>Cast Fireball
>A non-descript palm sized ball appears in your palm and hurtles towards the point you aim at.

>Ghoul Touch
>Your hand is magically lead to the nearest ghoul for you to feel

>>42885962
>Cast Find Familiar
>Glowing arrow points at the closest thing you're familiar with

>color spray
>alters the color of any stream or splash of liquid

>blade ward
>protects knives and swords

>cloudkill
>disintegrates a cloud or patch of fog

>sunburst
>destroy the solar system

>Time Stop
>You know exactly how long you cease moving for

>Hold Monster
>You embrace the nearest reprehensible person

>Fire Bolt
>A crime fighting dog loses it job

>>42886081
>cloudkill
>murders an ex-SOLDIER

>Turn Undead
>you rotate the nearest nonliving entity in the desired direction.

>Ironwood
>Removes all the creases from a wooden object

>>42885962
The question I ask myself is, "Why is /tg/ greentext shitposter-tan not banned yet?"

>>42886554
>Turn Undead
>Become a Skeleton

>Bull's strength
Determine the ability modifier of nearest Bull's strength score.

>>42885962
>cast blink
>everyone around you blinks

>>42886742
shut up, it has potential for being amusing

>>42888287
>cast Shocking Grasp
>grope the nearest living being

>>42888287
>Cast blink
>You blink

I'm sure some guy somewhere would find applications for both versions of the spell.

>>42886742
the irony

>>42888287

So could someone cast a longer version of blink and make people shut their eyes for a few seconds, or would the effect be people continue to blink for a few seconds?

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>>42886261
>>Fire Bolt
>>A crime fighting dog loses it job
Ha

>Book titled "Spell Book"
>It's a dictionary

>Burning Hands
>Hands begin to smolder

>Detect Thoughts
>begin thinking about spells

>Blur
>Four english blokes with instruments appear

>cast knock
>a sharp rapping sound echoes throughout the room on the other side of the door

>>42888771
>Detect thoughts
>You are now able to tell whether or not someone is thinking

>>42888875
... that could be really useful to spot mimics

>>42888528
>Book titled "spell book"
>contains in big letters "B-O-O-K" on every page

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>Plane Shift

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>>42890905
I lol'd.

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>>42888457
>Amelia Bedelia the spellcaster

oh god no

>Repair Light Damage
>Repair the nearest source of light.

>>42891409
Fuck yeah, never have to buy bulbs ever again!

>Bigby's Grasping Hand
>Summon Bigby's actual physical hand, in the exact condition that it is at the moment of casting, to grasp an object.

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>>42886054
>Ghoul Touch
>The nearest ghoul's hand is magically lead to you to feel you

>Identify Magical Item
>Disembodied voice says: "Yes, this book IS magical, how did you guess?"

>leomund's tiny hut
>you summon what is essentially a dollhouse replica of leomund's infamous hut

>Slide
>Open a powerpoint presentation

>Celebration
You throw a party

>Erase
>Erases itself from the spellbook

>veil
>summons a wedding veil

>anti magic field
>summons a sentient field who hates magic. His existence is suffering.

>>42885972
wouldn't that be 'Cast Fire Ball'?

>>42885962
>Cast Featherfall
>Feathers spontaneously appear and fall to the ground around the caster

>>42894065
Fizban? Is that you?

>>42894090
n-no

>>42885962
> literal spell book
It is a school book that helps children with their spelling.

>Mass suggestion
>You get a megaphone

>Cure wounds
>You salt, dry and smoke a wound

>Stoneskin
>Your skin turns into actual stone

>Cloud of daggers
>You summon a cloud of dagger-particles

>Find traps
>Opens 4chan

>>42894209
>Mass suggestion
>You ask someone to gain/lose weight

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>>42894090

Dragonlance books...

Childhood feels.

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>>42894226

>Tenser's Floating Disk
You summon a circular pontoon.
>Raise Dead
Target corpse floats upwards.

>>42892052
could still be useful
I mean sometimes you don't care what kind of magic it is, just whether it is magical or not(e.g. Rings, Clothing)

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>Raise Undead
You conjure an undead infant to nurture into a respectable member of society

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>>42895008
That is adorable.

>>42888858
Sounds like a horror story

>Cast Weird
>Hmm. That's weird...

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>>42891169
>Amelia Bedelia the spellcaster

>detect secret
>"Anon likes little girls"

>>42895540
The joke is that it's literally knocking on the door

>Phantasmal Killer
>kills phantasm

>Glue Seal
>Target seal is unable to move, but retains ability to bark

>Weird
>Glowing arrow points back at you

>>42890766

I want to make a dungeon boss a half senile Lich, and I am going to add this to it.

>>42891169
>>42895590
Many will die. They will be the lucky ones.

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>>42892052
>Identify magical item
>"yep, its a book alright"

>Tongues
>Causes all people in a 15ft radius to stick out their tongues.

>>42891409
>Cure Light Wounds
>Cure's the nearest wound with a light covering of Salt.

>>42891409
>Repair Light Damage
>counteracts color fading from extended exposure to sunlight

>orient self
>become chinese

>dispel magic
Nothing happens, or the spell dispels itself.

>Seal Magic
You fire a seal at the enemy.

>Mage's Hand
Summons a severed hand from a mage.

>Contact other Plane

You are now a radio operator.

>Polymorph Any Object
>Polymorphs something, somewhere

>>42894209
>Stoneskin
>You conjure the nearest family member of a nearby rock.

>Blend
>Target is violently shredded to a milkshake consistency

>>42900291
>orient self
>creates a chinese doppleganger

>>42901813
>Stoneskin
>Target rock is wrapped in a layer of soft, warm flesh.

>Hide from Undead
>teleport the skin from the nearest undead creature to your hands

>>42901857
>Stoneskin
>Shaves off the outer layer of a rock and forms it into a pelt

Cloud Shape
>Your body takes the shape of a cloud. Just the shape.

Plant Voice
>Plants don't talk. Use this on annoying people.

>>42901883
>Stoneskin
>pelts target family member with rocks

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>>42902057
>>Your body takes the shape of a cloud. Just the shape.
How horrifying.

>>42902057
>Plant Voice
>Secretly leaves a voice somewhere on the person of the target.

>>42885962
>Glitterdust
Transmute all dust into glitter

>Mage Armor
>Gives you a suit of armor made out of mages

>Memory Lapse
>Hey, what happened to my spell slot?

>Ear-Piercing Scream
>Everyone who hears you scream immediately gets an earring in each ear.

I hear that last one is pretty good against elves

>>42902804
HowHorrifying.jpg

>Gaseous Form
Creates vaporous paperwork.

>>42902640
>Plant Voice
Give the nearest plant the ability to speak

>>42903264

I like to imagine most plants are immensely racist.

>>42896010
>>Phantasmal Killer
>>kills phantasm
Henry Olusegun Adeola Samuel becomes magically rooted to the spot.

>Cure Light Wounds
Cures sunburns

>Cure Moderate Wounds
Cures mental scars created by a forum/chat moderator

>Speak With Animals
Compels you to make unintelligible noises when any animal is aroundl; Lasts for one hour

>Unseen Servant
Render target butler or maid invisible.

>>42886081
>blade ward
>forces you to ensure the wellbeing of the nearest sharp implement

>Burning Hands
Sets all hands in the area on fire.

>Dimension door
You now know the exact dimensions of the nearest door

>Xing Ray/Ray of X
Summons Ray Romano, and gives him a 10ft aura of the desired effect.

>>42901632
But only if you're also on a plane.

>Animate object
Creates a sequence of pictures of desired object, each with a tiny difference in its position or movement.

>Barkskin
Your skin now makes barking noises.

>Flesh to Stone
Flesh will try to align itself towards the nearest stone.

>Cure Serious Wounds
Only works if you're not amused.

>Detect Snares and Pits
Doubly useless, will tell you if you're close to either peaches or drums.

>Disintegrate
Due to a wizard with poor math skills, this will give you a derivative of some function.

>Pass without Trace
If she's getting really annoying, you could just leave her behind.

>Minor Creation
Creates a miniature reality.
>Major Creation
"My friends, it has often been said-" etc etc.

>Grease
Sprays lard all over the place.

>Minor Creation
Creates a child.
>Major Creation
Creates a military officer.

>>42886687
I lost it.

>Cone of Cold
Summons a Cornetto.

>Mass suggestion
>"You should go to church."

>Ensnaring Strike
Makes people join a worker's protest.

>>42885962
Please stop forcing your shitty fucking drawings, thanks.

>>42886261
>Fire Bolt
>a shitty Australian newspaper hack that wishes he was Rush Limbaugh loses his job

>>42894209
Cure wounds could be a nice interrogation tool

>Lay On Hands
>you feel a strange compulsion next time you rest to give yourself pins-and-needles

>>42903548
>grease
>Everyone breaks into song

>>42885972
>Fireball
>one of your balls explodes in a blast of fire

>>42904074
OOH OOH OOH, HONEY

>>42886752
I keke'd

>>42890766
AYYYYY

>>42902804
This is a war crime.

>>42903554
>Major Creation
Creates Major Major Major Major.
He's very confused.

>>42903554
>Major Creation
Creates a short burst of notes that sounds happy.
>Minor Creation
Creates a short burst of notes that sounds sad.

>Chain Lightning
>Hold target lightning bolt prisoner

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>>42902804

>>42886742
It's really not, though. It's not a "Hey, /tg/, I want to play a Kender straight, wat do?", "Excuse me, Commissar" or "le anime reaction image thread", for example.

>>42904324
Don't worry about him too much. There was a minor invasion over the weekend, and it's easy to get confused and to lash out at everything and anything.

>>42901638
That's super evil.

>>42885962
> Detect Magic
>Detect's itself as magic

>Burning Hands
Summons a maids and/or butlers... who happen to always be on fire.

>Burning hands
Causes the hands on all clocks within range to ignite.

>Death Ward
You become the legal guardian of the Grim Reaper

>Prayer
Summons a monk to your side

>Identify
Compels the caster to shout his name, occupation and home country

>Find the Path
Makes the caster realize that he must become the path before he can find the path

>Insect Plague
Bugs get infected with a disease with a certain radius of the caster

>>42888875
This is actually what the spell does at the lowest level. Go figure.

My group came up with "misspells" for shits and giggles.

>Speak with Dad
Summons your father. You two catch up. It's really nice.
>Mime Stop
>Detect Weevil
>Polymorph Shelf
>Clownburst

>>42903530
>Disintegrate
Huehuehue

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>>42905384

>Clownburst

>Divine Intervention
>Your god comes down to have a sincere talk about your hoarding problems

>>42886071
>Your Crotch

>>42885962

>mass suggestion
>compels nearby individuals to guess at each other's weight

>>42905474
Mass =/= weight, but nice try.

I'd say that the spell gives you a suggestion of the mass of something. Not a good suggestion, though.

>>42896010
LMAO at Glue Seal

>>42904184
This would actually be really useful for some sort of energy source

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>>42903404
Sounds useful to me.

>Blur
90s pop rock start playing.

>>42904074

This spell is hyyyyyyyyydromatic.

>>42905791
Is it Ultramatic?

>>42886321
>Cloudkill
>The internet storage goes down.

>Breach
Knocks holes in things

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>>42901632
>Contact other Plane

>>42891169
Who?

>>42898540
>Miley Cyrus music video

>>42886742
Who cast 'remove fun' on you this morning?

>>42903264
>plant voice.
When you try to speak vegetable matter erupts from your mouth.

Or.

Your voice is now emanating from a fixed point three feet underground.

>>42901601
> dispel magic
All ritten spells now contain spelling erors

>>42905513
Mass suggestion.

Compel nearby individuals to attend church.

A must have for any cleric.

>>42891409
>Repair Light damage
>Cures sunburn

>teleport
Spell book teleports out of your hands to a random location

>teleport
you inform a port of something

>>42905443
Could be useful against dragons.

>protection from law
>you gain diplomatic immunity

>>42909882
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SiXNUaSjXRY

>>42907368

And then this happens. >>42905384

>>42901829
>will it blend?
>that is the question

>See Invisible
Caster can see invisible things. And nothing else.
>Mirror Image
Reverse target image.
>Water Breathing
Casters lungs fill with water.

>>42904074
Interesting. Tell me more!

>>42910662
>Magic Missile
>summons a projectile rocket powered by magic

>>42911320

>Magically a missile with a live warhead appears in front of you - better run!

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>42905384
>Clownburst

Summons a rock and roll clown, two clownettes, and a mountain of cocaine. Roll 1d6 for name of clown and another for behavior.

Name:
1-6: Doctor Rockso

Behavior:
1-6: Does Cocaine

>>42915532
What is this? A clown for ants?

>>42891169
>>42895590
http://www.dorkly.com/post/71065/why-amelia-bedelia-is-the-most-terrifying-character-ever#item-1

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>>42903627

>>42888858
>a sharp rapping sound echoes throughout the room on the other side of the door
>a sharp rapping sound
Wouldn't it be easier to just Summon Eminem?

>>42907442
>repair light damage
>cures any and all electromagnetic radiation-based illnesses and diseases

>>42894065
From the John Woo school of spellcasting

>>42886752
I remember the first time I played Morrowind I thought that the skill literally turned you into an undead and was disappointed that it didn't.

>>42903300
They're also psuedointellectuals. What with the self-pollenization, it's literally jerking yourself off to yourself

>>42888358
>cast blink
>everyone around you blinks

I can see it being useful for a tense duel or something. Force your enemy to close their eyes for just long enough for you to fatally stab them.

>>42902640
>Echoes act 1
>>42903433
Frustratingly enough, no moving company uses this
>>42903530
>Disintegrate
You have made Strom Thurmond so proud
>>42903534
>Major Creation
Summons a leg-lamp.
>>42903612
>Cone of Cold
Summons a Cornetto, along with its accompanying Simon Pegg movie

>>42905384
>Mime Stop
>*sign language for "The world"*

>>42904961
>Death Ward

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lDHbnnWGb4U

>>42918330

I'd stop the world and melt with you.

>magic weapon
Nearest weapon turns into a wand that is faintly magical.

> Shocking Weapon
Nearest weapon turns into an erect bull penis.

> Charm person
A miniature decorative ornament appears in the shape of a human.

> Sleep
Caster goes to sleep

>Sleep Mass
Nothing happens, everyone at mass is already asleep.

> Blur
Casters vision becomes hazy.

> Finger of death
A finger appears, followed by an extremely angry man in a cloak made of shadows.

>>42918457
[Modern English] and [Bowling For Soup] would be cool Stands

>>42918522

>[Dragonforce]
>[Blind Guardian]
>[Sabaton]

>>42918546
The joke is that Modern English did the original "I Melt With You", Bowling for Soup did a cover

>>42918272
I think you mean shoot.

>>42919607
Peasant.

> ghost armour
Your armour dies

>>42921650
>Ghost Armour
You get armor made of ghost. They wail while you try to sleep and weapons pass right through them.

>>42921650
>ghost armour
Armour disconnects from the IRC server. He wonders how you knew his password.