You’re rudely pulled out of your revery, “Hoi! Who’s makin that smoke?” A voice calls from the barn door, “Someun in there?” You jolt, staring up at the door, the farmer never exactly gave you permission to be in here. Nor have you ever talked to him, then again, it might be yet another squatter, looking to share what little heat you can provide. Maybe he’ll have real food.

>Can’t risk it, extinguish the fire, hide in a pile of hay.
>Run for the hills!
>Invite whoever it is inside
>Write in

>>38627012
>Can’t risk it, extinguish the fire, hide in a pile of hay.

>>38627012
>>Can’t risk it, extinguish the fire, hide in a pile of hay.

>>38627012
>>Can’t risk it, extinguish the fire, hide in a pile of hay.
Time to become a magical pornographer?

Damn your schedule Chuckles, I'm heading to bed now.

>>38627012
>Can’t risk it, extinguish the fire, hide in a pile of hay.
Nobody here but us mice.

You quickly toss your belongings into the nearest pile of hay, and kick a pile of dirt that was secretly covering a rock, crushing your toes into it.

Resisting the urge to howl in pain, you kick some more dirt over the meager amount of firewood and dive into a pile of hay, rolling about as quietly as possible to try and hide inside it.

You hear the door creak open, under the quiet snoring moos of the cattle and light footsteps heading sneaking inside, shutting the door behind them. A muffled voice, whispering to itself, "Huh... coulda sworn..." barely audible of your heartbeat in your ears.

You hear the footsteps wander around more, then the striking of a match, light flaring against the hay around you.

You dare to brush aside a small bundle of hay,revealing one eye to the barn, staring at your barnmate. A rather bumpkin looking elf of indeterminate gender is standing at the back of the barm, sucking wind through their teeth and looking about. You do know for a fact that the farmer is a human however, supposedly of ill temper.

The elf turns their back to you, making confused noises and kicking at the dirt you kicked over the embers.

>Stay hidden, they can't find you in here
>Try and rush the elf to attack
>Their back is turned, make a break for it

>>38627176
>Stay hidden, they can't find you in here

>>38627176
>Stay hidden, they can't find you in here

>>38627176
>Rush the elf.

If ingenuity can't make me rich, crime will.

>>38627176
>>Stay hidden, they can't find you in here

Stealthily use your magic to produce sound outside the barn.

>>38627176
>Their back is turned, make a break for it

>>38627176
>Stay hidden, they can't find you in here

Time for voyeurism.

>>38627176
>Stay hidden, they can't find you in here

You shift the hay back over your face, as the match dies out. The elf grunts in annoyance for a second, fiddling with another match, before you hear rushing footsteps.

You feel the hay above you get tossed off you, leaving you lying on the ground, in nothing but your underwear.

"Hoi friend. Ya bleeding ev'rywhere." The elf tells you, pointing out a trail of dark red spots in the dry dirt, leading from the rock you kicked to the pile of hay. You glance down, and sure enough, you're bleeding rather messily from under two seperate toenails.

Piss.

The elf takes a few steps back, leaning against a beam. "So fello' miscreant, thur a reas'n yer hiding in the dark in nut'ing but your smalls?"

You lick your lips, swallowing dryly.

>I thought you might be the farmer.
>I didn't want to be robbed
>Write in

>>38627303
>I thought you might be the farmer.

>>38627303
>"My fetishes are none of your business."

>>38627303
>I thought you might be the farmer.

>>38627303
>"My fetishes are none of your business."

>>38627303
>I didn't want to be robbed

>>38627303
>>I thought you might be the farmer.
>I thought you might be the farmer.

>>38627303
>I thought you might be the farmer.

"I-I thought you might be the farmer. I didn't want to be on the nasty end of a pitchfork is all." You quickly stammer out.

"Yes, I'm sure I greatly resemble a human." The elf nods slowly, tossing their silvery blonde hair behind their shoulders, "Hmm. Welp, names Aeglin. I take 'at was your fire o'er there?"

You nod slowly, keeping your eyes on the stranger as you cast about for your robes with your hands. "Yes, but it was small, not much spare wood around these parts, I'm afraid."

Another nod. The elf looks down, fiddling with something in it's hands with interest. You glance down too, finding prying, short nailed fingers twisting your device every which way, the elf's brow furrowed in annoyance, as they look half ready to snap it open.

The elf notices your line of sight and rattles it like a barbarian, as you hear cogs and machinery twist and shake about, "What'in the twen'y hells does this ball thin' do?

>What do

>>38627449
Magical moving picture box.

Be careful with it, I make my living with it.
Well I try to anyway.

>>38627449
>use device as a pretext to get close, kill him and take his things

>>38627449
Panic, take it away from the elf, then since it is the one thing in the world we're proud of, naturally we need to completely sperg out and tell the elf absolutely everything about it.

>>38627449
>Demonstrate by taking a recording of the elf.

>>38627461
With what? We are a terrible wizard, and probably malnourished.

>>38627449
>>38627464
Seconding. Absolute sperg.

"BE CAREFUL WITH THAT!" You screech, making an attempt to snatch it out of the elf's grip, only for them to twist and walk across the barn, still inspecting and shaking it.

"Look's like junk to me." The elf shrugs, making to drop it to the floor.

You dive ,catching in outstretched hands just in time. "You idiot! This is a highly advanced piece of magical technology! An innovative branch of... an astounding new world of- of- life's work!" You rant disjointedly, panic still fluttering in your chest.

The elf shrugs. "It's a ball. I was gonna bounce it."

"It's not an ball, simpleton!" You spit, "It's.... an orb! One capable of taking high quality images of anything seen through this hole and projecting them, without a surface.

The quirks their head, "Like a puppet theatre? " "Dey used to have those all the time back when I was a lil'un."

You fume to have years of research compared to a child's entertainment, "This took me nine years to perfect, and you compare it to shadow theatre!" You hiss. The elf just shrugs again. "This- YOU!-I..... This is how I'll make my millions, you'll see!" You insist.

"WILL make your millions, huh?" The elf asks with a smirk, "So I take that it hasn' star'ed yet, giv'n the whole...." They gesture around, "Barn livin'."

>Shut up, I'm smarter than you, knife ears!
>Storm out
>Oh yeah, well what's your big ticket idea?
>Write in

>>38627596
>Oh yeah, well what's your big ticket idea?

>>38627596
>It takes intelligence and wisdom to see what a masterwork this is! Everyone else is just an idiot.

>>38627596
>>Oh yeah, well what's your big ticket idea?

>>38627596
>Oh yeah, well what's your big ticket idea?

You sneer, "Oh yeah? Well what's your big ticket idea then?"

The elf shakes their head, ear tips flapping in the breeze. "Me? No big ticked for me. I'm not manag'm'nt. I'm j'st looking for a job where I c'n settle down. Maybe some muscle work over in Flilgren. I hear there's good work there... if you're willing to get ya hands dirty."

You shake your head, an ambitionless drone, how very dull. On the other hand,

>Ask if you hire them as a bodyguard to be repaid later, the debtors are still on your tail
>Follow them to Flilgren
>This elf isn't worth your time, wait for them to move on.
>Other

>>38627742
>Follow them to Flilgren
>Get our orb back

>>38627742
>Ask if you hire them as a bodyguard to be repaid later, the debtors are still on your tail

>>38627742
>Ask if you hire them as a bodyguard to be repaid later, the debtors are still on your tail

>>38627742
Ask him if you can film him having sex with something.
Elf porn sells well.

>>38627760
Does it? If we invented the world's first camera, there has never been elf porn before now.

>>38627760
>>38627773
Wait so porn doesn't exist, and we invented the first camera, and we want to make lots of money.

Should we open the world's first porn studio?

>>38627784
We need to figure out sound recording as well, first.

>>38627799
Point.

Chuckles, can you confirm if our recording device records sound too?

Also what kind of magic can we do?

I am assuming basic illusion magic?

>>38627799
Wonder if we can find a way to spin the "fades after viewing" as a feature. Get your fetish fix while after the deed, it removes the evidence! Now your wife will never know your secret elf fantasies!

Disposable porn, it is

>>38627889
On a less lewd note, we can also film concerts or plays and then charge people to view them.

>>38627906
fuck that we have to jump start the porn industry

>>38627906
I guess, but sex sells, and if we film plays and concerts it won't be long before their producers and writers are demanding a cut of the profit, if they don't just skip straight to breaking our legs.

>>38627912
Obviously, but if we encourage tasteful uses for it, boring, religious people won't be so quick to ban it. Plus if someone finds your orb, you can say it's a charming local production of The Paladin Came To Tea rather than Slutty Gangbang Elves VI.

>>38627949
We are running from debt collectors. We need money quick.

Tasteful stuff takes longer time.

>>38627906
Also good for sending spying/secret messages. It be like the whole "This message will self destruct at the end". Minus the self destruct part, more self wiping

>>38627961
I was thinking in a more long-term way. Obviously the first priority is porn, once we've figured sound out.

Also good for making maps, or painting references. get a long ass pole, climb a tree, and you got a city map. Just draw it down.

We need to make a friend with a cartographer, or something.

>>38627961
Speaking of debt collectors should we make them an offer they will probably refuse and try to get them in on our project? I mean I don't see why they wouldn't they could just break our legs later if our project falls through.

>>38627949
>Plus if someone finds your orb, you can say it's a charming local production of The Paladin Came To Tea rather than Slutty Gangbang Elves VI.

Then we make a porn parody of The Paladin Came To Tea, right?

We can call it The Paladin Came In My Tea.

Chuckles just said on twitter that he got a 3 Day ban

>>38628062
Aw, fuck. Why? What's his account?

>>38628082
PokeMangQM

"Well, look... can I hire you as a bodyguard? There are some very not nice orcs who want nothing much more than to smash every bone in my body to powder. I can't pay you now... but once I have my fortune, I can provide you with anything you want!"

The elf tilts it's head, scratching it's ear absently. "Much as gettin' all me bones smashed to bits sounds unpleasant, I do like the soun' of anythin' I want." The elf spits in it's hand. "Tell ya what. You follow me along to Flilgren and I'll do it. Kill two birds w'th one stone 'n'all that."

You weakly grab the saliva coated hand and shake. "Deal."

"Now go'n get some sleep. 'M leavin' early." Over it's shoulder it adds, "And wipe summa that spit on your toes. Us elves are mid- mud.... medicinal, thassit."

You've never heard that before. Then again, you're no biologist. Gingerly, you try swabbing some of the remnant goo onto your toes, sighing in relief as the bleeding seems to slow.

You collapse back onto the bale of hay, stowing the orb gently and tugging your robes back on finally.

Your awoken by the angry yelling of the farmer, only for an short grunt to quickly follow, as Aeglin lays him out on his back with a quick punch.

You drag the unconscious man inside quickly and hit the road, heading eastwards. The elf sets an insane pace on the road, leaving you sore and blistered in your attempts to keep up, desperately sucking at your water skin and wheezing.

The town finally rolls over the horizon after two more days on foot, the both of you covered in road dust. "Now.... where 'n the hell would we find some work?" Aeglin mutters under their breath.

>Might as well try and impress the local lord with your orb first
>A tavern, they're always a good start in the stories
>Those nasty looking men over there with the scary tattoos, they probably know.
>Other

S'cool I can post the story posts for Chuckles for a while.

>A tavern, they're always a good start in the stories
Good place to find loose women too.

>>38628108
>>Might as well try and impress the local lord with your orb first

>>38628108
>A tavern, they're always a good start in the stories

>>38628108
>A tavern, they're always a good start in the stories

>>38628108
>A tavern, they're always a good start in the stories

>>38628108
> A tavern, they're always a good start in the stories

So how did the chucklefuck get banned?

>>38628234
Posting lewd images on /co/.

>>38628284
We told him to stop that hand holding stuff. Its too lewd.

>>38628301
That filthy pervert.

>>38628284
Moron

“Let’s scope out the tavern?” You suggest, looking everywhere but the big scary men playing knife games. Around a chess board.

Aeglin nods, turning into the first hole in the wall she can find, descending some stairs into a smoky taproom. The roar of drunken patrons clashes against your ears, as you follow the elf up to the bar. They get a dry ale, while you just ask for a soft cider. The barmaid snorts, but pours your glass for you all the same, waiting for pay expectantly.

Aeglin stares at you and you at the elf for a second, until they relent and fish a lone coin out of their sock, pressing it onto the counter. The woman rolls her eyes and bits the coin to be sure, as you wander off. Aeglin sits, looking about the room and pointing out people who look interesting, “So, how do you plan on making some money to pay me, oh great wizard?” The elf asks, cracking their knuckles.

>There are more scary looking men in the corner, they’re probably part of the local crime ring
>There are some guards who seem pretty drunk, cut their purses?
>Other?

>>38628331
Explain our genius plan, we take a recording of sex, then sell it. People love sex, right?

Look around for some people who look reasonably good but still trashy enough that they might go along with this offer in exchange for a cut of the profits.

>>38628331
Okay, you seduce barmaid, I take pictures, then we sell the show to some pervert?

>>38628331
Did that woman just bite a coin from an elf's sock?

>>38628331
>Other?
>What do you think of the barmaid?

Question is Aeglin a grill you called her a she but went back to gender neutral in the next paragraph

>>38628360
Well, everyone has their fetishes.

We don't really need someone else. A masturbating elf could sell fairly well.

>>38628331
Make a show of our picture orb

>>38628403
To criminal elements?
You want to get robbed?

>>38628401
This is also true, we need to probe Aeglin (no pun intended) on what exactly s/he is willing to do to earn some gold.

If there is magic cameraman, does that mean there's a magic editor out there somewhere?

>>38628420
Magic Tumblr, coming up!

>>38628436
If we do go through with the plan to become this world's first porn director, magic tumblr will hate us.

Barmaids gone wild here we come
>>38628331
>convince elfin companion to seduce the barmaid with the promise of a fantastic T-shirt

>>38628436
>>38628452
"Capture Orb, more like Misogyny Orb!"

>>38628452
Social Justice Paladins will be delighted as long as our porn has diversity, so we should make Orc-on-Elf asap. Right? .... Right?

>>38628482
>reinforcing racial stereotypes

>>38628482
Yea we need Orc on Elf action. Or maybe gnoll on dwarf?

>>38628491
Sorry, Elf-on-Orc. I'll check my privilege.

>>38628482
Sure, plenty of interracial so we can claim we're breaking down social barriers and being progressive when we release "I can't believe I Fucked a Dwarf"

>>38628532
Wasn't there a thread of dwarf porn examples?

"Okay... I have a plan. Have you ever heard the old adage 'Sex sells?' well..." You place the orb on the table and stare at the elf expectantly.

Aeglin stares at you, then the orb, then you again. "Ha! You think I'd share a bed with a skinny runt like you?" He asks, laughing.

You shake your head, "Well no... I was thinking that we find one of the - ahem- drunker patrons in the room, you take them somewhere private and I.... capture the process on my device here. Then, I can set the memories in pebbles off the side of the road, we sell them for five coins a pop. They're only single use, so we'd have a market that keeps coming back."

The elf strokes their chin, running their eyes around the room. "Sounds like... it could make a decent amount of coin. But I don't know that I'm no performer."

You slap a hand on the table. "Listen, Pointy, do you want your money or not, because this seems like the fastest way to go about it."

The elf sighs and looks around. "Well... I guess." They start picking out the drunker looking people around the bar, none of them exactly fair spring maidens or prince, but not hideous, if that's your thing....

>The barmaid
>The orc woman arm wrestling the guards
>The dwarf man in the corner
>The elf woman who's carrying plates

>>38628576
>The dwarf man in the corner

>>38628576
>The elf woman who's carrying plates

>>38628576
>>The barmaid

>>38628576
>The elf woman who's carrying plates
Start with some hot elf-on-elf action before we go interracial

>>38628576
>Elf woman

>>38628576
>>The orc woman arm wrestling the guards
fuck yea (muh fetish)

We should ask the dude, witch one he prefers taught.

>>38628576
>>The elf woman who's carrying plates

Now Aeglin is referred to as a he. Damn Elves.

Elf girl wins, chuckles is writing now.

You point at the rather distressed looking elf woman, carrying plates back and forth to the kitchen. She's not much to write home about body wise, but she has a decent face, for an elf. "How about that one?"

Aeglin shrugs, "I suppose. I'm going to need to be very drunk for this." They add, swiping your cider and downing it in one go, before returning to her ale.

You frown, but allow it, considering Aeglins the closest you have to an ally, and likely your only source of income.

"Ssssoo. How do we go about thish?" The elf asks, as the kitchen girl walks past. "Do I... y'know, charm'er, orr do you wanna tell her about your magical massshine and pay her too?"

The orc guard that the elf is serving grabs her and pulls her into his lap for a minute, setting the elf blushing and attempting to escape, while trying not to anger the guards. It's largely ignored, though you see the barmaids grab something tightly under the bar, until the orcs let the elf go.

Resettling her clothes and trying to preserve dignity, the girl starts heading back to your kitchen, her path leading her right towards your table.

>What do?

>>38628801
>though you see the barmaids grab something tightly under the bar, until the orcs let the elf go.
Weapon. Let's not try anything too far.

>>38628801
>Be polite and straight forward, explain what our device is and what we plan to do with it as well as what we need her for and how much money we intend to make if she helps us with this.

>>38628801
>Tell her everything, offer her a cut if the profits or, if refused, recommendation of someone who might be interested instead.

>>38628801
Aeglin charms her a bit, then we explain about the machine and offer a cut of the profits.

>>38628801
Tell our friend not to drink himself silly. If he is too drunk, he wont be any good at convincing, or the sex. If he does not want to do it, we can think of something else.

This is important. We need Quality porn, not some guy pissing himself and falling asleep.

"Aeglin, easy on the booze!" You hiss under your breath, before leaning your head out in front of the elf woman. "Hello. Hi, how are you my good woman?" You ask, trying to affect a charm that spending so much time studying has not given you.

The elf woman shrinks away a little, before clearing her throat. "I'm okay, thanks for asking... Is there something I can get for you two?"

Aeglin waves you on to explain, trying to contain a hiccup. With a sigh, you explain, "Well... you see, miss...?"

"Fajiela." She says bluntly.

Aeglin snorts as you continue, "Well Miss Fajiela, I have... a business opportunity for you. One that can make all three of us a lot of money."

You spot the women glance down at her bare feet and ratty dress for a second, "I'm listening." She tells you, barely audible over the room.

"Well, to be honest, I have a device that can capture moving images of whatever I point it at." You begin, "And my friend and I realised we can create a market for recordings of... lovemaking, selling them to people in town."

The elf woman's blush expands, riding up her cheeks and into her ears. "I... um- that's very forward of you...." She mumbles, eyes downcast and knotting her dress between her fingers.

"I assure you, you'll receive more than a fair share of the profits, and may leave at any time you want." You insist. "All that's required from you... is to enjoy yourself for a while with my friend here, while I capture it."

The elf woman clicks her tongue. "I.... but this is... immoral! I couldn't!"

>Well do you know someone who could?
>Other

>>38629129
There's nothing immoral about it, you are simply giving others a chance to share in your joy and bringing happiness to their lives.

>>38629129
>Well do you know someone who could?
>Emphasize how lucrative this will be.

>>38629129
>>Well do you know someone who could?
(orc woman, or the dwarf, please).

>>38629129
Assure her it's not immoral, after all, it's not like we're paying her for sex, we're giving her a cut of profits from a shared business venture.

Hopefully a LARGE cut of profits.

>>38629176
If there are racial rivalries in this world, the dwarf may attempt to kill us if an elf hits on him. Just saying.

>>38629207
All the more reason to help bring elf and dwarf together in peace, harmony and dickings.

I'd rather put a little more effort into convincing the elf first though.

>>38629129
There's certainly nothing immoral about it, but if you're not comfortable with our proposition maybe you could direct us to someone interested?

>>38629207
Or he could warp elf penis in his mighty beard, while giving blowjob.
Dwarves are hot.

>>38629229
And then two elf, one dwarf threesome. Victory!

>>38629244
Glorious.

After we've warmed up both elves to the idea of fucking each other, we can start warming them up to the idea of additional non-elven participants.

>>38629260
We are... The Pornmaster.

>>38629198
This girl needs to do her self a favor here and make some real money

So I have to go away soon. If one of you wants to take up the mantle of Not Chuckles, send Chuckles a message on twitter or steam.

Can't chuckles just use proxy or something?

>>38629357
Since someone posted about him being banned in the thread, that would mean that if a mod saw it they would ban him for ban evasion, and he would never be able to use his trip again.

So no.

"Well, the way I see it, there's nothing immoral about it. Simply a shared business venture that could stand to make us all very, VERY rich." You pause for dramatic effect. "But if you don't want to, could you point us to someone who would be more comfortable?"

The elfs purses her lips, curling them over her teeth, before raising a finger towards the barmaid. "Josie.... the owner. She's.... well the rumours say she's..... frivolrous with her body."

You nod, "Well, thank you Faijiela, sorry that you don't want to take part in our deal." You scoot your chair back and wave Aeglin towards the bar, "Come along brute, we have a barmaid to talk too."

Just as you're about to walk away, the elf woman grabs your robes sleeve. "Wait! How much money do you really think this could make?"

>No need to bother yourself, we'll talk to Josie
>A lot, enough to make you more than comfotable
>Well, there's only one way to find out, isn't there?
>Other

>>38629383
>Well, there's only one way to find out, isn't there?
but add in something about how we're sure that a beautiful woman like her would be a big hit and earn us a lot of sales..

>>38629383
>>A lot, enough to make you more than comfotable

>>38629383
>Depends on how good the product is, but I can't see why it wouldn't make a small fortune.
Let's see if we can get her AND Josie. Pity we don't have sound as well.

Test

>>38629383
>>Well, there's only one way to find out, isn't there?

Depends on performance, and how much people want to see it.

People are usually willing to pay a lot of money for magic.

>>38629441
>People are usually willing to pay a lot of money for porn
FTFY

>>38629383
>Well, there's only one way to find out, isn't there?

>>38629453
Well, both, really. So just imagine magical porn.

It's good we're such a pioneer.

"Well, there's only one way to find out, isn't there? Although, the better the.. product, the more people will be willing to pay."

She nods again, as you guide chewing her lip. "Okay... well, we can use my room. It's upstairs, on the third floor." You drag Aeglin by the collar towards the stairs, offering for Fiajiela to go first.

She leads you to a small room, barely larger than a cupboard and with no window. She fumbles about inside to light her single candle, filling the room with a dull orange glow. "C-come in." She stammers. Aeglin stumles in, collapsing onto the small bed, slapping themself in the face to wake up.

Tiredly, your bodyguard strips their clothes off, you watch with a morbid curiosity, having been unable to ascertain their gender for so long. A flat, lightly muscled chest helps you none whatsoever, as Faijiela shuts the door nervously.

You take the orb and try to find the best angle in the room, as Aeglin fumbles with their pants.

"I... what do I do?" Faijiela asks, as Aeglin finally undresses revealing a womanhood under her breeches. Fucking elves, never can tell.

"Undresshing would be the first part." Aeglin slurs. With fumbling hands, the kitchen hand undoes her dress, letting it fall to the floor in a heap, quickly followed by her smalls. She's bustier than Aeglin, but that's not a high bar. "Now what?" the elf asks, "I've never.. with a woman..."

>Write in

>>38629673
One of my brother's colleagues used to make porn magazines. Apparently he made a fortune from the weirdest shit, like women 'sexily' getting out of bathtubs full of baked beans. Plenty of weirdos to cash in on, out there.

>>38629711
Get them to start out slow, some kissing and touching, no need to rush things, just let her get used to it and move on to the hardcore stuff once she's feeling more comfortable.

Is there a time limit on how long a recording we can make?

>>38629711
>give directions (good thing there's no sound) and start slow, get them used to it while we film.

File: Spoiler Image (68 KB, 461x535)

68 KB JPG

>>38629711
Well, you start with some construction, using a tongue and groove joint.
Then you move to manual exploration, really knuckle down in there.
Finally pic related.

>Spend 9 years being mocked and reviled
>End up making lesbian elf porn
>WHO'S LAUGHING NOW?!

>>38629711
Get proper light up in there.

See if you can get/make some props. Strapons, anal beads, rope, maybe makeup?

Also is there sound, and is the picture flat, 3d or what? can we get parameters here? Its hard to imagine what looks good, when we don't know the room layout, or camera specs.

Start with make up, and light make outs, till they are comfortable.

>>38629769
Definitely me.

>>38629769
"Yeah fuck you jeff, thinking you were so cool majoring in Adventuring Battlemagic. Enjoy your tetanus from goblin spears, I'll be here watching elves make out naked."

>>38629711
>Lock the door.

>>38629711
>Directions! get Aeglin on the bed before she trips over anything. Faijiela on top some kissing and petting to get them going then maybe >>38629767 and can't forget to Lock the door

>>38629791
>See if you can get/make some props. Strapons, anal beads, rope, maybe makeup?

I don't know how well we can magic up such things, I'm certain we don't have the money or contacts to get hold of them right now, and we don't want to bring in anything which might make our young starlet panic.

>>38629812
We need to get a base of operations where we can... "Test" new girls.
I'm thinking a nice tasteful black leather couch would look nice

>>38629837
Yeah, let's go easy for now. We'll have more funds later.

>>38629849
We need to earn enough money to buy a studio first and foremost, yeah.

>>38629837
...so no wargs yet, I take it?

>>38629849
Is it wrong that I want to play a wizard with absolutely no interest in sex or porn? Just in it for money and magic, can't see why everyone's so interested but willing to take their cash anyway.

>>38629889
I was under the impression we were doing this because we could make some good money fast which we need to keep our legs not broken.

>>38629889
I dunno, I'd prefer if our wizard keeps it professional though, no dicking his actresses. Mixing business and pleasure would just cause us problems in the long run.

>>38629876
Someday anon, someday.

You gently urge the kitchen maid forward, sitting her on the bed next to her co-star. "Why don't you two just ease into it. Just... kiss each other a little, get comfortable. I'm not even here, okay?"

You hit the record button on the orb and face the eye towards them, keeping silent and closing in on the two elves faces, as Faijiela nods slowly and leans down, pressing her lips to Aeglins'.

The drunker elf cackles a little, throwing her arms over the nervous redheads neck, pulling her in tighter. She resists for a second, but relaxes, melting into it as Aeglin looses her grip.

Aeglin reaches up and brushes Faijiela's hair out of the way with a sly wink to you, allowing you to better record them, as your bodyguard starts to gyrate underneath the kitchen hand, grinding their crotches together.

The kitchen hand squeaks and moans into the kiss, rolling with the movements now, her resistance fading.

With a predatory laugh, Aeglin rolls the kitchen hand underneath her, drunkenly kissing and licking her way down the redheads body.

The drunken elf winks as she licks her costars crotch, driving a finger into the younger woman, at the same time. Faijiela, for her part, gasps and bucks her hips, as you move back to the wall, capturing the whole image, as Aeglin works the kitchen hands insides, Faijiela lying back and panting, occasionally insisting on "Theretherethere," and muttering prayers to some god or another.

"Fu-shi-Aooohh." Faijiela cries, as a short burst of fluid splashes out of her, right into Aeglins' eye. Your bodyguard winces and shuts it, but rolls with it like a champ. She sits back and wipes it off her eyelid, before tasting the finger in her mouth and waving sultrily at the orb.

"Buh-bye now." She huskily whispers, blowing a kiss, before her eyes roll up in her head and she passes out backwards, snoring loudly. You quickly stop the recording, as Faijiela cups her hands over her face in embarrassment.

>Reassure Faijiela
>Get to work on copying ASAP

>>38630160
>Reassure her

>>38630160
>Reassure

>>38630160
>>Reassure Faijiela

>>38630160
>Get to work on copying ASAP
>"Shagadelic, baby!"

>>38630160
>Reassure Faijiela

>>38630160
>Reassure Faijiela
Girl's got talent, it would be a shame if we couldn't bring her back for more recordings in the future, build up a proper fanbase.

Once she's reassured, then we can move on to copying, we should play back one of the copies to ensure the quality though.

>>38630160
>Reassure Faijiela
then
>Get to work on copying ASAP

Also we might want to do couple more shots. 1 scene is no porno.

>>38630235
good point try to convince Faijiela to do something solo after reassuring her?

>>38630235
It's cool, we're refining our art, we can move on to full movies soon enough, maybe even with storylines!

>>38630235
>Also we might want to do couple more shots. 1 scene is no porno.
We can earn more by selling scene-by-scene.

>>38630235
These people have never seen porn before, one scene can do for now.

>>38630235
I don't think we can do that currently. I think it can only hold one memory/scene In its current model

>>38630254
I can see it - a party of attractive adventurers descend into the lair of a dark Lord, where boom chicka bow-wow occurs. Chainmail bikinis optional.

>>38630278
If I understand correctly we copy the scene to single use stones (?) some amount of time.

We just make a bunch of stones, and then overwrite the scene with next one, make more stones, and so on.

Can someone that is Not Chuckles explain this stuff?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ns510OqKgKA

We need to find a bard who can play music for our recordings.

File: Obituator.jpg (215 KB, 760x596)

215 KB JPG

Also we need to meat up with some Oglaf dwarves.

>>38630405
...
But there's no sound.
Are you suggesting we hire a bard to break into people's houses while they masturbate? Cause I'm all for it.

>>38630405
We don't have sound...

>>38630430
>>38630452
I mean once we deal with the sound problem, which should probably be our next area of research.

Although I guess if we do public viewings in seedy taverns we could have a bard playing off to one side in the same manner as the pianist in the era of silent cinema.

>>38630411
How have these guys not shown up in any of the campaigns I've been in yet?

>>38630430
We need to get this thing to record sound and also make it so that a recording can be seen more than once. Also, find a way to edit our videos.

You lean in and pat the kitchen hand on the shoulder. "You did good work, you're a natural. I can see you going places if you want to continue."

She looks up at you and nods a little, her blush fading. "Th-thanks.... I don't even know your name?"

"Oh...." You shrug, "Call me Reece. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go find some pebbles. I have work to do." You tuck the orb into pocket and head down into the street.

Wandering around, you find a stonemason's workshop, his small lawn littered with stray fingernail sized stones. You hop the waist high fence and scrabble about in the grass, gathering as much as you can, until the mason spots you.

A few streets later, the huge bastard gives up chasing you. You take a moment to rest against a wall, catching your breath and ignoring the blisters. Slowly, you draw the orb back out, pressing the pebbles into it. "ABSORB!" You command. With a flowing of energies, you copy the scene from the orb, sending the memory outwards, into the handful of pebbles, and even into the ring on your finger, as a handy way to demonstrate.

The memory should still persist in the orb for a few days before it fades. Muttering another spell, you feel like it can only handle a few more scenes that long before it's memory overloads.

You decide to leave the scene as is in the orb for now, in case you need more copies, pocketing all the pebbles but one, using it to double check that it all worked properly.

Glancing around the alley to doublecheck its empty, you hold it tight in your hand and whisper, "Reveal."

Sure enough, the image projects outwards, admittedly like shadow puppets on a wall, but in colour, the scene of the elven tryst playing in 100% quality to how it happened, the two woman writhing silently. Ignoring your tensions, you cut the projection, feeling the memory fade from the pebble.

"Excellent." You tell yourself.

>Start selling now
>Other

>>38630529
I don't know, but once my party gets to the dwarven area? All of the huge dicks.

>>38630593
If we ever get a multi watch version, it should be charged at a premium vs the single use disposable ones.

>>38630603
>Work out prices and how much for everyone's cut. DON'T sell until our bodyguard is up and ready to defend us, in case there are problems.

>>38630603
>Start selling now
Find a seedy bar so the guards don't get on our case.

>>38630603
We should wait for our elf girl body guard to wake up. That way we have someone on look out for us.

>>38630631
We should also do a subscription. One monthly fee, all of our scenes.

>>38630657
this

>>38630603
We should give out some pebbles for free to some teenage boys. First one on the house.

>>38630603
No selling until we have Aeglin with us. I do not want us to get robbed, and we can't exactly sell these in upmarket areas.

We need to figure out a means of permanent storage. The orb can only record a few scenes, can only transfer those scenes to one-use stones, and the memory fades from the orb in a few days.

Chuckles, how much does it cost to make another Orb?

>>38630727
Are the scenes high quality enough to just recopy from a stone if we have to?

>>38630603
We should ask our elven friends if we should sell in next town over.

Because selling porn in porn actresses hometown is not a good idea.

How long the stones hold charge?

>>38630776
Good point, also voting to ask them.

>>38630333
QM has declared each stone to be able to hold multiple scenes BUT each scene can only be viewed once.

>>38630776
Stones hold charges indefinitely also with current resources, it would be impossible to make another orb due to lack of magic shit.

Why the fuck are we using this shit for fucking porn of all things?
Go to military with it!

>>38630871
the monies man it's all about the money

>>38630871
Because the lords we offered it to were dipshits.

>>38630871
Private sector has better funding.
Maybe a mercenary company, though.

>>38630871
Because the military will just cut us out of the equation as soon as possible. Nobles are dicks.

We need to run our own business, and porn is the way to do it.

Also because this is a Chuckles quest, so lewd is kind of a given.

So, how much are we paying our actresses? I'm thinking 1 coin per sale, that's a 20% share each.
Additionally, how much should we pay our bodyguard on top of that.

>>38630969
I don't really know what the going rates are in this world. If chuckles could give us some idea of what various jobs pay we could figure out a fair cut.

>>38630969
Yea, we need to know going rates of stuff.
Not Chuckles?

>>38630969
5 per stone. 1 for each actress, 1 for bodyguard, 2 for us, so bodyguard gets 2 as well.

>>38631010
Makes sense, that's what I was thinking.
Would be good to know the value of a coin, though. How much is a loaf of bread?

You decide to head back to the tavern, walking back up to the elves' room and knocking. You wait for the latch to be undone, before you're let in. Aeglin is still passed out on the bed, Faijiela having thrown a blanket of the woman, her snoring louder than an area of explosion spell, and you'd know, after all the times it was used to wake you up in the middle of the night.

Fucking Skairi. Battlemage School prick.

Faijiela has redressed, knotting her dress in the back. "I'm sorry mister Reece, but I have work still. I just hope Josie hasn't already noticed I'm gone."

She quickly bustles out past you, straightening her hair out, feet barely making a noise on th hardwood floors.

You sit at the opposite end of the bed from the sleeping elf, counting out how many pebbles you actually have.

"Fifty eight, fifty nine, sixty." You finish, as Aeglin jolts awake.

"Oh... How long was I out?" She groans, rubbing her head.

"An hour or so." You inform her. "Not that it matters much, you fulfilled your role satisfactorily. Even if you did pass out early."

Aeglin shrugs, "Since when are you th' boss here?" She asks, "Last thin' I remember, you owe me the money for a job I completed. Two in fact." You grunt, "So how much of a cut am I getting here? Hells, how much are we even charging?" She asks, casually slipping her shirt back on.

>Write in

Average pay for a town guard is 15 gold coin a week, this is enough to to get by and have a 4-5 spare to spend on luxuries, farmhands make 8, blacksmiths, butchers and common townsfolk make 12 gold per week and still have a few leftover
Eg: a loaf of bread costs 2 coin
a room for a month costs 50
a nice building to rent might cost 600 a month
a good horse costs 1000
etc etc

>>38631145
>>38631010
This comment, and ask the two whether they're okay with people in this town buying, or if we should go to another town to do so.

>>38631145
Suggest >>38631010 for cost.

We should find somewhere a bit further away to sell it though, Faijiela probably wouldn't appreciate us selling a recording like that in the place she works.

>>38631145
this seems fair>>38631010

>>38631010
This 5 is affordable.

We do need more scenes, and rocks.

We should get separate bags for each scene, so we don't mix them up.

>>38631145
If a loaf of bread costs 2 coins, then we should make these cost 1 or 1.5.
Asking for 5 is two day's worth of meals, and more than half of what a farmhand makes in a week.

>>38631296
What about 5 gold for two stones? People probably won't want to watch it just once, anyway.

>>38631201
>>38631231
>>38631254
>5 coins is reasonable
>62% of a peasant's weekly earnings, 42% of a townperson's weekly income
Are you guys insane?

>>38631321
You may be right, but the question is, can we divide up coins into a smaller form of currency? Because we can't make the cost too low if we need to split it effectively four ways.

>>38631145
Maybe 2 per stone. I'm assuming we'll be selling more than one stone, so we can divide it up between us afterwards.

20% for Faijiela, 40% for ourself and Aeglin.

>>38631145
Yeah, changing >>38631201 to 2 coins, 5 is a bit much.

>>38631321
Its a magic item. 3 days of work per magic item seems ok.

>>38631340
We can just split when we sell multiple ones. Divide after every 4rd one sold or something.

Is this really fantasy porn director quest? This is brilliant.

link to post for vote

>2 coins per stone
or
>5 coins per stone

>>38631396
>3 days of work per magic item seems ok.
It's limited-time use item for watching porn.
Grainy porn at that.

>>38631438
>2 coins per stone

>>38631438
>2 coins per stone

>>38631439
Perfect quality according to >>38630603

>>38631438
>2 coins per stone, I guess.

>>38631439
No, it's perfect quality.

>>38631438
>2 coins per stone

>>38631145
Two per stone, we'll work out the cut at the end.

>>38631438
2 per stone, until we get a better selection, and more permanent means of storing.

Also save a handful of stones for commemoration.

>>38631438
>2 coins per stone

>>38631567
Yeah, these will probably be worth a ton someday too when we're famous, our first ever recorded scene.

You run a few numbers through your head, "I'm thinking we sell each pebble at two coins each. We can figure cuts out later." Aeglin's eyes narrow dangerously, until you continue, "But I'm thinking we both get forty percent, twenty for Faijiela. Sound good?"

She nods, yawning. "Sure, tha' works fine b'me. Are we hitting the street now then?" She asks, tugging her breeches back on. She cracks the door open slightly. "Sun's headin' down. Ya wan' go downstairs 'n sell 'em? There'll be more customers by now."

You pause to clarify, "Hang on, you know that you getting an extra twenty percent is dependant on you staying as my body guard, yes?"

She rolls her shoulders and cracks her knuckles. "Sure thin'. But withou' any weap'ns, most I can do is punch folks real 'ard."

You nod, remembering the scary rogue types you'd seen earlier playing knives in the bar and outside.

>We should sell here, tonight
>Find another bar
>Sell them at the guards barracks
>Don't sell them in this town

>>38631681
>Find another bar
I don't know about going all the way to another town, but we should at least not sell them in Faijiela's workplace.

>>38631681
>Find Faijiela, check if we can sell in this town.

>>38631681
>Sell them at the guards barracks

>>38631681
>Find another bar

>>38631681
How big is the town?Does the Guard wisit here often?
We need to ask Faijiela for permission to sell in this town. We don't want to accidentally sell it to her angry brother that works as town guard.

If that's okay with her leave some stones for her to sell, and go to barracks, and then to other bars/taverns.

>Find Faijiela, check if we can sell in this town.

>>38631716
This. Get her approval on both the split, and where to sell. Don't want to ruin her reputation.

>>38631681
Ask Faijiela if she's okay with us selling in town, if so, go to another bar.

>>38631808
We don't need her approval on the split, it's a perfectly reasonable rate we're offering her, but we do want her permission on selling sure.

>>38631681
Find Faijiela, check where we can sell in this town.

>>38631846
The approval on split is just as a matter of course. Along the lines of a contract.

>>38631681
>Find another bar

>>38631874
20% of all profits for a few minutes work is pretty damned generous, she'll be fine with it.

>>38631935
I understand that. I'm talking about good business practice though. It's good to get an early start on this stuff.

>>38631935
Depending on setting church might burn her at stake for this.

>>38632039
I think it might have been mentioned by now if the church went around burning sex workers.

"We should ask your costar whether it's okay for us to sell in this town, shouldn't we?" Aeglin shrugs, "I assume you don't mind if people recognise you then?"

"Hells no, sounds like fun. I can get my name out there." She twists her neck to pop a last bit of cartilage, before following you downstairs.

Faijiela is having some sort of conversation with the Josie woman, but you catch her eye, and after a minute, the elf politely breaks away, coming over to your table. "What?" She asks, glancing around.

"We just wanted to let you know you'll receive a twenty percent cut, and wondering if you were okay with us selling your.. performance in town?" You whisper, as a crowd of dwarves burst in, cheering happily too Josie.

Faijiela glances over at all the new customers resignedly. "Yes, fine.... just not in our bar, please? Josie would tease me about it for the rest of her life!"

You nod. "Thanks, you've made a sensible business decision Fai." She nods, already moving away to draw up shorter tables for the dwarves to share, Aeglin watching her go, eyes flicking side to side with each shake of the red heads hips.

"Right. So, where're gonn' sell?" Aeglin asks, slapping you on the shoulder and shoving you towards the door. "Hells, might even turn a live show if it's some'ere fun. Ge' a free meal out of i', eh?"

>Good idea
>Bad idea

then

>Guards barracks
>Find a seedier bar, if that's even possible

>>38632100
>Bad idea, but we're doing it anyways.

>Find a seedier bar, if that's even possible

>>38632100
>Good idea
>Find a seedier bar, if that's even possible

>>38632100
>Good idea
>Guards barracks
Make sure we don't show the orb, and be prepared if they try to steal it or the rocks.

>>38632100
>Good idea
Could be good for promoting our recordings.

>Guards barracks
I mean, we're not breaking any laws yet, right? Because no laws relating to this technology exist yet. May as well cash in on a richer market while we can.

>>38632100
Give Faijiela couple of rocks to sell.

then hide our orb, and go to guard barracks to sell this stuff.

Time to film guard-on-elf gangbang...

>>38632176
Agreeing to hide the orb.

Link to post for vote

>hide orb

or

>bring orb

>>38632323
Hide Orb

>>38632323
>Hide orb

>>38632323
>hide orb

But do it decently, so it doesn't get stolen and shit.

Can we shove it up our ass or something? Noting is more hidden than up the ass.

>>38632323
Hide orb.

>>38632323
>hide orb

>>38632376
Well, that depends on what kind of live show we end up doing.

>>38632404
We can do inside view for cum shots, wen guards buttfuck us lol.

You head back up to Faijiela's room, hiding the orb underneath a corner of her mattress, obscuring the rock melon sized lump with blankets, pressed into the back corner of the room, before asking directions to the guards barracks.

You knock, hearing boisterous conversation inside. A slot opens in the door at human eye level, a green face lowering to meet yours. "Who tha hell're you?" The orc bellows.

You take the question, "We're... somewhere between entrepreneur and entertainers my friend. Might we come inside? We have the perfect cure for all those lonely nights spent up on the town walls."

The eyes squint, before the slot slams shut. Just as your about to curse your luck (not figuratively, you never learnt how to cast a curse), the door opens inwards.

"Orright, come in den, come in." The orc woman grumbles, as you note the knife on her belt. "No funny bidness orright?"

"We wouldn't dream of it my noble guardsman." You dutifully swear. "Would you gather your people together? We have a proposition for all of them."

She rolls her eyes, before hollering, "OI! LISSEN UP YOUSE LOT!" The guards look up from their bunks and cardgames, watching you all around the brightly lit room, waiting expectantly, as the orc shoves you forward between the shoulder blades.

You cough,

>What is your pitch?

>>38632608
Ladies and gentlemen - and those who don't aspire to be either - I have in my possession a number of items for sale, for a mere 2 gold choice, which I hope may make your nights a little more, ah, enjoyable. If I may give a small, family-unfriendly display of these wares?

File: JarJar_masher.jpg (109 KB, 664x704)

109 KB JPG

>>38632608
Mesa offering you magical lesbian moving picture stones.

Demonstrate sample.

Depending on how quickly word eventually spreads and critical reception, we should get Fajiela some protection too. She's going to have a bigger reputation thrust on her than she's used to.

>>38632681
This. Definitely get the sleaze out of the way right off.

>>38632868
The one use thing is useful to control the spread of notoriety for now.

>>38632868
Heh. 'Thrust'.

Just got here. Is this a goddamn Reece the rude origin story?

>>38633166
Oh god.
I didn't even notice that.

Fuck.

And we can probably even record sound alone later, to have
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=2HQaBWziYvY

>>38633166
Who?

>>38632608
"Alright let's cut to the chase. No offense intended but we all hit those points in our life where we are a tad unfulfilled in the bedroom. And sometimes you hit a dry spot that lasts longer then you hoped it would. And while your hand and imagination may cut it at first the magic of it starts to fade. That's why I'm introducing my patented Pocket Girls. These small marbles will hold images of people doing various lewd acts for your own entertainment. For two gold you will receive a stone with an scene already implemented on it. The enchantment only lasts a limited time but once a week I will be updating it with a new scene to keep it fresh. And so that you don't have to feel like your wasting money every week, if you come with an already purchased stone you can get the new image installed for only 50 GOLD! So that do you say?@

>>38633295
I like the bit about costing only 50 silver to get a new image installed, since it's only temporary.

"Ladies and gentlemen - and those who don't aspire to be either - I have in my possession a number of items for sale, for a mere 2 gold choice, which I hope may make your nights a little more, ah, enjoyable."

"What 'sat fucking wizard want?" A guard calls from the back, sounding dangerously annoyed.

You continue on, hoping to the gods your voice doesn't crack, as it tends to under stress. "If I may give a small, family-unfriendly display of my wares?" You cast around for any nods of approval. None come, but no one says no either.

With a dry mouth, you fish a pebble from your pocket. "With the utterance of the magic password, my stone can release magically moving pictures for your entertainment. The piece I've chosen to show you all tonight, is something my elf acquaintance here helped make earlier today."


You pull the pebble close and whisper reveal into a balled fist. Seeing the light shining between your fingers, a few heads perk up. "BEHOLD!" You cry, opening your hand, projecting the image of elven cunnilingus onto the wall.

A few guards spit their beer out, others cheer and jeer, eyeing Aeglin lustily beside you as she bows to her audience.

A few at the back boo, some complaints about 'I'm a a married man.' and 'against the gods' persist a few people at the back even standing and leaving when the others tell them to shut up and leave. Aeglin blows a mocking kiss after them as they leave.

Soon enough the stones memory ends, fading out of sight to disappointed groans. You overhear a few guards asking who the other elf was, as you step forward again. "Now, my friends, for just two gold you can experience my masterpiece again, though I do warn you, each stone only works once."

Guards rush forward, pressing coins into your hands, and taking their pebbles from Aeglin, who smiles to her adoring fans. Within an hour, you've sold all fifty nine pebbles, a fat sack of a hundred and eighteen gold sitting in your pocket
(cont)

“We did well today, eh Aeglin?” You ask, divvying the numbers in your head. “Forty seven gold each and twenty six for our redheaded friend.

Aeglin nods distractedly. “Hmm? Yeh... tha’s good.” She mumbles. “That orc over there... Mmmm-mmm. She looks scrum’tious... Think I might have her for dinner.” She slinks off, flirting with the guards, teasing her admirers with flashes of her upper chest, before she approaches the orc and leaps on her, pulling the green woman into a savage kiss.

You shake your head; Elves, what’s one to do. You feel a pang of regret at not having brought your orb, as Aeglin tears the orc womans shirt open, exposing the guards chest, only for the orc to pin her against the wall, shoving fingers down your bodyguards breeches.

You decide to head out into the night for some fresh air, away from the stale smoke and ale stink of the guardhouse, when you hear scuffling dirt behind you. “Alright Reece. Time to pay up!” You hear behind you, a near illegible voice, that of one of the half trolls the university hired to hunt you down, accompanied by the whistling of a club through the air.

>End of part 1

Good stuff, thanks for the thread Chuckles (and Not Chuckles), I'll be looking forward to the next part.

>>38633528
Thanks for running!

>End of part 1
>This isn't a one shot quest
>Chuckles is now running 5 quests

You're insane, but the good kind of insane. Thanks for running.

>>38633528
So in one day we earned around 8 times what a guardsman earns in a week between us. Best idea ever.

Now we just have to live long enough to enjoy it.