FIRST POST

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You remember something about her - she showed up a day or two ago, at most, right after the Battle. In all the commotion and aftermath...

“Whatever.” You return to trying to sheath your weapon and manage on the fifth try, the blade whispering quietly as it slides into the steel-lined sheath. Not good for regular use, that, but fine for this thing.

Sendai surveys the scene slowly. “Two at once?”

“Yeah.” Your leg isn't hurting much - between the painkillers you knock down every morning for your thigh and the booze, you're pretty well medicated.

Sendai takes in a deep breath, her dark eyes sparking even in the dim security lamp glow. As sirens begin to wail in the distance, she begins to bounce on her heels ever so slightly. She takes a slow, deep breath and meets your gaze steadily.

She nods once, slowly and solemnly.

“Allow me to bandage your wound, then.”

She's halfway through wrapping your leg tightly in a long length of cotton she was carrying for some reason when the MPs show up, piling out of their humvee with enough guns to shoot Boondock Saints IV.

“The fuck you think you're pointing that!?” you snap, popping off the tree you were leaning against. Sendai scuddles after you carrying the trailing bit of bandage like a bridal veil as you advance on the MPs. “Did you forget what an Admiral looks like, asshole?”

“FREEZE!” one of them shouts, sighting down his M9. “HANDS BEHIND YOUR HEAD!”

>>43265535
Wow that's fast Navyfag

FIRST>>43265535

WHAT THE FUCK

>>43265535
>Navyfag got first post
Sasuga /tg/

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“WHEN HELL STARTS SELLING TIME-SHARES, FUCKWIT!” you roar, your voice rebounding from the darkened buildings and rolling down the landscaped lane. “I WAS ON NATIONAL TV AND YOU'RE TELLING ME TO ASSUME THE MOTHERFUCKING POSITION!?”

The MP visibly pales for a moment. “G-get down on your knee-”

“DO I LOOK LIKE A MARINE? DO I LOOK LIKE A GLASSBLOWIN MOTHERFUCKER TO YOU!?”

Both MPs blink at that.

“ANSWER ME, ANSWER ME OR SO HELP ME GOD I'LL GET YOU SENT TO AN ISLAND SO FUCKING TINY IT DIDN'T EXIST LAST YEAR!”

“...Admiral Settle?”

“NO!” you scream. “I'M THE KING OF COLON KINGDOM. COME OVER HERE SO I CAN KNIGHT YOU!” you snarl, raising your cane. They slowly lower their guns - and raise them again when they see the two bodies in the road. One of them grabs his shoulder mike and starts calling for backup.

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You're fully bandaged and leaning on your cane with both hands, giving the first two a nice long hatefuck glare when the rest of the circus arrives. Things become one long string of questions after that, four of which you actually answer, and each of those exactly once. Phones start ringing and people start waking up.

Half an hour later, you're in the base hospital again, a doctor stitching up your leg as you watch with moderate interest. He hasn't made eye contact with you since he suggested a Breathalyzer and you suggested he stuff it up his ass.

“Well is it bad?” you ask. The needle pricks slightly, the thin medical thread itchy and slightly raspy as he pulls the wound together.

“Not even that deep, nothing vital, no muscle damage to speak of,” he says nervously. “You got lucky.”

You grump.

>>43265563
Not fooling me, asshole.

>>43265555
>>43265587
This can only go well...

I can imagine the headlines.

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The opposite door slams open before a tidal wave of wrath, Goto stomping in after it. His weary, drawn face is lit with the hard, edged energy of a man running on sheer willpower.

“I killed two Yakuza.”

Goto's eyes widen and he barely wrenches his lips away from a grimace. “What *happened?*”

“Two. Men. Attacked. Me. And. I. Killed. Them,” you say, hammering your fist into the crinkly paper on the hospital examination bed for punctuation. “Is this so fucking hard? Were the MPs unable to fucking enunciate this for you?”

He narrows his eyes. “You're drunk.”

“No SHIT, Sherlock,” you snap.

The door bangs loudly again, making the doctor jump enough to prick your leg. Hate is standing by the bedside before the door's managed to hiss shut again. He sucks in a deep lungful of air, seeming to puff up like those spiny fish the locals eat... and pauses, his mouth adding to the likeness by opening and closing silently.

“YOU-” he manages. “FuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuckinggodamnshitkickingcherrypickingdipfuckdumbasscockslutfudgepackingweevilbrainedtripleyankeedicksuckcolonvaccumingshitbaggrannygrapinassbanditocockjugglingthunderthighsFLESHY!” the knifehand is up now, and rising - “HEADED! MUTANT! MOTHER. FUCKERDON'TYOUHAVEAPHONEIVESEENYOURFUCKINGPHONEPLAYINGFUCKINGNETHACKONYOURFUCKINGPHONELIKETHEFUCKINGANNAPOLISNERDFUCKYOUAREBUTYOUCAN'TCALLFORAFUCKINGRIDEEVENWITHAMOTHERFUCKINGBULLSEYEPAINTEDONYOURWHITEFLESHYFUCKINGDINGLEBERRYERRYONEABOARDASSHOLEBECUASEYOU'REACOCKBLOCKING-” He gathers up the last of his air and flings it at you in one tight, dense ball as hard as he can - “OFFICER!”

Then he turns and kind of glides out in a bubble of wrath.

The doctor and Goto look at each other.

“He mad,” you comment seriously.

>>43265555
"SON TWO MOTHERFUCKERS JUST TRIED TO VENTILATE ME AND YOUR ARRESTING ME!"

>>43265626
American Admiral Abandoned By Japanese and Forced to Kill 2 Yakuza with his sword cane?

>>43265636
>He mad
I can't
I just can't
Pffffhahgashahaha

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The next person through the door is Arizona. Catching sight of you stops her like hitting a brick wall; her expression blanks, eyes widening as she takes in your injury and the stitches marching down it. You watch her sway slightly, tears growing at the corners of her eyes...

... and then she crosses the room in long, sure strides, heading right for you, her eyes blazing and hot. The doctor has just tied the knot in the stitches and snipped off the excess when she shoves Goto aside as easily as a shower curtain -

- and fetches you an open-handed blow across the chops hard enough to whip your head around. The sound of impact is still ringing in your ears, Arizona's labored breathing underlying it.

>Express thine general sentiment!

[ ] I'm not a goddamned child.
[ ] You're not my goddamned mother.
[ ] You are out of goddamned line.

>>43265666

Don't fucking start satan.

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>>43265555
AM I BEING DETAINED?

I KNOW MY RIGHTS

>>43265636
If base security was actually doing their job, and Force Protection actually took the job seriously, maybe this could have been prevented.

>>43265675
>[X] You are out of goddamned line.

>>43265675
>[ ] I'm not a goddamned child.

NOBODY EXPECTED YAKS OUT OF NOWHERE, WE HANDLED IT WELL

>>43265675
>[X] You are out of goddamned line.

>>43265675
>[ ] You're not my goddamned mother.
You're not my real mom!

>>43265675
>[x]I'm not a goddamned child.

>>43265675
>[ ] You are out of goddamned line.

>>43265675
>[ ] You are out of goddamned line.
Still a military.

>>43265675

>[X] I'm not a goddamned child.

>>43265675
>[x] You are out of goddamned line.

She is a soldier and she stepped out of line.

So far no Shoukaku though, maybe that bit of Zuikaku not being able to find her in that one torpedogirl bit might be more worrying than I thought.

>>43265675
>[ ] I'm not a goddamned child.

>>43265675
>[ ] I'm not a goddamned child.

>>43265675
>[ ] I'm not a goddamned child.

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Perfect, was just waiting for the next thread. Here's some Willie!

>>43265675
>[ ] I'm not a goddamned child.

>>43265675
>[x]I did a dumb

>>43265675
>>[X] You are out of goddamned line.

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>>43265675
>[x] I fucked up, sorry.

Now is not the time to piss off the angry battleship.

>>43265535
Well done!
>>43265675
>[ ] I'm not a goddamned child.
Settle's mom is still alive and you are not her Arizona.

>>43265675
>[ ] I'm not a goddamned child.

RESPHEKT MI ATHORITI

>>43265675
>[ ] I'm not a goddamned child.

>>43265675
>[x] "She also mad".

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>>43265675
>[ ] I'm not a goddamned child.
Look, kid, I understand your sentiment, but... things happened. We couldn't have possibly foreseen it, yaknow?
Also, what if they came for you first?

>>43265679
How's that going for you, blue falcon-san?

>>43265675
>[X] I'm not a goddamned child.

>>43265675
>>43265745
>>43265749
these

seriously, this is what we keep her around to prevent.

>>43265675
[x] I'm not a goddamned child.

>>[x] I'm not a goddamned child.
Seems to be the most conciliatory.

>>43265740
Pixelfag you are awesome!

>>43265675
>[ ] I'm not a goddamned child.

>>43265675
>[x] I'm too goddamned drunk for this

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>>43265740

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>>43265749

>>43265675
>[X] I'm not a goddamned child.

>>43265675
>[X] You're not my goddamned mother.

Whining that we aren't a child is pretty hilarious given how much we've been trying to treat her and other botes like children.

>>43265666

Yes. Settle is not only drunk, but now he's drunk and riding more painkillers and an adrenaline crash.

>>43265675
>[ ] You are out of goddamned line.

>>43265659
I was imagining more:
"EVIL GAIGIN ATTACKS DEFENCELESS SOLDIERS. GETS A MEDAL FROM FILTHY GAIGIN COMMANDERS!"
>>43265740
epic work

>>43265773

we are drunk and waifu wars will get us killed at this rate.

>>43265675
>[ ] You're not my goddamned mother.

Is Settle technically a child by comparison to Arizona's age?

>>43265675
>[X] I'm not a goddamned child.

>>43265675
>[ ] I'm not a goddamned child.

AYYYZEEEE plz girl, plz. Settle a fucking fencer, and he handled YAKUZA AMBUSH with style.

Just fucking grease his shoes or something.

>>43265675
[X]I did something wrong and I'm sorry
[X]Don't tell anyone I said that

>>43265636
>“YOU-” he manages. “FuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuckinggodamnshitkickingcherrypickingdipfuckdumbasscockslutfudgepackingweevilbrainedtripleyankeedicksuckcolonvaccumingshitbaggrannygrapinassbanditocockjugglingthunderthighsFLESHY!” the knifehand is up now, and rising - “HEADED! MUTANT! MOTHER. FUCKERDON'TYOUHAVEAPHONEIVESEENYOURFUCKINGPHONEPLAYINGFUCKINGNETHACKONYOURFUCKINGPHONELIKETHEFUCKINGANNAPOLISNERDFUCKYOUAREBUTYOUCAN'TCALLFORAFUCKINGRIDEEVENWITHAMOTHERFUCKINGBULLSEYEPAINTEDONYOURWHITEFLESHYFUCKINGDINGLEBERRYERRYONEABOARDASSHOLEBECUASEYOU'REACOCKBLOCKING-” He gathers up the last of his air and flings it at you in one tight, dense ball as hard as he can - “OFFICER!”

Aw, how sweet! He really does care!

>>43265636
That was...

Congrats, Planefag. You're the only person I've ever known actually make me feel like I'm being screamed at by a marine, purely through type.

Now can I get a translation of that legendary spew of volcanic bile and vitriol?

>>43265675
>[x]...I deserved that
But
>[x] I am not a goddamned child

>>43265675
>[ ] I'm not a goddamned child.
>[ ] You're not my goddamned mother.

>>43265740
Once more Pixelfag descended unto us from the heavens and delivered.

And it was good.

>>43265626
And for the clickbait sites:

5 Encounters that Show Crime Never Pays: You Won't Believe Number 2!

>>43265675
>[ ] I'm not a goddamned child.

>[ ] You are out of goddamned line.

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>>43265740
Magnificent.

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>>43265740

>>43265769
>Also, what if they came for you first?

SHE HAS AN ARMOR BELT YOU FUCKING DINGUS.

>>43265675
>[ ] I'm not a goddamned child.

>[X] I'm not a goddamned child

>>43265675
>[ ] You are out of goddamned line.

>>43265740
Based pixel

>>43265675

>[ ] I'm not a goddamned child.
>I'm just stupid sometimes

>>43265675
>They started it

>>43265740
YESSS.

>I'm not a goddamned child
But we seem to be acting like one, what with not keeping a bodyguard close or phoning for an escort when we learned that Abyssals have started land operations.

>You're not my goddamned mother
No, but someone needs to do the job, especially a bodyguard and whoever is handling Settle's personal security.

>You are out of goddamned line
Eh, Settle kind of needs it. Technically striking an officer, but since the hulls don't seem to actually have a rank, and are more like vehicles in terms of military law, it'd be hard to prosecute a vehicle for running over an officer.

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>>43265675
>[x] You're not my goddamned mother.

>>43265835
How in the fuck was he supposed to expect two armed Yaks to attack him in the middle of a fucking Naval base.

This is base securities fault, not his.

>>43265824
Add a space wherever you think fits.

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Dramatic recreation of the last two hours.

>>43265818
Yaoi.

>>43265764

This

>>43265769
Man what, Arizona could literally waste those two guys by just breathing too hard in their direction.

>>43265675
[X] I'm not a goddamned child.
I'm surprised that Sendai was first on scene.

>waiting for Shoukaku

>>43265675
>[ ] I'm not a goddamned child.

>>43265740
Willie is bestest, toughest duaghteru.

>>43265555
>inb4 Sendai now has a crush on Settle

>>43265675
>say nothing
>give the glare of a man whose rage has long since burnt over into numbness, so great the human mind can no longer even comprehend its existence, yet alone express it.

>>43265740
You're too good for this place

>>43265860
You're fucking stupid.

>>43265769
Yes a baton and a knife will do SO MUCH AGAINST BB ARMOR DID YOU KNOW THAT JAPS STRAPPED BATONS AND KNIVES TO THEIR BOMBS TO MAKE THEM PENETRATE DEEPER?

>>43265675
[x] Other: Yeah, I kind of deserved that. It was stupid, right now with Abyssals around.

>>43265675
>[ ] You are out of goddamned line.

>>43265868
YES

>>43265675
[x]I am so high right now

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>>43265835
BUT NOT AN ARMOR HEART

>>43265878
>>43265835
Guys, come on, I was just thinking about those yaks being actually COMPETENT.

Worst-case scenario bullshit, yaknow?

>>43265555
>As sirens begin to wail in the distance, she begins to bounce on her heels ever so slightly
Did Sendai's heart just go doki-doki?

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>>43265795

>>43265675
>[ ] I'm not a goddamned child.

My personal opinion is that we kind of totally deserve that, but given the options presented are all varying flavors of "fuck you I did nothing wrong", I'm guessing we're still in a petulant pissy kind of mood, so it seems appropriate that our response is a flimsy denial of our actual state of mind.

>>43265675
>[ ] You are out of goddamned line.

>>43265824
>Now can I get a translation of that legendary spew of volcanic bile and vitriol?

But then it wouldn't sound like an actual marine!

>>43265871
Goddamn it KTKM. Go back to playing with your Vita already.

>>43265901
This

>>43265675
I'm going to go with "I'm sorry Ari, there wasn't time to do anything but try to survive. Which I did. Them, not so much". Hopefully the nickname will throw her off long enough for her to realize this time we really didn't do anything wrong.

>[X] I'm not a goddamned child.

[x] I'm not a goddamned child.

>>43265675
Yes Slap the drunk who was on his way to get you.

>>43265675
>[ ] How the fuck was I suppose to know I was going to be jumped!?

>>43265895
Technically, no-one knows what the shipgirls are vulnerable to, while not wearing their rigs. They're still fleshy up until they go 'battle mode' and their squishy bits turn into person-looking steel and iron.

So in theory, if they're caught by surprise, they could be killed as easily as any other girl.

>>43265675
>[X] You're not my goddamned mother.

>>43265912
The base wakes up to the sound of her guns?

>>43265933
No, it would sound like an Officer instead!

>>43265675
Hey look it's planefag artificially limiting our options of what to say so he can stir up shit. I wonder where I've seen THIS happen before?

>>43265521
Whoa, so he killed one Yakuza with the hilt of his sword or something?

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>>43265535
Anschluss when?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uwaSLYIO7f8

>>43265914
SENDAI ROUTE UNLOCKED.

>>43265749
>>43265745
I understand you wanna be sensible, but Settle's not sensible right now.

>>43265740
YES

Also, do recent events mean that is open season on yaks?

>>43265675

[ ] OK, I deserved that. Do it again and you're beached, though.

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>>43265969
Settle gives no fucks

>>43265740
Cute!

>>43265912

Shipgirl > human

It wouldn't have even been a contest. Remember that safety video we watched awhile back during the Corgi fiascor.

>>43265914
>>43265975
do you two know fishman, by any chance?

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>>43265969

A full range of options almost always results in Anon licking the feet of whoever they want to bone, without fail. Sometimes, you have to be saved from yourselves.

>>43265969
Write-in is always an option.
Admittedly, an option that anons very rarely take because they like railroads but don't want to admit it.

Of course, in this specific case, a reasonable and rational response may not even be possible with all of the alcohol and pain medication in Settle's bloodstream.

>>43265984
A simple "THEY STARTED IT" would suffice greatly here.

>>43265997
>>43265964
Precisely what I feared...
Better to go Zatoichi than go BOOM BOOM BOULEVARD

>>43265993
Willie's always cute not matter what.

>>43266004
Who?

>>43265675
>[ ] I'm not a goddamned child.

>>43265675
>[x] You are out of goddamned line.

>>43265675
>[ ] You are out of goddamned line.
But honestly, we probably should apologize

>>43266009
I fully agree. In this case, be it Arizona, Shoukaku, Higgins or Iowa, being anything less than rebellious, angry and utterly without fucks to give would be out of character.

>>43265824
>Now can I get a translation of that legendary spew of volcanic bile and vitriol?
"You asshole, why didn't you call me, I was so worried about you but I can't just say that because I'm an angry tough manly Marine."

>>43265675
>[X] You are out of goddamned line.
>Not that you're wrong.

>>43266009
I can stop Waifuing any time I want to. And shall if Keine-Clone enters the pictue.

VOTES PRETTY OVERWHELMINGLY CALLED

>>43266009
True dat.

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>>43265969
I already posted the planefag list. You'll have to settle for smug anime girls.

>>43265997
Shock and awe gets through to sailors and marines far better than the unvarnished truth. It IS possible to bone a shipgirl without worrying about getting your dick caught in her turbines, but it's a hell of a lot easier to avoid the resultant mess by telling the grunts that their man-tackle is in peril.

>>43266009
I still think, "I deserved that, but I am not a goddamn child!" is the best approach... I mean, I DID vote for it and even medicated, Settle should know he dun goof'd

>>43266022

They don't even need to do that. Said video included kongo folding a flag pole in half to get to Goto. Imagine what she can do to a human being.

No need for guns.

>[ ] You are out of goddamned line.

As much as we like Arizona, there is still a line and she crossed it. It works out with Settle going all angry admiral because of the MPs as well

>>43265740
Thank you based Pixelfag.

Needs more "USE ALL OF THE OXYGEN IN YOUR MUSCLES" though.

>>43266048
Yaoi.

>>43266057
that looks more like Stoned Anime Girl tbh

>>43265835
I looked at Scribbler's art again.
So is Hate a butterbar still?

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>>43266052
>VOTES PRETTY OVERWHELMINGLY CALLED
YAK HUNTING WHEN

>>43266048
Is this yaoi?

>>43266088
Take off your Yaoi Goggles, KTKM.

>>43265636
>BECUASEYOU'REACOCKBLOCKING
Hm

>>43266050
>I can stop Waifuing any time I want

That's what they all say. Then BAM! Surprise intervention.

>>43266102
Yes.

>>43265675
>[ ] I'm not a goddamned child.
She's out of line, but it's also understandable why she's mad. But she can't treat you like a child, or that she holds you as subordinate, you outrank her.

>>43265970
A good hit to the bridge of the nose can do that.

>>43266098
As soon as Harder and Sammie hear about the incident

>>43266109
Settle has gone FULL UKE...

Never go full uke...

>>43266098
As soon as we can devote some paperwork to it.

Which will be easy, since unlike assigning people to a Ship Girl Base, sending Military Intelligence against the Yakuza should be much easier.

>>43266088
Indeed.

>>43266118
SHUT UP YOU TORPEDO-SLUT.

>>43266116
Did someone say intervention?
>www.youtube.com/watch?v=XnlicRdvxTA

>>43266118
what is not Yaoi?

>>43266009
As much as I'd like to say you're wrong, some people will turn anything into a waifuing opportunity.

>>43266146
Did somebody call for Iku-nyan!

>>43266098
>Abyssal Season!
>Yak Season!
>Abyssal Season!
>Yak Season!
>Abyssal Season!
>Abyssal Season!
>YAK SEASON! FIRE!

>>43266088
>>43266102
In the States, we prefer to call it "bromance".

>>43266152
/m/ pls

>>43266171
Iku came!

>>43266187
It's Guy Love. There's nothing gay about it.

>>43266187
It's called Boy Love here.

>>43265675
>[ ] You are out of goddamned line.

Can we show Kitakami Top Gun?

Or would that melt her.

>>43266158
Whatever the torpedosluts do in bed.

>>43266126

Oh god, Sammy's reaction...

>GODDAMMIT I TOLD HIM THESE FUCKING ZIPPERHEADS WERE UP TO NO GOOD WHERE THE FUCK ARE THEY KEEPING HIM WONDER IF THEIR EYES'LL OPEN UP WHEN I'M PULLING THEIR BALLS OUT THEIR NOSTRILS AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-

>>43266187

It ain't gay if it's underway~

It's only queer if it's on the pier~

>>43266205
Your sister would be a lot hotter if she wasn't so gay, KTKM. Just saiyan.

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>>43266009
WHELP

>[] I think I deserved that

But

>[ ] I'm not a goddamned child.

Well, hopefully the slap did help sober Settle up.

>>43266187
In the South we call it illegal.

>>43266122
Pretty painful way to day.

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>>43266178
>Abyssal Season!
no bully pls

>>43266235
If it goes straight into the brain you pretty much just die.

>>43266209
KTKM cannot be phased

>>43266227
Not anymore

>>43266202
On the floor! And the table... and the bed... and the toilet... and the stairs... and the sidewalk... and... look, just send all your HAZMAT decontamination crews down here, all right? We're looking at a Super Mario Sunshine situation here.

>>43266235
It's pretty much instant. Break the nose and shove it up into the brainy-meat.

[Brain washing attempt commence]
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ai-9cfwWhSE

>>43266171
NO! GOD NO

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>>43266088
>>43266102
>>43266187
>>43266212
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_vFXCDDEYMU

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>>43266202
Pic Related

>>43266158
>what is not Yaoi?
Yuri

>>43266009
No, sometimes we spaghetti so hard that we turn into a pasta singularity and spontaneously summon Italians

>>43266122
Yep
Turns out there's apparently a nasty little chunk of bone there that a nose hit can break off into your brain at the right angles
Boom, you go from active man to brain damage in the frontal lobe

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>>43266088
Yayoi?

>>43266270
... Hum. What is this supposed to be?

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>>43266270
Begone foul beast, in the name of the Fatherland!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pH-wFGFI0m8

>>43266211
>Harder and Sammy Vanish from the base
>Everyone's panicking
>Sudden spike in cars transporting drugs exploding
>Someone keeps raising the American flag over random buildings
>Faeries doing commando raids on Yak safe houses
>Naka gets drunktexts from harder ranting about the nips being no good dirty backstabbers attacking people they just awarded friendship medals to

>>43266256

Those masks for faces they have on are the real terror.

>>43266171

Which one are you?

>>43266259
She's weak to kaitens.

>>43266302
The music being played at your mother's funeral

>>43266269

The reason a strike to the nose kills people (forcing the crista galli into the brain) should be pretty hard to do from the angle Settle hit that Yak

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>>43266171

>>43266270
Why must the Abyssal Admiral get all the best girls?

>>43266323
The Blue Haired Uber-Lewd one with the tits.

>>43266209
Try Brokeback Mountain. Either she goes full fujo and begins to attract the entire fly population of Japan or she cries then Ooi gives you a free trip to Valhalla.

>>43266270
We'll get you a sword cane later.

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>>43266328

>>43266323
The lewdest one. Think super-soaker. That should remind you.

>>43266269
Does that work on asians? they don't have a whole lot of nose to them?

>>43266302
Light Cruiser Oni's Cyber Sander Sider?
Cider?
Am I even reading that right?

>>43266336
[Subject found...continuing]
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=epWABkgM1_I

>>43266355
... I'll be honest, I don't follow.

>>43266310
Or litterally going full broforce on the Yazuka?

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>>43266362
Ah.
It's Cyber Thunder Cider, a vocaloid song.

>>43266363
Question, Mr Johnson. If I defect, will I get a Re-Class or Wo-class Waifu?

>>43266373
Kamikaze torpedo. KTKM is a CLT that could fire upwards of 40 torps. Put it them together and that's a hell of a body count.

>>43266375
>Broforce
I'm surprised Sammy and Harder haven't played co-op of this yet.

>>43266373
Kaitens are manned suicide torpedoes.

>>43266211
THEY GONNA LEARN!

>>43266373
Suicide torpedo. KTKM was fitted to carry them before the end of the war.

>>43266363
ANOTHER!!

>>43266394
I assume they are aiming for a Genestealer type of conversion.

The one where you end up devoured by the Hive Fleet anyway.

>>43266363

This was more amusing than it should be.

>>43266310
>>43266211
So what's Hornet doing during all of this?

>>43266395
Ah. I thought it was one of those kamikaze midget submarines, wasn't really sure what connection she would've had with those.

>>43266421
she never /actually/ carried them though.

>>43266310
HAH! Okay, that's fucking awesome. I'll support anything that involves fairies and ESPECIALLY Yakuza getting BTFO by the above.

>>43266400
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uk-87jzhVhs

Oh man that's put a smile on my fa-

>>43266355
F-fuck you, /k/ripple...

>>43266444
writing porn

>>43266373
That's Kitakami contemplating a Kaiten suicide torpedo. She was converted into a delivery platform for Kaiten late in the war, before being sunk.

>>43266394
You start with a Wo.

>>43266363
Hoppou loves hats.
Hoppou is wonderful.

>>43266441
But will I get to fuck Wo or Re first?

>>43266444
Seeing if semen can taste like coffee.

>>43266357

oh.

Aw hell.

>>43266363
I will not fall for your Hoppou-filled lies, Abyssal.

>>43266444
Exchanging towing lines with Hamp in bed.

>>43266373
Near the end of the war, the japanese devised those suicide torpedos in similar fashion to the famous kamikaze planes.
Kitakami was slated to use them.
In the game, she mentions them. "Please don't make me use THAT" or such, so she gets fanart about it.

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>>43266457
Love you too, britbro.

>>43266461
She survived the war and was scraped

>>43266471
Most likely neither. You will merely become a meat puppet for the Hive Mind.

Arizona route confirmed destroyed

Okay, so, how are we going to separate the legitimate and illegitimate businesses of the Yakuza? Or actually, how to go after the legitimate parts of the Yakuza operations?
We really do need to get the Public Security Intelligence Agency to cooperate.

>>43266498
Ah. I'd assumed she met the same fate as most of the rest of the IJN - thanks for the correction.

>>43266511
Hahaha as if, this is a flag if anything.

>>43266511
Yandere Arizona route confirmed

>>43266495
GOD DAMN SABER CLONES!
TAKEUCHI GETS HIS WAY EVERYWHERE

>>43266457
Anything that ruins KTKM's day is a good thing.
I wonder if Crab could make a decent looking recreation of a Kaiten?

>>43266522
Kill em all. No mercy.

>>43266522
Do it like how they took down Al Capone.
Then again, they might actually be paying taxes...

Also
>PSIA
>competent

>>43266522

We don't.

We get Yamato to go on national nip TV to condemn the Yaks and to demand that they commit sudoku for their shamefur display.

>>43266444

Hornet's part of the "Settlebox" alongside Arizona and Hate. They stay in a triangle formation around us, no less than a metre away from us at any time.

Northampton acts as the cowcatcher, knocking away any obvious threats ahead of us, while Willie D follows behind us and scrubs any evidence of our existence away through her aura of fuckup/destruction.

>>43266511
You underestimate /tg/'s ability to waifu young padowan.

Captcha: select the donuts.

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>>43266539
You mean Yandarizona

>>43266543
Why would you want to do that? The Kaiten were abominations of engineering.

Thank you, waifufags, I love you for the salt you generate so effortlessly.

>>43266543
Are you asking for Ooi to murder you?

>>43266522
It's pretty much impossible to destroy the Yakuza at this point, they are so deeply entrenched in Japanese business and culture.
We can probably make them have second thoughts about interfering in our business though.

>>43266557
>BREAKING NEWS, GAIJIN CIA CAPTURE GRORIOUS BATTRESHIP YAMATO AND BRAINWASH HER AGAINST JAPANESE PRIDE

>>43266543
Jesus dude do you make fun of the people that annoy you by bringing their taxidermed grandma to use as a hand puppet?

>>43266561
DID SOMEONE SAY DONUTS DESS!?!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ERy1C-mFL7Q

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>>43266188
Shipgirls und Mobile Suits when

>>43266500
Are you sure? because seaport-hime has been making eyes at me all night and I think she wants my Cargo Ship

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>>43266543
Are you the same person that wanted to murder Willie?

>>43266574
All ya gotta do is make a shell that looks like a Kaiten.
And for extra trauma, maybe a thing inside of it that taps it so it makes that sound what like the sailors made when Arizona sunk.
Y'know, for fun!

>>43266333
Meh. Writer agency. Though I am glad I an not the only one who kinda thinks that is bullshit.

>>43266651
Look man, you want to try fucking the abomination against Man and God? Go ahead.

I'll be over there. Away from the splash zone.

>>43266660
... Is that you Satan?

>>43266658
Where the fuck is that gif from?

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KTKM is for loving, not abusing.

>>43266698
Dunno. I saved it off /k/ years ago.

>>43266698
Iraq back during the US occupation. I recall this being taken from a video clip of some private security contractors fucking with each other.

I'm starting to think there's just one guy, fishing for the chance to make anon do the dumbest shit possible.

>>43266333
You say that like the Yak would have let himself be taken alive

>>43266704
KTKM is a fucking shit and a horrible fucking person to boot. AS with most IJN ships, she was fucking useless in the actual war and because muh lesbians in KC she's popular even though she's a fucking emotionless bitch and ooi is a fucking shit cherry on top of the shit pie that is Kitakami.

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>>43266704
pls go

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>>43266495
Noice

>>43266704
You mean ruthlessly pawning in video games, that old hag thinks she can play! pffffttt.

>>43266740
That one that tried to recruit Naka did.

Kinda of want to know what happen to him with Goto...

>>43266698

some mercenaries in a helicopter trolling a different group of mercenaries during the occupation of iraq

>>43266734
Yes. He's called the human capacity for stupidity when in numbers higher than 4.

>>43266734
Decu is at work.

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>>43266743
Serious bait, mate.

>>43266572
ATTAROUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

>>43266740

These guys are criminals, most criminals don't actually want to die

>>43266762

There's a reason humans operate most effectively in groups of 3

>>43266743
She's popular because preemptive torpedos are extremely useful.

>>43266773
Most people don't want to die, as a general rule.

>>43266767
Ok, the missiles under her dress is awesome.

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>>43266646
>mfw capital ships are really good in G-Gen

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You slice your gaze back onto Arizona with a sharpness that makes her angry visage falter.

“Who the *hell* do you think I am, Arizona?” you ask quietly. The alcohol is still burning in your system, fuzzing the room, but the sharp electric pulse of the adrenaline is still with you too, your blood still thundering hot through your limbs. “Do I look like a god damned child to you?”

Her lips part slightly angry tears still trickling down her cheeks. She holds her hands up and turns an imaginary wheel, then pokes you in the chest, hard, and makes a hooking motion in air with her pinky finger.

“What? A ride? So I felt like fucking walking, is that a mistake?”

She makes the hook motion in the air twice more, her mouth twisting between a frown and a sob.

>>43266785
Bullshit.

>>43266776

Source please.

No seriously, that sounds like an interesting study, and I want to read the report.

Hoppo may be cute but she's an Abyssal....and wouldn't let me take her home..So! Have quadruple cuteness!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QnlEg-BSHD8

>>43266789
Torpedos, anon.

>>43266574
Becasue if it hurts KTKM (or any other IJN ship) I'm all fucking for it. Fucking useless fucking Nipnongs and they goddamn honor bullshit and their fucking bullying and their nationalist confrontationlsit bullshit just give the shipgirls over to the USN and let them actually be used and deployed and fucknig useful instead of LOL SO QUIRKY KONGOU DESS and MUH YAMOTO DAMASHI and MUH KTKM and MUH FUCKING USELESS WAAAAAH LEMME CRY SOME MORE NAKA FUCK YOU 2-4-11 2-4-11 2-4-11

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>>43266734
yes, his name is planefag !!0ZviLFh59My

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>>43266743
Hey.

That's rude.

>>43266812
... Do you need a moment?

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Have a Hood.

>>43266798
>makes a hooking motion in air with her pinky finger.
Is Ari implying that Settle just got b8ed?

>>43266812
Jesus, don't pop a blood vessel.

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I wonder...
If Naka is really split between herself and Light Cruiser Oni to the point where she thinks it's affecting her personality, wonder if that works in reverse too?

>>43266812
Geez, I was just messing around with the Kaiten idea, anon.
Are you feeling alright?

>>43266773
But they are honorabru Nippon criminals, and I think they don't like being taken alive, especially if they are part of the uber-nationalists.

>>43266812
Jesus christ dude go smoke some pot or something.

>>43266812
So... why, exactly, are you even reading this thread if you so clearly hate everything about KanColle?

>>43266832
Yes. Yes he does. Sadly, what he needs and what he wants are different things.

>>43266839
Probably.

It's also probably less than it affects Naka. Because it's easier to hate and be angry than anything else.

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>>43266363
>Hoppou dancing with DesDiv6

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“Promised?”

She nods once, and stomps her foot - Goto winces as the tile cracks.

“So what? Want me to promise not to lose your good tupperware? Promise not to stay up past nine? Promise to brush my fucking TEETH?” you snap. “Naka came in and wanted to chitchat and she brought a bottle so I got drunk. Listening to my people's my goddamned job. I felt like thinking, I went for a fucking WALK. If I want to go for a damn walk, Arizona, I go for one. And I don't need you or HIM-” you jab your finger at Goto, “or that FUCKING PRIMA DONNA MARINE-” you bellow this at the door with your hands cupped around your mouth - “to hold my fucking hand!”

Arizona's expression quavers - then crumples. You see her closing her eyes, mouth finally collapsing into a frown as she turns from you, the first stifled sob escaping her halfway to the door. A pang of guilt surfaces in your chest, but it fades quickly - you're mad, mad, MAD, and it's not going anywhere fast, not tonight, not now.

>>43266812
This is poor quality bait.

>>43266859
There's american ships and he was hoping for americawank I presume.

>>43266817
TONIGHT, DEFENDING HIS TITLE AS THE NUMBER ONE SHIT POSTER IN ESS DUBYA QUEUE, THE GREEK QM WITH UNPAID DEBNTS, AND HIS NAME IS planefag !!0ZviLFh59My

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>>43266812
This is low quality trolling, anon.

>>43266837
No, I think she's trying to remind Settle that he made a promise to call for her and a ride, which he promptly broke.

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>>43266812
2edgu4mepoi!

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“Settle-”

“Goto, stow it,” you snap. “I'm drunk and angry and I can't promise I won't bite your head off too.”

“Before or after you fuck me?”

The doctor decides to leave the fucking room at this point, snatching up his clipboard and dashing out the door.

“Like a praying mantis?”

“Or those sexy assassins in all the manga.”

“You read that trash?”

“Only far enough to find tits, then I show it to the midshipman I caught with it and stare till he shakes.”
You grit your teeth and pinch the bridge of your nose, sighing miserably. “Stop being so humane, asshole.”

“Go home and sleep it off, asshole.”

And eventually, you take his advice.

----

Morning is HELL.

You manage to pry the back off your smartphone and toss the battery away, a process requiring only gross motor skills. Since you're already up, you feel your way to the little kitchenette and shake some fish food in the general direction of the fishbowl, where the blurry shape of your dogfish darts to the top to chase the sinking bits. That reminds you of the cane, and then the sword and then the whole fucking mess and your head hurts too much to think about that right now so you crawl back to bed and sleep.

You were hurt.

You were wounded.

Fuck them all - this is your day off. You're an Admiral now. A hero, they said. Can't they give you a day off?

Can't you rest?

Just for one fucking day....

rest....

That's about when someone splashes a big glass of water on your face.

[ ] RAMMING SPEED [BUMBUMBUMBUMBUMBUMBUMBUMBUMBUMBUMBUM]
[ ] DIVE UNDER THE LAYER AND RIG FOR SILENT RUNNING
[ ] CRAZY IVAN CRAZY IVAN

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>>43266877

>>43266572
>Yandarizona
>St. Lewdie
>Hornyet

>>43266605
I went and looked up Ari's christening. Ari was launched right in the middle of Prohibition when alchohol was basically haram. Normally ships are launched with champaign or something similar but there was a lot of resistance to this at the time. So while a bottle of wine was presented they also had a bottle of the first water to pass over Roosevelt Dam. In the end they decided to use both at the ceremony.

TLDR in this picture Arizona is wearing nothing but a wet American flag with wine running down her everything.

And you just know she's going to walk into Settle's office one day and find her framed photo on his desk.

>>43266913
>[ ] DIVE UNDER THE LAYER AND RIG FOR SILENT RUNNING

>>43266877
Fucking knew it planefag wants tears and figures he'll just take the low road and make us snap at somebody and naturally we're not allowed to do anythnig but choose between three arbitrary fucking choices that he's already decided how to interpret so no matter what actual choices we pick it's all fucking leading down the same fucking road because GOTTA GE THEM TEARS RIGHT AMIRITE PLANEFAG DRINKS ANON TEARS SO FAHNY SO EPIK XD XD XD

>>43266913
>[] Why?

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>>43266877

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>>43266913
>[ ] CRAZY IVAN CRAZY IVAN

>>43266913
>[ ] RAMMING SPEED [BUMBUMBUMBUMBUMBUMBUMBUMBUMBUMBUMBUM]

>>43266913
>[ ] RAMMING SPEED [BUMBUMBUMBUMBUMBUMBUMBUMBUMBUMBUMBUM]
Maybe the CNO needs to come down on Settle with both feet now.

>>43266913
>[x] DIVE UNDER THE LAYER AND RIG FOR SILENT RUNNING
NO, NOT THE KONGO!

ANYTHING BUT KONGO.

>>43266913
>[ ] CRAZY IVAN CRAZY IVAN

>>43266913
>[ ] CRAZY IVAN CRAZY IVAN

I don't know what this means, but it sounds like it'd be funniest.

>>43266913
>[X] DIVE UNDER THE LAYER AND RIG FOR SILENT RUNNING