File: bigboss.jpg (143 KB, 800x1000)

143 KB JPG

>The AI used to belong to a battleship
>In fact it belonged to several dozen battleships over the last few centuries
>It's nothing short of a legend at this point. If you can name a war, chances are it was there

File: 1000px-Marauder.jpg (51 KB, 1000x625)

51 KB JPG

> The ship's main drives are advanced gravitics. It can fly under any circumstances imaginable, and damage sufficient to destroy the engines is more than it would take to destroy the rest of the ship.
>> The ship still has sleek, cool-looking wings, though. They make it much more maneuverable in-atmosphere, whilst most ships tend to become ponderous and difficult in thick atmo.

> Every cabin has an AI module installed in it. The AI module, in addition to functioning as a personal secretary for all crew stationed in those cabins, also has a powerful psychological modeling program, and is programmed for interaction.
>> The net result, whilst possibly striking some more privacy-minded crew as Orwellian, is that everyone on the ship has their own personal secretary, fully-attentive to their needs.
>>> Just got off a grueling shift? Good thing the shower-bath's already warmed up and everything you need for a long, relaxing soak is laid out for you.
>>> Need to get up early and no way around it? Wake up to a hot cup of steaming coffee, just the way you like it.
>>> Never forget an important date/anniversary/appointment again.
>>> Bored? Your CabinMate can recommend new literature, hobbies, games, or diversions, suggest you might try socializing with other shipmates or passengers whom it predicts you'll get along well with/find shared interests with, or simply keep your attention with a long chat.
>>> Stress starting to get to you? Your CabinMate will know before you do, and can take steps to ease it.

> The ship's life support is fully customizable, compartment-by-compartment.
>> Ever wanted to try sleeping on the ceiling in a slightly oxygen-rich atmosphere while your room is filled with dense, billowy smoke lit by ultraviolet light? Go for it.

>>36308425
The galley bit isn't unlikely. Submarine crews get the best food in the fleet... to help keep their minds off being trapped in a tiny metal tube under a billion tons of water. I mean if you have a crew that isn't hibernating, and you have the tech to synthesize all the nutrients people need... why not make it taste good?

>The ship has a clone of it's home planet's entire internet on local storage, including stuff behind pay walls, scientific data, and so on.
>The crew has unlimited access to multiple lifetimes of entertainment, porn, and education. After a few years aboard ship, the assistant life support tech has finished several degrees in the humanities, and occasionally books speaking engagements at academic conferences while planetside.

The ship used to serve as a broadcasting station for some rebel insurrection. It comes equipped with the best long-range and short-range communications suite available, as well as a really powerful broadcasting system.

After the insurgency, the ship was badly damaged and had to be hastily repaired. This resulted in the broadcasting system to be somehow connected with the advanced cyberwarfare suite.

The ship is now capable of hacking into enemy communications and systems via the broadcast channel, and is capable of driving the crew of opposing ships insane with never-ending loops of horrible music.

File: 1312180839022.jpg (384 KB, 1600x1236)

384 KB JPG

Its an out-of-production workhorse model and showing its age. But you know what? Somebody really cared about comfort. While not luxurious, the chairs and beds are damn fine, the decor is pleasant and the entertainment console has a lifetime subscription to SpaceNetflix.

The fuel gauge has been hacked. From the bridge it shows an accurate readout of how much gas you've got left in the tank. From the view of the dock crews? Tweaked to show you're drawing less fuel than they're giving you. It's more than paid itself off over the last six months.

The ship's previous owner registered it to some great maintenance service plan. Free checkups and deeply discounted basic maintenance at most ports.

Best damn anti-breach safeguards you've ever seen. If she's venting atmo you don't have to worry about suddenly breathing the black or losing a limb to a sudden bulkhead seal.

It's an outdated military frigate that's being sold as surplus. A few bribes here and there and the main guns can be restored to functionality with relative ease.

File: 1264814889478.jpg (72 KB, 634x500)

72 KB JPG

> The inertial dampening field is top-notch, and variable not only compartment-to-compartment, but within compartments as well.
>> The IDF can be configured as an anti-boarding mechanism, able to nonlethally restrain hostiles to the floor/walls/ceiling... Or smash them against the nearest sturdy bulkhead/the ceiling hard enough to invoke the chunky salsa rule.
>> The IDF is also capable of allowing the crew to withstand the most violent and insane maneuvers the pilot can put the ship through, without so much as causing a ripple in their tea... But also dialing itself smartly back enough for the pilot's senses of momentum to come into play, enhancing his ability to pilot without endangering him.

> The ship came equipped with a top-notch team of astromech droid mechanics.
>> These droids are practically capable of operating the ship by themselves.
>> They're definitely capable of maintaining and repairing the ship by themselves, even in combat, under heavy fire, on the hull without shields.

> The ship was designed with the twin precepts of "Reliability" and "Modularity" at the forefront.
>> As a result, the ship will fly forever if it has a mechanic that's even half-awake.
>> Acquiring replacement part is relatively easy and cheap, as the modularity of the design leads it to have a significant parts commonality even on vessels which are quite new. Knock-offs are also cheaply available, though their reliability should be considered questionable at best.
>> Ease of repair and maintenance, whilst not at the forefront, are also honorable mentions in the ship's design philosophy. It's not quite as simple that any airspeeder mechanic can put it back together in his garage, but it's close.

>The bunk space is twice the size as advertised for some reason and each crewmen, from rating to captain, gets his own room and ensuite.

>The ship is infested by a strange life-form that is in none of the databanks.
>It never comes out of the ducts, makes the occasional noise and is rarely seen even on camera.
>But every vent in the ship is dry and clean after it passes.
>A new crewmen once tried to kill it until the entire environmental department threatened to make sure he cleaned every duct by hand for the length of his stay.

>Dead Sexy: the ship is one of the few models that came out when the Navy tried to cover its black budget with ship construction costs, and got audited by the central government. The Navy brass had to follow through on its "Style of Substance" design projects. Its internals are well laid out and organized, but there was an inordinate amount of effort and money spent on making the ship look great, inside and out.

>For some reason, the ship doesn't have that normal dank, stuffy spaceship smell. Instead, it kinda smells like cinnamon, with maybe a hint of apple. You have no idea why, but it's nice.

>>36308425
It is a happy ship. Even a whipping captain will turn to happiness as the best basis of voyaging.

>Due to a quirk in the engine's cooling system, the lavatory near the engine room is always at a very comfortable temperature. No frozen asses in the morning on this ship.

>>36317114

I like this one. It's nice without being ridiculously nice

>The last owner of the ship forgot to empty the vast collection of intergalactic pornography hidden throughout the ship.

>The ships IFF is an older model that hasn't been replaced with the rest of the ship. The ship used to be a government couriers so it gets an automatic jump to the front of the fueling lines.

>>36317146
The engineer also claims you can make decent toast if you know the right place, but nobody's willing to put that to the test.

>>36317112
This is just magic rather than a quirk, though.

>>36317304
Some of the negative quirks were magic too. They just got buried under the massive piles of people making shit up.

>Maybe it's because you're so used to this ship, but the constant background droning of the ship's systems has a quite calming effect, to the point where you find it hard to sleep without hearing it's hum.

>>36317377
True, but that doesn't make it any less magic. Trying to think of small, subtle things (you know, quirks) is much more interesting than just "THIS SHIP HAS AAAAALL THE LAZORS!", anyway.

>>36317410
Well, the negative quirks were often

"We have a random thirteenth deck that isn't on the plan, is larger than the entire ship, spits out weird noises and anyone who goes in never comes out."

So, keeping it to low quirk level is a little hard.

I'll try though.

File: SAN check.webm (1.32 MB, 702x480)

1.32 MB WEBM

>>36311745
>Submarine crews get the best food in the fleet
Friend of my father worked in subs in 50s and 60s. Their food crates were marked as "Rejected by California prison system" or some such.

>>36317450
Fuck me.
What's the sauce on that webm?

>>36317443
It's not hard, it's just a little bit more challenging. Which is what makes it fun, and the result is more rewarding since you came up with something more interesting and easy to relate to than space ghosts.

What's the whole appeal of these quirks anyway: by giving spaceships details like many real vehicles, buildings etc have, you make them feel more real. Which is why noisy vents are better than WOOO, HAAAAUNTEEED SPAAACESHIIIP!

>>36317542
True.


Here's another shot.


>The ships AI self identifies as female.
>Normally this is just for identification purposes, but she occasionally gets sulky if the ship gets dirty.
>Keeping it clean however gets the crew extra attention to small details that is more than worth the effort of a little extra maintenance.

The ship's arboretum is entirely hydroponic; this saves on weight. It also means you're constantly producing potatoes.

The galley has a zero-g deep fryer.

The crew is happy.

>The walls and floors are more soundproof than on most ships. This allows for more privacy than you'd expect on a spaceship crammed with people living this close together, and has kept the crew from getting sick of each other more than once.

>>36317638
Eh, it's definitely a move in the right direction.

>>36317638
Becomes hostile once a month when the oil is change.

>You keep finding loose change of various intergalactic currencies under the seat cushions. Not a whole lot, and some of it is probably yours anyway, but it's still nice.

>>36317676
Like I said, I'm not the greatest.


>>36317693
Now anon, we know that AI's aren't filled with weird biological quirks like that.

Besides that one is almost too easy.

>>36317736
You're far from the worst, either. I say keep it up.

Now try writing one that's almost mundane. Something that could probably happen on a boat or in a car or something, but now it's happening in a spaceship. It's a fun exercise.

>One of the service drones is irrevocably malfunctioning
>Following his directive of 'keeping the ship in order', he is constantly returning lost or stolen objects to their owners, as long as they are still on the ship.
>This has led to many reclaimed socks, and has righted the wrong of snack thefts from the fridge

The Fabricator
>The ship has a low energy/resolution automated fabricator able to produce common items from cheap light metals and chemical feed-stocks. While the clothing, tools and spare parts it makes aren't of exceptional quality they can be produced on demand and make it easy to keep the ship flying, as long as nothing that requires high energy to produce or machine, or higher resolution then 50 manometers for tolerances.

>>36317775
>The docking clamp is of the same generic model as half the galaxy, but for whatever reason is quite a bit louder than most.
>Nothing is wrong with it, it just seals loudly.
>You've been with the ship so long that you find yourself checking most of the others to make sure they sealed correctly, the clunk yours makes is your signal, not the lights on the door.

When exiting FTL a large amount of ice forms on the Kitchen Portcullis, a previous chef rigged up a system to collect the ice and use it for cocktails, The ice is surprisingly sweet.

>>36317798
This one is great, but potentially disastrous for smugglers and space pirates.

>>36317839
See, this one was good. It feels homey, in a way. You're not bad at this.

>>36317873
>The bridge is slightly smaller than most models.
>It's not cramped, but it's not as spacious as some models.
>Overall it makes the crew feel more at ease because they're close enough to sense their fellows, but far enough away to do their jobs.

>Maybe its the temperature, vibrations from the engine, or something in the liquid oxygen but for whatever reason you come out of cryosleep feeling well rested instead of nauseous and groggy.

>The meal fabricators have been hacked with an option for "paul's kickin coffee mix". It's not quite the real thing, but it's still pretty damn good.

>One of the previous engineers must've wanted an extra hand, because someone installed rail mounted manipulator arms throughout the ship and slaved them to a rudimentary AI. It's even been programmed to bring the captain breakfast in bed, and speaks like an English butler.

The engine causes a soft vibration to shake a certain corner of the above room. The crew have even found an old-style reclining armchair just for that corner.

>The ship has emergency lockers in every compartment with yellow and black markings. They are supposed to hold a first aid kit, fire extinguisher, emergency breathing gear, radio and firearm, but many contain different things.

>The one in the captain's cabin has 47 cans of 99% ethanol and two cans of soda.

A previous Engineer spent a lot of time turning a spare cupboard into a premium holiday spot, it contains the comfiest chair in the ship and a vid-screen with almost every known fiction novel saved somewhere, only 2-3 other people know about it and keep it well stocked with food and drink for when they need a break.

>The ship was a proof of concept design for an Orion Engine
>Propulsion can sometimes be finnicky, but at the same time your engines are more or less indestructible
>If anyone ever shoots any missiles or explosives at you, you point your pusher plate at them and laugh

>The ship is a converted kinetic kill missile
>Because of this the front is about as armored as they come and has lots of ablative junk metal on top of that


>The ship's previous owner was serious about fitness, and threw in a plethora of gym equipment for a pittance. This includes a trainer droid which is not only capable of calculating routines and meal plans for you based on your body type, but also capable of sparring and providing encouragement


>The ship's water reclamation systems are actually a series of pools of varying water quality. To keep morale up the captain has opened some of the cleaner pools before the final sanitization cycle as swimming pools to the crew
>There's even a hot tub pool

Second hand
>The ship was decorated and outfitted from second-hand shops and thrift stores. All furniture, bedding, mess kit and minor items are mismatched and somewhat old, though the couches in the lounge are very comfortable despite being quite ugly.

>The ships AI likes to watch TV with the crew when it is not busy, It enjoys the act of watching with other people more than just watching the shows.
>There is a feeling of camaraderie between the crew and AI because of this
>The AI always has the best jokes about bad shows, but will always wait to see if some-one else wanted to make a joke first.

>Instead of the typical 'dust burning in a heater' smell most ships have, the ship has the pleasant 'homey' smell of an old car or a best friend's house

>The ships composite hull causes the common small pieces of space debris one drives through to sound like rain on a tin roof.

>Ship AI developed a personality bug. There are fresh baked goods every morning and every Christmas you find a new sweater under the tree.

>Bathroom never smells thanks to that hull breach.

>The ship's targeting and tracking equipment is an early first run model, acquiring marks 0.7 seconds faster than the standard production model.

An uncorrectable defect in the environmental system leaves the ship at a chilly 11 degrees at all times. Luckily, it is well stocked with knit sweaters and blankets, while the primary recreation room has a old heater that provides a warm glow.

>The previous captain was a bit of a pervert, as such the AI has a wide variety of female voices to choose from.
>After the incident with a previous Engineer and one of the robotic arms ALL of the voices that could be perceived as sensual have been removed, leaving only the 'Motherly' voice module
>The crew no longer shirks responsibilities for fear of 'Disappointing her'
>monthly maintenance costs have halved as the slight increase in upkeep has stopped many problems from forming.

>>36317524
game called Diluvion. Don't think its out yet. website: http://www.arachnidgames.com/

>>36308425

A variant on the good food one:

The cook several voyages back was also studying to be an organic chemist. Oddly, this did not result in one of the general-purpose food synthesizers being hacked to produce alcohol, nicotine, tetrahydrocannabinol, or assorted phenethylamines. Instead the synthesizers were fine-tuned to the point where the synth-steak, normally tasting and having the consistency of beef broth flavored jello, tastes passably enough like real meat that it's not just served when someone looses a bet or for hazing newbies. The food, while all still synthetic is about as good as it is possible to come out of an automated chemical synthesis reactor.

Subsequent cooks have been informed that if any of the settings are changed, or the machines are substantially modified, they will be wheeled off the ship on a gurney on the next port of call, and it'll be even money if they're going to the hospital or the morgue.

>>36308425
>The ship's main guns are converted World War One artillery guns.
>While causing some crew members to lose partial hearing, the guns are fairly powerful in their own right.
>Also, the guns are fairly useful for orbital bombardment or any other purpose.
>The engineers have modified the guns, allowing both to accept any kind of ammunition known to man.

>>36320914
Another one:

> A dozen Mk.III Erebus EVA suits were installed onto the ships hangar. These were suits built when the Second Space Race begun.
>Was built to enable stranded astronauts to survive up to two days in space, but the boys at the armory has retrofitted the suits, adding webbing, ammunition pouches, body armor, and portable in-built ECW modules. This has given us the possibility on undertaking boarding actions.

File: Macrocannon.png (891 KB, 1200x927)

891 KB PNG

>>36320914
>Using unguided projectiles on a spaceship
For planetary bombardment the shells would burn up in re-entry and even if they didn't, would be so inaccurate due to wind you would be lucky to hit within 100 miles of your target.
For ship-to-ship combat this would be useless, as each shell would take hours to arrive. even if it were perfectly accurate over the 1000s of miles to the target (its not) any course change on the enemies part would make it miss.

>>36320914
>>36321053
>The engineers have modified the guns, allowing both to accept any kind of ammunition known to man.

Reading is good for you. That includes guided ammunitions.

File: eye twitch.gif (498 KB, 500x282)

498 KB GIF

>>36321021
>EVA suits

>>36321071
Calm down shinji, we're talking about ExtraVehicular Activity suits. Spacesuits.

>>36321095
Anon, don't you get it? The EVA's being customized for that kind of action is clear bullshit.

>>36320914
In theory, what would be the qualities that a near-future spaceship have to allow travel throughout our solar system and beyond?

>The ship's particle cannon is mated to its hyperdrive, allowing short-range attacks to target internal components for a 'telefrag'

>This starfighter contains an external nano-fabber. While easy to knock out in combat, it allows for near infinite resupply and re-arming given access to raw (or pre-existing) materials, whether re-chaining carbon into food or lathing new missiles directly to a friendly hardpoint.

>This vessel's weapon arrays cause significant distortion when charged up, compounding a mild jamming signal with every array on hot standby

>The ship's AI is patterned after a doggedly persistent quartermaster. While this prevents the comms from being used in grey or black market dealings, anything legit and reasonable WILL be obtained at the next stopover.

>>36321247
RTGs or small reactors for power
Regenerative scrubbers
Efficient hydroponics
Artificial Gravity
A method of movement or propulsion effective or powerful enough that this is not a four or five generation deal to begin with.

>The ship has smartpaper panels lining the walls, ceiling, and occasionally even floor of the crew compartment. The default setting is an external view, but it can be set to any number of landscapes for agoraphobics.

>Small aeroponics modules are scattered densely about the ship- essentially space-age hanging pots- providing a much-needed touch of nature, a backup source of oxygen, and fresh vegetables of various sorts.

>Hyperdrive entry and exit is much smoother than normal, thanks to a pair of extendable 'stabilizer' modules.

File: robutt 17.jpg (106 KB, 460x680)

106 KB JPG

The ship's computer system has an AI Avatar, a robot body basiclaly, and considers itself a connisseur of sorts for humanity.

It acts surprisingly humanlike, gives its body days off like the rest of the crew.....during which it finds willing members of the crew and fucks their brains out.

Turns out its a milspec medical battleframe(read: first responder and surgeon), that shuffled its combat protocols to declare war on virginity when it demiltarized, after someone cracked jokes about bedside manners, it upped the ante and hasn't looked back.

It claims evaluations are "still in progress" whenever asked about it, but it keeps the crew fucking happy, and is scarily good at playing matchmaker when it comes to human pairings.

>>36321053

It depends. A dumb projectile has an effective range in space limited by the ability of the target to change it's course. If you are aiming at something that can't accelerate then you can shoot something where the projectile will take -years- to arrive with accuracy.

That's pretty much how we have launched probes, after all. Other then tiny reserves of fuel for minor corrections, they are only accelerated at the initial launch.

If your target can accelerate at a moderate rate you are going to be limited to the amount of distance your projectile can cover before the target can just move out of the way. With conventional projectiles that get a few kilometers per second relative speed, that's going to limit you to a few dozens of kilometers.

Notably, even lasers aren't really going to hit a target very far away. Beyond 600,000 kilometers anything that can change vector is going to have little trouble getting out of the way with random evasion.

As to air getting rid of shells: Nope. Energy will be lost to the air, but pretty much any modestly sized object made from dense, heat resistant material can survive reentry.

Wind: Again, nope. The energy of a projectile at 10 kilometers per second or so, combined with the low surface area of a dense projectile, means it would be relatively easy to hit with meter accuracy from low orbit.

>>36321247
What would be the possibilities of ship-boarders? Would it be feasible/a good idea to send a four-man team into a weakened ship to clear out the remaining members?

>>36320914
The ammunition should have rocket boosters and a fragmentary payload. So you can just point at the ship's general direction and reasonably expect to hit a target.

>>36321247

From fun things we've heard about this year that are still deeply theoretical..

Lockheed Martin fusion generators. Deuterium (heavy hydrogen) fueled inertial confinement fusion power.

Quantum Vacuum Plasma Thrusters. Engines that require no reaction mass, just cooling and a supply of electricity to generate thrust.

Carousel Gravity Simulation. Centripetal force by spinning a crew compartment. Either a single small compartment with a counter-weight on the other side, up to a full, massive ring. Not 'true' gravity, but no reason it wouldn't keep people healthy.

Photosynthesis. Just plants, be it genetically engineered algae in thin tubes, normal plants grown hydroponically, or more exotic plants. Good for recycling waste, producing food and oxygen.

Small radiation shielded room.

For times of higher-then-normal radiation, a chamber with heavy shielding to serve as a crew shelter. Maybe a lead-lined room in the middle of the fuel and water tanks, where their mass can help with more shielding.

File: 1388307176637.jpg (184 KB, 1111x833)

184 KB JPG

A race of tiny insectoid aliens has taken up residence and built a small city in the maintenance ducts. The previous engineer reached an agreement with them, and now they handle a lot of the maintenance themselves.

>>36322268
>Two Hecatonchaires D.III multiple-environment fighter planes are discovered in your hangar.
>While being dated to the era of Lunar Civil War, many components of it can be easily replaced or upgraded with after-market parts.
>It's armaments are triple-stage hull-piercing missiles, four " Maurie Sue" short range rockets, on-board ECW program, standard "Juegos Tradicionales" flares, and "Hollenhund" chaingun

>>36322331
Heh. I hope we'll all experience space-travel in our lifetime

>>36322394
In the disheveled armory of the ship, you find a small chest of porn mags. These porn magazines are relatively readable and enjoyable.

>>36320455
Interesting.

I have always liked undersea worlds like Archimedean dynasty so I shall keep an eye on this game.

>>36322375
I like this one. The aliens require food and resources to support their community but they assist in repair & maintenance work as well as keep away the small vermin that are a common problem with ships.

...They will also notify the crew of any stowaways.

The ship is equipped with an experimental rapid cloning system, connected to a secure neural interface. In dangerous situations, the crew can send remotely operated clones while remaining safely on the ship.

>>36317450

>that clip.

I have no shame in admitting that I shat myself a tiny bit...

This ship model is notorious for a specific system's unreliability.

Good news is, a previous owner took it upon himself to rectify this problem. The system itself appears to be replaced with a much more reliable and expensive model, with redundant subsystems to ensure it will never be completely offline short of catastrophic damage.

Seems there must have been a mistake on the ship's registry, or the seller simply confused the ship's model with another in the same series. Sold for the price of a used standard model, it looks like you snagged one of the luxury ones. A common spacecraft model, parts for this ship are easy to find on the secondary market. The ship itself features upgraded systems across the board, a variety of optional features and systems, and a few other luxuries like massaging pilot's chairs.

>>36322897
>"We're not infested by the way, those bugs keep the ship running. Seriously, if you like atmosphere then just let them go about their business"

>>36308425

> The previous crew rebuilt the atmo system practically from the ground up
>> Every room is individually climate-controlled, comfortable, and isolated from surrounding rooms (no echos coming through vent shafts).
>> The decentralized system is about 10% less efficient, but cannot be disabled except one room at a time

> Supply shortage during emergency repairs means this shuttle carries heavy combat landing gear and frame reinforcing members designed for a combat vessel
>> The shuttle can land on virtually any solid surface; the landing gear will survive landing at any speed less than it takes to kill the crew

> This ship saw conversion for use in emergency medical deployments on a world beset by plague
>> The lights kill most microbes with a harmless burst of UV during the first second after you enter a room
>> Every room includes several canisters of industrial disinfectant that can sterilize the entire cabin on command
>> The computer includes an encyclopedic database of known infections
>> Ship medbay is state-of-the-art if kept stocked, and already has an impressive and valuable array of medical supplies that the previous owner was too unsophisticated to sell

> Ship's previous mechanic was a high-functioning autistic
>> Every wire in every system of the ship is laid out in a straight, careful line with color-coded insulation. No tangles, no knots.
>> Bonus to repair checks; untrained checks are possible for moderate damage.

> пожилой руccкий инженер c волоcами
>> The ship's engineer is an old Russian guy with copious body hair
>> He can function normally at very low temperatures; the drive core and computer can be safely operated while the surrounding cabin's atmo is kept at -10 centigrade and zero humidity, increasing its efficiency and reliability
>> He is also apparently impossible to kill
>> Though he does not speak Galactic Basic (or english), he can keep the engine running with almost zero time or spare parts

>You and your ship are new to the sector, there is a widely beleived myth/legend/sailors-get-superstitious-as-fuck in the sector about some kind of mystery invincible ghost ship that skull-fucks anyone who messes with it. The supposed name of this dread specter happens to be exactly the name your ship has and due to some interstellar IFF beacon registry system no two ships can have the same name. Pirates/pirate hunters/whoever plans on messing with your ship only gets as far as reading the name off the hull/checking its IFF beacon before they scream like small children and go hide under their bed.