Seventeen hours ago. Amsterdam. YOU ARE THE BRIT "What do you mean the Art Gallery is closed at night?" You exclaim in frustration to the museum guard, a dismayed look on your face. Your standing outside the Rijksmuseum, having left the rest of the squad to their unsavory entertainments. Despite everything, you do have an appreciation of the finer things in life. You were really looking forward to seeing the painting of the night watch..."Museum Closes at 4pm. Come back tomorrow" The guard grumbles, locking up the gallery doors and waving you away. Walking away back towards the train station, your crossing a bridge across the canal when a battered Volkswagen Beetle almost runs you over, its wing mirror clipping you and sending you tumbling down into the gutter. The Beetle comes to a screeching halt, the driver getting out and rushing over to you. You look up from the gutter just in time to see the grinning face of Van Doorn. > Fuck this. Into the Canal> Oh god not again...
>>36327550> Fuck this. Into the Canal hi dent,>your >your >your, only one of the three is right~
>>36327550So normally I'd have filtered quest, but you somehow sneaked past the filter.Anyhow, I noticed you talking shit about my country, so I'll be lurking here to call you out for any innacuracies or cultural ethnocentrism pertaining to the Dutch.For starters, the Rijksmuseum is a museum, not an art gallery. Learn the difference, art galleries have a commercial purpose. Also, the Rijksmuseum closes at 17:00 during the week and is closed on mondays.
>>36327550>> Oh god not again...>>36327668>Anyhow, I noticed you talking shit about my country, so I'll be lurking here to call you out for any innacuracies or cultural ethnocentrism pertaining to the Dutch.Stop being such a fag
>>36327730>Stop being such a fagNo. So anyway, this guy who gets out of the car has ill intentions, while in the middle of De Walen, the red light district of Amsterdam? Because that's where you are if you walk from the Rijksmuseum to the Station.What this means is, it's filled with cops, organized crime and witnesses. Good luck with that.
>>36327550> Fuck this. Into the Canal
oh god not again
>oh god not again
>>36327550>> Fuck this. Into the Canal
>>36327668> I noticed you talking shit about my countryWhat?>the Rijksmuseum is a museum, not an art galleryHmm let's see here.>>36327550>You exclaim in frustration to the museum guard>"Museum Closes at 4pm. It's almost like the only one who got the statement wrong was the tourist? Gosh, how strange(!)>>36327550> Fuck this. Into the Canal
>>36328055>"Museum Closes at 4pm. Come back tomorrow" The guard grumblesIt's quite amazing how unable you are to read. Do they use you to test the legibility of twilight novels?
>>36327668Whoa, we have an autistic Dutchman aboard. Awesome!Keep up the God's work Anon.>>36327550>Oh God, not again...
>>36328226>Keep up the God's work Anon.>the god'sWe're a predominantly protestant, though in practice atheist, country. Assuming you're Dutch, I'll take the plural denomination of god as a joke toward the Dutch tendency to split churches over the slightest theological dispute?
>>36328263That was singular bro.
>>36328276>That was singular>>36328226>Keep up the God'sIf it wasn't a misspelt plural, then it is simply retarded. "keep up the god is work"?
>>36327550> Fuck this. Into the Canal.Realizing that seeing Van Doorn here can be nothing but bad news, you make a break for the canal, diving over the side of the bridge and diving into the water below. A couple seconds later, you break the surface and start swimming towards a conveniently placed ladder. Van Doorn, doesn't seem phased at all by your bid for freedom, sauntering over to the side of the bridge, casually tossing his cigar into the water."You know, that's not going to work... Dave. All yours"Its at the moment you reach the ladder, just in time to see Dave's face at the top of it. With an Arc Thrower. When you come to your tied to some sort of car seat with a bag on your head, with the radio playing fortunate son, and what sounds like Van Doorn singing the lyrics next to you. > What is it this time?> Why did you kidnap me?> You didn't clean the bag...
>>36328299Yes, you are right. It was a mistake - the apostrophe should not have been there.Carry on.
>>36328305>What is it this time?
>>36328299>If it wasn't a misspelt plural, then it is simply retarded. "keep up the god is work"?"'s" indicates possession in English. Sally's = belongs to Sally/Sally is depending on context
>>36328305>> You didn't clean the bag...
>>36328305> What is it this time?
>>36328305>start swimming towards a conveniently placed ladder.Autist here - it's unlikely there would be a ladder. Drowning is a serious issue for people who fall in canals in Amsterdam. It's why we have a section of police dedicated to patrolling the canals and responding to reports of people falling in canals.Meaning the cops are on the way, my friend.
>>36328917Presumably the ladder has been placed there by Dave in expectations of our shenanigans.
>>36328305>Why did you kidnap me?Who does this guy think we are, the Chinaman?
>>36328305> what is it this time?"A bit of extra-curricular activity. Off the books." He responds, turning the music down as the car goes into a sharp bend. "So what is it you want me to do..." you ask as the car comes to a halt. "The Laundry Cleared you with standard equipment right?" he asks, ignoring your question. You nod"Good. We're having you steal a tank.""What!?" "We need it for something later. There is a hand of glory in the back""I don't know how to drive a tank? I worked a desk!" you protest as he removes the bag, finally enabling you to breathe air that doesn't stink of vomit. "You don't have to, Just put this flash drive into the battle management computer and the rest will fix itself..." At that, he unbinds your limbs and pushes you out of the car. Going to the back seat, you grab the dissected hand of glory, trying your best not to think about its origins. Before he drives off, you ask him one final question> Why do we even need a tank?> Why is this off the books?> How do you know about the Laundry?
>>36329268>"the fuck am i supposed to do with this?" while pointing at the hand
>>36329268>we need you to steal a tankHAH! Joke's on you, the Dutch Army doesn't have any tanks anymore.Fucking budget cuts.
>>36329356well, fuck, i'm sure Dave won't buy that hmm, is there something like a war memorial where we could find one or something?
>>36329356>the Dutch Army doesn't have any tanks anymore.Who says it's a dutch tank? We've been knocked out and thrown into the back of a car for an undetermined amount of time. There's no telling where we are now.
>>36329486Well Belgian tanks are shit, so German then? Good luck getting through the Panzergrenadiers. If it were the Dutch, I'd think you have a chance, with our shit army. The germans are much too efficient.>>36329394>in a war memorialWhat do you think we are, Russians? Brits? We don't even have tanks in our musea! Now, battleships and submarines, that's a different story.
>>36329545you're maybe forgetting France...Leclerc tank and all...
>>36329268Is that flash drive with Elisa's personality?>Why is this off the books?
>>36329596well last time we saw her Elisa was installed on a shiv, so it could be her or her little sister, maybe?
>>36329637How would AI's multiply anyway? Just copying contents of their memory banks feels like cheating. And maybe mother nature has a plot device in place to prevent the same sapience to occupy two places at once, like uncertainty principle? (i.e. act of scanning for purpose of copying would destroy the original)...
>>36329268>Why is this off the books?"Lets just say that not everyone at X-COM is who they appear to be. Some of us have been part of the fight for a hell of a lot longer than others." With that final message he hands you a flash drive and drives off down the road, leaving you standing in the middle of the road. Clutching the severed hand, you make your way down in the opposite direction to the way Van Doorn left, soon encountering a military checkpoint. The Checkpoint is bordered by a chain link fence, with a small guard shack next to the road. Out front, with the traffic barrier, are two relaxed looking soldiers with soft caps and bullpup rifles. "Just where the hell did he leave me..." you mutter to yourself, recognizing that the troops are talking to each other in what sounds like French.> 5 Hand of Glory uses left. > D20 get past the checkpoint
Rolled 2 (1d20)>>36329717j'aime le frommage
>>36329573Since when do we share a border with France? And you must have been out for a brain damaging amount of time for you to be able to cross Belgium unconscious.
Rolled 9 (1d20)>>36329717>Hello good day
Rolled 7 (1d20)>>36329717samefagging a roll, because jolly good day, wonderful weather we're having, isn't it? Oh, is that tank yours? Mind if I borrow it for a ride? No? Thank you.
>>36329717> Interest seems to have dropped off for today so I'm going to call it for tonight. I'll update on twitter when I'll continue. https://twitter.com/LWQ_Dent
>>36330271Cheers for the thread OP
>>36330271Just got here, but thanks for running anyway. Polish autist gave me no end of laughs either, can we keep him?
>>36330271But I just got here ;_;I personally reckon you need to use a single picture for each thread, something easy to spot, like what Herr whatshisname did for LSQ (I do recall that picture changing as threads went on, but you get the general gist)People like familiarity, and they'll be more likely to return to the threads