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/tg/ - Traditional Games


You are a goat. Your name is Goat who is the Protagonist.

Countless years have past since the legendary heroine Goat who Reclaimed the Tower usurped her treacherous herd leader and guided her brethren back to their holy goat tower. Though she lives no longer, her deeds are bleated of to this day, passed from mother to kid. You desire one day to accomplish great deeds and rival her in renown...

...but right now, you have more pressing concerns. Goat who is Your Mother has bleated for you, breaking you out of your reverie. You had been daydreaming in the corner of your pen. Goat who is very Loud stands next to her in the center of the pasture, looking at you expectantly. Your other herdmates - eight in all - are milling about with their own business.

>What will you do, Goat who is the Protagonist?
>>
>>42676614
Head over to Mother Goat. Prepare your oft-repeated speech that you have been planning and revising, which focuses on overthrowing the humans once and for all, yet again.
>>
>>42676614
>>What will you do, Goat who is the Protagonist?

I'm going to track down the BBEG and give him the bleating of his life.
>>
>>42676614
Try, as always, to headbutt Goat who is very Loud.
>>
>>42676614
>Second
Where's the first? I can already tell this is amazing.
>>
>>42676796
This
>>
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>>42676796
Goat who is very Loud incenses you. She always had a tendency to bleat late at night, and the noise keeps you up. So you trot up to the two of them...

...and, as always, attempt to headbutt her. For once, you get a clean hit, and Goat who is very Loud crumples into a silly position.

Goat who is Your Mother is not pleased. "You must stop your feud, Goat who is my Kid."

This again. As herd leader, Goat who is Your Mother would always try to promote harmony, something your spats with Goat who is very Loud would deter.

"But that is not why I called you here," she bleats. "I have heard things beyond the fence."

>>42676770
"Beyond the fence?" You reply. "Are you actually able to understand the two-legged goats our herd will one day crush beneath our hooves?"

"I will not hear of your silly revolution once again, Goat who is my Kid. A goat similar to us was there. She bleated many things to me."

"Things such as?"

"She claims she has seen the goat tower of legend."

>What will you do, goat who is the protagonist?
>>
>>42676858
http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/32074324/
http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/32112265/
>>
>>42677183
Sneakily kick Goat who is very Loud with a back hoof. Goat who is Your Mother probably won't notice.
>>
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>>42677267
The goat tower? THAT goat tower?! Can it truly be?

"She is an outsider, but it may very well be possible. I want to confirm her claims, but I fear Goat who Milks Us will not allow it. Therefore, I am planning an escape from our pen. Will you aid-"

While Goat who is Your Mother bleats, you sneakily kick Goat who is very Loud in the back of the head. It spins completely around her neck before righting itself.

You thought you could get away with it, but Goat who is very Loud had other plans. "STOP DOING THAT, GOAT WHO IS THE PROTAGONIST!!!" She screams with enough force to break your herdmates out of their reverie, as per usual. Goat who is Your Mother glares at you briefly.

>What will you do, Goat who is the Protagonist?
>>
>>42677665
Bleat ashamedly.
>>
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Holy shit its the second coming of goat quest hello based Goat QM
>>
>>42677665

This. >>42677866
>>
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>>42677866
You hang your head in shame. "Very well. Forgive my indiscretions."

Goat who is Your Mother nods. "Now then. As I was bleating, I am attempting to escape from our pen, and I require your aid. Will you join me in this potentially noble endeavor?"

"Will we crush the two-legged oppressors if we do so?"

Goat who is Your Mother glares at you again. "...perhaps, if the rumors hold true."

You look at Goat who is very Loud. She continues to lay on the grass, her limbs contorted in ways that should not be. Also, her head is twitching and flailing against the ground, disappearing into it occasionally.

>What will you do, Goat who is the Protagonist?
>>
>>42678114
We shall assist the Goat who is Our Mother in escaping.
>>
>>42678114
Assist Goat who is Our Mother in escaping for now, but keep an eye open for a source of power that could aid us in overthrowing the two-legged ones.

There is no sacrifice too great.
>>
>>42678045
>Yup. Hello based Goat Quest fan

>>42678189
>>42678255
"I will gladly aid you," you bleat to Goat who is Your Mother. Even if you don't find the goat tower, you may find what is required to overthrow the two-legged menace.

"Thank you, Goat who is My Kid. Know that what we are doing may be the most important thing to happen to goatkind since Goat who Reclaimed the Tower."

"How shall we escape?" You ask.

"It is said that the legend herself knocked over some of her pen's fence panels. Perhaps we could do the same with ours." "I will search one side, you will take another. And Goat who is very Loud-"

"WILL EXAMINE A THIRD!" The twitching goat laying on the ground screams, quickly righting herself as if nothing happened. Goat who is very Loud is involved in this, too? Baphomet's horns...

>What will you do, Goat who is the Protagonist?
>>
>>42678422
We shall examine the fence panels for signs of weakness, and BREAK THROUGH WITH OUR GOAT POWER!
>>
>>42678422
Lick.
Everything.
>>
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>>42678596
Goat who is Your Mother once told you that Goat who Reclaimed the Tower solved many of her problems by licking them. Perhaps you could solve a few of your own if you did the same.

Since Goat who is very Loud has not gone off to check out the fence, you lick her, and once again she crumples into a heap. "THAT IS NOT FUNNY, GOAT WHO IS THE PROTAGONIST!"

Once again, your herd is staring at you. Baphomet's horns, you wish she would be more quiet.

>>42678478
Nevertheless, you have a fence to break down, and you amble towards one end with a bit of difficulty, your tongue stretching out to ridiculous lengths as it drags Goat who is very Loud along the ground, her limbs once again twitching and slinging along randomly.

You poke at the wooden panels, and they give easily. Looking back to her end, Goat who is Your Mother has accomplished a similar feat. Why did you not do this sooner?

The actual escape takes a bit of effort, as Goat who is very Loud - still attached to your tongue - gets caught in between the panels, but the three of you are now outside of your pen.

>What will you do, Goat who is the Protagonist?
>>
>>42678747
Run free and wild!
>>
>>42678747
>Whoops, should've forgotten to add this:

A pair of the two-legged archenemy are walking by. They stare at the both of you.
>>
>>42678782
>Should've forgotten

The fuck is wrong with me tonight?
>>
>>42678782
RUN.
FREE.
AND.
WILD!
>>
>>42678782
The time of reckoning is neigh! Whip out tongue at the two legged devils, Goat Who Is Too Loud will collide with them and Goat Who Is Our Mother and I will escape in the confusion!
>>
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>>42678836
>>42678780
Freedom. You have escaped your pen. What better way to enjoy it than run free and wild?

The two-legged goats mean nothing to you right now, and they go off on their way as you frolic in the street, Goat who is very Loud stilll dragged along by your tongue. "STOP DOING THAT, GOAT WHO IS THE PROTAGONIST!" She bleats.

Your reverie is cut short as something slams into you - it is a large, noisy goat with spinning hooves. The force sends you flying into a tree, convulsing against it briefly before you land on the ground, splayed in a comical position.

Goat who is very Loud is no longer attached to your tongue, you realize as you right yourself. Moreover, Goat who is Your Mother is trotting up to you.

"Where is Goat who is very Loud?"

"RIGHT HERE!" You hear a deafening bleat from the house next to the tree you hit. Goat who is very Loud's body has half-disappeared into it, once again twitching hilariously before falling out.

"This is not the time for foolishness," Goat who is Your Mother scolds. "If the rumors are true, the goat tower is down that road." She turns to a large tunnel where goats with spinning hooves vanish and emerge. "We must hurry, before Goat who Milks Us gives pursuit."

>What will you do, Goat who is the Protagonist?
>>
>>42678989
Surely the large goats with spinning hooves will aid us in our noble quest, ask them for aid in traversing the darkness of the tunnel
>>
>>42678989
We shall make haste to the tower!

Maximum speed!
>>
>>42679027
this
bleat in a seductive fashion at the Goats with Spinning Hooves
>>
>>42679027
>>42679097
Given the haste they are capable of, you suspect that it would be much quicker to employ one of the spinning-hoofed goats than traverse the tunnel with your own.

One begins to quickly approach. You let out your sexiest bleat in an attempt to curry its favor...

...and it passes by, ignoring you completely. How rude.

To make matters worse, you hear the familiar angry bleating of a certain two-legged goat. Goat who Milks You has caught wind of your escape, and is quickly approaching.

>What will you do, Goat who is the Protagonist?
>>
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>>42679294
WE RIDE!
>>
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>>42679318
(through the eyes of the unenlighten)
>>
>>42679294
QUICK
SWITCH TO
GOAT SPEED
AHEAD
FASTER FASTER
UNTIL THE THRILL OF SPEED
OVERCOMES THE FEAR OF DEATH
>>
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>>42679318
>>42679363
Goat who Milks You knows of your plans, and because you have stalled for too long, he will most likely pursue you until you are caught.

However, if the rumors of the goat tower and possibly revolution are true, not even Baphomet himself will be allowed to stop you.

"We must flee!" you bleat, as you, Goat who is Your Mother and Goat who is very Loud bolt into the tunnel. Goat who Milks You's bleating is largely drowned out by the roar of the spinning-hoofed goats, but can still be heard.

And then one bleat drowns out even that.

"HELP ME, GOAT WHO IS THE PROTAGONIST!"

Goat who is very Loud has been caught by Goat who Milks You. Baphomet's horns...

>What will you do, Goat who is the Protagonist?
>>
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>>42679460
Though we hate Goat Who Is Too Loud, she is one of us, our noble goat heart cannot abandon those who quest beside us

Headbutt Goat who Milks Us into the large uncaring goats of the tunnel, it is their land, they will judge the worthy from the unworthy
>>
>>42679524
if we can hit him in the Goat-Parts on the way that would be nice
>>
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>>42679524
You do not like Goat who is very Loud. She is a nuisance, and you wish she would go away.

However, a fellow goat is being suppressed by the archenemy. You cannot stand for this.

With an angry bleat, you charge at Goat who Milks You, the force of your headbutt causing him to lose his grip on Goat who is very Loud. Goat who is Your Mother, who seemed to share your sentiments, follows up by getting behind him and kicking him into the street, where he is struck by one of of the noisy goats beside you, and rolled away under its spinning hooves.

"Are you well, Goat who is very Loud?!" You bleat, raising your voice so it is not drowned out by the noise.

"YES, GOAT WHO IS THE PROTAGONIST! THANK YOU FOR SAVING ME! YOU TOO, GOAT WHO IS HERD LEADER!"

"I am glad you are unharmed, Goat who is very Loud!" Goat who is your mother shouts back. "However, we cannot remain here! Let us hurry onwards, before Goat who Milks Us returns!"

The danger passed, the three of you trot on and clear the tunnel...

...and find yourselves eyes deep in two-legged territory. Their homes grow bigger and bigger the farther you get from the tunnel, along with their numbers.

"According to the rumors, the goat tower is ahead," Goat who is Your Mother bleats, pointing in the direction of a clump of large, shining towers in the distance.

However, the sight of them worries you. "Which one?"

>I think this is a good stopping point for tonight. Next thread'll come tomorrow night, unless this one's still up. Thanks for playing!
>>
>>42679749
surely the biggest and shiniest tower must be the goat tower of legend
>>
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goat bump



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