's typing fingers, and the Omnissiah thrice consecrate his keyboard
>>44035521Really? Well, festering ball sacks. I could have fit at least one poorly thought out pun into it then.Cheers.(also absolutely loving this Shoggy, only complaint was that Twitch's first prediction didn't have any legit red herrings surrounding it.)
Are the Pulse rifles actually that good compared to Hellguns?
>>44035570I'm willing to go the distance for AGP.I mean, the 800 was . . HQR I think? When everyone voted to cut scene killing all the waifus. Best ending to a quest since Zeonquest when Rolf died.Also I came to hate everyone who participated for being whiny selfish bitches.
>>44035618They're one of the best infantry weapons in the system. They're a general-use thing, not specialized for any particular task, but they pack a wallop.>>44035574YYEESSS>Inquisitor SciscitatHm. Any linguists wanna puzzle out the hidden joke?
>>44035574>He made no mention of the Zoanthrope's little problem, figuring that was a discussion best had when there were no armed Space Marines present.uncivilised snigger/snort
Oh shit, I just catch the tail end of this. As always: you're awesome, Shoggy!
>>44035574>He made no mention of the Zoanthrope's little problem, figuring that was a discussion best had when there were no armed Space Marines present.There is no way this can backfire whatsoever.
>>44035643It literally means Inquisitor Inquisitor.
>>44035643Makes me think of pokemon.Like, Rattatat.
>>44035643Yeah, but Hellguns are as good as Bolters.
>>44035696Are we talking fluff or crunch?
>>44035664Because it just leads to a full explanation on gravis' situation and the state of his sacred war gear.
>>44035696Space marine bolters or mortal bolters?
>>44035664oh they'll mention it... in the official report when they are really really far away and had about a week of sleep and twitch manages to restock all of his boom sticks he had to waste.
>>44035696A Bolter has Tearing. A pulse gun has good RoF, multidie damage, and Gyro-Stabilized on top of as-good-as-a-boltgun penetration, and ammo is much cheaper despite being heretical.The primary downside to pulse weaponry is that you can't use variant ammunition.
>>44035643>SciscitatIt's latin for "to know", so he's basically Inquisitor Curious.
>>44035664You know, if I was ever asked to retell whole Zoanthrope delivery thing(or any other AGP story) in two sentences I would probably go with "With their unique problem-solving approach the party faces the unfaceable" and "There is no way this can backfire whatsoever."
>>44035753Or Inquisitor Inquisitive, depending on your translation.In either case, the pun is redundancy.
>>44035706Both>>44035715Dunno.They can penetrate SM Armor pretty easily.
>>44035753Or inquisitor inquisitive
>>44035706Also, wargame crunch is different from RPG crunch
>>44035574The Inquisitor accepted Sarge's introduction with a nod, and took a long look at the Daemonthrope's pallet. The web of cables hooked up to the wraithbone device obscured the wings from a cursory examination, but the man's eyes obviously lingered on the half-melted metal, and the general tau-ishness of pretty much every piece of tech on the pallet. Thankfully he didn't start jumping up and down screaming about heretical xenotech, and we all let out a breath of a relief as he turned away from the Pallet to face his two non-superhuman flunkies. That relief abruptly evaporated as he ordered them to take the Zoanthrope, and "store it in the live-sample holding cells with the rest of the evidence."Before any of us had managed to absorb the implications of that last word, the Inquisitor turned back to Sarge, and announced that he, his men, and his ship, were all under arrest by the joint orders of the Ordos Hereticus and Ordos Xenos. Fumbles and Jim both let out little whimpers, and Twitch and Nubby both immediately started to go for their sidearms, but paused as the Space Marines instantly raised their bolters. The rest of us stood there, slack-jawed, until Sarge managed to ask just what in the Emperor's name we were under arrest FOR.The Inquisitor's face went absolutely blank, and in a voice that seemed almost mechanical, but made Fumbles shake like a leaf, he replied:>What for? Well most recently, disregarding an order to cease all operations and return to headquarters, the murder of two squads of Space Marines, the attack of an Imperial Space Station, and the transport of a live xenos psyker for purposes of heretical experimentation. But the charge at the top of the list will almost certainly be aiding and abetting the Rogue Inquisitor colloquially known as "Oak".Well… Shit.
>>44035862Did I do it?Did I finish in time?Cmonnnnnnn, this would so blow to put in another thread.
>>44035862Good lord. Well goodnight Shoggy, and thanks.
>>44035862fucker called it>>44035862>disregarding an order to cease all operations and return to headquarters, the murder of two squads of Space MarinesI don't remember these to though>>44035874You have done well my friend
>>44035874You did it, Shoggy. You made it.
>>44035874It is good, Shoggy. It is well.
>>44035862But.. wasn't one of the space marine squads still alive!?Also fuck, was Oak rogue this whole time or did we just fuck him over? Or... FUCK OUR BADGE WAS ACTUALLY INVALID!
>>44035874You did it!
Well...shit sums that up very nicely
>>44035885*these two. Fuck me.G'night everyone.
>>44035862Activate suicide belts in 3..2..
I thought it couldnt get worse.Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck
>>44035862That's the Inquisition alright.
>>44035862BUT WHO WAS OAK!?! Is Oak really Oak or is Oak Oak a false Oak?!
>>44035874>Cmonnnnnnn, this would so blow to put in another thread.you did it shoggy...YOU LEFT US IN A WHOLE CLIFFHANGER!...awsome work,
Shit son, how rogue do you have to be to be considered a rogue inquisitor?
>>44035862WHAT AM I READING?