Archivessuptg: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=Kabbalah%20Questmoe: https://archive.moe/tg/search/subject/Kabbalah%20Quest/Previous threads: https://archive.moe/tg/search/subject/Kabbalah%20Hero%20Builder/Docs for Builder Characters' Stories: https://drive.google.com/open?id=0B2Qypb3FIXuMMFFaSGxYRWs1NkE&authuser=0Character SheetsLink to editing the spreadsheet (You don't need to login): https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1cJqoeFxkMKAfwbeeAR_jTa0bxAMvWaMaUuRmjzxc-Hg/edit?usp=sharingYou are TRIDEAG, the LEPERCHAUN, and you are in the middle of combatt with a MIMIC!LAST TIME on KABBALAH QUEST: Your savior Ask rescued you from a tree, and then took you back to his "homebase," where you helped look for his "pet." After you found his pet, the three of you trekked through the forest, where y'asll found a weird treasure sure chest that had teeth, tongue, and gold in it!You raise your hands as you prepare to fight the mimic as your friend runs off into the woods after that rebellious girl.>Launch a fireball at it with one of the forbidden techniques. (Rolls 1d20, Best of Three)>Run away>Help your friend look for that fire (Avreage of Three)
Rolled 3 (1d20)>>37579742>Launch a fireball at it with one of the forbidden techniques. (Rolls 1d20, Best of Three)
Archive:suptg: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=Kabbalah%20Questmoe: https://archive.moe/tg/search/subject/Kabbalah%20Quest/Previous threads: https://archive.moe/tg/search/subject/Kabbalah%20Hero%20Builder/Docs for Builder Characters' Stories: https://drive.google.com/open?id=0B2Qypb3FIXuMMFFaSGxYRWs1NkE&authuser=0Character SheetsLink to editing the spreadsheet (You don't need to login): https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1cJqoeFxkMKAfwbeeAR_jTa0bxAMvWaMaUuRmjzxc-Hg/edit?usp=sharingYou are TRIDEAG, the LEPERCHAUN, and you are in the middle of combatt with a MIMIC!LAST TIME on KABBALAH QUEST: Your savior Ask rescued you from a tree, and then took you back to his "homebase," where you helped look for his "pet." After you found his pet, the three of you trekked through the forest, where y'asll found a weird treasure sure chest that had teeth, tongue, and gold in it!You raise your hands as you prepare to fight the mimic as your friend runs off into the woods after that rebellious girl.>Launch a fireball at it with one of the forbidden techniques. (Rolls 1d20, Best of Three)>Run away>Help your friend look for that fire (Avreage of Three)
>>37579760>Your savior Ash*
Rolled 16 (1d20)>>37579760>Launch a fireball
Rolled 12 (1d20)>>37579760>Launch a fireball at it with one of the forbidden techniques
>>37579755>>37579870>>37579940With great haste and focus, you mutter, "Haramtekni: Narharrkajahannam.">16Flames spew forth from your fingers, and ignite the dry wood that the mimic's encased in. The foul creature screeches as its tongue whips around wildly. The creature is in pain from your fire!The beast is aflame, and you haven't even begun to show your wrath.>More fireballs! (Roll 2d20, Best of Three)>Insult it and its clan (Roll 1d20 Average of Three)>Go help your friend catch that one girl (Roll 1d20, Best of Three)
Rolled 8, 3 = 11 (2d20)>>37580023>More fireballs! (Roll 2d20, Best of Three)
Rolled 11, 13 = 24 (2d20)>>37580023>More fireballs!
Rolled 20, 16 = 36 (2d20)>>37580023>More fireballs! (Roll 2d20, Best of Three)
>>37580311>>37580153>>37580125You raise your fingers at the strange creature, muttering that spell again.>20You launch forth a fire ball from your unblemished hand, engulfing the helpless Mimic is flames. It screams with much scraping as its wooden hull is consumed by your will. After about half a minute, its wood shrinks and disappears into ash.The Mimic takes another form now that its chest is gone. The coins all gather in the shape of a buxom woman with a large, lougue, drooling tongue. The teeth from before appear as tusks, claws, and horns on her. She charges at you, intending to rip your throat out!>Cont.
>>37580721>16You launch another burst of flame from your pierced hand. Half of the Coin Lady's face melts.The woman brings a hand up to her face as she scrapishly screams in artificial agony.>Lower her luck (-10 to opponent luck)>One last fireball (1d20, Average of Three)>Launch all the fireballs (7d20, Lowest of Three)
Rolled 5 (1d20)>>37580803>One last fireball (1d20, Average of Three)
>>37580803>Lower her luck
>>37580803>Lower her luck (-10 to opponent luck)Stay down yea golden floozie!
>>37580827>>37580863Wiggling your wingers at the approaching construct, you shout, "Haramtekni: Msybahfyant!"At the core of your being, you can feel your essence work its way into the Mimic. That Mimic's going to have a hell of a time trying to eat you!However, while you're busy doing your thing, she swipes at you, dealing you...>Rolled 1d13 = 7Zero Damage! But she did pull that chain some, sending you into a moaning fit as you writhe around on the ground some, massaging the pain from your tits.>BURN HER! (Roll 1d20)>Write-in
>>37581135>BURN HER! (Roll 1d20)Stay down ya hussy!
Rolled 2 (1d20)>>37581135>BURN HER!
Rolled 13 (1d20)>>37581198>>37581135
Rolled 5 (1d20)>>37581135BURURURURURURURURUN
>>37581209After collecting yourself, you let loose a gout of flame up at the golden woman! The exertion makes you feel a little tired...>13Your fire.It does NOTHING!After standing in the way of your cone of fire for a moment, your opponent dodges to the side, and flings her breast at you!You are pounded with a barrage of coins and gems!>(HP = (7/13))You better finish this soon, or else there's going to be a time paradox.>GIANT FIREBALL! (Roll 1d20, Best of Four)>Present anus.>Run away!>Write-in
Rolled 11 (1d20)>>37581491>GIANT FIREBALL!
Rolled 1 (1d20)>>37581491>GIANT FIREBALL! (Roll 1d20, Best of Four)
Rolled 7 (1d20)>>37581491
Rolled 18 (1d20)>>37581491>Present anus.
>>37581611Why vote for something and roll for another option?
>>37581725Might've forgotten to take the dice off?
>>37581725Forgot to remove dice.But hey, now I'm voting to present anus with gusto!
>>37581772'kay. You're outnumbered in a ratio of 2:1:1. You mind if I use your roll in the post?
>>37581830Hunh, it's best of four. I didn't notice, thought my roll was irrelevant.By all means take it
>>37581511>>37581535>>37581555>>37581611Backing away from the Mimic, you bring up your hands as if you were cradling the air, and start channeling flame through your palms.>11The fire is beginning to form a sphere, a sphere that's growing bigger and bigger the more you stand here giving it enerGUH>1You are punched hard in the gut by an airborne fist of glittering metal! The attack makes you stumble forward, and you trip on a root. Figures.>7Oh hey, the fireball's ready!You toss the meter-wide ball towards the golden, fanged lady before you hit the ground. The Mimic, caught off guard from giggling at your fall, is right in the way of your attack! As soon as she notices the ball of fiery death sailing towards her at the impressive speed of 5879 kmph while leaving soot and singe in its wake, she attempts to dodge out of the way.>18Too little, too late! The blast impacts against the lady with a FWUMP. The Mimic is engulfed in your wrathful flames, and screams as she melts down!>Cont.
>>37588285As the molten lady's body collapses and liquefies from the intense heat, you busy yourself with collecting the golden coins she threw at you that are flailing about on the ground wildly. You even find a ruby!With the coins stacked in a wobbly pillar that you balance in one hand, you turn back to the puddle of gold to see that the fire has died down. The puddle is shifting about, squirming. Eventually, a face appears in it, one with tusks, and an emerald and a sapphire for the eyes. It looks at you with a peeved expression, and sticks out its tongue!One by one, the coins in the pillar you're holding fly off into the air and circle around you like a horde of bees. One of the coins flings itself at you, and hits you on the horn! You stumble backwards, and fall on your butt.The mimic laughs bubbly as she takes the form of a little girl and slides toward you, the puddle of gold trailing after her. She looms over you menacingly, licking her hot, shiny lips with the tip of her tongue.One of the coins from before lands on you, and slides up to your nipple, where it starts vibrating! More coins do the same with other zones on your body, like your armpit, your two horns on the side of your head, your forehorn, your long pointy ears, and several buzz along your rapidly-hardening dick.You try to scoot away and raise a hand, readying up to blast her in her still-glowing face. She catches your hand with one of her own, and your hand sinks into her hot, molten fleshmetal. She secures your other arm as well, wrapping and trapping it in a golden hand...cuff.Coins that were previously flying through the air join together to form a pillar, which descends down towards your clenching bum.The gold pillar presses against your asshole firmly, not giving any restraint. The Mimic smiles a sharp-toothy smile at you as the pillar penetrates through you. When it's rooted deep inside your rectum, the pillar starts vibrating!>Cont.
>>37589674"Gaaahhh~!" you moan whorishly as the coins work their magic on you."Uuhuehuehuehuehue!" the girl laughs as you squirm underneath her much like she had done in your flames just moments ago.Right, your flames."Haramtekni: Narharrkajahannam!" you shout, letting loose as much heat as you can through your fingers. Your hand slips out of hers, and some gold drips off. The Mimic hisses at you, and then reforms her hand into a fist, which hits your face with a wet smash, knocking you flat. The buzzing intensifies as she guides your leaking dick skyward with some coins. Now why on Earth would she do that?Her gleaming sex descends onto your own, molten gold dripping down onto your white pubes. The coins leave you alone as you enter her tight, hot folds."Aaaaahhhbrbrbrbr," the Mimic sighs as she sinks down onto you. After you're buried in her metallic vagina, she starts to move. She grinds her tiny hips against you as she leans down to give you a nice, wet lick with that long tongue of hers. With all the pleasure she's giving you, you can't help but have your own tongue lolling out, which she attacks. You both moan as your tongues inter coil, and she explores all of your mouth with the tip while she bounces on top of you like a well-oiled machine. While the two of you tonguebattledominance, you notice her toying and pinching a bright, white pearl atop her pussy."AAAAHH~!" you moan as you erupt inside her. Your jizz lubes her up a bit, which is pretty good because she was getting a bit dry... Wait, dry?The tusked golden girl lets out a moan that echoes throughout the forest, probably some nice pipes she has there. Her motions slow down as she gets closer and closer to reaching her peak. With one last grind, she arches her back, and lets out a high-pitched shriek."HIIIIIIIIII~" she moans, "~IIIIIIggkkk!?"...You poke her with your free hand, and find that her once flexible skin is now hard and firm, yet smooth.>Cont.
>>37590667The Mimic's tongue licks her body in confusion, poking and prodding at the new-found toughness of her flesh. You hear her grunt in frustration as she tries to move anything besides her tongue. The only ambulatory thing is her hand on her diamond clit, which she uses to shove herself off of you. The mimic falls off of you, relieving you of her massive weight, though she jerks you with her hand that's still stuck on your wrist. She's frozen in that pose with her hand clenched in a quivering fist, and that look of pleasure on her face.You free yourself with a blowtorch, laughing at the stationary girl. You notice some of your cum leaking out of her, which you lap up before it hits the ground. As you continue to eat her out, she moans and toys with her pearl again, and you note that you're up to go a second round.So you do.----------YOU are ASHLEIGH FIGHTMASTER II, and after you carry the unconscious Nina back to where Trid and the Mimic are, you are surprised to see him joyously thrusting his dick in and out of a... golden statue of a little girl surrounded by a puddle of gold. Its long pink tongue is lolling out.Trideag smiles up at you and says, "Oh, hi! I melted her down, and she took this shape before she solidified. Now she can't move!""Neat," you say.>Join in (fuck Trideag)>Join in (fuck statue tongue)>Get a move on, we've had enough smut for now (But help Trid finish)>What should you do with the statue girl?
>>37591968>Join in (fuck statue tongue)Maybe get Trid to warm her so she can move of use a fire? Failing that drag her along to get sold to someone.
>>37591968Reposting: >>37562957Slice and dice her!
>>37592093>>37592441>>37594395You disrobe, and Trid calls out to you, "Aye wudn't touch her, if'n aye was yew. She's hot enough to bake a potaytoe on."After feeling the hot air surrounding the statue, you nod, and eye its long, drooling tongue instead. You reach out to grab it, and it dodges away and slaps you in the face. With a growl, you lean down and grab near the tongue's steaming base, guiding the resisting muscle to your impatient member.The warm, wet tongue slides along your shaft, then again, and again. Soon, you don't even need to use your hands.The Mimic takes to her task somewhat eagerly, teasing the slit with the tip of her tongue, and moving all around the head. The juicy tongue then starts coiling around your shaft! It feels pretty good.The tip of her tongue is now working on your balls, licking them like they were a pair of suckers. You then imagine her biting down impatiently on a sucker, which is all too easy with those teeth of hers.You are distracted from bad thoughts when her tongue wraps itself around your sack, and moves past it to your quivering pucker.When the tip teases your asshole, you involuntarily thrust forward. Your dick rubs against the moist coil of her tongue, welling up the pressure in your balls a bit. Seeing your reaction, she starts poking her tongue inside you. Thanks to Trid's attentions earlier, you're a very welcoming host, unclenching your ass to allow her to worm her way inside you.You moan as the golden girl works you with her tongue, sliding around your shaft, tightening against your balls, and fucking up your ass. With a glance, you see Trideag bury his green, bedazzled dick inside the statue and grunt, only to withdraw and lie on his back, panting and wet-dicked. Soon enough, you reach your limit as well, but to your surprise, the Mimic coils around you tightly, preventing you from climaxing! She also pulls you down to her hot mouth with her tongue!>Cont.
>>37598990Almost losing your balance, you quickly plant your claymore in the ground, stabilizing yourself. The Mimic lowers you with her tongue to where your pulsing dick is just mere inches above her permanently agape, toothy mouth. Then, she relents.You explode into her mouth with a groan, white hot jism bursting out of your head into her even hotter mouth. As soon as the baby batter lands in her oven-like cake-hole, you can hear it sizzling, curdling, and boiling the next instant. The scent of billions of burning unborn half-babies wafts up to your nose, but you're beyond caring, there's only pleasure flooding your senses as her silken tongue coils around you, tightens against your balls, and milks that zone deep within your tight ass.You shoot so much into her steaming gullet that it overflows, spilling out on to her golden cheeks, singing as it travels towards the ground. You cry out as she drags her tongue out of your ass and uncoils from your dick, darting this way and that to mop up your spunk. She even catches it midair with that nimble muscle of hers! (Tongues are muscles, right?)You sit on the ground, panting from the heat as well as being milked like that. Her tongue leans over to lick your penis one more time, dragging one last spurt of jizz out of you.You look over to your friend, and say, "So, um... We gotta... Go West, right?"He smiles at you, and says, "Sure, we can go rest for a bit.""Whatever, 'kay."The two of you then take a nap next to the tongued statue.
>>37601850While you rest for a while, you hear Nina stirring, so you crawl over to her and grip her by the ankles before she gets another bright idea. Your wounds from before when she shot you with those sling-bullets are still raw, even with the help of your salving saliva."Oi, uh, Red?" Trideag calls to you, scratching his head as he looks down at the golden girl.Huh, that's right. You haven't introduced yourself to Trid yet. "My name's actually Max Hanzo Ashleigh Fightmaster the Second, but you can call me Ash for short.""I call you a murderer, rapist, and demon!" Nina shouts at you. You grab her by the hair, and put a hand over her mouth."Okay!" he says, "So, what shud we do about dis gold lass? She can move metal, make it float raun an' junk, but it seems she canny move raun that much when she's a big hunk of gold."Hrmmmm...You hand Nina's curly hair over to Trideag, and bring down your sword on the golden girl's neck, decapitating her. Nina and Trid are rendered speechless by your action. The tongue pokes and licks at the girl's exposed neck cavities.Continuing to sever the Mimic's limbs and joints with your blade, you eventually finish your work, leaving the Mimic laying on the ground in bits and pieces. The next instant, the pieces fly up into the air in a wild circle, eventually settling down as all the pieces combine together to form that little girl again. Pffft, she still has that O-face molded on!Trid throws a fireball at Mimic's face, letting her close her mouth. She settles on a cute little smirk with her tongue sticking out."Now since I freed you, I need you to imprison this bitch," you say to the creature while jerking a thumb over at Nina. The Mimic nods her assent, and flies over to Nina, placing floating hands and feet near Nina's own. Nina eyes the flying metal head with trepidation as it looms near her own.The Mimic licks Nina across the face.>What do you call this golden girl?
1 = Goldie2 = BoxieFINAL DESTINATION, GO!
>>37602643>>37603295Man I am so lost. I'd better get caught up. Totally hosting tomorrow though, you've been at it for a while.
>>37603400oh, thank baby jeebus
>>37603419>>37603400Will we ever play as Aya?
>>37603605Ask Ninnius if you see him.
>>37579742I GUESS WALLACE
>>37603842YOU GUESS RIGHT
"From now on, your name is..." you ponder for a while, before settling on, "Goldie!"The mimic accepts her new name with a nod, and picks Nina up and sets the girl on her own two legs.Trideag says to you all, "Well, let's be off den?"You nod, but quickly notice something, mainly that Trideag's hand is bleeding."Wait, Trid, you're hurt! Lemme see that...""Oh, this? It's nothing, I've had wor- oh!" he grunts as you start licking his punctured hand. As your saliva takes effect, he practically melts from the intimacy of the action. Speaking of beings that melt, Goldie's head swoops down to Trideag's bum, and stares at it real hard for some reason.The next instant, Trid jerks upright, and grunts in pain! You then see several golden coins are flying through the air behind him, which are then caught by Goldie's tongue, and swallowed. She licks Trid's blushing face afterwards.Nina kinda stares at all of you like she's in a nightmare she can't wake up from.----------The four of you eventually come to the west edge of the woods, with Trid riding on your back and Goldie monitoring Nina, though the sun's setting when you clear the forest.As you leave the woods, you can spot a speck of blue in the orange sky heading towards a mountain that's far off in the distance.Trideag points to the left of the mountain, saying, "Oi believe me captain is over in dat direcshun.">Head to Mountain>Head to Captain
>>37606118>Head to Captain
>>37606118>Give Captain head
>>37606118>Head to MountainI just gotta know what that bird's all about.
You consider following after that bluebird some more. But then again, that would be betraying Trid's trust in you, and you feel kinda bad for him. He has some people who are waiting for him some place. Not you, though. You're just a fish out of water. So why is your curiosity more important than his need?The four of you head off towards the southwest, ignoring that mountain entirely. Though as you do so, you hear a loud, insistent cawing echoing from the mountain. You shake your head at that, and give Trid's butt a squeeze, earning an even tighter hug from him.>You prioritize your friends over yourself! +10 to party interaction junk (Slaves aren't your friends, though).----------The hunter watches their prey leave the forest. They were too late in catching up to them in the forest, but all they have to do now is follow them from a afar, and wait til night falls. Then, when they are asleep, that is when they'll meet their doom!-------------Done, done, done. For now.Vote on which character to play as the next time I run shit (poorly):>Yumi the Cyborg Angel>Usagi the Criminal Police Officer>SHOGUN KYU>Romulus the Undying>Marko the Soldier of Fortune>Hando the Neo-Nazi>New character! fuckoff I'll try, but don't pick this one
>>37609630>Yumi the Cyborg Angel
>>37609630>>New character! fuckoff I'll try, but don't pick this oneAya
>>37613306Are you the guy who REALLY wants Aya to fuck Elias?
>>37613306Aya is in Ninnius's hands anon, try again.>>37613364I'm betting he is. Joke's on him They are on other sides of the world from each other, and have no reason to find each other.
>>37603400Where'd you leave off? Did you skip over the builder?
working on a drawing, it'll be done in a few
Bump for something.
>>37609630>Yumi the Cyborg AngelDammit. I hope we see that bird again.
>>37625823No, it's your mom.
>>37625987My mom's in a wheelchair and can't swing a sword to save anyone life. Good pic of my little brother though.
>>37626298Sorry Anonymous, I didn't know.
Hey, we should make a twitter for this.
>>37628387Sure. How would that work?
>>37630301Well, elect one guy to post links to the threads on twitter?
>>37632874I'll do it.Hey Tennant, you still up to bat, or should I run for a little bit more?
>>37634964Yo. I can host in about an hour and a half.>>37628387I've got a Twitter, but it's mostly for Civ Quests.
>>37634979Glad to hear it!https://twitter.com/KabbalahQ
>>37635087I believe he was one of the players in the builder?
Alright fools, it's time we got Back to Basics (tm).So what I'm gonna need from you all is a name, race, profession, and a couple of creative dice.
Rolled 3, 3, 2, 4, 6, 4, 1 = 23 (7d7)>>37636551>Name: Oli Goldgrub>Race: Dwarf>Profession: Miner-Warrior
>>37636551>Name: Faeet>Race: Venusian>Profession: Runaway Princess
Rolled 11, 3 = 14 (2d14)>>37636706doh
Rolled 76 (1d100)>>37636551>Name: Ayanda>Race: African>Profession: Warlord
Rolled 4, 4, 9, 2, 3, 8, 2, 8, 9, 1 = 50 (10d10)>>37636551>Name: Destroyo the Killbot>Race: Robot that kills>Profession: Killing Machine
Rolled 19, 1, 10, 14 = 44 (4d20)>>37636551>Scruffy>White>Stoner
Writing now, no new votes will be accepted. Doing otherwise makes you a colossal faggot.
>>37636994>Name: Colossus of Rhodes>Race: Giant Statue>Profession: Sodomite
Rolled 69, 6 = 75 (2d69)>>37637038forgot my roll
You are Ayanda "Killbot" Olifae, a ruthless half-dwarven, half-Venusian and half-negro warlord of the Congo. Your rise to power was a brutal and bloody one, but you persevered (thanks in no small part to your Venusian heritage). Though 90% of your brain is devoted to killing, you have also found a love for gold and wealth. Of course, you can't be bothered to do it yourself. Now would be a good time to acquire some child slaves.>What do you do now, fool?
So is this a builder thread now?
>>37637538No, that was just chargen.>>37637519>Send scouts out to search for villages.
>>37637538Do I look like a builder to you?
>>37637519>Tentacle some children into the harem of captured women.
>>37637067>Sodomite>rolls 69kek>>37637519Let's find some children to enslave.
>>37637519>Open up a theme park with a mine-cart ride that leads to the mines.
>>37637519>Imprison the wealthy and take their stuff, as well as their children, calling them 'profligate.' Have the children work off their parents' wastefulness by working in the mines.
Rolled 96 (1d100)>>37637575>>37637608>>37637614>>37637677Rolling
>>37637807That'd be me. Anyhow, writing!
>>37637519Why aren't we a chick?
>>37637839Who says we aren't? We're part dwarf, after all.
Your raiders quickly overwhelm a nearby town, killing its defenders and imprisoning the enemies of the Revolution. The children are all apprehended, there to serve you within the mines for diamonds, gold, and the like.As they pass in chains, you offer a hearty and malevolent laugh to cement your antagonist role.
>>37638089>What now idiots?
>>37638111>Prepare to invade Angola and Tanzania at the same time.
>>37638111>Lament that we don't know who are parents are. Attend a flogging of an elderly man to cheer ourselves up!
>>37638111>How's our military right now?
>>37638111>Get in the killbot.
Rolled 77 (1d100)>>37638304>>37638245>>37638156Rollin
With the kidnapped children finally sating your lust for gold, you feel the call to war once more. The men are rallied, guns loaded and drugs taken. You personally hop into your Killbot, a monstrous machine of malevolent massacre. As you ride south into Angola, more warriors and tribes steadily fall under your banner. Though the fighting against the legions of Ape-King Bhumal is tough, you manage to carve out a swath of small territory. By the end of the month, you have nearly 4,500 troops under your command!
>>37638882I will never not forget this>What now, cockmonglers?
>>37638882Why is that you compiled all the chargens into a clusterfuck, but now you pick the actions you like the most?>>37638914>Brutally drill the men for a month and make lesser killbots to steamroll the rest of Angola.
>>37640053>Why is that you compiled all the chargens into a clusterfuckBeen done before, and Kraghammer was great.>but now you pick the actions you like the most?Much like the chargen, I try to smooth the majority into a single action. 3/4 voted for war stuff, so we did war stuff.
>>37638914>4,500? Nonsense! Draft some kids in there as well.
>>37638914>Killbot needs a drill-arm so it can tunnel.
>>37638914>Brutally drill some kids into making more killbots with our drill-arm.
>>37638914>Challenge the Ape-King Bhumal to a deathmatch, us and our entire army against him and his own.
Rolled 20, 100 = 120 (2d100)>>37645217Dagnabit!
>>37645267You requisition an entire squadron of killbots to be built, all of them smaller than yours, of course. Can't let those mongrels get any ideas that they're on the same level as you, now can you?You also get the idea that your own personal killbot needs to be able to burrow beneath the ground, partly so you can sneak behind enemies and penetrate through their rear, mostly so you can find any riches that haven't been uncovered yet. You set your best engineer to work on it, leaving just your other engineers to work on your mobilized squadron.In the meantime, you busy yourself with whipping your army into fighting shape, most of the time in a literal sense. >-100 to troops, +10 to overall troop strength!After a few weeks, you are satisfied with the results of your training, particularly with how your troops look at you with open ferocity. Feeling confident at your army's fighting prowess, you send a text over to Ape-Kong Bhumal, reading:"Hey, gonna attack you with my entire army. You up for it?">100A few minutes, you get a reply back, which reads:"Kk"Your advisors who always give you agreeable advice and praise come running into the throne room while you're giving one of your concubines the T and letting another stroke your beard.One of them tells you that Angola has just launched a liberation campaign and are storming the villages you've captured. You laugh, and tell them all what you just did."But general, the Ape-King has made a ceasefire with South Africa to come here to take back the villages we captured, as well as your head! He and his guerilla braves are all descended from gorillas! Our army will be decimated!"You respond to by shooting a tentacle into his eyeball and pulling out his brain, and telling the rest of them, "We can do totally do it. After all, I'm really strong.">CONT.
>>37647341You send the order to mobilize your forces, and speaking of which, you check out how your killbot squadron is coming along.When you get to the lot, you see several people trying to put out some flames on a scrapheap. Several other scrapheaps are piled right beside it in a line.One of you engineers jumps when they see you, and scurries over to you, saying, "Sorry, General, it just ended up like this when we turned on the ignition! The others seems just as likely to explode. They're just too damn small!"You slap the man's head all the way around, and shout at the other engineers, "Get some cave children to speed up the process! I want those killbots running by the time we head to battle!"The engineers cringe as they scurry past, nodding frantically.-------You sneer at the Ape-King's army as it marches through the jungle. You roar, "TO BATTLE!" and grin as your killbot tears through the jungle, knocking down many trees. With a shout from you, your crew fires all guns at the enemy lines, bombarding them without mercy. You hear some explosions behind you, and one of your crew informs you that the other killbots have stopped working, and some have gone up in flames, one just circles around endlessly. Oh, you are so going to flay those engineers when you return from this battle, victorious.As your vehicle knocks a tree over, you are surprised when a super muscular heavy soldier with a machete between his sharp teeth tackles you and punches you in your green, bearded mug.>What do? (Roll some creative dice)
Rolled 74, 73, 31 = 178 (3d99)>>37647705>Bellow our "WAAAAARGH">Grapple that soldier, give a strong hit to the machete to knocked out his teeth!
>>37647840This damn ape just laid his dirty paws on you! You gotta get him off of you!You wrestle the gorilla guerilla for a bit, breathing in deep to bellow out your signature,"WWAAAAAAAAARRRGHHH!"right in his smiling face.The hairy black man is stunned by your warcry, giving you plenty of opportunity to sock him one!Your tentacled fist collides with his head, knocking him away from you! However, at the last instant, he grabs hold of your tentacles, and with a turn of his head, he lops of the tips of your tentacles!The soldier dangles from your flailing tentacles in front of the still-moving killbot, withdrawing his machete from his mouth into his tough-looking fist.>What do you do now? (Roll)
Rolled 8, 5, 10, 13, 12, 2, 10 = 60 (7d13)>>37649018>Thrust our tentacles down his throat, even if he severs them he'll still be choking on them
>>37649066Seeing your foe's mouth unoccupied, you quickly lunge one tentacle into his mouth, the severed stump sliding down his tongue into the esophagus. He gags, but quickly bites down, earning a grimace from you. As he raises his sword to stab into your hand, you give him a knowing smile. The next second, he's gagging again as your severed tentacle wriggles around in his throat like a lizard's tail.Now that the ambusher is focused on vomiting and coughing up your squirmy tentacle, you feel your tentacles regrowing the tips. They're shorter now, but you can use them again.Your tentacles coil around the Angolan, leaving him at your 'mercy' for the time being.>Grinder>Drill>Turret
Rolled 116 (1d137)>>37650086>DrillWRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII
>>37650108You hold the man in place, and reach for that new joystick that was just installed. With a mechanical whirring, the killbot's drill arm comes around to point the malevolent spiky spike at him. Once you press the button atop the joy stick, the big-ass drill whirs to life, spewing exhaust from its engine as it does so. A high-pitched "WWWRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!" pierces throughout the battlefield.In response to this new threat, the guerilla brave struggles against your grip with redoubled effort, and just when he nearly manages to get free, you flick your tentacles like a whip, flinging the chump at the monstrosity of a machine.The primate's entire being is shredded to pieces and splattered everywhere. You wipe the blood off your face, and grimace as you feel it on your beard as well. Eh, at least he's dead, you think to yourself as you take a bite out of his thigh.You hear over the radio that your men are getting their asses kicked by the guerilla braves, and that the Angolan army is surging forth to take advantage of the disorganized front lines.Up ahead in the sky, you see Ape-King Bhumal flying a modded Boeing AH-64 Apache. He's flying towards you!>What do now? (roll)
Rolled 34 (1d100)>>37651934>Swap to EliasIn all seriousness though, STRIKE AT THE CROWNED MONKEY.
Rolled 8, 38, 43 = 89 (3d57)>>37651934We've got a gun, don't we? Shoot him!