“Huh,” I grunt as I glance through one of the doors leading into the warehouse. Place had changed a lot since I was there last. Lot more shell casings and dead bodies lying around compared to a few days ago. Also someone had gone to the trouble of adding a botanical garden.

Vines, some of them as thick as my torso, cover the back half of the warehouse, looking like someone had transplanted a jungle to Saintsburgh shipping district. Which is basically what happened. An elf is standing in the middle of the wilds, cackling with laughter as giant humanoid constructs of wood and vine close in on the EnRA strike team, currently pinned behind concrete pillars in the middle of the room.

Things could be going better. I mean, they could also be going substantially worse, TK15 could have had a dragon on hand or maybe we could have all realized the futility of life or maybe there could have been a giant meteor headed to obliterate all of us. Still, in terms of things that existed within the realm of possibility, things looked a little for the intrepid agents of EnRA.

Which of course is why they called on us for help. I turn back around to address the assembled Associates from LL. They were, to a man, bearing SMGs similar to my own, and they all had one spare clip of cold iron FMJs. While effective against fae, I had the sneaking suspicion that the swamp things converging on the embattled agents were less fae and more magical constructs. Which calls for ferrocores. Or geeking the mage. Whichever is easier I suppose.

The Associates are all watching me, waiting my instructions.

>Focus fire on the Jolly Green Giants. Try to slow them down so the G-men can reposition.
>Focus fire on the mage and whoever else might be back there with him.
>>Also, what is your personal plan of attack?

Jason Reinhardt Status

Hit Points: 28/28
Limb Status: All good
Concussion Status: All good
Aether Points: 20/20
Weapon: SMG
Secondary Weapons: Baseball Bat, Mitten Knitted With Love

Powers:
>Homerun (2 AeP): Force rune printed on baseball bat. May activate during attack to deal double damage.
>Mother’s Love (Passive): All attacks with Mittens deal x4 Damage to spirits and magical constructs ex: golems, ghosts, demons
>Cold Iron FMJ: Two magazines of bullets designed to kill fae. Receive a 2x damage multiplier against fae and prevent regeneration
>Ferrocore: One magazine of bullets with a magnetic iron core. 2x damage against spirits and magical constructs, unhindered by protective spells.

>>39695099
"This is why you have to be diligent about weeding your gardens, the moment you aren't looking everything gets overrun and then you might as well start all over again."

Put a couple rounds of ferrocore into the constructs before shooting at the mages. Spend no more than half the mag in total.

>>39695099
>>Focus fire on the mage and whoever else might be back there with him.
Gank squishy wizard.
>>Also, what is your personal plan of attack?
The baseball bat or gloves would require dashing past The Vegetable Hulk. Have our crack shots load Cold Iron and aim for the mage, everyone else loads Ferrocores and enjoys the target-rich environment.

>>39695099
>>Focus fire on the mage and whoever else might be back there with him.
use

>>Cold Iron FMJ: Two magazines of bullets designed to kill fae. Receive a 2x damage multiplier against fae and prevent regeneration

File: Does-This-Look-Like-the-F(...).jpg (134 KB, 412x557)

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We didn't bring Ma's knit ski mask?

Alright, so I think people want to have the Associates fire on the mage and dealers in the back, while Reinhardt uses ferrocores on the plant monsters?

I think maybe 3 rolls of 3d10

Rolled 8, 8, 8 = 24 (3d10)

>>39695553

Rolled 3, 3, 7 = 13 (3d10)

>>39695553
Rolling

Rolled 7, 6, 10 = 23 (3d10)

>>39695553

>>39695560
Khorn Demands blood!

Sorry about the delay everybody, I lost connection to google docs for a good thirty minutes. Just got back in.

If I my connection fucks up again I might call it for today, but for now writing and should hopefully have a post ready soon.

> Amber's side is archived under Goddamnit Danzing
Yes I'm slow, but kek.

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>>39695973
Switch to Writer.bighugelabs.com, it's what I used after GDocs royally screwed me over.

“Alright,” I snarl, gesturing at the assembled gangsters, “Those big green bastards are probably immune or resistant to normal rounds. Might not be to the FMJs though. Open fire on them initially, and if they aren’t slowed down by a burst or two, switch to the mage in the back.”

The Associates all nod as one. A half second of tense waiting, then I lead the charge into the warehouse, which is less a charge and more like a few steps through the door. The agents are keeping good cover fire on the mage and remaining dealers in the back, giving us time to move into position. The Associates assemble into a rough crescent moon, with me and Brutus in the center. I shout a warning to the agents before signalling for the Associates to open fire.

SMGs may only fire pistol rounds, but you get enough of them together and shooting at once and it can be pretty goddamn loud. The line of gangsters explodes with muzzles flashes and a sound that was the louder and angrier cousin of ripping paper. The FMJs easily punch through the plant monsters, and I can see small explosions of splinters and dust where they strike wood.

The plant monsters seem completely unimpressed by the whole display and continue to move forward at their default plod. I grimace, switching over to a mag of ferrocores while the rest of the line changes targets to the people huddled in the back.

Fumbling momentarily, I slam the mag home into the gun and designate a new target, the plant monster nearest the huddled EnRA agents. I join the chorus of gunfire, sending a quick burst of three rounds slamming home into the pla- okay plant monster is a terrible name. Let’s call them… oh floraformis. That sounds nice and latin-y. So anyway, I send a quick burst of rounds into the floraformis nearest the huddled agents. Unlike my compatriots’ bullets, these don’t simply pass through the floraformis. The little bullets strike like I had fired shotgun slugs instead, obliterating the head of the floraformis in an explosion of plant matter and juice. The creature slumps over, and my next salvo, fired a little too excitedly, whooshes overhead.

I frown and fire again on another floraformis, this time aiming for the center of mass. The organic golem’s chest collapses in on itself as the magnetic field of the round erases the animating magical field. I chuckle darkly, and sweep my eyes over the room. The EnRA agents seem to have brought their own mags of ferrocores, and are moving to change megs. Except for the G-woman I met with in the garage, who apparently already had ferrocores in and is firing on the nearest floraformis.

A triumphant smirk that threatened to break out across my face dies a premature death as a conglomeration of vines as thick as a telephone pole smashes into one of the concrete pillars, exploding it into dust and sending agents flying across the room. Eyes bulging, I look around to see the mage, standing up surrounded by a field of thick, wiggling vines, the green tendrils lashing up to intercept bullets.

>Instructions to Associates?
>Personal plan of attack

Jason Reinhardt Status

Hit Points: 28/28
Limb Status: All good
Concussion Status: All good
Aether Points: 20/20
Weapon: SMG | 21/30
Secondary Weapons: Baseball Bat, Mitten Knitted With Love

Powers:
>Homerun (2 AeP): Force rune printed on baseball bat. May activate during attack to deal double damage.
>Mother’s Love (Passive): All attacks with Mittens deal x4 Damage to spirits and magical constructs ex: golems, ghosts, demons
>Cold Iron FMJ: Two magazines of bullets designed to kill fae. Receive a 2x damage multiplier against fae and prevent regeneration
>Ferrocore: One magazine of bullets with a magnetic iron core. 2x damage against spirits and magical constructs, unhindered by protective spells.

>>39696514
Homerun the shit out of that pencil pushing drug sniffing fae bastard

>>39696514
>>Instructions to Associates?
Use the ferrocores, go geek that mage personally

>>39696535
Have our Associates take care of remaining floraforms, and cover our approach.

We charge at the mage, use Homerun to knock aside a vine thrust if necessary, get in close and paste them.

Okay, close with mage, using homerun to deflect any sort of vine attack if necessary?

I think 3 rolls of 3d10

>Close with mage
>Counter vine attack
>Attack mage

Rolled 4, 2, 4 = 10 (3d10)

>>39696689

Rolled 7, 4, 6 = 17 (3d10)

>>39696689

Rolled 10, 6, 6 = 22 (3d10)

>>39696689

>>39696724
>>39696763
>>39696787
>take one step forward
>vines
>whydontIjustshoothimfromhere

>>39696867
Because standing back and shooting is boring anon.

>>39696867
>>39696937
Also, don't forget the delicious vines slowly creeping up Reinhart's leg, progressively getting closer to his firm but- oh fuck, what is wrong with me?

File: lewdness disease.png (5 KB, 105x150)

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>>39696958

“Suppressing fire on the floraformices,” I bark out the the Associates. “And watch your fire! I’m going to close with the mage.”

I don’t wait to hear the Associates’ reply, holstering my SMG as I bolt forward, free hand reaching for the bat. The floor is covered in bodies and vines, making the terrain trickier than it has any right to be. I feel my foot strike something. From the feel of it, probably a body. I may spend a little too much time kicking the shit out of people. I stumble forward, trying to regain my balance first, my momentum second.

I barely manage to notice the floraformis’ sledgehammer like fist before it strikes. Luckily though, years of hitting things much larger than myself has honed my instincts for large fists. Although certainly not approved for the majors, I swing my bat in an awkward uppercut, force rune glowing brilliantly, and connect with the forearm and elbow of the floraformis.

The wood that makes up the golem’s forearm doesn’t snap. Instead, for the briefest of instants, it bulges with the seismic energy from the strike before exploding into a shower of splinters and sawdust. The rest of the arm fares little better, the vines of the upper arm blasted apart from the once cohesive whole, flapping around a little tragically. The floraformis remains stoically silent in the face of the grievous injury, but falls back a few steps. I snarl, swinging the bat into a regular grip, and backstep quickly behind a pillar.

I glance around. The EnRA agents have fallen back, away from the vines, firing in controlled bursts to cover their retreat. Their ferrocores devastate the floraformices, leaving massive craters in the golem’s bodies as vines, no longer bound into a cohesive shape, sag and fall into dissarray. However, even as I watch, the vines reform. Whoever this mage is, he’s got a lot of power.

Cursing, I turn to see what can only be the G-woman crouched near me, clutching her assault rifle. She’s staring at my bat, apparently transfixed by the glowing rune.

>Ignore agent, plan attack
>Tell agent to snap out of it and help you.
>>How should she help you?
>Write in

Jason Reinhardt Status

Hit Points: 28/28
Limb Status: All good
Concussion Status: All good
Aether Points: 18/20
Weapon: Baseball Bat
Secondary Weapons: Mittens Knitted With Love, SMG | 21/30

Powers:
>Homerun (2 AeP): Force rune printed on baseball bat. May activate during attack to deal double damage.
>Mother’s Love (Passive): All attacks with Mittens deal x4 Damage to spirits and magical constructs ex: golems, ghosts, demons
>Cold Iron FMJ: Two magazines of bullets designed to kill fae. Receive a 2x damage multiplier against fae and prevent regeneration
>Ferrocore: One magazine of bullets with a magnetic iron core. 2x damage against spirits and magical constructs, unhindered by protective spells.

>>39697177
>>Tell agent to snap out of it and help you.
Covering fire! Need to get to the mage!

>>39696958
> vine on thug action
Oh my~
> nosebleed.exe

>>39697177
>Tell agent to snap out of it and help you.
>>How should she help you?

Go one way and provide covering fire, draw the mages attention, fill him with lead if possible.

We go the other way and paste the fucker with our bat. If anything gets in our way Bat and/or Mitten our way through the constructs.

>>39697177
>She’s staring at my bat, apparently transfixed by the glowing rune.
well, that didn't take long.

>>39697177
>get her to shoot at the mage
>we charge mittens first, drawing the vines' attention

Alright. So have the agent provide covering fire, attempt to close with mage again and attack, using mittens to hold off vines?

Gimme 4 rolls 3d10

Rolled 4, 3, 7 = 14 (3d10)

>>39697362

Rolled 2, 3, 4 = 9 (3d10)

>>39697362

Rolled 2, 5, 6 = 13 (3d10)

>>39697362
FOR THE BUTTS!

Rolled 8, 5, 7 = 20 (3d10)

>>39697362
>>39697362
FOR THOR.

Rolled 8, 2, 3 = 13 (3d10)

>>39697362

“Listen, I get the lights are pretty,” I say, voice strained, “but I’m gonna need some help if I’m gonna geek the mage.”

The agent shakes herself. “Right, of course. I’ll provide covering fire, you focus on closing with the mage.”

“Excellent,” I grunt, pulling one of Ma’s mittens onto my left hand. “Keep the vines off of me.”

I don’t wait for the agent’s reply, instead bursting out into the open once more. The ferrocores from the agents seem to have at least kept most of the floraformices down and the mage in the back distracted with regenerating them. I manage to close a considerable distance between myself and the mage. Not close enough, however. About fifteen feet away, the mage notices me, spinning around with a vicious sneer on his face. The mage is an elf, taller than usual, maybe six feet or so. His long greenish hair is bound back into a ponytail, face covered in celtic looking tattoos. There’s a smear of pink on his upper lip.

Oh goodie.

The mage raises a hand a shouts out a word in a flowing language I don’t recognize and can’t quite hear over the din of gunfire. The vines at my feet however, apparently can hear him perfectly clearly and they surge up, attempting to wrap themselves around my calves and ankles. I snarl and try to jerk my feet clear. Unfortunately, a blunt instrument like pretty much my entire arsenal isn’t so good when dealing with hostile underbrush. Swearing sulphurously, I continue to wade toward the wild eyed elf through the sea of clinging vines, the floral tentacles not quite enough to keep me in place.

The mage snarls at my forward progress, teeth bared like some sort of feral animal. “Impudent plains monkey! Your place is at the dirt, kissing my feet. I shall take all necessary measures to impart this lesson unto you.”

The vine he swings at me is girthy. About the same size as the cables on a suspension bridge. My bat only manages to partially deflect the titanic vine, forcing it to whip into my side instead of my head. The blow is tremendous, easily lifting me into the air despite the vines clinging to my legs.

I don’t travel that far, landing onto a cushion of vine and corpses. I sit up, one hand holding my side as the other paws around for the bat. I don’t think anything’s broken, but with all this adrenaline rushing, it’s hard to tell. Another vine rises up, this one tapering into a narrow point. Jesus, he wants to spear me.

before I even have a chance to roll out of the way, the vine spear explodes apart as the G-lady opens fire, ferrocores blasting the spear apart. The druid screams furiously. “Common human slattern! Do not interrupt the great Allaradwynn while he works the primal forces of the universe!”

Jesus. Who refers to themselves in third person these days? I suppose it’s marginally better than the royal “we” but something about it still grates with unwarranted self importance.

Spitting an oath, I stand up once more, holding my bat. If a rib is broken, I can wait to find out.

The G-lady is doing a brilliant job distracting the mad elf, who has completely forgotten about me and instead started going about with punishing the agent for her impudence. Sneering, I break into a loping sprint, bounding over thick vines.

>Geek the mage.
>And by that, I mean write in some brutal shit and we’ll roll for it for shits and giggles.

Jason Reinhardt Status

Hit Points: 20/28
Limb Status: All good
Concussion Status: All good
Aether Points: 18/20
Weapon: Baseball Bat
Secondary Weapons: Mittens Knitted With Love, SMG | 21/30

Powers:
>Homerun (2 AeP): Force rune printed on baseball bat. May activate during attack to deal double damage.
>Mother’s Love (Passive): All attacks with Mittens deal x4 Damage to spirits and magical constructs ex: golems, ghosts, demons
>Cold Iron FMJ: Two magazines of bullets designed to kill fae. Receive a 2x damage multiplier against fae and prevent regeneration
>Ferrocore: One magazine of bullets with a magnetic iron core. 2x damage against spirits and magical constructs, unhindered by protective spells.

>>39698052
>>Geek the mage.
Point of bat to gut, Then swing upwards into nutsack. Then as he's crying out to his pansy ass gods, homerun to the brain pan.

>>39698052
Activate homerun.
Bat meet skull, brain meet floor.

>>39698052
>Homerun the skull
>Three times

>>39698052
>Geek the mage.
Smash the fucker in the nuts, then swing up with the bat to the head, then end with two or three to the gut.

>>39698052
Smash one of his kneecaps into powder, knock him on his back, Homerun him in the chest, see if we can make his ribcage literally explode.

>>39698052
>Homerun his arm off
>Unload the SMG into the stump
>Regular bat time

Roll for shits and gigs.

Rolled 3, 6, 10 = 19 (3d10)

>>39698409

Rolled 9, 8, 5 = 22 (3d10)

>>39698409

Rolled 8, 2, 7 = 17 (3d10)

>>39698409
Rolland

Rolled 7, 8, 6 = 21 (3d10)

>>39698409
Here we go

File: Who in their right mind w(...).jpg (61 KB, 380x304)

61 KB JPG

>>39698428
>>39698437
>>39698443
>>39698449
>Mage status: Fucking Geeked.

I bound over the last few vines. Usually for this sort of thing I’d be swinging it in a slow circle, but frankly what with the uneven footing and running, I’d just prefer not to risk it. Allaradwynn the druid is facing away from me, ordering vines after the G-lady, who is doing an impressive job evading his attacks. Still, might as well lend her a hand.

I start to swing the bat in a slow circle. “Hey, Al.”

The elf spins around, eyes practically glowing with excess aether. Before he can speak a word, my hand closes tightly around the bat, and I send it nutward, force rune glowing like a beacon.

The bat judders in my hand as I make contact, the rune amplifying my already ample strength with a pulse of aether. There’s a dull thud, followed by a sickening crushing sound as Allaradwynn’s pelvis less shatters and more liquefies. The elf doesn’t even get a chance to voice his pain, the force of the blow bouncing him up into the air.

I take a few steps back as Allaradwynn lands on the ground in a heap, his legs flailing uselessly without a pelvis to anchor them. I circle around the crippled druid, gently twirling the bat in my hand as I do, force rune growing ever more bright as the bat whirls through the air.

Suddenly I halt the rotation of the bat, hand tightening on the metal stick, my elbow pointed at the ceiling.

“I had something for this,” I hiss triumphantly.

The bat hurtles down like the fist of God, air thrumming with seismic power.

“Stop!”

The bat stops. I spin around, eyes narrowed to see the G-lady staring at me, gun pointing at me.

>”Get that fucking thing out of my face.”
>”Why?”
>”No.” Proceed with smashing
>Write in

>>39698842
>"Why?"
>Unload into his face, she didn't ban that did she?

>>39698842
and this was completely expected when you go overboard on the Homerun
>"Fine." Doubletap the head and heart with the SMG.

>>39698842
>>”Why?”
Shoot him.

>>39698842
>”No.” Proceed with smashing

>>39698842
"Lady, if you want the crackhead alive, there's better ways to ask then that."

>>39698948
Forgot to add

>Proceed with smashing

>>39698842
>>”Get that fucking thing out of my face.”
Now, lets finish that elf, it's a mercy kill at this point.

My eyes narrow. I don’t like it when people throw me when I’m on a roll. “Why?”

“Because if you kill him, the trail goes cold fucktard,” snarls the G-lady, gun still pointed at me. “You can’t solve all your problems with that magic bat, you fucking psychopath!”

I sneer at her. “Hurtful words,” I chide, “you don’t even know me.”

“I saw what you did in Witten Park,” hisses the G-lady. “Hand over the elf, or I will fill you with lead. And I don’t miss.”

I’m about to laugh when I notice something weird about the eyes glaring out at me from her gas mask. They’ve got cat’s pupils. What the fuck? I stare coldly back at the G-lady from behind my own mask.

>”Fine, take the damn elf. We’re done here.”
>”Should’ve said please.” Kill Allaradwynn
>”The elf is coming with us. TK15 attacked us. We’ll figure out what’s going on here.”
>Write in

>>39699290
>>”Fine, take the damn elf. We’re done here.”
Also Might want to get your eyes checked crazy cat lady.

>>39699290
>>”Fine, take the damn elf. We’re done here.”
Look, no use getting in a dick waiving contest with these spoilsports.

We have more shit to do.

Also, Reinhart should introduce himself as "Magical PsychoThug Reinhart and his friend RuneBat".

>>39699290
>"The shmucks dumb enough to take these drugs don't know anything useful. Besides, elfy here is already about to explode from magical overdose."

>>39699290
>>39699373
Backing

>>39699290
>”Fine, take the damn elf. We’re done here.”

But not before smashing in one of his shoulders out of spite.

>>39699290
>>Write in
Then we're interrogating him in neutral territory, kid.

>>39699373
You do realize that overdoses make them eventually explode, right?

>>39699441
that's what I'm implying, yes.

>>39699373
Yep, supporting.

>>39699469
Sorry, meant to have quotation marks to indicate dialogue.

>>39699495
so....are you supporting?

>>39699290
>”Should’ve said please.” Kill Allaradwynn

>>39699521
Pretty much, yeah.

I shouldn't drink and quest, it's fucking up my posts.

>>39699290
This
>>39699373
and
>>”Should’ve said please.” Kill Allaradwynn

>>39699290
>And I don’t miss
I just realized how hilarious that is.

>>39699290
> And I don’t miss
Can we just stare at the ceiling for a moment before answering?

>>39699679
>>39699654
Calling her bluff would be meta knowledge anon! For shame.

>>39699714
Would it really? Not looking at the ceiling but calling it in general?

>>39699714
I'm just having a meta-laugh.

I blink at the G-lady slowly, eyes shifting between the gun and her own bizarre pupils. After a few seconds of thought I decide that it’s better to avoid antagonizing someone with an assault rifle trained on me.

“Fine, take the damn elf. We’re done here.”

I slide the bat back into it’s sling and stride away from the G-lady, who seems to be a more than a little surprised by my easy acquiescence. She spins around. “Wait, really? That easily?”

I glance back at her over my shoulder and shrug. “I doubt any of the schmucks dumb enough to take Pix know anything.”

The G-lady stares at you. “... Uh alright.”

“Besides, elfy here is about to explode from a magical overdose.”

“What?”

I merely turn back around and walk away, waving back at the G-lady. “Yup. Later.”

I walk through the warehouse, past bullet riddled corpses and piles of vines and wood that were once floraformices. The G-men are picking up a few injured comrades. I walk past them and out into the cool night air.

The Associates are standing in a loose ring. We’re short a few. I glance over at Brutus. “How many casualties?”

“Two, Enforcer,” rumbles the ogre. “One was hit by the vines. One of the plant things got the other. We’re looking at a lot of broken bones for both. Nothing immediately fatal that I can see though.”

I nod, and wince suddenly, gripping my side. The adrenaline is ebbing and by God, does my side hurt. I inhale sharply through my teeth, hissing in pain. Brutus moves next to me. “Enforcer? You’re injured. We need to take you to the Nursery.”

>Respond?

>>39699765
I figured

>>39699746
Mostly just this time since Reinhardt wasn't present for Jensen's stellar marshmanship

>>39699766
>Yeah, sure

>That G-lady over there, she ain't normal. Is she a mage or something?

>>39699766
Please.

Don't let the scary lady doctor treat me.

>>39699766
First, get me to my apartment. I need to look good for tonight.

>>39699766
>Respond?

Well, let's not keep our cougar waiting! Chop Chop!

>>39699766
"Yeah, think I'm presentable for the Madam? I think she might be rougher than those vines were."

>>39699879
Make that in shape and I'd agree. She wants the d.

>>39699766
oh, crap
>"na, I'm fine. Just a bruise"

File: 1366673871541.gif (1.73 MB, 151x136)

1.73 MB GIF

>>39699766
Fistbump the ogre.

>>39699766
"I'm fine, one of those vines just got a solid hit in. Nothing to worry about."

nope nope nope

File: 1399041987915.png (495 KB, 800x1030)

495 KB PNG

>>39700486
Stop trying to avoid our destiny of MILFy goodness.

It's as if you don't like leftover Christmas Cake.

“Shit. Looks like the Madame Doctor gets her side of the bargain anyway.”

Brutus merely cocks an eyebrow at me. I can’t actually see it because of the gas mask, but I can tell he has. “What side of the bargain?”

“Nothing,” I sigh. “You think I’m in shape for the doctor? She’ll probably be rougher than the vines were.”

Brutus merely snorts and shakes his head. “C’mon Enforcer, lemme give you a hand.”

I accept the shoulder gratefully and Brutus guides me into the car headed back the the Nursery. Two other associates are in there, both with bones sticking out. Gross. One of them is still conscious, and he nods weakly in my direction. I nod back, trying not to grimace.

Seriously, bones should not stick out like that. He could put someone’s eye out with that thing.

The ride to the Nursery seems to be a lot longer than it actually is. Probably the weird mixture of dread and anticipation. Maybe I could tell the Madame Doctor that I’m just seeing the wounded off? I’m sure Dr. Cygne would be more than capable of handling a few broken ribs. I shift around in my seat and wince. On the other hand, this hurts like a bitch. Also on the other hand… what do they call it in those chinese cartoons? New Year’s cake?

Right, Christmas cake. Kind of a useless descriptor to be honest. All the women I know are over 25.

On the other hand, one could then argue that every day is Christmas…

Shaking myself out of the concerningly addled reverie, I return my mind to my surroundings just in time to feel the van slow to a halt. About ten seconds later the door slides open. Dr. Cygne is standing on the other side of it, flanked by a trio of burly men. Probable strippers conscripted as EMTs.

She looks around, eyes resting on me. “Well, I can’t say I’m terribly surprised. Never bring a bat to a gunfight.”

>Grit your teeth through the pain and pretend to be fine. roll 3d10
>Admit yourself for medical treatment

>>39700833
>Admit yourself for medical treatment

Rolled 5, 6, 2 = 13 (3d10)

>>39700833
>Grit your teeth through the pain and pretend to be fine. roll 3d10

>>39700833
>Admit yourself for medical treatment

>>39700833
>Admit yourself for medical treatment. Yes but you should see the fucboi mage though.

>>39700833
>>Admit yourself for medical treatment
huh we want treatment right? RIGHT?

>>39700919
Oh man, we're definitely going down for some "Intensive care"...

Rolled 10, 8, 7 = 25 (3d10)

>>39700833
>>Grit your teeth through the pain and pretend to be fine. roll 3d10
death by doctor is not a pretty way to go

>>39700969
Lets be clear here, by that we mean horrific sex in an hospital bed right?

>>39700833
>Admit yourself for medical treatment

Insist that the grunts get legitimate care first though. We ARE their boss, and they DID get those injuries because of this.

>>39701019
Replace "Horrific" with "Amazing", then we can talk.

>>39700833
>Admit yourself for medical treatment

>>39701021
Supporting this.

Along with MILF boobs.

Rolled 10, 5, 3 = 18 (3d10)

>>39700833
>>Grit your teeth through the pain and pretend to be fine. roll 3d10
It's just a short ride to the other doctor. The one that won't try to kill us.

>>39701021
If a doctor doesn't prioritize the guys with bones sticking through their skin, they need to go back to school

>>39700833
>>Admit yourself for medical treatment
Can we hire actual strippers for the injured guys later? Just have them wake up with a pair of them wearing actual nurse outfits to lull them into a sense of normality, then BAM! Have the strippers just pull their clothes off and go to town.

>>39701119
The line between doctor and sex worker becomes hazy in the Nursery, anon.

>>39701188
>>39701188
They fuckin' earned it, yea.

>>39701227
>So tell me, is that a compound fracture, or are you happy to see me?

>AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA GETOFFGETOFFGETOFF

>OH JESUS CHRIST, I'M SO SORRY, THAT ACTUALLY IS A COMPOUND FRACTURE, OH SHIT, I'M NOT QUALIFIED FOR THIS

>>39700833
>Grit your teeth through the pain and pretend to be fine.

I briefly consider fibbing. Then my cracked ribs send a lance of pain through my side once more and I nearly fall over. Dear lord, do broken ribs HURT. Gritting my teeth, I attempt to grin at Dr. Cygne. From her expression it must have come out as more of a rictus. “Next time I’ll ask you for tactical advice, yeah?”

Dr. Cygne merely nods, frowning slightly. “Very well. Can you move under your own power?”

I nod.

“Very well. I assume you know where you should go?”

I nod again.

Dr. Cygne sighs. “Very well. I’m sure Madame Doctor Cutter will be thrilled to see you.”

I manage a leer. Dr. Cygne rolls her eyes and bustles off to deal with my substantially less ambulatory comrades. The trio of strippers/EMTs hurry past, carrying the Associates into the Nursery where presumably one of the Madame Doctor’s several possibly licensed medical professionals will be examining them. Dr. Cygne pauses by me, watching as the third stripper helps the last associate in. “So the only casualties are you and two Associates?”

“Yeah,” I grunt. “And to be frank I don’t think that we would’ve needed much more than what was on hand back at the office. Things went surprisingly well.”

Dr. Cygne nods. “Indeed.”

And with that she hurries inside to deal with more important matters. I sigh and follow her, walking slowly down the hallway to Madame Doctor Cutter’s office.

I stand in front of the door and inhale deeply. Pain shoots through my side and I realize that was a bad decision. Grimacing, I knock on the door before pulling it open.

Madame Doctor Cutter slowly spins around in her chair, wearing a lab coat that would probably violate every hospital dress code in North America. She smiles up at me invitingly.

“Why Enforcer! What on earth could such a dangerous man like yourself would want with a simple doctor like myself?”

>Just coming in for a check up doc.
>Broken ribs.
>Write in

>>39701382
>>Broken ribs.
>Write in
Please, sex later, actual medical care now.

>>39701382
>Broken ribs.

>>39701382
>>Broken ribs.

>>39701382
>Broken ribs.
Fucking knife ear mage decided to od on pix to fight me.

>>39701382
>Write in

"Madame, you know that I can't bring myself to stay away for too long."

>Broken ribs.

>>39701382

>Write in
Why the sole pleasure of your company

>>39701382
>>Write in
Doc, I am afraid I have a few broken bones, will you look at them?

>>39701495
>>39701495
> "Madame, you know that I can't bring myself to stay away for too long."
What, are we playing Danzig now? Fug it's 0613 on a Saturday. I'm too tired for this shit. Goodnight niglets and don't get us killed or ruin our shaky alliance.

Peace.

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>>39701824

>>39701382
>>Broken ribs.
ow.

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>>39701859
Get the gif. nigga.

“Ribs broken doc,” I say, attempting a half hearted smile.

Madame Doctor Cutter blinks at me for a second. Then her face break into a scowl. “Damnation. Broken leg, arm, I could have worked around. Not rib.”

I attempt a weak smile. “Hey, sorry doc. You did say personal medical treatment though, right?”

Madame Doctor Cutter sighs and stands up, her chest bouncing in the lab coat. I watch the motion solely for the sake of my love of titties. Science can go fuck itself.

“Well, this is slightly disappointing,” she sighs striding around the desk a grabbing me gently by the upper arm. I catch a whiff of some very intriguing perfume. “Come along now Jason, it seems like we have actual work to do.”

Grunting neutrally, I allow her to guide me out of the office and into the infirmary. She sets me up underneath an X-ray and gets a few scans. After a few minutes I’m placed on some sort of hospital bed. A woman in an outfit far too revealing to be an actual nurse stops by with a paper cup full of water and what I can only assume are pain killers. I take both gratefully and down them at once.

Man, does it feel good to fall asleep.

Alright guys, sorry for the poor output tonight. Google Docs kept fucking with me.

Next thread... maybe monday? Not sure, we're getting close to finals.

>>39701910
So, if we get ourselves hurt again and for some reason need to come here, make sure we break a rib first. Somehow.
>>39701944
Thanks for running.

>>39701910
We're wearing football pads next time.

>>39701944
We'll see you around, then

>>39701944
Thanks for running, senpai~

How old is cutter supposed to be, again?

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>>39701903
Is this better?

>>39701944
>>39701944
Alexandra Mercer's adventures in Fedoraland next?

I just caught up, thanks for running SG/FG/MG/UG