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>>40375624
Speaking of which, the SECOND thing you did was clear away the lava-burnt wreckage that used to be a human house. That particular building was apparently made by said fearmonger, and you don't want anything to do with it.

And then, breaking down and reweaving the fabric of the dreamstuff all around you, you start terraforming.

Here in Gamindustri, you haven't been able to build any PROPER fortresses. Other than the hole-in-the-ground you'd lived in (back when you first met Mojang), it's all been emergency shacks and above-ground hidey-holes rather than anything beneath the earth. And while you /could/ channel straight down into the dirt- lots of fortresses got their start like that- you really wanna dig into the side of a proper hillock rather than scoop out some sort of earthen sphincter.

Gritting your teeth, you close your hands into fists and /pull/ against an invisible force, and with a tolerant rumble, the dirt swells up into a modestly-sized hill- one that's big enough to provide soil for underground farms and sand for a glass industry, and small enough to be easily defensible once you get rid of the ramps and get some proper outer walls in place. You walk around its perimeter, and nod in satisfaction- perhaps MOST importantly, it's symmetrical, so carving a three tile wide entrance into the hill won't immediately turn the rest of the thing into a goddamn eyesore and force you to spend valuable work hours (and possibly dwarven lives) adding walls to bring it back into properly dwarven feng shui.

Some people would call you obsessive. You prefer to think that it's the little things in life that give you happiness.

>Combat Mining unlocked!
>Urist can now dig, channel, and remove ramps while in combat, at a rate of one z-level (5 ft vertically) and/or two tiles (10 ft horizontally) per turn.

(Cont.)

>>40375635
You look up from your work to take a quick glance around. The dwarves are still clustered off to the side, somewhat like migrants waiting for a way into a fortress; most of them have their arms crossed, now, and a few seem to be shooting you surly looks. Almost to a dwarf, they're grumbling to each other, and it's audible even from where you're standing.

Over on the other side, those shadowy figures are gradually growing more cohesive, although they still look like so much white mist; some seem to be turning humanoid, while the others are stretching into strange shapes and even stranger sizes.

[ ] [KEEP BUILDING] Ignore everything else around you. Time is of the essence, and you've got to make a decent beginner's fort!
[ ] [CONFRONT DWARVES] Okay, for being figments of your imagination, those dwarves grumbling is getting a little annoying. Go see what they want.
[ ] [CONFRONT FIGURES] Okay, there is nothing reassuring about shadowy figures turning into strange shapes. Go carefully check out what's going on.
[ ] [PRACTICE SUMMONING] Right then, back to business- you need something to help you not drown when you wake up. What better time to practice summoning than here?
[ ] [WAKE UP] Maybe you should stop delaying the inevitable and go back to the land of the living so that you can figure out a way to STAY in the land of the living!
[ ] [WRITE-IN]

>>40375672
[ ] [PRACTICE SUMMONING] Right then, back to business- you need something to help you not drown when you wake up. What better time to practice summoning than here?

>>40375672
>[x] [KEEP BUILDING] Ignore everything else around you. Time is of the essence, and you've got to make a decent beginner's fort!
Define a meeting area so those migrants walk in.

>>40375700
carp
[ ] [CONFRONT DWARVES] Okay, for being figments of your imagination, those dwarves grumbling is getting a little annoying. Go see what they want.

>>40375672
>[ ] [CONFRONT FIGURES] Okay, there is nothing reassuring about shadowy figures turning into strange shapes. Go carefully check out what's going on.
The ability to call dwarves to our aid would be really awesome

>>40375672

[ ] [CONFRONT DWARVES] Okay, for being figments of your imagination, those dwarves grumbling is getting a little annoying. Go see what they want.

Ask them how the hell they managed to keep their beards in any place even remotely connected to the moe bullshit world that is Gameindustri.

>>40375672
>[ ] [KEEP BUILDING] Ignore everything else around you. Time is of the essence, and you've got to make a decent beginner's fort!

FORT FORT FORT FORT FORT

Okay, looks like we've got a split vote between CONFRONT DWARVES and KEEP BUILDING, so I guess Urist's doing both- writing!

>>40375960
heh, you rock

>>40375672
>[X] [CONFRONT FIGURES] Okay, there is nothing reassuring about shadowy figures turning into strange shapes. Go carefully check out what's going on.
Confrontation!
>[X] [CONFRONT DWARVES] Okay, for being figments of your imagination, those dwarves grumbling is getting a little annoying. Go see what they want.
See how the shadowy figures went first? Want to know why? Because they didn't have snarky comments!

>>40375672
>[X] [CONFRONT DWARVES]
>[X] [KEEP BUILDING]

Right. This's silly. You're not taking time to see what the hell's up with them, not when you've got things to build! Why? Because you're a dwarf, and they're all dwarves, and if a dwarf's gotta problem with another dwarf, then the PROPER thing to do is to air it all out in the open, possibly with their fists- you'll have none of this whispering behind other peoples' backs like a bunch of prissy melodramatic high school girls!

So you don't even bother looking up as you holler out to the dwarves, telling them to get their asses over here, pronto, and then you start digging a proper three-tile-wide tunnel into the side of the hillock. Hell, just to be on the safe side, you designate a meeting area as soon as there's enough indoor space to fit a small group. Sure, this place is supposedly the Arena, a place where you can dick around to your heart's desire without negative consequences, but you're rapidly learning that Gamindustri plays havoc on your abilities- for all you know, you're overdue for a dogoo siege.

Either the dirt's softer in this dreamscape or you're getting to be a better miner: you finish digging out the main entrance hallway (with enough space for future traps, a drawbridge, and a trade depot) just as the first of the dwarves enter the hillock/fortress, and you carve out your first stockpile as the last of them crowd in.

(Cont.)

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>>40376512
To a dwarf, the dwarves are dressed in a strange hodgepodge of outfits, no matching pairs anywhere- it's almost like they all just waltzed in from different civilizations or whatnot. Also to a dwarf, they all look sort of unhappy, so you stop digging and turn to face them, crossing your arms across your chest- your nightgown is filthy, but you wear this dirt as a goddamn badge of properly dwarven honor.

"Alright," you growl, looking to each dwarf in turn- to your mild unease, they've all got at least a few inches on you. "So what's /your/ problem, huh? C'mon, out with it!" you add when no answer is forthcoming.

Eventually, one of the dwarves nearer to the front- some sort of warrior- puffs his chest out and plants his gauntleted hands on his hips, frowning down at you. And then, this symbol of dwarven might, this bearded everydwarf, this representation of everything you wish you were, rumbles his reply:

"Lass, yer not a dwarf."

You barely see some of the dwarves behind him nodding their agreement, because in five goddamn words, that asshole cut you deeper than anything you've ever experienced in Gamindustri.

[ ] [VIOLENCE] Beat the shit out of him, because how dare he question your dwarvenness. How DARE he do that!
[ ] [COUNTERWHY] Why would he even say that? You've got proof that you're a dwarf- the rampant alcoholism, the urge to make fortresses, even the bugs-!
[ ] [KEEP BUILDING] Ignore him. Keep building. You've got a fortress to finish, you can't just- y-you don't-
[ ] [WAKE UP] You don't feel like messing about in the Arena anymore. You'll- you'll come back later.
[ ] [TRY NOT TO CRY] Cry a lot.
[ ] [WRITE-IN]

>>40376578
>Drink heavily
>[ ] [VIOLENCE] Beat the shit out of him, because how dare he question your dwarvenness. How DARE he do that!

>>40376578
>[X] [VIOLENCE] Beat the shit out of him, because how dare he question your dwarvenness. How DARE he do that!
Prove your (at least honorary) Dwarfiness by DRUNKEN BRAWL.

>>40376578
>[ ] [VIOLENCE] Beat the shit out of him, because how dare he question your dwarvenness. How DARE he do that!
>[ ] [TRY NOT TO CRY] Cry a lot.
[ ] [WRITE-IN] THEY STOLE IT, THOSE BASTARDS STOLE MY BEARD!(while crying)

>>40376578
>[x] [TRY NOT TO CRY] Cry a lot.

>>40376578
>[x] [COUNTERWHY] Why would he even say that? You've got proof that you're a dwarf- the rampant alcoholism, the urge to make fortresses, even the bugs-!
Time to skill up on Negotiator and Intimidator

>>40376578
>[ ] [VIOLENCE] Beat the shit out of him, because how dare he question your dwarvenness. How DARE he do that!
>[ ] [COUNTERWHY] Why would he even say that? You've got proof that you're a dwarf- the rampant alcoholism, the urge to make fortresses, even the bugs-!

>>40376578
ooo, I see some stuff I like in the write-ins
>Drink heavily
>[ ] [WRITE-IN] THEY STOLE IT, THOSE BASTARDS STOLE MY BEARD!
>[X] [VIOLENCE] Beat the shit out of him, because how dare he question your dwarvenness. How DARE he do that!

>>40376578
>[ ] [COUNTERWHY] Why would he even say that? You've got proof that you're a dwarf- the rampant alcoholism, the urge to make fortresses, even the bugs-!
>[ ] [KEEP BUILDING] Ignore him. Keep building. You've got a fortress to finish, you can't just- y-you don't-
dig through the tears as we have our little breakdown

>>40376578
>[ ] [WRITE-IN] THEY STOLE IT, THOSE BASTARDS STOLE MY BEARD!
>[ ] [COUNTERWHY] Why would he even say that? You've got proof that you're a dwarf- the rampant alcoholism, the urge to make fortresses, even the bugs-!

>10 votes
>10 IPs
>including Blorp

Try harder, please.

>>40376848
oh shit right I need to delete my old vote
>>40376606
in favor of my new one
>>40376724

Okay, so the votes basically come down to
>VIOLENCE
>TRY NOT TO CRY
>MY BEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAARD

So, writing!

>>40376578
Welcome back, Blorp.

[X]CRY

>>40376932
Thank you!

Also, after looking at the votes again, gonna bake some of >COUNTERWHY into VIOLENCE due to how close the votes were.

>>40377056
dwarfy argument of dwafyness punches included naturally

I like to image every dwarf gasping in horror as Urist says they stole her beard

I gotta leave, but I'm pre-emptively voting on

[Leave the Arena]

for the next part.

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>>40376578
>[X] [VIOLENCOUNTERWHY]
>[X] [TRY NOT TO CRY]
>[X] [FUCKERS STOLE MY BEARD]

It's strange, y'know? It shouldn't hurt so much to have a figment of your imagination throw your greatest, most deeply-buried fear back into your face. Maybe it's something about this place that breaks down all emotional barriers or whatnot- makes it so that you can't lie to yourself or deny your own feelings or whatever metaphorical nonsense happens to brains in the magical moe land of Gamindustri.

Whatever the reason, it's enough to make you feel like the bottom's dropped out of your stomach, and all your pent-up stresses and emotions choose that moment to stab you in the fucking back. Before you know it, you've got water coverings on both your eyes, your breath is hitching, and you're desperately trying not to bawl like the little girl Gamindustri is trying to force you to be. You grit your teeth and angrily drag your sleeve across your face, keeping your voice as steady as possible as you tell the fucker to take that back.

"No," the military dwarf growls back, as implacable as the mountain he was likely carved from. "It's the truth, lass. Yer not a dwarf, y-"

YOU TAKE THAT BACK!

>Urist Twelfthbay cancels Dig: Throwing tantrum.

With a shriek of pure rage, you throw yourself at the surprised dwarf and easily bowl him head over heels, slamming him against the wall. His fellows shrink back as your flailing fists smash into his helmet, leaving a handful of dents in as many seconds, and they shrink back even further as you continue yelling at him- you can't stop yelling, otherwise you'll just start /bawling/.

(Cont.)

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>>40378263
Because you ARE a dwarf! you howl, backhanding his helmet so hard it turns halfway around his head. A knee to the breastplate stops him from getting back up. You drink ALCOHOL like fishes breathe WATER! You've got so many damn BUGS in you that if you were a honey bee colony, you'd be ready to split into another fucking hive! You've lost so many times that you're having more fun than anyone has any right to be having!

And he DARES to say you're not a DWARF!?

Far beyond caring about your throbbing hands and split knuckles, you pick yourself up and grapple your opponent, hauling him up by one ear and one of his upper back teeth, before slamming him against the wall again- you can almost hear the other dwarves wincing in sympathy.

You're doing the best you can! you roar, pulling your opponent back only to slam him again. You're doing the best you can to be a dwarf who doesn't have a beard! Because- because- all these fuckers, these hoity-toity dwarves, they all STOLE YOUR GODDAMN BEARD!

NOW you /literally/ hear the other dwarves wincing, sucking in scandalized breaths at your words, but you're beyond caring as you cock back a fist, this time aiming to drive the military dwarf's nose into his brain-

- only to be pulled back, as callused hands close around your wrists and gently guide you away from your opponent.

"Yer not a dwarf," another migrant repeats soothingly. "But maybe that wasn't the best way to put it."

"You ARE a dwarf, true as can be, aye. But you are not just one dwarf." The dwaves' voices begin blending together, gradually losing the accent that your kind holds so dearly to their hearts.

A tall, pointy-eared figure, a beard strapped to his chin and a dwarven warhammer strapped to his back, grins down at you. "You represent all of us. Stop flailing around like an elf and start bringing pride to our name."

"Every sentient being, every fortress ever made in your name, every universe spun out of code."

(Cont.)

HA! misunderstanding of the fuckin CENTURY

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>>40378305
A shadowy figure muscles into the group, revealing sharp teeth and a goddamned indescribable number of eyes and limbs- but even so, you can't feel any killing intent. "We are a part of you," the forgotten beast croons. "Do not fear us. Make use of us. Strike fear into the hearts of those who would oppose you."

... hell, you'd sure like that, but you can't feel your limbs anymore. The Arena begins fading around you, the edges of reality seeming to grow fuzzy and distant. For a few timeless moments, you free-fall through the void, but you don't feel scared- you don't really feel /anything/.

Another voice cuts in, high and clear and childlike, and a light dazzles your eyes- the dream-like fuzziness clears instantly, revealing a tiny fairy girl sitting in a book. She beams up at you.

"You are Dwarf Fortress," the fairy says solemnly. "Please do your best and survive in these trying times. I'll be rooting for you! Now you'd better wake up before you hit the water."

>SKILL SYSTEM abolished!
>CONTEXTUAL COMBAT ABILITIES unlocked!
>RELIABLE CREATURE SUMMONING unlocked!
>DWARF MINIONS (NOVICE) unlocked!
>EXE DRIVE 1 unlocked!

...

Motherfucker, you RECOGNIZE this fairy!!

[ ] [WAKE UP (CAVE-IN)] [+BONUS] Come back to the land of the living and bring a whole lot of dirt with you. You won't drown if you bring something to stand on, motherfucker!
[ ] [WAKE UP (SUMMON)] Wake up and immediately summon a creature to help keep you afloat. You've got no SHORTAGE of beasties that can make water their bitch!
[ ] [GRAB FAIRY] Hold on, you're not getting ejected just yet. You've got some questions for this- this thing! [ROLL REQUIRED]
[ ] [WRITE-IN]

>>40378305
C-Cacame...?

>>40378387
>[X] [WAKE UP (CAVE-IN)] [+BONUS] Come back to the land of the living and bring a whole lot of dirt with you. You won't drown if you bring something to stand on, motherfucker!

The solution to any problem is to either dig a hole in it or fill it with dirt.

>>40378387
>[x] [WAKE UP (SUMMON)] Wake up and immediately summon a creature to help keep you afloat. You've got no SHORTAGE of beasties that can make water their bitch!

>>40378387

>SKILL SYSTEM abolished!
>CONTEXTUAL COMBAT ABILITIES unlocked!
>RELIABLE CREATURE SUMMONING unlocked!
>DWARF MINIONS (NOVICE) unlocked!
>EXE DRIVE 1 unlocked!
blorp.... you're the most amazing bastard
>[ ] [WAKE UP (CAVE-IN)] [+BONUS] Come back to the land of the living and bring a whole lot of dirt with you. You won't drown if you bring something to stand on, motherfucker!
This seems like a very us thing to do

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>>40378387
>Motherfucker, you RECOGNIZE this fairy!!
Is it this one? Because if it is, murder the shit out of it.

>>40378453
Do not believe in her lies!

Rolled 10 (1d20)

>>40378387
>[ ] [WAKE UP (CAVE-IN)] [+BONUS] Come back to the land of the living and bring a whole lot of dirt with you. You won't drown if you bring something to stand on, motherfucker!

>>40378387
>[ ] [WAKE UP (CAVE-IN)] [+BONUS] Come back to the land of the living and bring a whole lot of dirt with you. You won't drown if you bring something to stand on, motherfucker!
>[ ] [WRITE-IN] I AM DWARF FORTRESS!

>You won't drown if you bring something to stand on, motherfucker!
still traveling/falling at unsafe speeds, just hitting the ground, even if it's nice loamy soil, doesn't sound fun. Is that bonus to a roll, or a secret bonus if we pick that option?

>>40378507
The bonus is to a roll, but terminal velocities etc. won't be a problem just this once!

>>40378387
>>EXE DRIVE 1 unlocked!

EXE. Tantrum Spiral!

>>40378387
>[ ] [WAKE UP (CAVE-IN)] [+BONUS] Come back to the land of the living and bring a whole lot of dirt with you. You won't drown if you bring something to stand on, motherfucker!

>revealing a tiny fairy girl sitting in a book.
Histiore, is that you?

>>40378561
most likely, I am however impressed as hell after reading cacames backstory, that is one badass elfdorf

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>>40378561
maybe

Anyway, looks like [CAVE-IN] is a go, so!

>Urist Twelfthbay wakes up!
ROLL d20! (dice+1d20 in the email field)
Taking the best of three!
DC: 15 (Bonus: +5 from terraforming practice!)

Rolled 19 (1d20)

>>40378609

Rolled 20 (1d20)

>>40378609
I smell it.

nat 1 incoming

Rolled 5 (1d20)

>>40378609

>>40378609
>>40378626
Lol nope.

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>>40378626
Well ain't this a rare sighting

>>40378626
Urist doesn't just pull her dirt with her, she pulls the goddamn fort she was building.

>>40378624
>>40378626
..well that worked
inb4 giant dirt fortress or statue

>>40378609
>>40378624
>>40378626

>Roll a 19
>Feel great did a good job
>Next mother fucker rolls a 20

Regardless nice job anon

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>>40378626
>low roll target
>add ludicrous bonuses
>20 anyway

WELP

.......... WELP

WRITING

>>40378626
From falling to calmly walking across a huge stone bridge in nothing flat.

>>40378659
>>40378664

You gotta do this Blorp

>>40378670
honestly you should expect this sorta shit by now, especially considering you run ogre civ quest.
The events of that series are fucking legendary.

>>40378694
Except this quest has had shitty rolls for pretty much the last half of the quest.

So of course we had to get a 19 and a 20 on a roll that was basically softlobbed at us.

>>40378714

This quest is known for being true dwarf fortress.

DC's are like 13/14/15 and we miss then 2/3 the time.

>>40378626
soooooo this giant fortress in the middle of the ocean is gonna be our new base of operations right?

>>40378730
we also crit succeed at the best of times

>>40378862

And crit fail at the worst of times. Like summoning.

>>40378408
Yeap.
Pity slol sluxlol didn't give us a few words of encouragement too.

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>>40378920
/FUN/ times

>Summon

Can we summon replacement (permanent) oxen for the Oregon Trail?

>>40379082
No we get carp instead

>>40378844
Oh absolutely, I think this part of the ocean TECHNICALLY isnt part of any nation, which means wee dont have to follow any building laws! we can start the megaproject!

>>40379156
Yessss. We can just have rokko shotgun ice the water below the dirt we're creating. We can smooth the resulting ice into unmeltable/unbreakable walls then continue digging down till we hit the sea bed. Then its gravy and circus clown funtimes from there.

>>40379156
>inb4 we build a refuge for traditionally pc games that just so happens to be steam powered

>>40379156
>>40379236
And I JUST found out about Canada's ice/sawdust island over in kant-o-celle quest.

This must be a sign.

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>>40378387
>[X] [WAKE UP (CAVE-IN)]
>20
>WELL OKAY THEN

That fairy! You /swear/ that your first memory, right before waking up in the goddamn Gamindustri Graveyard, was this motherfucking fairy talking to you! Even before you finish that thought, you feel like you're on the verge of something AMAZINGLY important, and you reach out to the book fairy-

- who smiles beatifically at you, kicking her legs slightly. "We'll speak again, Dwarf Fortress. I'm sure of it. But your time is-"

And then the real world snaps into focus around you, the rainbow bridge dwindling into the sky and the wind tousling your hair- no, it's all /streaming past you/ as gravity hurtles you toward the ocean, including bits and pieces from the ill-fated mini-megaproject wagon. And going by your particular brand of physics, a fall from this height into the water won't necessarily break you, but it'll knock you unconscious, and even if you were a legendary swimmer that'd still cause you to drown, because you're just a mortal dwarf-

Hahaha well, no, fuck THAT, you are Dwarf Motherfucking Fortress. You laugh deliriously, not caring that it comes out as a clear high-pitched giggle rather than your usual dour growl, and curl your hands into white-knuckled fists- just like in DF Arena, /something/ gives way, and it's probably reality itself. Right here, right now, you're over the ocean, smack-dab between two nations that don't have sovereignty over international waters. Their powers and their shares and all their hoity-toity divinity bullshit don't extend this far out.

Where you previously drew upon yourself and your own limited well of chutzpah, you now draw in power from Gamindustri itself and filter it out through the little shred of batshit insanity that is you, yourself, and Dwarf Fortress.

"CREATING NEW REGION," you roar, thrusting a hand out into the rapidly-approaching ocean.

(Cont.)

inb4 summons a carp minion and/or summons a full fortress. Right on Leanbox's doorstep.

>Carp loose in Leanbox
Oh God what am I saying

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>>40379527
Even as the waters below are just starting to churn, you /feel/ your influence spiking into the earth beneath, a thin pillar of sheer creative force changing the world from Gamindustri's core all the way up to its surface: a magma sea churns into place, deeply-buried rock cracks and rearranges itself to reveal yawning caverns and chasms. In this little slice of the world, this pocket island, everything from the ores to the vegetation to the very fabric of life all come under your control, and it feels absolutely fucking amazing-

You hear shouts from above as Rokko and the Shovel Knight finally cotton onto the fact that you're falling, which only increase in volume as an island rises up beneath you, a solid tidal wave of soil roaring well above the ocean waves before settling into a picturesque little spot of green against blue. Just this once, gravity gently loosens its hold on you, and you touch down almost gently; the moment your boots settle against the grasslands, tiny dwarven fortresses sprout like fast-growing flowers, a full-fledged civilization.

"Tadinomon. The Enchanted Realms," you whisper to yourself; you hold one hand out, settling your palm against the hillock of your beginner's fortress. You don't even have to look inside to confirm that it's the same one as you'd created in DF Arena.

Moments later, Rokko's the first one down- she all but vaults off her Rush Jet, staggering over to you (and incidentally causing a few goblin dark fortresses to lose a quarter of their populations). "Q-Query, you are. Unharmed?" she stammers, and it's more than her usual vocal malfunctions that are making her stutter.

You're beyond caring about your ~gruff dwarven image~- you plant your hands on your hips and give her a big toothy grin, beaming as wide as you can. Unharmed? Hah! You've never felt better!

(Cont.)

>CREATING NEW REGION
herewego.jpg

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>>40379527
>"CREATING NEW REGION,"

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>>40379553
Maybe it's wishful thinking, but Rokko seems to sag with relief (although it could well be exhaustion, given all the shit you've put her through). "Understood. I-I'm glad. And this, i-island-" The Blue Bomber trails off, looking down at you quizzically.

This is your power! This is what you're really fucking capable of! You've finally become THE Dwarf Fortress! You can build whatever the hell you want, and NOBODY can stop you!

... you catch yourself before you begin cackling, and cough into a fist. R-Right. So, uh, Rokko's okay, right? And the Shovel Knight-

"W-Well within operational parameters," Rokko confirms. "The S-Shovel Knight is holding off our guide-"

(Cont.)

Oh god, what happened to Oregon Trail. She's not going to break our island like a bridge, is she?

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>>40379572
You can SEE the moment she senses whatever it is that's about to happen- the Blue Bomber's pupils contract to pinpricks, and she whirls around to face the island nation of Leanbox that looms large in the middle distance. Like a dark parody of what you'd just done, even YOU can feel the power coalescing above Leanbox, turning the sky a sickly dark tropical storm-green- but more worrisome is the gigantic ring that snaps into existence above Leanbox's island, looking ludicrously like an angel's halo to scale.

You barely have a moment to stare before the ring turns blood-red, and from the highest point above Leanbox, some sort of glowing purple energy begins cascading down, beginning the inexorable process of covering the island nation in a dome.

"U-Urist," Rokko all but growls, her electronic voice carrying a hint of urgency. "We must go in. Now. Before she c-closes off Leanbox."

You don't even have time to /ask/ what the Blue Bomber means by "she." Everyone you know is in Leanbox, and if you wanna make sure they're not gonna get stuck in there alone-

Rokko is still staring up into the sky- the way her pupils are contracting, you can't help but wonder if she's got binoculars built-in- and eventually, she points. "There. At the top, above the halo. CPU Green Heart."

[ ] [ENTER LEANBOX] As reluctant as you are to leave your fledgling island fortress behind, Estelle and everyone else is in there. You've got to go in before you're shut out- and besides, you'll be able to access your island from DF Arena!
[ ] [TUNNEL INTO LEANBOX] You want to get in, but you want to be able to leave on your own terms. Dig a tunnel leading from your fortress, under the ocean, and into Leanbox- how WON'T that come into handy later?
[ ] [CONFRONT CPU GREEN HEART] Take Rokko and the Shovel Knight, and fly up to confront CPU Green Heart. Try to convince her NOT to isolate Leanbox and lock all your friends inside (and you outside). Why not be as direct as possible?
[ ] [WRITE-IN]

>>40379590
>[ ] [TUNNEL INTO LEANBOX] You want to get in, but you want to be able to leave on your own terms. Dig a tunnel leading from your fortress, under the ocean, and into Leanbox- how WON'T that come into handy later?

>>40379590
>[ ] [TUNNEL INTO LEANBOX] You want to get in, but you want to be able to leave on your own terms. Dig a tunnel leading from your fortress, under the ocean, and into Leanbox- how WON'T that come into handy later?

FUCK ALL OF THEM AND THEIR SHIT!

>>40379590
>[ ] [TUNNEL INTO LEANBOX] You want to get in, but you want to be able to leave on your own terms. Dig a tunnel leading from your fortress, under the ocean, and into Leanbox- how WON'T that come into handy later?

Can always smuggle shit in too. Good thing there is humble bundle, gog games and also steam is now picking up old classics.

>WRITE-IN - Summon a Flying Megabeast and get your arse into Leanbox, then make the Megabeast attack CPU Green Heart.

At least it'll let us know Vert's power. Maybe more if we get lucky and she's ranting or something and we can listen in.

>>40379590
>[x] [TUNNEL INTO LEANBOX] You want to get in, but you want to be able to leave on your own terms. Dig a tunnel leading from your fortress, under the ocean, and into Leanbox- how WON'T that come into handy later?
We can always perform an uncontrolled collapse if the tunnel becomes a problem later.

>>40379590
>[ ] [ENTER LEANBOX] As reluctant as you are to leave your fledgling island fortress behind, Estelle and everyone else is in there. You've got to go in before you're shut out- and besides, you'll be able to access your island from DF Arena!

Hey Blorp how is the opening gonna change to show Urist changing from dorf to dorffortress?

>>40379590
>[ ] [TUNNEL INTO LEANBOX] You want to get in, but you want to be able to leave on your own terms. Dig a tunnel leading from your fortress, under the ocean, and into Leanbox- how WON'T that come into handy later?

>>40379590
>[X] [TUNNEL INTO LEANBOX] You want to get in, but you want to be able to leave on your own terms. Dig a tunnel leading from your fortress, under the ocean, and into Leanbox- how WON'T that come into handy later?
Dig! Dig deep!

>>40379627
HERE COMES THE DWARF FORTRESS VPN TOOT TOOT MOTHERFUCKER

Hey can we have elf, human, monster, and other assorted things as minions as well?

I want a Roc

>>40379814
We have a Rock already.

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>>40379855

Damn, how about Oregon?

[X] [ENTER LEANBOX]

>>40379677
We'll have to see next time!

>>40379814
At this point in time, they'll still be summons, especially in Fortress Mode! However, to have non-dwarves as minions will be a pretty advanced upgrade, so Urist would have to do some more spelunking before that happens.

Rocs are entirely possible for dwarves to have as tameable pets, though, so-

>>40379855
DAMMIT, CARLOS

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>>40379590
ALRIGHT, it's getting a little late, so I'm gonna call the thread here!

I'm gonna try to hold another thread TOMORROW- Thursday, 6/4- at 9-ish pm EST! As usual, updates will be at https://twitter.com/BlorpQuest, and questions can go to ask.fm/BlorpQuest.

Thanks for participating, guys, and hope to catch you next time!
BUT WAIT, THERE'S MORE- I'm not quite done with the bonus Mojang+Urist continuation scene yet, but here's a short preview.

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You are Mojang, the moe personification of Minecraft! Much to your relief, your immediate future does not involve getting brutally torn apart, nor will your component parts be occupying anyone’s soup pot.

Okay, so those aren’t exactly normal things to worry about, but you wouldn’t know anything about normality. You were literally born yesterday! Even then, you’re smart enough to worry about getting killed and eaten, or at least ravished a little, when the wild-looking little girl forcefully dragged you back to her “home” (literally a hole in the ground) to heal your self-inflicted wounds that came from punching a tree into logs (like any normal person would do). But true to her word, she healed you right up, scrubbing out your knuckles with soap and cleaning them off with water before wrapping it all up with silky bandages.

“Urist Twelfthbay completes task,” she says to herself as she puts away her tools, sounding pretty pleased. The girl- Urist?- doesn’t even look back over her shoulder at you. “Diagnostician skill increased. Wound-dressing skill increased.”

You take this time to look around your savior’s home. There’s not much to see: it’s a hole in the dirt, with a ramp leading down from the surface for an entrance, and one wooden door blocking off whatever there is to block from the outside. But it’s really surprisingly roomy! There are exactly seven beds, also made of wood, and a few side rooms that you can’t quite identify, with workstations strewn haphazardly through the underground area. It’s lived-in, but looking back, it’s hard to say whether Urist was truly /living/ in this place.

Still, it’s the first home you’ve ever seen. To your inexperienced eyes, it’s absolutely amazing, and you’re like a small child in a candy shop.

(Cont.)

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>>40380025
“Urist, Urist,” you chirrup, getting off the bed and padding over to a wooden bin; you poke through all the strange implements, objects too advanced for your mind to properly quantify, and you waste no time bugging your host. “What’re these?”

“Weapons. Tools,” the smaller girl grunts tolerantly, stowing her things in a separate bin before moving over to a cage.

“Urist, Urist,” you chirrup, walking over to some furrowed dirt- there’re small plants growing up and out, far different from the strange spongy green grasses up on the surface! “What’re these?”

“Plants. Farmed food,” Urist grumbles, pulling something out of a cage and meandering over to one of the workbenches. You pad on over and stare at the squirming creature in the smaller girl’s lap- the cutest little thing you’ve ever seen in your short life blinks back up at you, a cute little furred feline with big cute eyes and a cute little pink nose and cute little pointed fluffy ears and it lets out a cute little “mew!” that makes you feel warm and fuzzy inside.

“Urist! Urist!” you squeal, clasping your hands against your cheeks as you keep your eyes trained on the first kitten you’ve ever seen in your life. “What’s that??”

Urist gently puts the kitten on the workbench and picks up a bloody carving knife. “Dinner,” she grumbles, bringing down the knife and rendering the adorable and unsuspecting kitten into an inert pile of prepared meats and organs and bones and hss, hssssss, SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS-

-to be continued tomorrow-

> Kitten
> Bloody Carving Knife
> HSSSSS

> LMAOS

>>40380036
Kittens gives a very few meat and skin. Better to leave them grow a little into full blown cats.

Blorp, are we gong to get to see any ascended? I do want to see the Chief in action. Even against us, with the hyper acceleration glitch,

>>40380000
Damn you, Blorp! Damn you, magnificent bastard! marry me

>>40380036
hahahahahahaha

Can't wait till tomorrow!

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>>40378305
>You've lost so many times that you're having more fun than anyone has any right to be having!

Didn't make it in time for this or the last thread, but I'm glad to have you back and running Blorp

Didn't make it in time, buck welcome back blorp!
Also, turns out you don't have to leave workers outside to build a fortified pillbox with sealed roofs;
You build a hollow 5x5 wall, but with one tile that isn't a corner as a ramp. After that, you build a 3x3 floor as the roof. And deconstruct the ranp to fill it in as a wall. Done!

Haha. Here comes the boom.

>>40380036
>Urist gently puts the kitten on the workbench and picks up a bloody carving knife. “Dinner,” she grumbles, bringing down the knife and rendering the adorable and unsuspecting kitten into an inert pile of prepared meats and organs and bones and hss, hssssss, SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS-
Oh boooy