>>39570503
>subject

I wonder if I'll ever be able to not have a messed-up subject.

>>39570503
And also allow me to apologize on the weird timing. I had been planning to go out for dinner, but discovered I could simply get some sushi and stay at home all alone instead.

>>The mountain! I still remember the sense of sushi...
Today, We make our noble Japanese ancestors proud.

>>39570503
>>Uh, can you tell us what we have to expect from either of those places?
"Or is that against the rules of fair competition?"
>>39570550
Nope.
>>39570609
But you're not alone. You have us. Alllllll of us.

And our recipes.

>>39570854
our many, many, recipes.

File: 1370381512566.gif (205 KB, 500x500)

205 KB GIF

>>39570609

>>39570788
>>39570854
Alright, since it's just you two and myself, I'll go for
>mountain
and
>questions.

Writing.

>>39570936
The "ride" being code for a depressing miserable existence only punctuated by 4chan and sushi from a place not too far away.

But, as far as things go, that's not too bad!

>>39570952
worry not, the numbers shall grow, and if they don't they'll read the archive and show up for the next one.

>>39570503

“Well, I still do have a few questions before we continue, if you’re willing to answer them...”

Sue shrugs. “Ask away. Some I can’t answer, but most I should be able to.”

“Alright. Firstly, what should I expect at the next two locations?”

Sue pouts. “Sorry, can’t say. But I can say that the city is gonna be real greasy, and the mountain will have some Japaneses influences.”

You sigh. “Eh, I already knew that. Anything else? Like what happens once I beat them all?”

Sue nods. “Once that happens, you’re going to have to fight the Witch that’s been holding us in captivity. After all, by defeating the three of us captured Witches, you’ve proven to be Her equal, and that can’t stand. There can only be one True Chef.”

Roland chuckles. “Shogo, it sounds like your life, no matter what you do, is spiraling down to be solely based on cooking.”

“Is there something wrong with that?”

Roland shakes his head. “Not at all. I’m kinda envious, actually.”

“Any other questions?” Sue asks.

>Write In Questions
>Nah, let’s head to (Place)

>>Write In Questions
So have you ever heard of a witch named Gordon Ramsey?

>>39571094
>Nah, let’s head to (Place)


>>39571162
That's probably the Boss

>>39571094
>>Nah, let’s head to (Place)
city.

>>39571094
>>Write In Questions
"So, how long have you been stuck here? What's your favorite dish to make?"
>>Nah, let’s head to (Place)
TO THE MOUNTAIN.

>>39571183
Insert the place you want to visit, anon.

>>39571162
Actually I just thought of this, is Ramsey a girl now?

>>39571220
My bad Mountains

>>39571225
>>39571162

Writing for asking about Ramsey.

>>39571258
>>39571214
Mountains selected. Writing.

>>39571225
Supposedly we're all girls on the inside. I prefer to be a wolf-bear-man on the side with a side portion of War-Eagle-Tiger (AU represent!)

>>39571306

That's not true, Anon. Em-Gees and Witches aren't even human. You are considered human on the sole merit that your magical core hasn't activated. Or hasn't stayed activated. You're not sure about the science behind this.

>>39571385
I still don't get why we can't become Voltron instead of Em-Gee when our magical core activates. I mean, who wouldn't want to go "FORM BLAZING SWORD" right?

>>39571434
Sorry, if anyone is gonna be Voltron it's Roland since he's already into 40K and Pacific Rim, wearing a big ass suit of armor too.

>>39571434
now now, we don't KNOW that we won't transform into an emblem of all that is badass.

>>39571461
>>39571462
Does that mean we can be Captain Falcon at some point then?
I'm okay with that person being Voltron though, I guess.

>>39571094

”Well, I wanted to ask about Gordon Ramsey. You know, the chef from the zeroes and tens? Is he a-”

“I highly recommend dropping that topic for now,” Sue remarks coldly. “It is not a good idea to ask about her here.”

You slowly nod. “O-okay then. So...shall we go?”

“Let’s.”

--

You and your group leave the cottage, with Sue walking alongside. Once you get a far enough distance from the cottage, Sue lets out a sigh, and turns to you. “Sorry about that earlier. It’s not really safe to talk about Ramsey around here.”

“Why’s that?”

Sue frowns. “Well, the Witch that’s in charge of here? Once she had all of us on leashes, she tried attacking Ramsey, at his restaurant in Paris. You know, the one literally inside his Witchspace dimension? Well, it did *not* go well. Ramsey literally stuffed her like a pig and showed her off to the diners that night. The Witch...hasn’t really stopped hating him since then.”

“Wow, that’s harsh,” remarks Roland, “and what’s he doing now?”

“He’s considered the king, or queen, of the Cooking Witches, though they call themselves the Microwave Coven.”

“...Really?”

“No shit. Apparently Ramsey thought it was hilarious.”

As you talk, you cross the starting field and start to approach the mountain itself. As you get closer, you realize that there’s actually a set of stairs leading all the way to the peak, passing under the Shinto arches dotted along the way.

“So,” Sue says, “I have to leave you now, but I’ll be waiting here for you.”

“Sure thing,” you say, as you start walking up the steps. “See you around!”

---

After a good half hour of walking, you finally make it halfway, to be confronted by a bridge going over a small pond. In the pond are many fish, of every species as far as you can tell. You recognize a few, but others are completely foreign to you, especially the eel looking thing as long as Roland which is sunbathing in the middle of the path.

(1/2)

>>39571603

“Uh, Shogo? What’s going on?” Roland asks, curiously tapping the eel with his foot. It merely rolls away onto it’s back.

>Step over the eel and continue
>Look around
>Go Fishing!
>Write In

>>39571627
>>Look around
Time to BE OBSERVANT.

>>39571627
>Write-in
>Look closely at what types of fish you're looking at and what dishes made of one or more of them would be the tastiest

>>39571627
>Look around


Gordon is a witch and is still a dude. Of course with all the crassness he has I doubt he could be female.

>>39571683
Or he could be a sassy black woman. Didn't think of that, did ya?

>>39571702
Oh stop spoiling everything.

>>Look around
>>Go Fishing!
What's the point of cooking if you don't get to use exotic ingredients from time to time?

>>39571702
But he's so british and anglo he literally reflects the light of the moon at night. Him be a sassy black woman would be like Canada not sucking.

>>39571770
Well I guess we're just going to have to find out, aren't we?

>>39571603

You decide to look around. Stepping over the eel, you continue to approach the pond, making a point to not disturb the water too much. As you walk around the pond, you notice some fish following you, others retreating slightly, and more just not giving a single fuck whatsoever.

As you circle around, you finally come across a sign which reads “Feel free to take one, but only one!” It seems to be an invitation. Leaning against the sign is a nice fishing rod as well. You see Roland and Eliza watching you from near the eel.

>See if you can get a salmon.
>Prawn makes best sushi
>Fuck prawn, tuna is where its at
>Are you fucking stupid get some whitetail
>Fuck it, there’s that eel we can take.
>Take more than one. Roll 3d10. Minor DC 7, Major DC Hidden. Prepare your Anus.

Rolled 4, 1, 3 = 8 (3d10)

>>Take more than one. Roll 3d10. Minor DC 7, Major DC Hidden. Prepare your Anus.
salmon and Prawn

>>39571949
:3

>>39571949
WELP I hope somebody rolls better than me.

Rolled 3, 1, 1 = 5 (3d10)

>>39571627
>>39571911
>>Take more than one. Roll 3d10. Minor DC 7, Major DC Hidden. Prepare your Anus.

here we go!

>>39571911
>Fuck prawn, tuna is where its at
>No roll because getting fucked in the ass is not an option

>>39571982
You could always just obey the fucking sign and only take one

>>39571992
Welp, time to die.

>>39571995
And the one reasonable person.

Rolled 10, 6, 2 = 18 (3d10)

>>39571992
Eh, it's not as bad as that time I got triple ones

>>39571992
You know I said better right?

>>39571911
>>Fuck prawn, tuna is where its at

>>39571949
AH didn't see the sign, thought we were rolling for giant fish in that case change
>>39572009
to
>>39571995

>>39571995
>>39572033
Two for tuna, and...
>>39572018
>>39571992
>>39571949
Three for taking more than one, all of which fail even Minor DC.

>>39572056
And you step in. Lovely. Writing for being sensible and >tuna

>>39571911
Take one bloody macguffin.

capthca:glord

>>39572112
Ah, the eel?

Hmm.

I'll wait a bit for more votes, then.

I could just be luring you into getting an eel that's sentient and tastes like shit and will stare at you reproachfully as you attempt to make edible sushi from it. Or not.

>>39572089
That's why you have people roll after they vote, so that they won't change their mind incase they fail.

>>39572174
Fair enough, that makes sense. I'll keep it in mind for next time.

>>39572174
I changed my mind because I didnt see the part about the sign, I thought we were rolling for giant ass fish

>>39572203
Nah, the sign said take one. That option said take two and roll. The eel was its own separate option.

>>39572234
so we can take the eel and a fish without risking the wrath of the great mc'guffin?

>>39572282
I don't know. Want to find out? I'll tell you the eel looking thing is not the macguffin

>>39572305
...nah stick with just the fish, that eel is giving me vibes of "elder god stay the fuck away magic." for some reason.

>>39572336
Sure.

>Writing for Tuna.

>>39572416
That sadness when OP doesn't make us roll to see if we get fresh tuna or canned tuna.

Feels bad man.

>>39572456
Heh. Didn't think of it. No worries, will screw you over later.

>>39571911

Deciding to avoid the probably-elder-god eel thing, you take the fishing rod, and start looking for a tuna. You immediately find a large one in the horde that’s following you, and drop the hook directly on it. It calmly bites onto the hook, and you slowly pull it out of the water and take it off, where it sits quietly in your hands, not appearing too bothered by the lack of water to filter.

“Uh, is that seriously how easy fishing is? I might just take it up if that’s so,” Roland comments, walking over to you. “Now, where do we go? Continue up the path?”

“Wait!” you both turn to Eliza, who’s standing slightly off the path, next to the eel. “There’s a trail here as well. It goes to the side, then bends to continue up the mountain.”

“Alright. Well, how about we ignore the trail next to the,” Roland turns to the eel, “*obviously elder god thing you can stop pretending now*, and continue going up the path already given?”

Eliza counters, “Just because you’re scared of fish as long as you are tall doesn’t mean you should judge trails next to them!”

“...Is that meant to be like an analogy or something?”

You think as the other two continue to bicker.

>The direct path
>The trail
>Ask the elder eel

>>39572547
>Ask the elder eel
Surely that won't backfire horribly, no sir.

>>39572547
>Ask the elder eel
So are you the witch or Cthulhu slumming it?

>>Ask the elder eel
Because fuck it.

>>39572547
>Ask the elder eel

>>39572624
>>39572625
>>39572626
>>39572675

Writing.

>>39572547
>Ask the elder eel
"Dooru laik zooshi mistah eer?"

>>39572691
Very funny.

>>39572547

Ignoring the other two, you walk over to the eel thing, which is still sunbathing. Forgoing your sense of decency and logic, you start to ask it, “Uh, hey there-”

“You know how fucking annoying it is when smartasses like you waltz in here and instantly recognize me for a fucking elder god?” The eel slowly rolls over again and coils to face you. “Because of you genre-savvy fucks, I can’t just get picked up, go to the top of the mountain, and reproachfully stare at people as they try to make edible sushi out of me.”

The other two are frozen at this point, watching the eel in horror. “Uh...what?” Roland eventually manages.

“Exactly. Because of you guys, even if you are shocked that you were right, you’re still too smart to actually go and take me. God damnit.” The eel flips over again. “Ask me your fucking question and let me go to sleep.”

You nod. “Uh, sure. Which path-”

“The one near me. Goes up to the back entrance of the contest area. Allows you access to the pantry that Fancy-Pants-Sama won’t let you guys usually touch. Still wouldn’t, but what he doesn’t know can’t hurt him.”

Roland asks, “What fish-”

“Tuna, like that guy picked. Very delicious, can be served a ton of different ways, and is lovely with corn in a sandwich.”

Eliza asks, “What’s the meaning-”

The eel snorts. “Fourty-two, and if you can’t think up better questions, I think we’re done here.”

>Ask another question?
>Head down the trail
>Head up the main path
>Write In

Gonna be gone for 15 minutes.

>>39572845
>>Head down the trail

>>39572845
>write-in
I like the eel, and all badass's need a familiar, lets offer to take it on our adventures with us!
>Head down the trail

>>39572845
>Ask another question?

Want me to take up to the top anyway?

>>39572925
Because seriously why NOT have a talking eel familiar that will creep the shit out of everybody else, we can make him a big kickass aquarium in the kitchen! One with a giant sign that says "do not try to cook the elder god!"

>>39572845
>>Ask another question?
"Would you like to join us when we leave. Because you kinda seem bored with life."

>>39573007
>>39572925
>>39572975
Writing for familiar.

>>39573007
And this place is probably gonna collapse when I kick the big witches ass.

>>39572845

”Alright, then, how about this: would you like to join us? Going on adventures, kicking ass, and you look really fucking bored as you are now. Plus, once I kick the big witch’s ass, this entire Witchspace will come crumbling down.”

The eel is silent for a few moments. “Well, I was not expecting that. I have a few terms if I am to agree to this nonsense. One, you agree to become my familiar *because I know you were going to ask me that* and two, also something you were thinking, that badass aquarium also has access to a permanently warm rock where the sun can shine down.”

>Accept
>Decline
>Write In

>>39573021
that too.

Why do i get the feeling our current boss is going to be "What possessed you to try and get an elder god as a familiar? And why the hell did you have witches become your allies."

>>Accept
"sure"

>>39573072

Eliza is literally standing right next to you. She's technically your boss. Roland just looks really fucking confused right now.

>>39573070
>>Accept

Quick question DM, can we use hammerspace? or not since we are technically a witch, even if we can only create small magic.

>>39573070
>One, you agree to become my familiar
NOPE
NOPE
ABORT

>>39573098
she is? dammit I really need to read the names of people who are talking.

>>39573070
>>Decline
I can't be your familiar, sorry. the warm rock was a given though.

>>39573116

>Hammerspace

Hammerspace is what both certain Witches and Em-Gees can use to store weapons. Similar to most Em-Gee anime, hammerspace isn't some universal ability, and usually is the power by itself, provided with some things inside hammerspace for use (e.g: Mami's rifles).

Witchspace, which is what you're talking about, is within the ability of any Witch, though exorbitant amounts of energy are required to create one. That's why most gates are near populated areas, since they can feed off the people around to power it.

>>39573153
It's okay, Anon.

>>39573162
Wait, is this straight up declining, or accepting without being a familiar?

>accept
>write-in
If one of the girls DOES try to cook you, just glare at them real hard and tell I said I'd stop cooking if they do, they should back off"

>>39573185
It was saying i'd get the warm rock for you if you're my familiar, other way around is unacceptable. Plus we'd cook for him.

>>39573185
So is that a "yes but you need to find out how to use it" or a no its a special ability that only certain magical people can use?

>>39573185
Wait
> accepting without being a familiar?
is an option?
Can we just offer to cut out the whole familiar thing entirely on either side? Cause if so do that.

>>39573221
Witches can use Witchspace, but you need magic to do it. If you were to siphon enough energy to create some self-sustaining magic circles that can drain energy by themselves, then yes.

>>39573231
You mean being partners? BUT ARE YOU AS STRONG AS TEN EELS? You could suggest it.

Either way, that's three accepts, and I'll add the question on partnership.

>>39573231
But being a familiar is a mutual benefitial relationship. Its generally a given that if you have a animal familiar that you are also counted as there familiar to so I dont see negative. Granted I may be slightly misunderstanding how that works.

>>39573258
Also ask what (he/she/it?) eats.

>>39573070

You think for a moment, before pulling out a piece of paper from your bag. “Alright, let’s get the terms settled. I’m willing to accept, but I’d like to review the familiar requisite first.”

The eel...nods, as much as an eel can, and slides over. “Sure.”

---

Over the course of the next fifteen minutes, while Roland is chuckling with a confused look to his face, and Eliza with her own expression of pure horror, you go back and forth with the eel, planning out the details of the contract.

“Alright, so let’s look it over. One, I am your familiar, but you are mine as well, so we are considered equal partners. That’s good?”

The eel bobs its head. “Yep. Continue.”

“Next, I shall build you a, let me quote, big ass aquarium, end quote, including a 1. Sign saying “do not cook the elder eel”, 2. An access path to a warmed stone in sunlight, and 3. One of those awesome bubbling treasure chests that fish tanks have, appropriately sized.”

“Wonderful. And?”

You finish up, “Finally, in return for my duty to you, you’ll accompany me on whatever adventure or cooking contest I go on, and assist me in my endeavors, whatever they may be. Agreed?”

The eel grabs a pen with its body, and manages to write out a weird script into the signature line, the letters slowly burning into the page. You do the same, without the same effect as the eel’s writing, but you still feel something settle on your soul, an almost tangible need to build an aquarium with the biggest fucking bubble treasure chest you can find. Slowly though, it fades away, until it’s just a presence in the back of your mind.

(1/2)

>>39573430
hells yeah.

>>39573430
I feel like Eliza is not going to comprehend what just happened for a while.

File: screamsexternally.gif (929 KB, 264x320)

929 KB GIF

The eel itself shudders slightly, and turns back to you. “Ah, wonderful. Pleasure to meet you, Shogo.”

“Pleasure to meet you too...WHAT THE HOLY FUCK.”

The eel...pouts, as much as eels can. “Oh come on, it’s just a name.”

“MOTHERFUCKING JÖRMUNGANDR? I MADE A CONTRACT WITH JÖRMUNGANDR?”

The eel raises his tail defensively. “What? I’ll uphold my end of the bargain, it’s binding for me too-”

“FUCK YES!”

Now everyone is looking at you strangely. The eel asks, “...What do you mean?”

“This is great! I’ve literally got the biggest and most badass of snakes on my side. Actually, about that, why are you an eel? At least, right now.”

“It’s more comfortable. No scales to get caught on anything.”

It’s at this point that Eliza frees herself from her coma and runs to you, pulling you away from Jörmungandr. “What the FUCK, Shogo?” she furiously whispers, “you’ve gone an made a contract with THAT?”

Jörmungandr shouts, “Hey! That’s not nice!” But Eliza ignores him, pulling you back down the path. “That’s it, we’re going before any more shit happens. Roland?”

You pull away from Eliza, prying her fingers off your wrist. “It’s fine, Eliza,” you plead, “listen, George is a pretty nice guy now!”

“GEORGE? HOW THE FUCK DO YOU NICKNAME THE FUCKING WORLD SERPENT?”

“Ah, that was actually Odin who first called me that,” George points out.

Eliza continues to scream externally, trying to pull you away.

>Try calm her down.
>Persuade George to head down and wait at the bottom of the slope while you guys finish up.
>Write In

>>39573430
Were there supposed to be options to go with this? or are you still writing the second half?

>>39573724
The (1/2) means one out of two, or halfway.

>>39573719
>try to calm her down
>when that doesn't work just ask George how he would like to travel.

>>39573719
>>Try calm her down.
Seriously George is pretty chill. You're not being chill. I thought you were cool Eliza.

>>39573773
Fuck, didn't even add an ask George option. FUCK

Also

>Ask George what he'd like to do.

>>39573798
And what he eats, does he eat like a normal version of whatever he is at any given moment? does he even eat at all?

>>39573719
Tell her to clam down.
It's funny because seafood.

>>39573719
>>Try calm her down.
"George is cool, trust me. I'll cook your favorite food when we get back. How's that for a concession?"

>>39573849
Dude, you're just fishing for puns. In the end, you're a little shrimp in this game.

>>39573849
NICE! Finally another pun! *Don't forget the sunglasses!*

>>39573883
Yep, finally people are dancing to my tuna

>>39573873
>>39573900
Can we somehow work these in to? possibly when they comment on our constant puns?

File: bait.png (65 KB, 625x626)

65 KB PNG

>>39573719

”Hey, Eliza, you really need to clam down.”

“What? But he’s the fucking world serpent! He’s killed hundreds of people! He’s-”

“Seriously, now you’re just fishing for reasons to get out of this, and it’s r-eel-y annoying.”

Roland is already on the floor laughing, and Eliza seems to be getting more furious, shouting “This isn’t a time for jokes-”

“Come on, don’t be crabby, Eliza.” by this point all the pairs of sunglasses you carry on you at any given time (seventy-four) are out, and you add another to your face each time you speak. “Seriously, George is really chill. And I’m responsible too! Or maybe, you’re just really jelly of me.”

Roland’s sides are in orbit. Even Eliza is starting to break down. “Goddamnit Shogo-”

“This tide of puns will never...a-bait.”

Finally, Eliza is laughing. “Alright, fuck it, let’s take the snake with us. Again, though, what do we do with...him?”

You turn to George. “What do you think?”

George thinks for a moment. “Well, I’d like to come with you. I think it would be interesting to see the contest area not from the perspective of dinner.”

“Now, shall we go?”

>Side Trail!
>Main path!
>Go back!
>Write In!

>>39574128
The path that gets us in that pantry, duh.

>>39574128
>>Side Trail!
Side trail is pantry path, right?

>>39574128
>>Side Trail!
George recommended it, no reason to doubt our new partner. Ask George if he'll slither along next to us, or if he wants us to let him ride in the pack.

>>39574167
>>39574211
Correcto. Writing.

>>39574128

Finally, you all start moving again. George has decided to wrap himself around your neck like a scarf, a gently pulsating scarf that’s face is constantly looking around, sampling the air. “So, George, how did you get here?”

“Unlike half the idiots who let themselves lose here, I chose to come. This is one of the finest Witchspaces I’ve seen, and the only one finer will let me in as a menu option.”

“So how long have you been here?”

“About a month. Found an almost open gate, and slipped through.”

Eliza cuts in. “Wait, you can open a gate on your own? Usually you need some high level stuff to do that.

George shrugs. “I guess. You girls have to go about it a different way. I mean, from what I sense, Shogo here is a bonafide Witch, so he might be able to open or close them, but I notice a distinct absence of magic, despite the core. What’s the story, Shogo?”

You shrug. “Eh, my parents got killed during the Coven Event. I absorbed a bunch of darkness, ended up killing another Witch, and appearing in front of a police station where she,” you point towards Eliza, “found me. I turned back into a guy, and have been since.”

“But you have control over magic?”

You frown. “Kinda. I mean, I can take it in, but I have to release it in the form I got it in.”

George hums. “Interesting. Well, when we get back to that floating island you talked about, I’ll show you a neat trick. Should help you with that.”

Before you can ask what that is, you’re in front of a huge-ass gate, many times larger than the purification gates you had passed through before.

“This is the back entrance?” Roland mutters. “Wouldn’t want to see the front door.”

You all walk up, and find a smaller door within the huge gate, and slip through, entering what appears to be a traditional Japanese house, wooden flooring and thin walls, though you can’t really hear anything at all.

“Where do we go?”

>Room directly in front.
>Left down the hallway
>Right down the hallway
>Write In.

>>39573719
>Write in
I found it shile travelling around Eliza. Can we keep it?
I'll feed it, clean it, and make sure it doesn't eat all the land sea.
I'll even let you pet it... maybe.

>>39574365
Which way to the pantry George?

>>Write In.
detect magic thingy we have.

>>39574471
This.

>>39574471
Magical Radar.

>>39574471

Writing for this, then. plus >>39574419

>>39574365

You decide to sense for any magic within the compound using your radar-sensey-thingy. With it, you find no magic in the door right in front of you, plenty of magic going down the hall to your left, and an absolute fuck ton of magic to the right.

“The pantry is right ahead, Shogo. The entrance contest area is to the left, and the room that the Master sleeps in is to the right.

>Where to?

>>39574604
Dead ahead!

>>39574604
>forward
We can't go into the master bedroom, that'd just be rude.

>>39574604
>Pantry, then contest area
ALL THE SUPPLIES, EXCLUDING HUMAN INGREDIENTS, OF COURSE

>>39574641
>>39574654
>>39574682
Writing.

>>39574365

“Uh, let’s go right ahead for now. Going to the bedroom would just be rude. After we get some supplies, maybe we can head to the con-”

The door in front of you slides open, and an elderly Japanese man with the stereotypical beard and wearing the non-stereotypical apron with “キステェチェフ” written on it. All of you pause as both the old man and the group stare at each other. Slowly though, the man takes a breath.

“Is there a reason you’re here? And not in the contest area?”

---

After a few minutes of talking, you discover that you’ve just run into the guy you’re meant to challenge to an epic cooking duel. You also find out that it’s his lunch time, and he usually prefers tea and sandwiches for lunch, as opposed to an epic seventeen course japanese meal.

So you all find yourself sitting around a dining table as the man serves up some tea, with a plate of biscuits and little ham and cheese sandwiches.

“So, once again, you want to duel me, but that’s not happening till I get my appetite back. What would you like to do until then?”

>Write In.

>>39574870
Ask for sage advice, someone as old as him must have wisdom, even if it is your generic "dirty old man" wisdom.

>>39574870
>[] Make him the same offer you made the last witch

>>39574870
>Ask some questions
Who are you?

>>39574924
like the option

>>39574870
“Uh, just ask some questions, I guess.”

The man nods. “Sure, I’m fine with that. One second,” he stands up from his chair and walks out the room for a few seconds, before wheeling in an old woman in a wheel chair. He speaks to her quietly for a few seconds, before rolling her over to the table. “Sorry, I have to take care of her. I’m sure you’ve already been to one of the other witches, so you may know the drill by now. This is Mizuki, I feed her, I don’t get killed. I, myself, am Joto.”

“Alright. Got any advice for us?”

Joto shrugs. “Not really. I’m only sixteen, last I checked.”

“...You look older.”

“Huh, really? Guess I don’t need a fake ID.” Joto seems unphased.

“If you’re a witch, aren’t you meant to be a woman?” Roland interrupts, speaking through a bite of delicious sandwich.

“That’s right. This is just a magical cover I cast on myself. I’m really good at illusion, not just to the eyes but the tongue. I can make anything taste good.”

“Isn’t that cheating? If you can’t really cook.”

“What’s the difference? I could feed you nutrient paste and to you it would taste like a full steak dinner. Everyone wins.”

You nod. “Alright then. Uh, also, once I beat you, are you sure you want to remain here? I mean, I’m kinda going on an adoption spree-” you point to George, “-and I’d love to have you as an ally, if I could.”

Joto shrugs. “Really, ever since I turned, all I’ve wanted is to keep this illusion on and have an excuse to go to Japan and look up skirts.”

“...Alright.”

Silence. Time passes. Mizuki has a few sandwiches before falling asleep in her wheelchair. Roland twiddles his thumbs, then begins playing Twenty Questions with Eliza.

“Uh, Joto, when do you get your appetite back?”

“RIGHT NOW, YOU FOOL!” The entire room explodes, and you feel yourself falling down, landing heavily on a stone floor. Around you, floodlights come on, and you find Joto standing on a tall pillar.

"COME THEN, YOU FOOL! SHOW ME YOUR BEST!"

>What do you cook

(1/2)

>>39575196
Does tuna sashimi count?

>>39575259
Of course it does. Why wouldn't it?

>>39575196
A badass tuna salad.

>>39575278
HOLY SHIT! I just thought of something! If he uses magic to make his food taste good, let's just absorb that magic!

>>39575331
>>39575259
these

>>39575259
>>39575331
>>39575355

Writing.

>>39575196
You pull out the tuna you got earlier, and get to work on a provided table top. Soon enough, you have the tuna all prepared, and you set to steaming some rice. Soon enough, everything is laid out beautifully, sixteen pieces of tuna sashimi, each with a drop of wasabi to give it some extra kick. Simple, but damn delicious.

Then, you turn and find yourself confronted by what appears to be several thousand plates of several thousand different pieces of maki, sashimi, tempura, and everything else under the sun.

“WELL COME, THEN, FOOL! SEE IF YOUR MEASLY PREPARATION COULD POSSIBLY BEAT ME!”

>roll 3d10 for Absorb suggested by >>39575331

>>39575477
Can we silently ask George if he can lend us a hand in this to make it easier?

Rolled 10, 4, 9 = 23 (3d10)

>>39575477

>>39575502
Yes.

Rolled 6, 10, 1 = 17 (3d10)

>>39575477

Rolled 8, 2, 6 = 16 (3d10)

>>39575477

>>39575502
FUCK THAT
DC 10
LET'S DO THIS

>>39575519
>>39575515
well shit looks like we might not even need to, ah well ask politely anyway.

Rolled 8, 6, 8 = 22 (3d10)

>>39575477
"By the power of Greyskull, I HAVE THE POWER" and then swipe it.

>>39575515
>>39575561

Passed. Just to give you an idea, the Minor DC was one.

ONE.

You're good at this. Writing.

>>39575477
Inb4 all these food our enemy made was actually just reconstituted protein under an illusory mask.

Soylent green are people too

>>39575477
“Uh, hey, George? Lend me a hand?”

He shrugs. “You got this. Go for it.”

You nod, and slowly reach out to the food, palms first.

Joto laughs. “FOOL! YOU THINK YOU CAN DESTROY MY FOOD? HA! THE ONLY WAY TO DO THAT IS TO EAT IT, AND BY THEN I’VE WON!”

You ignore Joto’s unnecessarily loud remarks, and focus on pulling out the energy in the food. You find a lot of it, quite a lot, definitely more than you had thought. Had Joto completely made everything out of magic, with literally powdered protein mix as the starter?

You grab onto the energy, and pull it in. Slowly, it fills you, the deliciousness and freshness filling you with its exquisite taste, until you feel full to bursting. Then, finally,y you put it in your own food, redirecting the deliciousness from a thousand plates into the sixteen sashimi sitting ready to be eaten.

You eventually open your eyes again, to madness.

In front of you, instead of the delicious sushi, is nothing.

Joto seems rather upset.

“WHAT HAVE YOU DONE WITH MY FOOD? EVEN THE POWDERED SUGAR IS GONE! WHY, OH WHY!” he collapses in a pile on the floor, loudly weeping his misery to the world.

“Uh, Shogo. Do you know what you did there?”

“Nope.” you grab the plate of your food, now incandescent enough to be praised, and walk over to where you see Mizuki sitting. You offer her the plate, and she takes one with her fingers, and slowly eats it.

With Joto out of the contest, Mizuki nods, and gives you the win.

>Congratulations! You won...well...

“Listen, Shogo. When you absorbed that magic out there?”

“What about it?”

“Wasn’t just magic. You literally absorbed the food.”

“Huh. Cool.”

>Even the Conservation of Mass and Energy no longer apply! Transform matter into magic with Absorb.

Eventually, you make your way over to Joto, who’s still crying on the ground, hugging a chef’s knife. “No, no, no, I don’t want to lose,” he cries.

>Take the knife
>Help him up
>Write In.

>>39575839
>Take the knife
>Help him up
I absorb magic Joto, you never had a chance.

>>Help him up
>>Write In.
Offer to teach her how to cook until she can actually make that food without magic.

>>39575839
>Take the knife
>Help him up

Sudoku is not the answer Joto!

>>39575908
Also, I'm a little confused, it's a girl wearing an illusion right?
>>39575875
>>39575908
>>39575925
And so we continue our great tradition of doing EVERY OPTION!

>>39575839
>>>Help him up
>>>Write In.
>Offer to teach her how to cook until she can actually make that food without magic
Seconded this idea. Not like the first person we've taught.

We are slowly becoming food jesus, we have magic items, worshippers, a familiar, and now disciples.

>>39575959
Joto was originally a guy. You guess from the way he talks, probably some hardcore weeaboo in america who, with the change, decided to go all Old Man Pervert on it and live out his dream. So far, going well for him, until he got caught.

>>39575875
>>39575908
>>39575925
>>39575959
>>39575978
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3_yhld-dWMQ

>>39575839
Wait a fucking second.

Did we just win by using a magical equivalent of putting the food straight into the trash bin?

>>39576043
No, we won by UNMAKING THE FOOD.

>>39576043
We won by denying the existence of the enemy's food.

We're pretty cool like that.

>>39576043
>>39576070
You absorbed both the magic, and the energy of the food.

Those fifteen sashimi you have left could each last you about a month with the nutrients inside. Try eating a grain of rice and sliver of fish at a time. The magic should keep it from going off.

>>39576121
So we have just created the worl'ds most condensed travel rations? SERIOUSLY.
>>39576009
FOOD. JESUS. this is like the thing he did with bread and fish.

>>39575839

You shrug, and both grab the knife from Joto and pull him up on his feet. “Probably not the time to commit sudoku, Joto. Or whatever it’s called.”

He sniffles slightly. “But I’ve lost, haven’t I? How am I meant to regale obviously uncomfortable teenage girls about my adventures and cooking contest winning streak while trying to peer up their skirts?”

You shrug. “You could just lie about it.”

“Lie,” he mutters, then grins. “That’s IT! LYING! That’s the piece I was missing! Over-exaggerate every single one of my exploits while trying to exploit them! It’s perfect!” he gives you a huge hug, and starts skipping back to the compound, singing happily and loudly.

You notice that you now appear to be outside the compound itself, inside the front gate. It seems the illusion of the room breaking apart must have taken you out here too. You spot Roland and Eliza curled up in a pile to the side.

>You now have the Chef Knife! It’s equal to your Razor Blade in terms of sharpness.
>Get Roland and Eliza
>Leave
>Stay for a bit longer

>>39576171
Isn't it great?

>>39576201
>Get Roland and Eliza

Sweet a new Witch sticker.

>>39576201
>Get Roland and Eliza
You guys ok?
>George what happened? You good to go?

>>39576201
>Get Roland and Eliza
>Leave
also
>You now have the Chef Knife! It’s equal to your Razor Blade in terms of sharpness.
kick. ass. this is now our primary weapon.

>>39576260
Gotta collect all 312,125,768 of them!

>>39576201
>>Get Roland and Eliza

>>39576269
Dual wield and simultaneously shave and sushi everything in your way.

>Writing For Roland and Eliza

It feels like I'm in MSQ with 70% less faggotry, 50% less FUN and 100% more cooking.

I don't know if it's a good thing or not anymore.

>>39576387
>MSQ
What's MSQ?

And the fun is capitalized, so I'm assuming that it's not that proper-fun at all?

Thanks for being so nice :3

>>39576410
Mahou Shounen Quest. I think.

>>39576410
Probably mahou shounen quest.
That quest started on d, so yeah, you could say the FUN is not in any way proper.

>>39576201

You decide to grab Roland and Eliza and quickly make your way out the gate. The two eventually start to follow on their own legs, until you’re quickly making your way back down the path again.

“So, George? You alright there?” you ask your scarf.

“Could be better. Definitely interesting seeing your power in action. You know, you’ve actually managed to avoid routing the power through your core. That should kill you, since no mortal can handle magic, and as far as I’m aware you are still a mortal, ignoring the core.”

“What does that matter?”

“Well, I’m not sure what this routing is gonna do to you. Myself, I’d suggest figuring out how to get it to go through your core again.”

Eliza speaks up. “Didn’t you say once, Shogo, that you felt your core ticking over, once? Jamie said you had told her when you fought that Witch with her.”

You nod. “That’s right. Kinda like an engine, almost turning on.”

George hums. “Strange. Either way, your core could be activated any time. If you continue to route without your core, I’m afraid you may burn out and be forced to transform to repair those routes. For now, I can help you distribute any magic you absorb, but we need to fix that and get your core back into the wiring, so to speak.

“Doesn’t that also risk my core activating?”

George nods. “Indeed. But if you manage it just right, and ‘stall’ the engine, then it may be much better for you. Again, I am unsure why you would not want to become a magical girl, though I understand that you are plenty enough powerful on your own without divine intervention.

Finally, having walked down the entire mountain, you come back to the starting point, where you find Sue waiting against the first Shinto gate, writing away in a notebook. Once she sees you, she slips it away into a pocket, and turns to greet you all.

Though she freezes when she sees George. “I-is that J-jor-m-man-”

>George, introduce yourself
>OUR LORD JORMUNGANDR DEMANDS YOUR HEAD
>Write In

>>39576589

Also: http://strawpoll.me/4209152

I hope you guys are enjoying this quest. I am, for sure.

>>39576589
>OUR LORD JORMUNGANDR DEMANDS YOUR COOKING

>>George, introduce yourself
Smile real big.
>write-in
"He'll be coming back with us, I agreed to make him a big kickass aquarium back at the castle."

>>39576589
>OUR LORD JORMUNGANDR DEMANDS YOUR HEAD
Then
Nudge her in the ribs
And say
>George, introduce yourself

All while attempting to put shades on George.

File: Results.jpg (201 KB, 1031x727)

201 KB JPG

>>39576639
And the results are in!

>>39576589
>George, introduce yourself

The reason I don't want to be a MG is because I've been a guy all my life and I'm rather attached to my junk. Fair enough George?

>>39576589
>George, introduce yourself
nothn to see here, on to the cooking

>OUR LORD JORMUNGANDR DEMANDS YOUR
fail at keeping straight face part way through, begin laughing our ass off and say
>George, introduce yourself

>>39576696
Four-way tie now.

>>39576736
>Four-way tie now.
Not any more!

>>39576678
Writing for >joke

File: 1428520345380-2.png (49 KB, 233x213)

49 KB PNG

>>39576696
>doing OOC stuff while running

>>39576872
Do you guys enjoy me talking with you all outside of story?

>>39576678
huh, i'm not seeing the joke
>>39576935
yeah, it's awesome to talk to you.

>>39576589

”OUR LORD JORMUNGANDR DEMANDS YOUR HEAD.” You start shambling towards Sue, who’s backing up like crazy, only to be caught by Roland and Eliza, who are both holding back laughter.

Slowly, you approach Sue as she gets more and more terrified until she lapses into a state of pure shock as you get right up next to her, George around your neck hissing...

And bop her on the nose.

“Haha, hilarious. George, introduce yourself.”

“My honor to do so. Nice to meet you Sue, I’m Jormungandr, though my friends call me George. Like you!”

Sue stands for a few seconds before finally giving in and collapsing in a faint. Luckily, with Eliza and Roland still holding her, you manage to get her safely to the ground.

“Well, that worked well. What do we do now?”

>TO THE CITY!
>Eh, let’s leave for now and come back later. The portal will still be here, right?
>Write In.

>>39576935
Yesssssssssssss. Otherwise we would feel lonely and probably start arguing about whom the best waifu/husbando would be.
>>39576965
>>TO THE CITY!
>Write In.
"Anybody know any good traveling songs? I know mostly camp songs."

>>39576965
>>TO THE CITY!
Finish the contest now! True Chefs NEVER back down from a challenge!

>>39576965
>>TO THE CITY!
Prepare for a world of grease.

>>39577000
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3mDWzu5yxLg

^Try this anon.

>>39577018
Hmmm, I am now wondering if certain (SUPERIOR) food chains (like Five Guys) are owned by Cooking Em-Gees/Witches. It would be funny in my crazed opinion.

so I have to ask, did you plan the whole jormungander thing all along, or did >>39572336
inspire you?

File: ymca.jpg (42 KB, 500x331)

42 KB JPG

>>39576958
That's nice to hear. And it's a pleasure to talk to you too, anon.

>>39577000
Alright then: http://strawpoll.me/4209230 please respond fairly,and please don't fight over the results.

Writing for city.

>>39576935
I like it when QMs actually talk outside of quest posts.
Is why I enjoy BQ so much I suppose.

>>39577047
Yes, most superior food brands are owned by cooking related Em-Gees or Witches. Five Guys is owned by five guys, funnily enough, who all became witches just after starting their business. The original Five Guys is still being run by them to this day.

>>39577054
Dropped him as a plot point, and figured you guys would inspire me.

>>39577041
Nice music, anon.

>>39577094
Lovely. I'll continue to do it.

>>39576965

“To the city!” you declare, marching forth, George wrapped around your neck in a glorious scarf and your apron wrapped around you like an amazing cape and Roland and Eliza following you like followers, you suppose. For you are a cooking GOD, and nothing shall stand in your way!

---

Soon enough, you make it to the city, by which point Sue has woken up and has begun to talk to George a bit, still wary but a bit more relaxed now that she realized the JORMUNGANDR thing was just a joke.

Once you reach the city, the only real smell that hits you is that of grease. You can’t spot any cars, and the buildings themselves are incredibly plain. Only one real feature sticks out, and that’s what appears to be the source of the grease: a diner, with a large neon sign reading “The Witchin’ Kitchen.”

>Enter
>Look around
>Write In.

ShogoxShogo wins by a large margin. How strange. I thought Roland was good, but Roland was a good follow up. In the end, though, Roland was really the worst.

>>39577184
>Look around

>Look around
>Write In.
Huh, been a while since I made something that screamed 'MURICA
>Enter

>>39577237
seriously, all the things

>>39577257
But anon, if I don't even try to offer you options then I might as well go write a book. I mean, I've done that, and it's fun, but not as fun as the illusion of free will

>>39577184
>>39577237
>>Look around
>>Write In.
>Huh, been a while since I made something that screamed 'MURICA
>>Enter
Thirding.

>>39577287

Writing.

Refer to that song I posted earlier in the thread. Do Everything Now, by Saintmotel. Good band, great music.

>>39577332
eeeh i'm more of a voltaire man myself.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yjJDBP292rM
THIS SHALL BE OUR BATTLE ANTHEM!

>>39577353
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yjJDBP292rM
Huh, nice music. The guy actually enunciates, so I can understand the lyrics, and a good tune. You have great! taste, anon.

>>39577415
thanks, voltaire's pretty brilliant. He specializes in dark comedy.

>>39577184

“Huh. Been a while since I’ve cooked anything that’s been overtly democratic or freedom-loving,” you comment, looking around. Even with the buildings looking washed out, you can make out the sixties-era adverts and style around you, adverts for cars and burgers and processed everything.

“Do you think you can do it?” Eliza asks. Roland and you look at each other for a second and start laughing at her sheer stupidity.

“I...I think I’ll be able to handle it,” you say, wiping away a tear. “After all, it’s not like I’ve managed to do this twice already and so utterly trumped both opponents they’re still crying. Or, at least on the inside. Right, Sue?”

Sue nods. “Yep. Inner thoughts, all crying, all the time.”

“So, shall we go in?”

“Let’s.”

You open the door, sending out the classic ring of the bell attached to the door, and walk into the diner. You see booths going up and down the side of the room. You see a few booths filled, one with what appears to be a very old woman with a rather large black woman taking her order, and another booth where what appears to be a middle aged woman dressed in a stylized chef’s coat is eating a plate of what appears to be some very delicious scrambled eggs and toast.

Apart from that, the diner is completely empty.

>Go to the serving woman.
>Sit with the middle aged woman.
>Find a booth of your own
>Go back to the kitchen
>Write In

>>39577446
Is that your usual kind of music, or do you have other recommended artists? I'm into all styles of music, really.

>>39577491
>>Find a booth of your own

so guys, might as well start planning now. how about some good old red white and blue pancakes, to really drive home that 'murica point?
*for those of you who don't know, blueberry pancakes with cream and strawberries on top.
>>39577491
>Find a booth of your own
alright, if you want music i'll give you music.

>>39577491
>>Find a booth of your own
Personally, I'm a fan of Imagine Dragons' "Warriors," but I also play League of Legends, so I'm biased.
>>39577527
But what syrup(s) will use? That can be really important too!

>>39577551
>Imagine Dragons' "Warriors,"
For you, I have https://soundcloud.com/broilerofficial/shots-remix
One of my favourite songs of that genre.

And obviously fair-trade democratically sourced syrup from liberated countries, like canada.

>>39577491
>Go to the serving woman.

>>39577527
Ah, but is the focus Murrica, or simply fast food? Because when I think of greasy fast food goodness, I think of the glory that is hash browns. Though maybe we can do some fried chicken and waffles to go with it? Man would that be carb heavy, though...

>>39577569
America is incredibly diverse. You could go Cajun, if you wanted.

>>39577579
Too true we could go Cajun BBQ TexMex etc; theres so much

>>39577491
Writing for own booth.

>>39577619
Also, DUTCH OVEN COOKING.

>>39577491
>>39577527
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VW9wlPtDc50
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LcmBALxDkRY
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f1lbeYSCh7A
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PUMCIn2swTU
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=haOys7E2Zbo
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NCHq0m67lq8
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=And-vdjC71E
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VmkySNDX4dU
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xqf0vkyYfGA
(the anime is hellsing ultimate btw)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ytWz0qVvBZ0
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uF1Q56YAo0Q
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z-8NmN393R4
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DP8ndCOuuno
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bBeSi-ODfJk&list=RDbBeSi-ODfJk
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tK5mQWdJkyQ
THAT ENOUGH MUSIC FOR YA?!

>>39577491

You decide to go for your own booth, and the others follow, all filing in. You stay on the outer row, so you can stand up and walk out the booth easily, if there happens to be sudden cooking contest.

The woman walks on other, wearing a big smile. “Hi there folks, what can I getcha?”

>Coffee
>Tea
>What clogs the arteries and kills the body?
>Chef’s recommendation.

>>39577646
You missed an opportunity for a glorious rick roll.

>>39577658
>Chef’s recommendation.

>>39577658
>You missed an opportunity for a glorious rick roll.
DAMMIT
>Chef’s recommendation.

>>39577658
>Tea
But make it sweet tea! Iced sweet tea. Gotta stick with the theme and all.

>>39577658
>>Chef’s recommendation.

Also, for final boos Witch if we persuade her to follow us or tag along or join us in some shape or fashion to let her know we care:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dQw4w9WgXcQ

>>39577734
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dQw4w9WgXcQ
Aaand there we go.

Writing for Chef's Recommendation.

>>39577646
Have you heard Flight of the Conchords? You must have with that music list. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mlYkIJVguCU

>>39577658
“Uh, I’ll have whatever the Chef thinks is the best, thanks.”

The woman nods approvingly, writing down something on her notepad. “Good choice. Anything to drink?”

“Sweet tea is all.”

“And the rest of you?”

Eliza frowns. “Uh, aren’t we meant to duel or something?”

The woman also frowns, leaning into Eliza. “Why are you so impatient? Come on, girl, just eat some dinner and we’ll get to the hustle-bustle later.

She leaves with your order, leaving your table alone, with just the noises of the very old woman eating and the middle aged woman cooking more eggs in her booth, for whatever reason.

Eliza speaks up. “Uh, Shogo? Look, I know you’re extremely capable, but I can’t help but feel that ever since you’ve joined us, this entire witch fighting thing has been getting more and more absurd.”

“Talking eels meant to be snakes, real 40K armor, and cooking contests with witches,” Roland counts off on his hand, “seriously, we might as well just start performing Waiting for Godot, or Rhinoceros.”

You shrug. “I guess. I mean, I’m sure if you want it a bit more grimdark, I can pretend to be all edgy.” You let your voice lower. “Those witch bastards killed my parents. Thus, I need no friends and will try to kill everyone in my way until people tame my ways and show me the light of friendship and kindness-”

(1/2)

>>39577965


“-Chef’s Recommendation?”

You look towards the woman, holding up a plate, containing what appears to be four pancakes all made to look like the letters L, E, U, and D.

“Good heavens,” Roland mutters, checking his watch, about the size as a normal wall clock, “look at the time. Our talk of absurdism seems to have gotten in the way of this obviously non-absurd and normal storytelling.”

Eliza gives up, putting her head on the table as she slowly cries away her frustration at everything going wrong around her.

You graciously accept the clock from the waitress, setting it in front of you. She also offers you a knife, fork, and bottle of syrup.

>Eat duel o’clock.
>Share it with rest of party
>Write In.

>>39577987
>Share it with rest of party

and headpat Eliza or something, never good to stand idly by while a girl's crying in frustration. Such things tend to come back at people at inopportune moments.

>>39577987
>>Share it with rest of party
"It'll be okay Eliza. Good things come to those who wait after all."
Passing out now. CRY MORE HAVOC.

>>39577987
>Share it with rest of party
Also Comfort the ancient magical girl.

>>39577987
Writing.

>>39577987

You share the pancakes with the rest of the party, one for everyone except George, who’s content to just sit on the windowsill and absorb the sun. You lean over and pat Eliza’s head. “Hey, come on now, it’s fine. We’re almost done with this. Once we’re done, we can get out of here and pretend this never happened. How’s that?”

Eliza half-heartedly agrees. “Okay then.”

“Wonderful! Now,” you signal the waitress, “excuse me, ma’am, now that we’ve had that absolutely amazing meal, mind if we go for the Duel thing now? It was in the pancakes, after all.”

The waitress shrugs. “Sorry, someone’s before you in line.”

“Who?”

She points over to the middle-aged woman who’s continuing to cook scrambled eggs that look progressively more delicious.

>Write In

Almost done for the night guys, just need to do one final plot point and I’ll be crashing too.

>>39578185

...Uh.

>>39578308
Since everyone's gone, this thread ends here. Might do it tomorrow, though the abruptness seems strange.

twitter: https://twitter.com/artemisQM
Archive: suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=ArtemisQM

See y'all around sometime.

>>39578415
Thanks for running!